#OR EVEN ITP for that matter

[chloesimaginationthings]

You drew him as such a baby here... so cute!

Oswald is just a lil guy.. Pit Bonnie get sent to super hell for bullying him

[callmearcturus]

ITP my job finds a new even more horrific way to lowkey torture employees (and that's not an exaggerated usage of "torture" funnily enough)

"hey arc what's up, you been quiet"

funny story

so the casually cruel fuckheads at my job sent IT around to every desk to do something with the phones.

they set every ringer to maximum volume and disabled the ability to lower the volume or mute the ringer. so every desk phone, regardless of department, is connected to the main queue and whether you are meant to be answering calls or not, your phone rings at 90 to 100 dB.

I have very well-controlled anxiety. i've been to therapy, I take medication, I know recovery techniques. I've been living with this my entire life. but: my primary anxiety trigger is sudden loud sounds, to the point that I always make sure to take my lunch when they are testing the fire alarms and I once turned down a nice secretarial gig bc it was for a construction company.

so for the past few days, I've been subjected to constant, inconsistent loud noises.

I've already burst into tears twice and had to take 4 emergency breaks in the stairwell to get control of my breathing to avert a panic attack.

I talked to my boss (my direct boss, who is a wonderful man who has my eternal loyalty, not the vicious thoughtless fuckhead who runs the company) and he literally directed me to "put your earbuds in and turn on the sound canceling. if anyone notices, I'll cover for you." like, it's that fucking bad.

(and i'm not alone! there's a guy in another department who is a former army guy or former cop, and he's shaken bc it's just loud sudden noises surrounding him, it's horrible.)

so, i flat out took today off bc I needed a mental health day and to talk to my doctor. my doctor, who I think might literally want to fistfight the CEO of my company at this point bc this is cruelty for no fucking reason, is writing me a strongly worded accomodation request and getting me some extra drugs to help me not freak out

but its a fucking nightmare and it's affecting everything. i got all the classic warning signs of depression: i don't want to do my normal hobbies, i don't want to talk to friends (i'm forcing myself to do it, I'm old hat at this), I don't want to eat, and i want to lay down int he dark a lot.

SO. IT'S BAD. But we're working on it.

My boss and I have a pact, that I'm sticking around until he throws in the towel and leaves, but I had to tell him "this needs to stop or I need to look for another job, no matter how much I love this stupid goddamn job, i can't physically do this"

so that's what's up.

[maraariana01]

oop! another character joins the ITP AU! silly guy alert!!

im actually putting this under a read more bc it's pretty long

• as described in the book, Ralpho is 6'5, not counting the ears

• he is literally a sentient mascot costume. and yet no one actually knew or realized that (until now). he took his job very seriously, meaning that whenever he was being worn, he was quiet and didn't move, like a normal suit.

• during the events of the story Bunny Call, since the counselor overslept instead of doing what he was supposed to do, Ralpho decided to take matters into his own paws and perform the Bunny Call all by himself.

• how is he sentient? where did he come from? no one really knows. not even he. it's a mystery. (although i do have my own theory but that's a story for another day)

• outside of his job, though, he is very talkative! he will ramble on and on about anything really. some might find him a bit annoying

• he is kind of a trickster! he does enjoy a good prank!

• now onto the question of How did he even get here and how did he meet Spring Bonnie? well, Camp Etenia eventually closed down for unknown reasons, leaving him basically jobless. he is BORED OUT OF HIS MIND. he has nothing to do now!! so he wanders off in search of a new purpose. or just something to do. anything. and he runs into Spring Bonnie! (maybe while he was out to get some groceries?) rejoice!! a fellow rabbit!! so he starts talking ten to the dozen about his misadventures

• Springs is obviously caught off guard by this sudden encounter, but the rabbit seemed nice (and quite charming!) so he didn't mind. they hang out more and more and eventually oops! they catch feelings,,

that's it i think, enjoy the silly guy <3

[cyber-streak-extra]

So, I decided to make another quick little fic involving the ITP: Happy Ending AU by @maraariana01 and this time, it’s got Funtime Freddy from Count The Ways, aswell :)

Title: A Bear, A Child, & Said Bear’s Way Of Breaking, Entering, & Capturing

The animatronic bear stared out at the house, a smirk plastered right on his face. He’d been around the area for quite some time—after simply stumbling across it after wandering around after leaving the old man’s garage.

He already knew who he wanted to get this time—the young boy, Oswald. He’d already been planning everything... he’d just been waiting for the perfect moment.

Funtime Freddy sighed. When it did come down to taking the kid, he would’ve preferred to be able to use his storage tank—but, thanks to Silly Millie, when she entered, she caused it to get stuck.

It was something that the bear only discovered after he’d counted, gotten rid of his boredom, and fulfilled Chilly Milly’s wish. It was all still a win-win in his eyes. But he wished she hadn’t gotten it stuck. No matter what he tried, it stayed that way.

Oh well, Funtime Freddy thought. I can still manage.

...

Oswald sat at his bed, drawing some sketches. His phone was in his lap, texting Ben—although his friend hadn’t texted back yet. He could hear Jinx purring from where she lay on the ground.

He was waiting for Spring Bonnie to finish up with some chores—as the rabbit was going to drive him to go pick up Ben. Through his closed door, he could hear the vacuum.

Oswald was glad that everything was normal again—...well, as normal as life could be after he went through the ball pit, and obtained a third parent in Spring Bonnie.

Everything else was still pretty normal. School had started back up, he’d been visiting and chatting with Ben more—who had returned from his little vacation not too long ago. Spring Bonnie, Jackie, and Thomas all seemed to be comfortable with each other.

He knew it was something that took time getting adjusted to. Oswald was happy that it went smoother than he had thought it would when he talked to the two of them, explaining little parts of what had happened that day.

...Even now, he had never outright explained the ball pit. Sure, he told them both that he found Spring Bonnie at Jeff’s Pizza, but Oswald never explained the time traveling part. He didn’t even know how.

Click.

Oswald paused. What was that? He frowned. It sounded like it was coming from behind him. His window? Before he could turn, he started to hear the sound of hissing.

“Jinxie?” He glanced down at the cat, who was backing up slowly—she looked on edge, and her hissing didn’t stop. “What’s the m-“

Oswald’s eyes widened when he was suddenly grabbed by a cold, metallic, and somewhat broken arm. A gasp had escaped him when he was lifted up, but he could tell it was muffled.

His eyes darted around, trying to get a full look, and what had grabbed him was obviously an animatronic—but not the one that he was used to seeing, or liked seeing. Just like the arm, this animatronic was damaged, and he seemed to be a bear.

The animatronic bear chuckled, although it was obvious that he was trying to keep himself quiet. He was just barely succeeding. “Hello, Little Ocelot!~” He whispered—or tried to, voice glitching.

Barely managing to see anything else behind the large bear, Oswald noticed his window. It was fully opened, but it looks like some parts of it had been broken in the process.

Oswald wanted to get away. He wanted away from this bear. He could feel himself moving around... but it wasn’t working. The bear’s grip was strong. What did he want?

Oswald didn’t want to find out.

Could he yell for Spring Bonnie? He knew he sounded muffled... but what if the bunny still heard him? How good was the bunny’s hearing? He didn’t know.

For a moment, Oswald thought about trying to call someone—but that was quickly thrown out the window when he realized that he couldn’t. His phone, originally in his lap before he was grabbed, was now abandoned on the floor.

He could only think that, if he could grab it, that he would either end up messaging Ben—who seemed to have texted back now—or his parents—who were out on a date. What would they do?

“Squirmy one, aren’t ya, Little Ocelot?” The bear chuckled again, still seemingly trying to make sure that he remained quiet enough. Oswald glanced around, eyes spotting the bear’s stomach. What was leaking out of it...?

...

Spring Bonnie had been vacuuming the whole house. He’d decided to do some chores a couple of hours, and then he planned on driving with his son and Ben. He’d promised to do so after he was finished.

He was in the living room—which was the last area he needed to get done. Earlier, Oswald’s room had been where he had started, and he went from there.

Spring Bonnie’s ears twitched, and he paused. He thought he heard something. Was it just the vacuum? It was loud. He’d almost forgotten that he had the TV on, too—a rom-com, which he was glancing up at and watching bits of as he did chores.

He continued vacuuming for a second or two... but then the bunny’s ears twitched again. The bunny was hearing something. It wasn’t coming from the vacuum or the TV, though. It was... what was it?

The bunny pressed a button, turning the vacuum off, and setting it carefully on the ground. The TV’s volume was quite low, so he didn’t need to turn it further down—he’d mainly been relying on the subtitles earlier.

Hissing. The bunny heard hissing. And... talking? Talking. It was a little distant and somewhat muffled from where he was, but he knew that’s what it had to be.

The hissing had to be Jinx—he’d grown accustomed to that noise. But the talking? It wasn’t Oswald. It wasn’t Jackie, or Thomas. It wasn’t Ben. He could tell that. He knew all of their voices well... but this wasn’t any of them.

Son? Spring Bonnie frowned in concern. He could feel his ears start to lower. He should go check on him. He hoped that it was nothing—he hoped that nothing was wrong—nothing was going on with his son.

Moving the vacuum out of his path, the bunny started walking down the hallway to reach his son’s room.

...

When he opened the door, Spring Bonnie nearly stepped on Jinx’s tail—but spotted the hissing cat before that, and stepped out of the way. Once out of her way, the cat ran out.

He watched her leave, confused, before turning back around and looked ahead. That confusion quickly turned to horror from the sight in front of him.

Funtime Freddy, beside the bed, with his son squirming around in the bear’s grasp. Both’s attention were turned to Spring Bonnie when he had entered the room.

Spring Bonnie! Oswald felt relieved.

“Oh, why hello!” Funtime Freddy knew of him. Knew of how the bunny came from the pit—pretended to be Thomas—before truly joining the family. He knew how he was essentially a third parent.

Oswald thought he heard a... growl?

Spring Bonnie took a step forward, and Funtime Freddy started moving, too—towards the direction of Oswald’s door. “I wouldn’t get too close, bun-bun!” He snickered.

The bunny stared. “I have plans,” He started, still slowly making his way to Oswald’s door—the smirk remaining on his face. “You wouldn’t want your Little Ocelot to go...” He used his arm without the hand, seemingly doing a ‘slicing’ motion around his own neck.

“But, maybe it would be fun to make you count the ways with me, bun-bun...” He laughed, smirk growing. He wondered what Spring Bonnie would choose. He also wondered what the kid would want. But, he had different plans.

He was here to get the kid and leave, before resuming everything. Silly Milly shouldn’t have gotten his storage tank stuck. If not for her, this would be a little easier. But, he had fun with her.

Oswald noticed how Spring Bonnie was beginning to leak. There was always little bits dripping, but massive leaking usually seemed to happen, he noticed, when the bunny was angry or sad.

Teeth. Oswald and Funtime Freddy saw all of the teeth stored in the bunny after he unhinged his jaw. Angry. Oswald hadn’t seen him like that since the night he went back to Jeff’s Pizza to get his dad.

“Oh, you don’t like that, bun-bun?” Funtime Freddy giggled.

Spring Bonnie’s hands bawled into fists. Just as the bunny started to get closer, the bear ran out of Oswald’s bedroom door. Spring Bonnie followed.

He entered the living room, looking around—he didn’t see Funtime Freddy or his son yet. He could feel himself leaking further.

Just as the bunny took another step, he heard a glitchy little laughter, followed by footsteps, and the feeling of something hitting him from behind—it felt... electrifying. Shocking.

...

Spring Bonnie blinked. He was leaning against one of the walls in the living room. He wiped at some of the liquid agony and remnant, before hurriedly looking around. Son...! What had the bear done?

Standing up fully, the bunny hurriedly began looking all over the house. He went back to his son’s room, checking under the bed, and in the closet, before moving to the rest of the house.

Oswald... Spring Bonnie could feel himself shaking as he kept checking the house. His ears were lowered. He could feel so much liquid leaking from his body—eyes especially.

As he reached the last room that he had to check, Thomas and Jackie’s room, Spring Bonnie leaned against the wall as his body started shaking further. How could he let this happen? How could he let his son get taken?

What was going to happen...?

Son... I’m so sorry...

He couldn’t find anything in the house—no hints or traces of where Funtime Freddy could possibly be with his son. Wherever the bear went with Oswald, neither of them were in the house anymore.

Spring Bonnie made a decision. He left through the front door, hurriedly looking around outside—he spent an hour or two doing so. That’s what it felt like.

The bunny was leaking everywhere. He checked the front yard, and the back yard—every area near the house, and even somewhat far away—in hopes that he’d find any sort of clue to where his son and the bear could be.

He found nothing.

Spring Bonnie made his way back home. When he got back, he’d been planning to recheck everywhere. But, as he passed the front door, the bunny fell to his knees.

Jinx meowed sadly from where she lay somewhere in the living room.

He should’ve been able to stop Funtime Freddy. He should’ve been able to stop him from taking his son. The bunny should’ve been able to save his son. Had he failed his son...? What did Funtime Freddy want with him?

Horrible possibilities started throwing themselves into the bunny’s mind—which he attempted to ignore, but... Funtime Freddy could do anything. What if he had already done something? How was he going to find his son?

Spring Bonnie heard the front door open.

...

“Oswald, we’re-“ Thomas started, closing the door behind him and his wife—although he stopped when he spotted Spring Bonnie in the middle of the living room.

He was collapsed on his knees, shaking. Even if the bunny wasn’t facing them, Jackie could tell that he was leaking... something. (What was it called? She’d never asked. Did Spring Bonnie know?)

Most of the leaking, she noticed, was coming from his eyes—it was pouring out like a waterfall. Although she noticed it coming from other parts of him, too. Jackie frowned.

“Spring Bonnie?” She gently called out, approaching the bunny carefully. Thomas stayed where he was, but looked around.

“Spring Bonnie,” The nurse knelt beside the animatronic. “What happened...? What’s wrong?”

The leaking bunny turned slightly to look at Jackie. Messily searching through his pockets of his coat, Spring Bonnie eventually pulled out his note pad and pen.

Jackie and Thomas, who moved a little closer, both watched as the bunny started writing. Although, whatever was leaking ended up hitting the notepad paper. So, the only words that the two could fully read were: “Oswald” “Freddy” and “Captured”.

Spring Bonnie messily flipped to another page on the notepad a second later, and sloppily wrote something else—this time, only two words. But it got the point across. “Son taken.”

“W-What...?” Jackie whispered, horrified, her eyes widening.

He could vaguely hear Thomas say something, too, followed by quick footsteps—from the corner of his eyes, Thomas seemed to be making his way to his son’s room.

Jackie watched her husband for a single moment, before refocusing on the shaking bunny in front of her. “Spring Bonnie, w-“

She was cut off when the bunny moved forward, hugging her—the hug was tight, but he wasn’t hurting Jackie, either. Blinking as her eyes felt watery, Jackie hugged the bunny back.

Jackie had never seen him like this. She rubbed the bunny’s back, closing her eyes. Oswald... please, be okay. What had happened? Why would anyone want to take her son...?

He should’ve stopped the bear before he escaped, Spring Bonnie had thought. He should’ve done... anything. Why did this have to happen? Oswald didn’t deserve anything that the bear may do.

He only hoped that he could get to his son somehow before Funtime Freddy went through with anything...

[lyraoctaviawrites]

✨Plans for the Into the Phantasm series✨

I am posting this because I don’t think I’ve explained it in much detail

The main ITP series is going to have five books, all of which vary in length and tone. If you just want to experience everything the main story has to offer, you’ll only need to read those five. However, I will also be releasing side stories. There will be three (probably), each with only ten chapters. One takes place during the events of book 3 and will likely be written and released alongside, one is a backstory to explain the origins of the Phantasm and the final one will be a sequel to the main series which takes place several years later. There’s also going to be shorter side stories which I honestly might just release on Tumblr. There’s even gonna be a Halloween special out soon, so keep an eye out for that :3

Into the Phantasm in its entirety is going to be released first on Wattpad for completely free. I’m not the biggest fan of Wattpad, but it’s the easiest thing for me to use to write and release my work, at least until it can be released in physical copies. That is the eventual plan. Basically, they’ll stay on Wattpad for free until I can sell them so I can garner interest and so that they’re still out there in the world. Be warned, once they’re released physically, they will be removed from Wattpad. As much as I’d love to just give all of my art away for free, the world sucks and I need money to not die so… yeah, sorry.

This series is now three years in the making and I have fallen so in love with its story and characters. Into the Phantasm is the definition of a passion project. Is it rough around the edges? Probably. Have I made mistakes? Too many to count. Are there gonna be people that hate Into the Phantasm and consider it to be worth less than a coffee stain on a fancy carpet? Absolutely! But none of that matters because it’s everything to me. And if just one single person reads it and feels the same way I do, if they feel inspired by my art, I’ll consider it all worth it.

Stay amazing, gamers 💜💜💜

[synthetic-sonata]

i just consumed so much sparklecare content and made an au of my oc pink . say hi to razzle (b) dazzle(d)! he is now everyone elses problem.

more info under da cut

he's very similar to uni in some ways, and that isn't intentional i've had pink for a WHILE. they would b good friends tho. i gave him mega-sads instead of ultra mega-sads ( normalest sentence ) just to differentiate. Bc i do not want ppl to call him a clone of uni they are very much diff people just with the same sort of outward flavor.

speaking of which he probably has more afflictions i just didnt know how to sparklecare-ify having ADHD and probable BPD. nor did i rlly want to make terms for it. likely has a physical affliction as well before coming to the hospital i just didn't know what to give him

he has two prosthetics! one prosthetic arm, one leg. yes, this obviously means those two limbs were removed from him somehow. most people assume and theorize the staff at sparklecare did this during a surgery, but... pink gets very dodgy about this topic and never answers it in a clear way.

due to him being very sociable and easy to get along with he's friends with most patients . sort of like a Hospital Celebrity. he's known and he's cool and he's chill so ppl like him.

also i'm not sure if it matters but the bro and scatterbrained art is pulled from the official website, which is prob obvious

his favorite holidays are palentines day and kissmas and its obvious. loves anything associated with love and that whole aesthetic.

either has the default rainbow armband or the ITP band ( he's usually pretty compliant .. mostly out of fear. he does and will join or help escape attempts sometimes tho )

sleeps a lot. possibly narcolepsy possibly just not that ( like. napping a lot or depression naps or naps bc hes dissociating and or understimulated. )

more traits that fit him that i couldn't fit in da sheet:

creative

he's often found doodling idly or singing and making music in his spare time. he's expressed a desire to become an idol or an actor in his future. ( referencing how canon pink/razz is an idol robot lol )

sleazy/flirtatious

honestly this one is a give or take but it's a trait he eventually has. he definitely flirts with people often and casually. whether or not he actually sleeps around is a give or take though because i can see it either way, but, probably. he has an Allure to him. and he's. hypersexual so i mean yea.

egotistical/self-absorbed

this one isn't super bad, but he hypes himself up a lot and compliments himself casually. it's mostly to make him feel better about himself... but he does sometimes put other people down in order to put him up. it's always jokingly, at least... mostly, but it can become a problem later down the line. it doesn't feel good to be called lesser to someone!

tech-savvy

he's probably edited videos and audio a lot. and is or wanted to be a streamer/youtuber.

outgoing/extroverted

outgoing and affectionate are sort of hand in hand for pink. although, he has a very high social battery.... somehow, and is always around people or talking to him. he's also pretty impulsive.

affectionate

sometimes overly so. he'll even be affectionate or call people nicknames who he really should be at odds with - this includes staff. he's incredibly chill with most of the staff, or at least seems to be... giving them all nicknames and talking with them as if they were casual friends ( they aren't ). or it's to annoy them. it's not really clear with razz, ever.

presumably, this is a bad way of coping with how shitty people treat him by acting as if they're his friends - or something.

sensitive ( if you told razzy you hated him or smth he'd take it super personally but he'd come off as not offended but he'd think about it way too much. surprisingly he doesn't do this with like threats. he's numb to threats almost entirely )

conflict avoidant ( mostly explained in chill but they prob should be separate things there just wasnt enough space lol )

soda/sweets junkie

juvenile

he casually swears a lot and says a lot of sex jokes or things like that. Very casually, once again.

dissociative

his response to anything traumatic is usually just being really zoned out and dissociative after - due to this people think he doesn't really have a proper response to trauma. he does! people just don't think the zoning out counts as one! he has others, but he tries to hide any other trauma response for when he's alone.

fear of hospitals/medical stuff/etc

surprisingly, this didn't happen after being admitted to sparklecare, but it very much didn't help. goes hand in hand with claustrophobia and a lot of other fears he won't admit to. he's gotten numb over time. it still messes with him badly, but that mostly shows in the form of him dissociating... or in rare cases, having a panic attack. he only really shows emotion when he's in very very bad mental health or alone. at the very least he has people to talk to - if he didn't, he'd likely have completely broken by now.

thats a lot of things and i could probably find more to describe him but yea. He should prob also be more saturated n simplified but ehhhhhh. My oc my funny my silly he gets to slightly bend rules cuz he isnt in the comic its fiiine.

( plus its kinda symbolic of how many people in universe would see pink as surprisingly mentally well-adjusted and fine considering the situation he's in, which reflects in him not being 100% saturated. but he is. it just doesn't show outwardly )

[seventhdoctor]

Reincarnation and Promises

ITP a lot of thoughts related to Soulshipping as I work on this fic, as yelled to my tabletop group who basically know nothing but what I’ve told them about GX but a lot about my love for reincarnation junk.

Just how does Judai relate to his past life? How does that affect his relationship with Yubel?

In their original lives Judai promised Yubel he'd only love them, after Yubel had already voluntarily become a monster dedicated to protecting him. In the present Judai remembers their past lives while Yubel is trying to destroy the universe, tortured into insanity by a combination of his mistake and the Light of Destruction’s corruption, and he instantly flips from "you're evil and deluded and I will stop you at any cost" to "I accept your love (by choosing Super Fusion), you need healing and I will risk my entire existence to help you."

What is he thinking at that moment when he flips? The decision to fuse with Yubel is about taking responsibility, growing up, and redemption as well as - or even more than - a matter of love. But also, there's so many angles to what he’s feeling about those two things, and how much of each factors into exactly why he chooses to metaphorically return Yubel’s love and fuse their souls.

The flashback to their past lives is brief, less than three minutes of episode most of which is exposition, and you don't really get a full sense of just how much Judai connects with his past life beyond the line "I remember... They're me and Yubel in our past lives" before he watches his past self make that defining promise.

How much does he remember? Does he feel like a continuation of his past life in that moment, or like the next version of the young prince? I feel the answer to that question changes the meaning of his decision to fuse their souls together, in essence ensuring they can't be separated again as a gesture of love and/or to take responsibility for how they’ve hurt Yubel. If he feels a sense of continuity with his past self then that decision is a continuation of that promise to love Yubel, and an as-it-should-be reunion between guardian and guarded. If he views his past self as someone connected to but separate from himself, then continuing that promise is more of a decision he takes upon himself to stay connected to someone he still feels tied to - or maybe not. Maybe it’s simply a sense of duty to someone he’s hurt, someone he promised to love in another life and feels obligated to love in the present.

How much responsibility does he feel to uphold the vows of his past self? How much responsibility does he feel to heal someone who's been hurt badly because of his mistakes (which were made because Yubel was attacking his neighbors to begin with)? Is loving Yubel his obligation, his nature, or his choice? Can it be multiple of these things, or even all three?

And on the other end Yubel made their choice long ago, without all those questions about their relation to a past life because their past is their present in ways Judai's is not. If Judai really wanted, he could probably reject everything about his past life and destroy Yubel to save the world. That's the least likely choice (and again, one he implicitly rejects when he chooses Super Fusion immediately after remembering), but he could probably do it. Yubel doesn't have that choice to reject the past or they barely have it, because they were remade entirely for him and both their existence and sense of self still kinda revolve around him.

The exact feelings Judai has about Yubel and the fusion are a matter of interpretation and/or headcanon, and trying to figure out what I think for fic purposes has brought up a lot of fascinating questions about how their past bears upon the present and the unevenness of Judai’s reincarnation combined with Yubel’s more constant nature. It’s definitely making some scenes both really fun, and also hard to finish before I settle my own thoughts here.

[odinsravendutchess]

2nd Bariatric Surgeon Fired…

So I had to have a special swallow study done for my bariatric surgeon. It was no walk in the park.

I live 2 hours from the hospital it was going to be done at. So I made the appointment and was told to be at the hospital for an 8am appointment. I was supposed to be mailed paperwork but they didn’t do that.

I drive 2 hours 1 way to be told my appointment was at 11:30 so I had to wait. Not happy, but fine! I was going to at least get my info so I could look at my chart. So I got all the info to do that.

I look in my chart to find the labs I did 2 months ago were low. It was my iron. I have a medical history of a rare bleeding disorder that pairs with anemia. It’s called immune thrombocytopenia purpura aka ITP.

I had a hysterectomy and I’m 37. There is not explainable reason as to why I have low iron other than something is going on that we don’t know about causing this.

I had my swallow study done. Everything was normal.

The bariatric surgeon didn’t think it was a big deal and the surgeon’s nurse lied about what she communicated to me in my chart.

Every call or email is saying I had a call or email with the surgeon. I didn’t talk or email the surgeon. I called or talked to a receptionist or nurse. I have only talked to the surgeon once. The hospital did that to bill my insurance more.

So I told the “bariatric coordinator “ what happened. She disregarded me entirely and was acting like I was the problem so I hung up on her and emailed the bariatric nurse to tell her I was firing them.

Then I filed a grievance with the medical facility explaining everything that happened. They called me back and they want me to report it to the hospital campus, which I am going to do here in a moment.

The bariatric nurse emailed me back and tried to say she didn’t falsify anything even though she did. She also tried to say she didn’t call but emailed it to me, which I didn’t ever get an email over my iron levels.

And now I am upset with the bariatric surgeon because she wasn’t taking my health issues seriously.

If my iron gets any lower I will be in serious trouble, we’re talking being admitted, (I don’t get to be in med/surge, I am a direct admit to ICU), and transfusions. I currently can’t have surgery at all because I have a high risk of complications just from my low iron levels alone.

I got my “Dream Team” of doctors on it though. I have my PCP (internal medicine), Endocrinologist, Gastroenterologist, and my Immunologist looking into it.

My Immunologist will figure it out in like 2 minutes. He is crazy super smart and has worked at a transplant hospital before starting his own practice. My labs indicate low iron due to chronic illness (from my research) meaning my iron needs to be monitored closely for the rest of my life. I see all my “Dream Team” doctors in the next 2 weeks.

Why am I posting this;

CALL OUT THOSE WHO WRONG YOU, ESPECIALLY THOSE WHO HAVE YOUR LIFE IN THEIR HANDS.

As health care professionals, we are human. We are not gods. We are not above you. Every life is worth caring for and supporting. Every life matters. Patients are not pay checks and to treat them as such is beyond despicable and unforgivable.

I am a very aggressive health care professional because I treat my patients like family so if someone tries to give my patients or their families (I’m specialized in pediatric high acuity more specialized in rare illnesses) a hard time, I will have it out with them.

As a patient I am very aggressive to get on top of things and to be compliant because at the end of the day, how can my patients and their families trust me if I don’t practice what I preach?

[anthonypaulh]

GETTING my TEETH into ITP and DENTAL TREATMENT

Before my purple journey started in 2006 a routine dental appointment would usually be completely straightforward, until then I had never really given much thought to what ITP sufferers should do in respect of such matters. 

Would ITP make any difference to my dental treatment ? What should I tell my dentist about my illness, my medication, my current and future treatment ? Did he need to know ? Why did he need to know ? Could he treat me as a normal patient ? Could he treat me at all ? 

For most people the merest hint of a dental appointment usually sets the collies wobbling. For some it's the buzzing of the drill, for others it's the smell of antiseptic or the taste of the mouth wash. Whatever turns us off, dental appointments are not much fun. 

Luckily I have always had excellent treatment from my dentist. I can't say that a visit to my dentist has ever held any concerns at all. I guess I'm lucky in this respect. So a visit to my dentist as an ITP patient wouldn’t  be any different, would it ?

Well, er, yes actually, it's very different. Just to make me slightly anxious I had heard that a number of ITP patients indicated that they had great difficulty in finding a dentist who had any idea what ITP actually was. Surely things were not this bad ? It was not Victorian England where some people had wooden false teeth and some did DIY dentistry with pliers and string tied to door handles. Hard times indeed. 

The importance of getting regular dental checks is so important whether or not you have ITP but once under the purple influence it becomes even more vital. The phrase prevention rather than cure always comes to the fore when thinking about dental checks but with ITP it is absolutely imperative.

The last thing any of us with ITP needs is to have intrusive dental treatment, which is obviously going to be more difficult if we have a low or fluctuating platelet count. So by getting checked regularly and making sure we keep to good daily routines for oral hygiene, hopefully we can avoid treatment for things like fillings, gum disease and even extractions.

I knew that I had to tell my dentist that I had ITP.  I had to advise him what treatment I had received, what drugs I had been taking , what my latest platelet count was and what treatment regime I was gong to continue with. I knew all this because I had obtained a really useful leaflet from the ITP Support Association. It was very soberly entitled... Protocol for dentists treating patients with Thrombocytopenia. A protocol sounded like something the UN would have drawn up.  But nevertheless it was extremely helpful and I gave a copy to my dentist at my appointment.  

At the dental appointment, as ever, my dentist made things as easy as proverbial pie. He  is just very good at what he does. He's so professional, well informed, up to date with all the latest technology and information (He didn't even pay me to say any of that ! )  I told him that since we'd last met I'd been diagnosed with something called ITP.  Just like everyone else I’d told about my ITP, I thought he'd say something along the lines of ...... Well you don't look ill, I've never heard of it but I'm sure you'll be fine. 

What he actually said was that although he didn't have any other patients with ITP, he'd heard of it. He would treat me in a similar way to a haemophiliac, although he realised that there were many, many differences. He switched on his laptop and we looked up ITP. I'd given him my stodgily named Protocol for dentists leaflet already but he also looked up the ITP Support Association website there and then.

He took notes as I told him my purple history to date. He recorded details of my drugs...Prednisolone, Omeprazole, Alendronic Acid, Rituximab, Mycophenolate Mofetil, platelet count history, current treatment regime, name and contact details of my specialist and any other medical history of relevance.

I didn't have any other medical history apart from ITP so , that was pretty much that. Drama over, we just needed to do the dental bit. Just open wide, say cheese and hope for the best !

It may seem obvious that our dentist needs to know our platelet count. If any treatment is needed, especially an extraction, a platelet count under 50 may preclude that treatment from being carried out. 

If you are going to have any treatment it is sometimes necessary to get a blood test to check your platelet count before undergoing that treatment and with some people it may also be necessary to consult with your ITP specialist/haematologist. 

Advising our dentists of what medication we are currently taking and have taken for the last 12 months is also vital. Any drugs the dentist uses to anaesthetise us for example, may clash with any medications we have taken for our ITP or any other medical condition for that matter. 

Another problem is that should we encounter any pain following any dental interventions the only painkillers we can take are Paracetamol. ITP sufferers must avoid Aspirin or Ibuprofen. Having purple in your life gives you so many things to think about. 

For further information on all things ITP the following links are to the most reliable and up to date sources - 

The ITP Support Association - www.itpsupport.org.uk 

The Platelet Disorder Support Association - https://www.pdsa.org 

ITP Australia - https://itpaustralia.org.au/ 

[notanotherinfjblog]

Hey! I was reading your recent post on upper Te, and I was fascinated by your description/metaphor about how upper Tes, in a fight, will grab any object in a panic to fight with and upper Fes are more like precise assassins. I'm an INFP and my roommate is an ENTP. How would you describe upper Fi and Ti in a fight in these terms, from your perspective?

Hi anon! :)

Both high Fi and high Ti users tend to be extremely stubborn in their own ways and that's particularly noticeable in a fight. TPs, in my experience, go one of the following two ways: 1) they argue logically and try to completely derail your line of argument to make you see just how wrong you are and thus explain why they are reacting they way they are. An example: I was invited to a dinner with an ESTP recently and ESTP, as a vegan, basically got nothing to eat there. She didn't take it as a personal offence or anything, but instead, her line of argument was that they specifically asked beforehand for any dietary restrictions and then didn't account for them at all. Everything would have been fine if they hadn't asked, but since they did, they had the obligation to consider them and had no right to be mad at her for making a fuss about this. Or 2) they angrily storm off to physically detach themselves from the situation and sulk in silence until they've calmed down, but usually don't want to solve the fight afterwards, even if the other party wants to. Depending on how in touch they are with their low Fe, especially the ITPs are either completely unable to deal with other people's emotions and want to just push them aside because they don't understand what emotions have to do with the problem at hand as they are just in the way of finding a solution, or they can mediate a fight by calmly analysing everyone's emotional reactions and logically explain why the situation escalated into a fight (I know an ISTP who is very good at this).

FPs, on the other hand, do not argue with logic and do not account for other people's perspectives. Especially the FPs that hold very strong convictions on something can start unwarranted fights by their tone of voice alone. An example: someone says they took a plane to go on holiday to the Bahamas and wants to talk about the nice time they had there, and the FP interrupts them and goes "you do know that you are killing the planet with this, right?" and then doesn't understand why suddenly everyone in the room bands together against them (even if they agree with FP's point!) because this was not the time and place and especially not the right manner to discuss it. In fights, I always find that a lot of FPs act as if they have the moral high ground in every matter and are looking down on everyone for being so small and stupid, which often perpetuates a mutual disdain for each other. Other FPs who don't take themselves as seriously, however, would rather die than fight with people, which, in turn, can create conflict by itself. I know an ESFP, for instance, who always says yes to everything because she doesn't want to offend anyone and doesn't know how to say no. But when someone invites her, she says yes despite having no intention of ever showing up and then just ghosts them because she simply doesn't know what to say. At the same time, when someone else starts a fight with these kinds of softer FPs and launches personal attacks against them, their reactions often tend to be purely emotional internalisations along the lines of "damn, maybe I am as worthless as they say I am", not taking into account that no decent person would ever insult someone else like this and thus their word shouldn't count for anything. I have yet to meet any FJ or TP who would readily internalise and accept mean words as the truth without fighting back or at least classifying the rude person as an untrustworthy bastard. Some TJs in my experience, however, do internalise it as well, even if they defend themselves.

In general though, I'd say, the types that are the least likely to even want to find a compromise on anything, are FPs. Or as my INTJ brother often says about fights with his ENFP girlfriend: he may have a lot of convincing arguments, but ENFP will always be right and there's no changing that.

[askfnafcast]

((Ooc: ITP Springbonnie is the parental type. Mother, father, doesn't matter. He'll knit you a sweater, show up at your events, be proud even if he doesn't get it. However if you let him fulfill this role he will act out in aggression at anyone he perceives as wronging you, even if slight.

He can cook, please eat everything he makes.

He cannot speak with a voice of his own but can use other's voices and mostly repeat stuff they've said

[drsteggy]

I sent a Very Good Dog to the other side today.

Pete was 14. I met him when he was 4, and diagnosed him with immune mediated thrombocytopenia-his immune system was shredding up platelets. Happily though, it was found before he was sick. This disease can be a terrifying disaster, difficult to manage and silent until it’s a catastrophe. But sometime you get lucky and find it when it’s smoldering. Pete’s owners trusted me when I told them their seemingly normal dog was potentially in grave danger and they treated him, and he never had a problem with it.

Pete’s owners decided I worked miracles after that. They told me so at every chance they had. And while they would see any vet for routine things, when Pete had a problem, it was me or someone I recommended. Over the years, Pete had bouts with IBD as well as his ITP. I loved working with Pete and his people. They were gentle and gracious and they always made sure I knew they appreciated me. If I had to return a call to them, I always saved them to the end of my day, because they always made me feel better after speaking to them.

Then I left the job I met them on, and I was sad to not see them. I can’t tell clients where I go when I go, I just have to hope they might find me. Pete’s owners tracked me down inside of a month.

I always knew when Pete arrived. He had a distinct voice, and he would “sing” in the waiting room. When I saw him in March, I heard him first..but his voice was different. That’s the day I found the mass on his thyroid. Days later, the state shut down and I could not get a hold of Pete’s owners. They always returned my calls, and they just...didn’t. I worried. Pete’s dad worked in a hospital as a pharmacist. I hoped he was ok, but I had no idea.

And in June, they called.

It was such a relief to hear Pete’s dad on the phone.

Pete was 14 now. His owners had fled to Vermont, but were still coming south to work on site every few weeks. He wasn’t doing well. He was having seizures and lost weight. They brought him to me a few days later and we decided to not pursue a bunch of diagnostics, but to just keep him comfortable and happy.

And then I left that job, and sort of floated for a few weeks. I started a new job 2 weeks ago. Today, I got a message from Pete’s mom. She was in tears when I called. Pete wasn’t doing well, and they were in Vermont. He was vomiting, and stopped eating. We discussed some supportive care things they could try, and I told them I was in the office until 6, and in tomorrow and I would definitely squeeze them in, if they wanted.

Four hours later, Pete and his mom were in the parking lot. We are curbside these days, so just Pete came into my exam room, his mom on the phone. He didn’t sing. He was thin. He looked tired. We talked. She called her husband. We decided today was the day for Pete’s euthanasia.

We are allowing clients in for euthanasia, so Pete’s mom came in, in gloves and a mask and we sat on the floor, with Pete’s dad on FaceTime. I gave Pete a sedative, and he fell asleep on a blanket on the floor. I gave him the second injection and Pete’s owners talked him on, telling him to go see one of their other dogs, and telling him to watch over me.

I don’t cry at every euthanasia, but I cried at this one. I gave Pete’s mom a hug, though we both know that’s risky behavior these days. She told me she loved me and that they would follow me no matter where I go.

It is easy in this job, to be eaten whole by the angry and ungrateful. It is easy to remember when you are told you don’t care by someone who is frustrated and lashing out. Even when you tell yourself that person was striking out at you because they can’t strike at the thing they are actually upset with. You’re just an easy target. Even when you tell yourself that, the words sting and you wonder why you chose this.

It’s the ten years you get with a Pete and his owners.

[maraariana01]

ITP: Happy Ending AU !!

ik the ending in ITP is already a happy ending but y'all know i love Spring Bonnie so <3 i made it even happier

ok so as i mentioned in this post , basically: an AU where instead of "dying", Spring Bonnie starts living with Oswald's family :] he just wants to be a dad let him be a dad,,,,,,,

at the end of the book, Spring actually feels bad for biting Oswald and stops attacking him. (the dark matter inside him makes him do things he doesn't want to. he's learning how to deal with it.) so he lets Oswald save his dad from the ball pit, therefore now everyone is able to see Spring Bonnie as Spring Bonnie, not Oswald's dad.

aaaand now he's part of the family :] it took a while for Oswald and (especially) his parents to get used to having a giant rabbit animatronic roaming around their house but they slowly accepted him as they realized he's not really as bad as he seems.

and before you start calling him "William", don't. he's not William i will steal your fucking kneecaps. he's just bunnie,,,

anyway he accidentally stole someone's coat (as in, the person was too terrified to say anything and let Spring keep it sjdhjffhfj) and now he's basically like "hey look im wearing clothes! just like humans :D" he's just trying his best to act like humans, y'know,,,,,

i think that's it for now hope you enjoy <3

[cyber-streak-extra]

The ITP: Happy Ending AU is made @maraariana01

Title: Sick Day with The Bunny

Today was a Monday, Spring Bonnie had noticed. The bunny made his way towards his son’s room, planning on checking to see if he was awake, and to drive him to school once he was ready.

He was awake, but, something seemed noticeably wrong. Spring Bonnie’s ears lowered. Oswald was under his covers, Jackie sitting beside him on the edge of the bed.

As he moved closer, he noticed that Jackie was holding a tiny container, which had some sort of liquid in it. As Oswald coughed, she held it out for her son. The boy frowned.

“Sorry, honey,” She gently responded, “You’ve got to take it, okay?”

Oswald nodded, taking the little container. He stared at the liquid for a few seconds, before sighing, and drinking it. He gagged, but managed to swallow whatever the liquid was.

“Good,” Jackie took the container from her son.

As Spring Bonnie moved closer, his footsteps alerted the two of them, and Jackie turned away from her son, and faced the bunny.

“Hey...” Oswald waved. His voice sounded... different.

Spring Bonnie took out his notepad and pen, writing something down—although it seemed to be getting a little difficult due to the ink—it just seemed to be running out.

“What’s the matter?” He wrote.

“He’s just a little sick.” Jackie sighed. She would’ve liked to stay here and watch him, but it still wasn’t too bad—and her job was always rather demanding. She’d have to leave a lot to help Oswald, but they weren’t going to allow that.

Spring Bonnie hadn’t seen Thomas, so the bunny assumed that he must have already left. “Spring Bonnie,” Jackie started, “While I’m gone, do you think you could watch him for me?”

Since she’d first noticed him in the room, she must have been able to tell how the bunny seemed concerned. She added, “He’ll be fine. This just happens sometimes, Spring Bonnie. We get sick.”

Jackie knew that the bunny knew of her job as a nurse, but did he actually know about human sickness or anything like that? Aside from when Oswald got bitten, the bunny hadn’t seen any of them hurt or sick before.

Spring Bonnie nodded. “I can.” He wrote down.

“Here, give me your notepad for a second, please.” She held out her free hand. Another nod, and the bunny carefully handed it to her.

He was going to hand her his pen, but it seemed like the bunny didn’t need to do so—as she already had her own. Silently, she began writing on one of the pages.

As she did so, Spring Bonnie moved around to one of the sides of the bed, kneeling down beside it and Oswald. He reached over, gently grasping one of his son’s hands.

Spring Bonnie’s ears shot up in surprise when Oswald suddenly—and loudly—sneezed. “Bless you,” He heard Jackie, who was still writing, say.

Eventually, Jackie tapped his shoulder to get Spring Bonnie’s attention, and he turned. She was holding the notepad out for him. He took it with the hand that wasn’t holding Oswald’s.

He scanned over it. At the top were the words “Instructions”, and below had to be them—there seemed to be a type of medicine she listened (with there even being a little picture). It seemed to be what Jackie had given Oswald a few moments ago.

“I’ve got to go now.” She stood up, making her way towards Oswald’s bedroom door. Before Jackie disappeared out of the room, she turned back for a moment, waving.

...

“How did this happen?” Oswald glanced at the notepad, rubbing at his watery eyes.

The boy sighed and sniffled. “W... well, a few days ago,” He startled, clearing his throat. Spring Bonnie listened. “Dylan was... he was sick. And he was around me.”

“I... I guess that’s how I got sick...” He frowned.

Spring Bonnie’s ears twitched. He would’ve frowned. The bunny had heard of Dylan before—he was a kid at Oswald’s school, who seemed to enjoy bullying his son—and not just in this year or the one before.

Some days, Oswald would complain about Dylan, and it just made the bunny more upset whenever he heard anything about the boy. Why did he want to mess with his son? He shouldn’t be bullied.

The bunny and his son heard the sound of the door moving—and when Spring Bonnie looked, it seemed like the noise had been caused by Jinx.

The cat walked around the room, before stopping in front of the bed. She looked around for a moment, before jumping up onto the bunny—his ears shooting up in surprise—before jumping off of him, and landing on the bed.

She glanced back at Spring Bonnie for a moment, giving a quick hiss at the bunny, before moving to lay on Oswald’s side.

...

From the instructions that Jackie had left him, now seemed like the time to give his son more of that medicine that he had seen earlier. The bunny left the bedroom, making his way to the kitchen.

The medicine was left out on the table, where Spring Bonnie would easily be able to find and get it, instead of searching through some of the cabinets.

After the bunny gathered everything, he made his way back to his son’s room. He had the medicine, but some water, too—and some food that Jackie’s little instructions said that Oswald could have.

As he reached the bed, Jinx hopped off, and left the room. He sat down beside the bed, carefully handing the medicine to Oswald—which was in another little container.

He pointed at it, and then Oswald. Drink.

Oswald hated this medicine. But, he nodded, hurriedly putting it into his mouth. He reached over, grabbing the water that Spring Bonnie had brought, and sipped it.

Spring Bonnie gave his son a little thumbs up, before handing his son the food. He was probably hungry.

...

Even though he was sick, Oswald didn’t want to just lay there doing nothing. So, he picked out one of his video games that he beat countless times, and started to play.

Spring Bonnie watched curiously from where he sat. He knew what video games were, he’d seen some before—back through the ball pit and in the pizzeria, there had been some arcade games. But, these ones were different.

Oswald noticed how his adoptive bunny father was watching, and glanced at him, not bothering to pause the video game. “Do you... want to try?”

Spring Bonnie shook his head, and motioned for his son to continue. He partially did want to try, he did—but, he didn’t want to break anything accidentally.

Oswald nodded, turning away from him, and refocusing on the game just in time to avoid a game over.

...

After a while, the decision had been made to watch one of Oswald’s favorite monster movies—which, surprisingly, Spring Bonnie hadn’t seen until now—he’d just seen a lot of different other films.

It was interesting.

As the movie was nearing its credits, Oswald tiredly yawned, leaning against the bunny, and closing his eyes—although he wasn’t asleep.

Spring Bonnie paused the movie. When the decision had been made, the two of them had decided to watch it in the living room. He used his coat to keep Oswald warm, just in case he got cold.

He guessed he should bring his son back to his room now, maybe Oswald would prefer to be there—especially if he went to sleep. Carefully, Spring Bonnie picked up his son, and got off the couch.

When the movie had still been going, Spring Bonnie had given him more of that medicine, and listened to the rest of the instructions, so he didn’t need to do much else for a bit.

Oswald kept his eyes closed. He was tired.

Soon enough, the two of them reached the bedroom, and Spring Bonnie placed him back under the covers, carefully removing the coat from the boy in the process.

Oswald felt himself being tucked in. And he thought that was it. But, with Spring Bonnie still leaning down from tucking him in, the boy felt something gentle, yet cold, against his forehead.

His eyes opened barely, and he saw Spring Bonnie pulling away, before closing them again. The bunny must have given him a forehead kiss.

Thanks, dad. Oswald thought to himself, before drifting off to sleep.

...

Spring Bonnie tucked his son in, carefully removing the coat from him in the process—he didn’t want his son to be too hot under there or anything.

Remaining lowered, the bunny moved closer, ear’s twitching gently. Once the bunny was close enough, he gently pressed his ‘lips’ against his son’s forehead, before backing up.

He sat down on the floor of the bedroom. Rest well, son, The bunny thought to himself. He hoped this sickness would fade quickly. He wanted his son better.

But, no matter what, the bunny was going to be there for his son.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Attack Surface in Wired

My next book, Attack Surface - AKA Little Brother 3  - drops in the US/Canada tomorrow (it's came out in other English-speaking countries on Oct 1) and today, Wired's Andy Greenberg published his review of the series and the new book.

It's excellent.

https://www.wired.com/story/his-writing-radicalized-young-hackers-now-he-wants-to-redeem-them/

Attack Surface is a standalone Little Brother book for adults, telling the story of Masha Maximow, a complicated sometimes-villain from the first two Little Brother books. While Marcus Yallow spends those books fighting surveillance, Masha is one of the people building in.

At first, Masha feels like she has good reasons for doing what she does, redirecting her trauma of living through a terrorist attack into making her city and country safer.

But as she moves from the DHS to some Beltway Bandits contracting in an Iraq Forward Operations Base, hunting insurgents, she increasingly turns to compartmentalization and rationalization as a means of living with her own reflection in the mirror.

Finally, she finds herself in the former USSR, where a new employer puts her to work spying on pro-democracy activists for brutal oligarchs, and to assuage her conscience, she moonlights teaching those same activists to resist her employer's surveillance gear.

This self-destructive behavior can't last long - as Masha flees her (former) employer's wrath, she returns to San Francisco, where her childhood best friend is now a racial justice organizer being targeted by the cyberweapons Masha herself built.

What follows is the story of Masha's moral reckoning, and moral reckonings are the theme of Greenberg's piece: after all, Little Brother and Homeland inspired a legion of pro-user, anti-surveillance technologists and activists.

But it also led plenty of people into tech careers that have been devoted to taking away the freedom and power that Little Brother excited in them to begin with.

Indeed, virtually everyone working on surveillance, ad-tech, or DRM started with the life-changing experience of discovering how code could project your will around the world, and how networks could set your mind free to wander the globe in search of likeminded communities.

And now, every day, they go to work making sure no one else will have that experience. Like all of us, they make a compromise, which begets a compromise, which begets yet another and another, and one day you find yourself working for Palantir or NSO Group.

Indeed, under conditions of monopoly capitalism, a sizeable fraction of us, in tech and out, spend our lives (and our money) furthering the interests of companies and states that are destroying those lives, and the planet too.

In the book, Masha thinks about this as a form of debt, like the "tech debt" that ever programmer has had to contend with: you take a shortcut, and then you have to prop it up in subsequent revisions, until the whole app is a teetering mess built on a crumbling foundation.

Like so many of us, Masha's moral debts have mounted and threaten catastrophic default. Attack Surface is the story of how she structures a bankruptcy that she can emerge from, transformed into a new and better person.

In his review, Greenberg talks with eminent human rights technologists about their own experience of the novel, and the tales he relates - many of which I read for the first time this morning - literally brought a tear of awesome, overwhelming joy and pride to my eye.

From Nathan Freitas, who put the book into the hands of every young technologist he met and then assigned it to his NYU ITP classes, where it found its way into the hands of Harlo Holmes, who calls it "fundamental to her origin story."

"It informed my thoughts around how privacy should work, the interplay between movement activists, technology and the law, and what you should look out for when inviting technologies into your life to do that movement building."

Today, Holmes is director of the Freedom of the Press Foundation, teaching activists and journalists to resist foundation - the Foundation is also home to Securedrop, which Aaron Swartz helped create. Aaron wrote an afterword for Homeland, and took his own life shortly before its publication.

I toured that book haunted by his specter, telling his story as best as I could at every stop. Then, years later, I happened on some video shot at that time: Laura Poitras's Academy Award-winning documentary CITIZENFOUR.

Homeland gets a cameo there, as Edward Snowden is packing his go-bag while he hustles out of his Hong Kong hotel room, heading for a HK safehouse, a plane, and then, thanks to John Kerry's decision to cancel his passport midflight, to a long-term exile in Russia.

Greenberg quotes Snowden on the book: "He is to me a radical idealist, because no matter how bad things get, his mind goes to the stories of cooperation and creation-sharing.

"When the traditional structures of oppression are up to no good, as was the case in Little Brother, Cory doesn't reflexively indoctrinate young readers with platitudes on the inevitability of corruption. He helps them reimagine the limits of their own power."

And then Greenberg quotes my EFF colleague Eva Galpering, who, like Masha, is a brilliant security researcher raised by Soviet refugees: "This is a book for the people who realize that they've grown up and made a lot of compromises, and about how you turn back from that."

Eva is joining me on the Attack Surface Lectures, a series of eight events that start tomorrow night.

https://read.macmillan.com/torforge/cory-doctorow-virtual-lecture-series/

Her remarks, and those of Greenberg's other sources, filled me with soaring joy this morning.

Even in the midst of my crushing, daily anxiety for the future of technology, the nations of my birth and residence, for my child and the planet she'll inherit, I was uplifted today.

These books of mine have gone far, thanks to readers like you. Today, with one day to go before Attack Surface's publication, I feel like, in some small way, I may have made a difference.

[funkymbtifiction]

Hi, Charity! I need help regarding my type. For reference, I believe I’m ENTJ or ISTP. I can’t tell which one due to my lack of self awareness. I also believe I’m an 8w9 sp/sx though I’m not sure about that as well if I really am an ISTP.

To be honest, based on what you wrote -- I don't know. You didn't go into what you think logic is, so it's hard for me to tell whether you are using analytical subjective logic (Ti) or detached and impersonal objective logic (Te).

I want you to read both of these posts by an ENTJ:

Extroverted Thinking vs Introverted Thinking

Another Comparison

I suspect Te for you.

To start off I’m a very blunt person and I don’t really care about others emotions who aren’t a priority in my life. The way I come off to others is a very matter of fact which can seem very off putting to others but I don’t really care about filtering. I also have trouble understanding others emotional decisions. When people have outbursts or get offended over certain topics, it irritates me because I can’t really understand why. To me, the facts are there so why get mad at the situation?

This could be either one, but might lean Te/TJ.

I have a hard time understanding my emotions even though I’m constantly aware of them. They’re separate from me as well as private. I don’t like sharing my emotions when I’m going through something emotional until I’ve let them out privately.

This seems more inferior Fi than Fe, especially if you've never "lost it" in front of others. 8 and inferior Fe tends to "leak" and explode.

It’s also hard for me to connect to others emotionally when I don’t know them very well. I have to pretend to care but can only for that for a bit before that tires me.

Could be either one.

[...] I’m also not reckless like an Se-dom and can predict when an action will have consequences. I’m aware of the future implications of my actions at least half the time. I just don’t like sitting there doing nothing, that’s boring and when I feel an opportunity is going to pass by, I feel a pit in my stomach that tells me to do something.

Again, could be either one. ISTPs are more far-sighted than ESTPs, but ENTJs are also impulsive and impatient to get going. But ISTPs who are 8s are more present-oriented than future-oriented, so factor that in.

The only thing that makes me not believe I’m a Ti-dom is that they’re so “logical” and see things as some computer system. I feel like I can’t understand that. When a Ti-user speaks, my brain gets confused bcs their thought processes are so weird. Honestly writing this, I’m even more confused. I’d appreciate your thoughts, thank you Charity! :D

If you are an ISTP, INTPs might annoy you for being super abstract, but you would at least understand why they think what they think. If you are ENTJ, ITPs would seem like extreme nitpickers for you, people hung up on pointlessly analyzing things rather than getting stuff done.