#No and you're so fucking mean to me you're horrible you're fucking abusive you're controlling you're -

[blackvahana]

christ it hits me a lot how shit I was treated by lull and how much I thought that was normal. Lev set up a study room in my house, and... he said I can come in because I was sort of obviously asking the question without even knowing I was asking, like I wanted to ask the question but knew it'd be a no. Why did I know itd be a no? Well a study space is a serious space for actual academic and general people who do work to use, full of books and journals that both aren't my business and will be easily messed up if I touch them, and there's no reason for me to be in there anyway because I don't do work, a study is only a space for normal people and not people who mess everything up and - how do i know this? Oh I mean because lull - yeah

[genderqueerdykes]

hey anon saying "my abuser was a trans man so trans men hate trans women" I just want you to know I'm a transmasc person who was literally abused horrifically on the basis of sharing a similar pronoun and gender identity to my then-girlfriend's ex. she used the abuse of an entirely unrelated person as an excuse to insinuate I never respected her and would regularly scream at me and even invalidated my trauma over a relative dying using her own trauma.

she also, unsurprisingly, was a rampant transandrophobe, calling me horrible and transmisogynistic because I challenged her as a trans woman over saying blatantly transphobic things about trans men and transmascs (myself included).

because it was never about truth, it was about being on top and being the most inconvenienced and being in control of the conversation of suffering (this went beyond us fighting over my gender).

think why you feel that way, that you need sole dictation over the conversation and can't let anyone else breathe their words about experiences that may challenge how you feel, anon

if I were to do what she did, and say I was uncomfortable with trans women because they can be abusive, I would rightfully be ripped limb from limb for the transmisogynistic notion that trans women are remotely a monolith or are abusive based solely on my experience

but I guess trans men aren't owed that same equivalence. they are forced to live a double standard there. because you don't respect us enough for it. why is that.

"because it was never about truth, it was about being on top and being the most inconvenienced and being in control of the conversation of suffering,"

"if I were to do what she did, and say I was uncomfortable with trans women because they can be abusive, I would rightfully be ripped limb from limb for the transmisogynistic notion that trans women are remotely a monolith or are abusive based solely on my experience"

i had to highlight these bits in particulare because good god you worded this so perfectly. i am so sorry you have had this experience but you knocked the ball so far out of the park that i am genuinely in awe of how well you conveyed this, and how absolutely fucked peoples' double standards are when it comes to abuse and how people think that trans men and mascs have it "so much easier in life". you're dead on the money. NONE of this has to do with talking about oppression and looking out for one another.

this behavior is about control.

it's about controlling the narrative. some people literally get so insecure when the conversation turns away from them for even a moment, they think it means that everyone is their enemy. yes, trans women have an absolutely awful time in cisheternormative society. so do trans men.

i have been emotionally and sexually abused and harassed by 3 separate trans women. one of which struck me with an object, another who stole something out of my purse while i was asleep and continuously kept trying to get in my pants after she found out i had a vagina despite me repeatedly turning her down, and another who mocked me for my psychotic episodes and repeatedly swore up and down that i didn't have DID and just in general gaslit and emotionally abused the fuck out of me. the woman who hit me also constantly kept insinuating that penises are what make a man a man, and would not stop making me feel bad for not having a biopenis.

once everyone found out i had a vag, suddenly, i was a cishet woman in their house and i was public enemy #1. i had to deal with my cis gay male roommate shrieking about how he's gay, boobs and vaginas are disgusting, he's a MAN attracted to MEN. meanwhile, my ex girlfriend (the one who hit me) made me feel like shit for being a man without a penis almost every single day. she would guilt trip me about how she missed being with partners with biopenises and would spend all day telling me that she loved me, but then would turn around and scream and yell at me and tell me that i'm an evil asshole.

the transandrophobia i have had to deal with at the hands of other trans women has been absolutely fucking staggering. we need to stop fostering a culture where this is okay because it's genuinely getting people hurt. like you said, if a transmasc were to say "i hate trans women, they're all mean and shitty and abusive," they would literally be torn limb from fucking limb. and rightfully so, because it's a dogshit thing to say. but we HAVE to start telling people who do this to trans men to fuck OFF and stop it.

i am very sorry you went through that. i hope things improve for you, and that you're able to spend time in company that treats you with respect. nobody should have to deal with literal profiling just because of their gender.

is that what we're doing now? profiling people based off of their gender? how is that progressive? how is that liberating? how is that trans rights? it ain't.

[baby-tini]

What kind of doms are all mikey timelines?

TW- Abuse in Kanto!Mikeys part.

I am not the most knowledgeable when it comes to the BDSM community, so if there is any misinformation or harmful content please let me know, so that I can fix it.

Toman!Mikey- Daddy Dom. He's both strict and playful, the perfect balance of a dom. He's also very heavy on aftercare and he makes sure that you're well taken care of, even if he's horribly tired. Because, he prioritizes you above everything and anyone else. He definitely feels like the type too let you just play with his hair as he sits in meetings with his legs spread as he barley listens to his, already, anxious lackeys that are trying so hard too not fuck up and receive a round in their skull, especially in front of you. While he does have rules with the high expectations that you follow them to a T, you usually have a lot of freedom and can do as you please, as longs you're not getting into trouble, because depending on what you did, the punishment will not be too nice for you... or your ass.

Manila!Mikey- Brat Taming Dom. I've stated this already here, but I'll happily dive into it a bit more. Manila!Mikey gets a sick kick out of your disobedience, it's not the act in it's self, but more of what it always leads to, which is punishment. He'll let you do as you please, just watching you as he sits on the couch as you stomp your foot on the floor, with a loud whine for whatever it is that you're wanting in that very moment. His face blank as his eyes stay locked on you before his arm lurches forward and he has your shirt in a tight grip as you quickly stumble forward into his lap before he puts you on the floor, on your knees, looking up at him as he pulls your head back, his hand tugging at the roots. His other hand squeezed tightly around your jaw as he tilts his head to the side. The look in his obsidian eyes empty as he stares you down, your lips sealed as you hold your breath, your eyes deer-wide as you wait for him too do something.

Kanto!Mikey- Sadistic Dom. Now, it's no big surprise that this version of Mikey is mean and harsh, he makes it very obvious that he is too be respected and never questioned and that's what you do. Because you know Kanto!Mikey can fly off the handle within seconds, being a relationship is like walking on eggshells and you have too be very cautious with every question you ask and everything you do because it's heavily monitored by him or his lackeys. He thrives off the fearful look in your eyes, because that's what his whole gang is gang is based on, the fear of Mikey and he knows that. Fear is still respect at the end of the day, and as soon as you see him walking to you, his composure calm but you know that it's the farthest thing from good and the consequences will be dire as you feel his hand grab you up by your hair and drag you away, some of the strands being tugged out.

Bonten!Mikey- Hard Dom. I think this version of Mikey would thrive in a dynamic like this, simply because control is a very big thing for Mikey and he expects complete obedience and he's not too happy when you display behaviors that are against that, in any way really. While you know he's in control, he also enacts this control in less obvious ways as well, such as, choosing your clothes, deciding how you get your nails done and even how you style your hair that day. Your days are very scheduled, not fully packed, he does let you have some down time and relax, he's not always hounding over you, you have time for your own activities, but he does control a large part of your day. He, just like Kanto!Mikey and Toman!Mikey, has rules for you, but his rules are more day-to-day based instead of in general, especially with how all over the place his schedule can be, so he just accommodates your rules for that day based on himself.

Street Racer!Mikey- Pleasure Dom. He is very giving and fully focuses on satisfying you before he even lets you think about touching him. The foreplay with him is long and welcoming as he drawls out your pleasure and makes you cum for him over and over again, leaving your head all cloudy as he has youm laid on your back and spread for him, but it's not an uncomfortable vulnerability with him, it's very welcoming. He makes you want too be vulnerable with him because it's a scarce kind of trust that people rarely feel, but with Mikey, it's so easy too let him do everything for you, for you too let him make you feel good because he always makes it worth every second of it. He's so intuned with you during these intimate moments as well, always checking with you, not for every little thing because he knows the tiniest of twitches in your muscles when you need a break or are, quite often, insatiable. He makes sure that he pays close attention, but he does expect you too verbalize what you want or need, sometimes too be a tease but more often, your verbal reassurance.

[stolasdearest]

I saw that you didn't have any ideas for the 3rd prompt so maybeeee the moment Alastor makes a deal with the reader and he's all like "jeje all this power for the small price of my soul" and then the readers like "nu-uh that's not a small price actually, I'm gonna treat you horribly" and then it dawns on him that he literally sold his soul. :P

Or after the fight with Adam the reader like goes to rub it in Alastors face by helping him patch up and stuff after hearing him sing about him trying to find a way to get out of their deal.

Also manic Alastor giggles 💕✨💖

Whichever you want if you want, don't want you to feel pressured or stressed!

Also I am loving the Rosie and Alastor fics you've been writing they are amazing! 💖 You are definitely my fav hazbin writer ✨✨

As always, drink water and eat a snack!

✨ anon

Alastor x Overlord!Reader˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥

ׂׂૢ pairing : Alastor x Reader

ׂׂૢ cw: Not proofread, abuse of power, Reader being mean (in a loving (not really) way)

ׂׂૢ reader is gender neutral

𝐍𝐨𝐰 𝐥𝐨𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠. . .

While quietly walking among the broken remains of the hotel your eyes scanned every piece of debris watching the dust settle from the violent, bloody fight you witnessed; stepping in Yellow glowing blood you paid no mind before your eyes slowly trailed to the trail of red blood; back to a very familiar spot that you knew all too well, with a shrug of your shoulders and a deep breath you, you made your way to the tower; the blood of your dearest soul sticking to the sole of your shoe.

Arriving at the shattered and battered radio tower, you easily hoisted yourself up into it; not making the slightest effort at keeping your presence unknown to Alastor who was hunched over his control panel; rigid, shallow fast breaths while his chest heaved; you smugly watched his ears flatten further upon his realization of who had found him, his gaze shifting to meet yours after a few seconds his body too, turning to you; revealing that nasty gash on his chest his eyes seemed heavy, his smile strained; wince and pained expressions contorting as you tutted at the Overlord while walking up to him; gently undoing the layers to get to the gash, his hand raised; hesitating to stop you his hand quickly retreating back to the control panel with one sharp glare from you.

"you should be more careful. Look at you, I thought I didn't need to see you this truly pathetic again"

Your words cut through him as his eyes averted every inch of you; shame, embarrassment and humiliation washing over his weakened body before he leaned more into the control panel, his sharp nails digging further into the metal surface at the next venom laced words coming out your mouth

"oh. So because you're hurt means you no longer answer me, Alastor?"

"no,no you're right I'm sorry, I should've been more careful"

The sweat dripping from his forehead while one of his eyes lingered on you watching you meticulously work on his fresh wound, your face didn't match your hands gentleness however; your eyes filled with annoyance and hints of just pure anger; you had better things to do then take care of his pathetic self; he had felt your tug when he was hit, essentially further convincing him to get the fuck out of there; the second he was away he knew he'd never hear the end of it from you; and now his flattened ears are listening those very said words.

"I thought you were a powerful overlord, you honestly thought this would've been a good idea? It seemed I underestimated you"

Every new word, every new insult and comment made him wince again and again while glancing at you looking for perhaps a sign you'd soon let up with your entourage of sickly words, not helped by the sly smug smirk very abhorrent smirk on your face, Alastors eyes met yours; seeing a glint in your orbs, God how he hated being infront of you it always felt so overwhelmingly humiliation under your precise watch.

"you can be glad I saved you last minute, honestly why do I need to save you every time, The leader of the exorcists; did you think he'd be an easy fight? Or did you go into that fight wanting to embarrass me?"

The silence in the broken radio tower was thick and deafening, Alastor shallowed the lump in his throat and opened his mouth, trying to look at you, looking for even the slightest bit of worry in your eyes, trying to find even a sliver of you that actually cares about him, quickly snapping back when he felt a rough hand grab his jaw and pulling to kneel over while his body tensed at the pain shooting through his body

"answer me, before you lose that tongue of yours."

His breathing quickened and his clawed hand gently came to hold your wrist, seeing him fighting to regain his composure.

"i— I don't know what I was thinking, that was stupid of me..I apologize"

"hm. So you can listen. Pull yourself together"

You let go of his jaw, clearing your throat and stepping away from him; turning your back to the Overlord and leaving through the hatch you come through; leaving Alastor stood there with a gentler hand replacing the one you had, the other one hovering over the cleaned and patched up wound.

Author's note : man...I GOT A LIL LAZY AT THR END....I KINDA HATE THISSS

Taglist : @k1y0yo @ihavetoomanyfictionalcrushes @d0nutsaur @anni1600

[firesnap]

i have a genuine question. i promise i am not at all trying to defend him. ive dropped him entirely, literally deleted everything i had of him and unliked his songs.

ive just been wondering like considering that he has been in therapy, and also considering how if he does take a year off and then comes back, why cant it be redeemable? like cant people change? cant we give them second chances? he is 27. is he just doomed to be an abuser forever?

its just scary and im asking as like a younger person who is in my very early 20s. i know ive made mistakes. i know ive not been a good partner or friend sometimes. (and yes i was also abusive to a past partner...im not proud of it and ive learned from it. i have never ever touched anyone in that way after that. it took awhile but my current relationship isnt toxic and i would never hurt anyone or hit them again yknow?) and it scares me that people keep insinuating that he is irredeemable. like cant abusers change and become better? dont they get second chances? if shelby has grown and healed in 10 months wouldn't it be fair to say the same for wilbur?

im just genuinely asking because based on everything i believe you are older than me and im looking for guidance and just...idk im scared. growing up on the internet has made me so scared of making mistakes and doing anything wrong because when it happens to others i look up to, its always treated as something they'll never be able to change or improve. makes me feel like imma just be a horrible person forever because i made mistakes in the past.

This is a really complicated question that multiple answers can validly fit.

I don't think, personally, that anyone is irredeemable. I think everyone is on a journey of forgiveness and some of us may need more grace than others.

This is tw// abuse even more than the current topic, but my mom was incredibly abusive. We lived in a very rural area and she had a lot of undiagnosed problems and trauma of her own that created a pressure pot of issues. After I was born, she suffered through full on post-partum psychosis that nearly ended about as well as that sentence implies it could have. She was incredibly violent, controlling, and cruel for years. My sister went no-contact with her the second she turned 18. A significant event occurred that eventually spurned her into seeking real treatment that lasted for years. It's still ongoing.

My sister is also still no contact and I support her decision 100%. Those are her wounds and what she needed to do to get peace should be respected. I decided I wanted a relationship with the person who came out of all that work and, even then, it's been hard. I don't know if she's redeemed herself, and my god do we still have bumps in the road, but I support her for trying.

With Wilbur, how he responds to this is going to really impact a lot of things. I mean, I know no matter how he responds I won't be going on whatever journey of redemption and healing he has to go through. I'm tired and I feel hurt enough. I would think, if he wanted to show he was sincere, admitting what happened would be a great sense of closure for a lot of people who put time and energy and faith into this guy for years.

Not every person that causes harm is inherently evil, but there has to be some kind of knowledge that you're aware of the harm you've caused. No one is stuck as anything forever, life is constantly moving, and most people aren't saying his life is just over. You can work on yourself. You can change. And I'm saying that specifically to you, anonymous.

(Saying this, actually, there ARE people who would argue once you've done x you're beyond redemption based entirely on their life experiences as a victim, personal histories and many other factors. Kinda like my sister, that's their choice. And you have to accept that sometimes you fuck up so badly that you will permanently lose some people from your life. But your life isn't over.)

But I do think, regardless of what he says or does about this, his time of controlling a large platform is at an end. He can still do a lot of things in his life after he works on himself -- editing, song producing, directing, writing or whatever -- but being in charge of a large impressionable audience that could enable more destructive behaviors is just not it.

[prismatoxic]

I am too tired and too depressed to deal with it right now, but sometimes it drives me absolutely insane how people perceive the purity culture debate in fandom.

it's nice that it's not a big deal for you. it's nice that it just looks like petty squabbling to you. I'm glad you get to worry about "real" problems instead.

but I was harassed for multiple years by people who doxxed me, tried to call the cops on me, systematically ostracized me from the only social groups I had, and ultimately left me with a tremendous amount of trauma--and this was because of the fiction I consumed and supported.

I've known people whose lives were ruined. and I mean RUINED. I mean jobs lost, relationships severed, complete mental breaks from prolonged persecution. over fiction.

on top of it all, the freedom to depict anything in fiction is important to me, and I'd be on the side of that whether all the trauma had happened or not. but listen to me. I need you to understand that this isn't just ship wars, that no matter how insignificant the root issue of what people find acceptable in fandom seems to you, that you're not seeing the full picture.

people love an easy enemy. they love a valid target. it's so easy to moralize your discomfort to the point that you see people who make you uncomfortable as subhuman. do they really believe art can be equivalent to real life abuse? sometimes. but plenty of the time it's just a handy justification to be the boot on someone else's throat.

do you understand how damaging it is to be chased out of every community you care about, and every one you try to join after? do you know how terrifying it is to see your personal information in someone else's hands, to know they think you deserve the worst, to fear SWATing or accusatory calls to your employer or landlord or what the fuck ever? do you know how exhausting it is to fear every new relationship you make, every new community you join, worried that if their stances on fiction don't align with yours it might happen all over again? do you know how much it hurts to be called all sorts of monstrous things, things people BELIEVE about you, because of the fucking fanfic you wrote?

I get it, internet battles over fiction seem ridiculous. please look at the bigger picture. it's fascist controlling of the art other people can make, and it's a handy excuse to enact horrible abuse on people who ~clearly~ deserve it. do not belittle victims of these things just because it's all online, it doesn't seem like a threat to you, it seems pointless.

and it probably goes without saying that if you think anyone deserves any of that for the fiction they create or consume, get the fuck away from me.

[la-pheacienne]

Alright I'm choosing violence yet again because that's what we do in this house.

You guys are seriously creepy about adultery. Like. Seriously. It's not even a joke. In the beginning I thought this bizarre attitude was limited to fandom discourse but I don't think that's the case anymore. I think you guys will eventually need to come to terms with the fact that :

1) Adultery is not criminal behavior, at least in the Western world, since... quite a while actually.

2) Married people can and do fall in love with other people and even occasionally fuck them and this is a very real part of human experience that you need to eventually face.

3) Women who cheat on their husbands are not actually whores.

4) Being "the other woman" (funny phrase) does not automatically give you the seal of ultimate shame, depravity and ruined vagina unlike what your grandma may have told you.

5) Nobody is actually going to give you a golden cookie if you're a faithful god-fearing woman in your own marriage.

6) The fidelity of a man is not and should not be a reward for being a "good"/"correct" woman and having a faithful husband is not the Ultimate Badge of a Woman's Worth and Value unlike popular belief.

7) Likewise, having a man cheat on you does not make you Unworthy, Pathetic and Forever Ruined, it just means they wanted to fuck someone else. A man is not and should not be responsible for your value or worth, not even your husband.

8) From the list of all the harmful things a man can inflict on a woman, cheating is actually the least harmful. It is somehow rebranded as the most harmful, for obvious reasons patriarchy, which leads us to the centuries old pervasive mentality of "he's x, y and z (enter abusive, controlling, boring, horrible in bed) but AT LEAST he LOVES ME he's fAiThFuL and has eyes onLY for ME isn't that rOMaNTIC??". No, it is not. A man can cheat on you after years of being a supportive partner, giving you the best sex of your life, being a great parent for your kids, in short, after years of making your life better in all the ways that matter. A man can be blindly faithful to you and also be a horrible lover and a boring, controlling or abusive partner. Fidelity is socially treated as the number 1 undisputed proof of a man's love for a woman and number 1 undisputed proof of his value as a partner and it absolutely should not be so. This is actually a dangerous mentality and you learned it from me today.

9) Marriage vows are not engraved on our skin, they are not the unbreakable vows of harry potter where if you break them you lose your life, they are not the 10th commandments, they are not the vows of the night's watch. Marriage vows are nothing more than an legal agreement between two people and the state, and agreements are sometimes breached. People's genitals are not automatically covered with sealed concrete when they sign the paper, as much as it would like it to be so. People may agree on fidelity for life but they do preserve their bodily and sexual autonomy and free will even after marriage and sometimes they do prioritize that over their agreement because humans are just like that. I get that this very simple fact sucks, I do. But life sometimes sucks, relationships are unpredictable, people change their minds and can't/don't always want to resist on their desires or needs, and things don't always go as planned because as a general rule, you can't control other people's choices. Only your own.

10) Cheating is a morally reprehensible act, but that doesn't necessarily mean that people who cheat are inherently the epitomy of moral depravity or that their faithful partner is the saint in the relationship. Maybe they are, maybe they're not. Maybe they are both problematic, maybe the cheater is the victim, maybe the faithful partner is actually the problem. It fucking depends. In the year of our lord 2024 you need to perhaps acknowledge that this obsession with fidelity in marriage as the Absolute Hallmark of a healthy relationship and the Ultimate Seal of moral purity is actually a by-product of harmful strict patriarchal/religious values, real life is less black and white and the world is not split between faithful partners with a halo over their head and filthy cheating partners that should be lynched. This is bordering on biological essentialism and let's just say that's not the vibe.

11) A big part of the disgust "cheaters" inspire to a certain category of people is simply thinly concealed sex-averse puritanism, rebranded as ethics. Not all of us fall for that.

12) Feeling hurt, betrayed, traumatized, furious or disgusted after being cheated on is a totally valid reaction. Feeling outraged or disgusted on behalf of other people being cheated on isn't a valid reaction. The scarlet letter was published almost two centuries ago. You are still wayy too comfortable talking about other people's sex lives and passing judgment on account of what they are doing with their own genitals. Likewise, you do not have a say on the cheatee's choice to stay in the marriage. Some people do stay in marriages where they have been cheated on, and no, they are not necessarily weak people with no backbone and/or victims and/or financially dependent on their partner and they don't necessarily need saving. A marriage is an agreement between two (2) people and they are free to agree on whatever the fuck they want. You don't know everything that's going on between them.

The sooner you accept the above facts the easier human relationships will be for you, and as a minor but useful side-effect, navigating certain fandom spaces may become less tedious for you and me both. it's a win-win situation.

[daily-dose-of-imagines]

Flinch

@jade-flower-stories asked: Sorry I it Connelly slipped my mind but the abused reader one. Where they accidently raised their voice/hit her. And thbak you so much this means a lot to me. ♡

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Hello and thank you for requesting with us! I am so sorry this took solong to get out, I do hope you enjoy these hcs! If you want to read the other abused hcs for Nishi and Kuroo, Click here!

Tags and warnings: Mild ptsd, outburts, mentions of past abuse

>Admin T

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Tsukishima --

He was exceptionally irritated that day and wanted nothing to do with anybody, even you.

Unfortunately, you didn't notice his attitude, you were too excited to see him first thing.

His headphones were on, so he didn't notice you calling out to him, no matter how often you did.

That's when you decided to play a little prank and take his headphones off, and keep them from him.

Only, it didn't end so well.

Right as you grab the headphones, ripping them off his head, Tsukishima - with gritted teeth - took them back and growled, "god why are you so fucking annoying all the time?"

You were instnatly pulled back into your childhood of your mother saying those exact words to you, everyday of you young life.

Instantly, tears started to flow, and Tsukishima was surprised at you, and himself.

"No, I'm- it-"

He didn't know how to properly apologize, never been in this situation before.

So, if words couldn't come out, he decided actions will do.

He hugged tightly, and stroked the top of your head. Once you had settled down, he muttered into your hair, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean it, I'm sorry."

He didn't excuse himself, but he did apologize profusely, and for that, you were gratefu.

Oikawa --

He was talking to other girls again. and you knew he was just a natural flirt, and that the conversations never evolve into anything, since he was dating you.

But you couldn't help but be jealous, the tainted feeling clawing up your throat, making you want to scream. He was too close to her, she was touching him too much.

You couldn't handle it anymore, and walked up to the both of them, stealing him away from the stranger.

"What the hell you are you doing?!" he yelled, slapping your hand away from his. You experience you anger, and he scoffs.

"You always do this, you always flirt with other--"

"Would you stop being a jealous bitch for two seconds!" he yelled, but instantly regretting it.

You were shaking from head to toe, tears building up in your eyes as you stared him down, memories of your past flashing your mind.

Memories Oikawa knew of, which made it all the more horrible.

Oikawa sighed, raking his hand through his hair, knowing he fucked up bad.

"I am sorry," he muttered. "You're right, I should reel it in some. And I shouldn't have said that to you. I'm sorry."

You sat down next to him, taking his hand in yours, sniffling. "Jackass."

"I deserve that."

Kenma--

He wasn't giving you any attention, at all, since a new game came out.

You gave him three days. Three freaking days too binge this new game of his, and yet, there he was. In his room, in the dark, still playing it.

You turned on the lights, and confronted him. "Kenma, come on, you've been cooped up in here for almost a week. Let's go out."

He didn't budge, making you more angry, so you stood in front of him.

"Get out of the way!"

"No, not until you put that away and talk to me!"

Kenma tried to look around you, but ultimately he couldn't see, and so his character died. Kenma slumped in his bed from the shock before getting inexplicably angry at you.

"Look at what you did!" he exclaimed, face red.

"It' just a game--"

"A game I have been working for hours! And you made me lose!" Kenma raised his hand, intent on hitting you, though his mind wasn't keeping up with his actions.

That is, until he saw you flinch harshly, keeping your face covered by your arms. Kenma stopped himself, shocked at how easily it was for you to get into that defensive position, and slowly lowered his hand as he set down the controller.

He walked past you, and turned off his console.

Taking you by the hand he muttered, "Let's go get some ice cream or something."

You nodded, threading your fingers with his, accepting his roundabout apology.

[thatfreshi]

Always (Uni AU P. 16)

Thank you all for patiently waiting :)

tw - mentions of abuse, grooming

Your eyes flutter open slowly, unsure of exactly where you are. When you move your head, you feel the bone in Astarion's shoulder, and remember the night prior. When you realize you indeed were asleep on him, you jerk back up.

"What time is it?"

"Almost six. You must've been tired."

He puts his phone down and sits his head on his knees.

"You alright?"

"Just not looking forward to today. Twelve-hour day, nine to nine, no breaks."

"Sounds horrible."

"It does, doesn't it? And I haven't slept in days either."

He gets out of bed reluctantly and goes to the closet, almost tripping over nothing.

"You could probably spare some time to lay down a little longer."

"No, sadly I can't. The location is an hour away, I still have to get ready, and I have to pick up some things on the way. All of that and maybe find time to eat something."

He methodically looks through the many fabrics, finding a silk dress shirt. Thoughtlessly, Astarion throws off the sweater from yesterday, revealing what appears to be many scars across his back.

"Holy shit."

You don't mean for the words to stumble out the way they do, but it's not often you see someone's skin decorated in old wounds.

"Right, forgot I hadn't told you about all of those. Though to be honest, I've never seen them."

He quickly puts on his newly chosen shirt, fiddling with the buttons on the sleeves.

"Are they-"

"From Cazador? Of course."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did he do it?"

He stops in his tracks, dumbfounded once again by you and your questions.

"I mean, there's always plenty of reasons to him. Misstep on the catwalk, look the wrong way in a photo, make him look bad in front of someone else in the industry. He does his punishments in private obviously, but you always know when you're due for one. Always."

Light steps make their way to the kitchen to get some coffee. You follow, silently.

"Sorry. I know I have more of a stomach for this kind of thing than you do."

"You shouldn't have the stomach for it at all."

"You think I don't know that?"

He turns to meet your eyes, and then sighs, leaning against the counter.

"Really, I am sorry. I'm just very irritable right now."

"Anything I can do?'

"No, I think I just need to be by myself, for the little time I have. I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing."

He perks up at that.

"Why?"

"I mean, none of this is your fault. No need to apologize about things out of your control. Besides, I ask about all of it anyways. If you need alone time, you need alone time."

He's so used to 'sorry's, even if they aren't always genuine. Sorry when he's at Cazador's whim, sorry to people he's looped into horrific schemes, sorry any time he fucks up. Most recently, he's so incredibly apologetic to you, the way he's fallen for you, the way he can't bring himself to leave you alone, the way you always ask about the worst of it and he almost always shares. That look in your eyes when you see him hurt, he's been trying to avoid it, because it makes him feel monstrous.

"Anyways, I hope it's not all that bad today. If you need something, let me know, okay?"

You grab all your things from the night before, and make your way towards the door.

"Okay. Thank you Tav."

You smile.

"Of course Aster, anything for you, any time, anywhere. Always."

He almost says something when you walk out the door, but simply has his mouth agape, watching you walk away after saying probably the nicest thing he's heard in years.

When you make your way back to your dorm room, you hear shouting from inside, which you can only assume is Shadow and Lae arguing again. Then, when you walk in, you realize it's actually Gale's voice going back and forth with your moody roommate. Lae'zel seems to be absent from the dorm.

"Gale, you can't be fucking serious. You're sleeping with a professor? Not just any professor, but Mystra? Really? Are you that fucking stupid?"

"We are not just sleeping together, it's a real relationship. We have something special Shadowheart, not that you would particularly understand that."

"No, no you don't have something special with her, she's using you. You work for her, she's your teacher! She can decide your entire academic future on a whim!"

"No one better to fall in love with then, right?"

"Oh, fall in love? You, you are not in love with her, and she is certainly not in love with you. She's using you and your naivety Gale."

You hear her voice crack at this point, the concern for her best friend seeping through.

"Oh, so I'm naive now? Great to know you think so highly of me Shadow. You were begging me to tell you, I thought you'd be happy for me!"

"I'm not listening to this. When you want to have a real conversation, and not just make me feel like I'm crazy for worrying about you, come and find me."

Her door slams, and she storms past you in the living space, rushing out of the dorm. Gale slowly makes his way out of her room, not expecting you to be waiting.

"And now you know too, wonderful. Are you also going to call me insane for being in love, or are you capable of being reasonable?"

No words come to mind. Instead of sitting around waiting for a response, he walks right past you, off to brood in his room alone. You decide to try and find your roommate, just to make sure she's alright, and possibly get the rest of the story. Despite your efforts, you find none of your strange friends. It's as if campus has been entirely deserted. With the new chill in the air as Fall becomes even more intense, you find yourself feeling lonely, and even sad. So, you do what any other reasonable college student would, and you go grab a coffee and throw yourself into some assignments.

Essays, discussion boards, projects, powerpoints, they all sort of just blur together. Word counts become meaningless, rubrics are like unspeakable languages, emails are a life-sucking endless void of nothing. You close your laptop and stare at the ceiling, wondering why you're even sad to begin with, why all of this seems like treacherous work. Your mind floats back to Astarion, as it often does. Perhaps he was the cause of your melancholy, him and all the scars you had seen that morning. But now it's hours later, close to nightfall, and you barely have anything to show for it.

That's when Karlach and Gale show up, which helps you snap out of the mood a little bit.

"She'll come around Gale! I may not get it, but hey, we all just gotta do our own thing."

The two of them sit at your lonely little table, and Gale sighs.

"Well Tav, how's the rest of the day been?"

"Uneventful. Sad. Boring."

Gale nods in agreement.

"Oh cheer up you two! There's still time left in the night, things can get better!"

You can't help but crack a smile.

"You know what Karlach? You're right, and just for that, I'm going to get us all a little treat."

The two of them insist that you shouldn't, but you're already walking off to the coffee bar that's going to close soon. You buy a couple of stupid little candies, just to make sure everyone will have something they enjoy. You thank the barista and walk back to the table. On the way, you feel at your pocket for your phone, but it's not there.

"Must've left it at the table."

And you were right, because when you look back up Karlach is receiving a call on your phone. You walk over to try and figure out who she possibly could've answered, mouthing a question to her. She tells you to shush, her eyes far more serious than normal.

"What do you mean he's in the hospital?"

Her voice cracks when she asks, and without thinking you snatch your phone out of her hands.

[anantplayingdnd]

Oh Hellos' songs and what Curse of Strahd Characters I associate with them!

Oh boy they are my favorite band of all time and boy do I have things to say.

Also this does contain spoilers, so if you're a player, maybe get your DM's permission before reading through this.

Ireena: "Trees" "Notos" "Dear Wormwood" "Exeunt" "Boreas" "Lay Me Down" "On the Mountain Tall"

Oh boy, it's quite a few, if I'm being honest. "Trees" is about her relationship with Izmark, obviously. "Notos" is largely vibes based, but it's a lot of freedom and being willing to fight against the circumstances you find yourself in, which is a major theme for her. "Dear Wormwood" like... come on. Do I even need to say anything about this? Strahd has been controlling so much of her life, and now she's realized who he is and how bad he is. The whole song is about rebellion against an abuser and making your own way, without their influence. Similarly, "Exeunt" is about... leaving. Running away. Saying you've had enough of the treatment you've endured and getting the hell out of there. "Lay me Down" picks up right where that leaves off, bold and determined to get away, if not in life than in death. It's her hope of one day not being trapped in the soul snowglobe of Barovia. "Boreas" and "On the Mountain Tall" are both a little more abstract, but I think Boreas relates to the periods of depression she's been through as a result of.. you know. Strahd. And as for "On the Mountain Tall" like.. tell me you can hear the line, "I know you want me to be afraid, I know you want me to love you," without thinking of her and Strahd.

Izmark: "Trees" and "Soap"

"Trees" is there for symmetry with Ireena, being a song about their childhood and how, for a little while, they were happy. "Soap" is one I just like, can't explain properly. Frankly it came to me in a vision, and sometimes I know a song fits a character long before I figure out why. I think what initially drew me to associating it with Izmark is the lyrics about having a softer side, but needing to become tougher to survive in the world, and trying to figure out how to make who you want to be compatible with who the world says you have to be.

Rahadin: "Pale White Horse"

I feel like there's little to say that isn't obvious. The Pale White Horse is the coming of death, something twisted and horrible that makes even the bravest cower in fear, and if that isn't Rahadin, I don't know what is.

Doru: "The Valley"

Doru hates being trapped in Barovia (I mean, they all do, but Doru really hates it). And because of how much he hated everything about the place he was raised, it made him very eager to follow someone who said they would lead him into something better. Unfortunately, that individual bit off a little more than they could chew in this brilliant attack on Castle Ravenloft, and that's how Doru ended up undead.

Strahd: "Like the Dawn"

One of my favorite things to do with Strahd is take things that are super cute and wholesome, like Adam seeing Eve for the first time and realizing how wonderful it is to have someone who understands him, and making it about how horrible and fucked up Strahd is. This song is normally really romantic, but I dare you, just go imagine Strahd singing this about Tatyana and come back to tell me how icked out you are.

Sykane (OC): "Eat You Alive"

I'll talk more about her one day, but you know that weird Dark Power who can let you reanimate the dead if they've only been dead for a few days? Yeah, she's the Warlock/Necromancer's patron :)

Ezmerelda: "Thus Always To Tyrants"

A song about bringing life back to a dry valley by overthrowing the corrupt tyrants that have destroyed it? Yes, obviously it's the most badass Vampire Hunter out there. (I also think that some of it, especially toward the end, that's in reference to Van Richten).

Ludmilla: "Rose"

My Ludmilla has been hiding who she is from everyone, including Strahd. She was once good friends with the party Druid, but under a different name. Also, the lyrics about appeasing your leviathan groom? Love will get you slaughtered? Ugh. I love her.

Kasimir: "Rounds" and "The Lament of Eustace Scrubb"

"Rounds" is a song I personally use a lot to help myself get out of depressive slumps, due to it's slow building and references to taking in deep breaths, learning how to speak again. In his playlist, this song comes just after everything Rahadin does to the Dusk Elves, and is him slowly trying to pick his life back up after unbelievable pain. "The Lament of Eustace Scrubb" is honestly a bit of wishful thinking on my part, since our Kasimir hasn't quite realized that he has the ability to change and grow from the many, many mistakes he's made. But one day, maybe he'll realize that he can be set free.

BONUS ROUND WITH NO EXPLANATIONS

Escher: "Danse Macabre"

Abbot: "Smoke Rising Like Lifted Hands"

Lady Wachter: "Hieroglyphs"

Volenta: "Torches"

Sergei: "Grow"

[creature-wizard]

You're so right about needing a healthy framework to engage in things like fictionkin or honestly any other kind of community based on past lives.

Like, as a pop-culture pagan who is also a survivor of a cult that focused heavily on past lives, Final Fantasy House should be required reading. Even just the Vice article, but one of the survivors has a website dedicated to documenting what he went through that's well worth looking through.

Remember kids: cults don't start with the weird stuff, it slowly ramps up over time so that you sound insane when you ask for help, if it gets weird at all. Cults aren't defined by weird beliefs and chanting in black robes, they're defined by abusive group dynamics and high levels of control over members, don't expect them to look like a horror movie says they should. Smart people get caught up in cults too, because the warning signs aren't usually obvious up front and they prey on vulnerability, not lack of intelligence.

Oh boy, I remember reading about it on the website, and it really was fucked up. Like, the leader believed that she was all of these fictional characters from pop culture, and kept trying to convince other people that they were reincarnations of other characters while abusing them horribly.

For anybody else reading this post, the site's worth reading if you want to see an example of what an otherkin/fictionkin/past life can look like. Just like, be forewarned that there's a lot of casual bigotry (ableism in particular - the r-slur appears a few times) in there. And of course, there's a lot of generally triggering subject matter (like sexual abuse) because, well, horrible cult was horrible. If you don't want to read it - I'll just sum it up thus: if you ever meet somebody who tries to pass themselves off as a spiritual expert while abusing and exploiting everybody around them, tries to shoehorn people into alleged past lives, and thinks multiverse theory means a bunch of corporate IPs depict real events in another universe, run.

On the topic of frameworks, I personally just don't go for the past life thing at all. I just reckon it as something that my brain has done for Mysterious Brain Reasons. Which might sound boring for some people, but for me makes it into another fascinating example of how varied the human(?) experience can be, which makes it quite wondrous and magical in itself.

[lenaellsi]

Aziraphale choosing to return to Heaven isn't a mistake because it's naive to want to make a difference in the world, or because it's wrong to choose kindness and hope and see the best in things. Under different circumstances and with different motivations, going to Heaven to try to change things (improve working conditions for the lower angels, lie to the Powers That Be to subvert the Great Plan, kill the fucking Metatron) is a choice I could understand, even if I don't think he'll have nearly the level of control he's imagining. (This is a trap. This is a trap. This is a trap, and Aziraphale does not understand the extent to which it is.)

But anyway. The main problem isn't "I can make a difference." The problem is "you're the bad guys." It's that Aziraphale still sees Heaven as THE source of Good (and light, and truth, etc.) in the world. He thinks the cruelty he's seen Heaven enact over the years comes from a few mean archangels and not from the fact that Heaven itself exists to perpetuate one side of a conflict that is destined to end in the destruction of the Earth and a war that, as they have explicitly stated, will wipe out demons for eternity. The purpose of Heaven is not to help people. “Good” as it exists has nothing to do with alleviating suffering. It’s just the Plan. It’s just God.

Consider a scenario where Aziraphale got the same offer but from the other side. Hell comes up and says, hey, Crowley! Congrats, you're the new Grand Duke of Hell! You can even bring your angel along. He'll have to become a demon, of course, but that's fine, right? And Crowley's like, wow, Aziraphale, do I have some GREAT news for you! (I know, Crowley would never. Just stay with me.)

Obviously Aziraphale would have said no. And rightly so! Hell has done nothing but hurt Crowley and threaten both of them for millennia. And Crowley asking him to fall would be a horrible thing to hear from someone he loves--he'd be changing himself, losing a part of his identity, committing himself to an institutional force he doesn't believe in. Of course he would refuse. (Sound familiar?)

But imagine the good they could do if they were in charge of Hell! They could make sure no demon, Crowley included, was ever tortured again, and could improve things for the lower demons and for the damned alike. They could help people just as much in Hell as in Heaven, theoretically. But clearly the actual impact is not the deciding factor, because when Crowley says he refused Hell's offer to come back, Aziraphale brushes it off, because "of course you said no to Hell, you're the bad guys!"

When I say that Aziraphale has to learn better, that's what I mean. It's not a mistake for Aziraphale to still believe in goodness, and truth, and light. That's one of his most admirable traits. But it IS a mistake for him to think that those things come from Heaven. So no, Aziraphale isn't going to come out of this jaded, no longer believing in his ideals. He's going to come out of this confident in himself to help people without being told how by the powers that abused him his entire life. And he’s going to finally understand Crowley, and that he is kind not in spite of being a demon but because of the sum of his experiences, very much including the fall. No more good guys, no more bad guys. And then they’ll be able to move forward together.

[magicrainbowkitties]

I might be biased because I'm transmasc and it's somewhat The Goal for me to "look like a man," but it's high time we put a stop to "you look like a man" as an insult towards women. Not just trans women, but cis women too. Most often I hear/see it used by women against other women, usually some gender crit weirdos with an unhealthy obsession with other people's genitalia, and I find it imperative that we wrest any and all power away from such creepy, horrible people. And so, here's my dissection of the phrase.

First of all, masculine-presenting women exist. Some are so masc-presenting that they do in fact get gendered as men in everyday speech, to dismay or pleasure depending on the woman you're dealing with. But. What exactly does spitting "you look like a man" at her do? Congratulations, you have eyes and understand that this woman is gender-nonconforming. What now, asshole? All you've done is either state the obvious or said some bullshit she's heard a billion times before.

Second, some women are simply born with features we collectively decided are "masculine" traits. I know plenty of tall, muscular cis women. I've met cis women with facial hair, with big hands, with broad shoulders. How in the fuck do these features and more suddenly disqualify them from womanhood? And to tell such a woman she "looks like a man" is to join in a chorus of bullying she's been experiencing for a long fuckin time (and in many cases, since she was a child) over something she literally has no control over. But it wouldn't help if she just "decided" to be a man, would it, because now they don't know what they want and need to learn to "accept her womanhood," even though you never did when they said they were.

But this leans into my third point, which gets at the core of the problem:

Why is "looking like a man" a bad thing?

Outside of trans people and misgendering, I mean. Because that's just a weapon for getting at a specific aspect of that type of womanhood. However, when it's said to a trans woman, or a cis woman with traditionally masculine traits, it's usually "you ARE a man." Not "you LOOK LIKE a man."

And the only conclusion I can draw, from both my experience and others, is that this is just a long, drawn out way to call people ugly. Because often in these terfy circles, you will find some of the most vile, disgusting things said about men and their bodies. I mean... They get gross about trans women, sure, but remember... They think trans women ARE men. Monster creepy men with horrible delusions, sure, but still men. And then they discuss cis men as if they're all either sex pests, monsters, or weak-willed idiots with no place in the world.

Now I will not discount the fact that many gender crits/terfs are recruited after severe trauma of several stripes inflicted by men, and that men are encouraged in our society to treat women as objects and tools rather than thinking people with their own needs and feelings, thus causing a feedback loop of neglect and abuse that leaves everyone miserable. Not to mention, most people saying shit like "not all men" when you're talking about women's issues probably don't actually care, they just want you to stop talking.

All of this is true. HOWEVER. It comes to a point where you stop criticizing specific men for their behavior, or society at large for making men that do awful things, and you start mocking men for their appearances, disabilities, weight, body parts, ect. That's just not ok.

To anyone who's been told you "look like a man" to make you feel small and horrible:

You are not ugly. Features that society has decided are grossly masculine are not ugly. Being a feminine person with masculine features does not mean you have failed to perform femininity.

You are gorgeous.

And don't let someone that believes looking like a man is the worst thing one could possibly do tell you otherwise.

[theerurishipper]

I still remember when s5 bible leaked and in it, the ending stated : "Marinette will lied to Adrien about his father and she will use his amok to change his perspective toward his father." Or something along the line since I forgot the exact line.

And people were like "Lmao, there's no way she will do that. She knows Gabriel is a bad father."

Except now it's trully happened and people saying "She did it for him, out of love!" And "Even if she did give him command, "be yourself" isn't a bad command anyway" as if the idea of someone giving other a command isn't inherently wrong. Not a suggestion or motivation, it is a command! She has no business to control Adrien's life, even more so since she only know a surface level about his life.

Just because Adrien said "Only Marinette understand me" doesn't necessarily means she trully understand him, especially when she barely talk to him prior dating and her understanding of him is mostly from the magazine (and I bet a groupie group).

I don't think the bible mentions anything about Marinette using the Amok. I just read it through right now and it doesn't mention anything about the Amok, so it's up to personal interpretation. Personally, I don't believe Marinette used it, but the scene itself is rather ambiguous on that front. And the show is so broken in its view of the morality of using a mind control device on a fellow human that I wouldn't be surprised if it was revealed that she had done it.

But if people who believe that she did it are defending that decision, that's fucked up. There's no justification for controlling someone's mind like that without their consent. If she wanted to help him be himself, she could let him figure himself out on his own terms and support him, or she could, you know, ask him if he would like her to help him that way. At the very least, doing it with his full and willing consent is better than essentially violating his autonomy and free will.

Marinette does know that Gabriel is a bad father. She may not know the extent of it, perhaps, but she does know that he locked his son up for years and controlled his mind with a magic ring for years, and she still makes the choice to respect Gabriel's wish and lie to Adrien. There is no justification for this, I'm sorry. There just isn't. "Doing it out of love," is the most pitiful and frankly ridiculous excuse there is. Gabriel was also abusing Adrien "out of love." That doesn't make what he did any less horrible.

And you're right that Marinette doesn't understand or know Adrien that well. The show likes to tell us that she understands him like no other and that he feels free with her and all that BS, but it doesn't show us that. What it does show us is that Marinette does not have a clue that Adrien isn't perfection personified until Risk, after which she never put in the effort to get to know him as a person ever again. Instead, he chose to pursue her and literally felt obligated to change himself for her sake. Which is like, fucked up, cause his narrative is about learning that he doesn't have to change himself for other people and he's explicitly trying to be the perfect guy who asks nothing of Marinette for her, and the show pretends this is all fine and dandy.

This is a very unhealthy relationship, even more so now that Marinette is gaslighting Adrien into loving his abuser. This is super fucked up.

And for those who believe this will be dealt with in the future, the bible does have this to say:

So much for that lmao.

Thank you for your ask!

[goblin-the-clown]

Why I hate Willcare + Some of you are forgetting how horrible the mci is

It's really no secret that I hate William Afton and those who try to defend him, but I want to actually go into everything in detail and explain why I feel this way.

Disclaimer : this post is not hate to anyone who enjoys William as a character, this is hate to those who purposefully misenterpate what his character is supposed to be and desperately try to defend him and come up with excuse (e.g., saying he was controlled by glitchtrap or that he did it to bring back his kids etc etc).

Long, angry rant under the cut

Ok starting off with Willcare. This theory gives me ungodly amounts of rage and I want to smack my head against a wall anytime I hear people talking about it. It's just so fucking stupid and there is literal evidence to prove the contrary. I don't believe William cares about his kids, at least not all that much. I mean, take a look at fnaf 4 as an example, if he cared about Evan he would have done something about the bullying and if he cared about Michael he probably wouldn't have even bullied him in the first place. Well looked after kids don't become assholes for no reason, because they're taught by their responsible parents that it's wrong, however William is not a responsible parent so there's your reason to why Mike is so mean to his brother. I could go on and on about this but I wanna talk about Elizabeth.

Plotting to murder people for your father's attention. Hm. Yeah that sounds like a perfectly happy and maybe even spoiled kid to me. If William cared about her he would have actually made Circus Baby for her and not for killing children, if he actually cared about her he would have done more to stop her from getting killed than just "Yeah don't go near that thing". I am sick and tired of people saying Elizabeth was his favourite just because he didn't want her to die (spoiler : most people don't want their kids to die). She is the only afton kid canonically shown to be physically abused in the books and some people still think she's the favourite child. "But Goblin! The books aren't canon!" Yes, but it's safe to assume that a lot of the traits the characters in the book display carry on over to the games, that's what happened with their names. Also there's no reason as to why this wouldn't be canon in both, like it's not gonna cause any errors in the timeline so who gives a shit?

So to wrap up this segment, willcare is stupid, pointless and erases the struggles that children of pieces of shit like William have to go through in real life. All because you want to baby your favourite child murderer and make him seem sympathetic.

So this next part is only gonna be short bc this post is mainly about that stupid theory but a lot of William Afton fans tend to only see his perspective of the mci and not y'know...the actual victims. Aka they don't bother giving any of the missing kids personalities, back stories, family, ambitions or anything to humanize them.

This is so fucking important. If you are a fnaf writer you have to make the missing kids actual people. They are children, not corpses or plot devices or something to give William more character depth. They're children who had families and friends, they probably thought about what they wanted to be when they're older and all of that was stripped away by your favourite character. You don't have to stop liking William, but try to fucking understand the weight of his actions please, he is a terrible person and he deserved everything that happened to him.

So moral of this segment is understand the tragedy of the mci if you plan on writing about it and make the missing kids (especially Cassidy) actually humans who you're supposed to feel sympathetic towards.

Uhhh yeah that was my rant about this fucking guy, have a nice day.

[mazyb0i]

Someone on Reddit tried to say that Rick only truly loves Beth, and to prove them wrong, so here I am!

tldr:

Character analysis of Rick Sanchez from an autistic fans point of view, understanding his attachment styles.

He'll do anything for BP, if season 6 proves anything, it's that he'll die for BP. He literally admitted to loving him, which I have not heard him tell or say about anyone before in the show. When

he does say stuff like that it is significant. Bird person is the only character on the show he has been openly genuine with.

If season 7 proves anything, Pers is the only one that can sneak up behind him and grab him out of nowhere without getting some snarky comment, mean look, or a left hook. They both care about each other deeply, that is clear. Rick was extremely

upset by the wedding with Tammy. Rick told the bird person how much he respected him more than anyone, even when he contradicted himself by saying nothing matters, he wanted to be with Percy. He wanted to travel with him and spent every moment with him.

--

"Then why did you help me?"

"I respect you, and I wanted you to know that you could respect me too."

" But if nothing matters...?"

"You matter! You matter to me."

"Uhhh- Rick... the relationship we have-"

"I never used that word!" - Rick (denialism)

--

It's funny how after this he calls him a judgmental dork, and not something much harsher.

--

"Why the fuck are you risking your life for that asshole!?" - Memory rick

"Because, you love him."

"You do maybe, but I don't."

"Yeah, yeah, you're real cool. Now, come help me save his life or fuck off, because I don't need you.

(Very much so loves BP.)

--

--

"I'm sorry Rick, but we cannot choose the ones we love" - Pers

"You got that right! Why do you think I'm still fucking down here!?"

--

Birdperson mentions that he would be dead if it wasn't for Rick, this also accounts for multiple times now since he brought BP back to life recently. Rick has stuck his neck out for the man so many times contradicting his "nothing matters" front, because that's what it is, it is a horrible coping mechanism to ignore your problems and pretend they don't exist because 'nothing matters'.

Its a problem that I have and I'm working through in therapy myself, it's called Denialism. Because 'if you shut yourself out from the world and your problems, then nothing can hurt you, and they don't exist'. You convince yourself you're in control when you're not, you have the least control, and it fucks you up. Rick isn't truly and fully nihilistic, or else literally nothing would matter to him. He makes sure to keep his Morty alive, he constantly brags on about how he can just get a new family, but he has the same Morty that he's had since the beginning and sticks his neck out for him as well.

--

"No, Morty. Because you were too afraid to tell me. What we had was abusive, don't you see? I'm a bad partner, because I never made you a true partner."

--

--

"I was afraid if I jumped in a hole you would just stand there and watch me, you wouldn't even jump in after me!" -Morty

But then Rick in season 1 literally jumped in after Morty when he fell through the garage floor into the Schrodinger's cat void.

"Be good, Morty, be better than me."

--

--

And when Rick starts crying at his memories of Morty in season One, but he refrains from expressing it so that Morty does not become, as he puts it, "cocky" (denialism)

I would also like to point out I feel like in the later seasons he starts calling Morty 'buddy' more?? he's a lot nicer to him than he used to be, and just recently allowed Morty to hug him without pushing him away, actually hugging back. He's also stated that he respects summer very deeply, which if he says that about someone, it really means that he does. He sees his Diane in Summer, and he also implies that summer is like a cat, her affection and respect needs to be earned; unlike Morty's dog like affection that is just given away. But we also hear Rick say that Morty reminds him a lot of himself when he was younger, this implies a lot of parallels.

Memory Rick brought out a lot of Rick that we didn't see previously, a person who wasn't fully tainted by the lack of treating mental Health issues, coping issues, unhealthy attachments, and all the other things that led up to Rick being the way he is. he said his heart broken so many times, he's been backstabbed, he is very hurt person. This doesn't excuse all of his actions but is a very good explanation and reason for why he is the way he is and the way the human psyche copes with it's environment to protect itself. it's like walking up to a caged animal with a taser, these are his defense mechanisms, it makes him look like a dick on the outside but currently it is the only thing that he knows how to do on instinct for protection, and that's why he's in therapy. This is why I believe he's genuinely trying to get better, he can get along with his therapist more than ever, even if he has sly remarks he genuinely listens to Mrs. Wong.

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"I don't like being told where to go or what to do. I consider it a violation."

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"There's a lesson here, and I won't be the one to figure it out"

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"I don't discuss problems, I incinerate them"

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"It was charmingly analog. For a sec, you kind of made me like myself." - Mem Rick

"You'll grow out of it." - Rick

He resents his younger self for helping him and makes sure to mention that he "grew out" of his ability to like himself, Rick has some extreme self-hatred. it's hard to fully love someone or Express a healthy relationship when you can't even have a healthy relationship with yourself.

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"You act like you're the one that got stabbed in the back!" -Morty

"Because I AM THE ONE, Morty. You wanna know why I replaced myself in the beginning of that stupid knights of the morning sun thing!? I SAID don't take the fucking sword! And you were like "Whatever", like I'm our neighbor Jean or David Arquette or something!! You called me boring! I've become dog shit to you! That's what happens when you let people in and they stop respecting you! They touch your shit, they screw things up, they KILL your fuckin family! Go ahead and trust them, you're gonna learn the same fuckin thing." -Rick

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