#Not because I like to write things that take a lot of effort but because of base up thinking. An autistic trait.

[herrscherofmagic]

I'd like to add to this, though it's a bit tangential — there's also some pretty fundamental skills that exist in both STEM and humanities, and being able to make the connections between how they exist in these separate fields can really help your comprehension in either or both categories.

I'll have to apologize in advance because this post got way, way longer than I intended, and it's a fair bit messy and all over the place. But I do try and tie it back in to this original post, even if it takes a hot minute to get there >.>

.

I'm no longer in STEM at the moment but I did take a handy amount of both STEM and humanities courses, and ultimately chose the humanities route. Despite focusing on the humanities, there's definitely some STEM ideas that I found really useful in life, and by far the #1 has probably been the idea of abstraction.

For instance, when you say "abstract" there's a lot of things that can come to mind, with a common example being abstract art, right? Everyone knows the "crappy modern art" that's "overvalued" and "nonsensical" and whatnot. The funny-lookin' paint splatters on a canvas, or the giant blocks of solid color. That sort of thing.

Well, the word "abstract" is meant to represent the idea of something which exists separately from the real world. In contrast, the real stuff is described as being "concrete". The thing is that there's a spectrum of this stuff, with some things being more concrete but still a little abstract, and vice-versa.

Turns out that this is a REALLY important idea in computer science. Because computer chips work with 1s and 0s, and our silly primate brains ain't optimized to add a bajillion 1s and 0s. So instead, we use abstraction to describe collections of operations with these 1s and 0s: from the fundamental machine code that's binary operations only, to the "assembly language" that bridges the gap between binary numbers and human-readable characters, then to the higher-level programming languages.

We use highly-abstracted programming languages and write code like "a + b = c" but that has to be translated down into a more concrete code, the assembly language, and then that gets translated even further into the actual *real* operations happening on the transistors, the 1s and 0s.

And within a programming language we also use abstraction, such as in Java, an object-oriented programming language. You might take a block of code that has many different uses and describe it in a simple form as a class, then extend subclasses and give more concrete and specific definitions to that superclass.

A common and easy-to-understand example of this is Minecraft, with it's mobs, programmed in Java. There's a lot of things called "mobs", which are mobile entities that move themselves around and can interact with the player (and which the player can interact with). But some are aggressive, some are netural, some are passive— so how do you code all these different types of mobs?

What you can do is create an "abstract" class (not necessarily a literal "abstract class") for "mobs" in general, defining the most fundamental and simple traits (health bars, movement, dimensions, etc.) and then extend that class into specific examples. You might create a subclass for the "Passive mobs" that defines how they react to being hit by a player, with their frantic running around.

But then the "Hostile mobs" subclass has a separate and unique bit of code to describe how these mobs deal more damage. And then you can extend the "Hostile mobs" subclass into a "Skeleton" subclass to define ranged attacks that other mobs don't have, and so on.

You can work with varying levels of abstraction in your code, in order to meet different needs. By working at high levels of abstract you define wide and simple principles readily understood with less effort, and which can be more widely applied, and then begin to narrow down the code into more detailed sections for specific circumstances.

It turns out... that's EXACTLY how abstraction works in art. All the stuff you see in art exists on a spectrum from "abstract" to "concrete" and artworks are often made at some point on that spectrum to serve a specific purpose.

For example, you might want to visually depict a bird. On the most concrete level you have the human eye's vision of a bird, though even that is subjective: it's based on the physical health of one's eyesight, and the cultural expectations of what a "bird" is.

Then you have the photograph, which is still nearly exact concrete (hence "photorealistic") but still not 100% there. Then you have photorealistic art, and realistic, and then you go more and more abstract. You might move towards impressionistic art and pointillism, and then surreal art, and eventually you might arrive near total abstraction.

For instance, take this lovely photo of a Florida Scrub Jay (a very, very specific type of bird). This would be a rather concrete representation of a bird, and not just any bird but a particular species. Not a robin or raven or raptor, but a Florida Scrub Jay and nothing else!

(Photo from Wikimedia Commons)

Since that is a photo, it's pretty concrete to begin with. So to make it more abstract... I'll draw a quick study of it!

It's dirty and messy but gets the job done, I'm not making a 3-hour painted study for a tumblr post about STEM and humanities (and apparently birds, now). This took like... idk half an hour, 45 minutes? 15 minutes? I forgot to keep count and i've already put in like one and a half hours towards making this post by this point...

The drawing is still quite recognizable as being a Florida Scurb Jay, despite how messy it is, and you can also see the resemblance with the reference photo. It's farm from photorealistic, but it still has a strong level of concrete representation to it. It's far from true abstract art.

We can simplify things further, though, still staying representational but inching just a weeeee bit closer to the abstract:

First we do away with the background, stick with some simply bold lines, and use big broad shapes with solid color. Then we simplify it even more, using only a few lines to indicate major forms, and using just four colors. No tree branch either. You can still recognize it as a Florida Scrub Jay though... right?

BUT WAIT! Another competitor has entered the ring! in the corner with the steel chair, it's...

the Blue Jay?!

(Once more, photo from Wikimedia Commons)

Turns out, we've abstracted far enough away from the original photo reference, that now our bird doodle seems to resemble BOTH the Florida Scrub Jay (Aphelocoma coerulescens) and this lovely Blue Jay (Cyanocitta cristata).

After all, both are birds which are white and blue, and have a roughly similar body proportion. The tails and wing feathers are both blue, and the heads both have blue. Most of the differentiation comes from details, like the rings of black on the Blue Jay's tail, or the white tuft of feathers atop the Florida Scrub Jay's head.

Well, guess what, folks? We can abstract even further!

First, let's do away with all those pesky colors. We only need the one blue, right? After all, both the Florida Scrub Jay and the Blue Jay can be called "blue birds" so why do we need white or gray?

But that's not a very attractive blue, is it? So... maybe we brighten it up a bit?

Aha! Now we're talking. But this pose is a bit... meh. Now that we've abstracted away so much detail, you can hardly tell it's a bird! especially with the wing tucked in and the tail overlapped with the leg.

Maybe we can just flip up the wing and tail? And let's open the beak for good measure, too, just to emphasize that it's a beak and not a sideways ice cream cone!

Hmmm... That's looking better. Say, our original photo was of a bird standing on a branch, but we don't have the branch anymore, and birds fly right? So why not just get rid of the legs entirely?

And for some reason I feel like this would look really, really nice if we flipped it horizontally. Maybe clean up some of the shapes too?

Wait a damn minute...

Fuck, it's Twitter!

Achievement Get: Reinvent Graphic Design

Of course... there's still one last step of abstraction to take.

"Behold, a bird!-" Diogenes, probably

To make this a bit easier to understand, I've compiled it all into a handy-dandy chart (which I made before the aforementioned Minecraft chart, just fyi):

Representation isn't a singular possibility. That is to say that there's no one "true way" to represent a given bird, or in this case the Florida Scrub Jay. There are varying levels of concrete and abstract representation, and these serve different purposes.

Heck, even once we get to the level of abstract, there's different ways to abstract.

For instance, by abstracting to color, we get just a single shade of blue, not a random shade of blue but rather a specific shade that's derived from more concrete representations of blue birds.

But instead of abstracting to color, we can abstract to lines instead, and get a few vague lines that hint at the form of a bird flapping it's wings.

It's that sort of abstraction-to-lines that's useful in things like animation, where using simple linework to emphasize seemingly abstract concepts like "rhythm" and "movement" in a more tangible way can help make the figures feel more alive:

(Image taken from the Barnes & Noble listing of the book Gesture Drawing: Dynamic Movement and Form, by Michael Hampton.)

This is why I've grown to appreciate abstract art, even if it's not the primary thing I draw or my #1 form of consumed art. Because ultimately, abstract art can (though doesn't necessarily have to) serve a purpose: to explore the underlying visual themes throughout countless forms of art.

Explorations of line, color, value, shape, form, etc. have their merit in allowing us to contemplate these ideas in simple abstracted ways that do away with the messy distracting details. And once you get a better understanding of these fundamental art concepts in a more abstract sense, you can use that abstract understanding to reinforce your more concrete representational works. Shapes in underlying compositions, gesture lines in figure drawing, and so on.

Going back to the concrete-abstraction bird chart, you'll notice a little detour on the right-hand side of that chart. That's because I didn't draw my study directly from the photo; instead, I took multiple steps to get there:

A quickly and roughly-traced line sketch, then a value sketch (setting aside the photo instead of drawing over it at this point), and then adding the colors by eye, along with a few crisp lines to help indicate important edges.

THIS is the whole point of this rambling essay.

This is the crux of the matter.

This notion of concrete vs. abstract is one of the most important tools I have as an artist, because it allows me to divide the process of creating art into various stages with different intentions and different tools.

Instead of one continuous process from start to finish, from beginning to end, from concept to realized image... it's a messy back-and-forth between different processes that jump between simplification and complexity, from abstract to concrete.

It's that back-and-forth and decision-making which makes each and every artwork unique, and which helps add a tremendous amount of meaning.

And naturally, this applies to writing as well.

I don't want to drag this on any longer than it already has, so I'll wrap things up by going back to the very original post. To quote:

"I can instantly tell when someone in one of my STEM classes didn’t pay attention in English class in high school because they can’t read scientific articles without feeding them through ChatGPT."

Yeah. This is EXACTLY why I despise ChatGPT and almost every other form of "generative AI".

Even setting aside the environmental aspects,

Even setting aside the blatant stock manipulation and technocratic bullshit,

Even setting aside the plagiarism...

...ultimately, these statistical models cannot truly replicate the human process of creation.

They simply aggregate values associated with keywords, associations which are algorithmically trained via a dataset, and then spit out some randomized combination of these values. Regardless of whether these values are words or pixels or sound waves.

Letting these generative models do your "thinking" for you?? that can only be utterly devastating to one's own critical thinking skills. I'm quite frankly terrified by how desperately these companies push these "tools" because literally nobody on this godforsaken planet truly benefits from these things excepts shareholders.

Note, this isn't a dig at all forms of machine learning; there's an AMAZING wealth of possibility from machine learning as a whole.

This "AI" stuff just ain't it.

And this is why, ultimately, it's so important to study both humanities and STEM to some degree. These are different fields of knowledge that often have similar underlying skills involved, and learning about these different fields and identiying these common skills will strengthen your ability to use these skills in all sorts of scenarios.

To use an analogy with exercise, swimming and running are two very different forms of exercise. Just because a person is good at athletic running doesn't mean they're good at athletic swimming, and vice-versa.

However, both running and swimming require muscle movements, and the action of muscles requires energy. These muscles consume energy we get from nutrients, but importantly, they need *oxygen* to facilitate this process. And we get oxygen by breathing, right?

So folks learning to do exercise often need to learn to breathe well, too. We breathe almost effortlessly in daily life, but breathing purposefully helps you maximize your oxygen intake and CO2 outtake, making sure your body has enough oxygen to keep its muscles running optimally and for longer. Taking deeper and longer breaths while swimming, for example, can help you dive deeper for longer.

But guess what? Exercise ain't the only thing that needs good breathing. It turns out, when playing woodwind instruments like flutes, where you blow air out into or past the instrument to make sound... breathing is a handy thing as well.

So, all else being equal, a good swimmer will probably be better at breathing when they start athletic running than someone else who is also just starting to practice athletic running.

And, all else being equal, a good swimmer will probably have a better lung capacity and thus be better-equipped to play long passages when they begin learning to play the flute, compared to a different novice flautist who hasn't done any sort of exercises to practice their breathing technique.

Ultimately, there are still differences between breathing for swimming, and breathing for running, and breathing for playing music. But they're ALL still forms of breathing.

Likewise, the various critical thinking skills you learn in various STEM and humanities fields are all different and unique in their applications, but still have fundamental similarities.

Nobody needs to master everything, but to overly neglect STEM or humanities in favor of the other? That's going to hold you back, and make you vulnerable to being unable to handle various types of problems in life.

A lack of science knowledge might make you susceptible to misinformation about science, a lack of historical knowledge makes you susceptible to misinformation about history.

A lack of basic math skill makes it more difficult for you to handle logic problems in real life, and a lack of basic artistic ideas makes it more difficult to derive greater meaning and enjoyment from the plethora of arts in our daily lives; and so on and so forth.

The thing is that I think many people already have a greater deal of "basic knowledge" in various fields than they give themselves credit for. Even —or perhaps especially— when they're young!

Unfortunately, however, education systems (at least where I live, in the good 'ole US of A (derogatory) ) often separate these fields, and struggle to put them in the context of each other. To make it worse, once they're separated they're often further diluted to the point of near uselessness. History becomes rote memorization, art becomes algorithmic, math becomes overly formulaic, and so on.

If they can't be engaged with the educational material, they'll try and disengage. Especially if there are external circumstances such as bullying, chaotic or harmful domestic environments, malnutrition, etc.

And when time limits and testing standards are enforced atop all of this, naturally people turn to whatever "tools" they can to try and take back some of their time for their own interests.

Once upon a time these students would do things like write down the formulas for a test on the inside of their socks, or something. Now, of course... we've got ChatGPT.

There's so, so much to be said on the woes of education, but long story short, we're reaping the unfortunate harvest of decades of neglected education systems.

It's a damn shame, ain't it?

I cannot stress the importance of paying attention in language classes in high school. Maybe the reason why your English teacher taught you about unreliable narrators is because a lot of the media around you is written by unreliable narrators posing as reliable. Maybe they gave you assignments on interpreting texts so you could draw your own conclusions about news articles. Some of you clearly thought English classes were useless in high school and now are unable to engage critically with media.

[grandline-fics]

For your Valentine's Event: Single Red Rose with Benn Beckman. ❤️

DESCRIPTION: Single Red Rose- When your date goes wrong, they come to your rescue

WARNINGS:  mutual pining but it all works out.

CHARACTERS: Benn Beckman

WORDS: 923

A/N: Thank you @thecrimsonacademic for this request for the Valentine's Event! I hope you like what I came up with for Beck. This is my second time writing for him so I'm still trying to get the hang of getting his personality down

*REQUESTS ARE OPEN*

DIRECTORY | PROMPT LIST | KO-FI | VALENTINES EVENT MASTERLIST

————————

When you’d returned to the Red Force, Benn immediately noticed the extra bounce in your step and unshakable smile. His eyes always seemed to find you regardless of what was going on around him but when your mood was this good, it was impossible for him to not notice. You must have encountered something very fun to do on the island they’d stopped at. Still it didn't explain why you were back so soon. He was one of the few on watch duty. You were part of the group out exploring the island. Curious he stepped up beside you as you made your way to the kitchen to grab a drink. “What’s got you so upbeat? Yasopp get drunk and fall asleep in a flowerbed again?”

“No! It's too early for that, even for him.” You grinned, leaning against the counter while Beck grabbed a drink of his own. “I’ve got a date tonight.”

Not a lot surprised Benn much anymore but that declaration did make him pause and the once delicious mouthful of ale in his mouth seemed to become heavier and harder to swallow. While nothing ever explicit had happened between you both, Benn was very aware of his feelings that had been growing for you to be beyond just crewmates and friends.

You’d both flirted more times than he could count and been affectionate but nothing ever romantic or sexual since Benn believed letting things take the natural course to be the best plan of action. Seemed while he was on the ship and you were out on your own, someone caught your eye. He was a realist to know this wasn’t love for you and this random person. The ship would be setting sail in a couple days, this was just something to pass the time. Regardless of the meaning, the word ‘date’ twisted something unpleasant in him. 

“A date huh?” Beck asked, keeping an air of calm and lightheartedness in his words because the last thing he would ever do was sour your happiness. “Hope they’re able to show you a good time. You deserve it.”

“I hope so too.” You smiled warmly as you finished your drink and sighed with a light shrug. “But if turns into a bad time, I’ll not cry over it. They’re cute, but not that cute. I’m going to get ready.” You stepped away and walked towards the door only to stop and quickly turn to look at Benn warningly but still with a touch of playfulness in your stare. “And if Shanks asks-”

“I know, I know. ” Beckman chuckled, knowing the last thing you'd want on a date was for Shanks to lurk nearby or tease you and disrupt things. “I won’t say a word until we set sail.”

“You’re the best, Beck.” You beamed before disappearing down the hallway to get ready for your night.

It wasn't long after you’d left to go meet your date when Lucky and Hongo returned to allow Benn and the others remaining on board to go out and see the island and have some fun. Beck knew he wouldn’t need to search far to find at least someone in the crew, knowing their lively presences would make themselves known without any effort. He was right because someone in the crew did appear, he was just surprised to see it was you and even stranger still you were on your own and the bounce you had in your step earlier was gone. “Hey you.” Beck greeted, his voice snapping you out of your thoughts. “What happened?”

“Guy never showed.” You explained with a small shrug. “Left a message that had he known I was a pirate he wouldn’t have asked me out.”

“You’re kidding.” Benn asked with eyebrows raised and a disbelieving shake of his head, some people were so gutless. “I’m sorry-“

“Don’t apologise, Beck. Like I said he was cute, but not cute enough to cry over. I just wish I hadn’t wasted my time getting ready for it to go to waste.” You shrugged, smiling softly at Beck’s sympathy. “Have a good night. I’ll see you on the ship.”

As you moved to head in the direction of the ship you were swiftly caught by Benn’s hand and stopped. You looked up at your crewmate and let out a sigh to see him looking at you with a serious look. Truthfully you weren’t in any way hurt by what had happened. You’d mostly agreed to a date with someone else because you thought it would take your mind off of your feelings for the man in front of you. Now you hated that he looked upset on your behalf.“Beck, honestly I’m fine.”

“Fine or not you look too good to let it go to waste. C’mon you wanted a date, you’re getting a date.” Benn instructed, leading you back towards the town. When you opened your mouth to protest he grinned at you. “Don’t worry I’ll make sure you have fun.”

“That’s not what I’m worried about.” You huffed out with a smile, finally letting him lead you wherever he wanted. “Fine, I’m curious now to see how Benn Beckman operates on a date. Show me what you got Beck.”

“Oh that’s a tall order.” Benn laughed, adjusting his hand to lace his fingers with yours. “Y’see to really get the full experience it’ll take a lot more than a single date. Could take a long while.”

“That so?” You grinned walking side by side with him. “I’ve got the time.”

——————————————-

TAG LIST (If I’ve missed anyone or if you want to be added just let me know) @3v37773, @tsaaps , @i-am-all-love-puns-and-lazy , @sanemisnonexistenteyebrow , @fiery-captain-spider-santa, @kabloswrld , @atanukileaf , @ane5e , @stuckinthewrongworld , @deathsmajestysworld , @cloudysunset04 , @chillerkiller , @extremely-ashtridic , @decayingpizza , @liesatemyocean , @ace-for-ace , @nerium-lil , @destynelseclipsa , @dreamcastgirl99 , @my-name-is-heartache , @iamn1ya ,  @yunho-leeknow , @hinata7346 , @h0oouwlss , @missrandomdreamer , @sleepykittycx , @ddawn111 , @jaygrl22 , @sylum , @acehyacinth , @resident-cryptid , @treelogirl , @maellem , @its-a-dam-blue-brick , @thulhu , @appalost , @dindjarins1ut , @irumawife , @laidenbreecatchall , @redwolfxx , @jevoislesbrasdemer , @schanwow , @pao198391 , @glitchtricks94 , @nina-ya @48daisies , @rosemary-lungs

[sincerelybubbles]

oooo shybau and hoth first kiss!!!

and I do mean you

warnings: lots of kissing, references to christianity, loss of faith, all of the lovely things I selfishly pour into everything I write pairing: hotch x shy!bau!reader

I took far too long with this because it felt like their first actual kiss needed to be so them and I didn't know how to do that until I suddenly did.

||

The night is quiet, the kind of quiet that settles deep in the bones, the kind that makes everything feel a little softer, a little more sacred. You don’t realize you’ve been holding your breath until the lock on your front door clicks shut behind you, muffling the world outside.

Aaron lingers in your entryway, hands resting lightly on his hips, exhaling like he’s letting go of something heavy. The case had been a brutal one. It wasn’t the worst you’d seen, but something about it had weighed on him. He hadn't said much on the plane home, but then again, he never really had to—not with you.

Now, in the hush of your apartment, that quiet between you stretches like a held note. The exhaustion clings to you both, but neither of you moves to part ways.

“You should get some rest,” he says finally, voice low and steady.

You nod, though you make no effort to leave, and he doesn’t step away. Instead, he watches you the way he always does—attentively, patiently, like he’s waiting for something you don’t yet have the words for.

Maybe it’s the hours of close proximity, the way his shoulder brushed against yours on the plane, the way he had glanced over at you every so often as if checking to make sure you were still there. Maybe it’s the way your body still hums with adrenaline, or maybe it’s simply because you want to.

But whatever it is, you move before you can talk yourself out of it.

It’s barely anything—a shift forward, your fingers brushing against his wrist. His breath catches. Just for a second. But you hear it.

And when you tilt your chin up, meeting his gaze, there’s something in his eyes—something searching, something unsure but steady all the same. He doesn’t move away. He doesn’t pull you in. He just watches, like he’s memorizing the moment before it happens, as if he wants to be sure.

As if he’s willing to wait as long as it takes.

You swallow, heart fluttering wildly in your chest. "Aaron..."

It’s nothing more than his name, barely a whisper, but it undoes something in him. His hands come up—gentle, grounding—one settling at your waist, the other skimming up, up, until his knuckles ghost over your jaw, tilting your face just so.

He leans in, so close you can feel the warmth of his breath, but he doesn’t close the distance just yet. He gives you that space, that choice, because that’s what he does.

And you—shy, quiet, observant you—you make the choice.

Your fingers curl into the fabric of his shirt, and you close the space between you.

It’s barely a kiss at first. Just the press of your lips against his, testing, tentative, reverent. He exhales sharply through his nose, like he hadn’t realized he’d been holding his breath either. Then his hand at your waist tightens ever so slightly, his other tilting your chin just enough to angle you to him.

And Aaron Hotchner—who is always so careful, always so controlled—melts into you like he’s been waiting for this.

Like he’s home.

His lips are warm against yours, steady but unhurried. The weight of his hand at your waist keeps you grounded, keeps you from floating away entirely, because that’s what this feels like—like weightlessness, like the moment before freefall.

Your fingers tighten in the fabric of his shirt, and he responds in kind, the press of his mouth growing just the slightest bit firmer. He’s still careful, still giving you time to pull away if you want to, but you don’t. You couldn’t if you tried.

The world outside is silent, the only sound between you the quiet hitch of breath when he shifts, tilting his head to deepen the kiss—just a little, just enough. His thumb ghosts along your jaw, the touch featherlight, reverent.

Aaron Hotchner, composed and measured, is kissing you like he’s afraid you might disappear.

It sends something warm curling through your chest, something that chases away any last shred of hesitation. You lift onto your toes, pressing closer, and that’s all it takes for him to let go of whatever restraint he’d been holding onto.

He exhales sharply, his hand sliding from your waist to splay against your lower back, pulling you flush against him. It’s still soft, still achingly tender, but there’s more now—more intent, more certainty.

You feel it in the way he holds you, in the way his fingers press into your skin like he’s trying to memorize the shape of you, in the way he lets out a breath when you tilt your head and let yourself melt into him completely.

It would be so easy to get lost in this moment, to let time slip away entirely. But then he stills, just slightly, just enough for you to feel it.

He lingers, his lips barely brushing yours, and when he finally pulls back, he does it slowly, like he doesn’t really want to.

His forehead rests against yours, his breath warm and uneven. For a moment, neither of you speak.

Then, softly, his thumb traces along your cheekbone. “Are you okay?”

You blink up at him, dazed, the weight of his question sinking in. He’s not asking if the kiss was okay. He’s asking about all of it—about the fact that he’s your boss, about the way this changes things, about whether or not you regret it.

And maybe you should. Maybe you should be afraid of what this means, what it could mean for the two of you, for the job, for everything.

But you’re not.

Because right now, with his hands still holding you close, with his lips still tingling against yours, there’s no space for regret. There’s only this.

You swallow, searching his face, the faint crease in his brow, the way his dark eyes trace over yours, studying, waiting.

And then, finally, you answer.

“I’m good.”

The relief in his eyes is subtle, but you catch it. His lips twitch like he’s fighting the urge to smile.

And for the first time in a long time, Aaron Hotchner lets himself believe that something good—something soft, something steady—might finally be his to keep.

Aaron doesn’t let go of you. His hands stay where they are—one pressed warm and steady against your lower back, the other cradling your face with a kind of reverence that makes your breath catch.

His thumb brushes over your cheekbone again, and there’s something searching in his gaze, like he’s looking for hesitation, for regret. But you don’t give him any.

Instead, you lean in first this time.

It’s tentative, your fingers tightening in the front of his shirt as you tilt your chin up. You feel his breath hitch just before he meets you halfway.

The second kiss is different from the first.

It’s slower but deeper, less of a question and more of an answer. Where the first had been cautious, this one lingers, his lips parting just slightly against yours, pulling you closer, tilting his head to fit against you more perfectly.

He tastes like coffee and something distinctly him, something warm and grounding, something you think you could get lost in if you let yourself.

And it’s clear now—he’s letting himself fall.

The hand at your back slides higher, fingers skimming along the line of your spine, anchoring you to him. Your heart is hammering, but it’s not fear, not nerves—it’s just him. The way he’s kissing you like he can’t help himself, like he’s memorizing the shape of you, the feel of you, the way you sigh softly into his mouth when he angles himself just right.

There’s nothing hurried about it, nothing rushed or frantic. It’s deliberate, patient, like he’s savoring the moment, like he’s been waiting for this longer than he’d ever admit.

And then—he slows.

It’s barely noticeable at first, but you feel it in the way his lips linger just a second longer before pulling back, in the way his fingers tighten against your back like he’s reluctant to let go.

When he does finally pull away, he doesn’t go far.

His forehead rests against yours, breaths uneven, warm between you. Neither of you speak right away.

Your eyes flutter open, and he’s already looking at you.

His expression is unreadable at first—something caught between awe and disbelief. Like he can’t quite wrap his head around this, around you.

Then, finally, after a long moment, he exhales, voice rough at the edges.

“I’m not sure I know how to stop.”

Your breath catches.

Because he’s not just talking about the kiss.

He’s talking about the way he feels about you, the way you’ve slowly unraveled him without even trying.

And God, you don’t want him to stop.

So you tighten your grip on his shirt, tilting your head just slightly, lips brushing against his once more in quiet invitation.

“You don’t have to.”

And with that, Aaron Hotchner—always measured, always careful—lets himself fall just a little bit further.

His presence is steady, grounding, and yet, your heart is anything but steady. It’s quick, uneven, rattling against your ribs with a nervous kind of energy you don’t know how to contain.

You step further into the apartment, away from him, before you can stop yourself, motioning vaguely toward the couch. “You can sit—if you want, I mean—you don’t have to.”

The words tumble out too fast, unfiltered, rushed in a way that makes your face heat. You don’t usually speak without thinking. You’re careful. Measured. But right now, with him standing so close in the quiet of your home, you feel stripped bare.

Aaron doesn’t move to sit. Instead, he studies you with that quiet intensity of his, head tilting slightly, gaze flickering over your face like he’s cataloging every thought you’re trying to bury.

You swallow hard, forcing yourself to meet his eyes. “I’m not nervous because of you.” The words come quicker than you mean them to, and you rush to clarify, stepping forward again. “I don’t want you to think that. I trust you, Aaron. Completely.”

His brow creases slightly, lips parting like he’s about to speak, but you don’t let him—not yet.

“It’s me,” you admit, voice softer now, almost hesitant. “I don’t trust myself.”

His expression shifts, something deeper settling in his gaze.

You exhale sharply, shaking your head. “Not in the way you think. I just—I don’t want to mess this up. I don’t want to—” You falter, pressing your lips together. “I don’t want to give you everything and then—lose you.”

The words feel small. Too vulnerable.

Aaron doesn’t hesitate.

His hands find yours, wrapping around them with steady warmth, grounding you in a way you didn’t know you needed.

“You won’t,” he says, voice firm but gentle. “I’m here.”

Your breath catches.

Because that’s the thing, isn’t it? He is here. With you. Always.

And yet, there’s still that voice in the back of your mind whispering that nothing this good ever lasts. That he’s lost before, and losing you might be easier than letting himself risk that pain again.

But then he’s tugging you closer, tilting your chin up with the lightest touch, and suddenly, none of that matters.

Because when he kisses you, slow and deliberate, he doesn’t leave any room for hesitation.

He’s telling you something without words.

That he sees you.

That he’s choosing you.

That he’s not going anywhere.

And for now, that’s enough.

||||

Aaron follows you into the kitchen without a word, his presence close but unintrusive. He lingers near the doorway, watching as you move—still a little careful, still a little hesitant, but steadier than before.

You open the fridge, the cold air a sharp contrast to the warmth settling in your chest. “Are you hungry?” you ask, glancing at him over your shoulder. Your voice is softer than you mean it to be, but the question is genuine. You need something to do, something to tether yourself back into the tangible, something to dilute the thick tension that still lingers between you.

Aaron exhales, the ghost of a chuckle beneath his breath. “I could eat.”

It’s such a simple answer, but it makes you smile. A quiet, grateful thing.

You busy yourself gathering ingredients, pulling out what you can with deliberate focus. Bread. Cheese. Something easy, something mindless. You’ve done this a hundred times—after late cases, when your body is too tired for anything elaborate but your mind is too wired to sleep.

Aaron watches, but not in a way that unsettles you. His gaze is steady, patient, like he’s waiting for you to dictate the rhythm of whatever this is.

“You don’t have to stand there,” you murmur, glancing at him as you set a pan on the stove.

He hums, stepping forward until he’s close enough that you can feel the warmth of him at your side. “What are we making?”

“We?” You raise an eyebrow at him.

His lips twitch, not quite a smile, but something close. “I assumed this was a team effort.”

You shake your head, focusing back on the pan as butter melts in the center. “It’s just a grilled cheese, Hotch.”

“Then I’m sure I can help.”

You don’t argue, though there’s something about the image of Aaron Hotchner making a grilled cheese sandwich that nearly makes you laugh. Instead, you hand him a slice of bread and let him take over, watching as he works in comfortable silence.

It’s easy, standing here with him like this.

And for the first time tonight, you let yourself believe that maybe—just maybe—this could be simple, too.

The sizzle of butter against the pan fills the quiet space between you, but your thoughts are elsewhere—circling the weight of this moment, the quiet divinity of it.

Aaron stands close, sleeves rolled up, the golden glow of your kitchen light catching the slight furrow in his brow as he carefully presses the sandwich into the pan. He treats it with the same precision he gives everything—handling something as simple as this with the same care as he does a gun, or a case file, or a person he’s sworn to protect.

It shouldn’t feel sacred, but it does.

There is something terrifying in the ease of it—in the quiet devotion of sharing a kitchen, in watching his hands work, in the way he glances at you as if to ensure you are still here, still real. There is something terrifying about being witnessedlike this, wholly and without demand.

It reminds you of stories you read as a child, of devotion poured from one vessel into another. Of sacrifice and faith, of saints and sinners alike giving themselves over to something greater than themselves. All in. No half-measures.

The idea of giving yourself over to someone—to be known like this, in every small and unnoticed moment—burns at the edges of your mind.

Because you see him, too.

You see the way his brows pinch in focus as he lifts the sandwich to check the color, the way he frowns when it’s not quite right. The way he tilts his head slightly, listening for the sound of the crust crisping beneath the weight of his spatula. The way his shoulders settle, not tense but aware of you. Always aware.

It is so easy to fall into this—into him. The ease of this moment is a quiet betrayal of the fear still curling in your ribs.

Because you want this. Him.

And wanting something this much, something that feels so wholly right, is the most terrifying thing of all.

Aaron must sense something in you—some quiet turmoil you haven’t named—because he turns, meeting your gaze with something unbearably gentle. “You okay?”

Your throat tightens. You nod.

And when he hands you half of the sandwich, the warm press of his fingers against yours feels like an unspoken vow.

The sandwich is warm in your hands, but you barely taste it. Your mind is elsewhere, spinning itself into delicate knots you’re not sure you can untangle.

You watch Aaron, the quiet way he eats, the way his fingers curl around the napkin he doesn’t quite use. The way he always chews a little slower than necessary, like he’s learned to be mindful of the smallest things, like he knows the weight of savoring something—how rare it is to be given something simple and good.

He looks at you between bites, not with expectation, not waiting for you to speak, but just looking. Present. Steady.

You wonder what it would be like to let him see all of you.

Not just the quiet, competent agent he trusts in the field. Not just the awkward, hesitant thing you become under the weight of his attention.

But all of it.

The things you keep tucked away, the things you don’t like to look at too closely. The weak, the ugly, the unpolished. The parts of you you’ve hidden behind layers of self-preservation, behind careful smiles and quiet nods and an unwavering dedication to keeping yourself small.

You’ve spent so long convincing yourself that your careful restraint is a kindness—that keeping yourself contained, giving only the good and holding back the rest, is the best way to keep the people you love close.

But Aaron doesn’t take pieces of you. He doesn’t pry, doesn’t dig his fingers into the edges of you looking for something to unfold. He simply waits.

And somehow, that makes you want to give.

To crack yourself open like the fragile thing you are, to pour yourself into his hands and say, Here. Here I am, for better or worse. Do you still want me now?

Would he take the raw, unfiltered version of you? The parts that make no sense, the thoughts that spiral too fast, the fears you can’t name? Would he hold them the way he holds everything—with quiet reverence, with the same careful patience he’s giving this moment now?

Would he love you, if you let him?

And more terrifying still—

Could you let him?

Faith has always been a foreign thing to you—something you were taught to have, something you were told to nurture, but never something you truly felt.

You tried. God, you tried. You folded your hands in prayer as a child, whispered words into the dark, but they never felt like yours. You sat in the pews, still and small, let sermons wash over you like baptismal water, but you never came out clean.

The weight of it—the expectation of belief, the demand for devotion without proof—left you hollow. They told you faith was certainty in the unseen, but you could never find comfort in blind trust.

So, you let it go.

Not in one grand act of defiance, not in a moment of clarity, but in slow, crumbling pieces. You stopped asking for signs. Stopped waiting for answers. Stopped pretending to believe in something that never made itself real to you.

You are not a woman of faith.

And yet.

You believe in Aaron.

It’s a quiet, creeping thing—not the overwhelming, all-consuming devotion you were told faith should be. Not something demanded, not something you owe, but something freely given. Something that grows.

It’s in the way he looks at you now—calm, steady, expectant, but never forceful. The way he waits for you to be ready, to be certain. He asks nothing of you. He doesn’t need your belief, doesn’t press you for assurances you can’t yet give.

And maybe that’s why you want to give them.

The feeling unfurls slow and careful inside you. Not holy, not sacred, but real.

You don’t know what tomorrow looks like. You don’t know if you’ll ever be able to lay your whole self bare, to place your fragile, beating heart in his hands and trust him not to break it.

But you believe he wouldn’t.

You believe in this, whatever it is, wherever it leads.

And for the first time, faith doesn’t feel like a burden.

It feels like hope.

"You're staring at the bread like it personally offended you."

Aaron’s voice breaks through the thick fog of your thoughts, dragging you back to the present. You blink, refocusing on the cutting board in front of you—half a loaf of sourdough, a butter knife hovering uselessly in your hand.

You must have been standing there for a while because Aaron is leaning against the counter now, arms crossed, watching you with the same mix of patience and quiet amusement he always seems to have reserved just for you.

Heat prickles up the back of your neck. "I—" You clear your throat, forcing yourself to move, to slice the bread like a normal person and not a woman on the verge of an existential crisis. "I was just thinking."

"About?"

About faith. About belief. About giving myself to you in ways I never could with God.

You spread butter onto the slice with too much focus, too much force. "Nothing important."

Aaron makes a quiet sound—something like a hum, something like a laugh. "It looked important."

You chance a glance up at him. He’s still watching you, still waiting, but there’s no pressure there, no push. Just quiet patience.

Your chest tightens.

You nudge a plate toward him instead, deflecting. "Eat your bread, Hotchner."

He takes it without argument, but the way he’s still looking at you makes you think he’s not letting this go.

Aaron takes a slow, deliberate bite of his sandwich, watching you over the rim of his plate. "You know," he muses, "for someone who insists on feeding me, you didn’t exactly make a balanced meal. Where are the vegetables?"

You scoff, setting your own sandwich down. "You're welcome to dig through my fridge and find a carrot stick, but good luck. I think there's a single wilted bag of spinach in there that I bought optimistically and then ignored."

He huffs a laugh, shaking his head. "That sounds about right."

"You’re welcome to bring me groceries next time if you’re so concerned," you add, flashing him a small, teasing smile before taking another bite.

Aaron lifts a brow, clearly pleased by your rare willingness to push back. "So you’re already inviting me over again?"

You roll your eyes. "I’m just saying, if you’re going to judge my meal prep—"

"I wasn’t judging," he interrupts smoothly, voice warm with amusement. "Just… observing."

You narrow your eyes at him, mock-suspicious. "Observing, huh?"

"Mm-hmm," he hums, finishing the last of his sandwich. He wipes his fingers on a napkin, then leans slightly toward you, elbows resting on the counter. His voice drops just enough to be dangerous when he adds, "Like how you’re getting better at teasing me back."

You freeze mid-chew, suddenly regretting every word you just said. You force yourself to swallow, trying to maintain your composure. "Well, someone has to keep you humble."

"Is that what you were doing earlier?" He tilts his head, faux-curious. "When you kissed me?"

Your entire body tenses.

The playfulness fizzles out of you so quickly it’s almost embarrassing. Your mouth opens, then shuts again, warmth flooding every inch of your skin as you suddenly become hyperaware of everything—of the way he’s watching you, of the ghost of his lips still lingering on yours, of the way your hands twitch in your lap like they don’t know what to do.

Aaron doesn’t push. He just waits, looking far too pleased with himself.

You let out a weak, breathless laugh and immediately break eye contact, staring hard at the counter. "I hate you," you mutter.

"You don’t," he replies, and damn him, he's right.

Aaron doesn’t let up. He leans in just a little closer, just enough to make you squirm. His voice dips lower, deliberate and slow.

"You know," he murmurs, "for someone who kisses like that, I wouldn’t have expected you to get this shy about it afterward."

Your spine straightens like he’s just yanked you upright with an invisible string. "I—"

But you don’t know what to say. You don’t even know how to breathe properly under the weight of his gaze, like he’s cataloging every tiny twitch of your expression, every little way you crumble under the heat of his attention.

Aaron, to his credit, looks like he’s enjoying every second of it. His mouth tugs at the corners, his amusement restrained but not hidden.

"That was a compliment, by the way," he adds, as if that makes it better. As if it won’t set you even more on fire.

You cover your face with one hand, willing yourself not to combust. "You’re being mean."

He lets out a quiet chuckle. "I’m being honest."

"You’re enjoying this," you accuse, peeking at him through your fingers.

His silence is answer enough.

You groan, tilting your head back as if pleading with the ceiling to strike you down. "I was having such a nice time eating my sandwich."

Aaron nods, completely unrepentant. "And now you’re having a nice time blushing in your own kitchen."

"I take it back. I do hate you."

"You don’t," he counters smoothly, just like before. Then, after a beat, he adds, "But I do love watching you get all flustered."

You drop your hand from your face just to glare at him properly, but it only makes his smirk deepen, his eyes crinkling with quiet delight.

It’s almost unfair how much of an upper hand he has—how easily he can undo you with just a few well-placed words. And worse, he knows it. He’s reveling in it.

"I’m never kissing you again," you grumble, mostly as a defense mechanism.

Aaron exhales a soft laugh, then tilts his head, considering you for a long, knowing moment. "I don’t believe that," he says simply.

You don’t either.

Aaron leans back in his chair, completely at ease, completely insufferable, and looking so pleased with himself that you kind of want to shove him. Gently. Maybe.

"I don’t believe that," he repeats, smug and steady, like he’s saying something as simple as the sky is blue or I know exactly how to make you melt.

You cross your arms over your chest, mustering up every ounce of composure you have left. "You don’t know that."

He just lifts an eyebrow. "Oh? You’re really never going to kiss me again?"

"Never," you declare, pretending your cheeks aren’t burning. "Not once. Not ever."

Aaron hums, nodding along, though there’s a spark of mischief in his eyes. "That’s a shame," he muses, "because I was going to say that I think we should practice more."

You choke on air.

"Practice?"

"Mhm," he says, and then—because he’s the worst—he takes another casual bite of his sandwich, like this is just some regular, normal conversation.

Like he hasn’t just suggested practicing kissing. With him.

You press your hands to your face again. "I hate you so much."

Aaron laughs, soft and warm, and suddenly there’s a gentle touch at your wrist, coaxing your hands away. You let him, mostly because you think you might actually pass out if you try to hide behind them any longer.

"Let me see you," he murmurs, and just like that, his teasing fades into something softer, something that has your stomach flipping for an entirely different reason.

You lower your hands.

He smiles—small, but real. "There you are."

Your heart does something absolutely ridiculous in your chest.

"You are so unfair," you whisper, shaking your head.

Aaron just tilts his head slightly, his expression all warmth and quiet amusement. "I don’t know what you mean. I’m just sitting here, enjoying my sandwich."

"You weaponized a sandwich," you accuse, pointing at him, and he actually chuckles, shaking his head.

"I did��not—"

"You did. You used the sandwich as a distraction while you flirted with me!"

He lets out a dramatic sigh. "Alright, you got me. I was flirting with you. And it was very successful, I might add."

You groan, dropping your head to the table. "I am so done with you."

Aaron smirks. "No, you’re not."

You peek up at him. "How do you know?"

"Because you’re going to stay, and we’re going to keep doing this—me making you blush, you pretending you hate it"—and one day, when you’re ready, you’re going to kiss me first."

You gape at him. "Absolutely not."

His smirk deepens. "We’ll see."

You lift your head and squint at him, trying to determine whether he’s a mind reader, a wizard, or just too good at reading you. Probably all three.

Aaron leans forward slightly, lowering his voice to something unbearably fond. "I like you," he says, like it’s the simplest truth in the world.

Your stomach swoops.

"You—" You cut yourself off, floundering. "I—I like you, too."

"I know."

You huff, rolling your eyes, but you can’t fight the smile pulling at your lips.

Aaron grins. "See? We should practice."

You swat at him, and he catches your hand, laughing, laughing like you’re something light in his chest, like you are something warm and easy and good.

You think you might let him keep you.

You try to glare at him, but it’s useless—he’s already got that insufferable grin on his face, and the warmth in his eyes makes it impossible to hold onto any semblance of frustration.

Aaron still has your hand, his thumb brushing idly along your knuckles like he doesn’t even realize he’s doing it. Or maybe he does. Maybe he’s just that unfair.

"You’re too smug for your own good," you grumble, though your voice lacks any real bite.

He tilts his head, considering. "I don’t think that’s true," he says, the teasing still evident, but softer now. He tugs lightly on your hand, coaxing you closer. "You just make it easy."

You scoff, but you don’t resist when he pulls you in. "I make it easy?"

He nods, all confidence, all ease, like this is the most natural thing in the world. Like you are.

You should say something clever. You should push back. You should do something.

But then he’s leaning in, and his hand comes up to cradle your cheek, and every thought you’ve ever had vanishes into nothing.

You mean to pull away, to protest but he presses a featherlight kiss to the corner of your mouth, and the words dissolve on your tongue.

"That doesn’t count," you whisper, your breath mingling with his.

Aaron hums, his thumb skimming over your cheekbone. "No?"

You shake your head, though you’re not sure who you’re trying to convince.

"Hmm." He leans in again, and this time he does kiss you—properly, fully, but still playful, still teasing, still drawing you in like he knows exactly how to unravel you.

You do pull away then, just for a second, just long enough to narrow your eyes at him. "You're enjoying this way too much."

He smirks. "Undeniably."

You huff, rolling your eyes, and then you’re the one grabbing him—fisting the front of his shirt and pulling him down into another kiss before he can say something else smug.

This time, there’s nothing playful about it.

He makes a low sound in his throat—surprised, pleased, needy—and his hands are on you, warm and steady, one at the nape of your neck, the other settling firm at your waist. You shudder at the feel of his fingers splaying across your skin, like he’s grounding you, like he’s holding on just as much as you are.

You let him pull you closer, let yourself sink into him, into the heat of his mouth, the gentle insistence of his touch. He tastes like peanut butter and something deeper, something heady, something that makes your stomach swoop.

By the time you part, you’re breathless, your fingers still curled into his shirt like you’re afraid to let go.

Aaron studies you, his gaze flickering over your face, searching. And then—so quietly, so earnestly—

"I would never leave you."

The words hit something deep, something tender, something you’ve tried so hard to keep hidden.

Your throat tightens.

He must see it, because his hand moves, his thumb brushing gently along your jaw. "Never," he repeats, his voice steady.

You believe him.

And maybe, just maybe, that’s not so terrifying after all.

[witherby]

First of all I LOVE your works i love how much effort you put into them!! You’re keeping this community aliveeee. Second, what would the batfam do if punchline cried? Like I’m talking out of no where just straight up cried. I know it must be hard to show emotions such as sadness because of her past and it would be hard to show such vulnerability to anyone. Thanking for listening to my Ted talk 😎

First of all thank you so much! I wish I could write full, one-shot-length replies to every single question I get asked, but sometimes I simply don't have the energy or skill to execute the idea that might manifest from that question!

Second of all, that's a great question! I think it would take an absurdly long time for anybody to catch her crying. I think it would take an absurdly long time for her to cry at all!

Punchline has Congenital Analgesia, so pain wouldn't make any tears well up. She also doesn't feel or notice any appropriate hunger cues, so exhaustion or starvation wouldn't do it either, especially because she's almost perpetually existing in that state anyway.

We also have to consider who her father is, and how she was raised. A lot of her childhood is left to speculation because she's not exactly opening up to people about the Joker's treatment of her. And why would she? In her eyes, he can do no wrong. Anything he has ever said or done to her was completely justified. What's the sense in crying over spilled blood? She just needs to do more. Try harder. Be greater. But not better. She can't be better than her Popsy. Nobody is better than Popsy!

It's difficult to find out what her triggers are when she isn't giving the bat family much to work with. That's not her job, it's theirs to find out and learn from, but the entire situation is layers upon layers of complicated.

When they first take in Punchline, she's roughly 8 years old and some change. I think they'll see her cry for the first time when she's 10.

Punchline doesn't know her birthday. The Joker didn't celebrate it. The bats don't know it, either, so they choose to celebrate her with the day they brought her to the Manor. They make a cake and set up a small surprise party, with things they know she likes such as more face paint, colorful clothes, books, and maybe some new accessories like bows and ribbons. She wouldn't know how to handle that. A party for her? What did she do? How did she earn this?

I think Punchline would cry over being celebrated just for being alive. She's never felt that way before.

[uncleasriel]

I think this illustrates something about the reactionary mind.

The underlying macho bullshit of that old stupid canard about "Hard Men make Good Time, Good Times make Soft Men, Soft Men make Bad Times, Bad Times make Hard Men" is at play here: the assumption is that being able care about your gender or race or disability or class or any other intersectional trait is just something only Decadent Soft People think about because they're too idle and not doing the work of Real People (tm) like backbreaking manual labour or soldiering or other from of Being Professionally Manly And Tough.

In addition to this premise being utterly ahistorical dogshit (too often used by militarist, authoritarian and fascistic pigfuckers to rationalize why they need to take control to make us big and tough again), it's also pathetically oversimplified and fucking factually incorrect. Crossdressing and drag performances were popular among World War 2 troops, and you'd be a fool to consider that this didn't have an impact on folks coming out. Even those that remained closeted were still able to serve defending their country (and all which that entails), and were defended by their comrades when petty bureaucrats tried to use edge-case bullshit to try and deny them what they were owed as veterans.

I pick out the gender stuff because it's the one that most readily pisses off the C.H.U.D.s (don't get girly gay things all over my fantasies!) but things like disability or race or class also factor in just as much. The 1944 Disability Employment Act in Britain was born out of similar conditions, as those getting bodily mutilated in the war were no longer able to serve in the front lines but still could pursue work that could aid in the war effort.

I frame so much of this through 20th century military history because that is what has defined the shape of so much of our adventure fiction, even 80 years after the fact. World War 2 adventure fiction, pulp adventure novels, historical fiction (I'm looking at Robert E. Howard in particular here)... all of it trickles down into the Fantasy Genre as we know it today, especially in the foundational bones of Magic: the Gathering. A lot of the imitators of those works have emerged over the years, and many of them carry on the same thematic assumptions of the genre that thanosisking unwittingly raises in their initial question: why would women/blacks/gays/cripples/etc even fit into those worlds, they're not there in the source material!?

I believe this is just a by-product of folks like OP who don't look at the source fiction and history underlying it in any more than a cursory way. For folks with limited understandings the topic, including themes the ones discussed seem forced. I would encourage these folks to read some Imaro stories or a Jirel of Jhoiry tale - there's a lot more to the genre that actively explores all manner of odd or atypical stories than just the derivatives that have trickled through the corporate publishing houses of the 1990s and onward. I strongly suggest they subscribe to Strange Studies of Strange Stories, and its predecessor H.P. Podcraft - the Weird Tale has a dozen of literary descendants, and they have a much richer history than folks know.

It's fair to quibble about how well some writers handle these themes - folks inexperienced with understanding intersectional matters can be clumsy, and the fact that writing for a corporate entity owned by Hasbro (which has to toe a very particular line called "don't do things that will make shareholders uncomfortable.") But simply barking "there's Forced Woke Diversity In My Wizard Card Game" is the bleating of a black sheep who is best ignored.

With all of the threats to the worlds like Tarkir or Mirrodin or the War of the Spark, wouldn't it be prudent to NOT include anything about race/gender/identity? Nobody was worried about their own gender during WWII because they were worried about survival. I feel it cheapens the threats that characters like Bolas or the Eldrazi present when you stick identity politics like Daretti or Ashiok because those characters seem more occupied with identity than with saving the day.

If you think no one was worried about their gender in World War II, that simply means you’re unaware of history. People will literally put in concentration camps and killed because of it.

[nightscythe]

dark sides of the primarchs' relationships

some of these are very dark (esp lorgar, angron, ferrus I guess) but I wanted to represent some of the less enjoyable themes in their relationships. some are kind of obvious, but I wanted to expand a little. again, it's how I write them, so you may not necessarily agree!!

18+ below the cut pls, it's sfw but some themes of death, obsession, etc, mostly pre-heresy

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the lion: struggles to interpret his feelings and often mistakes them as needs - namely, sexual need, but really any physical need. the heavy feeling in his heart because he hasn't seen you for weeks? must be because he had become used to your presence and his body must adapt to being without you. the burning in his chest when someone else dares to speak to you with a more suggestive tone? well, its not jealousy, it is his body telling him he needs you. overtime this would start to go, he would learn to interpret feelings in a more emotional way, but realistically he would need to care enough to want to try in the first place. he would always struggle though, turning every single one of his feelings about love into his duty. you're his responsibility, everyone else is a threat.

fulgrim: whilst it is obvious that his desire for perfection may have an impact on you, it has an equal burden on him. he always doubts himself, always taking a pessimistic view of both himself as a lover and to relationships as a whole. and your reassurance may never be enough, even if you do mean it and he seeks it out. he will always make each gift, each speech, each act of love bigger to meet his own desire to be better. and really? it can become more exhausting than anything. especially if he is always trying to prove himself and it sometimes starts to feel artificial. there would be a breaking point though where he finally realises to you, he is perfect, and there is nothing else he needs to do. but there is always that little, teeny doubt.

perty: trust issues will get to him more than anything. he'd need someone who has so much patience that it wears you down, but ultimately it would be worth it. the worst part is that he wouldn't often share how he feels, he keeps it to himself and sits brewing thoughts in his own head that you may just be like everyone else and not truly care. he'd keep it from you, never uttering a word, silently letting it all fester until it gets too much. and breaking down that wall he builds from his own thoughts would take a lot of time, a lot of effort, and a lot of letting him work things out on his own. that's probably the biggest issue - he has a lot of time, something you may not as easily afford.

the khan: his idea of love is different. in a good way, maybe, but different to others. love for him is choice, and he will not restrict you to it. if you want to leave him, then go. if you want to spend a day without him, then do so. he'd really need someone who can deal with his laid back approach (or more so, his promotion of freedom above all other things) to love. that can be tough. his free spirit may just be too free to some people, and that's just what life is like. don't expect reassurance or speeches of his feelings, they are not happening. he's quick to make his decisions, his conclusions, and he's quick to temper. in the right conditions, this can make a storm. if anything ever goes bad.. good luck.

leman: it flips with him, very sudden, very easily. one day he's so enamoured, so utterly floored by everything you do that he's got massive heart eyes and following you around like a puppy. other times he's in his own world, following his own free spirit, that it can make you feel neglected. all of this just ends up causing more and more anxiety, unknowingly to him, and obviously to you. its all unintentional of course, he loves you so deeply. and his love itself? it's raw. he's so set on being stoic and strong but he is fragile too. he fears the worst, his emotions are never waste. everything he feels he shows directly to you. that can be overwhelming; all of this is overwhelming. especially when you could wake up one day and he's gone to do something without any warning, not evening thinking that you notice.

dorn: he's cold. he's so cold that it burns. or... is that the raging fire inside just reaching through the cracks? words mean nothing to him, and it can be difficult to truly know where you stand. he would never say he loves you, he would make you feel like he didn't ever need you, but should you ever leave? he'd tear the imperium down brick by brick until he had you back with him. it's unknowing to him. a duty. an unspoken loyalty. he doesn't believe in anything being temporary, so you're with him for life now. even if he never says it. and its the fact it's just actions, ones which may not mean anything to you, that makes it so hard. the door he gifted you with a heavy duty lock may be strange to you, but you did tell him you were worried about someone breaking in...

curze: does not feel he can be loved. he thinks he deserves it, but he never thinks anyone would dare. he thinks any affection shown to his is out of selfish fear and the second an opportunity presents itself, that love and affection would be gone. so he worries. he worries you are just like everyone else. makes assumptions, accusations, tells you that he thinks you're lying. probably because in the past he felt he should be loved and forced it out of people. he never once stops to think that maybe you lay beside him, you hold his hand, you take care of him, because you want to. it doesn't make sense to him, not without proof, or time, or anything to support your case. he'd get it eventually, he'd stop spending nights awake convinced you'll leave him when you sleep peacefully beside him with no intention of going.

sanguinius: his foresight is a burden, knowing what will happen to him means his guards are up. he would always be devoted, and he would carry the burden of fate to know he had shown you love in a way that mattered. but the sleepless nights would come, knowing the heartbreak would follow. especially at first, he'd try so hard, he'd want to protect others, you, from the fallout of fate. he'd never wanted you to see him in a way as more than a guardian, protector even, but it was inevitable. especially being who he is. and he would keep it to himself, and it would eat him up inside. he'd want to give you an easier way out, a ending where his death was the lesser of two evils, but he could never bring himself to leave. not before fate forced his hand.

ferrus: he has to make you better. you though fulgrim was obsessed with perfection? imagine that, but reversed, and intensified by a thousand. ferrus can make you better. he can make you stronger, he can make you everything you ever wanted. and over time, as he improves you, makes you need to know that he's impressed with you, it changes you. he's unrelenting. and it's not that he doesn't love you. oh, he loves you so so much. but there's a part of him that thinks his encouragement, his desire for your perfection, it helps you. together you can be the perfect couple, but not because of beauty or looks. then it feels like you're a project to him, little more than a toy for him to work on each and every day. and he'd let you go. he'd give you the choice, be free of him, but you'd hesitate. could you ever really be without him again?

angron: he only knows war. pain. death. love is so... small to him. he doesn't understand how to be gentle, how to replicate the love some of his brothers will. but he doesn't want to hurt you, either. and it shows. he will not hurt you, he will not make you feel pain, but he would die for you. and would you die for him? well. if you wouldn't, he would make you. love for him is a reflection of the strongest emotions he feels. the words he associates with it are different. violence. he'd kill anyone who stood between you. desperation. it's a feeling he can't describe as anything other than need. consuming. it grinds on him, wears him down, until he treats it the exact same way as everything else he feels. you're his, and you will become a part of him, whether you want to or not.

rob: it should be easy to him, but its not, and that makes him feel worse. he's not stupid, he can process love and emotion. yet... why does it feel so hard? he always feels like he is doing something wrong, always expression too little in case he reveals too much, whilst always trying to make up for something he fumbled already. its a vicious cycle. the reality of the situation is he's torn in every direction, he's needed by so many people, that he doesn't have time for love. yet he would fight to the very end of time to show it to you. and it exhausts him to no end. he'd just need a little patience, he'd very much enjoy if instead of something require brain or body power, he could just rest with you in his arms, enjoy the peace, but when that's every single evening, it could become a little hard

morty: he carries around a lot of anger and it's not always easy to hide. like a bitter old woman who sneers at kids for stepping on her lawn, but deep down she has a heart bigger than anyone - she just doesn't like it when he things are messed up. probably a bad analogy. the smallest things annoy him and he's got a quick temper. he constantly has to remind himself to check his own feelings, assess if he's reacting appropriately, then actually respond. so sometimes, it can feel artificial, like it's a brave face he puts on, and eventually you'll just want to know the real him. and you can, but it may not be as easily heard or understood. with time he would get better, he'd balance his emotions with your help, but until then it may never feel 100% real.

magnus: the poor guy, he just doesn't think (how obvious, I know). his actions are well intended but the way he comes across is a mixed bag. you're proud of something you've done or learned and in the spirit of sharing your achievement he does it in one try... or he tells you a more advance version of a spell with the intention of helping you but... it just comes across as him belittling you. like you were never good enough for him, that he is so so much better than you and his standard is so far above you. in reality, he's just happy, he's sharing those things because he thinks it will help you. he's worried that he's not good enough for you. he feels like he has to prove himself, to show you just everything he's capable of, elevate the two of you, together. aww :(

horus: he knows about his charisma. like a beacon that sits on his head and forces everyone to like him. and that makes him question the reality of everyone around him. are you nice to him because he's Horus, or because you want to be nice to him? are you kissing him because he's Horus, or because you want to kiss him? it's a guessing game that he is losing. he truly believes that those closest to him do not care, and overtime he has developed trust issues beyond saving. he'd never show it though, but inside everything can feel like a lie. he'd have a way to work it out though - he's not stupid - but his way is long and extended, tests and games which may not be appreciated, and it may feel like you need to prove to him why you care about him. was your love not enough? it was. but he just needed to know it wasn't manufactured by that damn beacon.

lorgar: love... its something different for him. it's not love. it's reverence. you become everything to him, his faith, his truth, his gospel. you become divine to him in every way, perfection incarnate, holy as the gods around him. and for that reason, it is all written in fate for him. you are meant to be with him, you are meant to stand by his side. he would build temples in your name, he would burn planets to the ground if it meant you were happy. he would destroy worlds to bring you what you wanted. but, if you are unhappy with that? if you do not accept his love and devotion? that's heresy. that's denying the truth. and escaping him, it can only come through death. his one is quite dark, i'm very sorry about that. unless you like it, then happy to help.

vulkan: he wouldn't have many faults, aside from obvious primarch things, but I think he's full of worry. not insecurity, but concern, always worried about you, always thinking he may hurt you, worried that the feats he puts himself through may have an unnecessary effect on you. he knows that he puts himself in danger but he can't stop himself, he know your concern that maybe just one time, he won't come back - but he will still test the limits anyway. he'd never show you every part of him, afraid it may just be too much for you, and though he's never hiding anything sinister, he'd always be hiding something. and you know it. and he'd smile, assuring you its nothing. it's literally just something like he's never tried kissing you in a certain way in case he hurts you. or he was wounded fatally again but he's okay. probably better if he just tells you... but secrets in the name of happiness, I guess.

corax: sometimes he goes, for days. for weeks, months even. some may even question whether you've just made it up in your own head. it's not that he doesn't care, or he doesn't love you, but... he got lost in his own head. what he needed to do. and it doesn't help that when you are together, he's cold, he's reserved, and its like you've never even met before sometimes. he can handle all of this, he's secure in his feelings and is loyal to you beyond anyone else, but can you? it's not that he would abandon you, or betray you, but when you've waited for him to come him for months and there's still no sign of him, your thoughts may start to go somewhere less pleasant. you can ask him to stop, but it's never permanent, even when he's fully opened to you emotionally - he'd unintentionally fill you with doubt.

alpharius: oh its a bit of a mindfuck. one loves you, one doesn't. one whispers sweetly in your ear, one just whispers. one touches your shoulder and catches the tips of his fingers on the curve of your neck, the other one just touches your shoulder. it's little things. barely noticeable at first. something the everyday person would have just shrugged off. but after time, you do notice. that's not Alpharius. and it makes you mad. to think he sent someone else in his place? he had to, and you'd never understand, but he hates it as much as you. do you know how badly he wants it to be him that is with you each day? how insulting it is to know that he was sharing you? it drives him to the brink of insanity. it's truly the worst feeling in the world. but there's nothing you can do about it, and you'll have to live with knowing that maybe the man next to you isn't the alpharius you love.

˗ˏˋ 𓅰 ˎˊ˗

[girlwith15cents]

Oversharing on the internet about ADHD

I've been trying to write this post for awhile now. It relates to my previous post about mental disabilities. But it's proving difficult cause it keeps sounding too pathetic, but that's kinda the point.

I, in my present, have an idea of who I am. My interests, how I act, how I dress, who I associate with, my gender expression. These are all observable things. Ways that other people can form opinions on me. These are, by most means, who I am.

However, who I want to be is pretty drastically separate from that. I know a version of me that I can try and project but will always fall short of. I want to learn and enjoy makeup. I want a larger wardrobe of clothes that I genuinely like. I want to learn an instrument. I want to get into streaming games for fun. I want to be able to take my friends out to dinner and buy them gifts and go around the city with them. I have so many ideas for tattoos and I have piercings I want to get. There are so many things I want and yet cannot have and have no real avenue to get.

The reason I cannot reach for these (very reasonable) things is because of my lack of capital and personal agency. Extremely debilitating executive dysfunction has stripped me of any milestones of adulthood someone of my age might be seeing. I've never been able to hold a job without growing deeply suicidal due to the effort required. Hobbies cost money. Rent costs money. Expressions of the self cost money. I have always had to exist within the confines of someone else's generosity to take care of me. It has stripped me of opportunities to grow as a person. It has made me less and less who I want to be and more who I am.

All too often because of this people don't take me seriously. Financial burden that I am, I have learned to make myself small better than any other skill. I choke up when asked to assert my wants. I put others first. I'm quiet and guarded. Any strive to make myself the person I want to be feels deeply embarrassing. Like a child who is convinced they're something they aren't. So people who meet me see the child. They see the loser who won't take steps towards employment because they're lazy. They see the girl who orbits a social group but never belongs. They see a nice girl who has far less desirable qualities than the other candidate for this job position. It hurts so fucking bad to be condescended to without any ability to rebut it.

So when does it end? When I find work that won't end up being the death of me? When our government wises up and pushes for UBI or expands upon disability payments? When they invent adderal that doesn't have a million side effects? When I get sick of it and give up? There's no real end in sight, and every time ADHD gets laughed at as a pop-psych joke it gets further away. Am I doomed to be a child forever? When will I see the respect I know I deserve?

And sure, pathologizing behavior is 'bad'. Maybe the answer to all my woes is to grit my teeth harder than I already have been my entire life. Maybe the real reason I see no forward movement is because I'm projecting my own helplessness. But can't it be a little easier? Everyone else is having a rough time, but at least they're having a time. The behavior I exhibit is very normal to neurotypical people on a bad day, but it makes up my entire existence. And it sure feels a hell of a lot more severe than someone having a day of bad focus.

The fucked up thing about it is that I like me. The present me and the me I want to be. We both have so much to offer. We're both one of the best friends you've ever had. We both have skills and qualities that make us very likeable people. But these qualities have little to no monetary value. Any way that I could monetize it would also require investment. Investment that I cannot make without agency. So I'm stuck as a vague bundle of good qualities and talents that everyone sees so much potential in and is eagerly awaiting a moment where I channel it somewhere. A moment that will never occur without agency.

[pearlofthewoods]

I think there’s a lot of nuance to the whole discussion of what went down on the short-lived non-US tiktok.

Like yes, some of the takes were a little mean/in bad faith… but this here, this is something we ABSOLUTELY should be talking about.

Because perhaps, (through no fault of the Americans’ own) the discussion of regional UK representation just gets a little buried when the vast majority of tiktok-fandom is made up of Americans.

I’m not one to care about dialect mistakes or Americanisms in fics. At all. I’m just lucky I write for this fandom and I am British, so I largely don’t have to worry about this sort of thing. But I know that others do. And I know I’m privileged in that regard.

Because getting nitpicked for things that you have no cultural context for/way of understanding must be hell. No one deserves to have that done to their fic.

So in no way am I saying Americans or even people in the UK who live outside the Midlands are obliged to write Lily from the Midlands.

Write whatever you’re comfortable with writing. Don’t feel pressured to do anything you don’t want to do.

But that being said, I’m going to make an active effort to look for and uplift fics that centre Lily’s background and identity as a midlands-gal.

Because there’s so little representation for people outside of London/ the South in general in UK media and also unfortunately, in fanfiction. Particularly for the midlands.

I’ve been seeing more fics set in the North or in Wales or Scotland recently and I love it. I really want to see the same for others areas of the UK.

I personally don’t feel qualified right now to write that myself (not being a gal from the midlands), but I really wanna highlight fic writers who do write Midlands!Lily and are from the region themselves.

So if you know of any fics like this, or writers who include the Midlands in their work, drop them in the comments below!! Let’s give all areas of the UK the love they deserve.

Why do I have Americans on TikTok coming for my neck in the MASSES because I said that it's upsetting that I never see Lily Evans represented as a lower-middle class girl crowing up in the industrial midlands as an outsider to the majority of her close-knit VERY ENGLISH MIDLANDS-Y community

'You have representation everywhere' NO I DON'T

I CANNOT NAME A SINGLE OTHER CHARACTER LIKE THAT EVER

Her and Severus are the only characters I've EVER seen from my background, I'm allowed to be a little upset if I've never seen anybody else in the fandom explore or appreciate that. it wasn't even a personal attack on America, it was an observation

[icewindandboringhorror]

Pages from trying to keep a little sketchbook-scrapbook type thing going for two weeks lol. I gave myself specific rules in hopes they might all end up more cohesive/consistent seeming, but alas, scribbly chaos reigns, it seems

[yellowhollyhock]

nah but it's so wild because like. It's almost a normal 'sibling growing up' story, where you understand why the younger ones feel betrayed and abandoned, but it hurts to see their anger or closing off directed at the older sibling who literally just went through a normal developmental stage. But then they both grow a little and it all smooths out even better than it was until a few years down the road you got the second half, where the older sibling feels betrayed by the person they've always seen as a kid becoming their peer and standing more on their own. And it's all understandable and it all hurts and it all smooths over.

Except with tmnt 2007 they're all adults together and Splinter really said 'It's time for Leo to go on a journey of self-discovery, he needs opportunities for further growth and he shouldn't be relying on us anymore. The rest of you should go outside less but I guess you can have jobs if you want.'

like bro they would've been on that journey together, the 'growing up without me' angst was literally unnecessary because they were all growing up. At the same time. Together.

Being the most skilled and obedient student was the only mark of maturity Splinter was willing to recognize when his sons were all becoming adults in front of him and he manufactured a divide that literally did not need to exist

[bonestrouslingbones]

also i hate to admit it and i swear i DO understand the importance of them but fellas i fear i may be steadily morphing into a humanities hater

[gethoce]

ALRIGHT time for Anat's turn!! :>

1: If your partner could only eat one food for the rest of their life, what would it be?

Anat grabs a chalk board and leans back far, staring at the ceiling for a moment, eyes squinting as she's thinking. “Wine doesn't count, huh? Guess that's more of a drink unless you freeze it…”

She taps her cheek with the chalk while pondering her options, leaving behind a white trail. Then she finally writes something down and holds the board up. It says “CHEESE” in big letters. She tilts the board a little to look at it while explaining her reasoning.

“Honestly, I've only seen her eat once and from the things I saw her eat this would be the funniest in combination with wine. Also it has the same color as me. Anyway.” She then wipes the word away with her sleeve.

2: Who has the better sense of fashion?

Narrowing her eyes she stares into a distance for a moment. “Well, I, for one, think I'm very stylish! Buuuut I guess she put a lot of effort into maintaining that appearance she has. She got the polished armor, the cape and everything, it's very ferocious looking while also fancy…” She writes “LRK” on the board and holds it up for a moment, nonchalantly while murmuring to herself. “My belt of severed hands is stylish as fuck… also my cool as hell sea shell pauldron is a looker.”

3: Who would win in a battle?

“HAL…” For a moment she looks away, eyes wide open contemplating the consequences of her actions. “She seems like a formidable opponent, to say the least, but is she Anat levels of strong? I'd like to think I could wipe the floor with just about anyone. Have you seen what I did to the former DEVA of death?” She writes “ME” on the board and holds it up for a moment before erasing it again.

4: You get a new pet that you love, but your partner doesn’t. What kind of animal is it?

“I used to have a pet spinosaurus… I feel like she might not vibe with that? Most people seemed taken aback. Maybe she would get used to the spino but could she love it…” Letting out a huff she shakes her head in dismay, doodling a spinosaurus on the board which seems to be quite proportional.

5: Where would you take your partner for a vacation?

With her arms crossed she leans forward onto the table before her. “She does live in a snowy wasteland, so something warm would be a nice contrast. Perhaps Raisin Ruins to show her some history where there actually are remnants of my past left.” She rubs her chin with one hand pondering, then begins writing down Raisin Ruins on the board.

“I'd prefer my actual previous home in Dreamland, but couldn't find a single remnant of my past. There is a palace on Mount Lel like there used to be, but it's some place called Castle Dedede and not my father's palace??” She flicks a hand in disbelief, a bit of a grimace forming in her face.

“Anyway, Raisin Ruins is also better because there are less people. She seems to prefer not having too many eyes on her and I'd want to respect that. Hope she can handle the desert though.”

6: Which video game do you always beat your partner at?

“Heh…” A brief chuckle escapes her. Then she writes the word SMASH on the board. “While I have watched the Meta-Knights play their games, I've never played any myself. Though I'd imagine I'd be pretty good in that ‘Smash’ game. For some reason my brother is a playable character and his underlings always play as him?? Naturally his sword, an aspect of me, is in the game as well and I'd like to think that means I’d be fantastic at playing the game!” Confidentally she nods with her arms crossed and a big smile on her face.

7: Which Copy Ability would best describe your relationship?

“Our relationship? I quite literally am the sword ability, yet that would only represent me… I'd almost say fire for passion but that ability belongs to my ex. For me and Lady Radiant I'd like to propose a mixture… like Bluster Sword. She seems to have control over the wind at least to a degree…” She doodles a fancy sword and draws some tornado swirls around it to represent the wind. It looks quite goofy.

8: You have to make breakfast for your partner. What are you cooking?

“Ehehe… That one is… I'm not known to be great at cooking. I'd have to go for something easy…” Looking into the distance she frowns. This one is quite difficult for her to figure out. “Eggs.. wait, would that be weird because she is like half bird? But she doesn't like the bird side… let's have her have some boiled eggs, then. I think I can manage that. Also some buns and stuff. Easy but tasty.” With her tongue held out to the side she draws a bird and crosses it out, then doodles some eggs and ovals that are probably supposed to be buns.

9: What’s the best gift your partner ever gave you?

“Uuuh… We only had one date so far but she brought her own wine so that was pretty damn cool! Let's see how far we can take it from here in the future.” This time she drew a bottle, nodding at her artistic masterpiece. Then she leans forward, whispering. “You think she'd enjoy the torn out and still beating heart of a dragon as a gift? That's my favorite go to.” In the background her brother shakes his head disapprovingly.

10: What’s something you started doing because of your partner?

She taps the board with the chalk for a moment, then sketches a poorly drawn feathery wing. “Well she got me to appreciate feathery wings. Never gave them much thought before since they seem like a ton of work and just soft fluffy stuff, but she has proven that they can actually be quite deadly! Still, I'd rather stick to my dragon wings.” She stretches out her wings, flapping them a little before folding them back once again.

Muchadoo is hosting a romance-themed game show called Dream Date, and new contestants are invited! Kirby ship couples (including AU and OC characters) are invited to see how well they know their partners!

While the game is heavily romance themed, the questions are meant to work for platonic couples as well!

The rules are simple: it’s just the Newlywed game. Both players are presented with the same question regarding their partner, and each one must write the answer they think is correct. After both partners have written their answers, they reveal them, and we see just how right they are!

Here are some questions the couples might be asked:

If your partner could only eat one food for the rest of their life, what would it be?

Who has the better sense of fashion?

Who would win in a battle?

You get a new pet that you love, but your partner doesn’t. What kind of animal is it?

Where would you take your partner for a vacation?

Which video game do you always beat your partner at?

Which Copy Ability would best describe your relationship?

You have to make breakfast for your partner. What are you cooking?

What’s the best gift your partner ever gave you?

What’s something you started doing because of your partner?

There are no planned win conditions for this event, nor are there prizes; the point of this event is to simply provide a fun set of prompts for character couples/partnerships to answer in drawing or writing form! Just reblog this post adding your characters answering the questions, have fun, and have a happy Valentine’s Day!

[wriokitty]

Honestly I’m usually impressed more with the way a reader is characterized than the character themselves

[sadkachow]

if i hear one more pro-ai take i fear i may start exploding people with my brain

[electric-rabbits]

I'm reading Unmasking Autism and not to self-diagnose but something's wrong

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

> posts a fic i'm proud of about dark subject matter to do with five and his abuse, which came from a very personal place, on AO3

> gets a comment

> it is, Course, a hate comment from an anti, demanding on anon to know why i would 'spend my value as a writer who's read Legacies' to write it

> roasts their ass like a thanksgiving turkey and immediately goes to write more of the thing