#Not that I have been personally able to go on vacation in years
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Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind AU where Suguru erases Satoru from his memory and then Satoru does the same out of spite
But unlike in the movie theyâre not meeting each other for the next ten years after that. Till one day someone leaks the files that were kept in the archive by the company that provides the service.
Itâs been ten years already. Satoru touches an old ink on paper that forms a date like it's supposed to make everything feel more real. These memories are older than some of his students. He barely even remembers what kind of a person he was back then. All thatâs left from his early twenties is a faint feeling of absence â as if he was missing a place that never existed.
Turns out it was a person.
«Do I just tell you everything I think about?» his own voice on the tape asks. «Anything? Thatâll help to perform the procedure, right?»
He doesnât remember this conversation.
He doesn't remember going to that clinic at all.
He goes through the tapes listening to himself â funnily familiar, â his words are almost petty sometimes.
«Suguru never wants to watch the movies I want,» the voice on the tape says. «He complains that Iâm being repetitive. Iâve been watching a lot of new stuff lately, you know. Iâve watched ten new movies for the pasâŠÂ»
His finger skips to another timestamp marked on the list.
«A Chinese restaurant».
«I asked him out that day. I wanted to go to that new Chinese place because I wanted us to feel like a couple again,» the voice says. «It's been a while since we went out together. Yeah, I've been busy, but heâs always in the wrong mood when it comes to anything I suggest. How is that my fault now?»
Does it still matter? That Chinese place he was talking about was closed eight years ago â redesigned to be a convenience store or something like that â now it probably belongs to some retail chain with all doors indistinguishable from one another. Heâs moved two times since then.
And another one.
«Heâs always sulky, you see. Even after sex lately. I can picture that⊠Ugh, I can picture that face he does. Right now, I can do it. And he always says heâs fine like I'm supposed to guess what might make him happy. And I never can. Can you get it erased first so that I donât have to think about it anytime I close my eyes? Can you do it first?»
«This procedure is done in one go,» the doctor answers. «No particular order. Please, continue».
He does.
«He said I canât change and he doesnât want to force me. Well, Iâm sorry I donât like to let go of the things that I love. Is that worse than not being able to commit to anything even when itâs hard?»
«I hope heâd be happy if he knew I'm doing this. That's certainly a change, right?»
And another one.
«He never tells me anything», the voice on the tape says. «Not even when I ask. Itâs like I know somethingâs not right but I canât get an answer out of him. Or I can't formulate the right question, he'd like to answer. It fries my brain.»
«The other day he said we donât see eye to eye anymore. Why canât he just talk to me? Why couldnât he talk to me till it was too late?»
And another.
«Is he punishing me for something I canât understand?»
The room falls silent. Dead â haunted by the memories. Do they still belong to him or have they turned into ghosts by now? Separate beings with their own mind and will.
He caresses a postcard from Okinawa â unfamiliar handwriting and a ripped edge, he almost feels a salty wind on his tongue, â an old monster figurine, a plain white t-shirt that belonged to Suguru. And the pictures.
Theyâre so happy in all of them. But the voice on the tape keeps repeating.
«He got me eased. He got me fucking erased. He got me erased.»
Why the fuck did he do that?
Mad at the person he doesnât even know. Like itâs the only thing that matters in the world right now. Like nothing's happened after that in his life. No new apartments, no new jobs, no new vacations, no new boyfriends.
Heâs been through a few relationships in the past ten years but none hurt enough to even consider anything like that.
Because he never loved them.
Because he still loved someone else.
At least now he knows why his life felt empty when he woke up alone in that crammed apartment that somehow felt too big. And why it felt so lonely ever since.
He goes through the files â none of the records contain an address or a phone number. Or an answer to the question on his mind.
What if Suguru is happy with the procedure? What if the words â falling out of his own mouth out of spite â were true.
A call wakes him up on a Saturday morning.
«Hello, Satoru-u,» thereâs a smile in that manâs voice he can hear. «I mean⊠Sorry if itâs too⊠Sorry. I donât know if youâre a morning person or a night person.»
He gulps.
Thatâs him thatâs him that is
thatisSuguruthatisSuguruthatisSuguruSuguru from the postcards who bought him figurines as a gift
Suguru who didnât want to go to a place that doesnât exist anymore
Suguru who didnât want to tell him anything
who thought he canât change or adjust to the changes â yet theyâre both still caught
shit
SuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguru
it's him
«Uh, I gotâŠÂ» he coughs. «I went to bed late last night.»
«Did you get the files?»
«Yes, IâŠÂ» he laughs. «We were a shitty couple, werenât we?»
And then Suguru laughs too.
A laughs that feels like a first sound of thunder after the drought â like those memories are dried flowers everyone thought were dead till the rain came.
«Youâre with anyone right now?» Suguru asks.
«No,» answerâs too fast but he takes a pause before he says: «What about you?»
«No, not really. Itâs not serious I guess.»
Satoru smirks.
«Not enough to get them erased from your memory, right?»
A joke doesnât land as well as he expected. For a moment he almost believes Suguruâs going to hang up on him.
But still he continues.
«I donât knowâŠÂ» he says. «I donât know if I should apologise for something I canât remember but I feel really sorry.»
«I donât know if I can forgive something I canât remember.»
Another pause.
Should he â if thereâs nothing that holds these memories anymore. Itâs like someone dug out a time capsule you hid under an oak tree when you were a child. All those names and events in your notes that were so important. Yet you donât even remember half of the names.
It still hurts though.
«Yeah, I guess,» Suguru sighs. «I think thereâs a bright side to it. Weâre older now so we wonât repeat the same mistakes.»
«You think?»
«That's how it's supposed to be when you're getting mature.»
«Hm-m,» Satoru smiles. «I don't know about that actually. We're more experienced now. So we can always use that knowledge to make things worse.»
Sharing another laugh thatâs warmer and more familiar like his brain is riddled with the scars that started itching all at once.
They used to laugh a lot, it strikes him.
They used to tease each other, they used to kiss and make love. He used to remember that personâs voice and face better than his own.
Why did he let go of that?
Why didnât he let it heal and warm him? Because somehow he still knows that guy â he knows what'll make him laugh and he's sure they even talk similarly sometimes, using the same words and phrases.
Why did he let it go?
«Wanna meet?» Suguru asks.
«Do you?»
«Yeah. At least weâll find out if we're the biggest idiots in the whole world or not.»
«I know I am,» Satoru nods as if they're in the same room and all of a sudden he realises that he doesn't want this conversation to end. «Besides, I think the companyâs going to get sued after the incident. There're plenty of other idiots who would want some compensation from them. Which means weâre not getting another chance to chop our brains again. Do you think we can get some money though? I could use a new car. Or a fridge. Probably a vacuum cleaner would do. That's the mature stuff, right?»
A laugh that could belong to a couple of teens â head over heels in love â something he thought he never experienced.
Turns out he did.
And thereâs still time.
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk au#satosugu#gojo satoru#geto suguru#goge#i post jjk au of the day till i run out of ideas or give up or forget
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alycia: kinda crazy how we have so much in common, because italy is also my favorite vacation destination. i always said that if i was able to i would buy a home there so i could visit anytime that i wanted. maybe you can show me around the motherland personally one of these days. it's always more authentic when you are the one to do it. i know he doesn't. he has always been more than supportive of me. i just know it's been difficult spending time with each other when we're both off doing our own thing. he's been such a busy little bee himself with his band actually gaining some popularity, but maybe sometime after the holidays we can find some time to run off to byron bay for a week long stay-cation. of course i get a new onesie every year. this year i have this rudolf one, and when you pull the hood on it's actually rudolf's head with a big red nose. it is sooooo adorable. alycia: if this is your way of buttering me up then consider it a success. i just hope you still feel the same way a few months from now. that sounds badass, but also terrifying to watch. i'd be such a mess watching you play. not sure i'd be a happy camper if you got hurt. i'm just being honest. at least they took it easy on you and you were able to carry on. it clearly worked out in your favor, and you are doing pretty damn good for yourself now. i can send you her instagram page. not to sound biased but she's pretty talented. she taught me how to draw and how to paint, so it's sort of become a family affair. i want to find the time again. music was always such an outlet for me, and i want to find that part of myself again. alycia: [ typing.... ] alycia: also....thanks for the impromptu trip to las vegas. i can't remember the last time i had that much fun in a 48 hour period. it was nice to just let my hair down and go a little crazy for a little while. plus your company made it ten times better, even if we both had a little too much to drink and almost turned into a carrie underwood song. đ not that being mrs. mescal would have been a terrible thing. you just deserve more than a weird aussie drunken bride.
paul: italy is a gorgeous place. forever my number one vacation destination. i'll keep my fingers crossed that you can visit ireland soon. even if you feel that way, i'm sure he doesn't. you're off chasing your dreams and that's something to be proud of. maybe you two can sneak off to some tropical island one day soon, get that reunion going. that's how i make it up to my siblings when the weeks turn into months and i start missing 'em. cheesy board games and dancing sound like my idea of a good time. do ya get a new onesie every year? paul: shh, it's not boring. it's my favorite job so far and i'm saying that as someone that has had many, many jobs before. lots of differences! i'd say gaelic football is more so a crossover of regular football and rugby. no protective gear, different rules, etc. if i ever find myself paying again then consider this your invite to watch. you're always so sweet to me. bless. ha, no. they saw right through my lie but were nice enough not to call me out on it. think they took a bit of pity since i was walking in with a couple broken bones. i'm glad she found another outlet for her art. i'll have to check out some of her stuff. i hope you're successful in finding time. it's nice to have an outlet outside of work things.
#⊠㻠đ€đąđđ đźđŠ đŁđŠđŠđ± đźđŠ đȘđ§ đșđ°đ¶ đžđąđŻđ” đ”đ° đłđŠđąđ€đ© đźđŠ â ïč đŽđźđŽ. ïč#tw long post
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I am starting to think that being a tourist visiting Greek islands is completely unethical.
In a similar way as buying fast fashion is unethical.
This problem is very prevalent in the islands which is why I am specifically talking about them and not tourism throughout the country (though in specific areas that are tourism heavy the problem still stands).
Very coincidentally, along with Greece's economic protections of the working class collapsing, the new lucrative industry of tourism arose, after the economic crisis. With labour laws becoming more lax to "help the economy" we've seen the rise of seasonal work. What's that you might ask. Young adults with no working experience working in tourist heavy areas in service at restaurants and cafés and what not. Sometimes for 12 hours a day if not more, no benefits, sometimes they don't even provide you with housing, barely any days off. I've had cousins and friends who worked the summer season, it is hell and dehumanising. Especially with how many tourists there just are. Just earlier this month there was a story about how a sea side cafe bar owner had his waiters serve their patrons *in the sea*. THE WAITERS HAD TO WALK INTO THE SEA WITH THE DRINKS TO SERVE THE CUSTOMERS WHO WERE SWIMMING. "But tourists give good tips" AND THAT FIXES THINGS???? YOU THINK THIS MAKES THINGS BETTER??
But it's not just worker exploitation. It's how tourism becomes hostile to the locals themselves. How tourism is actively destroying the local environment. A friend of mine who comes from an island talks about how because of AirBnB locals are outpriced out of their rented homes. How students are kicked out of their apartments as soon as May enters because that's when thr tourism season starts. We gotta rent those apartments to our lovely tourists! How in islands even as big as Crete, every summer the locals have no access to water because it is all used up by hotels and tourists. All greek islands have limited access to drinking water and this is made worse through tourism. But you see you can't have the tourists not use water in abundance! How over the years I have seen my local beach become commercialised. How the public umbrellas crumbled and were replaced by privately owned by a sea side cafe bar umbrellas and sunbeds, making it so you have to pay to have access to that beach. How tourists have no beach etiquette, which ends up littering the area. How businesses' desire to get more tourist customers leaves to natural landmarks just altered beyond recognition, local fauna driven out.
Our government has over relied on tourism to rebuild its economy. When covid happened this showed how vulnerable an economy is if it relies on tourism alone. It feels like even our government treats us more like a tourist attraction than an actual nation. Obviously the issue is capitalism. Some might say it's unregulated capitalism. Whatever. The whole tourism industry was set up so that its vulnerable workers cannot even organise nor fight back. They are only contracted to work 3-4 months a year after all.
If you ever decide to visit Greece for vacation, I don't know, maybe think about all this.
#texterna#rant#I am just so angry man- and how my (economy major) cousin justifies that ''well you return with 5k home''#To hell with that#Workplace horror stories and customer horror stories#NOT ONLY THAT BUT we have reached a point where it is impossible for a greek person to be a tourist domestically#Not that I have been personally able to go on vacation in years#Imagine having money to leave your house lol#I can only visit relatives and friends out of town and that with strict budgeting
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well that was a shortlived good feeling about my job
#maybe i should just become unemployed. maybe i should just suffer!#recap of todays further events .#that supervisor? who i kinda didnt already like but now absolutely hate?#she came down to confirm that i wasnt leaving. okay . and then she fucking tells me#oh we're going to get another person to help out from this other company. we were going to do that bc we thought you were leaving#but she thinks that even if im staying there should be another person on this floor. bc apparently more has to be done#and there are 'constant complaints' abt this floor . which doesnt make sense to me bc there shouldnt be#and so we're waiting to see what the manager decides but hes on fucking vacation and wont get back until. next week??#she said she was gonna email him and like right after she left i emailed and texted him explaining everything#and trying to very nicely say hey what the fuck are you doing you don't need to hire anyone else#and if im doing a bad job fucking tell me so i can do it better. bitch#and she had the nerve to fucking tell me when she was talking to me#that i wont find an easier job than this one#well if its so fucking easy why are we hiring someone else#by the way getting that extra person from this other company doesnt cost them anything which is why theyre doing it i think#which is making me not feel good abt my own future lmao. like why would they keep paying me when they can get someone for free#and she was saying all this stuff like oh you have it so good here we dont write you up i do all this stuff to help you like . ok#i didnt ask you to come downstairs w the coffee order and if you wanted me to i would come up . god#but the thing of me not being able to find a better job like wow! what if i killed you. for saying that to my face#and she talks abt how shes been w the company 20 years ok and that doesnt give you an excuse to treat me like a child. jesus#anyway im very pissed off and not enjoying my work situation lol. i dont wanna do this anymore#but looking at other jobs im so unemployable. sigh
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it's been a while since i've cried hard enough to have a headache but. sure got there today, babes!
#ghost speaks#personal#ripped my favorite tights i've had for 5+ years and can't replace#can't return my glasses#got ptsd triggered by going past my old church because i took a wrong turn because i was. crying about not being able to return my glasses#have been crying for a solid 40 minutes straight#am still incredibly aware of how isolated and lonely i am#my parents are on vacation so i won't see a friendly face or get a hug till sunday night at the earliest#just. doing BAD#(well. there is the faint hope that the office manager will take pity on me since her office literally cannot manufacture lenses#that will meet my needs)#(but considering i spent a lot of the last hour yelling and begging out loud trying to work out a maximally sympathetic pitch)#(and also dreading 1-2 years of not having transition lenses because theirs fuck with my color vision)#(i'm not sure the hope makes things. better?)#i am gonna. make hot chocolate because it sounds like a marginal improvement over crying without that#the last time i couldn't stand up or i'd start crying harder was yesterday but boy did i not miss it#i thought i might feel better in the morning. ha. ha ha. ha#(like i know this is temporary i'm just. i just. i am so tired and SO stupidly ridiculously incredibly upset)#(like my emotional equilibrium right now is. not)
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its so embarassing likee. going to talk abt a feeling you have but you already know ppl will be like Oh that sounds like depression lol and its like. well yes . i know . trust me i am so aware i am depressed . but its still like a thing ive been thinking abt and wanting to talk abt but ik itll just be like Ok hun đ. idk idk what response i would want tho ig FNFNFNF
#not anything serious i was just thinking how like. idk. this is gonna sound rly stupid#but for me personally like. sometimes. How do i phrase this without sounding rly evil#i think obv ppl can spend their money however they want but like. its kind of hard 4 me to grasp sometimes like. there r things that ppl#spend a lot of money on bc it makes them happy like umm. vacations or pets or hobbies or whathaveyou. and obviously thats fine but#i iust feel like its all so. temporary and like. idk. idt im ohrasing this right at all i just likee. the thought of working all year to#afford to take a vacation and then working again to afford another vacation just makes me feel like i want to die. like. idk... i like#vacations we dont need to go on them a lot but ig its just like. everything we do just feels like a waste of time. not in like a Ohh you#should be doing more work Obviously its just like. idk. maybe it is just me. but i feel like im just waiting until i die and can be done#with it i guess. and everything i do is just to fill time until that happens. yk ? which is silly bc of my whole. Thing i cant talk abt#but ppl talk abt like. going out and partying or going on vacation or whatever and i like. I like those things its nice when they happen#but they dont rly make me longterm any happier i guess. everything just feels like another thing im doing. idk. this rly isnt coming out the#way it is in my head. and Again i know this is just depression shit or whatever im just like. its all exhausting. it just makes me feel so#tired. to think abt working and working and working so i can pay to be alive and i can save to do one fun thing every so often to keep me#sane enough to keep working and working and working and i probably wont ever be able to retire itll just be. work. and then ill die. yk.#but i feel like the vacations and stuff dont like. refresh me very much. maybe its just bc ive only been on one 'vacation' as an adult and#it was just like. coming home to see my family. and realizing id have to move back home yk..#+ like. my mom nd my gran taking me out for a weekend when i lived up there#nd those things were nice and all but once its over its like. it doesnt fuel me to keep going it doesnt make me feel any better abt having#to work for the rest of my life#ik im being ridiculous bc im literally unemployed and i cant even get up off my ass to get my stupid fucking ged so i can get a job and be#Useful to my family its just like. idk.... i try so hard to be like Oh nothing mayters and thats why everything matters type thing like. Yes#all things end and the point is to just try to be happy until it does#but i feel like it just doesnt happen for me. i feel like any happiness i feel is so insanely like. it happens and then its gone. and its#back to just. the knowledge that im still fucking stuck here. and i will be until it happens. yk. i play video games tomoass the time until#i go back to sleep then i wake up and i make a spreadsheet to pass the time until i go back to sleep#and everyday just feels like passing the time until i go back to sleep and itll just keep going until it happens. and its nice to have nice#days but whats like. the point. yk. everything just ends#IDK. this is all very whiny im sry. ive just been feeling it a lot lately . i hope this doesnt feel like me being like Ohhh you ppl r so#dumb participating in hobbies and going out and having fun dont you know yr gonna DIE? thats not what im trying to be like#its just like. i feel like it doesnt make me as happy as it does other ppl like. none of it refreshes me or makes me want to keep going
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A weekâs vacation starts tomorrow. Minus Halloween, of course, because I love working Halloween at the store enough I requested to work it. Iâm up to two kids who already are clearly living in their costumes: one in a Sonic Onesie with matching yellow crocs decked in sonic-themed jibbitz, and one Batman with the built-in foam muscles on a maybeâŠseven year old and five year old respectively? Best part of Halloween for me, honestly, seeing the kids who are going to *be* Spider-Man or whatever until Thanksgiving when their parents finally go TAKE THAT OFF WE HAVE COMPANY COMING.
Got cleared for the Jedi costume as long as Iâm bladeless and the saber stays on the belt, so thatâsâŠhonestly, easy, but also feels a little weird because itâs like âoh cool what do I do with the time, now?â Like, I debated making a togruta headdress for it but decided not to just in case itâs âscaryâ for the real little ones.
Carâs still needing to go to the shop because it wonât start and the hood latch is broken, and my sick time from the Week of Mystery Dysentery has come up mysteriously short a hundred bucks from my already not so great paycheck, and car insurance had to be paid.
So it looks like Iâm spending a week inside cooking two big meals to make use of the pantry stuff that just got cleared, with MAYBE a third if mom feels like eating chopped liver with me if I make it, and seeing how many paper cranes I can make to contribute to the thousand.
âŠItâs so weird working so hard to get full time for so many years, and now the benefits are slightly annoying and way less helpful than the guaranteed hoursâespecially since the home situation is so toxic and Iâm trapped, unable to go anywhere.
#bit of a vent post I guess#main plans for the week are to cook and maybe start planting the cranberry beans#the weatherâs still a little warmer than Iâd like for them but hopefully the purslaneâs helped the soil enough.#At least Iâll be home tomorrow to argue why my instruments shouldnât be thrown out.#Iâm just so tired#maybe Iâll wander and do some more intense PokĂ©mon Go than usual#I might see if I can up my output to fifty cranes a day while on vacation.#got ninety bucks to my name until Halloween after bills. so I guess Iâll use it to feed everyone and give myself something to do#this close to taking money out of the savings and buying an electric bike so at least I have more range on my wandering#but thatâs a thousand bucks or so and another argument about storage for it I guess#Iâm just really tired of not even having a room to myself I guess#hereâs to hoping in four months I have at least a place to stay and can empty the storage unit#the big dream at this point is just to have a place to set up my full library for the first time in years#and then be able to deal with the grief of going through everything and deciding what stays and what goes#itâs weird realizing some of those boxes Iâve been unable to open or even look at for a decade#because of yes. loss of a person#but also loss of the idea of the Dream Job I always wanted#and the realization that even if I went back to it now Iâd be making about the same amount but would be in debt from college#anyway. on Thursday I get to be a Jedi. I guess. for a day that means I get to be the teacher I always wanted to be.#barring that maybe yâall will like to gaze on my curry
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My extremely personal red flag is if youâve never lived independently.
Do not open tags itâs just a personal vent and I hit the tag limit (30) and thatâs never happened to me before ajskdlf
#like not even having to live alone I think living with roommates gets a similar enough experience#and this is a vague blog but not for someone on this site (of course)#plus it is entirely founded on deep jealousy but like#but like man. I donât wanna live with you if youâve never had to maintain your own life before! bc itâs not a magic thing that happens#Iâve been âon my ownâ for years at this point and I still struggle to keep my shit intact. maybe ur just That Good but tbh#I donât wanna live with That attitude either!#idk man. like. itâs food. itâs dishes. keeping the floors clean. the bathroom clean. making sure you donât run out of groceries or toiletry#itâs having a schedule of events around you. itâs being able to get places around you. itâs doing shit on ur own without friends#and again. Iâm being unduly harsh. lord knows theyâre better with their finances than me and that I had a spoiled ass childhood#the kind that spills into adulthood the way I refused to change my own car battery#I get that most of these things are there bc thereâs limited space and they wanna care for their family and have a nest egg before moving#and itâs impossible to be mad at them for that bc it makes too much sense to do it. Iâd do it if I got along better with my parents#idk. I feel like a shithead for not prioritizing them over other things in my life and it makes me defensive#bc I have to keep my life on track myself and at times it feels like they donât#and I got frustrated bc I was late to a meetup bc I had to cook dinner and their mom brings them dinner every other day#and again. I get it. god knows I get it. but I also feel frustrated#Iâd been considering a trip where we could see a national landmark but weâd have to drive two hours one way. and theyâre anxious driving#and like. one time their friends car was shitting itself but that friend still ended up driving. come on dude#it is spoiled kid syndrome and my personal hamartia and I could be infinitely more understanding but#I cannot fathom not going somewhere bc Iâm scared. if I want it that bad I figure it out. and sometimes itâs miserable but itâs done#and I cannot see a world where I live with someone too nervous to do things themself#urgh. I think they got into a bad wreck once when they were driving. idk. they mentioned it once in passing but I remembered them mentioning#I feel like a boomer haha.#whatâs the plan for the rest of ur life? it has to be finding someone who will take on these for you#maybe not. maybe theyâll actually grow and find ways to be a person by themself but uh. depending on a person changing is bad business#Iâm probably just a tightass. I couldnât handle a roommate on account of being a huge control freak anyway lol#itâs unrelated but Iâm sure I feel bad bc their other close friend (car shitting friend) is really good about this kind of stuff#driving them around covered food payments plus gifts vacations etc#hard not to feel like if I were more magnanimous this wouldnât be a problem. but Iâm not#and I shouldnât feel bad about it but I do? bc friend b is a total star and Iâm like. normal lol
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I don't know why I keep expecting people to be able to do their jobs but I am always proven wrong and I'm mildly having a full meltdown rn because I need documents sent very far away literally by the end of the month and based on when they said 1) the documents would be shipped (1-5 business days) and 2) the documents would be notarized (7-10 business days) it should have been done at least a full week ago but it's not and the document hasn't even been shipped to the notarization place and because I have nothing else to do at work right now and nothing to keep me distracted like I've been trying to hard to do for the past week I'm having a panic attack about this and I know I've called and emailed a combined five times already about this but I'm gonna have to call again to see where they're at because I don't think I'll last the weekend without some kind of update if I'm already having a panic attack today
#this shit keeps happening to me#people don't know how to do their fucking jobs#this is drudging up old shit now but#when i was 19 the therapist i worked with for a full year to get my top surgery letter of rec#moved to another state without saving a copy of my letter to my file so I had to find another therapist and start from scratch#the next therapist I worked with kept forgetting to send the LOR to the hospital so it took like six months to get to the hospital#I was finally placed on the waitlist only to find oht at my consultation that they put me on the wrong fucking waitlist#and I'd been scheduled with a surgeon who does bottom surgery and not top surgery#which even if I wanted I wouldn't have been able to get cause you need two letters for that#and the top surgerg waitlist is two years long and they said despite the fact that they fucked up they couldn't bump me up the list#and when i went to get my name changed it was supposed to take 4-6 weeks and I started calling after 8 weeks to see what was up#and for months I kept getting assholes who just told me to keep waiting#and when i finally got someone nice on the phone they told me it was rejected bc the judge couldn't read my handwriting#which I call bullshit on cause three separate people at thw courthouse read that document back to me just fine#but i had to go in person to get my records and resubmit my document#and it arrived later than they said it would and of course even though I had been checking the mail diligently every day for months#to make sure my parents didn't get the paperwork before I did#it arrived when I was on fucking vacation and my mom fucking got to it before me#and now bc of what I'm gonna be doing this upcoming school year it would be hard for me to keep working on my name change#when I absolutely could've gotten a large chunk of it done had it gotten done in that 4-6 week timeline months ago#and I'm losing my shit why does this keep happening why does everyone suck at their fucking job and why do I keep expecting them not to#anyway
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started playing Abzu on my switch, finally, after owning it for literal years, and while I have no idea what the fuck is going on in terms of the story (WHAT are the triangles that keep electrocuting me and what are all these temples) it is so beautiful and enthralling and has honestly been really helpful in my sadness that I havenât been able to swim or go to the beach or scuba dive in the past couple years
#shhh sharkie#I am going to the beach this year and will at least snorkel like thatâs a resolution and iâm determined#I havenât been swimming at all since before the pandemic and i MISS IT#even like I havenât been able to take a bath instead of a shower in so long i NEED to be fully underwater before this year is up#discussing with my person about trying to plan a vacation to somewhere we can go snorkeling/scuba diving so thatâs giving me a lot of hope#will satisfy my Urge To Submerge this year goddammit#anyway it feels like one of those games like Monument Valley that itâs just this simple but beautiful environment that you puzzle out#and I love seeing all of the different sea creatures!!#omg I just got to the diving with the whales bit and I was just so stricken it was beautiful#going down with the right whales and having the humpbacks pass you coming back up#and then the blue whales holy shit the camera zoom that shows you that you can only see their eye thatâs how big they are#and then the sperm whales and giant squid in The Deep too#itâs incredible what a wonderful game#serendipity i do think iâm experiencing it at a time that i needed something like this but still why did i wait so long to play#actually i know it was cause my joycons broke (fuck u nintendo) and the limited functions meant I couldnât actually play#and then I did get new off brand ones (that are much better) but was going through mental health hell cause broken knee#and didnât have the brain capacity to actually start a new game#ANYWAY itâs a beautiful game and I need to get into the ocean asap but in the meantime Iâm living vicariously through this game#still donât know what the fuck is going on with the actual story though#I just like finding the meditate spots#s2g the deep sea one is just obsessed with hatchetfish cause I kept going next and it was like ten in a row before I got something different
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...@ the rose release the rest of the dates for other countries so i can determine when i need to request pto
#honest to god i could... feasibly go to two........ one vvip and one vvvip if prices stay the same for europe#based on......well... yeah APPARENTLY automation is not a normal skill... bonus (also bonus is NEVER in my budget plans)#(my bonus has literally always been free money that i can do w/e i want with)#(so if that w/e happens to be....a two city vacation in europe to see the rose twice... hopefully it'll be that)#(now I REALLY REGRET not just doing atlanta last weekend tbh but BONUS IS NOT MONEY UNTIL IT'S PROMISED)#i feel like my review was like ADHD freak...repeatedly#it was like ''well she can reverse engineer any proceess and likes tinkering w/ things#BUT pls girlie... try to not interrupt ppl when u know the answer''#HEY if things stay the same with what our raises and bonuses have been#my fiance can have his girlboss malewife dreams (if his mom wasn't a psycho with ''traditional'' values he'd be perfect lol#like man has literally taken a pto day to batch make homemade dumplings cause i like them he's the best!!!!#i told him he's gotta save all his pto for our honeymoon next november tho like.... i have 2 more weeks than him)#BUT we're like in an okay position to be able to have kids....... and in a few years we'll probably be in the position where if#he wanted to he could be the sahp if we needed LOL#IDEAL#personal
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i love heavensward: a series of bulletin points
your last ally in all the city-states is an elf who would unironically lick the sweat from your armpits in front of the entire congregation. he begs his dad to let you couch surf. one of his brothers admits to your face that he wished you would die
two members of the swiss guard arrest your children so you punch them in the neck until the judge says you're free to go. the pope personally calls you to apologize for the trouble
ilberd tries and fails to hotbox you to death
a hot elf wife takes you on vacation to a nest full of cool bugs
anytime there's a serious moment estinien challenges the tone of the scene by pulling a giant novelty eyeball out of his pants which is played 100% straight every single time. not a single soul questions this or reacts in surprise
the prettiest elf in the world gets arrested trying to yell at his dad
Occupy The Vatican Right Fucking Now!!!!
the pope stances on the deck of an airship and flies away into the sunset after his eunuch traumatizes you
the emperor of garlemald shows up to call you a dipshit, leaves, and then you don't see him personally again for 1.5 expansion packs
we summon a naked catgirl and the first thing tataru does is give her a pair of louboutins and put a bow on her little kitty tail. she is the most deadly serious person in the entire organization
you take a quick detour to visit the angriest woman who's ever lived who calls you and everyone you're with a pointless dumbfuck moron shit idiot (affectionate). then she gives you a gun she invented that sharlayan banned for being too cool
theres a flying allagan war crimes factory full of broken robots who think you're stupid. an entire legion of garleans are abandoned here to form a feral colony with the escaped lab animals. the robots make fun of them
the dad of all the dragons on the whole planet calls you his favorite in front of his real child who he hasnt talked to in 4000 years
an evil wizard tries to get revenge on you for killing his cousin but the pope loads his soul into a bong and takes the fattest rip. the next time you meet him you mostly learn about how much his wife bullied him
estinien picks up a second eyeball. surprise development!: there is an angry dragon ghost living in the eyeballs
thancred gets punched in the face
you watch two dragon brothers fight because one called the other's dead wife a foul and trifling hoe
you save your friend through the power of friendship, and littering. as soon as he feels better he jumps out of a window and doesnt talk to you for two years
the guy from the box art wont stop trying to kill you because he is actually john videogames: astral traveler
after 15 hours of wondering what happened to all the scions and learning just the ones you've been able to FIND were flung into the afterlife, you discover lyse and papalymo are fine. they werent even hurt. they have been playing desert dress up with the ala mhigans while youve been freezing your pussy off trying to end a multigenerational religious war with the dragons and depose a corrupt head of state. they tried to send one letter and then gave up
the consequences of littering catch up with you. in eorzea, the fine is $Giant Dragon
#ffxiv#it's not my favorite expack#but it is the funniest expack#every day i wake up and give it a little smooch#text post#heavensward spoilers#endwalker spoilers
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I've been following what's been going on with Belphie the kitten and his person, Greer Stothers, has just mentioned pet insurance in a tag on a post and I wanted to give an example from my life backing up why pet insurance can be a good idea and why I think it is worthwhile.
Two years ago my sister's dog had bloat while she was on vacation. The kennel he was staying at recognized symptoms and called my sister to clear them to take him to the emergency vet. My sister is very financially secure and this dog is an enormous part of her life, so she said yes with barely a moment of hesitation. That ended up being about twelve thousand dollars of emergency surgery.
Large Bastard and I got pet insurance for Tiny Bastard the same week because we realized that if someone had presented that option to us, we would have had no choice but to have Tiny Bastard put down, and we didn't want to be put in that position.
I did a lot of research about different kinds of pet insurance and different levels of coverage and annual maximums and deductibles and so on and so forth. Tiny Bastard is a senior dog, so this was going to be expensive no matter what options we went with, so I chose a moderately priced plan with a $500 annual deductible, unlimited annual coverage, that pays 80% of the bills incurred annually below the maximum. What that means is that we pay the first $500 of care totally out of pocket, after which point we are reimbursed 80% of any vet bills for care covered by the plan.
The first year we had this plan I was kind of iffy about it. It's a noticeable monthly expense and we didn't even spend the deductible in vet bills the first year. Except that a month before the policy was set to renew, Tiny Bastard got diagnosed with diabetes. We now have monthly insulin costs and syringe costs; there are tests she has to have regularly to monitor her overall condition and we need to do more frequent vet visits to track symptoms.
Suddenly the insulin alone means that the insurance is break-even within six months and the additional visits and tests are something we can afford instead of something we'd have to put on credit.
Our plan (through ManyPets) covers medication, surgery, diagnostics, medical equipment, and euthanasia and cremation. It doesn't cover pre-existing conditions, joint conditions for dogs who were signed up over a certain age, dental care, spay/neuter, vaccinations, or prescription food but honestly all of that makes me just kind of wish we'd signed her up earlier - her knee problems *would* be covered if we'd had her signed up as a puppy, and the monthly cost would have been lower if we'd signed her up then. And there are at least a few emergency vet bills that I wouldn't still be paying off on my credit card. Hell, I've probably paid more in interest on some bruising she got in a fight three years ago than I have for this policy as a whole.
I am glad that Greer is able to take care of Belphie. I am glad that my sister was able to take care of her dog. But I'm also really, really glad that for a relatively low cost, I would be able to take care of Tiny Bastard if she were catastrophically injured, or if she needed emergency surgery. I'm glad that I'm able to take care of her now with her medications and her additional vet visits.
There are a lot of people who say that pet insurance isn't worth it, especially not for young animals. But if your young animal gets very sick, or gets badly injured, or eats a hairband and needs an emergency endoscopy, then it will probably be VERY worth it. It's a risk/reward question. You feel like you're wasting money if you're paying for a policy that you never use, but honestly that just means you're lucky to have a healthy pet.
I'm lucky that Tiny Bastard was relatively healthy before I got the insurance; I'm also lucky that she was insured when she was diagnosed with a chronic illness that will need lifelong care. This enables me to provide care for her that would otherwise be financially unmanageable, and that makes the insurance *extremely worth it* from my perspective.
And Belphie is a good example of why it's a good idea to get coverage even for very young pets. Greer is recommending it because this kitten has required a tremendous amount of care during a period in his life when it's generally taken for granted that a cat will be healthy. (And Greer is not stupid for forgoing pet insurance - pet insurance is still a relatively new concept and there are lots of people who are leery of it for a number of good reasons)
So I'd say that if you've got a pet or are getting a pet it is very worthwhile to find a pet insurance plan that fits in your budget. There are a variety of plans out there and some are very inexpensive. Check coverage levels (you can even get some with wellness plans that include dental care and vaccinations) and see if there's something that works for you.
I personally don't think I'm ever going to own another pet without having pet insurance. It's ridiculous how much easier it is for me to say yes to diagnostic tests or different treatments than it was before because I know I'm going to be able to fit Tiny Bastard's care into our budget.
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Dress
Hellooo. Here is a best friends sister sorta request- h is best friends with your brother đ and heâs tired of hiding đ I think this is a one off, maybe a two off if Iâm feeling spicy.
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Words- 3k
Warnings- exhibitionism(donât do stuff in public pls), dirty talk, soft dom!h, slight angst, slight mention of violence, people pleasing tendencies, etc etc etc
âââ
"I just wish things were different. I wish we didn't have to hide. I wish your brother knew about us. This sneaking around shit⊠itâs getting old. I donât like having to pretend you arenât the only fuckinâ thing Iâm thinking about."
âI knowâŠâ The dark corner of the club was their solace. The humid air from the sea breeze leaked into the club around them and overly loud and slightly dated music being the unlikely reprove to having to keep up appearances through the last few days. Harryâs family always came with them on this vacation out to the islands and it used to be hell on earth. Each year she had tried her hardest to tamper down her crush, but now she didnât have to.
Well, not unless their families were around.
With her brother in his own room, Harry had volunteered to take Y/N out as a âchaperoneâ of sorts and in turn, gave her a real taste of what it would be like if they didnât have to hide their relationship- but she wasnât exactly ready for the explosive way she knew her brother would react. He took things incredibly personally sometimes, but she was doing her best to try and not let it scare her too much. Harry was right- it was getting old. incredibly so, but it was hard to let go of her peacemaker mentality. Sheâd adopted it her whole life to keep the peace, diffuse situations, and now that she had finally found happiness with someone- it happened to be the one person that she knew he was going to freak out over.
âWe need to tell him eventually, I know that. But I justâŠâ Her fingers tangled in his necklaces, the alcohol making it easier to be emotionally vulnerable for once. âI donât want to ruin it. Donât want him to scare you away.â
Harry's heart ached as he looked at Y/N. He knew she was right, but the thought of hiding their relationship made him feel sick. Tired, even. He didnât like having to watch his hands, where he was looking. He should be able to room with his girlfriend. It wasnât like their parents hadnât been rooting for it for ages, but he tried to understand where she was coming from.
Maybe it was a bit of the rose colored glasses keeping him from seeing what she did, but he didnât feel the need to valiantly protect her brother from the knowledge that he was dating her. "I don't want to hide either, darling." He said softly. âMânot going to let anything come between us, especially not him." His hand slid up her thigh, wrapping around to the back of it and flexing his fingers.
"Your brother might piss me off when finds out, but only because he's probably, definitely going hit me. I'm not going anywhere, Y/N. I promise you that." His face grew more serious. "I donât know how to make you understand that I am not afraid of him. Iâve been his mate for years. I know what heâs like but respectfully, heâs going to need to get over it and realize that I only have the best intentions..."
âI know.â She repeated, the humid air hitting her neck as she pushed bed hair off her shoulder, craning it to look up at him. It was unfair how handsome he was, with his curls sticking to his forehead and the back of his neck and the light shadow of facial hair since he had missed shaving yesterday. âI just⊠I know itâs selfish, but I want to spend tonight imagining he already knows and we donât have to worry about anything. That no one would be all⊠shocked or even say anything if I do this.â Leaning up, she lightly pressed her lips against his in a chaste kiss before settling back on her feet, lips slowly separating. Harry made no move to pull away from her. If anything, he followed.
Harry's eyes shifted as he watched her, his heart picking in his chest. He loved the way she thought, the way she imagined a world where they didn't have to hide. Never once did he imagine himself to be one of those lovesick fuckers, but here he was again. Swooning over a goddamn kiss.
But really, who could blame him? He loved the way she kissed him, all soft and sweet and so damn gentle, like she was still a little hesitant he would say no even though theyâd kissed dozens and dozens of times- stolen them right under everyoneâs noses. As if he could ever say no- his body wouldnât ever allow that. It was all greedy for her, had no capacity, no ability to deny her if anything when it came to telling his girl no. "Then let's imagine.â
Sinewy arms wrapped around her waist as he pulled her back into their hidden corner, the music pumping around them and his body hiding her from the crowd.. "Let's imagine that your brother knows and he's okay with it. That he's even happy for us." He pressed his lips to her neck, kissing and nipping at her skin. âA little grossed out, because I think that you are⊠the most beautiful, incredible, sweet woman Iâve ever had the privilege of knowing⊠but that would only be the truth.â
âYou really think that about me?â Her voice spoke solely to him. In their seclusion, people were still passing by, but no one paid attention. No one cared. To the rest of them, it looked like a young couple too loved up to keep hands off of each other. In most ways, that was the truth. Who knew invisibility could be such a gift at times?
Harry chuckled against her throat, his breath hot on her sticky skin. She smelled like sunscreen and that tequila sunrise she had accidentally splashed on herself, so a bit of orange juice and grenadine. Edible, summer, he wanted to sink into her and melt. "Of course I do." The man scoffed, his hands slowly roaming over her body as if he couldn't help himself. "And if your brother knew about us, I'd tell him exactly that. That I want you⊠and I want tâmake you my girl properly. But thatâs probably where it would stop, because I think heâd want to kill me if he knew what ran through my head when I get to see you.â Harry knew it was a good thing he wasnât a mind reader, and that theyâd gotten away with it for a bit so far. Yeah, heâd be taking a punch because he knew how Harryâs mind worked but he didnât know that he fucking loved her- that this shit was different.
âWell⊠since weâre pretending all is right in the world right nowâŠâ Her hands splayed across his chest, chin tilted up as he pulled away from her throat. Starry eyes glazed over in love peering up just at him, not knowing she was the one he was orbiting. âWhy donât you enlighten me on the things you wouldnât tell him?â
Harry's eyes glinted with amusement as he looked at her. "You really want to know, sweets?" He crooned, his voice low and sultry. "Alright then." His hands tightened around her waist, pulling her flush against him so she could feel just how much he wanted her.
"First... I'd never tell him that I think about you all the time. Like... right now, I'm imagining wrapping your legs around my waist and backing you up against that wall over there." His eyes flicked to the wall behind her before meeting her gaze again. "And how bad I want tâkiss you until you barely have any breath, make you borrow some of mine."
Y/N felt her breathing pick up, ironically enough, feeling trapped in the best way. Whenever Harry was around her she sort of wanted him to smother her, in a weird sort of way. it was hard to explain but close never felt close enough. Harry just had this sort of⊠way about him that had her itching to get close and bask in his own kind of warmth. It soothed her bones.
"Nâthen once you caught up, I'd keep kissing you until you were panting, so that cute little giggle that turns into that sexy moan that you do. Fuckinâ love that." he continued, his voice growing deeper as he showed little restraint with his words. It was easy to forget where they were when he got started. "And then... " He trailed off, leaning in to kiss her neck again, his breath hot against her skin. "Well, I probably shouldn't tell you the rest."
âTell me.â She whined, in a way only tipsy Y/N wouldnât feel shame for. âPlease, baby?â Something sheâd noticed was how strongly he did react to those little pet names so she kept them sparse, but seeing how he reacted always acted as a reward. âYou can tell me. I want to know.â
He groaned low in his throat at the nickname, nipping at her earlobe before whispering to her the rest of the details he had been keeping away, waiting for the coaxing she had to pry out of him. "I'd slide my hand up your pretty little skirt and underneath your panties, feel how wet you already are for me. Slip a finger inside, nice nâslow at first, until you start to rock against my hand."
âYeah? In front of all these people?â She was slightly shocked- but slightly not. Seeing as Harry had really struggled with not being able to publicly show her affection, she should have guessed heâd be handsy in all scenarios if he has the full permission- but this was more than she had anticipated. Even more so⊠She liked it.
"Mhm..." Harry agreed, his hands slowly sliding up her thighs, bunching the hem of her skirt as his hands went underneath without a second thought. "And if you kept making those little noises like you do when I touch you, no one would even notice."
Y/N she didnât always make the best decisions but she knew she wouldnât regret anything with Harry. As cocky as the man could be, as arrogant as he may appear, getting to know him up close and personal the last few months that theyâd evolved into more than what they were⊠she knew he was a good guy. He was the type of guy she wanted. If he wasnât, she wouldnât be risking the peace her life had for it.
But no one ever said she wasnât impulsive. âIt is loud in here.â His body did hide hers in the corner, making it easy to be bolder. âSo you should put your money where you mouth is, and touch me.â
"Oh, I plan on it" Harry said, a smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. He didn't waste any time in sliding his hand fully up her skirt, his fingers brushing against her skin as he made his way underneath her panties. His pace was careful, his touch light as he slowly slid a finger inside of her. Then soft hitch of her breath made him hum felt her bury her face in his chest to muffle any noise she might make. All talk, his girl, but he didnât care too much- not when he felt that slick hole around his digit after being essentially edged all week. He continued to slowly pump his finger in and out, his thumb gently circling her puffy clit.
Biting his lip as he felt her clench around him, he could feel himself grow harder at the thought of being the one to make her feel like this. He added another finger, still moving slowly but picking up the pace slightly. "I want to take you out, show you off. I'm so tired of hiding you." Harry whispered in her ear, his breath hot against her skin. He pressed a kiss to her temple as he continued to move his fingers inside of her. "I want everyone to know that you're mine. Donât want to have tâsneak off in vacation just to play with my girlâs cunt. Shouldâve been making you cum the whole time." Harry's other hand came up to tangle his fingers in her hair, pulling her head back so he could kiss her properly. His eager tongue slipped into her mouth as he continued to move his fingers inside of her, feeling her wetness coat his fingers.
She was clinging to him, her nails digging into his arms as she tried to keep quiet. Her breath was coming in short gasps, her chest rising and falling rapidly. Face buried in his neck, her teeth sank into his skin to muffle her moans as he felt her shake against him. Y/N had never dabbled in public play before, and she knew no one could see, but the thrill of it all had her more wet than she had anticipated. Sure, the girl talked big game but she didnât know what she would do if she had actually got caught being touched like this. Add in the fact that Harryâs tank top hugged him perfectly, his tattoos contrasting his skin, the broad shoulders and brush of his facial hair against her sensitive skin had her feeling drunk.
âThat feels so fucking good.â She mewled, unsure if she wanted his mouth to keep her quiet or his chest.
"Shh..." Harry hushed her, his voice low and warning. "You have to be quiet, baby. Know itâs loud but yâdonât want anyone tâhear you." As much as he liked that idea, he knew his girl. That was something theyâd need to work up to. Just feeling her dripping down his knuckles as he fingerfucked her was shocking enough, so he was more than pleased with this. His face nuzzled against her neck, his stubble scratching her sensitive skin. "Wrap your arms around my neck. Lean back against the wall."
Putting her trust in him was easy, or maybe it was the pent up sexual tension she hadnât been able to release all trip as she did as he asked. The position made it look like a couple drunkenly making out, but his hand angled the farthest from the dancing drunk crowd was working slowly under her skirt.
Harry took advantage of her new position, his fingers slowly sliding in and out of her as his thumb continued to rub against her center. He felt her squirm against him, her arms tightening around his neck as she buried her face in his chest once more to muffle her moans. "Good girl... keepinâ so quiet for me... " He praised, his fingers picking up pace as he fought to keep himself calm. He glanced around quickly, making sure no one was paying attention to them, before he gently tugged her leg up, resting it on his hip.
The man had been good this whole trip. Heâd played by her rules, trying his best to keep prolonged eye contact to a minimum, not leaning into her too much, not touching her, trying to act as he had in the past- but it was borderline impossible. Not with the way he felt about her. He wanted to rub all over her like a cat, wanted to wake up with her in the pretty room with the balcony and be the one to order her morning coffee. He was so tired of being good. In all honesty, the man didnât care who found out anymore, not when being with her felt like this. Her little cunt gushing over his digits, dripping down the back of his hand as he curled his fingers just so.
"You're soaking through to my wrist..." Harry growled lowly, his other arm banded around her waist to keep her upright as her knees grew weak. He could feel her tensing up, her breath hitching as her body grew warmer. "Want you tâlet go for me, love..." He curled his fingers one more time, pressing against her spot over and over as he rubbed his thumb in tight circles over her clit. Her whole body shuddered against him, her legs trembling as she tried to hold herself up. "Youâre right there, baby. Can feel it. Let it go for me, my sweet girl... "
Harry buried his face in her hair as he felt her clamp down around his fingers, her body trembling slightly as she came silently against his hand. Her nails dug painfully into his shoulders as she bit down on his chest to keep quiet, her whimper muffled against his skin as she rode out her high. He held her leg tightly against his hip, his arm around her waist the only thing keeping her upright as her body shook with her orgasm. His fingers remained buried inside her, his fingertips gently stroking against her spot as he kept her on edge, prolonging her orgasm the best he could.
Pulling her face up, he dragged her mouth back to his. Their kiss was sloppy and desperate, Harry's tongue pushing into her mouth as he devoured her whimpers, groaning in response as he felt her cunt clenching rhythmically around his fingers. One of his favorite feelings, his favorite tastes. The only ways it could be better would be with his tongue on her clit or his cock inside of her. His hand shifted, tangling in her hair, holding her head still as he ate at her mouth, swallowing her noises as he kept his fingers buried inside her trembling pussy.
"Shh, baby... I've got you... " Harry cooed, his voice low as he gently worked her down. Slowly removing his fingers, he brought them to his mouth and licked her taste off of them before he lowered her leg back down to the ground.
âWeâre telling him. Tomorrow.â He mumbled, wiping his spit soaked fingers on his shorts. âIâm not spending the rest of this trip with you not in my bed because heâs gonna have a fuckinâ tantrum. Heâll get it over, baby.â
Looking down at her, his eyes softened significantly as he gazed at her flushed face and messy hair. "You're staying in my bed tonight. Iâve gone long enough without it. Everything else, weâll figure out in the morning."
#jarofstyles#harry styles one shot#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fanfic#harry styles smut#harry writing#harry styles imagine#harry drabble#harry styles blurb#harry styles writing#harry styles au#harry styles fic#harry styles fanfics#harry styles fanfictions#harry smut#harry fluff#harry angst#harry styles fluff#harry styles angst#bbf#brothers best friend
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đđšđđđąđšđŹđ
Paring: Rio Vidal x Reader
Summary: The only person who could ruin a vacation in Italy was your stepmother, but what if she made it unexpectedly better?
A/N: Okay, so this was inspired by the second season of White Lotus and the title is in italian because I thought the english word was too crude.
I hope this isnât too OOC, let me know!
This isnât beta read and english isnât my mother language, so bear with me.
Warnings: Face slapping, non-consensual spanking, dubious consent, unwanted arousal, degradation kink, face sitting.
I hope I didnât leave anything behind, but if I did let me know.
Word count: 3.1k
Date: Nov 05, 2024
Comments and constructive criticism are always welcome!
Masterlist
Tag list: @jmkjournalblog @thecavalrywife @yourbasicqueerie @polaris-likethestar @riosslut @maevaofendora @yippie-kai-gay @w1theredroz3
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The sun shines through the blowing white curtains and into the bedroom. The last few days in Sicily were cloudy, and as pleasant as they had been, youâve been longing for a day at the beach. The weather today was perfect for spending time in a bikini and staying at the hotel, not visiting any tourist spots or museums.
Italy is breathtaking. College was wearing you out, so spending a few weeks away from the student mentality is doing you good, it also helps that your father is paying for everything, even if it doesnât erase the complicated relationship you two had.
Waking up early is mandatory in every vacation and today was especially easy. As soon as you had taken a peek at the open window of your room, you got out of bed. The constant tiredness you felt from your routine had vanished a few days into the city, and you were excited to make the most of it.
Skin glistening with sunscreen, you head downstairs for breakfast. The buffet was set up on a covered balcony with the chairs outside, where you could enjoy the view of the italian architecture as you ate. Grabbing a few fruits and a spoonful of eggs, you head out to find an empty table, only to catch sight of your fatherâs raised arm moving left and right to get your attention.
This vacation would be perfect if it werenât for them.Â
âGood morning.â You say, settling on one of the chairs.
Your greeting goes unanswered. Your father is back on his phone and your stepmother gives you a mouth pressed smile, doesnât bother pretending she likes you. Every time you were in their presence, you felt like throwing up. Besides the fact that your father is 30 years older than her, you still hate both of them for the affair they had while your parents were together.Â
Youâve always known your father was an asshole, but adultery was the final straw. The only reason you kept in contact with him was because of your mother. The saint she was, begged you to not distance yourself from him, scared you would be alone when she was gone, and how could you not grant a dying womanâs wish?
Rio was a cunt, but you couldn't deny that she was attractive. Your father wanting to stay with her wasn't a huge surprise. It was pretty clear, though, that the feeling wasnât reciprocated. She was obviously with him for the money, and you were pretty sure she was cheating on him. Karma is a bitch, after all, and your dadâs time has finally come.Â
Eating your meal slowly, you enjoy the light breeze blowing your hair back. Cargo navy blue shorts and an open white button shirt hide away your black bikini and when you stretch your arms up, you feel eyes on you. Turning towards your stepmother, youâre greeted with sunglasses covered eyes and a similar blouse to yours, her brown hair is down.Â
âI have to get some work done, so I wonât be able to spend the day with you.â Your father tells you, finally looking up from the phone.
âThatâs fine.â You reply, shoving a spoonful of papaya into you mouthÂ
Oh, thank goodness you wouldn't have to stay with them today.Â
âRio will go to the beach with you, though.âÂ
Your eye twitch at that. Glancing in her direction, you see her tongue poking into her cheek and a side smile, clearly enjoying your suffering.Â
âIâm sure she would like to do something else. â You try.Â
âNo, no. I want you to spend time together, get to know each other.â Your father and his need to make you two close, this whole trip was all about that and yet you still avoid her like you have done all these years. Youâve never wanted any kind of relationship with her and that wasnât about to change.Â
âWhatever.â You breathe out.Â
âCome up to our room. Rio needs to change and I can give you girls some cash to go out and buy a few clothes.â Yeah, that wasn't going to happen. Spending as much time away from her as possible was one of your goals in this vacation.
He leaves his uneaten breakfast on the table and gets up.Â
âFine.â You concede.Â
In the hallway, they walk ahead of you and you take a moment to watch them. Your father moves with the confidence of a rich white man with a plastic filled face. Heâs in his 70's and doesnât have the worst body, but if Rio was putting up with him because of money, it must be torture. She was clearly above his level, with black hair, slim body and defined arms. Anyone could see that. She had a powerful aura and walked with a sway to her hips.Â
You look up when you realize youâre staring at her ass.Â
The white door opens up with your dad's key card. Their bedroom is huge. The entrance leads to a living room with two couches and a coffee table. At the parallel wall to the entry, a large door opens to a balcony with a beautiful view of the mountains, the water constantly crashing against the rocks. Their bed is on the left side and is separated by a bow shaped wall, the other side of the room is the bathroom. It has a big counter with multiple beauty products.Â
âIâm off. Thereâs a computer room downstairs, if anyone needs me, Iâll be there.â He hands you three hundred dollars and goes to kiss Rio.Â
He holds her waist firmly and she turns her head before his lips contact with hers. She pushes him slightly back and pat his shoulders, you hold in your laugh.Â
âOkay then.â He mutters embarrassed, ruffling your hair on his way out.
It doesnât take 10 seconds after he leaves for you to turn to her and say. âLook, we donât have to do this. I donât want to spend time with you and Iâm sure the sentiment is mutual.âÂ
She fake gasps at you, eyebrows raised and smirks. âYouâre gonna hurt my feelings.âÂ
Rolling your eyes, you head to the bathroom to wash your hands, they feel sticky after eating the fruits from breakfast. You hear some movement in the bedroom and assume Rio is grabbing her bikini. The wardrobe door closes shut and you glance up in the mirror to watch your stepmother's figure walking behind you. Youâre one step away from moving out of the restroom when she slips her blouse and shorts off.Â
Time seems to stop as you watch her with her back to you, her ass is completely bare and you stare as she first ties the top knots of the two-piece. She bends to pull up the bottoms and you look down to your hands, your breath comes out shallowly, the image buried into your mind.
âBoo.â A voice says, her breath ghosts your ear and you try to hide your startlement.Â
Looking up, you purse your lips. Sheâs standing a foot behind you and smiles smugly in your direction. When you turn around, her face is closer than you expected.
âWhat do you want?â You ask sharply.
âWhat do I want?â She repeats slowly, her fingers running through your hair ends. âYou tell me.â She stares into your eyes and you squint, grabbing her shoulder and pushing her back.
âFuck off.â You let out an incredulous laugh. âI always knew you were a whore, but this is beyond anything Iâd have expected.âÂ
âWhy? Are you still mad at me because of mommy?â She teases with a fake pout.Â
Your entire face closes off and you take a step towards her.Â
âDonât talk about my mother. You could never be half of the woman she was.âÂ
âOh, yeah? Your father would disagree.âÂ
The reaction is instantaneous. Your palm stings from the contact and you gape at her, surprised at your own slap. With your hand frozen in midair, you observe as her head turns back in your direction, her cheek is stained by red fingers and she lets out a breathy laugh, running her digits through it.Â
âYou are gonna regret that.âÂ
The apology that was about to come out of your mouth is cut off by the yank on your scalp, your body is forcefully rotated towards the sink and you hold the impact with your palms. The tug in your hair makes your back bend in an uncomfortable way and your neck aches as itâs pulled back. Rio pressed firmly against your arched ass and rested her chin on your shoulder, looking at your startled face through the reflection. Her nails sink in your flesh.
âWhat are you doing?â You breathe out, partially scared and slightly aroused.Â
âHas anyones ever told you that youâre a brat?â She avoids your question with one with her own, you feel fingers running down your waist.Â
âHas anyone ever told you?â You return.Â
She scoffs as her mouth breaks into a grin, shaking her head left and right. The digits you felt moving through your covered skin grip you with full force and move to the front of your shorts, unbuttoning it. Panic flashes in your eyes as she pushes it down. You struggle against her hold and she pulls your hair harder.Â
âDonât fight it, sweetheart.âÂ
Breath catches in your throat when her fingers grab a handful of your bare ass.Â
âDo you know how I tame a brat?â She whispers in your ear and answers her own question. âI teach her a lesson.âÂ
The sound of her palm colliding with your backside echoes off the white walls and your surprised yelp follows it. The slap doesnât hurt, you could bet Rio didnât put all her strength into it, the worst part, for sure, is that it felt good. The sting brings a delicious burn to your skin and you prevent yourself from asking for more.
The second time it happens, you grab harder into the counter. Words seem to fail you and you stand still, this whole thing feels like a fever dream. You look up at the mirror and see Rioâs eyes completely fixated on your ass, she smoothes her hands through it and you shudder.Â
The one that follows is firmer and you groan, unable to contain yourself. Goosebumps mark your skin and your body reacts to the pain, shifting uncomfortably against your bikini.
âWhat? Cat got your tongue?â She asks, raising her brows and giving you a maniac grin.
âFuck you.âÂ
She âtsksâ behind you and hums, slapping you three times in a row. The reaction is instantaneous and you hate yourself for pushing your ass back against her.Â
âWhoâs the whore now?â She asks in your ear and laughs.Â
The taunting worsens your condition. Slick gathers in your underwear and you bite your lips, stressed by the way your body is reacting to your step mother. She doesnât give you any type of relief and smacks you two more times. This torture seems to be going on forever, but youâve only counted seven slaps. You had no idea how long it would last.
Youâre about to speak when she strikes you one more time, with an open mouth, you arenât able to contain the moan that escapes you and your face lights up like a christmas tree.
âYou are so cute when you blush, sweetheart.â She tells you and licks your ear, her palm massages your sore butt and she adds. âEverytime we meet, I just want to have you all to myself.â She pulls back and looks at your pitiful position. Arched back, red ass and shorts bunched up mid-thigh, she runs tongue over her teeth. âWhen I saw the opportunity today, I just knew I had to take it. Itâs so easy to rile you up and the fact that you hate me only makes it all the more delicious.â You shudder at her words.Â
She is fucking mental.Â
She surprises you for a second time with a spank. Tears well up in your eyes, the sting is worse than before and your arousal is burning you up from inside. The whole situation is making you dizzy, you feel like youâd fall down if Rio wasnât holding you so tightly. Your neck hurts and you almost beg her to stop, but you couldnât handle the humiliation, so you face it like a big girl.Â
She delivers two more and you screw your eyes shut. One tear runs down your face and you feel Rio releasing the grip on your hair, turning you around to face her.Â
âTen slaps, thatâs all. No need to cry.â She runs her thumb over your wet cheek.Â
The sink presses against your backside and the cold of it helps with the burn, with your eyes still closed, you take a deep breath. Youâre still in shock.Â
âDid you learn your lesson?â She asks, her palms holding your wrist against your breasts.Â
You stare at her for a second. Laughing at her smirk, you spit right in her face. She closes her eyes, whipping the dripping saliva with her fingers. Her entire face closes off, her patience seems to have run thin.Â
She doesnât say anything else, turns around and pulls you by the forearm. You struggle against her hold, but sheâs stronger than you expected. Losing your balance when she throws you on the mattress, you donât have time to get up before sheâs upon you, holding your wrist above your head and kissing you roughly.
You hate yourself for it, but it doesnât take 5 seconds for you to kiss her back. Sheâs in full control of the kiss and you writhe beneath her, failing to release your arms. Her tongue runs against yours and you can barely breathe from the intensity, your head spinning.Â
One of her hands runs down your side to the bikini bottom.Â
You suck in a breath when she separates.Â
âI could eat you alive in this, couldnât take my eyes off you at breakfast.â She tells you, licking your cheek.Â
Her hand brushes the black fabric before pushing it aside, you are embarrassed by your state. Her fingers run through your wet folds, circling your entrance as you whine, desperate to be fucked.
âYou are pathetic.â She says close to your face.Â
Fuck your body for reacting the way it shouldnât. The degradation turns you on even more and you feel your resolve crumbling. Rio chuckles at the intern battle she sees in your eyes.Â
âDonât worry, you wonât have to use that pretty little head of yours for long.âÂ
She rolls off of you. The opportunity to escape presents itself and you donât move an inch, with your wetness sticking to your thighs, you just want Rio to have her way with you. She smirks at you and crawls up your body until sheâs stradling your ribs.Â
She doesn't put her full weight on you as she squeezes your cheeks and says. âLetâs see if this mouth is good for anything other than being disrespectful.â
You barely have time to understand the implication before her cunt completely shadows your vision. Her bikini is set aside and she pushes her hips down, making you grip her thighs in an attempt to control her pace. Giving up on your moral high ground, you lick a stripe up her lower lips. She hums on top of you and grinds down, her juices smear on your chin and youâve only just begun. Apparently you werenât the only one affected by the spanking.
Focusing your attention elsewhere, you leave a hard bite on her inner thigh, taking your hatred on her skin. She moans and sits completely on your face, making it impossible to breathe.Â
âYou better get to work, sweetheart.â She mocks you and amends. âBefore you pass out.â
You fully believe sheâd let that happen so with renewed energy, you grab into her butt and grind her center against your face. Your tongue circles her entrance before going in. Hearing her hand grab the headboard, you begin to move in and out. Your pace is rapid and she seems to enjoy it as she starts to ride your face. Sucking her lower lips makes her groan on top of you, so you repeat the motion and squeeze a handful of her ass, making her moan.Â
With little breath, you stick your tongue out and let her chase her own orgasm. She slowly moves in circular motion and spreads her juices around your face. Her movement picks up speed and within seconds sheâs bouncing against your mouth. You grip her ass tightly and feel your nose bumping against her clit.Â
She becomes a moaning mess on top of you.Â
For someone who canât breathe, however, eternity seems to pass as you struggle to keep up with her. She is clearly on the edge and trying to reach her peak, so, in a last attempt to get her off of you, you run your tongue all the way up before sucking her clit as hard as you can.Â
Her movement comes to a halt and you feel her body tensing up, her thighs tighten around your head and your ears ring from the pressure. Her orgasm finally hits and she shudders on top of you, breathing heavily and letting out unrestrained moans.Â
She collapses beside you and you take the biggest gulp of air you can manage. Your breathing is as ragged as hers and you curse yourself for having a weakness for older women, this shouldn't have happened.Â
Silence befalls you for about a minute as Rio gathers herself and you contemplate your life choices. As soon as her breathing is slower, she gets up on her knees in the bed. All your previous worries leave your mind as soon as sheâs back upon you, straddling your waist and biting her lips.
She kisses you and grasps the wrists that hold her face, you press your center against hers and let out a whine when she pulls back and gets out of the bed. With a puzzled face, you sit up and ask.
âWhere are you going?âÂ
âTo the beach.â She simply says, grabbing a sun hat and putting it on.Â
âWhat?â You rapidly blink.
âYou heard me.â Her face breaks into the biggest grin youâve ever seen in her sulking face.Â
âRio.â You whine like a petulant child.Â
She comes towards you and gives you a long peck. Your mouth follows hers as she pulls away.
âBrats donât get rewards.â She states and heads for the door, exiting the room with a witchy cackle as you throw yourself back onto the bed.Â
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Lucifer with an artist reader
ă»â„ Youâre hosting an art class, and the nude model is someone you never expected
| Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 |
xx: itâs a long one yâall đ weâre still in the pre-dating era! Slowburn, anybody? Forget the crumbs, have the whole loaf of bread, my swans âșïž
warning: brief mentions of nudity & mild swearing
After Luciferâs initial tour of the hotel, he started coming around much more often.
He was beginning to reconcile with his daughter, and that meant making up for all the years he had missed out due to his self-isolation.
When Lucifer came to the hotel for Charlie, he always made time for you.
At first, when you had still been busy working away at the paintings for the hotel, he had used the excuse that he was just coming over simply to âadmire the art.â
Nevermind that he crossed the entire hotel just to look at some paintings, but you never pried him about it. Youâd be lying if you said you werenât waiting in anticipation for his visits.
Sometimes, he would lean against the door frame in silence, watching as your brush glided across the surface of the canvas. He dared not to disturb you while you worked. Too afraid heâd cause you to slip up and place your brush in the wrong spot, ruining your piece.
He never would admit it, but the soft, feather-like strokes you made always seemed to lull him into a state of tranquil bliss.
If he had the opportunity to sit there for hours and watch you paint, heâd probably drift off into a peaceful sleep.
It was ASMR for the King of Hell.
You werenât always sure whether he was admiring the painting, or you. You were too concentrated on making a leaf of a tree, or the surface of the water just right to trace his gaze.
Youâd think with Lucifer being the embodiment of pride and his rank as ruler of the realm, heâd have demanded your attention instantly.
Instead, it was you who usually spoke first. âAre you going to sit down?â Youâd tease with a warm smile, greeting him with a bat of your eyelashes as you soaked your brush with fresh paint.
âOf course, I just wanted to see your progress, itâs looks beautiful as always.â
You had hummed a thanks as he strode over to the flat cushion in the middle of the room, and collapsed in it. He had now claimed it as his personal spot ever since he had first used it when you let him use his wings for reference.
Every time he made himself comfortable, he would exhale a large sigh of relief, like he just walked out of a noisy and over-stimulating circus show.
His tolerance for people in general was still pretty dicey, but here, in the quiet corner of the hotel, he could reset his mind.
And with you there? He didnât feel so lonely. Even in your silence, your presence and the multitude of large paintings leaning against the walls was all he needed to keep his mind from drifting off into darker thoughts.
âBoy, do you work fast. I canât imagine what Hell would like if you were the one running things.â
âProbably terrible,â You had laughed, âI may be able to create art under time constraints, but the pressure of an entire realm on my shoulders? Weâll let the super-powerful-fallen-angel deal with that.â
âThere goes my vacation,â He had sighed dramatically.
Sometimes, heâd catch you humming to an ancient tune, and every time heâd ask you about it.
âWhat song is this?â Heâd ask, genuine interest lacing his voice.
âInnsbruck, ich muss dich lassenâ
âIâm not even going to pretend to know what that meansâ
â âInnsbruck, I must leave theeâ ,â youâd laugh, âItâs a German song and is, you guessed it, from the Renaissance.â
âOh, right. Germany. Yeah, they were our biggest influx of souls back in the early 1900s,â He replied, âMustâve been fun people.â
You shook your head at that. Right, âFunâ, that was a rather.. surface-level take on what that country had gotten into during that period of time.
âYou should tell me more about the Renaissance.â Heâd ask with puppy-dog eyes, which always made you set down your brush and turn to him. A content smile spreading across your face.
Your knowledge of such a time always intrigued him, the Renaissance as a whole did. For so long, he had desperately clung onto the hope that some of humanity would go on to create great and beautiful things due to his actions. That his Fall wasn't all for nothing.
Slowly, that hope fizzled out, and Luciferâs growing delusion that Earth mirrored the sinful realm of Hell in more ways than one plagued his mind.
And then you appeared, passionate about Manâs most beautiful creations. Art, music, long-ago writings of sappy declarations of love in the form of poetry, and times when humanityâs intellectual and innovative nature flourished.
âIt was absolutely magnificent,â Youâd start, drawing from the depths of your mind all the imagery you could remember from when you were alive, âFilled with all kinds of artistic expression, painters that filled the ceilings of churches with heavenly imagery-â
Lucifer had snorted at that. This era in time had such a romanticized idea of what Heaven and their Creators were like. He pitied their ignorance.
â-and beautiful music. They were known for bringing to life a worldview known as Humanism. It was meant to bring back ancient philosophy â like from the Greeks â to uplift people to participate in the betterment of humanity, and to perpetuate much more virtuous actions. There must be a whole city full of them up there, I can't imagine anyone from that period ending up down here with how protective they were of their moral code.â
Heâd always listen attentively in silence as you educated him. Sometimes, heâd even pull out the classic yellow rubber duck toy he held so close to his heart, and begin to fiddle with it as you spoke.
When he worked on them in your room, heâd curate them especially for you.
âLook! This one can refill your palette with the bestest freshest paint!â Heâd exclaim as he wiggled it in the air, âAnd it still quacks!â
Every time, youâd pull up a cushion across the table from him, and rest your chin on your hand as you watched in amusement as he demonstrated his work.
In this instance, he squeezed the sides of the duck and it let out a pathetic Sqeaaooo and a glob of paint slid out of its mouth and plopped right onto the table. It splattered, leaving a few droplets on his pretty white overcoat.
Lucifer was a messy fella, and times like this made you growl quietly and reach for a wet cloth from your cleaning bucket. Hastily trying to rid his clothing of the bright red paint. Your movements across his sleeve made his body tense, and his breath quicken.
For someone who easily flustered you with abrupt acts of affection like the first time you met, Lucifer had the uncanny ability to turn his face as red as his cheek spots when you displayed such care towards him.
âIt's still a work in progress.â Heâd bashfully assure you every time something like that wouldnât go as planned.
Youâd wish Lucifer displayed such creativity outside of the yellow bath toy, but you promised yourself to help him down that path.
You could only imagine how many ideas this man had stored in that head of his, and you had a feeling youâd get him to wake up eventually. The thought of being there for him â with him, made your cheeks hot.
When it was finally time for him to leave the hotel â sometimes hours later, youâd walk him to the door of your little atelier and heâd turn to you, with that charming smirk and half-lidded look.
âArenât you going to say goodbye to Charlie?â You had ask, as he adjusted his hat and coat to depart.
âI already did before I got here,â he replied nonchalantly, as if you two existed in completely different buildings. Nevermind that she was a flight of stairs and a few halls away.
There were no more bold kisses to the limbs from him after your first meeting, to your displeasure. Even thinking about it gave you feelings that tugged painfully at your heartstrings and made you beg internally for more.
You desperately wished for him to softly hold your hand once more, to feel his lips graze your knuckles, to drink in the warmth of his touch.
Instead, he clutched his staff tightly, and dipped his hat to you.
âUntil next time, Darling,â his voice, like silk, had echoed as waves of gold surrounded him. In a blink of an eye, you were left alone once more. Your heart pounding just like the first time, and every time after that.
Today, your heart was pounding just as fast. Except there was no Lucifer in sight.
Three days ago, you got a call from a good friend of yours who ran an art studio on the other side of Pentagram City. She realized she had double booked her classes, and had begged you to take over one for them.
âIâve never taught anyone beforeâŠâ You had trailed off over the phone, apprehensive to the idea.
âNonsense! You are so well spoken, and youâre fantastic at this kind of stuff,â She exclaimed, âItâs not that hard, all you have to do is sit there while they trace the model and step in a few times to give them some tips on techniques. They arenât a beginner class, so they shouldnât need much instruction. Youâre also in charge of guiding the model with the poses, but I already have a sheet that has them all, so you just need to follow along.â
You stood there for a moment, thinking. This was something totally strange to you. What were art classes like in Hell, anyway?
âOh, AND they are going to be nude. At least partially, we make them cover their um, nether regions. That shouldnât be a problem for you, right? I mean, you get paid for it soâŠâ
Your friend trailed off, and the line went quiet for a moment as you mind raced. You looked around the now -empty atelier, your paintings finished and hung up around the hotel. You had nothing that was stopping you from doing it, not your skills, your time, or even the fact that the model was going to be exposed. You were in Hell, seeing someone like that was an almost daily occurrence. Telling her no just because of your nerves was a douchy thing to do, and you were far above that.
âFine.â You conceded.
âYAYY!!â She shrieked in happiness, and you had to yank the phone away from your ear before it could start to bleed.
The next few minutes were her telling you where, when, and what to do. You had listened intently, memorizing her words. You didnât want to make a fool out of yourself in front of strangers that you were teaching.
After hanging up the phone, had you went downstairs and to the hotelâs lobby to inform Charlie of your new job.
âIâm really sorry if this interferes with me working here, but I just couldnât leave her hanging.â
âPffft, itâs fine,â Charlie had waved it off, âYou accepting the position as my new interior design manager is more than enough, iâm just glad youâre getting out of your comfort zone like this!â
You sighed a breath of relief. Good, no issues. You were worried she would have said no, and the fact she knows about Lucifer visiting you? Well, you werenât sure how she was taking that. You never dared to ask, nor did she make any kind of indication her feelings about that.
âWhatâs it like?â She had asked, breaking you out of your thoughts.
âItâs nothing too bad, I think I might actually like it. I just help them with their techniques on mastering figure drawing by using a model as a reference. My friend says they are still looking for one to pose, so hopefully they find one in the next few days.â
âInterestinggggggâ Charlie responded, her eyes holding a mischievous glint to them. You could see the gears turning in her head, but what for, you had no clue. You didnât ask either.
You had spent the next few days preparing, you even had visited the studio. It was very pretty, and the room you were in was small, but rather homey. You had more confidence with your ability to lead the class now after locating specific areas of importance.
Which lead you to present day. You were hurriedly scrambling around the room, grabbing anything of necessity.
Your eyes jumped to the clock, and a squeak of panic escaped you as the classâ starting time got closer and closer. Finally placing the last pencil in your bag, you raced down the stairs, beelining for the door.
âWhere you going in such a rush, Hot Cakes?â Angel Dust called out to you from the bar, Husk next to him as he poured Angel another drink.
âTo class, do you know where Charlie or Alastor is?â You questioned them.
A rush of wind tickled your back, and you whipped around to see the Radio Demon himself looming behind you.
âHello, my friend!â Alastorâs toothy grin on full display.
âI heard you were looking for Charlie, unfortunately she left not too long ago. She said it was something of great importance, and that it could shape the future of the hotel. But do not worry, I am here to assist you!â
You placed your hands together into a praying motion, trying your best to appeal to the demonâs better nature. If he had one.
âCan you pretty, pretty please send me to the Regal Fortune Studio? Iâm doing a class there and I need to get there on time.â You begged.
Alastorâs eyes squinted in thought. Before his smile widened more than ever.
âAlright, I suppose so.â
You didnât get to utter a thank you before the demon snapped his fingers, and dark energy crackled around you. Cold suddenly gripped at your shoulders, and your vision blurred.
You squeezed your eyes shut, unsure of what would happen next.
âPlease donât kill me, please donât kill meâ
Suddenly, light hit your eyelids and you slowly opened them to see the studio before you, just steps away from the front door.
You exhaled a sigh of relief, before yanking open the door.ïżŒ
The door to the classroom was slightly ajar, and you could hear faint voices inside. Indicating that everyone but you was ready to begin.
You crossed the lobby, ready to pull on the handle of the door, before a slight movement in the corner of your eye caused you to turn your head.
At the far end of the room, you could partially see long, blonde hair sticking out into view. Then, you heard the stranger speak to herself. Quiet grumblings of a feminine voice as they berated themself.
You raised an eyebrow.. could it be?
âCharlie?â You asked slowly.
The stranger squeaked, their hair pulled out of view. You heard a thump against the wall, as though theyâve pressed themselves against it in an attempt to hide.
You slowly tip toed the hallway, before whipping your body around the corner, surprising the mysterious figure.
âCharlie!â You shrieked in surprise at the sight of her, crouched against the wall. Her eyes widened in shock, and she let out a shriek of her own. Her eyes darted around, before she pulled herself up to meet your gaze.
âOh my gosh heyyyyy, I didnât expect to see you here!â She mocked innocence.
âBullshit,â you retorted, âI told you where I was going like three days ago. Why are you really here?â
Sweat beaded on her forehead, and she bit her lip. As if she was deciding whether to tell you the truth, or another lie.
Suddenly, she let go of the breath she held, her shoulders dropping in defeat.
âOkay.. the truth is, when you told me you were hosting an art class I was so thrilled! For you, of course. But then, I thought about how much you and my dad were getting along! Then, I thought about how you guys seemed to have the shared interest of art. So I.. told him about the class?â
âAnd?â You questioned, irritation lacing your voice. You really did not have time for this.
âAnd I told him about how you were still looking for a model, and you know how he is. He doesnât have a problem doing things like that in front of people, and heâs getting better at being around people in general..â
You gripped Charlie by her shoulders when she trailed off again, shaking her.
âSpit it out! What about your dad?!â
âHE AGREED TO BE THE MODEL FOR YOUR CLASS BUT I HAD NO IDEA THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO BE NUDE UNTIL WE SHOWED UP BUT HE JUST SAID GOODBYE AND WALKED INTO THE BACK ROOM!!â
You stopped dead, your breath caught in your throat. You turned your head slightly, eyeing the classroom door.
âYour dad⊠is in there⊠naked?â You finally managed to get the sentence out, your gaze returning to Charlie in a look of disbelief.
This was a joke, right? There was noooo way you were going to walk in there a minute and see Lucifer there. This was just a terrible (-bly good?) dream.
Charlie nodded in defeat, her head hung low.
âI donât even have the mental strength to go in there. I couldnât stop him, even if I wanted to. He was dead set on this.â
You rubbed a hand along your face, gathering your thoughts.
âWell, thereâs no stopping it now,â You said, rolling your shoulders in preparation, âGuess I have a class to teach.â
âHave fun..?â Charlie smiled innocently at you. Her plan was working, after all.
You shot her a glare before crossing the lobby once more, and pulled open the door. You stepped inside, breath hitched, and gently shut the door behind you.
In front of you, four older women sat behind easels with a blank white canvas attached. If they noticed your arrival, they didnât show it. Instead, they giggled in the direction of the slightly lifted stage. You couldnât see who was on the stage, but the familiar voice with giddy amusement told you exactly who it was.
âYouâre finally here!â Lucifer called, and you did nothing but stand there for a moment.
Straightening your back, you exhaled a deep breath, and walked forward. Right past the stage. You kept your eyes in front of you, ignoring the golden gaze that trailed your figure.
You positioned yourself between the platform and the women who had finally stopped giggling and whispering to each other, and cleared your throat.
âHello, everyone. Iâm your instructor for today, unfortunately Renee couldnât be here today. Weâll be going over the usual though, figure drawing with the model present today.â
You squeezed your eyes shut, before opening them with renewed energy.
Slowly, you turned on your heels and pivoted in the direction of the platform. Your eyes widening at the sight.
Before you, on a long, red couch lay the King of Hell. Lucifer Morningstar, in all his glory. Shirtless, with no pants in sight. Thankfully, a thin, barely-hiding-anything sheet covered his waist section.
You met his gaze, a playful smirk etched on his lips. He wiggled his eyebrows at you, gauging for a reaction.
You made sure not to give him one. If he thought he was going a reaction from you in front of all these people, he was wrong.
âLetâs start by doing a quick sketching exercise, take about ten minutes to do your best and draw the model in front of you. Once the timer goes off, weâll review and go over some techniques, before switching to a much longer pose.â
You clicked the timer, and the faint ticking of its gears cemented you into reality.
âIs that Lucifer?â One of the ladies whispered to her friend a chair over. Her friend shrugged, âI have no idea.. but boy, is he handddssoomee.â
You pressed your lips together, trying to ignore their gossip.
Sitting in the chair farthest from the group, you crossed your arms, your gaze resting on the floor. Was he looking at you right now?
You sat there for a moment, before realizing you couldnât ignore him forever. He was the model after all. Soon youâd have to be helping him change poses anyway.
You looked up, drinking in the view. He was lazily leaning against the back of the velvet couch,
His hair, with no hat to cover it, stuck to his face messily with sweat. As he adjusted his head, a few strands of curls fell in front of his eyes. His intense stare slightly masked.
Was the room getting hot, or was it just you?
His eyes were locked on you, that stupid smirk still on his face. You sent daggers back to him.
He replied with a wave of his fingers.
You refused to let yours eyes travel any farther than his face, not ready for what kind of images your mind would give you regarding what was underneath the sheet.
âDid you know the Renaissance was pretty famous for constantly expanding its artistic art forms?â A voice smooth as butter filled the silence.
What the hell was he doing?!
âBelieve it or not, the naked human was a very big inspiration for many of their paintings. No sheet in sight.â
Some of the women perked up in interest at Luciferâs words. You couldnât tell if they were actually interested in what he had to say, or just to hear his voice as it commanded the roomâs attention.
âFor an era so virtuous,â He teased the last part, reminding you of your discussion days earlier, âThey so did love their scandalous marble status.â
He let that sink in, and you rolled your eyes dramatically at him. You couldnât believe this was how Charlie planned on setting the two of you up.
A candle lit romantic dinner? Nah. A trip to the movies? Boring, apparently.
Were you against the idea of getting closer with the âBig Boss of Hellâ? Of course not! He made you laugh and was actually interested in your ideas. This was just not how you expected it to go down.
âKeep talking, pretty boy!â One called from behind her easel.
Before he could speak again, the timer shrieked in your palm. You shot up from your seat, clasping your hands together loudly.
You turned your back to Lucifer as you began instructing the class, showing them a few techniques on how to straighten their lines, and how to hold their pencil just the right way that would give them a much thicker line for specific parts of the body.
âAlright, now, weâre going to have the model switch positions.â
Grabbing the paper that held all the different poses, you held it out to him, your finger tapping against the specific one in question. It showed the figure in a front facing view, one hand closed in a fist supported their chin, the other tucked neatly underneath. As if they were listening intently to some hot gossip.
âIâm afraid I canât see whatâs on the paper. Perhaps, if you come a little closer and show me?
You groaned internally, he was enjoying this too much. You strided over to him. His gaze followed you, his grin only widening as you closed in on where he laid.
âYou need to turn facing them,â You commanded the King himself. He pivoted, his body fully facing the group of gawking onlookers. He gave them a wink, and they hid behind their easels, their whispers fast and beathless.
âNow, you have to move your arm.. like this.â You spoke, reaching out one hand. You hesitated for a minute. Youâve never been so.. upfront with like this.
Reaching down, you gently circled your fingers around his wrist. Slowly, you allowed your hand to slip down, reaching his forearm.
His body was hot to the touch, and you felt like melting right then and there. Maybe it was time just to accept defeat, this man was just too good looking.
You felt the muscles of his arms shift, and you halted for a half a second.
Did he just tense?
Maybe you werenât the only one who could be teased.
You guided his arm forward, and then up. Sliding your fingers, ever so gently, around his knuckles. You squeezed, and his hand enclosed into a fist. You guided it underneath his chin.
âTouchy today, arenât we?â He spoke quietly to you, his voice dripping with velvet allure as you positioned him as the image on the paper showed.
âYou be quiet.â You scolded him, trying your best to bring on your most serious face.
His quiet chuckle in response made you drop the face instantly. It was obvious you were pretty bad at this kind of thing, at least compared to Lucifer.
You grabbed his other arm, and gently tugged it underneath. Letting it lay neatly below him.
Taking a step back, you admired your work.
You were going to return to your seat, before a thought crossed your mind. You took a step forward, closing in on Lucifer again.
âAnd one more thingâŠâ You started.
Using two fingers, you grazed the bottom of his chin, firmly pressing upward. Instinctually, his head followed the motion. He met your eyes, his gaze intensifying.
âGood boy.â You teased, your voice laced with a hint of sultry satisfaction.
You didnât miss his pupils dilating into slits and his breath hitching slightly. You just turned on your heels, not giving him a second glance before returning to your seat.
You tilted your head at him slightly, looking at him through your eyelashes. Your lips curling into a provocative smirk as you gripped the timer.
Maybe now this would be an even match.
âBegin.â
Time flew by once more, and this time, Lucifer refused to meet your gaze. Instead, he was purely focused on the easels in front him.
âTell me, my dear artist,â He began, addressing the demon woman before him. Her eyes widened when she realized he was speaking to her.
âIf we were back in the Renaissance, would I make quite the muse?â
âPardon?â The lady asked timidly, her voice coming out in a whisper.
âHow about a statue? Think about that. Tall, Marble-skinned, and⊠lacking this rather uncomfortable cloth.â
The womanâs face turned bright red. Her mouth opened and closed, her tongue refusing to cooperate. Lucifer knew how to play this game well.
Then, he turned his head to you.
âWhat about you, stranger? Would you think iâd look good in such a form?â
You crossed your legs, leaning back in your chair.
âIf the statue could stay quiet, while the class finished their work. Then, perhaps.â
The angel huffed, averting his gaze. He blew a few strands of hair out of his face, before continuing his blank stare at the wall.
The timer in your palm rang once more. You lifted yourself out of the chair. This was it, the last pose.
You strided back to Lucifer, his smoldering gaze on your figure as you approached.
For this pose, he needed to be off his stomach. You werenât going to roll him like a log, or go anywhere near his torso. That was too brazen of an act for you to commit to, at least with all the eyes on you. Instead, you squeezed your eyes shut and gripped the white sheet. You tugged with all your might.
With an oomph he rolled along with it, he shoulder blades digging into the cushions as he landed exactly where you wanted.
Before the ladies could get even a glimpse, you hurriedly adjusted the sheet back onto him.
âImpressive, bending the devil himself to your will.â He commented as you continued to adjust his arms.
Ignoring him, you moved onto his legs, positioning them slightly.
âCareful~â He chided.
You said nothing to that either. Once he was in the correct pose, you released him. You glanced at his hair, now messily covering his face.
You reached forward and, splaying your fingers, pushed his hair back behind his head. You let your nails softly graze his scalp before you tugged them free.
âSorry, canât have your curls covering your face for the girls back there.â
âI bet they wished they were in your position,â Lucifer hummed âFew rarely are.â
You chuckled softly, âPlease, the view looks better from back there.â
He let out an audible âHa!â as the words left your lips and you turned away from him once more. You knew that mustâve stung, sending a blow to the prideful kingâs ego.
Thirty minutes went by as you sat there, you spent more time examining your hands than meeting the gaze of the angel across the room.
This had turned into quite an eventful class, you couldnât lie. You also didnât expect such a shameless attitude from Lucifer, he was much more timid back in your painting room. Perhaps there was a side of him you still had yet to meet.
To be honest, sitting here, watching the clock tick by, you were pretty surprised this man had managed to stay near-perfectly still these past few hours.
Another thirty, and the timer rang its last chime. You had been positioned behind the drawing ladies, giving them critiques on their work.
You ignored the fact it was Lucifer you kept staring at on their canvas, instead simply regarding it as charcoal lines in need of straightening.
You wished them farewell at the doorway as they left. You hoped they had at least a pleasant time, since theyâd have at least a good story to tell to their girlfriends over the phone.
Shutting the door with a soft thud, you sat there for a moment before your shoulders dropped in exhaustion. You honestly werenât used to that kind of atmosphere, since your work consisted of you alone in a quiet room all day.
Taking a few steps backwards farther into the room, your gaze landing on the couch atop the platform. It was empty. Your eyes widened, did Lucifer just leave you here?
You rushed out of the classroom and strode into the lobby, searching for any signs of him.
âWow, that little sneaky piece of-â
âIâm right here.â Came a familiar voice behind you.
You jumped, whipping around to find Lucifer dressed fully. Hat and all. Now this is what you were used to. Crossing your arms, you raised an eyebrow.
âWhat was that back there?â You motioned to the room behind you.
âMy daughter invited me to look good in front of people and I did an outstanding job, as usual.â
âAs the model? You couldnât have just used your position as King to get a spot behind the easel instead?â
Lucifer grinned widely, leaning back against the wall. Could this have been his plan, and not Charlieâs? Now you werenât so sure.
âUnfortunately, not many of us have a skill as perfected as yours with a brush.â
You accepted that praise. You had worked hard for it.
âAnd, not many people have as great of a photogenic face as me. So, weâre square.â
You chuckled, shaking your head as you walked away. Lucifer kept pace as you both exited the studio, heading toward the curb.
âThat reminds me,â Lucifer halted, reaching into his pocket to fish for something.
You stopped beside him, the mystery item in his coat pocket piquing your interest.
âI fixed it!â He held the the paint-vomiting rubber duck out to you, wiggling it in delight.
âYou did?â
âThatâs right. This bad boy can now pop out six different colors, you just have to pull its beak.â
âThat actually really cool,â You laughed, taking the rubber toy from him. You turned it in your hands, maybe later youâd pretty it up with some fresh paint.
You looked up at him again, his golden eyes shimmering from the bright neon backdrop. You have much more to say to him, but your thoughts were jumbled from the day. There was one, though.
âYou know, next time you should just ask.â You gripped the duck firmly in the palm of your hand, lowering your arm.
âAsk what?â
âDonât play dumb with me, Luci. Youâre telling me you hijacked my class because you had a change in career choice?â
His smile turned playful again, and he pivoted to face you, shrugging nonchalantly.
âMaybe, maybe not. That depends if iâll be seeing you next week?â His eyes met yours with a questioning stare.
You gave him a warm-hearting smile, nodding your head.
âAs always.â
His smile widened, and with a tap of his staff. Golden waves cascaded around you. It wasnât cold, like Alastors. Instead, it was warm and relieving, like face planting into your pillows after an exhausting day.
As your vision began to obscure, you saw his face peak into the cascades of light, his hand reaching forward.
âI almost forgot.â His voice echoed, distorted by the magic as it circled them.
His hand enclosed around your own, and planted a kiss right onto your wrist. His lips lingered for a moment, as did his grip around your hand, as if your time together was too fleeting to let go.
You promised silently it wasnât.
The light rushed over you suddenly, and you had to squeeze your eyes shut to keep from being blinded. Luciferâs touch vanishing with your sight.
Feeling your feet planting on solid ground, your eyes widened to familiar surroundings of the hotel lobby. You were home, and Lucifer was no where in sight.
âHey, Hot Cakes!â Angel Dust called, still seated in the same spot at the bar, âHowâd it go?â
ââââââ
đ€ alright, let me know what you think of this!! your comments are appreciated, esp if you have any ideas on what to do next!
đ the kisses are getting higher! part 3?
#lucifer morningstar#lucifer morningstar x reader#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel x reader#did i do the sexy good?#my asexual ass is trying yâall#this man has been in one ep and weâre all snarling over him jesus
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