#Single Review: Villain
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life-in-toontown · 20 days ago
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Sorry but I just need a little vent post about Lilo and Stitch to get this shit off my chest
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I’m not going to go over every single change listed here, this post is mainly gonna be about Nani and Lilo, and Jumba will be mentioned eventually too.
In the original film, Nani was not a neglectful sister. Yes, she and Lilo did fight with each other (yelling, not physical abuse, of course) but ffs, Nani was just 19 years old and was now the sole caretaker of her five year old sister, a sister who was not an easy child to deal with (I’m not saying that to imply Lilo’s a bad character, not at all. She had a group of girls always bullying her for being different, and that combined with her trauma and grief from losing her parents results in her getting behavioral issues and resorting to physical violence against her bullies. I actually love that they portrayed her in that complicated and complex way).
And don’t forget Nani’s grieving throughout the whole movie too, hell she probably never even found time to process her grief since she’s suddenly in the role of a caretaker and provider for her little sister. And just to add to this, her room has lots of surfing trophies which means she was on her way to becoming a professional surfer but she had to give that up for Lilo.
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So yeah, of course Nani wasn’t a perfect parent to Lilo, she was a grieving 19 year old woman taking care of a five year old with behavioral issues. And honestly, you’d think it would make sense for her to give Lilo to CPS right?
BUT.
Look at their family at the end of the film.
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Jumba and Pleakley live with them as Lilo’s gay uncles, Cobra Bubbles is now a family friend, and Nani and David get to date more.
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Their family grew, Nani’s able to have time to herself to grow her relationship with David since Lilo has more people to watch her.
They even get to go on trips!
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And it’s all thanks to Stitch.
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Oh boy, here I go, this always makes me cry ;___;
But someone at Disney said, “Meh idk, maybe that found family ending wasn’t such a good idea after all :/ I know! Let’s end the movie with Nani and Lilo separated! And Jumba and Pleakley* won’t be involved in their found family either cuz they’re villains throughout the whole thing now!”
*I keep seeing people talk about Jumba being a villain now but what happens to Pleakley at the end of the movie? If anyone knows please tell me.
Anyone who gives this remake good reviews and uses words like “heartfelt” or “heartwarming” or any other synonyms like that either fell asleep during the movie or was paid to say that I stg.
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kenzdolls · 2 months ago
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𝐀 𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐎’𝐒 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐄
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𖤐 synopsis: with the feeling of being disregarded from izuku, you try to end the relationship; but, izuku unexpectedly reels you back in with a surprisingly, odd way of an apology.
𖤐 trigger warnings: angst/fluff at the end
𖤐 pairing: izuku midoriya x gender neutral! reader
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the afternoon sun cast long shadows across u.a. high school's campus as you made your way toward heights alliance, the dormitory where class 1-a resided. your footsteps were heavy, matching the weight in your chest.
today marked exactly two months since you and izuku midoriya had started dating, but instead of celebrating, you were dreading the conversation you needed to have.
the world outside the school walls had grown increasingly dangerous. villains were organizing, heroes were falling, and somehow in the middle of it all was your boyfriend—a sixteen-year-old with the weight of an impossible legacy on his shoulders and determination burning in his eyes that sometimes scared you.
you found him in the common room, notebook open on his lap, muttering analysis to himself as he reviewed footage of recent hero battles. his green hair was messier than usual, and dark circles shadowed his eyes. he hadn't noticed you yet.
"izuku," you called softly.
his head snapped up, and immediately his tired face transformed with a smile that made your heart ache. "hey! i didn't hear you come in." he closed his notebook and patted the spot beside him on the couch. "i was just studying some new techniques that could help with controlling—"
"can we talk?" you interrupted, remaining standing. "somewhere private?"
his smile faltered, concern immediately replacing his enthusiasm. "sure. my room?"
the walk up to the fourth floor was quiet, tension building with each step. izuku's room was exactly as it always was—all might memorabilia covering nearly every surface, analysis notebooks stacked on his desk, workout equipment in the corner. it should have felt comfortable by now, but today it just reminded you of how single-minded his focus could be.
"is everything okay?" he asked as he closed the door behind you.
you took a deep breath. "not really. i'm worried about you, izuku."
he blinked, confusion written across his freckled face. "worried? about me? why?"
"why?" you couldn't help the slight edge that crept into your voice. "have you looked in a mirror lately? you're exhausted. you're pushing yourself way too hard with this new blackwhip training. aizawa-sensei said you were in recovery girl's office twice this week."
izuku's shoulders tensed slightly. "that's normal for training. i have to master these quirks if i'm going to—"
"if you're going to what? save everyone? become the number one hero? die trying?" the words came out harsher than you intended, but weeks of bottled concern were finally spilling over.
his eyes widened. "that's not fair. you know how important this is."
"of course i know," you said, trying to keep your voice level. "the whole world knows how important it is. but i'm not dating the future symbol of peace or one for all or whatever. i'm dating you, izuku. the boy who might not live to graduation at this rate."
a flash of hurt crossed his face. "i'm being careful."
"no, you're not!" you gestured to the bandages peeking out from beneath his school uniform sleeve. "this isn't normal, izuku. most teenagers worry about exams and crushes, not villains targeting them specifically."
"i never said it would be normal," he countered, his voice quiet but firm. "when you said you wanted to be with me, i thought you understood what that meant."
the implication stung. "so i'm just supposed to watch you destroy yourself? smile and nod while you come back with new scars every week?"
"i'm getting stronger!" his voice rose slightly, a rare show of frustration. "every training session, every new technique—it's all to make sure i can protect everyone. to make sure i can protect you."
"i never asked you to protect me," you said. "i asked you to be with me. there's a difference."
the argument built like a gathering storm, months of unspoken fears and frustrations finally finding voice. the common room incident with bakugo where izuku had jumped in front of you unnecessarily. the hospital visit after his internship that he'd downplayed. the nightmares he wouldn't talk about that left him shaking and distant.
"you don't understand what's coming," izuku said, running a hand through his hair. "the league is getting stronger. all for one is—"
"stop." you held up your hand. "i'm not asking for hero intel, izuku. i'm asking for my boyfriend to care about his own safety as much as he cares about everyone else's." "i do care!"
"then why won't you ever slow down? why won't you let anyone help you? even all might is worried, i can see it when he watches you train."
his face flushed with emotion. "because there isn't time! because if i fail, people die! because all might chose me, and i can't let him down!"
the words hung in the air between you, heavy and revealing. this wasn't just about heroics or training—this was about a boy desperate to prove himself worthy of an impossible mantle.
you sighed, suddenly feeling very tired. "i can't compete with that, can i? with all might, with one for all, with your destiny or whatever you want to call it." "it's not a competition," he said softly. "it feels like one. and i'm losing." you reached for your bag. "maybe we rushed into this. maybe dating the successor to all might isn't something i'm cut out for."
panic flashed across izuku's face. "wait, what are you saying?" "i'm saying i need space to think, izuku. this isn't what i thought it would be." you turned toward the door, willing yourself not to cry. "i care about you too much to watch you self-destruct."
"please don't go," he whispered, voice cracking slightly. "not like this." but you were already reaching for the doorknob, determined to leave before the tears threatening to spill could fall. you needed time to sort through your feelings, to decide if loving a boy with the weight of the world on his shoulders was something you could actually handle.
"i'm sorry," you said quietly. what happened next occurred so quickly you barely had time to register it. there was a crackling sound, a flash of dark energy in your peripheral vision, and suddenly you felt something wrap firmly around your waist—not painfully, but with unmistakable strength. blackwhip.
the dark tendrils of izuku's newer quirk had extended from his hand, gently but firmly holding you in place. before you could protest, he had pulled you back toward him, spinning you around to face him. his eyes were wide with surprise at his own actions, a look that suggested he'd acted purely on instinct.
and then, in a move that shocked you both, he leaned forward and pressed his lips firmly against your cheek—a desperate, impulsive gesture that silenced whatever words had been forming on your lips.
for a moment, neither of you moved. the blackwhip dissipated, but izuku didn't step away, his face inches from yours, cheeks burning crimson.
"i—i'm sorry," he stammered, mortification dawning as he realized what he'd done. "i didn't mean to use my quirk on you. that was completely inappropriate and—"
"izuku," you interrupted his spiraling apology. "you used blackwhip on me." he winced. "i know. i'm really sorry. i panicked and—"
"no," you said, something warm unfurling in your chest despite everything. "you controlled it perfectly. no damage. no pain."
his rambling stopped as he processed your words. "oh. yeah, i guess i did." a small, tentative smile crossed your face. "that's the first time you've used it without hurting yourself or breaking something. and you did it…for me." the realization seemed to dawn on him too, his eyes widening slightly. "i wasn't even thinking about control. i just didn't want you to leave."
you reached up, touching your cheek where his kiss still lingered. "and the, um…?"
his blush deepened impossibly. "that was impulse. total impulse. i'm sorry if it was unwelcome or—"
"it wasn't unwelcome," you said softly. the tension between you shifted, the anger from moments before not gone but transformed into something different, something more vulnerable. "i'm scared, izuku," you admitted, finally voicing the fear that had been driving your anger. "not of villains or fighting or any of that. i'm scared of losing you."
his expression softened, understanding replacing defensiveness. "i'm scared too," he confessed. "all the time. but that's why i have to keep pushing, keep getting stronger."
"but at what cost?" you reached for his hand, turning it over to reveal the scars that mapped his sacrifices. "these aren't just training injuries. these are pieces of yourself you're giving away." izuku looked down at his scarred hand in yours. "i know it seems that way. but every scar is a lesson learned. a mistake i won't make again."
"and what about us? am i just another lesson waiting to happen?"
he shook his head firmly. "no. never." he took a deep breath. "look, i can't promise i'll stop training hard. i can't promise i won't put myself in danger when lives are at stake. but i can promise that you're not competing with anything or anyone. you're…" he searched for words, "you're the reason i come back, not just the reason i fight." "that sounds nice, but what does it actually mean?"
"it means i'll try harder to find balance. to take breaks. to let you in when things get overwhelming instead of shouldering everything alone." he squeezed your hand gently. "and maybe…maybe you could help me remember that saving the world includes saving enough of myself for the things that matter after the fighting's done."
you studied his face—earnest, determined, those green eyes that had always seen more in you than you sometimes saw in yourself. "that's a lot of maybes."
"i know. but i'm willing to try if you are." he hesitated, then added quietly, "i don't want our first argument to be our last conversation."
despite everything, you felt a smile tugging at your lips. "you know, most couples' first fights are about something normal. like where to eat dinner or forgetting an anniversary."
he laughed softly, the sound a welcome break in the tension. "when have either of us ever been normal?"
"fair point." you sighed, some of the anger and frustration finally draining away. "for the record, using your quirk to stop someone from walking away is definitely crossing a line." he winced. "i know. it won't happen again."
"good." you stepped closer, poking his chest lightly. "because next time i might actually be mad enough that you'd end up in recovery girl's office for an entirely different reason."
his eyes widened slightly before he caught the teasing in your tone, a smile spreading across his face. "so…there will be a next time? for us, i mean?"
instead of answering immediately, you reached up and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek, mirroring his impulsive gesture from before. "yes, you heroic idiot. but we have a lot to figure out." relief washed over his features. "we will. i promise." he hesitated, then added, "um, can i…i mean, would it be okay if i…"
you rolled your eyes, but couldn't suppress your smile. "yes, deku, you can kiss me properly now."
his face lit up with the same determined joy you'd seen when he mastered a new technique, and as he leaned in, his lips finding yours in a gentle, tentative kiss, you understood something important: loving izuku midoriya would never be easy. there would always be dangers and fears and arguments about his reckless heroism.
but maybe, just maybe, it would be worth it.
outside the window, clouds shifted, allowing late afternoon sunlight to stream into the room, illuminating the space between two teenagers figuring out how to balance first love against the weight of a world that demanded heroes.
"for what it's worth," izuku whispered as he pulled back from the kiss, his forehead resting against yours, "controlling blackwhip was a lot easier when i was thinking about holding onto you instead of fighting."
you smiled, storing that confession away like a precious secret. "then maybe we've both learned something important today."
as the sun continued its descent outside, casting long shadows across u.a.'s campus, you and izuku sat on the edge of his bed, hands intertwined, talking about boundaries and fears and hopes—the kind of conversation that transforms a crush into something deeper, something worth fighting for.
your first argument hadn't ended your relationship. instead, it had given it roots, something solid to grow from. and in a world increasingly filled with uncertainty and danger, that was its own kind of heroism.
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taglist: — open! [dm me if you’re interested]
mutuals: @https-bakugo @n3r0-5352 @kitkat13001 @haikyuubby @https-bakugo
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© 𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐙𝐃𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐒 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟓 —
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hattedhedgehog · 8 months ago
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My (spoiler-free) thoughts on Dragon Age: The Veilguard
The review embargo has lifted and I can officially say that I've played through Dragon Age: The Veilguard early! 
Here are my spoiler-free thoughts and personal opinions on the overall gameplay experience: 
Narrative:
Rook's dialogue and decisions impact SO MUCH of the game, and come into play later on. From companions remembering your beverage preferences, to whether someone you spared shows up later to help or harm you, it feels like the game is paying attention and that you matter.
The stakes are unbelievably high. The Evanuris are utterly terrifying villains, in ways that Corypheus wasn’t. You really feel the magnitude of their power on a personal level as well as a worldwide level.
Whatever your thoughts on him, Solas is FUN as a character. He’s fun to talk to, fun to talk strategy with, fun to rile up and verbally spar with and fun to grudgingly ally with. Now that he can drop his former act and appear to you as the Dread Wolf, and you get to see his memories, you and he team get to decide how to utilise his knowledge and how far your trust extends.
The setup and payoff of the story beats are absolutely superb. The emotional turmoil as a player of being ensnared by things that was foreshadowed earlier in the game is utterly exquisite. Every thread of the larger tapestry has been woven with so much love by the writing team, and every character’s arc tie into the larger story in interesting ways.
The characters feel like they have full lives outside of the player character. You frequently go exploring their home turf and can meet their friends and family. They interact with each other on their own and move about the Lighthouse to spend time together, leave notes for each other, and talk about each other even when the other isn’t there. The team feels like they all really care about each other as well as you. 
You can tell what your approval rating is with characters, but if you want to romance them you have to put some thought into it. Interactions and world events besides the heart on the dialogue wheel influence their attraction to you.
Gameplay:
The combat is very engaging, and I enjoyed how unique all the enemies were.
Abilities in the skill tree can be refunded so you can redirect to a different specialization, which is really handy if you’re indecisive and overwhelmed at first (like I get when choosing abilities).  Most companions can get healing abilities no matter what class, so you don’t have to worry about balancing your rogues/mages/warriors (most of the time).
Climbing, balancing on ledges, using ziplines and sliding down slopes made environments feel more immersive. Additionally I like how each companion has unique abilities that let them interact with the world (fixing mechanisms, breathing fire, summoning bridges from the Fade, etc), and learning their abilities alongside them helps you grow closer.
The wayfinder light makes everything feel streamlined, so it's way harder to get lost while exploring an area. I hardly had to look at the mini map at all, and usually I’m glued to it! This meant I could actually look around at the beautiful environments and appreciate how lively they were, even without NPCs.
The upgrade system is far less overwhelming than in Inquisition; there are a finite amount of weapons/armour/accessories to be found, which are designed for each specific character like in DA:O and DA:2. There's also no longer crafting from scratch. If you loot an item you already have, it automatically upgrades the single item rather than giving you duplicates.
You know that frustration of coming across higher-level armour that just isn’t as flattering as your current one? Not to worry, you can collect “appearances” which you can toggle on as the visual for the armour while still retaining the benefits of the original.
I cannot stress enough how simple and easy to use the inventory is. It's heavenly. 
Using the shops of specific cities increases your reputation within those cities, which is a good incentive to explore and use the shops. I usually hate in-world shopping but here it was simple, and thinking about it tactically worked pretty well.
Quests sometimes reach a point where you can't continue at your current place in the story, and must return to in later acts. When re-exploring familiar areas, everything feeling big enough to be fresh with each visit, and new loot and codex entires appear.
Edit: something I forgot to mention. In character creator, you get to make your Inquisitor after you make Rook. The build menus are all the same, so manage your energy accordingly for doing it all again immediately after for your Inky. I spent an hour and a half building my Rook and wanted to get right to playing, and had to re-wire my brain a bit to be patient and keep going with the CC. (Seeing my Inquisitor with new graphics was awesome though).
A couple little things I appreciated:
The control sounds are very pleasing. From the whoosh of opening the combat wheel to the clinking of upgrades to the subtle whir of holding the decision button, they're a nice touch.
If companions are interrupted in conversation by combat, they resume it afterwards with a "what were you saying before?".
Photo mode is so fun to play with, and you can adjust blur/brightness/lens/depth within the scene. You can also toggle on and off the visibility of your Rook, your party, NPCs and enemies!
Assan learns new interaction tricks at the Lighthouse as the game goes on.
Nitpicks:
Overall I had an incredibly positive experience. The gripes I had were tiny things like:
I genuinely like the new art style of the game as a whole. However, the blurriness of some of the features in contrast with some elements being very crisp was distracting.
When trying to sell valuables for faction points without using Sell All, it takes quite a long time to count up all the individual sales, and it isn't a live counter. So it's kind of annoying if you get +3 points for each item you sell, need 150 points to get the next tier of items, and over 10K worth of valuables that you want to sell to other factions. 
If you do lots of quests without returning to the Lighthouse often, occasionally companions at the Lighthouse will have dialogue pertaining to the quests you've just finished as if you haven't done them.
You can pet the dogs and cats in the cities, but Rook turns their back to the camera to do it and it blocks most of the action unless you rotate quickly.
Gender stuff:
I was incredibly moved that not only can Rook be trans/nonbinary in the character creator if you so choose, but they get options to feel differently about their identity and journey, and it impacts their dialogue and how they relate to other characters! To access this make sure to interact with Varric's Mirror in your room in the Lighthouse. There are many conversation options throughout the game to discuss your identity with other characters, or relate your change of self to other situations. Crucially, it comes up when entering a romance and you have to communicate with your partner about it, which I never even THOUGHT of including in a game because it seemed impossible to even allow trans main characters to begin with.
There are also multiple trans and nonbinary characters throughout Thedas. What I found the most realistic was that just like in life, it is a consistent presence in any character's life, and comes up in conversation more than once. I have never seen a game this forthcoming and open about the topic of transitioning, and it was so validating. 
Final thoughts:
I adore the other games in the franchise. Something about The Veilguard affected me in a way no other game has. I cried multiple times while playing this game, both from joy and sadness. What struck me most is that the people who worked on this game REALLY listened to feedback from previous games, and were very set on making a piece of art that meant something to people. Even during the last few years of me testing the game, things have been adjusted and changed in direct response to our reactions and suggestions. It's surreal and quite touching.
Mileage will vary, but my playthrough was 70 hours on very low difficulty and I haven't done every side quest yet. I could easily have spent more than 100 hours in the game if I wasn't pressed for time.
I hope you enjoy this game as much as I have. See you in Thedas.
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bogleech · 16 days ago
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I actually didn't know as a kid that halloween "haunts" were a common thing and I had no idea what they were like; I only knew my area got flooded every fall with brochures for "JASON'S WOODS" which bragged (with no photos) that you'd encounter every single scariest horror monster, Jason and Freddy and Dracula and even The Fly! Aliens and demons and cyborgs as real looking as the movies!
I assumed it was the only horror attraction like that in the world, thought it'd basically be like they leave you to wander the woods getting chased around by 500 slasher villains and I was fascinated but way too scared of blood and gore to ever want to see it.
I also assumed this had to be all officially licensed, like all the hollywood horror film people had got together to make it.
I was especially freaked out by their claim that they had their own unique monster, a demon named ZEBADIAS who was more terrifying and more powerful than all the other characters, a boss demon who actually brought them all together like the god of all horror (yes this does all sounds weirdly like Dead By Daylight)
They had artwork of ZEBADIAS in shadow, hunched over with huge long claws, and I assumed he'd be like a million dollar slimy animatronic too terrifying to even imagine.
Anyway I finally went to Jason's Woods just once when I was 17 and that year it was entirely a scary wizard of oz parody hayride, and if youre wondering, this is ZEBADIAS:
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(All this is to say that I love and respect Jason's Woods dearly. And youtube reviews indicate it has grown a very very great deal in 25+ years)
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e-vay · 5 months ago
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SONIC 3 REVIEW
I wanted to wait a few weeks to give many people the chance to see Sonic 3 before I wrote a review, but of course I'll keep it under the cut for those who still haven't seen it.
DISCLAIMERS!
I acknowledge that the Sonic Cinematic Universe is a SEPARATE interpretation of the Sonic franchise so I will never dock it points for doing things different than we've seen in the games. These movies are inspired by the Sonic the Hedgehog video games, they are not direct adaptations. I have no sympathy for anyone who complains these movies get things 'wrong' about the games.
I acknowledge that the Sonic movies are family films marketed towards children, so some of the writing and plot devices are simplified or toned down for younger audiences. However, that won't stop me from pointing out some plot holes.
My review is just my opinion. I'm not saying I'm right or that you're wrong if you disagree.
I'm so damn excited to finally talk about it and I have SO MUCH to say, so buckle up!
TL;DR: I give Sonic 3 a score of 9/10, just barely shy of being an absolutely perfect movie! There were some editing choices and some plot holes that made me dock minor points. These nitpicks are small and almost insignificant compared to the whole of the film, but they stood out enough to bother me and they're why I can't give it a perfect rating.
Let's start with the positives.
CAST & CHARACTERS - 10/10
TL;DR - With a star-studded cast, it's almost impossible to say any one actor/character outshined the others. Every single person was on their A-game for this movie and gave emotional, hilarious, all-out performances.
Jim Carrey as both Ivo and Gerald Robotnik is genius! He plays both characters so differently that you could almost believe they were being played by two different people -- minus the tongue-in-cheek way the movie reminds you that they're the same person.
This iteration of Gerald is unlike any we've seen before, which kept me on my toes the entire time I was watching. He comes onto the scene fully claiming that he's a villain, but still he manages to suckerpunch you (and Ivo) with the final reveal of his ultimate plan. You would think that the same old man who was just doing a choreographed dance performance 20 minutes ago couldn't tear your heart out without even the use of words when we see him mourning the loss of his granddaughter, and then fill you with spine-chilling terror as he uses his whole chest to exclaim he's going to 'burn it all down!', but damn did Jim Carrey do that and more! This movie (and Jim Carrey alike) managed to make Gerald both the major comic relief of the movie AND simultaneously made him one of the most despicable villains in the franchise so far. His utter lack of compassion for Shadow or Ivo, using both of them as his puppets, really shows you how little this man values even those who are supposed to be closest to him. I encourage you to rewatch the movie and really appreciate the dynamic range we were given of this character in under a 2 hour window.
Ivo is back and better than ever, baby (despite what Tails says)! Though I liked the initial, unexpected take on his character in Sonic 1, it has been beyond satisfying to see the evil doctor's descent into madness, all culminating into THE Eggman we recognize from the games! Seeing him in the iconic Eggman suit was like seeing my baby in her gown for prom. I was one proud mama! Sonic 3 sends Ivo on an emotional rollercoaster and we not only get to see him the silliest he's ever been, but your heart truly breaks for him by the end of the film. Honestly, I'm still gutted over Gerald's "Ivo, you're no Maria" line! One thing I particularly loved is that repeatedly throughout this franchise, Ivo has mentioned how society has always rejected him, he's had nobody who loves him (except Stone ofc) and he's repeatedly reminded he's a failure. Yet at the end of this film, he's given the chance to live up to his real potential and Team Sonic (and Shadow (and all of Earth while we're at it)) wouldn't have stood a chance without him. With Ivo seemingly dead, this was a heartfelt, tearjerking, beautiful sendoff for Eggman in a way that doesn't feel forced and gives Jim Carrey the chance to excuse himself should he decide he no longer wants to be a part of the future movies. BUT if he does decide to come back (and it's sounding like he does) -- c'mon, y'all don't really think Shadow would have just left Eggman to die, do you? He absolutely could have teleported them both outta there at the last minute.
SHADOW. 👏👏👏 This was without a doubt, the BEST depiction of Shadow I have ever seen! Keanu Reeves and the animators put everything into this rendition of Shadow and I was moved to tears on several occasions. This movie gave us an emotional, heartbroken Shadow who doesn't mask his feelings. Even before losing Maria, we see that Shadow is someone who struggles with understanding who he is, where he comes from and what his purpose is. He's subjected to constant testing and when he's not 'in use,' he's seemingly stowed away in the dark for later. It isn't until Maria shows up and befriends him that we get to see that he's just a regular person. He's curious about music and dancing, he enjoys play and stargazing, he's self-conscious. And then the transformation he takes after being betrayed and losing his loved ones, UGH! Keanu Reeves freaking NAILS it in every single scene! One of the moments that stood out the most to me and physically gave me goosebumps was when Shadow begins to question if destroying the planet is what Maria would have wanted and Gerald convinces him to focus on the pain that was left from her death. When Shadow's charging the Eclipse Cannon and reliving the most devastating moment of his life, you can hear his rage just in the way he's breathing! Keanu Reeves doesn't even speak any words in that scene but I could feel every drop of anger and regret and hatred in his performance. But also he delivered some very funny lines too and at least to me, it didn't feel forced. I also really liked that Keanu Reeves did research for this character and actually 'created' a voice for Shadow instead of using his normal voice. (I strongly recommend watching this clip where he talks about how he came up with 'the voice'. It's fascinating and such a delight). I think a lot of people might have initially thought having him voice Shadow was cool but kind of a joke, but he took the role very seriously and I feel he made an effort to separate himself from Shadow. His voice scratched my brain in the most satisfying way lol. I wish he could permanently voice Shadow from now on, but at least I can always imagine his voice whenever I read or play any Shadow content. Also, Shadow's character model was GOR-GEOUS. He was so handsome and badass and also I love, love, LOVE the amount of contrast between him and Sonic. EVEN DOWN TO THE DETAILS IN THE TEXTILES OF THEIR GLOVES. Sonic's gloves appear to be cotton so they're soft and warm and porous -- a fabric that comforts and lets things in. Shadow's gloves are leather -- a fabric that's firm, resistant, impenetrable. SO MUCH thought and detail went into designing Shadow. AND SUPER SHADOW OH MYGOOOODDDDDDDD. He looked like an angel! I have always loved Super Shadow's platinum design in the games, but giving him the extra detail of iridescent and rose gold quills in the movie was so freaking beautiful. I truly can't fault a single thing about him in this movie. A thousand kisses to Keanu Shadow.
TEAM SONIC. That's right, I'm addressing the group here because this movie really treated each member of Team Sonic as equals and I loved it. Sonic may be the leader, but Knuckles packed this movie full of action, heart and laughs. Idris Elba and the writers found a great balance for Knuckles in that he delivered what I thought were some of the funniest lines of the film, but it didn't lessen the impact of his more serious scenes. When Knuckles is arguing with Sonic about using the Chaos Emeralds, there is so much tension and I feel like they really nailed the gravity of that fight. Knuckles ultimately chooses not to battle Sonic, but I felt that him reminding Sonic of their oath and pointing out that Sonic is breaking it was actually MORE of a punishment than a punch to the face. We also really got to see Knuckles 'THE GUARDIAN" in this movie which I greatly appreciated. We see a lot of Knuckles "the fighter" where he's quick to throw fists, but there were many moments in Sonic 3 where he got to serve as a proper protector. I cried when he caught Sonic and Tails and even after they're safe he's just holding them, the three of them a battered mess in the cornfield! AH MY HEART!
Speaking of my heart-- Tails you good boy! Tails showed so much growth between Sonic 2 and Sonic 3 and I was so proud of him! He's still cute as can be and still has moments of childlike wonder, but he played a significantly larger role in this movie and showed a lot of maturity. He's quick to come up with plans but he is also actually in the action instead of shouting from the sidelines. I also really liked that during the bleakest part of the film, it's actually Tails who is trying to console Sonic about what's happened to Tom. You know things are bad when it's the baby sibling who attempts to be the emotionally strong one and comfort the older sibling. And I love that it's Tails and Knuckles who help Ivo to steer the Eclipse Cannon away from the Earth. It would have been easy to just sideline them and have them hope that Super Sonic and Super Shadow could handle things, but that diminishes the value of Team Sonic. The movie made it very clear that their teamwork is what made them so strong and it was through all of their combined efforts that the Earth was saved in the end. Sonic and Shadow could not have done it alone, even with the combined power of the Chaos Emeralds. I feel like a broken record by saying this but it has to be said: Colleen O'Shaughnessey killed it as Tails yet again. Go queen!
This might come as a surprise to some, but the Sonic in this movie is my favorite we've seen throughout the SCU franchise so far. I have heard people criticize that Sonic was a little 'boring' or 'underwhelming' during the first 2 acts of the movie, but I actually perceived that as intentional by design. At this point in Sonic's life, he's used to the whole hero thing. He's saved the world multiple times by now so it makes sense to me that he's become complacent and doesn't really take the time to consider how potentially dangerous a threat can be (I mean think about it, he nearly gets lasered-to-death via the forcefield at G.U.N. Headquarters just because he had to be a silly goof and do a tour of London NOW of all times! Yes it's funny and in-character and I still loved that scene ((and loved that it gave Tails a shining moment to save him)), but c'mon Sonic you almost fucked up the entire plan because you just had to do your goofy thing!). So when Shadow shows up and kicks his ass not once, but MULTIPLE times--and then he nearly loses his father figure TWICE--it serves as a rude awakening. He learns that there is a price to pay for being blasé, underestimating the gravity of a situation and not sticking to a plan, and that's where he dramatically overcompensates and goes on a vengeful arc. And vengeful Sonic is FUCKING. FANTASTIC. I think we as an audience can forget how lethal Sonic can be because he's normally so playful and silly, so to see him lock in and not hold back is actually pretty terrifying (but in a great way!). Ben Schwartz was AMAZING in this portion of the movie. I find him to be one of the funniest comedians on the planet, but I couldn't believe it was the same guy during this act. He dug deep and gave such a compelling performance full of anguish and hatred that I honestly didn't realize he was capable of. But most importantly--he was able to rein it in when it mattered most and Sonic didn't lose himself before it was too late. Sonic is not a perfect character, but one of the things that makes him such a great hero is that he always manages to hold on to the light that's inside of him. I always appreciate Sonic's motivational speeches and I loved that when he's having the heart-to-heart with Shadow, the emphasis is about who you are and the good that comes from the love you have for others. It's heavy and important but was delivered in a way that was easily digestible for younger viewers without diminishing the meaning of the message. However, what I found even more moving in this scene was the moment of silence that Sonic and Shadow share on the moon. It was so poignant and I'm glad they held that moment of stillness and quiet. By the end of the movie, we do get our loveable Sonic back but he acknowledges the mistakes he made and regrets putting everyone in danger because of his reckless decisions. Each movie builds up his character more and more and I think as long as they don't backpedal, Sonic's in store for some incredible things! ALSO! Just like I said with Shadow, I freaking LOVED Sonic's character model in this one! I love that we are seeing him physically growing up and maturing instead of being forever stuck in place (no shade to the games). This character model is SO much taller and stockier than the model in Sonic 1 and is evidence that not only is he emotionally maturing, but he's physically aging up as well. It's just so cool!
I absolutely adored Alyla Browne's portrayal of Maria in this movie! She was so charming and instantly loveable the moment she was onscreen. I've noticed many people highlighting the part where she draws the bunny face on Shadow (which I love) but even the seconds before that where she mocks his scowl INSTANTLY won me over. And she even gets Shadow to smile because of it! The smile is small and only visible for a few frames, but it's there! It was clear that this girl saw more to this alien than a menacing, dangerous little space demon and wasn't gonna put up with his charade. It's no wonder the two of them became fast friends. I don't know about you, but I have been STARVED of ARK Sibling content since Shadow's very first introduction so I was obsessed with every single scene we got of the two of them actually getting to spend time together. I do love drama but so far all we've seen is the ARK tragedy and rarely any of the highlights before that event. Yes the SCU is a different universe, but this filled a hole in my heart that I've been waiting on for years. It did not disappoint!
I also want to highlight Agent Stone. Listen, I've loved Lee Majdoub since Sonic 1, but his character is at his best in this movie. Agent Stone was proper badass in Sonic 3 and proved that he's far more than just a simple henchman. It's revealed that with Ivo sulking and remaining in hiding, Stone has stepped up and is constantly monitoring what's going on in the outside world and immediately jumps into action when he notices the doctor's tech being used by someone else. Eggman wasn't even aware of it and yet Stone is out there shutting it down and bringing back reinforcements to clear Eggman's name! That super suit?? And those MOTORCYCLE TRICKS?? And him dodging a freaking ROCKET like it ain't no thing??? Hell yeah, Stone! Lee Majdoub is so funny and I love how he can be so quiet and stoic around Eggman ( "Resourceful.") but he can also be so over the top like when he's mocking the hell out of Knuckles ("Įt'Ŝ 𝕋𝒽𝒆 ⓖ𝓸A𝐓 𝔪𝕀ŁҜє𝓡!... Relax.") and both just work so well! I think it's further evidence of why he makes such a good partner for Eggman because they're both capable of some intense power but they're also both such weirdos. I loved the amount of emotion and vulnerability Stone had in this movie. He's always had an allegiance to Eggman and even in Sonic 2 we saw how much he missed the doctor while he was away and how enthusiastic he was when he learned he was alive, but it went a lot deeper in this film. We got to learn that there's a much stronger affinity there and Stone legitimately cares about Robotnik and supports him through thick and thin. Personally, I ship Stobotnik, so this movie gave me plenty of delicious food! But even if you don't ship it, I think it was so significant to show the depth to Stone and Robotnik's relationship and I believe that it was Stone's affection for the doctor (romantic or platonic) that ultimately made Eggman save the world in the end. Though I'm still hoping for Jim Carrey to come back, I think they set things up so Stone could take up the EggMantle in a seamless way and I sure wouldn't be mad about it!
[Allow me to pause for a deep inhale of breath...]
Ä̷͇̰̞́Ȁ̷̭̩̰̔͐Ấ̶̝̗̠A̴͉͗A̵̳̠̚ͅA̵̫̋Ḿ̴͕Y̴̨̯̆Y̷͖͍̜̓͝Ỹ̵͍̺͑̕Y̸̜̫̆͋͋Y̶͕̫̱̾̐!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😭💖💖💖💖💖💖😘😘😘😘😍😍😍😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖 My beloved! My most darling angel! My reason for waking up in the morning! SHE MADE IT! Amy is my favorite character of all time and I told y'all I was gonna throw up if she wasn't in this movie, so you'd better believe I SCREAMED when her hammer appeared in the post-credits scene! When she walked up and pulled back the hood of her cloak I was in tears and I was TREMBLING! I'm sure they're going to make changes to her once they finalize her design for Sonic 4, but this reveal was so freaking good and got me so excited for the next movie. Her character model is already so beautiful and I love that they turned the tables and have her rescuing Sonic this time! I cannot wait to see what they have in store!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Metal Sonic was cool too btw)
ACTION - 10/10
TL;DR - Highspeed fun that has you on the edge of your seat for every single minute of screen time!
This movie is NONSTOP. I wasn't bored for a single second and by the time we hit the credits I couldn't believe how much time had passed. Every fight scene was so perfectly choreographed and so RAMPED UP that it had me stunned. There's a joke early in the movie that Sonic/Tails/Knuckles' antics are capable of cataclysmic events but the movie delivers on that promise a multitude of times! From city-wide power outages to mini-black holes to volcanic eruptions, there's no shortage of chaos and action in this movie!
You guys. The first time I saw this movie, I was at a prescreening so I was among critics and people from the media instead of a group of fans. It took EVERYTHING WITHIN ME to contain my glee. I was PHYSICALLY BALLED UP, knees pulled to my chest, palms pressed to my face to try to stay quiet. My heart burst through the roof of my skull! Even when I went to go see it for a fourth time, my heart was still racing. I actually had my friend feel my pulse as proof. This movie just gets you so excited it's insane!
The fact that the movie BEGAN with Shadow's breakout... god bless it. God bless everyone who worked on it. It was so intense and heartpumping! And I loved the choice to have little-to-no music during Shadow's fight with the soldiers. It just added to the tension and didn't give you any hint of when and where Shadow was going to teleport next. This was basically a scene from a horror movie! It set the entire tone for the film and showed that Shadow was NOT to be messed with.
I seriously could describe how much I loved every action scene but I will be here forever so I won't, but I have to say-
THE ✨SUPER✨ SCENES. OH. MY. 🎶GO~~~~OD🎶!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I had high hopes and expectations we were going to see Super Shadow in this one, but never in my lifetime did I think we were going to finally see Super Sonic VERSUS Super Shadow!!! Holy hell, what a fight! We get to finally see what two god-mode characters are capable of when they're out to kill each other and aren't showing any mercy. EACH PUNCH LAUNCHING THE OPPONENT ACROSS THE FREAKING PLANET?!??!?? That editing choice in particular is one of my absolute FAVORITE things about this movie. There's a million ways this fight could have been done but showing just how fast and how strong these two are--- even causing the earth to split open and erupt just from one of them pushing off the ground--really shows just how minuscule and inferior us humans are hahaha. We wouldn't stand a freaking CHANCE. AND SONIC PUNCHES SHADOW TO THE MOON?!
ALSO THEY EACH TOOK TURNS PUNCHING THE SUPER OUT OF EACH OTHER!???!!!
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I'm having to pause as I'm writing this because even though I've seen this movie four times I'm still getting so worked up just thinking about these action scenes again that I'm struggling to breathe omg
Even better than Super Sonic VERSUS Super Shadow was that final team up. That CLAP and they both turn super had me WEAK. I just about fainted right then but thank god I didn't because that entire sequence was INCREDIBLE. That little exchange of Sonic saying "Ready to recycle some tin cans?" and Shadow rolling his shoulder and saying "Try to keep up" before launching into a flurry of attacks is TATTOOED ON MY BRAIN. It will never leave my mind. It gave us SA2 and MORE. The battle was a masterpiece and it's something that words truly can't describe, you just have to witness it in all it's glory. I will never be normal about that fight scene.
One more moment I want to highlight because it shows action in nontraditional ways -- I am infatuated with the way they depicted Eggman and Shadow's last moments of saving the earth from the Eclipse Cannon. There was just something in the slow, labored movements that Jim Carrey made to show him attempting to block the explosions with shields, and the quietness of Shadow pushing the exterior of the ship with his hands and the metal is just crushing under his palms from the force. It isn't a moment of fast punches or flashing lights but it was so damn powerful and I absolutely loved it.
VISUALS - 10/10
TL;DR - Stellar effects and cinematography not only make for a delightful experience for your eyes but further immerse us into this fictional world.
WOW! I already touched on this in my above notes but seriously this movie was just beautiful. The character models were so good and felt real despite being cartoons (which goes to show you don't need them to look hyper-realistic to convince me it's a living creature). The lighting and the framing of shots were not only visually appealing but helped further the emotions of the scenes. The neon lights bouncing off Shadow in the rain as he's slowly walking down the streets of Shibuya was a WORK OF ART. Even all the moments of chaos and destruction were portrayed so well and so crisp that not only were they beautiful to look at -- I could actually tell what was going on! I watch a lot of action films and it gets so frustrating when there's so many explosions, lens flares, camera whips, etc that I can't actually make out what's happening. I never had that problem in this movie!
FAN SERVICE - 10/10
TL;DR - No, not that kind of fan service. This was a film FOR the fans!
I already said that the cinematic universe is clearly separate from the game universe. However, there were so many delightful little treats for fans of the games that felt like all the creators of this movie reached out and hugged me and said "This is for you!" BLESS! I won't list out all the Easter eggs and scene-recreations because there are too many, but man the joy I felt in sitting there and thinking "I KNOW THAT REFERENCE!" was healing to my soul. I figured "Live and Learn" was going to show up in some way because we heard the tune in the trailer, but I didn't realize how often and in how many different ways it would play throughout the movie! Starting out the movie with a memory of Maria playing "Live and Learn" on the guitar had me clutching my chest and I knew I was gonna be emotionally wrecked by this film! I loved the orchestral version of the song during the final battle which took an already badass theme and made it even more epic, but I do love that they included a snippet with the original lyrics too.
I don't know why people get so upset with these movies not being 100% like the games when it's clear that the people who work on these movies care so much about the games and want to reward us fans who love the games, too. Think about the scene where Shadow goes to push the Eclipse Cannon and he removes his inhibitor rings. That was specifically for us fans. The movie never explains what his inhibitor rings are or what they do or why he's removing them. Not knowing what the inhibitor rings are doesn't detract from the movie--but if you play the games you KNOW the significance of that moment. That was written and animated FOR YOU to enjoy. What's not to love about that???
DRAMAAAA~
Again, I know these SCU movies are marketed as family films and are more aimed for children, but I love that the movies are evolving and 'maturing' over time instead of repeating the same simple formula of some children's movies. With each Sonic movie that comes out, the themes and story are getting deeper and heavier without losing it's whimsy and fun. It's done in a way that feels like a natural progression and growth and I don't think the heavier subject matter will deter anyone who watched the previous two movies.
⭐BONUS POINTS!⭐
This is a hot take and I know many people are gonna disagree, but I was so pleased with there being LESS focus on the humans in this story (minus the Robotniks+Stone, of course). I do not care about the Wachowskis. I do not care about the Whipples. I understand why they were initially in the movies and I understand that Sonic considers the Wachowskis as his parents now, but I don't go to these movies to see the humans attending weddings or doing other sideplot shenanigans. I'm here for the aliens, damn it! So to have the humans' appearances mostly diminished to scenes that specifically related to the main plot was a huge relief to me!
THANK YOU SONIC 3.
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I could talk endlessly about this movie and even though I've written what feels like an entire essay there's still tons I'm leaving out, but to try to move this review along I'm going to move on to the negatives. Again, none of these below items were enough to ruin the movie for me and individually they aren't even worth a full point as far as a review. But ultimately these are things that I couldn't shake after watching and it's why I felt I had to dock the movie a single point in total.
EDITING WHIPLASH
I've already complimented this movie by several of the editing choices that were made, but there's one moment in particular that totally took me out of it and I'm sure you can guess what I'm going to say... Yes, it was the frequent cutting between the Super Hedgehogs and the Robotniks. Don't get me wrong -- individually these scenes were great. Ivo versus Gerald was hilarious and I did enjoy it and yes it was important to the plot -- but how DARE you interrupt my Super Sonic and Super Shadow fight with mustache wrestling! Whiplash is the best word I can use to describe how I felt in this moment. Sonic and Shadow fighting all of the robots and lasers to get to the Cannon was so dynamic and so intense and so spectacular, that when it suddenly cut away to Eggman getting spanked by a giant mech hand, I felt like I just got slapped across the face. My heart had just been racing so fast and then you cut away? Then I'm starting to calm down and just enjoy the Robotnik fight for the silliness but then it cuts BACK to the epic power of Sonic and Shadow --- and you do it AGAIN?! It just killed me!
I saw an edit somebody made where they spliced all of the super fight scenes together and removed the Robotnik fight and as you can imagine, it was infinitely better. You actually had the time to be fully enraptured by the battle and get to absorb every awesome second of it.
The Robotnik fight was still necessary (and yes, even the way they killed Gerald was hilarious to me and I still laugh even now) but they really should have edited this part of the movie better in my opinion.
PLOT HOLE -- ARE WE MISSING PART OF THE SCRIPT?
Although I think the writing for this movie was overall great, I felt there were key elements missing from the G.U.N. plot line that was meant to drive the narrative. This led me to think... was there a deleted scene and the filmmakers thought nobody would care/question it? Here are the things that I felt the movie did not clearly address:
1: Why are Team Sonic and Commander Walters close allies now? G.U.N. and Walters were previously antagonists in these films. Yes, at the end of Sonic 2 Commander Walters gives up his goal of capturing Sonic, but surrendering isn't the same as forming a partnership. Why is Team Sonic on-call for G.U.N. missions at Walters' requests all of a sudden? Then there's the scene in the Chao Garden. Why do Team Sonic and Walters meet up without anyone else from G.U.N. knowing about it? Why does Sonic trust Walters more than the rest of G.U.N.? I understand Sonic is a hero and especially in these movies he likes to see the good in people, but throughout these movies Walters ALWAYS lies. In Sonic 2, not only does Walters/G.U.N. fabricate an entire wedding as a sting operation to capture Sonic, but Walters lies when he claims that G.U.N. was formed because of Sonic's misadventures in San Francisco. In Sonic 3 we learn that G.U.N. was around for Project Shadow in the 70s. Nobody calls him out on this. Even in the Chao Garden scene, Walters is lying to Sonic about Shadow's history! He tells Sonic that Maria was killed in a terrible accident and Gerald was blamed for it. It was no accident! Soldiers showed up with guns and when Walters tried to stop them, they said "We have our orders." Sure, shooting the canister of chaos energy was not the intention and so the explosion itself was an accident, but those soldiers had every intent on taking Maria and Gerald out (if not Shadow as well). I'm sure Walters left that detail out to keep Sonic from asking further questions, but that makes him all the more of an unreliable storyteller and someone Sonic should NOT trust.
2: Why doesn't Walters trust G.U.N.? When Walters is injured in the Chao Garden attack, he gives Sonic one of the keys to the Eclipse Cannon and tells him that Sonic's the only person he trusts to keep it safe. Walters is the commander of G.U.N. -- surely he would trust a member of his team to hold onto the key, right? And if he doesn't, WHY? If you watched the Knuckles series then you know that there are indeed rogue members of G.U.N., but people watching the movie don't know that. Walters telling Sonic to keep the key safe from everyone suddenly puts Sonic on heightened alert and makes him believe he can't trust anyone, but we aren't given a reason why. Even if Walters simply had a line saying "I worry there's corruption in G.U.N." then I would have been satisfied.
3: Why is Team Sonic stealing the second key? Once the Team learns that there is a second key to the Eclipse Cannon and that the Robotniks are planning to steal it, they devise a heist to steal the second key themselves. Why? Walters didn't tell Sonic about a second key or tell him to retrieve the second key. Doesn't that mean Walters believes the safest place for the second key is where it's currently stored: at G.U.N. headquarters? Team Sonic knew Robotnik was en route, so the wisest option would have been to alert G.U.N. so they could heighten security and be on the lookout (which turns out, they already were). Again, all of this would make sense if Sonic was given an explicit reason to not trust G.U.N. and was specifically told to keep the keyS away from them, but at this point he went from trusting them to suddenly trying to take both keys from them. I loved the heist scenes and I don't want them removed, I feel they just need justification.
4: What is Director Rockwell's problem? It's clear that Rockwell is not a fan of Team Sonic (some people just can't trust aliens) but it seemed her character was going a certain direction and then just... stopped. After Walters is killed, the first thing she does is check his pocket for the key. Surely Walters would have known that Director Rockwell would have checked his pockets, especially since she was in Tokyo at the time of his death, again going back to my question of why he wouldn't trust her to retrieve the key instead of handing it over to Sonic? I was fully expecting a reveal of her being a rogue agent, especially because Team Sonic was still trying to take the second key even after the Robotniks had been thwarted. Think about it -- G.U.N. has stopped the Robotniks (and Team Sonic) from stealing the second key. That was the whole point, right? So why is Tom now trying to take the key FROM Rockwell? Isn't the key safely where it belongs and the Robotniks are supposedly in custody? So again, was there a reason Rockwell wasn't meant to be trusted, but we just don't know? I really felt like she was being set up to be a villain, but it led nowhere.
Now a lot of the elements I just addressed can be inferred and we can use context clues to guess, but I think it's the writers' job (especially in a family film) to make it clear why characters are making the choices/decisions they're making, at least by the time you reach the end of the movie. I know some stories are more ambiguous than others, but to me it felt like something was missing. I guess we'll see if there's anything hidden in deleted scenes.
FINAL THOUGHTS
As a whole, I absolutely loved this movie and I am so thankful it exists. I can't wait for Sonic 4 and I hope it receives just as much hype, love and attention that this movie did! If you read my entire review, thank you! I hope you enjoyed it, even if you didn't agree with all of it :)
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a-driftamongopenstars · 6 months ago
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alright, i finally finished Dragon Age the Veilguard.
tldr; 3/10. I didn't like it.
If you enjoyed the game and would rather keep enjoying it, please don't click the read more section as what follows is rather critical.
I can finally sit down with my thoughts and put them together in a more cohesive structured review, touching on most things that I wanted to address. I'll start with positives and then focus on the negatives.
Warning, this is VERY long.
Overall, I had a neutral to negative impression of DatV, which got worse by the end of the game. It had some good moments, but they were entirely unexplored and underutilized, suffering from bad writing. While the game itself is rather pretty, it didn't outweigh the dialogues, the stories and the lore butchering that took place.
1. Environment and visuals. 8/10.
I think Veilguard is a very beautiful game. I enjoyed exploring the corners of this new world, the little bits of environment design and storytelling that it had. It felt magical, certain locations were mesmerizing! I couldn't stop staring at the valley where you go to with Harding, the carcass of a titan.
2. Combat. 9/10.
I love flashy combat, I enjoy hack and slash, so until the very end of the game I was having most fun in combat. Yes there was repetitiveness but I tried to combat (hehe) it with changing my abilities and weapons every now and then. I liked combos and I liked timed parries. Enemy tactics got a bit boring by the end, but a few enemies still surprised me and challenged me.
.... That's where positives end. Now on to the negatives.
1. Characters. 2/10.
I don't understand what happened. Almost all the characters in this game were tuned down to a two-dimensional personality, "good" and "bad" - and absolutely no nuance. This happened not only to the villains, but to the different NPCs and even our companions. Their interests got narrowed down to single points of interest (Lucanis and coffee being a prime example to me), their motivations got watered down.
This is not what I expect from a Bioware game. I want to be challenged, I want to dislike characters or approve of their choices. I like characters who are messy and complex and don't always have their shit together.
I like villains who may have other reasons for their choices, other than "ba ha ha, I am so evil and I will do evil things". Where is Alexius who sold himself to the Elder one, just so he could save his beloved son? Where is Samson, forsaken by the Chantry and turned to red lyrium with his addiction? Where is Calpernia, misguided in her choices, just to free the slaves of Tevinter?
Where are the slaves of Tevinter anyway?? That's another topic.
2. Rook. 4/10.
On one hand, I liked playing Rook. They were stoic but with a humorous side, ready to get the job done, compassionate to other people.
The problem is that it's the only Rook you can really play. The protagonist is set in their ways and their dialogues and there is very little to roleplay. Rook really does feel like a gentle manager, trying to get everyone to play along nicely, while providing therapy every now and then, and is excluded from the majority of friendly interactions with other people. That awkward glance everyone gives you after their banter is embarrassing. The way you can third wheel people, the way the game actively offers you to leave a couple of animated conversations between other people - why even include those? Why not make Rook a part of the 'team'?
I did like Rook's dynamic with Solas. They got to see a different side of him, one that's not presented heavily in Inquisition. But like everything else, it felt surface level and underexplored.
3. Story arc. 2/10.
I am left unsatisfied with the story. The pacing threw me off so much nearly every quest, it was hard to stay on track. From "we need to solve this NOW" to "actually, let's all slow down and deal with our problems", the plot's priorities were all over the place. We kept hearing about the gods and their destructive oppression, but we saw surprisingly little of it. Yes, there was the Blight, yes there were Venatori and the Antaam, but they felt more like a video game fodder and dressing rather than a part of the story.
Not to mention that all of those things made little sense to me. Why would the gods align with aforementioned factions? Why would the aforementioned factions align with the elven gods? In-game explanation was not enough for me, it did not make sense. Not with the established lore in the previous games.
I also did not enjoy the ending. While the idea of Solas binding himself to the Veil is good and does make sense, what was suggested as the good ending (inviting Mythal to deal with Solas essentially) actually left me feeling awful. I sent a man, full of regrets and self-loathing, on a lonely journey to figure himself out. That... did not sit right with me at all. Neither did the fact that Northern Thedas, supposedly the point of the gods' attack, gets to live and flourish, while Southern Thedas is dying of starvation and blight. That is UNHINGED to me.
4. Music. 1/10.
There was no music. I remember one track. It was not memorable whatsoever and I can't believe they hired Hans Zimmer to do exactly nothing. Just wow.
5. Lore. ???/10.
And here is the worst offender. What was done with Dragon Age lore is unacceptable. I was doing a head-in-hands every five minutes. This was a slap in the face of so many fans who enjoyed the three prior games and delved into deep, interesting lore of various races, countries, cultures and religions. Veilguard showed a big middle finger to all that.
Everyone has already touched upon the sanitization of different factions. From the suddenly slaveless Tevinter to found family Antivan Crows, everything has been scrubbed clean and made sweet and palatable and "good".
The Dalish clans have been removed from existence as we know them. The Antaam left the Qun? Don't even get me started on that. The Chantry has no influence in this game? Really? The Chantry? The biggest religion in Thedas? The one that we know has heavy presence in the Anderfels, the Black Divine in Tevinter? That Chantry?
I think it really hit me how disrespectful the game is during the quest of saving the Dalish elves, where apparently Elgar'nan's Venatori, uplifted to be his servants and chosen people, were trying to sacrifice them. It's a gross and oddly telling idea that the ancient Elven god turned to a faction of racist mages to sacrifice elven people. I actually can't believe I'm writing this. Just how much are you going to shaft these people? Mindboggling.
There is a lot more I have to say on this specific topic, and I probably will later, but the idea is this.
6. Romances. 2/10.
Whoever said this is a game with romance lied so hard. So hard. The romance was atrocious. From the badly written flirting to the lack of romantic scenes (I romanced Davrin), to the poorly timed and awkward 'final' romance moment... It was atrocious. I felt no connection between Rook and Davrin beyond what game was telling me. My actual companions got more screen time with their romances than me and my LI.
Damn, even Evka and Antoine, my single most beloved NPCs in this game, had more romance going on that my Rook.
---
All in all, Veilguard was a massive let down. After having enjoyed the first 3 games many times over, with multiple playthroughs, I was so excited to see how the story of the Inquisition, of the elves, would end. When I saw the first trailer for VG, I knew I would never get to see it. When I played the game, I was left with disappointment and disdain.
I'm glad there are people who enjoyed this game, genuinely. I'm sure there's something to find for anyone, but it was not for me. Nor was it for many other people. It was a let down. I feel like I'll never get the conclusion I wanted - so I'll have to write my own I guess.
I have more thoughts on this game that I might be sharing, but for now this is the review I wanted to write. Thanks for reading!
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kittenan2 · 25 days ago
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This Could Be Us
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Pairing: Taehyung x Reader Tone: Chaotic comedy, emotional undercurrent, smut-heavy, revenge-flavored Genre: Smut, Humor, fluff, drama, rom-com, Arranged Marriage AU, Enemies-to-Lovers, Pining Idiot Taehyung Rating: Explicit (18+), Minors DNI Word Count: ~5k
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The living room smells like jasmine tea and misplaced optimism. Your parents have gone all out—freshly pressed hanboks, a tray of dainty rice cakes, and a nervous energy that could power a small city. Across from you, Taehyung’s parents sit, all smiles and practiced elegance, chatting about family traditions and “what a lovely match” this could be. They’re old friends with your parents, their bond forged over decades of shared vacations, business deals, and late-night soju sessions. This marriage proposal isn’t just a whim—it’s their dream of uniting their families, a plan they’ve whispered about since you and Taehyung were kids chasing each other around their summer villa. You’re in a soft pink hanbok, hair pinned neatly, legs crossed so tightly your knees might fuse together. You’re the picture of demure perfection, or so your mother insists.
Then he walks in.
Kim Taehyung. Late, naturally, because why would he respect anyone’s time? He’s wearing a tailored blazer, dark jeans, and sunglasses—sunglasses, indoors, like he’s auditioning for a K-drama villain. He’s holding an iced Americano, the condensation dripping onto your mother’s pristine rug. He doesn’t sit. He just stands there, leans against the wall, and gives you a once-over that lasts all of five seconds.
“Sorry,” he says, voice flat as a pancake. “She’s not my type.”
The room freezes. His mother gasps like she’s been personally attacked. Your father coughs into his tea. Your mother’s smile cracks like cheap porcelain. You? You’re staring at him, jaw slack, because what the actual hell, Kim Taehyung?
His father stammers, “Taehyung-ah, you can’t just—”
“I said what I said,” Taehyung cuts in, shrugging. He takes a loud sip of his Americano, turns, and struts out like he didn’t just detonate a social bomb.
Your cheeks burn. Humiliation claws at your chest. Not his type? You’re not vain, but you know you’re cute—big eyes, soft lips, a smile that’s gotten you free coffee more than once. And this art-boy wannabe with his pretentious coffee and designer sunglasses just dismissed you like you’re a clearance-rack sweater?
Oh, he’s going to regret this.
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You’re Y/N, but to the world, you’re VixenVows, the bestselling author of steamy erotic novels that make readers blush and clutch their Kindles. Your latest, Thighs and Lies, sold out faster than a boyband reunion tour. Taehyung’s rejection stings, but you channel it into something deliciously chaotic. Revenge is a dish best served with words.
It takes ten minutes to find his Instagram. Aesthetic posts of strawberry fields, shirtless gym selfies, captions like “Chasing strawberry skies 🍓.” Poetic gym bro energy. Then you spot it: his alt account, @TaeberryVibes, and oh ho ho, jackpot, liking every single one of your book announcements. You cross-reference the accounts. Same vibe, same strawberries. It’s him. He’s been reading your books for years, obsessed with VixenVows, but he has no idea you’re the same Y/N he just rejected. This man is obsessed with steamy novels. Specifically, your steamy novels. He’s left reviews like, “Page 147 had me questioning my life choices. 10/10, need a cold shower.” He’s even got a highlight reel of your book quotes, the filthiest ones.
You lean back, smirking. Kim Taehyung, you basic bitch, you thought I was too innocent? You, who jerks off to my words every night? Game on.
Your grin is feral. You open your laptop and write a 1,000-word smut POV fic, starring you and Taehyung, dripping with filth and defiance. You write:
His hands pinned my wrists above my head, the kitchen counter cold against my back. He tasted like strawberries and ego, lips grazing my throat as he growled, “Beg for it.” So I did, voice dripping with honey and defiance, “Make me.” His fingers slid down my thigh, teasing the edge of my lace panties, and I arched into him, whispering, “You’re not ready for me, Taehyung.”
You paste it into his DMs, signing it VixenVows (aka Y/N), with the caption: “This could be us, but you don’t want to marry me. Poor you. 😘”
Send.
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Taehyung’s at a café, sipping a strawberry shake, exuding his usual dominant aura—legs spread, phone propped casually, like he owns the place. His phone pings, and he opens Instagram, expecting a meme from Jimin. Instead, it’s you. The first line of your message hits like a sucker punch. He chokes, strawberry shake spraying across the table. His eyes widen as he scrolls through paragraphs of pure, unfiltered sin. Then he sees it: VixenVows (aka Y/N).
His brain short-circuits. You’re her. The innocent girl in the pastel hanbok, the one he dismissed as too soft, is the author whose books he’s devoured in secret, jerking off to her words under the covers. You’re not soft—you’re a fucking wildfire. And you just called him out.
He re-reads the fic, adjusting his pants, cheeks burning. The barista glares as he coughs again. He’s supposed to be dominant, in control, but your words have him unraveling. He types, deletes, types again. Finally:
“…Chapter 2?”
He hits send, heart pounding, knowing he’s in way over his head.
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Your book signing is a circus, the bookstore packed with fans screaming for VixenVows. You’re in your element—red lipstick, leather skirt, all sharp wit and confidence. Then you see him. Taehyung, in a black turtleneck and glasses, clutching a copy of Thighs and Lies like it’s his lifeline. He’s trying to play it cool, exuding that dominant energy he thinks defines him. He’s failing miserably. You rarely organize book signing events, only for most selling novels, and it's his first time at this event.
You lock eyes, and his facade cracks. You beckon him forward, the crowd parting. He shuffles up, book extended, muttering, “Big fan.”
“Oh, I know, Mr. Not My Type” you purr, signing his copy with a flourish. You lean closer, voice low. “He pushed me against the counter, tasting like strawberries and ego. Recognize that?”
His glasses fog up. He stammers, “I—I didn’t know it was you. You looked so… innocent.”
You laugh, sharp and wicked. “You thought I wasn’t your type? Baby, I’m everybody’s type.”
An hour later, you’re in the bookstore’s back office, door locked, air thick with tension. He’s pacing, running a hand through his hair, trying to reclaim his dominant edge. “You’re VixenVows,” he says. “You’re too… big for someone like me.”
You step closer, smirking. “You’re an idiot.”
He grabs your waist, pulling you against him, his voice low and rough. “A pining idiot,” he corrects, lips crashing into yours. It’s messy, desperate, all teeth and strawberry chapstick. You straddle him on a chair, skirt riding up, his hands gripping your hips like you’re his anchor.
“Still think I’m too innocent?” you tease, grinding against him.
He groans, head tipping back. “Shut up and ride my face, author-nim.”
You don’t. Not yet. Instead, you slide off, grab a pen, and edit a printed copy of your fic on the desk. “Your grammar’s shit in my DMs,” you say, smirking. He laughs, then yanks you back, kissing you until you’re breathless.
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That night, your phone pings. It’s him: Okay, you win. That was… wow. Can we talk?
You grin, typing back: Talk? Baby, I’m just getting started.
He’s hooked. He starts flirting. You play along. “Love your reviews,” you write. “Especially the one about page 147. Sounded personal.” He sends a string of flustered emojis.
His parents, oblivious to the chaos, arrange an “apology dinner” to smooth things over. You show up in a black dress that hugs every curve, neckline plunging just enough to make a statement. Taehyung’s in a white shirt, sleeves rolled up, looking like he stepped out of a cologne ad. He takes one look at you and chokes on his water.
You sit across from him, smirking. “Something wrong, Taehyung-ssi?”
He coughs, dabbing his mouth with a napkin. “You, uh… look different.”
“Oh?” You lean forward, letting a strap slip off your shoulder. “Not too innocent for you now?”
His eyes lock on your bare shoulder, then snap to your face. He’s sweating. “You’re doing this on purpose.”
You sip your wine, slow and deliberate. “Baby, you haven’t seen what I can do on purpose yet.”
Dinner is a disaster. He can’t stop staring at your legs. You quote a line in his ears from Thighs and Lies: “His fingers traced her thigh, teasing the edge of her lace, promising ruin.” Taehyung spills his water again. His mother thinks he’s having a stroke.
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Days later, he is back at your bookstore. The bookstore office is a cramped, overheated cocoon, the air thick with the scent of old paper, your jasmine perfume, and the faint sweetness of strawberries. The desk is a mess—scattered manuscripts, a half-eaten strawberry rolling precariously near the edge, and your book merch scarf, black silk with VixenVows in gold lettering, now tied tightly around your eyes as a blindfold. The silk is cool against your flushed skin, amplifying every sound, every touch, every breath. Your skirt is bunched around your waist, panties long gone, and you’re perched on the desk’s edge, thighs spread, heart pounding as Taehyung’s presence looms before you.
He’s on his knees, his rough hands gripping your hips, fingers digging into your flesh with a possessiveness that makes you shiver. His breath is hot against your inner thigh, teasingly close to where you’re already aching. “You wrote about this,” he growls, voice low and gravelly, his dominant facade cracking with raw need. “This exact fucking moment. You put me on my knees, Y/N, and now I’m gonna make you regret it.”
He drags a halved strawberry across your thigh, the juice dripping in a slow, sticky trail that feels like a brand against your skin. You gasp, the sensation sharp and cool, your body arching instinctively. His tongue follows, licking the juice with agonizing precision, each stroke deliberate, his lips brushing so close to your core you can feel the heat of his breath. “‘He tasted like strawberries and ego,’” he quotes, voice muffled against your skin, “‘unraveling me with every flick of his tongue.’ Fuck, you’re a genius, but I’m about to outdo your words.”
His oral fixation is a goddamn revelation. He doesn’t just lick—he devours, lips closing around the sensitive skin of your inner thigh, sucking hard enough to leave a mark. The strawberry’s juice mixes with his saliva, slick and sweet, and you’re trembling, fingers clutching the desk so tightly your knuckles ache. He teases higher, tongue tracing the crease where your thigh meets your core, and you whimper, hips bucking despite yourself.
“Taehyung,” you breathe, voice shaky, “stop fucking teasing.”
He chuckles, the sound vibrating against your skin, low and wicked. “Teasing’s my favorite part, author-nim. You wrote me like this—cocky, in control. Let’s see how long you last.” His fingers slide up, rough calluses grazing your hips as he hooks your legs over his shoulders, spreading you wider. You’re exposed, vulnerable, the blindfold making every touch a thousand times more intense. He blows a cool breath against your clit, and you jolt, a desperate sound escaping your throat.
“Beg for it,” he demands, echoing your fic, his voice a mix of command and desperation. He thinks he’s in charge, but you hear the tremor, the way he’s unraveling just as much as you are.
You laugh, defiant even as your body betrays you. “Make me.”
He growls, primal and feral, and then his mouth is on you, no more games. His tongue flattens against your core, licking a long, slow stripe from your entrance to your clit, and you cry out, the sound echoing in the tiny office. He’s relentless, alternating between soft, teasing flicks and deep, hungry strokes, his lips wrapping around your clit with a suction that makes your toes curl. His oral fixation is obscene—every lick, every suck, every nip calculated to drive you insane. He’s quoting your fic again, murmuring against your skin, “‘He unraveled me, tongue painting stories I’d never write.’ You’re gonna write this, Y/N. You’re gonna write how I fucking wrecked you.”
Your hands find his hair, tugging hard, and he moans, the vibration sending a fresh wave of pleasure through you. “Fuck, you taste better than I imagined,” he groans, pulling back just enough to squeeze another strawberry, letting the juice drip onto your folds. The cool liquid makes you gasp, but then his tongue is there, licking it up, mixing sweetness with your own heat. He’s messy, unhinged, lips and chin slick as he buries his face deeper, like he’s starving for you.
“You’re so wet,” he says, voice dripping with smug pride. “Didn’t even need the strawberry to make you drip like this.” His fingers join in, two sliding inside you with ease, curling against that spot that makes your vision white out behind the blindfold. “Tight as fuck,” he mutters, pumping slowly, stretching you as his tongue flicks your clit in perfect rhythm. “You wrote about me fucking you on a counter. This desk is gonna have to do.”
You’re a writhing mess, thighs trembling, blindfold amplifying every sensation—his rough fingers pumping, his lips sucking, the sticky strawberry juice he keeps dripping onto you just to lick it off. You’re begging now, despite your earlier defiance, words spilling out in a desperate chant. “Tae, please—fuck, I need more, need you—”
He stands abruptly, and you whimper at the loss, but then his lips crash into yours, the kiss filthy and urgent, all tongue and teeth. You taste yourself, the strawberries, his ego, and it’s intoxicating. His hands yank your shirt up, shoving your bra down to expose your breasts. His mouth latches onto a nipple, sucking hard, teeth grazing just enough to make you hiss. “You’re gonna come on my tongue first,” he says, voice rough, “then I’m fucking you until you can’t walk.”
He drops back to his knees, and you’re done for. His tongue is a weapon, circling your clit with precision, his fingers curling faster, harder, hitting that spot with every thrust. He adds a third finger, the stretch making you gasp, and when he sucks your clit hard, you shatter. Your orgasm crashes through you, thighs clamping around his head, hands clawing at his hair as you scream his name, loud enough to rattle the office walls. The bookstore’s music is no match for you, and you’re vaguely aware that the staff probably heard everything.
He doesn’t stop, licking you through the aftershocks until you’re oversensitive, pushing at his shoulders. “Tae, fuck, enough—”
“Not enough,” he growls, standing, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. His glasses are fogged, hair a mess, and he’s already unzipping his pants, rolling on a condom with practiced ease. You’re still catching your breath when he grabs your hips, pulling you off the desk and spinning you around. “Hands on the desk,” he orders, and you obey, still blindfolded, ass up, legs shaking.
He doesn’t make you wait. He slides into you in one smooth thrust, thick and deep, filling you so perfectly you both groan. “Fuck, Y/N,” he gasps, hands gripping your hips so hard you’ll bruise. “You feel—fuck, so good.” You push back against him, meeting his thrusts, and he curses, his dominant facade crumbling as he loses himself in you.
You grab his phone, still open to your fic, where he was adding his own imagination. You start editing, smirking even as he fucks you senseless. “Comma here,” you say, voice breathy, rolling your hips to take him deeper.
“Fuck your commas,” he snaps, but he’s grinning, thrusting harder, the desk creaking under you. You whisper lines from your fic, voice dripping with filth: “‘He fucked me like he was rewriting my story, every thrust a new chapter.’” He groans, one hand sliding up to pinch your nipple, the other gripping your ass as he pounds into you.
“Say it,” he demands, voice hoarse. “Say you’re mine.”
You laugh, defiant even now. “Make me.”
He does. He reaches around, fingers circling your clit with the same precision as his tongue, and you’re gone again, your second orgasm hitting harder than the first, your walls clenching around him. He follows, thrusting deep, groaning your name like a prayer as he comes, his hands shaking on your hips.
You’re sprawled on the table, dress ruined, lips swollen. Taehyung’s beside you, hair a mess, shirt half-unbuttoned. “Marry me,” he says, breathless.
You blink. “Excuse me?”
“Don’t act shy now.” He grins, lazy and sated. “You broke me. You win. I want to wake up next to my favorite writer every morning.”
You cackle, shoving him. “We’ll see if you survive Chapter 24 first.”
He pulls you close, kissing your forehead. “Deal.”
“No more fiction,” he says, stepping closer, voice low enough that only you can hear. “I want the real thing. Marry me. Then destroy me, slowly, every night for the rest of my life.”
You raise an eyebrow, “Only if you say ‘I do’ in bed first.”
He grins, that cocky, dominant edge creeping back. “Deal.”
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The next few weeks are a whirlwind of awkward small talk, your mom and Mrs. Kim debating color schemes (pastel pink or ivory?) while Mr. Kim grills Taehyung about his art career and “when he’s going to settle down properly.” You and Taehyung keep stealing glances, your foot brushing his under the table, his hand grazing your thigh when no one’s looking. The tension is electric, your body still buzzing from the bookstore office, his touch a promise of more. When your parents start discussing guest lists, Taehyung leans over, whispering, “I’m gonna fuck you in that pink hanbok later,” and you nearly choke on your tea.
The door barely closes behind the both of your parents—going market for wedding preparation—before Taehyung’s on you, backing you against the wall. His lips crash into yours, hungry and desperate, tasting of the mint gum he was chewing to stay calm. “You’re trouble,” he murmurs, hands sliding under your sweatpants, fingers teasing the edge of your underwear. “Fucking lethal.”
You laugh, tugging his hair. “You love it.”
He lifts you, your legs wrapping around his waist as he carries you to the couch. The hanbok fantasy doesn’t happen—yet—but he’s already pulling your sweatpants off, kissing down your neck, muttering, “I’ve been hard since you opened the door looking like a hot mess.” You’re both laughing, then moaning, as he makes good on his promise, fucking you slow and deep, whispering filthy praise about how you’re his favorite author, his favorite everything. The living room smells like jasmine tea and sex by the time you’re done.
The wedding planning is chaos—strawberry-themed cocktails, your mom insisting on a five-tier cake with edible flowers, Taehyung’s parents pushing for a traditional hanbok ceremony to honor their friendship with your family. Your fans catch wind of the engagement when you post a cryptic Instagram story: a strawberry with the caption “He said yes 🍓.” Twitter explodes, theories flying that Taehyung’s your muse. You neither confirm nor deny, but when Strawberry Mistakes drops, a novel dripping with scenes inspired by your own story, it breaks sales records. Taehyung reads it to you in bed, his voice husky, pausing to reenact your favorite parts until you’re both a sweaty, satisfied mess.
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Years later, you’re married, sprawled on a plush velvet couch in Taehyung’s apartment—now yours too. The walls are a chaotic gallery of your worlds: your books, spines worn from his constant rereading, sit beside his vibrant paintings, abstract strawberries and soft pinks blending into raw, emotional strokes. You’re editing your next novel, laptop balanced on your thighs, red pen tucked behind your ear, while Taehyung kneels between your legs, painting strawberries on your skin with a fine-tipped brush. The edible paint is sweet, sticky, and he takes his time, dragging the brush in slow, teasing strokes across your inner thigh, then up to your navel, drawing a heart that makes you roll your eyes.
“Still think I’m too innocent?” you tease, tapping your pen against the laptop, smirking as you catch him staring at the curve of your hips.
He laughs, low and warm, licking a stripe of paint off your thigh, his tongue deliberate and teasing. “Innocent? You’re a fucking menace, Mrs. Kim.” He pauses, dipping the brush in more paint, tracing a spiral around your hipbone. “And I’m obsessed. Always have been. Your books, your mouth, this—” He presses a kiss to the painted heart, then bites gently, making you gasp. “I’m fucked for anyone else.”
You set the laptop aside, pulling him up for a kiss. It’s slow, deep, tasting of strawberries and forever. His hands slide under your shirt, rough and warm, tugging it off so he can paint more, his brush dancing across your collarbone, spelling out Vixen in delicate strokes. “You’re my everything,” he murmurs, kissing the word, his lips soft but his eyes dark with that dominant edge you love. “Every painting, every fucking thought—it’s you.”
The world outside doesn’t exist—just you, him, and the life you’ve built. Your novels keep breaking records, your fans screaming at every signing, especially when Taehyung shows up, looking at you like you hung the moon. He’s your partner, your critic, your favorite reader—especially when he’s reading your smut aloud, his voice husky, pausing to add his own filthy commentary. “This part,” he’ll say, flipping to a scene where the hero fucks the heroine against a window, “we’re doing this tonight. Non-negotiable.”
Later, you’re tangled in bed, sheets sticky with paint and sweat. He’s got Strawberry Mistakes in one hand, reading a particularly filthy passage—“He fucked her like she was his last breath, desperate and reverent, her moans a symphony he’d never tire of.”—while his other hand traces lazy circles on your back. “You wrote this about us,” he says, voice rough, tossing the book aside to pull you on top of him. “Let’s give your readers something new to scream about.”
You grin, straddling him, teasing him with a slow grind. “Only if you say ‘I love you’ first.”
He flips you onto your back, pinning your wrists, his lips brushing yours as he whispers, “I love you, you chaotic, brilliant, lethal woman.” The world fades to strawberry skies, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. Taehyung’s now your biggest stan, posting your books with captions like, “My wife’s words will ruin you. Read at your own risk.”
His mom texts you: “I always knew you two were perfect together.”
You reply: “He took some convincing.”
Taehyung, reading over your shoulder, smirks. “Lies. You seduced me with literature.” You roll your eyes, but your heart’s full. Plot twist, baby—he’s all yours.
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A/n: Thanks to my insta, which keeps dropping this weird POVs in my feed, forcing me turn them into whole dame oneshots. 😈
P.S.: I know so many reqquests are pending, I will work on them soon. Love y'all. 💜
Taglist: @the-djarin-clan . @jeonjamiekim . @moonjinniecafe  . @minpdrecs . @bontensbabygirl . @this-most-assuredly-counts . @taolucha . @mytaegiheart . @dear-mono . @lilyficrec . @janeluvwonuuuu . @k-fan-fics . @iztrouble . @pikajooni . @namluvili . @alonahh . @paradise172 . @stay-tiny-things . @micdropitlikeitshot . @softhaes . @littlebluhellfire . @niqueesthings . @nocturnalsingularity . @syudoeslove . @namjoonbaby17-blog . @mar-lo-pap . @naesarang07 . @diame93 . @themwordsblog . @crizoosblog
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gazemaizeisdead · 2 months ago
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i just got out of an early screening of the minecraft movie! (a minecraft movie), and i come to reveal, the mad oracle that i have become:
it will gross two billion dollars. you’re in a bubble if you think otherwise. this is NOT a 1/10, it’s a 3/10 that the average brainrotted american child will perceive as the funniest movie in the world and that’s all it needed to be to make two billion dollars. they play guns n roses and ac/dc. the white lotus lady shows up and plays the white lotus lady and has a minecraft dui. this will narrowly scrape a 50 to 60 critic score on rotten tomatoes. they will compare it to the lego movie (every review will mention the lego movie). “THE KIDS WILL LOVE IT AND PARENTS MAY JUST CRACK A FEW SMILES THEMSELVES!” the villains want to destroy creativity and there’s a line where the main villain says “we are only in this for the money and to destroy creativity” and every reviewer that miraculously doesn’t compare this to the lego movie will quote this line at the end and smugly cross their arms and mutter wow they sure are telling on themselves and the ones that don’t do that will say that it’s too woke.
i don’t have a critical take on a minecraft movie, i don’t have a real analytical thesis or an essay or an unfunny shitty single sentence pseudo-tweet letterboxd review i have a vision like the opening of a final destination movie. but i’m not going to yell at you to get off the coaster. i’m not going to get off myself. we go when we go. better this than the tanning bed.
he sings again. he sung as bowser and he sung as claptrap and he sings as steve. they’ll put him in fnaf 2 and he’ll sing as balloon boy and he’ll sing as tingle in zelda and he’ll sing as kraid and andrew ryan and big the cat.
nacho libre is a fake wes anderson film about class struggle and the glorification of god (and is better than every film wes anderson has ever made) and jack black sings in that movie and i laughed so hard at that as a kid that i pissed myself. not a dribble, i pissed my pants and sat there in the theater and didn’t say anything because i didn’t want to get taken out of the theater early because i was afraid i wouldn’t get to see the rest. i also pissed myself watching the minecraft movie this morning as an adult but it was a protest piss. the theater employees will taste the difference and i hope that my message works its way up the chain, in whatever way it can, and maybe someday jack black will be in a good movie again.
four and a half stars
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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 8 months ago
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compos mentis 3
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No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.
Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, chronic health issues, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: After a long court case, your mother stays attached to her lawyer, bringing even more contention into your life.
Characters: Andy Barber
Note: cut my life into pieces, this is my worst villain.
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.
Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.
I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖
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Andy shows you to the guest room. It’s big. Much bigger than your own.
Rather, yours is overcrowded with collectible figurines of women in big gowns and books about vintage fashion. When you were less exhausted, you would cut out the pictures and make collages. It’s been ages since you did anything more than lay around. 
He leaves you to take it in. The bed frame is birch, the bedding all white, without a single wrinkle, the nightstands match the bed, and there’s a beige rug across the floor. There’s a book shelf against one wall, a window in the other, and an armchair in the corner. Simple but nice. 
You roll your tank across the floor as you hear Andy coming up the stairs. He peeks in as you turn to see him carrying your mom. He nods as he passes by. A door opens further down the hall. You feel too unsettled to lay down even if you are tired. 
He returns and peers around the door frame as he taps with his knuckles. 
“Here, I just realised you don’t have any clothes here,” he holds a folded tee. “Let me know if you need anything else.” 
“Thanks,” you keep your tank on the hardwood as you cross to him. You take the shirt and clutch it under your arm. 
“The bathroom’s right across the hall,” he points with his thumb over his shoulder. “Did you need some water or anything?” 
You shake your head, “thank you. No, I’m alright. Just need to... rest.” 
“Of course. Any extra blankets? The AC too much?” He asks. 
You shrug, “I’m fine.” 
He smiles softly, “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be overbearing I just want to make sure you’re comfortable.” 
“That’s okay,” you assure him and back up. “Really, I can handle it.” 
“Alright, but please don’t hesitate to ask for anything, alright, sweetheart?” 
You turn and put the shirt on the bed, “okay. Thanks.” 
He lingers in the door. He’s watching you. His gaze hangs over you like a shroud. Slowly, he reaches for the handle and shuts you in. At last, you can breathe. Well... 
You slip the tube from around your nose as you change. You sit as you pull on the tee, keeping your flowery cotton briefs on. You loop the tube around your ears again and set it right. You feel woozy from the effort. 
You turn off the light and shuffle cautiously through the dark. You put your tank to the side of the bed and stretch the tube. You lay down and let your eyes close. Your fatigue descends faster than you expect. 
There’s some noise from outside your walls, but you don’t think much of it as you drift off. You wake up still on your back. You’ve trained yourself not to move much lest you get tangled up. All the water you had with dinner has you squirming. 
You drag yourself up and fix your tube. You stub your toe on the take as you get out of bed and groggily stumble around. For a moment, you go into autopilot and collide with the end of the bed, thinking it to be much smaller. You’re not at home, you remind yourself. 
You wheel the tank behind you and open the door. You cross the hall to the open bathroom and dip inside. You park the wheels under the tank and do what you need to, the seat cold, the tile even colder. 
You wash your hands and look at yourself in the mirror. You don’t do that often. Under your nose is chafed, your lips are chapped, and your eyes are sunken. You’ve never been pretty, just sick. You always wanted to be beautiful like the glass women you kept in your room. You don’t know why you’re thinking of that now. 
You shut off the light before you open the door and step out into the darkness. You don’t get far as you hear a grunt and your tank lurches over a bump. You stop and squeak as the shadow backs up and grumbles. A switch flicks and the overhead light glows. 
You face Andy in surprise, “I’m sorry, I didn’t realise--” 
“No, no,” he grimaces and wiggles his foot. “I shouldn’t be creeping around in the dark.” 
He chuckles and pushes back his hair, it’s tussled, and his beard has uneven lines in it. More concerningly, he’s almost naked. He only wears a pair of grey boxers. His chest is thick with hair that trails down his stomach, and his shoulders are rounded with muscles. He somehow seems even bigger in that moment. 
You lean back, about to tip. You’ve never seen a man like that in the flesh. You’ve never been that close to such a bare man. Even when you see it on screen, it makes you squirm and heat up. 
“It’s... It’s... I’m sorry.” 
You turn and hit your tank with your leg. It slips and wobbles before it clunks over. You trip over the wheels and tumble forward. You squeak as a tight vice closes around your arm and keeps you from hitting the floor. 
Andy pulls you steady to your feet and you turn to stare at his hand. He’s touching you. No one touches you. Only your mom and she only does that when she wants to make a show. You stare at his knuckles and he slowly lets go. 
You stand frozen. He bends down to lift the tank back to its wheels and he looks it over. He turns his ear towards it. 
“I don’t hear a leak.” He says. 
“Yeah, it’s fine,” you insist and grab the handle. “Thanks.” 
“Hey, but what about you, honey? You okay?” 
“Yep,” you cough and veer the tank across the hall with you. 
You don’t look back. You're embarrassed. Especially as you shut the door and realise you’re in little better state than him. You have the tee shirt and your frumpy underwear on. Oh gosh, that’s horrible. He saw you like that. 
💚
You wake up and get dressed in the same clothes you wore the night before. All in all, you’ve been awake for most of the time there. Strange places make you wary. Even hospitals, as often as you’ve been there, keep you on edge. 
After you get your meds from your belt bag, you sit on the bed and stare at the window. Your mom will be up eventually and you’re sure she won’t want to hang around unless Andy is there. He must have work, right? 
You hear movement in the hallway. It could be her. You hope it is. You listen to the footsteps descend the stairs and minutes later return. There’s a back and forth in the hall and through the house once more. Yet you don’t hear voices. 
A knock comes at the door and you make your way over. You’re not surprised to find Andy on the other side, only disappointed. He’s in a pair of slacks and a button-up. He must be near ready to go. 
“Hey, checking on you,” he puts his hand on the door frame. You glance at it. You won’t be able to close it. “Everything okay? I put coffee on.” 
You nod, “okay. I don’t drink coffee. Thanks. Too much caffeine.” 
“Oh, I should’ve remembered that,” he puts his other hand on his hip. “Well, your mom isn’t doing too well. She’s hungover. I did mention about the wine.” 
“Uh, I... I’m sorry,” you frown. 
“Sorry? Why?” He tilts his head, “you don’t have to apologise for her. It’s the consequences of her own behaviour.” 
You shrug. You guess it’s a habit. You’re always the one apologising to the nurses or the service workers or just the last person she decided to argue with. 
“Yeah...” you murmur. 
“Well, I can make you some breakfast? I have some muffins. You like blueberry?” 
“It’s okay. I’ll just wait for mom,” you pick at the hem of your shirt. 
“Alright, but I think she might not be up for a while. Even then, I don’t know if she’s going anywhere.” He glances over his shoulder. “How about, I’ll leave a muffin out for ya and you can have it if you get hungry? I got a short day, I won’t be gone very long but you get full rein of the house when I’m out. Keep your mom safe, huh?” 
You blink at him. You can’t quite process what he’s saying. More his tone than his words. He’s talking to you in this sickly sweet voice. Is he trying to be fatherly? You don’t need a dad and he didn’t need you either. 
“Right, I...” you shift on your feet. “I’ll just lay back down. My head hurts.” 
“You sure you’re not hungry? I can get you some coffee before I go?” He offers. 
You shake your head, “no thanks, “ you wisp out, “er, have a good day, Andy.” 
“I’ll try, sweetie,” he surprises you as he moves his hand from the door frame swiftly. You can’t react as he reaches for you. He cradles around the back of your head and leans in to kiss your forehead. “You too.” 
He pets your head before he pulls away. You’re too stunned to speak or move. You squeeze the handle on your tank and your chest starts to split. You have to breathe! 
He steps back with a grin and turns to strut away. You watch after him. Was that... well, no, it’s... it can’t be anything. He’s just being him? He’s with your mom now so technically when they marry... that’s it.  
You just don’t know any better. You’re stupid. You’ve never even dreamed of having a man interested in you that you confuse the most innocent things for more. It’s not that. He’s being nice. If anything, he just feels sorry for you like everyone else. 
When he disappears down the stairs, you finally get some sense back. You shut the door and go back to the bed. You’re dizzy and a bit queasy. You lay down and watch the ceiling. If your mom isn’t up in an hour, you’ll have to go find her. 
You can’t stay like that. Despite the shadow of exhaustion that always follows you, you’re restless. You get up and make sure the bed is tidy. You fold the used tee shirt and check to make sure you tank hasn’t left any marks on the floor or carpet. 
Alright then, that’s enough waiting. You peek into the hallway before you emerge. You go down to the door where you think she is. You can’t remember which one now. You knock and wait. She doesn’t answer so you hit the door harder, making yourself flinch. 
You hear a grumble. You stand in indecision. Should you just let her be? Well, you don’t want to be here all day. You rub your forehead then rip your hand away. Right there, where he kissed you... 
You drop your hand to the door handle and push inward. Your mother is shrouded in darkness, the curtains are drawn, and she groans. You sniff and stay close to the threshold. 
“Mom, are you okay? It’s almost nine--” 
“Go away,” she gurgles. 
“Mom, we have to go home.” 
“Oh, shut up. Go. Fuck, my head is pounding,” she rubs her head and writhes. 
“Mom?” You squeak. She can be harsh but she doesn’t swear at you like that. “Can I help--” 
“Leave me alone,” she rolls her back to you, “you’re making it worse.” 
You frown and look at her. You were just trying to help her. You know you’re useless but you don’t mean to be. You back out and roll the tank with you. When you close the door, you jump at the figure along the edge of your sight. You turn to Andy as he stands just down the hall. 
How long has he been there? 
“Told you, she’s in rough shape,” he says. “Well, good and bad news. My case for this morning got pushed. Lawyers put in a request so I’m gonna work from home so if you need anything, I’ll be around.” 
“Oh, uh, right,” you hunch and shrink toward the wall. 
He nods and smiles softly. You’re both silent, stuck in a strange valley of uncertainty. He clears his throat. 
“She shouldn’t talk to you like that, you know? I’ll... I’ll tell her that.” He says. 
You shake your head frantically, “no, don’t do that.” 
“But she shouldn’t--” 
“Please. She’s just not feeling good,” you insist and roll toward him. “It’s fine. Just... I need to sit down.” 
He lets you pass and you dip back into the guestroom. You click the door shut and heave out a long breath. You just want to be at home. Everything here feels so weird. 
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nightlark100 · 2 months ago
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Alpha Pack Vs Hale Pack: Further adventures of Stiles Stilinski and Kevin the Demon Wolf 🐺
Derek: I thought Stiles was cooking tonight?
Peter: huh? Oh yes, he was supposed to. But he got kidnapped.
Derek: What?!
Isaac: Alpha pack took him
Derek: And the two of you are... waiting for a ransom demand?
Peter: We were actually waiting for Deucalion to call us begging for us to pick up our human. He'll probably be back in time for dinner but we might want to order pizzas just in case
Isaac: We have bets on how long it'll take. Boyd says it'll be max a few hours before they flee the town to get away from him.
Derek: Boyd knows too? Where is he?
Isaac: He went to the movies. He wanted to avoid Stiles tagging along, figured now was the best time.
Derek: He went to the movies while his pack mate was kidnapped
Isaac: Uh huh.
Peter: In fairness Nephew, the boy does get kidnapped at least once every few months. Even I kidnapped him!
*Derek pinches the bridge of his nose and resists the urge to bang his head against the wall*
--------------------------------------------------
*Stiles wakes handcuffed to a chair*
Stiles: Eurgh just once I'd like to wake up on a tropical vacation. Why do people keep doing this... is there some kind of yelp reviews for kidnapping victims and I'm just getting super high ratings? Ahh well... KEVIN GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE, I KNOW THIS IS YOU
Deucalion: Perhaps you should remember that you are in a position of vulnerability here, Mr Stilinski, and refrain from your usual level of sass
Stiles: oh that was me being restrained. And I would hardly call this a position of vulnerability
Deucalion: You're tied to a chair in an abandoned building with five alpha werewolves
Stiles: I choose to view it as five alpha werewolves are trapped in an abandoned building with me. What is with the abandoned building obsession anyway? Like, with Derek I get it. He was being broody Mcbrooderson and needed somewhere derelict from which to glare dramatically at passersby. But you? I expected better. I mean, if you're going to commit to this whole being a villain, you need to go all in. I don't see a single mounted skull of an enemy or even a dramatic chair for you to sit in and monologue from. Hell, the only piece of furniture in here is this chair and it's... Honestly, it's kinda comfy. Hmm.
Deucalion: I-
Stiles: Oh and by the way? You really should cut your losses and try again somewhere else. Derek is never going to buy into your whole GRR I AM ALPHA HEAR ME ROAR nonsense. I mean, you guys should get an image consultant or some kind of PR cause the whole offer sucks. And I get that you're embracing the idea of 'you catch more flies with manure than honey' with the grade A bullshit you're shoveling but it's such a weak pitch. Actually, maybe you should skip the rebrand and look at why you feel the need to pretend to be a monster.
Deucalion: wh... pretend?!
Stiles: Seriously. Peter didn't lean this hard into villainy and he was, by all accounts, an asshole before he went feral. Which is actually a shame cause he would have had an awesome evil lair. Ahh well, next time, next time. Anyway I'm getting distracted. My point was, you were apparently quite chill as an alpha before everything. You wanted peace and love and rainbows and fluffy kittens. I don't know what Brawny and the chiropodists nightmare had going on but I do know no one does a complete 180 on their personality without deeper issues. And I do get that you were in a horrible position, you'd just lost your vision, quite a few pack members and one betrayed you. That's enough to mess anyone up. But you still had some pack left, you had people you cared about and you just...
Deucalion: You're not a wolf. You couldn't understand the power that comes from killing your betas.
Stiles: I know Derek is much stronger with us than without us. No magical cure all power boost needed for him, just 100% pure alpha. Wait... is that it? Jeeze... I should have realised! It's nothing to be ashamed of, it is completely natural for a man your age to feel the need to... Compensate.
Deucalion: 😳
Stiles: But you need to take your midlife crisis out of my town. It was mildly amusing at first but now you're just getting obnoxious. We have exams coming up, can't be dealing with your nonsense. Just count yourself lucky that I'm too busy studying and not booting you out myself.
*Stiles sighs and pulls his hands free of the handcuffs he'd undone while talking, getting to his feet*
Stiles: But in all seriousness, you don't need more power, you never did. What you need is therapy. Just... All the therapy. And maybe a hug.
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kaija-rayne-author · 6 months ago
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The elves 'needed a win' in Dragon Age Veilguard, huh?
Obligatory 'I'm not an asshole' disclaimer. Feel free to jump to the cut if you've read it.
Something came to my attention. I need to make it crystal clear that I utterly love the diversity in DAV. It's fantastic. I'm also a heavily left leaning, non-binary, queer as fuck reviewer, editor, and author.
I was on media blackout while I played DAV. Please be safe and take care of yourselves. Arguing with incels and white supremacists is completely pointless. They sea lion worse than an actual sea lion. Your mental health is important.
Though, every single time the anti-queer brigade comes out for a new DA game, I sit there thinking 'have you bozos ever played any DA game, like, ever?' My guess is nope.
Note. None of my writing on DA, but especially DAV, is edited. This is just my off the cuff writing. I don't have the time, energy, or heart to edit them properly.
Grab a drink of preference, walk the dog, then find a comfy spot, this is gonna be a long one.
I'm referring to a quote of John Epler's. Creative Director for DAV at BioWare in this Polygon article.
"elven historian Bellara Lutare and Grey Warden Davrin, come from Dalish clans themselves and even though they’re a little shaken about confronting their gods, they’re not conflicted about doing so. In fact, among Elgar’nan and Ghilan’nain’s lackeys and puppets, there’s not a single elf to be found. Epler said that it’s vindication for the Dalish — which is nice to see considering how they’ve been portrayed in past games."
Okay. Let’s think about this first part. Epler says it's vindication for the elves and how they've been treated in previous games. You know? Ever since I read that article, confusion has just run around in my head. How? How can absolutely anything that happened in DAV be considered as ‘vindication of the elves’?
Firstly, I'm not sure if vindication is the best word for the concept he's going for. Vindication means to Justify, Confirm, Substantiate, or Avenge. I can't honestly see how any of the events in DAV do even one of those things for the elves.
You know what it really is? It's not anything good, regardless of which transitive verb you use. It's just bad writing. Like absolutely awful, pretty deeply racist, terrible writing.
You’re trying to actually have me believe that within the entire race of elves, city elves, Dalish, veil-jumpers, enslaved elves (who we conveniently don’t see at all in DAV, even though we spend time in Tevinter… the capital of enslaved elves…) there aren’t some who would follow Elgar’nan and/or Ghilan’nain? At least for a little while? The enslaved elves wouldn’t follow their old gods if they promised to free them? Really?
More realistically, there would be a schism within the elves. Some would follow the returned gods, some would deny them, and some would be like fuck this, I have halla to feed or floors to scrub.
Having the gods return would be a world shaking event on every front. Not just in the Disney villain mustache twirling way, like in DAV. But also culturally, religiously, anthropologically.
Every single elf in the entire elven race is ‘good’? There aren’t any who are power hungry? (Raises an eyebrow at Zathrian DAO.) No power hungry, not exactly ‘good’ elves, huh? Riiiiiight.
Would some, maybe even most, change their minds once they realized what Elgar’nan and Ghilan’nain really were? Of course, there would be some. But there would be just as many who might stick with their gods.  For so many reasons. Revenge, greed, desire for power, unwavering fanatical faith... I could keep listing reasons for a while. That's just, realistically, how intellectual beings behave. There wouldn’t be any elves on that entire continent that wouldn’t throw their fists up in victory, and shout, ‘Yes! Finally! Let’s squash Tevinter first, then Orlais.’?
Really? Isn’t that kinda reducing the existence of elves to the same old fashioned child ‘not to be seen or heard’ thing? It’s infantalizing an entire race.
That’s both so naïve it’s sad and so disrespectful of the elves as intellectual beings with free will.
And how would most elves even know that the two returned gods were, y’know, returned? Much less that they’re actually mustache twirling bad guys a la Disney? (I could personally think of a few ways, but they weren’t shown or even mentioned that I saw in game.)
THEDAS is depicted as a fantasy medieval-esque world. Communication is depicted by courier and letters. The travel time alone would mean that most elves wouldn’t have a clue about even the return of the gods, much less their character. There’s nothing shown in the games that I can recall that covers this.
It’s unrealistic that even Bellara and Davrin know they’re evil until a few story quests in, leading to the second act. They just automatically know? How?
It’s already firmly established in Dragon Age Lore that the elves will willingly, some even happily, leave behind everything to serve an ancient Elvhen God. Even one with dirt, blood, mistrust, and disgust directed at him for millennia.
In the end pages of DAI, it’s clearly shown that elves leave their current circumstances to go serve Solas. Fen’harel, The Dread Wolf, The elven trickster god. The most utterly despised God of all of them has an extremely large following of elves. (Who we don’t see anything of in DAV, convenient, no?)
And we have a retcon from our dearly talented /s John Epler on that from /theplaydragonage reddit group. Paraphrased, Solas decided to work alone because he hated being a leader. He didn’t care about the elves. Somewhere between DAI and DAV the elves sworn to Solas sparkle glitter farted poof into the ether’
You know? That’s just so uneducated on how intellectual beings work that I’m not going to dignify it with a response.
And there are so many quotes from Solas about truly caring about the elves in Inquisition and supplementary materials that it's an utterly ridiculous Solas-hater thing to say.
So, why in all the worlds wouldn’t elves want to serve Elgar’nan, All-Father, the Eldest of the Sun, He Who Overthrew His Father, The Father of Retribution? He represents promise before acceptance. The power before the price. The moment of choice that precedes justice or vengeance, rise or fall.
Why wouldn’t they want to follow Ghilan’nain? Mother of the halla and Goddess of Navigation. The price and acceptance of purpose, and the becoming that allows no return. Betrayal and devotion are as equals to her.
Many, many elves throughout the history of the Dragon Age franchise have been depicted as extremely faithful to their gods, especially amongst the Dalish.
They stoned Solas and drove him away when Solas tried to tell the truth about them to at least one Dalish clan. It’s why Solas isn't particularly fond of the Dalish. If you stoned me for trying to tell you the truth of a thing, I doubt I'd like you very much either.
It really just feels like self-insertionism on Epler's part. Or poorly thought out ideas suitable to a first draft that any decent editor would've suggested get scrapped. Or maybe a bad case of CYA (cover your ass). I honestly have no idea whether Epler is faithful to any religion, agnostic, or atheist, nor do I care, it isn't anyone's business but his.
But the writing and actions surrounding both Bellara and Davrin, as well as the elves in general, feel like a modern atheist trying to self-insert their belief structure onto a fictional group of people it just would never fit for. Or that someone doesn’t actually know the Lore very well. (Yes, I’m aware how long Epler has been with BioWare. DAV, interviews, and AMAs absolutely prove he doesn’t know the Lore. And doesn’t seem to care? I’ll never understand that. Nor does he understand the people of THEDAS. Or maybe even people in general? Writing well demands at least some understanding of how people work.)
I can't for a second believe that absolutely none of the elves, a people who have been enslaved, abused, tortured, and used for thousands of years, wouldn't willingly and very even possibly happily, follow beings who are, in fact, their Legendary Gods. Beings that in elven cultures are still venerated. Beings whose bad actions have been forgotten. It just doesn't make sense to say there wouldn't be.
“Still, though, why haven’t any Dalish elves decided to join forces with their gods? As Epler put it, the gods simply don’t care about them.”
No. You know what saying there’s no elves in the entourages of either Elgar’nan or Ghilan’nain really does? It doesn’t provide vindication. Nor even surcease, which might be a better word. All it does is infantalize and remove agency from an entire race of people. From all elves.
And that somehow means the elves don’t care about the gods? That’s, uh, not how that works?
Agency, in writing, means that characters make decisions and it affects the plot (good!) or that the plot pushes your characters around, (bad).
Agency is whether the character happens to the plot, (good!). Or if the plot happens to the character (bad).
It’s honestly the essence, in some ways, of ‘choices matter’.
There is a severe dearth of good agency in DAV. Sad as that makes me.
So let’s talk about faith amongst the elves, generally, and the Dalish, in particular. Because following a god requires faith.
Saying 'there's no elves in the group of 'lackeys and puppets' following Elgar’nan and Ghilan’nain is like saying that die-hard Catholics wouldn't follow a proven return of their savior, Jesus or even the father, god. Or insert any other cultures' living/dying gods return. Illogical, kinda offensive if you happen to be religious, and honestly? Foolish.
For many elves, their faith would be something they cling to. It would be hope in the darkness of abuse.
It’s kinda rude to say it’s a win for the elves to ignore their ancestral faith when it’s often, likely, the only thing they have left.
Honestly? It’s pretty offensive. THEDAS, elves, their rampaging elven gods, none of that is real. But there are plenty of abused minorities on Earth that they modelled the elves from. I didn’t grow up within the cultures, and I’m of Mohawk, Mikmaq, Irish Romani, mixed European, and (previously enslaved) African descent. Some things were passed down, regardless.
It's both my personal experience and proven in cultural anthropology that abused peoples will often cling to anything colonizers leave them that the people value. It’s the only way to maintain culture.
It’s why the residential schools took our hair first. Many native cultures don’t cut hair for numerous reasons. Then came the theft of language. My grandparents on both sides were kidnapped and taken to residential schools. The last one closed in 1996. I was a sophomore in university. This isn’t ancient history. And while, yes, Dragon Age is fake, people with similar experiences or backgrounds in the real world are hurt by crap we see in fiction every day. This is just a particularly egregious example of it.
History lives on in those still bleeding. No, if you’re of any abused minority, you’ll know what I’m talking about. We hang on to anything we can, because it’s all we have left.
So how and why would the Theodosian elves be any different? Because the gods don’t care? That’s some ridiculous authorium handwavium right there.
I could buy either Bellara or Davrin as being atheist or agnostic (more likely Bellara IMHO) but not both.
But as far as artistic depictions go? Regardless of anything anyone may say, they're shown as elves who are both pretty faithful. Here's why. They both wear Vallaslin.
It's pretty well laid out in the Lore (which we already know they ignored or retconned into insensibility in DAV and OMG in the interviews and recent AMA!) that the application of the Vallaslin (which translates to blood writing) is a sacred right of passage only offered to Dalish youths around the age of eighteen who will be staying with their people.
Regardless of the meaning of the Vallaslin in the past, they’re considered sacred by modern Theodosian elves.
They aren't just cool decorations. They're not make-up they can just wash off. They indicate which of the nine gods that particular elf has sworn themselves to in Dalish culture. (Technically eight, because Solas, The Dread Wolf, God of Rebellion and Trickery, never claimed or designed Vallaslin. Because he never owned slaves that is ever indicated anywhere.)
And only the Dalish use them. The specific design each Dalish elf wears is indicative of which elven god they both feel drawn to and wish to work to emmulate in their life. Making them even less likely to be worn casually.
The Lore is clear that application of the Vallaslin is ritual. It’s sacred. It would likely take multiple days to tattoo them into someone’s face. It would be excruciatingly painful. The face is one of the most painful places to get inked. I’ve got ink. It’s not comfortable even in ‘easy to tattoo’ places. On the face? Ouch!
Vallaslin would never have been given to Davrin. Davrin’s story shows some of his past, and in his heart, he always knew he wouldn’t be staying. His mentor Eldrin said something along the lines of ‘he knew/felt Davrin wouldn’t stay with the clan’. In the kind of social structure that’s been described for the Dalish, a youth’s mentor would absolutely be consulted on whether they were ready for Vallaslin. So why, for all the halla’s in THEDAS, would Davrin have Vallaslin? He wouldn’t. They’re marks of clan belonging, of pride, of faith in their gods and the Dalish way of life. Davrin just wouldn’t have them unless he deeply believed in serving Ghilan’nain. Which would mean being a Dalish wayfinder and halla keeper. Not a Grey Warden. 
While it’s cute given his backstory that Davrin wears the Mother of Halla’s marks. He just wouldn’t have them, no matter how sexy he looks with them.
If we handwave all that though… oh, the missed opportunity to have any Dalish wearing Vallaslin as a traitor to Rook’s cause, by wearing the blood writing of the God/Goddess they’re fighting? I was just waiting for the Vallaslin to actually mean something. For the gods to control, puppet-like, those wearing their blood writing? The missed angst, character development opportunities, and just… gah.
I don’t know if I’ll ever stop grieving what DAV could’ve been.
So if Bellara is more into science and questioning things, I could see her more as an atheist. So why does she wear Dirthaman’s Vallaslin? She’s not even technically Dalish that is ever truly shown in game. Dalish have a clan that is usually pretty important to them. Lore states there aren’t many, if any, Dalish who brave Arlathan because of slave-hunters. Where is Bellara’s clan? The veil-jumpers don’t count as a Dalish clan regardless of the window-dressing. They haven’t even been around that long according to some of Bellara’s lines. Okay, so if Bellara is actually Dalish from somewhere? I could see a scientist type having Dirthamen’s Vallaslin. But where in all the mysteries did she get them? Why would she have them? Given the why’s listed above, she just wouldn’t, no matter how beautiful she looks in them.
I mean, in a lot of ways, someone getting their Vallaslin would be sort of similar to anything sacred that is deemed ritual that dedicated a person to a faith/god-dess/religion.
So a quote from the Polygon article states, “instead of being accidentally (or purposely!) killed off by the player character, the Dalish elves in The Veilguard get to righteously rally against the mages that they once called gods and reclaim part of their history.”
Er… call me mistaken but wouldn’t that be sort of like destroying part of their history? Y’know, with destroying parts of Arlathan, banishing Anaris, and outright killing two of their venerated gods? Even if those gods weren’t as advertised? (A lot like this damned game tbh.)
Epler. “I love that the Dalish in this game, by and large, are saying, No, we were lied to. We were the first victims of these gods. We’re going to fight back,” Epler said. “And they really get a sense to kind of rise up in this game and start establishing themselves in this way that in the future I can’t wait to go back to, but in this game gives them a sense of a win. They get a victory in how they respond to the threat of the gods in this game.”
Future? What future? Given the events in DAV, there isn’t even a statistically relevant breeding population (in the scientific sense) of elves left!
In the Lore, the blight is a death sentence, one way or another. Between the Venatori’s favourite blood bags being enslaved elves, the gods using them as sacrifices, and the entirety of southern THEDAS being overwhelmed with blight, just how many elves does Epler think might possibly be left?
This is what I mean about DAV having bad planning, lack of Lore adhesion, poor attention to detail, and just crappy writing. Nothing. Makes. Sense.
Completely pushing aside pretty much everything I’ve just talked about… can someone please explain how most of the elves on the entire continent of THEDAS dying from the blight… y’know, the Dalish, named after the Dales, in southern THEDAS, which were quite clearly overrun by blight and not-fucking-darkspawn in the codices… y’know, the Dalish, on the wide open Dales, in land ships/Aravel, and with herds of Halla, children, and elders to care for… how is all of them being dead or blighted a win? The only potential ‘win’ for any of them is for Bellara/Davrin, who aren’t even technically Dalish by the ways of the Dalish in the Lore. And depending on player choice, its possibly a win only for one of them?
Bellara, in speaking about the gods, sounds like the worst sort of uneducated twit. And she's supposed to be smart? The thing with smart characters? You have to actually show them being smart.
I just can’t see how one or two ‘Dalish’ being kinda creepily uncaring of their venerated gods coming back to reality and being on the team to kill them… is in any way ‘a win’.
The racism in DAV is woven all throughout. And it seems it's baked right into the core of BioWare.
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exhaslo · 1 year ago
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Corruption
(Villain!Miguel x F!Hero!Reader)
Warning: Minors DNI, smut, mentions of sex, violence, blood, murder, twisted thoughts, experimentation, language, wannabe fluff, established friendship?
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Five months before D-Day
It was quiet. Something nearly unheard of in the city of Nueva York. Not even a whoosh of wind or a click of a heel could bring noise to this silent room. Especially not after the vulture of the lab had demanded everyone's silence.
You sat in the corner of the lab, quietly tapping against your tablet. You could not even hear another's breathing. That is how powerful the lead of this lab was when he demanded silence. That was how powerful-
"Miguel?" You whispered lowly.
Miguel O'Hara, otherwise known as Mike, due to his father's pestering nicknaming. Miguel O'Hara was the son of Alchemax's CEO, Tyler Stone, and the smartest scientist in the corporation. He was a man of power, and a man to be feared.
"This better be good, (Y/N)" He said with a hiss.
Oh, how you loved it when your name rolled off his tongue. If only he would have said it a little nicer. You raised your head from your tablet, looking ahead at the scene before you. A man, strapped onto a metal table with lights and strange liquid being entered into his blood. A twisted science experiment that never ended well.
Sometimes you questioned your job. You questioned how you found yourself seated as a secretary, recording each horrible experiment Miguel did. This was not for the faint of heart. You started working for Alchemax about two years ago thanks to a friend who helped you out of college.
You met Miguel a year ago, when you were assigned to be his personal assistant. Since, apparently, everyone else refused to take the job. Once you did your first report with him, you immediately found out why, but that wasn't going to stop you.
"According to my report, the subject purposely ate a peach before agreeing to this test." You explained.
"So?"
"So, the patient is allergic to peaches and is about to go into shock in a matter of minutes now." You huffed.
"Shouldn't affect the procedure."
Oh, how sometimes you wished you could enter Miguel's head and wonder what sick and twisted mind worked in there. Miguel was fascinated with genetic splicing. He always had a new test subject on his table once a week. He wanted to learn how to manipulate their DNA.
However, each experiment always ended in failure and death. The body count Miguel had was enough to lock him up a hundred times over. The man had not a single shred of humanity in him. It was always about the experiment.
"Begin,"
You rolled your eyes, wishing you could stop all of this. You had begged for a way to find the light in Miguel. How could someone so handsome be so evil? It almost made you sick the amount of times you had wet dreams about your monster of a boss.
"Another failure, sir. Perhaps we made a mistake-"
"I never make mistakes." Miguel hissed as he watched his now deformed monster patient lie dead on his table, "Get him out of my sight! Now!"
Right as you started to fill out your report, you noticed the patient's stomach start to inflate. You furrowed your brows before yelling out to everyone that the body was going to pop.
Your efforts were for not. Within the second, everyone in the room was covering in disgusting blood and body parts. You had wanted to throw up, but you did your best to hold it all in. Miguel was already throwing a fit about his lab being dirty, you didn't want to add to the mess.
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Once you were all cleaned, you made your way back to your office. You still had to finish your reports and send them over to Miguel for review. Miguel always demanded perfection. It was amazing how long you even lasted as his assistant. According to everyone, you were the more insane one.
"Oh, Miguel," You muttered, spotting the tall man in your office. Miguel lazily looked at you,
"Took you long enough," He spat. You placed your tablet down,
"Remember that time I told you that being a female requires more shower time?" You said with a smirk. Miguel scoffed as he placed himself onto your work couch, "Not even a smile," You huffed.
"Get working,"
"Yes, yes, oh chosen one." You teased once more.
The only thing that you could collectively agree on was that you were in love with the mad scientist. Giving Miguel a head massage, you stared down at his gorgeous face. You had been working with Miguel for a year. You knew what he liked, what he didn't like and how he worked.
It was safe to say that you were probably the only person in this whole building who understood Miguel. If only he wasn't evil. You would totally asked him out on a date long ago. Each passing day, you hoped that these feelings would go away.
"(Y/N), do my shoulders too," Miguel whispered in a low and sweet voice.
You folded far too easily. Doing what he asked, you knew that Miguel was using you. You had to be blind not to see that, but shit, you couldn't help it. That, and you physically could not quit your job. Both Miguel and his father made sure that no one would quit.
If you'd try, you'd be drugged.
Perhaps one day, you could bring this place to justice. You wanted Miguel to see the error of his ways. If there was any way to change Miguel to see the light, you would. Of course, taking Alchemax down was going to have to be the first step.
But, that was just a fleeting dream.
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Miguel inhaled deeply as you worked on his tense muscles. The only thoughts coursing through his mind were his experiments. How they could have been done differently. Perhaps he needed a different breed of test subjects.
"Let's resume our experiments with spiders," Miguel said with a low groan as you pinched just the right spot. He heard your small whine and scoffed, "We do this every other month."
"I know and you still torture me with it!" You cried softly, moving his to hair. Miguel closed his eyes, enjoying the massage,
"And as usual, I let you pick the next creature to study."
"A seahorse?"
Miguel resisted a chuckle since his first thought was getting males pregnant. How amusing that experiment would be, yet also horrifying. If he were to do that, then he would truly live up to his name as a mad scientist.
You had some dumb and ridiculous ideas. You weren't as smart as the rest of them and Miguel liked that. You were good for him to have around. Someone to remind him that there were those who were just dumb naturally. Of course, he could never say that to your face, or you would start crying.
"Like last time," He whispered ever so softly.
"Hm? Are you thinking rude things again?" You asked with a huff, gently pulling against his hair, "I can always stop this."
"But you won't." Miguel hummed and lazily opened his eyes, "Just be ready for tomorrow. I don't want another disappointment."
Getting himself ready to leave, Miguel fixed up his lab coat before giving you one last glance. He knew that you were attractive. Hell, he had to force his ignorant coworkers to get back to work since all they did was talk about wanting to date you.
Perhaps in another universe, where Miguel wasn't obsessed with his experiments, he would date you. Stepping out of your office, Miguel knew full well what he was doing. He got a rise knowing that he was keeping you all to himself.
Call it villainous, but Miguel enjoyed being selfish. That's how he always got what he wanted. Entering his private office, Miguel's eyes sparkled as he saw a case full of spiders.
"I'll make the perfect specimen, this I swear." He said with a wicked smirk.
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You squirmed in place, not ready to deal with today's experiment. You hated spiders. You wanted nothing to do with them, but Miguel loved them. He was so fascinated about the great hero age and about Spiderman.
Slowly making your way inside the lab, you gasped as scientists dashed past you. Everyone was running around in a panicked frenzy. Wondering what was happening, you gasped as you saw Miguel shaking with anger.
His spider enclosure was knocked over.
You wanted to jump and scream, but you knew that would only anger Miguel more. Hesitantly, you approached Miguel to try and distract him. As you did so, you felt something bite the back of your neck. You flinched and slapped your neck, praying that it was a mosquito.
You bit your lower lip, spotting a spider and nearly cried. Quickly shaking the foul creature away, you hurried to Miguel's side and gently tugged on his sleeve. Miguel hissed as he turned towards you violently,
"WHY AREN'T Y-Oh, (Y/N)," He growled. You were still biting your lower lip, glancing away from him,
"I know now isn't the best time, but why don't we-"
"Whatever it is, let's go while these fucking IDIOTS find my spiders," Miguel roared in anger.
You just nodded, leading Miguel out of the room as you quietly prayed for your fellow coworkers. Miguel was not going to let them rest until all of his spiders were found...including the one you just murdered.
"Why don't you tell me what you were going to work on while we go to lunch? I think a meal break would help," You suggested, tapping away on your tablet. Miguel stroked his hand through his hair, cussing lowly in Spanish,
"Sounds like a plan."
You smiled as you led Miguel to your lunch destination. You were proud to say that whenever Miguel was going to have a meltdown, you were able to calm him down someway or another. Call it talent, but you loved being reliable.
However, that talent seemed to be failing you now. You couldn't keep focus during lunch and Miguel seemed to be getting annoyed. You weren't sure what was happening to you, but your body felt like it was on fire. Could it have been from the spider bite?
"Sorry, Miguel...I just...need to..." You whispered before collapsing.
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Miguel was growing irritated as he watched you waver in place. You were fine just a moment ago. If there was one thing Miguel hated, it was when someone lost interest in his conversation. This had never happened to you, so why now?
Right as you stood, you immediately came tumbling down. Like instinct, Miguel caught you and noticed that you had a fever. A small scoff escaped his lips as he carried you out of the restaurant and back into his company car.
"Take us to (Y/N)'s apartment. Fool got herself sick,"
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Next Chapter
@tojishugetiddies @miguelsfavwife @foulsharkheart @club-danger-zone @ivkygirly @jollystrawberrycycle @amber-content
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thewertsearch · 11 months ago
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We should hurry this along. My visitor is beginning to set things on fire. […] TT: Who? Some guy. I was joking anyway. I am not in a hurry at all.
You said you should hurry, which is different from saying that you're in a hurry.
If the Alpha Timeline decrees that this conversation will be rushed, then it's still accurate to say it 'should' be hurried, even if Scratch isn't personally pushed for time.
TT: I thought you didn't lie. TT: Aren't jokes essentially humorous lies? Jokes are only temporary lies. If the falsehood is never exposed, there is no punchline. If the punchline is never delivered, the lie is sealed forever, regardless of initial humorous intent.
And this is just bullshit.
First of all, admitting that you lied doesn't retroactively negate the lie. That's not how any of this works. Scratch is just unilaterally deciding that falsehoods only 'count' when they're permanent, a rule he pulled completely out of his foamy ass.
Even if we accept his premise - which I don't - he could still wait arbitrarily long before revealing his falsehood, so that Rose doesn't realize she's been played until it's too late. This definition doesn't meaningfully restrict him from lying, and I think it's purely designed to confuse Rose.
[…] Lies are not funny. TT: I think if you're going to risk tarnishing your record of honesty, you should probably get better material. My joke was objectively funny. Who would know better than I?
And these? These are opinions, which don't have objective truth values. There are so many strings attached to Scratch’s ‘I don't lie’ shtick, I could knit him a better outfit.
Not that it matters, because Rose is in too deep. She's not going to back out now, no matter how suspicious this guy is.
TT: So you're saying an inaccurate statement doesn't count as a lie, as long as you say "just kidding" later? Basically. TT: What if it's much later? Is it still "just a joke?" No, that would be something closer to a prank.
I appreciate that Rose is trying, but her language is still too imprecise. Scratch is immortal, and it's impossible to know what ‘much later’ means to him. For god's sake, he's having this conversation in a single extended second! Give us some hard numbers, fucker!
TT: Are you allowed to lie about playing pranks? If I asked you if you were playing a prank on me, would you tell the truth? I am allowed to do whatever I want. I choose never to lie. I also choose to tell jokes now and then, and to play pranks quite sparingly.
See, the trap Rose is falling into is that she’s buying into the premise of the game. She's delving deep into the intricacies of Scratch's rules, and in the process, has completely forgotten to be skeptical of the guy who's explaining them.
Scratch tailors his manipulation style to whoever he's talking to - and if anyone's susceptible to a nerd-snipe, it's the Seer of Light.
But I can say that I have never played a prank on you, and no statement I have made to you thus far, or will make in this conversation, will contain any trace of falsehood for the sake of setting up a joke or a prank, with the exception of the joke I just made, and another one I will make very soon.
Like – let’s take this statement as an example. We could review the entire conversation with it in mind, and try to puzzle out where the setup for Scratch’s second ‘joke’ is, if it exists at all. Rose is probably doing exactly that – and in the process, has completely forgotten that he just said that he’s fully capable of lying.
He’s literally telling her to her face that he’s deceiving her, but she's too caught up in his games to pay attention. This is what it means to play with your cards face up, and it’s as impressive as it is terrifying.
TT: I'm starting to change my mind. Oh? TT: Yes. I think your joke was funny in retrospect. Actually, your whole shtick is pretty good. I'm warming up to it.
It’s great! He’s a good villain! He’s a puppet who’s got everyone else tied up in strings!
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tightjeansjavi · 7 months ago
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I’m back from seeing gladiator 2 and honestly, I’m gonna be so real with y’all rn…I expected way more 😔 like was it entertaining, yes? Would I pay to see it again? No.
don’t read further if you don’t want spoilers
Okay, so here is my honest review that no one asked for
The intro and opening credits were absolutely STUNNING & the soundtrack of course
Costumes? Absolutely SLAYED.
Acacius…listen, I love Pedro, he’s a fantastic actor and he bodies every single role, but justice for Acacius bc he should have had WAY more scenes. Like yes, we get the vibe that he is not like the emperors and has a different outlook for Rome and he doesn’t want to continue to serve tyranny, but we barely got to soak in his character before he was [redacted]
And yes, you get the vibe that he is dedicated to Lucilla at all costs, but every interview and article about them and their relationship was not portrayed in the film. Sorry
Geta and Caracalla: I’m obsessed with these two ginger-haired twinks and everytime they left a scene, I was disappointed because I wanted more. There were moments where you could tell that there was some deep sibling rivalry, and while yes they were tyrants and villains, I ended up feeling sorry for them in the end 😭
Joseph Quinn and Fred Hechinger carried sorry not sorry and I would watch an entire movie about Geta and Caracalla. I would be SAT
(Hot take. But Geta’s severed head was laughable. What the fuck was that?? You have a huge ass budget for a movie of this scale and you can’t even get a realistic prosthetic head?)
HOT HOT take, but Macrinus was just okay. He was entertaining to watch but I also just like couldn’t really get into his character but it felt like he was the only one who actually had a motive and a real plan so that was cool
Lucius…this was another like I was expecting more but he was alright? Like there were moments where I was like feeling the energy but then it just fell flat
I think each character deserves justice and a better script. There! I said it!
And please remember these are just my opinions and not to take them seriously
*the sharks in the navel battle made me want to walk out that was so stupid
* the trailers and spoiler content we got had me so hyped for this movie and then it just…died
* Justice for May Calamawy
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tryandbehappy · 17 days ago
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Oh my god. What utter bullshit.
Do you realize what they did? They made Nick the fucking scapegoat with no closure, no resolution, no development, nothing. And the worst part? It’s all completely OOC.
Why?
Because if they wanted to show that he was some kind of villain June became disillusioned with, then they should’ve actually shown him being shady and doing something really unforgivable and irredeemable at least. They should’ve given him a real “dark side,” a secret life, something ( i honestly can’t even imagine what it could’ve been —considering she forgave Lydia and Serena for things that were so much worse. But okay. At minimum, he would’ve had to personally shoot those girls and assault someone right in front of her for this level of rejection to make any f***ing sense)
But they didn’t.
All we ever saw were things that made us feel sympathy for him, compassion for him.
And then what happens?
June throws him away like a fing dog. Even when literally everyone else is defending him (even Luke and Serena) She’s like “nah, f that, it was his choice, he deserved it” 😱
Completely erasing everything they shared. EVERYTHING. Don’t get me started to list everything he did for her.
I genuinely don’t even have words for how f*ing absurd that is. So what are we left with?
A message that her love for him was… what? Fake?Unacknowledged? That he was never really good? That it meant nothing?
Because apparently, “all commanders are evil.”
Except wait — not all of them. Lawrence is fine. Rapists are evil — but not Lydia, not Serena. THEY get redemption. THEY get forgiveness. Even from June herself.
The hypocrisy is off the charts.
Nick gets destroyed for one single mistake. (And it wasn’t even really a mistake)
She knows his circumstances. She knows he has no one outside. She left him. She knows he has a wife and a child now. She knows all of that.
So if the goal was to make him look like a monster then WHY give him a wife and child he actually cares about?Why show that he values loyalty, family, love? Why frame him as the one man who stayed decent in a hellish system only to punish him for it?
You can’t have it both ways. You can’t build a character whose entire arc is about being emotionally grounded, loyal, protective and then expect us to believe he’s evil because he didn’t abandon his child?
In his final scene, you have ROSE pressuring him to protect his child and that was his motive. And now we’re supposed to go, “oh yeah, that’s a bad guy”?
WHAT???
It just…It doesn’t make any f***ing sense. And let’s be real — this episode told me nothing I didn’t already suspect. They planted those dumbass lines earlier:
“the winning side,”
“June asked me to leave Gilead.” It was already clear they were setting him up for a fall.
So what’s the takeaway?
The entire show used us — used the fanbase’s love and trust and compassion for Nick —
just to keep us watching. Just to keep us emotionally invested. So that in the end, they could drop this cheap lazy f***ing twist where he’s suddenly “the villain” not because it makes sense, but because they wanted shock value.
And in doing that, they made the main character June look like a coward. A hypocrite. A bitter woman who never actually grew, never evolved. An ungrateful disgusting woman.
She judges based on labels (only Nick btw), even though she, of all people, should understand the gray areas —better than anyone. Her mother doesn’t. Luke doesn’t. But she lived it. She knows.
And still, in the end, she chooses the white coat (strange she wasn’t wearing it like when she was watching the fucking ballet)
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She turns her back on Nick.Betrays their entire story. Over one thing. ONE decision — a situation she herself put him in. A father of her child. Made out of love! (She said it herself)
It’s disgusting.
And the message it sends? Absolutely revolting. I don’t even know how to comment on this anymore.
F*** them. They deserve a f***ing avalanche of 1-star reviews, internet rage, and public backlash.
Because this, this is how you butcher a legacy.
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scary-grace · 10 months ago
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Opposites Attract (Chapter 2) - a Shigaraki x f!Reader fic
Your quirk lets you capture almost anyone with ease, and you can't believe you let Shigaraki Tomura escape. Shigaraki can't believe it, either, and according to the League, there's only one possible explanation -- you let him go because you've fallen in love with him. He decides to find out if it's true. You decide you won't fail to capture him again. You both get a lot more than you bargained for. (cross-posted to Ao3)
Chapters: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
Chapter 2
It’s been two weeks since the League of Villains vs Kamino Ward: Round 2, and there hasn’t been a single day that somebody hasn’t read you the riot act. It wasn’t enough that Miruko did it on-scene, well within microphone range of every single news crew who swarmed the park – every senior hero in Yokohama got in on it, too. And as if it wasn’t already your worst week ever, the HPSC called you in for a formal review of your pro hero license. You didn’t sleep at all the night before, and when you got to the hearing half an hour early with sweat stains already oozing through your one nice blouse, you found out that they’d done the review already, and the hearing was just to present the findings. One of the members of the committee mentioned that you looked a little pale. In hindsight, you’re amazed you didn’t have a heart attack.
You found out that the review of your license was a PR thing more than anything else – although your choices weren’t popular or flashy, nothing about how you handled the incident fell outside the hero code. Not that it matters to the general public. If you had an agency, they’d be booking you on podcasts and talk shows so you could explain yourself, but you’re underground, so you’re stuck listening to TV presenters who’ve never met a villain and podcasters who’d piss themselves if they came face to face with even the pettiest of criminals, all talking about how badly you blew it. There was even a petition circling demanding that you make a public apology for what happened to the All Might statue – one apology to the sculptor who made the statue, and one to All Might himself. When that one started making the rounds, you set your social media accounts to private and hid from your phone for the next three days.
Things are starting to die down, you think, but you’ve still got one stop left on your humiliation tour, and it’s the one you’re dreading the most. Your alma mater is always looking for learning experiences to offer their students, so you’re spending this afternoon at UA, listening while the first-year hero students pick apart every action you took in Kamino Park.
It’s an open forum, so everyone who wants to run their mouth gets a chance to do it, and you sit stonefaced in your chair, praying for your composure to hold. Eraserhead said he’d give you chances to respond, and he does, every time a student sits down. But you don’t want to get into a back-and-forth with a bunch of kids. You did what you did. You can’t go back. Maybe they can learn from what you did wrong.
What did you do wrong, actually? The HPSC cleared you. You’re so unpopular right now that they’d seize any chance they got to strip your licenses, but they cleared you – and you’re still here, listening to a bunch of teenagers take shots at you. The unfairness boils up inside you all at once, and when the next kid sits down, you stand up before Eraser invites you to.
“You all think you could have done better than me out there,” you start. “Maybe you’re right. There are always things that could be done better. What did I do wrong?”
It’s quiet for a second. “Are you stupid or something?” Bakugou asks you. “They got away! That’s what you did wrong!”
“Is it? Kurogiri and Shigaraki got away at USJ, and again at Kamino the first time. I don’t see you lighting All Might’s ass up,” you shoot back. Bakugou makes an affronted sound. “Answer me for real this time. What was my actual, quantifiable mistake?”
It’s quiet for another beat. Eraser opens his mouth, but Class B’s teacher speaks up first. “That’s the more interesting question,” he says. “We’ve talked about how Skynet could have done better. What actual mistake did Skynet make that led to the final outcome of the incident?”
You know what it was, deep in your heart, and you also know that the only person who could call you on it is somebody you hope you never see again. A hand creeps up, and Vlad calls on the student – one of Eraser’s. “Yes, Midoriya?”
“I don’t know if I would call it a mistake,” Midoriya says, “but I was wondering – why didn’t you use more of your quirk?”
That’s a new one. You wait quietly, and Midoriya elaborates. “I mean, Magnetism has dozens of applications. You’re sort of known for being creative with how you use it. And r/herojapan did a power ranking of every active hero and you ranked the highest out of all non-charted heroes.”
That’s news to you. “So I guess that’s what I want to know,” Midoriya concludes. “If you have a quirk with a lot of applications and a lot of power to work with, how could the League of Villains escape?”
“Uh –” You glance at Vlad King, then at Eraserhead. They both gesture for you to go on. “What you said about my quirk – you’re right. I can go big with it. But the bigger I go with it, the less control I have, and I’m not creating magnetic fields out of thin air. I’m enhancing and altering what already exists. Every magnetic field I alter is touching another one, and my alterations affect those fields, too. If I want to use my quirk safely on a large scale, I have to alter some magnetic fields while stabilizing others simultaneously, and I have to do that while protecting civilians and assisting my fellow heroes and trying not to get killed. Using my quirk on the scale I would have needed at Kamino just isn’t possible.”
You can tell Midoriya doesn’t get it. Nobody else does, either. “Maybe you should demonstrate,” the girl from Class B who can make her hands enormous says. “Show us what would have happened if you used your quirk the way Midoriya is talking about at Kamino.”
“I think that’s a good idea,” Vlad says. “Ground Beta should be open right now. Let’s go.”
Vlad was your homeroom teacher in your first year at UA. You’ve been struggling not to call him sensei since you set foot on campus, and you know he knows how much you’ve struggled with your quirk. You also knew he was going to support you, but you’re not sure you like how he’s doing it – proving that you’re right, sure, but proving it by proving that you can’t handle your quirk at even partial strength, when the way you were using your quirk wasn’t even the real problem. If you had reacted faster, gotten a solid grip on Shigaraki through other means instead of getting distracted by how not-okay he is, you’d have held all the cards by the time the warp villain came to play. You’d like to see the warp villain try to back you into a corner when you’ve got a piece of rebar wrapped around Shigaraki’s throat.
But you didn’t have your shit together, because you were too stuck on just how shocked Shigaraki looked when you asked if he was okay. Not fake-shocked, not mocking-shocked, not look-at-the-hypocritical-hero-pretending-to-care shocked – truly, honestly shocked, like you’re the first person who’s asked him that question in a while. You flatly refuse to entertain the thought that you’re the first person who’s ever asked him that, because that would be too goddamn sad and you’re not into woobifying villains. You know more than a few heroes who have those romance novels about getting captured and ravished by a not-bad-just-misunderstood villain hanging out on their e-readers, and that’s not your style at all. So why did it bother you, seeing that look on Shigaraki’s face? Why are you still thinking about it two weeks later?
You shake it off as you, Eraser, Vlad, and the students reach Ground Beta. If you don’t want anybody to guess how you actually messed up, you need to do a good job proving that their idea of your mistake is the right one.
Vlad sets up a target a quarter of a mile down Ground Beta’s main street – the distance from one end of Kamino Park to the other – then makes his way back to you and the others. Eraserhead ushers everybody away from you. “Okay,” you say, projecting your voice, “I’m going to show you what it would have looked like for me to use my quirk to drag the League of Villains to me from across Kamino Park.”
Part of you is tempted to just blow it. Use your quirk recklessly, without worrying about consequences or property damage or anything but how it feels to finally let loose. But you’re a hero. You need to set a good example, not give the students even more reasons to question why you still have your license, and even here, there’s a chance that using your quirk at full strength isn’t safe. You get set, feeling the stabilizers in your boots anchor you to the ground. You tap into your metal sense, identifying the target a quarter mile away. Then you extend your hand, activate your quirk as precisely as you can manage, and pull.
The practice target starts moving. Unfortunately, so does everything else. No matter how hard you try to keep your focus on the target and only the target, metal fragments in the concrete lurch upwards, responding to your shift in the magnetic fields, pulling the street apart. The buildings on either side crumple inwards as their steel frameworks tear free. Lightposts bend into impossible shapes. Manhole covers lift from the street and fly towards you, forcing you to employ your other hand to stop them from striking the students behind you. The air vibrates. And sure, the practice target is flying towards you at high speed – but the destruction you’re wreaking on everything in between you and it is worse than what anyone but Shigaraki could have done to Kamino Memorial Park.
You let your grip on the magnetic fields fall when the target’s within thirty feet or so, and let momentum do the rest. Then you turn back towards the students. “This looks bad, right? If I’d done this at Kamino, it would be even worse. Anybody want to guess why?”
“Water mains,” the girl from 1-A with the Creation quirk says at once. You nod. “Cities are full of underground infrastructure, and most of that is made of metal. If your quirk is hard to focus narrowly at a distance from the target, you could do billions of yen worth of property damage.”
“What about people?” the electricity kid from 1-A says – the electricity kid who, if you remember right, also has a wide-range quirk. “Do they get caught when you do that?”
“No,” you say. “I have to be at close range to manipulate the iron in someone’s body. And they have to have enough iron in their bloodstream to make it possible.”
You say that, cringe, and brace yourself for what must be coming – one of the students, probably Midoriya, realizing that Shigaraki’s weapons-grade anemia is what kept him out of your reach at first. Followed by one of the students, probably Midoriya, asking why you didn’t use any of the other means at your disposal to capture him. “Oh,” the electricity kid says instead. “I get it now.”
“I have a question, Skynet,” Bakugou says loudly. “Couldn’t you do all that without destroying everything if you trained your quirk harder?”
You asked yourself that question a lot when you were a student at UA. The theoretical answer was always yes. “No,” you say, without getting into all the reasons why. “Does anyone else have a question?”
A Class B student named Honenuki has a question about what types of property you should avoid damaging if possible, and a Class B student named Monoma wants to know whether you were in Class A or Class B when you were at UA. He looks pretty happy when you say Class B, which is weird. You’re persona non grata among heroes right now. It doesn’t make a ton of sense that he’s excited that you were in the same class as he is. Vlad doesn’t ask you how things have been going; he just pats your shoulder and walks off. You try to escape before Eraserhead can talk to you, and make it exactly five steps before he calls out. “Skynet.”
You grit your teeth. “Do you want me to apologize, too?”
“For what?” Eraser looks irritated. “I asked you to look after my students. You looked after them. I’d be asking you to apologize if you’d let them fight.”
“Oh.” You weren’t looking forward to making that apology. “Then, um – what did you want to talk to me about?”
“My students are used to having their quirks temporarily canceled, but my quirk is unique. They’re much more likely to run into villains whose powers serve to restrain them,” Eraser says. You get where he’s going with this and try to interrupt, but he talks right over you. “I want you to come back for at least one of our basic training sessions. It’s rational to give them a chance to practice against a power set like yours, and it’ll also allow you the chance to work on fine-tuning your quirk.”
You knew there was a backhand somewhere in there. “My quirk’s as fine-tuned as it’s going to get.”
“We’ll see,” Eraser says. “The next basic training where all my students will be present is next Thursday. Come in.”
You recall making a promise to yourself, one which included telling Eraser to go to hell if he asked any more favors. But you still need to rehab your image. A lot. “Yeah. Sounds good.”
You change out of your costume before you leave campus – everything except your boots, which you wear almost all the time – and while you’re waiting for the train, you get a text from the group chat you have with the three other female pros who debuted in the same year as you. That’s about the only thing the four of you have in common, but that’s not stopping Yue from messaging in all caps. I MISSED MY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY! WE NEED TO CELEBRATE <3 <3 <3
Yue was the last one of the four of you to debut. Her agency held her back for maximum press impact, whereas you just picked a day at random to quit working as a sidekick and strike out for yourself. Kagura, another member of the debut class, texts back before you can. Spa night?
That sounds good to you, but it’s not Yue’s speed at all. GOING OUT! I CAN GET US INTO CLUB 100 IN TOKYO!
Right – Yue’s number 25, as of the most recent billboard chart update. Mayuko, the member of the class you get along with best, texts next. It might be nice to see what it’s like?
Kagura gives a thumbs-up, and Yue sets the celebration date for tonight – and orders you all to come to her apartment to get ready. She has a special message for you. NO BOOTS, SKY. THEY’RE TOO CLUNKY FOR DANCING.
You send back a frowny face, and Mayuko chimes in. You can borrow my shoes. It’s been so long since we got together! I can’t wait!
That’s true, and you’ve missed them – but right now you’re a liability. Are you sure you want to be seen in public with me? I’m sort of radioactive right now.
Nobody will recognize you out of costume, Yue says, instead of what you were hoping she’d say, which is that it doesn’t matter and she has your back. Be at my place at 6!
There goes your quiet night. You board your train and lean back in your seat. If you have to go dancing tonight, you’d better catch some rest now.
Shigaraki refreshes the page, frowning. Then he refreshes it again, getting the same message. What the hell does ‘set to private’ mean? He googles it, learns that only approved followers can see an Instagram account that’s set to private, and feels a surge of annoyance. It figures. He spent two weeks debating whether or not to look you up, and by the time he’s finally decided it’s not creepy to look up the weird hero who has a crush on him, you locked all of your stupid social media accounts.
Part of Shigaraki still thinks everybody’s messing with him – everybody except Toga, who’s delusional, and Twice, who’s probably never touched a girl who wasn’t in the process of arresting him. But something about it keeps bothering Shigaraki. Something about you keeps bothering him. Thinking about it makes him itch, and not thinking about it isn’t working. After two weeks of trying both, Shigaraki decided to look you up and find out what you’ve said about him and the League of Villains, so he can finally delete the mental save file with you in it.
But you haven’t said much about the League of Villains. Shigaraki can’t tell if that’s because no one’s asked you or because you don’t have anything to say – or at least not anything you’d say publicly, which is why he went looking for your personal social media accounts and found them all locked. Shigaraki scratches with one hand and looks you up on Reddit with the other. He has to be pretty specific in his search query. Just looking up “Skynet” brings up a lot of stuff about movies.
The Reddit threads about you are a mix of obsessive hero fans and people who think you’re hot. The latter group spends a lot of time bitching about the fact that you don’t post enough thirst traps. It doesn’t seem like you go for fanservice. Good. Shigaraki hates heroes on principle, but he hates the ones who don’t showboat ever so slightly less.
You used to work with Eraserhead, which is probably why he let you supervise his class. You went to UA. There are links to all your Sports Festival performances, and Shigaraki bookmarks them for later, in case you’ve got skills you didn’t show in the fight at Kamino. You’re not very well-known, and none of your arrests have been of big-time villains. And as far as Shigaraki can find, you’ve never said a word about the League.
It’s not like Shigaraki was expecting to find a whole essay about why you don’t hate the League and why you have a crush on him. He wouldn’t have liked that. But he also doesn’t like the fact that you apparently didn’t think about the League at all before you fought him at Kamino. Maybe you did and you were just keeping quiet about it. Or maybe you didn’t care at all until you met Shigaraki in person, and then you – what? Worried about him? Cared about him? Wanted him to live? Do people actually fall in love at first sight?
Toga would say yes, but Toga’s seventeen, and also insane. Shigaraki can’t take anything Toga says at face value.
There’s one other spot on Reddit where Shigaraki finds you – in a thread on the weirdest hero names. He remembers the movies that kept popping up in his earlier search results and finds one of them on his favorite pirating site. He’s bored. There’s nothing to do right now. He’s decided not to do anything else until the dust has settled. He has time for a movie.
The hideout is quiet right now. Dabi’s been gone all day. Toga and Twice left this afternoon, either to scout things out or to steal more supplies, and Spinner, Compress, and Magne are all napping in the next room. This afternoon, Shigaraki sent Kurogiri to ask the doctor for help. He didn’t want to do that, but with Sensei gone – gone, and it’s Shigaraki’s fault, because it was his stupid plan – the League is out of Nomus and running out of money. They need backup, and Kurogiri’s better at convincing the doctor to do things than Shigaraki is. A scarecrow with a paper bag over its head is better at convincing people to do things than Shigaraki is. If Shigaraki was convincing at all, he would have won Bakugou over, and none of this would have happened.
The movie is sci-fi, or maybe horror. It’s also really old, from some time period where all the movies were set in a world where quirks don’t exist. If quirks existed, this movie would be over before it even started. Probably. Shigaraki wonders if you’ve seen this movie. If you liked it. What other things do you like, in addition to him?
A few minutes later, he gets an answer to at least one of his questions. You’ve definitely seen this movie, and you must have liked it, or you wouldn’t have named yourself after the evil supercomputer that nuked humanity and started building killer robots to take out anybody who survived. Now Shigaraki gets why you were on the list of heroes with weird names, and he’s pretty sure you should be at the top of it. You must have at least a couple screws loose. That’s probably why you took one look at Shigaraki and decided to fall in love with him. If you have fallen in love with him. Have you?
Shigaraki needs to stop thinking about this. He presses play on the movie again. Now that he’s got at least an answer or two, maybe he can focus on something else. Something other than the fact that he’s tired and hungry and has a headache and will probably get dizzy if he stands up too fast, just like he always has. And the fact that none of those things were a problem until you asked if he was okay.
He must fall asleep or something, because the next thing he knows, the screen of his phone’s gone dark, and someone is hollering at him from the other room. “What?” Shigaraki shouts back.
“Get in here,” Dabi says. Dabi’s back. “Your girlfriend’s on the news.”
“All over the news,” Toga adds gleefully, before Shigaraki can argue back that a) you’re not his girlfriend because b) he doesn’t even like you. “She’s even cuter when she’s covered in blood!”
What? Shigaraki stands up too fast, comes close to blacking out, and scrambles unsteadily into the other room. Magne has the TV on, and Shigaraki elbows his way past Compress and Dabi for a look at the screen. It’s the national news, a special report. Something about speed brakes failing on a Shinkansen headed through Tokyo and a catastrophic derailment. Or what would have been a catastrophic derailment, if it wasn’t for you. Before Shigaraki can tell somebody to look up what happened on their phone – his is dead – the news broadcast plays a video of the incident. All Shigaraki and the others can do is stare.
“Damn,” Spinner says into the silence that falls afterwards. “If she’d done that at Kamino, you all would have been toast.”
No kidding. Shigaraki didn’t go to school past kindergarten, but every idiot knows that trains are heavy, and knows that the faster something is going, the harder it is to stop. In the video, you’re on the tracks behind the speeding train, hand outstretched. Shigaraki sees the train shudder when your quirk catches it. It yanks you off your feet about three seconds later, and you get dragged out of the frame facedown, one hand still extended, still hanging on. Whoever’s holding the camera pans left, following the train, and it’s pretty obvious that the train is slowing down. Shigaraki thought your quirk was good for paralyzing people and pulling wires out of the ground. He’d never have guessed you were capable of this.
“Why didn’t she do that at Kamino?” Dabi asks, baffled. “She could have made it big as the hero who took down the League of Villains instead of getting dragged by the press for letting us go.”
“Which do you think dragged her harder, the press or the train?” Magne cackles, and Dabi snorts. “She looks like roadkill –”
“Don’t be dumb,” Toga says to Magne. “She’s got blood all over her. It’s cute! And she let us go at Kamino because she loves Tomura-kun.”
“Oh, right.” Magne nods. Dabi’s still snickering. “The train isn’t half as cute as the boss is!”
Dabi’s snickering gets worse, and Twice is guffawing in the background. Shigaraki yanks the remote out of Magne’s hand and turns up the volume on the TV to drown them out. “ – pleased to report a lack of severe injuries to the passengers, courtesy of the gradual stop achieved by what was first believed to be a civilian acting without authorization,” the newscaster is saying. They’re on the scene. There’s an ambulance in the background. “We’ve since confirmed that the individual responsible for the save is an off-duty hero by the name of Skynet. We have her right here –”
The camera zooms in on you, just in time for you to spit a mouthful of blood into the gutter. Magne was right – you look like shit – and Toga was right – you’re covered in blood. You’re not wearing your costume, and your clothes are pretty shredded. You wipe your mouth on the back of your hand and stand up straight, grimacing. Shigaraki’s taken his share of hits in battle before. He’s impressed against his will.
The interviewer is asking you a bunch of questions, and Shigaraki listens carefully. Now that he knows how powerful your quirk actually is, he needs as many clues as possible about how it works. He picks up things here and there, but he keeps getting distracted by you. By the blood dripping from the corner of your mouth. By the big, bloody scrapes across your torso. By the way one of your shoulders is pretty obviously dislocated, and the fact that you’re standing there doing an interview when you should be getting help. Shigaraki doesn’t need to ask a stupid question about whether or not you’re okay. He knows you’re not. Why does he care?
Because you were off-duty. Because this wasn’t your job. Because you got in trouble for letting Shigaraki go at Kamino and still jumped onto the tracks to get dragged four hundred yards behind an out-of-control train. The heroic system is bullshit, and there’s nothing defensible about it, but that train probably had hundreds of people on it, and they’d be dead if it wasn’t for you. Being a hero is idiotic at best. But if it’s possible to do an idiotic thing the right way, you’re doing it.
The interviewer is asking you why you stepped in when you weren’t on duty, and you’re getting pretty visibly annoyed. Spinner is the only person other than Shigaraki who’s still watching. “She’s underground, right?” he asks. Shigaraki nods without looking away from the screen. “She acts like a true hero. Stain would approve.”
Shigaraki doesn’t give a shit what the Hero Killer thinks about anything. But he has a really bad feeling that he’s starting to give a shit about you. What the hell is he supposed to do about it?
Turn you, obviously. The League could use a quirk like yours, and it would be a serious blow to hero society for an established hero to join forces with Shigaraki. You probably weren’t trying to get Shigaraki’s attention by stopping a speeding train, but you’ve got his attention now, for a good reason instead of a stupid one. The thought of your feelings for him is a lot less uncomfortable now that they’re something he can use.
Kurogiri gets back from the doctor with bad news – the doctor can’t help them right now, because they’re taking too much heat. It sounds like bullshit to Shigaraki, but he has something else on his mind. He talks to Kurogiri away from the others. “Find out where Skynet lives.”
Kurogiri looks surprised. “Why?”
“She’s stronger than I thought. We can use her.”
“I see,” Kurogiri says, but he’s giving Shigaraki a weird look. “Why do you need to know where she lives?”
“So I can let her know I’m interested,” Shigaraki says. Kurogiri’s expression doesn’t shift. “I don’t have to tell her what I’m interested in.”
Kurogiri’s still making a weird face. As much as Kurogiri can make any kind of face. ��Right?” Shigaraki prompts, and Kurogiri nods. “Right. Once we know where she is, what should I do?”
“Something subtle,” Kurogiri suggests. “Consider it while I seek the information you requested.”
Something subtle. Easy enough. Shigaraki feels better about the whole thing than he has since he ran into you for the first time. You’re in love with him? That’s fine. If you love him so much, you can help him destroy the world.
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