#Slay Me (Rock Gods Book Two)

[khaire-traveler]

⚔️ Perseus Worship Guide 🪽

~ Art by DocZenith on ArtStation ~

The great ancient Greek hero, Perseus - a hero so renowned that an entire children's book series was written inspired by him. He accomplished fantastical feats with the very gods themselves rooting for his victory. Many people admire him, but few seem to be aware that worship is not only an option for gods. Heroes, such as Perseus, can be worshipped as well, and have been throughout history. Explore the various ways Perseus can be worshipped in the modern day in the enlightening post that follows.

***I am not an educator or historian. This is solely being made for religious purposes, and I will be touching on UPG.**

°· Who is Perseus? ·°

As stated above, Perseus is an ancient Greek hero starring in his own myths. As a biological son of Zeus (NOT Poseidon) and a mortal woman, trials and troubles were a guarantee in his life. His mother, Danaë, was trapped in a tower before his birth, due to her father, Akrisios', fear of a prophecy that claimed her son would kill him. Despite her predicament, Zeus was able to enter her locked tower, taking the form of a golden rain shower, and Danaë became pregnant with his son (don't ask me, man; I don't know). Her father immediately cast her out upon discovering the child, placing both her and her son, Perseus, into a chest floating on the sea. However, the pair made it safely to the island of Seriphos, being sheltered by the fisherman Diktys, brother to the king of the island, Polydectes. Diktys would also raise Perseus as a father figure.

Perseus would grow to become the eventual slayer of the gorgon Medusa, arguably his most famous accomplishment, as well as the savior of Andromeda, an Ethiopian princess who had been chained to a rock to be fed to a sea monster. He also freed his mother from King Polydectes by turning him to stone with Medusa's head. Perseus' grandfather fled from him in fear, allowing Perseus to assume the throne of his kingdom. Although Perseus didn't purposely kill his grandfather, he was the cause of his grandfather's demise via an accidental discus throw (prophecy fulfilled 🔴).

He later fathered many children. With his lovely wife Andromeda, he had the sons Perses, Alcaeus, Heleus, Mestor, Sthenelus, Electryon, and Cynurus, and two daughters, Gorgophone and Autochthe. He's also said to be an ancestor of the famous Herakles, who is also a demigod son of Zeus. Unlike Herakles, however, there don't seem to be recorded myths of Perseus ascending to godhood, although he was still worshipped as a Greek hero and Founder of Mycanaea.

✿*Well-known myths *✿

His most widespread myth is that of slaying Medusa, which he did in an effort to protect his mother from the cruel King Polydectes, who had fallen in love with her. Perseus believed Polydectes wasn't worthy of his mother's hand in marriage (and he was absolutely right, in my opinion; Polydectes wished to enslave his mother), so as a plot to send Perseus away, Polydectes plotted to send Perseus on the impossible quest of slaying the gorgon Medusa. Before setting out on his journey, Perseus prayed to Zeus, terrified of the challenges that lay ahead, and his father answered by sending Hermes and Athena to deliver five gifts that would aid Perseus' quest. Hermes lent his brother the god's winged sandals and sword, providing him with Haides' helm of invisibility also (though some ancient people seemed to think this wasn't this case and were very opinionated about it lol). Athena lent Perseus her polished shield, able to reflect the gorgon's appearance without petrifying him, and a bag that he could safely store the head in, warning Perseus that Medusa's gaze would still turn others into stone, even in death. The pair then instructed Perseus to seek out the infamous Graia, sisters of the gorgons, to discover Medusa's location.

With cunning and quick-wit, Perseus was able to take the shared eye and tooth between the sisters, and hold them hostage until they revealed Medusa's location. Upon his arrival, he used the reflective shield gifted to him by Athena to avoid looking directly at Medusa, and sword guided by Athena's might, he beheaded the ghastly Gorgon in one swift maneuver of his blade. Her sisters attempted to avenge her, but donning Haides' helm of invisibility, Perseus was able to easily evade capture. After a few other misadventures along the way, he returned to discover that his mother had to flee from Polydectes while he was away, so out of vengeance for the bullshit Polydectes put them both through, Perseus slew him using the severed head of Medusa. A fitting death - that guy was an asshole. As a show of gratitude for sheltering him and his mother, Perseus also made Diktys the new king of Seriphos.

Another of his myths that he's well-known for is that of rescuing Andromeda from her fate. He came across Andromeda after slaying Medusa, on his way home from the adventure. The princess' father, King Cepheus, chained her naked to a rock surrounded by raging oceans and a ravenous sea monster, Cetus. Her father wished to appease Poseidon after his wife angered the God by claiming Andromeda was more beautiful than the Nereids (Sea Nymphs). An Oracle claimed that sacrificing Andromeda to Cetus was the only way to soothe Poseidon's anger. Luckily, using the winged sandals that Hermes gifted him, Perseus flew over the stormy waters to Andromeda and freed her, immediately earning her hand in marriage. Andromeda's original suitor, Phineus, was upset at the marriage, but Perseus turned him to stone with Medusa's head and carried on.

Although these are his most well-known myths, there are still other myths about Perseus that I didn't cover here. Overall, he is a widely recognized Greek hero, known for his quick wit, the love he had for his mother, and the founding of Mycanaea, considered by many ancient Greeks to be the father of all Mycanaea (after making Diktys king of Seriphos, Perseus went on to find the land known as Mycanaea). If you're interested in learning more of his myths (which I highly suggest), my resources will be listed at the end of the post.

·•✷ Sacred Symbols ✷•·

The sacred symbols featured below are pulled from his myths and historical depictions I found of him.

The severed head of Medusa

Swords (particularly sickle-shaped) and shields

Winged sandals/boots and a winged helm

The Helm of Invisibility

Snakes and sea serpents

Treasure chests/chests in general

Raging oceans (due to the Andromeda myth)

Rain made of gold; storm clouds (from his birth)

Discus (basically an ancient Greek frisbee-like thing)

Fishnets and fishing gear (due to his upbringing)

Fountains

A pegasus or horse

Wings (from the sandals and Medusa herself)

An eye and a tooth (from the three hags)

Broken chains/restraints (from Andromeda's rescue)

It's rather disappointing how difficult it is to find information about his worship in ancient times that isn't hidden behind a paywall. That said, I gathered some UPG from worshippers of his who were willing to share! A reminder that the below is based on UPG.

Overcoming challenges/obstacles

Feathers

Spears

Knives/other blade weapons outside of swords

Handcrafted arts and items

Boats/sailing

Mirrors/reflective surfaces

Wind, especially near or on the water

Rainfall on sunny days

The colors blue, lilac, dark gray, and gold

Eels, sea-snakes, and seabirds, especially sea-eagles

Clumps of snakes (resembles Medusa's head)

Freshly bloomed flowers; purple and blue flowers

Plants: lilac, sword lillies (dangerous to cats), peony, red hot poker (especially purples ones), foxgloves, lavender, gingko trees, and cedar trees

Herbs: Lavender, parsley, basil, lemongrass, and bay leaf

Myrrh, frankincense, sandalwood, jasmine, and ocean scents

��-« Epithets »-›

The following is a list of titles I found for Perseus. Supposedly, they are historically attested, but if I'm going to be honest, I would take it with a grain of salt, as the sources on this were few and far between. I'll also include a short list of purely UPG/modern titles. First, however, is the historically attested list:

Godlike

Gold-begotten (referencing his birth)

Valiant

The Harvester (referencing his role in the births of Pegasus and Chrysaor, who came out of Medusa's neck after her head was cut off ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯)

The Horseman

The Warrior Chief (referencing his prowess in battle)

Deliverer of Andromeda (referencing rescue of Andromeda)

Slayer of Medusa/the Gorgo

The Eagle Son of the Golden Sire (referencing his divine lineage and birth, "The Eagle" being Zeus)

Father/Founder/King of Mycanaea (referencing the belief that he founded Mycanaea)

Perseus of Argos (referencing where he resided)

Son of Danaë

Son of Zeus

Now the UPG/modern epithets list:

Chain Breaker/Breaking (referencing rescue of Andromeda and his mother)

Starry-eyed (referencing his constellation)

Starry-footed (referencing his constellation and winged sandals)

Stone-shielded (referencing Medusa's head on the shield)

Wind-swift (referencing his winged sandals)

Courageous/Daring

The Cunning

The Resilient

The Shield-bearer (referencing the shield he uses)

The Unconquerable

The Wayfarer (referencing his many travels)

Brother of the Owl-eyed Warrior (referencing Athena)

Brother of the Silver-tongued Messenger (referencing Hermes)

Son of the Kingly Zeus

Son of the Rich-haired Danaë (based on an epithet of Danaë)

(Image depicts Perseus, Medusa, and Athena)

·✩· Perseus Worship in the Modern Day ·✩·

Within the modern day, worship may seem intimidating if you don't know how to go about it, but thankfully, it's much easier than it may seem. Before I continue, please be aware that there is no one way to worship any Greek entity, be it hero or deity. Worship varies from person to person, even when they worship the same entity, and that's both normal and historically supported. In ancient Greece, worship was different all across the land with some city-states not worshipping entire deities that others did. It's ok if your practice doesn't look exactly the same as someone else's; in fact, it probably shouldn't!

A common way of worshipping any Greek entity in the modern day is creating a custom altar. Some worshippers keep their altars outdoors, preferring for their space to be out in nature, while others keep their altars indoors, preferring their altar to be within the home. Where you keep your altar is entirely up to you, although indoor altars are typically more common due to their accessibility for most people. Being that Perseus is a hero who's traveled far and wide, going on daring adventures for the benefit of others rather than himself, a place to put his altar in the home could be near the door or window - a nod to the various journeys he's embarked on. An outdoor altar for Perseus could be located near a body of water - a nod to both the rescue of Andromeda and his escape to Seriphos with his mother as a young boy. If it's near water, be careful to keep it far enough away that it won't be swept away (make sure to keep flash floods in mind, too). I also don't suggest having anything that could be bad for the earth on an outdoor altar; it could harm the environment, should any of those items be lost.

It's important to note that you don't need an altar to worship an entity. That might be a hot take to some, but I've known many worshippers who either can't have an altar, due to living circumstances, or simply don't want to, due to personal beliefs. Worship however feels correct to you (though I highly suggest still being respectful). Religion and spirituality are very personal, and I encourage you to explore that personal connection. Don't be afraid to do things a little differently!

Many modern altars have a candle, meant to be lit in honor of the entity. If you don't want a candle on your altar, that's ok! Candle scents are typically based on things associated with the entity or things that simply remind the worshipper of them. For Perseus, some potential candle scents could be ocean, storm, rain (UPG after this), lily, lavender, lilac, or sandalwood. Feel free to choose a scent that calls to you, even if it wasn't mentioned!

Most altars have various objects dedicated to the entity they were made for - things that remind you of the entity, depict images of the entity directly, or sacred symbols of the entity. These are called "offerings". Some stay on the altar permanently while others may not - it's entirely up to you what you choose to do with your offerings! When it comes to food offerings, I advise you not to keep them on the altar for too long, since they're often susceptible to perishing. Throw food offerings away or, if they're good for the environment, you can bury them outside. Some people also choose to burn perishable offerings, but I don't personally suggest it if you're not sure what can and can't be safely burned. In the next section below, I'll include a list of modern offerings you can give to Perseus. The list has suggestions; you aren't required to give any of the items mentioned if you don't want to!

Outside of altar worship, you can also do "devotional acts" - actions you do in honor of Perseus and with him in mind. In order to make an entity aware that I'm about to do a devotional act, I usually pray to them beforehand or declare aloud that I'm about to do something for them. Daily activities, that you would've done anyway, are also ok to dedicate to an entity; devotional acts don't have to be something you go super out of your way to do if you don't have time or energy for that. Involving entities in your daily activities is actually a great way of welcoming their presence directly into your life and can help with bonding. Two sections down is a list of devotional acts you're welcome to try. Just as the offerings I mention aren't required, neither are the devotional acts.

When in need of communicating with Perseus, I suggest utilizing divination, prayers, meditations, or journaling. There are other ways of communicating with entities, but these are the most common that I see. Regarding divination, there are near endless methods of divination you can try, from tarot cards to pendulums to a normal deck of playing cards. Although prayer is likely one of the most direct ways to communicate, divination typically allows you to have a back and forth conversation, to some extent, which is partially why so many people engage with it. If you're unfamiliar with any divination, I'd recommend trying whichever method calls you the most and practicing often to develop a skill with it. Divination can take a lot of practice, but that's not a bad thing; everyone starts somewhere! If you're unsure how to pray, the following link leads to some suggestions. If you can't meditate, no sweat; it's not required! Meditation can be useful for some when trying to connect with an entity's energy, but for others, it's not helpful at all, and that's ok. For journaling, you can simply write to Perseus as if you're writing in a diary or write him stylized letters. Maybe keep your journal on his altar as well!

At first, it may be difficult to determine when Perseus has responded to something you've prayed for or communicated about. A few ways an entity might make their answer known are through dreams, conversations/words you overhear, frequently spotting their sacred symbols (animals included), having a flash of a relevant image in your mind, strong gut feelings to do/say something specific, sensing another presence with you, and, of course, communicating through divination. There are many, many other ways an entity might express their answer to you, but these are a few I see fairly commonly within the Hellenic Polytheist and Pagan communities. If you struggle telling when you've received a sign versus when you're just overthinking it, this link can lend a helpful hand in being able to tell. I also personally use the rule of three: once is noticeable 🤔, twice is a coincidence 🤨, and thrice is a certainty 🧐.

-

·✩· What is Perseus Like in Worship (UPG)? ·✩·

This is SOLELY based on UPG and SPG that I've gathered through various means. Out of respect, I will not be @ing the individuals who provided this information, unless they ask me to do so. Be aware that no one can definitively speak for the gods, heroes, or any other entity; everyone's experience with them will vary, even in seemingly small ways. Do not expect your experience to mimic the following experiences exactly.

I decided to gather people's experiences with Perseus in worship to hopefully provide a better feel for what Perseus may be like. I'll be numbering the experiences I was told of because each situation was expressly unique enough that separating them will be useful. Each experience will begin with two adjectives outlining the main point of the experience, as some of these individuals intentionally worship specific aspects of Perseus. Although your experience may vary, here are some things you may encounter with him:

⚔️ Young and Rebellious. 💥 This person told me that they explicitly worship a younger aspect of Perseus, before he became a king. They described him as spirited, determined, and bold. He encouraged standing up for oneself and others, and dislikes figures of authority. The way he was described reminds me of a typical "rebellious teen" stereotype (this is not an insult, just something I found interesting, as my experience strongly differed). He seemed to have more of a hands-on approach to lessons and problems, but that wasn't discussed further.

🐎 Humble and Kind. 🧡 This person only interacted with Perseus through their partner, but every time they did, they described him as being very modest and respectful. Despite his later status as a king, he seemed to regard everyone as an equal and tended to be very patient as well. This person stated that their partner said Perseus still knew how and when to put his foot down and often tried to pass that lesson along, since assertiveness was a struggle for their partner. Perseus was described as being a gentle guide as well, preferring for their partner to come to their own conclusions but still assisting them along the journey.

🪽 Swift and Smart. 🛡️ This person described Perseus as being kind and respectful, but being blunt when it was needed. He fully embraced both cunning and wit, and encouraged this person to solve problems by thinking outside of the box. Rather than giving away solutions immediately, he would prefer to let this person think through a situation. He aided a lot with thinking on their feet as well as asserting themselves in subtle yet effective ways. Something that remained consistent with the last experience was his hands-off approach to solving problems, preferring the person to listen to themselves first and foremost.

✨ My Experience. ✨ I do not worship Perseus, but a few times throughout the creation of this post, I felt his energy nearby. In my experience, he was very quiet, patient, and respectful. He respected my boundaries and seemingly regarded me as an equal. His modesty was striking, but despite this, he was still well aware of his talents. He was extremely clever and intelligent, and in some ways, he reminded me of an owl who observes his surroundings fully before he acts. He still made a point to assert himself when needed, however, and would jump in the moment he felt it necessary. Interestingly, he had a very hands-off approach to this post. When he did help, it was much appreciated, though. He was very different from other heroes I've interacted with, and overall, I enjoyed his company. c:

✧ ⟨Offerings ⟩✧

The following is a list of offerings you can give to Perseus as a show of worship. They're simply suggestions; you don't have to use them if you don't want to!

Decorated chests/boxes (maybe even keep his altar in a chest)

A candle that reminds you of him

Frankincense, myrrh, sandalwood, or any other incense that reminds you of him

Sword and shield imagery

Imagery of a pegasus or horse

Imagery of Medusa's head; imagery of the Aegis (Athena's shield that she affixes Medusa's head to)

Feathers (for his winged sandals)

Snake and sea serpent imagery; a stuffed animal snake or sea serpent

Ethically sourced snake skulls, especially sea snakes; ethically sourced snake shed

Imagery of a raging ocean; imagery of rain made of gold

Seashells

Fishnets/fishing gear

Ethically sourced fish bones/shark teeth

Breaking/broken chains imagery; broken handcuffs

Gifts from your mom or a mother figure in your life to you (it's ok if you don't have anything)

Jewelry that reminds you of him

Water-based gems/crystals

Art/depictions of him and his ventures

Imagery of spears (as an acknowledgement of Athena and her aid)

Imagery of winged sandals (as an acknowledgement of Hermes and his aid)

Encouraging affirmations about pushing through, defying expectations, and overcoming obstacles

Fountain imagery

A mask of Medusa's face

Eye and tooth imagery; ethically sourced animal teeth (you can use human teeth, but I personally wouldn't)

Family heirlooms passed down from maternal (or parental) figures

Lost trinkets found at the beach/lakeshore

Imagery of an ancient Greek helm/the helm of invisibility

Toys/items from your childhood that mean a lot to you

Mirrors/reflective surfaces

Replica sail boats/toy boats

Flowers, leaves, or herbs that remind you of him

White wine with a bit of honey

Warm herbal tea with honey

A glass of water (or salt/sea water)

Energizing drinks - coffee, certain teas, energy shakes, protein shakes, etc.

Energizing foods - nuts, trail mix, vegetables, oatmeal, eggs, bananas, etc.

Breads, pastries, grains with honey, natural honey, tasty candies, fresh fruits, fish, or something you made by hand for Perseus specifically

｡◉* Devotional Acts *◉ ｡

The following is a list of devotional activities you can do in honor of Perseus. These are just suggestions; you don't have to do them if you don't want to!

Learn how to swim; go swimming

Go sailing, kayaking, paddle boarding; engage in water-related activities

Play frisbee with friends or pets

Go fishing (legally, please)

Be kind to/encourage yourself when going through a difficult time

Make a list of things you've overcome; acknowledge your accomplishments, no matter how small they seem

Learn how to ride a horse; go horse-back riding

Stay hydrated; drink water

Try eating a healthy diet or meal if possible

Try exercising; do some movement throughout your day

Spend time with a maternal figure in your life or with a mother you know (for example, a friend or sibling who became a mom)

Be kind to children; spend time with the kids in your life

Watch a comforting movie/show from your childhood

Learn about self-defense; carry self-defense items (knives, pepper spray, etc.)

If you have a personal mirror, decorate it with things you love or positive self-affirmations

Create a playlist of songs that remind you of him; listen to the playlist whenever you want c:

Create a Pinterest board for him; save pins that remind you of him

Play strategy games, competitive or not

Learn how to wield a sword; swords are objectively cool

Visit any local fountains (not a drinking fountain, but the kind that people throw coins in)

Offer someone a helping hand; engage in random acts of kindness

Send your loved ones a kind message; maybe tell them you love them, wish them a good day, or encourage them

Stand up for others, especially if you witness a wrong done against them

Attend protests that stand against corrupt governments/politicians

Support children-focused, anti-domestic abuse, young/single mothers, or international relief organizations

Support ocean conservation efforts

Donate children's and hygiene supplies to homeless shelters; hygiene kits, toys, child socks/shoes, child clothes, baby food, diapers, etc.

Pick up trash around bodies of water

Sing/dance to songs the empower you, lift you up, or encourage you to keep moving forward

Make a list of things you're proud of; even getting out of bed can be a point of pride

Light a candle in his honor; burn incense in his honor

Plant/care for flowers or other plants that remind you of him

Create something for him - a painting, drawing, piece of digital art, wood carving, crochet project, song, short story, collage, etc.

Take a salt bath (with bath salts specifically!!!!)

Engage in a mental challenging/stimulating activities

•★ Conclusion ★•

To cover every piece of information about Perseus that exists would be a difficult task, and one that would likely take years of hard work. I hope this can at least be a starting point for any prospective worshippers and can offer a more condensed view of who exactly Perseus is. It can be challenging finding a place to start, but once you take your first step, you're already well on your way. I wish you, the reader, luck in your future ventures. May Perseus walk beside you, if you wish him to. Take care.

-

-

-

Sources:

Theoi.com's entry on Perseus

Tufts University sources on the Medusa myth

History Cooperative's informed article on Perseus

Cults and Rites in Ancient Greece by Michael H. Jameson

Gods and Heroes - Perseus by Daniel Ogden

UPG was gathered from unnamed individuals, as well as my own very brief experiences with Perseus

[socra-time]

Socra’s Naruto Liveblog, Ep. 152-157

(aka the Kurosuki Removal Mission)

Ep 152:

-anddd we’re already starting with someone getting buried alive. Yikes.

-goddamn Naruto is really just carrying three whole adults on his back

-LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MY SPECIAL SON AW HE WORKS SO HARD

-Anko stealing Tsunade’s food was kinda iconic

-I love that Tsunade calls Gai’s team “your kids” lol

-and then Gai really said “I love those kids more than anything in the world”, MY HEART 😭

-Naruto is so much shorter than all of Team Gai lmao (altho in my head Tenten is very short)

-I stan Lee so hard. He could literally say anything and I’ll just smile and be like “that’s my boy”

-Neji has really chilled out so much from before the Chunin Exams, he actually was kinda smiling at some of Naruto’s antics

-Gai and Lee running in their sleep is so unserious

-oh my god as someone with really bad spice tolerance, I felt for everyone so much when they tried the curry

-omg the curry was so spicy it made Neji activate his Byakugan, that’s actually fucking hilarious

Ep 153:

-the graveyard of people who were buried alive is one of the darkest things I’ve seen in the show so far I think

-between this mission and the beetle mission, it’s so interesting to see Naruto interact with other teams and clash with their established dynamics and way of doing things

-who the FUCK is this Raiga dude talking to on his back. It’s so creepy

-I don’t like the way Karashi talks

-I love Lee’s little notebook

Ep 154:

-I’m very curious about the abilities of whoever the Ranmaru person on Raiga’s back is. Whoever they are, they seem to be super powerful

-ohhhh fuck the kids are in trouble

-Lee fighting in his sleep will never not be funny

-ah so Ranmaru is very much another Haku situation then. The show even acknowledges it

Ep 155:

-again, the way Karashi talks annoys me. His hair slays tho

-the black tornado jutsu with the Kurosuki goons all stacked on top of each other was deeply unserious

-yay I like that we’re actually getting to see Tenten fight!

-god Lee has such a big heart

-Grandma Sancho is kinda an icon. I love little old lady characters

-I know there’s still two episodes of this arc so I’m just waiting for shit to go wrong now

-this is extremely off-topic but Ranmaru’s hair is literally the same as Bugsy’s from Pokemon Gold and Silver

-welp. Shit went wrong.

Ep 156:

-oh god Tenten is going to get her ass kicked isn’t she

-wait okay she actually put up a decent fight

-also Tenten stabbing her wooden staff into Raiga’s foot made me giggle

-ugh Karashi is such a whiney lil bitch. He needs to take a page out of Kimimaro’s book and grow a spine (see what I did there lmao)

-welp rip Neji and Naruto. It’s fuckin LEE time now

-AW SHIT THE WEIGHTS ARE COMING OFF

-Tenten is both nice to Ranmaru and also kind of done with him

Ep 157:

-the animation of Lee tumbling down the rocks was fucking hilarious

-oh Grandma Sancho the icon that you are-

-oh my god Lee is such a fucking GOOBER

-Ranmaru is seriously OP as fuck

-also Ranmaru trying to guide Raiga and himself off a cliff is some dark shit

-YESSSSS DRUNK LEE COMEBACK

-the animators must have so much fun animating drunk Lee

-I feel like Neji passing out each time he’s fed the alcoholic curry of life is confirming that he’s both a) a MEGA lightweight and b) a sleepy drunk

-Raiga has kinda overstayed his welcome, I needed him gone like an episode ago

-okay I will say that him going out in a literal blaze of glory via lightning was kinda epic tho

-aw Ranmaru is staying at the curry shop! That’s really nice actually:)

-Lee is such a cutie patootie

[blradley]

A powerpoint introduction to Liesmyth!

(I swear the next one will actually be in Comic Sans... shout out to @incandescent-creativity for popularizing this medium!)

Anyway...

Do you wanna read a dark, Norse-inspired Adult Fantasy?

Do you wanna read about queer gods causing mayhem?

(literally every single character is queer lmaooooo)

Do you wanna support a queer, multiply disabled author?

Look no further than Liesmyth! We're out on subs at the moment - so, pretty-please reblog this powerpoint if you like the concept! Let's prove to all those prospective publishers that there's an audience for my book!

Image IDs:

All eleven images are power point slides.

Image 1: Title card reading 'Liesmyth: or, how Sigyn ruined everything, by B. L. Radley'. The words are displayed over a person in (...vaguely) Viking-era garb, against a green background. Only a slice of their torso is visible.

Image 2: A picture of an ash tree against a green, cool, mountainous scene. In a yellow text box, words read: Welcome to a world inspired by Norse mythology, where witches can climb through the cosmos using the boughs of an ancient ash tree, and any magic is possible, so long as it is cast with a suitable sacrifice. Yes, it’s basically a Viking Isekai. Shoot me. Then, a quote in italics: I know an ash tree named Yggdrasil, Nine realms cradled in its loamy arms… Prophecy of the Voluspa, verse 19

Image 3: Meet the characters! An image shows a white woman in Viking-era dress, leaning against a fence, looking pensieve. She is introduced as Sigyn Narisdottir. Her quote is: “It’s a God-eat-God world out there…” Below this, there is a description of Sigyn, reading: Just a nice, normal Christian woman from a nice, normal Christian village. (Totally not a gay witch, haha no, why would you suggest such a thing.) After her father is killed by his own God, Þórr, Sigyn has only one chance to free his trapped ghost from eternal torment. She must confront Þórr and slay him in combat. But how can a mortal defeat a God? Traits are bullet pointed at the bottom of the page. Hers are: Ruthless, ambitious, cunning, and desperate.

Image 4: The next character description is of Loki. His quote is “Monsters lost their menace when they huddled crying in the corner. And when you might use them for your own ends.” His image shows a clean-shaven half-naked man sat against a scandinavian-esque backdrop of rugged rocks and dried grass. He is white, with curly red hair, and is looking curiously off to one side. His description reads: The savior of the Gods, or their bane? A framed innocent, or a prophesized murderer? A victim, or a monster? Loki is a man of juxtaposed polarities, not least of which being that he isn’t a man at all. At least, not when it doesn’t suit him. Sigyn knows he’s dangerous. But in the viper nest of Ásgarð’s royal court, he might be her only ally… or her downfall. His traits are: Sly, wily, and 'not to be trusted'.

Image 5: The two characters introduced on this slide are Freyja and Thor. Freyja's image is of an Arab woman staring directly at the camera, expression serene, curly hair falling around her face. Her quote is: “Goddess of beauty. Goddess of desire. All who saw Freyja fell a little in love—but though silken longing stirred in my belly, I wrung it dead, reminding myself that Freyja was a goddess of bloodshed, too.” Her description reads: Queen of the Vanir, Freyja is an ancient and powerful goddess who takes Sigyn as her indentured servant. Her traits are: Proud, cold, and vicious. On the opposite side of the page, Thor's image shows a white, bearded man in an iron helmet glaring into the camera, viking sigils scrawled across his face in charcoal. He is shadowy and menacing. His quote is: “I saw a rainbow flash over a church. I saw a broken sky. I saw the end of everything.” His description is: Eldest prince of the Æsir. Murderer of Sigyn’s father, and countless more beside. The living embodiment of berserker rage, he is the strongest god around – and next to inherit Ásgarð’s throne. Unless Sigyn can stop him. His traits are: Violent, mighty, and 'a storm made flesh'

Image 6: introduces Angrboda and Baldr. Angrboda's image shows a white woman with blonde braids, wearing chain mail and warpaint (black streaks over her face), with a huge axe over one shoulder. Her quote is: “ ‘Sigyn, meet Angrboða: witch of the Ironwoods, god of a lost nation, relic of an elder age, master of magics that not even my darling brother dares dabble in, cosmopolitan worldwalker, mother and father of my children, and—if I might say so—a practitioner of truly superlative strap-game.’ ” Baldr's image is of Assad Zaman, looking wistfully, beautifully, into the camera. His quote is: “Out strode the most beautiful man in all the Nine Worlds. His gentle smile, his topaz eyes, his black curls, the fawn velvet of his cheeks… Oh, warmth radiated from him. I looked at him and felt, for the first time in oh-so-very-long, safe.”

Image 7: introduces Saga and Menglod. Saga's image shows a Black woman in darkness, with facial tattoos and a nose ring. She raises her eyes to the camera, pulling back a dark hood, her expression difficult to read. Her quote is: “In another version of this tale, I stayed with Sága. We travelled to Ljósálfheim every winter—one for every six of Vanaheim’s years—and raised foundlings as our own (for ever were the elvish freer with their loves than those of my world). But in this tale, we reached Freyja’s palace, and I had a dream.” Her description is: Prophet, witch, worldwalker. The woman Sigyn left behind. Menglod's image shows a Black woman smiling slightly, slyly, as she looks back over her shoulder, her natural hair framing her face. Her quote is: “If I tended the hearth in Freyja’s chamber, I left ash on her floors. If I swept the ash, I left streaks invisible to any eyes but Menglǫð’s. If I breathed, I did so far too loudly and regularly, and if I were a considerate soul, I would stop.” Her description is: Freyja’s attendant, and Sigyn’s main rival for her favor.

Image 8: So, like, wtf happens? Set against a background of dramatic red-on-black fire is a description of the book's plot, as follows: Crumbling kingdoms. Hungering Gods. One woman who will end the worlds. Loki, Norse god of fire and mischief, will be tortured until the end of time. And he shall deserve every minute. At least, that’s how the story goes. Behind every great man is a great woman, and behind every genderfluid trickster-god is a spouse who darns his socks, plots his victories and keeps his secrets, as well as her own. After a thousand years of agony, Loki looks to the woman who kneels by his side – his jailer, his torturer, his wife – and asks for a different story. Hers.

Image 9: a continuation of the plot from the previous slide, this time with a cool blue lake as the background, with a viking-style ship floating atop its surface. The image feels less calming, more unnerving in its stillness and the lack of human life. The description reads as follows: Down with the gods. So swore Sigyn, a young mortal woman, after watching her father die at godly hands. One millennium later, she has joined the same pantheon she once despised. Now, as Ragnarǫk approaches – the end of all Nine Worlds – Sigyn narrates the tale of the Norse Gods’ fall, and her own.

Image 10: Themes. A picture of two crossed axes accompanies a list of themes, which are: 1) Revenge. What is a life worth? And what would you give up, to avenge the life of someone you love? 2) Corruption. Can you ever fix a broken system from the inside? Or will it, inevitably, consume you? and 3) Divinity. What does it mean, to become a god? What might you lose along the way?

Image 11: A picture of Loki as a woman, with red hair, dressed in a Viking-style dress and sat on the edge of a Scandinavian dock, accompanies text that reads: This book is for you if you like... Queer-led, queer-written fantasy, with main wlw and nonbinary characters! Court drama and political intrigue, mixed with a sizzling dash of mythology! A prophecy that cannot be averted; a tragedy that cannot be outrun…

[pintsizeninja]

The Genesis of a Ship

Since I'm not posting a new chapter of my Odin/Zane fic this week, I figured I'd take some time to highlight why I started shipping them in the first place!

It's no secret I fell madly in love with Poets of the Fall, and Marko Saaresto (young Odin) in particular, after playing through We Sing for the first time a few days after Alan Wake 2 released. I hadn't written fanfic in 10+ years, but like a lot of folks in this fandom, AW2 inspired me to pick up the proverbial pen again. I knew I wanted to write a fic from young Odin's POV and have it set in the 1970s during the Old Gods' heyday - I just needed a pairing.

When I learned Sam Lake provided his bff Marko with poems to help him craft the lyrics for "Late Goodbye" and all the OGOA songs, something clicked deep in my brain. That was it: Thomas Zane and Odin Anderson would collaborate on a project together, Zane would provide Odin with poetry to write songs that would bring his artistic vision to life - and sparks would fly (this is the premise of my fic Talented Voice).

Then this photo happened at the Game Awards, and it was all over after that.

There's even a basis for it in canon:

1) Odin incorporates Zane's poetry into Balance Slays the Demon, over 40 years after Zane disappeared. I headcanon that since Odin is immune from the changed story, he held onto a book (or at least some typewritten sheets) of Zane's poetry for all that time - or maybe even stole them out of the shoebox at some point. If we take the song at face value (and not because of, y'know, game reasons), that's a long time to hold onto someone's poetry. Zane clearly meant something to Odin.

2) Just listen to the wistful longing in Marko's Odin's voice when he sings "The Poet and the Muse". There is a lot of emotion tied up into that song, which was released six years after Zane disappeared. It's both a love story and a cautionary tale, with Odin lamenting the loss of his lover/friend (depending on how you want to look at it).

Then you have the deleted dialogue between Odin and Saga (spoilers, and it's not clear why this was cut although theories abound, so take it with a grain of salt) where Odin mentions giving Zane a song. While this isn't canon since it was cut, it adds fuel to the 'Odin and Zane collaborated together' fire.

So while the two characters never share any scenes together in the games for obvious reasons, it's quite clear Zane was special to Odin; special enough to write a whole-ass song about him and hold onto his poetry for decades.

Here's why it works:

1) This one varies depending on your interpretation of who Thomas Zane really is/was (and I'm not touching that topic with a 10 foot pole, it's been discussed to death on Reddit 😂), but the late 60s were a wild and crazy time. You know Odin and Tor threw some crazy parties back in the day, and Zane had plans for an artist's commune that included the Anderson brothers - so some shenanigans definitely would've ensued. But even without the rewriting (or expansion, again depending on your interpretation) of Zane's history in AW2, the poet likely would've found himself at those parties regardless. Nothing like a little sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll to get those creative juices flowing. 😎

Which leads me to:

2) They're both creatives. They understand the highest highs and the lowest lows of the creative process. That passion thrums in their veins and leads to a deeper understanding between the two of them. Odin and Zane would just get each other on a different level. While the Old Gods didn't exist prior to Zane's disappearance, we know Odin and Tor had music careers prior to the band's formation in 1971. I could totally see Zane falling for the dashing young rockstar, even before he became Odin; just being completely swept away by that stage presence and that voice. That voice.

Two passionate artists collaborating during the time of free love in the 1960s and 1970s, poetry and music intertwining - it's perfect.

If you want to read more:

My Odin/Zane series is now well over 100,000 words long, with at least another 130,000 words planned, and I'm beyond happy other people have embraced this ship. Shoutout in particular to HopelessScribe on AO3 for also writing Odin/Zane.

And, can't forget this beautiful fanart commissioned from Valentina, with more (NSFW!) Odin/Zane fanart on the way 😈

[flowersforfrancis]

Who's your favourite TSH character and why?? Thank you!

Francis. Why: (A question I believe you’ll regret asking as I’m simply incapable of shutting up. (Skip to the end if you don’t want to read a myriad quotes from a book you’ve obviously already read))

— “Cubitum Eamus” “what?” “Nothing”

— “Does it ever strike you, in a horrible sort of way, how funny this is?”

— “Kind of a Jean Cocteau touch, isn’t it?”

— In reference to Francis: ‘I thought (erroneously) that he dressed like Alfred Douglas, or the Comte de Montesquiou..’

— ‘Francis, stooping to talk to a cat on a doorstep’

— ‘..Francis, in a swish of black cashmere and cigarette smoke’

— ‘I saw Francis Abernathy stalking across the meadow like a black bird, his coat flapping dark and crowlike in the wind’

— ‘he said mockingly’

— “Demigods,” said Francis, laughing. “We could sit on thrones in the town square”

— ‘Though Francis may or may not have been homosexual - and could just as easily have been a really dangerous type of ladies man - he was certainly of that vulpine, well dressed, unflappable sort..’

— ‘The pebbled drive was silver in the moonlight. Francis was standing in the shadows under some trees. When he saw us coming he stepped suddenly onto the lighted path. “Boo,” he said.’

— The country house. Just the country House.

— Francis and Richard’s relationship. I just adore it.

—*Francis cooking*

— “For my bath”

— ‘Francis sat curled in the window seat with a plate of little sandwiches in his lap, reading, in French, the Memoires of the Duc De Saint-Simon…He had gone to several schools in Europe and spoke excellent French, though he pronounced it with the same lazy, snob accent as his English; sometimes I got him to help me with my own own lessons in first-year French, tedious little stories about Marie and Jean-Claude going to tabac, which he read aloud in a languishing, hilarious drawl that sent everyone into hysterics.’

— ‘he was singing, and his high, clear voice, slightly out of key, floated out the kitchen window’

— ‘ “Really,” said Francis, I think I just need an Alka-Seltzer.’

— ‘Francis, Barefoot and still in his bathrobe, stepped over rocks and branches, balancing his glass of ginger ale. Once we got to the lake he waded in, up to his knees, and beckoned dramatically like Saint John the Baptist.’

— “Mother of god”

— ‘To my surprise Francis laughed, a humorless little snort’ 

— ‘Francis, lightning a new cigarette of the end of old one.’

— ‘He held up an imaginary newspaper. “Crazed Hippies Indicted for Rural Thrill-Killing”. “Cult slaying of Old Abe So-and-So” ’

— ‘ “After a minute or two-“ “it was only a few seconds,’ Henry said. “- after a minute..” ’

— “Forgive me, for all the things I did but mostly for the ones that I did not”

— ‘ “you idiot,” he said chuckling. “Did you know your shirt’s on inside out?” ’

— ‘ “Well I know what I’m going to do”, said Francis. He stood up unsteadily and pulled with his forefinger at his collar. Startled I looked up at him and he laughed at my suprise. “I want to sleep,” he said, with a melodramatic roll of his eye, “dormir plutot que vivre!” ’

Anyway, sorry, sorry. I’ll stop before I just write out the entirety of Francis’s lines.

In the end he’s just simply relatable; I too am a queer, anxious, dramatic, admittedly contemptuous, smoker, who makes out with boys (and others) solely because they’re ‘there’ (let’s say this as if it isn’t because I have a habit of destroying/avoiding relationships), who traipses around in elegant black coats, and drinks far too much whisky and red wine. Oh and… I’m also a hypochondriac who despises doctors appointments… And no, this isn’t me saying I’m drawn to Francis because oh, he’s like me. It’s more of a strange idolization of sorts. Of someone who feels like an idyllic version of myself. And so, being the self hating - yet narcissistic - boy that I am, in summary favor Francis.

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Saturday, May 17

BUFFY: Mom! I'm-I'm okay. JOYCE: Buffy, terrible things have happened. What were you doing? SPIKE: What, your mum doesn't know? BUFFY glares at Spike. JOYCE: Know what? BUFFY: That I'm, uh... in a band. A-a rock band with Spike here. SPIKE: Right. She plays the, the triangle. BUFFY: Drums. SPIKE: Drums, yeah. She's, uh, hell on the old skins, you know.

~~BtVS 2x22 “Becoming, Part 2”~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

The Return of the Zeppo (Buffy/Spike, T) by maryperk

the balloon goes up (Cordelia & Willow & Xander, G) by NahaFlowers

Beauty of nature (Willow/Tara, G) by Firerose17

[Untitled - #22 or #36 prompts for fuffy] (Buffy/Faith, not rated) by fictiongods

[Chaptered Fiction]

The Sunnydale Imp, Chapter 21/77 (OC, ensemble, nor rated) by Bloodredtiger

Visiting Limbo, Chapter 6/13 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Soulburnt

Second Coming, Chapter 1/? (Buffy/Faith, T) by daemonology

undone with you, Chapter 5/8 (Buffy/Giles, E) by guin_ramble, TheScholarlyStrumpet (equipoise)

Summer Secrets and Slayer Hearts, Chapter 10/? (Buffy/Giles, Willow/Tara, Xander/Anya, M) by Jazer94

Slayers of Lake Hellmouth, Chapter 3/? (Buffy/Spike, G) by blancheswallpaper

The Demon With No Name, Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only) by Cazzy

A Century of Longing, Chapter 2 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Pyewacket

The Pryce of Tyme, Chapter 9 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Joan963z, Ragini

What Happened On Saturday, Chapter 3 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by thehuntress

Xanadu, Chapter 4 (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only) by violettathepiratequeen

Xanadu, Chapter 4 (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only) by violettathepiratequeen

Willow and the Angels, Chapter 1 (ensemble, not rated) by ILLYRIAN

[Images, Audio & Video]

Textposts: Even more Buffy textposts (Giles, Xander, Buffy/Faith, worksafe) by ihavenoconsistentinterests

Textposts: ✦ calendiles text post memes ✦ (Giles/Jenny, worksafe) by calendials

Textposts: Poor boy (Andrew Wells, worksafe) by garscrucible

Artwork: ATS 303. That Old Gang of Mine (worksafe) by tmcarlee

[Reviews & Recaps]

season 6 actually feels so raw, so intense, gripping, so personal, like it doesn`t want you to look away while everything shatters into small tiny ugly pieces by elverrie

Can Buffy finally kill Angel? Buffy the Vampire Slayer 2x22 'Becoming, Part Two' reaction! by All Bronze, No Brains

Buffy S1E8 "I, Robot... You, Jane" Review by Major Slayage - A Buffy Rewatch Podcast

I just finished all of Angel for the first time by artsygrl2021

Buffy Slays, S1 E2: The Harvest by violettathepiratequeen

PODCAST: 2x22 'Becoming, Part Two' reaction! by All Bronze, No Brains!

PODCAST: S5. Ep15. A Hole in the World by Investigating Angel

PODCAST: Let's Fly Pigeon (BtVS S6E2) by It Stakes Two

[In Search Of]

ISO: Does anyone know of any books (not graphic novels/comics) that take place during [AtS] season five? requested by ceecee1909

ISO: Any Buffy edit ideas? requested by Taras_Willowverse

[Fandom Discussions]

ppl acting like buffy ended the series single like she’s being an independent woman will never stop being funny to me by messedupdoilies

over time i’ve let people convince me otherwise, but i rewatched a little angel season 5 last night and i’ve come to the conclusion that spike was absolutely acting out of character by xaeyrnofnbe

the line delivery in angelus and spike’s first meeting. the way he says “…with another man” specifically by xaeyrnofnbe

god i love anya. i know shes a demon and that’s her explanation for how she is, but in my head she is neurodivergent by lostxspectre

i rlly love this scene [7x20 "Touched"] cuz he’s the one who’s comforting her, watching her sleep. he’s happy but also terrified by professeurm

[Sequel] when I saw who they picked for the new star of the series, my mind instantly noted how she looks like she could be related to Buffy and Dawn by lilyginnyblackv2

Ik some people ship Faith and Buffy but honestly they give too much “straight girl in a homoerotic relationship with her lesbian friend.” by xxthegreenwitchxxteveo

the crushing but casual cruelty of the way Angel tosses out a “love you too” is so well done in Innocence by femmedefandom

fun detail I didn’t notice before. Willow’s first ever magic spell she does, in season two, is a dark spell performed on a Hellmouth by femmedefandom

buffy starting season 6 being so miserable and getting out all alone by herself from her own grave and ending it feeling the fire again by elverrie

If Buffy (the vampire slayer) was smart she would have gotten a job at the undertakers and glued wooden stakes to the lid of every coffin by bluntshavingrazor

How is Giles staying in the States if he has no job? How does he afford his apartment? by discipleofkleio

so we all agree that Drusilla was a potential slayer when she was human, right? by trashdiscourse

can somebody with the knowledge explain to me like what`s the difference between anya and spike. love them both, but i just honestly do not get it by elverrie

the real angst of the mortal/immortal Spuffy is that Buffy knows that she will go to heaven when she dies but they don’t know about Spike by kpchrs

fun lore is that we see 4 slayers die by a vampire on screen [...] Spike is the only vampire we see killing a slayer without any mind tricks, pure fighting skill alone by femmedefandom

[Multiple reblog comments about 2x22 "Becoming pt.2"] by femmedefandom

thinking about butch trans spike and her string* of femme girlfriends by tenderjock

I don’t think Joyce handled the Slayer reveal well at all, that’s pretty clear. However, I do think that Buffy waited much too long to tell her by femmedefandom

[ask by maybehappylittlerobot] Biggest in-universe supporter of the ship? Spuffy (please let it be Dawn) answered by takaraphoenix

Ok you know the scene, the infamous scene, in Empty Place, where they kick Buffy out of her own house because they don’t like how she’s leading them by peachesandvampires

Which is your favorite season premiere and why? by porchpoetics

Why do some people take the characters so seriously sometimes? by Big-Restaurant-2766

How does Spike bleach his hair if he can’t see his own reflection? by Spidergirlsheis

Say they never made the angel spin-off, you think they still would have made Anya cast? Or kept cordelia around as Xanders love interest? by The-Nerdy-Bisexual

What’s with Angel stalking every woman he likes (first time watcher) by WentOutOfBusiness

What happened to Spike's car? Maybe it was explained and i just forgot [...] by Krystal_Waters

Is there some reason why vampires have no reflection in a mirror? by Casaplaya5

[Sequel] Is anyone else annoyed by criticism over the new Buffy series already? by crystalyarn

What are your favourite looks for Buffy? I think season 4 and 6 were her best. by HomarEuropejski

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

Interview with The Master – Mark Metcalf Part 2 by Re-Vamped with Juliet Landau

What’s New in the Buffyverse: Breaking news! by Re-Vamped with Juliet Landau

CONVENTION: James Marsters GalaxyCon Oklahoma City 2025 Schedule by dontkillspike

PUBLICATION: Buffy the Vampire Slayer Revival: Everything to Know About Hulu's Potential New Series by Kelly Connolly, TV Guide

PUBLICATION: 8 Best Female Characters In Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Ranked by Amy Cowley, Game Rant

PUBLICATION: Buffy The Vampire Slayer Reboot Casts Ryan Kiera Armstrong by Scott Goldie, filmhoundsmag

PUBLICATION: 10 Gimmicky Buffy the Vampire Slayer Episodes Fans Still Love 22 Years Later by Emma Singer, CBR.com

PUBLICATION: Buffy star hints return will deliver on famous "promise" to fans: "It’s high time someone did" by Iona Rowan, Digital Spy

Submit a link to be included in the newsletter!

Join the editor team :)

[tiktaalic]

im moving to dfw from seattle this summer. impart your wisdom, if you would

It ROCKS to live in a real city. The factory in deep ellum in Dallas is a lovely little music venue. Denton’s a college town so it has a killer music scene. Bishop arts district was lovely when I was a kid idk how it looks in the last decade tho. Whataburger is Fine but the important thing is it’s open at 2 am when you’re drunk. The Fort Worth zoo is better than the Dallas zoo and it’s one of the best in the country. Carshon’s is an awesome Jewish cash only deli over by the zoo. Dallas has the biggest and first half price books store and across the street is a little family owned German restaurant where they play accordion on Friday/sat nights. I never kicked around in Dallas too much but Fort Worth has a pretty robust museum district. The Amon carter ROCKS it’s a free art museum with a bunch of classical exhibits and you only have to pay if you want to see some specific temporary installation. I saw Judith slaying holofernes there (not there anymore) it fucking rocks. Honestly I don’t find the stockyards that impressive I would just spend the $12 bucks on the cowgirl museum or some other western museum there are plenty. The perot is awesome and in Dallas. The stock show is fine it’s like any other little fair/carnival. Good way to kill a weekend if you need to kill a weekend. The state fair is crazy go see that thing. Oh there’s a beautiful on the water sculpture let me find it hold on. The fair park lagoon.

It of course goes without saying that you can’t throw a rock without hitting a restaurant that’ll blow your dick off. Ummmm. If you’re driving in Dallas. Stay safe out there. Anecdotally I’ve seen more drivers weave like assholes in the pnw but Dallas is sometimes a 90 mph minimum in the right lane kind of situation. BUGS ARE REAL ! You will hear cicadas for the first time in your life it’s a beautiful summer experience. Skeeter spray a must if you’re outside after like 5pm. There’ll be like PSAs on billboards or mailing adverts about How To Prevent Mosquitoes. Basically don’t have any standing water in your yard and you’re good. House geckos :-). If you’re in the city you don’t have to worry about ticks or snakes but they do exist and are something to be wary of if you’re ever called to tromp through the woods. You are going to find summers unbearable. Everybody’s gonna have AC you’ll be fine inside but you are going to complain about triple degree summers and how you can’t go outside. Nothing to do about that one except carry around 64 oz ice water to drink and pour on your head. Liquor laws are stricter which means no hard alcohol in gas stations / convenience stores / grocery stores you have to go to a liquor store. Also you can’t buy alcohol before noon on Sunday. Oh my god. The sun. You’re going to see the sun soooooo much. And there’ll be thunderstorms! Also Dallas Fort Worth Are two different cities 45 minutes apart that you have to drive through Other real cities to get to each other through. Seattle on the left DFW on the right. For comparison.

Also like. You know how the i5 corridor is like. Okay I’m driving through the woods for 3 hours and seeing a town every hour I can get gas 10 exits from now. Highways in texas between Dallas and Fort Worth are like ok I’m driving past flat yellow field and there’s a gas station at every exit for the next 30 exits. Different if you leave DFW! You can get empty field stretches coming in and out of houston and on your way to west texas and pretty much any drive longer than an hour that’s not. Straight from Dallas to Fort Worth. I loveeee the local public radio station. KXT I still listen to it in my car daily. Um. That’s my list of #cultural differences. And places to go 👍

[art-that-fucks-you-up-tournament]

ROUND TWO

Text form and links under read more

Just a reminder, these are one day polls!

SET 1

MATCH ONE: Lament for Icarus vs Untitled (the angel came to me in a fever hallucination, perched upon my bed as I returned from the bathroom)

MATCH TWO: Figures vs Hubble Deep Field

MATCH THREE: Bath Curtain vs Une Martyre

MATCH FOUR: Can't Help Myself vs Rape

SET 2

MATCH ONE: A Walk at Dusk vs Diary Page

MATCH TWO: Dead of Night vs Christina's World

MATCH THREE: Untitled (I’m Turning Into A Specter Before Your Very Eyes And I’m Going To Haunt You) vs Lustmord

MATCH FOUR: Untitiled (Zdzisław Beksiński) vs The Fallen Angel

SET 3

MATCH ONE: Device to Root Out Evil vs Fifty Days at Iliam: The Fire That Consumes All Before It

MATCH TWO: Exotic Bodies vs Doubting Thomas

MATCH THREE: Somebody Fell From Aloft vs Anguish

MATCH FOUR: Cat in Obsolete Bath vs Salvator Mundi (Saviour of the World)

SET 4

MATCH ONE: Symphony of the Sixth Blast Furnace vs Tarpaulin

MATCH TWO: Khajuraho Group of Monuments vs ปราสาทสัจธรรม (The Sanctuary of Truth)

MATCH THREE: The Weather vs The Daughters of Edward Darley Boit

MATCH FOUR: Statue of Vincent and Theo van Gogh vs Judith Slaying Holofernes

SET 5

MATCH ONE: Cueva de las Manos (Cave of Hands) vs Chauvet Cave Bear

MATCH TWO: Winged Victory of Samothrace vs Crouching Aphrodite

MATCH THREE: Kūya-Shonin vs Arena #7 (Bears)

MATCH FOUR: Enbu (炎舞) (Dancing in the Flames) vs Belfast to Byzantium

SET 6

MATCH ONE: The Kama Sutra of Vatsyayan vs Nighthawks

MATCH TWO: Electric Fan (Feel it Motherfuckers): Only Unclaimed Item from the Stephen Earabino Estate vs Forgotten Dreams

MATCH THREE: Pixeles (a group of 9 works) vs War Pieta

MATCH FOUR: Ajax and Cassandra vs Nāve (Death)

SET 7

MATCH ONE: Meeting on the Turret Stair vs Stańczyk

MATCH TWO: Closeness Lines Over Time vs The Maple Trees at Mama, the Tekona Shrine and Tsugihashi Bridge

MATCH THREE: Survival Series: In a Dream You Saw a Way vs The Kitchen Table Series

MATCH FOUR: In the Grip of Winter vs NAMES Project AIDS Memorial Quilt

SET 8

MATCH ONE: Blue Plate Special vs Mosque-Cathedral of Córdoba

MATCH TWO: Susanna and the Elders, Restored - X-Ray vs Moby Dick

MATCH THREE: how to look at art vs St. Sebastian

MATCH FOUR: Carroña vs The Dog

SET 9

MATCH ONE: David vs The Other Side

MATCH TWO: Starry Night vs Headress - Shadae

MATCH THREE: Woman with Dead Child (Frau mit totem Kind) vs Siroče na majčinom grobu (Orphan on Mother's Grave)

MATCH FOUR: Fighting Against SARS Memorial Architectural Scene (弘揚抗疫精神建築景觀) vs The Hull

SET 10

MATCH ONE: Worship vs Wheatfield with Crows

MATCH TWO: Study after Velázquez's Portrait of Pope Innocent X vs The Tragedy

MATCH THREE: Judith and the Head of Holofernes vs oh god i had a really big epiphany about love and personhood but i’m too drunk for words

MATCH FOUR: I am happy because everyone loves me vs Ivan the Terrible and His Son Ivan

SET 11

MATCH ONE: Water-Lilies, Reflection of a Weeping Willow vs The Grief of the Pasha

MATCH TWO: Passion vs Two Earthlings

MATCH THREE: Seer Bonnets vs Clytemnestra after the Murder

MATCH FOUR: “Untitled” (Perfect Lovers)/The Lovers (TIE) vs Kedai Ubat Jenun

SET 12

MATCH ONE: The Apotheosis of War vs Mouth

MATCH TWO: The Icebergs vs Maman

MATCH THREE: The Book of Kells Folio 188r: Luke carpet page vs Dome of the Rock mosaics

MATCH FOUR: Rowan Leaves and Hole vs Le Désespéré (The Desperate Man)

SET 13

MATCH ONE: Deimos vs Prudence

MATCH TWO: Siberian Ice Maiden shoulder tattoo vs Transi de René de Chalon (Cadaver Tomb of René of Chalon)

MATCH THREE: The Day vs Jatiya Sangsad Bhaban জাতীয় সংসদ ভবন (National Parliament House)

MATCH FOUR: Juventud de Baco (Bacchus Youth) vs Oath of the Horattii closeup

SET 14

MATCH ONE: St. Francis vs Thunder Raining Poison

MATCH TWO: Among the Waves vs Sagrada Família stained-glass windows

MATCH THREE: Noonday Heat vs Gielda Plakatu

MATCH FOUR: The Garden of Earthly Delights vs Kuoleman puutarha (The Garden of Death)

SET 15

MATCH ONE: da oracle vs Panel from Fun Home

MATCH TWO: La Mort de Marat (The Death of Marat) vs Düsseldorf 4 (Museum Kunst Palast)

MATCH THREE: Capriccio vs José y Maria

MATCH FOUR: Lágrimas De Sangre (Tears of Blood) vs Boy Staring at an Apparition

SET 16

MATCH ONE: The Gran Hotel Ciudad de México Art Nouveau interior vs Unfinished Painting

MATCH TWO: Memorial to a Marriage vs A Few Small Nips

MATCH THREE: Saturn Devouring His Son vs Lamentation over the Dead Christ

MATCH FOUR: Little Girl Looking Downstairs at Christmas Party vs Agnus

ROUND 3

SET 1

MATCH ONE: Lament for Icarus vs Hubble Deep Field

MATCH TWO: Bath Curtain vs Can't Help Myself

SET 2

MATCH ONE: Diary Page vs Dead of Night

MATCH TWO: Untitled (I’m Turning Into A Specter Before Your Very Eyes And I’m Going To Haunt You) vs Untitled (Zdzisław Beksiński)

SET 3

MATCH ONE: Fifty Days at Iliam: The Fire That Consumes All Before It vs Doubting Thomas

MATCH TWO: Anguish vs Salvator Mundi (Saviour of the World)

SET 4

MATCH ONE: Symphony of the Sixth Blast Furnace vs Khajuraho Group of Monuments

MATCH TWO: The Weather vs Judith Slaying Holofernes

SET 5

MATCH ONE: Cueva de las Manos (Cave of Hands) vs Winged Victory of Samothrace

MATCH TWO: Arena #7 (Bears) vs Belfast to Byzantium

SET 6

MATCH ONE: Nighthawks vs Electric Fan (Feel it Motherfuckers): Only Unclaimed Item from the Stephen Earabino Estate

MATCH TWO: Pixeles (a group of 9 works) vs Nāve (Death)

SET 7

MATCH ONE: Stańczyk vs Closeness Lines Over Time

MATCH TWO: The Kitchen Table Series vs NAMES Project AIDS Memorial Quilt

SET 8

MATCH ONE: Mosque-Cathedral of Córdoba vs Susanna and the Elders, Restored - X-Ray

MATCH TWO: how to look at art vs Carroña

SET 9

MATCH ONE: The Other Side vs Starry Night

MATCH TWO: Woman with Dead Child (Frau mit totem Kind) vs The Hull

SET 10

MATCH ONE: Wheatfield with Crows vs Study after Velázquez's Portrait of Pope Innocent X

MATCH TWO: oh god i had a really big epiphany about love and personhood but i’m too drunk for words vs Ivan the Terrible and His Son Ivan

SET 11

MATCH ONE: The Grief of the Pasha vs Two Earthlings

MATCH TWO: Clytemnestra after the Murder vs "Untitled" (Perfect Lovers) and The Lovers

SET 12

MATCH ONE: Mouth vs Maman

MATCH TWO: Dome of the Rock mosaics vs Le Désespéré (The Desperate Man)

SET 13

MATCH ONE: Deimos vs Siberian Ice Maiden shoulder tattoo

MATCH TWO: The Day vs Juventud de Baco (Bacchus Youth)

SET 14

MATCH ONE: Thunder Raining Poison vs Sagrada Família stained-glass windows

MATCH TWO: Noonday Heat vs Kuoleman puutarha (The Garden of Death)

SET 15

MATCH ONE: Panel from Fun Home vs Düsseldorf 4 (Museum Kunst Palast)

MATCH TWO: José y Maria vs Lágrimas De Sangre (Tears of Blood)

SET 16

MATCH ONE: Unfinished Painting vs Memorial to a Marriage

MATCH TWO: Saturn Devouring His Son vs Agnus

[uravitypng]

OMG. LANA. valentine’s day event !!?!?! pls for me? 💌

💌 cute little desc: enfj libra! annoying but in a very cute slay way maybe? loud, extroverted, loves loves loves yapping. the funniest person around probably. very flirty. enjoys being loved. LOVES being crushed on. little bit of a god complex rocking? eldest daughter stereotype to a t. super work driven, love love love to work. always busy, cannot function when i’m not busy. i enjoy video games and reading and napping and lazy days, which i know sounds like it contradicts the aforementioned always busy, but it doesn’t. and all while being just like… around people, not necessarily a lot of people or like doing anything w said people but just being in the presence of people.

💌 love of my life: nanami !!?!? (or, if u have better ideas for the following, you go for it too, but i’m on a real big nanami kick rn: ♡ bokuto ♡ atsumu ♡ toji)

UGH ANYWAYS. ily!!!! thanks in advance if u do mine??? ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ xoxoxox tori

𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐈…

are a married couple!

- you first met while you were working at the same company. - slight opposites attracts but not really ?? - gojo is a nuisance to him and has been since they first were introduced, when he found out about you and people said you were introverted and talkative like gojo he thought he wouldn't like you at first. he was obviously very wrong. at the beginning he tried to tell himself that he didn't have feelings for you and if he did they are purely physical but he knew he was lying to himself. - talking about gojo, nanami doesn't like gojo hanging around with you too much. he's not a jealous person and he doesn't have any doubts about your relationships but you're his wife and he feels like gojo tries to steal your attention. - he says your flirting doesn't affect him BUT it totally does. as soon as you're alone he's all over you. this man is about restraint but you definitely test it with your flirting. his face is completely stoic like normal until it's just the two of you and he's got his hands all over you. - as you like keeping busy and working hard kento makes sure that you don't overwork. he appreciates you're work driven, it's one of the things he really admires about you. he makes sure you look after yourself by not exhausting yourself by working too hard. nanami doesn't work overtime and he doesn't want you to come home after work feeling super tired and drained. - at first glance he doesn't look to be very sociable but you know he can be. - your humour together mixes really well often making each other laugh. nanami's quips and one liners told often with a straight face always makes you smile. - you're both readers! meaning that you'll both read a book in bed before going to sleep and you'll suggest each other books that you think the other will like and discuss them. even if nanami has no interest in the book you're currently reading he'll still listen to you talk about it and encourage you to tell him all about because he just loves hearing you talk about something you're passionate about. - kento loves a good lazy day together, especially after he's found work to be rather stressful in the week. nothing is better to him than staying at home with his wife having a lay in and then watching some tv or watch you play video games while he reads in the background. - he'll constantly call you his wife to people, 'my wife made it,' 'me and my wife went out to dinner last night' etc.

i really hope you like this tori!! i've never written for nanami before so i hope i did alright with your nanami kick atm!! ily2!! (don't tell anyone but even if my event was closed and i wasn't doing any more i'd still do one for you)♡♡♡♡♡

valentine's day event

[bishops-severed-torso]

You wanted the list so here it is, all the various horror related songs they've released thus far!

First, from their The Silver Scream album we have:

A Nightmare on Elm Street (The American Nightmare)

Friday the 13th (Thank God It's Friday)

Halloween (Stabbing in the Dark)

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (SAVAGES)

Saw (The Jig is Up)

The Crow (A Grave Mistake)

Jaws (Rocking the Boat)

The Shining (Enjoy Your Slay)

The Devil's Rejects (Freak Flag)

Edward Scissorhands (The World in My Hands)

Silent Night, Deadly Night (Merry Axe-mas)

An American Werewolf in London (Love Bites)

IT (IT is the End)

Scream (Your Number's Up)

Next from their The Silver Scream 2: Welcome to Horrorwood album:

Cabin Fever (A Rash Decision)

Child's Play (Assault and Batteries)

Psycho (The Shower Scene)

Pet Semetary (Funeral Derangements)

Resident Evil (Rainy Day)

American Psycho (Hip to be Scared)

My Bloody Valentine (Take Your Pick)

Hellraiser (The Box)

The Fly (F.L.Y.)

Hostel (Wurst Vacation)

The Evil Dead (Ex-Mørtis)

Candyman (Farewell II Flesh)

The Silence of the Lambs (Meat and Greet)

And while you're probably only interested in two or four of the songs from their first album where they started doing what they're known for now, Every Trick in the Book (inspired by various tragedy and horror literature), I'm gonna list them all anyways cause they're all complete bops and works of art (pun intended dhdjdkdhd):

Animal Farm (Nature of the Beast)

The Exorcist (Communion of the Cursed)

Dracula (Bloodbath & Beyond)

Alive: The Story of the Andes Survivors (The Plot Sickens)

Romeo and Juliet (Star-Crossed Enemies)

The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (Me, Myself & Hyde)

Go Ask Alice (Alice)

The Diary of a Young Girl (The People in the Attic)

Tess of the d'Ubervilles (Tess-Timoney)

Carrie (Hell in the Hallways)

And as a bonus song, this one is just a Stacey's Mom parody but I do think you would get a kick out of Jason's Mom which is in my view an absolutely hilarious parody cover that makes me giggle every time I hear it fhdjdkdkshd

I need to set up a movie marathon or something based on this

[totaldramamovies]

Total Drama Movies- Episode 1- “Lights, Camera, Chaos!”

Chris: Hello and welcome to the largest Total Drama season ever! We have 28 brand new contestants that will stir up more drama that any cast has before! These contestants will get into teams, and by the end of the episode, whichever team has lost the challenge, will be up for elimination! The team will vote someone out every episode, and this process will repeat till everyone but one is left, and they will win ONE. MILLION. DOLLARS! This competition will take place in a crummy old movie studio north of Toronto, and all of the challenges will be themed with their own genre! Well, we should probably move on and meet these 28 contestants! This is.. TOTAL! DRAMA! MOVIES!

*Cuts to ferry sailing to the movie studio*

Eliza: *Sewing dress* Hey, do you know when we will arrive? I need about 15 more minutes to finish my broadway dress!

Maxim: *Looks up from book he’s reading* Uh… I don’t think you’re gonna need a broadway dress… It’s a film lot, not a theatre.

Eliza: Eh, whatever…

Bailey: Did you know I made the first ever dress?!! I also went to Mars and met aliens, and I hold world record for eating the most cellphones-

Eliza & Maxim: We don’t care!

*Pauline notices Wyatt with Nintendo Switch*

Pauline: Oh, you play video games too?

Wyatt: Yea😎😎😎😎 im kinda epic lolz😎😤😂💪💪 im soooo MLG 😂😂👌🔥

Pauline: Oh..!

*Camera pans to more contestants*

William: Hey! What’s happening?

*Awkward Silence*

Cece: I don’t want, nor care enough to talk to you.. Lemme just get this straight, if you haven’t been on atleast 10 Disney Cruises and ridden in a Lamborghini, I do NOT want to talk to you, kay? 

Ines: *Amused* Heh, classic rich girl.. 

Jamil: Yep. Hey, if we’re on same teams, you wanna become an alliance?

Ines:  Yeah sure! We’re both pretty strong! Were you in the military?

Jamil: Not yet, still in training, but I’m almost ready!

*Camera pans again*

Dwaeji: Ohayo..!! ^o^ Im so sugoiii! Nya >w<!!

Andres: No way 💀💀

Dwaeji: Konnichiwa!! Onionhaseyo 🥺🥺!! U support RCTA??

Andres: No.. get out of here!

Eddy: Erm.. ya.. according to my calculations, “Dwaeji” means pig in Korean.. It’s clear you didn’t do you’re research.. ☝️🤓

Rajiv: Hahah, you’re name is “pig”? Nice. *High fives Eddy*

Dwaeji: Ok fine Eddy-san and Rajiv-kun.. my real name is Emily.. but don’t tell anyone, you bakas.. 😔😔 UnU

Dennis: *sighs* This trip is taking forever..

Tamia: I know, right? It’s nice to have someone like you on the ride.

Dennis: Yeah, I guess you’re right. 2 pessimists are better than one.

Dominique: *Excitedly* Oh come on, it’s not that bad! *shouts* Hey everyone! How are you guys!

Francesca: *Happily* Good, I guess.

Boris: Meh, I’m bored.

Kenny: *Staring at Dominique*

Dominique: What?

Kenny: Hey.. you wanna maybe.. uh.. go out some time? 😏

Dominique: *Concerned* Uh… *awkward laugh* How are YOU guys!

Fredrick: Um.. I have to address YOU first. 🍷🗿 NOBODY talks up to the sigma. 🍷🍷🗿🗿🗿🗿 Where’s the buffet?

Dominique: um.. Why is everyone here so wierd..

Leopold: *Picking nose* I know, right?

*Camera moves on once again*

Francesca: Okay! I think I’m ready for this! I got this!

Fangxiu: Girl yes 🥰 Get ready to slay this competition away 😍

Francesca: Um, okay?

Charlotte: Don’t worry, darling, half these contestants look like they can’t count past 5. 

Taniyah: Girl, they don’t look that dumb..

Pietro: HEY! That’s not true! One! Two! Three! Four! uh.. Five! uh… um.. ah, crap..

Roman: Hah! Bro, you’re stupid, I could count to six!

Pierro: Oh yeah? Prove it.

Roman: You’re on bro!

Taniyah: *Looks at Charlotte* Alright, guess I was too nice.

Sigita: Hey, you guys ready to lose for me? 

*Everyone stops*

Dominique: Oh my god, you’re so pretty!! How do you get your hair that silky?!

Sigita: I don’t know, I might just be effortlessly beautiful.

Grace: Hey! I’m better though! Look at how preppy I am!

*Everyone ignores*

Grace: HEY! LOOK AT MY PREPPYNESS!! 😡

*The boat starts rocking a lot*

Boris: Hey, uh.. Is it just me or did this boat get faster?

*Cuts to captain’s headquarters, an intern is driving the ferry*

Intern: Heh, time to give them a small surprise!

*Ferry crashes into rocks, and the boat shakes*

Dominique: What was that?!

Fredrick: Crap, that was me. But I won’t say sorry since I’m sigma and saying sorry is such a beta move 🍷🗿

Eliza: *Sniffs* Oh god!

*Water enters the room the contestants are in*

Rajiv: Aww man!

Pietro: THE SHIPS SINKING!!

*Everyone jumps off the ferry before its goes underwater*

Dennis: *Quietly* Oh no.. We’re soaked..

Chris: *through megaphone* HEY CONTESTANTS! SWIM TO THE STUDIO NOW! THEN WE WILL HAVE THE FIRST CHALLENGE!

Roman: *Annoyed* Dude.. Really? Right Now!

*Up on dock where Chris is*

Jamil & Ines: We’re first!

Chris: Jamil! Ines! How’s it going?

Ines: This was lightwork!

Jamil! Yeah, swimming was basic training!

Chris: Haha, I wonder if you’ll call the CHALLENGES “lightwork”.

*Boris swims up next*

Chris: Next up is our strongman, Boris!

Boris: Hey, Chris. Is this the place.? Hoping it would be nicer..

Chris: Up next.. The track star, Leopold!

Leopold: Hey chris.

Chris: Model, Sigita!

Sigita: Hey!

Chris: Bad Boy, Andres!

Andres: Yo.

Chris: Pietro & Roman!

Pietro & Roman: Heyy!

Chris: Popular Girl, Cece!

Cece: Ugh..

Chris: Calm Stoic Sweetheart, Charlotte!

Charlotte: Hello.

Chris: Taniyah!

Taniyah: Wasgood, yall?

Chris: Gamer girl, Pauline!

Pauline: Hey Chris!

Chris: Epic Gamer, Wyatt!

Wyatt: Yooo!

Chris: Dominique, Dennis, Tamia, and Kenny!

Dominique: Hello World! :D

Dennis: *Sigh*

Tamia: Hey..

Kenny: I love yall!

Chris: Rajiv & Francesca!

Rajiv: Whats up, dudes!

Francesca: Hey everyone!!

Chris: William & Fangxiu!

William: Hey..?

Fangxiu: IM USING MY ROSE T- 😍

Chris: Maxim, Eliza, and Grace!

Maxim: Hey chris!

Eliza: Same as Maxim!

Grace: It’s so preppy in here!! >o<

Chris: Dwaeji..?

Dwaeji: Ohayo 🥺🥺

Chris: Bailey!

Bailey: I already have a million dollars!

Chris: and.. Eddy!

Eddy: Salutations!

Chris: And that makes… 27? We still have one more person..

*3 Hours Later*

Fredrick: *Slowly doggy paddles to the dock and gets up onto dock finally, breathing heavily* 

Chris: Dude.. you took 3 hours..? To swim 40 feet?

Fredrick: Uh.. I d-did that on p-purpose?? Heheh..?🍷🗿

Jamil: That was sad..

Chris: Anyway, it’s time for you’re first challenge!

Leopold: Don’t we need teams?

Chris: I was getting to that.. The first team WILL be to get into teams! Whichever team takes the longest to create will be up for elimination. Anyway, Get into 4 teams of 7!

Dennis: Tamia, you wanna join become teams?

Tamia: Yeah, Pauline, you wanna join too?

Pauline: Ok!

Ines: Jamil! Since we are creating our own teams, lets be a team!

Jamil: *Flexing Muscles* Yes! We’ll be the strongest team ever!

Dominique: *Looking at Eddy* Eddy, what’s wrong?

Eddy: Erm.. I think I have a bit of a crush on Sigita..

Dominique: Well, why not join teams with her? I can come along with you if you want!

Eddy: Um, ok! Hey Sigita, you wanna be teammates with me and Dominique?

Sigita: Alright, sure I guess..

Dominique: *to Eddy* You did it! Now that she’s on your team, you might have a chance!

Francesca: Hey, Charlotte, you wanna be teammates?

Charlotte: Yes, my darling! How about Taniyah?

Taniyah: Alright!

Fangxiu: CAN I CVME TOO 😍💅

Charlotte: Alright..

Maxim: Hey Eliza, you wanna become teammates?

Eliza: Sure!

Bailey: I’m classified the best teammate ever by 37 of the top 50 universities in the country so I’m joining you two!

Ines: Anyone else wanna join me and Jamil?

Grace: I’ll make this team 200% more preppy!

William: Uh.. I’ll join I guess?

Jamil: Ah, I think we just made the team worse. Eh, Wanna join up with Bailey, Eliza, and Maxim so we have a full team of 7? Eliza and Maxim seem smart, we might need some smarts to balance out Grace and William.

Ines: Keh, sure.

Chris: And the first of four teams are created!

Boris: Hey, Pietro & Roman, you 2 guys seem pretty strong, wanna join me?

Pietro: Sure Dude!!

Roman: Alright Nicee!!

Andres: Yo can I join?

Boris: Sure, you seem competitive! Let’s join Pauline, Dennis and Tamia so we have a full team.

Charlotte: Hmm.. the last ten people look rather horrible.

Taniyah: Now hold on, Leopold is a track runner so hes fast, and Cece is a snobby white girl but she finna be an even bigger pain if she’s on another team, so we can take in those two!

Leopold: Alright!

Cece: Fine, whatever.

Kenny: Hey, Rajiv dude, you wanna join Dominique?

Rajiv: Sure!!

Dominique: Alright, the last 3, Wyatt, Sigma, and Koreaboo. Let’s get Wyatt since he is good with strategy since he’s gamer and.. uh..

Wyatt: Lesgo!!

Leopold: We gotta get one last person for full team!

Taniyah: He’s Right, we gotta get one of the worst two..

Leopold: Uh.. Fredrick!

Cece: *extremely mad* UGH.. WHY?!

Leopold: At least he isn’t as bad as koreaboo Dwaeji!!

Cece: You know what, he just might be..

Chris: Alright! That means Dwaeji will join the losing team! Here are the four teams…

Ines & Jamil’s Team: Bailey, Eliza, Grace, Ines, Jamil, Maxim and William.

Boris’s Team: Andres, Boris, Dennis, Pauline, Pietro, Roman and Tamia.

Charlotte’s Team: Cece, Charlotte, Fangxiu, Francesca, Fredrick, Leopold and Taniyah.

Eddy’s Team: Dominique, Dwaeji, Eddy, Kenny, Rajiv, Sigita, and Wyatt.

Chris: Now, what will these four teams be named?

Andres: the Dead Bodies!!

Grace: Preppy Squad!!! >o<

Fangxiu: the Haunted Poosay-😍😍

Chris: THAT IS ENOUGH! I’ll give you team names!

Andres, Boris, Dennis, Pauline, Pietro, Roman and Tamia, you will be the Mighty Wizards!

*Cheering and Yelling from Team*

Bailey, Eliza, Grace, Ines, Jamil, Maxim and William, you will be the Ferocious Monsters!

*Cheering and Yelling from Team*

Cece, Charlotte, Fangxiu, Francesca, Fredrick, Leopold and Taniyah, you will be the Fearless Warriors!

*Cheering and Yelling from Team*

and since Dominique, Dwaeji, Eddy, Kenny, Rajiv, Sigita, and Wyatt are losing, they’ll be uh.. 4th Thing!!

*Annoyance and confusion*

Chris: Alright, I’ll see you tonight at the arena of losers! In the mean time, I’ll tell you where you guys will sleep!

*The group walks over to 4 run-down campers*

Andres: Eugh.. is this where we are sleeping?!

Grace: Soooo not preppy.. >:(

Chris: Hahah, yep. Don’t worry, the guys and girls get their own rooms, however the campers weren’t originally meant to be split into 2 rooms, so It will be REALLY cramped! 

Eddy: Erm.. actually if they were split in half but still stay the same size-

Chris: I DON’T CARE. Anyway, Get some rest before the elimination ceremony tonight, 4th Thing!

Sigita: God, I can’t believe we’re named that..

(It’s night time now, elimination ceremony takes place up on stage, the 7 are sitting in chairs next to chris, while the 3 other teams watch from the audience. The seven up for elimination are:

Dominique, the Social Butterfly,

Dwaeji, the Asiaboo,

Eddy, the Nerdy Band Kid,

Kenny, the Trashy Simp,

Rajiv, the Chill Guy,

Sigita, the Model, and

Wyatt, the Epic Gamer)

Chris: 4th Thing, you’re off to a bad start! Half the team is joke characters!

Wyatt: OH COME ON!

Dwaeji: So not sugoi.. 🥺

Chris: Okay, the votes from you seven have been submitted! If you’re safe, I’ll call your name and give you will get a famous “Golden Chris Award”! The first one safe is..

SIGITA!

*Sigita grabs her award*

DOMINIQUE!

*Dominique sighs of relief*

RAJIV!

Rajiv: Nicee.!

EDDY!

*Eddy does that stupid take the L dance from fortnite to impress Sigita*

KENNY!

Kenny: Aww yeah!!

Chris: the last two without an award. Wyatt and Dwaeji. Wh-

Wyatt: Wait.. we are both safe? Awesomesauce 🤑🤑

Chris: What are you talking about?

Dwaeji: You said both of our names.

Chris: PRETEND I DIDN’T SAY THAT! The one going home tonight is…

*Wyatt sweats mountain dew*

*Dwaeji sweats Jungkook’s tears*

Chris: Dwaeji. Wyatt, you’re here for another night. Seeya Dwaeji! Or should I say, Emily..

Dwaeji: WAIT.. you KNOW?! NOOOO.. nya.. 😖😖 Heh.. I guess I deserve it..:)

Dominique: Sorry Dwaeji, you’re just so.. uh.. enthusiastic.!!

Dwaeji: Whatever! I don’t need you! I don’t need a million dollars! I have my Bakugo body pillow 🥺🥺..

Chris: Well, you might be wondering how you’ll get home, I have..

*A giant robot with a giant hand slides up on a track*

Chris: We have a giant mechanical Will Smith that will slap you home! Have fun!

Dwaeji: Wait.. what?

*The robot starts charging towards Dwaeji, the arm stretching back before rocketing forward*

Eddy: Oh god.. This looks a bit hardcore, doesn’t it?

Chris: Nah.. I don’t think so..

Will Smith Robot: KEEEEEP. MY WIIIIFE’S. NAAAME. OUUUTCHA. FREEEAKING. MOUUTH!!!

*The hand slaps Dwaeji and she goes flying*

Dwaeji: AHHHHH!!

Chris: Haha, good riddance. Welp, there’s 27 left! Who will leave next? I guess we’ll see next time on.. TOTAL! DRAMA! MOVIES!

——————————————————————————————————

Hey everyone! This was the first part to my Total Drama fanseason. It’s definitely interesting.? I’m thinking that if this project get enough support, I’ll let the viewers vote in comments instead of the contestants. If you want that to happen, you could follow, comment, or even just like! I’m not asking for much either, just a few supporting and consistent commenters, I’ll start viewer voting! Anyway, I’ll see you tomorrow for the next episode!

[dangerous-realms]

Well, that wasn't a question she had expected, especially so soon. It was something she should expect from someone from a universe with Destroyers, she didn't have a few things the others did have.

"Well, you shouldn't judge a book by the rest of the genre. My son can't cook for the life of him despite me and his father teaching him how the best we could, the there's the destroyer god and his twin creation goddess sister from my generation who's to lazy to cook and has their caretaker angel do all the running around, there are plenty of gods who know how to cook or learned how to do such for various reasons."

She pitied her grandchildren who had grew up with just him as a parent and had to eat his... abominable cooking. She was amazed that he could stomach it, but it would explain as to why he was capable of eating pretty much everything. She had no idea that she had bore a child who would be a precursor to an entirely new race of beings when he was first born, but such became obvious as he grew.

"It's fine. If anything, how you've been acting has been giving me insight to how the destroyers where you're from behave."

She says before going and sitting on a nicely sized rock she left behind agter seeing his shocked face out of the corner of her eye, crossing her legs as the look on her face indicates that she s going to tell a story.

"Well, I hope you don't think differently after I tell you what I did in my younger years. A long time ago, when there were twenty-one universes. The former ruler of all, Teth, created an amalgamation who's soul purpose was to be that of a destroyer for the twenty first universe known as Okanara. That amalgamation was created with the genetics of a being of creation, a dead being of destruction, tye genetics of an extinct warrior race of fire demons who were killed by the goddess of death who lost her mind."

She starts, he may as have a baseline for what exactly she is. She wasn't born the normal way but rather created into existence, and it was always a gamble how a being made such a way would turn out.

"The little girl he had created was one who grew up having the bate hungry desire if the warrior race that made part of her, as such she searched for opponents to fight, strong ones at that. She took thrill in those who were the strongest, laying waste to one planet after another with this thirst for battle, blood, and destruction controlling her. Until one day she did meet someone stronger then her, a man created for the same purpose as her, to be a destroyer. So, a battle waged on for one thousand years between the two until nothing was left and both were laying exhausted on the ground."

It was quite a long story, so she was only going to say the important parts of course. After all, the meat seemed to nearly be done. Though there was more, of course.

"The two would part ways to lick there wounds, unbeknownst to both that they had laid waste to the entirely of their universe. The baren universe was something the caretaker angel, caretaker angel in training, god of creation, and goddess of Creation in training weren't to thrilled. So they encountered the newly recovered battle hungry destruction goddess with the intent bid farewell to her in the form of a battle, unaware of how it would go."

Her tone, different from before as she reaches the climax of the brief story of why she changed. He deserved to hear it as it as clear that he didn't have a taste for Destroyers in the first place. She had a feeling that it was likely he was from a universe where his destroyer was likely a liar, so she thought good to be truthful.

"Despite the older caretake angel and creation god being much more skilled then the young destruction goddess, she stilled managed to slay them. Bringing all four to their end in an arduous battle that left the Universe known as the Okanara universe at its end despite being the youngest universe. However, the Ruler of all, Teth, found both his creations much to valuable to be erased, so both were sent to the voidial prison for millions of years until he saw that they had grown out of their ways and released them on opposite sides of the multiverse to avoid another incident."

As she was telling the story, her hands were of course doing gestures. But now that they were done, she would fold then in her lap and look intently at the saiayn to see his reaction. Wondering what he would think of her.

"So, what do you think of me now that you know that portion of my past, Kefla?"

In his universe, there was not a destroyer worthy of the title. Lazy or incompetent, that was what they were. Mortals were just plaything to them. There was not a god to be spared within his multiverse, but to do so. The level of power he required was not close to anything he had at the moment. A few were beings as told as time itself. To muster the power to kill them all. It would take more than thirty years, and unfortunately, he could not access the divine source of energy like the other saiyan could. They made such an impressive jump in power just by getting access to it, and he could not even do so. It was annoying, but there was no point in being furious about it. There was one mortal that gained power far greater than the god of destruction of his universe. So, even without divine energy, it was not impossible.

— And what exactly happened for you to change? Destroyers are the most arrogant and hard-headed gods. Never once admitting to having screwed up. Frankly, I never thought I'd hear such words from one.

Barely any gods he had the chance to be around of cooked for themselves. They had people do such for themselves, but they were never the one in the kitchen. It was because of that, he was surprised she could cook. Then again, he should have noticed that quicker, as he had never seen an angel attendant around her like Champa with Vados.

— I don't remember god being interested in knowing how to cook. Most would call it disgraceful. So, yes. I never expected you to be willing to help me.

Unfortunately, he was judging the woman based on how the gods of the multiverse he was a part of were. They were assholes. But she had been nothing but nice to him after that little encounter they had. She was undeserving of such a treatment.

— I apologize for treating you like this. I barely know anything about you, and I'd love to know more.

Shock stretched his face as she uttered that she really only had one child. Despite seemingly having tried many times to have many kids. As it was a situation he never had to deal with, he just kept quiet and pulled the meat outside the fire to judge if they were good enough. A few more minutes into it and it should be good.

[astonmartinii]

Hi, love your work. Could you please write a Lando Norris x engineer!reader thank you 🥰

team bonding | lando norris social media au

pairing: lando norris x engineer!reader

people start to notice the chemistry between lando and his race engineer

yourusername

liked by landonorris, danielricciardo and 11,067 others

tagged: yourbff

yourusername: life between races ✨

view all comments

lilaclando part time race enginner full time mother

landonorris so where was my karaoke invite?

yourusername you'd really come all the way from monaco to do karaoke with my uni friends ???

landonorris duh

mclarenlover he's so in love you can't tell me otherwise

oscarpiastri the real question is what song did you sing?

yourusername man i feel like a women obviously

oscarpiastri taste as always

landonorris

liked by yourusername, estebanocon and 601,843 others

landonorris: what happens at the monaco after party stays at the monaco after party

view all comments

babynorris i did not know lando was friends with mick and este but i am living for this

estebanocon the best nights are the ones you don't remember

mickschumacher where is dj lando?

lando4ever are we all just collectively ignoring the girl in the last slide?

leclerc16x call me delusional but that looks like his race engineer

landonorizzzzz ur delusional (i hope you're right)

f1wagsupdates

liked by lando4ever, lilacleclerc and 1,304 others

tagged: yourusername

f1wagsupdates: in his most recent post lando norris included a picture of a girl many believe to be his race engineer y/n y/ln. she's worked with lando for just over a year and are a beloved duo in f1, with their radio conversations being a huge source of entertainment. what do you think of this potential couple: cute or unprofessional?

view all comments

babygirllando i think it would be cute... i mean we've all heard the radios... the one when lando crashed... she was so stressed

maxyverstappen i mean that's kinda her job?

kittyrussell as much as i would love this couple, they work together like HR violation ???

norrisszn maybe the issue here is y'all assuming everything all the time ? they're clearly friends? i didn't know you couldn't party with your friends

LN4 literally people assume shit every time and cause the issues

f1

liked by danielricciardo, maxverstappen1 and 421,077 others

tagged: landonorris

f1: lando norris is back on the podium in austria after some quick thinking from his race engineer y/n y/ln helped the brit undercut the alpines to take third!

view all comments

landonorris your fave duo tearing it up

yourusername we slayed 💅

glitterlando I DON'T CARE WHAT THAT RAT STEINER SAYS THEY’RE CUTE AND PROFESSIONAL

planetdannyric this is what you get steiner - double haas dnf and y/n being a big component of lando's podium KARMA

danielricciardo team work makes the dream work !! happy for you two 🏆

hugsforlando danny being a landoy/n shipper so true of him

landonorris

liked by danielricciardo, yourusername and 531,778 others

tagged: yourusername

landonorris: after the last couple weeks, y/n has been subject to the most ridiculous and disgusting ridicule from people from within our own sport. y/n y/ln is one of the most talented individuals in f1 and i am forever grateful that she is on my team! i think we all saw how important she is to my success, so appreciation post for my rock! x

view all comments

howdyricciardo god they are so cute whether they're a couple or just friends

yourusername awwww thank you lando i don't care what they say we continue to slay

landonorris lets fucking go

flowersforlando i need this couple to happen fuck steiner

smoooooothoperator no cause power couple for real

yourusername

liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and 49,671 others

yourusername: don't let any man tell you that you can't do it

p.s. slagging off your drivers in your book and on national television is more unprofessional than anything i could ever do

view all comments

mickschumacher ❤️

danielricciardo as the children say - mother

landonorris forever proud of you y/n

yourusername thank you landinho

maxverstappen1 let's gooooooooo

carlossainz55 tell them !!

landonorris

liked by carlossainz55, alexalbon and 772,109 others

tagged: yourusername

landonorris: what if i told you i don't care, our team chemistry is unmatched

view all comments

yourusername not exactly how i thought we were going to do this but i love you silly ❤️

landonorris i love you more

danielricciardo so it is true !!! was about to ask you if you finally grew some balls and asked

landonorris dude don't out me on main

lewishamilton so so happy for you guys !!

yoursricciardo omg parents

lovelylando they make me believe in love for real

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, maxverstappen1 and 71,209 others

tagged: landonorris

yourusername: i'd take all the shit in the world to stay with you ❤️

p.s. let's get that win baby

view all comments

violetleclerc i will be seated for lando's maiden win and y/n excellence

landonorris i love you so much (and the win is coming, i can feel it)

yourusername you'll get what you deserve in due time

maxverstappen1 does the camera man not get a shout out?

yourusername thank you for being our personal photographer, not my fault you tackle my phone out of my hands whenever i try to take a pic of you :/

note: hope you enjoyed, i'm finally getting through the requests !! xx

[llycaons]

Ep1: wuji still fucking slays

I've watched some parts of this show more often than other parts, but I would estimate this is my...fourth or fifth rewatch, it has been a solid two years

god I forgot how long the op is. unlike netflix, viki doesn't have a 'skip intro' option

SECT LEADERS YAO AND OUYANG APPEAR BEFORE ANY OTHER NAMED CHARACTER BESIDES WWX. SCREAM

read in a joke yaoyang fic once that they did attack each other during that fight but I assumed the fic author made it up

editing is really overwrought, especially in this first ep. far too many fast zooms imo. seems clumsy and juvenile, tho I know a lot of editing on this show is really good. sets and music and (eventual) character work more than make up for it

don't really like this first ep tbh.

subtitles are WAY different than netflix's. I can hardly follow what the characters are saying sometimes

wwx's voice is way deeper than I remember, too

this confused me so bad but it's nice to have a reminder that wwx IS in his og body, but mxy always concealed his face so the mos don't actually know what he looks like and so wwx showing up to replace him doesn't seem weird to them. they must have been very similar in height, build, skin tone, etc. lucky coincidence

wwx looks so handsome in those beige robes gotta say

he mentions that peanuts and wine both don't taste as good as they used to, which is a curious addition that I assume is temporary because he doesn't mention it again. and because he's chugging that emperor's smile later like it's the only solace in this cold harsh world

WUJI!!!! the emotions I felt when it started during the first flashback to lwj....GOD what a fucking good song. all the music in this show is good but wuji is just hitting it out of the park. ACHING yearning. HIGH romance. POWERFUL pathos.

oh shit ding and tong were sweethearts in the book but I forgot they were also in the show, tho only briefly

this was also in the book. they have protective sigils sewn into their robes, which is implied here but I guess I missed it when I watched it the first few times. honestly a lot of this is still quite confusing to me

you know I give lsz a lot of crap for being so boring but it was genuinely very nice to see him be like 'please respect disabled people and be kind to them and believe them when they make accusations against people more powerful than them' bc wwx does a similar thing in the next episode and I feel like it's one of those things that gets swept under the rug amidst the louder themes of the story but besides just being a 'good' and polite boy he genuinely does care about and advocate for people who are denigrated and mistreated by the more powerful figures in their society

is it just me or is this shot kind of horny

wwx's reaction to lwj actually does make sense to me because he's still clearly mooning over him but he also can't trust that lwj will be on his side considering that in the past he kind of wasn't and wwx is probably still a bit paranoid and mistrustful so it makes sense? he's very sad about like. being reminded of him + knowing what he can't have and also is kind of freaked out at the idea of seeing him again

I FORGOT THEIR MONEY IS CHUNKS OF SPRAYPAINTED ROCK AND STARTED LAUGHING OUT LOUD. I LOVE THIS SHOW

EYYYY LITTLE APPLE!!!!!!!!!!!! I fucking love little apple bro

THERE HE IS!!!!!!!!!!! RED AND BLACK LEGEND IS BACK!!!!

Personal highlights: ep1

wwx going 'lan zhan' all heartfelt and gutted when playing wuji on the piece of grass

sexy lwj hand shot

the way that money looks

[patt-writes-stuff]

Beach Days with The Genshin Characters!

Wc: 1.7k+

Type: Headcanons

CW: umm nothing except mentions of alcohol and maybe people being creeps? (None of the chars or you tho it’s very brief)

A/N: HI IM BACK FROM THE DEAD! These were supposed to be a lot shorter but I got too excited. If you by any chance wanna see some for your fav character lmk! I know it says request are closed in my bio but since it’s just hcs it’s a lot less (and I really enjoyed writing these so ajdhdhdk)

🔥Diluc:

This man cannot swim. Tell me otherwise, I dare you.

Kaeya tried to jokingly push him off a lil diving cliff area when they were kids.

He almost drowned. Kaeya was in a lot of trouble.

So, good luck getting this man to actually get in the water. The most he’ll do is sit on the shore where it’s very shallow.

He usually prefers to just stay under an umbrella on the sand and keep an eye on you.

Calls you every two hours in advance and helps you reapply sunscreen.

He’s very pale so I feel like he burns pretty easily, meaning he needs to reapply super frequently otherwise he will become a tomato. He brings like three bottles of the good shit. Tch, rich boy.

If you ask him to build a sandcastle, he will pretend to be annoyed but do it anyways. Ends up finding it kind of enjoyable.

He has the maids prepare a nice picnic basket for the two of you!! It’s got all your favorite foods plus grape juice cuz y’know.

If any creepy peeps approach you, don’t worry. He brought his vision and his claymore.

Of course, he won’t have to resort to such violent lengths. Everyone in Mondstadt knows who Diluc is and they probably know you’re his s/o, so they’re usually smart enough to mind their own business.

If they don’t, don’t worry. Diluc’s glare is more than enough to scare them away.

All in all I definitely recommend a beach day with him! I’ll give it a solid 8/10 (-2 for not wearing floaties and getting in the water with you or letting you teach him how to swim.

🖌Albedo:

You guys definitely 100% take Klee out with you on a beach day.

You guys bring snacks, beach toys like buckets and shovels for optimal sandcastle building, a picnic blanket, etc.

Jean definitely packs a lot more stuff for you guys to take with you than you actually need.

It’s only cuz she’s worried for Klee and is nervous about not being able to go with you guys though! It’s very sweet really.

Klee tries to bomb the fish and cause havoc at the beach 😭

I think Albedo is a good swimmer and gets in with you and Klee so that he can help her (which is very cute omfg)

He’s set total workaholic, as we know, so it took a lot of convincing to get him to put down his experiments and accompany you to the beach (however, he’s particularly weak to yours and klee’s puppy dog eyes so he caved eventually)

Though, looking at you and Klee happily building sandcastles and decorating them with pretty seashells of all shapes and colors, he can’t really find it in himself to complain.

He, of course, takes this opportunity to take out his sketchbook and draw the waves, seagulls, you… Of course he won’t let you see the sketch book no sir. He’s a bit embarrassed to be honest, but an artist such as himself recognizes beauty when he sees it so he simply had to draw you. (God I love him so much)

If a creepy person approaches you,- well don’t worry. The sight of a small arsonist child blowing up fish is enough to scare them away 🥰

At the end of the day, all three of you are all ticketed out. Albedo has to carry Klee back to Mondstadt because the poor baby fell asleep the moment you started drying her hair with the beach towel. You’re, of course, carrying back Dodoco and your bags. (You also manage to sneak a peak at Albedo’s sketchbook and find some very pretty drawings of you and Klee with your sandcastle)

At the end of the day, you guys tuck Klee in and read her a bedtime story (she woke up and insisted). Afterwards Albedo takes you back home and thanks you for coming with you and Klee (which you ofc say wasn’t a problem because how could you not???)

All in all? I’ll give it a solid 10/10. You’ve got tasty food, fun times, your boyfriend and his cute kid adoptive sister (yes I am very biased idc)

🦋Xiao:

I think it would take a lot of convincing to get Xiao to go out on a beach date with you.

He’ll probably see it as a distraction getting in the way of his slaying of monsters and demons.

However, he also worships the grounds you walk on (hehe, simp XD), so I don’t think it’ll take that much convincing on your part (especially because it’s is self appointed duty to keep you safe so if you insist on going with or without him, he supposes he’ll have to go)

Is definitely a bit tense at first. He doesn’t know how to let loose and chill so while you’re sun tanning on a beach chair he’s like 🧍‍♂️ahdgshjsjd

Eventually calms down a bit though! You get him to relax and eat some almond tofu you brought along with you. It definitely gets him to perk up.

I don’t think he would mind getting into the water but I do think he’d rather walk along the shore and collect pretty seashells and sea glass.

He later gives the ones he deems pretties to you (he hands them over to you with a blush on his face and pretends it’s not a big deal and he definitely gets all pouty and grouchy when you coo at how adorable he is)

As for creeps, Xiao is both intimidating and well known in Liyue. No one is brave enough (or, let’s be honest, dumb enough) to approach you with any bad intentions.

Sure, Xiao has sworn never to harm a human/citizen of Liyue but that doesn’t mean he can’t scare the absolute shit out of them.

I think Xiao would definitely enjoy a beach day 🥺🥺. He’d find it very relaxing to go out with you and just hear the sound of waves and feel the sand under his feet.

He’d definitely hint at wanting to do it again later. Of course, he won’t tell you. No, that’s a foolish mortal activity and he has much better things to do.

Wait no, don't turn around, yes he will go with you next month.

All in all, I give Xiao a 9/10. It’s a very relaxing day (which he deserves 😤). And you get to see a whole new side of him.

💎Ningguang:

OK SO ORIGINALLY I WASN'T GONNA WRITE ONE FOR HER (at least not in this post) BUT THEN I THOUGHT OF LADY NINGGUANG TAKING YOU TO A WHOLE ASS PRIVATE BEACH

She knows you don’t care about how exclusive the beach you go to is (in fact, the fact that you don’t care about where you are or what you do is one of the things that make her fall more and more madly in love with you) but you deserve the best so she’s gonna go all out.

She’s a busy lady so days like this where the two of you get to go somewhere and be together are few and far between.

She knows it’s hard to be in a relationship with someone who is busy 24/7, so she appreciates how you remain by her side despite all hardships. (Y’all are a whole ass power couple istg)

The two of you spend your day relaxing. Sun bathing, drinking piña coladas, maybe taking a dip in the ocean. It’s all very pleasant!

Ningguang doesn’t quite feel like the type of person who would sit in the sand and make sandcastle, however you’re more than welcome to make some yourself. She finds it endearing <3

If you insist on her helping, she’ll eventually comply. She loves you too much to say no. I feel like she’ll either be terrible at it or like a total architect.

Sand is technically like tiny rocks right? So maybe she can use her vision to help her? If that’s the case, she’s making a replica of the Jade chamber out of sand.

If any creepy person comes up to you don’t worry. Ningguang will buy the whole beach and then use her right of admission as owner to permanently ban them from the beach you’re at.

The only downside to a day at the beach with Ningguang might be that there’s a big chance she’ll be called to tend urgent matters, seeing as she is the Tianquan of the Liyue Qixing and all.

If that does happen, she’ll be sure to make it up to you somehow, whether it be rescheduling or taking care of the matter as soon as possible so that the two of you can get back to your day of relaxation and fun.

All in all?? Lady Ningguang will treat you like total royalty and the two of you will have an amazing time! I give her an 11/10 (she would literally buy a whole beach for you to be comfortable I mean c’mon)

🍃Venti:

BEACH DAYS WITH HIM ARE SO FUN!!

Swimming? Yeah, he’d love to! Sunbathing? Sure! He’ll ever conjure up a light breeze for the two of you. Sandcastle building? WELL OF COURSE WHY DO YOU THING HE BROUGHT ALL THESE BUCKETS AND SHOVELS?

No but seriously, he might be the best person out of everyone here to go to the beach with. He’s fun, free spirited, and he’s a traveling bard who’s been alive long enough to know where all the best beaches in Teyvat are. (He also knows a guy- er, well, dragon I suppose- who is willing to fly them to any place).

He’ll play some soft tunes while you doze under the sun.

HE PICKS PRETTY SHELLS AND GIFTS THEM TO YOU!!!

He will bring booze. I’m pretty sure this is a necessity. If you’re a little upset about it, he’ll probably “eheh~” his way out of it. That slick bastard.

If you really insist on him not drinking, he won’t consume much alcohol.

If some creepy person approaches you and tries to ruin you your day of beach time fun, all of their stuff will suddenly be blown away, causing them to scramble back to their spot and (almost embarrassingly) flail around trying to catch everything. What a shame…

At the end of the day, he’d be a little sad to leave. Definitely makes plans about tbe two of you going back soon.

I gotta give him a 10/10 he’s just so fun omg.

[the-force-of-imagines]

Loki and The Star

Loki x gn!reader

@thatfanficstuff

@thatdarkfanficstuff

Warning: Small Death in a character.

Word count:2,717

Summary: this is a Fairytale au. If you know where this sounds familiar you are 100% right.

I'm sorry in advance if it sucks. It sounded better in my head. And also references from the movie "Stardust."

Soft humming of a lullaby can be heard through the bedroom corridor of the castle, and every now and then a guard could hear and smile knowing that the King's spouse was in the room putting there grandchildren to sleep. In the middle of the room sitting in a rocking chair was the King's spouse looking out the window at the moon and the stars. In their arms was the youngest, Ragnar, was in their arms wide awake. That is when they heard the oldest, Astrid, call out to them.

"Yes, Astrid," they say while looking at the young girl who was sitting up in her bed. 

"Can you tell us a story?" She asks with a small smile graceing her lips.

"Yeah! I want to hear a story!" Bjorn yells in excitement while jumping up in joy on his bed.

As the adult chuckles at how enthusiastic these children were. As they waited patiently for the grandparent to speak up. They noticed a smile softly gracing their lips, and them speaking up. 

"Have you ever heard of the story of the youngest prince , and the fallen star?" They question the children. 

When they shook their head no and a small gurgle from the child in his arms. Their smile grew on their face, and sighs while adjusting Ragnar in their arms. When they looked back to the two children in there beds, and cleared their throat.

"Alright, children," they say getting the children's attention, " lay back in bed, and relax. Before we start the story." 

As they waited for them to get comfortable in their bed, they adjusted themselves with the youngest in their arms. When all four of them were settled in there respected places, and they all looked at each other and waited for the adult to start the story.

"About 150 years ago, a young god by the name of… Loki who was the god of" 

"Mischief!?"yelled the two children in there beds.

"Yes, mischief. Loki had to go threw many obstacles, but never mind how the god of mischief became a boy. This is the story of how Loki becomes a king, a much greater challenge altogether. For him to achieve it,  he must win the heart of his one true love."

"Loki!" Sigyn shouted getting his attention from across the room.

As Loki looked up from where he sat with book in hand,and smiled at the women in front him. He swiftly stood putting the marker in the page he left on and set it down, stood straight, and bowed. 

"Are you ready for the picnic on midgard?" Loki asked.

Sigyn nodded enthusiasticly wrapped her arm around Loki's. As they made there way to the bifrost, they spoke about what its going to be like on midgard. When they entered and saw Hemdal, who slowly nodded towards them, and opened the bifrost to the destination. As they entered the bifrost, and landed in Wales, England.

"My gods! This wine is always delicious! How did…Well how does a young prince like yourself get your hands on one of these bottles?" Sigyn asks.

"Well, living in the palace, and being the second son of Odin, and being the god of mischief,” loki says but never got to finish because of Sigyn laughter was heard.

"Alright, I get it." She took another sip and looked around the field.

"You know, I never intended to accept the marriage with Theoric." She says sadly. 

"You know, i would cross oceans, and slay any beast to take your hand in marriage. I would go beyond the nine realms and bring back your weight in gold. I would,"  loki says with his whole heart. 

She chuckles, "your funny, loki. People Iike you and me,we're just not...We should be going. Its really late."

"Well then," Loki starts, "shall we finish this wine before we head back to asgard."

"Okay," she smiles softly. 

But if Loki had known then that Heimdall and the stars watched earth, he'd shudder at the thought of having and audience to his humiliation. But, fortunately for him, nearly every star in the sky was at that moment looking in earnest at the land on the other side of the land where an evil witch and her son were looking for two things in particular. Adrastus, the son of the witch, and also the bastard son of the king's seventh son. Wisteria, the mother of Adrastus, and also known as the eldest witch of her two sisters.

Adrastus was on the search of his fathers ruby. 'He of royal blood shall be king' the king had said on his death bed, and for his mother a star. But what both of them didn't know was that the ruby was actually found lying next to the star. And with Loki and Sigyn, Loki had promised Sigyn to bring back the shooting star for her hand in marriage. And that's what the youngest prince had done, he had sent Sigyn back to asgard and hadset off to a journey. 

It had taken less than a couple of hours to find where the star had land. Loki smiled brightly at the thought of marrying Sigyn. As he had gotten closer he had noticed that that it was no star at all, but a young (man\women\person)  no older then approximately 20 years of age. As Loki got closer the (man\women\person) that was in the crater backed away from him. When Loki lifted up his hands in a saying that he wasn't going to hurt them at all. 

"What is your name little one?" He asked them politely. 

"My name is (y\n). May i ask what your name is kind sir?" You questioned back. 

"Loki Odinson god of mischief. Soon to be ruler of asgard," He spoke thinking they would probably know who he is. 

"Asgard? Wha- what are you doing all the way out here on earth?" You questioned him with a bit of concern.

"That is none of your concern, but may I ask you. Where is the star?" Loki questions. 

"What do you mean where?" You through the question back.

"Clearly we both know where it landed as we both are in the crater that it landed in. Now please tell me. Where is it?" Loki questions again a bit annoyed.

"Please don't laugh, but I'm the star that fell. If you want me to be specific up there is where, this bloody necklace knocked me out of the sky when I was practically minding my own business." You said with a bit of sarcasm. 

"So your telling me your the star. You?" Loki says a little bit in not believing you one bit.

Until he noticed that when you looked him in the eyes he noticed that you were shinning. He couldn't really believe in what he was seeing, but he can because he had encountered much worse then a shinning star in front of him. As they both talked some more, and explained everything to each other on what's going to happen. Loki had heard something move to the right of him, so he decided that they both should move out of the crater and find some shelter. 

Not far from where they were they had stopped by a building, more importantly an Inn to be precise.

It had been a couple of days since they both had been trying to find a clearing, and hiding so no one can see who they are, or where they are going. They only traveled at night,and stayed in the morning in Inn's. As they were together in getting to certain destination they had gotten closer in knowing each other. 

Loki has never felt like this before, he never felt more like he could be free. He never understood how an adventure with someone like (y\n). They danced, and they met a captaim and crew who taught them how to protect themselves. (Y\n) was slowly falling for the asgardian prince, and Loki was falling for the star. But as they were close to getting out of there, and returning back to asgard. The witch and her son were waiting for them to get a hold of the star. 

When they saw them enter the clearing, she had casted a spell on the flowers to make them fall into a dreamless sleep. When they noticed the two on the ground asleep, Adrastus went over and crouched next to the young (man\women\person), and smiled sadisticly. He looked back to his mother and spoke enthusiasticly. 

"We got them mother. We finally got what we wanted."

"Exactly, my son," Westeria spoke happily, " Let's take her home, and get you that thrown."

As they disappeared with the star, and leaving Loki behind. But he was never alone, a group of asgardians came and took him back home. When Loki came too he had noticed he wasn't on midgard anymore. More importantly (y\n) was no longer by his side. He quickly got up and made his way out of the medical wing and into the thrown room where Odin was. 

"Where are they?!" He shouted.

When Odin looked at him with not one ounce of a reaction. As Loki waited for an answer he looked straight up in his eyes amd knew the answer. He ran straight out of the castle and straight to Heimdall, and demanded to be taken to where (y\n) was. But before he could enter and leave to midguard. He was stopped by his brother Sigyn and Thor. Sigyn had asked where her star was and why he was leaving her behind. But he just looked at her, and told her the truth that he wasn't in love with her anymore. So he turned away, and Thor had accompanyed him back to midguard in getting (y\n) back. 

As they both scoped the mansion they noticed you laying on your back tied down on a table. As Loki walked in through the door he heard it slam behind him, and the banging coming from the other side of the door from Thor. 

"Well, well, well. If it isn't Loki Odinson," Wisteria spoke enthusiasticly with a bit of sarcasm, "Adrastus, get him."

As Adrastus got his sword out, and did some twirls with it. He didn't notice Thor making his way through a hidden passage way behind him. And struck him before he could strike Loki down. Both brothers looked to each other and nodded in gratitude. When they looked up to where the witch was, she was staring back with wide misty eyes in her son laying motionless on the floor. She knew she couldn't defeat them by herself. As she looked at the star she finally came to a decision and let them go. As (y\n) ran to Loki's side, and was ready to leave this place behind. 

"Just leave! Everything I cared about is gone." Wisteria cries out, "Go! Go!"

As they made there way to the door, Thor had made it out of the door before it closed on him once more, and so was the hidden entrance. 

"No!" Thor yells out, " Loki!"

"I owe you my thanks, Loki," Wisteria starts out, "What use was there heart to me when it was broken? Also your moronic brother getting ride of my son, and now I can finally have the star all to myself."

As Loki tries to push you behind him, but you move to his front and hug him sound his middle. 

"Hold me tight, and close your eyes tightly." You say with a calming voice. 

"What?" Loki questions, "Why?"

"What do stars do?" You breathlessly say.

As you both hold on to each other, and Loki shutting his eyes tight. Not before noticing Wisteria at the bottom of the steps. But he heard (y\n) whisper.

"Shine." 

Even with his eyes closed he can still see the brightness. But Wisteria had no chance in trying to hide, and she was instantly incinerated. As the glow dyed down Loki and (Y\n) slowly opened their eyes and looked around. When they looked back at each other, and smiled knowing they made it. As they stared into each others eyes and slowly inced closer, and closer. Inches away from the kiss Thor entered with hammer in hand. Ready for the rest of the fight, but there was no one left for him.  He looked back to Loki and (Y\n) and gave them the goofiest smile at how close they were. But slowly turned around, and went back out the door without uttering a word. 

"I thought I lost you," Loki breathes out while leaning his forehead with yours.

"But you came back," you spoke. 

"Of course I did. I love you." Loki says with the biggest smile. 

But before they can say anything else they heard Thor calling out for them to come out. As they were making there way to the door, Loki noticed the necklace you were wearing was broken on the floor. Except for the ruby that was on the floor. As he bent over and grabbed it he headed out not noticing that the ruby turned blood red from when it was clear moments before. When he caught up and stood next to you he noticed Odin and Frigga standing in front of them both. As Loki looked back down at his hand he noticed the color of the stone. But so did his mother who gasped in delight. Odin let a small smile gracing his lips, and Thor, Loki and (y\n) were confused. As they looked at their elders in front of them waiting for them to understand what's going on.

"My son," Odin began, "You are the one true king. The one who will take my place as the protector of the 9 realms."

As (y\n) and Thor stared at Loki in awe, as Loki stared into the eyes of (y\n), and knew who he wanted by his side for the rest of his life. And he knew he was ready to be king, but he also thought of Sigyn. Yet he didn't fell true love with her; it was more like a puppy love then anything else. He smiled, and looked at his father and spoke up while spreading his arms wide. 

"Where do we begin."

"They ruled for decades, but no god can live forever, except he who possess the heart of a star, and (Y\N) had given theirs to Loki completely. When their children were grown, and they looked over their grandchildren. It was time for them to actually become the brightest stars of Asgard. And they live happily ever after," the king finished the story.

"Do you think it was really true?," Bjorn question while looking at his grandparents.

"What do you think my sweet boy?," (Y\N) questions him while letting off a little shimmer of light.

As the two older children gasped in shock; while you got up and put Ragnar in his bed and tucking him in. They both looked at each other and smiled knowing that the whole story was true. About the witch and her son, the ruby, and the star. 

"Alright children," you say getting their attention.

"It is time for you to sleep," Loki finishes off. 

"Aww, but-" Astrid tries to say, but got quiet when she noticed the look on your face. 

When you made your rounds and placing snowdrops under their pillows for protection. They left with a small goodnight, and went to their own bedroom. As (Y\N) looked to Loki they noticed a smile gracing his lips, and quirked his brow in questioning him on what the problem was.

"You always love telling that story don't you," he questions.

"Why, yes," you start, " many may tell the story of how you stole the heart of a star."

"Well, they probably don't know that you also stole the heart of the one true king of asgard," Loki says teasingly.

As you both chuckled, and walked out to the balcony and looked up to the stars reminiscing in the many adventures you both had. Remembering it as if it was just yesterday. 

The end.

Or is it.