#Not anger and spite

[grungegobbler]

ngl i think half of the infighting between transmisogyny and transandrophobia is just….the name “transandrophobia”. Having a word like that invokes a feeling of systemic misandry and male oppression. But the patriarchy benefits men and women are the ones who get most of the fallback from that, therefore a term like that MUST be bullshit.

Transmisogyny is about the intersection of transphobia and misogyny but, transandrophobia is just about trans mens unique experiences. Its less systemic than transmisogyny. A lot of the discourse ive seen is a misunderstanding that transandrophobia is about systemic misandry and not trans mascs being infantilized, talked down too, fetishized, and denied medical care in TERF spaces. While also experiencing hatred in queer spaces.

Trans femmes are seen as evil beings seducing children by not just TERFS, but also by the general public. This has created a truly hard existence for them. Trans mascs, on the other hand, are seen as poor sweet summer children who cannot be allowed autonomy. We are hopeless victims who cannot speak for ourselves. Cannot advocate. Cannot have a voice. This idea has, sadly, bleed into trans spaces. Even in trans spaces, transmascs are seen as small UwU cinnamon roll children who cannot talk about our personal experiences with the OTHER trans people. We need to sit at the little kids table playing with legos and lifting weights, while we are talked over.

Thats why transandrophobia, the parts that are about misandry, focus on it being within the queer community and not within society as a whole. Many queer people hate men for being, well, men. And they take this out on the transmascs who DARED betray them with masculinity. Transmascs loose support when they transition. We go from UwU little baby soft boys named Arlo, to a big scary man who will destroy the community at the first chance he gets. For transmascs, there is no in between. We lack spaces and support from our fellow trans people because their trauma views masculinity as dangerous.

In the queer community, femininity is a celebration of self expression. Its seen as a celebration in almost every queer group. Camp, glitter, dresses, makeup. Breaking gender roles is what is not just celebrated, but expected. To be a binary transmasc in the queer community is seen as doing queerness “wrong”. Trans men are pressured to be feminine and, if we arnt, we are seen as dangerous and less queer than our trans femme counterparts.

Transandrophobia is a disleading term for many because it isn’t something “akin” to the systemic oppression of transfemms; its the infantilization we experience from TERFs mixed with the dislike and distrust from other queer people. If anything, its more about our experiences in trans/queer spaces. It definitely shouldnt take away from the experiences and harassment of transfemmes, who definitely have it worse outside of the community. But i also think its not fair for people to immediately go “WELL, thats not real because misandry isnt real”, when we actively experience misandry in our own community. We both have different experiences about different lives and those two things can exist together. In a perfect world we would advicate for both transmisogyny and transandrophobia.

[kazoimp]

grossinlove dot jpg

[reasonsforhope]

You don't need to believe that people as a whole are good or well-intentioned to be an optimist about fixing climate change.

A lot of the time, it's enough to trust in this: people hate being screwed over. And even more than that, they hate feeling screwed over.

Climate change is actively screwing over almost every single person on this planet, whether they know it or not. We just need to keep making sure that people do know that they're getting screwed over, along with all their loved ones, and who's doing it.

Spite and righteous anger will honestly do a lot of the rest.

[r-2-peepoo]

I just saw a really stupid take from a Star Wars fan (I know, absolutely unheard of! (heavy sarcasm)) so here is a reminder:

People who ship clones with Jedi are more than aware of the power dynamic. That’s a huge part of what makes them interesting. If we were to to ship Cody with basically anyone else other than Obi Wan, it probably wouldn’t work as well because Obi Wan is precisely the last person who would ever want to pressure him or cross his boundaries.

The Jedi were totally screwed over and backed into a war that goes against so much of what they stand for and on top of that, now they have an entire army of brand new humans to lead. All of those brand new humans are totally unique and just experiencing the world for the first time, even though they’re all mature adults too. It’s a totally screwed up situation which puts so much added pressure onto the Order, so we throw romantic feelings on top of that and we’re not supposed to find that absurdly compelling?

Obi Wan is literally defined by his empathy and his kindness. The reason shipping him with Cody works so well is because there is no one who represents what the Jedi are meant to be better than him. Goodness is at the core of his character. There would never be a day that he didn’t value Cody’s wellbeing over his own feelings. Not to mention that they’re both so dedicated to their beliefs and responsibilities that a relationship is never even realistically an option while the war is going on.

Codywan is about the yearning. It’s about them both knowing they have feelings for each other and not being able to do anything about it because they are fighting for something much bigger than themselves. It’s about the infamous “after the war” conversation that they never got to have. It’s about them meeting again on Tatooine years later, finally on equal footing and completely alone in the galaxy, bonded together by their grief.

That’s why people love Codywan. The suggestion of anything otherwise is just an insult to the hard work all the artists and writers have put into making some of the most incredible fanfiction and fanart and fanon lore I’ve ever seen in any fandom ever.

P.S.— the portrayal of something in a piece of media doesn’t equal the condoning or promoting of that sort of behaviour. I thought we’d long since established that. Let’s use our brains here.

[niinnyu]

Moral compass

[bumblingbabooshka]

Saw another bad faith take about T'Pring being a murderous bitch, gotta write another fic that paints her in a warm and sympathetic light

[spoonmoment69420]

i had an idea i knew my brain could not rest until it became a reality

[i-just-like-crk]

Let us scream into the void for our batshit insane jester into the void together-

What do you think about Shadow Milk Cookie who once had a lover during his days as a cookie free from corruption, and when that day comes where he wreaks havoc onto Earthbread, his lover stood against him and lives freely during his imprisonment.

To see their fragments in the present, whether it's their name or their achievement as one of the cookies who went against a beast... Or to know how they're known as a cookie who loves a beast until their end.

(can I be 🍡 anon?)

Shadow Milk Cookie does not take your betrayal well.

Not agreeing with his philosophies is one thing, but acting out against him— helping those wretched witches seal him away— he won’t forget it. He stews in his rage, replays the moments of your treachery over and over again. He doesn’t blame you, he blames the witches. Those cowardly, despicable, rotten farces of gods. You are incredibly misguided by them, that’s all it is. You just need a little shove in the right direction, and once he escapes, he’ll happily provide that.

While Shadow Milk Cookie does not think you are at fault, he does believe that your actions warrant some sort of punishment. He pours himself over this during his imprisonment; ways to get back at you, make you suffer a little before he feels you’ve earned his forgiveness. Nothing he thinks of ever feels severe enough, there is nothing you could possibly do to mend his broken heart. (Perhaps if you stay by his side; spend the rest of eternity repenting and groveling, proving your loyalty and remorse, never estranging yourself from him again… maybe then, he’ll consider taking pity on you.)

After he breaks free from imprisonment, he’s all smiles and theatrics. Naturally, it’s a deceptive cover. Beneath his conniving grin is a deep-seated resentment. He tears the silver tree asunder with a manic smile and a burning desire for revenge. There are many things he intends to reclaim:

First of all, the other half of his soul jam.

He’ll run circles around that false little hero— as he finds that Pure Vanilla is surprisingly susceptible to corruption. It’s an excellent warm-up after laying dormant for so long, and Shadow Milk Cookie intends on enjoying every second of that thief’s descent into madness.

Then, once that’s out of the way, he’ll come for his silly, misguided, deceitful little lover next.

[odysseus-crewmate-number38]

the meg mccaffreyyy

[positivelyqueer]

what do you do when you’re tired of the fight?

you say: not again, no more, I can’t do this.

and you keep on living anyway.

[cecenyss]

I would really love it if Charlie saw Alastor’s pointless beefing with her dad and took it as an opportunity to force him to be more social.

Like she’d make a comment about how happy she is that her dad gets along with her friends, and she really appreciates that, and then Lucifer would give Alastor a smug look so Al would immediately start aggressively getting along with everybody else.

And Charlie is essentially manipulating Alastor into being a nicer person, and he is perfectly aware she’s doing it and it makes him even more angry.

Because there’s nothing he can do about it; either he accepts defeat to Lucifer and has to deal with his smug looks, or he plays nice with Charlie and has to deal with Charlie smiling at him brighter than usual, and there’s an obvious choice between the two of those.

And Lucifer of course has no idea any of this is happening. His daughter is using him to perform psychological warfare on his dad-nemesis and he’s so blinded by her compliments that he doesn’t even notice.

[poppy-metal]

the thing is if you broke patricks heart, it'd be so easy to get him back.... he truly is THE yearner of the trio like he'll put up a front and act like you're beneath him but the second you start telling him you miss him and you want him hes folding like a wet paper napkin. hes a stray dog desperate for love and attention from those that mean alot to him, once you're imprinted on his heart you have control over him - whether you know it or not.

[stitcherofchaos]

Kidnap Fam vs Earendil and Elwing controversy: Regarding the twins

Maybe I’m too practical-minded, but I see a lot of people either supporting or exaggerating kidnap fam, hating it with all their being, or ignoring the whole ‘love grew between them’ to translate into ‘emotional manipulation, hatred, resentment… etc (being anti-canon)’. I’ll respect opinions, frankly, I really could care less about them, but it does get irritating when people throw canon away for the drama (I certainly get annoyed when extreme pro-kidnap fams fans make it all sunshine and rainbows as if it wasn’t a difficult time or situation).

By the way, I can and will say that the twins can feel emotions, they are allowed to do that. Resentment and love can exist at the same time (for only a period of time) but one or the other must fade in order for the other the linger. One has to be consumed in order for the other to burn.

But just a thought, Elrond and Elros could love all of their parents equally, no more, no less than the others. One became a healer and the other, a king, I think they came to understand their foster father(s) and their bio-parents’ decisions.

(Ay maybe I just suck at emotions and all this feelings stuff and have no idea what I’m tolkien about)

And I’m not trying to call out or bash anyone!

I saw (and wanted to share) the quote,

“if your anger burns the furnace in your soul your whole life, you will be forever cold in the grave.”(I’m paraphrasing, I can’t remember the exact quote)

I cannot imagine Elrond or Elros being resentful to the point were they are vicious or unforgiving, whether it was towards Elwing, Eärendil, Maglor, or Maedhros (I really don’t think he was involved too much but if you swing that way).

I don’t want Elros to be cold in his grave, and I certainly don’t want Elrond's fëa to be burning for the rest of his immortal life.

Then I also had the thought, 'if the Fëanorians had never committed the third, worst, kinslaying, then Elwing would have never flown the Silmaril to her husband and they would have never gotten the help of the Valar.'

I personally headcanon that it was Eru’s work at hand to have Maglor raise Elrond and Elros. Think about it, what if they were spoiled in an alternate universe? What if something worse had happened to the twins? What if? What if?

What if they didn't become who they were meant to be if it wasn't for who they were raised by?

By the way, I read LOTR, I know Elrond refers to Eärendil publicly as his father and he makes no mention of Maglor. I analyzed this in three ways. 1.) Elrond must keep (the memory of) Maglor closed off, locked in his heart rather than talking about him more. 2.) It would've caused drama in his realm and in the counsel. 3.) Elrond really doesn't care, his father is his father, that's it. Zip. Maglor raised him, but Maglor is gone now. In a way, Eärendil is more present than Maglor in Elrond's life by the third age. Elrond can physically see the star, but he can't see Maglor.

I see it in the third way mostly. Eärendil is Elrond father, biologically, so why would he do this "My 'real' father" BS? It just seems like a waste of time. Tolkien probably didn't want to confuse anyone since the Silmarillion couldn't be published with LOTR.

Remind me of that quote from Yondu, "He may have been your father, boy, but he wasn't your daddy." But I really didn't want to refer to that quote considering Peter and Yondu's relationship is not the best example to compare this cluster of daddy issues to. Nevertheless, there is a point to be made in that statement. There is a difference between relation in regard to Nature vs Nurture, and the effects of it.

I guess the whole point of this post is, the fandom tends to take canon lore to the extreme or over analyze things to the point where they're just projecting. Trust me, I've been there, done that. I've learned my lesson (I think) and I wanted to share what I've learned.

Also (this is purely opinion) I don’t think Maglor was manipulative about anything, in the book, he just didn’t come off that way, for as little as he appeared, he actually seemed to be pretty optimistic (*regarding Eärendil) and honest (*the debate with Maedhros). He didn’t try to excuse himself or get the twins to pity him. Maglor raising the twins was out of pity/mercy, yes, but love grew (like what Tolkien said). He probably educated them on the facts and encouraged them to form their own opinions, whether that costed him their love or not. Maglor did have the more accurate moral compass compared to his brothers (in the end of the book!- Put down your pitchforks Maedhros stans!), especially if he knew that the Silmaril was better beyond their reach than where the enemy can also reach it. It was an accurate moral compass, although not a big one.

Argue, agree or disagree, or discuss with me! I want to hear different perspectives or opinions on this matter.

[pinkeoni]

Do you remember the first day that we met? It was... it was the first day of kindergarten. I knew nobody. I had no friends and... I just felt so alone, and so scared, but... I saw you on the swings, and you were alone too. You were just swinging by yourself. And I just walked up to you and... I asked. I asked if you wanted to be my friend. And you said yes. You said yes. It was the best thing I've ever done.

[jojo-the-bird]

I can’t bear to stand in a burning building and act like I’m enjoying the smell of burning wood as it consumes my lungs. I cannot, will not, love the crumbling walls around me and call it home.

[gipgalaron]

Misc. Abigail + Eltingville Club