#Queer stereotypes

[the-bar-sinister]

I wasn't going to say anything, because I don't want to upset anyone, and I believe that everyone has the right to their own opinions and headcanons, queer or otherwise. 

But at this point it's unavoidable.

The sheer prevalence of the "trans Apollo Justice" headcanon trend, and the way in which some of the fandom treat the idea and interact it with it is uncomfortable.

Speaking as a trans man, the way I see Apollo Justice presented in fandom as trans is deeply uncomfortable.

It's uncomfortable because the "evidence" people use for this headcanon is all deeply emasculating stereotypes about trans men, and reflective of the insecurities that trans men have. 

Saying that "Apollo could be trans" because he's short, small, unconfident, and has to work hard to be loud and be heard is reflective of negative stereotypes of trans men that many trans men feel uncomfortable, ashamed and like they'll never be seen as men.

Likewise, a lot of the way that people talk casually about trans Apollo Justice is anything but affirming of his masculinity. It's again emasculating– it's humiliating. It's all uwu soft bean, tboy swag, twink, so small so precious. It's not affirming of his gender.

There are 355 works on AO3 tagged with "trans apollo justice". Out of those works, 155– fully half of them– are tagged as explicit. They're about, or contain, explicit sex. This is not a bad thing. 

However, a quick glance at the last 2 pages or so "trans apollo justice" fics? They're all "vaginal sex" "breeding", "breast fucking", "cunnilingus".

I'm not one to cry "fetishization" but this feels like fetishization. 

Do you think I could find a fic where Apollo uses a strap on someone else if I tried? 

This doesn't feel gender affirming. 

This feels uncomfortable.

And I raise this point not to yuck anyone's yum. 

But it's becoming unavoidable. I have the tag "trans apollo justice" blocked on tumblr, and I still see uncomfortable posts about it because people don't tag it.

I'm not saying anyone has to stop headcanoning Apollo as trans.

But I hope you'll take another look at why you feel that way, how you're talking about Apollo and his masculinity, and why all of that might make some trans men uncomfortable.

[mrcarmenile]

i’m constantly afraid that i’m exactly what people think queer people like me are. i’m worried that people think my only personality trait is that i’m part of the alphabet mafia or something and that im shoving it down everyone’s throats

i’m not. i’m really not, but sometimes if i so much as mention that i’m gay or have “they” as a part of my pronoun set around cishet people, i feel like i’m fucking indoctrinating the children or whatever the fuck

it’s fucking awful how ashamed people make me feel for being queer sometimes. ME. i’m so proud of and comfortable in my identity and yet, all that confidence can be stripped away in a matter of seconds

people underestimate homophobia and queer stereotypes, and how much they affect people. so many people think that it’s really not much of an issue anymore but it is. because if i’m being affected by it? me who lives in liberal washington with my progressive parents and my easy ass privileged ass life?? me who loves being gay and queerness and all that good shit??? then clearly the problem is not even close to being solved

[rjalker]

"any man who works in the tech industry is actually secretly a trans woman in disguise" is not the progressive fucking statement you think it is. What is wrong with you people. why do you think stereotyping people is magically okay as long as you're the one doing it. Bigotry doesn't stop being bigotry when you do it. It just means you're a fucking bigot.

[oldtvandcomics]

Random thought, but do you know how "villain because queerness" is a prevalent trope with every letter of the LGBTQ+ umbrella? Has anyone ever tried to put them together, and see what the difference would be?

So, like, a villainous gay, a transgender mass murderer and an aroace criminal mastermind all have their queerness linked to them being evil, but they are still very different character archetypes. Has anyone ever really tried to explore that?

[beeesworld]

I'm a gay woman. Everything means something to us. There's no comment (that) you can't overanalyze. There's no gesture (that) you can't dissect. There's no glance (that) you can't read too much into.

Britt

[therealarrogantbastard]

Is it a stereotype than when drinking out of a mug, queer people will hold the mug by the non-handle side of the mug?

Because if it’s not, i feel it should be😅

[im-fruity-and-bored]

Hi! I have a goofy little request :]

Can y'all give me some of your favorite silly queer stereotypes for different sexualities? Or just queer people in general? (not harmful stereotypes, just stuff like “gay people like frogs,” or “bi people do finger guns,” WHICH HAS PROOF- I have a picture of my sister when she was like 3, inadvertently doing finger guns. She came out as bi like 3 years later I think- lmao, or “ace people like garlic bread and cake and are secretly dragons that crave world domination-” which is… obviously false- me? A dragon in disguise? Whatever made you think that? [nervously munches garlic bread])

But yeah goofy stuff like that. It's for a little craft for my close friends/some members of my chosen family. When I finish said craft, I will probably show pictures and see if y'all want digital versions 🙃

WARNING FOR A WHOLE ESSAY TO THOSE THAT SENT ART REQUESTS

TLDR;I'm working on the art requests. Please have a little patience, and blame my friend for being a kind, considerate, caring person, and a good friend, for me not working on requests sooner.

(Also- speaking of requests, please trust that I AM working on yall’s art requests. Don't give up on me please- and if I haven't responded to your ask, it's because I plan to respond with the art itself 😅 I know it may seem like ‘oh she's working on other projects- what about my ask?’ And that is a reasonable concern, because I am a MASTER procrastinator. I will get to drawing your stuff though! I know I’m personally very impatient so I'll try not to keep y'all waiting too long. I was stressing about it the other day- “oh I have so many things to draw for people- oh god-” and my friend was trying to reassure me not to stress myself out about it- all “they can be patient.” So instead of pushing myself to do things, I ended up scrolling through my feed, spending almost a whole day in my bed reading fanfiction, starting a silly little fic (which I won't share the plot of in case I don't finish it, but I might post here later-) and watching the new Hazbin Hotel episodes, and watching Darly Boxman for the first time. So yeah blame my friend for being a sweet, caring, and reassuring person lmfao-)

[curioushabitforarivergod]

honestly more shows need to adopt the torchwood "everyone is awful and problematic and everyone is bisexual" route. life would be infinitely better

[deancasforcutie]

"Now you live in a secret bunker with an angel and Lucifer’s kid", AKA queering domesticity par excellence

[redditreceipts]

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskLGBT/s/T2Q5yURfiL

😐

"Hey guys, I'm a woman only attracted to other women. What do you call that?" (Needless to say, the people in the comments called her transphobic for assuming that people with female bodies don't have penises lmao)

[the-bar-sinister]

I get what you're saying but could it be that the reason it's mostly explicit fics tagged as trans Apollo is because that's when it's "relevant"

Like, a general fic of Apollo going out to get ice cream could feature either cis or trans Apollo but the fic is just about the guy living his life. So it wouldn't necessarily need to be tagged as trans Apollo Justice hes just existing

That is absolutely true, anon, but it's also true that of the explicit fics which are tagged with trans apollo justice 94% of them have him bottoming and 68% involve and feminine language for his genitals, and a full 15% are explicitly breeding kink.

Kink is not bad! Smut is not bad! Kink about trans people is not bad!

An overwhelming majority of trans Apollo sex fanfiction leaning into uncomfortable stereotypes and tropes is something that we should examine why it's happening.

context link

[shalom-iamcominghome]

"We need more diverse queer representation!"

You cannot even handle queer jews.

[rjalker]

if you can't deal with or acknowledge the exorsexist stereotypes that go into your favorite nonbinary characters then IDK what to tell you. That's a personal problem. But it absolutely does not give you the right to pretend those exorsexist stereotypes aren't there, or turn around and say the people pointing out the exorsexism are the real bigots.

That's no longer just you liking a character, you're now actively upholding the exorsexism that's already in place, by not just refusing to talk about it, not just ignoring the people pointing it out, you're now actively demonizing the people who are calling out the exorsexism.

And that's fucking exorsexist. Yes, even if you are also nonbinary. You do not get to weaponize your nonbinary identity to demonize and silence nonbinary people who actually put the work in to recognize and criticize exorsexism.

You either need to learn to recognize the bigotry in your favorite characters, or at least do everyone a favor and keep your bigotry to yourself.

Stop making it everyone else's problem that you think exorsexism shouldn't be criticized if you personally enjoy it. No, the people putting in the hard work to talk about it are not "the real exorsexists". You are.

[canichangemyblogname]

You know you don’t have to make up non-textual reasons to dislike a character, right? You can just dislike the character just because. And you also realize that if there are textual reasons you dislike the character—like the character’s past or lack of on-screen time—you don’t have to make up more reasons to dislike said character, right? You can just leave it at, “I dislike him because of his past and I don’t think the show has developed him enough.”

You don’t have to write a meta about how you dislike a character, with your reasoning being “he’s a predator” and your evidence being “because gay men cheat and fail to use prophylactic measures” or “because he has a 10-year age gap with his 34 y/o boyfriend” or “because a teenager said he’s cool” or “because gay men aren’t actually gay; they’re bi and lie” or “because Buck is a hot young thang™️, and gay men only sleep around” or “Buck’s feelings were too ambiguous before he understood he liked men and Tommy forced himself on Buck.” Because then you’re no longer relying on textual evidence; you’re relying on homophobic stereotypes to justify your fanon interpretation of a gay character. And then you’re proceeding to “joke” about violently killing this fictional man because of these stereotypes.

THAT is the issue people are having. They don’t give a fuck you dislike Tommy; they care that you’re using real-life queerphobic stereotypes, tropes, and jokes to justify disliking him.

[biteofboredom]

Stop telling trans people they're being sexist/perpetuating gender stereotypes when they mourn not having typical experiences of the gender they identify with.

I want a group of guy friends to consider me 'one of the boys', a dad who calls me 'son' and watches the grand prix with me, a brother who I could play football with in the park.

I wish I was raised doing sports and with action figures and comic books rather than socialised with toy kitchens and dresses and pushed to thrive only in academics.

But if I tell anyone that I get told I'm being misogynist. And I get it, gender roles & stereotypes are a problem, but that doesn't change the feelings and experiences that trans people have had or missed out on.

Not having these typical 'boy' experiences as a kid makes me feel separate from other guys. It forces me to stand out as different because I can't relate to them, and that is a painful feeling. Don't make it an invalid one too.

[catboybiologist]

Do you now, or have you ever, called yourself a femboy?

Curious about something. The initial craze over the exact femboy aesthetic seemed to mostly be from 2019-2023 or so, and is much calmer now. For one, it does seem like it increased the overall, casual acceptance of cis gender nonconformity, but also helped a lot of people discover their own trans identities, whether they were transfemme, nonbinary, or transmascs finding new ways to relate to femininity. Obviously femboys aren't "dead", but they're not the same level of novelty that they were a few years ago.

This is going to be a very, very loose poll, and I know it won't cover every situation. I'm also sorry for making over generalizations! It's difficult to cover every situation. But feel free to let me know your own personal relationship with the term in reblogs and replies!

If these options are confusing, let me know! For example, I would choose "binary transfemme, stopped using the term when I realized I was trans"

Obviously if your experience doesn't cleanly fit in, I would like the best approximation! Eg, if there was a period of time where you used the term post transition, but gradually grew uncomfortable with it, you could choose the same option as me.