#S&B Chapter 7
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Six of Crows- Chapter 19 (Leigh Bardugo)
Yeah, since it stopped being unique, so ~anyone~ can conveniently do it. It was probably forbidden by the Darkling as too effeminate or generally useless skill or something...
Shadow and Bone- Chapter 7
#Grishaverse#SoC Chapter 19#Tailors#Corporalki#Matthias Helvar#grishanalyticritical#S&B Chapter 7#Six of Crows#Six of Crows duology#V#books#quotes#Leigh Bardugo#anti Leigh Bardugo#fucking retcons
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Only one Grisha wore black, was permitted to wear black.
Shadow and Bone- Chapter 3
General Kirigan: “Did you not like the color [black] I chose for you?”
Alina: “You're the only one who wears it.”
Shadow and Bone 01×04: Otkazat’sya
The kefta was deepest midnight blue and fell nearly to my feet. The sleeves were wide, and though it was a lot like a coat, it was so elegant I felt as if I were wearing a gown. Then I noticed the embroidery at the cuffs. Like all Grisha, the Etherealki indicated their designation within their order by color of embroidery: pale blue for Tidemakers, red for Inferni, and silver for Squallers. My cuffs were embroidered in gold.
Shadow and Bone- Chapter 8
Alina: “I'm not wearing your color ever again.”
Alina: *proceeds to take off her black kefta with golden accents to reveal black dress underneath*
Shadow and Bone 02×02: Rusalye
For example, the kefta the Darkling is wearing in Season 2, “has the little gold thread sewn through what was all black before.” That’s intentional, and Ben sees it as Kirigan and Alina “leaving a piece of each other” in one another...
fangirlish.com
The throne room was three stories high, every window sparkling with gold double eagles. A long, pale blue carpet ran the length of the room to where the members of the court milled about a raised throne. Many of the men wore military dress, black trousers and white coats laden with medals and ribbons.
Shadow and Bone- Chapter 7
Shadow and Bone 01×05: Show Me Who You Are
... in pale blue and gold, the Ravkan double eagle.
Siege and Storm- Chapter 4
... pale blue and gold of the Ravkan king.
Siege and Storm- Chapter 15
Nikolai “The Ravkan King” Lantsov: *wears black and gold for his coronation*
If you were trying to tell us something, you might have sent completely different message than you intended to. Politics are a thing and the choice of outfit for coronation would cause some serious trouble to second-born, probably bastard marrying Living Saint, yet still not otkazat’sya or even a noble...
STILL NOT OVER NIKOLAI WEARING BLACK AND GOLD FOR HIS CORONATION
#Shadow and Bone#02×08: No Funerals#Nikolai Lantsov#The Darkling#General Kirigan#Alina Starkov#Darkolina#S&B Chapter 3#01×04: Otkazat'sya#S&B Chapter 8#02×02: Rusalye#S&B Chapter 7#01×05: Show Me Who You Are#S&S Chapter 4#S&S Chapter 15#Ravka#grishanalyticritical#anti S&B writers
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she’s so proud of herself…
#forgot all about this bonus till i rearranged my merch drawer earlier lmao#[sighs and adds to the chizuchan raws folder]#[pokes ani.mate] still no vol 2 bonuses yet…?#i hope there’s a wholesome and/or funny vol 2 bonus to offset chapters 6 and 7 (delusional)#i dont think i’ll tl the bonus manga (if there’s actually one) for vol 2 thoughhhh. im still soooooo far behind on idolsengen#in fact im so far behind that i organised my merch drawer as a means of procrastination… s i g h s#though it seems that i have more mona merch than i thought lmao.#kinda thinking of tling the volume summaries of idolsengen thoughhhh. it never crossed my mind to do it till now tbh#(the summary bits at the back of the volumes arent included with the ebook)#but aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ani.mate bonus announcements w h e n#they’re p consistent with bonuses so…#all of the artist’s previous hw manga vols ([redacted] manga included) came with bonus manga so…#a n d all 5 of idolsengen’s vols came with a bonus shikishi (s o b s) sooooooooo#no clue about the dolce manga though… that ended eons ago…#but i gotta say… the dolce manga is kinda similar in vibes to the chizuchan manga#it’s all fun and games for a while then suddenly *the plot* hits you like a truck#especially with the fuuma-centric chapters at the end of each volume… the shirayuki siblings… man.#fuuma crossdressing to look like his sister to make her dream of becoming an idol come true (if only in appearance)…#shiina being so loved by everyone around her and *so* close to becoming an idol herself…#and fuuma having to face the reality that he may not get to help his sister live out her idol dreams in the way he wants to for much longer…#…yeah. i miss dolce…#…no clue where im going with this bc this was supposed to be about chizuchan manga bonuses but here’s where we’ve ended up ig#anyways read the dolce manga. it’s good for your skin (lies)#(jk but the *plot* part of the dolce manga plot is heartbreaking. everyone should read it)#chizuchan manga 🤝 idolsengen 🤝 dolce manga: hw idol series manga with a hard-hitting *plot* underneath the frills and ribbons and silliness#(though granted idolsengen is usually only silly in the bonus chapters. thank you moge for your hard work)#o k that’s enough thinking for 1 day; back to sobbing over the shirayuki sibs
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Questions to all my Pikmin fans out there, I am the only one who just pulls out one of the four (main) game's ost and just goes through the whole thing in one sitting? I've done it with the first game like three times this week and it's only Wednesday, why are the songs such BANGERS.
#pikmin#who gave Beady the right to have a banger boss theme#WHO GAVE THE RIGHT TO GIVE GOD DAMN BUG-EYED CRAWMAD A BANGER BOSS THEME#WHAT THE HELL PIKMIN WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME#I mean it's good keep doing it BUT STILL#yeah but like have you ever had Challenge Mode on lop that shit slaps HARD#And yes this post includes both Louie and Olimar versions of songs I'm not a coward I listen to b o t h#also love how the freaking Phosbat Cave is just has the most youtube chapters they really just went 'give it the good shit'#btw Phosbat Cave has 19 chapters thank the lightbub phases if you're in the dark and if the Phosbat is near you not me#and for reference the Titan Dweevil has at max (if you count all weapons and phase transitions) 12. (7 if us Olimar12345's video)#btw shoutout to Olimar12345 they are my savor for this music dude
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𝖋𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖈𝖍𝖔𝖘𝖊𝖓!
comment to be added to the taglist for this story!
»»————> presenting;
pairing: barbarian!prince! Katsuki Bakugo x chief!daughter! reader.
synopsis: an arranged marriage to the prince of the barbarian clan to save your kingdom from being wiped out... cliche innit. stem's off the MHA fantasy au!
content warnings: FEMALE READER! strangers to lovers! slow burn! MHA fantasy AU! adult themes! arranged marriage! sexual content! rough n gruff Katsuki! mentions of blood in a lot of scenes! rituals! dub-con in some scenes! (for caution, because y'all can't understand each other) if u're religious, PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION!!! angst! fluff! smut! WARNINGS APPLY TO ALL CHAPTERS!!! and are there to exercise caution!
updated on Wednesdays and Saturdays!
𝖕𝖗𝖔𝖑𝖔𝖌𝖚𝖊↓; 2.5k+ words
»»————> LORE! [you can continue without reading all this]
the barbarian clan is known for conquering any village, kingdom and/or empire. they are brutes, usually settling anything by waging war and desecrating the land.
the barbarians speak in old Norse! conversing is difficult...
Katsuki is the only son and prince of the barbarian clan.
barbarians are stronger and bigger in size than regular humans.
your kingdom is ruled by your father—called cheif instead of king—who's a big softy and doesn't see the point in things like war... he prefers to talk things out and leave casualties to a zero. even if that means marrying off his only daughter...
you are the only daughter of your father which only makes you more precious and worthy of bearing the heir of both your kingdom and their clan.
tetsugami; a huge, semi intelligent crab. [there are few now as people have hunted them down to the double digits.]
crimson dragons; giant flying lizards. [they are very friendly despite their mean looking faces & their scales are extremely valuable.]
(more coming soon)
Old Norse Alphabet;
1. A/a- Pronunciation: ah as in "father."
2. B/b- Pronunciation: b as in "bed."
3. D/d- Pronunciation: d as in "dog."
4. Ð/ð (called eth)- Pronunciation: Soft th as in "this."
5. E/e- Pronunciation: eh as in "bed."
6. F/f- Pronunciation: f as in "fox." Between vowels, pronounced as v.
7. G/g- Pronunciation: g as in "go." After certain vowels, it softens to a y sound.
8. H/h- Pronunciation: h as in "house."
9. I/i- Pronunciation: ee as in "see."
10. J/j- Pronunciation: y as in "yes."
11. K/k- Pronunciation: k as in "king."
12. L/l- Pronunciation: l as in "lamp."
13. M/m- Pronunciation: m as in "man."
14. N/n- Pronunciation: n as in "name."
15. O/o- Pronunciation: aw as in "law."
16. P/p- Pronunciation: p as in "pen."
17. R/r- Pronunciation: Rolled r, like in Spanish or Italian.
18. S/s- Pronunciation: s as in "see."
19. T/t- Pronunciation: t as in "top."
20. U/u- Pronunciation: oo as in "moon."
21. V/v- Pronunciation: Often interchangeable with f, pronounced like English v.
22. Y/y- Pronunciation: Similar to ee but with rounded lips, like French u in lune.
23. Þ/þ (called thorn)- Pronunciation: Hard th as in "thorn."
24. Æ/æ- Pronunciation: ai as in "air."
25. Ö/ö- Pronunciation: ur as in "bird" (without the r).
M-LIST!
𝖕𝖗𝖔𝖑𝖔𝖌𝖚𝖊 𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 1 𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 2 𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 3.5 𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 3.5
marriage. the best thing that could ever happen to a girl. all your life, you'd imagined being a bride; delicately decorating your hair with wild tulips, adorning your body in silver and white silk. spending the rest of your life with the person you love most.
now you're here, kneeling in front of a bonfire beside a complete stranger, cloaked in boar fur and animal skeletons, as the thick, warm blood of a lamb is poured over you. your marriage ceremony... filled with unfamiliar faces—including your now-husband—and traditions. drinking, dancing, and celebrating the union.
"nú ger hana konu þína!" a spiked-blonde woman, with an uncanny resemblance to the man kneeling beside you, announced, raising her hands in the air. you looked around confused as ever, as he leaned in, blood-stained fingers pulling you in by the back of your neck. your nose scrunched at the metallic taste of blood that his tongue shoved past your teeth. you push him away, gasping at the foreign feeling.
"hvat í helvíti, kona!?" he frowned, turning away from you, mumbling something under his breath, that you didn’t quite catch. not that you'd understand what he was carrying on about anyways...
the spiked-blonde woman—whom you guessed to be some sort of priestess or elder—shot you a sharp glare, her arms lowering slowly as she spoke in a hushed yet commanding tone. her words were incomprehensible to you, but the crowd seemed to murmur in agreement. your husband huffed, his frown deepening as he looked at you over his shoulder. you were kneeling there, with eyes pressing on you from all directions. the fire crackled in the silence, and the warmth of it did little to ease the chill settling in your chest.
two women approached you, their faces painted with intricate swirls of red and black. they tugged you to your feet without a word and began guiding you toward a tent decorated with bones, animal pelts, and dried herbs hanging from the entrance. inside, it was dimly lit by a few small lanterns. the air smelled of earth, smoke, and something sweet but unfamiliar.
they gestured for you to sit on a low stool and began pulling at your ceremonial garb, their movements quick but not unkind. your protests fell on deaf ears as they stripped you of the heavy fur cloak, wiping the blood from your skin with damp cloths. one of them muttered something, shaking her head as she scrubbed at your face. it was clear they didn't understand you either, but their disapproving looks were universal.
by the time they were finished, you were dressed in a simpler gown of rough-spun fabric, a far cry from the silks you were used to and had imagined for your wedding night. the older of the two handed you a wooden cup filled with a thick, bitter scented liquid. she pointed to it, then your mouth, her expression stern. reluctantly, you sipped it, grimacing at the taste. the woman nodded, seemingly satisfied, before they left you alone in the tent.
you sat there, staring at your hands, trying to gather your thoughts, but instead, they drift back to just a few mere hours ago...
-
"arranged?" you seethed in disbelief, looking at your defeated father, seated across from you at the council table, surrounded by old wrinkled elders.
"yes, daughter," he affirmed, voice devoid of emotion. "war against the barbarian clan would destroy everything we've built—"
"so they made a proposal, a very very rare one," one of the wart ridden elders interrupted-
"to make an arrangement," another continued-
"one that cannot be broken once forged," -
"a marriage,"-
"your sacrifice would save us all, child," the eldest croaked, concluding the proposal, "and as the chief's daughter, it is your duty to your people." one after the other, they all slowly turned their heads toward you, kneeling at the center of their godforsaken grey gazes.
your eyes flickered between them, their crinkled foreheads making you feel sick to your stomach as their words wrung your heartstrings. "marriage is sacred... it can only happen once. i don't know this person that you'd like me to be bound to for the rest of my life..." you snarled, stating the very obvious to those expired raisins.
"i'm afraid you misunderstood us, girl," the eldest fumed, weakly slamming his fist down, "it is arranged. you will wed the heir of the barbarian clan. that is why you have been summoned." firmly raising from his seat to intimidate you.
"that is my daughter you're speaking to, elder... as old as you are, mind your tongue." your father shifted his attention to you. "unfortunately, he is right, my dear. it's already been arranged, and you are to be wed at sundown."
dumbfounded... that's the look on your face. they we're giving you away to complete strangers... and at sundown!? despite all the colorful words that wanted to fly out your mouth, you grit your teeth and settled with a curt nod. you do have a duty to your people.
though it wasn't supposed to happen like this. it was supposed to be the happiest day of your life. you only get married once in your entire life after all.
-
the sound of heavy footsteps outside the tent snapped you out of your thoughts. the flap was pulled aside roughly, and your husband stepped in. his presence filled the small space, his broad shoulders and wild blonde hair almost brushing the top of the tent as his crimson eyes bore into you, a mixture of frustration and curiosity in his gaze.
he said something, his voice sharp and demanding, but you could only blink up at him in confusion. "i don't understand you," you said softly, shaking your head, as your voice trembled, despite your efforts to stay composed.
he huffed, combing a hand through his hair before pointing at you and then gesturing to the pallet of furs in the corner of the tent. his tone suggested he was giving you an order. when you didn't move, he groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose.
"leggjask. sofa." he barked, his frustration very much evident. when you still didn't respond, he crossed the space between you in two long strides, grabbing your wrist and pulling you to your feet. the roughness of his grip made you wince, but he didn't seem to notice as he guided you toward the furs. he pointed again, his expression leaving no room for argument.
you hesitated, thinking that maybe he wanted you to lie down, and slowly you lower yourself onto the makeshift bed. he stood over you for a moment, his intense gaze making your skin prickle, before he turned and left the tent without another word.
you let out a shaky breath, your heart pounding in your chest. you were alone in an unfamiliar place, surrounded by strangers who you couldn't even get to know, married to a man you didn't understand. tears pricked at the corners of your eyes with the overwhelming thoughts, but you blinked them away, refusing to let yourself break down on your wedding night.
the two women that cleaned you up earlier came back with him, and they began to remove his furs. you quickly averted your eyes, feeling a heat crawling up your neck, as the thought of them removing more than just his cloak tainted your mind.
"nei!" the old one scolded, "Þú verður að líta!" ... why are they babbling their jibberish when they know you don't understand them... "she said, 'you must look'," the younger translated, seeing the confused wrinkle in your brows. oh thank the gods! you smiled briefly at the familiar words before coming back to your senses.
"must i?" you blush, slowly turning back to them.
"yes," she smiled, cleansing your huge husband before your eyes, "if you do not, you give chance for another woman," she carefully rubbed the damp cloth over his bloody forehead while you let the thought sink in.
"leave," you softly ordered, "I'll take care of my husband," and without hesitation she whispered to the old lady, they dropped everything and left. ain't no way you were about to let your husband be seduced away on the night of your union...
gently, you wrung the cloth of most of its water and brought it back up to his face, wiping away the dust and dried blood that covered little scars freckling his almost perfect face.
his eyes burned through your skull with his staring, slowly scanning over the curves and dips of your body as you moved. your finger danced over his skin, tracing the scar on his right cheekbone, moving down to brush past his thin lips, wiping away the remnants of dirt on his well built, chest. he seemed to relax against your touch, closing his piercing crimson eyes, and hanging his head back to let you do your work.
so soft... and smooth... the texture of his skin isn't what you expected. who would've thought that such a rough looking barbarian had the skin of a baby? would explain all the scars though. like this one running down his neck to his collarbone, and these over here trailing down his firm biceps. you almost forgot you were supposed to be cleaning him up... you've finished the upper half and tugged at the leather holding his pants up, struggling to get them undone.
a low chuckle rumbled in his throat and your eyes shot up up to his smirking face, "what's so funny?" you quiver, frowning, as he shifted to stand, undoing the leather and dropping his pants to the dirt floor. "þar," he rasped, smug at your flustered state.
having those women clean him up was starting to seem more and more reasonable now... nevertheless, you dippied the cloth in the bowl of warm water and squeezed it, before wiping at his lower abdomen. you're so adorable between his legs like that, avoiding his eyes at all costs, while you wipe your way down and around, to his back. again, your hands moved of their own accord, twitching along the scupletd bumps on his back.
he grunted softly as your fingers worked over the knots in his shoulders, his broad frame shifting slightly under your touch. emboldened by the lack of protest, you continued, pressing harder into the muscles along his spine. his head dipped forward, and a low sigh escaped his lips, sending a wave of warmth through you. he brought a large hand up to yours on his shoulders and guided you in front of him.
both your eyes reflected in each other's for a long moment before you tried to break the silence, your words sounding like nonsensical ringing in his ears. he pulled you into his chest, just holding you there in an attempt to shush you, closing his eyes as his brows pinched over them.
"what's your name?" you asked softly, your voice barely audible over the crackling of the distant bonfire. you paused, waiting for a response, but he didn't seem to react, his eyes still closed as if savoring the moment. you tried again, a little louder this time, "what is your name?" you pointed at his chest.
he peeped through his eyelids, a sliver of vermilion meeting yours with a flicker of confusion. "nafnið mitt?" he asked, the foreign words rolling off his tongue. he tilted his head, as though trying to piece together what you were asking.
you frowned, gesturing to yourself. "i'm…" you said your name slowly, pointing at your chest, then gestured to him, raising your brows expectantly.
he blinked, mildly confused, before a smirk tugged at his lips. "Katsuki," he said, his voice low and rough. he tapped his chest, meeting your eyes again. "Kat-su-ki," he repeated, in the same manner you pronounced yours, ensuring you understood.
"Ka-tsu-ki…" you tested the name on your tongue, the unfamiliar syllables feeling oddly satisfying. his smirk widened slightly, pleased that you had caught on.
you nodded, offering a small smile in return, then gestured to yourself again. "my name is…" you repeated your name slowly once more, hoping to bridge the language barrier. his brows furrowed, lips moving as he attempted to mimic the unfamiliar sounds. his effort was clumsy but endearing, and you couldn't help the small laugh that escaped you.
his frown deepened at your amusement. he murmured your name under his breath a few more times, his pronunciation improving with each attempt, until he finally said it with enough accuracy to make you grin.
"that's right!" you cheered softly, nodding in approval.
he held your gaze for a moment longer, his expression unreadable, before his hand came up to gently brush against your cheek. his touch was surprisingly tender, his calloused fingers rough against your skin, but warm.
"sofa," he murmured again, his tone softer this time. he gestured toward the furs, his crimson eyes watching you closely.
you hesitated, unsure if he was commanding you or simply suggesting something. this is it. you thought, heart racing, as you slowly nodded, giving him a glance over your shoulder, before crawling onto the makeshift bed.
he stood for a moment, watching as you adjusted yourself among the furs, before he joined, sinking beside your head with his weight on his palms, caging you in under him. his hair fell beautifully over his narrow, glowing eyes, his nose brushing against yours as he lowered to your quivering lips, sucking them between his, tugging at your plump bottom lip with his teeth.
footsteps thumping right outside your tent made your heart race, thinking someone was coming, but he didn't stop, nor did he care, he hiked up the thin fabric of your dress, his large hand caressing your upper thigh as he shed the leather covering his— good god... you look down and your eyes widened. he smirked and hooked the strap of your dress with a finger to pull it down, and expose your heaving chest.
"Katsuki!" the blonde woman from earlier yelled, barging into the tent, "Tak hendur þínar af henni, þú þarft at vera við ráðsafn. núna!"
"För Guðs sakar, kona!" he yelled back, moving himself off you to sit. he looked up at her worried frown... "Ek kem..." you had no idea what was happening... eyes darting between them as their words flowed out of their mouth and their hands moved in frustration as they spoke.
katsuki looked back at you, a worried expression overtaking the lustful one he had mere seconds ago. he kneeled down kissed you, then threw on his cloak and left. the woman rested a comforting hand on your shoulder, gently smiling before she too headed out, leaving you alone, following behind your husband.
»»————> 𝖙𝖗𝖆𝖓𝖘𝖑𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓𝖘; <————««
❈ "Nú ger hana konu þína." - now make her your wife
❈ "hvat í helvíti, kona!?" - what in the hell woman!?
❈ "þar" - there
❈ "nafnið mitt?" - my name?
❈ "leggjask" lie down
❈ "sofa" - sleep
❈ "Katsuki! Tak hendur þínar af henni, þú þarft at vera við ráðsafn. núna!"- katsuki! take your hands off her, you need to be at the council gathering. now!
❈ "För Guðs sakar, kona!" - for gods sake, woman!
❈ "Ek kem..." - I'm coming...
hope u enjoyed and look forward to more! don't forget to comment to be added to the taglist! mwah~♡
mlist!
#bbkoolkatz#mha x reader#x reader#kkz mha#x reader writer#bakugo x reader#bakugou x reader#katsuki bakugo x reader#katsuki x reader#x fem!reader#kkz fics#kkz the barbarian prince!#katsuki x you#katsuki bakugou x reader#bakugou katsuki#bakugo x you#bakugo x y/n#angst to fluff#slight angst#slightly suggestive#fluff#bnha fanfiction#bnha x reader#bnha bakugo x reader#mha bakugo x reader#mha bakugou#bnha bakugou#bnha fantasy au#mha fantasy au
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theweeklydiscourse:
Had Alina reflected on Aleksander’s words to her, she might have been able to reconsider her own prejudice and how that could impact her fragile self-image and the lives of others. Alina is like a giant who is unaware of her size, she continues as she always has without any regard for her surroundings or the potentially catastrophic consequences of her actions (or inaction). When she runs from the little palace, she briefly considers the enormity of her actions and how it could affect the country before dismissing those thoughts on the basis of “Well the Darkling is clearly evil and I know in my heart that Baghra was right”. Her biased thoughts are literally RIGHT THERE but are never truly unpacked after Shadow and Bone.
Bardugo was SO CLOSE to creating this compelling narrative about the heroine realizing her internalized prejudice and going on to become a heroic figure who could save her long lost community. But, she instead opted for a far more shallow narrative that fails to grapples with the social issues she included in the story!
The Darkling decided early on how much he would disclose to Alina about his plans for the coup based on a conversation they had on the way to the palace.
I like to look back at this scene from Shadow and Bone that takes place after Alina was seconds away from being killed by a Fjerdan assassin. She denies that she is Grisha, pointing to her plain and scrawny appearance for proof of her certainty and Aleksander responds with a remark about how Alina doesn’t understand what being Grisha even means.
It’s a telling scene because it shows just how surface-level Alina’s view of Grisha is. To her, Grisha are shiny, beautiful and strong and they are prioritized over the common folk soldiers she once belonged with. Of course, Aleksander knows that there is so much more to being Grisha than just beauty, but realizes that there’s so much to unpack with Alina’s statement he doesn’t even know where to start.
This exchange explains one of the reasons why he didn’t disclose his true plans to Alina, much less his ultimate secret. If Alina has such a shallow understanding of Grisha identity, she will also have a shallow understanding of just how much is at stake in this conflict. Alina is no ordinary Grisha, so it hasn’t quite sunk in that she has skin in the game and is more significant than she realizes. Her denial of her Grisha identity (despite obvious evidence proving otherwise) Alina is staunch in her assertion that she is just a normal girl. It is that same denial that tells Aleksander that Alina cannot be viewed as reliable just yet, time needs to be taken to teach her a better understanding of the Grisha first.
This next exchange is the second reason why Aleksander doesn’t tell her. Although Alina herself may not have said that superstition out loud, but it demonstrates how Alina was exposed to those views during her formative years. It raises his suspicion that Alina may hold some remnants of the Serf’s ideas and perhaps compels him to think ahead to assess if this could grow into a potential threat. He ABSOLUTELY cannot tell her the truth anytime soon if there is even the slightest possibility that she believes that he’s soulless and “truly evil”. If Alina snitched on him, his entire operation could be shut down for good and set the Grisha back decades. Not to mention the fact that it could get a lot of Grisha killed.
“You didn’t hurt his feelings.” Dear Reader, this was only the beginning of Alina denying Aleksander’s humanity in order to avoid taking responsibility for her prejudice and to avoid the complex reality of the situation. You can almost hear the incorrect answer buzzer go off in Aleksander’s mind as Alina tells him her answer, I can almost feel his pure disappointment through the page.
Because Aleksander poses an important question that reveals one of Alina’s central conflicts that will continue throughout the trilogy. Alina is still deeply uncomfortable with the idea of Grisha powers after spending her life among people who call them unnatural and strange. To the point that it wasn’t just the fact that the assassin was sliced in two that bothered her, but because of the magic that sliced him. Why on earth would he trust her with his greatest secret when she reacts with such hesitation? He was testing her to gauge how long it would be before Alina could be trusted as an ally to Grisha and received an answer that told him it might take a while. If Alina can’t handle her the idea of her own powers, she cannot be trusted with a secret that could determine the future of Ravka.
I don’t know about you, but I fully believe that Aleksander had every intention of telling Alina the truth, it’s just that considering his personal relationship with her over the safety of his people was a risk he couldn’t take. This gets a bit muddled later on because Alina’s narration seems to care more about her personal feelings of betrayal than the consequences this plan could have on the country. She never takes a moment to look at the bigger picture and consider the consequences of her reckless actions.
I know that I’m just breaking the scene down and explaining what’s happening in it, but it truly is such an informative scene that hints at a potentially fascinating storyline.
#Grishaverse#S&B Chapter 5#Alina Starkov#The Darkling#S&B Chapter 7#S&B Chapter 9#Darklina#self centred and paranoid#Genya Safin#Grisha#S&B Chapter 16#Shadow and Bone (book)#grishanalyticritical#anti Leigh Bardugo#It's already here
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This Week (x2) in Tomarrymort (8 – 21 November 2024)
Hello! We have three multi-chaptered fics finishing this week, highlighted below. In addition, I made a rec list for Tomarrymort Necrophilia Fics 💀🤍 in support of the Tomarrymort Necro Fest hosted by @magical-menagerie-server, which kicks off in January.
Completed Fic:
Memories of a Killer by @chemfreak89 (M, 47k, complete) Age catches up with everyone. The infamous serial killer Voldemort now spends his time reading newspapers and making trips to the local library in search of a new crime novel. But one day he makes an interesting new acquaintance that shakes his quiet life and rekindles old flames and unknown desires. What quickens me is the violence in thee by @i-dream-of-libraries (M, 17k, complete) Harry is sold at auction to a man who is clearly in some kind of disguise - Lord Riddle isn't as charming as he looks, and the way he looks at Harry... A Regency AU inspired by the magnificent artwork of @stolenviolet. If I were you by @onehitpleb (E, 9k, complete) It is 1945 and Tom is eighteen, freshly graduated, and working a non-reputable job as a store clerk in Knockturn Alley. Somehow, he grows attached to the worst sort of person - an idiot.
In addition, a recap of the author notes from last week! (Please feel free to add some extra context to your fic update in the reblog, such as a little bit about the chapter(s) updated, and I’ll throw it in the update for next week!)
A Simple Request by @shyinsunlight (E, 70k, WIP) “As for the new chapter of A Simple Request, Harry tries and (unsurprisingly) fails to keep his personal life private. Some are having the time of their life, some others, not so much. Lifts can take you up, but going down is more interesting.” Wish by @sri-verse (E, 3k, WIP) “Wish is set after Harry's fifth year where he gets the ownership of Bellatrix's vault along side the Black vault. Looking at a gold goblet, he remembers his childhood wish of buying a gold cauldron and brings back Helga Hufflepuff's cup with him to fulfill that desire, unaware that he has freed the horcrux living in it.” To the Hilt by @izharmilgram (E, 28k, WIP) “To The Hilt is a royal arranged marriage au featuring nontraditional a/b/o, political schemes, ancient greek and abrahamic religion references, feral harry potter, and lots of power play and worship. It's neither only tomarry or only harrymort, but tomarrymort—meaning the core relationship is Tom/Harry/Voldemort. This includes Tom/Voldemort.” we made universes out of bitten lips and broken hands by @boyneptunee (M, 50k, WIP) “The consequences of Harry's Time Travel seem inconsequential, at first. Until they stare right back at him with vicious eyes. There's trouble brewing in every direction, and the Future is not as certain and set in stone as one might think.” Time Stumbler by @wintumnly (T, 102k, WIP) “Harry is stuck in 1937 and spends the holidays with almost-eleven-year-old Tom Riddle. On the first day of Christmas, they both anxiously wait for Tom's Hogwarts letter together. Fluff, humor, and Tom Riddle is not good with feelings." 7 by @moontearpensfic (E, 44k, WIP) “Harry goes back in time to raise Tom AU: the boys discuss what might have happened to make Voldemort go to "sleep."” Anytime, Anywhere, Always by @moontearpensfic (E, 22k, WIP) “Harry corrupts Tom AU: Tom and Harry celebrate Christmas--and something more! Your Wish, My Command by @moontearpensfic (E, 8k, WIP) “Hinny adopts Tom AU: Tom finally gets Harry to crack. 🔥”
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Tomarrymort One Shots and Completed Fic
Complete | Chapters 8 and 9 of Memories of a Killer by @chemfreak89
Complete | Chapter 6 of What quickens me is the violence in thee by @i-dream-of-libraries
Complete | Chapter 4 of If I were you by @onehitpleb
Complete | Chapter 19 of Sits the wind in that quarter by @mosiva
One Shot | To be Imagined by @cyandenial
One Shot | god's hands by @curioushabitforarivergod
One Shot | bad behaviour by @milkandmoon-ao3
One Shot | two ways of being: the noun & the verb by cycloalkane
One Shot | set my soul on fire by @wynnefic
One Shot | Beach Episode by @crowcrowcrowthing
One Shot | First Duel by @being-luminous
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Tomarrymort Ongoing Fics
Chapter 12 of Ills of Murder by @shadow-of-the-eclipse
Chapters 7 through 11 of in the silence by @satflesk22
Chapter 4 of friend of the devil (a friend of mine) by @shyinsunlight
Chapter 15 of Embryo by @cannibalinc
Chapter 4 of As It Begins by @duplicitywrites @moontearpensfic
Chapters 7 and 8 of Stygian by @crowcrowcrowthing
Chapters 15 through 17 of Saint Harry by @alenablack @chaos-bear
Chapter 1 of the night is cold in the kingdom by @girl-with-goats
Chapters 5 and 6 of you speak of the devil (like he's not your friend) by @amuria
Chapters 131 through 134 of Liquida Tenebris (Remastered) by @dymis
Chapters 1 and 2 of Small Mistakes by Crisis_Brewing
Chapter 5 of Hit 'N Run by @dragonaireabsolvare
Chapter 11 of Days always end in sunsets by @d00medbythenarrative
Chapter 25 of Time Stumbler by @wintumnly
Chapters 8 and 9 of Venom or Valor by @lightningant
Chapter 21 of Outrunning the Villain in You by @zenyteehee
Chapters 6 through 8 of To the Hilt by @izharmilgram
Chapter 9 of Do It Over by @thefangirlibrarian
Chapter 2 of Infinite by @moontearpensfic
Chapter 2 of Prizefighter by @dragonaireabsolvare
Chapter 8 of Fetters of the Damned by @sc0rpiflow3r
Chapters 13 and 14 of Hole in the Wall by tomrddle
Chapters 23 and 24 of Learning to love by @l-archiduchesse
Chapter 13 of He Who Shall Not Be Changed by @moontimefilter
Chapter 17 of Last Son of Black by @treacleteacups
Chapter 6 of Dreams Beyond Blood by @hikarimeroperiddle
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#tomarry#tomarrymort#harrymort#tomarrymort recs#aethon recs#tomarry recs#ao3 recs#fanfic recs#hp fic recs#harrymort recs#tomarry weekly#this week in tomarrymort
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Sweet Pumpkin Chapter 1
Summary: Bucky is struggling with the dating world and knows that if he ever hopes to have a serious relationship, that he needs to get through his touch deprivation issues. It’s not that he doesn’t want to touch people, or them to touch him, but after decades of pain he doesn’t know how to accept physical intimacy from others, or how to give it himself. He hires Y/N, an intimacy coach and professional cuddler, who comes highly recommended. Will his heart be able to distinguish between a service given versus real love?
Warnings: mentions of past violence and past sexual assault, language, physical intimacy, eventual smut
**curvy reader
Next chapter
Bucky had walked out on his date. He rubbed his face harshly in embarrassment and shame. She seemed nice, but was overly flirtatious, and kept reaching out and touching his hand, his arm, even ran her fingers through the front of his hair, then had all the audacity to trace her finger over his lower lip. He’d pulled back harshly at that point, excusing himself to the bathroom, but instead swerved to the host stand, paid for the food and ran like his life depended on it. He’d gotten home and immediately showered, scrubbing the spots she’d touched nearly raw. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to be touched. He actually wanted it…craved it. But not like that. She was a stranger, and had felt some kind of entitlement to his personal space right off the bat.
He’d heard of people who suffered from touch starvation. Sam had hinted at it once when Bucky flinched away from the friendly touch of a fellow agent they had been working with on a stealth mission. Bucky knew he had a problem, but didn’t realize just how bad it was until the date. He sighed harshly as he dried himself off from the shower and got into his pajamas for the night. He picked up his phone and texted Sam.
B: What was the name of that intimacy coach you had mentioned?
S: Y/N Y/L/N. I’ll send you her info.
Bucky thanked him once her contact information popped up on his screen. He braced himself as he clicked on her phone number. He sent her a message, being vague but asking for help. He didn’t expect to get an answer back, seeing as how it was almost 11:00 p.m., but was surprised when she texted back within a few minutes.
Y/N: I’ve been wondering when you would reach out. How does Friday at 7:00 p.m sound?
Bucky gawked at her message.
B: Do we know each other?
Y/N: No, Sam just talks too much. ;)
He rolled his eyes. Of course Sam had already talked to her about him.
B: Now I’m worried.
Y/N: Don’t be.
B: Okay. Friday at 7.
Y/N: Awesome. Here’s my address…
***
Friday at 6:57 Bucky stood outside her door. He was fighting off his panic and stress. He needed this. This would be good for him. If he ever hoped to move on and have some semblance of a normal life he’d have to be able to accept love from others. He wanted this. He swallowed harshly and sighed before knocking on the door.
There were shuffling sounds from the other side and then it swung open. A woman stood in front of him that looked like the physical embodiment of softness. She was short, plump, and dressed in an all-off-white sweater and sweatpant outfit that looked like it was made of faux sherpa. She smiled up at him pleasantly, her eyes twinkling.
“Sergeant Barnes?” she asked.
Bucky just stared at her for a moment. Even her voice was soft. He nodded before clearing his throat. “Bucky. Y/N Y/L/N?”
“Yep,” she nodded. “Come on in.” She stepped back and held her arm out as a welcome gesture. Bucky gave her a quick, tight smile before walking inside. As she shut the door behind him he looked around her apartment. It was just as soft as she was. All the colors were muted with pastel greens, more off-whites mixed with rich browns from wooden accents littered around the decor. There were plants all along the windows, and since nightfall was setting in she had an array of small lamps on and candles lit around the main living room. In one corner of the room was a large mattress covered in the softest looking blankets and pillows he’d ever seen. Every surface seemed soft and cozy.
“Are you thirsty? I can get you some water, soda, juice, even alcohol if you need some liquid courage,” Y/N asked from behind him.
Bucky turned to look at her. She was watching him, the side of her mouth upturned in a small smirk. He felt like she could see through him, making him feel unnerved but also strangely understood at the same time. “I’m alright for now, thank you.”
Y/N nodded and then walked past him to one of the large chairs near the furthest window. “Well, how about you make yourself comfortable and tell me why you’re here?” she said, plopping down on the chair and grabbing a notebook and pen on a small side table sitting next to it.
Bucky blinked before toeing off his shoes and hanging up his jacket on the hook near the front door. He slowly walked over to the chair opposite her and sat down. She was watching him again, the smirk never leaving her face. “Well, uh, I’m not sure how much you already know about me and my past,” he started, his hands wringing in his lap, not quite meeting her gaze.
Y/N hummed. “Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes, born March 10, 1917, which would make you 107 years old now. Grew up in Brooklyn, New York. Drafted to join the army in WWII, where you were unfortunately captured, experimented on and tortured by Hydra. You’re best friend and newly made Captain America, Steve Rogers, rescued you and other prisoners and then made a team called the Howling Commandos. You were a sniper. You fell from a train during a mission and were presumed dead in 1943. And then reappeared decades later as the fist of Hydra, the Winter Soldier, where you were brainwashed and forced to do their bidding. From there it gets a bit muddy with specifics and government cover ups, but you made it out the other side a free man. And now I’m assuming you’re here talking to me of all people because after all that, you now struggle with being physically close to others because you’re afraid of more pain and being taken advantage of, yes?”
Bucky blinked at her in shock, slowly nodding his head. “Did Sam tell you all that?”
Y/N shook her head. “I do my research. Sam said you’re a great guy who just needs some help. And any friend of Sam’s is a friend of mine.”
Bucky slightly smirked back at her. “And how are you friend’s with Sam?”
“I was in his grief counseling support group at the VA,” Y/N said.
“Well you know an awful lot about me, but I know nothing about you. Makes me feel a bit out of my depth,” he confessed, his eyes narrowing at her.
“What do you wanna know?” Y/N asked, setting the notebook and pen back down on the side table, lifting her feet up to sit criss-cross.
Bucky took that as an invitation to get comfortable and leaned back in the chair more. “Same stuff you know about me would be a good start.”
Her smile widened. “Alright. I’m Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N. Born Y/B/D. Grew up in Queens, New York. I came from a military family, but never joined myself. I lost my brother to an IED in Baghdad. My parents died a year later from a car accident. Then I was sexually assaulted by a close friend.” Bucky frowned. “I went through a few years of severe depression, got some serious therapy then help from an intimacy coach. It made a huge impression on my life so I decided to get licensed and trained to be one, too. Now I’m here,” she said, looking around her apartment. “Any questions?” Bucky shook his head. “So what are you hoping to accomplish from this?” she asked him, reaching for her notebook again but not opening it.
He sighed again, looking down at his hands. “Sam and I talked about being touch starved. I’ve been through…a lot of shit,” he paused, swallowing harshly. “A lot of pain, in all different forms. But I want…I want to be able to open myself up to physical i-intimacy in the future,” he stuttered. “I went on a date the other night, and she was nice, but she kept touching me, and I couldn’t…I…” he shook his head, closing his eyes and frowning.
“Where did she touch that bothered you?” Y/N asked softly.
Bucky shifted in the chair, opening his eyes to glance at her. “My hand, my arm, but it was worse around my hair and my face,” he said quietly.
Y/N nodded in understanding. “That makes sense. Our heads, hair, our faces, are a lot more intimate than people think they are. So to have what I’m assuming was a stranger just randomly touch your hair and your face was triggering.” Bucky nodded. “Would it be okay if I move my chair close to yours?”
Bucky glanced at the space between their chairs. He slowly nodded and Y/N stood, dragging her chair close to where he was sitting. She sat back down and scooted the chair a little closer so that her crossed legs were next to his legs. She gave him an encouraging smile. “So how does it feel having me sit close to you like this?”
Bucky looked down at the few inches that separated their legs. “It’s fine,” he said.
Y/N nodded then scooted closer until her knees were touching his knees. “How about now?”
He could feel a small uptick in his heartbeat, but he breathed through it. “It’s…okay,” he said.
Y/N moved away from him, keeping the inches between them. “So not very comfortable,” she said with a knowing smile. Bucky huffed a silent laugh. “How about if I shook your hand?” she asked, sticking out her right hand.
Bucky quickly shook her hand. “That’s fine.”
“Because it’s formal,” Y/N assumed, her eyes narrowing at him.
“Yes,” he agreed.
She nodded again and released his hand. “Can I hold your hand?”
Bucky blinked rapidly. “Okay.” She waited for him to reach his hand out first, then leaned forward and slowly grasped his hand so that she was holding his fingers. They sat like that in silence for a moment.
“How does that feel?” Y/N asked, watching his face intently.
“It’s…” Bucky was breathing deeply, trying to keep any panic at bay. He couldn’t tell if it was the contact itself or the fact that it was contact with a pretty girl that was making his heart rate spike again. “It’s nice.”
Y/N smiled and then her thumb swept over his knuckles slowly. “And that?”
Bucky suddenly felt a rush of emotions. He couldn’t understand why, but something about her firm but gentle grasp on his fingers grounding him and then the soft affection of her thumb across his knuckles brought tears to his eyes. “That’s really nice,” he whispered, not trusting his voice.
Y/N kept holding his hand, her thumb randomly rubbing across his knuckles and squeezing his fingers lightly. She leaned forward a little more. “If I gave you permission to touch me, would that help?”
Bucky quickly sniffed then looked at her quizzically. “Touch you where?”
“My hands, my arms, my face,” she said. “The same places you were touched and unsure of.”
Bucky glanced at each spot on her body where the girl on the date had touched him. “Maybe,” he shrugged. Y/N let go of his hand and put her hands on her knees.
“Would it be easier for me to look at you while you do it or close my eyes?” she asked him.
“Close your eyes,” Bucky nodded. He wasn’t sure he could handle her deep, knowing gaze while he was allowed to touch her.
Y/N smiled at him then closed her eyes. Bucky looked at her for a long moment before reaching his hand out. He touched her right hand first, laying his hand flat on it, then paused. She didn’t move or flinch, her eyes staying closed. He then slipped his hand up to her forearm and gave it a light squeeze. Bucky then lifted his hand toward her head. His fingers were shaking as he slowly moved some of the hair at her forehead away like his date had done. Then his fingers traced down the side of her face until he was cupping her cheek.
Bucky sat there the longest. Y/N didn’t move, her face completely neutral as her eyes barely moved behind her eyelids. She was completely trusting in him. “Open your eyes,” he whispered. Y/N opened her eyes, blinking a couple of times as she looked at him. He stared at her, taking courage in her kind eyes. “She touched my lips,” he said, frowning in trepidation.
Y/N merely nodded at him. Bucky inhaled deeply, then watched as his thumb moved along her cheek until he swept it across her lower lip slowly. She still didn’t move, her gaze never straying from his eyes. When he was done he dropped his hand from her face, but didn’t lean away. “How did that feel?” she asked quietly.
“Good,” he answered just as quietly.
Y/N’s smile reappeared. “Good.” A ping from her phone had her breaking eye contact as she glanced at it. “Wow, it’s already time,” she said, leaning away from him. She smiled at him again. “I’d like for you to keep coming, Bucky, so we could work toward building your trust and comfort level with touch. Would you like to continue?”
Bucky nodded, his own smile brightening his face. “Yes, I’d like that.”
Y/N smiled even wider. “Then I’ll see you next week.”
@mishkatelwarriorgoddess @cjand10 @railmesebstan
#marvel#smut#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x curvy!reader#bucky barnes fanfic#series fanfic#chapter 1#touch starved
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Source: The Catholic Northwest Progress, 22 October 1920
Written by Rev. Albert Muntsch, S. J., for the Press Bulletin Service of the C. B. of the C. V. Catholic teachers are so often asked why the Church forbids the reading of Hugo’s “Notre Dame de Paris” (The Hunchback of Notre Dame), and of “Les Miserables” that it seems worth while to set forth briefly the reasons of this condemnation. Both works are explicitly condemned, the former in a decree of July 28, 1834, the latter in one of June 20, 1864. Popular opinion ranks both books among the outstanding productions of world-literature. Those who share this view are frequently unable to give any reasonable ground for their admiration. They have heard others speak in glowing terms of the romances and have never formed an opinion based on close reading. Unfortunately, many books which have no literary or artistic value whatever thus achieve a wide reputation which all the opposition of sound criticism cannot restrict to sober limits. [. . .] "Les Miserables," a social romance, begun in 1848, was finished in 1862, and is an indictment against the existing order of society. The work glorifies opposition to the established social order, and though some of the characters are inspired by high ideals, the tendency of the work, as a whole, is revolutionary and unsound. It may be called a great Socialistic epic. There are of course eloquent pages in the book, and the social evils so mercilessly exposed, unfortunately weigh heavily upon large sections of every community. But this does not justify the tenor of the development of the tale. There is not only no need to spread a sentimental halo around an unfortunate mother like Fantine, from whom the first part of the story is named, but it is ethically wrong to do so. A moral transgression is always deserving of censure, and the writer who uses his literary art to ennoble wrongdoing is an enemy to society. His book ought to be branded as evil. As an illustration of the method employed by Hugo to belittle, and even to calumniate, as much as lay in his power, a sacred institution of the Church, we mention the strange and shockingly grotesque picture of religious orders in Part 11, Book 7, of “Les Miserables.” We read: “From the point of view of history, of reason. and of truth, monachism (the religious life), is condemned. . . . Monasteries . . . are detestable in the nineteenth century." In the same paragraph it is said that Italy and Spain are beginning to recover from the curse of monasticism, “thanks to the sane and vigorous hygiene of 1789 (the French Revolution).” The long eulogy of the bishop in the opening chapters of the book make this distorted and calumnious sketch all the more abominable. For unthinking persons may be led to believe that Hugo writes as a loyal son of the Church. No matter how one regards “the Index of Forbidden Books” drawn up by the Church, an unbiased mind will recognize the wisdom of the precautionary measures taken by her to safeguard the spiritual interests of her children. That promiscuous reading of pernicious literature has caused untold harm, no one can deny. A large amount of the irreligiousness of the modern world and the general looseness of morals may be attributed to the vicious productions of the press. Just now the works of Blasco Ibanez are widely advertised “with a great noise of tomtoms and circus paradings,” as one critic has well expressed it. But works like “The Shadow of the Cathedral” sow the seeds of anarchy and discontent among unthinking classes. To banish them from our people, or at least to restrict the sphere of their civil influence, is not an offense against art, but a high form of social service.
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stromuprisahat:
Even of we look at it through era-appropriate lens- there's no GOOD memory. Sure, slap your kid a little- this is 19th-esque century- but screaming and punishments shouldn't be the ONLY thing they remember! How much more interesting could Alina's relationship with AK be, if she remembered switch AND warm hugs. It could be more complex, nuanced- loving "mother", still subjected to age-appropriate mentality and values! But no, we got Anne Cunt, Baghra 2.0...
Hello! I loved your post about Baghra and how she is a glorified egoist and super toxic!!!
I would like to know your opinion about Ana Kuya, the terrible woman who screwed and oppressed Alina when she was still a child!!!
⚠️TW!: Domestic violence and abuse!⚠️
Thanks, anon!
Apparently that's a similarity that they share, the Darkling and Alina. They both had shitty, abusive mothers. And in Ana Kuya's case it's pretty much the same. She was physically abusive and Alina and Mal remember her fondly. And that's the problem. Instead of having the characters admit that she was a horrible mother figure, we have them look back on her punishments as something...worth to be remembered fondly??
Let's dive in her most fucked-up moments.
Talking shit about the children she's assigned to look after. Alina and Mal both heard her but she's still an icon in their eyes! 😍
No 'cause imagine comparing your mother figure to some blood-thirsty creatures with sharp claws and teeth that live and thrive in darkness.
Uhh...
Excerpt No. 1, in which the protagonists talk about Ana Kuya's physically abusive behaviour.
A LETTER?!
Girl, if I were you I would say adiós and never look back. What letter are you talking about?? 😭
Ana Kuya being responsible of Alina's shame for wanting to get it on with a man. This woman and her morals are imprinted in her mind.
Imagine having to spend your last day with your love and choosing to talk about her. And the memory is again toxic 🥹
Other couples: "Let's talk about our happy memories"
Malina: "Let's talk about how our mother abused us"
They have literally zero good memories from her. Only shouting and beatings.
Now that's a woman to admire!!
Do you hear that Alina?? You must kiss their shoes otherwise you would be like that poor girl on the road! 😠
Excerpt No. 2, in which the protagonists talk about Ana Kuya's physically abusive behaviour.
Excerpt No. 3, in which the protagonists talk about Ana Kuya's physically abusive behaviour.
Excerpt No. 4, in which the protagonists talk about Ana Kuya's physically abusive behaviour.
If a child refuses to eat a food, beat it!
Aha! So she does acknowledge it, huh? But what does it matter? We forgive her in this house😍❤️
(also can we talk about how they wanted one of their friends to meet her? Like guys whyy??😭)
Thank the heavens actually.
In my opinion, children need mostly love and understanding. But they also need discipline, yes. But NOT through physical violence. NOT through constant screaming. This is wrong but it's very possible that in Ravka it's accepted and forgiven? Because I also remember reading somewhere that when Nikolai was a child and misbehaved, they were punishing his best friend physically (I haven't read the duology so please correct me if I'm wrong). So even the royal family found it normal.
But having the characters look back to it as something that was okay? And they adored her?
I'm sorry but I didn't shed one tear when she died. Botkin's death affected me more than hers ever did.
Alina when she died: "Oh my God!"
Me when she died: "Oh thank God!"
#Grishaverse#grishanalyticritical#Ana Kuya#Alina Starkov#S&B Before#S&B Chapter 1#S&B Chapter 14#S&B Chapter 21#S&B After#S&S Chapter 2#S&S Chapter 11#R&R Chapter 7#R&R Chapter 13#R&R Chapter 15#books#quotes#Leigh Bardugo
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Like This Forever | 0.1 | J. Seresin
masterlist | next chapter
You’re thinking of the past, right as the future is about to change forever.
Warnings: accidental pregnancy, childhood friends to lovers, country singer!Jake, smut, pining, blissful ignorance, other warnings to follow. wc: 3k (18+ minors do not interact)
A U G U S T 1 9 7 4 / F E B R U A R Y 1 9 9 1
Driftwood — small town southwestern Texas, situated in Lockheart County. Springs, stony hills, and steep canyons. It’s good land, occupying a tiny patch of earth in the middle of the Edwards Plateu. That’s what they all say: good land, good soil. Large acreages of wheat for miles around, grown annually for harvest and winter through spring livestock grazing. The remaining two-thirds of the region is rangeland devoted to cattle ranching. Ranches in this region often seem older than the landscape itself. Lockheart County’s livestock industry is nationally appreciated, it was, even back then. Ranches here are huge, they’ve been there for generations. The town of Driftwood, itself, sits in a valley. It holds on to the people who settle there just like it holds onto the weight of that thick, summer heat all through the day. So hot that even the trees bend and furl like they’re seeking shade too.
Back then, Driftwood was even smaller than it is now. Post Office, Church, two schools, a fleet of locally owned stores on Main Street and a few other buildings for the fathers who weren’t ranchers or ranch hands to work.
On that day in early August, most of Driftwood’s thousand person population were nestled amongst the pews of St. Augustine’s Church, just outside of town. It’s a mile and a half from Main Street, and a mile and a half from the furthest fence on the Seresin Ranch. Their house is a sprawling thing that Bill’s grandfather had built — they haven’t got that kind of money now, and they didn’t on that morning in August. They’ve got three boys, who were squirming around the front pew, melting into the aged wood below them in their smart white button ups. They’ve got another boy too, standing behind Pastor James, holding a processional candle.
Jake’s their youngest. He was nine back then. Small for his age, especially when you stood him next to his brothers and their broad shoulders and long legs. His hair was beyond blond, lightened from the sun. His cheeks dusted with brown freckles and his eyes always narrowed into a type of John Wayne kind of squint. Jake loved John Wayne back then. He loved the cowboys on his bed sheets, and the fact he could see the cattle from his bedroom window. All he wanted back then was a pistol on his hip and a one-way ticket to El Dorado.
Mary-Lynn Seresin grew up in Driftwood, just like her husband had. She had known Bill since she was a little girl, and she had always known that she would marry him one day. Her nails were polished pink that day, sitting pretty atop the procession card as she fans herself with it. Two pews behind, you could still see a droplet of sweat bead from her neat blonde hairline and trail into the collar of her blue polka-dotted Sunday dress.
On that particular Sunday, the fans had packed up and stopped working. So, all six hundred of you who could make it out to St. Augustine’s we’re trapped in there — not just with Pastor James’ storytelling, but with the thick heat pressing down on the entire valley feeling like it had all been shut in this one room with the rest of you.
At the front, Jake Seresin’s cheeks were red, his hair was beading with sweat and his scarecrow, twig-like arms were trembling around the cross. He struggled with its weight and you had watched his green eyes flash out towards the crowd, briefly landing on his mother. Mary-Lynn gave him a proud nod. Bill was staring at the stagnant ceiling fans above their heads. You, were staring right at Jake.
Eight years old yourself, just eight weeks younger than Jake is, you have known that little grass-stain your entire life. In fact, Mary-Lynn and your mother found out that they were expecting just days apart. They had been in the same high school grade as girls, had married men who were good friends, and back then your mother had worked in the town’s hair salon five days a week. They grew very close through their pregnancies. Your mother was the first one to send flowers when Mary-Lynn went into labour a month and a half early.
Jake’s John-Wayne-Squint deepened through the heavy air, watching you like you were both about to draw pistols and settle this like men — right in the middle of Pastor James’ final verse. Your pigtails and your white Sunday dress weren’t fooling him. His robes and the heavy cross in his hand weren’t fooling you. Clearly following his brother’s gaze, Daniel Seresin turns and peers at you over his shoulder. He’s the closest in age to Jake, but he’s still five years older. Thirteen then and too grown up for childish squabbles like those, he just turned back to the front and shook his head.
The first three of the Seresin boys were all born within three consecutive years. Matthew, Noah and Daniel. They’re each tall like their mother, blonde like her too, and have inherited their father’s linebacker shoulders. Noah was fourteen and about to be a freshman in high school. After he fixed the chain on your bike at the beginning of summer, you were full-blown head-over-heels in love with him back then. You thought you were anyway.
Jake, however, had been in your class since Kindergarten and you had been forced to share your toys with him for even longer than that.
His arms trembled before you and your mouth had twitched. Neither one of you was listening to the service. It was almost over. Just a few more minutes until Pastor James wrapped up and the people of Driftwood and poured out of this sauna and out into the dry, morning sun.
Quickly, you shot a look at your mother sitting at your side. She was listening intently, staring right ahead with her neatly steamed clothes and her hair-sprayed hair. You’ll always remember the heavy smell of her rose-scented perfume. Every time you inhale it, you’re sitting at the foot of her bed, watching her fix her face in her vanity. Then, you looked to your father on the other side of you. Exactly the same. Pleased, you turn your attention back to the youngest Seresin boy.
Scrunching your nose, you had sat forwards just slightly and stuck your tongue out at him. Quite the diss back then. Jake’s green eyes had widened, sweat beading down his back under his white shirt and his service robes.
Driftwood is a safe place. It’s a fantastic town to raise children. The schools aren’t overcrowded and cars don’t speed through the centre of town. Country roads are a different story. But no one bats an eyelid, especially not back then, when their children are out of sight.
Mary-Lynn was busily detailing the events of her dinner party that coming Saturday to a group of women that are invited. She’s quite the hostess still. Your mother stood amongst them. Neither one of them were concerned about where their children were in the slightest. Until, that is, the sounds of muffled screaming filled their ears. The mothers of Driftwood rush to the commotion in their kitten heels and pretty dresses. Your mother was the first around the corner. She would recognise the sound of her baby’s screaming anywhere. But you weren’t the one in trouble. As usual, you had been causing it.
Your white dress grass-stained and muddy, dirt under your fingernails and covering your formerly white, frilled socks. You were kneeling. You haven’t yet noticed the crowd of women rushing in your direction. You’ve got Mary-Lynn Seresin’s youngest son pressed into the dirt, kneeling on his back and twisting his arm uncomfortably behind him.
“Say Uncle!” You demanded.
“You’re so dead! Get off!” Jake struggled under you, screaming with all the force that his growing lungs would allow. His voice must have been audible across the entire valley with how he was hollering. Freckled cheek pressed into the dirt, his white shirt was destroyed and he was in the middle of ruining his shoes with how he was scrambling for purchase in the dried dirt.
Quickly, your mother had grabbed you under your arms and hauled you off of the boy, spinning you to face her.
“What do you think you’re doing young lady?”
“He started it! — He said my dress was ugly!”
“It is ugly, you look like a girl!” Jake huffed from behind you as he had stumbled onto his feet and taken a look down at his church clothes. Slowly, he had lifted his gaze to look at his mother. Sullen and worried looking, he began to pout. It wasn’t working. Mary-Lynn had raised three boys by then, she knew when they were trying to play innocent.
The thing about growing up so close together, is that approaching double digits was a confusing time. It was around that age that your mother began to put her foot down when it came to all of those tom-boy activities. Girls might roughhouse and come home with holes in their jeans and mud on their faces, but young ladies didn’t. The dress was her idea.
Jake’s comment had been passing, just a whisper as his family had headed into church ahead of yours, but he was right — you did look like a girl. Back then, that wasn’t a compliment coming from him. So, you had cornered him outside and pummeled him into the dirt. Fair is fair.
“Mary-Lynn, I am so sorry about her — send me the dry-cleaning bill. I’m sorry, we should go.” Your mother had sighed in a hurry, frowning down at your ruined clothes, then looking towards Jake’s. You’ll always remember the smile on Mary-Lynn’s face after. Not pity, because she knew you were in a lot of trouble for this. Just fondness. She had gently patted your mother’s forearm and shaken her head.
“Let’s finish our chat. They’re already filthy. Let them play.”
Looking up at her, you hadn’t understood why she was siding with you back then. You had just almost broken her son’s arm for sport. As you grew, Mary-Lynn Seresin was always on your side. In her kitten heels and dresses, she remembered being a dirt-covered little girl once too. No one was telling her son that it was time yet, to be a man. There’s no harm in letting you be young a little longer.
Your mother had looked uncertain, but people in Driftwood always looked to Mary-Lynn for advice. She had somehow managed to keep four boys in line perfectly, her parenting expertise was studied by those around her. Finally, she had given you a brief nod.
You remember spinning on the delicate almost-heel of your church shoes, rounding on Jake, ready to brawl. You have no clue where the stick came from, but he was armed when you had turned around — but Jake always fought fair. He tossed you a stick of your own and took aim. Green eyes narrowed, he was trying to look down his freckled nose at you, but you were taller then.
“She’s gonna marry that boy someday.” Mary-Lynn Seresin had huffed with a wistful smile, watching the mud-caked children tear off through the field once again. This time, with sticks in hands and violent intent plastered across their dirty faces.
You’re not eight anymore. Jake’s not nine. This time of the year, you both happen to be twenty-six. You aren’t trying to kill him with a stick anymore either. You’re sitting at your favourite bar in Driftwood — there are four now — watching your best friend up on stage. He’s always confident. He has been since he hit that growth spurt when he was twelve. Since then, Jake has been unstoppable. But on stage is when he really shines.
The Dark Star feels like an old bar. It’s packed every Friday night. It smells like malt and smoke and Jake’s been playing here every Saturday since he was seventeen. This is the last time that it will ever be like this, and you don’t even know it yet. Jake’s in the middle of an original. People around here know him, they know his music. They might not get all the words right, but he always gets people singing.
Jake isn’t small for his age now. He grew into his nose, and he inherited those big shoulders, his skin’s tanned from his days out at the ranch. He’s strong and funny and kind. Sometimes it catches you off guard, when you turn your head and find a man in place of the little boy you once knew.
You’re in a booth, talking numbers. It turns out that you had inherited your mother’s knack for business strategy, and Jake’s way with words had rubbed off on you long ago.
You don’t look like the little girl Jake had once known either. If he was concerned about you looking like a girl before, then you can only imagine how dismayed he must be when he looks at you now. Breasts and everything.
“It’s more than potential, Stu — you saw how crazy people were for him when he was opening for The Ashford Band.” You tell him, fingers curled around a brown glass bottle. This is already settled, the deal is already done. You knew from the second that he walked in that you had Stu Adler suckered.
This is a deal that you’ve been mulling over for a couple of months now. Getting Jake on his first headline tour. His debut album came out last week and it’s doing well, but the record label is tiny and the publicity deal is even smaller. Jake’s making pennies compared to other people in his genre, but you’re about to change all of that.
“Six months is a long time on the road. It’s a different lifestyle,” Stu’s dishwater grey eyes flicker briefly up from the plunging neckline of your top to meet your gaze. He’s an older man, with a once successful career in Los Angeles. Now, he spends his time scrounging small towns for talent. He’s just a stepping stone in your plans for Jake. “You’re sure he can handle it?”
Stretching your legs out, you scoff incredulously at the accusation as Jake’s last song dwindles behind you. The beer bottle is cool against your lips. Stu swallows, watching your lips purse around the rim to drink. You know he’d die for the chance to get his wrinkly, old dick in your mouth — it’s why Jake’s about to get the best deal of his life.
“Jake? — Of course.”
“Can you?” Stu asks. The light on you for once makes you cringe. Even so, your poker face doesn’t falter. Calmly staring across the table at him, a small smile on your face. “Y’know, he’s going to need a manager that I can rely on. I.e. — one that he won’t dump, sweetheart.”
This only makes your smile grow. “Jake is like a brother to me. You don’t have to worry about a thing.”
It’s that lie that secures the deal. Six months, a hundred and sixty dates across the US. Mostly small venues, but it’s his first headline tour — and it’s all because of you. Because of that one little white lie. Letting Stu think that he’s got a chance with you. Letting him think that you’ve never fucked Jake.
You have. Twice, already by this point. Once, after senior prom. Your date was an asshole and his was cruel. You’d parked his truck out in the west pasture of the Seresin ranch and got a little too drunk under the stars, and wound up with your legs hiked up over his shoulders. The second time was Thanksgiving two years ago. Your family joined his. All of his brothers have fiancés or wives now. Sharing Jake’s bed in his childhood home that night, neither one of you was drunk. You were just lonely, and maybe bored.
Tonight, there are a couple of different factors at play. Sure, by the time that you and Jake collapse down onto that red, velvet couch in the Dark Star’s ‘dressing room’, you’ve had plenty to drink. You’re not quite as lonely as you were that thanksgiving, though.
You turn your head and he’s grinning at the ceiling, chest heaving from the energetic final song. His arms stretch along the backs of the couch, his eyes closed for a moment. You watch him silently.
“You’re incredible.” Jake’s half-cut on an unhealthy mix of tequila and vodka, but smiling, eyes still shut, chin still pointed towards the sky. He gives his head a small shake. “A hundred and sixty dates.”
A smile plasters itself across your lips. As drunk as you are, it’s nice to be complimented for your hard work. “Yeah, we’ll see if you still think I’m so incredible when you’re living off of burgers and beer and still have eighty shows to go.”
The smell of cigarettes lives within the fibre of this room. Part of the furniture, nestled amongst the cracks in the red painted walls. There’s the couch that you’re sitting on, and an illuminated vanity against the far wall, and then a coat stand. It’s not much of a dressing room, but it’s fine.
You just wish it would stop spinning.
“I mean it.” His fingers rest atop your denim clad thigh, patting platonically. You hear him sigh from beside you. He squeezes at the supple skin under his hand. “Thank you.”
“Jake… since when do you have manners?” You ask him. Both of you are sitting with your eyes shut on this old, probably dirty, velvet couch. It’s five in the morning. The two of you might have gone a little overboard with celebrating. Wayne Mayhew, the owner of the Dark Star might have threatened to kick you both out of his bar if you didn’t finally get off of his damn stage ten minutes ago.
But there’s a high buzzing between the two of you that feels electric. Wordlessly, you know Jake feels it too. That this is the last night. Here, in this shitty hometown bar. Everything is about to change. After this tour, nothing will ever be the same again — for either of you.
Jake’s thumb trails back and forth in just one small pattern, reminding you that it’s there on your thigh.
It’s been on your mind all day, for no reason at all. That Sunday in August in 1974. Your ruined church dress and the fat bruise on Jake’s cheek the next day when you had seen him at the market. The start of it all.
Those late night drives and all the evenings you studied together. Jake’s football games and his band practices — back when he had thought he wanted to be in a band. Him drying your tears and making you laugh. Growing up together, talking for hours and hours about all of the possibilities. This was everything Jake had ever wanted, and he’s thanking you.
Your eyelids weigh double what they normally do — heavy as you blink open your eyes and turn your head. This time, he’s looking across at you. The tips of his fingers brush the inseam of your blue, low-rise jeans. His face is calm, he isn’t saying anything and he’s far from doing anything either.
Scrunching your nose, you poke your tongue out at him. Across the couch, Jake lifts his brows. The corner of his mouth twitches. He’s got stubble now. Stubble, and chest hair and an Adam’s apple. But that look, that glint in his eye that’s just daring you to try him has always been the same.
Jake’s fingers twitch, pressing into the soft flesh of your inner thigh. Dim lighting, fifteen year old red paint on each of the four walls, and that perpetual cigarette smell — it’s hardly a romantic fantasy. And this is far from a good idea.
But it’s Jake. Confident, loud Jake who gets shy when he’s around someone he really likes. Funny, smart-mouthed Jake who under it all is a great listener. Goofy, habitual Jake who has the nighttime routines of a fifty year old housewife.
Strong-willed, handsome, Jake, your best friend — who’s looking at you like you’re his next meal.
…
@fia-thefirst @daggerspare-standingby @dempy @v0id-chaos @moonlight-addisyn @grxcisxhy-wp @shakespeareanwannabe @coconut152 @330bpm-whiplash @takemetooneverlanddd @princess76179 @loveofvernonslife @averyhotchner @trickphotography2 @sushiwriterhere @the-romanian-is-bae @atarmychick007 @talktomegooseman @xoxabs88xox @thedroneranger @roostersforevergirl @buckysdollforlife @abaker74 @blackwidownat2814 @kmc1989 @whatislovevavy @lonelywriter10 @s-u-t @topguncortez @callsign-joyride @rosedurin @86laura11 @theenorthstar @mygyn @growup-thatbeautiful @percysaidnever @katiedid-3 @its-the-pilot
#jake smut#Jake Seresin#Jake Seresin x reader#Jake Seresin x you#jake seresin x y/n#Jake Seresin fic#jake seresin#Glen powell#Jake hangman Seresin#top gun: maverick
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Idk if my ask was sent but do you mean that Aleksander has his face tailored when he met Alina ? Which is probably not, but then why wouldn’t he ? Why did he choose to leave his ‘natural’ face ?
(x,x)
I don't think he did.
If there were such option, he'd use it.
Baghra taught him a new haircut and name make a new person, and at some point he'd ~need~ to become someone new. After the Fold at the latest. Although one could argue said hair and obligatory "family resemblance" should be able to cover it, since he goes with the father-son story.
He's the man, who gave up his personhood to focus only on his goals. He'd do anything to protect them. If he'd have a choice to ensure he won't be recognized as the same man as the "deceased" one, he'd take it.
The issue is the original concept of Tailoring. It used to be unique skill with results far from permanent:
“Are there other Tailors?” I asked. “Genya is unique,” he answered, glancing at me. “Like us.”
Shadow and Bone- Chapter 7
“Don’t get too excited,” Genya said. “It’s temporary.” ... “It only lasts a few days,” she informed me.
Shadow and Bone- Chapter 6
I don't think I have to delve into the impracticality of keeping another person around, so he can remain looking like "himself".
#reply#Grishaverse#The Darkling#Tailors#grishanalyticritical#S&B Chapter 7#S&B Chapter 6#books#quotes#Leigh Bardugo
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Chicory (c.b. one-shot)
Snippet (more BTC): He tugged you by your hand back to the bedroom, kissing you deeply tugging you close by your hips and his hands traveled down your back, over your ass, squeezing and you moaned a bit, cupping his jaw and rubbing your thumb gently over the stubble that had grown since he shaved in the shower yesterday morning. He hummed softly, carefully sitting on the mattress and leading you to straddle his hips, playing gently with the hem of your panties between his fingers.
♡ Chapter Inspo: Chicory is perfect for love spells, & sex magick, it is also a natural aphrodisiac - this being because it is a great source of the androgen hormone androstenedione. ♡ Summary: You wake up to find Carmy's dirty little book he's been hiding from you, and convince him you want to try some things out from it, too. ♡ W/C: 3.5K+ ♡ Posted Date: 05/28/2024 ♡ A/N: Hellooooo!!! Happy day 3/7 of the Capri 200 Follower Celebration Extravaganza!!! You can find said extravaganza ♡ Here ♡ this celebration will be going until next Sunday (06/02/24)! We're getting todays party started early because I am physically incapable of sleep today I guess!! Lol anywhore - This O/S is based on ♡ This ♡ request, from my Darling Dirty Olive Martini otherwise known as the goddess herself @carmenberzattosgf ! Give her a follow NEOWW!!! I hope you love my dear Martini baby! Your other request is still in the works xoxoxo ♡ Warnings for BTC: Smutty smut smut, embarrassed Carmy, unprotected sex, AFAB!Fem!Reader, Reader not described pic's are purely for vibes only, swearing, and typical TB trigger warnings
♡ 𝐌𝐲 𝐋𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐬 ♡
➵ 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 ♡ ➵ 𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐲 𝐨𝐧𝐞-𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐚𝐠𝐞 ♡ ➵ 𝘊𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘬 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 / 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘵 ♡ ➵ 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬 ♡
You and Carmy had been dating for about 2 months, and it was an extraordinary two months. While he wasn’t the best at communication, he tried, and he tried very hard. He was an amazing learner, and would pick up what you put down the second he realized he made a mistake - do his best to fix it, and not make the same mistake again. In regards to the bedroom, your pleasure came first, it was like that from the beginning. It wasn’t something either of you discussed, it was more that Carmy was the one who did the leading most the time, and you followed & told him what did and didn’t feel good.
Most of the time, he was dead set on solely your pleasure. You could remember the amount of times you’d had penetrative sex with him, as much as you hated that you kept track, it was just in your nature to do so. He hadn’t let you go down on him yet,saying that he was ‘all good by eating you out’. On top of your lack of experience together - he also liked to have the lights off most of the time. You were much more sex forward than he was, so you just chalked it up to being shy, and didn’t think anything of it.
That was until he was sleeping one night next to you, falling asleep after eating you out for a straight 2 hours, you couldn't even remember the exact number of times he made you cum. You also weren’t sure how his jaw didn’t lock up.
The reason you had woken up at such an hour, was because your hand brushed something hard and papery under his pillow when you stuck your hand under it in search of his to hold. You carefully pulled the foreign book out, and in the dim moonlight that peeked through his navy blue blackout curtains, you read ‘BDSM Kinktionary - The ultimate guide’ and oh - had that thing been read. The spine had been very broken in, it was clear this specific book of his was well loved.
You flick through it, to see that there were multiple pages that had been dog-eared for later use. You got up quietly as to not disturb him, padding out to the kitchen where he kept the light under his microwave on. Leaning over the counter and flicking through the pages, finding the first one that had been dogeared and reading it.
Bondage - The restraint of a person, either by physical item (cuffs, rope, etc.) or instruction (known as mental bondage). Restraint can be full-body (vacuum beds, suspension) or involve a single body part such as the eyes (blindfold), mouth (ball gag), wrists or even thumbs. Bondage may include furniture like sex swings and devices like handcuffs.
It had various photos of different things mentioned and you raised your brows. “Carmy have you been holding out on me?” you whispered to yourself, a small smile on your face as you flicked to the next page that had been marked by a fold and read ;
Cockwarming / Soaking - Where one person puts their cock into their partner’s mouth, ass, or vagina (if they have one), and leaves it there for a set amount of time to, well, ‘keep warm’. Some people use it as a punishment, some people just like the feeling of it, some use it as a more intimate & sexual form of spooning/cuddling, and some use it as a method of trying to conceive after a creampie (see pg. 32).
You see a little star next to the definition made with red ink likely from a pen, and the word ‘creampie’ was underlined as well. Your mouth dropping slightly - this is likely what he wants to try. When you and Carmy did have sex, he would usually cum on your stomach, long thick white ropes of seed painting all the way up to your ribs, dragging his fingers through it before putting it to your lips to which you gratefully accepted and licked them clean. You tightened your thighs a bit at the thought.
The bedroom door popped open quietly “Babe?” Carmy said, voice gravelly and deep with sleep. You jump in surprise, nearly hitting your head on the side of the microwave as you were bent over trying to read without your glasses in such dim light. “Wha’s up-” he asked padding over. He saw the cover on the counter behind you, eyes widening and eyes flicking back to you. His cheeks go pink “Uhh.. how- how did you - shit - fuck - m-m’sorry babe it was- I-” he ran a nervous hand through his hair taking a big nervous breath.
“Cockwarming?” you said and he rubbed over his mouth and chin nervously
“It’s - i-it’s- y’don’t have t’do any a’that babe it was just a um-”
“A fantasy?” you cut him off. He bit his bottom lip roughly, swallowing thickly. His whole face and neck were red with embarrassment, he looked honestly like he could cry. Like a teen who’s porno-mags had been discovered. “I think it sounds…really hot” you grabbed the book off the counter. “I know you don’t really like getting head so-”
“S’not that I don’t like it. I just…I haven’t done it alot an’I don’t wanna embarrass myself n’stuff.” he rubbed his arm nervously and you stepped a bit closer, gently resting your hand on his chest right over his heart. You could feel it thumping against your palm like a monarch trapped in a plastic cup.
“You can’t embarrass yourself with me Carmy, we talked about it. The way our bodies react to things- how fast they react, it’s not something we can choose. I’d never judge you, is that why you didn’t wanna tell me the stuff you want to try? Cause you thought I’d think it was embarrassing?” you asked him softly.
He looked at the floor, shutting his eyes and sighing “yes” he admitted quietly, “how much did you see?” he asked nervously
“Enough, I didn’t even know that was like a thing? But it sounds hot- can we try? I mean..we dont have to- but I could go right now, if you want to” you asked. He held his hand on yours, gently squeezing it.
“I’ve never done it-”
“So we can learn together then, right? Things are most fun that way, anyways. I love doing new things with you, Carmy. It makes me feel close to you” you admitted.
He pulled you into a hug, nuzzling his face in your neck and holding you close. “Thank you” he muttered into your skin, the tip of his nose chilly since you two had fallen asleep with the window open last night.
“F’what baby?” you asked, rubbing over his back, your finger pads gently brushing over the little moles adorning his skin like tiny constellations you traced over in early mornings just after his alarm went off and he was still rousing for the day.
“Bein’ you” he said and kissed the fleshy bit where your shoulder met your neck and a smile graced your lips, gently petting his hair “I wanna try if you wanna try…I mean really wanna try, not just ‘cause I wanna do it, cause you actually want to” he said.
You pulled away, tilting his head to look at you “I want to.” you said, your voice honeyed with honesty and desire.
He tugged you by your hand back to the bedroom, kissing you deeply tugging you close by your hips and his hands traveled down your back, over your ass, squeezing and you moaned a bit, cupping his jaw and rubbing your thumb gently over the stubble that had grown since he shaved in the shower yesterday morning. He hummed softly, carefully sitting on the mattress and leading you to straddle his hips, playing gently with the hem of your panties between his fingers.
You opened your mouth for him, gently sucking on his tongue when he slipped it in your mouth since you know how much you both liked it and he moaned softly, gripping your ass tighter and pulling at the skin. You smirked into the kiss, pulling off after a few moments with a pop
“Want y’to touch me” you said sweetly, gently kissing the corner of his slightly parted lips, his breath coming out in soft warm pants against your cheek.
“Mm” he hummed softly reaching one of his hands under you, gently rubbing at your clit “y’sore?” he asked softly “I wasn’t too rough earlier was I?” he questioned as you kissed down his jaw, and over the hickeys, you’d left a few days ago on his neck. He wasn’t too stressed about them because he would just tell anyone at work to fuck off and there wasn’t going to be another friends and family night for a few weeks.
“No love, m’okay, that was so nice earlier. Made me feel sooo good, Are you ok?” you gently stroke his jaw with your hand and he smiles a bit
“Yes babe, m’fine. Feel good?” he asked and rubbed a bit firmer, in response your hips jerked a bit in his hands and a little breathy oh escaped your throat
“Yes jus’ like that babe feels so good, I love your pretty strong hands” you lovingly kiss his temple, resting your forehead on his “I fuckin’ love it when you touch me like that, bear” you said and his cock twitches in his boxers beneath you, already hard in briefs. It never took him much, but especially when you used his name.
That name, his nickname. The name only the closest people in his life called him, the name that coming from you - made him feel confident, strong, dominant. “Can’t fuckin’ focus when y’bein so sweet baby c’mere” he pulls his lips to yours again, pushing your panties to the side, breaking the kiss of course to ask “thas’ok right?” carefully rubbing his fingers through your slick
“Mmhmm, Course sweet boy - Feel how wet I am? All f’you baby. Y’so sexy, and so brave for telling me what you want from me, hmm? My brave Bear” you gently play with his curls, combing through them with your fingers. He kissed you again, cock grinding up against your pelvis unintentionally. You knew how much praise turned him on, he yearned for it. He carefully pulled back your hood, brushing the rough pad his middle finger over the sensitive bud.
You whine into his mouth, hips jerking at the sudden, intense bolt of pleasure and in retaliation you took his bottom lip between your teeth and pull gently. Your eyes then fluttered open to see his hooded blue eyes darkened with need, long eyelashes fluttering his cheeks when he blinked.
You sucked his lip between yours, sucking gently on it as he carefully trailed his hand down your slick folds, spreading your nether lips with his fingers a sticky click being heard when that same torturous middle finger that was teasing your innocent clit a few moments prior, breached your dripping entrance. Your mouth falls open, letting his lip snap back into place and a moan tumbles from your own lips.
“Yes- fuck yes baby” you sat back a bit to take another knuckle in and he buried his finger to the palm, curling it and uncurling it around your gummy walls, a lewd wet schlick noise coming from your pussy as he did so
“Sound so pretty” he breathed arching his finger a bit deeper and brushing against that lovely spongey little spot that made your clit pulse and fire grow in the pit of your belly. “Want another princess?” He asked, and unable to speak, you nodded, jaw dropped. You grind down onto his hand once he added his ring finger, rolling your hips so you were essentially riding his hand as he continued rolling his fingers and pressing on that spot.
You were feeling that heat shooting to your core, your juices leaking down his palm, and wrist, droplets racing down his veiny forearm to nestle in the crook of his elbow. “Oh- oh-fffffuuuck” you whined out, rolling your hips quicker as you chased your high. “Mm so sweet - y’so sweet Carmy- letting me use your hand like this, thank you” you give him a hot, wet kiss, lingering for a moment.
“Lemme help you mm?” He pushed your back to lay over him fully, cheek pressed to his chest “I like takin’ care’a’my girl” he said and quickly matched your pace with his fingers, continuing to curl them into that spot with every thrust in to his palm. He groaned softly at the short high pitched little whimpers you made as you went slack over his chest, your hips twitching as your walls fluttered wildly around his fingers, sucking them back in each time he pulled out.
“Feels so good- sososo good” you rambled, nearly drooling on his chest you were so far away in your orgasm.
“Y’always do so good princess, always so good, can y’give me one more? Ye’? Then you can fall asleep on m’cock mm? You’d like that I bet, you always whine when I pull outta you” he said hotly in your ear, voice thick with lust and pure need. This was the game you two played, he would fuck you absolutely dumb, so that he got comfortable enough to talk dirty thinking you wouldn’t remember what he said or that you were too caught up in your own nearly atomic orgasms he was determined to lure out of you to be able to hear him properly.
“Need it- need it- want you-“ you choke on your words, hips arching into his touch as he continued his assault on your gspot, this time adding his forefinger. “There- there right fuckin there I’m- I’m gonna make a mess shit fuck-“ you sob out, thighs nearly shaking with pleasure. “Carmy Carmy- Carmy- oh!” His name fell from your lips like an invocation.
“Thas it pretty girl. Fuck- so fuckin hot- make a fuckin mess all over me angel.” He massaged that spot with his fingers, the heel of his palm giving delicious friction to your clit that was causing your brain and your mouth to disconnect, the string of lewd swears and filthy moans going unheard by you as you were pretty sure your vision went white behind your shut lids and your legs went fully numb for a moment.
You came back a few minutes later to him whispering praise into your hairline, littering little kisses over it and gently brushing your wet sweaty hair from your forehead. “So so good baby. Always so good f’me huh? Y’gonna let me take care’a’you now?”
You picked your cheek up from his chest, your skin sticking to his and pulling away like scotch tape, slow since you weren’t in a rush to move being so exhausted and very comfortable where you were. “Hey you, gonna lemme clean you up so we can try this thing out?” He carefully brushed your baby hairs from your face that were wild and curly with sweat from the encounter.
In response you hum softly, in agreement, throat feeling dry as you sat up to let him move. He carefully reached over you, opening his night drawer and grabbing the feminine wipes he kept in there for you, as well as grabbing your water bottle from the tabletop.
He holds the straw to your lips “big sip f’me, ye’?” He cradled the back of your head gently. You leaned in, taking the sip he requested, and as soon as the icy water he assured your cup stayed filled with passed your lips one sip turned in to a few big gulps, eyes shutting in bliss. “Goood girl.” He praised gently. Hearing the bubbles at the bottom a few moments later, meaning you’d hit ice and it was empty so you pulled away, your tongue darting out to lick your dry lips
“Thanks” you said softly and pecked his shoulder with your chilly ice water lips gently.
“You go do what you gotta do, I’m gonna fill this up mm?” He kissed your head and got up, heading to the kitchen. You went to the restroom, making sure to wash your hands which you know he did as well since you heard the kitchen sink while you were sitting on the toilet rubbing your tired face.
By the time you got back, he was already switching out the fitted sheet for a clean dry one, in clean boxers - his problem still evident, standing tall and tugging at the fitted fabric. “Carm” you said softly and he looked up at you
“Hey baby- y‘waters there got you a granola bar if you want it too. Wasn’t sure if y’just wanted to go to sleep but i'd love if you had a bite or two-
” he goes on. The only time you had a hard time getting him to stop talking was when he felt as if you needed taking care of, turning into the male version of his sister, as you’d quickly found out how she treated him the few times you’d met her.
“Carmy” you said again, stopping his rambling. “What about the book- the cockwarming thing? Did you…you don’t wanna do that with me anymore?” You slipped out of your now wet panties and flicked them into the laundry basket.
“Oh- oh-“ he watched them fly and land on your shared pile of dirty clothes from the week of you sleeping over. “Uh- no- I-I mean yes yes I wanna do it with you, I can um…let me get a condom just in case I like- accidentally-“ you stopped him once more
“If you came inside me on accident I think that would be really hot.”
He stopped digging through the drawer and looked over at you, cheeks flush. “Did you…take your thing?” He asked, like it was a secret. You laughed a bit at his boyish awkwardness regarding woman’s products.
“I don’t take a thing the thing meaning my implant is in my arm. I’m never at risk with it for pregnancy, well - shouldn’t be - but it’s like a 98% thing…I also am pretty irregular? So I dunno” you shrugged a bit “but irregular means I probably won’t be pregnant, especially on birth control, so.” You explained.
“Okay- um- yeah. Yeah.” He said, pulsepoint visible in his neck from how hard his heart was pumping in anticipation for what was to come next. “So- alright. You- you wanna be on top? I- I don’t wanna like..crush you” he said and you nod excitedly
“I love sleeping on you! I’m gonna fall asleep, is that ok?” You asked as he slipped his boxers off, cock kissing his naval in greeting as it springs up from its previous restraints. The tip was so pretty and cherry pink, glistening with precum at the tip. Every time you saw it like this you just wanted to fall to your knees and take as much of the beautiful thick length down your throat as you could - but that was a line to still not be crossed by you two.
“Ye’ s’fine baby. As long as y’re ok w’me wakin’ up hard as fuck I’m probably gonna dream about fuckin you feelin you like that all night” he admits, laying in the middle since you were sleeping together and getting comfortable for you. You crawled on the bed and took his shirt that you’d been wearing fully off so you could be chest to chest, and drape over him like earlier.
This time, he spread you out with his hands, one on each cheek and guided your hips so his tip was nestled snugly against your entrance. “I’m okay as long as you’re okay” you said truthfully and sunk back on his throbbing cock. He grunted a bit, biting his lip and shutting his eyes for a moment. You knew he did that now when he didn’t want to cum too quickly, just from being with him a few times, you picked up on stuff like that just like he did.
“Y’so fuckin tight” he breathed once he was able to relax again, wrapping his strong arms around your back and you thought he was going to push you down, seat you fully on his cock - but, no he…he’s hugging you. He’s continuing to let you sink down as slow as you want. When you finally were seated to the hilt, he places a chaste kiss to your jaw. “Thank you.” He nuzzled his nose into your neck, lashes kissing and tickling your cheek as his eyes flutter shut.
“Thank you Bear. Always treat me so nice” you continued gently playing with his curls as his hands gently rubbed over your upper back, tracing the curvature of your shoulders with his fingers.
“Oh I’d say it’s the other way around princess, you always make sure I get what I want - y’too good”
To that, you just smiled, falling asleep a tiny smirk on your face - knowing it was the other way around, you knew he’d never agree.
But you both wouldn’t have it any other way.
#Capri 200 follower celebration#carmen berzatto#carmen berzatto imagine#carmen berzatto blurb#carmen berzatto fluff#carmen berzatto smut#carmen berzatto x reader#carmen berzatto x you#carmy berzatto#carmen berzatto x female reader#carmy berzatto fic#carmy berzatto imagine#carmy berzatto smut#carmy berzatto x reader#carmy berzatto x female reader#carmy berzatto x you#carmy berzatto x oc#carmy the bear#the bear fx#the bear#the bear fic#the bear hulu#the bear fanfiction#carmen berzatto fanfiction#carmy berzatto fanfiction#the bear x reader#the bear x you
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HIIIII! I would like to first thank you for all that you do, looking through your blog has really helped me with my writing! It’s been very helpful for me to get rid of overused tropes and correctly write my guys!
Okay so here’s my question, and it’s not about how to write, but rather should I write— I am currently writing a story where most of my main characters have a disability. Now, I’m not (physically) disabled, and of course I’m doing my research on everything, but I’m not sure if I should be writing this. My goal for the message is “hey these people are just like you! They have some differences, but it doesn’t really matter! What matters is that they can still be your friend!” (It’s supposed to be an elementary-level story)
Thank you so much for taking time out of your day to read and answer this!
Hello lovely asker!
I think that more kids books about or with disabled characters is always good! There is such a big range in that elementary reading zone to explore in too!
Most kids start off elementary from reading those cardboard books with only a few pages, a few words, mostly pictures; and then by the time they're leaving elementary they're reading medium to large chapter books. The concepts of the books also change from simple stories that have a clear point of cause/effect, problem solving, or educational stance; and then as the books start to get longer the stories and characters become more complex and the type of stories change.
So for early elementary level story I would recommend looking up other books like
What happened to you by James Catchpole and Karen George
Just Ask by Sonia Sotomayor
ABC's of inclusion by Beth Leipholtz
Included by Jayneen Sanders
The last three take on a more educational stance while the first one takes on a more realistic view of how disability works in a kids eye. Here you're not developing the characters much but more using the characters as your point of learning and showing and recognizing.
For mid-elementary level these are longer books with a few chapters in it, maybe a few pictures here and there. The plot starts to become more complex, while still maintaining that explanation of "Here is what's going on". I think this is what you're going for here? There is still that point of learning (that "hey look they can be your friends" sentiment still carries into these books too). In all honestly I cannot think or find any books that fit here with disabled characters in it so for best reference the Junie B Jones books are this sorta level! Cam Jansen series, magic treehouse series, all of those books that are an introduction to chapter books.
Later elementary leveled books are chapter books like the Percy Jackson series, and now the plot is complex, there are more elements of the story to follow. All of these books follow a character with a disability but there's also another big event that they're navigating now.
Counting By 7's
Roll with it/time to roll
Show me a Sign
Song For A Whale
Insignificant Events in the life of a cactus
This level also tends to overlap with books for teens/young adults and so books like
The fault in our stars
Turtles all the way down
Me earl and the dying girl
Shadow and Bone (Series)
All of these books are lengthier, the characters are completely developed, and now the message is different. Now what these books do is drop the main focus on the characters disability and Instead focus on also the plot. The learning element that we see in earlier elementary books is kinda removed because now there is a whole story going on but that doesn't mean these characters are any less disabled, they still are but now they're going on adventures, solving mysteries, or falling in love.
I rambled a bit but hopefully something here helps and good luck on the writing!
~ Mod Virus 🌸
Hello!
Just popping in with a few of my own recommendations for middle/high school level:
A Step Toward Falling by Cammie McGovern
Written in alternating POVs, one is from the POV of a character with an unspecified developmental disability. Also includes several other disabled characters such as a blind autistic character. In this book, disability is a/the main part of the book.
Blind Spot by Laura Ellen
I can't recall the POV as it's been a while but the main character is blind (From macular degeneration) and the author also has the same condition. There are also several characters with other conditions including addictions. In this book, disability is a/the main part of the book.
Dear Mothman by Robin Gow
Written in the POV of a medium support needs autistic character. Also involves several LGBT characters. In this book, disability is a smaller part of the book.
Jerk, California by Jonathan Friesen
Written in the POV of a character with Tourette's Syndrome, by an author who also has Tourette's. In this book, disability is a/the main part of the book.
Love and First Sight by Josh Sundquist
Written in the POV of a blind character. There is also a character with a facial difference here. There are several tropes here that bother me a bit but I feel that they weren't done too badly. In this book, disability is a/the main part of the book.
Planet Earth is Blue by Nicole Panteleakos
Written in the POV of a high support needs autistic character. In this book, disability is a notable part of the book but not the main one.
Song for a Whale by Lynne Kelly
Written from the POV of a Deaf girl. It also includes several other Deaf characters, both in the main focus and in the background. In this book, being Deaf is a/the main part of the book.
100 Days by Nicole McInnes
Written in alternating POVs, one of which belongs to a character with progeria. In this book, disability is a smaller part of the book.
100 Sideways Miles by Andrew Smith
Written in the POV of a character with Epilepsy. In this book, disability is a notable part of the book but not the main one.
In terms of books for young children, I personally LOVED the We Are Powerful series, which are small picture books with a more educational style to them. Each book features a child with a disability and talks about their experiences with it, highlighting both the areas where they struggle and the areas where their disability makes them unique.
They aren't perfect, of course, but as a young kid who was just starting to figure out that I was different from everyone around me, they helped me a lot. There are several books in the series that focus on autism, ADD, ADHD, Tourette's, OCD, depression, dyslexia, and several other conditions.
Cheers,
~ Mod Icarus
#mod virus#mod icarus#theonewithallthefixations#disability in media#disability in books#recommendations
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pretty minor thing to think about, but i find it interesting how chapter 7 is the first chapter illustration to show chizuutan as chizuru (instead of chuutan)
like, i get it’s a flashback chapter, but we hardly got to see her as chizuru in the previous few chapters thus far… maybe we’ll get to see more of her as her true self after the hiyori fight/make up? only future chapters may tell, i guess…
#there’s like 5 weeks to go till chapter 6 is released into the rest of the world and i m n o t r e a d y—#man. chapter 5 still manages to ruin my mood no matter how many times i read it… man.#i was having so much fun with renren and concon and the 3 stooges and th e n.#imagine putting on a (somewhat) perfect/cute act to hide your true self because you know you’re unlovable the way you are#but then someone else runs along and screws up every step of the way without putting on any airs and is adored for it anyway…#i imagine chapter 6 will be much worse. especially since the start of the flashback begins there…#i sincerely hope the flashback ends in chapter 7 bc aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#though. considering where we are now in the series. i think there’s a chance that vol 2 will come out at the end of december#ch 8 will prolly start to drop somewhere around the later half of november so it seems about right…#b u t if there’s the preorder bonus manga for vol 2 in dec can we have santa girl chuutan in it p l s—#i think we’ll need an incredibly cute bonus feature to lift the mood from whatever the heck’s going on with vol 2’s chapters#bc. idk. im sensing some self hatred with this one chizuchan… it’s as though she can only love herself if she’s dolled up as chuutan…#like. even in her aizo self-insert delusions she’s thinking of herself as chuutan… maybe im reading too much into this. hm.#but then again she even puts on makeup when she’s at home in her own room…#w a i t a sec what if this wack behaviour only came about bc of what’s about to be revealed in the flashbacks. wait. no. w h a t if—#i hope manga chizuchan will be able to love herself properly soon… we all love you chizuchan~~~~~~~~~~#this. too. is our oshi no—#dammit why is something set in the same universe as the [redacted] anime making me feel things??? i hate itttttttttt#anyways. wh. what if one of the h10w turns out to be an anime adaptation of the chizuchan manga#and they’re just waiting on. like. the final vol to announce it.#it’d make the most sense for an anime series at this point… since chizuchan is marketable and it’s set in the same anime verse#so there’s no inconsistencies to retcon and such…#but!!!! most importantly!!!!!! we’d be able to see animated renren and concon!!!!!!!#…but something like this will only appear in my delusions huh~~~~~~~~~~~~~~#mousou dake no kawaikute gomen anime#ok that’s enough thinking for the day; back to kimikawaii mv g o o d b y e~~~~#chizuutan chizpost
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✧.* grow as we go; smau masterlist
synopsis: over the past ten years you've fallen in love many times. one day someone happens to stumble across your journal sitting out on your nightstand and started posting your entries online. after all of your secrets are leaked it's clear things would ever be the same again.
𐦍 paring: svt members x afab! reader.
𐦍 feat: non-idol! svt, (g)-idle minnie&soyeon, oc's
𐦍 genre/s: reader is super angsty low-key, fluffy, sexual themes.
𐦍 content: swearing, bullying, crazy ex's, mentions of sexual relations, some drinking& mary jane 🍃
𐦍 start date: october 2nd 2023
𐦍 updates: mainly mondays or thursdays.
𐦍 tag list - open
𐦍 note/s: a lot of what will be written is mainly as journal entries from the readers perspective!! in the beginning every other chapter or so will have a written entry. I'm mainly using ulzzang pictures for our main character. I'll be posting the profiles and introduction sometime tomorrow probably. the girlies love indie musicians & harry styles,srry.. I hope u enjoy, hehe. ily!
𐦍 chapters under the cut.
𐦍 profiles:
001 | 002 | 003
𐦍 journal entries:
part one;
00. introduction.
#1. super sleuths.
#2. the case of the cyberbullies.
#3. two robots fell in love.
#4 the fall of the empire.
#4.5 plan b?
#5. chronic memory keeper.
#6. quit!
#7 snake in the grass.
#8 not the bath mat.
#9 seeing red
#10 nerd heard?
#11 devil in disguise.
#12 stolen heart.
#13 gut feelings and emotional dealings.
#14 dressing for revenge.
#15 leave it to the cullens. (part 1)
#15 leave it to the cullens. (part 2)
#16 the part we play.
#17 happy trails
#18 damage control.
#19 anywhere you go.
#20 lost and found.
#21 we're so back.
#22 end it all.
#23 signing off for now.
#24 epilogue.
part 2; (coming soon)
#❃ - duffytalks#seventeen fluff#seventeen headcanons#seventeen scenarios#seventeen x reader#svt fic#svt reactions#svt texts#seventeen imagines#svt imagines#seventeen fic#seventeen smau#svt smau#svt social media au#seventeen soulmate au#seventeen social media au#seventeen soft hours#svt fanfic#svt x reader#svt fluff#seventeen x oc#seventeen x y/n#seventeen x you#svt x y/n#svt x you#svt x oc#seventeen fake texts#minghao x reader#mingyu x reader#joshua x reader
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