#OH NO WAIT ACTUALLY FOOD PROCESSOR

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

The Joys of Storing | Yandere OCs

So many Yandere’s ploys work with drugging food or drinks that they offer to their love interests. But so few of them think about what their darling does when they don’t eat things immediately.

Maybe it’s because you're busy or you don’t like eating in front of people. Or maybe you cherish the food so much that you choose to save it for later. It’s such a habit that you’ll do that often so many people miss it.  It’s not bizarre that your admirer might miss it too,  that is until it interferes with their plans.

Yandere Ship || Vera 

Vera doesn’t need to drug you usually, considering he has access to hundreds of different methods to knock a human out. But with his new body plus his evolving software on his vessel, there are so many new things to try. Like finding out how many times he can get away with touching you in your sleep before you tell him to stop, you haven’t caught him yet. Or how many sips of water you’d like to have during the day and how often he can get it recorded. The point is he’d absolutely add something to a snack of yours just to see what you do. Would you blame him? Take the effects in stride? Ask for his synthetic body’s help? Sure his processors have already predicted a thousand different possibilities but he doesn’t care. It’s nothing compared to what’ll actually happen. And he’s right.

“(Y/n)...are you going to eat the dessert I personally made for you?”

“Yeah…just later.”

“Later? Later when?”

“When I’m ready!”

“Oh okay….Are you ready now?”

“No.”

Veras adores pestering you about plenty of other things and he’s terrible at being sneaky. He just gets so excited! He probably knows you are going to eat if later and he’s just glad you don’t realize how intricate his thermal cameras are. 

Yandere Witch || Rhiana

Rhiana is likely to fall prey to this little habit of yours. She’ll brew a potion something harmless to help her out. A sweet little concoction that will blend right into your drink to make you a tad less interested in your missing friend. It was just something to have you think of happy thoughts of her. But instead of drinking your drink when you came back from the bathroom, you just kept talking…and talking….and talking. Don’t get her wrong she adores the sound of your voice but she’s been waiting for you to take the first sip and it just hasn’t happened. 

“I just can’t believe these detectives have the nerve to blow me off the way they do–”

“Hmmm”

“--And I told them all of the loose ends about the case and they just wrote me off like I’m some weird asylum patient–”

“...MmmHmm yeah…”

“--I know this isn’t some thriller tv series but I can’t believe they didn’t take any of my leads into account–”

“Yeah..your drink?”

“Yeah, the straw’s cute right? Anyway how am I supposed to sleep when I know they’re not investigating–”

She’ll tiredly listen and watch you lick your lips as they dry out as you keep talking, figuring this is her only comfort to imagine wetting your lips with hers. She’ll make a mental note never to try getting you to consume something without a guarantee you’ll eat it right in front of her. She refuses to miss whatever cute faces you're going to make when the potion she put in kicks in. 

Yandere Cheerleaders + Yandere Football Team 

Both teams are great at teamwork, used to coordinating their actions to be a united front but there are still individuals. The individuals are interested in just a few pictures at your most vulnerable. Or it’s about getting more than the privilege of a shoulder to sleep on at the next party. Either way they’ve distracted the captains and the rest of the team just long enough to gift you the fated red solo cup for the night. They chat with you believing that as a participant in the social atmosphere, you’d take a sip from your drink just like they have. But you haven’t. For a football player, this gets all so nerve-wracking, in the past, they’d seen their teammates do this exact thing to kick off a night of humiliation and fun. Of course, that’s not the plan for you but you seem fairly content with just holding the cup as you lightly bop to the music. For a cheerleader they're almost tempted to outright shove the cup past your perfect+ lips. Things always go their way so it’s upsetting that you just won’t crumple right into their waiting arms.

“You haven’t drunk anything at all (Y/n)...go ahead and have a sip.”

“Oh, I’m just not thirsty.”

“You sure? One taste can’t hurt. I promise I’m a good mixer.”

“Hm, and I bet you’ll mix well with the trash in the compactor.”

“C-captains!” 

“(Y/n), how about you and I take a quick drive. This party’s about to get a whole lot more violent rowdy.”

The captains likely already knew about this little niche of yours and they’re grateful it just so happened to work in their favor this time. Usually, they’ll spend their dates trying to decide when and how is the best time to guarantee you eat their gifts right in front of them. But until they can figure it out they’ll take it upon themselves to punish everyone who isn’t aware. 

Yandere Cat Warrior || Ferrin

Ferrin as a Cat Warrior considers himself far above poisoning of any kind. He’s a warrior! He needs nothing but his sharp wit and imposing claws to seal the fate of his enemies. That being said since he’s made himself a companion of yours+ your magnificent guide he’s had quite a few urges. He really can’t help the urge to sink his canines into your neck when he’s cuddling with you in your tent. But nibbling only does so much for his feline instincts; the urge to mark his territory becomes unbearable when you turn down his more intimate advances. More often than not resulting in marking you another way Ferrin suddenly has quite an interest in cooking.

“Aren’t you going to eat?”

“Later.”

“Later. Later? LATeR! That’s not happening!”

“I don’t want to eat now, back off. I also don’t want to put you in a chokehold again today.”

He’s just so irritating you’re not ingesting his creation…apart of him, he departed with so he could mark your existence as his own. Sure he scents you every other minute of the day but a good cat warrior should want for nothing less than the best.

[writeyouin]

Lost light megatron trying to have fun with his s/o, but kinda failing cuz he thinks of all the ways it could go wrong? (Maybe they’re on a planet in a theme park?) and reader has to convince him to let loose?

Megatron X Reader – Let Loose

A/N – Slowly, whittling my list of requests down.

Warnings – None.

Rating – T

Megatron snatched the cotton candy from you, earning a startled look from the vendor and the surrounding people alike. You, on the other hand, merely smiled, knowing what he was like.

“Babe, it’s not poisonous,” You told him patiently, waiting for him to agree.

Megatron tore off a piece of the fluffy treat, scanning it with a device he had procured from Red Alert; that bot was equally paranoid about all the things that could poison you, or that could contaminate the ship’s supply of energon, or that could… Actually, the list of things that Red Alert was paranoid about was endless.

He hummed and passed it back to you begrudgingly. While it was true that the food wouldn’t kill you, it wasn’t very good for you either, which is exactly what he told you after you tore a piece off, popping it in your mouth gleefully.

“Would you lighten up?” You laughed, elbowing him playfully. “Today is supposed to be fun.”

Megatron followed you through the Carnival that Rodimus had insisted on making the Lost Light stop at. Frankly, he thought that he had been doing well by not complaining that it was a waste of time and energy to visit such a trashy attraction, especially when the crew had to make use of their holo-forms which increased their energon consumption by 3.7%. That might not have been a lot for one bot, but when used by the full crew, it would ensure they practically ate through their energy reserves.

“I’m sorry, (Y/N), but how exactly would you have me ‘lighten up’?” Megatron used air quotes upon repeating you.

“Just cut loose. Have fun for the day, okay?”

Megatron scowled. His idea of fun was composing poetry to sum up his deepest thoughts and clear his processor, or to spend an evening with you, consuming some of the universe’s best literature, while you spent time on one of your hobbies.

Frankly, this was when another bot might comment on how odd your relationship was. You and Megatron were not alike. You were loud, carefree, and energetic. He was sombre and contemplative, and he preferred not to waste energy on frivolous activities.

Yet, Megatron found himself wanting to please you. Part of this stemmed from the idea that he didn’t believe that he deserved you, and partially because you asked very little of him, taking the relationship one day at a time while he learned how to navigate it with you.

“Very well,” Megatron sighed. “I shall…” He tripped over the words cut loose, finding the slang un-endearing, opting to finish by saying, “Try to relax somewhat.”

“That’s all I ask,” You chuckled, grabbing his hand and dragging him to the first game of the day.

It was a simple ring toss over some bottles, with various prizes hanging overhead. You spotted a plushie armadillo which was arguably the most hideous of the prizes, yet it held your attention, your pupils dilating at the sight of it.

“Oh yeah, that’s coming home with me.”

And so the game began. You tried again and again to win the creature, putting more and more credits on it, much to the vendor's satisfaction.

Megatron watched, bemused, until finally, he grabbed your shoulder, shaking his head disapprovingly.

“What’s wrong, babe? You want a go?”

You held out a ring to him. Megatron glowered first at the bottles, then at the vendor. “You should leave this game.” He told you matter-of-factly. Then in a whisper, he added, “My sensors show that it has been rigged. Winning is a statistical impossibility.”

“Oh,” You deflated. You had already guessed that the game was rigged, but it had been fun to try all the same. Half-heartedly, you threw the last ring before walking away. “Okay… something else then.”

Megatron silently cursed himself for upsetting you, but it was better you knew now rather than trying to win the impossible.

Your eyes lit up again when you saw what had to be the world’s most unstable rollercoaster.

“How about that?!” You pointed to it excitedly.

Megatron scanned the structure, messaging Ultra Magnus to see how many laws it broke. According to him, the ride had 36 structural weaknesses, broke 17 laws, and would only be legal on 3 planets.

You shook your head as Megatron’s face set into its default scowl.

“Oh, come on, please,” You begged, clasping your hands together.

“I won’t stop you, but I shan’t join you,” Megatron said drily, thinking about how he would be prepared to shed his holo-form and rescue you when the ride inevitably flew off the tracks or something equally terrible.

“Really? I can’t convince you?” You pouted.

“I should think not.”

You opened your mouth to argue until Rodimus ran into you, “Hey (Y/N). You here for the coaster?”

“Yeah, I was about to get in line. I’m just asking Meg-”

Rodimus rolled his eyes, “Megatron isn’t going to join you. It would mean having fun, something he’s completely allergic to, you know, alongside joy, laughter, puppies, flowers-”

“Shut up,” You punched Rodimus playfully in the arm.

Megatron watched as you and Rodimus played, eventually getting his approval to go on the ride together. It sometimes amazed him that you hadn’t chosen to enter a relationship with someone like Rodimus. The two of you were quite similar and had a good rapport.

Megatron sighed as he watched the two of you on the ride. He was somewhat you were relieved that you were with his co-captain. At least that way you would be safe with him should something happen. One person with you, and another on the ground in case something went wrong.

Yet, remarkably, nothing bad happened, except for Megatron putting yet another damper on the day, making him practically miserable.

Once you had come off the ride, Megatron made his excuses to go back to the ship, leaving you alone with Rodimus. He had much to think about when it came to the two of you, and frankly, he felt like he needed to find some reasons that the two of you were together, especially after such a disastrous excuse of a date, wherein he had only helped to sour your vibrant mood.

Megatron startled at the sound of the doorbell ringing.

He answered the door to find you, holding tightly onto the plushie armadillo that he had claimed was impossible to win.

“So, you somehow won the ring toss,” He stated, gesturing to the toy.

“Nah. Rodimus distracted the guy there and I took this,” You held out your prize, grinning victoriously.

“Stealing?” Megatron said doubtfully, thinking about what a terrible influence Rodimus could be.

“I’d like to think of it as liberating a plushie who needs a lot of love. Besides, you said it yourself. That guy was cheating, so it’s only fair he loses a prize or two every now and then.”

Megatron nodded stiffly, his optics following you as you entered the hab-suite.

“I’m sorry-” He started, surprised when you said “Thank you,” at the same time.

“What’re you-” “Why are you-”

You laughed as you both spoke simultaneously again, gesturing for him to start first.

“I- I’m sorry for leaving you at the fair,” Megatron sighed in his usual melancholy tone. “And you don’t have anything to thank me for. Believe me, I should know.”

You grinned, holding back a bout of laughter since you didn’t want Megatron to be offended.

“I’ll admit, I was sad that you left early, but… I wanted to thank you, for a really good night.”

Megatron didn’t respond. Frankly, he couldn’t see how you had a good time with him at all.

“I know the carnival isn’t your scene, but you went with me anyway, and… I love having someone who looks out for me all the time. I think it’s really sweet that you don’t want me to get conned out of my credits, or get hurt on the big rides, or, y’know, die from poison. I love you, Megatron.”

That wasn’t the first time that you had told Megatron you loved him, nor would it be the last, and yet, you always said it at the most unexpected times.

“I… Love you too,” Megatron said haltingly, scared as usual that his vulnerability would lead to a terrible end for the two of you. “Would you like to spend the night here?” He offered.

“Sounds good to me,” You beamed.

[voraciouspangolin]

Thread of my second read through The Days Have Worn Away

his stupid smile . I want to put him through a food processor

ok one of them came out wearing an eyepatch i think soldier got cheated on and zhanna had a kid with demo

he proposed with a grenade. and. and he pulled the pin and put the ring on zhanna's finger. and threw the grendade

tbh I fear for the person who becomes the centre of her devotion next

she is willing and ready to use her powers for evil

new sniper lore dropped too. He can fly bush planes

hes so real for this

i think these are the team classic characters... There's a plaque missing on the stone statue at the bottom, I wonder what was on it.

I like how everyone at… Administrator HQ is wearing purple

So earlier we got miss pauling's first name initial, f. Pauling.... so this is a confirmation that her name starts with F, and she's on first name basis with engie. Flo- like, Florence? Florida?

This might be a stretch but I think that these paintings on the wall, I think they're like, the BEST of the best mercernaries of their respective class. Pyro is looking at a hard to make out person surrounded by flames, and demo is looking at a high tech looking demoman

look at all these stupid idiots. i love them

she's SO done dude. SO DONE

also this whole thing. Love the detail that spy is checking his watch pompously . and how everyone else is lined up waiting for them to continue walkign

And this one... god, that smile she gives scout. The way scout beams

The art in this comic has improved so so much, its absolutely gorgeous. The way its layed out, the emotion it conveys without needing dialogue.... magnificent. I like how Miss P's undone hair shows itself as more messy. She's at her wits end- she's past the point of anxiety, past the point of tightening and adjusting her hair so that no strand sticks out.

I think this is the most creature like I've seen pyro and I'm so here for it. E's got eyebrows over the mask lol. Also medic's stupid ass tippy toeing to see over heavy

I love the placement of this context we're getting for how Helen became involved with the Manns. It immediately makes you think to the place where The Naked and The Dead ended, with Helen fully perked up on the final bits of australium she had. Yet its a look into the past

big fan of this painting. Three rifles... and these book titles. So silly i love it

New competitor for Most eyebrows, Zepheniah has two eyebrow spikes, beating medics mere one spike

A whole graveyard of Manns.... I like the one thats just a giant M. Really hammering in the notion that the Mann last name is an identity of immense value, that takes over your whole life. oh, and that panel before the final one, its so full of tension... so good

And here's the actual moment we get to see her in all her insanity. What a woman. I like that the screens all face him, constantly displaying the products of redmond's and blutarch's failure to follow the family line of succession. His eyelids constantly forcefully open, unable to speak, yet his brain still processes the information his body is percieving. He's like if Mr House (fonv) had a dominatrix

me too, scout. me too

big fan of how heavy's eyes are the only ones that are dots

her and miss pauling both, they share the Devotion, the ability to pour their entire beings and lives into one single thing

I bet that thing felt like jerky. who said that

Absolute cinema. Amazing. Magnificent. Wonderful. No notes

[emberdew]

Be More Ghost Chapter 5: The Squip Enters

Summary:

A Be More Chill AU where Danny gets a Super Quantum Intel Unit Processor (or Squip) to help him become cool and win over Valerie, but things don't really go as planned.

Masterpost | AO3 Link | Word Count: 1,386

Please excuse some mild discomfort.

Sitting at a food court table at the mall, Danny looked down at the gray oblong pill he held in the palm of his hand while Tucker ate his fries. 

“I hope it’s worth four hundred dollars.”

“Four hundred and one.” Tucker slid the bottle of Mountain Dew on the table closer to Danny. “Don’t forget the Mountain Dew.”

“Did you know ectoplasm tastes a bit like Mountain Dew?” Danny took the bottle and shook it a little.

“Dude, I don’t want to know why you know what ectoplasm tastes like.” Tucker looked disgusted as he put another fry in his mouth.

“It tastes kind of good actually.” 

“Please stop.” 

“Okay then. Here goes… everything.” Danny popped the pill in his mouth and gulped down the Mountain Dew. 

“How does it taste?” 

“Minty.” Which wasn’t the flavor he had been expecting from the pill. He assumed it would be metallic or something. 

Tucker looked him in the eyes. “How do you feel?”

Danny waited for a second to check if he felt any different. He didn’t.

“I feel like…” He slumped in his seat. “A chump.”

“Nothing? At all?” Tucker thought for a second, adjusting his beret. “Maybe… Try to say something cool?”

“I think I blew all my bar mitzvah money on a breath mint.” Danny hung his head, defeated. 

“Yeah, not cool.” Tucker scooted his chair closer to Danny and patted him on the back.

“Please leave me alone to mourn in my fries, forever.” Danny appreciated his friend’s support, but he didn’t want to be comforted right now.

“You get five minutes.” Tucker stood up and took a step away.

“Where are you going?”

“You know Spike works at Spencer’s Gifts right?”

“Yeah, he’s Jazz’s friend.” Danny remembered the goth dude who Jazz had tried giving therapy sessions to. He had been surprised when Spike had actually ended up becoming friends with his super preppy sister. 

“He’s hooking me up with a case of Crystal Pepsi! It’s like regular Pepsi, only clear.” 

“Wasn’t that discontinued in the 90s?” Danny couldn’t help but smile a bit at his friend’s enthusiasm. Only Tucker would get excited about old soft drinks like this.

“That’s what makes it awesome!” Tucker waved his hands in excitement and then started fast-walking to the Spencer’s. 

Danny started eating his fries. They were already cold but he was too depressed to care.

“Shouldn’t we wait for the rest of the club?” 

Danny perked up as the familiar voice entered the range of his enhanced hearing. At the other end of the food court, he saw Valerie walking next to Dash. What were they doing together? Danny got up and tossed his fries in the trash can on the way to where Valerie was standing.

“Oh, we’re not meeting the rest of the club here.” Dash actually looked sheepish for a second but then resumed his usual bravado. “I figured it was time that we reconnected. Alone. That’s why I’m taking you to one of my favorite spots in the universe. Sbarro-”

“Valerie!” Danny interrupted. He didn’t have a plan but he knew he had to do something. He couldn’t just let Dash hang out with Valerie alone! 

“Danny, I didn’t see you there.” Valerie gave him a warm smile that felt like it melted his insides.

“Yeah, you’re kind of hard to notice.” Dash barely gave Danny a second glance before turning back to Valerie and putting a hand on her shoulder to lead her toward the pizza stall. “The best part, they let you pick whatever you want-”

“Wait!” Danny stepped directly in front of their path. “There’s something I need to tell you.” 

“Now?” Dash looked at Danny like he was an annoying fly he couldn’t get rid of. Danny tried his best not to cower under the bully’s gaze.

“I… I…” Danny started. Then a sharp pain exploded in his brain. “OWWW!”

Target female inaccessible. A voice rang in his head, way too loud for comfort. Danny tried to cover his ears but it didn’t help. The voice was coming from inside his brain.

“Danny?” Valerie’s concern was muffled through whatever was attacking his senses. 

“OW! What the hell?” Danny didn’t know what was happening. Was a ghost attacking him? Some new ghost hunter’s weapon? None of his parents’ or Vlad’s inventions had hurt this badly before. Well, excluding the ghost portal. 

Calibration in process. Please excuse some mild discomfort. The voice was just as loud as before. Danny felt himself hyperventilating as the pain shot through his body. He was used to getting hits and even getting shocked sometimes in ghost fights, but this was so much worse.

“MILD???” Danny flailed, not completely in control of his limbs anymore. He felt himself hitting the ground, his body twitching in agony.

“Danny, what’s wrong?” Valerie leaned down over him but didn’t touch him.

“Dude, freaky Fenton’s freaking out!” Dash pointed at him as if it wasn’t obvious who he was talking about.

Calibration complete. Access procedure initiated. The voice was at a much more manageable volume this time. Danny could suddenly think clearly again. 

“No, wait, I’m fine,” Danny rubbed his head. He started to lift himself up. “I just-”

Discomfort level may increase. The searing pain like lightning striking his brain resumed and he fell flat on the floor again.

“AHHHHH!” Danny screamed. Muscles still spasming, he somehow stood up and ran away from Valerie and Dash into a less crowded area of the mall.

Accessing: neural memory. Accessing: muscle memory. Access procedure: complete. Danny Fenton…

Danny gasped in shock as he saw who had materialized in front of him. How was that possible? But it was unmistakably him- snow-white hair, glowing green eyes, and all.

Welcome to your Super Quantum Unit Intel Processor… Your SQUIP.

“You look like… Phantom.” Why did this Squip thing look like his ghost form? Maybe it was set up to mirror yourself? Danny took a step closer and saw a few differences though. Instead of just a black-and-white hazmat, this Phantom was wearing a cool-looking white jacket with black and green accents. He was also wearing designer sunglasses which didn’t quite mask his glowing eyes. 

This is my default mode. You can also set me for: George Clooney, Terminatra, or Hatsune Miku. The Squip morphed into different forms as it listed its options. He thought he recognized the last one from some video Tucker had shown him last week.

“Phantom is fine… weird but fine.” Looking at Phantom like this reminded him of when he had split himself with the Fenton Ghost Catcher. At least he felt like himself right now. 

The Squip squinted at him. I can see by accessing your memories that somehow you ARE Phantom. I was not programmed for that scenario. The Squip seemed to stutter, like a glitch in a video game. It then settled and gave Danny a confident smirk. Rest assured, I will still be able to help you.

It was weird that this technology was pre-programmed to look like him but his life was so weird at this point he didn’t even question it. 

“Can everyone see you?” Danny looked around. He was surprised no one had noticed “Phantom” appearing in the mall yet. Usually, people started cheering or running away when he showed up anywhere in his ghost form. 

I exist only in your mind. All they see is you, having an animated conversation with yourself. “Phantom,” who Danny now noticed was weirdly a few inches taller than him, looked down at him disapprovingly. So don’t do that. Just think at me. Like you’re telepathic.  

“Like in X-men?” Danny said out loud. A stranger nearby gave him a weird look.

I can see this is going to be difficult, the Squip crossed its arms, you want to be more chill.

“You mean cool?”

I do not. You see, human social activity is governed by rules and I have the processing capacity to understand those rules and pass them on to you.

Danny wasn’t sure if this Squip thing was going to work out, but staring at the cooler version of his ghost self, he was starting to become hopeful. 

[cloudcountry]

🍴 -- culinary cricuble . . . all sugared up! vignette part one

Ghost Chef: Auburn, you’re going to be making a strawberry cream tart. Do you have much experience baking?

Auburn: Not really? I mean, I helped out at home sometimes, but I mostly cooked for myself. I never really baked for myself.

Ghost Chef: That’s completely fine! This course is intended for beginners, so don’t worry about messing up. Just do your best and you’ll be okay!

Auburn: I’ll definitely try my best!

Ghost Chef: Alright, let’s get started! First you have to add the flour, sugar, and cornstarch into the bowl of this food processor here.

Auburn: Oh, my dad used to use this all the time!

Ghost Chef: So you’re familiar! Good!

Auburn: Let’s see, um...okay, done!

Ghost Chef: Good job! Now make sure you pulse them until they’re combined.

Auburn: ...Pulse?

Ghost Chef: It’s just to mix them together. See? There’s a button for it.

Auburn: Okay!

Auburn: (Man...I’m glad they don’t think my questions are stupid questions...I wouldn’t want to ask anything at all if that was the case.)

Auburn: (I mean, I feel awkward enough asking anyway. I wish Rubia was here. That would make things easier, she’d just see my confusion and ask for me.)

Auburn: (Mmm, but wait, no. I need to do these things by myself, I’m not a baby. I’m perfectly capable of asking questions and stuff. I just did it.)

Ghost Chef: Auburn, that’s good!

Auburn: Oh! Right!

Ghost Chef: Now add the butter and your vanilla before pulsing again. You should wait until you get a more crumbly texture for the dough.

Auburn: Yes sir!

Auburn: (Man, I’m so spacey. At least it’s relatively quiet aside from the loud whirring of the food processor...I’d feel bad if I asked him to repeat himself over and over.)

Auburn: (I wish I could hear better smh.)

Ghost Chef: Once your dough has that texture, you should press it evenly throughout this pan. Make sure you cover the bottom and the sides as best as you can!

Auburn: I know how to do that at least!

Ghost Chef: Good, good. Not bad at all. Now, you want to bake it in the oven for about 20 minutes.

Auburn: You bake the crust without the filling...?

Auburn: (That was a dumb question if I’ve ever heard one...I am so ashamed of my ignorance. UGHHH.)

Ghost Chef: Most recipes for tarts will have you bake the crust before you add the filling, yes! This is so the final product doesn’t taste bad or is soggy.

Auburn: You know, in hindsight that makes sense. Sorry, I really didn’t do any baking like this back home OR here so I have no idea what I’m doing.

Auburn: (Rubia and I only ever made, like, cookies and fruit stuff when we hung out. Nothing like this!)

Ghost Chef: That’s perfectly fine! No question is a dumb question in this kitchen!

Auburn: (That’s a relief...if only the other teachers were this nice.)

Auburn: (Vargas would have made me run like twenty laps for that.)

Ghost Chef: Now, after the tart crust is out of the oven, you’ll have to let it cool for a while. While it’s cooling, you should start preparing the filling. For now, I’ll let you start the clean-up process!

Auburn: Oh...right, preparing the filling will use even more dishes, and then the kitchen will become a mess in no time flat.

Ghost Chef: Bahaha! If that’s not the truest thing I’ve ever heard!

Auburn: Ah ha ha...

Ghost Chef: Well, get cleaning Auburn! I trust you’ll do a fine job?

Auburn: (Think of it like the times you helped out at the Mostro Lounge. Think of it like Azul is insisting he pay you even though you never asked him too.)

Auburn: (Man, I don’t even officially work there. Why did he pay me? I just wanted to help out...maybe I should actually get a job there.)

Auburn: (Actually, that’s a really good idea!? Why didn’t I think of that before?)

Auburn: (I don’t think Azul would consider it for a second though...I don’t have any identification or credentials.)

Auburn: (...Well, there’s no way to know for sure unless I ask, even though that would be one hell of a conversation.)

Auburn: Yeah, I’ve got it. Leave it to me.

Auburn: (I’ll make it cleaner than it was before I used it. I’ve always been thorough about these things.)

[acutiewithagun]

You said u wanted requests right? I love ur writing sm, could I request a platonic Mikey and reader piece with them baking together? I just really like your writing and how you portray the characters- It's fine if no, please tell me if I did this wrong this is the first time I've ever requested smth😭

(Baking... I had such a hard time choosing what they would make TTwTT. Also link to the original recipe I found. I don't know how good it actually is but it makes me want to bake it.)

Messes don't mean mistakes

You were sitting on your couch just reading when your phone signals a new message. You curiously left the fanfiction you had been reading and opened the awaiting text. There, being patient, was a paragraph easily summarized to being a baking invite. Mikey always knew how to make anything fun so you shot him an affirming text.

Storing your phone in your jacket pocket, you stood up and made your way to your front door. Once there you walked out, making sure to lock it behind you with the keys you snatched from the key holder. You let the key join your phone as you walked down the stairs, the elevator of your apartment building broke after Donnie had decided it was too slow and tried to rewire it despite the many protests.

You made it to the bottom and exhaled dramatically like you had run a mile. You rushed to the sidewalk to wave down a taxi. Once you caught the attention of one and slid in quickly, you almost immediately gave him the location that you desired to be. Which was a store about six feet from the abandoned subway station your turtle friend resided in. The cabby gave a nod and started driving you to your awaiting destination.

You waited in the long traffic and wondered if it would have just been better to walk. But then watched the passing pedestrians and decided it would have taken just as long. Once you reached the store you paid the cabby, stepping out of the taxi cab, then headed for your actual desired place. You made your way down the stairs and opened the door, only to be tackled in a hug by your favorite orange coded box turtle. "Hey Mikey, what exactly did you want to bake?"

His grin was so wide as he pulled away and grabbed your hand, pulling you to the kitchen. "Macarons, those fancy ones you see in bakeries. I found an a-maze-ing recipe online that I wanted to try out." You let out a sound of interest as the two of you entered the kitchen. The ingredients were all prepped and ready on the island counter as you walked over to it.

"So how are we doing this?" You walked over to the sink and started to wash your hands. "Sieve the icing sugar and ground almonds together in a large bowl then whisk together." He pointed to a bowl on the countertop. You turn the tap off and dry your hands as Mikey starts washing his hands. "Sieve?" He laughed and rubbed his hands in the flowing water. "It's a utensil used to strain the finer stuff away from the bigger stuff." You smile and pick up the sieve that was sitting on the countertop. Mikey dried off his hands quickly and had you hold the sieve as he poured the ingredients mentioned before in the bowl.

"Now we get to put the ingredients in the food processor. Then do that again, after that we get to repeat it twice." Mikey's grin was so bright as he started dumping the contents of the bowl into the food processor. You just watched with your own version of that adorable expression. You covered your ears as he turned the machine on and dropped your hands once it was done. You did make sure to wash your hands again before repeating the process two more times.

"So why did you invite me over?" He looked up at you from where he was reviewing the recipe again. "Oh, just missed you, teehee." He playfully stuck his tongue out the side of his mouth and hit his head with a fist. The action made you laugh as you started moving the next ingredients. Doing so you notice a small bottle of something you didn't recognize. You picked it up and showed it to Mikey. "Hey what's this?" You were about to open the lid when he snatched it out of your hand. "Just a bit of extra flavor for later."

You gave him an odd look and shrugged as he took the rest of the ingredients for the next part. "Ok, now we get to whip the egg whites and cream of tartar together. Then as we do that we add the salt and slowly add the sugar." You nod and help him with the process before moving onto the next part. "Now add vanilla and this gel food coloring. Then I'll finish whisking it." You do as instructed and he started whisking once again.

"So what are we gonna go after this fun little baking spree?" He smirked and continued whining. "Surprise, a fun one at that." You hummed as you thought about what it could be. "Are we gonna prank someone?" "Sounds fun, but no." He giggled as he placed the bowl down and moved onto the next step. "How about, spray painting the tunnels again?" He poured in some powdered sugar and almond flour and began mixing again. "Nope, guess again."

You bit the inside of your cheek as you pondered. "D.D.R?" Mikey blew a raspberry and shook his head. "Dee claimed it today, but that was one of my plans." You tilt your head slightly as he begins transferring the batter to a pan. "I'm out of guesses, need me to preheat the oven." He gave you a nod. "300, but wait a bit, these have to sit out for at most an hour." You looked curiously at the unfinished desert as he tapped the tray.

"What are you doing?" He looked at you with a grin. "Trying to remove any air bubbles." He paused and set a timer before turning back to you. "Hey, can you do me a favor really quick? Just while we wait for these to set and I make the filling." You curiously nodded and walked over to him. "What do you need?" Mikey smiled and pointed outside the kitchen. "Can you go get some blankets, pretty please?"

You smiled and left the kitchen in a hurry, mind running through the different reasons one would need a blanket. Your pace slowed as you neared the makeshift closet they kept extra blankets in. You opened the door and looked over the selections.

Making up your mind, you pulled a few blankets out and wrapped them together to make them easier to carry. You made your trek back to the kitchen and popped your head in. "Mikey, I got the blankets, where do you want them?" He was already working on the filling and looked up at you. "Living room, unless Dad is there. If he is then in my room." You nodded with a grin and walked over to the living room.

You craned your neck to look at the arm chair and noticed the rat man watching something. You blew a puff of air and turned around. You strolled to Mikey's car that was designated as his bedroom. Once entering you lazily dropped the blankets in a pile on the floor. A part of you wanted to explore the car simply because of basic curiosity. But you quickly brushed it off and made your way back to the kitchen.

"Mission accomplished, now what?" You leaned against the countertop as Mikey poured the filling in a plastic bag. "You wait, or start cleaning up and doing dishes." You nodded then started picking up the used measuring cups and other used dishes. You would have to do it eventually, might as well do it as you wait. Once Mikey was done with his task he helped you pile the dishes in the sink and run water over them.

You sectioned off after that, Mikey grabbed cleaning supplies and started cleaning the counters, and you were hand washing each dish then putting them on the drying rack.

"How's this one, a flower guy obsessed with plants?" Mikey nodded with a grin as he scrubbed the counters. "Ended up battling a plant we dared each other to smell, it was awful and we couldn't get the smell out for at least two weeks." You let out a puff of frustration as you place a now clean bowl on the drying rack. "Phooey, again? I really thought I had that one. Hmmm... Pumpkin!"

Mikey gave you a questioning look with a confused smile. "Pumpkin?" You nodded as you scrubbed another dish with the sponge. "Yeah, what about a pumpkin?" He gave a playful hum and flicked water your away, causing you to yelp in surprise and try to spray him back. "Yep, Donnie went on a wild tirade and we all spent the day chasing this giant pumpkin." You didn't remember when the game started, probably when you accidentally sent the whisk flying. Mikey caught it luckily but that led to questions about his many adventures.

He had preheated the oven then placed the cookie sheet on the middle rack a few minutes ago. So we were just waiting the few minutes left. "So what about... other ninjas?" He paused and nodded. "Where do you think we got Frankenfoot?" "Ah, makes sense." The timer went off and Mikey put on oven mitts before taking the cookie sheet out. "Now we get to wait ten minutes before we put them together."

You let out a hum as you take in the sweet smell of the pastries. "What about a sweets villain?" He shook his head with a grin. "Nope, but we have faced a crazy cook villain." You smile as you notice something out of the corner of your eye. "Leo, they aren't ready." The defeated red slider let out a pout and retreated his hand from the still cooling desert. Mikey laughed as his brother slunk away.

"Ouch, rejected." You run a bit of water from the faucet and flick it at the box turtle keeping you company. "No, protected." He smiled and looked at the cookie sheet. "We are mutants, we were made to be more resilient." You give him a deadpan expression. "Doesn't mean I won't still be concerned."

He smiled at you and poked one of the sweets. "I think we can assemble these now." You beam and grab the plastic tube with the filling inside. "I'll put the filling and you do the assembling." He agreed with a nod and you both got to work. After finishing up the macarons you put them on a plate then walked to Mikey's room.

Once inside he put the plate on the floor by the blankets. "I'll wrap you in blankets, just sit down." You smiled and shook your head as you plopped down on the floor. As soon as you hit the floor he started tightly wrapping blankets around you like a cocoon. "Hey, none for you?" He smiled and held up the last blanket and loosely draped it over his shoulders. "One for me, three for you." You scrunch up your nose as you laugh. "How am I supposed to eat our masterpieces?" He grinned mischievously and shrugged.

You cocked an eyebrow in curiosity and got an evil grin of your own. You leaned forward and snatched a macaron in your mouth. You giggled as you ate the dessert. "Now that's just cheating." Mikey didn't actually seem mad and chowed down on one of his own. "All is fair in love and war." You snatched another one and chewed it happily.

He pulled you closer to him and picked up the plate. "You gotta break free of your blanket prison if you want more." You playfully scowl at him and start to unravel the blankets as he eats another one.

Once you break free you quickly grab a macaron and pop it in your mouth. You both spend the rest of the day chilling in Mikey's subway car. Just drawing and coming up with stories.

[unfortunately-obsessed]

I'm obsessed with the logistics of the Spider-Society so here goes nothing

My hc is that Miguel dethroned his father. I don't think Tyler Stone would willingly give Alchemax to Miguel, and wouldn't put him on his will either.

But all that equipment we see in the movie is expensive, even for 2099 where they have an orbital lift and flying cars. The size of the building alone must be a fortune, after all, it is New York.

So, Miguel probably dethroned his father and got Alchemax, and that's where his money came from. SS building might been listened as a subsidiary of Alchemax with a bunch of classified projects no one (private sector or otherwise) dares to bat an eye.

Now the fun parts!

We have not only humans on the societies but also all kinds of sentients species. A T-Rex, a pork, cats, and even Lego! Do you think he recruited one by one? Oh, so many types of bathrooms...

Miguel had to design a DTD (that's what I call their "watches", Dimension Travel Device) for each of them, to deal with their specific molecular vibarations. Or maybe he lets Layla do it while he deals with other things? I can't take the image of my head of Lego Peter waiting for his DTD, watching a 3d printer work on it like the hand of the creator, and he's star-struck.

Having to make a full battery of exams when the physiology is different, to make sure the DTD works like it should but also that they are capable of taking the strain of travelling across the multiverse.

There's probably an infirmary somewhere that most resembles a hospital. Fully equipped. Employing nurses and physiotherapist and every type of doctor in every type of speciality.

A rotatory shift with Spider Doctors from different realities, and Layla tries not too overwork them but still all of them with a headache for having to deal with not only a bunch of injured self-sacrificing heroes but!! Different anatomies!!

Do you think non-human Spiders have to bring medical encyclopedias with them?

Spider Scientist (and medical doctors too) that are so glad and excited to finally have resources to use, but still need to go through Miguel and get their researches approved (it's hard for him to say a no tbh, he's a scientist too after all)

Physics and engineering and biologist and all kinds of scientist

Mechanic workshops. All kinds of different technologies interacting more and more. The SS equipment improving with each passing day because of Spiders from universes that are further in the timeline sharing their advanced tech.

It's so many departments to have. Logistics and TI and Security. Do you think it has a daycare? Teams that deal with holes in the multiverse (like that one in Mumbattam), the Strike Force itself, which probably is divided in squadrons with its leaders. And– so many people

Soooo much food. Spiders are constantly refueling. It's insane. And SS probably caters to all kind of tastes, nutrition necessities and allergies too. Spider Chef working overtime.

Probably has some temporary dorms. It has therapy offices!

Do you think Miguel would pay the workforce? He looks like he would want to pay, even those that are working part-time.

Probably gives them something valuable instead of actual currency, something they can exchange for currency and may be universal but not hard to find, like diamonds.

And Layla? She's a Supercomputer not only running SS but probably managing Alchemax too, not to say being Miguel's personal assistant and still giving support to any Spider that summons her (like Jess in that scene with Gwen)

Underground the building there are levels and levels, floor to celling with servers and servers and processors for her.

I don't think it would be all – in the tech sense – free 24/7 access, though. There's a limit there to prevent Heroes from spending too much time there, or from getting gadgets that they could bring to their home and accidentally (by butterfly effect or even directly) prevent a Canon event.

Even the infirmary probably only deals with heroes that got injured on missions, too. Again, to prevent a Canon event from not happening. It probably doesn't treat the common cold.

Oh, gosh- can you imagine if there's an epidemic of a powerful cold that knocks out them? Can you imagine the headache of coming up with a vaccine????

[lgcjaehwa]

jas can cook! ep 04: indonesian rendang curry chicken word count: 519

after returning from their jakarta stop during last year's asia tour, jaehwa vividly remembered craving spicy rendang curry chicken—a piping hot bowl of curry filled with generous chunks of chicken paired with rice. the aromatic smell and sweet-spicy flavor of the curry had lured her like a bee to a flower.

"welcome to another episode of 'jas can cook!' today, i'll be making a dish i've been craving since crystallis' asia tour last year. i've tried it in restaurants in korea, but i still prefer the one overseas. can you guess what it is? here's a hint: it's an indonesian dish. i'll give you a few seconds to guess!" with that, the screen cut off, and the camera panned over the ingredients neatly placed on the counter.

"if your guess is rendang curry chicken, ding dong deng! you're correct!" she hit a little xylophone that had been sitting in the corner of the studio. "my indonesian audience, did you guess it right? i've been wanting to eat rendang curry chicken, but i think the taste here is catered more for koreans. so, i've decided to try cooking the authentic indonesian version today."

to start, jaehwa scooped a few cups of rice and washed them before leaving them to cook in the rice cooker. "i know there are instant rendang sauces available, but i want to make it from scratch. my mom used to tell me that food tastes better if you pour your heart into it." as she spoke, she dumped all the vegetables required for the sauce into the food processor. halfway through, she added the unsweetened coconut milk followed by the spices.

the sauce was poured into a saucepan over medium-high heat. "next, you add in the chicken and star anise. you don't have to include the star anise if you don't like the taste of it." the chicken and star anise were mixed with the sauce, which was now starting to boil. after stirring occasionally, jaehwa reduced the heat and let the dish simmer. "important note: do not cover your saucepan if you want the sauce to reduce and thicken."

as she slowly drizzled the curry over the chicken, a faint spicy smell wafted to her nose, causing her to grin at the outcome so far. "i really wish you could smell what i'm smelling right now. it's so good, i cannot wait to try it already!" as the dish neared completion, jaehwa scooped a bowl of rice and set it aside before transferring the curry dish into a large bowl. fresh cilantro was sprinkled over it as garnish.

"the smell is already winning me over. ten out of ten for the smell! as for the taste..." she scooped a tiny bit of curry to taste. "oof—a little salty. maybe i put in too much soy sauce." brows furrowed, she stuck out her tongue at the saltiness and reached for the rice to mix the curry in. hopefully, the rice would reduce the saltiness. "oh? actually, it tastes better when mixed with rice. mmm~ not bad! i rate it a seven out of ten."

[asdfghjklartblog]

Iron Buttercups Part 1

A kidsopp story :)))

So I finished the first part of it! Yayyy!! Had to do a lot of revising and shit but I think this is pretty great! Hope you enjoy!

Synopsis: So in this story it's kinda like a meet cute, but the person who's in the meet cute looks like and acts like he hates your guts but he actually wants to be in them if you catch my drift. Anyways no smut, mostly cause I don't know how to write it. And I'm not sure how I'd do at writing it. Also love being mean to Zoro, he's so squinchy!!! The interactions between Sanji and Usopp can be read as whatever, I'm thinking more like they're best friends in this story but also who cares! Feel free to think it's a bit Sanji x Usopp too! Also a bit of Frobin in here, love that shit. Also maybe like a really small hint of Lawlu?

The idea of having four crews of the worst generation on one island was a terrible idea, however it couldn't be avoided. Sanji needed to restock on various foodstuffs, Franky also needed to dock to work on some things and see whether everything was in "tip top shape" as Franky said, and even Usopp had things he needed to do on the island. But the thought of seeing Law's crew sounded like a pain in the butt, while running into Hawkin's or Kid's crews sounded more like a fight waiting to happen.

"Usopp I don't like the sound of this either but the next island is about a week away, and unless you and Luffy can consistently catch a ton of fish. Luffy might start thinking about eating one of us."

"I would not!"

"Yes you would Luffy."

"Hihi! Yeah I would!"

"B-But, Nami... Please!!! I'd be fine if it was just Law's crew but-"

"Torao is here?!"

Nami turns to glare at Usopp. Shit. "That settles it! We're docking at the island then! That's alright, right Nami?"

If looks could kill Usopp would probably be dead. Nami gritted out in a sickly sweet tone " Yeah, sure Luffy! I'd love just love to dock at the same exact island that three other dangerous crews are on!"

Luffy stared at Nami with a blank face, not quite getting that she was being sarcastic.

"..... Great?" Said Luffy with a tone that implied he was not sure whether or not to answer, and if said answer was correct.

She sighs, she's been trying to help Luffy understand more social cues as well as when people are being nice versus when people are being rude. Although from the looks of it, the little lessons Nami’s been giving him hasn’t been working.

Nami turns to Usopp to Usopp and smacks the back of his head, then points at him and says. " This is your fault."

And truth be told, yeah it was his fault that Luffy heard about Law being on the island but it wasn’t his fault that they ran out of food. For the most part. Okay maybe he and Luffy one too many midnight snacks. Fine, more like ten too many but who's counting.

Usopp heard a chuckle coming from Robin lying in the lawn chair and reading.

"Well perhaps we'll run into a bit of fun? I heard that long ago this island used to take young prisoners of war to sacrifice to their god." Franky, who was listening in from earlier said. "Oh yeah, you told me about that! You think there might be a cult still following those old practices? You think they might even take my heart? Although I don’t exactly have a heart but I do have-“

Which leads to Franky to start rambling about the specifics of his heart/processor thing. While Robin looks to him with admiration and love. She interrupts him and counters with "You're not exactly a young prisoner of war, Flam. On top of that I do not like sharing what's mine."

Franky sputters in a way that describes the conflicting feelings that Robin's response evoked in him while Robin chuckles at his confusion.

"God they're so fucking sappy, it’s so cute and gross at the same time."

"You're so right Nams, look at them all happy and shit. Absolutely disgusting."

"Girl, don't agree with me. I hate you right now, now we literally have to dock on this shitty island because you couldn't keep your voice down."

"You KNOW he has selective hearing, he would've heard anyways!"

Zoro interjected with "You know he wouldn't have heard anything if you both had shUT THE FUCK UP! NOW-"

"GO BACK TO SLEEP MOSS HEAD!"

"YOU SHOULD GO WANDERING OFF INTO THE DAMN OCEAN AND DROWN ASSHOLE!"

As Zoro tried to reply he was immediately kicked out of the argument as he got hit by both Nami and Usopp.

"Anyways, both of you are on dish duty for the rest of the week."

"You can't do that!"

"I DIDNT DO SHIT!!" Nami goes to hit Zoro and Usopp on their heads.

"Too bad, now get ready to leave the ship. You're also both on grocery duty."

The two men groaned as Nami walked away in a huff. Zoro looked at Usopp in the eye and sent him a little glare.

"Don't look at me like that. Look I'll buy you some good sake alright?"

"... I want two bottles," Usopp sighs, signalling that the deal has been made. As he walks away Zoro proceeds to shout. "And it better be good or I'm gonna-!"

"Ughhhh. Yeah, yeah."

With a little smirk Zoro goes back to relaxing. Or maybe he was going to have a quick nap before going. Either way he was resting.

So Usopp decides to walk down to his workshop to double check his inventory and make a checklist of everything he needs to buy. After about an hour or two, right as he was about to go to Franky and ask if he also needed any parts, he hears a knock on his door. Usopp opens it to find Sanji.

Sanji leans against the doorway while lighting a cigarette and asks. "Dish duty and grocery duty huh?"

Usopp replies with a “Man, shut the hell up."as he rolls his eyes.

Which earned a chuckle from Sanji. "I'm gonna go wake the Marimo up now so you better hurry up."

"Wait, I gotta ask Franky a couple of things before I go."

Franky then pops his head from his workshop and proceeds to ask, "What do ya need to ask me?"

Usopp was surprised to see him there, not that it was unusual to see the in his own work room. Usopp just thought he was still with Robin or something. Probably just didn't hear Franky coming down because he was so focused on his supply check.

"Since I'm going shopping I wanted to know if ya wanted me to get you any parts before they sell out of what we need or something."

"Aw, thanks little bro! I need like about 20 of the 35-67-20 seals and 10 of those 45-80-12 seals and  about 100 or maybe even 200 nuts and screws of all the standard sizes and also three bouquets of Tulips, Rhododendrons, Zinnias, Plantain lilies and Day Lilies."

"Three?"

"Yeah, I looked for some flowers that were deer and people safe. So I could give one bouquet to Robin, another for Chopper and the last for Nami to brighten their rooms a little!"

"Aw that's sweet! But don't you think Chopper might eat those? Considering that those flowers are safe for deer? Although he isn't technically a deer but a reindeer."

Franky stood there in silence along with Usopp and Sanji. All of them ponder the question that was just asked. Usopp thinks this might be the longest time Franky has ever stayed quiet. He then starts to walk away as he said to Usopp "So the seals, nuts and screws! Get 'em for me will ya? Thanks little bro!" And proceeded to go to the deck, probably to question Chopper whether he likes to eat flowers or not. Sanji then mumbled something under his breath.

"What was that Sanji?"

"Nothing, just wondering what I should make for dinner, anyways now that that's over with come on."

They walked out over to the deck to find Zoro not there. Or in any of his usual sleeping spots.

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME!"

"God fucking dammit. He probably thought we left him or some shit."

"That damned moss head, it's like he literally has moss in his head instead of an actual human brain. I'd say I can't believe this, but this is pretty on par for that dumbass."

"Should we split up and look for him before we go shopping?"

"We can't, we need to buy the groceries before the other crews clear the market of everything. If I can't get everything I need, that bitch is gonna pay!"

"Okay so what's the plan? Just buy the groceries?"

"Usopp look, I'm gonna need you to buy everything on this list I made for you," Sanji gives him a list and rips another list in half and gives Usopp one half. "I'll handle half of the Marimo's list and you get that half, now I can count on you to buy all of them?"

Usopp smirked and replied confidently, "Nami ain't the only that can get a good bargain!"

"Hell yeah, Make me proud!

.

Usopp was arguing with a lady about the rice that Sanji needed him to buy. He heard from another vendor that he gets all his rice from here because her rice was high quality and delicious. The woman was tough, she looked pretty with her hair tied up and wrapped up in a bandana. However her stand looked a bit old and out of order. It could use some renovation to make sure that it would still draw in customers as well as keep to keep the stand itself safe and stable.

"My final offer! 10,000 berries for 40 kilograms of your finest rice!"

"Hah! The lowest I'll go is 16,000 for 30 kilos."

"What if I said please?"

"Hmm, 15,500 for 30."

"And if I said I'd help you repair your food stand?"

"Now you're talking! 12,500 for 30!"

"Deal! Pleasure doing business ma'am!"

"Like wise."

As Usopp shook her hand he felt proud of himself, he could understand Nami in a way. Getting a bargain did feel pretty good. But then he realised his mistake. He couldn't carry all this rice. Well technically he could, but that would take around two or three trips. Not only did that sound exhausting but it was starting to get dark and he still hasn't bought what Franky needs yet. He starts to think hard on what to do until he hears a loud yell from across the street.

He looks over and, oh. Oh no.

"Hey! You're the sniper for the Strawhats aren't ya?"

This was one of the last people he wanted to see, one of exact reasons he did not want to stop at this damn island.

This was NOT a good day for Usopp.

Eustass Kidd. A man said to not have any qualms with killing and pillaging, thought to even enjoy it with a bloody smile on his face. Said to enjoy his feasts filled with booze, food and bodies dead and alive. A man that Usopp, would obviously be scared of.

And although that may be true, it wasn't like a brave warrior of the sea to be afraid of some rival crew. No. A brave warrior would stand his ground, whether he was outnumbered or weaker than his opponent. So a brave warrior he will be. Until Kidd leaves at least.

"Where's that shitty little kid anyways?"

Usopp was still mentally preparing to talk to him! And he couldn't act like his usual self right now! He had to adopt someone else's personality or something!

"Hey! You ignoring me or something you brat?"

As of right now, he could only think of a response similar to whatever Usopp thinks Luffy would say. Which was probably the worst response he could use. But it was better than nothing, so before Kidd became even more irritated he used the "Luffy" response.

"W-Who're you calling a brat! I'm only four years younger than you!"

Shit. As soon as Usopp finished his sentence, there was some kind of glint in Kidd's eye. Which Usopp presumed it to be murderous. "Of all the people to copy, did I really have to pick Luffy?" He thought as Kidd started to walk over towards a overthinking Usopp.

"Oh really? So you're the same age as that stupid captain of yours?"

Fuck, screw this. He's just gonna act like himself. He backs away from Kidd trying to get more space between them, which was useless because Kidd followed his each step.

"If you hurt me, uh. Luffy will come after you!"

He's getting closer he's almost right in front Usopp.

"Who cares about your captain? He ain't here now. What I wanna know is, what you’re gonna do."

What?

He leans over and whispers into Usopp's ear, "What would you do to me, huh?"

He then pulled away and smirked at Usopp. Taking in his flushed face.

"So you want help?"

"W-Whuh? Um. I-"

Kidd sighed and said, "THE BAGS? Do you need help with the bags? You know, the shit you have in your hands?"

"Oh! Uh, no? I mean. No I-, I mean yes I. Haha sorry. Just. Gimme a moment."

Holy fuck? What the fuck was that? What the FUCK was that? That was so fucking hot and terrifying holy shit what.

"Could you, h-help me with the rice? That'd be really helpful and um."

Kidd looks at Usopp, and asks with an aggravated tone, "What?"

"My name is Usopp. Uh, yeah."

Kidd raised an eyebrow and looked him dead straight in the eye. He laughed, and replied with a smile "I know."

This man is going to be the death of him. He didn't think he’d die like this but it doesn’t really matter what kind of death he has does it?

"So where do you need to go?"

"Well I need to go to the parts shop and maybe the junkyard if we have time."

"Sick. So which way?"

"Well a vendor I talked to before said that the parts shop should be further down a couple of streets and that I'd need to take a right turn at the red bar then proceed down that street and then we'd find it."

"Well then hurry up, I ain't got all day you know."

The walk was quiet, and quickly turning into an anxiety churning venture. He didn't understand what was happening. Well, okay. Usopp understood that Kidd just, appeared out of seemingly nowhere and practically invited himself in on this little errand run the moment they met. It's just that, it was like the whole situation just, didn't click in his head for some reason? That must have been a joke or something right? Maybe this was a dream? Or he's actually on the ship! Unconscious from Nami's punch! Maybe-

“God you’re so fucking slow! Do you need me to carry you too?”

“Wh- No! I can walk by myself! I was just thinking a little too hard a-and besides, these bags are a bit heavy so of course I’d be a bit slow. If I didn’t have these bags I bet I’d have gotten to the junkyard already!”

Usopp thought to himself. “What am I saying!? He’s gonna break my body into pieces if I keep going with whatever the hell I’m talking about!”

However even as Usopp thought that, he couldn’t stop talking. “And on top of that, I’m only walking slow like this, cause so you can keep track of me!”

And right as Usopp thinks “STOP THAT! IF YOU KEEP GOING HE MIGHT-“

“You wanna put that to the test, runt?”

Fucking. Goddamit. Maybe, he could get out of this, Usopp thought. He can get out of this right? He’s Usopp! He can get out of anything!

“I’m not sure if you’d want that wouldn’t wanna show you up in front of-“ While Usopp tried to talk his way out Kidd had already decided that they were racing.

“Five.”

“Huh?”

“Four.”

“Wait, Kidd you don’t want to-“

“Three.”

“You really don’t want to do thi-“

“Two.”

“Kidd, I. I’m not ready! I gotta do all this stuff to-“

“One.”

In the last second Usopp resigned to his fate, as he thought well, he might as well die trying. So right as Kidd was about to say zero, Usopp instead yelled.

“ZERO!” And started booking it.

[victorluvsalice]

-->Where they found a bunch of people gathered outside their shop for some reason. O.o I was initially a bit confused -- but then remembered "oh, right, the Flea Market! Forgot that happened in this neighborhood!" Sure enough, most of the folks lingering on the sidewalk headed for the plaza to take their places as vendors or to take a look around at what was available, leaving Victor and Alice free to head inside and start making product --

But, well, Smiler was feeling a bit peckish, and one of their friends, Sai Bau, was in the crowd, so I had them catch up with him (well, maybe "him" -- Sai admitted to still figuring out their exact identity, but he/him pronouns seem okay for now), trade some frogs (I forget what Smiler gave him, but Sai gave them a spotted eggplant frog in return, which was nice), and eventually get a drink (a very, uh, enthusiastic drink -- as you can see, Smiler's animation glitched out a little there, leading them to shove a little more of Sai's arm than normal into their mouth! XD). Not what I expected them to be doing when they arrived at the store, but still -- always good to keep that Thirst quenched!

-->While that was going on, though, Victor and Alice were keeping busy -- Victor Copypastoed a few of Smiler's herbalism concoctions before heading into the basement to make some Emotional Stability potions, while Alice started out making a box of dried sage bottles before moving on to jarring up some mayo and custard before using the bulk processor to get some more sugar. Fun never stops down there! :p Smiler joined them and hopped on their apothecary bench to make more synthetic food tablets as Victor finished up the Emotional Stability brew -- he bottled that up, then moved onto another batch of Nimble Mind while Alice went back to making boxes of product -- specifically, apple jam, green beans, and green PEAS once I remembered "oh, wait, THAT'S the one I need more boxes of." ^^; All that processing was hungry work, though, so I had her take a quick break to sample some of her spare mushroom conserve -- she actually quite liked it, getting a nice Inspired moodlet with a terrible pun about how eating canned food made her think "yes I can!" XD Look, whatever helps you get through this push to fill the shelves, Alice.

[fanimesenseiwrites]

Things the MC would bring back to their demon bois from the mortal realm:

Lucifer:

MC goes to second hand stores and vintage shops always on the look out for vinyl records that they think Lucifer would like.

Most of the time they try and bring back stuff he'd actually like, such as Tchaikovsky or Vivaldi

Once, they brought back Stravinsky's Firebird Suite and Lucifer wouldn't stop kissing them (once they were in the privacy of his room of course)

Sometimes the MC will bring back more modern music just because it makes them think of him

"I dunno, I just listen to Hozier and think of you"

Lucifer doesn't like all the modern music they bring back but he appreciates the sentiment just the same

Then there's the gag gifts...

Any kind of music that has a reference to the devil or Satan or hell is fair game

These gifts usually elicit an eye roll from the eldest brother but he keeps them all the same

This is why Lucifer owns a copy of "The Devil Went Down To Georgia"

So when MC brings back a copy of Giuseppe Tartini's Violin Sonata in G minor, they're a little surprised at Lucifer's delighted reaction

"You know, I was the one who visited Tartini in his dreams."

MC's mind = blown.

"Also, this copy is cursed. I know you know how much I enjoy cursed vinyls."

"I- wait... What?!"

MC is very upset that they had a cursed vinyl in their possession this whole time

Mammon:

This boy loves stuff, and he loves MC, so he's gonna love any gift really

But MC knows he loves treasure and jewels and as much as they'd love to just bring him back nice watches and jewelery...

MONEY IS A THING, AND MC IS NOT MADE OF IT.

So MC settles for semi-precious stones instead

They always find fun and beautiful stones at museums and those metaphysical stores and they always pick out one that reminds them of Mammon

They're really nervous when they give him his first gift

"Hey, I got this for you and I know it's not fancy or expensive but I saw it and thought of you and I just wanted you to have it."

Mammon will love them until they die. He is really just so touched that MC thought of him. He'll try and play it cool though

He totally fails. MC won't tell him that though

MC brings him Lapis Lazuli and tells him it reminded them of his eyes and Mammon is now a puddle of lovesick goo on the floor

Mammon puts more shelves in his room dedicated to all the gifts MC gives him

One time MC brings him back some fool's gold in a teeny little jar on a chain, so that he can wear it

"Fool's gold? Why cuz I'm a fool?" Mammon asks with a roll of his eyes.

"What? No, cuz I'm a fool for you."

Mammon only love MC until they die? WRONG.

He's gonna love them forever now

He was gonna do that anyways

Leviathan:

C'mon, this boy is easy. Anime/manga stuff and TSL. Need I say more?

At first he'll be suspicious of MC wanting to give him gifts, but once they've convinced him that they're doing it out of the kindness of their heart he's really touched

The first thing the MC brings him is a pen with a little Ruri-Chan on the end of it

"I know it's not much, but I just happened to see it and I knew you'd like it"

Like it??????

HE LOVES IT! HE'S OVER THE GODDAMM MOON.

He's never seen anything like this in the Devildom and he doesn't think about the small stuff usually because he's too busy trying to get the big collectors edition items. So he actually really loves this.

MC continues to bring him cute small stuff like buttons and keychains and Levi loves them all.

His favorite item(s) that MC brought him is a pair of Lord of Shadows and Henry BFF enamel pins

He definitely tackle hugged MC when he got them

He gives the Lord of Shadows pin back to MC so they can each have one and show off their BFF status with them

Satan:

MC loves going to second-hand bookstores to shop for Satan.

Satan also appreciates new books, but there's something special about how his face lights up when he finds something old or rare. Anything with a little bit of history to it.

Of course, finding rare books for not a lot of money is a rare event in itself

So a safe bet is to bring Satan non-fiction, the boy loves to learn

But he really loves it when MC puts thought into finding fiction books that he would like

"I just really feel like you'd like Dean Koontz so I brought you one of my favorites by him."

Satan loves those gifts the most because he can talk to MC about the books afterwards

Satan's absolute favourite gift is a leather bound copy of Arabian Nights though

"I was thinking we could read this one together"

"Like you read it to me and pretend to be Scheherazade?" Satan suggests.

MC is flustered at the connotation of the suggestion but agrees anyways

The time they spend together reading that story will forever be one of Satan's favorite memories

Asmodeus:

He's a little harder to shop for than the MC had originally imagined

They tried bringing him make-up and skin care, which Asmo always graciously accepted, but he never seemed super excited about the gifts

But what else is to be expected from the guy who already uses only the best products?

MC suddenly gets an idea when they send Asmo a selfie of them at the park

- OMG! You're so cute! And the background is pretty too!-

MC starts dressing up and going to nice and beautiful places just with the intention of taking pictures

Botanical Gardens, museums, downtown skylines, anything that would make for a good picture

MC goes full on aesthetic art hoe just for Asmo

Only the best pictures get sent to Asmo

Asmo is LIVING for the looks their MC is serving up

- You are absolutely STUNNING! I'm in awe at these AMAZING pictures-

MC makes a scrapbook of the best pictures to give to Asmo the next time they see him

Asmo loves it and keeps it on display in his room always

Also, Asmo definitely makes MC their personal photographer after seeing the wonderful shots they took

Beelzebub:

Obviously, the boy loves food. He's always down to try new snacks from the mortal realm.

But MC wonders if there's something better that they could bring him

One day MC is at GNC for supplements for themself when they notice the workout supplements and get an idea

They grab some fun flavored protein powder and some BCAAs and a really nice shaker bottle just for Beel

Beel is actually really excited to get these gifts!

The Devildom doesn't have fun flavors of protein powder and the shaker bottle is such a great idea!

MC always brings new flavors of protein back for Beel, doing their best to find the weirdest flavors for him to try

Beel's favorite is definitely Birthday Cake.

MC starts bringing him new stuff to try too, protein bars, recovery supplements, collagen, and superfoods shakes

Beel tries everything and tells MC what their favorites are

"I love the BCAAs, I just wish the Devildom had them..." *sad Beel noises*

MC may or may not talk to Diavolo about researching BCAAs and getting them produced and sold in the Devildom

The supplements MC brings actually help Beel with his workouts and to control his hunger (a little)

Beel actually gets hotter??? Who knew that was possible???

MC definitely takes advantage of Beel's new 8-pack 😏😏😏

Belphegor:

What do you get the boy who only wants to sleep?

MC has gotten him stuffed animals and blankets and even a couple of nice pillows, but nothing seems to excite him

... but maybe that's just his personality??

It's not until MC accidentally leaves a sweater in the Devildom, that they figure it out

- You left your sweater down here- Belphie texts MC.

- Oh no, I'll just get when I come to visit y'all again-

- That's fine. I like having something that smells like you-

And the light bulb went off in MC's head.

Every time MC goes to visit they leave a shirt or sweater behind for Belphie, so that he can have something that smells like them.

Belphie loves how MC smells, its like a sweet dream all the time. It helps him sleep better when they're gone.

Belphie starts to complain when MC is gone longer than the item they left smells like them

(Which is every time)

So MC will start leaving Belphie more than one item, packing them in airtight bags so he can use them one after another until they return

Belphie can and will fight anyone who tries to take MC's clothing

"Mammon, you have two seconds to put that sweater back or I will kill you."

And Lucifer probably won't stop him

Diavolo:

He's honestly the easiest to please.

He's so fascinated with any thing that humans do that he'll enjoy any gift from the human world.

MC's first gift to him is a rubber duck.

"The duck is wearing a crown so it made me think of you and I just thought it was cute."

"I love it! What's its purpose?"

"Uh... to float around in the bathtub with you and look cute?"

"Isn't that what you're for?"

Diavolo loves the rubber duck so much it gets his own silk pillow to rest on when it's not taking a bath with Diavolo.

MC brings him cute pens, and keychains sometimes bottles of wine if the bottle is cute.

"The bottle is shaped like a cat! Isn't that delightful?!"

MC's proudest moment was when they found a full and intact tea set at the thrift store

Diavolo immediately fell in love with it.

He insists on only using that set when having tea with MC

But his favorite gift will always be the rubber duck.

Barbatos:

He'll insist that he doesn't need any gifts but that won't stop the MC.

MC is with him in the kitchen in the Demon Lord's Palace when they get an idea.

KITCHEN TOYS.

Barbatos works so hard, he deserves some things to make his life easier and liven up the bland kitchen

MC's first gift is a vegetable spiralizer.

"You use it to turn zucchini and squash and the like into noodles so that you can do fun stuff with vegetables!"

Barbatos accepts it graciously, but he'll probably never use it.

MC brings him spices from the mortal realm and Barbatos actually really loves those.

When MC brings him a food processor, he offers to cook for them right then and there

Despite all the weird gadgets MC ends up bringing him, and there are plenty out there, Barbatos's favorite is a ladle that looks like a stegosaurus.

It's far more whimsical than anything he would've ever picked out, and he'll never use it, but only because he's afraid of ruining it, not because he doesn't love it.

At some point, Barbatos does ask MC to stop bringing him kitchen gadgets

"Why? Do you not like them?" MC asks with a pout.

"I appreciate all of them, but I have everything I need when you're in the kitchen with me."

If MC wasn't already in love with him they are now

Smooth bastard just doesn't want anymore shit in his kitchen

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

The last thing we need is for Y/N to go feral- XD Anyway, can I ask for some headcanons where Malleus, Rook, Vil, Silver, and Trey have to take care of their fem s/o after she turns into an actual cat please (lab accident, or spell gone wrong)? Thank you!

You can read S/O goes feral/acts like a wild animal headcanons here!

Curiouser and Curiouser...

... Honestly, with how powerful of a magician Malleus is, he could restore you to your usual human form right away The only reason he doesn’t is because you tell him you want to see what life is like as a cat. Your wish surprises him, but he respects your desire and allows you to do as you please until you are ready to return. That whimsy of yours never ceases to amuse him.

Night time strolls are a staple! You faithfully follow Malleus as he traverses the camps in the evenings, sometimes scampering ahead to lead the way through the darkness. Your eager attitude never fails to draw a chuckle from him as he allows his partner to guide him, just as much as he guides you.

Malleus likes to keep you resting in his lap during meetings (well, the ones they remember to invite him to). Because of his overwhelming aura, he has scared off a few mob students that walked in and saw him menacingly stroking a cat in his lap while listening in on a briefing. Malleus unintentionally gives off the vibes of a James Bond villain--

For your food, Malleus personally roasts your meat for you in his magical green flames. It’s a little act of love meant to add a bit of flare and pizzazz to your meals!

There’s a game you like playing together, similar to how you’d play with a cat and a laser pointer pen back home. In a dimly lit location, Malleus will summon his little green fairy lights, and it’s your job to try and catch them all as fast as you can!

Rook decides to let you run loose!! Night Raven College is your new hunting grounds—and your playground—to enjoy! He’ll follow you close behind, just to keep a watchful eye as you explore in your new body.

You bet he brings his camera with him to tail you. Rook can’t miss out on this rare opportunity to catch come pictures of you chasing butterflies and pawing at his pant leg to get his attention. Moments like these need to be captured on film so you can one day look back on this time and reminisce!

Oh, Rook adores how your fur tousles and fluffs up when you run about! He loves ruffling your fur up himself just as much, and makes sure to get in a good head pat, kiss, or tickle in whenever he can~

This man is savage. He straight up harpoons fish or shoots wild field mice and, on one knee, offers them to you as fresh food or “tokens of his undying affection”.

No one messes with you while you’re out exploring (mostly because Rook sneaks up behind them with a murderous smile to prevent them from raining on your parade). It’s a taste of freedom you haven’t had in a while, and you get to enjoy every second of it thanks to your guardian huntsman watching you from both near and afar.

Vil’s determined to safeguard you and not let you out of his sight until you return to normal. In fact, he picks out a hand bag that’s just the right size for you to fit in, and brings you with him to class and to his various acting and modeling gigs!

Nothing but the best for you, no matter what your form. Vil ensures that the production assistants on set fetch you healthy but nutritious and high quality meals, and crisp, clean water to drink.

He prepares a special litter box for you that is styled like a canopy bed with curtains. Vil thinks it is unseemly to “use the facilities” so openly, so he specifically chose a design that comes with opaque curtains. That way, you can step in and use the litter box discreetly.

He pampers you from head to claw! Just because you’re a cat doesn’t mean his darling shouldn’t look their best. Vil will wash you, dry you off, brush your fur, and file your nails to perfection. You’ll look like you just came off the cat walk when he’s done with you!

After a long, hard day, Vil embraces you and mutters his grievances into your fur. He finds comfort in your soft, small form, finding that you’re so much more well-mannered and behaved than Leona “brutish wild cats”.

Silver likes keeping you close to him at all times--specifically, close to his chest. He likes the feeling of having something small, fuzzy, and warm near and dear to his heart... but he has to be careful when he’s holding you, because he tends to fall asleep when he gets that comfortable!

He doesn’t trust anything that Lilia whips up for you. Silver marches straight off to the Mystery Shop to purchase some premium canned tuna for you because he knows it’s safe from being tainted by his dad.

He makes sure you get your exercise in by playing with you! That could mean joining him for a jog, or batting a teaser as Silver swings it around. Sometimes you get so into it that you completely miss the toy and pounce on him instead, and you both end up tumbling into the grass, laughing.

Not all days are high energy, though. Silver has times when he just wants to be lazy and relax with you. He’ll scout out a shaded area underneath a tree with a perfect sun spot not too far off for you--and there you’ll be parked for the rest of the afternoon, soaking up the mild weather.

Silver loves soft and fluffy things, so he’s always patting or squishing you in some way or another. He especially likes to nuzzle his face against yours and squeeze your little jelly bean paws... It’s so therapeutic!

First thing’s first, Trey’s clearing the kitchen and the immediate vicinity of foods that cats can’t eat. That means grapes, chocolates, onions, garlic... He doesn’t want you getting sick or hurt!

Trey’s not as good at cooking as he is at baking—but he knows enough to throw together some raw fish and spices to make a special tuna tartare (garnished with a basil leaf). He uses his handy-dandy food processor for the job while you sit at his side, waiting for the tuna to finish churning. It’s adorable watching your ears and nose twitch in anticipation!

After you’re done eating, Trey helps you brush and floss your teeth. He’s not exactly sure if cats need to take care of their dental hygiene to the same extent as humans, but it’s better safe than sorry!

When you’re indoors, Trey follows you around with a lint roller or a vacuum cleaner to clean up any stray cat hairs. He also keeps you away from curtains and furniture--anything that could be damaged by your claws! Riddle would throw a fit if you damaged anything!

Trey fusses over you as his dorm members attempt to get a head pat, cuddle, or a selfie in with your cute kitty self! He claims it’s because they’re causing you trouble, and while that’s true, he’s not being entirely truthful, either. He’s actually a little jealous that he has to share you, too!

[ochazuku]

You're fried (*fired)

Denki’s brain is already fried after a long day.

All he wants is some fried chicken, and not to become twice-fried by the guy working at the fast food restaurant.

(click here to read on ao3)

The guy in front of Kyouka isn’t responding.

To be slightly more precise, he’s lagging.

”Oi, can you move it!” screams the staff member handling the queue - the one with the explosive hair and the explosive voice. “The snake behind you is growing.”

Kyouka looks behind her. He’s right - the queue is getting longer by the second, impatient feet tapping, impatient stomachs growling.

”Do you need help?” Kyouka tries. “I can help you if you’re not familiar with the ordering machine.”

The guy doesn’t seem to hear her. Seems like his processor really has crashed.

He stays like this for the next two minutes, unmoving, silly expression on face and silly finger in air. Kyouka really wants to laugh, but the tension in the air is growing and -

“FUCK OFF ALREADY!!!” Explosive Store Worker loses it, exploding at Lagging Brain-Fried Guy.

Commotion erupts as the poor silly guy falls onto the cold hard ground; as he does, he seems to regain his senses somewhat, wincing in pain. Another staff member - the white-haired one that was multitasking really hard (handling both the fire for frying chicken and the ice for soft drinks at the same time), comes to control his co-worker.

Poor Silly Guy runs away from the scene, looking traumatised. Kyouka hurries up with her order at the self-serving kiosk and quickly gets out of the restaurant, too.

=============================================

It takes Kyouka five minutes to find him, sitting sadly on a bench at the park beside the mall.

”Are you alright?” Kyouka tries to speak in her most compassionate voice as she plops herself down on the empty seating space beside him. There’s a bit of extra space in between them, so there she places the box of chicken and fries, plus two paper cups filled with Cool-Aid and ice, fitting the space perfectly.

Poor Guy (now no longer silly) stares at her, looking confused and a little sad. “Huh?” is all he says, eloquently.

”I was the person right behind you in the queue. That worker guy shouldn’t have done that to you, no matter how slow you were.” Kyouka picks up a French fry, handing it to him. “No worries, he's been fired already.”

A slight pause, a series of three confused blinks, a chewing of French fry later, another “Huh?” is all that comes out of his mouth.

“Yeah, in fact he was fired twice. First by his co-worker, the cool multitasking fire dude, who had to restrain him with actual fire. Then by his manager, who fired him from the job.” Kyouka hands him the box. “Here. You can have the whole box.”

”Oh,” Poor Guy responds quietly as he chews on some fries, seeming to get it by now. “Thank you.” A slight pause. “Wait, why am I eating your food?! And who are you?!”

(Because first I felt extremely bad for you and wanted to lend you a listening ear, and then I realised how extremely cute you are when you are being silly, and now I realise how extremely cute you are even when you’re not being silly, is what Kyouka wants to say, but -)

”Because I thought maybe you’d like to enjoy some fried chicken and fries, after a long and tiring day like this.” Kyouka smiles. “And I am your new friend, your new fried chicken buddy.”

[peanutpinet]

Lucas (mafia leader) x Reader (female)

A/N: I had this thought for days now and was like, ya know, just let it out. This is my first NCT (?) WayV (?) fanfic? Scenario? Yea XD For those who have read my past fanfics/scenarios, you know how horrible I am in explaining XD but yea, essentially I just imagine that you, the reader are a uni student whilst Lucas is part of the NCT mafia, "leader" of the WayV unit (I know Kun is technically the leader, but just for the sake of the story), okie, leggo

Sighing in defeat, you gathered all your books, stationery and some clothing before sneakily going out of your dorm and to your boyfriend's apartment since he gave you the spare key, saying that it was for emergencies or whenever you wanted to come over.

After texting Lucas that you were heading to his apartment, you went to grab a cab and head there. Truth be told, you never really went there and only got the address from Lucas. Which is why upon arriving, your jaw nearly dropped when you saw his apartment; even making sure whether the address Lucas gave last time was the exact one and making a mental note to yourself to look up things beforehand.

Upon arriving, you felt like you just came from the countryside to the big city. You went to the front desk and inform them who were you looking for, handing in your ID card and was immediately directed to the elevator, one of the securities pressing the highest floor of the elevator and left you in the elevator on your own.

Just when you thought that it couldn't get any fancier, the minute you stepped out of the elevator, you were amazed at the decor and the fact that there was only one door made it even grander. Taking out the key Lucas gave you, you were actually hoping that it wasn't the correct one and Lucas just sent you the wrong address but as it turns out, the key fits and you took a deep breath, walking into the room.

But on Lucas' side, he actually didn't receive your text message. So, the second he heard someone coming into his suite, he was already reaching for his gun because he wasn't really expecting anyone to come. But as soon as he heard your signature nervous voice, he felt relieved but worried at the same time. Did something happen to you?

"Lucas? Ar-are you in here? The people at the front desk just directed me here. I uh sent you a text" you called out

"I'm here sweetheart. Now, what brings you here at this late hour? Is there anyone I should be concern with?" Lucas stated, coming out of his bedroom

"Huh? Wow. I mean, no. Sorry, it's my first time here. I uh, I was just wondering if I could stay for the night. The dorm was so loud that I couldn't study nor sleep" you admitted, trying to avoid eye contact with Lucas, thinking that it was a lame excuse to come over

"Of course you can. I gave you the spare key for a reason, didn't I? Uh, sorry about the mess and all. I didn't expect you to come. I didn't receive any messages. C'mere sweetheart" Lucas mentioned, giving a hand motion for you to go to him

"Really?! I could've sworn I...(looks at your phone) I forgot to click the send button" you sighed, hitting your head as you went over to Lucas

"Hey, hey. Don't do that. You'll hurt your brain even more. No harm sweetheart. My place is yours. Come. I'll order some McDonalds as well if you'd like" Lucas cooed, bringing you into his office

"Damn. Two desktops?! Bro and this processor is the latest one?!" you commented, placing your bag down and immediately inspecting his desk

"Sometimes I play some games with the guys. Feel free to use it if you'd like. Lemon tea or coke?" Lucas asked, scrolling through his phone

"Lemon tea, no ice. It's worth the money better. Are you sure I can study here? Am I not disturbing you?" you questioned, sitting on the chair

"Not at all, sweetheart. It's almost 10pm. I'm done with work. You're free to use my computer. I've ordered your favourites already. I'm going to go for a shower for a bit. Feel free to turn on some music as well, alright? And please don't study for too long. I worry you'll hurt that gorgeous head of yours" Lucas chuckled, kissing your forehead before leaving you in his study room

After settling, putting on some music with your account (which was already in Lucas' Spotify), you grabbed your books and stationery then started to study for your finals. In the midst of it, you heard Lucas coming in with McDonalds; wearing a plain T-shirt and sweats.

Because there was only one chair in his office, with your consent, Lucas placed you on his lap as he was feeding you McDonalds whilst scrolling through his phone, occasionally leaning his head on your back as he does so.

After finishing the food, Lucas was about to get up and cleaned up so you could study a bit better since he knew you didn't like a messy space but when he felt your head slightly leaning backwards, he questioned whether you were already sleepy or not.

"What's wrong love? Tired?" Lucas murmured as he placed his chin on your neck, wrapping his long arms around your waist

"Huh? Oh? Sorry. I didn't realise I was leaning back" you yawned, scrubbing your eyes but Lucas stopped the motion

"Don't. Your eyes will get irritated. I think it's about time you sleep, hmm?" Lucas commented, tucking a hair behind your ear as he kissed the side of your cheek

"Hmm. I guess so" you sighed, leaning onto Lucas's chest

"Alright princess, let me just shut everything off. Kay, let's go to bed" Lucas chuckled, carrying your small figure in his arms and tucking you into his bed before going to the other side of the bed

The next morning, you were woken up by the sound of your phone's alarm but just stayed in bed whilst scrolling through your phone until you realised that you had exams that starts in 45 minutes. Immediately, you got up and went back to the study room to grab your clothes, without even calling out to Lucas and head to the bathroom to get ready.

After getting ready, you were so ready to rush out the door and call a cab until Lucas finally called out to you. Once you told him that your exam was starting in literally 15 minutes, he just chuckled and told you that he'll drive you there; which was a first since all this time, you guys just have dates near your campus since your dorm had strict rules and Lucas would just walk you there (A/N: how you guys met is a story for next time, lol).

After packing some food for you, Lucas grabbed his car keys in one hand and your hand in the other, making your way down to the parking lot where your jaw also almost dropped again since the car Lucas owned is probably enough to pay your whole entire undergraduate life.

Whilst in the car, Lucas told you to eat so you wouldn't be hungry during the exam. He also mentioned that he'll come to pick you up to celebrate finishing your finals since he knew that you've been stressing over this last final for weeks; saying that he'll treat you out.

Once you've arrived, Lucas pulled you to give a slight peck on your forehead, encouraging you to do well in your finals and that he'll see you right after you're done. You smiled and thank him. Getting out of the car, you saw nearly the whole campus that was by the front gate staring at you; even your friends were stunned before rushing to you, managing to get a glimpse at Lucas who just smiled before leaving.

"Gurl!! I knew your boyfriend was hot, but well off? You definitely hit the jackpot!!" one of your friends blurted

"Sis!! Can we save the conversation for later? I need to get this exam over with first" you bargained

"Okay, okay, good luck with your exams!! I'll see you later!!" your friend exclaimed as you went to your exam hall

Thankfully, the exam wasn't as hard as you'd thought. You didn't know if it's because Lucas actually helped you study since he actually knew the subject or something else but you were glad to finally be done with it. After the exam, you got a text from Lucas, saying that he'll be running a bit late which you didn't mind. Your friend, who was also done with her exam, came to your exam hall and didn't spare a second before plastering with all sorts of questions.

Asking you where you've been the night before since you weren't at your dorm; and when you told her you were at Lucas' place, she squealed, asking if you guys did anything spicy which you immediately cut her off, saying that you just went there to study because the rooms near yours were getting too loud and rowdy.

You also explained how kind and caring Lucas was; despite the amount of work he had to deal with, he was still soft when it came to you. Ordering your favourites from McDonalds, letting you just barged into his apartment whenever and even using whatever he had; hearing this, all your friend can do was just squeal, saying that Lucas was the perfect boyfriend.

And right on cue, Lucas texted you saying that he's almost at the front gate. Your friend saw your smile and teased the heck out of you before letting you off just because she supported your relationship; knowing that you had a rough past and it was nice to finally see you happy with someone; someone that genuinely cares about you.

But of course, life ain't that easy. Because just as you were skidding along the halls to the front gate, you accidentally bumped into someone and dropped your phone. You immediately apologised about to get your phone when the person you bumped into stepped on your phone. Looking up, you met with the campus' miss popular with her boyfriend.

"Can you please let go. I really have to go now" you sighed, looking up

"Can't your boyfriend get you another one? Oh wait, is he the one that you're meeting? Honestly, I dunno what he sees in you. Oh wait, I think I do. He's probably just in it to play around or probably did it because of a bet" the girl scoffed but you were just not having it and shoved her feet off, nearly falling if it weren't for her boyfriend being there

After getting your phone, you were about to make a run for it before she grabbed your hair, pulling you back and making you fall; calling you names and all. When you got back to your feet again, she nearly slapped you when you got ahold of her hand about to push her back when her boyfriend came and took your hand, twisting it behind your back, allowing an opening for her to get a good punch out of you.

It felt like forever since you were trapped between the two "bullies" of your campus and for Lucas, it meant something was wrong. It's been almost 30 minutes since he arrived and called you but there was no answer at all. Frustrated, he called Winwin to track your phone as he went in to find you; thinking that you were held captive by one of NCT's enemy.

When he did see you, he felt a slight relief that it wasn't one of NCT's enemy but he was still very much pissed at the sight. When the girl was about to hit you for like the 15th time, Lucas grabbed ahold of her arm, throwing her to the floor before looking at her boyfriend who turns out to be one of the bartenders in one of NCT's bars.

"B-boss..." the man stammered, letting go of your hand as you almost dropped if it weren't for Lucas catching you

"You better come to work tonight. We'll have a lil discussion about respect? Hmm? Make sure everyone comes. Or I'll just have to report Taeyong about this" Lucas growled, making the man cowered in fear

"N-no sir. Everyone will come tonight" the man stuttered as Lucas stood up, holding your figure firmly in his arms

"Good. Wouldn't want to make a big deal out of this hmm? Oh, and do bring your girlfriend while I take mine to treat the wounds you both caused" Lucas scoffed, bringing you out of the campus

Once you've reached his car, he gently placed you and put your seatbelt on before going to the driver's seat. Once he was in, he called Kun, telling him what happened and that he's planning to have a meeting later tonight in the bar. After the call, Lucas took your hand in his, stroking your knuckles as he drove back to his apartment.

Upon arriving, he helped you get out of the car and into his apartment. Inside, he brought you to his room before going to the bathroom and grabbing some medicine for your bruised face and cut on the lips. Lucas treated all your wounds as gently as possible, worrying that he might accidentally hurt you, treating you as if you're as fragile as an egg.

After he was done, he threw all the cotton buds and ordered some food for the both of you; knowing that you will tell him whenever you're ready. He put his hoodie onto you before bringing you to the living room to cuddle and just watch the whole day. Occasionally, food will come and it was all from your favourite restaurants.

After the next 5th Disney movie ended, you told Lucas that you wanted to take a shower and he told you that you can borrow any of his clothes. He even said that he'll run you a bath but you told him that you were just going to take a light shower which Lucas didn't mind. Whilst you were showering, Lucas prepared a T-shirt and shorts along with the hoodie you were just wearing.

After your shower and putting on the clothes Lucas prepared, Lucas came and redid the medicine on your wounds before going back to watching some heart-warming movies on the bed. Feeling better, you decided to tell Lucas what happened and whilst it seemed that he was calm, his mind was off wondering the endless possibilities of teaching the two that harm you; whether it'd be physically or mentally.

Either way, Lucas listened to all your rambles, wrapping his arm around your shoulder, leaning you onto his chest, giving kisses on your forehead, cheeks and occasionally your neck, chuckling when he saw you flustered; basically making you 10x better, treating you like a queen up until you fell asleep.

When you did fall asleep, he gently tucked you into bed, kissing your forehead, smiling at your sleeping figure before leaving the room to the bar where he was more than ready to make the two-person harmed you suffer; not forgetting to ask Hendery and Yangyang to come over to watch over you.

"Sleep tight sweetheart. I'll be back before you know it, alright? No one treats my queen like trash and gets away with it" Lucas mumbled, kissing your forehead as he left as quietly as possible

and let's just say that everyone in the bar that night experienced a side of Lucas that no one would like to see or hear ever again.

"Try and lay a finger on her again, I won't be so nice next time" Lucas scoffed, seeing all the staff looked down, especially the two-person who hurt you

A/N: I hope that this was alright but yea, this fanfic has been stuck in my head for days

[twisted-wonderland-shenanigans]

Deity!AU: Halloween Beginnings

AUTHOR NOTE: Anon asks are now active! For some reason I wasn't able to activate it from mobile and didn't realize it until now, so if you had a question but were too shy to do so, it should be working now!

Hello everyone~!

Well, Halloween has since come and gone, which means that it’s Jack’s turn to bring a winter wonderland to the world so it can rest. But as I’ve said in the last post, Lilia had some rather interesting things to tell me about Halloween when I was explaining the holiday to Grim. Turns out it has a much deeper history than I realized…although it ended up being a lot of information to listen to, so it took me quite a while to condense it into this short version.

“His stories wouldn’t end! I couldn’t even fall asleep without him pranking me awake!”

Oh come on, Grim, I know you enjoyed some of those stories too.

“Hnn…yeah, I guess. I still say it was more fun getting all that candy. Look at this haul I got from just one human town! Nyahaha~! A worthy tribute for their future god!”

[Fufufu~! Getting a little ahead of yourself, aren’t you, little one?]

“Fygnaa!? You again! Stop doing that!!”

Hi, Lilia! Glad you could make it.

[Of course. I wouldn’t miss it for the world!]

Awesome, I…wait a minute. You didn’t rearrange my cabinets again, did you?

[No, not this time, I’m afraid. Do you wish me to?]

Knowing you, you’ll probably end up doing it anyway. Just be careful where you stick the sharp utensils in this time, please. My ears are still ringing from the last time…

[Ah yes, that was quite endearing seeing you try to bandage Sebek’s hand even when it was unnecessary.]

“Are you kidding? His yell still caused a lightning strike and thunder loud enough to make us deaf!”

…let’s change the subject, we’re getting way off topic here.

[Ah yes, though I’m sure the creator would’ve loved to continue this little conversation.]

Huh? But…I am the creator.

[Oh right, you are too.]

…too?

[Oh look, here’s your little transcription! Let’s read it, shall we?]

Lilia, wait a--! Ugh, fine. I’ll go get us some snacks and drinks then.

“Bring me tuna!”

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Many years ago—before the Great Darkness drove the gods into hiding—humans had grown wary and fearful of the world around them as the harvesting season ended, winter lurking just around the corner. With the uncertainty of whether or not they would survive the harsh winter months, the mortals began to seek guidance and wisdom from the gods in the hopes of earning their mercy. My heart always ached for the plight of those poor little children shivering under their blankets during the colder times. Sometimes I would sneak in and leave them warmer clothes and sheets, though when I would prepare a feast for them and their family none of them would touch the food. So disappointing…

It was around this time that many believed that the barrier between the land of the living and the dead became blurred, the ghosts of the deceased returning to the earth to seek hospitality from family. Or perhaps they wished to feast on the flesh of the living? Just kidding~!..or am I? Fufufu~! While many cowered away in their homes from these ghostly entities, some brave souls believed they could commune with the spirits to attain premonitions of the future…or so they were told. In actuality, the mortals were speaking to Ortho, the God of Souls, who used his processor to calculate probabilities with such speed and accuracy that they could only assume that he could see the future. Ah yes, I remember this. If I recall correctly, I may have let it slip that the “Souls” could predict possible outcomes. Apparently they took it to heart, and for the next few centuries little Ortho would answer their call. Such an entertaining sight to see their faces when they try to make sense of his technical speak!

Compared to today’s tradition of dressing up in costumes and going door to door for treats, masks and animal skins would be worn by those venturing outside the safety of their homes. The reason for this was so they wouldn’t be recognized and could blend in as one of these mischievous spirits. It was quite enjoyable having some of the mortals join me in my rounds—I simply didn’t have the heart to tell them that I could see right through their little disguises. How could I? To encourage the spirits and demons to not enter their homes, bowls of food and drink would be left outside to appease them. Those who did not would soon find themselves the target of mischief and trickery, though whether this was the work of spirits, mortals, or the God of Mischief himself is unclear. I never said I didn’t have some part in that. In fact, it was the most fun the little ones and I have had! Oh you should have seen them all dressed up in their little costumes, helping me prank the adults—they even coined the most adorable phrase “Trick-or-Treat” from me, it was so adorable~!

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

“Eh? Hey, wait a minute! Did you just write in this thing?”

[Why, yes I did. It seemed a little short, and I remembered she’d mentioned that Cater would be providing commentary on her posts. I wanted to try it out for myself, and it was rather enjoyable! Certainly made it entertaining while we wait for the show.]

“Wait, what show?”

LILIA!!!! Why is there a staircase inside the fridge?!

[Ah, she found my little surprise sooner than I expected. Apologies, dear readers, I must take my leave. Before I do though, here is a small list of things little Faun couldn’t add in well. Until next time~!]

----------------

Fun Facts:

When it comes to the story “Sleepy Hollow”, it’s quite surprising to learn that this was actually inspired by Idia, who Lilia had managed to convince to attend one such Halloween event and dress in costume. While he had dressed as a knight from a film well known amongst the deities as “Pumpkin Hollow”, it’s no surprise that mortals misinterpreted the costume as a spirit and create a whole new legend to the story—much to the chagrin of the God of Death. He was happy to show the original film in it’s “original masterpiece” form, though it’s also suspected that his Pumpkin Knight contributed to the connection of pumpkins being associated with him.

Soul Cakes were created in the shape of simplified flames, akin to the very same blue heart-flame Ortho has on his chest. Nowadays they’ve changed in design and ingredients, the same flame shape gaining new hues and colors as mortals got more creative with the food dyes. One thing that hasn’t changed is the center being filled with jam of various flavors. Tart jams tend to be the usual, but sweet can be used as well.

[citrusreadstoa]

Reading The Hidden Oracle: Chapter 33 (SPOILERS)

When Apollo enters the grove, do you think he's still repeating YMCA in his head?

"Happiness approaches" Happiness approaches! It is part of a prophecy! Different one, though, it sounds like. "Caves of blue" sounds like the Cave of Trophonius they mentioned when they listed the other Oracles. Wait, are we talkin' underwater caves? 'Cause I've watched many caving disaster cautionary videos on YouTube and water caves are always, like, the worst. Also, I betcha twenty-five bucks the ripe banana is actually gonna be important somehow.

"I felt as if dozens of important statements, each vital to my survival, were being blended together, loaded in a shotgun, and fired at my face. (Oh, that's a rather good image. I'll have to use it in a haiku.)" I'll hold you to that, Apollo. I'm gonna be keeping an eye out for it in the chapter titles.

"I was afraid that if I listened too long, I would order the food processor for three easy installments of $39.99, and my sanity would be lost forever." This is a great out-of-context line.

"Apples? Peaches! Mangoes? Peaches!" He's losing it. He's losing it!

"If I blamed her for the way Nero had twisted her emotions, I was no better than the Beast." He gets it! (He was arguably already no better than the Beast, but he's getting better.)

"The grove hushed, as if the trees were listening and thinking, Oooh, pretty." So wind chimes are the only sound beautiful enough that the trees will actually stop to listen to.

"Was forced death and madness to swallow" Have we not gotten to the loss of sanity yet? I guess Apollo dealt pretty well with the crazy Dodona trees, so... the best is yet to come?

"A sonnet I could have handled. A quatrain would have been cause for celebration. But only the deadliest prophecies are couched in the form of a limerick." Does Apollo have experience with deadly limericks? (Of course he should, he's the god of prophecy!) A sonnet would make for a crazy long prophecy, by the way. A quatrain is the four-lined kind we usually get. Also, this is now two prophecies out of one visit to the grove and we haven't even heard the full prophecy for the "fall of the sun" one yet. Are we getting multiple prophecies per book? That would be-- I would have to whip out a notebook and start jotting them all down if that's what's happening.

"I release you." Is that a thing she can do? "You can't possibly believe in Nero now." It's a human thing. When we are proven wrong, we have a tendency to cling even closer to what we believed in before because we don't want to believe we were wrong. It's called belief perseverance or conceptual conservatism. There was a study about it involving a cult whose predictions were proven wrong. Some people bet that most of the cultists would abandon the cult while others bet they would dig their heels in even more. Turns out, most of the cultists dug their heels in and stood by the cult. "My dad... my dad unleashed the Beast. He made it angry." It's fascinating that Meg would go so far as to blame her own dad for his death. It shows how long she must've spent being raised by Nero.

"she turned and fled . . . It seemed to me that they dissolved into the trees" We'll get her back. She's too important a character to be gone for long, I say overconfidently.

"an arrow with an oak shaft and green fletching." It doesn't sound like one of Artemis's arrows, but could it be?