#OH ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY

[thatgirlonstage]

sometimes a show throws a scenario at you that you could see coming a hundred miles off but that in no way is gonna prevent you from going absolutely feral over it. Anyway I binged all of Link Click in like three days and I'm going to start chewing furniture about the end of S2

[re-alku]

@emmamushi @thecatamaranlad

So what this paint company does is take iron pollution from abandoned mines that are polluting soils and rivers and makes iron based red pigment paints out of it.

Basically they realized hey no one's cleaning this shit up, it's polluting the streams, killing all the fish, making the water undrinkable and there's a huge market for it so why not make money by cleaning it the fuck up?

They remove this stuff by the industrial bucket load from the rivers. The idea is if it's in a painting, if it's in your home, it's not poisoning wildlife.

anyway its cool as shit, please support tf out of these people https://gamblinstore.com/reclaimed-earth-colors-set/

[sentientsky]

"And that's hard, Scully… suspecting everyone, everything. It wears you down. You even begin to doubt what you know is the truth."

[honeypuddles95]

[olessan]

Rings of Power from August 29 through to October 2nd

Final Fantasy XVI on September 17th

Dragon Age Veilguard on October 31st

[iviarelleblr]

I'm not a fan of negative propaganda on polls so my last reblog tags were fucking tame in comparison to my actual feelings on the Left Hand of Darkness, and I'm not afraid to say it out loud (though I am afraid of letting this break containment). I will gesture toward my review, 1500 or so words on why I resented reading it in 2019 and why I might never read another Le Guin because I was just so angry at how people kept pushing this book at me vs what I got from it. I can also add that my feelings have not changed: LHOD is a Gender 101 text at BEST and that's mostly owing to how it's obviously been a lot of people's awakening to paying attention to gender, not some inherent value in the text itself that should place it above any other. I still get a visceral, nauseous anger reaction when people suggest I should read Earthsea or "The Word For World Is Forest".

Stop touting this book as some kind of universal Gender Bible appropriate and loveable at all stages of one's journey. I'm not saying it can't be important to anyone, but there is, in fact, SO MUCH BETTER OUT THERE NOW that you can also look into, and that's so much better to recommend as a foundational text for how we understand things to be today. You don't need to keep clinging to this out of anything more than nostalgia and gratefulness that it was important to you personally at a time when you needed it.

[tealeavesandthorns]

// If you ever feel bad about your writing just remember the line

"I've had this knife of sadness in my heart." - made it into the movie Blade Trinity and someone thought it was both cool enough and emotional enough to remain in there....

[captain-hawks]

hii dee! thanks so much for indulging us with these spicy sleepovers :3 for this weekend, what about mattsun and a summer carnival? I'm not sure if you're familiar with disco pang pang but I have the clearest image in my mind of the ride operator shaking you onto his lap and when you land you're like "why tf does this guy have an entire can of pringles in his pants" (it is not a can of pringles 🤭)

(oh my god i love you for this idea HAAAAAAAAAA. please suspend your disbelief as i pretend i know what i'm talking about with this ride for the sake of the horny agenda<3)

dizzy

issei matsukawa x f!reader

...in which your quiet little crush on mattsun suddenly becomes a big, hard, wholly unavoidable affair when you find yourself accidentally straddling his lap on a ride at the carnival.

c: 18+ only, dry humping, mattsun's big dick

“I hate you, Oikawa!” you yelp, fingers scrambling for purchase on the metal bars behind you as the spinning wheel of death whirs to life and immediately sends you careening sideways, your knees knocking into Makki’s. 

“It’ll be fun!” he’d exclaimed when you arrived at the bustling summer carnival and stumbled across the Disco Pang Pang ride, proceeding to show you several viral videos of the horrific ride in other places as you waited in line with him, Mattsun, and Makki.

(Iwaizumi had taken one look at it and proclaimed, “Absofuckinglutely not.”)

(You regret not following his lead.)

“This is fun!” Oikawa shouts, leaning over Makki on your left. You’d reach out to punch the boyish grin off of his face, if you weren’t currently holding on for dear life as the ride operator decides it’s time to start bouncing up and down as well. 

There’s another violent spin in the other direction, and you groan loudly, closing your eyes as your body slides, and you can hear a warm laugh beside you—Mattsun. Your breath hitches in your throat as you become hyper aware of the way your thighs are nearly flush together.

“Are you okay?” he asks, nose brushing against your ear to ensure you can hear him over the screams and laughter around you. 

His breath is hot against your neck, and your heart thrums behind your ribcage in a heady, dizzy rhythm that leaves you distracted enough that the sweaty fingers of your right hand slip off of the metal bar with a loud squeak. Mattsun’s hand claps down over yours, holding it against the railing, and he glances at you sideways with a grin before looking away again. 

He doesn’t take his hand off of yours.

If it were anyone else, this would be fine.

(And if it were Oikawa beside you, you’d probably use his t-shirt as an anchor if only to accidentally rip the sleeve in the process. As payback and all.)

But this is Mattsun.

Mattsun, with his soft eyes and perpetually tousled hair. His gentle, always slightly amused smile. His oddly attractive collarbones (you’ve never been attracted to fucking collarbones before) and long fingers and muscled forearms. 

Mattsun, who you’ve got a terribly inconvenient crush on. 

The ride continues to spin and bounce, Makki bumping into your other side every so often, both he and Oikawa howling with laughter as another group across from you goes tumbling from their seats. Mattsun’s hand stays exactly where it is.

You nearly end up in Makki’s lap, but Mattsun’s fingers flex a little tighter over yours, and he hooks his ankle over yours to steady you in place. He doesn’t seem perturbed in the slightest as he does it, like the reflex is natural to him. 

Your skin burns everywhere that he touches.

The ride slows down, and for one brief, fleeting moment, you think you’re free to sprint to the nearest cotton candy stand to override the frantic beating of your smitten heart with a sugar rush. 

And then all hell breaks loose as the operator lets out a boisterous laugh and sends the ride careening and bouncing even faster than before.

Makki and Oikawa slide several feet away, collapsing into a group of giggling, shouting girls. A few other people stumble and fall and begin holding on to one another for dear life. And you find yourself momentarily airborne, your entire body flinging upwards and sideways until two strong arms wrap around you and firmly tug you downward.

Right into Mattsun’s lap.

The ride continues to spin, and Mattsun holds you tight, the arm that’s still around you tensing to keep you from getting jostled too much after each subsequent spin and jump as he holds the bar with the other.

It should be jarring, the feeling of his broad chest flush against your back, his chin on your shoulder. 

But as you slip just enough that you end up straddling just one of his legs, you suddenly find it incredibly difficult to concentrate on anything other than the way his muscled thigh is pressing right into your core, the rigid seam of your jean shorts doing you no favors in lessening the feeling currently unfurling in your abdomen.

Mattsun notices you’re sliding forward, and he drags you back into the cradle of his lap. Biting down on your lower lip, you stifle the moan that threatens to crawl up your throat at the pressure it puts on your clit in the process.

And then all thoughts swiftly leave your mind when you feel something hard pressing into your ass.

Something very hard and very fucking big. 

Spending time with Oikawa, Makki, Iwa, and Mattsun has made you privy to far too many things, like their jokes about the latter’s “big dick.”

So while you should have been at least marginally prepared in some capacity, when the ride jumps and you bounce in his lap again, finding yourself straddling both of his legs again with your legs spread wide to steady yourself, you still gasp when you’re treated to the accidental experience of your cunt dragging down the full, thick outline of his shaft.

You pray he didn’t hear you.

The ride carries on spinning, and you grow more and more wet with each turn, your soaked panties digging into your slick, dripping folds as you bounce on Mattsun’s dick. If you didn’t know better, you’d swear Mattsun’s breathing sounds a little ragged against your shoulder, and his grip on your side slides a little lower, his fingers grasping your hip instead. With the way your shirt’s ridden up, his thumb and pointer finger are against your bare skin, which does little to cool the wet, blazing heat currently gushing between your legs. 

You’re dizzy with arousal, pleasure simmering through your veins as your pussy greedily lets gravity stroke your folds against Mattsun’s cock. 

His lips brush against the shell of your ear, and his voice is low and rough. “Are you—”

The ride bounces again, and a sharp, vibrant burst of pleasure sears your nerve endings. You gasp.

Mattsun fucking groans.

—and you nearly explode.

He takes your earlobe between his teeth. “Does it feel good?” he murmurs.

You nod, inhaling sharply as he subtly grinds up into you, biting back a whimper.

“Fuck,” he rasps, exhaling roughly as he does it again, harder this time.

“Mattsun,” you breathe out, sounding more than a little desperate.

“Can you come like this?” he asks, his pointer finger slipping past the waistband of your shorts just enough to tug at your panties, pulling them even tighter against your aching pussy.

You nod again, afraid you’ll moan if you open your mouth, and Mattsun kisses the side of your neck. 

To anyone else, if they could possibly be watching while they’re busy fighting the push and tug of the ride, the two of you just look like a couple holding on to one another as you try not to go flying into anyone else.

Mattsun presses another hot kiss just behind your earlobe. “Come for me, then.”

Those four words alone are enough to send you hurling over the edge into the throes of an intense, shuddering orgasm, the shape of the syllables on his plush lips far more filthy than you ever could have imagined. 

But paired with the way he firmly pulls your hips down against his cock as he grinds up into you, you’re an absolute goner—the only saving grace for the shout of pleasure that accidentally tumbles past your lips is the way everyone else on the ride is also in the middle of another bout of screams and laughter as well.

Neither you or Mattsun say anything to each other when you finally exit the ride, though his hand ghosts over the small of your back as you follow a stumbling, giggling Oikawa and Makki toward where Iwa is waiting with his arms crossed on a bench nearby.

(But shortly after, when you excuse yourself to find a bathroom, you don’t have to look behind you to know that Mattsun’s following you, his fingers tangling with yours before he presses you up against a wall and kisses you until you can’t breathe.)

[trashyandtiredsol]

I FRICKIN LOVE YOU HUN AND @c00kietin !!! AND ALL MY MOOTS SO FRICKIN MUCH YOU ALL ARE ONE OF THE BEST PARTS OF MY DAY AND I'M ALWAYS SO THRILLED COMING ON HERE!! I'M SO GLAD I DECIDED TO DOWNLOAD TUMBLR AND INTERACT WITH Y'ALL

Mutuals Loving Hours

Okay this might be a sappy so...beware as I gush about my mutuals!!

I have so many things I want to say to everyone, so much I would love to tell you face to face. So many reassurances and encouraging words that I would have to write a list just to remember everything I want-- what I need to tell you. I would give anything to be able to make you laugh and enjoy your smile, admiring the way you light up. I'd make an ass out of myself just to watch your smile widen. If I could, I would grab those weights from your shoulders and throw them into the great lakes, never to be seen again. I would stand by your side as we watch them drown from their own weight, never to get that satisfaction of dragging you down with them.

You're a damn good person, whether you believe it or not. Your creations, the things your pour your heart and soul into are some of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. I can feel the love and joy you used to intertwine those ideas together, I can see the excitement on your face as you share your creations.

You are one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. I don't care if I haven't seen your actual face, or if I don't even know your real name. You are stunning. Stunning like a star that threats to burn your eyes the longer you look at it. But I'd be okay with loosing my sight, as long as you're the last thing I see. I know I'm just a stranger to a lot of you, but I still care! I will always care and you will never be a burden. Sometimes I might not be able to help you like you need, but I'll be damned if I don't try.

I love you, you made my void a little less empty.

<3

[sxcret-garden]

CAN YOU PLS DO A MOST LIKELY TO BE INTO DRY HUMPING HEHE

ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY YES ANON I LOVE DRY HUMPING DJBDJJXJX

Most

Mingi

Yeosang

San

Seonghwa

Jongho

Yunho

Hongjoong

Wooyoung

Least

Mingi the dry humping enthusiast!! For him, Yeo and San the activity is definitely something that'll satisfy them on its own, like they'll be more than happy to have you rut against them fully clothed (or the other way around) and get the both of you to finish just like that. Something about sitting in each other's lap, the fabric of your clothes still separating you and just going from a heavy makeout session over to chasing your highs like that is just so insanely hot to them??? I feel like Mingi especially would go crazy from the sight of you on top of him alone, even more so if you're wearing something he thinks you look sexy in (this can range from lingerie to one of his shirts btw, he thinks you're sexy in practically anything). For Yeosang the whole intensity of it stems from the fact that you're fully clothed and didn't even get to the point of taking clothes off cause you needed him so bad. San feels a lil less intensely about it, but still enjoys it as a standalone way to have sex every now and then, preferrably paired with some soft making out and hands up in his hair or fingertips exploring the other's shapes.

As for Seonghwa, I think he usually doesn't find it all that enticing, unless he's subbing. Then oh boy does he get off of this so fast??? Maybe a bit similar to Yeosang, he just finds it so hot that you're pleasuring yourself on him right then and there, without even undressing him first? And I guess in part the fact that it's restricting him from being inside you is also smth he enjoys, just being denied what he really wants, in instead having to be pliant for you as you chase your own high on top of him and wanting to be a good boy for you.

Jongho and Yunho feel very similarly about this, though I think Jongho still enjoys it a tad more than Yunho - they're not indifferent to dry humping, but it's really not more than a nice part of foreplay for them. They need more than that to get off (except maybe on the rare occasion that they're subbing, like imagine either of them cumming in their pants and what it'd do to them mentally??? 🫣 anywayyy), but won't stop you from grinding on their bulges a few times while you're making out. UNLESS!!! We're talking sleepy morning dry humping, Yunho certainly won't say no to that, and Jongho is sold. Get ready for little morning voice whines, especially from the latter, tho Yunho won't be completely quiet either, as you're riding them out of sleepiness and into both your highs.

Both Hongjoong and Wooyoung strike me as guys who are not exactly fans of dry humping. Sure, they'll be up for it if you're into it, but it's not something they'd spend a lot of time on otherwise. Maybe you can get Hongjoong to enjoy it when he's really exhausted and as you're having a soft makeout session with him one thing leads to another, but that too will be a rare case (IF it happens though, he'll let you hear the prettiest breathy moans-). As for Wooyoung... maybe when he's completely drunk on you already he'll enjoy watching you grind against him for longer periods of time, but I just don't think he has the patience for this cjnxxnnx (so if you wanna dry hump him, you gotta make him be good for you 👀)

[algae-tm]

ICK

F1 Grid x Rapper!Reader (platonic)

Summary : You’re birthday party leads to immense hangxiety, and an overly persistent suitor.

Currently Playing : Ick by Lay Bankz

Warnings : mentions of sex, I do not dislike Lando Norris I just needed someone to be pathetic, I worry I made him a bit too pathetic…

••••

INSTAGRAM

yourusername just posted

liked by maxverstappen1, lewishamilton and others

yourusername getting ready > going out

view all comments

user1 who cares about the met gala, we all wait a yr to see what y/n’s wearing to her birthday party

user3 lando’s comment incoming in 3… 2… 1…

landonorris can’t wait for tonight gorjus 😍😍

— landonorris georgeous*

— landonorris goregus*

— landonorris you look really pretty!

— user5 oh brother this guy stinks!

— user10 he got an invite this year?

— user8 my brother in Christ she doesn’t want you!

MESSAGES

MESSAGES LATER THAT NIGHT

TWITTER

INSTAGRAM

yourusername just posted

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, landonorris and others

yourusername hangxiety so bad I had to schedule a girls trip

view all comments

user1 to be a fly on the wall for that debrief

kellypiquet y/n I am so sorry - Max

— yourusername do y’all hear something?

— user5 wait why is commenting from Kelly’s acc?

— yourusername I blocked him

landonorris looking beautiful baby 😘😘

— kellypiquet Lando be so serious rn - Max

— oscarpiastri Lando pls step away from the phone

— user8 bro you’re the lame she’s talking about 🫵

— user7 ick so strong it transcends borders

charles_leclerc well I had fun last night!

— yourusername yeah we could tell buddy, Alex had to carry you home

— charles_leclerc my girl is so strong 😍😍

MESSAGES

TWITTER

INSTAGRAM

yourusername just posted

liked by maxverstappen1, lewishamilton and others

yourusername bad bitches rise!

view all comments

alexandrasaintmleux like a phoenix from the ashes

— yourusername still I rise ✊🏾

— user1 she may have fallen but she got back up

maxverstappen1 y/n I am sorry!!!!

— yourusername dude had one job

user7 was it deranged and out of pocket? maybe! Was it also real as fuck? Absofuckinglutely!!

— user8 idk I thought it was a bit too mean, he just has a small crush and to write a song is just a bit :/

— yourusername oh my god 🙄 he is FINE y’all, perfectly fine, please don’t call paw patrol

— user9 pls be serious he’s obsessed he’s probs gunna comment on this post as well

landonorris 🤩🤩

— user9 if I was him I wouldn’t show my face for 31 business days

— oscarpiastri keep commenting bro she definitely wants you!

— yourusername I fear this is my life now

••••••

Someone asked me to add them to the tag list, I very much did not do it, and now I’ve lost the ask… if that was you I’m so sorry 😭

TAGLIST

@forevercaffeinated-lee

@callsignwidow

@a-beaverhausen

@emryb

@c0deincrazy

@dontworryaboutitokie

@c-losur3

@chuxk-lerclerk

@silkenthusiasts

@ietss

@sp1rl

@destinyg237

@aliorasspace

[darlingdreadwrites]

Halloween (She's So Mean)

THIS IS A SECOND PART OF AN AU. IF THIS IS THE FIRST POST YOU SEE, I SUGGEST YOU CLICK ON THIS (“MAIN STORY”) TO READ THE FIRST PART OF THIS AU!!

pairing: Jeff the Killer x GN!Reader

summary: After arriving at Mr. Mann’s Manor of Frights, you decide to walk around.

contains: haunted house with jeff, scare actor jeff, making out and it’s slightly nsfw (under the red divider!!)

warnings: name calling (slut is used), he’s dressed as a murderous clown with blood on him and a fake knife

word count: 1.3k

masterlist

a.n: don’t be following or shamelessly flirt with scare-actors unless you know them personally and they’re ok with it PLEASE

“I want to just walk around,” you tell your friends. They nodded, walking deeper into the festival grounds.

Every few seconds, screams and laughter surround you – all thanks to the scare-actors scattered about. You feel a buzzing thrill under your skin, a mixture of excitement and nervousness propelling you further. You glance at your left, unaware of a man ready to leap out at you.

“Gotcha!”

You stumble back with a yelp, bumping into one of your friends. The man before you, dressed like a murderous clown, laughs maniacally. His sleek, black leather jumpsuit is zipped down just enough to expose a provocative amount of lean, scarred skin of his torso. Blood is splattered over his pale skin. His makeup enhances his almost-white skin, with dark red eyeshadow sweeping across his eyelids and extending under his eyes. The classic clown look is evident in the sharp diamond shapes that stretch from above his eyebrows to his cheeks. A black upside-down cross is drawn on his forehead, while black face-paint is made to look like his mouth is stretched out. Streaks of dried blood trail from his red lips down to his chin, completing the scary look.

You barely have time to respond before he leans in with a devilish grin – your heart hammers in your chest.  You think he’s about to say something else but he only winks at you. He turns quickly to find his next victim, leaving you bewildered and breathless.

You and your friends continue to explore the festival, but your thoughts are stuck on that encounter. You wander through the festival, trying to shake off the chill that his presence left on you. But it doesn’t matter how many fun booths you pass or how many jokes your friends make, he has carved himself into your brain. You want to believe it was only because he effectively scared you.

You start to lose yourself in the atmosphere, the tension in your shoulders easing. The interaction seems to be behind you and your group has moved on to playing games. You’re standing near a brightly lit game stall, watching as your friend fails to properly throw a ball at a bottle. You laugh as another friend steps up to help – only to fail just as terribly.

“Miss me?” Someone whispers, their breath hot on your ear.

You spin toward him, coming face to face with the scare-actor from earlier. He’s so close that you can smell the leather of his suit and a faint scent of nicotine. He laughs sharply, causing you to shrink back against a wall behind you. When he pulls back his arm way too swiftly, you almost scream.

“You’re so hot!” You blurt out without thinking, closing your eyes tightly. Oh, fuck. You’re supposed to be scared. His job is to scare you, and here you were, declaring how hot you think he is.

Your eyes go wide in horror, and you seem to have genuinely caught him off guard for a moment. His taunting grin falters, and his eyes are just as wide as yours. Your face feels like hot coal when he bursts out into loud laughter. He doubles over, one of his hands pressed against his stomach. Your friends join in on his laughter, and you would have kicked him if your embarrassment hadn’t caused you to freeze.

“Oh, god, you –“ he gasps for air between laughs. “What kinda reaction – Jesus!”

“That wasn’t – I didn’t mean to – “You stammer out. You’re absofuckinglutely mortified.

“Nah, nah, you can’t take that back,” he teases as he calms down. Before you can answer, he grabs your wrist and it’s surprisingly gentle. “Since you think I’m so hot, I’m takin’ you with me. That okay?”

“Okay – “

You barely have time to look back at your friends who are now cheering for you. You’d get them back for this for sure. He’s dragging you through the maze of people, and you have to fight to keep up. He’s leading you toward the mansion, undoubtedly heading to one of the haunted experiences. Curious festivalgoers in lines watch as he skips to the entrance of one.

“C’mon, gorgeous,” he drawls, nodding at the worker who steps to the side to let you two in. he looks over his shoulder to flash you a smirk, but he’s also studying your reaction. “Unless you’re too scared.”

You’re too stunned and excited to resist, following silently behind him. A part of you really seems to like how he’s treating you. It was a strange mix of actions – like he was controlling you, but also giving you a chance to refuse. Not that you would refuse.

The inside of the attraction is dark and disorienting. The lights flicker above and cast eerie shows in the already creepy hallway. Every time an animatronic or an actor jumped out, you’d walk a little closer to Jeff. At one point, he got so tired of you practically squishing yourself against his arm that he just wrapped an arm around your shoulders. He pressed the palm of his hand against the side of your head, pulling you closer to him.

“What’s the matter?” He whispers, his lips lightly grazing your ear, and the warmth of his breath causes your brain to short-circuit. “Scared?”

Jeff is relentless, making jokes and flirting to break the tension. You attempt to match his energy, even if it is a bit shaky. A flurry of butterflies weighs heavily on your chest. He leads you down somewhere clearly off of the main path. He pulls back a curtain, revealing a door with a sign that reads “Employees Only.” He opens it with no issue before turning around. He stands in front of the dark corridor, the shadows framing his silhouette. He holds your wrist loosely, giving you another hint that you can stop this at any time.

“Wanna have some fun?” he asks, tilting his head. His tone then takes on a mocking lilt. “Promise I won’t bite… too hard.”

You hesitate for just a millisecond before stepping closer. That’s all the encouragement he needs, his grip on your wrist tightening. Who were you to say no?

“That’s my stupid little slut,” he purrs, walking backwards into the darkly lit hallway and pulling you with him. He looks at you and back to the door – another exit, he seems to be telling you. But you don’t move.

He closes it and the sounds behind it immediately sound muffled and distant. He stares down at you with a charged mischief that almost has your knees buckling. He holds up his prop knife, the flat side of the plastic blade lightly tapping against your cheek. He leans in, his breath hitting your face.

“Last chance to run, sweetheart,” he murmurs, his voice low. He’s surprisingly considerate as his eyes search yours for any hint of uncertainty.

You’re too caught up in the moment to respond as your hands tangle into Jeff’s hair to pull him into an open-mouthed kiss. He doesn’t waste a second, immediately closing the distance. You can taste the copper that lingers in his mouth – fake blood, probably – but it only adds to the intoxicating thrill of the moment.

Your back hits the cold wall, the sharp pain tingling just enough to make you crave his closeness even more. He nips at your lower lip and grips your waist tightly. As his tongue delves into your mouth, one of his knees slips between your legs. He rolls his knee lightly against your clothed groin, the fabric of your jeans stimulating you just right. You moan into his mouth, and he drinks it up greedily, his slippery muscle sliding against yours.

Your hand presses flat against his stomach, the warmth mixing with the heat of your palm. Neither of you seemed to remember – or care – about the blood on his torso. It was dried by now, so, as you trailed your hand up his chest, the substance flaked off onto your hand.

You don’t know how long you had been gone, but all you knew was that you had lots of fun. You just didn’t think what you had done was obvious. That was until your friends squealed when you came back, pointing at and teasing you about the makeup staining the area around your mouth.

[sqquiddd]

hello! i was thinking about a clingy reader who is very loving and affectionate with douma (and he can't resist the temptation to fuck her stupid due to how adorable she is to him)

(btww I just discovered your blog now and I'm already loving it 🥹🌺)

I SCREAMED AT THIS. ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY. YES. (btw wrote reader as gn, since this is a gn reader blog xoxo)

best friend! douma who you've been friends with for years now and is secretly in love with you

best friend! douma who can't help but get a boner whenever you touch him in some type of way; his dick stirs in his pants whenever you hug him or kiss him on the cheek cutely

best friend! douma who has to control himself from shoving your face down on his dick whenever you end up falling asleep on his lap

best friend! douma who blushes and chews the insides of his lips whenever you apologize to him for something that’s not even your fault (he finds this the cutest about you)

best friend! douma who has to hold himself back whenever you wear and show him your new pretty outfits (he just wants to rip them off of you)

best friend! douma whose hand immediately flies to his dick whenever you send him a picture of yourself with the cutest messages attached to them

best friend! douma who just wants to slam you against any surface whenever you two are together and absolutely make a mess out of you

.

“d-douma, slow down,” you gasp, clawing at his muscular back to gain his attention. but he’s so lost in the feeling of your walls wrapping and squeezing so deliciously around his length to pay any good attention to you.

“oh, you're so so adorable, y/n,” he sighs dreamily, mostly to himself, holding you tighter as he fastens his pace, his room being filled to the brim with sinful sounds of him slamming against you so nicely.

“god, i just want to eat you up,” he groans, his hot breath so close to your ear that the hairs on your nape stand up. “so fucking cute, and just for me,” he mewls, nibbling lightly on your earlobe before grabbing your face forcefully, slotting his mouth against yours. his tongue licks into your mouth eagerly and oh shit you taste so fucking sweet. “mine, mine, mine,” he moans between kisses, slamming harder inside of you.

“i’m finally inside you, after all this time,” he pants, his rainbow eyes practically spilling with lust. his face is all sweaty and flushed red. “do you know how many fucking times i had to hold myself back from fucking you? you don’t understand the amount of times i wanted to take you on the spot because you're so” he interrupts himself, biting your shoulder as he gives you a rough thrust, causing you to whimper, “adorable.”

you whine against him, eyes beginning to tear up from how good and hard he’s fucking you. “fuck,” you cry, “douma, i’m gonna cum.” you squeeze impossibly tighter around him as you feel yourself getting closer, you're so fucking tight and wet like you’re trying to suck him deeper.

“c’mon, c’mon, cum for me, angel, give it to me,” douma chants, shoving his face into the junction of your neck. he doesn't slow down and he doesn't intend to. he’s gonna be fucking you stupid for hours and it's all your fault for being so goddamn adorable.

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

I think the funniest option for the 'rescue mission' plot is reginald adopted yet another group of babies and all the other hargreeves are like 'oh we are absofuckinglutely not doing this again' and set out to kidnap them before he can start another superhero team

[ronearoundblindly]

Hi!! I just found your blog and 😭😭 you're so talented, like, what?? I def need more!!! I dunno if this is how it works, or if you're still doing the dirty asks game, but I was thinking maybe E,K,U and S (or Z!) for Johnny?

Have a lovely day!! oh, and well, happy new year 🙂‍↕️

Prompts are from this ask game and part of my ongoing list of answers! You can also find A, B, C, D, and V already answered for this boi.

Warnings for...well...they are dirty asks so be prepared for sexy and sexual content 😉 including (but not limited to) discussion of oral, somnophilia, ummmm tickling? emotional unavailability? and idk other stuff. MINORS DNI.

Happy New Year! I love ya! I appreciate you taking the time, dearie 💜 Happy reading... 😈💋

K - Kissing

So this...implies some romance that's not typical for Johnny. His kissing is less emotional and more intense and deep--but seriously, it's not an indication of his longterm interest or level of affection. (There is an exception to this which is Johnny has no problem giving hickies. He will mark. you. up. ((He can't be marked in the same way due to healing.))

HOWEVER, those small, nonchalant pecks--if Johnny ends up smooching you and it doesn't lead to sex, it wasn't in the middle of sex, or especially if there's no one around to see it,--that's THE REAL DEAL. Something utterly devoted has sparked inside him if (and when) Johnny slows down to kiss you. Or slows for any reason, really.

In regards to where Johnny likes to kiss or be kissed? Again, he's not much of a kisser. He's big on touching and groping and tickling, since he's a goofball and true 'player,' i.e. Johnny is nearly always playful, but once there's a connection made with you, he...

okay, so, the thing is, he actually does like to be kissed, and the place that drives Johnny wild is above his dick, right at his adonis belt, that v-cut, the pubes. This is so ridiculously intimate/possessive/reverent; he can barely handle the conflicting drives to melt beneath or conquer you. Strange thing...he would have thought the proximity would just make him want a blowjob but instead he's a goner.

U - Underwear

Commando. Easy-Access Man. Next question.

LOL, just kidding. Mostly, Johnny wears nothing, certainly not with his Human Torch second skin. He used to wear boxers but lost too many of those to a smoldering heap. No point.

On women? Crotchless panties are his favorite, but there's this new trend of booty shorts--he's very, very into them. Generally, he would have thought anything less-is-more would be best in his eyes, but there's this kinda *pop* in the stretchy fabric when it jumps over the swell of your ass...mmhmmm IT'S GOOD.

S - Sleepy Sex

Sleepy morning? You are 100% welcome to wake him up with some head or ride his cock to your heart's content, but Johnny himself doesn't usually start stuff first thing. This goes hand in hand with him being unable to slow down much. He's all about releasing tension before bed though. A good romp to tire him out and calm the mind? Absofuckinglutely. No, he doesn't particularly care if you were already asleep. You'll thank him later. Don't worry. It's always worth your his while.

Z - Zones

Classic man. Go for his neck or his crotch. Johnny is a #basicbitch in this respect. It feeds his ego to be touched all over--duh, he's got this glorious bod, you should want to touch him,--but he has never been a fan of biting, on him or on others. Since he's just about always in the mood, it does not take a lot of foreplay to get him ready.

E - Extra Info

Unpopular opinion: I imagine that perhaps the ultimate show of love/devotion/possession to Johnny is not marriage and all that normal stuff but, instead, if you let him brand you.

He works hard and focuses to not burn people, so you allowing him permanently claim you as his--which he would not do in a casual way, not with random hookups and one-night-stands, not until he is sure that word won't get back to Sue who would kill him--shows a level of trust he didn't believe he would want much less earn.

Johnny is aware he's a ridiculous and kinda stunted man-child emotionally. He's smart enough to know that. Johnny will never stop being grateful to the woman who can stick around, see past it, and grow with him...playfully, of course. You should never stop roasting him about the man-child-ness.

Thank you for asking!

[Main Masterlist; Dirty Asks Masterlist; Ko-Fi]