#Obey me headcanon

[beelanddiavolosimp-blog]

Asmos: "Hey Mc what type of kinks are you into hm? Maybe hair pulling?"

My Mc: "You ever pull my hair and I'll be ripping off every strand of yours."

Asmos: " 😦 "

She has a sensitive scalp...

[zephyrchama]

Going to a restaurant with the cast of Obey Me! and the waiter asks, "is anyone in your party under 500? Beings who are five centuries and under eat for free."

The waiter glances at Luke as they say this but everyone immediately turns to you.

Mammon cracks up when the waiter brings over a high chair and you have to turn them down. Leviathan encourages you to at least take the booster seat so you can feel taller. Thirteen wheezes when they bring out the crayons and coloring mat, which you insist on sharing. You tell Diavolo not to get any funny ideas when the waiter bends down to speak with you at eye level. It's just standard protocol for this diner.

Mephistopheles doesn't understand the big deal. You're not even a century old yet, isn't this normal? Solomon, however, is trying not let his mini midlife crisis show. To Barbatos' delight, he's not getting the same treatment as you (despite also being human) and fears he might be starting to look his age.

Lucifer is visibly enjoying himself way too much and hasn't stopped sneering since you were handed a children's menu, which Beelzebub is excitedly cross-referencing with the adult menu that everyone else got. Raphael likes the little flag they stuck in your food. Luke is acting so smug and haughty that Simeon has to remind him to be humble.

Satan makes the unnecessary offer to cut your food into smaller bites because they only gave you a small plastic spork, while Asmodeus is busy snapping pictures of the chef's ketchup smiley face atop your dish. Belphegor warns you not to hurt yourself and asks if he should blow on your food, causing you to threaten him with the spork.

[absolutepokemontrash]

I’m just imagining MC trying to curb the brothers’ more dangerous sinful urges, both for their own good and the good of the people around them, but it doesn’t always work out, and MC needs to settle for small victories.

Mammon: Gah! Human! It’s in my DNA! I’m hardwired to want things! I’m the demon of greed dammit! I want to steal!

MC: No! No theft!

Mammon: Not even one bit of grand larceny? ONE jewellery store???

MC: NO!

Mammon: MC-

MC: OH FOR THE LOVE OF- go rob that fucking vending machine to get the urges out! Shoo! Shoo!

Mammon: *grumbles on the way to shake the shit out of a vending machine*

——————

MC: So this is called Chess Boxing, you can stimulate your brain in between giving it blunt force trauma, and inflicting it on your opponent!

Satan: I don’t know, MC… I’m not sure if I’ll like i-

*elapsed time: 3 minutes*

Satan, covered in blood, both his own, and otherwise: WOOOOO! CHECKMATE, YOU DUMB MOTHERFUCKER!

Random wrath demon, on the floor: *shaky thumbs up*

—————

MC: This is called competetive eating, Beel.

Beelzebub: So I need to eat all of these humans eating those tacos before the timer runs out. I don’t know, MC, that sounds easy.

MC: Beel- no- you’re eating the tacos. It’s a competition to see who can eat more food, not people.

Beelzebub: Ohhhhh, that sounds much better! :3

————

MC: So instead of being such a dick-

Lucifer: You love it.

MC: Shut up. Anyway, instead of being such a dick, you can channel your pride into other things, like putting your brothers’ report cards up on the fridge!

Lucifer: MC, I would do that if they got anything worth being proud of.

MC: Maybe you can be proud of yourself for investing in a fucking tutor then, Ms Trunchbull.

————

MC: Belphie- Belphie wake up, we need to find something more sustainable to channel your sloth into.

Belphie: *snore*

MC: …you are a drain on my mental energy.

*MC is immediately swatted by Belphie’s tail*

————

MC: Hey Asmo, you know those incredibly detailed dirty roleplay stories you text me on a regular basis?

Asmo: How could I forget~?

MC: Yeah yeah yeah, so do you want to stop traumatizing me with those and go write a dark romance novel that’ll make some booktok girlie scream over?

Asmo: Oooooo… tempting~!

————

MC: Hey Levi, why don’t we envy something attainable so you have something to work towards? Like showering more!

Leviathan: What..? What’s this all about??

MC: I’m just trying to help you grow beyond constantly feeling envy to everyone around you, because you’re pretty great, Levi!

MC: And you can start showing the world you’re great by showering more!

Leviathan: MC, I don’t know…

MC: Watch, you can envy how much I don’t stink! Levi, please, you smell like moldy Monster Energy…

[devildomwriter]

Mephistopheles being confused by how easy to please an unwealthy MC is.

Like he cannot fathom how you’re THAT excited he bought you a drink, it’s only a drink not a pony or dragon?

You’re okay with a movie night at home and some popcorn??? Really? Even though you know he could fly you to Italy???

I think Mephistopheles would find it really refreshing and a nice change of pace to see that you really don’t need all the stuff he has just to find happiness. Of course he’d also love to spoil you beyond what you can fathom but I think an MC who doesn’t expect him to spend money and is content with little things too would be a real eye opener for him.

[obeymematches]

🫧🚿taking a shower together🫧🚿

nobody asked for this but let's go!!

Lucifer:

At first it was...awkward. This is a very intimate moment and frankly, he is not used to this. You already washed yourself almost entirely when he offers to wash your back. Also, he prefers very cold showers; he is used to not having warm water, living with Asmo and Levi. If you don't mind the cold water he'll suggest a thing or two... ;)

"Of course you may join me, my dove, need a hand getting in?"

Mammon:

He behaves as if he has done this before?? Very playful the entire time, teasing you with the showerhead. Gets the showergel and as a routine he washes your body. Isn't shy at all. Prefers very hot showers though so get ready for that. Will suggest sexy time at first.

"It's me MC, lemme join ya pleeeaseee!"

Leviathan:

Boy just wants it to be over at first, despite taking 40 min showers when he is alone. Very uncomfortable in this situation, just washes himself and gets out earlier than you. Not sure if this becomes a habit, but if you can get him to do it again he will like it more!

"Okay MC, I.. I think I'm ready!"

Satan:

Loves loves loves the idea and the moment!! Makes sure the water is perfect for you!!! "That's alright" won't do! Asks for permission to wash your body, hair, everywhere basically and his knees become weak when you offer to wash him. Now you must do this everyday, he has a new favourite part of the day!

"How did I not think of this before? Come on in!"

Asmo:

Well he is not a shower kind of guy but who is he to refuse this opportunity!! Poor bby doesn't even know how to switch from the tap to the showerhead. Very gentle when he offers to wash you! Compliments each part of your body! Feels like a therapy tbh. Likes his water warm but not too hot. Probably gets suggestive somewhere down the road.

"Ahhh MC I must join you! I really hope you don't mind!"

Beel:

Honestly he usually takes quick showers so this entire session lasts 10 minutes max, including drying. Offers to wash you but he uses the 2in1 very masculine gel so if you wanna smell more feminine you must stop him. Likes to hug you to make it even more intimate! Likes his water a bit cold but not too cold!

"Ohh, come on in quick! Of course I don't mind, are you kidding?"

Belphie:

Doesn't show it but he likes this moment so much! At least he has a reason to shower right? Very casual the entire time, doesn't ask but motions that he has the intetion to wash you. Looks very hot with wet hair! Doesn't really have a water preference but I feel like it's either too hot or too cold depending on the day.

"Ah now we're gonna have more time to cuddle! Let's do this MC!"

Solomon:

Adores this idea, though he also prefers kind of cold water. Acts very natural but inside he is melting. Pls wash his hair it'll make him want to kiss you. Doesn't become a habit but if you offer once in a while he is down to shower together. Though now he enjoys buying you different kind of showergels!

"I don't remember ever doing this before so uhh.. maybe if I stand here and you there-"

Simeon:

Ah he is very shy at first, might not think this is a good idea. If you can convince him though he'll be quick to warm up to this moment! Just washes himself though, it's not on his mind to do it for you. Likes moderate temperature water.

"Ah this is not so bad, honestly. Would you wash my back, please?"

Barbatos:

Does his best to enjoy every minute he gets to spend with you. The water is however you want it to be, he can make do with whetever. Has veey good quality gels and he uses a generous amount if you let him wash you. Anything for you MC <3

"Alright, come in. How do you like the water?"

Diavolo:

He overthinks the situation a lot. Has to make sure you have showergel options to choose from and whichever you pick he gets more of. The first time is awkward, doesn't really know what to do so it's up to you to show him the ropes. The second, third, etc time he becomes so casual and funny you can't help but look forward to these sessions.

"Come MC, there is plenty of place for both of us! I'll just move over here and-"

[sweetbrier2908]

sometimes you look at satan and think of lucifer. of course you keep it for yourself, you're wise enough to know that even when he's not mad at you but it definitely makes him uncomfortable. but sometimes, you mean it, only a few times in the span of many years you've known him, you look at him and his face, his expression, even his nose and his smile, his action, his attitude surprise you how similar he is to his father (can you say that? you always feel like this word is such a sensitive topic). you start noticing the similarity between those two and also the difference.

like how satan chuckles often than only smile when he reads and he's usually too excited to show you whatever intrigues him from the book.

like how satan's eyes are not that sharp, unlike lucifer's. satan's eyes are always smiling. if you remember correctly. he may say that is because he's a demon and he need to deceive others but maybe he's just a kind soul.

like how satan doesn't have wrinkles on the corner of his eyes and he doesn't frown that much. always keep his best composure. always acts polite. he can't afford to let people think he's rude since he need to surpass lucifer in everything.

like how satan's expression is always more gentle...more soft...and you look at him and you know that he was raised in love. in love. in love. the way he looks at little animal, the way he looks at his brothers while they're doing something silly. the way he focuses on the books, on the lessons,...the way he treats everything with such sincerity like they all have souls. you wonder if levi's the one who taught him how to take care for little animals, if mammon's the one who taught him you need to treat everyone equally, if asmo taught him to appreciate the beauty in even the smallest thing, if beel and belphie taught him to create a special bond with people is nice.

satan and lucifer, they shares some habits too. the first thing they do when they walk through the door is organize all the jackets and coats on the hanger, then they go to the kitchen and make something for themselves (but satan likes to make a cup of latte and lucifer likes hell coffee or tea which he was gifted by his beloved)- and for beel who's already there. they're gonna complain about something, then go to the library to take a look. arrage the misplaced books, sweep a little bit then take a sit and wait for their brothers to come home and complain again about the noise (everyone knows that they love being around their family and to proud to admit that they enjoy all the problem they cause). they don't do all of that together. never. satan takes after lucifer, you're kind of sure of it after spending years and years watching them, many things. you never tell him.

sometimes you look at satan and wonder how many things he takes after his brothers, his family. how many things he takes after love.

[devilevlls]

Lucifer’s lewd habits౨ৎ

Nobody asked for this one, but I can’t stop my mind from wondering about Lucifer’s kinks and preferences, so… I’m posting some of it.

(. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) Probably going to make part.2 if I remember more things.

Everything here is consensual. I’m talking about a scenario where both of you are aware of each other’s boundaries.

📌 TW: Shameless smut, explicit descriptions of lustful acts, intercourse. 

Tried to keep it gender-neutral.

๋࣭⭑Lucifer is the shameless type of guy, the one that will grip into your hair or neck while you are making out and slowly push you down, asking for a blowjob without words. He won’t stop pushing until you finally reach the goal.

He likes it slow, going deep, and will groan when you suddenly circle your tongue over his tip, tasting the saltiness of his pre-cum.

๋࣭⭑I think he is someone who doesn’t like PDA while others are looking, but while in public, without catching any attention, he will twist your nipples over your shirt just to see them hardening. He will chuckle and mock you, whispering into your ear on how easy you are.

๋࣭⭑He will make you beg for him to take you, I’m not saying just playfully, but almost making it annoying/painful. Lucifer is a sadist, so, for him, seeing you actually getting mad for wanting to have sex was pure entertainment.

๋࣭⭑Loves shower sex, Despite his busy schedule, whenever he finds a free moment, he'll send you messages inviting you to shower together.

๋࣭⭑Accidentally spread his wings when too excited or too close to an intense orgasm. He won’t be embarrassed tho, but it can startle you a little o_o

๋࣭⭑Will give you lustful stares when you are talking in public, and will smirk when noticing the growing blush on your cheeks.

๋࣭⭑Purposefully rubs himself against you while “helping” you reach for something and lets you feel his intimacy throbbing with excitement. (I headcanon that the house of lamentation has big furniture, since they are slightly taller than average humans)

๋࣭⭑Loves when you worship his body, his red eyes gleaming with amusement as he observes your lips showering him with kisses.

๋࣭⭑Probably will ask you to kneel down and brushes his shoes against your intimacy, enjoying every whimper, every gasp you let escape from your lips.

๋࣭⭑While being the top, Lucifer will grab your hips with force and slam himself into you repeatedly, just to painfully slow down, making him slide in and out. Will chuckle seeing your needy reactions.

๋࣭⭑If he is the bottom, he will make sure to edge you, circling his hips on your lap slowly, making it go deep and then stop, feeling how your body tense with the feeling of almost reaching the peak and calming down again, never reaching the goal.

Plus for MC's habits with him౨ৎ

๋࣭⭑MC boldly grasps his horns as they engage in heated make out sections, unapologetically reveling in the sensation of pushing him to his limits. They adore the subtle frown that crosses his face as he submits to their dominance, though it's clear he thoroughly enjoys it.

๋࣭⭑Casually grabbing Lucifer’s ass as he walks by or while he is trying to give a serious speech. They would take care not to embarrass him in front of anyone tho, just silly moments where they know this would be possible, and they will only receive a threatening glare from the avatar of pride.

๋࣭⭑Nibbling on his ears. For me, Lucifer is a touch starved old man that gets shivers from almost anything, so nibbling on his ears would make him yelp softly, and he will blush if someone is around and hears it.

๋࣭⭑Will steal pecks from him while he is trying to scold them, making his cold heart melt little by little and as they notice him getting excited, they will rub him over his clothes, making the demon whimper softly.

IDK if there are grammar errors, wasn't really trying hard for this one, just wanted to share my thoughts.

Masterlistɞ 📌

[here-kittykitty]

MORE! PEOPLE! NEED! TO! MAKE! THE! OBM! BOYS! FUCKED UP!!!!

and i dont just mean mentally (although that is appreciated <33)

Mammon turns around to lovestare at you during class💕but his neck is at an extremely offputting angle and when you catch him staring he gets flustered and whips around away from you and you can swear you can hear bones snap

Asmo is braiding your hair and it's soft and gentle, you're almost falling asleep, so you barely register him murmuring about how beautiful you are, how stunning you look in red, how badly he'd like to paint you in it, how sure he is that your insides are as pretty as your outsides, how much he'd like to taste...

You're in the observatory with Belphie, talking in hushed giggles under the stars and the blood red moon. His hands are warm in yours and his eyes are kind, you trust him and want nothing more than to fall asleep here in a nest of pillows, but his shadow looks like its warning you to stay awake

You're venting to Satan, just something petty that your classmate did to spite you, but you're pacing around his room while he watches, and your pulse is racing and you're having to blink the red out of your eyes and you feel suddenly murderous, until you make eye contact with Satan and his eyes are glowing and you realize he's amplifying and feeding off your rage because old habits die hard

Let them be fucked up.

[hopeluna-archived]

Thinking about......Solomon who randomly gives your cheek a small lick just to see that disgusted expression of yours as you look at him while frantically wiping your cheek with your hand, and then wiping your hand on his sleeve with mumbles of "ew ew ew ew ew".

All while he has a shit-eating grin on his face, watching you question your entire relationship with him.

[mammonscheeks]

diavolo on a ghost tour

Imagine taking Diavolo to a human world destination that's considered "haunted," like one of those American cities that capitalize off cheesy ghost tours, like Salem or Savannah.

Imagine Diavolo earnestly listening to every word that escapes the unenthusiastic tour guide's mouth.

"Diavolo, you know these stories are fake, right? It's just a tourist trap," MC giggles.

"Are you sure, MC? This place seems pretty haunted to me! Human culture is so interesting, you all are fascinated with frightening yourselves intentionally!"

MC then realizes that if demons exist, it wouldn't be crazy for ghosts to exist either. So they cling onto Diavolo's warm arm for comfort for the rest of the night as he laughs away at the gruesome stories of murder and hauntings. Diavolo thinks it's adorable that MC seeks out his comfort, even though it's not necessary. After all, no paranormal entity would dare try hurting the Demon King's partner.

Diavolo then decides to gaslight the other tourists at the end of the tour by switching in and out of his demon form quickly. As his wings and horns flash for a mere millisecond, the humans run off screaming, causing the two of you to break out into laughter.

"Young Master... I cannot say that messing around with humans is recommended." Barbatos chimes in.

Plot twist: the ghost tours are real, and Diavolo can see every single one. He actually waved and chatted with a few ghosts.

[authormars]

You don't understand!!

Levi should be a little chubby!! You know he doesn't work out outside of beat saber!!

Belphie should be either super skinny or chubby!! He doesn't do anything!!

Diavolo is an absolute hunk of a man, as is Beel!!

Lucifer should be sickly and pale bc he does NOT take care of himself!!

Satan shouldn't have a bunch of muscles!! He can be average fitness!!

Asmo should be a twink, fucking look at him!!

We need more diversity in them damn body types -_-

[dxncingwithastrxnger]

Lucifer falling in love with an MC who gives all of his bullshit right back to him tenfold. Lucifer is an arrogant, prideful, rude son of a bitch before you really know him and MC will give that right back to him every single time they speak. MC does not feel like putting up with his actions and they will make that very clear until the day Luci starts being a little more honest and a little less i'm-better-than-you-human.

But Luci likes that about them, he finds it intriguing. This random human just shows up out of nowhere and starts sticking their nose up at him and scoffing whenever he demands anything of him and thinks they'll just get away with it? They do but that's besides the point, he still threatens death every time and they just shrug it off as if Lucifer is nothing more than a tiny, little kitten.

Honestly, who does this human think they are? The other brothers always end up astonished whenever they witness a clash between the two, especially because quite often, one of these clashes involves MC defending one of them or scolding Lucifer for their sake.

"What do ya think you're doin', MC!? You're gonna get us killed!!"

"Lucifer's soo mad at you, lool."

"*Scoff* As if I need you to defend my actions to him."

"Oooh, MC, my sweet, little hero! Look at you standing up to big, mean Lucifer! I'm filled with butterflies at the sight! ♡"

"MC, you didn't need to do that, now he'll get even more upset..."

"Woah, didn't know you had it in you. Guess Beel wasn't lying, you really are a pretty crazy human."

Though, of course, MC can be quite sweet to Lucifer when they really wanna be. Most of those times, there's something they want from him, though, mind you. Or, some days that's how dear Luci can tell that something's wrong. A cooperative, listening MC who follows him around and insists on keeping him company is something he quickly learns is a sign that his human needs not their usual banter and dynamic, but kind, gentle words and affection. And on those days, Lucifer never hesitates to let his guard down wherever they're at. Whether they're at RAD, out in public, or just at the HOL, whether there's people around or not, he'll put his pride away just for now and concern himself with nothing but taking care of the one he loves in whatever way they need, that is what will always matter most. He'll take a defiant, snarky human over a watered down, upset one any day.

[zephyrchama]

Can't stop thinking about the brothers calling MC "master" since that new teaser trailer came out. The game is called "One Master to Rule Them All." It's always been called that. This massive potential has been right in front of our eyes the whole time.

Lucifer, who only uses it in private when he's feeling particularly devilish. He wraps his arms around you, looks you right in the eye, and asks, "how does my master feel today, hmm?"

Mammon, who has an empty wallet and the urge to gamble: "Maaaster! Can I borrow some cash? I can, right? I'm your first, after all. I'll just take it from your wallet."

Leviathan, who wants to go to an anime collab cafe but is too anxious to go alone, so he begs you: "Please! Master! It's only open this week and I just have to collect all 24 limited edition cafe coasters! It'll be easier if we go together!"

Satan, who catches you when you stumble and jokingly asks, "are you okay, master?" He likes seeing the little sparks of wrath in your eyes that mirror his own.

Asmodeus, who thinks the word is hot and enjoys your reaction when he comes to steal you away from other people by saying "hey! I need to speak with my master. I'll be borrowing them for a while. I'm sure you don't mind."

Beelzebub, who hungrily stares at the food in the fridge with your name on it. He knows he needs to butter you up to have any chance of success: "Hey master, are you gonna eat that?"

Belphegor, who uses it at the most unexpected times. He texts the group chat, "does anyone know where our master is? I can't find them." It sets off a long chain of messages. "Master's not in their bedroom?" "Master? Haven't seen 'em." "Did you try yelling 'master!' and seeing if they respond?" "I saw master getting something to drink about an hour ago." "Master, are you reading our messages? I know you are." "I can't believe master is ignoring us." Several crying emoji are sent in quick succession.

Solomon and Barbatos, who witness the brothers doing this on occasion. Solomon turns to the latter and says, "You never call me your master. Want to give it a try?"

Barbatos looks at him with barely repressed revulsion. "I only have one master, and that is the Young Master. If you ever make such a joke again I will have you tried in court for lese-majeste."

[absolutepokemontrash]

MC two seconds after walking through the doors of the HOL after leaving the house to get groceries for approximately 30 minutes

[devildomwriter]

Wingwoman

Lilith being the reason MC was chosen for the exchange program is hilarious to me because she accidentally sent this oblivious human meant to heal her family to literal hell. And instead of just healing the family, MC fucks them too.

And her spirit is stuck in the Devildom so now she has to listen to her descendant and her “brothers” go at it and this was not the result she had in mind.

[married-to-google-translater]

Can I get headcanons for Lucifer reacting to the reader getting really mad at him and instead of talking about her feelings, she teaches Diavolo slang to get back at him. I just want headcanons of Lucifer suffering as Diavolo says "pog".

Lucifer

You and Lucifer were arguing about something really stupid.

About something that didn't even matter.

But you were stressed about studying.

And Lucifer was stressed about the paperwork.

So now you're taking stress out on each other.

And you were indeed losing the argument.

Because Lucifer is Lucifer…

And arguing with him is not a good idea.

Unless you have a death wish.

So you decided to go and lick your wounds.

When you were on your way to your room, you ran into Diavolo by chance.

And you stayed to chat with him for a while.

It calmed you down.

Diavolo had the ability to make you smile.

Diavolo wanted to make you feel better.

So he asked you to teach him human slang.

And why refuse ;)

Diavolo would be a quick learner indeed.

Lucifer wouldn't understand what he said the next time they had to talk.

He should ask Satan for help.

Because you sit in the middle of a circle of salt and refuse to talk to him XD