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dearieshima · 5 months ago

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WANT

✦SUMMARY

╰┈➤ Choso, your big-dick, virgin boyfriend, had never ventured beyond the fervor of deep kisses. His unfamiliarity with human intimacy, coupled with the fear of losing himself in the overwhelming rush of release, kept him tethered to restraint. He wants to overcome his fear and have a mind-blowing experience with you and he needs your help to guide him through.

"Please, please," he panted incoherently, his words a mix of desperate pleading and mindless begging. "Please don't stop... I'm... I'm right there... so close... please..."

✦C.W

╰┈➤ virgin!choso, submissive!choso, dominate!reader, established relationship, hand job (m!receiving), kissing the tip, crying, soft sex kinda, praise, 3586+ words, orgasmophobia, AFAB reader, comfort

The heat between you two was electric as your lips locked in a passionate battle for dominance. Your bodies were pressed close, hearts racing with exhilaration. As the kissing grew more intense, you found yourself tiring from bending on your toes. Your thighs ached, crying out for a change in position.

Slowly, you lowered yourself, allowing your body to sink onto Choso's lap. As you did, you felt his hardness pressing instantly against you through the fabric of his sweats. He hissed at the sudden contact, his hands gripping your tights with a firm grasp.

You began to leave a trail of hot, open-mouthed kisses along the column of his neck and down his collarbone. All the while, you grinded your hips against his, relishing the delicious friction. Choso groaned, tossing his head back off the edge of the couch, exposing more of his throat to your eager lips and tongue.

But suddenly, he sat up straight as a board, his back rigid against the cushions. At the same time his chin clashed with your forehead, his hands clenched your thighs, lifting them slightly off him as if to create some distance between your bodies.

He was panting, his mouth wide and his breaths shuddering. "Not yet..." he said, his voice a low, husky whisper. His eyes were dark with desire, and his hands gripped your thighs tightly as he held you in place. "Fuck..."

You raised an eyebrow, concern flickering in your eyes as you slipped off his lap. "Is everything alright?" You pressed a hand to your forehead, your own breath still shallow and uneven. You asked not just because his chin likely throbbed like your head did, but because of the suddenness with which he had ended things, like you were hot coal thrown on his body.

Choso nodded, his eyes squeezed shut as he took in deep, steadying breaths. His hands clenched together in a bundle in his lap, guarding his obvious arousal. Then they unfolded and Choso bent down, his hands now guarding his face in embarrassment. "Yeah," he rasped, his voice rough. "Just... need a moment. Can you turn off the music?"

You reached for the remote, your movements quick and deliberate, and silenced the T.V, the sensual ambient music fading away. The room was now filled with the sounds of both of your ragged breathing.

He straightened and looked back up at you with lust-clouded eyes. "Sorry…” he began, his eyes averting, “I didn't expect you to... get so aggressive," he whispered.

"I’m sorry," you whispered sincerely, concern etched on your features. "Should we stop for a moment? I won't be offended if you need a break, or if you want to stop all together."

Choso shook his head and then chuckled weakly, still trying to catch his breath. "No... it's okay. You just..."

He paused, his hands loosening their grip on his sweats. He took another deep breath and looked up at you with a gentle smile. "You just caught me off guard, that's all."

Choso, your big-dick, virgin boyfriend, had never ventured beyond the fervor of deep kisses, not even tempted during in the intimacy of shared showers. His unfamiliarity with human intimacy, coupled with the fear of losing himself in the overwhelming rush of release, kept him tethered to restraint. The idea of surrender, of being swept away by ecstasy, haunted him. He feared that in offering you all of him, laying his soul bare, he might unravel in ways that would make you turn away.

Yet, beneath that fear, a deep yearning stirred within him. He longed to share those tender, unspoken moments of intimacy with you. He had watched scenes of lovers consumed by their lust, eyes ablaze with passion. Choso wondered how they could give so much, how they could surrender fully and still be loved for their vulnerability, how their eyes could carry so much love and at the same time a burning hunger to devour each other. He ached to know that with you, to feel your skin against his as you moved together in perfect sync, to look in each other’s eyes in worship and at the same time, think of how much you wanted to see the other crumble. He imagined looking into your eyes in that moment, seeing the reflection of love and desire, wanting to watch you break apart, knowing he was the cause.

The thought sent his heart racing - the idea of tracing slow kisses along the curve of your neck, feeling the softness of your body beneath his fingertips, hearing your breath hitch in pleasure. Choso wanted nothing more than to make love to you, share whispered confessions meant only for your ears. But his fear stood like an unmovable wall, holding him back, uncertain if he could ever give in to that kind of surrender.

But tonight, he’s willing to climb that wall, just as long as you scaled it with him.

"How about this," you whispered, your breath tickling his ear. "How about you tell me how I should help you? Tell me what you like."

Choso’s eyes widened, pupils widening like ink spreading in water, his breath steadying as your words sank in. A soft flush bloomed across his cheeks, warm and unbidden, like the first light of dawn catching fire in the sky. If you didn’t know better, you might’ve mistaken it for the stirring of his blood technique.

Choso swallowed hard, trying to gather his thoughts. He took a moment to think, swallowing heavily as he tried to put his thoughts into words. "I... I don't really know," he admitted sheepishly. "I've never done anything like this before, so I don't really know what I like."

"We've kissed before, and touched a little. Did you like anything I did before?"

Choso nodded, his blush deepening. "I... I liked it when you were on top of me," he admitted, his voice slightly hoarse. "And when you... when you kissed my neck."

With a graceful motion, you swung your leg over Choso’s lap, settling into place as your gaze locked with his, deep and smoldering. His hands found your hips as if drawn by an unspoken force, fingers curling gently against your skin, the connection between you as natural as breathing. "Do you want me to kiss your neck?"

Choso nodded, his breathing growing heavier as he imagined it. "Yes," he whispered, his voice barely more than a breath, thick with yearning. "Please," he added softly, the word trembling in the air, as though without it, you might deny him what he so quietly craved.

Slowly, teasingly, you leaned in and brushed your soft lips against the sensitive flesh of his neck. Choso shuddered, his hands gripping your hips as a soft gasp escaped his parted lips. You continued your assault, trailing open-mouthed kisses along his throat, tasting the salt of his skin. "Don't stop," Choso whispered urgently, his voice thick with desire.

You followed the unspoken rhythm, lips grazing softly down to his collarbone, leaving a trail of warmth in your wake. Your mouth lingered at his throat, brushing the delicate curve of his Adam’s apple as it dipped with a quiet tremor of pleasure. With a slow, deliberate path back upward, you paused to let your tongue dance over the quickened beat of his pulse. Choso’s breath escaped in a quiet, low groan, his head falling back in a gesture of blissful surrender, as if yielding entirely to the moment between you.

"You're being so good for me," you murmured against his throat, nipping lightly. "I love how responsive you are."

"More," he breathed, his voice shaky. "I want... I want more."

"What do you want me to do?" you asked, your voice soft and inviting.

Choso's hands gripped your thighs tighter, his body tensing. "I want... I want you to keep touching me," he said, his voice trembling a little. "I want you to keep making me feel good."

"Where do you want me to make you feel good, Choso?"

Choso's breathing grew ragged as he considered your question. "Everywhere," he said hoarsely. "I want you to touch me... everywhere."

As he spoke, his hands moved from your thighs to your hips, his fingers tracing patterns against your hips. "I want to feel your hands all over me," he added, his voice strained with need.

Your fingers trailed from his neck, down the center of his chest, following the contours of his muscles. "Like this?"

His own hands flex on your hips, fingers digging in slightly as if to anchor himself. The air between you is charged, heavy with anticipation. Choso's chest rises and falls rapidly, his skin flushed and gleaming in the low light. He looks utterly debauched already, and you've barely even touched him. "Y-yes," he gasped. "God, yes. That feels... that feels good."

As you run your fingers along his chest, you can feel the warmth emanating from his skin, like a furnace burning beneath your touch. His muscles twitch and ripple under your fingertips, responding to your gentle caresses. You can sense the power and strength within him, and it's utterly captivating. "Do you want me to continue going down?"

Choso's heart rate quickened as your question sunk in, and he swallowed heavily, his throat bobbing. "Yes," he whispered, his voice ragged. "Please, yes."

Your hands move lower, tracing the contours of his abs, feeling the way they tighten and relax as his breathing becomes more labored. You can hear his heart pounding, the rhythmic thumping echoing in your ears like a primal drumbeat. It drums fast, and you have a hunch to where the extra blood flow is traveling to.

When your fingers skim over the waistband of his pants, Choso lets out a choked moan, hips canting upwards in a silent plea. His hands gripped your hips tighter, his body trembling in anticipation when your forefinger hooked both his sweats and boxers.

"Color?"

Choso shuddered as your finger teased the edge of his pants, and he took a moment to catch his breath before responding. "Green," he said, his voice raspy but determined. "Definitely green. Please, don't stop."

You sank to your knees, your hands caressing his thighs as you parted his legs. With deliberate slowness, you parted his legs, revealing the bulge beneath his pants. Your mouth watered in anticipation as you peeled away his restrictive garments, unveiling his rigid, pulsating cock. It stood proud and erect, a deep shade of purple at the engorged tip, the foreskin pushed back, a clear sign of its untouched, virgin state. You noted he was uncut, which also fueled the testament that nobody had ever ventured near his dick before.

Droplets of pre-cum glistened at the tip, hanging like droplets from a leaf, beckoning you to catch them with your tongue. Your heart raced as you leaned in close to adjust yourself, your warm breath teasing the sensitive head of his cock. The salty musk of his arousal filled your nostrils. You couldn't resist any longer. Your tongue darted out, catching one of the droplets, savoring the taste. The sensation of your velvety tongue on his hypersensitive skin caused Choso to gasp, his hips bucking instinctively in a whine. After, you leaned in close, your warm breath ghosting over his skin as you placed a single, feather-light kiss on the very tip.

His hands gripped the couch cushions on either side of him, as if clinging to something to anchor himself. "Color?" you asked softly, your voice gentle and soothing.

Choso took another shaky breath, his chest heaving. "Green," he repeated, his voice hoarse. "I-I'm okay. Just... please keep going."

His hands remained clenched tight around the couch cushions, his knuckles turning white.

"Are you sure?" you asked, reaching out to gently touch his hand. "You seem so tense."

Choso swallowed, his cheeks flooding with a deep blush as his thumb circled nervously at your hand. "I... I'm just a little nervous," he admitted softly. "But... but I want this. I want you," he added, his voice a strained whisper.

Listening to him, you let go of his hand and snuggled up between his thighs, your breasts gently pressing against the soft cushions of the couch. Your fingers, like curious tendrils, began to snake their way down his rigid shaft, tracing the bold, pulsing veins that ran along its length.

Choso let out a sharp gasp, his body involuntary jerking at your touch. His eyes squeezed shut, and he panted heavily, drawing in deep, shuddering breaths until he could steady himself enough to speak. "Y/N..." he breathed your name, his voice a mixture of awe and desire. "That... that feels good..."

"You look like you're about to explode."

Choso's breathing grew even more ragged, his chest heaving erratically as you continued to touch him. "I... I feel like I am," he admitted, his voice strained. "But I don't want to… I don’t want to make a mess…"

He grips the edge of the couch tightly, his knuckles turning white from the force. You can see the conflict in his eyes. "If I keep going, you're going to," you say, stopping your hands. "It's okay to let go, Choso. I promise you'll feel better, and I'll be gentle."

Choso took a couple more deep breaths, his body visibly shaking with the effort to hold himself together. His eyes met yours, a mixture of fear and desire in them.

"I... I don't want to embarrass myself," he said, his voice low and vulnerable. "I want to make you feel good too... I don't want to fail."

"You won't embarrass yourself because it's just me and you," You said, gently. "Making you feel good makes me feel good."

Choso's gaze held a mixture of vulnerability and yearning, and you could see the relief wash over him as he nodded. His voice, a soft, husky whisper, trembled ever so slightly as he spoke, "Just... just go slow, please."

Complying with his request, you allowed your hands to reclaim their position, your fingers tracing languid circles around his hardening length. Your fingers danced along his shaft, tracing the pulsing veins and ridges. You could feel him throb and twitch beneath your touch, his breaths coming faster now. Gently, you swirled your thumb around the sensitive head, smearing the glistening precum in slow, teasing circles. Emboldened by his whimpers, you wrapped your fingers around him fully, stroking up and down in a steady rhythm. Your other hand came up to fondle his heavy balls, rolling them gently in your palm.

Choso's head fell back against the edge of the couch, his eyes pinched shut. A deep, guttural moan escaped his lips, and his body trembled. "Oh God," he panted, his head falling back onto the couch.

"Shh," You said, "it's alright, Choso."

Choso shuddered, his hands clenching the edge of the couch even tighter than before. "I... I can't..." he breathed, his voice ragged. "I don't know how..."

His body tensed even more, the muscles in his thighs trembling. Sweat beaded on his brow, and his breaths came in sharp gasps. "I... I’m going to..." his voice trailed off, too overwhelmed to continue.

"You don't have to think about it, just trust your body." You whispered, your breath hot against his skin.

Your hands moved faster, stroking and squeezing with expert precision. Choso's body writhed beneath you, his muscles tensing and releasing in a delicious rhythm. His breaths came in short, sharp gasps, and his eyes rolled back in ecstasy.

"Please, please," he panted incoherently, his words a mix of desperate pleading and mindless begging. "Please don't stop... I'm... I'm right there... so close... please..."

His fingers dug deeper into the cushions, leaving small indentations behind. His breathing grew more ragged, and you could feel the tremors running through his body. You slowed your movements, teasing him mercilessly, watching as he struggled to maintain control.

"Y... Y/NNN..." he croaked, your name coming out slurred in his mouth, drunk on the feeling you were giving him.

"Don't beg me," You said, gently as my hands continued their speed. "I can't make you release. If you want it, you need to let go yourself.”

Choso's body was taut, his legs trembling from the effort he was exerting to keep control. He took a shuddering breath, opening his eyes to look at you, tears of frustration and pleasure brimming in them.

"It’s going to be okay."

A bead of sweat trickled down Choso's temple as he drew in a labored, quivering breath. His chest heaved, the muscles straining with the effort of restraint. His eyes, heavy-lidded and dark with desire, flickered shut, surrendering to the insatiable hunger that had been gnawing at him. He trusted you, and he trusted his body.

His head fell back against the plush, velvety cushions of the couch, the softness cradling his skull as he succumbed to the tidal wave of carnal bliss. His right hand slammed on his mouth just as the dam within him burst, unleashing a primal, guttural moan that reverberated through the room.

Choso's hips bucked off the couch, his body arching in a frenzied, involuntary response to the euphoria coursing through his veins. Warm, sticky semen gushed forth, painting the air with strings of rampant lust. Some of the thick, pearly essence landed on your face, tracing a hot, wet trail down your cheek before you could tilt your head. Your tongue darted out, tasting the salty favor of Choso's essence.

As the final, shuddering spasms wracked his body, the last of his release coated his abdomen, your fingers traced the path of the spilled cum, smearing it across his skin in a sensual caress.

“Good job,” you whispered softly, your words a gentle anchor, bringing him back from where he had drifted.

Choso's body, slick with sweat and the remnants of his climax, trembled beneath your touch. His chest rose and fell in deep, ragged breaths, signaling the aftershocks of his orgasm. His eyes, still closed, fluttered open, meeting yours with a hazy, satisfied gaze.

Choso let out a long, shuddering sigh as he collapsed back onto the couch, his body spent and trembling. He looked dazed, his eyes half open and his breaths still shallow.

His chest rose and fell rapidly with each breath he took, his body still recovering from its release. "Wow," he breathed, his voice a little raspy. "That was... that was..."

His eyes darted to you, as if trying to find the words to express what he'd just experienced.

They widened, unabashedly taking in the sight of his cum in your hair as you cleaned yourself, the crimson hue staining his cheeks blazed in a vivid blush. His voice, still rough, trembled as he stammered, "I... I'm sorry. I didn't mean for... for that to happen on... on you."

You smiled, the corners of your lips curling upward as you crawled back onto his lap, your body pressing against his, igniting a spark of desire between you. Choso shifted, pushing himself into a sitting position, his fingers raking through his disheveled hair in a mixture of embarrassment and lust. "It's okay," you reassured him, the warmth in your tone inviting. "I liked it, and you were enjoying yourself so it's okay."

Choso's blush deepened, spreading to the tips of his ears as he admitted, "I... I did enjoy myself." His voice quivered, the intensity of his confession palpable. "A lot. Like...a lot a lot."

"That's good," you murmured, your voice a soft caress against Choso's ear, as you eased yourself onto his lap. The heat of his body enveloped you, and you could feel the steady thrum of his heartbeat. Your fingers threaded through his hair, each stroke a tender exploration, eliciting a low, contented sigh from the man beneath you.

His strong arms encircled your waist, drawing you closer, their warmth a comforting embrace. Choso leaned into your touch, his body yielding to the gentle pressure of your fingertips, the tension in his muscles dissolving like snow under a spring sun.

"I don't think I've ever felt so..." he began, struggling to find the right word. "So... spent. But in a good way."

Your eyes met his in a brief, intimate glance, and you offered a small, knowing smile. "Do you feel as if the weight of the world has been lifted, if only for a moment?"

Choso considered your words, his brow furrowing before he shook his head.

Your head tilted to the side, an innocent quirk to your expression as you gazed up at him, the flicker of curiosity in your eyes. "Hm? Why?"

He returned your gaze, his own eyes now smoldering with a newfound hunger, the fire of lust consuming the depths of his gaze. The intensity of it shot a shiver down your spine.

"I... I feel relaxed," he began, his voice slow and deliberate, "but I also feel... I feel like I need more. You haven't cum yet."

"I’m okay, Cho. Tonight was just about you."

Choso's head shook from side to side. "No," he said huskily. His fingers drawn circles on your waist as his hold on them tightened. He looked at you, his pupils widening and a blush settling in his face. "I want to make you feel good too. I don't want to be the only one to feel this."

part 2

#choso #choso x female reader #choso x reader #choso smut #choso kamo x reader #choso kamo #jjk smut #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutsu kaisen x reader #─𝖌𝖆𝖘𝖕!.✦#─𝕳𝖎𝖒𝖇𝖔𝖘.✦#zayne fic is coming next 🙂‍↕️

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tacticalprincess · 11 months ago

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mean!König x nerd!reader that has a soft spot for her:( making love to her. she’s so fragile and tiny and innocent he doesnt wanna hurt her! coddles her during sex, putting her in a mating press and kissing her tears away since she gets so overwhelmed from his big cock!!

he’s mildly annoyed by your sobbing, fat globs of tears running down your pretty cheeks as he tries to ease his thick cock into your tight hole, pushing past the resistance he’s met with. the pained vulnerability on your face when you look up at him is quickly dispelling his urge to ruin you, making him feel guilty for how impatient he is, and he can’t help cradling your head as he tries to calm you down so he can finally fucking fit.

“it’s okay, kind. don’t cry, ja? only making it harder for yourself.” he grunts out frustratedly, going against his very nature to try to comfort you. his voice is gravely and low, like it pains him to talk to you with respect. “just relax and let me in.”

every time he envisioned the day he finally fucked you, he always pictured it being rough and fast; making you scream and squirm on his dick as he ruined your innocence and turned you into a wanton slut for him — but now all he could do was hold you close and attempt to make it good for you. he imagined pounding into you roughly, fucking that big brain of yours empty, but as it is, your shaking legs are draped over his broad shoulders as his warm, burly body presses snugly against yours, rutting deep and slow inside your gummy walls like your fragile body will shatter if he makes any sudden moves. he presses kisses all over your tear-stained face, fixing your crooked glasses as his hips cant into you, mushroom tip leaking precum at how nicely you’re starting to open up for him, and he tells you as such, whispering sweet words into your ear and feeling you cling to him in response.

he hates how overcome with endearment he is by you, watching you sniffle and mewl cutely while he rubs at your puffy, sensitive clit, losing yourself in the pleasure. if it was anyone else’s cunt that took him this well, clenched him so tightly, he wouldn’t have been able to stop himself from blindly chasing his own release, but all your pretty noises and expressions make him want to take his time and savor you, anything to keep you feeling good.

#konig cod #konig x reader #konig call of duty #konig x you #konig x y/n #konig smut #könig x reader #könig cod #konig mw2 #könig smut #könig call of duty #bella writes⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

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eccentricallygothic · 5 months ago

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Apology Boy

Description: Paul finally apologizes for the scar(s) he gave you when he saw you for the first time.

Pairing: Paul Lahote | Human mate!You.

Warning(s): Paul's anger, possible past angst, fluff, Paul is a crazed mess for you, size kink (duh), imprinting/mates, abo!verse but you're human, possessiveness, fingering, cunnilingus (worship), breeding kink, licking, biting, smut with plot because oh God I can never stop myself, teasing, pet names, unprotected p-in-v, overstimulation, manhandling, light dom!Paul because I am still me. MDNI.

Type: Request, for the sweet @wishyouloveme, here.

MASTERLIST

Just like any other day.

. . .

It hit Paul like a freight train and caused sweat to form in ice cold drops on his otherwise warm skin. He had just returned from patrol with Embry and was spread over Emily's dining table whilst stuffing his face with the food she had cooked for them. Everything was fine and dandy. It was a pleasant day and the weather was nice and cool. Soon, he would be done with his daily obligations and then he would go home.

But then Sam came up behind Emily who was standing next to her mate's seat at the head of the table, one hand on the frame and other on her hip as she listened to Seth drone on and on about something that Paul's voice refused to register due to what unfolded next.

The pack leader's strong arms snaked around the waist of his delicate lover as he nuzzled his nose into her hair until the tip had found its way past the dark strands and against her tender cheek until it was caressing and tracing the scars he had left on her.

All blood drained from Paul's skin and something in his head clicked. His surroundings faded to a dim buzz and the next few moments went by in a blur.

And then he was standing in front of home.

“Paul!” You yelp in surprise at the sight of your nude lover. He usually dresses himself at Sam's house after patrols before coming home to you.

Since you are human and your initial experience with the pack had both been overwhelming -thanks to your lover imprinting on you the first chance he was given- and traumatizing -as said lover who was much worse at controlling his primal urges back then had lost control at the sight of you because he was so overcome with raw, foreign emotion he did not know how to process-, you prefer to keep by yourself near the outskirts of the community in a house that Paul had moved in with you upon your request.

The pack life is simply too loud and… public for you; a city girl used to her secluded places and treasured privacy.

You notice that Paul is panting -which is very unlike him due to his superhuman strength- and a redness outlines his eyes when his huge form approaches yours. “Are you— Paul!” You gasp and nearly flinch from both the shock and impulse when he lets his heavy body collapse on its knees in front of you. “What the hell happen—” you never know with your hyper emotional mate.

His long fingers push your sweater up and out of his way so he can stroke the soft skin of your stomach with the tip of his nose, his head nuzzling into your chest as his dark eyes flutter close and he inhales a deep whiff of your scent. It is the only thing that never fails to calm your hot blooded lover down.

“What's wrong?” Your voice lowers to a concerned mumble as you peer down at him, your fingers cradle the dusky skin of his handsome face -as much of it as you can reach- and your nails rake through the male's jet black mass of short hair. “Honey?” He only behaves like this if something went wrong or when he is in need of comfort, which are both rare occurrences as he is the usual caretaker in your relationship. But you aren't a complete stranger to him acting like this.

Ever the uncommunicative one, the male only sighs— no, whimpers against your skin as if he's wounded and softly feels your skin with gentle caresses of his fingers. Words require thought, patience and wisdom. Unfortunately, Paul's instinctual mind runs too fast for those things to catch up with it in time and rash actions get carried out before better sense can supply him from its store.

“Paul…” A shiver runs down your spine when his lips that had begun to softly peck your navel find their way up your stomach before they halt to ghost over the healed, plum coloured lesions that stretch across your tender skin in menacing shapes akin to claw marks. “What are you doing?” Though he never mentions or discusses it verbally due to the guilt he feels, sometimes Paul becomes hyper aware of the scars of his unmediated passion that mar your skin and tries to make up for them in his own wordless ways.

Except, this only ever happens when you're underdressed or the two of you are indulging in activities typical to couples and the sight of them reminds him of their cause. He has never stormed into the house stark naked and marched up to you like an unreadable oversized pup on the brink of tears like this.

“I am sorry.” You nearly jump due to how unexpected the sound of his words are. Usually he just sulks in silence. “Baby, I am so sorry” Paul never speaks when he is in one of these moods. Especially when he is experiencing bouts of guilt for his actions during his first encounter with you. “Oh, God” his body grows heavy against yours as he practically pushes his face into the crevices like he wants to become one with them and fill them back up to their original state with parts of himself.

“Paul— oof!” Your smaller body yields to his weight and the ground slips from underneath your feet. “D- Did the guys say something?” You fear the worst as Paul's protective hands catch you before your back can hit the wooden ground and you cannot help but whimper from how his lips lock with the scars in thick, desperate and hurried apologetic kisses.

Paul and his pack mates play rough and sometimes they go too far with the teasing. So though he clings to the tough guy act in front of them, he dismantles into you once he is home if their words ever get too far. Yes, the tussling and fighting is not enough if it's serious. And just sometimes, when it gets too much for him to bottle it up, he shares some of it with you. But most often not, since he knows how you feel about the pack and he does not like to worry you.

“I am sorry it has taken me this long to say it out loud, baby… but I am so sorr—”

“Paul, hey, look at me” but he refuses to detach himself from your skin in his shame, his big hands safely holding your whole body up against his. “You don't have to—” you cannot help it, you hate to see him like this when you know how badly he regrets it. You hate for him to hurt.

“But I do” he nearly growls against your skin, his fingers tightening on your hips to brace himself against the war in his head. “There’s not a day that goes by where I don't regret it.”

“But you didn't do it on purpose, baby” you sigh when he refuses to let you see him. Your fingers try to pry his stubborn face upwards. “And you worked and improved for us, didn't you, hm?” Your eyes earnestly search for his. “Don't sell yourself so short.” One of your hands rubs his tense shoulders to try and ease their guilt-stricken stiffness.

“All the same” ever the stubborn knucklehead. “I should have done this a long time ago. But I was selfish and I was afraid that if I verbally mentioned it…” He hesitates and the love you behold for him renders you helpless against a burning urge to reassure him.

“My love—”

“I was scared you'd get reminded of it and…” He takes a deep breath and then gulps down the bile in his throat, blinking back tears. “L- Leave me…” Paul's voice is barely a whisper and your heart breaks at how vulnerable he sounds. “And I am such an asshole for it because it had more to do with my fear of you leaving me than you reliving your trauma…”

“Paul…” You blink and try to focus, but his warm gropes and caresses falter your steam of thought.

“I love you, I really do, so much” he peeks up at you just a little, dark eyes frightened for the first time since the day he scarred you. “Please forgive me. I don't ever want to lose you. I know what I did was irreversible but I swear I'll spend the rest of my life fixing it… if you'll let me.” You shake your head.

Does he really think there's an off chance that you will leave?

“Paul” when you cup the side of his face, he hides into your stomach again. “Hey,” you try to duck your face closer to his. make him look at you. “Look at me” your intended request comes out an order due to all the emotions you feel. “I forgave you a long time ago. That's the reason why I am still here” you finally manage to place your forehead against his, making your breaths mingle with his. “I love you more, so much more.” He opens his mouth to drone so you beat him to it.

“Now shut up and kiss me.”

Paul is taken aback at your demand, his widening eyes prove it. But as surprising as it may be for him, this isn't something that was unresolved for you until today -unlike him- so you aren't as overwhelmed with angst. Because your mate has proven his love, devotion and worthiness of you through his actions over the course of your relationship. He has shown you that he loves you and that he is sorry for what he did.

If anything, his innocently intimate and lovestruck worship of your body has fired it up instead of making it sentimental.

And so you want him.

Bad.

“But—”

“No buts. Kiss me.” You are breathless as you urge him to do so, your hands try to pull his face closer into yours although in vain because his bigger and stronger form remains unbudging.

Paul's eyes search yours for assurance. “... Yes, ma'am” he whispers once finds it and the next thing you know, you're being pounced down onto the floor with his arms cased around you to protect you from the impact.

And though you always feared that him getting physical in this manner would trigger you, you giggle against his mouth that he drags across your chest and up your throat to clamp onto yours. Your arms circle around his broad shoulders and instead of trying to repel him -like you suspected you would despite having grown to trust him now- you pull him closer as you whimper into the tender yet hungry kiss, feeling your legs climb the lower half of his body instinctively.

“Paul~” you needily blabber against his tongue that he uses to enjoy the sweetness of your mouth, his balmy lips enveloping everything your mouth has to offer in tight, big kisses. “Mm~” your chest aches from the strain the lack of oxygen puts on your lungs but your sparking nether regions only scoot closer to his that you feel riling up against yours, your hips grinding against his and limbs tightening around his rock hard body.

“Mine” he growls against your mouth when he has no choice but to pull apart at last, his coarse fingers groping you in greedy handfuls while peeling away any fabric that hurdles their path to your skin. “All mine” you moan at the feeling of his teeth grazing against the tender skin of your boobs that he sprays with kisses and licks. “God, mouse, I love you so much” the strength he puts into pushing everything you wear on your upper body away from it leaves you breathless. You love the thrill you feel when his touch feels like he is on the horizons of the dangers he is capable of. When he is so worked up and desperate that he cannot help but get rough because your sweet sweat and arousing body heat fires him up the way it does. You are addicted to the sight of him not giving in to his beastly impulses despite all that because he loves you so much. It is scary, yes. But it turns you on too.

“I love you too, Paul” though he likes to act cocky and all-knowing most of the time, you know he needs to hear it too. Underneath all that knucklehead play fighting and manhandling of his, he needs reassurance just as much as the next person and though he tries not to burden you as his different lifestyle is hard enough for you as it is, you don't have to be part wolf to feel him and hear his heart.

“You're so perfect…” The way he peppers wet kisses along your cheekbone whilst relieving you of the rest of your clothing causes for your eyes to flutter close to cherish the tingling feeling that sparks your body alight. “Just—” when you try to reach for him to also make it enjoyable for him, he plants your hands above your head and softens your confused pout with a kiss. “Just let me take care of you today, yeah? Don't worry about anything.”

“But— oh!” He reaches for the mating mark that sits on the right side junction of your neck where a she-wolf's mating glad would be. And though you lack the physical features to feel him through it, the meaning that it holds for Paul serves as a bridge for the biological gap. “Oh…” You turn your head sideways to rub your cheek against his shaved one, your hips roll into his hand that dips between your legs and you shudder against Paul's hot tongue that drags across the impressions of his teeth that crevice your skin.

“Taste so fuckin' sweet, baby” there is a strain in Paul's voice because of how much strength it is taking him to hold himself back from impaling you full of his cock right there. “So perfect” the lower half of his body leaps down so he can rub his bare erection against the softness of your leg.

You moan at the feeling. “Paul,” you whisper into his hair, the feeling of his sharp teeth causing for slick to sizzle up to your entrance from the inside. He growls out a quiet yes, baby against the mark, one hand constantly caressing the dents running along the width of your stomach. “Don't hold back” you go to touch his rock hard cock and he grunts in denial, seizing your wrist in his fingers faster than you can blink.

His face comes up to dominate your vision. “No, mouse, tonight is all about you” another kiss squishes out any protest you can form and when his invasive tongue has your nostrils flared from the breathlessness, Paul drags it down your writhing body in the company of heavy pecks until his mouth is between your thighs and he is propping one up with a broad shoulder and the other with his hand that isn't occupied with caressing the evidence of his temper.

“Paul—!” He knows how shy you get when he is between your legs like this.

But it's not his fault you taste so fulfilling.

“Sh, little mouse, you're perfect” he kisses any and all insecurities away with gentle kisses, the hand that cases one of your thighs stroking the tender inside with its thumb. “And you taste so good too” he takes his time worshiping your pelvis, deliberately leaving out your pussy to save the best for last. And though you pretend to disapprove and whine for him to come back up and just fuck you instead, his soft kisses that vibrate into your skin every time he moans at the feeling of your nether skin touching his slightly chapped lips, you find yourself helplessly crying out for more at the end.

“Paul, please!” You feel his mouth twist into a smirk and your hands dart to finger his thick hair to withstand the sensation of his mouth hovering over your petals.

“Please what, mouse?” You roll your eyes at the taunt in his voice.

“Please touch me!” Your fingers impatiently tug at his short strands and he grins.

“Oh, mouse, but I am touching you” you whine and his shoulders vibrate under your knees from his devilish mirth.

“Y- You know what I mean!” Though your cheeks are already aflush, you feel new heat seep underneath the layers of the reddened skin.

“Mmm, but I thought you wanted me to—”

“Paul!” You desperately whine and he lets out a deep cackle.

“Fine, geez” he is so mean when he gets smug. You go to scowl down at him but he takes the mound between your legs in a deep handful and feels the slit between your petals in a vertical caress of his thumb before you do and you end up letting out a loud moan instead. “Needy much?” You bite your lip and wantonly roll your hips closer to his mouth. “Tsk, tsk. Impatient little mouse…” The tip of his digit presses between your nether lips that are dusted with pearly discharges of your arousal and a cherry red flush and your hips buck in anticipation. “You're lucky that you're so pretty and I like you so much…” Your spine trembles in your skin when you feel the coarse skin of his thumb against your ultrasensitive folds. “Because I typically don't appreciate things so small ordering me around…” Your back arches when he finally sticks the hot tip of his tongue between your nether lips.

“Oh…” You feel your toes curl. “More, please, Paul, more.”

He is so enchanted by your sweet scent and addictive taste that he is ignorant to anything that isn't your body. “But you, my dear mouse, you're something else…” His strong hands take your ass in them and he firmly kneads the plump skin, talking pretty much over you with a lust-drunken madness. You mewl out a moan at the feeling and Paul growls at the sound you make, pulling you closer to his mouth as he presses an open kiss to your pussy. “Fuck,” he groans and licks his lips that glisten from your slick, his own tip leaking at the taste of you. “I've never tasted anything like you before and I sure as hell am never gonna get tired of it.”

“Paul!” you cry out when his tongue twirls against your entrance, his nose rubbing against your clit to caress it with the tip as he begins to eat you out.

His growl that vibrates your soaked folds to a buzzing life causes your eyes to roll to the back of your head. “Paul” you moan breathlessly, his name turning to a prayer as you tremble on the verge of releasing more slick.

“Gimme that sweet cum, baby, let me taste it” your lips part and you can't help but arch into his mouth with need. His hands are merciless, the one on your ass kneads it with rough gropes as the other massages the underside of your thighs in broad, determined strokes. You moan and writhe against him, your vision blurring at the hot waves that take over your body.

“I am gonna— oh, Paul!” He moans against you as you tremble and then release more even slick into his mouth. His tongue is in heaven as he greedily licks up all he can get.

“Fucking hell, baby” the grainy tip of his tongue pokes and prods at your entrance, working the little hole open. “I can't wait to stuff this pretty little pussy full of my pups.”

“Mmm, oh fuck, Paul, oh fuuuck” when he finally penetrates the tight barrier and his hot tongue invades your sensitive cavern, the burning knot between your hips gets tighter. Paul moans at the feeling of your delicate walls and though the vibrations of his doing so shakes you to your core, you cannot help but greedily wrap your legs around his head to both stay in place and withstand the pleasure.

“Oh, God, Paul, ’m so close!” Your voice is a breathless mewl and he growls at the vulnerable sound, his cock hurting from need. “Oh, fuck” you tremble so badly that you'd collapse into the ground if your knees weren't propped up by your mate's shoulders. “Oh fuck, oh fuck” Paul’s jaw flexes against your thighs when he begins to fuck you with his tongue, one hand fumbling for your cunt before he tickles the hood with his thumb. Your back arches and you clench your eyes shut, your chest heaving as you gasp out his name.

“Tsk, tsk, mouse” his hot breath fans your sensitive folds and you can't help but whimper at the feeling of his middle finger replacing his tongue. “You need to relax.” His hand that holds your ass pats your cheek in an endearing yet condescending way and your whole body tenses up at the touch even more. “I'm gonna take care of you, baby” you cannot help but rock your hips to his finger stretching your insides out against it. “You're mine and I'll never let you get hurt again, I promise” he croons before pressing a tender kiss to your clitorial nub. “You know that, right?” He kisses the slick covered inside of your thigh next to soothe your shaking body. “Tell me you know you're mine” his possessive words make the heat between your legs to go haywire.

“I am yours, Paul” you breathlessly promise him before letting out a moan when he tickles your folds with his tongue in a praising manner, satisfaction breaking out on his handsome face at your obedience.

“Good mouse” he begins to lap at your nub and your walls tense around his finger as a result, causing for your slick to slosh from the opening and down Paul's hand. “Shh, mouse, easy now” he cooes to get you to relax because of how tightly you are clenching yourself and it only gets worse when he adds a second finger. Your hips are so tight. You are on the edge. “You're gonna let me take care of this cute little pussy, aren't you?” You whimper at the feeling of being stuffed full and being licked at the same time.

“Y- Yes, Paul!” The air is heavy with the smell of slick and the sound of him slurping your juices up.

He adds a third finger and you nearly burst into tears from the pleasure. “Oh God, Paul, I am gonna cum!” Your entrance burns from the stretch and you moan from the bittersweet discomfort. “Please, lemme cum! Wanna cum so bad! Please, please!” Your submissive side comes out because of how overwhelmed you are and Paul can cum from the fragility of your voice right here.

“Hold it for me, mouse, good girl, c'mon” you sob at his cruel denial and he closes his lips around a mouthful of your folds, soundfully sucking at the clammy skin as he speeds his hand up to practically hammer your trembling pussy into an orgasm. Your toes curl and you throw your head back, fingers tugging at his hair as you tremble violently against him. Your back arches from how his free hand pinches and twists your nipples, softly landing occasional smacks to your boobs. “Good girl. I know you can take it” his hand then comes down to massage your ass cheek to make for a better stretch. “Relax, baby” you sob out his name and he smiles against your quivering core, his cheek gently caressing the inside of your thigh to get you to loosen up a little because you are clenching so hard.

“You're doing good, mouse. So good” his lips buzz against your clit. “Take it, baby, take it” your walls twitch against his coarse digits. “That's a good girl” he praises you while continuing to stuff your pussy with his fingers, the feeling of being filled up to the brim causing for you to shake and tremble violently. “That's my good girl” his tongue licks your clit as his fingers curve inside of you to search for your sensitive bundle of nerves that always makes you let out the sweetest of melodies.

“I'm gonna— I can't anymore, Paul!” Neon shapes cloud your vision when his fingers graze your sensitive spot and he growls at the feeling of your walls convulsing around his fingers.

“Yeah, baby. You can cum now” he finally relents and you cry out from the joy. “My little mouse, give me that sweet cum” his mouth never stops moving against you and you are so overcome with emotion that you are not sure if the tears that are streaming down your cheeks are due to pleasure or pain. “Gimme it, mouse. Gimme it” his tongue is like a beast that eats you up to satiate its starvation. You cry out his name from the pleasure.

“Paul! Paul, Paul— oh god!” The tongue is too much, though it gives you everything you could ask for at the moment, you need to escape. But when you try to pull away Paul catches your hips and holds you in place.

“Now, where do you think you're going, little mouse?” There is a beastliness to his voice.

“N- No, Paul! No more—” you don't get to finish your plea because his mouth clamps down on your sensitive flesh to suckle on it in big, eager kisses again and your heart threatens to burst through your chest.

“Oh fuck” the knot between your legs tightens so hard you cannot maintain it anymore. Vertigo breaks through your hearing. “Oh— Paul!” The orgasm takes over your whole body, your mind blurs from the burst of sensation that courses through your blood and everything turns into a euphoric mess. “O- Oh God…” You tremble from the aftershock and Paul groans when he feels you squirt. He releases your hips and you fall back onto the floor, your body too weak to withstand its own weight. “O- Oh fuck…” You're breathless and your body feels like jelly. “Paul, oh Paul…” Your fingers desperately try to reach for him like you're no older than a baby and you notice that he is stroking his hurting cock because of the need to bury his knot in you, a pained expression etched across his face. “P- Paul, I am ready” though you can barely speak, your body shakes from the need to be filled up by him.

“Mouse… are you sure?” Though his voice strains from the painful need, he prioritizes your comfort over his and your heart wells up.

“Y- Yes” you try to sit up. “Fill me up, please” he needs no more encouragement after that. With a low growl, he jumps onto you and you feel the tip of his cock press against your entrance in a heated caress that makes you whine, your body even forgetting to yelp from how he pounces on you.

“I'll never hurt you again, mouse” he whispers into your ear as he buries his nose into your hair, cock throbbing between your legs. You gasp when he enters you in a quick thrust that makes for all the air to bolt out of your lungs. “I promise.” You tremble in his hold and Paul groans at the feeling.

“I know” his mouth clamps down on the mating mark upon hearing your whisper and he slowly stretches your pussy to fit around his erection that even after all that fingering is still too big for your tiny cunt. The overstimulation causes for stars to form in your vision. His cock twitches inside you and he growls, the tip of his tongue tickling your nape in need.

“That's a good girl, baby” the hand that cups the side of your face tenderly strokes your cheek. “Relax for me” when your walls finally adjust to his log-like girth, Paul grins against the mating mark. “You're doing so good for me” the thrust of his hips causes for his cock to rub against your sensitive spot and your eyes roll to the back of your head with the feeling. “There's my good girl. You take my cock so well.” He releases his bite, hips pistoning up and down between your legs as he baby talks to you and strokes your hair to comfort you against the overstimulation that makes you whine.

“Paul!” You tremble as he fucks you in slow, long strokes and you cannot help but cry out his name in need.

“I'm here, baby. I got you” he murmurs into your hair and you moan at the baritone of his voice. “Take this cock, baby, you got it” he pants as his fat cock slides in and out of you. Then he suddenly grunts and readjusts you in his hold because the position is not comfortable enough for you and he can feel it. “God, you're so perfect.”

“I love you, Paul” you murmur into his ear, your hips lazily rolling against his as you hold him tight.

“I love you more” the latter part of his sentence turns into a growl due to his struggle with the positioning and he collects your limp form in his. “And I can do this better” though he roughly pushes your bodies off the floor to head for the bedroom, his fingers subconsciously caress your back in gentle strokes to make up for how your bare skin rubbed into the floor during the ordeal. You whine from how his heavy sack puts a strain on your entrance where your bodies connect as he does so. He cooes praise and reassurance in your ear as comfort, peppering your mouth with gentle kisses.

The next morning when he leaves for patrol in a black tank top and some shorts, there is a shy grin on his face as he looks back at the door one last time to wave you goodbye. You blush and return the gesture, biting your lip like it's the morning after your first time with each other.

“Geez, man, not the dreamy eyes!” A groan sounds from somewhere in the woods and you gasp before ducking behind the door. Chuckles and howls follow.

The jerk brigade has arrived.

“Someone get these two a room!” You recognize Jake's voice and shake your head as you peek outside from behind your shield. “Oh, wait, they did that already!” You cannot help but snort when you see that Paul has begun to jog in the direction of the voices. “In light of how the whole town learnt all the ways in which Paul's name can be moaned last night” uh, oh. That's not going to be good. Your lover is very private and sensitive about you as it is and when someone tries to pry or joke about matters of this sort he does not appreciate it. Especially if it's his hormonal friends that he knows too well. “Paul, Paul, oh, Paul!” Your cheeks burn in embarrassment and Paul snarls before he flings his shirt off and jumps into the air, transforming into his beastly form midway and disappearing into the woods to attack the offendor.

You see the great trees shake from the tussle that you can practically visualize behind them and the encouraging howls of Paul's pack mates further confirms it. They love to get a rise out of your easily excitable boyfriend and he loves to put them in their place, being the strongest after Sam. Their crossing of each other's boundaries for the sake of fun used to concern you in the beginning but Paul himself assured you that that was just how they played and it was not coming from a bad place.

So you wait for the ferocious crowd to move further away into the jungle that surrounds your house before you walk down to the dirt road to collect his clothing with a lighthearted shake of your head. A smile graces your lips as you do so and you cannot help but graze the now covered scars that your superhuman lover gave all his love to last night.

Though it will be a while before he does, you cannot wait for him to come back home to you.

. . .

I am sorry if it sucks omg I really hope you like it <3

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yeyinde · 8 months ago

Text

baby blues

John Price + the panic of fatherhood x reader

pregnancy. babies. soft. sappy. angsty. slight allusions to rough sex. John being possessive and smitten. allusions to childhood trauma. the fear of children is somehow more potent than the fear of god. girl dad John. mentions of Price's divorce lmao

Most assume he'd take to fatherhood like he'd been born for the role; handcrafted to cradle a swaddled babe in his arms. The perfect father figure. But as he hovers over your sleeping form, the little bundle nestled in the sleepy bracket of your arms, he's overcome with a sense of dread that punches hard enough to shatter bone.

The reality is this: Price doesn't understand kids. He wants them. Covets them with a viciousness that almost immediately sets alarm bells off in the heads of those who were opposed to the idea of children, parenthood. Giving birth. But when it comes to being a dad, a role model, an effigy to siphon wisdom and knowledge off of, he flounders. Hesitates.

All he has as an idea of fatherhood is bruises laughed off by the neighbours as him being a clumsy boy. A man who drank in the living room, silent in his fury, his belligerence, until something—anything, really—set him off. He always seemed like he was itching for a reason to punish.

And god, was he ever fucking good at it.

If anger issues are hereditary, then Price picked up the generational slack of his seething ancestors.

It's this, and the plethora of scars and burns that decorate his skin (well hidden, tucked away like a dirty secret because if Old Man Price was anything, it certainly wasn't stupid; he knows how to hide the ugliness of himself away, and how to turn a boy into a punching bag without causing too much damage, too much alarm) that make him ache something fierce when he sees his chubby little child for the first time.

Price doesn't know how to be gentle. All he has are worn, rough hands and a constant stench of smoke. A voice that makes grown men tremble. An ire unmatched thus far in his life.

Until you. Little spitfire. His hellion. You stood on the tips of your toes just to tell him off for being a stubborn pig! and then taught him how to hold you. How to be tender. But even now, he can see the wear on your skin from his bites. His propensity for violence that he morphs into desire. Into lust.

How is he supposed to be a dad when he's this caustic? This mean?

The answer doesn't come. All he gets is the rhythmic sigh of your breath as you sleep, well and truly exhausted after giving birth to their child. All alone. A constant in your lives, it seems. Aloneness. His work takes him away, throws him into dangerous situations. And you carry the brunt of it.

It caused the rupture of his first marriage and is a needling fear he carried with him when you started pursuing him some odd years ago. To think that he'd be standing here now, gazing down at you with your heavy eyes and your soft cheeks, rounded with the additional weight you gained during your early trimesters. A plushness he's trying to keep on you for good—all softened edges, flesh that gives when he touches you, marshmallows out between his fingers when he squeezes.

You look good like this. Motherhood, despite your misgivings (it took three years of him hinting and hounding you before you'd relented with a sure, what's the worst that could happen? We're terrible parents and raise a terrible kid? Or we end up the catalyst for a list of psychological issues and get reamed out during their therapy sessions later on in life?), suits you. Fits you like a glove.

A fact you'd been quietly overwhelmed by in the first few months, grieving the loss of something he couldn't ever understand, or experience. A piece of yourself morphing into the mother that raised you. A kaleidoscope of feelings that you choke on when he asks, unable to render them into coherent words.

But you're good at that, aren't you? Good at culling expectations, at superseding the limits others place on you. Even him.

Especially him.

When he'd said, don't know what you're gettin’ yourself into, love, you took it to the chin like he challenged you to a brawl, and set out to show him why you knew what this was, what he was, and why it didn't matter much.

Even now—

Giving birth all alone. Overcoming the isolation of being shackled to a man who married his post first. Sisterwife to his career. Second in all things.

Even this.

He was in Iceland when he got the call. Laswell, of all people, was on the other line telling him his own wife was in the delivery room. Water broke. Baby is on the way.

And you—

Don't worry, old man. Just do what needs to be done and we'll be waiting. Always.

—well. You certainly are. Alone in a hospital room with the curtains drawn to blot out the sun as you sleep, cradling this thing he made with his fingers shoved deep into your mouth, uttering foul under his breath as he crushed you to the bed, rutting you like an animal—the most tender he could ever be—and he's suddenly all too aware of his own inadequacies. His shortcomings. Failures.

He's not a dad. He's not the sort of man people think about when they think healthy father figure. He likes cigars and whiskey, and sometimes aches for a mission that will let him cut his knuckles on teeth—bloodletting; exorcising his demons out on the people he's sanctioned to kill. How is he supposed to guide a child when he threw a man over a railing without a second thought—

The bundle stirs. Wrinkled, red face scrunching up tight. Little thing is just like you, huh? All softness and give. All—

They cry, and it's shrill. Loud. It jars him.

Not the sound, but the anguish he feels piercing through his chest as they bellow out their confusion to the world, this lost little thing. Strapped with a father who was beaten black and blue and told to be a man when he cried.

But right now—anger is the furthest thing on his mind. He can't fathom that emotion when his child is whimpering in your arms, chubby little fingers grasping at the air. Seeking comfort.

Waking you feels cruel when you've spent the better part of two days awake. Four, really. You couldn't sleep when the contractions hit, wide-eyed and worried about everything. What if something went wrong? If they hated you? What if you hurt them—

Worries he tried to assuage, but couldn't deny he felt them, too.

All he knows how to do is hurt. But as he reaches down for this little thing squirming in your arms, he tells himself to be tender. To be the man his dad never was.

And they're soft. So fuckin’ soft. Tiny, too. His hands dwarf them, engulfing them completely. He tries to blame the way he trembles on the denial of nicotine for so long, but the mist in his eyes, and the burn in his throat, call him a liar. He doesn't know what to do. Even with all the hours spent thumbing through manuals and books and scoffing under his breath at the parenting courses you dragged him to (but paid rigid attention to every word the heavily bangled woman said to him), he feels lost. Unsure. The ground is shaky. Control slips. And that's maybe the crux of it all—

Babies can't be controlled. And it's the loss of this, what makes him whole, keeps him steady, that has him feeling rubber-limbed and fawn-like.

“Quiet, now,” he murmurs, and then winces at the rough drag of his voice in the silence of the room. Too firm, too forceful. All the gentleness he has in his bones was devoured by your greedy mouth when you cracked him open like the legs of a snow crab, marrow slurped up until he was hollow. Empty. His tenderness rests inside your belly. What else does he have to give—

But the warm bundle in his awkward, clumsy hold stops their shrill cries. A girl, he remembers you saying. Crying. Sobbing into the phone when he called, all ugly and gross. He heard you sniffle, snot undoubtedly dribbling from your nose as you wept to him about how fucking cute their baby was. Their little girl.

She's soft. Smells of a newborn, too—something powdery. Sweet. Warmed milk, fresh bread. The clinical books that made you squeamish, the ones that outlined every anatomical and chemical change to your body, mentioned that newborns smelled distinct to each parent. A phenomenon meant to encourage protection and bonding.

It made you shiver, muttering my little parasite under your breath, even as your hand curved possessively over your bulging belly.

He knows that's what this is. Chemical. His mind is evolving, shifting. Changing. And it's then that he feels something hot thicken in his throat. Something ugly, and bitter. The scars on his knuckles, the cigarette burns on his fingers are a sharp reminder of what his father felt and ignored.

He scoffs, then, irritated at himself. He's a grown man and still—

Still thinks of him.

“Won't be like that,” he says, still rough. Still firm. She blinks up at him, eyes rheumy and wide. “Not with you.”

Never. Never. He pins the word to his pericardium, letting it rot his tissue. He'd rather die, he thinks, than ever hurt this little girl. But despite that, he knows he will. Inevitably. Just like he does everything good—or bad—in his life. Leaching from the goodness of others, sucking them dry and letting them moulder. A disappointment everywhere except the battlefield where he screams himself hollow and rents the air with his ire. Incorrigible. Immovable. An object of cruelty. Unforgiving in all aspects. A curse that follows him home, into his marital bed when he pins you down, and makes you profess your love for the beast inside of him. Never satiated, never quelled, until you're shackled at his side. Tucked away from the world he knows is too cruel to people like you who end up a corpse he has to step over on his way for empty retribution.

He thinks, too, about all the ways he's going to ruin this chubby little thing in his arms, and wishes, suddenly, he was a better man.

“Gonna hate my fuckin' guts when you're sixteen, aren't you?” In response, this little thing just opens its red maw and blows bubbles. He huffs. “You're gonna be nothin’ but trouble, mm? Steal my car. Crash it because your mum's gonna teach you how to drive and she backed into the garage six times already. Gonna gang up on me. Both of you. Little nightmares.”

He's not sure what else to say, and thinks, already, that he said too much. Bared his belly to her too soon. She'll have this memory, buried down in the deep recesses of her psyche of her father falling to pieces while he held her. An impossibility, he knows, but can't shake the feeling that this, in itself, is an epoch. A marker for what's to come. All the ugly, the hate. The screaming matches that make him curl his hand into fists as she levels his failures at him. Not to hit. Never to hit. But to stop the tremble that won't stop. That has already started. The shake in his joints that tell him to run before he hurts. Before he ruins this precious mass of his blood and your tissue in his arms.

“Gonna—” he isn't crying. Isn't. But there's a thickness in his throat as he thinks about how quickly she'll grow up. Age marked in the crows feet that gather around your eyes. The laugh lines. “Gonna be a fuckin' menace, and I'll—” he chokes, then, when she reaches up with a pudgy, red fist and snags the strap of his vest he didn't even bother taking off before he fled here. Fat, tiny fingers curling into the spot he grabs to ground himself from lashing out. “Fuck.”

He'd burn the world for her, he knows. Sacrifice everyone and everything just to keep her warm. Both of you. It begins and ends with this little thing that has your eyes and his nose.

But he doesn't know how to translate that into love. Into affection.

It comes out caustic. Abrasive. Possessive.

And he is.

Now that he has her in his hands he knows that nothing else will ever compare. That they'll never be empty because she'll always fit in his palms no matter how big she gets. There's only ever been enough space in his heart for you. Chiselled into with a fuckin’ pickaxe because you wouldn't wait for it to grow on its own.

But there's give, he realises. This domicile you carved yourself has a room attached. A place for her. And she fits like a glove. Sliding inside. Cocooned against his pulse.

He loves her. Endlessly. Forever. She deserves better. More.

But when he tells her this, she makes a noise and it sounds like a giggle.

“Laughin’ at me already, mm?”

She giggles again, and he likes that her laugh is a little ugly. A little mean.

“Scarin’ the wits outta me,” he confesses, shifting her weight as she occupies herself with the clasp of his vest, disinterested in the man that breaks into pieces around her now. “I don't know—fuck, I don't—”

You come to in a panic. It starts as a slow roll to the side before your eyes flash open, wide and furious even as sleep congeals in the corners, pawing at the empty spot where the lingering warmth of your child presses into your chest. Anger, fury, darkens over your brow, and the apoplectic rage that simmers in the gaps of your dread, your fostering panic, softens him. Makes him melt. The burn of your ire, your fear, liquifying his bones.

He falls in love with you a little bit more at that moment. When the snarl rucks your upper lip up, up, teeth bared to the world as you whip your head around in frantic, desperate dismay, searching for the little girl he knows you, too, will burn the world for.

“I've got her,” he says, whisper-soft and low. Cadence even, clear. Tries to quell the howl he can see hammering its fists against your throat before it rips from your lips and scorches the world around you in a hail of horrifying anguish. “She's safe.”

It says something when you immediately go still at the sound of his voice, muscles going lax, slack, as you slowly turn your head toward him, blinking against the fog clotting your vision. Something that cuts him to the core. Rents his chest in halves. One side for you, and the other for her. Nothing left to spare.

This feeling brimming in his chest sweetens when you startle at the sight of him, them, lashes shuttering like an old camera as if you were trying to sear the image in your head forever. Branded on the back of your eyelids. (A sentiment he knows all too well considering the stream of photos added to his camera roll of you and her nuzzled together.)

“You—” your voice catches, breaks from sleep. Fatigue. You swallow, slowly licking your lips. “When did you get in?”

Your eyes are glued to them. Unblinking. Widened with pure affection, the intensity of which makes him want to touch you, hold you.

“A few hours ago,” he murmurs, glancing down at his—

It cuts a jagged line through his chest. Knicks his bone with how deep it goes. False starts pressed tight to his heart.

—his daughter. Fuck’s sake.

He's choked. Strangled. Rendered mute, immobilised. It guts him, this. Daughter. The ring of it echoes in his head, filling the recesses of his mind. Embedding itself within his head. Congealed over. Fixed in place.

“I have a fuckin’ daughter,” he breathes at length, the air knocked from his lungs. He's not sure why this is what breaks him, but it does. And it's you, then, holding the fracturing pieces together, hands reaching out—in a startling mimicry of his daughter, and fuck, doesn't that just eviscerate him—and curling against the heaving brackets of his ribs, boxing him in.

“John,” you say, but your voice wobbles. Wavers. When he peels his eyes away from the sleepy yawn she lets out long enough to look at you, there's tears flooding your lashline. Threatening to break. “Fuck,” you say, crass and beautiful, and he's overcome with the urge to tuck you into his other arm, keep you both cradled in his hands. “Don't make me cry or my stitches will tug.”

“We've got a daughter,” he says again, just to hear it uttered aloud. We. Yours. His. It messes with him. Bludgeons into his core. “We've—”

“She's beautiful, isn't she?”

Your words shatter him, but the pinch of your hands on his waist keeps him from buckling.

“Yeah,” he rasps, voice thick. Ugly. It's mangled in his throat. All fractured and raw. “Just like her mother.”

He shows his affection in the burn of his embrace. In the way he holds you tight, refusing to let go. Keeps his words callous and firm. Soft utterances, declarations of love, tucked away in the sure, greedy way he clings to you in his sleep. Yields to you like no one else. Lets you in.

And he supposes he ought to say it more often if the way your face crinkles up just like his daughter when she cried, tears spilling over your rounded cheeks.

“Don't,” you heave, ugly and brittle, and he thinks you're the prettiest thing he'd ever seen in his life. “Don't or I'll rip my stitches—”

He huffs. Nods only once, and then steps toward you. “Do you want—?”

“Keep her for a little while,” you mutter, leaning back into the bed, eyes lidded by fond. So in love with him, the picture they paint, it's almost sickening. “She likes you.”

He snorts. “She's only three hours old. Give her time.”

You're quiet for a beat. Pensive. Mulling something over. It's never a good thing when you're silent, and the unease that grows in his belly is justified when you heave out a long, tired exhale through your nose.

The way you look at him is raw. “You're not your father, John.”

And isn't that just the worst lie he'd ever heard.

He scoffs, then. Shifts his weight, still cradling his daughter tight to his chest. “Mm, 'dunno about that.”

“I do.”

“Jus’—” leave it. Keep going. Keep feeding him lies as he stands here and pretends that he wasn't a horrible bastard for wanting this from you. From taking it. Strapping you with a man who's always, always, one foot out the door—

“No.” You say, soft and sure. “You're not him. I know you're not because you're still here.”

“So was he.”

You don't acknowledge the interruption. Content, it seems, to rattle off lies and half-truths into the stifling air. Your eyes close, the curve of your lashes leonine. Breathtaking.

“Do you want me to take her?” You ask instead of the multitude of things he can see piling behind your eyes. Some of the ugly. Jagged glass. Others powder soft.

He shakes his head. “You need your rest,” it's a half-truth. Fatigue clings to you still, swathed in the purpling of your skin. The slow, heavy blinks you take to try and fight the tug of an artificial sleep.

But the real reason is this:

He's just not ready to let her go.

Thinks, viciously, suddenly, that if he does, this moment built between them in budding, liquid blue will cease forever. Severed too soon. She'll carry the same resentment in her heart he feels for his own father, and he'll die in a shallow pit thinking about how badly he wanted just a second longer.

Generational, right? Trickle down hatred. Ancestral rage. It's what your grandma talks about sometimes over tea and fried bread, half disbelieving you brought a white man into her home, and making a show, a facade, of wisdom even though he spotted the how to raise a child notebook she hastily shoved into the kitchen drawer when you arrived. Taking over in place of your own mother, stepping up. And yet—

She just doesn't get it, you said, rubbing your hands over your belly when she steps away after another long-winded conversation about traditions, spirits, and dead languages. Raising a child like yours in a world like this. She's just. I don't know. Ignore her.

(He doesn't. But you don't have to know that.)

So. He clings to her a little tighter. Holds her a little firmer. Brings her close to his chest and hopes she can hear the echo of his heartbeat and know that this tired, old song is just for her.

(The heart itself for you—)

And maybe—

Maybe he's not quite ready to see you be a mother. Some perverse part of him is already trembling at the promise of watching you nurture and feed her, the tantalising whisper is enough to make the air in his lungs turn humid, sticky. Tar, you remind him sometimes, having seen the ugly spatter of black in the grainy photos the doctor in Hereford likes to shove at him. Never too late to reverse the damage, John.

Or maybe he wants you for himself just a moment longer. An hour. A day. When you're still you, shackled and bound to a man who reeks of stale tobacco, and started sneaking cigarettes in the dead of night like some pimply, awkward teenager when you first came to him, cheeks wet and eyes wild, and said:

“John, I'm—”

Pregnant.

He did it, of course. Put that baby in you. Made it with his teeth buried into your throat and your hips canting up to meet him, taking everything he had to offer. Animal aggression. Nothing tender in the way he chewed you up, made you beg him for it. But still—

Wanting and having are worlds apart, aren't they?

Faced with it, the consequences of his actions, he's at a standstill.

You hum, and when your eyes slide open, he feels the mallet against his head. Cracked open. You fossick about until you find what you're looking for. Cheeky fuckin’ thing—

“Fine. Just pull up a chair before you keel over, old man.”

“M’fine,” he grouses in that voice that serves as a dice roll between making you feel hot or homicidal depending on the mood he catches you in. Muttering something under your breath that sounds like a whispered plea for guidance (“tss, gimme strength.”)

But even with the waspish denial, he's inching closer to the spare chair left in the corner, looping his ankle around the leg to slide it closer. The squeal of rubber on aluminium makes him grimace, eyes darting down to his sleeping girl, nestled in his arms. Her brow pinches in the same way your grandma’s do when she's annoyed by the news. Her bingomates. The way he refuses her offering of burning tobacco and lemongrass whenever he goes away for a while, unable to really commit to this little, broken family that feels more like home than his own ever did.

(“aint my place,” he says, and she scoffs.

“fuck, s'matter wit’cha?” is her counter, the harsh line between her brows now perfectly superimposed on his daughter’s face. “tss. ain't yer place, eh. are you tryna piss me off? fuck, you make me mad—”)

He sees that spitting anger in you. Generational, he knows. The same inherited attitude his daughter will inevitably have. The one that singles him out as an outlier. Outnumbered. Three, now, to one—

There's got to be a reason why his chest bubbles, innervated by the thought of a Sunday dinner when she's old enough to watch her grandma make intricate bracelets, necklaces, earrings, and pins with thread and glass beads as you, her mother, cuss at the stove that doesn't burn as hot as it used to, flipping over golden dough in a sizzling pan.

Orange juice in old cups your grandma kept since the nineties. Something soft playing on the radio. The peeling, waterlogged wallpaper flakes off the wall when you slam the pan down too hard. The way the spill of the sun through the rusting window rents the room in half. Pale yellow and oak. Little orange blossoms in soft pink above the speckled granite countertops. Everything awash in a gossamer of sleepy-eyed affection.

Just like it is now. But—

He looks down at her, head full of lead. Cotton.

Complete, maybe.

“Don't know how to be a dad,” he confesses to you, and thinks of how much easier it is to slam a sledgehammer into a metal door than it is to peel back the veneer sometimes. “Don't want to mess up.”

“You'll be fine.”

The crinkle of the plastic mattress, the scratch of the sheets sliding across the bed is louder now than it was before. He cuts the gentle sounds with an abrading hum that clicks off his teeth.

“Get some sleep,” he says again instead of the awful truth that buoys in his throat. Things like you don't know and I tricked you this whole time into thinking I'm a good man and look what you’ve let me do to you. “You need it.”

Another noise. In his periphery, he watches you lean back against the upright pillows, lips parted on a soft sigh. He feels—

Small, then. An oxymoron considering he has to duck his head to get in and out of the room, towering over most he meets daily. But the inadequacies gut him. Vivisect him. He should be more comforting to you, he knows. This whole thing has been difficult. Tiresome. Cut into and having the life you grew inside of you cut out—

“Did good,” he rasps, still staring down at her even as he pulls the chair as close to your bed as he can get. “With her.”

You snort. It's inelegant. Ugly. Brittle, like you're holding back tears.

When he glances up, he finds that you are. “You're strong,” he adds, and knows he should have started with this first. “Doin’ this all on your own.”

“I had help.”

It's awkward trying to adjust himself in the seat with his daughter perched in his arms, but he finds a way. Settled, then, with her still sleeping away, he lifts his hand from her back, keeping her cradled in his arm with the other, and reaches for you.

The starchy sheets catch on the bramble of hair on his knuckles, the back of his hand, and the static jolts tickle against the rough scar tissue thickened over his knuckles, some still fresh, scabbed from the latest mission he'd been deployed to. You watch him, misty-eyed and tremulous, as he draws nearer, eyes flickering like a pendulum between the bundle nestled on the thick of his arm, to him, watching you back. Greedily taking in every spasm, every blink.

Something inside of him cracks. Softens. He thinks, breathless, that you've never been as beautiful to him as you are right now. Bubbles of snot in your nose. Eyes reddened, dropping from exhaustion. A dizzying mess. The sort that speaks of tireless work, of physicality. Muted pain brimming in the backs of your eyes when you pull on your stitches.

“Got a pretty wife,” he says, and it's not enough. He knows it isn't. Looks away before the fracture lilt to his tone breaks him in two. “And—” it's hard to say. He forces himself to. “And a beautiful daughter.”

The tears stream down your face at this quiet, clumsy admission.

“Don't—” you sniffle, hoarse. “Or I'll tear my stitches.”

“M’not doin' anythin’, love.”

“Fuck you, John—”

He leans back in his chair with a hum, eyes slipping shut. A brief respite amid the panic still clinging tight to his ribcage. “Love you too.”

It's quiet. Nothing but the soft drag of each breath his daughter takes, the tremulous sniffle you give as you try to dam the tears sliding down your cheeks. His heart hammering in his ears. He commits it all to memory. Glueing it to the fibrils of mind where it'll stay, embedded in tissue, for as long as he is of sound mind.

Much like the grainy, black-and-white ultrasounds stuffed in his breast pocket. Tucked inside the drawer of his desk where he keeps the pictures of you. Keepsakes he's unnecessarily possessive over, elbowing the rowdier men who try to needle him for sparse information on the little wife he hides at home and the baby they'll never meet. Something just for him. Unshareable to the rest of the world because they don't deserve you.

The feathered snores tell him you're finally asleep, and he thinks about resting for a moment as well—the bone-deep exhaustion he feels jetting from Iceland to home, to the hospital catches up to him with a vicious kick to temples—but the weight in his arm keeps him awake. Hyperviligent.

There's this urge clawing at him, making ruins of his chest, and he answers its worried insistence by opening his eyes just a sliver to stare down at the little bundle in his arms only to find she's staring back at him. Eyes wide. Comically too big for her chubby face.

She has your complexion, but his dark curls. Her eyes, though, are the perfect equilibrium between pools of sapphire, burnt blue, marbled with the dark gleam, that vibrant shade of yours that he's so fond of, the one that's often accompanied by a smart-ass remark. Seeing it gaze up at him with such incipient adoration knocks the air from his lungs. Has his heart shuddering in the brackets of his chest.

It's love, he thinks first. Instantaneous. Apodictic. And then, cold, callous—

Chemical.

Just to hurt himself, maybe. Just to let it cut deep. Scar. Because as he stares down at her, he knows it doesn't matter. No amount of hatred, of anger, will ever rip her away from him. His daughter. His family. His.

Like her mother. The root of it all. The catalyst. The start.

Shackled to this gaping chasm that devours endlessly, never satiated. Always starving.

Needy. Full of greed.

Because even now he covets. Craves. Muses to himself about how he can convince you to have another the moment the opportunity arises and you're healed. Whole. Aching for it.

He wasn't joking when he said he wanted a football team.

But for now—

The soft sighs you make in your sleep, ones that almost sound like his name, and the comforting weight of his daughter in his arms are enough to make the beast inside purr. Preening under its own conquest, its own victory of successfully turning your body into a home he can rest his weary head on. Sacrosanct.

He looks at her, then, and feels the dread ease into pride. Into elation. An emotion he knows should have come first, but it's here now, and that's all that really matters.

“Gonna be trouble,” he grouses, watching her pink mouth gape wide, blood-red maw grinning up at him in delirious glee only babies can imbue. Unhindered by the ruination of the world around them. Unfettered.

Something he couldn't protect you from, but knows you're both on the same wavelength when it comes to her. At all costs, you'd said, hand against the burgeoning swell. And he kissed you until he couldn't feel his lips anymore. Until all he tasted, all he knew, was the taste of you.

“Of the best kind, though, mm?”

In response, she coos. And he hews the sound into his chest where it sits beside the brand of when you first said, i love you, too, John.

So, he relaxes. Whispers soft, conspiratorily. "Think you might need'a brother, mm? What'd you say about that?"

And she giggles.

#john price x reader #captain price x reader #i am at a loss for words #this is gross and sappy mlahhhhh #sprinkled with the slightest indigeneity #captain john price x reader

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wileys-russo · 4 months ago

Text

spoiled rotten (3) II a.putellas

part of the spoiled rotten universe spoiled rotten (3) II a.putellas

"alexia? baby you do know she is not going to disappear if you take your eyes off of her for five seconds." you teased quietly, poking your head into your daughters room and finding your girlfriend sat in the feeding chair watching the eight month old like a hawk.

"sh! amor you will wake her." your girlfriend warned with a frown, face softening at the eyebrow raised her way as you carefully padded into the room, sitting down on her lap as her arms wound their way around your waist.

an apologetic kiss was pressed to your shoulder as you joined the blonde in staring adoringly at the tiny bundle of pink skin and ringlets of dark brown hair, swaddled tightly in a cream colored blanket.

"she is so tiny." you exhaled with a soft smile, alexia's chin finding home on your shoulder with a hum of agreement. you weren't sure how long the two of you sat there for, alexia holding you tightly as you relaxed into the welcoming warmth of her embrace.

this little habit of hers wasn't anything new, and these days any time you couldn't find the footballer all it took was a few steps into your daughters room and there she'd be, staring at her with a fierce love in her eyes you'd never seen before the birth of amalia.

to the pair of you and your inner circle of loved ones you called her lia, much to the thrilled delight of your niece layla who was convinced that lia was as close to her own name as you could get which must mean amalia was named after her.

your sister discouraged the thought but neither you or alexia minded, lala and lia, both of their nicknames within the family, seemed an adorable pairing and your heart swelled whenever you watched how patient and gentle the usually bubbly and hyperactive eight year old was with your daughter.

the first time layla had held lia you were so overcome with hormones and emotions you needed to leave the room in tears, ingrid hurrying after you as mapi was too busy chewing your girlfriends ear off about how that must mean you wanted another baby.

as much as alexia adored amalia you didn't miss the way her face paled anytime a second baby was mentioned and found it endlessly amusing to tease her about just getting the baby stage out of the way with another one at the same time.

alexia would laugh nervously and you'd grin, kissing away her awkward smile and assuring you were only teasing. you knew one little baby for the pair of you to stress and worry over was enough for the time being.

and it wasn't a lie.

stress and worry went hand in hand when it came to you and alexia trying to work out how to navigate parenthood for the first time, overwhelmed with tips and wives tales and stories and tricks from both of your entire families.

the first month of amalia's life was chaotic to say the least.

your own mother flew over from england to be there for the birth to support you, eli insisting she stay with her and suddenly the date of her return flight home was pushed further and further away.

then between the pair of them for those first four weeks neither you or your girlfriend seemed to have a minute alone with your own daughter.

both older women seemed to spend every spare second they could hovering and cuddling and kissing and fussing and cooing over the tiny infant, and at first it was helpful, then it very quickly grew to be painful.

it felt as if nothing you or alexia did was right. you'd change lias diaper, one of them would swoop in and redo it, assuring you their way was better.

alexia would try to swaddle her before bed, just like the both you had learned in prenatal classes and practiced for months leading up to the birth.

but it never seemed to be tight enough or right enough for either of your mothers, who would again just redo it with an unintentionally condescending click of the tongue.

your own attempts to softly urge them back to their own homes and your mother back to england were dismissed with a wave of their hands assuring it was absolutely fine and no trouble at all.

and you were sure it wasn't trouble for them, however it was becoming unbearable for yourself and alexia, the once perfectly spacious apartment you shared feeling suffocatingly small with two more overbearing and uninvited tenants.

eventually, when your softer approach hadn't worked alexia had stepped in and put her foot down firmly with the pair of them. the blonde wouldn't take no for an answer, practically pushing both women out and deadlocking the door, the two of you sharing a smile and then bursting out into laughter at the much welcome silence.

though both you and your girlfriend were fiercely fiercely protective of amalia, alexia was particularly strict when it came to introducing her to new people.

or more specifically, introducing her formally to the rest of the barcelona squad bar amalias godparents who'd all but charged your door down a few days after you brought her home, mapi threatening to kick it in if you didn't let her and ingrid inside.

you knew the rest of the girls had been begging alexia to meet amalia, mainly because that begging was done through you knowing that bar your daughter you were the only other person able to melt the stern faced captain like butter.

so almost three months after she was born, alexia finally agreed to let you bring amalia to the training centre, both of you already in agreement that a football match was no place for a newborn, both you and amalia watching most of alexia's games at home on tv.

most weekends eli or alba would offer to babysit so you could go and watch in person, though it took a lot to convince either of you to leave your daughter alone with someone who wasn't you or alexia.

but leaving amalia with family was a little easier, and your own family spent a lot of time flying back and forth between england and spain to visit as well, though you think a lot of that you could thank alexia for as the girl knew sometimes you grew homesick and would encourage the invitation.

many times she'd tried to organise for the three of you to go back to england, but you were firm on your stance you wanted amalia to get a little older before putting her through the stress of a flight and a holiday.

you smiled in amusement as you caught sight of your girlfriend waiting for you by the gate, pulling open the car door before you'd even stopped properly and sliding into the back beside amalia's carseat.

you cleared your throat as your daughter was showered with kisses and you were not, alexia smiling guiltily and leaning forward over the console to greet you as well, apologizing softly against your lips.

"should we take the stroller?" you asked after you'd parked, amalia bundled up in alexia's arms in a little barcelona onesie, and seeing the way your girlfriends face lit up at the sight of it melted your heart.

"no, they will all want to hold her anyway." alexia rolled her eyes and you chuckled, locking the car and clicking your tongue at the girl who grabbed the baby bag off of you.

"cariño i can carry something!" you insisted as the midfielder shook her head, shutting up your protests with a kiss as the pair of you made your way through the carpark toward the elevator.

"oh did someone have a good nap today princesa? tan soñoliento!" alexia cooed, bouncing lia with a soft smile as you leaned your head on the taller girls shoulder, both of you watching as she started to wake up a little more.

with lia sleeping about 14-16 hours a day ideally, there were slim windows when you could take her out and about, and her little puffy face after she'd just woken up never failed to melt both you and alexia.

it was safe to say that despite the firm boundaries you'd put in with your girlfriend not spoiling your niece, all of that went out the window when it came to your daughter, both you and alexia buying anything and everything for the tiny brunette.

"sí that is your mami's nose!" you laughed as lia grabbed at alexia's face, blowing a spit bubble as alexia blew a raspberry on her cheek and she gave a gummy smile.

"su pelo crece tan rápido!" the blonde marveled, twirling a small ringlet of hair wide eyed as lia babbled and grabbed her nose again, the elevator stopping at the right floor and you hummed.

everyday without fail one of you point out the inevitable fact that your daughter was changing. if it be her hair was thicker, a new freckle appeared, an item of clothing seemed marginally tighter.

and there was nothing either of you found more overwhelmingly beautiful than baring witness to the tiny human being you'd both created growing up before your very eyes.

you'd both been making an effort to speak english and spanish around her as much as possible, wanting her to grow up able to speak both despite the fact she'd be living in spain, but england was still home for you and alexia wanted that for amalia as well.

"amor maybe it is too soon." alexia stopped suddenly, a few feet from the closed changing room door with nerves painted clearly into her features, eyebrows furrowed into a frown of uncertainty.

"hey, ale. baby." you nudged her shoulder as her eyes dropped down toward you. "lia brings us so much joy, it would be mean not to share that with everyone else. you know they will be careful and gentle, but they will also be very very excited!" you smiled reassuringly as your girlfriend nodded, still seemingly hesitant.

"give her to me. you can go in first, make sure everything is fine and we will come in once you're happy. okay?" your hand tenderly caressed her cheek as again the blonde nodded, pressing an appreciative soft kiss to your lips and slipping amalia into your awaiting arms.

"well if it is not my favorite little god daughter!" you were pulled from your thoughts at the voice behind you, turning to see ingrid walking toward you, her ankle taped up.

"i just rolled it during training. it is nothing too bad!" she assured watching your face crease with concern as you noticed, cooing her hello's at amalia as she gave you a side hug careful not to bump her.

"so you have been taken off of house arrest?" the norweigan grinned making you laugh, ingrid poking at your daughters feet and beaming at the little giggles which she was rewarded with.

"mm she is probably in there making them all wash their hands five times and form an orderly line." you chuckled knowing your girlfriend all too well, the girl in question poking her head out of the change rooms and calling your name.

"oye! cata no you put that down!" she darted right back inside with a yell making both you and ingrid share a look and grin. you heard chatter as ingrid pushed open the door for you, but everything fell silent as you and amalia stepped inside, many pairs of eyes trained on the two of you.

then suddenly it erupted, everyone cooing and fussing and crowding around you, ignoring your girlfriend trying to boss them all back into line and yelling at them to be quiet, basically talking to the walls as not a soul was listening to a word she said.

glancing over to her you very carefully handed amalia over to frido, mapi and ingrid both assuring you they would keep a close eye over their goddaughter as you gently pushed your way out of the crowd.

"hola grumpy." you teased at your girlfriend sat on the bench with a face like thunder, eyes still sharply trained to your daughter but they flickered to you as her lip curled downward into a slight pout and you took a seat next to her.

"te dije que estarían emocionados." you reminded softly, alexia just crossing her arms over her chest, watching as your daughter was passed around and marveled over, mapi staying right by her side the entire time.

"like the lion king." you joked quietly bumping your hip into the footballers, both of you having watched the movie in question easily a hundred times over the years given it was your niece layla's all time favourite.

"if any of them lifts her up like that-" alexia began to stand as you tugged on the back of her training top sending her back down onto the bench.

"they won't. look, mapi is right with her and you know she would not let anybody harm a single hair on amalia's head. remember the cafe?" you reminded as alexia pulled a face.

it had been one of the first times you'd taken lia out in public since she was born, you and alexia meeting mapi and ingrid for breakfast not far from your apartment.

everything had been going well and after lots of cuddles from her godmothers lia was soundly asleep in her stroller which was safely tucked in between you and alexia.

it had all happened in seconds.

there had been two young boys riding skateboards, not watching where they were going they'd gone flying past and almost knocked a poor waitress over who accidentally spilled a coffee all over you, a few drops landing on amalia and the noise of everything jolting her awake, her cries sounding loudly as alexia scooped her up.

before anyone could even speak mapi was up and on her feet, charging over toward the boys and yelling at them in spanish so fast even you and ingrid struggled to understand what was being said.

you assured the waitress over and over it wasn't her fault, the horrified young girl in tears as ingrid stood up to collect her girlfriend who was still telling off the boys who'd gone ghost white in embarrassment, backed against a wall as the footballer yelled at them.

you stomped on your own girlfriends foot and send her a harsh look, nodding toward the poor girl still with tears in her eyes as alexia sighed and gently assured her it was fine, and that it had just spooked your daughter but she was entirely unharmed.

"i do not think those boys will ever touch a skateboard again." alexia hummed at the memory, the ghost of a smile on her lips as her arms uncrossed, one draping across your shoulders as your hand rested on her knee.

"look at her mi amor, she is so so loved, surrounded by her tías."

neither of you were surprised that after such a big day of meeting people amalia was barely able to keep her eyes open when you got home, the pair of you taking turns to try and keep her awake for at least another hour as if she fell asleep now she'd be up around two in the morning.

"-and bebita do you know why your mama and i love each other so much?" you paused by the door to your daughters room, melting at the sight of alexia laid down on the floor with amalia sat up on her chest, supported by your girlfriends strong hands.

"because of you! nuestro amorcita. together with our love we gave each other you, and we love you bebita! muy muy muy muy mucho." alexia cooed softly, kissing your daughters little hands as she squealed.

"the most perfect little girl in the world." you agreed, alexia looking up with a lovesick smile as you entered the room, laying down beside her as your girlfriend bounced amalia up and down on her chest.

"it really suits you, being a mami." you complimented, kissing your girlfriends cheek and watching as a slight blush crept up her neck, relishing in the fact you pulled this more shy and softer side out of her.

"does this mean you want to call me mami too?" the blonde gave you a wolfish grin, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively as you rolled your eyes.

"do you smell that?" you sniffed the air, alexia frowning and pulling amalia a little closer, smelling her clean diaper. "not the bebita." the catalan shook her head, clearly confused.

"oh! no, lo siento it is the smell of your shitty flirting." you warned and hit her shoulder, amalia giggling and blowing a spit bubble.

"oh do you think that is funny lia?" you cooed, flicking alexia's ear as again amalia giggled. "your silly mami thinks she is so funny too!" you harshly pinched alexias cheek as she whined and amalia gave a gummy smile, smacking her hands down on your girlfriends chest.

"ya me están atacando." the blonde mumbled with a pout that you leaned over and softly kissed away. "mmm get used to it putellas." you teased with a wink, turning your shared attention back to your daughter.

you smiled and waved, alexia using amalia's little hand to wave back as she stood in the pool, your daughter safely in her arms as the instructor called out they were about to begin.

"so she has no idea?" alba asked quietly beside you as you shook your head, a grin of delight on your face making the younger girl chuckle. "oh she is going to kill you chica." alba mused with a shake of her head and a smile on her lips.

"eres mujer muerta." "mm maybe, worth it though." you winked, both you and alba waving wildly at amalia as alexia moved into the circle of other mothers.

you'd both been in agreement you wanted amalia to learn how to swim as soon as possible, given that you and alexia loved the beach and she did too, and you hoped growing up your daughter would continue a love for the water.

normally you would be the one to take amalia to the mami and me swimming lessons due to alexia's training schedule, but feeling an enormous sense of fomo alexia had made an arrangement with the club to finish early every second tuesday so the pair of you could take turns.

skin to skin contact was so important while amalia was little and even if she wouldn't directly admit it you knew alexia had deep seeded insecurities about not spending enough time with her in that way.

she'd floated the idea of having less commitments, but you knew football meant the world to her in a different way and she was years off retiring, and you'd support her in anyway possible.

so compromise was key, and you did everything you could to assure she had every single opportunity to bond with your daughter, never taking for granted that you had it easier with being home with her most days.

"-and now we will sing the swimming song!" you and alba stopped your conversation at that announcement, grinning at each other and watching your girlfriends face drop.

"it has been nice knowing you, i will make sure lia grows up knowing her mama loved her." alba sighed squeezing your knee as you laughed and shoved the younger girl, alexia shooting you a beyond murderous look as the backing track started.

"today we go swim! today we go swim! what do we need? before we get in! what do we need? before we get in!" the instructor sang, clapping along to the beat as all the other women in the pool bounced their babies and sang along.

"our shoes come off! our shoes come off! we put our swim cap on! our swim cap on!" the song continued as you and alba clapped along, the younger putellas recording on her phone as your girlfriend was beet red, merely mumbling the words as the song repeated itself.

"lia's mami we can't hear you!" the instructor cooed and you collapsed into alba covering your mouth as your girlfriend was put on the spot, the other mothers turning to look at her as alba grinned and zoomed in.

"eh our shoes come off! our shoes come off! swim cap on! swim cap on!" alexia sang loudly but very off key, cheeks as bright red as the crest of the barcelona towel sat at your feet awaiting its use later on, you and alba near choking at trying to contain your laughter as the instructor turned and cleared her throat with an unimpressed look your way.

"and now the dance break! bounce your bebitas chicas, bounce them and dance with them!" the instructor called out as alexia's ears went bright red watching everyone take turns one by one to dance in the middle of the circle, how was this considered a swimming lesson?

you'd not seen your girlfriend look as relieved as she did when the song finally finished, not even after the final whistle at a champions league final and you thought just maybe she'd have rather had a million and one eyes on her to take a penalty than the fifteen or so women mulling around the pool.

"hola sexy!" you whistled with a wink as a soaking wet alexia made her way out of the pool and toward you, alba having left already picked up by a friend for a dinner date.

you bit back your grin as your girlfriend stayed silent, shooting you a filthy look and snatching the towel offered her way, stomping off toward the showers to dry and change amalia as you sent a text to her sister asking for the videos she'd taken.

around fifteen minutes later alexia returned, changed into a pair of shorts and a hoodie, hair damp and pushed to one side of her head with amalia wrapped up in a little hooded giraffe towel your sister had gifted you when she was born.

"no." the girl grunted as you cooed at how utterly adorable your daughter looked, trying to take her off the footballer who scowled at you and stomped off out of the pool, making you chuckle as you quickly followed after her.

stopping to pay for the lesson by the time you got to the car amalia was already buckled in, alexia tickling her stomach with a sickeningly soft smile at the little giggles it rewarded her with.

however as you arrived the scowl returned to her features as she closed the door and slid into the drivers seat. but as you tried to do the same you frowned when the door was locked, trying to pull it open with a grunt.

"alexia! mi amor open the door." you tapped on the window with a laugh of realisation that she'd locked you out, raising an eyebrow at her behaviour.

"baby come on, let me in por favor." you asked with a smile, the blondes gaze remaining firmly forward not even sparing you a look. "okay! well i gave you the chance." you sighed, clearing your throat and stepping back a little from the car.

"today we go swim! today we go swim!" you started to sing very loudly, alexia's head whipping toward you with wide eyes, your arms gesturing up to the sky as a few people around in the carpark looked at you like you were crazy.

"what do we need? before we get in? a dance break!" you announced, wiggling and moving your body around like a madwoman as alexia's eyebrows shot up so fast they almost hit the roof of the car.

"aye dios mio, get in tonta!" alexia reached over to unlock and open the door, stretching out to hook a finger through the belt loop of your jean shorts and yank you down into the car.

you could barely contain your laughter at the sheer horror on her face as you closed your door, grabbing onto the seats as she sped off out of the carpark and you hurried to click your seat belt in.

"stop laughing at her mija, you will encourage her!" alexia huffed, turning around to give your daughter a playful glare as she continued to clap and giggle at the way you continued to dance in your seat.

"mama is a terrible dancer."

"cariño are you really going to be all pouty and grumpy all afternoon?" you laughed, returning to the bedroom after getting amalia down for her last nap of the day before bed, finding alexia tucked under the covers with a sour look on her face.

her plans to go for a run had been squished by the sky opening, the rain torrential outside as water drops splattered angrily against the window panes of your apartment.

"aleee." you cooed, crawling on top of her and sitting yourself down on her lap, the girl looking right through you with a straight face. "venga mi amor you cannot stay mad at me." you grinned, thumbs stroking over her eyebrows and trying to tug them out of the steel frown they were curved into.

"alexiaaa, vamos. smile!" your thumbs moved to try and squish her mouth into a smile, her eyes finally finding yours with an evil look. "you will get wrinkles if you frown too much abuela." you teased, her mouth forming a small o.

"no! ale!" you laughed as she tried to shove you off, wrestling with her to stay on top as your arms locked around her neck. "abuela! wrinkles!" the catalan scoffed repeatedly, a noise of surprise leaving your mouth as suddenly she flipped the two of you.

"you did not tell me there was singing!" your girlfriend huffed, pinning you down to the bed with another scowl as you smiled up at her. "you did not ask." you wiggled a hand free and poked at her nose as the footballer groaned dramatically and flopped down on top of you.

"alba is going to show everyone those videos." her words were muffled against your skin as her head tucked its way into your neck and she felt your body vibrate with amusement beneath her, arms slipping up the back of her shirt and nails scratching at her back.

"sí, and they will see what a good mami you are amor, spending quality time with our daughter and teaching her how to swim." you assured gently, alexias head shooting up and frowning down at you.

"swimming! there was no swimming princesa! only singing, and floating, and dancing and ugh, humillación." she flopped back down making you laugh at her dramatics.

"she is not even half a year old baby, surely you did not expect her to be doing laps?" you teased, squirming at her fingers which pinched at your side, rolling off of you slightly as you ducked your head and pecked her lips repeatedly.

"is this your way of saying sorry?" "no, it was worth it to see how red your little cheeks went in embarrassment. but i think we need to work on your dancing for next time!" you teased, squealing at her cold fingers which poked at your side.

"no no no ale please!" you tried to dart away, her hand catching the back of your shorts and yanking you back down onto the bed. "say sorry!" your girlfriend demanded, sitting on top of you as you squirmed and begged for her to stop, fingers tickling at your side and your shirt half over your face as you tried to wiggle down the bed to get away.

"i'm sorry!" you gave in with a breathy laugh, alexia's frown now gone and replaced with the same stupid lovesick grin mapi was always teasing her for having when she was around you.

"dilo en español." your girlfriend smirked, digging a finger beneath your armpit as your face went bright red and your stomach ached. "lo siento!" you managed out, exhaling and trying to catch your breath as finally she stopped, sliding off of you as you halfheartedly smacked her and she sighed, head tucking into your neck again as she pulled you close.

"amor i think the worst part is i am going to have that stupid song stuck in my head for weeks!"

#alexia putellas imagine #alexia putellas x reader #woso x reader #woso fanfics #woso imagine #woso blurbs

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sofiatarot · 1 month ago

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What legacy will I leave in my career and in the world? PAC READING

TIP JAR - FREE READINGS - PAID READINGS

Let’s explore how your art influences the world. I believe everything can be art in its potential and essence—whether it's something literal, like an artistic creation, or any career or path you’ve chosen. Your life is your art, and you are the artist.

We’ll look at how your career affects the world, either directly or indirectly.

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Little note: I’m aware of the old belief that only "famous" or public figures can leave a mark or create a before-and-after impact. But let me clarify: we are all here for a reason. Each of us contributes to either the improvement or decline of the world. We all hold the same level of importance and impact on a soul/spirit level. Everything else is just appearances.

Please always remember that what you do matters, and by following your passion, you are energetically helping and contributing to the world. We are all responsible for creating a new world—heaven on Earth.

Group 1:

Your legacy will be one of resilience, strategy, and transformation. You’re someone who has faced challenges with cleverness and a sharp mind, using your struggles as opportunities to rise above. The impact you leave on the world will stem from your ability to outmaneuver obstacles and show others how to adapt in difficult situations.

You are a visionary, someone who turns ideas into action. Your career will reflect bold, strategic moves that inspire others to take charge of their own destiny. The world will remember you as someone who took calculated risks and proved that intelligence and creativity can overcome even the harshest circumstances.

Your work is deeply rooted in truth, even when it’s uncomfortable. The heartbreaks and setbacks you’ve endured have only strengthened your determination to create something meaningful. While others may have faltered, you’ve used those experiences to fuel your purpose, teaching others to find strength in their vulnerability.

You are a leader who balances charisma with grounded wisdom. People are drawn to your confidence and warmth, and you’ll leave a legacy of empowerment, especially for those who felt unseen or undervalued. Your career will inspire others to embrace their unique qualities and step into their own light.

However, the journey hasn’t been without its sacrifices. You’ve faced periods of disconnection, where collaboration felt more like a burden than a joy. Yet these moments have taught you how to stand firm in your vision, reminding others that independence and collaboration can coexist.

Your legacy will also involve bridging gaps and building foundations. Whether through literal structures or metaphorical ones, your career will leave behind a sense of stability and progress. You’ve taught the world that true success requires both careful planning and the courage to act.

Your emotional depth is one of your greatest strengths, but it hasn’t always been easy to manage. At times, your passion has felt overwhelming or misdirected, but your willingness to face these emotions head-on has turned them into powerful tools of expression and connection.

You will be remembered as someone who brought people together, even when the odds seemed impossible. Your work will foster unity and understanding, teaching the importance of collaboration and shared vision.

Ultimately, your legacy will shine as a testament to resilience, transformation, and the power of a determined spirit. You’ve proven that even in the face of adversity, it’s possible to create something lasting and profound.

Group 2:

Your legacy is one of hope, healing, and the reclamation of power. You have walked through darkness and emerged stronger, and the world will remember you as a beacon for those who feel lost or defeated.

You’re a bridge between the past and the future. Your career is rooted in nostalgia and the lessons of history, yet it also pushes boundaries and redefines what is possible. This duality makes your work timeless, resonating across generations.

Your creative spark is undeniable, and your passion for growth and learning inspires others to take chances and embrace new opportunities. Even in moments of doubt, you’ve persevered, proving that beginnings and endings are all part of the same journey.

At times, your career has been shaped by power struggles and moments of uncertainty. These challenges have taught you the value of integrity and humility. You’ve learned that true authority comes from within, and your ability to rise above external pressures will leave an indelible mark.

Your legacy will include breaking societal norms and redefining success. You’re not afraid to challenge expectations, and your work reflects a balance between personal freedom and responsibility. This fearless approach will inspire others to embrace their individuality.

Your ability to adapt and rebuild will be a central theme in your career. Even when faced with failure or setbacks, you’ve found ways to pivot and keep moving forward. This resilience will show others that no situation is ever truly final.

You have a magnetic presence that draws people to you, but it hasn’t always been easy to manage. At times, your charisma has been misunderstood or underestimated, yet it’s precisely this complexity that makes your work so impactful.

You will leave behind a legacy of liberation—helping others free themselves from limiting beliefs and societal expectations. Your career will serve as a roadmap for anyone seeking to reclaim their power and redefine their identity.

Ultimately, your work will be remembered as a source of light in dark times, proving that healing and transformation are possible no matter the circumstances.

Group 3

Your legacy will be one of introspection, wisdom, and quiet power. You are a seeker of truth, someone who has delved deeply into life’s mysteries and emerged with profound insights. The world will remember you as a guide for those navigating their own paths.

Your career is marked by cycles of growth and reflection. You’ve embraced change as a necessary part of life, showing others that even setbacks can lead to new opportunities. This perspective will inspire many to keep moving forward, no matter the obstacles.

Creativity is at the heart of your legacy, but it hasn’t always been straightforward. You’ve faced blocks and moments of doubt, yet these experiences have only deepened your understanding of what it means to create authentically.

Your work challenges conventional ideas and explores themes that others might shy away from. You’re unafraid to confront the shadows, using your career as a platform to shed light on the hidden or misunderstood aspects of life.

You have a unique ability to balance intuition with logic, blending emotional depth with intellectual rigor. This combination makes your work both deeply personal and universally relevant, touching hearts and minds alike.

Your legacy will include breaking down barriers—whether cultural, emotional, or intellectual. You’ve shown that vulnerability and strength can coexist, and this message will resonate long after your career has ended.

At times, your path has been solitary, but this solitude has only strengthened your connection to your inner wisdom. You’ve used these moments to create work that is deeply meaningful, offering guidance to those who feel lost or disconnected.

You will be remembered as someone who brought clarity to confusion and hope to despair. Your work will serve as a reminder that even in the darkest times, there is always a way forward.

Ultimately, your legacy is one of transformation and enlightenment, leaving a lasting impact on those who encounter your work.

Group 4

Your legacy is one of empowerment, discipline, and mastery. You are a force to be reckoned with, and the world will remember you as someone who harnessed their power to create lasting change.

Your career is built on hard work and dedication. You’ve shown that success doesn’t come overnight but is the result of consistent effort and unwavering commitment. This message will inspire generations to pursue their dreams with determination.

You are a natural leader, someone who isn’t afraid to take charge and make tough decisions. Your work reflects this strength, and others will look to you as a model of confidence and capability.

Your ability to balance ambition with compassion is one of your greatest strengths. You’ve taught the world that success isn’t just about individual achievement but also about lifting others along the way.

At times, you’ve faced temptations or distractions, yet your ability to stay focused and disciplined has set you apart. This resilience will leave a lasting impression, showing others the importance of staying true to their goals.

Your career will include moments of collaboration and celebration, where your ability to bring people together shines. You’ll be remembered for creating spaces of joy and unity, teaching others the value of community and shared success.

You are deeply intuitive, even when you don’t always trust yourself. Over time, you’ve learned to listen to your inner voice, and this wisdom will guide others to do the same.

Your work challenges societal norms, pushing the boundaries of what’s possible and encouraging others to think outside the box. You’ll leave a legacy of innovation and progress, paving the way for future generations.

Ultimately, your legacy will be one of empowerment and transformation, proving that with focus, discipline, and heart, anything is possible. You’ve shown the world the power of perseverance and the beauty of a life lived with purpose.

xoxo🦋

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