#No wonder Nico felt like they wouldn’t accept him at camp

[poppitron360]

Umm… did we forget that, in Riordanverse canon, Hitler was a son of Hades?

[curseofdelos]

2 & 6 for ask game !

2. Hazel & Nico in Tartarus AU

This is exactly what it says on the tin lol. Hazel and Nico fall into Tartarus instead of Percy and Annabeth at the end of MOA. Not much I can say here without giving away my secrets, but I have a lot of fun ideas for this one I'm excited to send off into the world <3 Also it's just really fun writing a Hazel POV fic <3

A snippet:

Hazel climbed to her feet, and looked around. The glass beach stretched inland around fifty yards, and then dropped off the edge of a cliff. She didn’t think she would be gone from the Argo II this long so she didn’t have any supplies, and they both lost their swords in the fall. Hazel concentrated on stygian iron and imperial gold, and managed to find Nico’s sword a short walk down the beach, but her precious cavalry sword was lost on the bottom of the Cocytus.  She had no weapon, no food or water, no nectar or ambrosia or unicorn draught. She was utterly defenceless.  Fuck. Hazel walked back to where Nico was still sitting on the ground and offered him his sword, but Nico waved her away. “You keep it.” Hazel blinked in surprise. “What?” “I hate to admit it, but… the jar took a lot out of me. My powers are weakened, and my reflexes are way too slow. Out of the two of us, you’re better equipped to fight right now, so you should be the one with the sword.”  Hazel couldn’t believe it. Nico loved his sword. It was one of the only belongings she ever saw him carry. “Are you sure you want to go through Tartarus without a weapon?” Nico let out a short, bitter laugh. “Of course I don’t, but the only way we’re going to survive down here is if we strategize and make sacrifices. Right now, you’re the better fighter, so you get the sword. I want it back when we’re done, though.” “Of course.”  Hazel certainly wasn’t going to complain about having a weapon, and especially having this weapon. Nico had allowed her to hold his sword before, although she had never used it in a fight. It thrummed with a power unlike any other weapon she had ever wielded. There was something about the stygian iron that made her feel strong, powerful. No wonder Nico never let it out of his sight. She wouldn’t either if her cavalry sword felt like this. 

6. 10 years later

This is one of the first fics I started writing for this fandom back before I started publishing stuff last October, but basically I wanted to explore what happens to Greek demigods after they leave CHB because I refuse to believe that they all just. die young. It was going to be an exes-to-loves solangelo fic focusing on them meeting again ten years after they left camp, while also exploring the lingering trauma they have from their time at camp, their relationships to their powers, their identities as demigods, and who they are now/want to be in the future <3

Not going to go into too much detail because while I don't see myself finishing this particular fic, I do like the ideas and their dynamic still so I might recycle them for a different fic in the future, we'll see what happens lol

A snippet:

Will dropped the pillow from his face. “Yeah, another rejection.” He sighed, leaning back into the couch-part and stretching his legs out across the bed-part. “Apparently someone else got there first, and the landlord already accepted them, so it’s back to the drawing board I guess.” Austin smiled. “You’ll find somewhere. There’s plenty of real estate in New York.” “I know. I just feel bad for mooching off of y’all for so long.” Kayla emerged from the kitchen with two bowls of cereal and plopped down onto the couch-bed next to Will. “Yeah, it’s such a tragedy that we have to split our rent three ways instead of two,” she drawled, handing one of the bowls to him. “Please, Will. Leave soon so we can go back to paying more rent!” Will rolled his eyes as he accepted the bowl. “Do you have to eat that here? I don’t want your crumbs on my bed.” “You’re eating here!” “Yeah, but I don’t care if I get crumbs on my bed.” Kayla shoved his shoulder, but made no effort to get up, and instead made a show of settling in. “You’re not the boss of me anymore, Solace. My apartment, my rules.” She looked Will right in the eye and took a big, slow spoonful of her cereal.  “Also my apartment,” Austin added, watching them bicker in amusement as he ate as if they were some sort of dinner entertainment. “Seriously though. We don’t mind you staying here. It’s kind of like being back at camp again. It’s nice.”

[aiyaar]

Nico di Angelo was ten years old when his life went to hell. He never felt so devastated, so ruined. The only person who cared about him, his family, his everything was gone.

Nico hated all of them. He hated sister for leaving him behind, as if he was nothing, just to die afterwards and leave him completely alone. He hated those stupid huntresses of Artemis for taking his sister away from him. He hated Annabeth Chase, whoever it was, for falling off the cliff and making them go on this quest. But most of all he hated him. Percy Jackson. The ultimate hero, so strong and cool. He hated everything about him. He let him down. Percy Jackson let his sister die.

It was already a month since Bianca left this world. A lonely, cold month. Grieve still strangled him. This month has passed in a blur.

Nico passed an empty street, not even bothering to lift up his head. Snow was falling from the white sky and Nico shivered slightly from the cold. He needs to find some warmer clothes.

The city clock struck twelve, sound cutting through the silence. Another day has come. As if Nico cared. Suddenly he stopped, absentmindedly looking at the date on the billboard. 28th January.

Nico titled his head. He didn’t even know his birthday was coming. He always loved his birthday, so excited to modestly celebrate it with Bianca. Bianca…

A lonely tear rolled down his cheek, followed by another. Nico didn’t bother to wipe them, letting them fall.

“Happy Birthday to me.” He said in a shaky voice, sitting in the snow right in the middle of the street. Nico buried his face in his palms, trying to quiet down choked sobs.

Nico di Angelo was eleven years old when he lost himself.

*

Nico di Angelo was eleven when he started to chase the dream of making his sister come back to life. He was obsessed with the idea, almost going mad in the company of hurt and angry ghosts.

Minos had promised him that he’ll see Bianca again. And Nico believed. What else he could do. He was alone. He was hurt.

Why can’t she talk to him? Why she doesn’t want to show up? She doesn’t want to see him. She despises him. She doesn’t want him.

Nico heard rustling sound under his boots. He picked up the newspaper, catching the date with his eyes. 1st February.

Well, another year passed. Nico didn’t care that he missed his birthday. But a little ache didn’t want to leave his heart as he remembered how Bianca smiled at him the day he turned ten.

And then, months later, she showed up, just to say him that he has to let go. Just to make Nico know that this plan wouldn’t work. Minos was a liar. He used Nico. His only hope was trampled.

Misery was what Nico felt. The weird, nasty feeling crawled up to his throat.

Aside from that, one image didn’t want to leave his mind. His face lived in his head, not wanting to leave. His stupid smile, green eyes, tousled hair. Why Nico keeps thinking of him?

Why did she want to talk to him, not Nico? This stupid guy, with his annoying grin made Nico want to- What?

Nico freezed, trying to finish this though. Did Nico want to kill him? Hurt him? No, it was something else. He felt weird every time he heard his name. Percy Jackson.

Nico di Angelo was twelve when he started to realize something about himself.

*

Nico di Angelo was twelve when he wanted to rip out his own heart. Abnormal, disgusting. He was sick of himself. He felt nauseous at the very thought of it.

It can’t be true, no. He’s mistaken.

He was lying on his bed at his father’s castle, staring at the ceiling. He couldn’t sleep. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw his face. Those gorgeous green eyes, goofy smile, tousled black hair. His mind was ranting: Percy Jackson, Percy Jackson, Percy Jackson.

Nico felt like he was about to cry. Why is he like this? Is he broken?

He looked to the side, at his night table. A bouquet of red roses stood there. An hour ago Persephone strode to his room with these flowers and a weird expression on her face. She silently put them in a vase and went back to the door. She stopped there, turning her head a little to look at him.

“Happy Birthday.” Was what she said. Then she left.

So it was his birthday. He’s thirteen now.

Nico stared at the flowers, a little bit shocked. She remembered about his birthday. His father didn’t even bother to check up on him.

Hades only cared about their deal. Nico was very hesitant about that. But after all, he agreed.

He just thought that if he does that then maybe Percy would… Like him? But he didn’t.

Percy Jackson hated him. He screwed everything up. It was horrible. He had to fix it.

So he did the best thing he could. He had to prove to Percy, to his father, to everyone that he is worth something. He was just a kid and the battle was scary. He was scared. But he was a hero.

Everyone respected him, some people wanted to be his friends. He even wanted to stay at camp. Nico was happy but only for a moment.

Days after the battle the whole camp started talking about how Percy and Annabeth finally kissed and got together.

Nico left without a warning. Not like he had anyone to warn. Not like anyone cared.

Nico di Angelo was thirteen when his heart was broken.

*

Nico di Angelo was thirteen when Percy Jackson had gone missing. Annabeth Chase went feral. And Nico promised to help. Of course he did.

He was actually worried. What could happen to him? Nico only knew that Percy was alive. It was somewhat reassuring.

Something bad was about to happen. Nico knew it. New demigods at Camp Half-Blood. One of them is a son of Zeus. That was a bad sign.

And now that Nico knows about romans…

Today was 28th January. His birthday. He already got used to ignore this day. Nico just marked the fact that he was fourteen now.

The door of his room swung open. Nico sat up on his bed, seeing his father in his usual black robes.

He stood there in silence for a minute or so, awkwardly staring at his son.

“Um, did you want something?” Nico said, nervously fumbling with the ring on his finger.

“Yes.” Hades came closer to his bed. “Well, not really. It’s just…” Lord of the Underworld sat on the corner of Nico’s bed. “It’s your birthday.”

Nico blinked, processing what his father was trying to say.

“Yeah, I know. Thank you for reminding me.” He finally said, scowling at his father. Like he ever cared about Nico anyway. “If that’s all you wanted to say-“

“No.” Hades looked strangely awkward. “You made me proud this year, you know?”

Nico’s eyes widened. Was his father trying to praise him?

“I wanted to say that I’m… Grateful. You made me make right choice. And what I said about you before… I’m sorry.”

Nico was more than shocked at this point. He felt awkward and Hades didn’t look better.

“Anyway, I vaguely know that mortals usually make gifts for the day one came from mother’s womb. And I thought that maybe you should spend time with your… peers?”

“What are you trying to say, dad?”

Hades took a deep breath, as if he was nervous.

“I want to give you a present. So that you will be able to go wherever you want, in those places where teenagers usually spend time.”

“You want to give me a car?” Nico asked, puzzled.

“No, you’re too young for that. I’ll give you a chauffeur, he’ll be helping you go to the mall or something. Because, well… I’m not able to do it for you.”

Nico blinked again, titling his head to the side.

“A chauffeur?”

Hades looked embarrassed for a moment. Then he put on a stern expression, standing up.

“Objections are not accepted. You should be grateful.” He strode off to the door. Then he stopped. “Happy Birthday, son.” He closed the door, leaving Nico alone in the dark room.

Nico di Angelo was fourteen when he received his first birthday present.

*

Nico di Angelo was fourteen when he met him. Will Solace.

It felt like a dawn after long, cold night. Will was his blessing, his salvation. And Nico didn't know what did he do to deserve someone like Will.

They've been dating for a couple of months, wonderful, amazing months. And Nico was genuinely thankful for everything Will had done to him.

Nico woke up at the knock on his door, blinking through the gloom of Hades cabin. He didn't know if it was morning already, because black curtains prevented any gleam of sunshine from crawling into his cabin.

Still, Nico knew exactly that it was early and he knew exactly who was outside, because there was only one person in this world who dared to wake him up.

Nico got out of bed and staggering came to open up the door.

Will Solace stood on the threshold. He was wearing his usual winter jacket and a scarf, a blinding smile on his face. He seemed to be particularly happy today and, judging by the flush on his face, he was running.

"Hey, Neeks." He ruffled his hair and came in, closing the door behind him as Nico shivered from the cold winter air.

"Good morning." Nico mumbled, still half asleep. "What time is it?"

"7 a.m."

"Why did you need to wake me up so early?"

Will looked him in the eyes, taking Nico’s cold hand with his warm one, which is weird, considering Will was the one who had a walk on winter air.

"Do you know what day it is?" He looked excited.

"Um, no, to be honest. I don't pay attention to the calendar." Nico sat down on his bed, wrapping himself in a blanket.

Will looked shocked.

"Are you serious?! I mean... It's 28th January!"

Nico's brain needed a moment to process what exactly Will wanted from him.

"Yeah. So?"

"So?! It's your birthday!"

Nico sighed.

"Guess I'm fifteen now. That also explains this." He pointed to his bedside table, where black envelope was perched on the top of black box. "Probably from my father."

Will looked at him, then at the envelope.

"So, like... Happy Birthday."

"Thank you." Nico got up again, reaching for the box. "Now go so I can change."

"Ok." Will strode off to the door, a strange expression on his face. Though Nico didn't pay much attention to it.

Nico opened the envelope. There was a thick wad of money and an invitation for a dinner. Nico will come, of course, but not today. In the box lay watches and a book in Italian.

The day went by as usual. Nico had a walk in the woods with Will before breakfast, then they were busy with their camp activities.

In the evening, right before they were about to go to the campfire, Will took his arm and told him.

"How about we won't go to the campfire today?"

"But you like-"

"I don't need to go there everyday. Especially today. Come to your cabin in twenty minutes." And he hastily strode off in the direction of the cabin thirteen.

Nico came in after twenty minutes to be met with dozens of candles around his room. Will was standing in front of him, holding a cake with fifteen lighted candles perched on it.

"Make a wish." He whispered as Nico came closer.

Nico looked him in the eyes and didn't know what to say. So he just did what he was told. Will smiled brighter.

"I baked it myself." He said proudly. "Well, Cecil helped me."

He put the cake on the table, now fumbling in his pockets.

"I have something for you, actually." He said, pulling out a small box from his pocket. "I don't know if you're going to like it but..."

Nico didn't hear what Will was saying as he opened the box with trembling hands. He pulled out a sun pendant on a thin gold chain. The sun looked just like the tattoo on Will's shoulder.

Nico couldn't hold back a tear that rolled down his cheek. Will watched him attentively, stopping his ranting when he saw it.

"Nico, what's wrong-"

The next thing Will knew, pale arms was wrapped tightly around him, Nico's face buried in Will's chest.

"Thank you." Nico said in a small, shaky voice before pulling back. He placed the sun pendant on his palm, watching it glisten in the candle light. Tears still rolled down his cheeks.

Will looked at him, his eyes filled with warmth and understanding. He always understood. His sunshine was so alone, for so long. All Will wanted was to make him happy.

Will moved to embrace Nico in a tight hug, kissing the top of his head and then lifted his head with long, gentle fingers on his chin.

"I love you so much." He said. "You're such an amazing person. You're brave, gorgeous, smart, brilliant. Beautiful." He wiped the tear from Nico's cheek. "I will love you with all my might. I promise."

And with that he gently kissed Nico, making him smile while the tears of joy kept rolling down his cheeks.

"I love you, Will."

Nico di Angelo was fifteen when he found his happiness.

[0littlestwolf0]

Straight to Hell Pt. 2

Ship: Percy Jackson x Reader

Warnings: just a bit of crying towards the end.

Requested by: @msmissinghome

Author note: I swear I wanted to put a fight scene at the end, but I just couldn’t shake this thought that if I managed to get out of Tartarus, on my own, and then be hugged by Percy I would cry all my fears out. I’m sorry it took me so long, I tried to find a better ending.

Also @tobios-shawty here’s part two! I hope you like it!

Silence was a funny companion.

It had a way to make you uneasy, to creep inside your skin and force you to destroy it, to scream it away or to laugh your way through it.

Percy thought he would never be a prey to silence, after all, it was always the apocalypse around him, someone was always fighting (him for the most part), chasing, or running.

But right now, deep in the shadows, he couldn’t catch a single noise, he could barely register his grip on the back of Nico’s jacket as he shadow-traveled them.

What was that place supposed to be anyways?

Or, better yet,

How in Hades did Nico manage to find a path through it?

He didn’t know, and it didn’t matter much to him at the moment, his senses, his brain, his entire body was only focused on finding you, on getting you back.

Maybe on another circumstances he would’ve thought about how that same dark landscape would probably make for some really nasty nightmares, and yet, he doubted he would even remember it.

He was just finally adjusting at the darkness when the light came back, dazzling him.

And then Nico was on the floor, barely able to pull himself to his knees and hands, breathing heavily.

Percy took a calculated look around him, his right hand gripping Riptide tightly, he didn’t recognize his surroundings, but as far as he could tell, there were no monsters in sight “What happened? Are we there yet?”

The king of ghosts only replied with a sneer and a roll of his eyes

“What is that supposed to mean?” Percy asked as a sudden, all-too-familiar rage filled him, he couldn’t waste any more time, because what if you made it and he wasn’t there? You would’ve walked through Hell only for him to not comply on his side, not opening the doors on his side.

“Asshole” Nico mumbled “The doors are in Greece” he said as if it explained everything, Percy looked around, and even though the surroundings were new, probably somewhere in Italy, it wasn’t Greece.

“We aren’t in Greece yet” Percy added, the rage filling his every word with venom.

“We were just in Manhattan! Traveling here took almost all of my strength!” Nico yelled, breathing between words, and only in that moment did Percy fully acknowledge him, the bloody nose, panting, even the shaking.

He felt as though he was being stabbed with guilt over and over again, the entirety of his situation made his eyes water, but he forced the tears away rapidly, he didn’t deserve to cry, he scolded himself, besides, that would do nothing to either save you nor help Nico.

“I’m sorry” he apologized wholeheartedly “I’m just-“

“I know, just shut up and let me regain my strength so we can get to her” he cut right through his words

Percy bit his tongue until he felt a metallic taste and nodded, his eyes skipping trough the town they were in until something clicked, a building with very specific windows

“I know this place-“ he whispered to himself, trailing off at the end, there was no way he’d been there, and he didn’t have social media or watch enough TV to recognize it from anywhere.

Nico rolled his eyes again “I said-“ he trailed off looking at the same building “oh”

“Oh?” Percy repeated “You know this place?”

Of course he did, Percy rationalized, he’d probably been there before, but then again, why did Percy felt like he knew it too? Maybe some type of deja vu?

“You don’t?” Was Nico’s answer “She has a photo of this place that she parades with her wherever she goes, you must’ve seen it”

Oh, now the son of the sea understood the sentiment.

“I did, but she never really told me about this place”

Nico scoffed “Well of course she didn’t! She hated being here”

Percy had figured that much, you never talked about your childhood more than strictly necessary, sometimes even going out of your way to drive any conversation away from that topic.

But,

“Why?” He didn’t realized he wondered out loud.

“Her mortal parent, for starters, abandoning her” Percy realized Nico still looked angry, but now the anger wasn’t directed at him “forcing her to raise herself from childhood until she was taken to camp”

Still, it worried him further, that anger he was escaping was directed at one person that should’ve been close to you, someone who you should’ve relied on that abandoned you, pretty much like he thought he was doing by not being there with you already.

Gods he needed you.

But, he’d get you back, and once he did, he’d never let go of you again.

The resolve compressed his heart a little, but he accepted the feeling, from now on, you’d have someone to rely on that would never let you down.

That, he was willing to swear on the Styx.

***********

Had it been entire days or mere hours you just couldn’t tell.

Nothing really changed in Tartarus from the second you fell in, nothing but the multitude of monsters hunting you down.

Trying to track down the first demigod they’d seen since being killed by, most likely, another demigod just like you.

But your resolution never once wavered, you were getting out, one way or another, you hid until you had slaughtered one of them, not quite killing, just creating a gush big enough to sprinkle some ichor in your clothes, enough to change your scent but not so much as to tear through the entirety of the fabric.

Eventually, with a new limp, and a few ugly wounds that would soon enough turn into ugly scars, you got to the door.

A heavy sigh left you, and suddenly you became an anxious mess altogether What if Percy hadn’t made it? What if they finally realized that you didn’t belong with them? That after all you were still just walking anxiety coated on fear and deep rooted issues?

Maybe they’d finally realized that they’d be better off without-

No

You couldn’t allow yourself to keep thinking like that, you couldn’t give up on yourself because knowing them, they wouldn’t give up on you.

It was Percy Jackson for crying out loud! He wouldn’t give up on anyone! Less of all you.

So, with a burning throat after swallowing your fears and an ever growing tremble on your body did you step on the elevator.

And you waited.

And waited.

The fear was eating you whole when you felt it beginning to move.

You forced yourself to stand up, leaning against a corner for support and taking a hold of your weapon.

Then the doors open and you lunged forward, wanting nothing more than to get as further away from the entrance as you could.

“Whoa!” Exclaimed a voice you knew too well as your blue-green-eyed boy held your face

His eyes were finally letting go of all the tears he managed to contain, denying himself to even blink in case you’d disappear, he knew it was a stupid fear to have, but still, he wouldn’t dare to take the chance.

Suddenly you were pressed against his trembling body, it was a good match, you realized, with the both of you shaking there was a strange sense of stability.

“You’re okay, you’re here” he kept mumbling against your hair, over and over like a mantra or a prayer you couldn’t tell, it took you a moment to realize he was talking to himself.

“I’m out” was all you could say, a broken voice finding a way out of your closed off throat, it was funny how before that moment you’d wholeheartedly believed that your first thought after getting out would’ve been Percy.

It wasn’t.

Your first thought was how incredibly stupid you had been for jumping in the first place, I mean, of course you’d do it again but the matter at hand was that it was a very stupid move from your part.

Going to Tartarus? Where a thousand bloodthirsty monsters (who by the way had been killed by your kin) were? Poisoned air and burning rivers? The odds had been against you from the moment you landed!

By all means you shouldn’t have survived.

But you did, and finally all the tears you had suppressed came to life, Percy held you with unwavering arms as his own legs gave up and the both of you landed on your knees.

He held you as you screamed and yelled between tears, as you sobbed so much he thought you’d have an attack, because you were out of the woods now, all the fear and anger you suppressed could finally come out.

You hit him a few times but that was okay, he only held you tighter as his own sobbing became loud, breaking out all the way from his chest.

At some point in all the crying you felt an extra pair of arms around you, your first instinct made you stiffen until you saw black eyes full of worry, then you began crying again, and so did he.

Because now you were safe.

[thebigqueer]

After hearing about how Nico was treated on the Argo II, I wonder how Will feels about/ interacts with the seven. I like to imagine them all being friends bc it's more fun, but I also don't think William "nobody hits my boyfriend" Solace would take kindly to people who treated Nico like dogshit

Okay, THIS.

I think the way that Will feels about the seven is kind of dependent on how Nico feels about them.

I mean, I think Will and Annabeth were pretty good friends for a while, but when he realizes how even she was pretty rude to Nico, he feels a little indifferent to her. Still sees her as a friend, but hates how she kind of gave two faces to two different people.

But I think to really get down to how Will feels about them, it’s important to analyze how Nico probably thought about them after the quest was done and over with.

I have no doubt that he felt really upset by the way he was treated and felt like an outcast. And for a while after the summer he returns to camp, he’s probably still angry about it, too. And he has absolutely every right to be.

But I think as time progresses for the next few months following the battle at Camp Half Blood in BoO, Nico’s main goal is to focus on himself and to just breathe and let go. He’s held things in for too long. It’s time to release and grow.

He’s still upset about it. But he learns to let go. Not necessarily forgive, but just relieve it from his conscience. It helps him a lot in the long-run, because now he’s just taking more time to understand himself, what he likes, what he wants to do. Just learn about him.

As for Will... at first, when everyone returns to camp, Will is totally in awe of everyone. Like, these are the kinds of heroes you’ll hear about for centuries. Who wouldn’t be excited to be in their presence?

When Will learns about the way they treated Nico later, though, as Nico and Will get closer, of course he’s angry. What right did they have to judge Nico that way just because he was “SOOOO SCARY”? And he knows how even the entire camp was kinda bad to Nico too for most of the time. So, yes, he’s angry. Nico doesn’t deserve any of that - no one does.

But Nico talks him through it, let’s him know that he’s trying to move on. “I’m only telling you this because I think it helps me to admit it to someone else,” he says. “So, please, I know you’re angry, but don’t lash out on them. I’m telling you because I trust you. And they’re growing, too. Sometimes being a demigod can be hard.”

So generally Will has like a grudging acceptance to the Argo II group. If Nico is letting go, then there’s not much point for Will to latch onto an issue of the past. He’s angry, but he tampers down that anger for Nico because he knows his boyfriend wouldn’t want him to be upset on Nico’s behalf while he’s just trying to stop thinking about it. This is Nico’s feelings and Nico’s fight; Will doesn’t need to talk for Nico at all. He’s just glad Nico trusts him with this.

The people that he’s outright nice to are probably just Hazel, Jason, and Reyna (even though she’s not technically part of the Seven, but she was fairly important), because Nico definitely explains that they’re some of the first people to totally accept him.

He’s nice to them for the most part, but everytime he has a conversation with one of them, he makes it known that he’s on Nico’s side.

I think Nico actually talks to some of the Argo II members after a few months and discusses things with them and how he felt, and they apologize and Nico learns to forgive. When they do that, only then does Will relent a little. Even then, he’s still a bit guarded, but he forgives if Nico wishes to forgive as well.

Thank you for the ask!! That was so interesting to think about!

[delta-roseblr]

Hi sweetie! I want to ask for a prompt about Cecil and Lou Ellen talking about the cute guy that he met. Thank you!

What? It's like three years later but I didn't forget!

Enjoy!

Cecil had just collapsed in his bunk, ready to sleep the day away in hopes of shaking the lingering effects of shadow travel. The sounds of quick footsteps entered the cabin. The Hermes cabin was a busy place being one of the largest cabins, so noise wasn't anything Cecil wasn't used to sleeping through. Even though it was the middle of the day, it wasn't uncommon for one of his siblings to come or go, so Cecil didn't even think anything of it until someone dropped next to him on his bunk.

He groaned in hopes that would be enough to get the person away. It wasn't a long shot, so he wasn't surprised when the person chuckled, patted his back, and didn't leave, but he was a little disappointed.

"So, how was Tennessee?" Lou Ellen asked, apparently ignoring the fact that Cecil was trying to sleep. That was pretty on-brand for Lou, and considering she was Cecil's best friend, he couldn't complain, although, at the moment, he wanted to. "What's Will's mom like?" She continued in that rapid-fire way that she had mastered over the years, "Were Will and Nico just making out the entire time? Did you see Felix and Dean? Were Felix and Dean making out the whole time too?"

Cecil didn't move, but he did crack open one eye to look up at his friend. "Lou, that was a lot of questions without breathing," he pointed out without enthusiasm, "How are you not out of breath?”

"Years of practice," Lou replied with a shrug. "Are you going to answer?"

Cecil was still a little woozy from Nico's shadow traveling him back to camp and tired from the whole trip, and he considered telling her no he wasn’t going to answer. He considered telling her he didn’t want to talk right that second because, in general, it wasn't the safest idea to tell a daughter of Hecate no. The chance that Lou would have accepted that answer and let him sleep was slim, and Cecil wasn't THAT tired.

"Which question?" he asked in a somewhat exaggerated grumbly voice to get across the point that he had been trying to sleep.

"Don't be difficult, Cecil!" Lou Ellen huffed, "How was your trip?"

That was a loaded question, not that Lou would know that. Still, Cecil couldn't help but smile a little to himself as he thought about it. "It was kind of great," he admitted, his voice still half muffled from his cheek being pressed against his bunk.

There was a short pause. That was an uncommon thing for Lou Ellen and a clear indication that he had managed to take her by surprise. "Great?" she asked uncertainly.

"Um, yeah," Cecil replied. Lou Ellen's uncertainty was catching because Cecil found himself wondering if that was the proper adjective. The uncertainty lasted only a few seconds before the memories assured Cecil that it was pretty great. He lifted his head a little and actually met Lou's gaze. "Why?"

"Not the adjective I was expecting," She admitted with a shrug, "I mean, I love Will and everything…."

She left the rest of the sentence to go unsaid, but Cecil got it. Will was genuinely fucking awesome, but he was a total fixer. It came from being in the infirmary all the time, literally fixing people. If you came to Will with a problem or just some heavy thoughts, he wanted to fix it for you. That wasn't a bad thing. Actually, it was awesome a lot of the time, but sometimes you weren't looking for things to be fixed or getting a pep talk, and then Will didn't know what to do with himself. Traveling with Will and Nico also came with the extra fun of being with the cutest, most in love gay couple on the planet. Good for them and all, but when you're currently trying to deal with your own feeling about being gay and work your way out of the closet, that can bring on some feelings.

"It was just nice to get away from camp," he explained. Being a year-round camper, Cecil didn't get to leave camp often, and even when he did (and it wasn't for a battle), it was just day trips to the city. "And Will's mom is a really good cook," he continued honestly. It wasn't the same as the food the nymphs put together at camp but still just as good, and she was always checking in to make sure that everyone had enough food. Her maternal energy was just soothing.

Cecil gave up on sleep, at least for the moment, and turned over to fully look at Lou Ellen because she wasn't going anywhere. "Felix said hi," he informed. It was sort of a perfect statement because it was true, and Lou would get a kick out of it and because it could get her on to another topic. He was sure something happened around camp that she wanted to talk about since he was gone.

"That's nice," Lou Ellen commented without the enthusiasm that Cecil had been expecting. Worse yet, after that, she fell silent, and her expression turned more and more suspicious with each passing second.

A sense of pressure increased with each passing second of silence, and it didn't take Cecil long before he hit the point where he couldn't take it anymore. He let out a nervous laugh despite himself and asked, "What?"

"Did you hook up with someone?" She asked as she continued to stare at him like she was trying to read his mind.

Cecil would freely admit that Lou Ellen knew him better than just about anyone but even he didn't know how she had gotten so close to the truth of the thing. She wasn't dead on because he hadn't actually hooked up with anyone, just a kiss - a truly life-changing, amazing kiss, but she was so close. Cecil honestly didn't know what he had said or done to give it away.

Usually, he would jokingly accuse Lou Ellen of reading his mind, but he wasn't sure he really wanted to do that. He wasn't even sure if he wanted to talk about it. In some sense, he absolutely did. A hot guy kissed him; why wouldn't he want to talk about that? But on the other hand, he was still sort of unpacking his feelings about getting kissed by a guy he probably would never see again. Sure, Cecil gave Kyle his number (because Lou Ellen had made him take a phone), but that didn't mean he would call or text him.

Okay, technically, Kyle had already texted him a few times before Cecil left Tennessee, but that still didn't mean anything.

Cecil sat up completely before attempting to counter with something resembling a denial. "What?" he asked, trying to sound surprised and a little confused rather than nervous. He wasn't sure if he was successful at that, which considering he was dealing with Lou Ellen didn't bode particularly well for him, but he didn't see a better option than committing to the plan. "Why would you even think that?"

Lou Ellen still managed to look suspicious even as she arched a dismissive eyebrow at him. "Because your trip was great," she explained with a level of finality that seemed misplaced considering.

"That seems thin," Cecil pointed out.

Lou Ellen huffed with annoyance and rolled her eyes hard enough. If she were anyone else, Cecil would have been sure she had hurt herself. "Cecil, I figured out you were gay before you did," she reminded, "I know you better than you know yourself."

Cecil loved Lou Ellen, he did, and weirdly he appreciated that she forced him to face his sexuality even if it had been hard at the time, but he wished she wouldn't bring it up so much. It always brought him back to a weird place. He probably could have just said that to Lou Ellen, but it was always hard to tell how she would take things. At times she would accept it at face value and never bring it up again, and at other times she would make it a big fucking deal. He would rather avoid the latter if he could.

"When are we going to get past that?" he questioned as casually as he could manage.

Luckily or maybe not (it did depend on how you looked at it), Lou Ellen remained focused on the information she was trying to extract from Cecil. "Just accept it," She dismissed with a simple wave of her hand, "Now spill, because I want details."

"Lou," Cecil protested but came out sounding a little like a whine.

"Cecil," Lou declared, sounding very much like a parent preparing to reprimand a naughty child, "I will beat them out of you if I need to."

Cecil accepted his fate with a loud huff and a roll of his eyes. "I didn't hook up with anyone," he corrected before adding, "But I did sort of meet someone."

"Oh, my gods!" Lou Ellen exclaimed before clapping and jumping a little where she sat as a show of excitement, "Details, Cecil!"

Cecil could feel the heat creeping up his neck and toward his face. He knew in a matter of seconds his face would be bright red. "Lou, there isn't much to tell," he muttered bashfully. There wasn't much to tell, so he wasn't lying exactly, but it had felt like something as nothing as it was. It had forced him to come out to Will, so that was something. Lou would make it into so much more, and she would have so many questions that Cecil hadn't even thought of and definitely would not have answers to.

Lou Ellen let out one of her long, overly dramatic sighs. "I'm assuming this someone has a name," she pointed out with one of her looks, "And you met him somewhere."

Okay, so yes, Cecil didn't want to answer big philosophical questions about his sexuality and sexual attraction, but at the same time, there was part of him that did want to talk about it because he met a boy. Not just a boy, but a hot boy who had seemed interested in him.

Even though he knew it was a trap of sorts, Cecil couldn't resist the urge to gush at least a little. "Oh, his name is Kyle," he answered. He couldn't help but smile just saying the name. It reminded Cecil of Kyle, and Kyle was something worth smiling about. "I met him at a gay bar."

"You WENT to a gay bar!?!" Lou Ellen exclaimed with complete and utter outrage.

"Oh, ya yeah," Cecil admitted. He probably should have figured Lou would be bothered by that. Not that they went but that she wasn't there to join them. He and Will were probably going to pay for that slip at some point, but he could do nothing about that now. "Will and Nico went because Dean and Felix were going, I think," he offered as an explanation.

"So, all of my gays went to a gay bar without me," Lou Ellen summarized with clear displeasure, "I'm a little hurt, can't lie."

Cecil was careful not to be too obvious about rolling his eyes as he apologized without any real sincerity, "Sorry." Lou Ellen made too big of a deal about things sometimes. It didn't come from a bad place, so he didn't see the point of calling her out on it. Still, it wasn't like he or Will ever made such a big deal about Lou being bisexual.

"No," Lou Ellen dismissed, apparently either unaware or ignoring the fact that his apology was anything but genuine. "If you met someone, it's fine," She assured before turning to look at Cecil with that excited glint back in her eyes, "So did your eyes meet over the dance floor or what?"

That is exactly how Cecil had imagined that sort of thing in the past, but remembering the actual guy bar they had gone to, the thought made him cringe a little. "Um, no," he answered instead of explaining that most of the guys at the bar were way too old for him. "He came with Dean and Felix," he explained, "I think he is a friend of Felix from school."

"Why am I not surprised?" Lou Ellen declared with a chuckle, "Felix is like the ultimate wingman!"

Cecil didn't really get why Lou Ellen got along so well with Felix. He was pretty sweet to Dean, but with everyone else, he could be a little abrasive. He could understand why Will hadn't gotten along with him more, but Cecil might have been biased because of what had happened. "Yeah, Felix sort of yelled at me," he told Lou Ellen. He didn't know why he was lightening the blow because there wasn't much question on if Felix yelled at him or not. He definitely yelled and cussed a fair amount. "I don't think he was cool with a demigod potentially flirting with his friend."

Lou Ellen's eyebrows furrowed momentarily, and Cecil wasn't sure if it was from concern or confusion. He didn't have much time to figure it out before it was just gone and replaced with an expression much more familiar coming from Lou Ellen, unwavering confidence. "What does Felix know? Don't worry about that," She dismissed with a wave of her hand. Cecil doubted even she would have been so confident if she had heard Felix's angry tirade. He might not have been a demigod, but Felix had Cecil hesitate for his safety.

Cecil thought about saying as much to Lou Ellen, but she didn't really give him a chance. "So, you were flirting?" Lou questioned with excitement in her voice as she bounced excitedly where she sat.

If Cecil's cheeks weren't burning before, they definitely were hearing that question. "I don't know," he muttered with a sheepish shrug. Part of him didn't want to say it because it felt like an almost private thing, but part of him honestly wasn't sure. He had never really been good at flirting, at least not the times he cared to try. He just got nervous and sort of bumbled the whole thing. Kyle was cute, and he had made Cecil nervous. Cecil had wanted to flirt, and he had thought he kind of was, but without the usual bumbling, he couldn't be sure. Maybe he had been doing it wrong. "Maybe."

"Okay," Lou Ellen dragged out the word before letting out a little annoyed puff of air. "I love you, but you are by far the most frustrating person ever," she declared as she shook her head in disappointment.

"What? What did I say?" Cecil questioned with genuine confusion.

"Nothing," Lou Ellen dismissed, although she still sounded somewhat disappointed. "Let's backtrack a little," she declared, "What's the guy's name?"

As much as he tried, Cecil couldn't help but smile as he uttered the name, "Kyle."

"M’kay," Lou Ellen nodded and smiled. Apparently, Cecil was back on the track Lou Ellen wanted him to be on. "And what does he look like, and if you want to objectify him a little by rating his general hotness, I will support you."

Cecil's stomach did a little flip just at the thought. Kyle was so good-looking, and Cecil could probably go on for days talking about just how hot he was, but that was sort of embarrassing. Or at least he felt a little awkward about it. Maybe it would be better to stick to the facts and not wax poetic. "Um…well, he's….um, average height, has dark red hair, and green eyes," he began.

"And did he rob your convenient store?" Lou Ellen interrupted with the tone of an absolutely exasperated woman. "Gods, Cecil! I'm not drawing a wanted poster here, you can talk with a little enthusiasm!"

Cecil could have been more enthusiastic if he talked to anyone else, but with Lou Ellen, it just felt a little weird. They had dated, and sure they had both agreed to break up and all of that, but it still made Cecil feel weird about some things at times. He couldn't gush about how hot Kyle was with her. He just wasn't there yet. "He used to play football, so he's…..um….in really good shape," Cecil explained.

"Oh, my gods, he's a beefcake!" Lou Ellen explained before reaching out and slapping him lightly on the arm, "I didn't realize that was your type!"

"I wouldn't say it's my type," Cecil muttered. His face was so hot he absolutely could not understand how he hadn't just exploded from it. Cecil had never thought he had a type, but Kyle definitely would have been it if he did. So maybe beefcakes were his thing.

[the-ghost-king]

time for me to share a good™️ headcanon: will and nico love to steal each other’s clothes but their massive size difference makes it so obvious that they’re doing it. nico’s shirts are almost croptops on will and will’s sweaters are practically a dress on nico bc will is like 6’2 and nico’s like 5’5

Anon! Anon! Yes, you. You get it.

I don’t really know what you wanted as a response to this but I felt inspired for the first time in some 10 months so I gifted you a one shot below the “read more”. I’ll also upload it to Ao3 with a link in the notes...

Anyhow Anon, I hope you enjoy it! I got a little off topic but reflective fluff is always good!

If you would have asked Will what he wanted out of life as a kid you probably would have gotten an answer that was something like “a chance to actually go and live life as it was meant to be” or maybe “to be happy, pretty, and stupid”. 

He didn’t dare to hope for more, demigods didn’t live long lives, and being involved in a major battle at thirteen didn’t do wonders in regards to establishing confidence in your survival. As for the “pretty and stupid” part of his answer, it wasn’t that Will had ever hated being smart, he just hated the disconnect different intelligence levels caused in peer groups and society; being smart was hard, sure for school purposes it was nice, but that intelligence means you’re constantly thinking and so often so much of the world seems so dull and petty. Will had been lucky enough to be blessed with decent looks, moving through the world was made easy in at least that regard, but he wished he could live without thinking so much because so often he could only see so much awful in the world. 

Thirteen year old Will wouldn’t have dared hope for anything more, he wouldn’t have dared hope for anything else more than a decade or so of normal life beyond camp and a chance at an easy life for those few years. When fourteen year old Will got a depression diagnosis he wouldn’t say he was surprised, he would have been annoyed but he hadn’t really felt much of anything in years. (”Atypical depression” The doctor had said, “likely clinical”)  A few different types of anti-depressants and a few months of therapy things started feeling okay, better at least. Fifteen came and went, he tried to go off the pills and didn’t quite get there, but his dose got lowered which Will supposed was nice. 

In the months of early 16, Nico di Angelo stumbles into his life; exhausted and melting under the pressure of the universe, he makes friends with death. It isn’t much, but Will remembers him from when they were kids back before any major fights. He remembers hearing about Nico running off and he felt bad for not having made a continued effort to get to know him. He felt bad when he left after the Battle of Manhattan too, they’d prepped bodies for their departure together and Will had gotten hung up in the infirmary (he had been one of the last Apollo campers and he was the only one with medical training). In some ways, Will supposed he was making up for those lost years when he didn’t have time to befriend Nico as he would have liked, it made him feel like he was at least trying.

In the beginning things were undeniably rocky, Nico was constantly hooked to machines just so Will could guarantee he wouldn’t die overnight. Even on Nico’s first night in the infirmary he had struggles with sleep, the bed wasn’t comfortable enough and after trying a large variety of options Will had hauled Nico and all of his equipment out to the porch on the back of the infirmary and they slept there for those three days (which turned into two weeks), wrapped up in jackets and in a pile of blankets beneath camp’s fall skies.

Within a few months, they fell in love. 

Okay listen, people can call Will ridiculous all they want- but love at first sight is real and he experienced it. He didn’t know it but the day he met Nico and looked into the dark browns of his eyes, he thought something about how his eyes looked like ash from the fireplace at Mama’s house, or how they looked like the soil that his windowsill plants grew from. If you would have asked Will what he thought of Nico the very first time they’d met, he would have told you something about how his eyes were “big, dark, and round like a baby cow”. What Will really meant is that Nico reminded him of the family ranch house he grew up in, he meant he looked like home. 

At the time Will just hadn’t known that was what love felt like, but when he figured it out one day teaching Nico how to play Hold ‘em on the back porch of the infirmary with a light breeze and setting sun as they settles down for bed; he knew one thing, he didn’t want anything more than to make Nico happy and he hoped that he could be a part of that more than anything.

It took a little longer for Nico to come around, he had his own demons to battle. Internalized homophobia, even in small doses, is a real downer to say the least, let alone when you’re fighting demons you’ve manifested for some 15 years. The biggest struggle however, was probably in all honesty the fact that Nico was so goddamned oblivious. After spending years alone with limited human contact at best, and having spent so many years desperately wanting Percy to notice him, and being met with negative reactions, Nico didn’t know what love looked like anymore. How had he been supposed to know he was in love with Will?

There was a lot of subtle back and forth, would the other even be interested in a guy? It ended one day with an unplanned kiss followed by a declaration. Will called it the best mistake he ever made, neither of them really thought it was a mistake.

It was days like today that only proved that.

Will had woken up to Nico’s face on a pillow next to him. He’d fallen asleep with his hair pulled back in a ponytail, and some of his smaller hairs had fallen loose in the night and now framed his peaceful face. The first rays of golden sunlight fell through accidentally left open curtains, and Will reached out to brush a stray piece of dark hair and place it behind Nico’s ear. 

He woke up to a morning more beautiful than he would have ever hoped for at 13, and he would always be glad for that. He would always be grateful for how far he had come in not quite a decade. At just twenty-two he was 4 years into medical school, and three years married to Nico and he truly believed he was one of the happiest men in the world simply because he made Nico happy.

In time, Nico too would wake up. 

First with a huff, and then a grumbling noise of annoyance as he rubbed his face with his arm as though trying to block out light before half-asleep Nico seemed to accept his fate and wake up fully. 

“Good morning”

“How long have you been up?”

“Awhile”

Nico made a knowledgeable humming sound, perhaps he was just acknowledging Will’s response or perhaps he was saying ‘of course’. 

A few kisses, a short conversation, and a couple of “I love you”’s later, they got out of bed.

Nico's was wearing Will's high school hoodie that was a bit too short on Will anymore like it was a dress on him. The hoodie went down to Nico’s knees, he's got his own black shorts on because Will's just fall off unless he ties them really really tight. He's got black socks pulled up almost to his knees, there’s a little gap between the end of Nico’s shorts and the start of his socks. The hoodie goes down an inch or two past his short pockets, and he goes outside to grab the mail with a pair of unlaced combat boots on his feet. He's got his skull ring on his middle finger of his right hand, and his left hand holds a simple wedding band which glint in the light as he opens the front door. His hair is pulled up into a messy ponytail, some of it is up some of it is down, there's tons of flyaway hairs which frame his face since he hasn’t fixed it sense getting out of bed.

Call it a cliché, but Nico looks like Heaven personified without even trying. 

Sure, everyone looks nice in a suit or a dress, but how many people can roll out of bed without doing their hair wearing a decade old hoodie and look like they belong in a magazine spread?

Will is wearing one of Nico's looser shirts, on Nico it comes down past his hips and a little onto his thighs, on Will is he so much as lifts his arms a centimeter it reveals his hip bones. He doesn’t really mind, he kind of likes it to be entirely honest. Will can remember being just a few inches shorter than he is now and fitting fairly comfortably in Nico’s clothes at the time, they had never worried whose clothes they grabbed back then. Nico had finished his growth spirt and Will had thought he was done only two inches taller, it didn’t matter whose clothes were whose because everything fit well enough.

That wasn't quite the case now, Nico had stayed at his casual 5"5 while Will had shot up and extra six inches to 6"2 and ruined his own chances of sharing clothes. Such as right now he was sure he was wearing his own sweats, because he had specifically had to get a pair last night despite Nico's having been more accessible. Anytime he's actually managed to get a pair of Nico's pants comfortably on in the last few years, result in him wearing pants that are more like compression shorts or capris than pants.

Will was just happy he could wear some of Nico's larger shirts and hoodies still, the fact that Nico preferred to sleep in lots of clothes and typically baggy clothes meant Will had some options when it came to wearing his husbands stuff.

Will has also managed to steal a pair of Nico's socks, they're a taller pair on Nico (he buys winter wear so often because he's cold always) but on Will they gather a little awkwardly around his ankle. Will doesn't usually wear socks but they had gone to bed without the heat on and apparently the cold had set in over night and you could definitely feel it on their apartment floors.

The clothes would be a bit stretched out from him, it was something Will can remember being worried about after his second growth spurt, but Nico doesn't mind, He's assured Will of this time and time again, he says something about "aesthetic" and "alternative". Will doesn't really know, he's never cared much for fashion but he'll take Nico's word on it. 

The truth, although it's something Nico would only admit in their bed late at night when it was so dark you could barely see his face, and arguably a little drunk as well, was that he actually enjoyed the way the clothes fit better after Will wore them. He found some sort of comfort in the way the shoulders of his shirts would be just a little too wide on him, it was one of those small acts of love, it wasn't one Will entirely understood but both of them got their own sort of enjoyment out of Will stretching out Nico's sleeping clothes some so they went with it.

Will turns his attention from Nico walking out the door to the coffee pot on the countertop.

Will doesn't like coffee much, he likes the social aspect of getting a cup more. Nico had introduced him to it, he’d been drinking it for years by the time they’d left camp. It reminded him of home and he grew to like it for such reasons, and although Nico would consume just about anything with enough caffeine in it Will needed creamer to enjoy coffee to any amount. 

They were both honestly probably more tea people, but they never seemed to remember to buy any. Will will try to remember to write it down on the grocery list later, but Nico has walked back into the kitchen, climbed up on the counter next to Will and now he is looking at him; and Nico is always a distraction that's worthy of taking, Will will definitely forget to write down tea for their grocery list and the week will start over with more coffee in the house and no tea.

Nico’s fingers grip the countertop and he swings his legs a little bit back and forth from where he sits on the black granite, his white gold rings set against the counter in contrast. Will's worn out blue hoodie looks grey with age, the little printed letters are cracked and peeling on the back of it, his last name can still be read in white though. 

Will knows the cliché about your lover wearing your name is often unhealthy and overly possessive, but he likes seeing Nico with his name because it feels like a gift. It’s like he’s given Nico a part of himself and Nico accepted it with pride, and Will loves that, he loves him and Nico being little pieces of each other.

Nico is smiling at him, and leans just so, Will turns in acknowledgment of the gesture, and moves so he’s standing to the left of Nico. Nico crosses his legs at the ankle and leans towards Will laying his head against Will where his neck and shoulder meet. Will leans forward and buries his face into Nico’s hair, comfortable and a little sleepy still.

"Coffee?"

"Mhmm."

"Good."

Will isn't the best cook, for fucks sake he's not even someone who could be considered a good cook, but he can handle this. Nico taught him the basics when they were still living at camp, Will failed every time, he ended up going home for a short period for Christmas break and begging his mom "teach me how to make eggs" he left off the bit about impressing Nico but he knows she knew. When he came back Nico had just smiled at him, "you practiced huh?"

Will hadn't gotten better at making much else, some eggs, toast, coffee and he could boil water now too! He had burnt lots of stuff over the years, plastic containers in the microwave, a plastic ladle they had on the stove top, at least 100 failed attempts at grilled cheese. Will was honestly just happy he hadn’t blown up any microwaves since he was a kid... 

Nico had come home to many of Will's failed attempts at making him various things, sometimes the food was underdone other times it was bits of inedible char. Will did try, he really did, but the heat was always too high or he would end up distracted, or he would use sugar on accident instead of salt. Will did actually try, but his best attempts still often left something to be desired, so he often was the one doing dishes.

Most notably one time Nico had come home to him attempting to pan-frying some fish.

It had been supposed to be a surprise, it was Nico's birthday, and Will had had the day off of class even though Nico hadn't. He figured he would have surprised him; it had been back in their first apartment, not quite as nice as this one. A cheap tiled cream counter top that Nico had literally cringed at when seeing it the first time, the cabinets had somehow been cheaper than a set from IKEA and it had become an inside joke to them.

He had walked in the apartment to see smoke coming off the pan with a bit of flame still coming off it, and a large piece of charred fish stuck to the bottom of one of their frying pans.

"Hey dumbass, what did you do in here?" 

People thought they were an odd couple, Will could see that. The whole parallel people drew between light and dark and optimism and pessimism and such between them, none of those people were really correct though. Will and Nico were more similar than they were different. At the end of the day it didn’t really matter what people said, Will liked Nico, he loved him in all honesty- he'd never heard the word "dumbass" said with so much affection.

Nico was hard for most people to read, years along had left him struggling emotionally in some manner; he did his best to hide most of his emotions, cloak them so heavily that sometimes they were even unrecognizable to Nico himself. 

The most obvious example of this in regards to Nico was how "shut up" often meant "I love you", "idiot" was synonymous with "darling" in some ways. Don't get Will wrong, Nico could be very affectionate, but pet names came with hesitation for him in the early days; Should he use Venetian, Italian, or English? Masculine words that were romantic had been hard for him to say as well... But everyday he grew and got better, and Will was proud of him every time he called Will “dear” and didn’t hesitate before or after. 

Nico had started masking his emotions at some point during his time at Westover, whatever he had done there hadn’t been much more than how much the average person masked their feelings, but when he started training with Minos Nico had doubled down on keeping his emotions secretive. Minos hadn’t been kind or safe in any sense of the word, emotions were what he used to manipulate Nico all that time, it was no wonder Nico developed such a strong sense of apathy towards anything overtime. 

Nico could be affectionate, he could be the most loving person to ever exist. Nico’s emotions were sort of like secrets, if you stayed awake late enough into the night you would only come to know him then, such was the nature of him. He often whispered so quietly his wants and needs into the dark, there was some sense of fear tied to Nico’s vulnerability and he handed off his worries each night to the stars soft glow. Nico often refused to talk openly during the day, but at night apologies and truth always came, he had known what he had wanted earlier he had simply been to afraid of the rejection to acknowledge it, Will is glad that with the years the worst of such things is over; it is unlikely to be something Nico will ever fully grow out of, such is the nature of humanity, but progress is a virtue.

Such times not only resulted in Nico’s acknowledgement of his wants and faults, but also garnered the most affection from Nico. Nico couldn’t always communicate in an effective manner verbally, which was still a process they were working on, but he did his best. Nico’s act of love was like that of a small bird, he gave you small things that seemed insignificant until you realized he had only ever told you such things. Will fell in love with him for it, it wasn’t just about the way he would describe the wallpaper in his childhood bedroom, it was the fact that nobody knew anything else about Nico’s childhood bedroom. 

Will had never truly understood the concept of “touch starved” until he met Nico, he had known the definition sure, but he had never truly witnessed it. Nico never asked for touch, but it was the way he leaned into it, the way he sought it out; pressing up against Will’s hand like a cat stretching trying to get a little more contact somehow, trying to make the touch last just a bit longer so he could savor it properly. It was literally starving in some manner, starving for contact that wasn’t a goodbye or a hit, just for wordless contact. When he grew comfortable he gave affection fully, there was a joy in holding Nico’s hand, knowing that he felt safe enough not to worry about the effect a few extra seconds of prepping for a fight that holding hands would add.

Nico didn’t show affection in big ways, and that was more than okay with Will; they were laid back in comparison to most, he’d have sought the comfort of placing soap bubbles on each others head in the tub a hundred times over a night on the town. Nico’s affection was something quiet and almost secretive, unknown to anyone it wasn’t directed at; it was the way he would lead Will out of a room to kiss him, or the quiet way he whispered “I love you” into Will’s ear when in public.  

Will supposes in the early days “shut up” became “I love you” in order to avoid being seen as weak in some manner, in order to avoid acknowledging what he really wanted to say and having Will not respond in kind. Will didn't mind, they weren't an overly affectionate pairing- banter was common, almost everything they did was turned into some sort of game, the term "boys will be boys" definitely applied to their relationship of 3am pillow fights, late night discussions about what order the Christmas ornaments had to go up on the tree in, and whenever they wrote thesis papers for living room debates over the best Disney villain.

Will honestly preferred it that way, he preferred having the little moments reserved for solely them. He preferred the aversion to sappy clichés, the way a lover could say your name with exasperation and a smile that meant the whole world. He had seen what some other couples had, quick kisses in lines at cafes, holding hands across the table, and calling each other pet names they’d made up that were somehow ten times worse than the original- and Will didn’t want that. 

It wasn’t that what those couples had wasn’t love, it just wasn’t love in a way Will could understand, it wasn’t love Will felt from those sort of exchanges. He didn’t understand the idea of “butterflies in your stomach”, love wasn’t nerves, love was like coming home after a long day, love was the way someone could say your name like it was divine, love was the way someone would smirk at you when you were missing the point, love was not being afraid to cry in front of them,  it was knowing you could show up to them with any problem and instead of leaving you they would research the ins and outs of it in all their entirety. 

The coffee maker makes a sound, Nico lifts his head of off Will’s body and the deep browns of his eyes are like the freshly turned dirt of fields in planting season, and Will feels like there’s a garden growing in his chest that Nico feeds. Nico sits straight on the counter and pulls his legs up and sits cross legged on the counter as he pulls out his hairband, and runs his fingers through his hair before pulling it back up without all the flyaways. 

Will moves towards the coffee machine, pours it into two cups, and sets one on the counter beside Nico before making his way to the fridge to grab creamer. Nico’s watching him right now, but there’s no need for talking; there will be talking in a minute. Talking about Will’s schedule for the week, talk of whatever project Nico is working on right now, talk of what they should do for dinner the rest of the week, little sweet nothings, and eventually they’ll make their way to the couch to watch some tv and maybe later in the day they’ll play some sort of game or something as well.

So yeah, maybe "light" and "dark" were polar opposites and some people would have walked out on the word dumbass rather than immediately loving it, but Will liked it- everyday was a game of sorts, a new adventure, all with Nico who he loved. Coming home from work wasn’t necessarily about the place Will lived but knowing Nico would be there for him to see was the point  of going home, home was wherever Nico was and some small part of Will hoped eternity was real in some manner.

Will remembered when Michael had died thinking nothing could possibly get worse, and in some ways he was kind of right; he had ended up with some sort of demigod style fairy tale ending with the man he loved, and that was ten times better than anything fifteen year old Will would have hoped for.

[lifeisntafantasy]

Gone and Ruined

TW: Major character death directly at the beginning, blood mention, major injury, knife mention, poison.

Percy Jackson couldn't bite down his shout of pain as he felt the blade pierce his stomach.

No.

Percy's hands drifted towards his middle, gasping in pain as he dropped to his knees. This wouldn't end well. Not with the blade being poisoned, not with where the small but long dagger was positioned. No, this wasn't good at all.

He was foolish for not wearing armor, but he barely had time to even arrive to the scene on time, where he saw the two kids, fighting to get to Camp Half-Blood right up the hill. And he needed to save the young demigods from the creatures attacking them.

But, just as he went to slice through the last monster, it had slid a blade into his abdomen. He had killed the beast, but it was still too late. The damage had been done.

The young demigods started running up the hill, yelling for anyone at camp to hear, to help, as Percy struggled to rise, his breath coming in rasping bursts. The poison on the blade was already taking effect, causing more pain and fatigue.

A minute passed, feeling like an hour, and Percy saw familiar blond curls rushing down the hill towards him.

"Percy!" Annabeth Chase screamed.

"Annabeth..." Percy rasped as his girlfriend rushed to his side, helping him up fully. She leaned him on her for support, which was good since his vision was rapidly blurring, whether from major bleeding or the poison, likely both, he had no clue. Annabeth started all but dragging him up the hill. The infirmary seemed light years away. "Annabeth... poisoned blade..." Percy slurred, head dropping forward as he struggled to keep consciousness.

Annabeth swore under her breath, panic rising as she saw the state of her boyfriend. How long had it been since he'd gotten hurt? It couldn't be too long, she came rushing down as she saw the two younger demigods running into camp, screaming that someone had been stabbed. How much poison had been on the blade? How far in was the weapon? Did it puncture anything? He was sweating, his tan skin paling quickly. He needed to get help, and fast.

Annabeth looked towards the gathering crowd. "Someone go get Will Solace!" She shouted. No one moved, everyone seemed stunned that the great Percy Jackson was so badly hurt. "GO!" Annabeth screamed, panic building with every second that passed.

"Come on, Seaweed Brain. You have to stay awake and walk. I can't carry you all the way. Please walk."

Percy took another shuddering breath, trying to hold on for Annabeth. But he knew it'd be too late by the time Will arrived. The infirmary was too far.

"Annabeth-" Percy started.

"No," Annabeth commanded, hearing the tone in his rasping voice. Hearing the acceptance of what was likely to come. Something she herself couldn't accept. "Percy, no. Will is going get here, and you'll be alright. He'll patch you up, and I'll yell at you later, but you'll make it. You're going to make it." Annabeth's vision became fuzzy with tears.

How could her world begin to fall apart so fast? They had been at camp for a fun day to see their friends. This couldn't be happening. Percy had to make it.

"Wise Girl... I'm not going to make it... I love you, and I hate that this is how it ended, but it's happening," Percy took a deep breath, trying to stay awake enough to finish. "Annabeth, you're the strongest girl I know... You'll be okay... But I'm not gonna make it... you know that..."

Annabeth felt the tears fall as Percy's breath became more shallow and his knees buckled, unable to hold any weight anymore. They were only half way up the hill, but Annabeth set Percy down and kneeled next to him. Where in Hades was Will? He needed to get here.

"Percy, please," She begged, a hand drifting to Percy's face, moving his hair away from where it stuck to his forehead. "Please, no, you're gonna be okay, Perce. Come on, please! Hold on, Will should be here soon!" Annabeth spared a glance away from Percy to see if Will was on his way.

Percy lifted his hand to Annabeth's cheek, his own tears falling rapidly, as Annabeth turned to look at him again, her eyes wide and pleading. "Come on... we both know it's too late..." Percy trailed, struggling to breathe. It felt like it had been hours, days since he could breathe right. "I love you... I love you, Wise Girl... I'm sorry we didn't have more time... I'm sorry... I love you more than anything... I'll be waiting for you when your time comes... I love you..."

Annabeth rested her other  hand on Percy's and kissed him quickly. "No, please, Percy. I love you. I love you so much. Please-" Annabeth was cut off by a sob.

Percy weakly wiped a tear from his girlfriend's beautiful face, sad that he brought this look of despair upon her.

Time seemed to stop as his breath slowed, quickly coming to a stop. His hand went limp against Annabeths's, his eyes gazing above unseeing.

Annabeth felt for Percy's pulse. Nothing.

No. No, this isn't true. Percy couldn't be so stupid to die. Not after everything they went through. Not after he said he'd never be apart from her again. No, he wasn't dead. He couldn't be. Her world couldn't be over within minutes like that.

Annabeth's sobs built, and she rested her head on the still chest of Percy. 

Will finally arrived, seconds later, with Chiron. Both stopped dead in their tracks as they saw what lie before them. By then, half the camp had gathered on the hill.

The rest of the world seemed to stop, as if everything, bugs and birds and spirits and maybe even the gods themselves, mourned the loss of a wonderful young man.

Annabeth didn't know how long she sat there crying. Her boyfriend was gone. She'd never see him again. She'd never see his wonderful smile. She'd never again listen to his stupid jokes that she loved so much. She would never again spar with him, always beating him because he never really wanted to win. He'd always let her win. She'd never be able to pass college with him or have a future with him. They'd never have careless days with their friends again. How would she even tell their friends in New Rome what had happened? Oh gods, what about his mom? How was Sally going to react to the news of her son dying?

By the time Chiron pulled Annabeth away from Percy's body, most of the camp had retreated, the only people left were Nico DiAngelo, Will, and Chiron, all of them staring in shock and grief.

But Annabeth didn't pay them any attention, her eyes never leaving her boyfriend's corpse.

Why would the gods allow this to happen?

She thought back to the years leading up to the Titan war, when everyone thought Percy had died. They had thrown him a funeral. But he had come back. He had come back healthy, and she was so happy he returned. And the survived the Titan war, and the Giant war. They had survived together. But now he was gone.

She pulled away from Chiron, her mentor's eyes tracked her with great sadness, but she just numbly walked towards Percy again, lifting his body up and carrying him up the hill and into camp.

————

The next few weeks passed in a haze.

Annabeth barely remembered going to Sally's apartment later that day. She barely remembered sitting on the sofa, breaking down and telling the terrible news to her boyfriend's mom and stepdad. She barely remembered Sally breaking down, and hugging Annabeth, knowing how badly it must've hurt her, too.

She barely remembered spending a whole day with Grover in the Poseidon cabin in almost complete silence, other than their sniffling from their tears and their quiet movements.

Annabeth barely remembered when their friends from New Rome arrived, all puffy eyed and crying, hugging her for their comfort as much as hers.

She barely ate, slept, or took any care of herself, only remembering when her friends made her.

She remembered the day of Percy's funeral though. She remembered having to get up in front of all of camp, the Romans, and Sally, to give her speech. She didn't even get half way through before she broke down, Piper pulling Annabeth away for a break.

She remembered after all the honorary services held for Percy, she went to the lake. She sat, and just thought, remembering everything she and Percy had been through.

Annabeth's life was utterly ruined. Her wonderful, kind, perfect boyfriend who had always been there for her was gone. Her perfect match, the only person who knew her as well, if not better, than she knew herself, was gone. And he was never coming back.

She didn't know how she could ever deal with it.

[buoyantsaturn]

So Come On, Talk it Out (your voice brought me back from the dead) (1/1)

summary: A relaxing date between Nico and Will the spring before Tower of Nero.

word count: 2616

read on ao3

The air was finally warming up late that spring. The snow had all melted a few weeks back, but it had still been too cold to stay outside for more than an hour or two. It definitely hadn’t been warm enough for a pseudo-picnic under the shade of a tree, but now it finally was. And it would probably be their only chance to do so before summer rolled in and brought a hundred kids back to camp. 

Nico had kicked off his shoes and socks before laying his head down in Will’s lap as the son of Apollo sat upright against the trunk of the tree. Nico planted his feet firmly in the grass, and Will cringed at the sight. 

“You’re just going to stick your feet in the grass like that?” he asked.

Nico shrugged as best he could in his current position. “Yeah, so what? It makes me feel more...grounded, more connected to everything.” 

Will snorted. “Yeah, connected to feeling like you’ve got bugs crawling over your feet.” 

“That doesn’t even make sense.” 

Will poked him in the forehead. “You don’t make sense.” Nico snatched Will’s hand away and brought it toward his mouth, biting down gently on the side of Will’s hand before Will could rip it away. “Hey! I thought we agreed on a nice, relaxing date! Relaxing does not include biting.”

Nico reached up and squished the tip of Will’s nose down with a single finger. “No, you agreed on a relaxing date. I already took you on one last week.” 

Will scoffed, and swatted at Nico’s hand. “Almost dropping me in a vat of Cheez Whiz in Venezuela is not relaxing! And I ran out of KitKats, so you couldn’t even get your energy up enough to bring us back here!” 

A smile started to creep its way onto Nico’s face, and he started to brush his fingers across Will’s cheek. “I still can’t believe you committed a crime for me.” 

“Well, what was I supposed to do?” Will demanded, waving his arms frantically. “They wouldn’t accept my drachmas and didn’t speak English, and you--! You couldn’t even open your eyes long enough to see where we were! What was I supposed to do, not steal a few KitKats?”

Nico’s smile was full blown as he gazed up at Will with hearts in his eyes. “So you agree: best date ever, and I win.” 

Will started to laugh - a little bit in shock that Nico would even think that, but also finding it hard not to crack up at the absurdity of their conversation. What other fifteen year old had ever stolen KitKats from some shop in Venezuela to restore his significant other’s magic powers so that they could teleport back home? He almost sounded crazy!

“No,” Will told him, still laughing. “Not the best date ever! And definitely not relaxing! I wanted to, like, sit together like this, and maybe share some snacks and play twenty questions. Not run from cops in Venezuela.”

Nico’s nose scrunched up - something Will had recently learned his did when he was confused - and Will wanted to kiss the wrinkles away. “Why would we play twenty questions?”

“To get to know each other. Duh.” 

Nico tipped his head back and met Will’s eyes, frowning slightly. “Do we...not already know each other?” 

“Well, we do,” Will replied, his head tipping to the side, “but not everything. I don’t even know your middle name.” 

“Yeah, so? I don’t know yours either.” 

Will grinned. “And that’s why we play! Tell me your middle name.” 

Nico rolled his eyes, but answered, “Vincenzo.” 

Will hummed. “Nico Vincenzo di Angelo… I know you’re Italian, Death Boy, but that’s a lot of o’s.”

Nico pursed his lips and turned his head away, gazing out toward the lake. After a moment, he said, “Actually it’s… Niccolo Vincenzo di Angelo.” 

“Your name is Niccolo? That’s so cute!” Will repeated the name to himself a few times in his head, and then gasped. “Like piccolo! Oh my gods, Nico, can I call you piccolo?” 

Nico leveled him with a glare so strong that it could’ve made flowers wilt on the spot, but Will didn’t so much as flinch. “Absolutely not.” 

Will lifted a hand and started to brush his fingers through Nico’s hair. He leaned into the touch, despite how angry he was pretending to be. “Okay, so only in private, then.” 

“No! Never!” 

Will simply continued to smile down at him, carding his fingers through Nico’s hair and gently releasing tangles in the curls. He wondered if Nico’s hair would curl up even more if it was shorter, but they’d both gotten fond of the length. “It’s your turn to ask,” Will reminded him softly after a few short moments of silence. 

Nico crossed his arms with a huff, and looked away again - though only with his eyes this time, as though not to dislodge Will’s hand from his head. “Same question.” 

Will hesitated. “Can you call me piccolo?”

At least Will’s brief moment of stupidity brought a smile back to Nico’s face. “No, your middle name.” 

“Oh! It’s Andrew. William Andrew Solace.” 

Nico repeated the name, whispering it to himself, and Will felt his heart skip a beat at the sound. Then, Nico’s hand searched out Will’s - the one that wasn’t twirling curls around his fingers - and laced their fingers together. He met Will’s eyes as he said, “William Andrew Solace, I want you to know that if you ever betray me, I will use your full name to embarrass you as payback.” 

Will’s smile only brightened. “Why would I ever betray you?” 

Nico shrugged again. “You might not even realize it when it happens. I’m not talking about any big stakes. I mean, like… Like if Sherman’s on the lava course, and you don’t tell me so I can avenge my loss against him. That’s a betrayal.” 

“You really are kind of a sore loser, huh.” 

“I am not!”

Will nodded. “Uh huh. Okay, Piccolo.” 

Nico ripped his hand out of Will’s and used it to smack at his arm. “Shut up!”

With his hand now free, Will was able to reach into the backpack he’d brought with him, and pulled out a clementine. He took away his other hand, causing Nico to sigh in disappointment, though Will didn’t tease him for it. If the sudden blush on his face was anything to go by, then Nico hadn’t intended to make a sound at all. Will laid one arm across Nico’s chest, the other held over Nico’s head as he reached around him to peel the clementine. 

“Where was the first place you shadow traveled to?” Will asked. 

Nico paused to think, one of his hands coming up almost subconsciously to curl his fingers around Will’s arm. “Uh, China, I think? I don’t really remember. I kinda...jumped, and then immediately passed out. I think Minos said I was out for, like, three days, and then I just jumped back.” 

“You went all the way to China? And you didn’t bring any KitKats?” 

Nico pinched his arm. “We just learned about the KitKat thing a month ago, Will. Whatever. Um, did you have any pets before you came to camp?” 

Will grinned at the change of subject. “I did! I had a golden retriever, and her name was Sandy.” He dropped the clementine peel into the grass and broke the fruit into pieces. He took one small piece and held it out for Nico.

“No thanks,” Nico told him.

“You haven’t eaten since yesterday,” Will reminded him.

“I went without eating for a week when I was in that jar.” 

“Yeah, and I wish you would stop reminding me of that, because it just makes me want to feed you even more. So, open up!” 

Nico rolled his eyes, but allowed his mouth to drop open so that Will could feed him the slice of clementine. Nico’s face scrunched up as he chewed. “It’s kinda sour.” 

Will ate his own slice, and shrugged. “Not really. You just haven’t eaten a fruit in over a year and forgot what it’s supposed to taste like.”

“Uh, pomegranates are fruit, and I--”

“Ate those in the jar, I know,” Will cut in, “but you were in a trance and probably didn’t even taste them, so that doesn’t count.” 

Nico huffed. “Whatever.” Still, he opened his mouth when Will placed another slice of clementine at his lips. 

“Have you ever thought about getting a tattoo?” Will asked.

Nico shook his head, gently rolling it back and forth over Will’s thigh. “Nah, I’ve been stabbed with a knife before and that wasn’t great, so I don’t think I need to get stabbed with a thousand tiny needles. Why, have you?” 

Will frowned. “Okay, we’re going to circle back to that later, but yes, I have.”

“What were you thinking of getting?” 

Will moved the few remaining clementine pieces into one hand, and placed the other on Nico’s chest. He drew a circle with his finger directly over Nico’s heart and said, “Right here, I want to get a sun.” 

“Why’s that? Are you afraid people won’t think you’re sunshiney enough because of the...everything about you?” 

Will flicked him in the chest, right in the center of the circle he’d drawn. He smiled as he lifted his gaze out toward the lake - he was worried about something, Nico could tell that much just by looking at him.

“I’ve been thinking about my dad a lot recently,” Will started, his voice hushed as though he was sharing a secret. “I haven’t heard from him in so long and I’m...worried about what’s going to happen if he doesn’t make it. I’m worried about the state of the world, first and foremost, don’t get me wrong, but… What about me? Do I lose everything? Will I still be able to heal? Or use any of my other powers?” 

He dropped his gaze again, eyes focused on the spot on Nico’s chest where his fingers had started to circle again. “So I want that tattoo as, like, a way to remember him, and a way to remember that part of myself, just in case things don’t go as planned.” 

Nico covered Will’s hand with his own, and brought it up to his lips so that he could press a kiss to his knuckles. “Whatever happens, you’ll always be my sunshine.” 

Will smiled at him sweetly and said, “Who are you, and what have you done with my significant annoyance?”

Nico huffed and threw Will’s hand away. “Way to ruin the moment.” 

“Just ask me another question, would you?” Will asked, and popped another piece of clementine into his mouth. There was just one left - he’d give it to Nico.

“It’s not my turn,” Nico told him.

“Oh, yeah.” Will fed him the clementine and tipped his head back against the tree as he thought. “What’s your favorite movie?” 

“I dunno, I don’t watch a lot of movies,” Nico replied. “I don’t really have the attention span for that, so I haven’t seen...any?” 

Will’s jaw dropped. “You haven’t seen Star Wars?”

Nico hesitated. “Uh, no? I think Percy said I didn’t need to see it anyway, because there’s apparently some other Star-something movies that are better.” 

“Star Trek?” Will shrieked. “Absolutely not! The Apollo cabin is a Star Wars family, and I will not stand for this kind of slander. For our next date, we’re watching the original trilogy.” 

“Woah, hang on a second!” Nico held up his thumb between them. “First of all, I get to pick our next date.” He raised his index finger. “Second, I just said I can’t even sit through one movie, and you want me to watch three? I don’t think so.” He added his middle finger. “And third-- Uh, no actually, I don’t think I have a third point.” 

“Okay, then two dates from now, we’ll watch Episode Four, and then another two dates later, we’ll watch Episode Five--”

“Why wouldn’t we start with the first episode?” Nico asked. “Wait, and I thought these were movies. Actually, no, never mind. Whatever, as long as it makes you happy.” 

Will smiled. “It will.” 

“So, I assume that’s your favorite movie.” 

Will hummed an affirmative. He started to stroke Nico’s hair once again, and Nico’s eyes slipped shut at the feeling. “You gotta ask me another question,” Will whispered. 

Nico cracked one eye open. “I just did.” 

“That wasn’t a question, it was an assumption. And besides, I can’t think of another one, so you go.” 

Nico rolled his eyes. “Oh, like I can? This game was your idea, Solace.” He let his eyes fall shut again, though there was a tiny wrinkle between his brows that let Will know he was trying to think. “What other powers do you have?”

Will tapped his fingers against Nico’s skull a few times, and then resumed playing with his hair. “Well, you know about the healing, and my sonic whistle. And, uh, I don’t know if this is a power, really, but I’m good at calming people down. And I can, um.” He cleared his throat, and Nico opened his eyes to see that Will was looking everywhere and anywhere that wasn’t at Nico. “Glow. So what other powers do you have?” 

Nico sat up instantly. “Hang on, did you just say you can glow?” He turned to face Will, clutching his hands in his own and demanding, “Show me!” 

Will’s cheeks were turning pink, and he still wouldn’t meet Nico’s eyes. “It’s-- I can’t, it’s too bright out here, so you wouldn’t be able to see it anyway, and… I dunno, it’s embarrassing.” 

“No way, it’s not embarrassing, it’s cool. Just show me!” 

Will sighed, and his eyes flickered up to meet Nico’s for just a second before he looked away again. “Fine, but only for a second. Can you try to make it a bit darker? It’ll show up better that way.” 

Nico released Will’s hands and dropped his own to the ground. The shadow of the tree they sat under stretched and darkened, and the air around them grew cold enough that Nico wished he had a jacket. Will started to take off his flannel shirt, and Nico was half-tempted to reach out for it and put it on himself when he saw Will hold out his arms and close his eyes. A moment later, his skin turned from bronze to gold, each of his freckles acting as little flashlights to let the light escape from beneath Will’s skin.

Nico grinned. “That’s so cool!” 

Will let the glow fade, and he pulled his flannel back on as Nico released his hold on the shadow. “It’s really nothing special,” Will muttered.

“Yes it is!” Nico insisted, waving his arms around for emphasis. “I have my own personal glow-in-the-dark boyfriend!” 

Will’s head snapped up, his eyes locking on Nico’s as his jaw dropped open again. “Did you… Did you just say boyfriend?”

Nico’s cheeks had developed a bit of their own blush, but he refused to look away. “I… Yeah, I did. Is that okay?” 

Will beamed, reaching out for one of Nico’s hands to lace their fingers together. “That’s so okay. That’s more than okay! Does that mean I can start calling you my boyfriend now, too?”

Nico let a smile creep onto his lips. “Nah, you’re my boyfriend, but I’m still your significant annoyance.” 

Will rolled his eyes, but nothing would be able to take that smile off his face. He tugged on Nico’s hand to pull him close and press a kiss to his cheek. “You got that right.” 

thanks for reading!!

buy me a coffee | come talk to me if you need a distraction!

[lifeofroos]

Part 48. I like Ariadne. 

In short: Nico gets therapy from Dionysus. In this chapter, Nico takes a minute to talk to Dionysus’ wife, Ariadne. The rest of the story can be found on AO3, FanFiction.net and in Tumblr tags like Dionysus, Nico di Angelo, Fanfic etc. 

This Might Be Crazy: Chapter 48: Rosemary Tea

I lit a small incense stick. The smell of pinewood filled my cabin. Just when I wanted to begin praying to get Ariadne’s attention, I already got it. One moment, I was in my cabin, the next I was on Olympus, looking out over a massive vineyard. 

‘Nico di Angelo.’

I turned around. ‘The lady of the house, I assume.’ 

‘Yes. You called on me?’

Barely. ‘Yes. I, well…’ I shrugged. I wasn’t entirely sure. I didn’t think I’d get this far. 

Ariadne put her chin up. ‘I can’t say I wasn’t expecting you one of these days. Why don’t we talk?’

I mean, that is what I had in mind. I nodded and she gestured that I could come into the palace. 

Dionysus’ palace was big. It took a good twenty minutes to walk to a sitting room on the other side. In the meantime, Ariadne chatted about the decor for a bit. It was clear she had been responsible for most of it (it was way too stylish to be done by Dionysus). 

We sat down in two comfy chairs, with a coffee table in between. Ariadne snapped her fingers. A pot of tea appeared. ‘Sorry for the long walk. The west flank of the palace is not under control by the headmaster, so I had to bring you there.’ 

Zeus. ‘Eh, I get it.’ So. Now that we sit and we’ve got tea, I was kind of curious about how you managed to live with Dionysus for thousands of years.

‘Lets get the obvious question of your mind: You are wondering how I managed to live with Dionysus for thousands of years.’ 

I nodded, a little perplexed, but mostly glad I did not have to open the conversation. 

She poured out two cups of tea and picked up her own. ‘I don’t read minds or anything, it’s just what they always ask. The short version is that he helped me when I was going through a hard time, the same way he is helping you now. The difference is that he somehow fell in love with me.’ She took a sip of her tea. ‘And, after some more time, which he gave me, I felt the same way. Got married, stayed together, end of story.’ She picked up her cup. ‘Yet, you probably already guessed that there was more.’ 

‘Well, Yes. I would say that the support he gives you goes further than with me. He once, kind of accidently, told me about the bond.’

She nodded. ‘Accidently? Oh well. Yet, yes, we have a bond. I’d say it connects us quite well.’

‘Quite, quite well, I’d say. For thousands of years.’ I picked up my own cup. ‘Hephaestus told me Dionysus treated him like a regular human… or god, whatever. Like he was more than a tool or a piece of garbage. That is basically how my therapy works. ’

Ariadne nodded. ‘We share that sentiment, you, me and Hephaestus, among others. We feel like we are worth something. Like someone does care about us. That is how it made me feel.’ She looked at the ceiling for a second. ‘Cared for, and like I was finally free to do and go where I wanted, gods! That means something after constantly being bound to something, either my chambers in the palace, or the island, or the men I was with. I still don’t know how I did confinment for twenty years.’ Her expression soured. ‘I do know why I went with Theseus. It meant... a change of scenary, at least.’ 

I sighed and slouched in the chair a little. ‘Ah, yes, sons of Poseidon.’ 

She raised an eyebrow. ‘Sons?’

I looked up. She didn’t know? ‘I thought Dionysus would have told you. Anyway, I was in love with one of those too, once. He just wasn’t a piece of garbage about it. Did not abandon me somewhere, at least, or bully me for it. He might have been a little confused, but, you know. I get that. He seems confused about most things, actually.’

She shifted. ‘It must have been Percy Jackson.’

I took a sip. ‘Yes. And, eh, sorry.’ Didn’t want to rub it in your face. I wanted to ask what she thought of Percy, but maybe that wasn’t…

‘I do not have anything against Perseus Jackson, if you were wondering about that.’ She raised her eyebrows. ‘I think Dio has more problems with that than I do.’

‘I think you might just be right.’

She sighed. ‘Oh well. Yet, I did hear you were accepted like you are in camp, son of Poseidon as your first crush or not.’

‘I was! Camp overall is pretty accepting, actually, that is nice. They even learned to trust Hades kids. And idiots who fall in love with sons of Poseidon. It took a while, but they accept Annabeth now.’

She chuckled and pushed her hair out of the way. ‘So many more things are getting accepted these days, even amongst the gods. There is a shift in their behaviour. I don’t know what the trigger was, after thousands of years, but I am glad it is this way.’ She twisted a curl around a finger. ‘Sorry, entirely different subject, but how did your talk with the elder gods go?’

‘It was weird, but it went good enough. Over the last few days, I have heard less and less of the voices from Tartarus, and more and more from the voices of where the Elder Gods are.’

She smiled and nodded. ‘Luckily. You know, admitting the elder gods is a central part of becoming immortal. Because of previous lives, something, something, even the lord of the heavens is not really sure, I had to talk to them.’ She sighed. ‘Basically, part of me is also an older god, which meant that I was supposed to fill this role as a goddess right now.’ She rolled her eyes. I snickered. ‘I hardly understand what it means.’

I adjusted my jacket. ‘Still, that must be strange, though, to know that part of you is just…’ I waved my hands around. ‘Somewhere in superheaven.’

‘You get used to it.’

‘Still, it seems weird.’ 

‘To me, it seems weird that you visit the Underworld so often.’ She shuddered. ‘For me, it wasn’t a very good place. After I was killed, I was sent to Elysium. My father, king Minos, kept trying to control me and I missed Dio terribly. I would have chosen rebirth if Dionysus hadn’t taken me out of there.’ 

‘Oh yes, bringing people back to live, the thing he tells me is unhealthy to do.’

She gave me a mellow smile. ‘The difference is that he is immortal and you are not.’ 

Maybe. ‘Not yet. And I met king Minos, too. He was a nasty piece of work, sorry not sorry to say it. He tried to control me into his evil villian plans.’

‘I am not offended. He was a bad king, a bad husband to my mother and a bad father to his children.’

‘And a bad partner to raise the dead with.’

‘I am going to pretend I did not hear that.’

‘Thanks. Although my therapist is already aware of it.’ I took a sip. ‘Then we can both agree that he was a huge dirtwad.’

‘We quite certainly can. I still do not forgive him for marrying off my youngest sister to some old king who died not even a year later. She was then forced out of the palace to make room for the new king and queen, just so Minos could get the bridewealth payments.’

‘Oh yes, that is a very dirtwad thing to do.’ We both sighed.

Her expression grew dark. ‘I used to think my mother was better. She tried to protect her children, even Asterion. Yet, that was before she tried to take my labyrinth and use it against who I am. What she did a few years ago, raising it without my permission…’ she clutched her fist. ‘She had no business doing that and getting me wound up in it again. Before that, the labyrinth was a memory, safely far away from the human world. Now...’ She looked at her teacup. 

I nodded. ‘Eh… my sister was the one who handled Pasiphae in that encounter. I think she is gone, now…’

‘She isn’t, Nico, and she never will. She harnesses too much power to just be gone.’ 

I fell silent for a second. ‘I think I believe that,’ I whispered. 

‘I hope you do, but I also hope you don’t have to deal with her in your lifetime anymore.’

I was fifteen. On average, there was a lot of lifetime left to meet Pasiphae a second time. But I did not want to think of that right now.

‘If there is anything you take away from this, let it be that women in mythology, and not uncommonly men too, often fled, because the situation at home was chocking them.’ She had a flicker in her eyes, which suddenly left. She shook her head. ‘You probably don’t want to think of that right now. Say, have you ever tried this tea before?’

Now she was just trying to change the subject. I played along. ‘I recognise it. Rosemary?’

‘Yes! We grow it in the garden, actually, or better said, my garden. His garden is more or less... taken.’ She smiled again and looked out the window, at the vineyard that spread all around the castle. 

‘Guess that makes sense.’

‘I wouldn’t mind more flowers. But hey, I knew what I was getting myslef in to, back when I moved here.’ We kept looking out the window. I noticed a few panthers lazily roaming about. Ariadne didn’t even blink at seeing them. Just a regular day in Dionysus’ palace, apparently. 

‘I don’t know if I will tell Dionysus about this encounter.’

‘I think he already had a hunch it was going to happen, because I did. Bond and stuff.’ I nodded. ‘If you already told him you were in love with Percy… well, that is an easy link to me, I’d say.’

Maybe. Ariadne studied me, before she stood up. ‘If your finished, maybe you should get back. They might begin to miss you. 

I looked up at the clock and jumped up when I saw it was already past eight. Ariadne telling me the clocks were mad and did what they wanted did not calm me down. 

While we walked back to the mystic Zeus-free west flank, she said: ‘I am glad I could finally meet you. You seem like a nice, smart young man.’

‘Thanks. Eh, also, thanks for the talk and thanks for the tea. It was good tea.’

‘I’ll give you some. I am kind of proud of it, actually. It is one of the only teas that isn’t brewed by Demeter.’ 

A/N: My first draft of this felt clunky, it is better now. Still, I find it strange that it turned out the way it did. That Ariadne of all people is the goddess who keeps her distance for a bit, aside from the things she has in common with Nico.

As I said before: I need more Ariadne fanfiction I am being denied my RIGHTS the first hit when I google it is my own fanfic of two years ago and one chapter in Weezl’s drabble doc. 

Legit, Ariadne is the ‘mistress of the labyrinth.’ Don’t know how RR missed that. Be prepared because this fact WILL come back in a later chapter. 

[amarauder]

Percy is a Boiled Egg (Part One) - Percy Jackson x Reader

004. percy is a boiled egg (part one)

PAIRING; Percy Jackson x Reader

REQUEST; "Are you nervous, love?"/ reader comes along in the son of Neptune quest and they fall in love

GODLY PARENT; Mars (reader is roman, ares in greek)

DATE; May 19th, 2020

WORD COUNT; 6467

WARNING; keep in mind that reader curses using food terms so you're not confused, also, because this is based so much off the book, I already have a disclaimer at the introduction part, but I just feel like it needs another one.

A/N; So, I basically wrote this whole thing in a day? Also, this is only part one because well, I needed to get something out and it's so long already. But I knew this request was going to be long so. It might be two parts, three parts, whatever. Anyway, this is not my best work but I like it. So... Also, I hope I didn't rush Percy's relationship with reader too much, especially considering they actually didn't introduce themselves. But here's the thing, I am probably going to go back and add in the war games part. (it will be in a flashback sort of thing though) I just kind of skipped over it because originally the one shot started after the war games but then I realized that the requester wanted some other things before that. So...

TRAILER; in which reader is forced to tag along on the quest.

REQUESTED BY; becca_unheart

-

 Y/N was more pissed off than worried as she entered Camp Jupiter once again. It had been around two months of merely surviving on a quest, well, actually, two days of trying to complete the quest and the rest was just attempting to survive.

 Her and a group of other idiotic demigods, while sprinkling in a few amazons only led to trouble. Y/N should have known that when she accepted the quest to find Jason Grace, but all she found was that the Gods had miraculously decided to stop talking to them, of course, right after their beloved Praetor left. Oh, and the only way she knew how to kill monsters was now apparently not working, despite it have continued on for millennias. But you know priorities.

"Come on, you pork chops," Y/N said as they crossed the Nile River, "I gotta give Renya the run down of the quest, and she's not gonna be happy. So I suggest you shower and get some sleep while you can."

The campers nodded and went their own way, with a chorus of thanks between them.

The walk to the Principa should have been calming, but Y/N was going to meet Renya at the Principa to tell her they had not found Jason Grace which was almost equivalent to a march of death.

But it seemed marching to her death had been too monotonous because when she got there Renya was already there gliding across the floor like an eagle about to grab it's prey. It made her stumble of her panic, she had expected Renya to be out and about, it would give Y/N some time to think about how she could try and make the situation seem better.

Fortunately, Hazel stood in front of Renya, along with a boy who looked around her age. Their time with Reyna would hopefully give her more time to think. It was odd seeing the two together, and Y/N wondered how the boy and Hazel had become acquaintances considering their age difference. Well, what she guessed was their age difference, they were facing Renya and the only thing she could point out was that he had dark hair and was tall. But boys don't usually grow until their late teens.

It wasn't until that Argentum and Aurum nuzzled against her hands did she turn her attention back to Renya.

Renya had never looked so relieved to see Y/N and it wavered her nerves for a second. But then her eyes flickered past Y/N and she saw no Jason Grace, and Y/N saw the corner of Renya's lips dip down again. "Y/N," Renya boomed, interrupting Hazel and causing both the boy and Hazel to look over at her, "It's about time you came home." Y/N opened her mouth to speak but Renya beat her to it, "We will discuss that matter later, as for now, there are more important things to discuss. Hazel take Percy outside, Y/N will join you both to Temple Hill and explain the legion. Good luck with the augury, Percy Jackson. If Octavian lets you live, perhaps we can compare notes... about your past."

Hazel and the boy, Percy Jackson, walked past her. She gave Hazel a smile, and studied Percy. He was rather cute considering his filthiness, he looked exhausted but managed to get out of Renya's wrath without collapsing. Y/N should have been impressed but all she got was an odd feeling about him, as if he was an omen, a quick warning, but she couldn't tell if it was a good one or a bad one.

The second they exited the Principa, Renya collasped in her chair, "No sign of Jason, then?"

"Nothing," Y/N replied after some hesitation, "It doesn't make sense Renya. No clues, no nothing. None of the amazons have seen him, or Lupa. It's almost as if he disappeared in thin air. But the Gods aren't talking to us, and it either has something to do with the monsters not dying or Jason disappearing... maybe even both."

Renya was quiet after her mini speech, but she didn't look shocked as if she had been expecting all of this but didn't want to admit it. Her silence made Y/N nervous. Holy Mars' chicken wings,  Camp Jupiter just made her anxious in general.

"I, um," Renya started and then cleared her throat. It was when Y/N took a step closer did she realize that her Praetor had been close to tears. Y/N didn't know what to do, in normal circumstances, she would go up and comfort Renya. But Renya wasn't just anyone, she was her Praetor and she didn't know the guidelines for this protocol. Plus, what was she supposed to say? I'm sorry that Jason disappeared right when you guys were going to become a couple, even though it's illegal and I am not supposed to know that but basically the entire camp knows.

Fortunately, Renya calmed down during Y/N's mini panic attack and picked herself up, "Keep an eye on Percy Jackson, Y/N. There is... He is... I think he has something to do with Jason missing."

Y/N raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms. That boy that she just saw has something to do with Jason? What was Renya going on about? "That doesn't make sense."

"He's lost his memory, Y/N."

"And?"

Renya hesitated before breathing out a sigh and gesturing for Y/N to come closer, "I've met him before. Back when I..." she trailed off and gave Y/N a look. Back when she had been working on Circe's Island. "Ya, before I became Praetor, I met him there. He's a Gracceus, Y/N. A son of Poseidon, a son of the big three, just like Jason."

Y/N sat down her heart pounding in her ears as her mind fluttered around thousands and thousands of different possibilities. Was Percy dangerous? Had the Gods sent him here on purpose? What were they trying to pull? Was Jason okay? Where was he? Was there a Greek legion just like them? Were they trying to send them a warning by kidnapping Jason?

"So, you're saying that Percy's Greek and-" Renya startled her by clapping a hand over her mouth, she hadn't even said it that loud!

"You have to be quiet about these things, Y/N. What if Octavian found out? Or worse, Percy."

So, Percy doesn't know he is a Greek demigod, and Renya thinks that is worse than Octavian finding out and killing everyone. Makes sense, obviously.

"Ya, priorities, right?" Y/N scoffed with a roll of her eyes once Renya took her hand off her mouth. "But explain to me what you know, so we are on the same page."

"Percy Jackson is a son of Poseidon and Jason is a son of Jupiter. They are both one of the only known sons of the big three." What about Nico and Hazel, Y/N thought, but just as she was about to open her mouth to ask she closed it. Hades had always been shunned away, maybe his children didn't count? "Percy has no memory but somehow has survived for sixteen years despite the fact that he is a son of Neptune-sorry, Poseidon-and has no markings on his wrist and just recently visited Lupa. What if the Greek demigods never went extinct after the war?"

The idea was so ridiculous that Y/N started to laugh. Her hysterical laughter was more like a panic attack, but Renya just sat her down. "There's no way Renya. No way. The Greeks went extinct after the war, they don't have their own legion. Percy probably just got really lucky and Jason may have gone looking for his sister, ya know? Remember the girl, Thalia, he used to always talk about."

"But Mount Othrys, we wouldn't have been able to take down Kronos' black throne without-"

"No," Y/N snapped at her, realization dawning on her like finding the answer to a previous question on a test after reading a new question. She got up before she would dive head first into Renya's conspiracy theories. "No, there's no way. There can't be."

"Just think about it."

"Why? To stress me out more?"

"No, because what if Jason's there?"

"And if Jason has no memory of us then we are absolutely, positively screwed."

"What? Why?"

"Renya, we do not have the resources right now for a war."

"Who said they would attack us?" Renya snapped back, hurt by her friend disclosing her idea before it had really even started.

"Well, we would. Who's to say they are any different?"

"If Jason was there... I would never, could never," Renya rambled on, her arms wrapping around her stomach. For a few seconds Y/N felt guilty. She knew she would never be able to fight, hell, kill demigods. But she had to nip this bud before it bloomed. False hope never led to anything good.

"I know, but Octavian would." Renya looked up as she said that, and before Renya could mention anything about Y/N running against Octavian for Praetor she left.

-

"Who's Jason?" she heard Percy ask Hazel before they came into view. It was a nice day, the sun warmed her up nicely and she fought against the urge to just drop down on the grassy area and just sun bathe, maybe forget about life for a while. She probably would have if Jason wasn't brought up.

Y/N and Jason had somewhat gotten along. She respected him and he respected her, but Jason had always been way too serious and had seemed to bring out a sobering part of her that Y/N hadn't even realized she had.

Before Jason had decided to be a little sardine and disappear on everyone, life had been great. She had been working up the ranks and finally had been just about to become apart of the Senate when Jason decided that the fifth cohort needed a different centurion. Jason had left the day after she was appointed the second centurion of the fifth cohort, which according to Jason was an honor but Y/N never believed him.

Besides that, Renya had been her best friend before he left. But now, she didn't know where they stood, not after that fight they had about Jason the day before he left. Y/N really didn't want to become centurion of the fifth cohort, they got the worst weapons, the worst bedding and bathing times. It had been more of an insult than a honor. But Renya had just mindlessly agreed with anything he said, like a lost puppy. It was ridiculous and Renya should have known that, but then he had to go and disappear, and now, Y/N regretted that fight more than ever.

Her and Jason Grace weren't on the best terms at the moment but that didn't stop her from snapping at the boy who was causing even more problems. Why was it always boys?

"No one," Y/N spat and started walking towards Temple Hill without checking to see if they were following.

Instead of cowering away like most of the campers did, all Percy said was, "You remind me of someone."

"Well, if they are anything like me then they must hate you a lot," Y/N growled and threw her hair up in a ponytail. It was knotted and greasy from lack of hygiene, but lack of hygiene had never been one of her top priorities on her quest, on any quest for that matter.  

"You remember someone?" Hazel asked, "Who?" Y/N had almost forgotten he had lost his memory. Losing memories isn't common in a demigod life, but concussions were.

"My Mom," Percy said wistfully, then turned to Y/N, "She's not who you remind me of though. I don't know who that is."

Y/N nodded and rolled her eyes, then why did he even mention his Mom, "Have you always had memories of your Mother?"

"Ya, her names Sally and I remember some brief memories of when I was young but that's about it."

"Have you had him checked for a concussion yet, Hazel?" Y/N asked.

"No-"

"Why does it even matter," Percy moped, "I'm going to die thanks to Octavian anyway."

Y/N laughed, "Don't worry about him. Everyone is just stressed, no one is going to die."

"Ya," Hazel added with a teasing smile, "Besides Octavian has a soft spot for Y/N. I think that's why Renya sent her with us."  

-

Y/N had just finished roll call when she saw Hazel skid into line. Fortunately, Dakota hadn't reached the end of his list of names and Hazel had made it just in time to squeak out, "Present!" The younger girl had nectar dripping off her fingertips and she had half a mind to go ask her if everything was okay before Octavian started.

"Colors!" he shouted and the standard-bearers stepped forward. Each drenched in lion-skin and poles with each cohort's emblem. When her cohort presented their own pole, Y/N flinched from embarassment. The stupid eagle was still missing, and Y/N would be damned if entire career at the fifth cohort went by without finding it.

Despite everyone snickering about the eagleless pole, Renya carried on, "Romans!" she called. "You've probably heard about the incursion today. Two gorgons were swept into the river by this newcomer, Percy Jackson. Juno herself guided him here, and proclaimed him as a son of Neptune."

Glancing up at Percy, she found herself shocked at his modesty. He had been led to Camp by a goddess, and not just any goddess, the queen of gods herself. Then, he managed to slash two gorgons, and merely raised his hand and said, "Hi."

Something fishy was going on. She couldn't name one guy who wouldn't flaunt this feat, even Jason had been one to brag about taking down Kronos' throne during dinners.

"He seeks to join the legion," Renya continued. "What do the auguries say?"

"I have read the entrails," Octavian announced, his eyes were locked on her form and Y/N almost stumbled back in surprise. She hadn't been expecting him to be looking straight at her when he said that. Before Y/N could turn to Dakota and see if he had noticed anything odd about that encounter too, even though it probably wouldn't have done any good, Octavian remarked, "The auguries are favorable. He is qualified to serve."

The campers all shouted, "Ave!" One kid in the third court screamed it so loud that Y/N stopped glaring holes into Octavian's head to look at him. Him and his friends had only snickered.

Renya gestured for the centurions to come forward and with a sigh, Y/N took a few steps forward with a roll of her eyes. How was she supposed to take this seriously when she was stuck in the fifth cohort?

It wasn't until Renya had glared at her did Y/N start to pay attention to what was going on.

Percy shifted. "Letters? Um, no."

Octavian smirked and wrinkled his nose. She noticed him glancing at her again and she scoffed, loudly. Octavian did a double take and it seemed that this had gotten the rest of the camper's attentions too because everyone was staring at her.

"Do you have anything to say for the fifth cohort, Y/N?" Octavian asked, his smile widening when everyone started to laugh.

Y/N glanced at Renya. She sighed and then looked at Percy, then sighed again, "I don't mean to interupt, Senior Centurion," Y/N mocked, Octavian's own eyes narrowing. If there was one thing in the world that Octavian wanted, it was to be Praetor. He wasn't yet and Y/N prayed to every God and Goddess there ever was that he would never become one. "But Juno did purposely lead Percy here, and if the Queen of Gods decides to take the time out of her day to bring Percy to us... Then, I mean, what better recommendation could you really want?"

Octavian fumed when murmured agreements were heard throughout the cohorts. Y/N looked at Percy, who was looking back at her with a type of sincerity that made felt her stomach flutter. Her hand subconsciously made it's way to brush back some of her hair that was still wet from the baths, and she noticed her cheek felt warm from under her fingertips. She was just thankful that she couldn't blush. (or, if you can then, She was just hoping that everyone took her embarrassment from all the attention she had received in such a short amount of time.)

"No letters," Octavian said regretfully and Y/N's mouth dropped open, appalled, "Will any legionnaires stand for him?"

"I will!" She heard Frank from behind her, "He saved my life!"

Almost immediately, there were shouts of protest from every cohort. Renya raised her hand for silence and glared daggers at Frank, "Frank Zhang, for the second time today, I remind you that you are on probatio. Your godly parent has not claimed you yet. You're not elgible to stand for another camper until you've earned your first stripe."

But before anyone could open their mouth to stand for Percy, Hazel took over, "What Frank means is that Percy saved both our lives. I am a member of the legion. I will stand for Percy Jackson."

However, other campers started to whisper between themselves again. Hazel was barely eligible. She had only gotten her first stripe a week or two ago, and her 'act of valor' had been more of an accident than anything.

It seemed Renya realized that too because she looked at Y/N for help, and once again Y/N sighed. "I will stand for Perseus Jackson." Y/N said, quietening everyone down to silence. Twice that day Y/N had stood up for Percy, it was enough to make rumors circle around. "I am not only a full member of the legion, but also a centurion. Perseus Jackson will be in good hands, if you do not accept Hazel's then accept mine."

Over the chaos that had ensued after he speech, she thought she heard Percy say, "It's Percy, not Perseus." But Y/N couldn't bring herself to care, especially when they had decided Y/N would be most eligible to stand for him.

-

Her chest burned as she stared at the idiot in front of her. Dakota and Renya glanced at each other uneasily out of the corner of her eye but she paid them no attention, Mike Kahale was the only thing on her mind. He was rolling his eyes as if no one's lives mattered except for the legions.

"Come on, L/N," he said after no one dared to say anything, "Why don't you calm down? Have some of Dakota's pathetic kool-aid."

"Hey," Dakota remarked looking appalled, "Leave the kool-aid out of this!"

"It's bologna! Octavian obviously killed her!"

"I could do for a bologna cheese sandwich right now," Someone that sounded suspiciously like Percy said behind her.

"Ya," Dakota remarked, "Y/N, your curse words always make me hungry."

Mike took another step towards her as if to try and intimidate Y/N. Her hand trembled beside her as she fought against the urge to punch him in the face. , "Don't make assumptions, L/N. You have no clue what you are talking about."

"Well, it's remarkable that the plium belongs to the first cohort, and Octavian had managed to lose his right before this happened," Y/N hissed as she turned to look at the man himself, "Did you drop it on the floor, or no let me guess. Did one of your stuffed bears hit Gwen with the plium?"

Octavian only stared at her silently, which only fueled her anger. How could he just stand there after he killed another camper? Shaking her head, she turned to Renya who looked to be on the verge of tears.

The sick feeling in her stomach worsened, and she felt as if she was about to throw up and scream at the same time.

She felt Mike brush against her as she walked over to Renya and whispered, "We all know you are upset just because I took your place in the senate and your place as centurion in the first cohort. How does it feel to step down to the fifth cohort, Y/N? I'm sure you are happy. Afterall, you are with your pathetic greek boyfriend."

Y/N froze, how does Mike of all people know about Percy's potential past? Did he overhear Renya? Oh gods, does Octavian know? She is going to die because of her stupid decision to stand for the fish prince.

"Well, are you?"

Just as Y/N was about to tackle Mike to the ground she felt a grip on her hand. It was Percy, who looked just as shocked to be holding her hand as she did. He quickly removed it and rubbed his neck, "Uhh, Gwen, I think that's her name, ya, Gwen is alive."

A flood of relief washed over her. But it didn't make sense, and soon the grief was back just as quick. Percy had to be wrong. She was dead, they had all seen her die. The medic had announced her dead. But all Y/N could manage was a, "What?"

He nodded and Y/N looked over to see Gwen looking as if she had never been dead in the first place. Her mind raced, and suddenly Y/N felt dizzy, as if she had been the one dying. She will be, if what she thinks is true.

"Who are you," Y/N hissed and grabbed his arm bringing him closer, "Who are you really?"

Percy looked completely alarmed by her sudden closeness and he shook his head wildly, "I'd tell you if I knew, honest."

She searched his eyes as if she would find the answers in there, but found none. They looked remarkably like the ocean, probably something to do with being the son of Neptune, or Poseidon, or... either one. Ugh, she was just so confused.

"Alright," Y/N said and took her grip off his arm, then reached for his hand instead to pull him away from the crowd,"I believe you, but I'm not sure everyone else will."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means," Y/N paused for a second to get her bearings as to where the crowd ended and started, "It means that strange things are happening, Percy. And you seem to be in the middle of it. People are going to want to blame you. You show up with a goddess on your back who talks about a prophecy, defeated gorgons single handedly, and you have no memory what so ever, but still managed to live to sixteen years old without coming to camp. Plus, you are a son of Neptune which is never a good thing."

"Wait, wait," Percy said and stopped her from moving any further. But that meant they had to get very close to talk so no one else would hear. She couldn't really move to face him because of the amount of campers around, so it left Percy muttering in her ear. His breath felt so warm against her neck yet still managed to give her shivers, her hand throbbed from his contact, and she noticed he smelled distinctly of the ocean.  It all somehow made her feel very calm and dizzy at the same time.

Her heart pounded in her chest, and it such a strange and unfamiliar feeling yet Y/N managed to feel comfortable the whole time. What was he doing to her? Was it a part of his powers he had inherited from Poseidon?

Y/N didn't think so, she had only felt like this when she was near Venus' children. Only this time it seemed to draw her in more and more until she would lose her train of thought.

When Percy turned to her, she realized he had been speaking the entire time. She turned to face him (the kid that had been blocking her finally moved) but was met by a disgruntled Percy. He was looking far in the distance as if sensing something. Y/N wondered what he was doing, but she didn't have time to think about it.

A thunderous voice rolled across the field: Death loses its hold. This is only the beginning.

Campers drew weapons. Hannibal trumpeted nervously. Renya's pegasus reared, almost throwing her off. Percy's hand squeezed hers tighter, almost like an attempt to ground her, but Y/N barely registered it. The voice angered her more than she could comprehend.

"I know that voice," Percy said. He didn't sound pleased. Y/N couldn't agree more, a visit from her Father was never a enjoyable experience.

An explosion boomed throughout the camp, close enough for Y/N to feel it but far enough to not catch fire. Everyone scrambled backwards as a huge soldier stepped out from the flames.

There stood Mars, weapons and all. Y/N only glared, but he didn't seem to notice her, he never had.

As everyone stepped back, Y/N stepped forward and it was only until she felt Percy's hand yank her back that she realized what she had been doing. Maybe drawing her in was part of being a daughter of Ares. Whatever it was didn't matter because a second later Frank knelt in front of him. Y/N followed suit as many other people had started too.

"That's good," Mars said. "Kneeling is good. it's been a long time since I've visited Camp Jupiter."

Y/N noticed that her hand had slipped from Percy's. It didn't matter too much as they barely knew each other and Y/N felt more embarrassment than anything for holding his hand for that long. What bothered her the most was that Percy remained standing. He was the only one not kneeling. His sword was still in his other hand, and he glared at Mars. Y/N yanked on his shirt as if to try to remind him to kneel next to her.

"You're Ares," Percy said. "What do you want?"

Oh Gods, Y/N thought, of all the times to pick to be Greek he had to choose now? Why, oh why, did Renya choose her to take care of Percy? She was going to get blasted to bits and at the hands of her Father, it really couldn't get any worse.

Y/N wanted to do something, maybe yank Percy down or say something to excuse him, but she didn't know what.

However, instead the god grinned.

"You've got spunk, demigod," he said. "Ares is my Greek form. But to these followers, to the children of Rome, I am Mars-patron of the empire, divine Father of Romulus and Remus."

Y/N wanted to yell out, "You're my Father too! It would do you some good to remember that!" But she didn't.

"We've met," Percy said. "We... we had a fight..."

Y/N wanted to cry. She choose to risk her life to this idiot, who lacked the brains to not only pick a fight with her Father, but tempt fate to do it again?

Instead of picking a fight, Mars, Ares, whatever, scratched his chin, as if trying to recall. "I fight a lot of people. But I assure you-you've never fought me as Mars. If you had, you'd be dead. Now, kneel, as befits a child of Rome, before you test my patience."

Y/N felt herself start to nod and agree with her Father before she remembered that she was in charge of Percy.

"Percy," she whispered, hastily taking hold of his shirt, "please."

Percy glanced at her, then looked back at Ares. He clearly didn't like it, but he knelt next to her.

"Romans, lend me your ears!" He bellowed with a laugh, "I've always wanted to say that. I come from Olympus with a message. Jupiter doesn't like us communicating directly with mortals, especially nowadays, but he has allowed this exception, as you Romans have always been my special people. I'm only permitted to speak for a few minutes so listen up."

He pointed at Gwen. "That one should be dead, yet she's not. The monsters you fight no longer return to Tartarus when they are slain. Thanatos has been chained. The Doors of Death have been forced open and no one is policing them. Gaea allows our enemies to pour forth into the world of morals. Her sons the giants are mustering armies against you-armies that you will not be able to kill. You must find Thanatos and free him from the giants. Only he can reverse the tide."

An unconscious smile made it's way onto her face. A quest? This would be the perfect time for her to show her true potential to the senate and maybe finally, finally join them and achieve her dream.

Mars looked around as if in a trance, and realized everyone was still kneeling. "Oh you can get up now. Any questions?"

Renya got up slowly, "Lord Mars, we are honored."

"Beyond honored," said Octavian. "So far beyond honored-"

"Well?" Mars snapped.

"Well," Renya said, "People will stop dying, therefore Gwen returned?"

"If left unchecked," Mars said with a nod, "even mortals will eventually find it impossible to die. Can you imagine a world in which no one died-ever?"

Octavian raised his hand. "But, ah, mighty all-powerful Lord Mars, if we can't die, isn't that a good thing? If we can stay alive indefinitely-"

Y/N snickered quietly, a world without Octavian was a good one. But then she realized what she had thought, and mentally smacked herself a few times. She would never with death upon anyone, not even Octavian and his creepy staring.

"Don't be foolish, boy!" Mars bellowed. "Endless slaughter with no conclusion? Carnage without any point? Enemies that rise again and again and can never be killed? Is that what you want?"

"You're the god of war," Percy spoke up. "Don't you want endless carnage?"

Y/N's eyes widened and she almost wanted to smack Percy on the back of the head. Again, Y/N waited for the god to strike both of them down, but Mars just grinned like they were two old buddies talking trash.

"Insolent, aren't you? Perhaps I have fought you before. I can understand why I'd want to kill you." Ya, Y/N could understand too. Absolute idiot. "I'm the god of Rome, child. I am the god of military might used for a righteous cause. I protect the legions. I am happy to crush my enemies underfoot, but I don't fight without a reason. I don't want war without end. You will discover this. You will serve me."

"Not likely," Percy said.

Y/N finally found he voice again and scoffed, "Did you not just hear anything he said before the last comment?" Percy turned towards her blankly, "Boys!"

The god laughed, "But you know that it's not just boys, don't you, my daughter?" Y/N's breath hitched. She felt like all the blood in her body had seeped down to her feet. Her Father was talking to her. "I order a quest! You will go north and find Thanatos in the land beyond the gods. You will free him and thwart the plans of the giants. Beware Gaea! Beware her son, the eldest giant! Perhaps if the quest succeeds, and you return by the Feast of Fortuna.. perhaps then your honor will be restored. If you don't succeed, there won't be any camp left to return too. So my advice is: Don't fail."

Percy moved to face her and she felt her hand go along with him before realizing she still had her grip on his shirt. She quickly let go, but Percy didn't seem to notice. He only muttered, "I still don't get what's so great about this feast for tuna."

Y/N burst out laughing and quickly placed her hands over her mouth to stop her giggles. It had been so loud that even Mars turned towards her with a well placed brow but then turned towards Octavian again. "It's feast fortuna, Percy."

"Ya, that's what I said."

"No," Y/N said shaking her head and still laughing, "It's latin for... something. I forget. But the feast is not for tuna, specifically."

"Oh," Percy nodded with a hint of a smile, "That would be cool, though."

"Ya, it would be," Y/N said agreeing, even though she really didn't think having a feast for the worst kind of fish would not be very nice. Actually, catfish would be worse.

Before she could voice her idea about catfish, campers started screaming and she realized that Ares was holding a grenade. Percy pulled Y/N behind him as if she hadn't been trained for this and he was grenade proof.

She stepped around him with a roll of her eyes, Percy smiled sheepishly. Y/N just glared at him.

"There!" Mars finished writing and threw a scroll at Octavian. When did he get a scroll? "A prophecy. You can add it to your books, engrave it on your floor, whatever."

Octavian read the scroll. It seemed he was confused because he looked up at the scroll then to Mars and back again. Y/N wasn't suprised, Mars should have given him a stuffed bear, Octavian seems to understand that more. "This says, 'Go to Alaska. Find Thanatos and free him. Come back by sundown on June twenty-fourth or die."

"Yes," Mars said. "Is that not clear?"

"Well, my lord... usually prophecies are unclear. They're wrapped in riddles. They rhyme, and..."

Mars casually popped another grenade off his belt, "Yes?"

"The prophecy is clear!" Octavian announced quickly, "A quest!"

"Good answer. Thought I was gonna have to blast you, which would have been fun, but you like my daughter, so I have to give you that or Venus will- Nevermind." He tapped his chin. "Now, what else? There was something else... Oh, yes."

Octavian turned bright red. He grabbed the scroll, and then turned around only to look at Y/N again. He sure was looking at her a lot, it was creepy.

She had been so confused about Octavian's actions that she had barely noticed Frank finally get claimed by Ares. She smiled, Frank was her brother! He was a good kid, and an even better friend to Hazel. Y/N liked him.

"My kid Frank Zhang is gonna lead the quest to free Thanatos, unless there are any objections?"

Of course, no one said a word, but she saw Hazel look even more worried. "You can take two companions. Those are the rules. One of them needs to be this kid." He pointed at Percy, "He's gonna learn some respect for Mars on this trip, or die trying. As for the second, wait, isn't there one of this dumb rules where the legionnaires who stand for him have to make sure he doesn't die, or something? I don't really remember. Whatever. Who stands for Percy?"

No, Y/N thought. Her legs turned wobbly. A sense of dread settled over her, worse than the day she had arrived at Camp for the very first time.

She knew what was coming, but she couldn't stop it. She stepped forward against her will.

Mars grinned, "Ahh, yes, my daughter. Nice job taking Kronos' throne, kid. I haven't seen that kind of bravery in a while. I remember mocking Jupiter about his son's job paling in comparison to mine. That was my kid, I said to him. Then, he got Senate instead of you. Who's Prateor?"

Renya raised her hand.

"You were there, weren't you? Unless, you were blind, that was an MVP play. You're not blind, are you?"

Renya looked like she was trying to swallow a mouse. "No, Lord Mars."

"Then make sure she gets her place on the Senate. If anyone has earned it, it's her. Not some cheap lousy job in the Fifth Cohort. We can't have Jupiter's stupid son stopping her potential because he's jealous, can we? Especially now that he's gone." he yelled at the legion, in case anyone hadn't heard which was impossible, she was pretty sure the entire world had heard. Y/N wanted to melt into the dirt and just die. He entire body trembled. She wasn't sure whether to be happy that he noticed her or die form embarrassment and mortification, that he was happy Jason was gone, all because of her.

Mars seemed to realize his mistake too late because his image flickered. Lightning cracked across the sky. "Ugh, well, he's pissed. Whatever. Y/N can be the third, or the fourth. I don't care. You can add another companion because Y/N has to be there for the sea slug. Pick whomever you want. Have one of your senate debates. You all are good at those. Until next time, Romans! Do not disappoint me!"

The second he was gone, Y/N felt a overwhelming amount of eyes on her.

"Holy cucumber sandwich."

[nicostolemybones]

Queer As In Fuck You

Alternative title: the fuckening.

Basically: the fic where Nico is gay and angry and punk (also the title is a song)

Tw: homophobia, mild violence, reclaimed slurs

Nico had decided that today was forever going to be referred to as the fuckening. To say Nico was nervous was an understatement to say the least- because today he'd decided that he was finally gonna come out to everyone officially. It wasn't necessarily because he was ready to, but because there were rumours flying around everywhere about him. The first was that he was having an affair with Annabeth and that's why he was avoiding Percy. The second was that whilst travelling with Reyna and Hedge he'd tried to kiss her and that's what they refused to talk about. The third was that Jason had a crush on Nico and Nico was waiting for him to break up with Piper. And the fourth was that Will was obsessed with Nico and stalking him. The fourth annoyed Nico the most- because it framed Will as some kind of predator, and of course, Will was the only openly gay camper at this particular point. And the fact that just because he made the effort to spend time around Nico and actually cared about his health was being twisted. 

Nico could handle rumours about himself. The rumours about girls kept him closeted and whilst it pissed him off that people thought so low of his morals that he'd cheat, he was used to being painted as the bad guy, and besides, everybody thought he was too weird to ever be loved. But it was hurting others too. It was hurting Annabeth and Percy and Reyna and Jason and Piper, even if they knew the truth.

But Will? Will didn't need this. It rubbed Nico up the wrong way that they'd accuse his boyfriend of being a stalker or being predatory or obsessed towards Nico, especially as it was convenient that nobody slapped the same label on anyone else at camp who showed interest in somebody in some way. No, because only the gay guy could possibly be a predatory person. 

So Nico was going to announce his sexuality and his relationship to camp, because he could see that the rumours were starting to get to Will. At first it was small things- Will stopped leaving good morning texts when he woke up at 5am. Things like Will waiting for Nico to sit at the Apollo table rather than waving him over. And then it was the big things, like Will only seeing Nico after campfire so people couldn't comment on the amount Will called him into the infirmary, and the way Will had asked him if he made Nico uncomfortable, to the time he'd seen Will shaking with anger and on the verge of tears when a 'concerned' camper tried to warn him off. 

So Nico was going to come out. Because the rumours were too much and it was hurting the people he cared about. And he knew- he knew there'd be more vicious rumours afterwards, but at least he could control them, correct them, shut them down. He wanted to be in control of the situation, and he couldn't do that from in the closet. 

Nico wouldn't have chosen to come out just yet, not if the rumours weren't there. It was a shit situation, which angered him, because it shouldn't have to be. He should be able to come out comfortably, but instead, he'd be coming out so he could take control back of his own narrative. It angered him because he'd been painted this picture of this progressive society where people could be openly gay and gay marriage was legal and people could come out without fear- except that wasn't everyone's reality. It wasn't Nico's. And he kept seeing this push to silence his experiences- to cut them out of fiction and cut them out of discussion because society was progressive now and nobody needed or wanted to see the struggles when they could show a happy life. Except Nico did. Nico needed to see people struggling like him, laying awake at night feeling scared and alone and rejected and wrong to know he wasn't alone, to know he could come out the other side. He needed to see the pain to see that it wasn't a tragedy. It wasn't all sunshine and rainbows and it certainly wasn't for Nico. 

So Nico was angry, because he'd been sold an image, a faceless image, of this amazingly accepting place where he could feel safe, except he didn't, and that made people uncomfortable. It made him feel guilty for his struggles with his past, his struggles with microaggressions, his struggles with internalised homophobia, because when he created, vented, his experiences were reduced to a tragic trope doing more harm than good. Nico felt silenced. He wondered how many like him, venting and speaking up about lived experiences through art and writing, were shot down for doing so. 

Nico was angry because he'd been introduced to this amazing community only to find the beginnings of toxicity and identity policing rooting in the fringes online. Nico was angry because he'd been told the world was accepting to find out some still paid the price with their lives or their freedom. Nico was angry because the only rep he could find was dead, on screen for two seconds, stereotype, unnecessarily sexualised, predatory, or bootlicker. Nico was angry because he'd grown up in a time where he learned fear, to be then told of the wonders of modern society, to be shamed for his learned fear, to then find out that the reality was still scary and unsafe for many.

He was happy for those who were accepted and comfortable, for those who were open and free, for those who could rise above the hate, for people like Will who felt able to freely express their identities. Of course he was happy, and of course he wanted their stories to explode across the media and give others hope. Of course he wanted to get away from Bury Your Gays. But he wished that wasn't at the expense of people like him telling their realities. He wished you could have both side by side, not at odds. Because experience was diverse, and the push to homogenise the portrayal of the gay experience into either perfectly happy or tragically horrible was seriously tearing the community apart and leaving people feeling frustrated and silenced on both sides. 

Nico was angry because his reality right now was uncomfortable and his reality was one of pressure. He had to come out because he had to take back control of his own narrative. He was angry because he wasn't the first and he wouldn't be the last. He was angry because he knew if he spoke about how he was violently outed, he'd hear the whisperings of shared experience amongst kids too young to be facing prejudice. He'd have year round campers look to him for advice on how to be like him, how to come out and be happy when their own situations were bleak. 

The first thing he'd tell them was that being gay isn't a tragedy or a death sentence. The tragedy is the existence of prejudice. The next thing he'd tell them is that yes, for some, it was gonna hurt and it would be hard. You'd feel like a newborn deer balancing dangerously on thin cracking ice with no guidance. He'd tell them that yes, safe spaces could be invaded by arseholes and you'd cry and rage and question. But he'd also tell them that that didn't mean they couldn't be happy and comfortable. He'd tell them that they didn't have to come out. He'd tell them that it was okay if all they could do was turn the closet light on to see themselves. He'd tell them that it was okay to exist in your own space and your own head whilst you learned how to navigate the world. He'd tell them that nothing could take away the labels they chose or chose not to take. He'd tell them that they could find power in simply existing. But above all he'd tell them to sing their truths, to create, to vent, to put into prose the pain or the joy or the duality of experiencing both at once. He'd tell them to delve deeper and learn and reach out and accept. He'd tell them to tell the stories they needed to see to feel heard and to heal, whether that be fairytale or tragedy.

Nico would tell them that even if they felt like their hand was forced, that their cards were ripped from their hands and laid bare for all to see, that they could still take back control. They could do what they needed to feel safe, hide if needed, or spit in the face of oppression with a 'so what?'. He'd tell them to fight back if they could fight comfortably, to protect those who couldn't fight for themselves, to find allies and comrades who would boost their voices.

And Nico realised that yeah, fuck it, he'd never been more ready for the fuckening. Because yes, he was still in pain and he was still scared. But fuck the people who made him feel silenced. He refused to be. He was fighting back. He was gay, he was a man in love with a man, a man who held hands with a man, a man who kissed a man, a man who would one day live with a man and fuck a man and unapologetically marry a man. And loving men wasn't all he was, but it was damn important to him and he'd be damned if anyone tried to strip it from his identity. He was scared and he was struggling and he was shamed but he wasn't ashamed to say that he was different. You know what? He was the fuckening and that was a fucking threat.

So yes. Nico's narrative was never going to be sunshine and rainbows. It had been fear and persecution and shame and war and oppression and pain. But now? Now it was a fire, the embers of self-acceptance and self-love glowing in his soul, the sparks of rebellion and pride igniting the flames of passion and rage and all things fuck you.

Things had to change. Nico refused to be silenced and spoken about in a way that he didn't want to be. They'd learn soon enough. Respect his existence or expect resistance. He'd control the rumours now. They wanted something to talk about? They could talk about this.

So Nico pulled on Will's pride vest, and pulled on his own black and pink jeans heavy with chains, and pulled on his biggest angriest boots, and pulled on the black leather waistcoat he'd taken the time to paint and sew with patches and slogans, and he put on his skull necklaces and his black lipstick and raccoon eyes eyeliner and he ruffled his hair until it looked like a bird's nest and he put on his playlist full of rage and gay and shouty lyrics full blast knowing it could be heard through his earbuds and he stepped out of his cabin with his best murderwalk because yes he would stomp on you if you dared say anything, because he wasn't a doormat anymore and he refused to be. He was gay and angry and he'd ripped off the duct tape society had glued to his mouth and he was screaming with confidence and radiating death because fuck society for making him feel like this.

"I'm only gonna say this once," he began firmly. People listened because he made them listen for once. He wasn't done talking and boy would they know it. "If anybody dares to accuse Will of anything ever again, I will come for you, and I will damn you to Tartarus, capisce? You do not get to make rumours about me and my private life. How dare you use me for your sick entertainment, how dare you drag my friends into it. You should be ashamed of yourselves! I am not some article in a gossip magazine for you to fawn and speculate over. I'm not some kid you can poke fun at. Will isn't some uwu gay best friend you have and he's not some butt sex obsessed fiend. And neither am I. We're just two pissed off queers who are sick of your shit and from now on if you've got something to say about it you say it to my face, you got that? You put your money where your mouth is and you face me you fucking cowards. See if it's still funny or exciting to call us slurs behind our backs when an angry faggot is done being scared. Shout at me what you like because I've reclaimed it all. You do not get to silence us, you do not get to control our narratives, you do not get to police our identities and our relationships. Respect our existence or expect resistance, you got it? Good. You wanna learn how to be an ally? Listen to us. Will's happy to educate you and so is Google. You're an ally to all or an ally to none. You don't get to pick and choose which parts of the community deserve respect. So yes, I'm fucking gay as fuck for Will Solace and if you got a problem with that then tough!"

An Ares camper rose to his challenge. Walked to his face and spit at his feet. Nico elbowed his face and kicked his nuts and shoved his face into the dirt. "I wouldn't do that, pretty boy," Nico warned, resting his boot on his cheek. "Anyone else wanna try me? No. Good." Nico let him go and walked straight over to Will, who was staring with his mouth open. Nico was terrified of the crowd still watching but fuck them Nico was feeling brave and bravery wasn't the absence of fear. He was gonna live and living meant pushing through it all. 

"Wow," Will managed, "gods, just kiss me, fuck, that was- just wow!" So Nico did. Nico kissed him there and then, in the middle of camp, in front of everyone, because dammit he was a man who loved men and Will was his man and he was pissed off and living off spite. He had a point to prove and that point was that his existence was not up for debate. And boy did he intend to make it loud and fight for others who needed it. 

[lamentsof-bee]

one ghost king to rule them all

ALRIGHT SO - i finished my self indulgent character analysis of our little gay lord and savior, nico di angelo. 

and let me tell you. THE PAIN really just makes him more gothy and i’m here for it. 

under the cut if y’all wanna read it. your choice. except wendy, she has to read it bc i said so. 

Summary: 

There were many boys at one point. Boys with flames on their skin. Salt water in their hair. Lightning in their veins. And they all mattered…

The one with the animal heart and the one with a halo made of sun.

Each and every single one mattered.

But not like the boy born of shadows.

Never like him.

[Nico di Angelo would never walk a straight and narrow path, Hestia promised him that much. His would always be a journey marred by sadness, distrust and destruction. But sometimes, beauty can be born of hate. And acceptance can be found in even the darkest of nights.]

[An in-depth look at Nico's journey from the cliff of Bar Harbour to the Battle of Gaea]

Read it on AO3. 

There were many boys at one point. Boys with flames on their skin. Salt water in their hair. Lightning in their veins. And they all mattered…

The one with the animal heart and the one with a halo made of sun.

Each and every single one mattered.

But not like the boy born of shadows.

Never like him.

Nico di Angelo remembers the death of his mother.

He was young but still, there is an imprint of the year 1941 on his brain, and the crash that came with Zeus destroying the ceiling.

The faint glow of his father’s power still wakes him at night. A black force field that could only be described as suffocating. The warmth that the Lord of the Underworld could create was never quite inviting though. It licked at you, like hot flames whose only goal was to singe. He had shielded Nico and Bianca from the physical harm, they had survived, but he left them torn.

River Lethe was strong, strong enough to wipe even a Titan’s memories Nico would later find out, but no power was stronger than a mother’s love. The memories of vows of vengeance that Hades swore had faded, the white marble of the Washington D.C. hotel had withered. But Maria di Angelo’s red lips and olive skin will never leave Nico’s mind. Nor will the first moment his father chose to protect him.

For a long time Nico would think it was the last. If only he knew back then how wrong he’d be.

They travelled some with a dark haired lawyer that asked but never listened. And they ended up in the Lotus Hotel.

Nico, even at his young age, heard whispers of The Child of the Eldest Gods and a prophecy to end all prophecies. It was drowned out by the lights of Las Vegas and the inviting doors of the Lotus Hotel.

A month passed for Nico and he and Bianca were swept away by a new lawyer with the same habit of questioning and ignoring. The world outside had changed. Washington D.C. had new subway stations, motorized vehicles had more efficient and ugly, everyone seemed to have something called a ‘cell-phone’.

They were taken to Westover Hall, a military academy in Bar Harbour. Things had changed, Bianca wore a hat and learned everything about this new, modern world that she could. Nico picked up Mythomagic and found himself loving something for the first time since his mother died.

There was so much heartbreak since then.

So many deaths. So many losses.

Nico swore he wouldn’t lose anyone else. Not after his mother had gone so suddenly. So he made Percy Jackson promise to keep Bianca safe.

Percy could do it! Nico insisted to himself. Percy was strong and experienced and he’d been on a quest before. His hair was dark and his eyes sparkled, Nico liked that a lot. Nico knew Mythomagic, he knew what kind of points the monsters would have that his sister would be facing. And she needed someone to watch her six. Someone who knew how.

Percy could do that.

He tried his best to keep his spirits up after the group’s departure.

It was still cool, that Camp Half-Blood was like Mythomagic brought to life. The lava climbing wall and real life land mines made for an interesting stay.

But still…he felt quite lonely.

He’d never been without Bianca before…

He’d never been alone…

On his first lone night, Nico stood apart from the campers gathered around the fire. They sang together off-key and toasted marshmallows as if they didn’t have a care in the world. Everyone seemed happy, everyone seemed at home.

Except Nico.

And that one young girl in a mousy brown dress with eyes like fire.

She stared into the blazes, her gaze softening as it grew with the intensity of the love around the hearth. She seemed so ordinary. Without thinking Nico drew towards her wanting to get a better look at her face. When he did, he noticed it was all together unremarkable. Freckles on the bridge of her nose, brown hair to match her dress but she had flames in her eyes. 

She looked at him and said nothing. Still, there seemed to be an invitation in the air.

He took a seat next to her and stared in the blazes.

‘Your hearth,’ she said quietly. ‘It’s so small.’ Sorrow clouded her voice.

Nico felt vulnerable and naked. His hearth was practically empty. His father would feed him to the dogs, his mother had passed before he could grow old enough to remember her and his sister had left him behind. The coals of his hearth were barely glowing. He felt as if there was only one left and its ember was extinguishing.

‘A small hearth is still a home.’ His voice was as quiet as hers. His eyes never leaving the fire.

‘And home you will always return.’

The smile she gave him was small and the wisdom in her eyes seemed far beyond her years. She looked of Nico’s age but her demeanour betrayed her.

‘You have far to travel, Nico di Angelo.’ Her tone sounded sombre again. ‘You have much to face. But for your kindness you will be rewarded. You shall always find a place at my hearth.’

He wanted to ask her how he knew his name and what exactly she was talking about but a warmth filled his stomach. A sense of calm and serenity washed over him and suddenly it didn’t matter so much that his hearth was small or he had been left behind. This fire was warm enough and a hearth could be rebuilt with time.

His life had been touched by a goddess.

Since his time at Camp Half-Blood, Nico’s powers had grown. He felt the souls passing on, meeting the ferryman at the River Styx. He felt the marble shake with his father’s anger and watched as the flowers wilted when he walked.

But nothing quite made him feel like the Son of Death than when Percy came back without Bianca and only a Mythomagic figurine to make up for it.

Nico had wondered before why his father had such rage built up inside him. Why he couldn’t just accept the life his siblings chose for him? But in that moment, Nico understood.

With every step Bianca took towards her hearing, Nico felt the pang echo in his chest. As if he were standing there with her, he could see the gold masks leering down at him. He felt the ringing in his ears.

The rage exploded inside him like a volcano and sizzled the pity Percy tried to shovel on him. The hero he had in his mind, the greatness Percy Jackson encompassed, had disappeared. The fluttering in his stomach, the butterflies that took flight when he looked at Percy, they withered and died as Bianca was sentenced.

The amorous feelings, as amorous as a ten year old kid could feel, he had towards Percy were marred with darkness and stained with hate. Still… when the skeleton warriors pounced Nico couldn’t help it.

He saw Percy get disarmed. The ringing in his ears increased. He brought his hands to his head, trying to shake away the sound. The darkness grew inside of him, like a ball of energy ready to combust until he couldn’t take it anymore.

‘No! Go away!’

The ground split open and the skeletons were swallowed by flames and earth. One crunch later and not a single bone was left to be found.

Panting, Nico’s eyes moved from the fissure in the ground to Percy. He looked back at the kid, wide-eyed and awestruck. Bianca may have died but Darkness has just risen.

One step forward was all it took for Nico to shout a curse at Percy and run into the shadows of the woods. With this he would leave behind any feelings that Percy Jackson awoke in him.

- 

The road to Daedalus is dark and messy. Minos whispers in his ears with a voice as smooth as silk and provided both comfort and education. The things Nico learned with Minos he will never forget. Shadow travel, raising of spirits, conferring with the dead. It took some practice but eventually Nico made it back from his accidental trips to China and succeeded in summoning a soul.

Theseus’ words were muddled and unhelpful. His gaze drawn constantly to Nico’s ghostly guide, unsettling the young boy. He senses your power. That was what Theseus had said but he hadn’t said who. Darkness closed in again and Nico was alone, no one but Minos and an empty pit.

When he faces Percy next, Nico is disappointed to find that his heart still skips a beat. He likened it to a minor heart attack first and thought perhaps he’d be able to find Bianca that way but when the sensation passed with Percy’s eyes still on him, Nico only looked back coldly.

Your soul is worth nothing to me! He wanted to shout at Percy. How dare he think his soul could be exchanged for Bianca’s? Bianca’s soul was worth thousands of Percy’s. No amount of good looks and boyish charm could save him from that.

‘Let’s ask Bianca.’

That was what Percy had said. As if her appearance would rectify the wrong he had caused her. As if she would appear in front of Nico simply because Percy willed it.

If it were true, if Bianca showed this time, Nico would wring Percy’s neck.

He poured the root beer into the pit and let the words come from the deepest part of him. The chant brought about a mist and spirits followed it to kneel by the depth.

The chanting became forced and as Minos lowered himself and drank.

‘Be gone, Minos!’ He ordered.

The ghost flickered, hesitated and tried to stay. Nico’s voice strained as his power fluctuated and the ghost obeyed, albeit reluctantly.

The figure that followed formed into the glowing spirit of Bianca di Angelo. Silver snowboard jacket, olive skin and sad eyes.

She gazed at Percy and rejected his apology. ‘I made my own choice. I don’t regret it.’

Watching her raised, the words spilled out of Nico. ‘Why didn’t you answer me sooner? I’ve been trying for months!’

His heart breaks when she says, ‘I was hoping you would give up.’

‘Give up?! I’m trying to save you!’

Her hand stretches towards her little brother. He’d grown since they’d seen each other last. His eyes were colder, surrounded by dark rings. He’d become taller too. ‘Don’t do this.’ She said quietly. ‘Percy is right.’

‘You must listen to me,’ she implored, ‘holding a grudge is dangerous for a child of Hades.’ Her hand evaporated as it got close to his face. ‘It is our fatal flaw.’

She cocked her head, asking him for understanding.

‘You have to forgive. You have to promise me this.’

He shook his head like a child refusing to let their parent leave before they fell asleep.

‘You are close to the truth now,’ she told him. ‘It is not Percy you’re mad at, Nico. It’s me.’

The wound he had been trying to cover broke open. The scab felt raw and wet. He felt the hurt leak from his heart through his body until even his toes were drowned in sorrow.

‘You must overcome your anger. Or else it will be your doom.�� She insisted. Don’t do this her soul begged.

‘No! I am the son of Hades. I can.’

 For the second time, a dead demigod spoke of Nico’s power before disappearing. It hurt all that much more because it was Bianca. When the mist cleared there was nothing left in the pit but a leftover smell of root beer and bad barbeque.

It rattled him to his core. The strength he felt surge inside of him. The orb of darkness that pulsed, sometimes so strongly that it forcefully pushed out of him and dark tendrils followed him when he walked. Souls cowered where he went, even nature couldn’t seem to thrive in his presence. Maybe he was destined for a life in the labyrinth. A life filled with darkness and solitude.

He yearned for laughter and peace. He wished he could imagine a life happiness. He thought, if he could picture it, which he can’t but if he could, maybe Percy would be there. Maybe he’d hold out his hand towards Nico and all would be forgiven. Maybe he would know that Bianca would give him her blessing and he would finally rest knowing that he was okay. That he was not deviant. That he was only human…

But he wasn’t.

He felt the darkness move inside of him like a pool of ink staining a white shirt. Noticeable and inevitable. When the dracanae captured him, his only thought was that he hadn’t found Percy yet. Minos betrayed him – not that Nico was surprised. He’d played enough Mythomagic to know who King Minos had been and his power over Darkness was strong enough to know who Minos had become.

The battle started and Nico was pushed to the ground. The iron on his chains bit into his wrists but as he watched the people he knew – his friends? – fight, he felt helpless. Annabeth duelled with her knife, Percy sparring with his sword. They weren’t holding their own. The emotion rammed into his chest and made the Darkness surge. Like iron against fire, the chains melted into smoke as they left Nico’s wrists. This is not how he would go down.

Percy would not die before he had atoned for his sins, not before Nico could understand why his heart still skipped a beat when the dark haired boy looked at him. Minos would not rise again to call himself the ghost king. Luke would pay for his treachery.

He starred at his ghostly former companion.

‘You do not control me, young fool.’ Minos sneered. ‘All this time, I have been controlling you. A soul for a soul, yes. But it was not your sister who will return from the dead. It is I!’

Spirits shimmered around Minos as his body solidified. The whirling energy inside Nico forced his entire body to awaken. His gaze hardened, his look one of ice.

You dare speak to Son of the Dead that way?

‘No.’ Nico insisted. ‘I am the son of Hades. Be gone!’

If looks could kill, Minos would have returned to the grave again.

‘You have no power over me. I am the lord of the spirits! The ghost king!’

A crazed look fell into Nico’s eyes as his dead tilted. He drew his stygian sword with intention and stared Minos in the face.

‘No.’ He held up his sword. ‘I am.’

He plunged the sword into the floor and ran through it like butter. He called to all the spirits that clawed at his feet and his mind. He ordered them to take back Minos and put back where he belonged, under the rule of Hades. The windows cracked and the ground boomed and suddenly the spirits around Minos veered towards him. When the fissure opened in the ground, much like the one that had appeared in Camp Half-Blood, Minos could not struggle against the souls holding him down. He could do nothing but disappear into the depths of the Underworld where he would forever walk with Nico’s shadow over his head. Spending an eternity knowing he had challenged the wrong Darkness.

The energy he needed to banish Minos sucked more out of Nico than he’d like to admit. His olive complexion turned pale, his sword hand could barely lift the weight of his blade. Still, he followed Percy, Annabeth and a strange red-haired girl called Rachel when they fastened him into make-shift wings.

They stopped at a gift shop, attempting to find a way back into the maze.

‘Daedaulus isn’t dead.’ Nico told them when they wondered if the labyrinth was even still alive. ‘That I know for sure.’

Percy thanked him as Annabeth and Rachel walked ahead. For a second it felt like pure adrenaline running through Nico’s body. He pushed the feeling away and muttered something about being even for the fight on the ranch and raising Bianca.

‘Minos was right.’ Percy looked at him confused. They walked in silence for a while. ‘Daedalus should die. To cheat death for so long. It’s not natural.’

‘So you were going to trade Daedalus’ soul for Bianca’s?’ Percy voice doesn’t sound accusing, more like the pieces are finally falling into place and he can see the big picture.

Nico walks in silence wondering if he should bare his soul. He looks at Percy and sees a glimmer of the boy he admired. The one that makes his blood pump faster than usual. He figures, now is as good a time as any – since he’s not coming back.

‘It’s not easy, you know. Having only the dead for company.’ His words are quiet and his eyes downcast. ‘Knowing I’ll never be accepted by the living due to my heritage. Having only the dead respect me, if only out of fear.’

‘You could be accepted.’ Percy answered. And there it was, that naïve optimism that made Percy so attractive. His blind desire to help and save and foster. But good intentions not a good life make.

Look at what happened to Luke. 

- 

Kronos strode towards them, shimmering gold eyes, Luke’s short cropped blonde hair and scythe in his hand – ready to take whatever path he deemed worthy.

Nico knew the only escape would be to venture back into the labyrinth but Kronos’ domineering voice giving orders shook him to his core.

As it always did when he was afraid, the Darkness within him pulsed.

‘NO!’ Nico yelled as Kronos ordered his cronies to target them. He clapped his hands together and pushed his energy outward. If it would have been visible, people would have seen a shadow fall over the fortress. A spire of black rock erupted and tore the building to pieces. Kronos and his servants were left under piles of debris.

And Nico had outed himself. Well, not outed as… he couldn’t even think that. But outed as one of the Big Three.

When Percy had said as much, all Nico could do was shrug. ‘Big deal.’

What was one more person on his tail.

- 

They find their way back into the maze and into the cave of the Nature God, Pan. Nico’s life had been touched by the Gods before but this time, this time it was different. The shimmering form of Pan sat before them, glistening off the ruby and sapphire walls.

His pull so strong that even Nico fell to his knees in respect. Yet, there was something eery about the whole thing. Like Nico could feel the energy being sucked out of the cave and towards nothingness. As if it were only a fragment of a life, a well-kept memory of something already passed…

Only once did the god acknowledge his presence.

‘Dear Grover,’ Pan said, ‘you must accept the truth.’ His gaze moved towards Nico’s bowed head. ‘Your companion, Nico, he understands.’

Nico nodded slowly, looking up at the god. His answer hesitant. ‘He’s dying.’ Grover made a strangled sound. ‘He should have long ago. This…this is more like a memory…’ As Nico said the words, the world seemed to make sense again.

The god had held on long enough for his disciple to find him but still, the years had waned his strength and he was but a collection of hope left over. Fading was a god’s punishment for not staying relevant in the modern world. And the modern world had no place for nature the way it had in the past. The times of forest foraging and daylight dwelling was over, it was replaced with technology and skyscrapers and time running out.

Nico could feel the sand in Pan’s hourglass running out. It was about to let the last granule drop.

He gave each of Nico’s companions a message, a gift of wisdom. Only Nico was ignored. What could Pan teach Nico about nature that he didn’t already know. His power was the most natural of all – to watch life end and return to its birthing place.

Still the god’s words struck a chord with Nico.

The only salvation you must make for yourself. Each of you must.

Some souls have escaped the claws of death but that day, one long over due returned. When the lights faded, the cave was dark and the moss on the walls had receded. As had the holy presence that lured them there.

Nico felt the essence of the god disappear, until not even a whisper of it remained in the undead realm.

There was no time for rest or mourning. Though it seemed Grover would take time for the latter eventually. It took only one uncomfortable pegasus ride for Nico to fall back into his thoughts about Percy. The sea demigod was always protecting him, always bargaining with him, trying to make sure that Nico was safe. It was a selfless act, stupid, but still selfless. And for that Nico had to give him credit. The way Percy had chastised him for revealing his powers to Kronos made him aware of the fact that Percy had kept his secret. He hadn’t told anyone about Nico’s birth right or his heritage. And he had done it to try to save him.

- 

The battle wasn’t over though. Luke’s plan, Kronos’ plan – whatever, had succeeded. They had infiltrated camp and were running rampage on the grounds.

It was quite a sight to see – all the demigods coming together to fight for their lives. A dozen dracaenae were heading towards the cabins when Percy alerted Nico of the threat.

Taking a deep breath, he raised his hands, straining as if an invisible force was resisting their pull upwards. ‘Serve me!’

The earth trembled and parted in the midst of the dracenae. Undead warriors, all answering to Nico, rose from the depths and engaged the enemies. He pushed as much of his power as he could into the corpses, daring them to oppose his will.

He sunk to his knees as the soldiers drew more and more of his energy to stay aboveground.

He gave and he gave and he gave. He watched the lady dragons get pulverized until his vision started to fade and blackness surrounded him.

When he woke, a figure was standing above him with a canteen of nectar. The people in his vision slowly started reforming from their three-fold selves and his sight cleared. Percy was hovering over him with more people fanned out.

His eyes landed on Daedalus.

‘I came to correct my mistake.’ The words struck Nico. The labyrinth could not continue, that much was clear. The only thing left to do was offer up one last sacrifice, a last trade to compensate for the damage the old inventor had caused.

Annabeth protested. ‘You won’t get a fair trial! The spirit of Minos sits in judgement –’

The inventor smiled at her ruefully. ‘I will take what comes.’ He turned to Nico. ‘And trust in the justice of the Underworld, such as it is. That is all we can do, isn’t it?’

Nico’s dark look didn’t waver Daedalus’ spirits. The boy nodded in agreement.

‘Will you take my soul for ransom, then? And use it to reclaim your sister?’

Nico’s eyes lowered and for a second he wished he could act like the boy that he was. But he knew he could not. Instead, he had to act like the son he was born to be.

‘No,’ His answer was firm. ‘I will help release your spirit. But Bianca has passed. She must stay where she is.’ Thus is law of nature.

Daedalus looked at him with reverence. ‘You are becoming wise, son of Hades.’ There was a pause. ‘I am ready to see my son…and Perdix. I must tell them how sorry I am.’

Getting to his feet, with much effort, Nico turned to the old inventor with his sword. He raised a hand towards the forehead of the old man and whispered ‘Your time is long since come. Be released and rest.’

The inventor smiled with relief and released as sigh so deep it seemed to have been held for eons. Slowly his skin became transparent until the gears behind it became visible. The machinery halted its whirling and the old man turned to ash and blew away with the wind.

Nico shared the relief the inventor had felt. Releasing a soul so long overdue and feeling it return to the depths of the earth had granted him some freedom. The souls bound to the mortal plane that evaded the clutches of Thanatos weighed him down more than he had realized.

- 

Post-battle Nico spent a short time in the Apollo cabin’s med-bay where the head councillor prodded his bruises and poked his scratches with very little comment. The councillor seemed wary of him.

Nico felt the vitality in the cabin. There were plenty of campers running around and plenty of patients to be treated. Nico felt the life of each being in the room. There was a plump blonde boy at the back of the room. There was a small gathering around him, a kid maybe slightly older than Nico stood with his head bowed. The kid in the bed was dead. Nico felt his life extinguish on the battle field, still the medics tried to breathe life back into lungs and jump-start his heart with compressions.

It was no use.

Nothing good was going to come of the Son of Death hanging around in a place meant for healing.

Nico got to his feet, using his knees to push himself upwards. He spared a glance at Castor, the fallen demigod, a son of Dionysus if he remembered correctly. He had liked Mythomagic and had a twin. In another life, if Castor had lived and Nico weren’t shunned for his heritage, perhaps they could have been friends.

A sigh escaped Nico’s lips as he turned. He briefly caught the eye of the small boy standing at Castor’s bedside. A mop of blonde hair almost covered his blue eyes but still, they looked into Nico’s, wide eyed and wondering. As if to ask why are you leaving?

The implication of the question stopped Nico short.

He shook the blue eyes out of his mind and turned.

Nico had a lot of work to do. On himself. On discovering who he really was, where he came from and what his purpose was. Camp Half-Blood couldn’t help with that. There was a reason why Hades didn’t have a cabin on the grounds. It was best to keep death as far away from a haven as possible. And Camp Half-Blood was a sanctuary if Nico ever did see one.

He left camp with a short goodbye to Hestia. The goddess didn’t bless his travel or his journey but she did give him some advice.

Wisdom will come to you when you least expect it. And someday you must face your own shadow. Beware, Son of Hades, the path you walk will never be straight but it will lead you home.

He didn’t know what to make of her words but he chose to guard them closely and maybe soon they would become clearer.

He travelled the underworld and began to feel more at home amongst the souls that transcended through the realm. Sometimes Ms O’Leary joined him, more often than not though, he travelled alone. Daedalus’ hearing took place and although Minos pushed for a malice filled punishment, the Lord of the Underworld had other ideas. It was the first time Nico saw his father enact any type of power within his realm. Minos stewed quietly behind his golden mask and obeyed his master. He visited his father at court and found nothing but malevolence boiling below the surface of their relationship. Questions about his mother and the life he led before the Lotus Hotel remained a mystery.

Time passed quickly and before he knew it, days had turned into months.

He became familiar with the happenings of the Underworld and the created a map inside his mind. He placed all the rivers in his model and added in Asphodel and the Fields of Punishment. It was only when he got to the River Styx that he discovered something that may change the way his wind blew.

A plan formed in his mind.

A bargain made with his father.

And then, he went off to return to the one person that scared him the most.

He watched Percy from the bottom of the fire escape . The demigod gently placed a sprig into a small planter box and sprinkled it with nectar. The look on Percy’s face was almost melancholic, it pulled at Nico’s heartstrings. He took a breath and stepped into the shadows, and tried to leave any feelings for Percy at the bottom of the stairs.

‘Nice plant.’ He said, stepping out of the shadows.

Watching Percy Jackson jump was one of the few pleasures Nico had left in life.

‘Sorry.’ He said, not meaning it. ‘Didn’t mean to startle you.’

Percy’s eyes looked greener in the moonlight, the sprig that had grown in the plant box and the way he had handled it made Nico wonder if he’d ever be able to treat something with so much care.

For a mere moment, he wondered if he might, someday, be able to treat Percy with such care.

A compliment was on the tip of his tongue. Instead he said ‘I want to make you an offer.’

All business, all the time.

Over blue cake and soda, Nico explained to Percy what he was proposing. How Percy could save the world, how the tide of the upcoming war could be changed. It was risky and really, really stupid, still Nico was convincing.

But Percy was scared.

For that, Nico could not blame him. Still, he had to push.

He decided what Percy needed was time. And what he needed was answers. So he left Percy in New York to stew over his plan with the intention to return within the month.

It took him much longer than that. Almost a year passed before Nico next contacted Percy to set their plan into motion.

It brought him back to his time in the Underworld. Back when he thought there was no place a son of Hades couldn’t see. He should have stayed home, even if home was a ghastly castle made of black marble that provided a highway for souls to transcend their mortal lives. 

There had been some comfort there though.

There had been Bob…

The most gentle of giants, the friendliest Titan in the world.

‘Time passes quickly.’ Bob had said to Nico as he cleaned the stairs of the palace. Though how that was possible for an immortal Titan, Nico did not know.

Nico sat on the marble staircase and watched the giant.

‘Never quickly enough…’ Nico had muttered under his breath. He had meant not quickly enough to forgo the suffering he was enduring but Bob had misunderstood.

‘You’ll see your friends soon.’ His tone was light.

‘Friends…’ Nico hesitated.

‘Bob would like to have friends.’ The Titan’s expression was thoughtful, melancholy even.

‘You’d need a friend like Percy.’ The worlds rolled out of Nico before he could stop them.

‘Percy…’ Bob looked at Nico curiously.

‘Yeah, you know…’ He swallowed his pride. ‘Someone who looks out for you when you’re in trouble. Who comforts you when you’re down and tells you no matter what it’s gonna be alright.’

‘Your Percy… he does this?’

Your Percy.

It shouldn’t have struck a chord with Nico but it did.

‘Yeah.’ He swallowed hard. ‘He does.’

-

He took the breadcrumbs his father gave him about his mother’s birth and followed them to Olympus. While he was in the area, he headed to Mount Othrys. Any chance to eavesdrop on a Titan was a good chance to take. While he was there he sent a dream vision to Percy, this was the time to push. Time was running out and he was running out of leads.

‘You see Percy?’ His voice barely a whisper. ‘You’re running out of time.’

A change in the air told him to return to his father’s realm. A shift was about to take place.

He followed his impulse back to Styx where he went to speak with Charon, the ferryman of the Underworld. Before he could greet the Spirit of Boundaries a presence drew his eye. Between a small group of people he found the head of tall dark familiar person. Beckendorf looks at him with recognition and regret.

Nico walks up feeling a little numb.

Beckendorf had been the best of them. Always the first to take the lead, the first to sacrifice, the first to comfort. He was in the wrong place. And yet, Nico knew that Beckendorf’s mortal life was over.

‘Hey.’ Beckendorf’s low voice was still comforting.

‘Hey.’

‘Nice place you got here.’ Beckendorf raises an eyebrow in jest.

Nico snorts. ‘Thanks.’

He sobers and turns to his tall companion. ‘Follow me. You don’t have to wait in line.’

Beckendorf walks behind Nico, who leads him to Charon and passes the ferryman with a nod.

They speak little on their journey to the hearing. Beckendorf asks if Percy survived the fall from the Princess Andromeda and for one awful second Nico needs to go searching for his soul and hope to Gods that he doesn’t find it. He breathes a sigh of relief. Percy’s soul has not passed on. He survived the explosion.

He tells Beckendorf as much and mentions that for his heroic sacrifice he will be granted admission to Elysium. Nico brings up rebirth but Beckendorf only smiles and shakes his head.

‘I’m waiting for someone.’

His stance is resolute. His eyes are clear.

‘If you see Percy…’ Beckendorf smiles ruefully. He will never see Percy again. ‘Tell him it wasn’t his fault. That he shouldn’t beat himself up over this. I’m good here. I’ve got something worth waiting for.’

Watching Beckendorf pass through the gates towards the court of judgement made Nico feel dizzy. He had seen demigods fall before, he had felt souls pass on a-plenty but this was different. Beckendorf had been the most competent soldier amongst their legion. And still, he had fallen. It hit close to home.

He needed to protect what little he had left.

He needed to protect Percy.

And he would.

After he found out about his mother.

The plan wasn’t thought through. He doesn’t know why he trusted his father and betrayed Percy. Tricking a guy into an audience with your undead Lord of the Dead father is the best way to get someone to fall in love with you – not. Still, there were some things that took precedent. And the di Angelo history was one of them. One of the few. Okay, the only thing.

The look of betrayal on Percy’s face had Nico looking away in shame.

The throat pin in the cell was definitely deserved.

‘I swear on the River Styx, I didn’t know what he was planning.’ Nico heard the rush of water in his ears as the oath was sworn.

‘You know what your dad is like!’

The anger was real and justified. Nico hadn’t given Percy any reason to trust him in the past and he may have just marred any chance he had of getting Percy to trust him in the future.

But Percy bathed anyway.

Even when Achilles told him to turn back.

It will make you powerful. But it will also make you weak.

Nico watched Percy stare in Achilles’ face and say no. If Luke had bathed, then Percy must too. It is the only way he would stand a chance.

Let the gods witness I tried.

The boys shivered as the wisdom of the greatest mortal hero to ever live rolled down their backs. Achilles disappeared and the river kept churning.

The minutes Nico spent on shore seemed endless. He counted the pebbles at his feet and tried to ignore the river that had swallowed his friend. A son of Poseidon couldn’t drown…right?

This was the only way. This was the right choice.

Nico repeated the words in his mind like a mantra. This will save him. This will set him free.

There was no doubt in Nico’s mind that Percy was the hero of the prophecy. That knowledge both hurt and healed him. He knew the object of his affection was going to be a great hero, was an honourable half blood but the same hero’s hubris may come at too high a cost. Nico would never be the child of the prophecy. It had nothing to do with his father’s taunts of Your sister would have done a better job. And more to do with the fact that Percy was just cut from hero cloth. He inspired loyalty and trust…and love.

And if he took this dip. If Percy came out of the river alive then he would be able to survive the prophecy and he would be saved!

Then we would thank Nico!

Then maybe…

Maybe they could start over.

-

After that night the trust was broken between Nico and Percy and maybe that was for the best. He stayed in the Underworld and attempted to persuade Hades to join the fight.

It was futile.

Their relationship, what was left of it, was strained and strenuous at best. Nico tried to implore his father but to no avail. He couldn’t understand why Hades would rather watch the world burn and him with it than protect what he loved by serving the greater good.

Only when he dug up Persephone’s flower beds and called upon his mother did he begin to understand the god he called his father.

‘Why? What is he hiding?’ Nico had asked Bianca when she took her mother’s place.

‘Pain. Hatred. This knowledge will only hurt you. Remember what I said.’

He clawed his way through her image, it was replaced by a series of scenes like something out of a movie.

He watched his own mother’s death and the destruction of life as he knew it. He felt he couldn’t take it all in until a girl entered the picture and Hades began to chant.

His eyes fully black, Hades looked possessed by an otherworldly creature. ‘I swear as long as my children remain outcasts, as long as I labour under the curse of your Great Prophecy, the Oracle of Delphi will never have another mortal host. You will never rest in peace. No other will take your place. Your body will wither and die, and still the Oracle’s spirit will be locked inside you. You will speak your bitter prophecies until you crumble to nothing. The Oracle will die with you!’

The screams of the girl would make Nico wake up in cold sweat for many years to come. So chilling was it, watching his father enact his rage on an innocent bystander.

Now Nico knew why Bianca had warned him. Grudges were fatal to the children of Hades because they had been fatal to their father. A curse born of hatred had caused the world to fall into chaos and it was their duty, no, only Nico’s duty now, to atone for the sins his father had committed.

 It must have been a miracle that Hades decided to join the war, that Luke woke up at Annabeth’s injury, that Olympus didn’t fall at the hands of Kronos that day.

Hades was welcomed into the throne room with pats on the back and words of welcome. And Nico sat at the foot of his make-shift throne feeling like he might finally be worthy of his father’s attention. The Curse of the Oracle had been broken. Or so it seemed…

The next few weeks are something out of a dream. Nico is welcomed the same way his father was and for a while things seem to be looking up. He built his cabin with style. Obsidian walls and green fire torches. No cabin would compare.

He spent a little time in the med-bay again. This time his wounds were minor but his health had deteriorated due to his shadow travel. He would need to get stronger to shadow travel more often. The head counsellor was nowhere to be seen. The kid he had seen at Castor’s bedside treated his wounds instead. His bright eyes and sunny disposition were jarring. Still there was something calming about the guy.

‘Solace. Will Solace.’

After the blonde, Will, had covered Nico’s wounds in nectar and band aids, he held out his hand.

‘Right uh, Nico. di Angelo.’

He hesitantly grabbed Will’s hand, standing up. To his surprise, Will didn’t shiver or back away from Nico. He grasped Nico’s hand softly and gave it a shake.

‘Nice fighting and all that.’

‘Oh uh thanks.’ Nico, who had never really interacted much with people, became aware that it might be normal to compliment Will as well. ‘Nice… um.. healing and stuff.’

If Will thought his reaction was strange, he didn’t show it. He simply flashed Nico a blinding smile and threw up a peace sign.

‘Thanks.’ He gave Nico a wink. ‘See you round.’

With that he turned and exited.

The people he met – Annabeth, Grover, Rachel … Percy… they all became his friends. They became his reason for continuing his journey. Maybe the curse of Hades really had been broken. Nico finally felt like he had something worth returning to.

-

There were so many experiences that led Nico to becoming the person he was destined to be.  Meeting Percy at Camp Jupiter had shaken him but he had remained strong. His father’s will would undoubtedly win. And his word’s rang true. Go to them. It is important you make this connection. The path was never going to be easy. Hestia had all but promised him that much. Whether Tartarus had always been part of that destiny, though, was unclear. But Nico knew if he could give it back – he would.

The pull of the pit had been too strong. It sucked him in like a black hole and left him feeling naked, empty and helpless. Still, he followed it. He knew he would find the Doors at the end of the burning road. Nevertheless, he drank the fire water and faced the Goddess of Misery, Akhlys. She had congratulated him on his sorrow and whined ‘Child of Hades, what more could I do to you? You are so perfect. So much sorrow, so much pain.’

He could add it to the things that kept him up at night. Her blood streaked face, his distress mirrored in her tears on the shield of Hercules. He would never forget the true face of misery and how it had welcomed him home.

In a way it seemed right for him to be overwhelmed in Tartarus. Overrun by Gaea’s minions. In a way, he had seen it coming. He had prepared for the worst.

The pomegranate seeds he ate had been a last resort. As the air in the bronze jar thinned and his pomegranate supply dwindled, he wondered if this was all he had been meant for.

To be a puppet in another god’s game.

He had been so close. He had found the Doors of Death. He almost saved them.

He had only just gotten Hazel back and now he would be the one that needed finding in the Fields of Asphodel.

He thought suffocating under Rome in a bronze jar would be the worst thing to happen to him since losing Bianca.

And then…

And then he watched Percy and Annabeth fall to their doom.

Lead them there! Percy had begged him. Promise me!

He saw them fall into blackness and almost jumped after them. He clawed at the rocks and bellowed and cried. Not again. Nico screamed until his lungs gave out. Bring them back! Bring them back! Bring them back! He was inconsolable.

Not again!

None of it seemed to matter anymore. He knew Percy could survive Tartarus, especially if Annabeth was with him. Nico just didn’t know who Percy would come out as at the other side.

Gaea didn’t want to give him time to dwell on it but he did so anyway.

He’d stay up late at night and watch the shadows dance against the walls as Coach Hedge walked up and down the hallway making sure everyone was in their own cabin. Not that Nico had anywhere else to go.

The last battle ran through his head like a movie. Some parts were marred by dizziness and fog because he hadn’t completely recovered from the asphyxiation in that moment but still, the outlines of the figures were clear. Percy was standing over him again. Percy was saving him again.

And all Nico could do was lay there trying to catch his breath.

The Death Trance had taken plenty out of him. The black clothes he wore seemed to slowly become one with him as he faded in and out of the shadows. It took his upmost control to not sink through the lumpy mattress he was sitting on in that moment.

He needed to be stronger.

He always needed to be stronger.

Bu there was no time. Every minute Percy (and Annabeth, he reminded himself) stayed in Tartarus was a minute longer they stood in hell. They needed a way out and Nico had to make it to the Doors of Death when they found it.

Nico would make sure that Percy and Annabeth survived their walk through the abyss. But it would be a whole lot easier with an army by his side…

Chasing the Sceptre of Diocletian brought Nico face to face with a demigod he thought he’d never see again. Jason Grace.

He looked different than Nico remembered.

His close cut hair had grown slightly, the glasses on his face (also new) seemed to be permanently askew. His strength hadn’t waned though. Jason still emanated an intense aura. Like that of a lightning storm coming to pass. Close, suffocating and inevitable. Still, he didn’t look so Roman anymore.

Nico had extended a challenge. Go with me to Diocletian’s Palace if you dare. And the son of Jupiter was never one to back down from a fight.

Maybe Jason had become a little more Greek than he’d like to admit.

‘I just can’t imagine how weird that must be, coming from another time.’

It almost made a shiver run down Nico’s spine. You have no idea.  

‘No, you can’t.’ He wanted to end the conversation there but sometimes you have to take one for the team. Jason wasn’t trying to be hostile or interrogative.

‘I don’t like talking about it… Honestly, I think Hazel has it worse. Me…’ a beat. Not just him. ‘Me and Bianca, we were stuck in the Lotus Hotel. Time passed so quickly. In a weird way, that made the transition easier.’

‘Percy told me about that place. Seventy years but it only felt like a month?’

A hitch in Nico’s stride and a darkness that seemed to fall over them.

‘Yeah. I’m sure Percy told you all about me.’

If Nico had known who he would meet in the Palace, he would have never entered in the first place. Let alone taken Jason with him.

What Favonius said wasn’t cruel but it may as well have been because it felt like a sword sharper than his stygian iron one was being pushed through Nico’s heart.

‘I knew eventually you would return to look upon my master’s face.’

What little blood Nico had left in his cheeks drained.

‘The one you care for most … plunged into Tartarus. Still, you will not allow the truth?’

Panic rose in Nico until he felt the gall all the way at the top of his throat. His heart rate quickened and the grip on his sword loosened as his hands became sweaty.

No.

‘We’ve come for Diocletian’s sceptre.’ He struggled to keep his voice level.

The words Hestia spoke to him years ago came back to haunt him.

‘Your trials will be much more difficult.’ Favonius looked amused. ‘If you want the sceptre, you must face the god of love.’

Favonius almost ripped Nico apart by taking him to see Eros. But the grass that wilted at his feet and the blackness of his shadow that snaked out wasn’t only due to unforeseen air travel.

‘I don’t blame you for being nervous, Nico di Angelo. Do you know how I ended up serving Cupid?’

A knot tightened in Nico’s stomach, for a second he regained his stature and stood. ‘I don’t serve anyone. Especially not Cupid.’

 What came next was anyone’s guess. Nico would have never thought that the god of love and the god of death were so intimately connected. But Cupid had been right, sometimes Death was kinder.

Blood ran down Nico’s sword arm, the red arrow lying at his feet dissolved with his wound. Nico’s fear was replaced by frustration.

He watched Jason get thrown around. First hitting the columns, then almost swallowed by a crumbling wall.

‘Stop it! It’s me you want. Leave him alone!’ He stretched out his arms as if standing in front of Jason and covering him would stop the god from attacking his friend.

Still, the taunting continued.

‘And you – what have you risked in my name?’

Anger burned in his stomach.

‘I have been to Tartarus and back,’ Nico snarled, his eyes icy. ‘You. Don’t. Scare. Me.’

For a second it seemed like Nico had found his fight again. ‘Give us Diocletian’s sceptre, we don’t have time for games.’

 An invisible hand rapped against Nico’s cheek. He went flying into a granite pedestal. Head cloudy and throbbing, Nico tried to sit up.

‘Tell him, Nico di Angelo. Tell him you are a coward, afraid of yourself and your feelings. Tell him the real reason you ran away from Camp Half-Blood and are always alone.’

Something inside Nico broke. His eyes were shaking and he lost control. He let loose a terrifying scream as he realized that there was nowhere left to hide. Nowhere that Cupid wouldn’t find him. The ground split open and bodies of passed soldiers clawed their way to the surface until they surrounded Nico.

The darkness rolled off of Nico in waves so powerful Jason almost couldn’t withstand it. Every pulse of energy that Nico released, seemingly unintentional, brought with it a wave of hatred, shame and fear.  

The images his power brought to the surface were ones he tried his best to supress. Percy’s smile, the clap on the shoulder he received after the Battle of New York, the way his stomach flipped when they were together.

To his horror, he realized Jason saw all the same things.

He looked over at the blonde in horror and urged his soldiers forward.

They grappled with the invisible god until he released a cruel, low laugh.

‘I wasn’t in love with Annabeth.’ Nico’s confession is hollow, his eyes downcast. He looks as if he has lost all his strength. The fight, the denial, it all left his body at once.

Nico crumbled to the ground with his soldiers and the darkness around him subsided. All that was left was a boy drowning in his own shame and misunderstanding.

Jason couldn’t believe how young Nico looked in that moment.

‘I hated myself.’ Nico confessed quietly. ‘I hated Percy Jackson.’  Because I loved him.

Cupid’s shape became clear, the white wings and black hair that belonged to the god were startlingly magnificent yet Jason couldn’t help but hate him. Love was cruel and Cupid was a monster.

‘Happy now?’ Nico demanded.

Cupid’s gaze changed, for a moment he seemed to almost pity Nico. ‘I wouldn’t say Love always makes you happy. But at least you’ve faced it now. That is the only way to conquer me.’

With the next gust of wind, the god dissolved and in his place was the sceptre of Diocletian.

It suddenly dawned on Jason that Nico’s story was not an ordinary one. He finally understood why Nico’s past weighed on him so much. To be born in the 1940s, during a time of war, a time where feelings such as Nico’s would have been shunned. It’s no wonder Nico battled so heavily with his secret.

The modern world that he lived in now, where acceptance was more wide spread than before, was not his home. Nico had always felt out of place. And the acceptance that the queer community got nowadays did not feel inclusive to the kid from World War II. 

‘Nico,’ Jason said gently, ‘I’ve seen a lot of brave things. But what you just did… that was maybe the bravest.’

Jason was unsure if Nico’s battle with Cupid had changed anything within the son of Hades but over the next days he saw Nico firm up. His once starved body became taut with muscles though his skin stayed as pale as ever.

And waiting in front of northern coast of Africa was making everyone antsy. Especially Nico.

‘Any word from the king?’

‘Every day, he calls for me later and later.’ Jason sounded frustrated.

‘We need to leave,’ Nico insisted. ‘Soon. Percy is close to the Doors.’

Jason had his doubts. The king of the South Wind was uncooperative, the ship was no where near ready and now with Leo gone…

‘I promised I’d lead you to the House of Hades,’ Nico said, his voice hard as if sensing Jason’s uncertainty. ‘One way or another, I will.’

‘You can’t shadow-travel with all of us.’ Jason had already considered that idea but it was worthless if Nico wouldn’t survive the trip.

Bringing up Nico’s inability somehow made the orb on the sceptre glow. Hanging on Nico’s belt it somehow seemed to throb.

‘Then you’ve got  to convince the king of the South Wind to help.’  Nico sounded angry. ‘I didn’t come all this, suffer so many humiliations…’ He trailed off but his intention was clear.

I did not suffer all these trials and forcefully out myself to you for you to NOT make it.

The dark energy that swirled around Nico and blackened the floor was unsettling. For the first time in his life, Jason thought this may be a foe he couldn’t defeat in battle. And he didn’t want to find out, if he was truly honest.

Jason wanted to be Nico’s friend but he wasn’t exactly making it easy.

The conversation shifted, for an uncertain amount of time it was always going to be about Nico’s coming out. Until he accepted his own feelings, that is.

‘It’s not like you’ve got a choice. It’s just who you are…’ Jason’s sympathetic voice sounded accusing to Nico.

‘Just who I am... What would you know about who I am? I didn’t choose any of this.’ He lashed out with his hands, swiping through the wind. ‘My father, my feelings.’

There was a pulse of energy.

But for some reason Jason began feeling just as frustrated as Nico.

‘I get it, what do I know. But Nico, you choose how to live your life. You want to trust somebody? Take the risk. Find out if I’m really your friend and if I’ll accept you. At least that’s better than hiding.’

The floor cracked, Nico’s eyes were cold and his aura seemed to be sucking in all the shadows from around him.

‘Hiding?’ It was barely a whisper.

Jason’s instincts told him to run, to grab his sword, to fight this threat. But he stood his ground.

‘Yes, hiding. You’ve run away from bot camps. You’re so afraid they’d reject you that you won’t even try!’ He pushed just a little further. ‘Maybe it’s time you came out of the shadows.’

Hestia’s words echoed in his mind.

And someday you must face your shadow. Beware, son of Hades.

 For one unbearable moment, Jason felt like his bones were being pulled towards the Underworld and then it passed. Nico dropped his eyes and the fissure in the floor closed. The ghostly light around the son of Hades faded.

‘I’ll honour my promise,’ Nico’s voice was barely a whisper. ‘I’ll take you to Epirus. I’ll help you close the Doors of Death. Then that’s it. I’m leaving.’

For a second Nico wonders if he and Jason were always mean to butt heads. After all, it was Zeus who had smited Maria di Angelo. How could Nico be sure that Jason was any different than his father? This olive branch was nothing but rotten.

 The journey to the House of Hades was nothing but unsettling, even for the children of the Underworld. Nico marvelled briefly at Hazel’s ability to crumble a house sized boulder into nothing before they continued their journey.

They reached the chalice filled with dark green liquid. Nico felt he was at a crossroads. Hecate was watching. Nico drank and offered it to Jason.

‘You asked me about trust. Well, here you go, son of Jupiter. How much do you trust me?’

Jason’s eyes glinted but he didn’t hesitate grabbing the cup from Nico. Jason drank never breaking eye contact as if to dare him. Next question. He all but threw the goblet at the others.

Nico hid his shock. An olive branch if he ever did see one.

The group continued downward.

A shudder made his way through Nico’s heart. He kept walking. It happened again. He saw Hazel pause too, ever so briefly. He briefly recounted the time. Twelve minutes. The Doors of Death were opening every twelve minutes.

Then Frank saw a ghost and the plan Nico had in his head went down the drain.

They were surrounded. On all sides.

‘Nico, the sceptre!’

He raised it and the dead with it. Not that it was much use though, Jason couldn’t command them and neither could Frank.

‘My rank,’ Frank realized. ‘I’m only a centurion.’

Nico carved through a gryphon with his stygian sword.

‘Well, then promote him!’ He shouted at Jason as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Jason didn’t hesitate.

‘Frank Zhang! I, Jason Grace, praetor of the Twelfth Legion Fulminata, give you my final order: I resign my post and give you emergency field promotion to praetor, with the full powers of that rank. Take command of this legion.’

Then, the battle changed and Nico couldn’t help but smile.

Watching Frank take control of the legion of undead soldiers had Nico thinking: maybe this guy wasn’t so bad after all. Maybe he could trust Frank with Hazel.

They won. Nico could barely believe it but they won.

A glimmer of hope ran through him.

Until, he staggered. His heart panged and he knew something changed.

‘The Doors,’ Nico said. ‘Something’s happening. We need to go now.’

Hazel and Leo were in full battle mode when they arrived. And Clytius was a terrible foe, even Nico had to admit. They attacked as a group. Even Annabeth and Percy had their weapons raised. Every time the giant attempted to tackle them with his dark smoke, Nico stood guard and absorbed the dark energy. For the first time in his life, he understood what it felt like to inhale and feel true air in his lungs. The substance Clytius released did nothing but agitate Nico’s hunger for darkness more.

Still, watching the giant burn to death had been awful but nevertheless, Nico felt a sick sense of relief.

There was hesitation in his step. Being so close to Percy after almost losing him. He couldn’t help but feel slightly paralyzed. He managed a ‘I’m glad you’re okay,’ and kissed Hazel’s forehead. ‘The ghosts were right,’ he said. ‘Only one of us made it to the Doors of Death. It was you, it was always supposed to be you. You would have made dad proud.’

She noticed his eyes were bloodshot and his face was wet with dried tears. Something had broken inside her brother recently and it was all flooding to the surface now. She wished so badly she could give him some peace of mind and some comfort. But she didn’t understand what was going on. And he wouldn’t tell her.

He got goose bumps as he realized Percy was standing behind him holding up Annabeth. Hazel suggested shadow-travel and Nico winced. ‘Hazel, I can barely manage that with only myself. With seven more people –’ I would die. He thinks.

I don’t want to die.

It’s an afterthought, the first time he had ever thought such a thing, but still it rang true.

‘I’ll help you.’ She’s insistent. And so he believes her.

The pain in Nico’s chest intensified as they sat in a circle and traded war stories. He watched Percy lace his fingers through Annabeth’s and felt like the loneliest person in the world.

Jason caught his eye, his gaze sympathetic. Nico couldn’t do anything but turn away in shame.

Later, when the commotion had passed and Nico was rigging up the statue, Percy found him.

‘Thank you.’

Nico stops. ‘What for?’

‘You promised to lead the others to the House of Hades, you kept your promise.’

Nico’s words are curt and guarded. They have Percy hesitating and rubbing the back of his head in discomfort.

‘Also…’ Percy said, ‘you visited Bob…You convinced Bob that I could be trusted, even though I never visited him. I never gave him a second thought. You probably saved our lives.’

Nico’s face darkens. ‘Yeah, well, not giving people a second thought. That can be danger.’

Confusion joins Percy’s discomfort. ‘Dude, I’m trying to say thank you.’

Nico’s laugh is humourless, there is something icy in his gaze. ‘I’m trying to say you don’t need to.’ You’ll never need to.

He made the one decision that made the most sense. The Athena Parthenos needs to go west, so he will take it there. Along with Reyna and Coach Hedge.

 -

The trip was hard.

Not as hard as surviving Tartarus but still, by all means, hard.

There was no comfort to be found on their journey. His gang slept in their tent on the outskirts of a road that seemed endless.

Maybe he would have felt warmed by the fact that Jason prayed to his dad every time he burned an offering. And that Hazel begged for his safe return. He plagued the thoughts of the Seven.

Reyna lent him her power in their moment of need which was good because he barely had any left. With every jump, he felt the darkness spread. It wasn’t like the darkness he had felt with Clytius, that darkness had strengthened him. This one tried to consume him. Until he was nothing left but shadow.

‘It’s not mind-reading,’ Reyna had said about her gift. ‘Not even an empathy link… just a temporary wave of exhaustion. Your pain washes over me.’ Hesitance. ‘I take some of your burden.

Shame and embarrassment washed over him.

‘You should rest,’ was the only thing she told him.

There was a lot of time spend unconscious for him. A lot of time for him to mull over the last few months. Sometimes he saw Akhylis, the Goddess of Misery, other times a vague picture of his father floated around his mind. Most often though, he was tethered down the thoughts of the Seven. He waned past all the usual painful memories and always landed back on his friends. Hazel’s face, Jason’s intense eyes, Frank’s look of determination.  

He had plenty of grief during his waking hours too though. He wished he could find some peace in his sleep.

The most peace he got was when Clovis dragged him off course and into Hypnos’s dreamscape. The detour was annoying but nonetheless helpful. He watched Will Solace, the lanky boy from the med-bay, diffuse a row between Clarisse and Rachel. The combat medic had something of Jason in him. Brave, loyal but the eyes were different. The eyes… bore right into your soul. Even in the dreamscape, Nico had to look away.

When he awoke he had no choice but to follow the burning man into his father’s chapel.

He felt his father’s presence before he saw him. Like a cold shadow that falls over you.

Nodding at the skull lined walls he asks his father dryly ‘Getting some redecorating ideas?’

‘I can never tell when you’re joking.’

‘Why are you here, Father?’

A pulse of embarrassment rushes through him as Hades mentions the sceptre of Diocletian and it’s… exploded state. It had been enough to rouse the god from his confused state. Still, that was not why he had come.

‘So tell me, Father. What do you want?’

‘Can you entertain the notion that I might be here to help you? Not simply because I want something?’

Nico suppresses a snort. ‘I can entertain the notion that you might be here for multiple reasons.’

It turns out Hades can be useful. He tells of Orion, the fallen archer who gave in to bitterness and anger after being scorned by love. ‘You can understand that.’ Hades had said to Nico.

What do you know about what I understand?

‘Still there is more,’ Hades said, ‘Your sister.’ He falters. ‘Your other sister. Hazel. She has discovered one of the Seven will die.’ Nico’s heart stops. It couldn’t be… ‘She may try to prevent this. In doing so, she may lose sight of her priorities.

Would Hazel be safe? Would Jason?

Nico barely notices that now, Percy is an afterthought.

‘Who will die?’

Hades’ eyes face the floor. ‘Even if I were certain, I could not say. I tell you this because you are my son. You know that some deaths cannot be prevented. Some deaths should not be prevented. When the time comes, you may need to act.’

Great, more responsibility.

A softness enters Hades’ face and his tone. ‘My son,’ he said, ‘whatever happens, you have earned my respect.’ Nico swallows hard. ‘You brought honour to our house when we stood together against Kronos in Manhattan. You risked my wrath and guided that Jackson boy to the River Styx.’ For a second Hades reverts back to his old self. ‘Never before have I been so harassed by one of my sons. Percy this and Percy that. I nearly blasted you to cinders.’

There’s a hollowness in Nico’s chest. That feels like a lifetime ago.

‘I didn’t do it for him,’ he insists. ‘I did it because the whole world was in danger.’

Hades allows his son this lie and gifts him the faintest of smiles. ‘I can entertain that you acted for multiple reasons.’

Nico can’t stop his eyes filling with tears. There was something under the surface there, something close to acceptance.

‘You and I rose to the aid of Olympus because you convinced me to let go of my anger,’ Hades reminded him. ‘I would encourage you to do the same.’ Sadness twinges his voice. ‘My children are so rarely happy. I… I would like to see you be an exception.’

‘My son, what you are attempting – shadow-travel across the world, carrying the statue of Athena – it may well destroy you.’ Nico thought he imagined the pain in his father’s voice. But there was nothing to be done about that.

‘I will see you again,’ Hades promised. ‘I will prepare a room for you at the palace. Perhaps your chambers would look good decorated with skulls of monks.’

‘Now I can’t tell if you’re joking.’

Hades’ eyes shimmered. ‘Then perhaps we are alike in some important ways.’

- 

Lycaon followed just as Hades had said he would. And Orion did too. Their escape led them to Old San Juan. It led Nico to realize that maybe Reyna was as lost and bitter as he was. The only memory left of that part of their trip was a Hawaiian shirt and the glowing figures of Reyna’s past.

‘I can’t,’ she pleaded, as if asking the spectres for forgiveness. ‘Please, I can’t.’

Nico raised his hand and stood in front of her. The ghosts dissipated but they both knew they would never truly be gone. He would shield her from this.

‘I don’t want to talk about San Juan.’ She said when they arrived at their next destination.

For the first time, Nico found himself giving out advice. ‘You should,’ he said, ‘That’s the thing about ghosts – most of them have lost their voices.’ He turns to her and shrugs. ‘In Asphodel, millions of them wander around aimlessly, trying to remember who they were. You know why they end up like that?’ She gave no answer. ‘Because in life they never took a stand one way or another. They never spoke out, so they were never heard.’

She takes in his words. And he does as well.  

‘Your voice is your identity,’ he continues, ‘without it… you’re halfway to Asphodel already.’

Damn, he needed to take his own advice.

‘I don’t like talking about it either,’ he said, looking into her eyes, ‘but sometimes, you have to.’

What Nico learned about Reyna that night thoroughly changed his opinion of the praetor. She was strong and resilient and came from such a broken home. Nico listened attentively, rarely commenting, only taking in.

In the end, the PTSD got to Reyna’s father and he became ‘a mania…’ Nico speculated. ‘I’ve seen it before. A human withering away until he’s not human anymore.’

It didn’t help. Tears filled Reyna’s eyes as she confessed her sins to Nico.

‘I killed my own father.’

He shook his head.

‘No. Reyna, no.’ Nico’s words were firm. ‘That wasn’t him. That was a ghost, a mania. What you did, you did out of self-defence. You were protecting your sister.’ And he would never blame her for that.

‘You don’t understand.’ But he did, she just didn’t know it. ‘Patricide is the worst crime a Roman can commit. It’s unforgivable.’

‘You didn’t kill your father.’ Nico insisted. ‘That man was already dead. All you did was dispel a ghost.’

Her tears awoke something in Nico. A protective instinct that usually only flared up around Hazel, and more recently Jason, came to the surface. He knew a little something about pretending to be strong and putting on a face for everyone around you. And then secretly crumbling away inside like a rock slowly being eroded.

If there were ever a moment when Nico would have imprinted on someone like a duckling, it would have been that moment.

And then, Bryce Lawrence decided to threaten his duckling.

‘I am a descendant of Orcus, the god of broken vows and eternal punishment. I’ve heard the screams of the Fields of Punishment first-hand.’ He stared at Nico crazed. ‘And they’re music to my ears.’

Nico was paralyzed as undead soldiers clawed their way up from a grave that he had thought previously was empty. It was the first time someone had used their own power of the Underworld against him.

The skeletons grabbed Reyna and only then did Nico regain his senses.

‘Nico, take the statue and go!’

He looked down at his hands. They were transparent and smoky. Had Bryce been right? Was he losing his grip, literally?

His energy was waning. Even standing in direct sunlight couldn’t hold his molecules together anymore.

His eyes met Reyna’s and a warmth spread through him.

She shared with him her strength and her drive.

Bryce laughed as if he were invincible. ‘I hope they’ll execute you in the ancient way.’ He nods at Reyna. ‘I’ve always wanted to see that. I can’t wait until your little secret comes out.’ He flicked his pilum across Reyna’s face. A trail of blood poured down.

A beat. Silence.

And then Nico exploded.

The air dropped to freezing temperatures and the grass on which they stood withered and died. With a single, glass-shattering cry the darkness poured out of him leaving every living creature to experience exactly what pain and anger were.  

Bryce had challenged Nico. And Nico would teach him.

You want secrets? HERE.

Bryce’s soldiers disintegrated into dust until all that was left was a shivering Roman falling over his own feet. Tortures of Tartarus and Akhlys, a suffocating bronze jar and modern world that didn’t make sense transmuted through the air.

Nico ripped the probation tablet from about Bryce’s neck. ‘You. Are not. Worthy of this.’

It took all his self-control not to hit Bryce across the face with it. Nico’s eyes were black and he didn’t blink as the rocks split and Bryce sank down to his waist.

‘You took an oath to the legion. You broke its rules. You inflicted pain. You killed you own centurion.’

They weren’t accusations. There was no defence. This was not going to be a fair trial.

‘You should have died for your crimes. That was the punishment.’ Nico cocked his head. ‘Instead, you got exile.’ The crazed look Bryce had carried was now mirrored on Nico’s face. ‘You should have stayed away. Your father may not approve of broken vows but I know another god who does not favour escaped punishment.’

The Underworld had no mercy. It only had justice.

‘Please!’ Bryce whimpered. But his beg fell on deaf ears.

‘You’re already dead.’

Bryce’s eyes widened in horror.

‘You’re a ghost with no tongue, no memory. You won’t share anyone’s secrets anymore.’

‘No!’ Bryce sunk deeper into the ground. ‘No! I’m Bryce Lawrence! I’m alive!’ He recounted it as if it were a mantra but his body turned dark and his skin became translucent.

Nico’s cold eyes gazed down at him.

‘Who are you?’

And Bryce couldn’t answer. Bryce was no longer alive. He would forever be a spirit with no voice. Just a nameless spectre amongst millions of others.

Nico swiped his hand through the ghost’s body. ‘Begone.’

And with that, he collapsed.

-

Three days.

That’s how much time they lost with Nico unconscious and his body barely a shadow.

He had been in a shadow coma. And it scared him.

Am I dying?

He expected them to recoil. To feel threatened and paralyzed by him after the show he had put on. He wanted to feel angry towards them for knowing they were judging him. But his anger wouldn’t materialize. He just felt… tired.

‘Why didn’t you leave me? You knew I couldn’t help you anymore. You wasted three days watching over me. Why?’

Reyna looked at him sympathetically. ‘I trust you, Nico. You lifted some of my burden. Your not the only one who lets out the darkness every once in a while. You shared your painful experiences; how could we not support you?’ Her face opened up. ‘We’re friends.’

‘Two days. The Romans will attack Camp Half-Blood in two days.’ Nico shook his head. ‘We have to hurry. I have to get ready.’ Even if it kills me. He realized.

But Coach Hedge relieved him of his burden.

Instead, they took to the sky with pegasi. And then they took a ride with Jules-Albert, Nico’s undead chauffeur.

He bid Reyna farewell with a grip on the arm.

‘It’s been an honour questing with you, son of Hades.’

‘You’re the most courageous demigod I’ve ever met, Reyna.’ The look in her eyes was almost too much. ‘I won’t let you down.’

Nico made it to the battle with two legionnaires and Jules-Albert at the wheel.

‘Leila, Dakota, Jules-Albert will drive you to the legion lines. Get out, talk to your troops, convince them to follow your lead. I need a distraction.’

‘I’m not hurting any of my fellow legionnaires.’

Nico supressed a growl. ‘No one is asking you. But if we don’t stop this war the entire legion will be wiped out.’ He looked at them, his orders clear. ‘I’m counting on you.’

They nodded at him.

‘I’m going dark,’ Nico said and faded into the shadows. 

- 

The second he jumped the shadows he began to dissolve. It wasn’t setting a great precedent for the battle. The voices called out to him Help us. Remember us. Join us.

He did his best to keep them at way and as he faced the sunlight, he answered. No! I am the son of Hades. I control the shadows. They do not control me. He rested his hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath.

A brief look at Octavian’s tent had Nico wondering if maybe an assassination might solve their current problem. He didn’t have time to test his theory though. Will Solace tapped him on the shoulder instead. Nico jumped and almost took his head off.

The son of Apollo muttered through clenched teeth. ‘Nico, what are you doing here?’

‘Me? What are you doing here? Getting yourselves killed?’

He surveyed Will and his two companions, dressed in black with matching face paint.

‘You’re dressed in black with the sun coming up. You painted your face but didn’t cover that mop of blonde hair. You may as well be waving a yellow flag.’ He scolded. Will’s ears turned red.

Nico inquired about Coach Hedge making it in time for his baby’s birth. The group nodded.

Will grabbed Nico’s hand unexpectedly ‘My hands are still shaking. See? But I delivered it. A very cute little satyr boy.’

Nico pulled his hands away, ignoring the electric current that ran through his body.

He was going to go back to his assassination plan until Will spouted some nonsense.

‘No more shadow-traveling. Doctor’s orders.’

Nico wanted to make a comment about how Will’s ‘doctor’s orders’ didn’t really mean much since he went into the OP with his a scrub shirt, khakis and flipflops but it didn’t seem like the right moment.

Not worth it.

‘Whatever. You follow my lead.’

Nico revised his impression of Will on their way to manipulating onagers. Talented, yes. Cool-headed, yes. Stubborn, double yes. Aggravating, unbelievably so.

In the next minutes Nico learned he could add reckless to that list too. Will, with the intention of creating a diversion, sprinted off and engaged six Romans at once. He needed an assist.  

‘Six at once, not bad.’ Will punched him in the shoulder.

‘Not bad?’ Nico asked blandly. ‘Next time I’ll just let them run you down, Solace.’

‘Ah, they’d never catch me.’ He shoots Nico a blinding smile.

They were moving towards to last onager when they were spotted.

‘Do we run?’ asked Lou Ellen quietly.

‘No,’ Nico said. ‘Let’s give them what they want.’

He raised his hands and called upon five skeletons. Watching the look on the Roman’s faces was almost worth his falling back and being caught by Will.

‘Idiot.’ Will held him up. ‘I told you no more.’

‘I’m fine.’

‘Shut up. You’re not.’

The spat with Will caused him to miss the entrance of the entire First Cohort. Octavian at the helm. His purple robes shone in the sun, jewellery glittering around his neck. On his head he wore a crown of laurels.

He watched Will let out a piercing taxicab whistle and suddenly Octavian didn’t seem so high and mighty anymore.

‘My – my elite guard!’ Octavian spluttered helplessly like a complaining child. The dog-men crumbled at his feet. ‘Did you see what he did to my elite guard?’

Regaining his posture, Octavian marched right up to Nico and to his credit he didn’t seem the slightest bit scared. Nico felt Will tighten his grip, staring Octavian down over Nico’s shoulder.

Up close Octavian looked sickly and bare. A descendant of Apollo but only evident in the shade of his hair. The arrogance and lust for power, that wasn’t a child of Apollo. Octavian was nothing but a watered down copy of Will Solace. Whatever it was that made a child of Apollo special, that made them glow the way Will did, Octavian didn’t have it.

‘Tell me son of Pluto,’ hissed the augur, ‘why are you helping them? What have they ever done for you?’

Nico’s hand itched to reach for his sword. He could do it now. Assassinate Octavian. He could probably even manage before the First Cohort intervened… it would be worth it.

Still, he hesitated.

If he committed this act of murder and died – he wouldn’t mind so much. For the good of the world and all that. But Will, Cecil and Lou Ellen… they would become casualties of his plan.

It wasn’t right.

Octavian intervened in Will and Nico’s quarrel. ‘What do you mean you’re leaving camp?!’ If they lived long enough, they would be able to hash out whether Nico should stay at camp or not.

‘I see ruthlessness in you,’ Octavian encouraged. He looked greedy. ‘And I appreciate that. Step aside and allow the Romans to win.’

‘Don’t do this, Octavian.’ Will shook his head. ‘Don’t force your people to choose. This is your last chance.’

There was sympathy in Will’s eyes. As if the gift of prophecy had been granted to him again, as if Apollo’s head had finally cleared.

The clearer Will’s eyes got, the more crazed Octavian’s seemed in comparison.

‘I will SAVE ROME!’ He explained. ‘Now, Romans, follow my orders! Destroy these Graecus scum!’

‘Don’t be stupid!’ Will yelled, his voice almost as loud as the second taxicab whistle he’d let ring to stop the Greek armies from waging against the Romans.

He pointed to the sky. Nico couldn’t believe his eyes.

Reyna was flying on Guido with six pegasi hauling the Athena Parthenos behind her.

Reyna’s voice boomed. ‘Greek demigods, Behold your most sacred statue. I return it to you now as a gesture of peace.’

An intense energy emanated from the statue all across the Greek camp. Everyone stood dazed. The statue seemed to be speaking out to each of them individually.

Nico felt his throat close as the voice whispered. ‘You are not alone. You are part of the Olympian family. The gods have not abandoned you.’

Reyna asked for the help of the demigods. Unite, please, so that we can all thrive.

‘Listen to her!’ Nico insisted, marching forward. ‘Reyna risked her life for all of you! We brought this statue half way across the world, Roman and Greek working together. We must join forces –’

And then Gaea woke. 

- 

When the battle started, it didn’t seem to end.

Nico found the Seven or well… Six (Leo was no where in sight) on the hill. Nico hadn’t felt his soul pass… still, there were too many casualties to be sure.

‘He’ll be fine.’ He met Jason’s eyes.

‘Sure.’ Jason sounded unconvinced.

‘But…just in case… For Leo.’

Jason nodded. ‘For Leo.’

Fighting with Jason was almost like a dance. It seems although they were made from separate cloth, their threads were very much intwined. They fought in harmony like they had been doing it all their lives.

And then Will Solace ran up to Nico. He said one word into Nico’s ear.

‘Octavian.’

On their way to the augur they felt the Earth shake. Festus snatched up Gaea and soared away with her. Stunned only for a moment, they continued on their way.

As they got closer, Nico saw Octavian furiously messing with an onager’s levers. He kept glancing up at Festus. It seemed his intention was to shoot the bronze dragon out of the sky.

‘Octavian!’ Nico yelled.

With a start, the augur turned, not noticing his flowing purple robe getting caught on the trigger. He looked crazed, hungry.

Will walked forward with his hands raised. ‘Octavian, get away from there. It isn’t safe.’ He spoke in calm, quiet words. As if psst-ing at a frightened kitten.

Nico nudged Will and looked at Jason soaring toward Festus with Piper in his arms.

‘If you fire the onager, you’ll kill Jason and Piper and –’

‘Good!’ Gods, it was hard to reason with him. ‘They’re traitors. All traitors!’

Will tried again. ‘Listen to me. This is not what Apollo would want. Besides, your robes –’

When Mike Kahl showed up, a bruised bump on his head, Nico thought he’d have to draw his sword. The soldier only surveyed the scene and looked at the Centurion.

‘Are you certain, Octavian?’

‘Yes!’

‘Are you absolutely certain?’

‘Octavian, don’t.’ Will pleaded.

He stepped forward only to be stopped by Nico’s hand. ‘Will, we can’t stop him.’

He saw the dread in Will’s eyes, the pain of causing another human being harm. But Hades had been right, some deaths cannot be prevented. And some…should not be prevented.

Octavian cut the release and disappeared into the sky. The flaming fireball landed in the middle of the storm and exploded.

He had achieved his goal. He had saved Rome.

The only sound that Nico registered was Will’s shark inhale.

Nico felt a new soul join the ranks of the Underworld and it wasn’t Octavian.

No.

- 

There was no time for rest and recovery. At least not for Nico.

He watched over the dead and honoured them with the proper funeral proceedings. So many casualties…

Many would be remembered as heroes. Even Octavian would have his place in the stories. But Leo was going to be the hero that no one forgot. The greatest sacrifice.

An oath to keep with a final breath.

Nico wondered who Leo had sworn to and if it was worth it.

They recounted the tales of bravery. Nico never thought he would see the day that Greeks and Romans sat around the campfire singing together. Even if it was a song of mourning.

Reyna stepped up and looked at the faces in front of her and thanked them. For their bravery, for their loyalty, for their loss.

‘We could have chosen hatred and war. Instead, we found acceptance and friendship.’

She turned to Nico with the warmest look he had ever seen and pulled him towards the flames of campfire.

‘We had one home,’ she said. ‘Now we have two.’

Nico didn’t notice but if he had, he would have seen Will’s approving gaze on the two of them. And even a little ways behind him stood Hestia. Disguised as a teenager, she looked out from under her headwrap and nodded. Your path has led you home, don’t you see?

Maybe staying wouldn’t be so bad after all…

- 

At midnight, still awake, Nico saw a blonde tiptoe. His heart jumped but settled when a framed face came into view.

‘Jason.’ Nico greeted.

Nico knew he came to ask about Leo. There was no comfort Nico could give him. They hung their heads together. Jason wanted to convince him to stay. The more he blabbered on, the more endearing he became. ‘I probably can’t change your mind about leaving but I have to try –’

Nico’s ‘I’m staying,’ had Jason blinking so hard that he had to shake his head to clear it.

The joy was so prevalent in his face that Nico even granted him a hug. Soon, Jason was off talking a mile a minute about sharing a table and teaming up and, and, and. The fact that it was midnight didn’t seem to wear on Jason’s enthusiasm.

There was a tiny sense of peace that settled in Nico’s heart.

A true friend.

So that’s what it felt like.

- 

Lucky.

That’s what Nico thought when Will ordered him to the Apollo cabin to rest.

Someone to look out for you. That’s what it seemed like.

In the midnight moon, Will’s hair seemed to shine brighter than usual.

‘I told you, no more Underworldly stuff, doctor’s orders. You owe me at least three days of rest in the infirmary.’

Will held up three fingers with an insistent look on his face.

Nico agreed self-consciously. Still trying to wrap his head around the fact that Will had asked where he had been. That he had been looking for him, that he had wanted to see Nico…

‘I hope you got over all that nonsense about leaving camp.’

Nico looks up with a start. ‘I – yeah. I did. I mean,’ he shrugs, ‘I’m staying.’

‘Good. So you may be dense but you’re not a complete idiot.’

Nico wants to threaten Will or say something back but he doesn’t get the chance.

‘You make yourself an outcast.’ Will told him. His tone would have been accusing if his demeanour hadn’t  changed. He looked tired now, worn. Like someone that had seen hardship and wished it away.  ‘How will people ever accept you if you don’t let them know you?’ It was the first time Nico had ever seen something resembling anger on Will’s face. His eyes were hard and his ears red.

A bout of confusion hit Nico. ‘Who would want to ever be around me?’ His voice is quiet, as if he were truly asking himself that question because he couldn’t comprehend it.

‘Me.’ This time Will’s eyes look open and honest. And a little hurt.

Nico felt reprimanded.

‘I don’t understand.’ Nico whispered, looking confused.

‘Then learn.’ Will insisted.

‘…okay.’

Will huffed as if a weight had been taken from his shoulders. ‘Okay.’

[riordanversetrash]

If you loved me back

They said he was heartless, and incapable of love. He trusted no one, made no eye contact and was always seen alone.

    What they didn’t know was the truth. The truth about Nico Di Angelo.

That he loved too fast, he fell too hard, for people he knew he couldn’t get.

  “People” here referring to Percy Jackson.

When he first saw his perfect green eyes,he started drowning. Nico was still young and confused. Coming from another century, he couldn’t accept his sexuality. 

      He couldn’t explain his attraction to this stupid, ridiculously loyal older boy.

There was something about him, the way he put his own life in danger from his friends, but there was something else too. 

   The way Percy forgave. No matter how many times he was betrayed by those he called his “friends”, he trusted them again, and helped them again. Nico didn’t think it was possible to forgive so easily, despite his fatal flaw.

   That was before Bianca died, and before he realised his own fatal flaw.

 Holding grudges.

It was a known fact that the children of Hades held grudges, and that made him more disappointed in himself. Because he couldn’t hold a grudge against Percy, no matter how hard he tried.

      Nico forced his sister’s death into his head just to try and hate Percy Jackson.

But it was hopeless. How could he possibly hold a grudge against a man who drowned himself in guilt and loyalty? Nico didn’t have to be a mind reader to tell that Percy still blamed himself for Bianca’s death after all these years. 

       Nico suddenly felt bad for distancing himself from Percy and making him believe that he was still angry with him. But he couldn’t risk falling in love again. 

           He worked so hard to hate Percy Jackson, but all that hard work went in vain as soon as he saw his face. Nico had long accepted the fact that Bianca chose her fate, but being around Percy just made it worse. 

   It reminded him about his past, back when Percy Jackson was his everything, and the only thing he was to Percy was a guy who hated his guts.

          Nico hated himself for loving him, and hating him.

If only Bianca was alive, she would’ve helped him. Helped him forget Percy, helped him move on. He could actually talk to her without her thinking he was a freak and a loner.

     Nico felt lonely, despite knowing that there were a lot of people who’d stand by him, even if he hated them. The most important of them was Percy Jackson himself, but he couldn’t get his feelings for him, off his chest to him.

All this time, even after he knew he wouldn’t be accepted for who he was, he still had a fleck of hope that Percy Jackson loved him back. The only reason he still maintained contact with camp was because he hoped that Percy would notice him.

  Even just thinking about it, he knew it was impossible, for multiple reasons.

One, because Percy thought Nico hated him, and being with Nico would drown him in guilt, just as it would drown Nico. 

Second, was Annabeth. Percy was in love with Annabeth, and Nico could tell that even before Percy himself realised it. You could tell by the way he looked at her, like she was his entire world.

 Even though Nico knew it was gonna happen, he still couldn’t bear to see them get together. It was obvious that their love was real, and he was proved right on multiple occasions. He wasn’t just jealous of Annabeth, but he was also disappointed in himself for so many things, he couldn’t even remember them all.  He was so desperate for just that one look of love, from the person he loved.

        And so he ran away from camp, from everyone. From him. 

He was afraid of people finding out he was gay. Afraid of being abandoned again. Afraid of love and hate.

 Time heals, and Nico knew it was true when he found love again, this time in a son of Apollo who loved him back.

He never really got over Percy, not completely at least. But he learned to accept it. And he didn’t regret loving him, for it taught him a lot of things.

         But sometimes Nico wondered how things would have been if Percy loved him back 

.

[gloomp3s]

ok literally no one asked but i was inspired by oliver’s post and i wrote nico’s confession to percy and how i would have liked it to go ^_^

It’s over, that was his first thought once he saw Octavian launch himself to his death. He should be happy, not about Octavian’s death, of course but, about this whole thing being over and done with. Instead, he doesn’t know how to feel.

This whole ordeal gave him time to avoid his feelings, to hide and maybe never show his face in front of Camp Half-Blood ever again instead, here he is. It’s a bit weird, four years ago he lost his sister and now he has a new one, maybe two, because Reyna feels like a big sister to him, what Bianca could have been, he tries not to dwell on it.

He made his way to camp, he had to stay for at least two days, he couldn’t just abandon Hazel. He sighed as he eyed his cabin, he really didn’t want to be here right now. He was almost at his door when he heard his name being called.

“Nico!” he turned around, ready to see Percy or Jason but to his surprise it was actually Travis Stoll, one of Hermes’ kids.

He stayed at the Hermes’ cabin for a while when his sister went on that quest, the Hermes’ kids had welcomed him as if he were one of them. It was the first time he ever felt like he belonged.

“Hi Travis” he replied and turned around to face him, he hadn’t changed much since he last saw him, maybe he was a little bit taller.

“How has our little brother been doing?” Out of nowhere Connor was now next to his brother, smiling at him.

“Um, fine” he replied, because he was not used to people coming up and talking to him.  

“You know,” Connor spoke “We thought after the war you’d stay but that wasn’t the case at all. Travis and I are still waiting for those poker classes”

Travis laughed and put an arm around his younger brother “Right, right. You beat our ass at poker, and you were only ten! You need to teach us your ways” They both smiled at him, waiting for an answer. He wasn’t sure on what to answer so he didn’t.

“Come on Nico” Connor pushed it and he felt himself get angry.

“Why would I stay here? No one acknowledges me, most campers are afraid of me and- “

“Woah, woah. Easy there lil bro” Travis interrupted him “Scared of you? Geez, most of us at the Hermes’ cabin have wanted to see you for a long time. When you came back you didn’t even greet us, we thought you forgot about us” Forget about them?

“Wait, this doesn’t make sense. Every time I came back everyone would just stay away from me”

“Well to be fair most of the times you came to visit the only campers are the Hermes’ cabin were Travis and I” Nico finally made eye contact with Connor “Not everyone is an all year rounder, you know”

“Oh” it hit him; people probably didn’t talk to him because he looked like he didn’t want to talk to anyone. He remembered how the Stoll brothers indulged him in playing mythomagic that one time and how they gave him a tour of the camp and taught him a few of their pranks. Maybe it was him who didn’t want to get close to anyone, he finally understood. He had to make an effort too, it couldn’t be one sided, he needed to stop viewing himself on how he thought people saw him, he was more than just Hades’ kid.

“So,” Connor spoke “Are we learning poker from our genius goth little brother?”

Nico felt himself smiling, maybe he could indulge them a little bit. “Maybe”

He spent the next two days at the Hermes’ cabin, he would have given Hazel a tour, but she was too busy roaming around camp with Piper and Reyna to pay any attention to him, he was okay with that. He taught the Stoll brothers all the poker knowledge he had learned from the Lotus Casino, which was a lot, spending around sixty years in a casino does that to you. They also made him play mythomagic and gave him a deck of cards so he could play with them whenever he wanted.

For the first time in a long time Nico felt happy. Reyna had spread the word that he had helped bring the Athena Parthenos to camp so now campers would say hi to him and hi-five him, which was a lot to get used to, but he realized he didn’t mind.

Hazel left that day in the afternoon, with Reyna and Frank. He said his goodbyes and promised to visit.

It was dawn and he didn’t sleep one bit; it didn’t bother him since he was used to it. He felt a knock on his door and got up to see who could possibly be, it was Jason.

“I came to check on you” was the first thing he said.

“I’m doing fine, thank you very much”

“That’s good”

“Do you regret now leaving with Reyna?” he asked

“Hm, maybe. I’ll be going back and forth between camps so I’m not too worried” Jason didn’t look too sure of his decision but he decided not to comment on it “What about you, it’s been three days and you are still here”

“Yeah, I’m staying”

Jason blinked, clearly surprised “What?”

“At Camp Half-Blood. The Hades cabin needs a head counsellor. Have you seen the decor? It’s disgusting. I’ll have to renovate. And someone needs to do the burial rites properly, since demigods insist on dying heroically”

“Dude, I’m pretty sure you chose the decor”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about” Jason laughed, and Nico thought it was going to be okay.

“Not to ruin the mood or anything but, are you going to tell him?”

“Uh?”

“Percy” He replied, “He’s leaving with Annabeth tomorrow”

He panicked, he felt his dinner on the back of his throat, he couldn’t breathe. Being with Travis and Connor had given him time to not think about Percy and now he had to.

He didn’t show up for breakfast and the Stoll brothers immediately sensed something was wrong, they visited him at his cabin. At first he didn’t want to open, he didn’t want to let anyone know how he was feeling but he gave in, knowing they would pester him until he opened the door. He tried to put on his best face but, Connor noticed something was wrong.

“Neeks, what’s wrong?”

How could he tell him? Hey, I’ve had a crush on this boy for four years and he’s leaving tomorrow, and I feel like I have to tell him, or I won’t have any closure.

“Travis bring some water Nico is clearly panicking”

He felt Connor pat him on the back, trying to calm him down, he can’t handle it.

He was being so sweet, and he felt like he didn’t deserve it, he liked a boy for fucks sake, how gross was that. He felt himself start tearing up.

“Hey Neeks, are you alright? What’s bothering you?”

“I like Percy” He didn’t process what he said until Connor stopped patting his back, he regretted it immediately.

“You do?” Connor asked “I mean he is really handsome and has saved the camp multiple times from being destroyed and he’s funny and” Connor realized what he was doing and stopped “I mean, it’s cool dude. I feel like everyone has had a crush on Percy at some point”

“What?”

“Yeah, I mean I had a crush on Percy for like two months”

Nico felt himself calm down a bit, at least Connor didn’t hate him or think he was disgusting for liking a boy.

“You did?” Connor laughed and looked at Nico

“Yeah,” he answered “is that why you’re panicking? Because you realized you like him?”

“No, I’ve known for a while” he felt himself blush, he had kept his crush on Percy a secret for a long time.

“Then what?”

“I feel like I have to tell him”

“Is that what you want?” For the first time since he met Connor, he saw him with a serious look on his face.

He wondered if it’s really what he wanted.

“I don’t know”

After his conversation with the Stolls he left for Camp Jupiter, he felt the urge to talk to his sister, he needed to tell her before he even wondered about telling Percy.

He arrived at night; he had sent an Iris Message to Hazel before visiting so that she wouldn’t be surprised.

“Nico!” she immediately hugged him.

“Hazel”

“It’s only been a day, what brings you here?”

“I have something important to tell you,” he spoke “Is there somewhere we can talk in private?”

And then he told her, everything, Hazel was the person he knew he would trust the most, so he didn’t hold back. He told her how disgusting he had felt when he realized his feelings weren’t platonic, how many times he had cried thinking people would find him disgusting and she just listened, she didn’t say anything until he was done talking.

“Do you plan on telling him?”

“I think so, he’s leaving tomorrow”

“You don’t have to, you know”

“I feel like I won’t be able to move on if I don’t” He looked at the sky, it was hard, he was scared.

“I think, you have to do whatever feels right for you, Nico”

He decided, he was going to tell Percy about his feelings. Hazel offered to come with him, and he accepted, he needed the moral support.

When he arrived at camp the Stoll brothers immediately found him and asked what he was going to do, he told them he was going to tell Percy, and they hugged him and promised to be there for him.

The next day he woke up and almost threw up because of the nerves, Hazel was next to him the whole time, telling him everything was going to be alright, he believed her.

Travis and Connor sat with him at breakfast even though it wasn’t allowed and tried to cheer him up, then, the time came.

He stood up and went to look for Percy.

“Percy, um, could I talk to you for a second?”

“Sure” He stood up from his place and followed him “What’s up?” He asked, looking at Hazel, Travis and Connor who were behind him.

“I like you”

There, he said it. He finally admitted his feelings to the person who they were for. He saw the shock on Percy’s face and almost laughed, he looked cute. He didn’t have to hide it anymore.

“W-what?”

Nico felt his cheeks grow red, “I like you” He repeated himself “I have liked you for a very long time and I thought I needed to tell you before you left”

“That’s uh”

“I don’t need an answer, Percy. I just wanted to tell you” He reassured him “No hard feelings”

“Yeah” Percy smiled “Thanks for telling me, Nico”

Acceptance wasn’t easy, he still had a long way to go, but he already took the first step.

[ohprettyweeper-fics]

The Last Bandito: Vulture Generation

Part Two: Statement of Purpose

Summary: As adjustments are made to the way life is now, some decide their next move. Warnings: Sickness, mentions of death.   Word Count: 1860 A/N: Book #2 of The Last Bandito series. Prompts are in bold; translations are from Google Translate.

Masterlist

Nico looked out over the district of Dema he presided over as the Heathens returned to their assigned quarters for the evening. They filed toward the buildings silently; one man looked up to the window where Nico was, paused and pursed his lips together, and then continued on his way. 

This man — who was no longer a man, really — had once looked at Nico with eyes that longed to be privy to every bit of truth and knowledge the Bishop held. Now, after the last invasion from the Bandito child and another nemesis they had yet to name, all of the Heathens looked at him differently. Respect and adoration had changed to tolerance and skepticism. 

“You are troubled, my lord.”

Nico turned away from the window. He had been aware of Keons’s presence before the other Bishop had even arrived to his quarters, but had been too lost in thought over the grouping of Heathens to acknowledge Keons before now. 

“They are losing their faith in us,” Nico stated. “This Bandito child coming here, taking away Heathens and humans alike — threatening the Bishops. She’s given them something new to have faith in.”

Keons did not look bothered. “They will return to us, as they always do. The older generations of Banditos filtered out, eventually. It takes time for them to see the truth, but what is time to us? Nothing.”

Nico pondered over the words for a full minute before shaking his head. “This feels different. Do you remember what you told the child’s mother the first time you visited her?”

“I told her that the child would be something new, something different. That was no great prophecy, Nico. A Heathen and a human had not before created a child together, and they haven’t since. We knew that whatever being was born from that woman, it would be a creature the world had not seen before.”

“Perhaps you were more correct than you understand,” Nico suggested. “She is something new. Something different. She threatens our way of life here. If we are to take over the new city, expand the old, then we must have the full faith and trust of every citizen of Dema — so long as she is doing what she has always done, that will not be the case.”

Keons stood a little straighter. He did not want to ask his next question, but he knew he must. “What would you have me do, pochesnyy?”

“Break her. They need to see her broken so we can gain the respect that we deserve.” 

* * * * * 

Tyler was beginning to worry about Ildri. After she went into her tent following the conversation on the ridge, she refused to come out for several days. Tyler brought her food, forced her to eat, and, eventually, slept on the ground next to her. He gave up his tent to a couple of newcomers who had almost nothing, save for the clothes on their back. He wanted to comfort Ildri, but he had to admit that he felt more comfort, too, being close to her. 

One morning, he woke up and Ildri was gone. He told himself not to panic; she was likely around camp, maybe washing up in a cold creek somewhere. The sun was barely visible over the horizon — in fact, some areas of camp were still mostly dim. Tyler rubbed the sleep from his eyes and wandered over to the big fire in the center of camp, warming his hands and his body by the flames. 

The group that had assigned themselves as the cooks of the camp were cleaning up from breakfast before Ildri came back over the north ridge. Her hair was fixed in intricate braids away from her face, with metal beads adorning her stitched locks. Yellow paint was smeared in two upward-pointing arrows under her left eye, with three small lines set over her nose. Yellow dots arched over her right eyebrow, and a thin yellow line divided her bottom lip. 

Tyler jogged to meet her halfway and gestured to her face and hair. “That’s new.”

“I had a dream last night,” Ildri started her explanation, “about the Banditos who used to live here. Generations before we were born. The women did their hair this way, some of them, and all of the ones who rescued escapees from Trench wore the face paint. They all stood at the top of ridge and looked down on a man in Trench, running from one of the Bishops. The Bishop caught up to him, but they made plans to go into Old Dema and get him — not through the front gate like Quinn and I did, but underground. They took him out of Dema and into Trench — Tyler, what if we did that? Some of them can escape on their own, but a lot of them can’t. That’s what I did for New Dema. If I can do it on my own, rescuing some here and there, why couldn’t we rescue more of them together? We gather a group of —”

“Wait, Ildri. Breathe.” Tyler put his hands on his shoulders, gripping gently. “I’m all for this, but you understand, if you start this, you will be the leader Josh said you already are. There will be no handing it off, no going back.”

Ildri took a deep breath. “I know that. And, I think, this is what I was made for. Not to be a victim of the Bishops, not to be a pawn of The Conference, but to do this. To give others a new beginning. I am the last Bandito, Tyler. Shouldn’t that mean something big?”

Tyler could feel the Heathen virus boiling in his blood at the thought of doing anything to go against the Bishops. He had known even when they were young that Ildri was going to do big things with her life; it was an unspoken truth, something understood but not talked about. Never, in either set of memories, did Tyler ever imagine he would be part of something like this — something life-changing, not only for them, but for so many others. 

* * * * *

Faylinn lay awake in her hotel room in New York, wondering at all the noise outside her twelfth floor window. Cars raced past at all hours, voices floated through the hallway at any given time, and the lights of the city were so bright, she often felt the sun never went down. 

She got up to pull the blackout curtains closed. The thick material didn’t block out the noise, but if she turned on the television set, maybe that would give her brain different noise to concentrate on. 

“Comedy,” she muttered, coming across reruns of an old sitcom she had loved as a child, “that’ll work.”

When the sound of the television did not help her sleep, Faylinn pulled the heavy, paper copy of her manuscript from the nightstand onto the bed beside her before opening the document on her laptop. The publisher was extremely interested in circulating her manuscript, but an editor had nearly torn the thing to pieces, marking it all up with suggestions in red ink — although the term ‘suggestion’ had been used lightly. 

Faylinn couldn’t help but feel her past hanging over her like a thundercloud as she worked through the recommended edits of her novel. As she read over the words she had written about Old Dema, her mind wandered back to the night she had followed Ildri and Quinn there, then watched them murder those innocent people. 

That was part of the reason she was still in New York. She could have easily gone home to do these edits, but it was so much easier to keep the distance between herself and what now felt like her old life. 

Then, a wave of realization hit her. “I don’t have to go back. I could stay here, forget everything about my life there. Only this novel would remind me. After all, I betrayed them all. What do I have to go back to?”

Her cousin’s words echoed in her mind then. When you realize who you are, then maybe you’ll understand. Ildri didn’t hold Faylinn to any fault, so why couldn’t Faylinn release herself from the guilt? Perhaps it was the way Josh had looked at her when she said she was coming to New York. Or the way Quinn wouldn’t even meet her eyes. 

“There’s nothing to go back to,” Faylinn spoke out loud, closing her laptop and pushing it, and the manuscript, to the foot of the bed. “So I won’t.”

* * * * *

The blood pressure cuff around her arm was tight — too tight, really — and gave Quinn the urge to tear it the monitor off and run far, far away. Her decision to stay in New Dema had been the safe decision; the one she had made after coming down from her bloodlust, unable to believe the carnage she had left behind her in Old Dema. 

And now, she was dying. New Dema’s best scientists were trying their best to come up with a cure for the Heathen virus, and it was Quinn’s only hope at the moment. 

The best anyone could surmise was that the Heathen virus was, essentially, not compatible with the dearg-due genes. The two strains were going after each other, and her tissues were caught in the crossfire. 

“Same as yesterday,” the nurse told Quinn, jotting down numbers on a notepad to later put into a computer. “Feeling the same?”

Quinn shrugged and nodded. “More or less. I think I slept a little more yesterday, but it may have just been the day.”

“Do all the resting you can,” the nurse encouraged, “your body needs it to recover.”

“If I recover.”

The nurse pressed her lips into a thin line. “You know, you’re the first non-Heathen patient here. They brought you down from The Conference, and I couldn’t believe that you had the virus — your eyes weren’t red and you weren’t hungry for blood or anything.”

Quinn whispered, “Not at the time.”

The nurse forced Quinn to look at her. “My point is, Quinn, you are different. Not everyone goes into Old Dema and comes back out, for starters, but the virus hasn’t become who you are. You can fight it. You have to fight it.”

Quinn looked at the other woman with tears in her eyes and hurt in her voice. “How do I fight death? Do you understand, that’s what’s what I’m doing here? I came here to stay in the place that’s become my home, and found out I’m dying. I’ve accepted it, and you should, too.”

The nurse stood from the bed, tucked the note with Quinn’s vitals into her pocket and gave a single nod. “Well, if that’s the way you feel about it, then I won’t bother.”

The lump in Quinn’s throat as the nurse left the room was nearly suffocating. She hadn’t truly accepted that she was dying, not yet. There was still that last, frayed strand of hope she was clinging to, hoping and praying that the scientists would soon find a cure for the Heathen virus and save her life. 

* * * * * * * * * *

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