#Quora answer

[isawthismeme]

She’s brown and a democrat, gotta get that birth certificate, that we’ll call fake news anyway. Apparently, if you can’t win in a fight, you gotta at least try to get your opponent disqualified.

Sad and weird.

[socialistexan]

Rare Quora W

[perplexingly]

No, I think if someone makes fun of your looks it should be considered morally correct to summon bears to devour them

[insomniac-arrest]

If Reddit goes quiet, how're we going to find answers from real people anymore?? Most search engines are unusable due to SEO grifts. Quora is an annoying hellscape with a distracting layout. Yahoo Answers, Yahoo Answers . . . *starts weeping openly on her grave*

Humanity has been removed from our virtual human playground.

[earlgreyscentedgarbage]

i like the sense of you and maybe you like me, too

lyrics from Blue Motorbike by Moto Boy

[monstermoviedean]

"arent u tired. don't u just wanna go ape shitt" -thing i say to myself every single day of my life

[taniushka12]

Never associate characters & their relationships to celestial bodies bc you'll literally go insane both with the beauty of the cosmos and also the blorbos

[thebetterreigen]

As a lawyer, what advice do you have for someone considering the law field?

..and, my boyfriend wants me to add, how accurate is the videogame Ace Attorney to actually being a lawyer?

- @psychicflavouredritzcracker (I’m the brother to one of your conman brother’s ‘pupils’. I saw through him since day one, though.)

Hey there Mr. Future Lawyer. You've asked the right person. Also why does my brother seem to know so many teens?

Naturally one would assume being a successful lawyer requires good grades or reputable relationships with your tutors, and as much as it's true that there's a lot of theoretical material (court etiquette and procedures and the like—in my city we have uniform trial court rules and rules of civil procedure; I keep a copy of them, and you should do so as well for your local rules) none of that would matter because that's not what makes up a good lawyer. Learning the theory only becomes helpful 20% of the time on field—or I suppose, in court—the other 80% is learning the practicality of things.

And that leads to: gaining people skills. This. Is. Essential. Learn to listen. Try not to overtake the conversations. Interject only when necessary. Too often, we’re programmed to get to the bottom of something quickly and efficiently. You can wind up turning off a client or missing something important by being impatient. There's a lot of skills you need to develop—reading people, digging into their intentions, knowing what to ask and say and how to say them to get what you need—and that's not something you can learn by reading a textbook. Seeing through my brother was a first step, wink wink.

Another thing. If you're in it for the money, then don't bother. Do it for the people. Clients come to you for a reason.

...And Ace Attorney (outside of the magic and spiritual mediums used in the game) is a horrendously and agregriously inaccurate depiction of court proceedings. It may follow Japan's court systems but even then some of it is just downright wrong. I'll save that rant for another time, though, for your sake.

[accessible-tumbling]

Video description: The Quora site is displayed and the narrator, who has a British accent and is speaking quickly and excitedly, opens by reading from it: "My MacBook Air weighs 2.3 pounds. If I download more files on it, will it make it heavier?

"This is Quora," he continues. "A place where once grand intellectual questions would be mused over. But if you recall, 2 years ago we sadly bid farewell to our friend, Yahoo Answers, a place where those sorts of questions didn't happen, and in that time it seems many Yahoo users have made Quora their new home.

"Do chimpanzees get pregnant? Does anyone live on the sun? How high do planes fly when landing? What percentage of people are going to die? Do lesbians get periods?"

(A response to that question is read in a gruff tone:) "Oh, come on! Where the hell are you getting that question?"

"You are sleeping with your partner and suddenly realize that he/she is a ghost. What would you do? Are there werewolves in Texas? Why does the sausage have two ends? What happens to the time it takes to actually time travel into the past/future? Which hole does an actress push out a baby in a birth sense?"

(Another answer is read:) "She doesn't. She acts."

"I heard that in the Middle Ages, nobles used to wipe their butts with ducklings. Is that right?"

(Response, gruffly:) "No!"

"Is it true that pregnant women should not sleep during a lunar or solar eclipse as it may cause harm to the unborn?"

(Response:) "No. That's the dumbest thing I ever heard."

"Can I sue Germany for putting my grandfather in prison for 7 years in the second world war?"

(Response:) "No, no, no, no, no!"

"Can you think of a sentence that contains the words 'book' and 'crabs'?"

(Response:) "Well, yes, I can."

"Why does the 'bros' abbreviation for 'brothers' end in 's' instead of 'th'?"

(Response:) "Because that would spell 'broth'."

"Do rich people get embarrassed that their servants know what their stuff in the toilet looks like?"

(Response:) "This is a very weird question."

"What happens when we wash vessel and use it with water in which a lizard was dead? Is it poisonous? What can we do?"

(Response:) "Uhh..."

"Why does the United States promote homosexuality and not consider what happened in the petrified village of Pompeii?"

(Response:) "Wha…?"

"How can I have sex with Asia?"

(Response:) "Pretty sure you mean an Asian girl."

"Is Israel on the world map? Are the Irish really from Ireland? My son speaks Arabic. (in a panicked, shouting tone:) What do I do? Does India have airports?"

(Response:) "Putin came to India in 2014 swimming in the ocean. I have a photo to prove." (A flash of a picture of Putin swimming can be seen briefly at this point in the video.)

"Where do animals live? Why are things? What is my date of birth? Do you know a microscope? Real mathematicians (in all caps): I have 5 live cows and then I multiply them by 0. How then do you come and tell me that I end up with 0? Where did the 5 go? Which is larger: 0 or 2+7? Math math what is angle?

(Narrator comment: "I do believe this Quora user was intending to ask 'what are the names of the most powerful angels?' but…) What are the names of moist powerful angles? I'm an atheist who believes in God. What should I do? Why do atheists watch fiction movies? During airplane turbulence, how do atheists keep calm?"

(Narrator comment: "This question I could only find an old link for, even Quora went nowhere, not even, that is way too stupid:) How do atheists know what foods are 'sweet' versus 'sour' or 'bitter'?

"I am 11 and stand at 5 foot 2. Am I obese? Do celebrities fart? What's the meaning of a single white egg left at my door? (narrator's comment: that is weird.)

"My mom slapped her own bum in front of me what does that mean? Is this correct, 'similarvgbhujkljhgtyhujk'? Why is Zelda so 'thicc' in Breath of the Wild? Do demons always say 'I am a demon' when they are introduced? Is it possible to balance your entire body on your penis?"

(Response:) " Yes, but I'm scared of heights."

"I saw the cop the gay eating a raw bird in my backyard. What should I do?" (Narrator comment: "I became a bit obsessed with this question, it's so indecipherable and googled it for clues to find apparently there was much debate on the site about whether this was a weird autocorrect from 'cat'. Which word was supposed to be cat?")

"Can deaf people laugh out loud? Can deaf people do surfing? How do def people know what facial expressions look like and how they're used outside of American Sign Language (ASL)? If so, how do they learn about them if there's no way to see someone else make that face?" (Narrator comment: "I mean, I don't think there's any intelligent questions actually left on this site, is there? Who's asking 'Can music cause candle to light?' Obviously, no!")

"Do people still eat mashed potatoes? (Yes!) Can semen travel up your foot? (No,, it cannot.) Is the word 'stay asleep' alwasy spelled 'J'? (I don't even know what that means.) Do lobsters pee from their faces? (Uh, ugh, are you mad? Obviously no!)"

(Response:) "Yes, as others have pointed out, many crustaceans have two different types of excretory organs, both near the head. Usually only one is used, depending on the age of the animal. Lobsters and crabs, etc, use their urine smell like cats, to mark territory, warn rivals, etc." (Uh..oh.)"

The screen goes white and the scene transitions to footage of the narrator walking up to a door. He places an egg on the mat, then runs away.

End video description.

[isawthismeme]

[033h]

I can’t help but love men who dress well however I fear this will always be my greatest downfall. Need a guy who dresses like shit next probably.

[mooshroomsys]

QUORA IS CRAZY WHERE DID THIS COME FROM--WHOS HAVIN TROUBLE TELLING BETWEEN THE TWO 😭

-Monet

[mapsofnonexistentplacesremade]

[doing-something-unholy]

First of all,, in what scenario do you *desperately* need holy water??

And second, baptism = ordination speedrun any% is a hot take i think 🤔

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

Question found on Quora:

Have the non-believers ever thought about what will happen to them if they find everything is true what is mentioned in the Quran after they die?

So I’m going to be blunt here, but the sheer quantity of these questions have finally driven me to irreverence.

Non-believers spend a lot of our lives being bombarded by not just your religion, but the religions of every brainwashed nut-job in a thirty mile radius.

I’ve actually considered wearing a cross around town at times, just to stave it all off. You can only politely shove so many badly-written illustrated pamphlets in the recycle bin before it gets full. Besides, they’ve started coming to my door now, leaving behind creepy images of smiling families walking into what I can only assume is the Morlock slaughter-house.

And know what? All of you disagree about what I need to do to evade eternal damnation. The Seventh Day Adventists think I need to renounce all my friends and be creepy. The Baptists seem to think it’s mostly about not being gay. The Mormons want me to marry my dead relatives to each other, the Christian Scientists want me to renounce modern medicine, and for some reason the Scientologists think that measuring the voltage of the electrical current running over my skin at any given time tells me how many evil aliens I’m harboring or some such shit.

Your particular faith wants me to do yoga five times a day. Once a day is plenty, thank you very much.

In spite of this, you all agree on one thing:

I need to give you money and time, for free.

So no. No, I don’t spend any time at all wondering if the Giant Spaghetti Monster is going to deny me my meatballs in the afterlife.

Life is much too short and much too valuable to waste it worrying about whose favorite spirit animal is going to torture me once I’m dead.

If your particular made-up superhero turns out to be real, then the first thing I’m going to do when I die is tell him his information distribution system sucks more miniature balls than a hoover commercial and he should really look into fixing that.

I’m not holding my breath.

-- George Huestis

[ari-shipping-stuff]

damn idk can i 🤔