#Parenting Styles

[saiyanmazen]

Parenting styles in Dragon Ball Z (and Super)

You know, to me, the interesting thing about this scene (and the one where they could to the aforementioned park) isn't the fact that Vegeta keeps his promise.

It's the fact that he uses positive reinforcement to motivate Trunks.

Do you think Vegeta was ever rewarded for landing a good hit? Definitely not. It was expected of him.

As an expert in children's development, I find it fascinating to look at this example of Vegeta parenting Trunks and what it says about his parenting style. I've seen headcanons that go from calling 'Dadgeta' authoritarian to neglectful, but I disagree.

In the following, I will briefly describe the four styles of parenting with focus on the authoritarian and the authoritative styles. I'll also compare them to how DBZ parents appear to raise their children, but mainly focus on Vegeta.

Authoritarian:

This is the old school parenting method where restrictions and punishments go hand in hand. The parents expect the children to obey rules without a clear explanation as to why and corporal punishment is used when the children overstep.

Unsurprisingly, it seems like a lot of people believe this is how Vegeta raises his children (If he is even involved; I'll address this later on.) It was likely how he was raised.

However, the only parent we actually see using this style is Chichi. She's not entirely unreasonable, but we do see her expect things from Gohan without explanations and she has a lot of restrictions set up. This might have something to do with Goku's parenting style, but more on that later.

Piccolo also uses authoritarianism with Gohan, but he isn't trying to parent him, just train him.

What's really interesting is that children raised in a household practicing authoritarianism tend to hold a lot of anger inside. They also have low self-efficacy and high self blame. Remind you of someone?

Indulgent

Here we see nurturing, accepting parents who don't have behavioral expectations of their children. They are responsive to the children's needs and wishes, but do not expect them to be the same toward other people. The parents want to be the child's friend rather than a demanding parent.

Children of indulgent parents tend to grow up without a sense of others' boundaries and generally have less discipline than their peers. They lack impulse control and are often irresponsible.

In DBZ we do see signs of this parenting style, but only limited. It's not commonly used in Asia and therefore, Toriyama didn't add it. In GT it's obvious that both Trunks and Bulla seem have been parenting this way by Bulma. It's also why many doubt that Vegeta has been much involved.

It's also easy to argue that Goku parents this way, although it's up for discussion.

Neglectful

Although many think that the indulgent parenting style have created a generation of undisciplined young people, the neglectful parenting style has actually had a greater effect.

The parents are either more interested in themselves and their own goals than their children's. (Although sometimes it's because the parents struggle with stress or depression) Children of these parents are usually lonely and melancholic, often have very low self esteem and are needy after affection and approval. This leads them to be easily manipulated and they are at a higher risk to end up in abusive relationships.

I think many of the Vegeta antis and those claiming Goku is a bad parent would place the two Saiyans here.

However, Goku is clearly involved in Gohan's upbringing, albeit choosing a more casual approach than Chichi, and returns after being dead for seven years, ready to be involved with Goten (and Gohan if he wants it). The reason that Goku mainly focuses on training isn't just because it's his own interest. It's what he knows for sure how to do.

Most importantly: it was how Goku was raised himself. First by Grandpa Gohan and later from his other father figure, Master Roshi. It isn't just in his blood; it's in his upbringing.

And then there's Vegeta’s parenting style which was my main focus for this post. It got a little out of control, but we have finally arrived at the last parenting style:

Authoritative

This is the most modern parenting style, even though it isn't really new. It's been used for years in well functioning familes. This type of parent is both demanding and nurturing, being present and engaged in their children's lives. They explain things to their children, teach them how to regulate their feelings and therefore expect a mature behavior from them.

Children of authoritative parents tend to be more successful in their adult lives, capable of discipline and well-liked. Because they aren't constantly being restricted, they naturally develope autonomy within set boundaries and learn to respect others, regardless of authority.

So, what does this have to do with Vegeta and Trunks?

As I mentioned in the beginning, in the scene in the Gravity Chamber, Vegeta uses positive reinforcement to motive Trunks. Positive reinforcement has proven to be a healthy way to motivate children (and animals) and is a part of the authoritative style. By using it, Vegeta provides Trunks with rules that foster motivation and discipline in the child. The fact that Vegeta knows about the amusement and can use it as an incentive also shows that he is involved enough to know what may get Trunks to do his best.

But the most important thing we see is that Vegeta upholds his promise, despite hating every second of it. It shows that he respects Trunks' efforts and achievement. By honoring his word, he also teaches Trunks to do the same.

Of course, this is a small scene and we don't know how Vegeta behaves otherwise in regards to Trunks. But it's safe to say that Vegeta does take his son's wishes into account and uses it to encourage him to move beyond his limits.

I admit that I'm not a fan of GT and don't consider it canon, especially because of Toriyama's lack of involvement. So, while I dislike many aspects of DBS, I do think it's the best representation of the characters.

In Super, both Goten and Trunks are well adjusted boys who both have discipline and test the boundaries of their autonomy. They act like boys their age, albeit with incredibly strength, and it goes to show that their parents have raised them well.

Of course, it's also important to remember that both DBZ and DBS (and even GT) are a product of their time and the parenting styles reflect that. DBZ is from the 80's where the authoritarian (Chichi) and indulgent (Goku) styles were the most common. GT is from the 90's where the media started to focus on indulgent and neglectful parents - even though it wasn't a new thing - and it's shown that Trunks, Bulla and Goten have grown up as spoiled and undisciplined. DBS shows that the parents in the show have become authoritative and their children's behavior reflects that.

It's clear that the parents are doing their best and that the fathers have become more involved nowadays than before. This is the case in modern parenting as well.

Anyway, this is the end of my long rant. I think, as both an expert in children's development and as a parent myself, it's interesting to look into the relationships between the characters, especially the father-son interactions which are explored the most. There's no doubt that Toriyama knew the importance of being a father and wanted to portray it, mainly in Goku and Gohan's relationship.

I don't think Toriyama saw Goku nor Vegeta as bad fathers, but he knew that everyone has different strengths, even in parenthood.

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Writing Notes: Parenting Styles

What can parents do to nurture a healthy self-concept?

Diana Baumrind (1971, 1991) thinks parenting style may be a factor.

The way we parent is an important factor in a child’s socioemotional growth.

Baumrind developed and refined a theory describing parenting styles based on 2 aspects of parenting that are found to be extremely important:

Parental responsiveness, which refers to the degree the parent responds to the child’s needs.

Parental demandingness, is the extent to which the parent expects more mature and responsible behavior from a child.

Using these two dimensions, she recognized 3 different parenting styles:

Authoritarian (Too Hard)

The authoritarian parenting style is characterized by high demandingness with low responsiveness.

The authoritarian parent is rigid, harsh, and demanding.

Abusive parents usually fall in this category (although Baumrind is careful to emphasize that not all authoritarian parents are abusive).

Permissive (Too Soft)

This parenting style is characterized by low demandingness with high responsiveness.

The permissive parent is overly responsive to the child’s demands, seldom enforcing consistent rules.

The “spoiled” child often has permissive parents.

Authoritative (Just Right)

This parenting style is characterized by high demandingness with huge responsiveness.

The authoritative parent is firm but not rigid, willing to make an exception when the situation warrants.

The authoritative parent is responsive to the child’s needs but not indulgent.

Baumrind makes it clear that she favors the authoritative style.

Comparison of 4 parenting styles

PARENTING STYLES & CULTURE

Authoritative Style

Of the 4 parenting styles, the authoritative style is the one that is most encouraged in modern American society.

American children raised by authoritative parents tend to have high self-esteem and social skills; however, effective parenting styles vary as a function of culture and, as Small (1999) points out, the authoritative style is NOT necessarily preferred or appropriate in all cultures.

Authoritarian Style

In contrast to the authoritative style, authoritarian parents probably would not relax bedtime rules during a vacation because they consider the rules to be set, and they expect obedience:

This style can create anxious, withdrawn, and unhappy kids.

It is important to point out that authoritarian parenting is as beneficial as the authoritative style in some ethnic groups (Russell, Crockett, & Chao, 2010).

Example: First-generation Chinese American children raised by authoritarian parents did just as well in school as their peers who were raised by authoritative parents (Russell et al., 2010).

Permissive Style

Not surprisingly, children raised by permissive parents tend to lack self-discipline, and the permissive parenting style is negatively associated with grades (Dornbusch, Ritter, Leiderman, Roberts, & Fraleigh, 1987).

The permissive style may also contribute to other risky behaviors such as alcohol abuse (Bahr & Hoffman, 2010), risky sexual behavior especially among female children (Donenberg, Wilson, Emerson, & Bryant, 2002), and increased display of disruptive behaviors by male children (Parent et al., 2011).

There are some positive outcomes associated with children raised by permissive parents. They tend to have higher self- esteem, better social skills, and report lower levels of depression (Darling, 1999).

Source ⚜ Writing Notes & References

[diabolicflame93]

Set Up for Failure / Authoritarian Parenting

Lately I’ve been mulling over the thought or concept of how fundie families set their children up for failure. I can’t speak to a wider or societal understanding of the concept, but I can speak to my own experiences. Much of my criticism comes from how children in fundamentalism are instructed to deal with authority figures. More specifically, how children are taught blind obedience to authority…

[undead-knick-knack]

It is still very funny to me that Sam watched this show with his kids

[dionte-goethe]

Alright, just for funsies, lemme talk about parenting styles and the Jiangs!

Let me start with disclaimers. This is more novel based because that's the easiest version for me to sift through and it's the base behind the donghua and live action. I like JC and WWX, but in the general perception of the fandom, that will look like I’m saying JC is perfect and could do no wrong because I’m not using rumors as evidence nor do I believe his actions made under duress or high stress situations reflects his normal behavior. It may also sound like I am critical of WWX because I don’t consider him perfect. Which… yeah. I like him, and that can coexist with being critical of his behavior and worried about his mental space. Bringing negativity to this post because I was too harsh towards a character or not harsh enough towards one will probably result in a block. I don’t want to engage in negativity, the world has enough of it already. (also that is why this is massively undertagged) I am not Chinese, nor Asian, so there may be cultural aspects at play that I do not understand. And lastly, please bear in mind I’m not a professional, though I did a lot of research on parenting styles… for character analysis, actually, lmao. Yes, I bought a handbook of child psychology for the fun of looking at characters through that lens around a decade ago, I’m an adult with adult money.

If you're okay with all that, let's go!

Anyway, let’s start with the basics. There are three types of parenting styles established by Baumrind- authoritative, authoritarian, and permissive/indulgent, and a fourth style by Maccoby and Martin- disengaged/indifferent.

"Authoritative parents are warm, firm, and accepting of… individuality. Parents who are very demanding but not responsive are labeled authoritarian. Authoritarian parents place a high value on obedience and conformity and tend to favor more punitive, absolute, and forceful disciplinary measures… A parent who is very responsive but not at all demanding is indulgent… Indulgent parents place relatively few demands on the child’s behavior, giving the child a high degree of freedom to act as she or he wishes. Parents who are neither demanding nor responsive are labeled indifferent. Indifferent parents minimize the time and energy they must devote to interacting with their child. In extreme cases, indifferent parents may be neglectful. pg 1017"

Make sense? We're working on a two part scale, of how much the parents "demand" of their children, and how "responsive" they are towards their children. So let’s talk about the effects that the different parenting styles have on the child! Here's another quote.

“Adolescents from authoritative homes are relatively more responsible, more self-assured, more adaptive, more creative, more curious, more socially skilled, and more successful in school. In contrast, adolescents from authoritarian homes are more dependent, more passive, less socially adept, less self-assured, and less intellectually curious; those from indulgent households are often less mature, more irresponsible, more conforming to their peers, and less able to assume positions of leadership; and those reared in indifferent homes are disproportionately impulsive and more likely to be involved in delinquent behavior and in precocious experiments with sex, drugs, and alcohol. pg 1018”

I want to also mention that authoritative parenting is especially important for developing competence in sons, and authoritarian parenting is more detrimental long term for boys than girls.

It goes on to talk about neglectful and abusive parenting, which disproportionately causes problems in mental health and development. Physical abuse can cause aggression toward others, and mental abuse (such as excessive criticism, rejection, and emotional harshness) is also linked to bad outcomes. (ok, it says “the most deleterious outcomes” but that tells me nothing. Like, yes, that’s bad, but what flavor of bad?? Just "unexpected harmful outcomes"???)

So in regards to psychosocial growth and development, highly constraining (authoritarian) parents may cause their growing children difficulty in individuating, leading to depression, anxiety and diminished social competence. On the other hand, adolescents who are granted autonomy but who feel distant or detached from their parents (indulgent/indifferent) tend to struggle psychologically adjusting.

(I should also mention, a lot of research on this was done in an American context. That being said, they did look into ethnic variations within that context, and- to summarize- the authoritarian parenting style generally has less negative effects on youths of color. Just less, not none. Authoritative still has the most positive effects across ethnicities!)

Now, let’s mention unfair treatment! It can cause depression and antisocial behavior, and in general, as youths get older they may understand and appreciate the differences in how their parents treat different children, however, a strain in sibling relationships appears when those differences are perceived as unfair.

The last thing I want to mention before applying these to the Jiang family ft. WWX is the effect marital quality has on children. Frequent intense or violent marital conflict may cause a child to have trouble internalizing and externalizing their problems. Conflict related to the children may cause the child to feel greater shame, responsibility, self-blame, and fear of being drawn into the conflict. And exposure to unresolved conflict is associated with poor coping responses- and if the conflict was resolved… not ideally, it would also affect the child. A hostile resolution can influence a child to exhibit antisocial behavior, and what I personally call a freezing resolution (think emotionally distant, or resolving by ignoring) would influence a child to be more anxious and withdrawn.

Now that we have all those different aspects of parenting covered, let’s look at the Jiang family, ft. WWX. I do think there is some added complication as Yu Ziyuan and Jiang Fengmian pretty much never present a united front in parenting their children. There’s a reason I brought up conflict earlier. YZY is the primary one rearing the children, imo, and is solidly authoritarian. When JFM gets involved, I would say he generally slides between indulgent and indifferent.

With that being said, let’s start with the most complicated child in this equation, Wei Wuxian! As a quick aside, there isn’t a parenting style for orphans… for obvious reasons. When I initially did research on this subject, (probably like… a decade ago) I couldn’t find a lot of documentation on the psychological/sociological effect NO parents has on a child’s development. (A lot of why I got the book was because I couldn’t find thoroughly explained research on parenting styles at the time— and the book still mentions nothing on orphans. At least not in the volume I have.) It’s safe to say he has trauma— as stated canon and as a psychological “because he was orphaned,” but the trends and effects of that are that are not something I can speak to.

Keeping the fact that JFM and YZY are NOT WWX's parents in mind, I do think between them, WWX ends up being reared under an authoritative style or something close to it. His biological parents strike me as authoritative, if… on the less demanding side. Based on vibes. Not super scientific, I know. And while I don’t consider YZY to fill a guardian role to WWX after he is brought into Lotus Pier, she does fill a disciplinary (or demanding) role that JFM does not.

In regards to abuse... given the context of being in a cultivation setting and the book says, “While Madam Yu always pelted him with harsh words, she’d never really hit him hard before— two or three lashes at most, or being made to kneel or confined indoors, and it never took long for Jiang Fengmian to release him from that.” Which implies “hitting” is part of punishment. (side note that hitting/lashing/etc as a punishment style is pretty universally psychologically considered bad for kids. this is old chinese fantasy land, so y'know, that sort of punishment is expected by genre. I'm not gonna examine it with a modern lens) And given the other clans’ punishments, hers seem... average. We only really see the Lan, but it seems less than theirs. Going off the super scientific basis of vibes, I suspect her punishments were probably greater than the Jin. Maybe on par with the Nie and and less than the Wen? Hard to tell for sure. The Zidian whipping was done under threat, so I don't really count that. (and she refused to do permanent harm.) But there was a lot of verbal harshness, and she definitely didn't like WWX. I think the donghua and live action may have… intensified her physicality. For JFM, while others may say that he is authoritative by himself, from my reading and understanding of his actions, he tends to bail WWX out of trouble with pretty much no consequence, so he strikes me as indulgent (responsive but not demanding). I think it would be generous, given his overall actions, to say he’s authoritative.

Next I’ll mention Jiang Yanli, though it’s difficult for me to nail the exact styles her parents give her, provided how little the narrative really focuses on her and her parents' relationship. I do think JYL fares the best under YZY, both just in canon compared to her brothers, and with the authoritarian style being less detrimental for girls.  YZY’s abusive words seem toned down for JYL as well, but I think she is still pretty harsh towards her. (Let the girl peel lotus seeds for her brothers if she wants!) For JFM, I’d say he is indulgent or indifferent. I do believe he isn’t completely inattentive towards her, but YZY seems more involved in her life, and the only thing that JFM really does regarding her is to cancel her marriage… without the approval of her or YZY. Maybe the disregard is to be expected from the setting, but it is still disregard. Again, we could be generous and say he’s authoritative, but we could also say he’s straight up indifferent (no demand, no response) compared to his treatment of WWX.

Now Jiang Cheng. Who really gets the worst of both worlds here. YZY is her authoritarian self, with the added factor of that style being worse for boys. JFM is indifferent. Before you say, “oh, but JFM tried to parent JC, it’s mentioned in his childhood flashback and he calls JC out about being too harsh on WWX”... Number one, the indifferent parenting style isn't complete absence. Further delving into the definition, it is

“... motivated to do whatever is necessary to minimize the costs in time and effort of interaction with the child. Such parents are motivated to keep the child at a distance and focus on their own needs rather than the needs of the child. They are parent centered rather than child centered. pg 437”

Now, it is mentioned in MDZS that “Jiang Cheng took after his mother in looks and likeness, which had never been to Jiang Fengmian’s liking. He had tried to educate Jiang Cheng in a myriad of ways, but it had all been for naught. This was why it always appeared as though he didn’t favor his son.” Whether this is the omniscient and unbiased narration, or omniscient WWX pov narration is… unclear. But when JFM moved WWX into JC’s room, it was because HE (JFM) wanted them to get along. Before or while JC was reluctantly agreeing, he picked up WWX, startling and causing JC to act out because “Jiang Cheng could count the number of times Jiang Fengmian had ever picked him up on the fingers of one hand.” Between trying to force JC to have a different "likeness" and to have certain relationships, I would say that JFM is much more self focused than child focused. It feels like he's trying to make JC himself and is disappointed that JC isn't because then how is he supposed to live vicariously through him? Subtle bad parenting is so much worse than obvious bad parenting to me. Because with subtle bad parenting, you get the gaslighting and the need to deconstruct how much it fucked you up because "well, they didn't hit me or yell at me". Or maybe, oh they showed an ounce of care, like that covers YEARS of indifference.

Something I didn’t mention earlier is how the attitudes of children and adults will also feed into each other. If a parent feels badly towards a child, the child will feel worse towards that parent. Jiang Cheng thinks his father doesn’t like him. He is convinced of it, and while WWX tries the “he’s harder on you because you’re actually his son,” JC counters with “he doesn’t like my mother so he doesn’t like me,” which WWX does NOT deny.

I do think that JC and JYL were raised more by YZY thus they primarily exhibit behavior that shows the results of authoritarian parenting. JC does show some of the impulsivity of indifference, and while I want to say WWX shows some impulsivity and shall we say precocious experimentation (drinking and unique cultivation ideas) from an indifferent style, I’m torn between associating that with said parenting style or with his personality and past traumas.

This is probably obvious, but all the children are also affected by the marital conflict and their parents involving them in it. Everyone gets their focus, even JYL when her mother is arguing with JFM about dissolving the arranged marriage. But I do think JC is the real center of it— yes it’s about how JFM treats WWX compared to JC, but that’s the point. YZY doesn’t (literally and physically) drag WWX in to say stop paying attention to him, that’s counter to her point. She’s dragging JC in to say “pay more attention to him, this one is your biological son!” Is it any wonder that they don’t have the best conflict resolution/coping skills?

In general, the whole situation is uh… bad. But let’s get some happy!

JC became one of the parental guardians for JL, (sorry I didn’t read the section on the effect of co-parenting on a child, and this is already pretty lengthy and I’m kinda fading at this point) and if we look at his parenting style, I would say it is both demanding and responsive! That’s authoritative! Does he lean into demanding a bit more? Yeah, I'd say so. He sometimes doesn’t understand exactly what Jin Ling wants from him, and he can be overbearing, but he does seem willing to let go of JL when he needs to.

Some further points for his responsiveness is how Jin Guangyao states that “you (JC) dote on him (JL) the most of us all.” When JL starts crying after he has a bit of a falling out with the other juniors (due to them misunderstanding why he drew his sword) when WWX and LWJ were at a loss for what to do for him, JC called for him and didn’t disparage him for crying, instead asking who had bullied him. Moments later, JC prioritized comforting JL over his suspicion that WWX and LWJ had made him cry, “returning to the cabin with his arm around Jin Ling’s shoulders.”

In regards to abuse claims, that’s quite clearly… I don’t know, fanon misinterpretation? Maybe one of the versions adds more physicality factors? In the novels JL states, “You (WWX) actually hit me! Not even my uncle has hit me before!” after which JL clearly states to WWX that JC’s threats and punishments are “all talk.” JC pinches JL in an earlier scene, which is interpreted as a sort of childish punishment/affection system with the whole "stop pinching me I'm too old for that" and "I won't stop pinching you even when you're 30." The one time I can recall JC hitting JL (second siege of the burial mounds, after JL runs off to fight along the other juniors while JC’s core is sealed), it is in a high stress situation— one where JC may have been reliving his own trauma.

I could go on, but I just want to say… No one is born knowing how to be a parent. The biggest thing is that there is a decision to focus on a the child more than yourself. Surprisingly, since my initial watch/read of MDZS I find myself believing JFM struggled with that focus more than YZY. JC clearly focuses on JL with his own child-rearing style, and I think it's made clear throughout the novels just how much they care about each other. So I think that’s a win. There is a point where WWX says “Jiang Cheng doesn’t know how to raise kids at all” but that’s a pretty arrogant thing to say (which is in character for WWX, but still) when you’ve only “raised” a child as part of a community for a short amount of time.

tl;dr: YZY and JFM's parenting styles suck in opposite ways and they don't balance each other out. All their kids/fauxadopted kid do or would do better raising children when or if given the chance. so proud of them.

If you want some other little fun (or not so fun) facts, let me know! I wasn't able to cover everything.

*Quotes and information on parenting styles from: The Handbook of Child Psychology. Edited by Nancy Eisenberg, et al. 6th Edition, Volume 3: Social, Emotional, and Personality Development, John Wiley & Sons, 2006.

[salternateunreality2]

I’ve got to ask, because the video you linked in chapter 80 makes me think I’m right…

Are the firsts parenting styles based on Gwenna’s (pleasant peasant media) parenting videos? Cause I’m living for the comparison.

Great chapter btw. I really want to cuddle Kadaj!

Answering your question:

She definitely influences them. I like to think there's an FF7 Gwenna out there making content that Angeal watches religiously. He's right there, cocoa and dressing gown ready, for Every Video.

They all have their own styles and did their own research, but her basic concepts around respect for the kids and gentle parenting are things all the Dads keep in mind. They also bend towards those principles naturally for various reasons.

I didn't set out to make her influence the story, but since I watch her stuff, it's going to bleed over. (My other sources are watching parenting irl, reddit, other fics, that weird phase I had where I got super into adoption for a few years and read a million blogs and things, and my own experiences with kids.)

Excited rambling because I can't help myself:

Angeal is a big fan of Gwenna and gentle parenting. He's also a natural by nature and his experience with Zack. He's not the "fun" parent--he's probably the most strict about everyday and risky things alike. Bedtime is always at bedtime. No playing "yeet the baby as high as you can", even if the giggles are EPIC. Healthy food. Educational field trips.

Sometimes it can be hard for him to let himself or Cloud off the hook for crazy kid stuff, but especially himself, and he needs those reminders from her about taking a deep breath and remembering that it does work. Patience yields focus.

You don't have to and can't be perfect, but you can be the perfect Dad for your kid by loving him and trying your best. And sometimes your best is collapsing on the foldout couch holding onto the baby all night despite what the books say about sleep schedules because your baby needs you.

-

Genesis respects Cloud and treats him like a small adult because that's how Genesis expects to be treated (minus the small part. Genesis is tall. He is! He just has mammoth friends. Shut up). Genesis also doesn't want to helicopter/tiger mom his baby; he got enough of that growing up and he's over it.

He wants the world to take him seriously, so he offers that same courtesy to Cloud. He offers it to everyone unless they prove themselves to be unworthy, in which case Bitchesis comes out.

He's more likely to risk Cloud's physical and emotional health than Angeal, but less likely to risk Cloud's physical health than Sephiroth. He has no qualms about teaching Cloud the hard way about the ways of the world; if Cloud gets smart with him, he says "bet".

"I cursed at Heidegger because he's a bitch." is a perfectly rational response to Cloud asking why Papa cussed, in Genesis' mind.

-

Sephiroth strives to do The Opposite of what Hojo did to him, so he treats Cloud as a tiny but respected new recruit SOLDIER under his command. He strives for excellence from both himself and Cloud, but the instant he starts feeling too much like Hojo, he re-evaluates. He tends to be more risky with Cloud's physical safety, because when the bar is set to "don't make a 2yo fight a monster", letting a 4yo handle a weapon doesn't seem like a big deal.

He also feels inadequate and a little out of his depth emotionally with Cloud; to combat this, he regularly seeks advice from Tifa, Angeal, and Zack to understand Cloud and provide appropriate responses.

-

Zack is definitely one of the funnest dads. His philosophy is to meet Cloud where he's at. Both he and Genesis are great at engaging Cloud's imagination and playing with him, but Zack gets way more into it.

Zack gives Cloud freedom and respect because he's a kid and he deserves to have fun. As long as no one's getting seriously hurt, why the heck not?!

---

They all drive each other a little batty sometimes with their choices (see: the petting zoo incident + any and all motorcycle outings), but ultimately their main goals are: physical needs fully met, emotional needs fully met, then education and other things. They love their baby 🐥 and he loves them! ❤️🐱🐶🐻🦜🐥❤️

[floralcavern]

I’m at the doctor’s office and I just witnessed two types of parents react to their toddler throwing a fit:

Parent #1: *gives her a phone* (she does hold the phone for her, but she’s not actually trying to teach her proper ways to calm down)

Parent #2: *carrying toddler* Hey, we don’t act like that. *sets toddler down and gets on her level* We’re gonna have a good day, ok?

And this was, like, back to back. Right after each other.

[andresmounts2]

"Erm actually gentle parenting is just neglect"

Erm actually...it would kill you to do your own research instead of just regurgitating misinformed opinions.

[theexodvs]

I don’t know about you, but I will teach my daughters to sock boys who attempt to get handsy with them straight in the mouth.

[bonkersbon]

Random rants because I couldn't sleep all night

Insomnia is a bitch

But here it goes (and yes I'm sober just prob crazy🤔)

Teenagers are not TEENS 13 and Adults are not grown adults at 18

It is wild to me that this world expects so much from literal CHILDREN! children

They question why they are trialing kids are adults as early as 12 years old

Because they're making adult decisions and expected to as early as 13

Thirteen is not a damn teen

They're children and no one is treating them so

I used to get offended at the reference “it all starts at home” Or blaming the parents

It isn't 100 on the parents, let's face it! This world and social media now play a massive role in our children's minds and all the medications they're on for this or that

But the problem is the parenting and then society

We're an oxymoron

If you are raising your kids right then, at 13, they're still playing with Barbies and board games and monster trucks and making slime and playing hide and seek

That is what children do

And people are raising their kids so messed up that 12 year old ARE OUT COMMITTING crimes, having the deed and doing things they can't comprehend

They're combative and fight and get abusive with the officers and society as they do at home because of how they're being taught

They're skipping school and not knowing how to make decisions and then end up homeless

The statistics are all there, and history after history, people are repeating the same shit messing up their kids, and now the issue with kids is technology and being overstimulated

Take that technology away and see how long they can sit still

How many kids mimic everything they see

Idolization and profound misconception of what is socially acceptable or morally right. See it on TV. They mimic it

Even hurting others

There are so many hidden agendas everywhere you go

With what people sell wear and advertise

Ten year olds wearing makeup and not believing they are pretty how do they even know to talk like that or be like that

Their innocence is robbed, but parents can play a huge role

They slip away from you and grow up no matter how much you try to shelter or protect them

It'll happen

But a teen is not a teen, and an 18 isn't an adult

Protect your damn kids from this world

Raise them teach them and damn educate them

Protect them, shelter them, and do whatever you must as a parent to raise your kid to be a good kid! And a morally good one, too! Who helps others not be damn delulu babies and filled with weird jealousy and malice — always trying to compete — for what? Your spot quicker to the ultimate destination?

So many parents fail their kids, and they fail them so early on

But what I'm mad at right now is society as a whole expecting kids to grow up too fast and know too much too fast. And then, on top of it, not raising them with proper discipline so when they're “adults,” they're out there tearing up this world. And then you all question why?! I wonder why so many kids out there doing petty crimes then acting out like four-year-olds in the judicial system and getting slaps on the wrist and sent back out for the parents to take no responsibility and blame it on the system

It starts at home

And anyone who believes differently is delusional and can fight me over it

They need to bring back old school butt whoppings and for the love of god ladies and gentleman stop kicking your kids out at 18! They ain't grown

They can't afford to live on their let alone make grown decisions. Let them live at home and push for them to get an education and or an excellent job

Push for kids to help parents more. We don't help elderly and that is because we haven't taught our kids to

We in America kick our kids out at 18 and put our family into nursing homes

Live at home take care of each other and help each other and learn right do right and be right

Be kind

The selfishness and malice and generational dysfunction will always make me mad

And trust me I'm not speaking from a glass house

How I grew up and how I've chose to parent hasnt been a walk in the park

But I communicate

My kids are KIDS, and they have hearts and souls, and feelings beyond what society even gives them time for, and raising good kids in this fucked up world isn't easy. But seeing it all come to shit sucks! Navigating thru it sucks and having to teach my kids about ignoring certain people in life is so sad

To teach them all the dangers and reality is already sad

Why would I want to push them on their own to face that already at only 18

It starts at home, with parenting

Love your kids! And they are kids! Children! Tiny innocent beings with huge imaginations that want love and to discover

We'd have many better people if parenting styles and dysfunction weren't so THERE! Like just why does it even have to be a thing anymore

When will we do better

Abuse or drugs or addiction or mental illness will never be a reason to be a shitty person or a shitty parent, and I fear for my children ever to feel unloved or get hurt by this world, but it'll happen, but why would I actively treat them like an adult or teen way beyond the appropriate time

I just don't understand it anymore and I don't want to

I'm just going to keep mentally fighting to stay strong thru the Bullshit

Cuz parenting with other parents is hard

Adulting with other adults is even harder

[ineedfairypee]

Early intervention can change outcomes

[bianca-alexander88]

Authoritarian parents, with their unwavering resolve, adhere to rigidity and sternness, their discipline veiled as tough love. This approach, while molding remarkably compliant children, can, at its zenith, yield repercussions such as diminished self-worth, constrained autonomy, and a stifled capacity for independent thought, as discerned by psychologists.

[wanderingmind867]

In class today I got upset by the concept of parenting styles. Namely, the idea that permissive parenting is bad. I think it's stupid to imply that permissiveness is just as bad as authoritarian parents or negligent parents, and I don't really get it. Sure, excessive permissiveness is bad. But that's why there should be a mild permissive style. One that's mostly permissive, but with things like routine and consistency having a big part.

[gr8googlymoogly]

I’ve been going down a rabbit hole about how the parenting styles you were raised with may lead to you have a certain attachment style. So as I do I asked my siblings which parenting styles our parents had from their experience. I listed out authoritarian, authoritative, permissive, and neglectful as the choices. My brother proceeded to say dad wasn’t any of those choices because he wasn’t authoritarian he was closer to a dictator. So now the research is all skewed and my siblings are pissy. I must return back to my mind cave to ponder how to proceed.