#FUCKING MADOKA SHIT. HELP ME.

[thatgirlonstage]

sometimes a show throws a scenario at you that you could see coming a hundred miles off but that in no way is gonna prevent you from going absolutely feral over it. Anyway I binged all of Link Click in like three days and I'm going to start chewing furniture about the end of S2

[moongothic]

Madoka is the promise you won't turn from a child, full of hopes and dreams and the wish to save the world, into a bitter adult who just wants to hurt others and ruin people's lives

Madoka promised to be there for you to remind you of the person you wanted to be and to stop you from becoming what you sought to destroy

Madoka made that promise and became the very embodiment of it

[namedr]

What are your art inspirations?

Disclaimer: A LOT of RAMBLING

Honestly hard to answer, nowadays I don't really look at a lot of art anymore but mostly just movies.

Biggest inspiration over the years (from 2020 to 2022) would have to be Kan Liu. His painting style with mostly just the round brush and hard edges really spoke to me, especially when it came to lineart I was a massive fucking copycat lmao.

Around 2022 I also began falling in love with Sungmoo Heo. The perspectives and overall style just fucks so hard.

The most obvious inspo would have to be Seonhyeok Jeon though, who I still rip off blatantly.

In general I began taking art seriously around 2020, when I found Kan Liu, because I began training to compete in bodybuilding, which I did the next year. I began getting super interested in how the body and muscles work so I just drew those a fuck ton, and those anatomy studies ended up really helping my art skills in general.

Anyway! For animation... Hiroto Nagata and Q Kawa are big inspos.

This shit is so fucking RAW and HOLY SHIT when I look at how the perspective gets just in your face I always just think "what am I even doing man I have to PRACTICE". It's like watching a Zyzz or Ronny Coleman clip before doing a lift at the gym but for art, shit's motivational.

This cut in Ghost In the Shell as well is WOW, I think what speaks a lot to me is when an animation doesn't conform to what's standard in the medium and tries to push boundaries/be unique. Be it in this case through insane details, in the case of Mushoku Tensei through bg animation mixed with extreme foreshortening or just a crazy perspective and punchy movements in the Madoka clip.

Overall it's hard to say what else my inspirations are though. When it comes to manga and comics I can think of Batman Year One, The Climber by Shin-ichi Sakamoto, Ultra Heaven by Keichi Koike, Solo Leveling (big inspo in 2021) and Homunculus.

Also, even though everyone assumes it, I haven't played Cyberpunk 2077 or am that big a fan of the Blame! manga, I guess I just have a fairly similar artistic vision to both of those.

For animated fiction it'd be Spiderverse recently, Millennium Actress, Silent Voice and a million other anime I've forgotten the name of. Naoko Yamada's directing for Silent Voice or other anime like Hibike Euphonium and the Liz movie has always been amazing to me because she is able to express characters personalities through their body language, like they way they walk or stand, in a way I have never seen done before. Extremely recognizable and iconic style imo. A long time ago I used to be really into watching anime, but I don't care much for it anymore.

Other inspo would be this guy on twitter, his stuff is insanely cool https://twitter.com/be_myvu/status/1725069515107533178?s=46

It's like that Ralph Waldo Emerson quote - “I cannot remember the books I've read any more than the meals I have eaten; even so, they have made me.” I think throughout the years I've been so obsessed with all kinds of artists that I've taken in inspiration from everywhere. I cannot recall them all anymore, but they have made me the artist I am today.

Currently, like I said, I would consider movies to be my biggest inspiration because I find it interesting how cinematographers are able to stylize real life, which I'm trying to get closer to. If I could direct a movie, I would probably stop making art right then and there, but I'm not really working towards that goal anyway lmao. One day, being able to make a short film in animation would be something I would like to do though.

I'm not deep enough into the movie scene to get the street cred of being called an expert but I love them a lot. Fallen Angels made me fall in love with fisheye back then for example. Fight Club and The Batman have a grit to them visually that I find inspiring, and movies like Persona and Heat also come to mind when I think of movies I just love. I could look up my letterboxd for a more thorough answer but I feel I've already been writing way too long.

For video games, I guess you can imagine that I would say Signalis lmao. Besides that I can think of Subahibi (vn), Muramasa (vn), and Va-11 Hall-a for inspirations

Lastly, I guess huge inspirations are also a fuck ton of music. I mostly listen to either metal or hard techno, but I think I'll refrain from any more yapping.

I feel that this isn't really a great answer to the question, but it's the one I consider the most correct, because it's never as simple as just mentioning one artist. With a lot of these you wouldn't see a visual resemblence to my art, but in all of these I recognize a feeling that I also find in my own art.

Thank you for the question!

[agonizingdespair]

So, I just finished reading through Null Magical Girl (Puella Magi Madoka Magica spinoff novel)

And, I think this is the most batshit insane, yet completely unironic and noncomedic story i've ever consumed in any form. And I'm saying this as a FNaF and Danganronpa fan, as well as an avid consumer of fanfic, of 4th wall breaking stories, of weird illogical slasher movies, and of surrealist content.

Like this isn't comedic or random, and it's not meta at all really save for some analysis on the nature of stories and stuff like that. But...

I don't know how to verbalize it. It's pure philosophical insanity at the level of the most confusing SCP article you can think of x10, in the universe of Madoka Magica (but none of it's characters except Kyubey), with a main character who must at one point become the "ultimate detective" and solve "the ultimate locked room murder" (Danganronpa brainrot go brrrr), and I don't want to spoil it but...

You know what? Just fucking read it yourself, I can't do this shit justice. And whatever you've heard about it being weird before this is likely just the beginning. Like I knew about the Homo Magica species being a thing. I knew about the time travel into the distant future to observe this species

But none of that is even scratching the surface of this thing.

Anyways, 10/10, it's not better than Rebellion but it's up there for me. How does anything manage to be this ridiculous and absurd without being ridiculous and absurd. Like this isn't anything like, for instance, Lasagna Cat. But I had a more wtf reaction to this piece of media than to that. It's just so uniquely, subtly out there compared to things like Lasagna Cat, not that I don't like that series, it's just being used as an example of the kind of insane that this isn't, to in turn demonstrate through that absence how insane this work IS. Because it is fucking insane. And I love it. And AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Maybe it's made worse by the fact that I am actually capable of following it's logic.

Maybe the best way of putting it is that it's a Mind Screw without being aggressively symbolic or random or tonally inconsistent.

I dunno, I keep trying to describe it and it keeps failing so I'm just going to force myself to stop typing and actually post this rant that wasn't supposed to be a rant but apparently I can't help myself when it comes to these things.

[clegfly]

Woo, it’s about time I made one of these… *cracks knuckles*

MORE ABOUT ME!!!!

HIIII!!!! My name is clegfly, or just cleg!!!! I’m an artist/ writer / professional paint drying critic/j. I’m just a silly girl doing silly things, don’t mind me. I use she/her pronouns and I am aroace!!!

LIKES

BULLET POINTS BULLET POINTS BULLET POI

Pancakes. All day. All the time. Everywhere, anywhere. Pancakes

That goes for bacon too

JELLYYYYYYYYYY!!!!1!1!1!

Why are these all foods what else do I like uhhhh

Warm. And cosy bed. And fire. And all that stuff

OLD COMPUTER AESTHETIC!!!!!! N64!!! WINDOWS XP!!!! ALL THAT SHIT

Bugs in theory

PLANTS

MUSICAL THEATRE

Graphic novels

Video games… ough my beloveds

Books

Okay now this is too long

Oops

Sorry

JELLYFISH JELLYFISH JELLYFISH

The ocean full stop actually

In theory

CHINCHILLAS

Uh

Yapping

Analysis

DISLIKES

anything on my DNI >:((((

Bugs in practice

Sport

Exercise

I’m literally hero omori

Commitment

Stress

Internet drama

Anyone who gatekeeps like. Anything.

INTERESTS???

All day every day, baby.

MAINS

OMORI- main interest as apparent by one peek at my blog… The brainrot is immeasurable and everlasting. Send help. It’s been almost four years. I love this game, its characters, story, EVERYTHING so fucking much. I’m like a billion pounds in debt to it also. I will be homeless but at least I will have my big ass heromari collection.

PMMM/ Madoka Magica- my favourite show! Consisting purely of sparkles and sunshine!!!! Why are you crying??? I’m sure not!!!!

DDLC/ Doki Doki Literature Club- another favourite of mine!!! I see a well-written cast of characters I deeply relate to go through extreme horrific horror beyond any of their comprehensions and I’m SOLD!!!

Coraline- the horrors are all consuming, but at least it’s both a visual and extremely well-written treat!!!!

TADC/ the amazing digital circus- won’t lie, watched this show when the pilot dropped and LOVED it, but forgot about it after a while as it didn’t stick with me. Then episode three came out and I’m now reduced to a blubbering mess whose brain is now significantly comprised of two fictional chess pieces. What happened? I don’t know. Send even more help.

LITTLE GUYS THAT HURT MY BRAIN SOMETIMES

Petscop

Fnaf

BATIM/ bendy and the ink machine

BSD

Deltarune

Undertale

Hawaii: Part II

SUBJECT TO CHANGE BECAUSE IM PROBABLY FORGETTING LIKE 20 AND ALSO HAVE LIKE 20 STILL TO DISCOVER

HOBBIES?!2!2!

Ya!!!! :D

Art

The main thing I do on my silly little page!!

…in which the art is mostly unfinished doodles… but that’s okay!!!! We ball anyway

YOU CAN SEND THE CLEG REQUESTS!!!!! ALL DAY ANY DAY UNLESS I SAY OTHERWISE!!!! Do not expect premium quality though lmao. (And also nothing related to DNI. Shouldn’t have to say this but. Uh. Yeah)

You cannot yet commission the cleg :(

Writing

Currently on a writing hiatus and have been for a little while (5 MONRHS WHAT) but… i do!!!! That!!!! Aka I write fan fiction AGH

Mostly. Heromari stuff. Actually all heromari stuff. I think I have one fic that isn’t heromari and it’s one I co-authored I love them your honour…

Yeah

DNI

Bit of a bummer, but I gotta set my boundaries to keep the weirdos out!! That being said, do NOT interact with my blog whatsoever if you:

Are a shotacon, lolicon, proshipper, pedo, etc etc etc. (yucky. Yuck yuck yuck. Fuck off)

Are homophobic

Are transphobic

Are aphobic/ arophobic (why. Why are you even still here)

Queerphobic in general actually get OUT!!!!

Actively shit on any of my main interests. Like ACTIVELY go out of your way to tell me how bad it is (what. What is the point. Just go)

POST ANY NSFW FULL STOP!!!!!!! (I am EXTREMELY sex repulsed and have been especially lately, I will block you on SIGHT)

Are racists/ xenophobes

There is likely LOTS more I’m forgetting so I will update this later… also just saying I reserve the right to block ANYONE no matter if you fit into this criteria or not. If I don’t vibe with you I will politely block you and look the other way!!! No theatrics required

Anyway with all the negative stuff out of the way… I really hope you enjoy my blog!!! I’m just here to have fun honestly and express my ideas and passions and work on a little page of the internet so!!!! Hope you have fun too!!!! :D

[8r14r-r0s3]

I adore madoka magica but when i think about it too hard the amount of inconsistencies that pop up from the soft magic system confuse the ever loving shit out of me

POINT ONE: what the fuck is all of the magic in episode one??? What are the purple light beams Homura is shooting??? What fucking gun is that Akemi??? Why can Mami heal Kyubey??? Can magical girls heal other people or just themselves??? Cause I thought healing other people was like a special thing only Sayaka (in this story) can do??? What’s up with the weird texture that pops up when Mami arrives??? It shows up when she makes the ribbon barrier to block Sayaka and Madoka from Gertrude in episode two, is that just like a force field she can set up??? That’s never explained, is that her magic power??? Cause

POINT TWO: what the actual fuck is going on with Mami??? Magical girls have a weapon and at least 1-2 magic powers. This is very consistent, Homura has a shield, time stop, and hammer space, Sayaka has a sword, healing powers, and speed boosts, Kyoko has a spear, barriers, and illusions, and this was seemingly true of Mami too, until fucking Portable happened. At first it seemed that her weapon was Guns and her magic powers were Ribbons and potentially the other weird shit she does that no one else does (Sayaka’s magic bat, seeming safety circles, healing Kyubey), but her guns are made of her ribbons, meaning she either doesn’t have a weapon or doesn’t have a clearly defined magic power. What the actual fuck is going on with her????

POINT THREE: All of Charlotte’s Labyrinth. Why is her grief seed outside of the hospital when according to her Magia Record story she witches inside the hospital? Why hasn’t it already hatched? Where’s the big witch explosion when it hatches? Where is her body? Why does the labyrinth form BEFORE the grief seed hatches??? On the topic of Nagisa, what’s HER magic power?? Is it the weird cake ritual thing?? The thing she does with the serving platters to homulily’s familiars? Cause I thought those were witch power things?

POINT FOUR: Why do Elly and Izabel pull people into their labyrinths when witches are supposed to gain power by people committing die? Or if they gain power by drawing people into labyrinths and eating them, why do the people the Witch Kiss not enter labyrinths? Also what are the exact effects of a witches kiss? Why does Gertrude’s make a woman try to jump off a building but Elly’s starts a death cult? Is it based on the strength of the witch? Cause Elly goes down in one hit to the weakest magical girl in the show so that can’t be it. Is it based on their nature/“curse”? Because then what does Izabel’s “vane” nature have to do with Homura’s relatively unspecific ideation in episode 10?

POINT FIVE: what the fuck happens when a familiar becomes a witch?? Why do they still drop grief seeds despite not having soul gems from which they hatched??? If they don’t produce energy from their conversion like magical girls do, why do the incubators allow this to happen??? Isn’t it wasteful??? Also will they be carbon copies of their witch??? Are there just TWO Albertines in Mitakihara????

POINT SIX: How did the cycle start?? What was the first magical girl fighting if there weren’t any witches that existed yet???? I understand this is nitpicky but were they fighting wraiths???

I have so many questions please help QwQ

[goodmorningdove]

homura only remebers madoka s asweet kind person but she did successfully hunt witches for several (hundred?) timelines. she can kick ass. and homura forgot that. homura woobified madoka.

OH SHIT MADOKA FUCKING. WITCHES. AND GAINS CONTROL OF HER GODHOOD. ok ok hear me out. Magical girls are when you dont really understand the scope of the world but try to fix everything anyway. Witching out happens when you realize its all pointless and your hope was in vain BUT adults cannot become magical girls because they have a good understanding of both of these extremes. HOWEVER when homura witched out it was a deliberate action, because her hope was taken away but then restored. Homura lost hope (probably when she went mad thinking madoka wasnt real) but got it back when she saw godmadoka and realized there was still something she could do to help madoka, so instead of properly witching out she became the devil. but like. homura isnt evil? she just wants kyubey to leave madoka alone and for madoka to be happy. shes going about it in a bit of an extreme way but like so are the incubators. if they hadnt fucked around homura wouldnt have had to save madoka again. ANYWAY BACK TO MADOKA. Madoka has seen everything because. yknow god. but most importantly she has been a passive force enacting only her wish. I think Madoka is going to "fall" from godhood to save homura, breaking away from her typical godly duties. she has Seen what homura has done for her and now it is her turn to save homura. She will then mature into a True God, which to me is a neutral being. oh shit im realizing stuff as im typing. anyway uhm. So if homura does become part of walpurgisnacht. what if. madoka. becomes. the incubators.

idk im just saying things ill behonest none of this makes sense im pretty sure.

[lizzardwitch]

Top 3 Kendall Ships?

Ooooof I've got a lot to say let's go

3rd Place: Kendall/Ivan. Definitely not helped by the fact that I crushed heavy on Ivan (still do) when I was a kid & and that I just as heavily related with Kendall then as I do now. It's so adorable how Kendall always looks to Ivan whenever shit is going down and he tries to make her feel better, the entire episode where he destroys the suit of armor and IMMEDIATELY upon clocking how terrible the situation is, tries to do something about it because he doesn't want to make her upset especially is too fucking cute. They're like a subversion of the princess/knight dynamic, instead of insisting that Kendall be his damsel in distress, Ivan adores her just the way she is. The way he's constantly calling her "m'lady" (even though he does this with every girl) has me weak every time. In the Halloween episode where they were skipping together in their costumes <333. Their height difference is also adorable (and I think it's great how someone who is so used to old customs and traditions manages to get along with and have a deep bond with someone who is constantly developing technological advancements and believes in science).

2nd Place: Kendall/Shelby. Probably one of my favorite wlw ships in fiction, I absolutely adore the development their relationship had from the beginning where they would antagonize one another, moreso on Kendall's end to Let Sleeping Zords Lie, when Kendall actually makes good on her creed to correct her mistakes and begins to cooperate with Shelby more. Given how they're the only main female characters out of the entire team of 10 and incredibly intelligent, it's really nice to see them stand in solidarity with one another and support each other given their similar situations and interests. Definitely giving the writers props for subverting the childish trope of pitting women against each other for no reason in favor of character development for both. Their sunshine/sunshine protector dynamic is so cute and Shelby helping Kendall relax while Kendall employs her musical background to help Shelby got me going crazy oh my goddddd Kendall/Shelby girlfriendism is so real (+ I actually have some drafts/drawings for a Madoka Magica AU featuring these two lmao since I'm a sucker for pink/purple girlies)

1st Place: Kendall/Heckyl, hands down. This is gonna turn into a yap fest but I've been obsessed with them for nine years and that shows no signs of stopping any time soon, they're in my top 10 favorite ships of all time. Much like Ivan, I crushed heavily on Heckyl when I was a child (and still do) and absolutely ate up his flirting with her, calling her 'pretty lady' and things of the like. You can see it gradually, when he hesitates between saving her or revealing his identity upon Wish Star attacking (although he's still in his evil arc so he runs off). When he catches glances at her while working. When Shelby revealed his villainous nature and referenced him saving her from the car she looked and sounded so heartbroken during the scene :( (and in the Beauticruel episode he mentions that love hurts, which I interpret as him feeling at least a twinge of remorse about fumbling his relationship with Kendall)

I also love how in the finale they actually work together more once he turns good (after literally SAVING HER AGAIN AAAAAA), like how they cooperate in taking over Sledge's ship along with James & Phillip, and he's STANDING WITH HER IN THE MEGAZORD AND STAYS BY HER SIDE IN THE FIGHT AGAINST SNIDE. I'm willing to bet the only reason it took him so long to turn good in the finale was because Kendall wasn't in the café to convince him lmao

These two are the standard of what I want in a relationship: his constant flirting, the way they're both sassy, snarky, and intelligent but also provide a great contrast (her stoic, deadpan nature w/ his flamboyance and effervescence), and when his convictions are turned for the better, he always comes back to aid them no matter how much he wants to deny it initially (he's such a softie omg). These two are like the old married couple of the show. The autism/adhd couple next to Chase/Riley. The girlboss/malewife next to Shelby/Tyler, if you will. I've got so many headcanons & AUs for them, drawings of them, fics for them, I have a playlist for them, I'm just delusional over them bro

[medea10]

My Review of Black Butler: Public School Arc

I’ve made no secret about my love for Black Butler. It has everything I could ask for. Sexy butler, cheeky brat, flaming gay reaper, stoic sexy reaper, J. Michael Tatum’s sexy voice for the sexy butler, Junichi Suwabe’s sexy voice for a sexy undertaker…Ahem, so yeah. It checks off a lot of boxes. And looking at my calendar, it has only been a mere 10 years since the last Black Butler season.

I thought I was needlessly cruel to Blue Exorcist for being away for only 7 years. To be fair, Black Butler did have a few things after the Book of Circus arc in 2014. Book of Murder came out in 2015 and Book of the Atlantic came out in 2017. Still, a long time without this story. Thankfully, at the Aniplex special in 2023, they gave us the return of several shows produced by Aniplex including Madoka Magica, Blue Exorcist, and of course, Black Butler. And the next story in this tale would be the Public-School arc where Ciel goes undercover once more for the queen to uncover a massive spoiler alert.

Now, let me try and remember things correctly as it has definitely been a minute since I read this in the manga. If I remember correctly, no we do not see Grell and William in this arc. If we do, it’s probably a flashback of some sort. I also don’t think we’ll see Sebastian’s love of felines this season. And if I also remember correctly, there’s a term used. A certain three-lettered “F” word that was used. And I’m wondering if Crunchyroll would be fool enough to use that word.

AND WE DODGED A BULLET!

Also, Black Butler will now be animated by Cloverworks.

Shit! Look, I know nearly every anime I’m watching now is going through the change. Konosuba, Blue Exorcist, Spice and Wolf, all of those changed studio hands. But I still have a severe distrust of Cloverworks. I know they’ve done some really good gems like My Dress-up Darling and Bocchi the Rock. But then you remember what they did not too long ago with some other animes. Wonder Egg Priority and the second season to The Promised Neverland comes to mind. I really don’t want any more fuck-ups here. Black Butler already suffered enough with creative differences when we got season two.

HISTORY: After a family tragedy that claimed the lives of his parents, Ciel Phantomhive was in a terrible situation that seemed to get worse and worse. At his lowest low, he makes a contract with a demon named Sebastian. Ciel sells his soul to the demon in favor of revenge on those who have wronged him. After fulfilling most of that, Ciel and Sebastian live in Ciel’s family home where Sebastian is now his butler.

Despite his young age, Ciel has not only the family business to attend to, but duty to the queen of England. His title is known as the “Queen’s Guard Dog”. Sebastian aids young Ciel in many situations for his job. From solving a Jack the Ripper case to infiltrating a circus, to solving a case involving zombies on a luxury liner.

PUBLIC SCHOOL: Once again, Queen Victoria has asked for Ciel’s help. This time it’s to get some insight on a member of the royal family (Derrick Arden) who appears to have gone missing from a prestigious school he was attending. Much like with Book of Circus, Ciel is in unknown territory and must put on an act to survive his new settings. This time, Ciel must become a student at the illustrious Weston College. Unfortunately, Ciel must start at the bottom and do as he is told by his senpais, headmasters, and the schools P4.

The Prefect Four (P4) are these four special lads that are head of certain households. Edgar Redmond, Herman Greenhill, Lawrence Bluewer, and Gregory Violet are the four that head up each special house. Each student is assigned a house and currently, it looks as though Ciel is in the Sapphire Owl dorm headed up by Bluewer due to Ciel’s earldom and family status. To add to Ciel’s plate, getting into any other dorm is troublesome as there’s bad blood between the four houses. Not to mention, snot-nosed little shits deceiving Ciel for petty reasons. And of course, going to school with his betrothed’s brother as well as a certain loud-mouth friend.

LICENSING: Black Butler has had an interesting time in the licensing arena. A couple of years after debuting in Japan, FUNimation licensed, dubbed, and released it. Hell, they were nice enough to license Book of Circus, Book of Murder, ye who shall not be named, and even have the movie Book of the Atlantic released on the big screen. During this time, FUNimation did drop Black Butler from its category. To be fair, they did the same thing to Full Metal Alchemist. A big fuck-up if I’ve ever seen one. But it gained it back. And now, Crunchyroll has it. With the death of the FUNimation website, Crunchyroll has every piece of Black Butler (anime) media.

Mm-hmm, y’all better have Brina Palencia and J. Michael Tatum coming back.

Well, shut my mouth! Okay, I’m fine by this. I love how they sound exactly the same as they did all these years ago.

Actually, they managed to get everybody to their original roles. Todd Haberkorn, Jerry Jewell, Cherami Leigh, Ian Sinclair, Monica Rial, John Swasey, Justin Briner, and many others came back to voice their respected characters. Not so sure about Patrick Seitz voicing Agni just yet. And as for Prince Soma…Um, next category please!

SADLY, THIS CHANGE: A couple of years ago, voice actor Christopher Ayres went through hell with lung cancer, COPD, and massive surgery. However, his long fight came to an end in October 2021 as he passed away. I haven’t gotten a chance to talk about Chris Ayres as I seem to have stopped writing DBZ reviews, but since he plays a key character on Black Butler, might as well do it here. There are several characters he still played up until his sickness and death, so it’s sad to see their character when they come on screen. I am definitely going to miss him as Frieza as he is best villain of that show. But, I did like his Prince Soma. Thanks for the memories!

With. That. Said…

*Soma is now played by Abi Kumar

NEW CHARACTERS: Being in a prestigious all-boys school, there’s bound to be a lot of interesting new characters. Oh-ho-ho, you have no idea. There’s the fake femme boy with the worst name possible. Lizzie’s older brother is there and is a drudge to a prefect. And then there’s the boy who shit his britches. It was more tragic than…whatever that scene in Prison School was. For this category, I’ll focus on the Prefect 4. These four play a bigger role as the arc delves further in plot wise.

First, there’s Edgar Redmond (the one in red), the head of the Scarlet Fox dorm. He has this charm that can woo the panties off ladies. It gets worse I’m afraid. Because it has been several years since reading this arc that I have forgotten completely that Viscount Idiot Druitt is his uncle. Forgotten the relationship, never forget what he did to Ciel.

Lawrence Bluewer (the one in blue) is head of the Sapphire Owl dorm (the dorm Ciel is in). He, along with everybody else in the dorm is more on the strategian spectrum than anything else. While good for grades, it’s not really good for competitions like you’ll see halfway into this arc.

Herman Greenhill (the one in green) is the head of the Green Lions and I’m pretty sure Erwin Smith’s doppelganger. Their dorm, pure strength. Just don’t get caught on the wrong side of this guy’s cricket bat. Hahaha, foreshadowing!

And finally, Gregory Violet (the one in purple) head of the Violet Wolf dorm. His dorm is full of those artistically inclined. This guy is crazy talented with his art. But, he does come into some suspicion as the missing person Queen Victoria asked Ciel to look into was actually in the Violet Wolf dorm.

JAPANESE CAST: *Redmond is played by Toshiki Watanabe

*Bluewer is played by Junya Enoki (known for Yuuji on Jujutsu Kaisen, Nasa on Tonikawa, Inui on Tokyo Revengers, Red Blood Cell on Cells at Work: Code Black, Naoya on Girlfriend Girlfriend, and Jack on Beastars)

*Greenhill is played by Shunsuke Takeuchi (known for Takeda on My Senpai is Annoying, Varis on YGO Vrains, and Askin on Bleach: Thousand Year Blood)

*Violet is played by Tatsumaru Tachibana

ENGLISH CAST: *Redmond is played by Reagan Murdock (known for Hayakawa on Chainsaw Man and Itsuomi on A Sign of Affection)

*Bluewer is played by Brandon McInnis (known for Sir Nighteye on My Hero Academia, Hitogami on Mushoku Tensei, Finral on Black Clover, Gyuutarou on Demon Slayer, and Mafuyu on Given)

*Greenhill is played by Jonah Scott (known for Legoshi on Beastars, Tatsu on Way of the House-husband, Raiden on 86, and Akihiko on Given)

*Violet is played by Kieran Flitton

ENDING: Ciel is making his long journey into finding Derrick Arden and the other missing boys for Queen Victoria. It’s just long and tedious. Ciel already made waves with the P4 by becoming a drudge’s drudge. But then, he managed to calculate a win in an annual cricket tournament. Something that Ciel’s dorm has been unable to do since his father Vincent Phantomhive attended the school. All of this is to meet with the school’s headmaster. This guy is elusive and is rarely seen, and yet his rule is absolute and must not go against his word. How elusive is elusive? A demon like Sebastian couldn’t even get his hands on him. That should tell you something.

Ciel will actually meet this mystery man as Ciel was invited to have midnight tea with the headmaster, the prefects, and their drudges. There, Ciel decided to get right to the point and start asking some questions, mostly about the disappearance of Derrick. Ciel is then one-upped as the missing person the queen asked to look into is staring at him right in the face. Why all the secrecy? Derrick is really dead. Not just that, but now part of the undead. Not just that, he was murdered and used as a zombie puppet by the headmaster.

Hmm…why does this have a whiff of the movie Book of the Atlantic? Because the headmaster is none other than Undertaker himself. Mmm and Junichi Suwabe is still voicing Undertaker in Japanese. Ugh, John Swasey is still voicing Undertaker in English. Continuing.

It was then that we got a couple of flashback scenes that explain to people who have forgotten Undertaker’s role as it’s been so long since Black Butler has been on. Now, do keep in mind that Clover Works is in charge for this one season. And we get a retelling with the new animation. And we see one second of Grell! I am fine with this. Undertaker’s appearance was because Redmond’s disgusting uncle had him come to take care of a problem. And that problem?

The prefects killed Derrick. Yeah, he wound up on the wrong side of Greenhill’s cricket bat. I told you not to get on this man’s wrong side. Things between Derrick and the prefects were fine at first. Derrick was Redmond’s drudge and I gotta say, Redmond has the worst judgement of character as we see several of his own drudges doing shady things behind his back. In Derrick’s case, it was hazing. Not just that! He beat the shit out of the students with the most talent and potential, to take it as his own to impress the prefects. But wait, there’s more. He’s got not only certain students, but one of the higher-up faculty members wrapped around his finger. Weston is corrupt and the prefects are quite disgusted by this turn of events. The only way to fix the problem is to murder them all. Murder Derrick, his cohorts, and even the teacher. While Derrick and his friends were kinda failed zombies, the teacher seemed to pass off as normal.

…I mean close to normal as zombiely possible.

Now that everything is out in the open, it’s time for a fight against the supernatural. Eh, not really. Yeah, Sebastian played it out in his head how his fight with Undertaker would go down. It would have ended with Ciel being kidnapped by the laughing reaper. Undertaker escapes, he lives to laugh another day. Sebastian and Ciel are left with taking care of the zombie boys and then having to report back to the queen about this wild predicament.

In the aftermath, Ciel reported everything he learned back to Queen Victoria. Her fascination with the undead raises eyebrows from the audience, but Ciel will find out when he finds out. In the meantime, the public will be given a false story about Derrick and the other missing boys deaths. Clumsy zombie professor as well! Redmond, Greenhill, Bluewer, and Violet are all expelled from Weston. Their drudges have been promoted to prefect. But no one is happy by this. Those drudges were there that night and learned everything. Like a British P.I.F. or Princess Margaret’s love life, there is no happy ending here.

Okay, one episode left. Now what? It’s like a normal episode of Black Butler. Normal in the sense that the episode revolves around Ciel, Sebastian, the crew that runs the household, a few particular run-ins, business talk, and loud hijinks. But during the episode, Sebastian and Ciel come across a little something. As Sebastian got a hold of a certain trinket of Undertaker’s, he was able to do some research and learn that there’s some special people’s names on it. One name in particular caught Ciel’s eye as it’s his late grandmother. So, Undertaker has been doing stuff with and to the Phantomhive family longer than anyone could think.

We end this season with…oh, let’s just say the beginning to the next arc. Get ready for some wolves…whenever this season comes to existence. In the meantime, just watch Spice and Wolf. It’s not Black Butler, but it has J. Michael Tatum and Brina Palencia as the main cast. Let’s just hope that we don’t have to wait another Goddamn 7 years to see Sullivan and Wolfram. Actually, we’re getting the next arc in 2025. Well, that’s lucky!

Okay Cloverworks, I’ve pre-judged you too hastily. You did a great job with Bocchi the Rock and My Dress-up Darling. And you exceeded my expectations here with the Public School arc of Black Butler. Good job!

Now that you’ve reached this portion of my review, you’re probably wondering if you should hop onto Crunchyroll and watch this season despite several other seasons existing and you never seeing. Hold up, Buttercup! Do not do that! I highly recommend at least watching the first half of season one and the movie Book of the Atlantic. Those two things should keep you not so confused. Book of Circus and Book of Murder arcs are semi-recommendations for this case. Mostly due to the fact that there are a couple of characters shown this season that you might be lost if you suddenly see these people.

But if you’re like me and you love to watch things in chronological order, it should go as this…

*Black Butler (season 1) *Black Butler OVA’s (season 1 OVA, season 2 OVA eps: 1, 2, 4, 6) *Black Butler: Book of Circus *Black Butler: Book of Murder *Black Butler: Book of the Atlantic *Black Butler: Public School Arc *Black Butler II NEVER WATCH THIS!

Okay, enough time has passed and I’m sure everyone has eventually made peace with what Black Butler tried to do with season two. You’ll either meet people who thinks we made a mistake in judging it so hastily and those who will never speak of it again. I am in the category of people who never want to see this again. But will happily watch the OVA’s that came from that season. I’m a Grell fangirl and will happily watch anything with him in it. Even if that thing features Alois or Claude.

Back to the matter at hand. I liked how they handled this season for the anime. Never mind the fact that I love Black Butler to the point where I would even gather up the courage and enter a contest to win more Black Butler stuff. I never do that and yet when FUNimation put this out years ago, I gathered up my courage and did so. Got me some nice swag including a notebook. I still have to this day and have Yuya Matsushita (live-action musical Sebastian) and Patrick Seitz’s (eng dub for Agni) autograph. I’m digressing again.

Cloverworks kept things legit. One thing I will always applaud Cloverworks for is their animation. It’s great! I mean, compared to some of the other animes that changed studios, this is one of the better outcomes. One thing that also seems on-brand for Cloverworks is recaps. Thankfully, they kept it to a minimum at the first part of the episodes. But then, we get a bigger (but slightly necessary one) when Undertaker is revealed at the climax. The reason I say that is because A LOT OF TIME HAS PASSED for people watching this. And yes, we’ve got a new studio at the helm. Plus, I get to see Grell for one second.

Did I mention that I like Grell? Because I do like him! But just like some of the Black Butler sequels from the past, I found myself enjoying every moment of it.

If you would like to watch Black Butler in (almost) it’s entirety, Crunchyroll has quite the line-up. Unfortunately, the hour-long Book of Murder is for some reason not on their site. Black Butler’s first and second season are also available on Hulu.

FINAL NOTE(S): A few quickies!

It still makes me hot whenever Sebastian says “Yes, my Lord” in any language. Violet is best boy in the P4 category. The OP theme is a banger despite my prejudice against any Black Butler opening theme not sung by SID.

[bucketspammer4life]

random punch out ramblings because fuck you

you heard me

- narcis speaks like the average british stereotype and has a light voice for his age, he keeps getting bullied recklessly over it, people can barely understand what he says

- Macho Man gifted bald bull a necklace with a small bell on it so when hes ready to go apeshit so anyone who pisses him off knows their que to run away, hes now trying to convince him to pierce his ears to gift him earings with bells

- Glass Joe once ate raw dough and felt his soul physically exit him, he has the bread version of chicken anxiety (?) now (its what happens when you get paranoid after getting salmonella from a chicken and check every piece you eat)

- Aran climbs on stuff for no reason when hes bored and hides in dumb places to grab ankles and spook people

- bald bull actually has his nose pierced, he just doesnt wear it in fights because hes smart and doesnt want to injure his nose

- von kaiser sometimes reads little mac bedtime stories when he struggles to sleep and doc is asleep or doesnt have enough energy to get up,

- Disco kid And king Hippo go partying on weekends, often ending up wrecked

- don flamenco once got caught eating an entire ass head of lettuce while he was staying over at piston hondo's, hondo is still scared

- piston hondo has cried while watching madoka magica multiple times, no matter how many times he rewatches it (no spoilers for you all im kind)

- bear hugger eats raw meat & veggies, he once DEVOURED an entire ass raw steak in front of everyone, food poisoning fears him

- bald bull and macho man have a frenemy thing going on, they beat the shit out of each other, sometimes Macho wins, sometimes bull wins, sometimes they have to run from sandman because hes done with their shit, they'll curse each other out but they will not let anyone else talk shit about each other

- Aran has been caught listening cotton eye joe multiple times and will not admit it, we know what we heard, aran

- great tiger takes advantage of his clones a lot, he has court trials with himself, acts out fake scenarios with himself and has dinner with himself when he feels lonely, his clones personalities of their own along with a lot of sass attitude, he'll ask a clone to bring him snacks and his clone will be like "get off your ass and get it yourself idiot"

- piston hondo & bald bull are good at math and used to tutor Mac until they both got so pissed off at him while trying to help him do his homework and he cried, after he got diagnosed with dyscalculia they felt bad for him and apologized

[pan-magi]

On one hand, I hate that I'm making a vent post on this fandom blog. On the other hand, I am really annoyed and in a bad mood for unrelated reasons so I'm going to do it anyway.

I want to murder and destroy all the porn bots clogging the magi tags. It's infuriating.

"Because you follow #magi

*porn bot post*"

No, no, no. GO TO HELL.

Magi is already a small fandom. A lot of religious and spiritual blogs also use it. Even if they don't tags things with magi exclusively, I get a lot of Madoka Magica blogs recommended to me because of the series' full name (Puella Magi Madoka Magica). Nothing against them, of course, love existential magical girls. Point being I can bet none of us give a fucking shit. Leave our small tag alone!

I could just not visit the your tags page but the "because you follow x" posts pop up on home and following regardless. And I like checking in on random tags sometimes. It helps to not miss posts from people who simply have Magi as their anime of the week or whatever.

I do hate just to make this a vent post, so I'll add some anecdotal Magi stuff that I've already been thinking to make a shit post about. Unfortunately, I have not had anymore fandom related dreams. *

I will blab about the screenshot I chose for this though. I lowkey adore that scene. Morgiana just casually kidnapping her friend, so they can talk it out. (For reference, it's when she meets Alibaba in the Fog Troupe hideout and then just picks him up and leaves).

The funny thing is, they're not really friends at this point? Out of the trio and their relationships so far, Alibaba and Morgiana haven't had much time together. Morg is grateful that Alibaba freed her, yet I'll say they both are better friends with Aladdin right now.

Morgiana does bring this up. Her reasoning for taking Alibaba is so that he can talk to Aladdin and they can sort out their shit. She could see that the kid from Alibaba giving him the cold shoulder and is like "no." It's heartwarming. It's not something I'll recommend, sometimes people need space from each other and kidnapping is bad, still though- I love it lmao.

Best trio, ngl.

*I have since had a sorta Magi related dream since first writing this about a week ago. In it I met Ohtaka, except I've only ever looked at a few pictures of her before and know for a fact that how she looked in the dream isn't how she is irl. Maybe that's why it took me forever to recognize her. The first half was us basically meeting and talking about trivial stuff, not Magi or Orient because of not recognizing her, and the second half was me realizing my missed opportunity of fangirling and trying to find her again when she was not busy to get one of my volumes of Magi signed. Not in a desperate way but more of "ahhh, I'm so dumb and missed my chance. Bummer." I was way more melancholic about it compared to if I ever had the opportunity in real life. As if I knew it was a dream and not get too worked up about it.

My dreams are a lot more convoluted and trippy but that is the gist of the Magi related portion of the dream. The rest is irrelevant for this. Don't remember too much of it anyway.

That's all I have. This turned out long and I may trim it up. I feel better after typing it. That is what matters.

Fuck porn bots and may this small fandom prosper without them.

[bozepomagaj]

i was 15 when i watched made in abyss as well, finished the 1st season and promptly never touched it again because of what i learned about the author. From what ive seen from koreans they say that the version shown on korean tv is censored (which sounds plausible) which could mean that the weird parts that we skip may be cut out entirely(?dont quote me on that idk) soobin is on thin ice cause the 2nd season is worse and taeyong is in deep shit because i dont think there is any reason why someone should own the manga😟

I'mma preface this by saying I completely get everyone who couldn't stomach this series. It contains a lot of disturbing topics and at the end of the day, it's a horror series, of course not everyone is gonna be able to handle that, and again that's fine. But I can also say that this arc was surprisingly handled with a lot of care, wasn't fetishized nor glorified just... disturbing. Think of Outlast 2 or the ending of Amnesia:Rebirth.

TLDR:

Second season is way more disturbing but not as sexual in nature and Soobin most likely was talking about the fight scenes when saying how cool it was. And if he wasn't then who knows what he was yapping about, don't know him personally so I can't put words into his mouth unless he says something. As for Taeyong, can't defend him at ALL but calling him a p3d0 would still be a bit too much for me.

AND I wanna add after further investigation, Mingi said he didn't even watch it and instead dropped it because it was too much for him, so there's that.

For a more in depth explanation, here you go:

I'm gonna have to explain the lore in order for you all to understand this FULLY, so heres a summary:

The arc introduces us to Vueko, a victim of trafficking who was thrown into the Abyss with the rest of the now villagers because she wasn't deemed as someone useful. So obviously, when she meets Irumyuui, who has been exiled from her village for not being able to give birth at the age of 8, she immediately takes her in. As a victim, she understands her, and the author explains how, through helping Irumyuui, Vueko is able to heal her own trauma and heal Irumyuui as well. It's extremely well written, and as a fellow victim, there was something so sweet about seeing someone heal with the help of another. Especially when that someone acted like a mother figure. But of course, this is the Abyss. The point of the Abyss is that despite you thinking there's some light at the end of the tunnel, there isn't. Wazukyan takes that away, and Irumyuuis wish backfires (think of it like the wishes in Madoka, you get what you want but at a cost), and she gets turned into a horrible monster. But despite everything, she's happy because to her, she's fulfilled her purpose.

This is the part that I could discuss for hours because to me, it was commentary on how young girls even nowadayas are convinced by others that 'they have to find a man one day' and how having no kids is looked down upon. Especially in 3rd world countries. I could write an entire essay, but we're not here to do that.

I can tell you immediately that none of this was fetishized nor glorified in an yway, it's just supposed to make you feel absolutely empty because again, author is really trying to push that "oh you think you got the good end of the stick? Think again!" The manga if FILLED with situations like this, from Rico's origins to Nanachis arc, the subplot of this entire manga is 'how far are you willing to go to survive?'. Think of it like Fire Punch. Disturbing? Yeah, I mean, even I had to drop it once they began talking about trafficking women. Once again, I am comparing it to Madoka Magica but far more gruesome. Nothing explicit was shown, Irumyuui's private parts were never exposed, and her giving birth was also never shown. Her transformation WAS shown, but it's your basic body horror, like in most Junji Ito works.

SO, obviously if you're not a fan of the horror/seinen genre this is deeply disturbing and fucked but after seeing games like Outlast 2 and Amnesia: Rebirth, I wasn't as disturbed PERSONALLY. Again, recommending this publicly might've not been the smartest idea because you really do have to be into the horror genre to be able to handle topics like that. Even I just had to sit in silence for a couple hours after reading that backstory cuz damn, it hits you right in the feels. And most of the manga past that part just has badass fight scenes and when people praise it, they usually talk about that. From what I saw it was well animated and lots of clips were shared on tiktok, twitter etc. So there's a big chance he was talking about that.

(Examples of why people were hyping it up, even non-fans who had no idea about the series were going crazy because of this fight scene)

Now as for Taeyong... see now the reason I didn't mention him in the original post is because of that specific thing. I love the series and have come across physical copies of the manga but I know damn well I'm not buying cuz I don't wanna be seen supporting the author, purely out of spite. And saying 'oh well maybe he didn't know what the author is like'. Unlike some sites, physical copies DO include the extra chapters which contain stuff like this:

Totally unnecessary, not relevant to the plot and while some say it was added as a "haha funny joke" c'mon now. Let's use our brains. Now, would I call him a p3d0? Absolutely not. Would he be weird for this? To me, yeah. For anyone reading this, it's up for you to decide. I'm only here to answer questions about the series because I see people saying random stuff and making it seem FAR more worse just cuz they saw a couple tags.

[pinkberrypocky]

pmmm rewatch live notes: ep 3

we're back in the building! watching my friends react to mami in this ep was great. up until this point they were like idk why u felt the need to make sure to emphasize its psychological horror like its not that bad and then this ep they were like yeah so thanks for the warning thats shit was Crazy.

ok ok notes time

yellow lighting in kyosuke’s hospital room when sayaka visits 

kyosuke has a half hearted smile and a bit of a faraway look in his eyes when he talks about music w sayaka 

he looks away upset w broken arm extended when they listen to music and sayaka goes from happy and blushy to sad

sayaka gets all excited and makes comments about how cool it is to fight for justice as a magical girl and mami has to remind her it’s dangerous 

mami says she didn’t have the luxury of a choice

she had to make her contact to survive

which is ironic bc her soul was removed when she made it so she really died anyways 

and the magical girl profession always ends in early death anyways 

mami asks sayaka if she actually wants kyosuke’s wish fulfilled or if she wants him to be grateful FORESHADOWING

kyubey says the sooner the better and mami makes a joke about not pushing girls into things and everyone laughs but like it is literally what he does he pressures them and gets them into more and more situations that ups the pressure to become a magical girl

madoka says she doesn’t have any skills or passions so she wants to be a magical girl to have a purpose (me fr)

madoka asks her dad why her mom likes her job so much and her dad explains that it’s trying her best at smth that she loves 

foreshadowing for madoka’s choices 

your dream being not smth in specific but being able to devote yourself wholly to Something 

homura is upset that mami is leading them into danger 

mami brushes it off as bc kyubey chose them but i think deep down it’s bc she doesn’t want to be alone anymore

kyubey chooses sayaka to stay and watch the grief seed while madoka gets mami bc he knows that she’s closer to agreeing to be a magical girl and has a wish in mind and if an emergency happened he could get her to do it right away

yellow and orange sunset lighting when mami goes into the labyrinth that she dies in

homura tries to hunt the witch bc she knows mami will die fighting it but none of them see this and think she’s being selfish 

madoka is hesitant to ignore and leave behind homura but ultimately puts up no fight and follows mami

madoka feels bad that she’s not good at anything and relies on others for things a lot (just like me fr)

says becoming a magical girl would be her dream to help and save others 

madoka tells mami she’s not alone anymore just like she does w all of the magical girls in the timeline of forever

yellow orbs of light that look like mami’s soul gem float around them

mami tells madoka to wish for a cake if she can’t think of smth better by the time they beat the witch which is fucking wild considering mami should know the gravity of this choice

she is so overjoyed by madoka ensuring she’d never be alone again that she isn’t thinking about that part

she says she’s not scared anymore bc she’s not alone and rushed in without fear 

it’s that hope that kills her

mami dies and the red ribbon restraining homura fades away in her hand

like madoka’s ribbon 

sayaka takes things out on homura for taking the grief seed saying it belonged to mami which foreshadows how she is w kyoko and the other way of being a magical girl 

in the new ending a silhouette of homura reaches for madoka as she walks away

[rin-chan32]

THE FUCKING MADOKA WORMS ARE BACK

It’s like 4 in the morning and I couldn’t help but look at the trailer up and down cause I can’t fucking sit still one thing that I noticed is that they changed their designs, where they still have the same silhouette but it’s just tweaked here and here. Like in the poster you can see how Homura is wearing leggings/thigh highs rather than the tights that she’s known for. But the same goes for everyone else, they’re just changed here and there, but nothing is drastic. You can still tell whose who, which is what I like about the changes. But also how, from what it I can tell, it looks like there’ll be some more casual outfits and what not too. Which I’m very curious to know how that will all play into it as well.

im also like, in the trailer itself, but also like in the rebellion itself everything is so. Liminal and stretched out. Like when Sayaka, Hitomi, and Madoka were walking under the flower arches and how Homura was sitting in that throne thing and it just kept expanding.

I’m also curious to see how the phone is gonna play into the movie since it seems like it’s gonna be a huge part of it. Like in the poster is one of the biggest things outside of Homura herself (both Homura’s to be exact), and it was the first thing was heard in the actual trailer as well. But thinking about the paradise regained analysis I watched from Wendigoon forever ago, I’m curious to see if that will play a part in it. ESP since Rebellion was based on paradise lost, but I’m sure it will have some role in it somehow. But also looking at it in the idea of this movie being based off paradise regained, which role would Homura herself be in? Since the story is about heaven being regained and god trying to deceive Jesus along the way. Would she be the devil trying to keep the way things are, or would she be Jesus for trying to regain the heaven, or the law of cycles, as it was before.

But another thing I find interesting is that Homura was the one who was featured the most out of everyone there. Which is super exciting considering that it’s nodding towards Homura having so much inner conflict with herself, so much that it shows it with herself on the poster. Madoka is hidden in the background, while she is going to confront herself. Would this mean that she, the Homura post episode 12, still holding onto that hope Madoka gave her (hense why she has the ribbon in her hair), is fighting herself, as in Homura in Rebellion post-giving up on that hope striving for her own path, in what she believes in? When Homura asked Madoka if she was willing to be a magical girl at rebellion and said that “one day we will become enemies”, was she in fact talking to herself about it the whole time? Is she the big bad she’s been looking for throughout all these timelines?

Another thing is that, I’m curious about what’s in the phone. It looks like a spine and then a hand, which automatically brings me back to Homulily and how her body was all bone. Does this imply that she’ll be able to do what Sayaka did with Octavia, simply call on her witch whenever she needs it? Or does this imply that it will be something more sinister, either about herself or the world around her. I’m leaning towards the former since the top of the phone looks like a salamander, which is something that has been shown with her time and time again. So I’m just curious to see where this turns out cause I’m just. HOLY FUCKING SHIT OH MY GOD?????

[eternitylarva]

okay, so uh. danbooru anon. deciding not to be anon now. it's me! here's the full story, as much as I think I can remember and tell, at least. buckle up?

so this all started, I think, back in like... I wanna say 2018? we were having a hell of a bad time in our life because of being trapped in Mexico by our parents who were very insistent upon us learning Spanish and refused to recognize that we were horribly mentally ill (their fault mostly) and that spending months in an unfamiliar country when we were already scared to talk to people in the language we already knew, was, like, not helping anything, at all... Long story for some other time.

so while being there, lonely and shit, we started looking at various anime images when not, like, watching anime. Partially on twitter, partially on pixiv, and partially on deviantart. We were, for the record, like, 19, not yet egg cracked, not plural cracked, not any of these things yet. Nonetheless all these things were making us very hyperaware of our kinks and making us wonder what the fuck we even were. Our egg cracked after about a year of exposure, to which I credit a lot of things in hindsight, but they're all of or related to anime. Monogatari, houseki no kuni, Madoka, FLCL Progressive, that one scene from the second-to-last chapter of Bloom Into You being circulated online with a fan coloring and extremely confusing us and making us dysphoric, and the nail in the eggshell was joining The Pedantic Romantic's discord server and the many other trans people there making us wonder if maybe this trans of gender thing was how everything could be made some fucking sense of.

But also one other very important contribution to our Extreme Aaah Gender Feelings was one specific image of Nagisa Madoka Magica groping Mami's breast and nomfing her hair. We found this on deviantart, and, at some point, it went missing, the artist's account got nuked, and we were not able to find it again.

Except we were! thanks to danbooru! someone had saved it there. Here it is.

So, this particular experience convinced us that danbooru was instrumental in archiving anime fanart. Eventually we came across some different more active artists whose yuri shipping works were giving us more different gender euphoria, but no one was uploading it there, so I decided we'd best be the change we want to see. etc

Anyway this is where the problems start. Because it turns out danbooru is not an archival site. It's not run like one, it's not intended to be one. (or if it is intended to be one, then it fucking sucks at doing that.) It's a closed community of people (seemingly mostly lonely cis men) who want to maintain an ongoing gallery of the hot anime girls they like.

Consistent with this apparent aim is their (frankly fucking stupid) system of upload limits. You can read how that works for yourself, if you want, but in a nutshell, it means that as a new user you have to get your posts approved in the moderation queue before they're visible, and you can only have so many uploaded to the queue at a time. The more pictures you get approved, the more you get to keep uploading, and if your uploads go unapproved by the moderators, you get penalized with less permitted uploads. If enough of your images get approved and few enough of them are deleted (they're not really deleted per se, just, banished to invisibility in the site's search unless you specifically search for the deleted images), then, eventually you become a "Contributor" which basically means you can bypass this nonsense system and upload however much of whatever you like whenever.

They claim that this system is to prevent people from spamming the site with too many low quality images. But the thing is, the moderators aren't actually obligated to approve images, and most of them only approve an image if they like it. So, this results in a dynamic where, rather than uploading something that meets a reasonable standard of quality and being sure it'll go through, you have to guess what the moderators personally like, and hope to god that you're correct. If your tastes align with the mods, this is probably a cakewalk. If not, then, well, you have to fuck around.

I eventually noticed that there's a discord server, so, in an effort to get an edge in this piece-of-shit mind game, I joined there and got friendly with the regulars. Asking them and the admins for help helped me figure out what to put up there, and, it turns out, that if you're willing to talk there, you can just, like, share the image you want to upload and ask if it's likely to make it through approval. Sometimes you get lucky enough for a moderator to say "go ahead, I'll approve that". Easy win! kinda. if you ignore the having to join another goddamned discord server.

...still, for a little bit, it went fine, they seemed nice enough, I was open about my queer identity and none of them gave me shit about it, so I was like... this is fine, right? they're fine. they seem fine. There were at least a couple who seemed like good people, and I thought, yeah. Fine.

It was all going just fine and dandy, except that I didn't like having to talk to people, I found the whole process of getting approved tedious, and I was also noticing some of the site admins talking about how the immense backlog created by the general inaction of most of the mods was causing problems for like, the one or two moderators who actually try to keep up with the backlog and approve everything that's basically fine, and also even the regulars really don't seem to like this system, but not one person questioned... the need for the upload limit system in the first place? or why they couldn't just... delete spam on a case by case basis (I've looked time and again; it's really not that common, most of the shit that gets uploaded is just, fine), instead of screening everything for possible subjective spaminess?

Like, if Wikipedia, instead of reacting to vandals after they've done things (like they do here in reality) went and manually reviewed EVERY SINGLE EDIT for possible vandalism, and then y'know, a bunch of the Wikipedia admins took this as license to just, delete edits that say true things they don't like? And then everyone had to like, carefully police their edits to ensure that they fit with the personal views of the admins most likely to approve them? Like... that would suck for editors, and also would not fucking work and make a lot of unnecessary bullshit busywork for everyone involved, and also is basically exactly how danbooru works.

Honestly I am still flabbergasted that they just run the site this way. Like how has no one stopped and questioned this. Why the fuck are they still doing this. Sincerely: danbooru admins, what the fuck is wrong with you? You don't have to do this! I-agh. I didn't even get to the transphobia. Okay. uh

So anyway at some point in the discord server I took a swing at suggesting a more inclusive approach to tagging the genders of characters who appear in images (another questionable system that maybe doesn't need to exist, but whatever), Bridget Guilty Gear came up, many of the regulars openly complained about how a flame war over her gender tag starts any time anyone uploads a picture of her, and eventually, one of the admins responded to me like this:

I saw right then that there was no way I was winning this discussion, so I left an :| emoji on the message to express my disapproval and promptly exited the discord server. I then spiraled a bit for a few days, had an internalized transphobia panic attack that I manifested in a vent thread on bluesky, and then talked over my feelings on the situation with our girlfriend who expressed sympathy but also said "i told you so, y'know" and also emphasized to me, "you need to accept it's not an archival site. it's a closed circle of assholes" and I said, "yeah, I know"

Anyway, I uploaded a little bit more after that, and eventually got promoted to "Contributor" status, after which point (this was back in November of last year) I have uploaded a total of... maybe 60 times? give or take. The fact that I no longer need to go through the approval queue means that I do not need to fuck with the mods in any way shape or form, and, y'know, I prefer that. I do not like the site's community, but like, it's a thing I use, and I'm gonna keep making use of their servers to host my particular special little girls for as long as they keep the servers online, I guess. And I mean, also, I guess everything I post there is inevitably getting mirrored on some other site, so. Yeah

...I mean I guess it also helps that I know nothing about guilty gear and don't follow any artists who draw Bridget. At least not currently. so

I hope this has answered all of your questions!

Thank you very much for writing all of this up. It was a fascinating read! I've been a casual Danbooru user for over a decade at this point, just using it to search for art of characters I liked or posing/framing inspiration for my own creative outlets. I too treat it like an archival site, but I've always got the vibe that it was mostly run by what I can most charitably describe as weirdos -- and it's eye-opening to hear just how backwards their systems are. I'm sorry you had to endure all of that over the years.

As for Bridget, I was pretty dialed in to the discourse on the site when it cropped up. Though I don't ever interact with the community, there was so much debate about her on the comments of some pieces that I was compelled to seek out the forums to see what they were talking about. It was largely the same as the experience you had with that Discord mod, I'm afraid. Supposedly, you tag what you see, unless you know the character is a "trap", then you tag what you know, unless that character is Bridget and she doesn't have visible breasts, vagina, or trans colours/themeing in the art. Yes, that seems to be the current compromise as of time of writing. The 1girl/1boy/2girls/etc. tagging scheme is really bizarre and they really need better solutions. Penises are considered a boy-only feature in their tagging system, but "futanari" exists and it gets the girl tag still. Is that tagging what they see or what they know? But every so often the discussion comes up on the forums again and the regulars defend the status quo because, well, to them it's a "ain't broke don't fix it" sort of situation.

Anyway, thank you again for this. It's not a website I get to discuss often or think about much, but since it's been in my life for so long, it's been rather interesting to get another side of it. Keep up the good work on archiving your special blorbos! o7

[muse-hub]

Wanting to write fanfiction but...

I've tried in the past to write fanfiction, and I've never finished one. I end up stopping a few chapters in for one reason or another, and now I want to write again however I'm afraid that if I start what I want to write that I will just do it again cause I have nobody to prod me into "hey you should do the thing you want to do" Executive dysfunction is fucking hard to deal with especially in tandem with anxiety and nobody to help you with it. I don't even have a proofreader. It'd be really nice to have that, but I've got literally one friend, and they have their own shit to deal with... Not sure if this is a call for a proofreader, asking for a friend, or coauthor, or just bitching about my situation but here it is. I wanna write a Madoka Magica self-insert/sort of crossover with the Kaleid Liner Prisma Illya cause there's literally one crossover for that and it's long since dead.