#and it makes me lose a bit of my sanity every single time

[taniushka12]

Never associate characters & their relationships to celestial bodies bc you'll literally go insane both with the beauty of the cosmos and also the blorbos

[descendant-of-truth]

Shipping is fun and all but I swear every single time someone makes a comment, whether as a joke or in a legitimate analysis, about there being "no other explanation" for a pair's interactions, I lose just a bit more of my sanity

Like, no, you guys don't get it. Romance is not about the Amount of devotion, it's about the COLOR. the FLAVOR of it all. a character can be just as devoted to their platonic friend as they are to their romantic partner, and they don't love either of them more, just differently.

But because the majority of people still have it stuck in their minds that romance exists on the highest tier of love, I'm stuck seeing endless takes that boil down to "these two care about each other too much for it to NOT be romantic" as if that's the core determining factor to how literally any of this works

In conclusion: stop telling me that I don't understand the story if I don't interpret the leads as romantic, I am TIRED

[astralis-ortus]

thunders of rage

✱ boyfriend!bc x gn!reader

— even through the worst days, you're still my priority.

w.count → 1.1k genre → fluff, comfort warning → mild cussing, reader had a bad day and lashes out at chan :(, one time jump, kissies, chan referred to as chris, reader referred to as baby and babe a.n → based on this request! tysm for requesting♡ ⋆ see masterlist

the word terrible doesn’t even cover the magnitude of bad luck you’ve been facing for the past 10 hours.

from waking up late for work, buses not operating due to a strike and causing the subway being jam-packed, getting absolutely roasted by your supervisor for someone else’s mishap, having your work ruined by a coworker, to barely surviving the somehow never-ending rush hour while running only on a single piece of toast you had in the morning—you’re absolutely in no condition to socialize, even for the slightest bit.

“hey, babe,” your boyfriend’s cheery voice was the first thing you heard as soon as you stepped inside your shared apartment. noises coming out from the speaker on your living room were the thing you noticed next—and you swear you’re so close to losing your sanity.

“how was your day? i saw you barely ate your breakfast when i got back from the gym. are you okay?” oblivious to your nonexistent reply, chris had his eyes glued to the game while he continued to talk. “i haven’t decided what to make for dinner, by the way. do you—”

“can you decide that on your own?” you finally cut your boyfriend off, tone of your voice catching chris off guard. you’re not one to speak sharply—you know it might offend the other party even when you didn’t mean to, and chris knew that about you.

so when he heard that tone being used against him, chris knew something is absolutely wrong.

“let’s get ice cream, then?” chris immediately paused his game and shifted his focus onto you. he sees it now—the seemingly permanent subtle frown on your forehead, the nonexistent glint on the reflection of your eyes, the messy bun on top of your head.

something stresses you out. bad.

“sure.”

chris watched your exhausted trudge head towards the kitchen and grab a glass of water, contemplating the best course of action to get grumpy you to cheer up even just for a little. “and some pizza? or some dimsum? while we wait i’ll run a bath—”

“goddammit, chris!” the loud sound of cup slamming on the countertop startled chris out of his sentence, eyes wide when confusion, irritation, and hurt started to mix in his chest. “i just told you to decide it on your own! stop bothering me! do i need to make every decision for you? god!”

the room fell silent as chris tried to digest the words you aimed at him—but it felt like his head was on static. it only took him a second to get up and grab a hoodie, suppressing any reaction his instinct was telling him to do before he said something he would regret.

“i’m gonna go cool off,” chris quietly said as he headed towards the door, momentarily stopping to look at your tense back. he desperately wanted to stay—but he knows you needed time to be on your own.

“you should cool off too.”

and with that, chris left.

it’s been nearly two hours since chris left, and after a cup of warm tea and a long bath later, guilt finally caught you up in its tight grip.

you knew what you did towards chris was wrong—chris was simply trying to make sure he’s getting something you like because he knows only then your mood would seem to improve, but instead, all you did was accuse him of trying to bother you.

thoughts ran through your head while you stare at your boyfriend’s phone number, thumb hovering over the green button as you try to piece an apology in your head. you’re genuinely worried—it’s getting later in the night, and you still haven’t heard even a single peep from chris. you can’t help but feel worried.

but just as you were about to press the call button, your ears finally picked up the sound of your front door cracking open—chris is home.

“baby, i’m ho—”

chris stopped in his tracks as he felt warmth suddenly enveloping him—you’re hugging him tight, face buried on the span of his chest.

“i’m sorry,” you quickly whispered, barely allowing him time to process what happened within the span of 5 seconds. “i was wrong. i shouldn’t have acted like that. i just really had a terrible day, and—”

“hey, hey, hey,” chris couldn’t help but chuckle, finally wrapping his arm around you after he finally set down the plastic bags on the countertop nearby. “breathe, baby. slow down. you’re okay.”

peering up at chris, your guilt only seemed to dig its claws deeper when you saw his dimpled smile, beautiful eyes gazing right at you even after the sharp words you threw at him.

you felt like crap.

“i’m really sorry,” you croaked another apology, now near tears with the tip of your lips turned down. “i really acted like an ass back there but you still became the bigger person between us. i would’ve understood if you shouted at me, but—”

“baby,” chris shook his head as he gently cradled your face, pads of his thumbs running softly against your cheeks, “i would never forgive myself if i ever raised my voice at you, even during a fight. you’re my girlfriend—you’re someone i need to protect, and that’s what i’ll always try to do.”

the way chris loves you never fails to render you speechless.

some might say you’re the bigger romantic between the two of you—date plans, endless whispers of ‘i love you’s, constantly wrapping yourself around his arm. it’s all what people would see; but you know the nights chris would pull you closer when he notices your tossing and turning, allowing you to settle to the rhythm of his heartbeat. you know the days when he would buy you a single stem of the prettiest sunflower or the loveliest bloom of rose, all because you said you’ve always liked flowers but never the huge bouquet. you know how he would always walk on the side nearest to the road, and the way his arm never left the curve of your waist.

you know the subtle ways he remembers—his ways of saying i love you, and you would never change that for anything in the world.

“kiss me.”

a chuckle rumbles in chris’ chest to your request, beautiful twinkle in his eyes turning you warm and fuzzy. he then gently tipped your chin, whispering a soft ‘i love you’ as he brought his lips onto yours, relishing in the way swarms of butterflies burst under your feverish skin.

©️ astralisortus, 2024. | likes and reblogs are highly appreciated♡

[palmettoshenanigans]

I fucking- I can't find it right now, but whichever one of you motherfuckers said Andrew's 'lack of control' was actually just intentionally calculated releases of pressure, that he was always in control when he lashed out because he lashed out in very specific and measured degrees - every single 'too far' was always 'just enough', its just no one else saw the raging volcanic inferno brewing just beneath the floorboards cus they were too distracted by how ear piercing the sound of the tea kettle going off was-

You're so sexy and I love you, but I wanna respond to you in spirit cus I can't find your post babes

We love 'biblically accurate' and 'devil's sacrament' as religious phrases yea? Well, my favorite (aside from 'heated fellowship', a black christian euphemism for fucking nasty) happens to be to 'know' or more specifically to 'know biblically', another word/phrase for fucking someone nasty.

stay with me this is going somewhere i promise pack a bag if you must

The interpretation I was raised with was that sexual intimacy was so vulnerable and exposing of one's most inner authenticity (that which apparently only God had such access to) that sex could make someone Know and See you the way Christ did (yadda yadda, "only fuck other Christians cus they'll be saved and sanctified enough to honor that blessing", yadda yadda) ANYWAY

THE POINT IS

You ever have someone in your life who just,,, saw you? Like, they could take one look at you and just Intuit Through The Vibes that something was up? Like they could just feel your energy and knew what to do or say or whatever? The kind of person who could walk into a room where you're minding your own business, doing something mundane, and they take one cursory scan of your posture and immediately ask "What's wrong?" like,,, what??? why do you ask??? what do you mean 'you can tell', I'm not fucking doing anything???

The kind of being seen for who you are that just leaves you feeling kinda exposed and tender? The kind of thing that leaves you bereft and yearning if you've never experienced it before (or had but lost it) because it feels like everyone only likes different mirages of you?

Andrew and Neil are so Relationship Of All Time because they seemed to See and Know each other like that even before they started locking lips on rooftops.

When Neil said "I want to see you lose control", i'm imagining Andrew probably felt so naked and flayed because everyone assumed he was perpetually losing his grip. On his anger, on his sanity, on reality, on his control. But like,,, Op's Spirit Of Post Long Lost, you were so fucking right. Every bit of Andrew's behavior was carefully calculated and intentionally released packages of what was his True Inner Turbulence that he would never dare release out into the open because that's not a target he's willing to give anyone a chance at aiming for.

Out of control? Andrew hasn't been that since he was probably a tween.

But Neil had never been fooled. From cigarettes and airport pickups to cigarettes and rooftop altercations, not once had he fallen for the mirage.

Without ever having needed to touch him in that way, Neil Knew Andrew. Biblically.

And that's why Andrew simply had to engage him in heated fellowship.

[nimmie-nugget]

~Hantengu Clones x Disgust Clone Reader~

Reminder: drink water and eat a full meal! Turn on dark mode if it’s currently night where you live~ wouldn’t want ya eyes to hurt right?~ —go to your profile and press the icon that’s on the VERY right, then click “General Settings” and scroll down a bit till you see “Color Palette” and there should be a few options for ya there!—

Warnings: ooc, not proofread, your not gonna like Karaku’s part, you might shit your pants

Note: I’ve had this in my mind for quite a long time!!! Google better be right for the kanji’s I have next to the clone’s names or Istg- This doesn’t mean I won’t stop doing Tokito twins content tho! I’ve been posting some other things instead of Tokito content so i just wanted to reassure~ don’t worry Tokito enthusiastic’s! Your emotion is disgust and your color is a mix of Yellow and Green~ Platonic ofc or else self love has a new meaning💀 Enjoy <3

Masterlist+Introduction

Masterlist

Sekido 怒

You CANNOT come to me and tell me this is not toxic. 💀🖕

Both of you argue the most out of the clones

There was a time your argument got WAY out of hand ‘n both of you started using your BDA like crazy!

Your always pointing out his lil flaws

Tho Sekido’s clothes are more tolerable.

You tease him but not as much as Karaku

Long story short both of you want each other to die 😣

“Why not you fix your hair before you start talking?”

“WE HAVE THE SAME HAIRSTYLE YOU BRAT!”

These two lines kinda giving sibling energy- 👆

Karaku 愉

Your grossed out by the fact he doesn’t wear proper clothing.

Just one touch and you go

“AHHHH!!! THIS IS UTTERLY DISGUSTING!”

Teases you A LOT. You and Sekido most likely teamed up once just to get him to shut up 😬

I think he just considers you a whore at this point-

Considering you always look at his abs ‘n shit but your just trynna tell him to wear some clothes in the most judging way possible 😭

How did he even miss that gaze full of disgust!? HECK it’s your emotion-

“I know you like this Y/n~” he says as he licks his hand. Bro’s a cat fr💀

You gave him the most disgusted look ever that day.

Urogi 幸

He’s too much for you to handle-

Your losing your sanity yeah tots like you didn’t lose it years ago😃

Let’s just say your BDA is to be able to mind control-

The moment he uses his BDA you instantly use your BDA on him if your near.

Tho despite you literally being disgusted of him in every single way, you still hold some respect for him.

“A,IS)EJWAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO” *Activated BDA*

You groan as you activate your BDA “I don’t have time for this! And keep ya mouth shut would ya?! Your voice is disgusting.”

Aizetsu 愁

You must admit he is quite tolerable then the other clones but that’s what makes it more disgusting.

You two have a pretty decent relationship.

Tho his outfit…it’s disgusting.

You don’t really hold…much disgust towards him???

Tho it’s just probably because he doesn’t annoy you much as the other clones.

OH YOU WERE VERY WRONG 😨

Your the only clone who doesn’t tease him or act serious.

That’s the explanation to him latching to your arm 24/7 👆💀

“UGHHH!!! GET OFF ME! YOUR FUCKING HEAVY!” You yelled.

“…Y/n don’t yell…that makes me sad…” he said clutching onto his staff

“This disgusts me. You disgust me.”

Yep, ya had to use your BDA to get him off.

But why ya gotta be so mean!!? >:(

But hey! Aizetsu’s confirmed to be a cat 😼

Zohakuten 憎

Let’s just say ALL of the clones are in a black void when Hantengu is in control 😶

Never though I’d say this but this relationship is WAY more toxic then yours with Sekido 😰

Your always commenting on how disgusting he is.

Roast him like a Roblox kid 😎

Tho you won’t be getting away just easily.

Considering he’s the STRONGEST of the clones you’ll def be beat to pieces 😭

“Ngh!…is that all you got? Your unreliable dragons can’t do shit to me! Utterly disgusting.” You say with a grin.

Hell you faced so many tortures that day- tho what scared ya the most was the fact that your regeneration slowed down 😰

Like- HOW!?!?

You swore to never go overboard with HIM ever again 🫡

[euphor1a]

Kei fucking your throat

thirst drabbles (8/∞)

fandom » &team

pairing » kei x f!reader

rating » 18+ (minors dni!)

genre » smut, established relationship.

word count » ~ 800

warnings » profanity, dom/sub undertones, throat fucking, kei has a fat cawk 🫣, gagging, dacryphilia, hair pulling, praising, pet names, dirty talk, size kink(?), cum swallowing, lmk if i missed anything!

“Mm–fuck, you take me so well, princess, my baby is taking my cock so well.” Kei grunts out, his hands cradling your face like you’re the most precious thing ever, while his thick shaft ruts into your mouth relentlessly. 

You moan around his length, eyes glazed with tears, pussy tingling, clit aching, body quivering — all for the man using your throat to relieve himself. He looks ethereal, even like this; teeth digging into his luscious lower lip, body tense as he thrusts into your mouth, hair all messed up and his face scrunching up from pleasure.

Sometimes you struggle to believe that you do in fact have scored a boyfriend like Kei, but at times like this, you feel an immense amount of pride to have this fine man all by yourself. You think back to how good he looked wearing a simple white shirt and a pair of jeans, and those lethal eye-glasses that made you lose every single bit of sanity – that made you drop to your knees.

“My angel, open up wider for me, yeah? I know you can fit it all inside you. Didn’t I teach you the way to do it?” He laughs breathily, one of his hands readjusting to grip on the back of your head. His other hand taps on your cheek. Even though it hurts quite a bit, you unhinge your jaw to open wider. Several tears escape your eyes from the pressure. Kei hums, easing his girth further into your throat, triggering your gag reflex. 

“Fucking hell, I didn’t even start, baby,” he hisses at the feeling of his cock getting clenched on, his fingers threading through your hair. You can only whine as he slowly starts rocking his hips back and forth, letting you get used to the feeling. But with each movement, he picks up his speed, plummeting into the depths of your gullet and making you choke around him. 

“That’s it, angel, just like that. You look so pretty, gagging and drooling over my cock, cheeks all wet with tears.” Kei groans, pulling onto your hair as if to ground himself. Your hands reach for his wrists, holding onto them for dear life as you feel your thighs shaking, ready to give up. His right hand reaches for your left one, intertwining your fingers together in a tight grip. You swallow around his cock, pussy clenching around nothing. It makes you press your thighs close, praying for some relief. 

A strangled moan escapes him, his pace getting sloppy as your throat continues to spasm around his sensitive cock. The unbuttoned shirt of his that hangs loosely from your shoulders leaves nothing to the imagination. Arousal has dripped down your thighs and made a whole mess, your breasts jiggling with each of his thrusts. Yet, all Kei can think about is how fucking gorgeous you look. A mess that can only whine and cry around his girth, his pretty mess.

“I’m so close, princess, ‘m so close. You’re gonna be a good girl and swallow it all for me, right?” Those words roll off his tongue smoothly, head tilting to the side in a cute manner. You nod and mewl in affirmation, swirling your tongue against his length as he slows down for a bit. “Fuck, your pretty little mouth is s’good to me, baby! I’m gonna come— fuck!”

Kei growls like a wounded animal, getting rougher at the end to chase his orgasm, which finally hits him after a while. He stills entirely, his whole body tense, balls resting against your chin as he unloads inside you. The warm, thick liquid sits heavy on your tongue, some of it dripping down to splatter over your chest. “You did so well for me, angel,” he mutters under his breath like a mantra, his grip on you tightening. 

After the dizzying sensations fade away a little, he gently pulls out from the comforting warmth of your mouth, even more of his release leaking out. Kei groans at the sight of the light sheen of spit and cum around his cock. “God,” he breathes out, also admiring your face covered with your tears, drool and his seed.  

He gives you the signal to swallow by tapping on your cheek, and you’re more than happy to oblige. As the thick, milky white liquid goes down your throat, he crouches down to pick up your small frame in his arms. He takes a fresh towel from the closet and places it on the bed, before gently settling you down on the soft mattress. 

“Kei~” you croon in a broken voice, reaching for him. “It hurts,” you rest your head against his toned stomach, whining. He ruffles your hair with a fond smile, gently pushing you down until you’re splayed out in front him. 

“I know, princess. I will make everything better, okay?” Kei smiles mischievously, reaches for your legs and pushes them apart, positioning himself to rest between your thighs. 

˗ˏˋ꒰ 💌 author’s notes ꒱

thank you so much for reading <33!! i hope you enjoyed it! to be really honest this is kinda out of my comfort zone 😳, but i still wrote this bc look aT HIM?!?! INSANITY!!! brainrot is very very brainrotting— *ahem*, anyway, apologies for any mistakes left in there!

consider leaving a reblog or a comment to let me know what you think of this!! feedback through asks will be appreciated too! support your local writers, it keeps us motivated to create and share 🌸!

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[inficetegodwottery]

A call for aid from Firefox Users

I have absolutely no fucking idea how to solve these problems, and there are asks with no answers all over the internet elsewhere that are years old.

There is a weirdly hostile atmosphere on Reddit's Firefox boards to asking questions about features Firefox doesn't seem to have. And obviously, official support forums are about as helpful as they ever are. Given that I've seen and reblogged countless extremely informative posts about Firefox stuff on Tumblr, I just have to hope one of you guys knows answers to some of these issues.

Because I want to move away from Chrome. I really, really do. It is a constant source of stress and fear at this point. Google is an insanely evil fucking company and I despise them, and admire Firefox's stances on privacy and commitment to user security. But I cannot use a browser that lacks so many of the organizational elements I'm used to using in order to deal with my extreme neurodivergence and inability to process information all at once combined with my tendency towards flitting from one train of thought to another constantly.

Using Firefox (I've tried to switch five times over six or seven years) in the past has been overwhelming and stressful and completely devoid of certain features I could use to control those feelings on browsers like Chrome, Opera, and even Safari.

So if anyone has any solutions or suggestions for the specific issues I describe below, it would be an enormous weight off my shoulders, and help me feel a lot safer than I do now.

I'll admit that my tab fever is insane, and I've regularly racked up 2000+ tabs on Chrome. But I can sleep/unload just about all of those tabs constantly, making it so I can keep my trains of thought completely paused without the slightest impact on my computer's performance while I work on something else, and come right back to them without having to dig through the Bookmark system. And the way I generally keep that insane number of bookmarks organized is with separate windows and TAB GROUPING. Bless tab grouping, the saviour of my sanity. With that feature, I can have a completely organized tab tree with color coding, searchable groups, easily group and ungroup tabs or move them to different windows, and I can manage all of them from the same UI I'm managing ungrouped tabs from.

This is a feature which Firefox appears to fundamentally lack, despite apparently having had it implemented fully at some point.

I will say that I tried several addons before making this post, specifically Simple Tab Groups, which was atrocious, and Panorama View actually looks fantastic, but also.... Firefox has placed a security warning on that one. Great.

So if anyone knows of a hidden browser settings option, an overlooked tab grouping addon, or some other way to implement that feature on Firefox, I would be eternally in your debt. I just do not have the ability to process or work on a browser that I can only have like forty tabs open without losing track of everything I'm doing because they're all on a single ribbon. Or completely overloading my RAM.

On that note, is there any setting to make the browser use less memory? I've had the core process run up to almost a dozen gigs of RAM with only twenty tabs open, and there's absolutely no way it needed all that processing power for four YouTube tabs and a bunch of settings pages.

Lastly, there are a number of times while I was using Firefox that I lost power or the program crashed (and it crashed a LOT) and I lost everything. Every tab, every bit of work I was doing at the time, with no way to recover them. I've had that happen with Chrome too, but WAY less often, and when it recovers all my tabs it does so while PRESERVING MY TAB GROUPS, and it also doesn't load every tab in until I actually move to that tab. Firefox loads every tab it's recovering all at once, which usually completely locks up my computer.

At this point I'm pretty much only using Firefox to watch YouTube videos past the adblock, despite desperately wanting to transfer literally everything over to a browser that I KNOW is the safer and better option. But every time I've tried, the total inability to organize like I used to, losing all my progress and being unable to regain it whatsoever, or just using up four times the amount of resources that my browsing would on another platform has drive me away. I don't want to be driven away. I want to solve this, but I've had to accept that I can't do that alone.

I greatly appreciate any help or advice anyone can give. Even if just only one of these questions gets answered or only one of these problems gets solved, that's a win in my books. And thank you for reading, even if you don't have any of the answers I'm looking for.

[cod-dump]

*breaks down your Inbox's door* *heavy breathing* I've made my own Shadow OCs but don't think this means I'm happy about it.

*I am actively losing sanity because Graves and his Shadows have me in a death grip*

So here, here are my Shadows. There's like nothing on them cause I've just now made this shit up for ~reasons~

Andrew 'Woody' Fallwood. Gets his callsign from his name and the fact he's a cowboy. Around 5'11", not very big but is plenty strong. He's a silly guy, likes to make jokes and stuff to keep the others calm, especially big boy Moose. Almost always has a cigarette in his mouth. Can be a bit of an ass but that's just cause he's a stubborn little Southern man. More of an Appalachian southern man, and grew up on a cattle farm. Just really loves cows cause he has so many fond memories of the cows under his family's care. Scary good shot. At least it's scary until people learn he grew up in rural Appalachia and then it's just "oh you've been shooting since you were six, haven't you?"

Cole 'Flash' Halley. Tall, lanky guy that stands at around 6'2". Youngest to be recruited into Shadow Company, often gets called "Baby" or similar things since he's so young. Instantly became so many of the Shadows' new younger brother. Gets his name from one of his first days as a Shadow where he beat a record for completing an obstacle course in the fastest time. He holds all the records for "fastest" on so many things on base, including "fastest time to get a hug from Moose". Cause while Moose is a nice guy and all, he doesn't just go around hugging people, especially the newer Shadows. All Flash had to do though was walk up to him in tears and Moose's big brother instincts kicked in. This was his second day on base. He's the stereotypical little brother, though, cause he's constantly doing things to piss other Shadows off/to just be annoying for the hell of it.

Matthew 'Truck' Simmons. Shorter (around 5'8"), but broad, bulky guy. He's been dubbed "getaway driver". He drives everything, from the great big tanks to just normal ass cars. Definitely a truck freak, and is always in the shop, working on any of the numerous terrain vehicles the Shadows have. Had to repeat a couple of school years, and the second he turned 18 he enlisted. He was sick of being told he wasn't "smart" just because he can't do well on academic tests. But put a truck in front of him and a toolkit and he can tell you every single thing about that truck in extreme detail.

Jacob 'Ness' Owens. Not tall at all compared to most other Shadows, only around 5'6". He's a superb swimmer, and is almost always in the water. Loves to dive and do other water related missions. If he could, he'd swim in the outdoor pool year long (it's closed during the off seasons), but luckily the indoor pool's temperature is more easily controlled, thus allowing him to intentionally make it colder. These pools are for training, but the indoor one tends to be more recreational. Ness is required to sign into something when he wants to swim, cause he always makes it colder, and Graves got sick of the complaining from Shadows trying to swim after he's done. Gets his callsign from the fact he's often in his full wetsuit while swimming, and one time, during the night, several Shadows saw him swimming outside and joked he looked like the Loch Ness Monster. He's very quiet and rarely talks, doesn't like to be around a lot of people, but does a good job and is still friendly enough. Prefers giving in to his cryptid namesake (and the fact he's Ohioan) and doing weird things to get out of conversations. (like staring wide-eyed at them and sinking under the table like it's the water level)

*Ness is my baby boy I love him so much*

Anyways, back to complaining over my willing obsession over Graves and Shadow Company

Ah, the brainrot has a firm root if you made ocs HAHAHAHAHAHAH-

-

Moose is actually an excellent swimmer and handles the cold pretty well so him and Ness would bond over that. Moose won’t stay in the water as much but he would definitely join him for a swim.

Flash would definitely be mothered by Moose. Having joined when he was pretty young himself he’s pretty protective of younger Shadows. He tries to not be overbearing but sometimes he can’t help it and worries over them.

Moose would love to hear Truck talk about his vehicles. He knows a few things himself about them, well enough to get them running or to make repairs if needed. He likes listening to people talk about things they’re passionate about.

Woody would definitely be good friends with Moose. The jokes would win him over and they have a shared love for cows. But the accent would definitely have a part in it, something Moose won’t admit. A southern accent is very comforting to him.

[beneathstarryskies]

Day 31: Vampirism with Alucard Tepes

Warnings: yandere, dubious consent, vampire, blood, ooc Alucard

Taglist: @actuallysaiyan @loki-love @the-eternal-sunflower

HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE! I wanted to do something a little spooky for Halloween, so here it is!

Your lover had warned you of his insatiable thirst for blood. He’d told you that the closer the two of you became, the more he longed to taste you. Even more so, the signs had been there. You’d ignored them. Writing it off as affection when his mouth lingered on your throat a bit too long or he held your wrist to his nose to take long, greedy sniffs. It had never occurred to you that all along Alucard was simply feeding his own desire. He’d take in the scent of your blood and relish hearing it pumping through your veins. 

No, you’d trust him so implicitly it had never once occurred to you that he might lose this fight. It never crossed your mind that he might decide he deserved a taste. 

Your own foolishness had gotten you into this position. Low hanging branches tear at your clothes as you run for your life. The silence of the dark night is only broken by the growling of the white wolf chasing after you. It’s glowing eyes don’t miss a single move you make through the woods. 

You keep running until sudden you trip over a large tree root. Just before you hit the ground, a pair of strong arms catch you. Usually it would be a relief to find yourself in the arms of your lover, but now your heart rushes with fear. His eyes glow red as his long blond hair spills in front of his face. Your eyes are drawn to the pearly white fangs exposed through his grimaced lips. You swallow hard as you stare at them. 

“Why would you run from me, darling?” Alucard pouts. “Didn’t you promise to stay with me forever?” 

Your eyes widen and you try to pull away from him. Alucard squeezes you tighter, holding you flush against his chest. He leans in close enough for you to feel his breath tickle your neck. 

“Please don’t hurt me,” you whimper. 

“Oh, my sweet lover,” he coos. “Of course I won’t hurt you. I just need to taste you.” 

“But…” 

“Shush, little dove. Relax,” he kisses you softly as his thumb drags across your pulsing jugular. “No, I won’t hurt you at all, my little dove. I only wish to have a drink.” 

You don’t feel secure with this promise. Just minutes earlier, he had you cornered in the castle and was expressing his desire to drain every last drop of your precious blood. He’d been wild with thirst, and in a moment of sanity he’d told you to run. You had been so deep in the woods you feared yourself lost when you realized he was chasing you. Now, he’s caught you. You’re but prey ensnared in his trap. 

“Adrian, please. I love you so much,” you whimper. “Please don’t hurt me.” 

“It won’t hurt a bit,” he coos softly. 

He pushes your skirt up around your thighs, and his long fingers toy with your slit. You try to push him away, but it’s no use. You find yourself growing weaker and weaker to his touch. He pushes your panties aside and his fingertips circle around your clit. Just as you’re starting to moan with pleasure, you feel his fangs scrape against your skin. He kisses your neck softly, but it’s just a ruse. As soon as you relax, his sharp fangs pierce your skin. You cry out, but you’re too weak to push him off of you. Alucard moans with unbridled pleasure as he begins to drink from that beautiful vein. 

“Please,” you manage to squeak out. 

He only moans in response. Your vision is starting to fade by the time he’s had his fill. When you lose consciousness, you’re quite sure you’ve died. 

Then, you wake up the next morning tucked into the bed you’ve shared with Alucard over these last few months. His cool hand soothes gently over your cheek as he coaxes you to wake up completely. You bolt upright, and you think it was all a bad dream until you reach up and feel the bandage around you neck. There’s one around your thigh as well and one of your wrists. 

“See, my darling,” his velvet voice echoes. “I told you it wouldn’t hurt. You hardly felt a thing.” 

[bi-naesala]

Dismas and lovers

10. Jester

If there’s one thing Dismas can say, with absolute certainty, about Sarmenti, it’s that he’s loud; apart from the obvious lute, which he keeps strumming in a way that really makes you want to grab it and smash it over his head, and the jingles of those stupid bells he keeps attached to his hat, he constantly laughs.

It’s not even a nice, warm laugh; it’s creepy, it’s weird, it’s… He’s not even able to describe it. Disturbed, maybe? Like you can tell something’s wrong with him, something big.

Dismas thought that, given the gloominess of his companions, that this was going to be a breath of fresh air, but that wasn’t the case at all.

Ugh, he wants him to shut his trap so bad, eternally too – that would be excellent.

With time, thankfully, he becomes more bearable, though whether that’s because he’s learned to tone down his voice, or if it’s because Dismas is slowly losing his sanity, this is hard to tell.

He’s learned to tune it out, to the point that, now, his incessant talking has become background noise, way less annoying than it used to be.

It would still be better if he found a different hobby than yapping his mouth on the worst occasions, but he supposes he can’t begrudge the guy for it: everyone copes in different ways, his is simply louder than usual.

In a way, he kind of reminds him of himself, when he was younger: loud, brash, never taking anything seriously, way too loud and way too sarcastic.

Not that he’s actually gotten wiser over the years, though: he simply learned to keep that shit for himself not to cross anyone who shouldn’t be crossed.

Maybe he’ll learn too, or maybe not. Frankly, he shouldn’t care about it and yet… He can’t help but to have a bit of a soft spot for the guy, even if he’s incredibly annoying.

He won’t try to get him under his wing because he’s no teacher, and because frankly it feels insulting to Sarmenti; he can look after himself without him nagging, though if he’s in trouble when Dismas happens to be nearby, well, why shouldn’t he give him a hand?

He’s always tried to be casual about it, not wanting to make a big deal out of it – that would be the absolute worst – but unfortunately for him, Sarmenti is more perceptive than what he’s given him credit for.

“Oh, my hero!” he sighs, in an obviously fake dreamy tone, after Dismas saves him from the umpteenth potential fight with the tavern owner – why does he like provoking him so much?

“Just shut up,” Dismas replies, looking away. “How about you stop getting into stupid fights, instead?”

Really, he should’ve learned his lesson at some point.

“Why should I? I can always count on my white knight to save me, after all.”

Oh, so that’s how it is? This guy, he swears…

“Y’know, you shouldn’t count on me saving your ass all the time. Next time I might not be there to help you.”

“You think? Curious, then, that you constantly tail me…”

Shit, he’s onto him.

Damn it, Dismas, you’re getting soft.

“I’ve had people pursue me, but never in such a roundabout way. You know you can just ask, right?”

At those words, Dismas almost chokes, but he manages not to, for his dignity’s sake – not that there is much of it to save anyway.

“The hell?!”

Sarmenti laughs, that laugh which Dismas has grown accustomed too. At least one of them is finding this funny.

“You don’t have to be shy, now,” the idiot bard insists, leaning closer and closer to Dismas. Just because he’s taller, doesn’t mean he should use it to his advantage; besides, he’s not really intimidating, not when Dismas knows he could easily take him – in a fight, of course!

… To tell the truth, he had thought about that a couple of times – every single resident of the Hamlet has thought about it, actually – but this has nothing to do with that is happening right now!

He doesn’t know what to say – he knows that any word that leaves his mouth will be used against him – which gives Sarmenti the occasion to keep babbling and babbling and babbling. Ugh, Dismas hates when he does that.

What to do? He has to find a way to stop him, or else it’ll get harder and harder to control the urge to stab him. Ideas, he needs some ideas… Or maybe he could…

Well, since he was the one who brought it up in the first place, maybe there is an effective way to shut him up; he moves quickly, without giving Sarmenti the chance to react or else he would’ve been the one getting stabbed that day – probably – because what he’s doing might not be something he likes at all, but it’s too late to stop now, not when Dismas has already gotten to his mask, raising it just enough to uncover up to his nose, then he presses their lips together. Ah, finally, silence.

This time, Sarmenti’s the one who struggles, when they pull away. The asshole teased, teased and teased, and yet he obviously didn’t believe him capable of something like that; serves him right.

“You!”

It’s Dismas turn to laugh, now, and he does without holding anything back, uncaring that he must be hurting Sarmenti’s ears with how loudly he’s being.

He’s not surprised when, moved by frustration, Sarmenti pulls him forward by his scarf and kisses him again; he could easily pull away, but he goes along with it – it doesn’t feel bad, after all.

At least, now, they’ve found a way to shut each other up.

[sarahscribbles]

It might be Valentine's Day this week, but tomorrow is the vastly superior Galentine's Day and I couldn't let it pass without showing all my amazing computer friends how important you all are to me. I'm so grateful for you all and the porn we all share together. It warms my heart like nothing else.

I've written you all a lil something because I love you all so, so much

Love, Saz 💕

@cake-writes I begrudgingly recognise that you are a pal, even if you bully me relentlessly. My only issue is that you live so far away in upside down land so I can't see your eccentric gay ass in person. You have been an amazing friend to me over the past year and helped me through some really dark times. Talking with you makes my day and any time we don't talk for whatever reason, I'm always by my phone like "I miss Bri." I love you so much and I hope you feel it all the way in Oz.

@the-lady-amphitrite Amphi, you know how much I adore you. I can't go a single day without speaking to you and I wouldn't ever want to. I don't know what I did to deserve you as a friend, but I am giving thanks to the universe that our paths crossed. You are unhinged, but in the best way that I would never want to change. You listen to me be a whore 99.9% of the time (and also in the other 0.1% where I'm ranting/crying/exploding over something completely unrelated), and I get to be one of the first people to hear what goes on in that whorish brain of yours. You are a joy to know and I wouldn't choose anyone else to be an unhinged whore with.

@muertawrites My OG Tumblr pal. The one and only first friend. I would be lost without you always in my corner and always encouraging me to be the best whore I can be. You're always ready to drop everything to listen to me vent about my Latest Problem and I don't tell you enough how much I appreciate it. You are so strong and so amazing and damn if I'm not lucky to have someone like you on the other end of a DM while we go through the horrors of figuring out our 20s. I love you so much!

@muddyorbsblr One of my New Friend Recruits that I'm endlessly grateful for. Talking with you is like being wrapped in a warm blanket while drinking hot chocolate. You're absolutely an enabler but I wouldn't have it any other way! You're so encouraging with my porn even though it's killed you multiple times and I appreciate your dedication to the cause. You never fail to provide the filth and I thank you for that. You're hilarious and fantastic and talented and I'm so glad I get to call you my friend!

@cheekyscamp AYOOO my fellow rear enthusiast! You are also completely unhinged daily in my DMs but I actively encourage this! And the talent you possess?! Outstanding! You have a freaking heart of gold and Lord am I glad you decided you wanted to interact with my dumb ass! I love whoring out with you even if I do lose a little bit of my sanity each time. I can't wait to see what this friendship brings!

@springdandelixn My Beans! You are just all round amazing and talented and fierce and I love you so, so much. You've listened to all my silly vents without complaint and been the voice of reason every single time that's saved me from spiralling and making a mountain out of a molehole. I don't know what I would do without you! You're always ready to throw hands on my account and I want to send you the biggest, tightest hug for being on my side. Keep on moosin'!

@joyful-enchantress Steph, my love! You've been with me since almost day one of my Loki days and I'm so glad of it! I don't think you have a bad bone in your body, and I am so infinitely grateful for all the support you've given me (including photos of London when I've been feeling down)! I always love talking with you and hearing the filthy ideas that come out of your head, and I'm so thankful that you decided to start writing and let us see how talented you are! You're a wonderful person inside and out!

@mochie85 Mochie, you are a delight! Honestly, I couldn't find one bad thing to say about you if someone paid me to. You are endlessly supportive and uplifting and beautiful and so damn talented! How did I get so lucky to have so many talented friends? You're someone I look up to and try to be like - effortlessly kind and just an all round good egg. I love you so much, my dear!!

@give-me-a-moose Cas, I love you so much. You might not know it, but HoC got me out of such a bad writing slump last year, so I credit you with the filth that followed! You have been so supportive both with my writing and with other shit that's been going on and I can't thank you enough for everything you've done for me! I know I keep parroting this, but you're amazing and I'm so lucky to have you as a friend. You can make me laugh so easily and reading about your work escapades always puts me in a good mood (praying that you find your museum dad soon)!

@lokisgoodgirl I know we only talk sporadically and briefly (and even then it hasn't been without some bumps), but it's plain as day that you have a good heart (and an equally filthy mind that we're all thankful for). You're the reason I've met so many wonderful people on here and I'm so thankful for it. I can only hope that there are no more bumps along the way because you're the type of person that everyone needs in their life. (Though I'm still going to beat you at that dance off).

@fictive-sl0th Camille, you are without a doubt one of the kindest souls I have ever met. You are a human rainbow! Anytime I see you in my notifications my mood increases by 110% because I know it's going to be something that will make me smile (something you have never yet failed to do)! I want to bottle you up and keep you with me all the time! You're wonderful and talented and a little ray of light in so many people's lives!

@simplyholl You've been in my notifications from almost day one of the Loki shenanigans so I've considered you a friend for a very long time! I don't know how someone can be equal parts incredibly sweet and a complete whore but you manage to do it perfectly! You've also supported me through so much shit and I can't thank you enough for it. I'm sending you a massive hug (I'd send you Loki if I could) for everything you've done for me over the past ? years. You are a wonderful human being!

@maple-seed Maple, you are also completely unhinged and I adore it. You make me laugh so much and when your name pops up in the server my first thought is "oh yeah this gonna be good!" You're another New Friend Recruit that I'm glad to have in the ranks! You deserve all the good things (because you are a good thing) and I love you so much!

@loopsisloops I freaking adore you, Loops! You keep me feeling young and hip, but also prevent the whore in me from dying with all the thirst traps and photos you never run out of! You're a sweetheart with a heart of gold and I hope everyone in your life knows how amazing you are. (If they treat you than anything less than amazing I will fight them)!

@kinky-faerie I am so glad you have managed to find your way into my corner of this hellsite. You are full of filth and I wouldn't have it any other way! I love nothing more than checking this app first thing in the morning and seeing your name in my inbox because I know it's going to set the horny mood for the rest of the day! You are my favourite kinky lil fairy!

@lokiprompts You are so strong and amazing I can't put it into proper words. You never fail to be positive and supportive and every compliment you've given me has made me grin like a complete idiot. I hope you get all the love you deserve and all the love you put out into the universe because you deserve it tenfold!

@coldnique Girl, you are just all kinds of lovely! You have such a kind heart and I couldn't find one bad thing to say about you. You're always popping up with your hilarious comments when I need a little bit of a mood booster and my day instantly improves! I'm so freaking grateful that you're one of my Regulars now and just know that I adore you!!

@holymultiplefandomsbatman my fellow sub!Loki enthusiast! You are a delight to know and an amazing friend to have. Your mind is wonderful as are you as a person! You are so incredibly smart and capable and I wish you knew that! I'll tell you every single day if I have to. There's nothing you can't do and I fully believe you are going to shake the world! How you manage to find time to write such amazing filth while also being a bad bitch getting your degree is beyond me and I bow to you! You are going to do amazing things, I have no doubt! I love you so incredibly much and I can't wait to see what amazing filth that brain of yours comes up with next!

[spinningwebsandtales]

Imagine Being A Time Traveler And Meeting Nicholas

Nicholas D Wolfwood X FemReader

Rating: T

Warnings: Mentions of near death and weapons

Word Count: 843

Requested by @ceylon-morphe286​

(A/N:) Sorry it took me a little while to get this finished. I wanted to sit down and write several times last week but alas life once again got in my way. Thank you for your patience and I am so pleased with finally getting this posted for you! Thank you so much again for your request I had a lot of fun writing this, it was something that made me think and try my best with! I hope you enjoy it! Until next time happy reading! ~Countess

As a traveler of time and universes, you had visited many places and many different times and you could honestly say you enjoyed every single one. But now this place that you found yourself called Noman’s Land was the worst place you decided. As it was most likely going to be your doom as the sun beat down upon your exhausted form. You had no water nor food and it was taking it’s toll on your body. The desert seemed to trail on forever and you just knew that you were not going to make it much further at all. You were beginning to give up, resolved to just rest and become worm food when you saw a shadow on the horizon. You chalked it up to a desert formed illusion. The shape of a man with a large cross in tow just had to be a cruel trick of your near impending death.

Nicholas D. Wolfwood couldn’t understand what brought him this way. He had been heading to the next town over when he had gotten turned around. It made him frustrated as it wasn’t like him to get turned around unless he meant to be. When he spotted a figure sprawled out in the sand, he couldn’t help to think that it was fate that brought him this way. You could barely speak once he got to your side but when he shared some of his water and gave you a little food, you perked up a little bit. He seemed to be skeptical as you explained how you got there and your powers. Until he started to think about how he was virtually unkillable and lugging around a machine gun no ordinary man should even be able to drag, so he just shrugged and continued to listen. Once you finished he helped you up.

“It’s a little hard to believe,” he said. “But who I am I to judge? You’re not going to make it on your own until your powers return.”

“If,” you interrupted. “I really don’t want to be stuck here but I can’t help but realistic either.”

“Guess it’s up to me to teach you the ropes. C’mon we need to get you somewhere safe before your worm chow.”

“Worms,” you shivered at the thought.

Nicholas grunted in acknowledgement, grinning wickedly as he knew he was going to have fun teasing you as well.

It didn’t take you long to realize after you met Nicholas D. Wolfwood that he was a man you didn’t cross and he was also a snot. He teased you constantly as you floundered, trying to find your place in this unknown world and how little you understood about survival. All you could was glare as you didn’t want him leaving you alone. Though it pained you to admit, you’d be dead ten times over if he hadn’t stepped in and rescued you. If it wasn’t creatures, it was people. If it wasn’t people, it was plants. You honestly felt like you couldn’t win for losing. You missed home greatly and Nicholas always listened closely as you told him of your home. He seemed amazed at first, but you could tell that even he had grown skeptical at whether you were telling the truth. But if he didn’t want to believe that’s okay. If he had been in your shoes in your timeline, you most likely wouldn’t believe him either as this whole place was just utter chaos with a side of insanity. You questioned your sanity a little bit, though you were glad that you met this weirdo of a Punisher. He had become your saving grace many times over, you just hoped that he thought the same of you. He was a great teacher as he showed you the ropes and taught you to defend yourself. 

You found that the weeks you had been here had passed by quickly and you were growing wiser in the ways of treading across Noman’s Land. You found your own food, your sense of direction and finding places improved, and bandits found themselves at your mercy now. Nicholas could sit back and watch in pride as his new creation flourished in the harsh environment. When he thought about you leaving, he did grow sad. He enjoyed your company and it made his travels a little less lonely, and he begrudgingly admitted, safer. You grinned up at your mentor now friend, grinning widely as your skills grew better and better. Part of you hoped that you never returned home, though you couldn’t deny the homesickness deep inside. But if you could remain here with Nicholas, it didn’t seem so bad as you had grown attached. You hoped that maybe he had grown a little attached to you to. The little voice in your head finally spoke up and you knew that he did. It made you feel giddy that he cared enough to protect you, but it meant more that he taught you and made you a part of his world. Maybe Noman’s Land wasn’t so bad after all.

[battlelegendsredandblue]

yo! things have been heating up at the battle tree! i guess we’ve been doing pretty good advertising on this blog (despite it ain’t really an advertising page, we’re just awesome like that.) so we’d like to say thanks, for a limited time, we’re cutting the challenge a bit shorter than usual! unorthodox, i hear you say?

maybe, but it’s not every day you face me and red! so in exchange for it being a little shorter than normal, it’ll be a lot harder, earning ya more bp, and maybe you’ll have a story to tell of beating a famous trainer or a living legend!

the normal course is now 10 and the super course is 30, swing by alola and check it out, yeah?

-blue

It’s the 300 followers special! I was debating on how to celebrate it, and I think I got it! I’m going to be writing about battles! But who’s going to be battling? Your muse’s pokémon of course! Who’s going to be battling who? Single or Doubles? Did your muse make it to Red and/or Blue? Did they lose to them? Or did they choke to Wally or Cynthia instead? Maybe even win against a normal trainer and were satisfied? That’s for you to decide!

I’ll be maxing out at 30, because I don’t want to die, and will generally be only going around 300 words and at the trainers last Pokémon, both for my mind and sanity. They’ll be written in a “recorded” format and your blog will be @‘d. Just follow the form link!

Thank you for enjoying my first pkmnirl blog! It’s been such a fun journey!

[sable-skies]

TLDR: You are so right about Voltron. And my new understanding of the shows many shortcomings resulted in a stupidly long rant where I said nothing you didn’t say already.

…

The fact that they were supposed to be found family, but ended up being co-workers 😭

My memories are admittedly a bit blurry (I refuse to rewatch it for my own sanity!)

But I so clearly remember them all being so… mean(?) to one another, especially to Lance. Both the writers and the characters usually treated him as a joke. Ouch.

I just remember them snapping at eachother alot, and I don’t think there were all that many instances where they had proper heart-to-heart conversations (not counting Keith and Shiro)

There were only of handful of instances where they all felt like friends. The Swap Moon??? Trading Planet??? -episode being one of them.

(It‘s stupid, and small. But I still fondly remember that one scene where they make noises and argue about the sound a blaster makes)

And as you said- most of them barely felt like they had relationships. Lance was generally the most connected I think; Bff with Hunk, usually played off of Coran, became Keith‘s right hand man (I think they were one of my favorite duos if I remember correctly. And I enjoyed watching them balance eachother out. Even if the Lion swap sucked.), had some moments with Pidge, and he did end up with Allura. Zero connection to Shiro though, which is weird. He‘s their OG leader after all.

And Allura. ALLURA. She always felt sidelined to me, which??? Voltron is HER FATHERS legacy?! HELLO?! I wish we had seen more of her development on screen. Her hatred of Galra (Keith dipped so quickly after finding out what he is, I wish there had been more there), losing her people (how come that came only into play much later???) it‘s just so AUGH.

Let‘s stick Keith on a space whale for character development while we‘re here. Bye Bye I guess.

The fact that they fumbled the Ball so bad when it comes to these characters and their relationships is so wild. You can LITERALLY trace all their goals, EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. back to 'wanting to find family/home'. Lover - Shiro. Parent - Pidge and Keith. Family - Hunk and Lance. Home - Allura and Coran

And the way the show was always advertised is so frustrating. Adam being the most egregious example course. But also 'Diplomat Hunk' for example. So often I remember them saying stuff like 'this character will have a bigger spotlight in future episodes'. And then they just. Didn‘t.

(The fact that they expanded the cast at the end was a horrible choice imo. They were already floundering with the core 7)

Also- I totally agree. "It doesn’t matter where I come from, who my parents are, or what they did. I am my own person! And I found my own home!" And then- half a season (?) later it‘s "I‘m going with the Blade to find out more about my mom."

Those are the kind of arcs that piss me off the most. I liked Keith before that scene, but I have to admit that this decision made me dislike him a little bit.

I get that this kind of stuff can be complicated irl, and that it isn‘t always easy to move past the 'never knew my parent' situation.

But just ONCE. I wanted a character to say that and STICK with it.

Piling onto all that the fact that they always stuck the paladins with clearly established relationships together obviously didn‘t help. You are so right for everything you said. I didn’t even realise how many thoughts I had about the show.

I can‘t wait for you to tear it into pieces sometime in the future. It‘ll be cathartic I‘m sure.

SHAKING YOUR HAND I LIKE UR MAGIC WORDS FUNNY ANON

Honestly it would probably be better if I never did touch it again but alas, I'm a spiteful creature who loves getting angry so when I get the chance to I leap like a damn frog. Also I've never seen season 8, I was so completely out of the series by the time it came out that I never even bothered. One day I'm gonna watch it. One day.

YOURE RIGHT THO I'm gonna admit this: I disliked Pidge heavily for awhile because I thought she was so damn mean and given her history of not giving a shit about anyone other than her family i was like "yeah i hate you now" not anymore i think, she'd probably land a solid 5 on a 10 scale for me nowadays but man. Man.

THE BLASTER SCENE IS SO ICONIC BECAUSE IT FELT SO GENUINE!! I think they tried too hard to replicate some of that earlier magic in later seasons but it all just. fell flat on its face. like a pug with bad coordination. it's so embarrassing now looking back.

I THINK I REMEMBER DIPLOMAT HUNK OH MY GOD. smashing my head into a wall AHUAHGHGHAHH this show is gonna give me brain damage im so MAD. all of it is so. BLOWS UP BLOWS UP BLOWS UP!!!!!!!

oh dude i cannot even remember the human characters they introduced in season 7(?), which ever one it was. like i remember griffin because he got into a fight with keith but thats about it. the rest of them are literally cardboard cutouts of people. and i hate how the garrison was handled, i wish they were a bit more morally grey but shrugs yknow. whatever WRITERS. hnrn.

I understand the value of family, but man sometimes water is thicker than blood and I think its important to show that!! let these kids be friends with each other and find the home theyre missing in each other!!!! WRITERS WHEN I GET YOU-

i enjoy your thoughts about the show as well!! its rather nice to reflect back on it and spit some venom with others who also hate that damn thing. my therapist would be so happy with this i think. (i should email her)

One Day. One day its gonna happen.

[kedreeva]

Hello fucker im the anon losing my absolute marbles about godfuckingdamned stranger things

Not only are you apparently not going alone to hell and have fucking grabbed me and decided to take me along with you you fuck but i feel as though i was plucked out the 3 story window of my fucking flat and shoved inti the metaphorical backseat of the fucking zamboni machine heading straight for hells fiery gates WHILE I WAS MERELY TRYING TO WET MY NIN EXISTENT FLOWERS ON THE WINDOW SEAL

Having said that i can absolutely fucking tell that the characters themselves are holding the fucking thing together and it would work eith absolutely nonsensical plot SINCE I KNOW ALMOST NONE OF THE PLOT (UNFORTUNATELY I DO KNOW A BIT NOW SINCE IVE BEEN CONSUMING THE FUCKING FICS OF THIS FANDOM LIKE A MANIAC FOR THE PAST 2 DAYS) AND IM STILL LOSING MY SHIT OVER THEM

I have also fucking decided to start watching the fucking thing right fucking now even though im so fucking behind on several deadlines and assignments including a very important one thats due right thia fuckinh week and for which i have yet to write ANYTHING and which has to be about 80 fucking pages long by the end of it so yes i am truly having the fucking time of my life goddamn it i was gonna start watching the fucking thing literally last night but i fell fucking asleep at about 2am because of the all nighter i had pulled the previous night reading the fucking steddie fics and last night i fell asleep woth my fucking phone in my hand doing guess fucking what READING ON AO3 ONCE AGAIN

I literally only vaguely know how steve and eddie look and dustin a little bit and robin a little bit and thats IT but goddamn do i have strong feelings for like 9 characters i know fuckall about except for fanon

As for the goddamn fic that made me lose the last of my sanity it wasnt even a Proper h/c per se just had some h/c in it which was game enough for my tired ass to deem it a h/c fic in my exvaustion and insanity and i do NOT unfortunately remember the name of it but i do know that it was by a fellow whose usernmae is pukner which i somehow remember and it was about 40k long amd what fucking made me read it and LOSE it and i mean LOSE IT like fucking LOSE IT was that it had NONBINARY steve kedreeva it had fucking NONBINARY STEVE so yeah i truly have given uo all of my 2 drops of remaining sanity for the smallest possible little bit of serotonin i could possibly receive

KEDREEVA ITS GOTTEN SO FUCKING BAD I ENDED UP HAVING TO DITCH MY HANDMADE HANDPICKED SPOTIFY PLAYLIST FOR MY LAST FUCKING HYPERFIXATION EARLIER AND FUCKING LOOKING UP A STEDDIE PLAYLIST IM LOSING IT THAT BADLY

I blame you SO hard for everything you are literally never gonna stop hearing from me about this you shall deal with every single mental breakdown and Thought™ that i have because of stranger things from now on because youre the reason why im in this shitshow in the first place my fucking friends and acquaintances and EVERYONE both online AND IRL have been trying to get me to watch stranger things EVER SINCE IT FIRST CAME OUT and _THIS_ is what fucking does me in

Well, I found the fic in question, and a) there's more than one NB Steve written by this person and also they're on tumblr by the same name

and b) Hey....... anyone out there got some nonbinary steve harrington fics to rec? bonus if they're hurt/comfort fics apparently. If I'm going to be blamed, I'm gonna fuckin EARN IT :D Drop 'em in the replies or reblogs or askbox, happy to reblog tumblr links too.

c) heyyyy drop your Steddie playlists for anon let's make it worse as a FAMILY

[saradotpsd]

An obsessive girl’s guide to books about obsession

Originally posted on Medium here.

The word obsession and its variations will appear in this piece at an annoying rate for you, I’m sorry in advance.

I’ve fallen down a rabbit hole and I’m enjoying it too much to leave. It is eye opening as much as it is relatable though. Books depicting obsession have been a sort of obsession for me, I’m fascinated by these helpless characters and the situations they end up in because of their intense feelings, and it was delicious losing myself in their plots.

I’ve been looking for these books because I wanted a mirror to my OCD that makes me think “oh.. so this is what my intensity of feelings looks like”, and now that I’ve found a bunch of them, I had to compile a list of every single one I’ve read.

I tried to add as many types of obsessions in these recommendations other than romantic obsession, even though that was the one that held my curiosity the most. This list will be updated as I go through more and more books in the future, but this piece starts with the first 8 books I read, and I’m doing them in the order I read them in.

The first 8 books I read so far

An Apprenticeship or thee Book of Pleasures by Clarice Lispeector

6*

On obsessive love

In this book we follow Clarice, a woman who is trying to bridge the gap between her loneliness and the passion she. harbors for Ulisses, who takes it upon himself to guide her through that path.

This book made me develop an alter ego. It made me kill my old self and create a sexier one out of it. I didn’t plunge into this genre willingly, the interest was sparked by the character portrayal in this book, I was so amused by it that I started seeking more books with similarities to this, from the way the book made me imagine Clarice, to the intense feelings and the way they’re depicted, to the progression of these feelings towards the end, all of this had me hooked and already thinking of what I want my next read to be like (and what I want my next outfit to look like).

My Husband by Maud Ventura

4*

On obsessive & controlling love

A tale of a wife too engulfed by her love for her husband to the point where she doesn’t have more to give to her own kids. The main character loves her husband, a little too much, the cup overflows a little bit and seeps through into her sanity. She keeps notes detailing her husband’s whereabouts, she has a separate notebook where she writes down his “hurtful actions” and the punishment she would give him for each. She’s not exactly the perfect wife otherwise either, with her own shortcomings and her own mishaps, but she still attributes them all to how much she loves him. This gets good when we read the Epilogue.

I was feeling for her the entire time, I didn’t know if I should feel seen or called out because almost the entire time my main thought was “I should probably not love someone ever, because this is how much I’ll love them, to the point where my OCD will push me off the edge”. This book was the first one I read where obsession is a main theme, and it has led me to the rest of the titles in this list.

Read this if you’re interested in these themes: flawed people, detrimental relationships, obsession, unhinged characters. Most importantly read this if you’re okay with books were no one is a good guy, no morals here just obsessive vibes.

New Animal by Ella Baxter

3*

On obsessive grief

Amelia is a cosmetician, at her family’s mortuary. Amelia loses her mom. Amelia goes into a haunting metaphorical journey and a quite literal one to escape that grief. But in her mind that is her way of grieving.

This may not have been a good choice for me to read but only because BDSM is not really an area for me to look into. The book otherwise had a depth that goes beyond it’s main plot. We see parent-children relationships being dissected in a way only all of us would relate to, especially the part where Amelia needs one parent when she’s away from them but she couldn’t stand whichever one she’s around, aren’t we all a little like that?

This book also discusses grief and goes in depth in how it engulfs you within it, so a trigger warning here if you can’t handle this because it does go deep about it. It also details the escapist ways people turn to to escape their grief.

This may not exactly deal with obsession, but I wanted to add it to the list anyway because of the familial attachment aspect and how that itself can be a form of anxious obsession laying dormant in most if not all of us

Acts of Desperation by Megan Nolan

6*

On obsessive love

Our main character is unnamed, perhaps on purpose. She falls into obsessive love with Cieran, the type of obsessive love where you lose yourself completely into the other person, unknowingly but willingly giving them a hold over you that you can’t escape by the time you notice it.

This is a narrative of the rejection that is breed within a person when the other is obsessed with them, and it is also a narrative of the obsession wee develop with someone when they reject us. It is a big mess of overflowing emotions and how nothing that intense is ever gratified. It encapsulates the disappointing reality of obsession.

My best recommendation on this entire list. I wish I started with it and I wish I ended with it, but it happened to be a little in the middle, fueling me to search for more books that will hopefully match up to the quality and realistic portrayal of obsession this one has. No other book has done it so far, except thee first book maybe.

I’ve seen some contradicting opinions about the ending though, and without any spoilers, I think it was rather realistic and was merely hated because of how it was out of character for those who relate to our unnamed character’s behavior through out the rest of the book.

Wilful Disregard by Lena Andersson

2*

On obsessive love

If I’m being honest, this one blended in with others in my mind and I had to go back and remember the plot.

Our main character, Ester, is a rational woman with a steady career and a steady relationship, or so she thought, until she experienced what the depths of love feel like after she wrote a piece on Hugo Rask.

Would you rather be in an all encapsulating obsessive love with all of its falls, or in a healthy boring relationship devoid of any feelings? This is my most memorable part about reading in this book and it wasn’t really the focus of it. But I think of this often and of whether or not a combination of both is ever attainable. For someone with OOCD or any personality disorder, they mess up the way we feel, display, or even. receive love. And so we wonder if there is ever a happy ending to our undying devotion and borderline unhealthy way of feeling love. It takes over us to the point where good feelings mesh with guilt and shame and a feeling of doom, that it will never be satisfied, and has it ever? Or have we simply gotten bored and moved on to the next obsession because without it, love doesn’t feel real, its not love if it doesn’t completely drown us?

My Dark Vanessa by Kate Elizabeth Russell

5*

On predatory obsessions

In this book we follow Vanessa’s journey, alternating between the past and the present, slowly unraveling to us what happened to her when she was fifteen, her story is uncovered to us simultaneously as she slowly starts to realize the abuse and grooming that she has gone. through. We know it from the start but she doesn’t, she finishes the book along with us although her realization comes later than ours.

There is obsessive love, and then there is predatory obsession (for lack of a better term), and while the latter is in no way related to the types of obsession a normal person would have, but I think it is important to read this book.

Lolita has grown up and is experiencing the realization of what had really happened to her. And it is a tale all too familiar with too many women, even if we were to disregard any age restrictions from it. Too many women have experienced something, that no matter how obviously traumatizing it was, they were still never sure if it was really a bad experience or just a normal thing that happens to all women at some point. Until the day comes when they can’t deny it anymore.

Vanessa does not fit the checklist of what the perfect victim should be like in order to gain the support of the people and to be believed. Vanessa is human. That aspect of this narrative and specifically the flaws of Vanessa are the most important part of the book to me, and what makes it an. necessary read especially for those who don’t believe women. Those who scramble to find a flaw so they can finally find a reason to hate a woman, to unleash all their loathing and have a “reason” for it.

Cursed Bread by Sophie Mackintosh

3*

On obsessive fantasies

You will never guess what is the historic event that served as a launchpad to this novel. But the book has nothing to do with it really, it is just a spin on one possible storyline happening within that event.

Elodie is a baker’s wife who feels so unloved by her husband that when. she is introduced to a new couple, she develops an obsession with the both of them. Does she want to be with them? does she want to embody them? perhaps both. We follow her as she peers into their life, slowly seeping into their daily activities and the way with which their obsession with each other is displayed. She. has no clue how they portray her though, not even when she thinks she does.

I’m trying to have have opinions on this book but I cannot come up with a single one, it was simply an enjoyable read especially because of how peculiar its base story is.

I’m a Fan by Sheena Patel

4*

On an obsession with a parasocial relationship

I’m giving this 4 stars overall because of the themes discussed in this book, ranging from racism to classicism and much more. But I’d give the obsession part 2.5 stars if I’m being real.

The characters in this novel are unnamed, our main character is obsessed with “the man she wants to be with”, who in turn is obsessed with “the woman she’s obsessed with” despite being in a healthy relationship with “her boyfriend” who loves her dearly. She is pushed to the limit because of her obsession. She has a complete disregard to the people in her life and her life’s focus and purpose is to be with the man she wants to be with, as is thee case with most obsessive feelings.

Just like most obsessive feelings, we see glimpses of the unsatisfied craving all over the novel despite the main character being completely oblivious with them, another realistic portrayal of the futility of obsession. You are completely enamored with something or someone, but there’s no happiness when you finally get it. You might obsess over more and more and more. Or you might move on to another obsession that proves this feeling is only folded over itself and is never about the person or thing you direct it to. Or worse, you might get disappointed and plunged into the emptiness of the mundane. What did we think the happy ending of obsession would be anyway?

I inhaled these books all back to back so fast that the more mediocre ones of them became kind of a blur at this point and I had to go back and remind myself of what they were about, so I hope my reviews were not lacking because of this. But some of them were so good they still take a seat at the front of my mind and I compare every similar book to them.

I hope they spark your interest and I’d love to discuss them with you.

If you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading ❤