#NOT LIKE ITS A MEH RELATIONSHIP
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#supergirl#kara danvers#i’m THE kara danvers expert#and you guys should stop mischaracterise her#also not a dig at the danvers sisters whatsoever#i love them#a dig at people ignoring how good of a sister kara became in later seasons#50/50 AS IN BOTH LOOK OUT FOR EACH OTHER#LIKE THEY BOTH TAKE CARE OF EACH OTHER#NOT LIKE ITS A MEH RELATIONSHIP#ITS THE BEST ONE ON THE SHOW!!!#(in case someone misunderstands)#kara danvers meta
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God forbid Nancy want to be with a hot guy who continually betters himself and thinks she's one of the best things to ever happen to him I guess.
#stancy#YALL ARE SO MEAN ABOUT THEM IS IT NOT ENOUGH TO BE BEAUTIFUL AND WANT TO DO BETTER BY PEOPLE YOU CARE ABOUT?#stranger things#listen. i was pretty meh on stancy before but the way some people act as though its horrible and they never worked or cared about each othe#really grinds my gears so now im a stancy defender. i dont care if its canon but stop acting like it killed your pet#or shoving blame onto either one. both fucked up thst relationship they were teens shit happens#let them apologize and heal and move on#finda's rambles#nancy wheeler#steve harrington
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Babygirl I can concieve of stephcass dynamics you couldn't even imagine (arospec Cass not understanding why "probably bi but has a job so she doesn't have time to think about that" Steph apparently needs a man (she doesn't, it would just be nice) and doesn't want to platonically settle down with cass in their old age)
#ramblings of a lunatic#dc comics#stephcass#another sure to be no-notes banger#anyway I think steph and cass are both very. meh on labels#like i said Steph has a job (in my heart it's retail or like a fast food joint or something but in canon its just being batgirl/spoiler)#so she's not thinking about that rn#and cass was raised so outside of conventional society that she. technically understands why ppl want labels for things#but when you grow up in essentially a few rooms with just you and one other guy 90% of the time it just feels unnecessary in her heart#likewise she was raised so far from conventional romance and has such strong emotions about those she cares about#that she's just. not that interested in delineating romantic vs platonic feelings. She Likes You. Deal w/ it#steph on the other hand. oh boy steph#I'm not gonna say comphet I genuinely think she was deeply madly in love w/ tim and that's important to her character#but at the same time she's so. she's so#steph puts a lot of stock in her romantic relationships bc shes on a perpetual quest for connection and to be seen and appreciated#but. at the same time. she resents that part of her i think (at least early spoiler characterization does?-#-local girl desperately wants your approval and would rather be waterboarded than admit that to herself bc that's embarrassing)#so she's just kinda. acting like she's in it for the fun of it but that girl is searching for a soulmate#i genuinely think pre break-up she thought tim was the guy she was gonna marry. not consciously but if it were anyone it'd be him#and the whole ''married with kids'' thing IS something i think she wants. not every female character wants to be married/a mom#but Stephanie does imo#(also lets not even get into how much her breakup with tim SHOULD'VE effected her considering how it went down-#-and how that was never really gone into besides being hinted at in batgirls and kinda. dismissed in Tim's pride special-#-like on the one hand i get it bc of optics but on the other hands. he's really important to her! this should make her so much more upset!!#ahem. anyway#I'm not even the worlds biggest tim/stephanie guy i just think they're inch resting#and Cass. is close w/ Tim and Steph and should Get all of this since she's so adept at reading ppl#but like I said she's bad at categorizing platonic/romantic feelings in herself and doesn't totally Get it w/ steph#i should just write fic about this at this point these tags are too much
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ok so i did catch the clip where the War Chief is "revealed" to be the Master from the new colorized edition of the War Games and imo, something in the incidental music does not count as a confirmation. i haven't seen the full episode (and probably can't find it even if i was looking to watch it) so maybe there's more to it but as it stands? i don't think it's meant to be a surprise canon reveal. like iirc there's an EU novel that goes with the idea of the Master as the War Chief and another novel that has the War Chief as a distinct character so i think it hasn't been elevated beyond fan theory with dubious EU evidence for and against it.
#idk why im posting this i just saw some reactions to the war games about how dare they confirm this theory#and like. if all they did was play some incidental music then i think its more of a fun easter egg than a “reveal”#tbh i dont really have a leg to stand on here as i never had a strong opinion on if the war chief is the master or not#i lean towards not just because i dont think the war games seems like a very master type plot (meaning it doesnt SPECIFICALLY target the dr)#HOWEVER ive heard about the added regeneration scene that possibly edits out season 6b#and that hurts worse. ive always been a season 6b truther (and a Martin!Doctor is from season 6b truther tbh) and i think the theory#actually adds something to the overall narrative with the doctor's relationship to the time lords (and his relationship to Jamie)#im sure the episode has also been butchered in a bunch of different ways too by all of the cut out scenes so. meh. im not that excited#to get around to watching it#the war games is beloved to me and i will not sully her name by cutting out A HUNDRED AND FIFTY MINUTES OF THE STORY#classic who#my posts
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it will never fail to annoy me when I see writers trying desperately to control how their work is viewed and refuse to give any creativity to the fandom
#this is about arcane lmao#like igaf about what the creator says the characters sexualities are#if they cared that much they should've stressed it in their work#then you have ppl like nora who are like#'ya sure jean and Jeremy are together here is a 3 book series on it'#and when she disagrees with a fan theory she doesn't try to control our perception#she'll usually say its for us to decide#and full offense but if my straight family sees jayvik and immediately says they're gay#thats on the writer lmao#if you wanted them to be more brotherly you should've written them more brotherly#and then going 'theyre ace!' as a cop out#as if gay asexuals aren't here#like im ace and yall can jump using our identity to say why the characters shouldn't be together#do yall really think us ace folks dont want partners?#ntm it feels like theyre saying 'meh we gave you caitvi why do you want more?'#like idk maybe bc you were the one who attracted a queer audience by having queer relationships#also last thought lol#but gay ships are almost never canon#so especially fuck off trying to tell ppl that characters arent queer#urdtarah complains
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I'm starting to think the solution to my problems is to open up my mental door to my bisexuality and embrace it and stuff. Or should i continue to suppress it because i hate change and i dont know how to navigate that part of myself and its scary
#like ik its not the olden days and its okay to be bi and all of that but#people treat u differently when ur in a gay relationship#and i dont know how to like. how to navigate it#i should start probably#meh#maybe#maybe one of these days
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I hope life eases up soon man, take care of yourself
Thanks mate <3
stuff's starting to gradually get better now, actually let myself feel feelings after bottling them till it popped
just kinda turns out that throwing yourself into something so you're numb to the other things can really burn you out :') So I'm trying to find motivation to write and answer asks again, I'm hoping it'll be soon but idk atp
#vent in the tags - so warning ig#got home from uni#have been in fight/flight mode since#turns out that fucking saps your energy incredibly fast#accepting that my mother and I's relationship is broken beyond any repair is oddly helping though#she's proven that she doesn't see me as an individual well and truly now#so I can put the energy back into myself instead which is meh#processing that alongside my insanely fucked up grief hasn't been fun at all.#my emotions about it have been out of wack since she saw me crying and grieving a friend and assumed it was anger towards her#like I'm fucking grieving a friend I found out has recently died - do you think I'm not going to cry?#but no just assume its me being angry towards you and not me having feelings. Sure. *fine* I'll just kill my ability to feel for a bit#so I threw myself into the lu fandom again till burn out#and now I've been on off crying for a week#feeling fragile as shit#but Improving#somehow#I think#*maybe*#don't know what other personal event could happen now to be worse honestly#last 8 months have been a fucking rollercoaster#then when I manage to get back up#put myself back together#have a little breather#get immediatly broken back down#I just want a fucking hug man#and perhaps to be told that I'm worth something#I don't know#nothing really feels all that good to me anymore#but I'm holding on through it#there's light at the end of the tunnel
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🌻 ₊˚⊹ ࿔ 🌳
#the weather is so lovely today. it’s breezy and cool but the sun is warm so it’s not too cold or too hot out.#i wish it was like this forever.#ive been feeling so tired lately. physically n mentally & idk if its an underlying health issue or bc i haven’t been sleeping super well#the past few days i wake up in the middle of the night but im able to go back to sleep fairly quickly. but i STILL feel exhausted.#im supposed to talk about my lab results w my doc tmrw on the phone so. i hope everything is okay but tbh i wouldn’t be surprised if#something wasn’t optimal. my iron was okay last time i checked it though. sigh i just idefk anymore.#im sick of everything. im irritable for no reason. i don’t wanna do anything. like anything. i just want to rot in my bed#and even my interests are slowly slipping away from me. writing? couldn’t care less if i don’t write anything for the rest of the year tbh.#reading? i couldn’t even care to browse the shelves when we went to the bookstore the other day and it scared the shit out of me#kpop? meh.#i have a massive to do list and uni starts in a month and i have no energy. + dealing with my own brain and nonsensical thoughts on top#of that. overthinking anxiety all that super great stuff.#im also sick of putting in 110% into my relationships and getting half of it back. family friends whoever. and it makes me so sad. +#i feel like nobody even understands me. or even tries to or wants to.#im just tired#sick and tiredddddd#actually a bit sick too my throat hurts#anyways whatever#it’ll be fine i guess#i don’t want to give up but i don’t have any desire to push through im sort of just. floating. ill deal with it when i deal with it#♡ dear diary…
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today i had this Vivid memory flash through my mind of kissing my ex boyfriend (this was like 2018) and i felt so viscerally fucking revolted and I gotta say. it is truly impressive that I didn’t realise I’m a lesbian sooner than fucking half a year ago
#z talks#like the misidentifying as ace was Inevitable i think. that was due to repression that realising i didnt like men would not have fixed#(context: id’d as bi ace like. i wanna say 2016/17-2021/22 sometime and then went into ace and Questioning)#remember the time i really solidly settled on being aro because ‘romance has never not felt like a chore and putting on a facade’#babe no thats because your most recent and also singular long term relationship was with a Man#and thats the only one youre looking back on#its so funny how i dated a guy and it was so thoroughly Meh that i just didnt feel like pursuing anything romantic for a very long time#(A REACTION I HAD NOT HAD AFTER MY PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIPS WITH GIRLS)#And DIDN’T somehow consider that maybe I just Didn’t Like Guys#its nothing i grieve or feel sad about dw its honestly mostly funny to look back on#no wrongs were committed and i dont hold a grudge against the guy it was just me being confused and compheted#(…which is also a weird word to apply because at the time i identified and was out to my friends as a trans guy Binary.#This Was Also Wrong.)#was a weird time man. a truly weird time#anyway. all is well i have now been on 2 dates with a really cute girl and she gave me tulips <3#as part of a Care Delivery bc i had a Migraine and No Painkillers Or Snacks#get well flowers <333333#and now i dream of kissing her under the moonlight#With the uh. Hornetposting lately it May seem unlikely but yes I DO interact with real women! Romantically!#They coexist Wonderfully <3#Anyway. I’m gonna go to bed#Realising that im a lesbian solved all my identity problems including my fucking gender which is just fantastic#I am very happy and whenever I think of being a lesbian it grounds me to reality a little bit stronger and i go yeah. Yeah.
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2002
#my mom and i have a meh relationship and a Bad history so its embarrassing when i get nostalgic like this#vintage photo
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i've been trying very hard to convince myself to be a sokeefe girlie (<- is not a girl) or even just sokeefe neutral but the more I try the more my brain digs its heels in it's determined to be miffed about this whole situation (sokeefe) and grumble about it
#kotlc#I WANT TO LIKE IT#we've known. we've known for /years/ this would happen#and prior to it happening I was perfectly meh on the whole situation. happily neutral#now its happened and my brain's kicked into silent mild judgement#i don't /hate/ it I'm just. hmm#and it's so annoying because it spoils so much of the recent books#because so much of their draw is their relationship#and I just. MEeUGH#i am trying to convince myself its fine#because like. its FINE#but my me is very stubborn#it's mostly because I love fitz (not in a ship him with sophie way. though I am neutral on them)#and I just KNOW how s0keefe is being used as a 'sophie chose the right guy' 'FINALLY fitz didn't deserve her' thing#and i HATE IT#and it makes me dislike s0keefe via association#which is ANNOYING#having my hater moment
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for some reason all the fictophilia playlists are depressing as hell 🤨 so i made a not depressed one bc having an imagination is bomb. only 5 songs rn but drop some if u know more
#my brother in christ the imagination is a blessed reprieve from reality#not touchstarved#i mean not specifically but meh#i mean these songs can also be taken in a depressing way but like they dont sound as sad as half the other playlists out there bc theyre#relatively upbeat#music#Spotify#i think i have an easier time enjoying the fact that fictional stuff aren't real bc#every real couple i know is miserable and i've been through miserable relationships so i know in my bones how reality is not what i want#like i think ive fully come to understand that there is nothing in real relationships that i want so its just like#fuck dat. even if my blorbo somehow got to be “real” i know id end up hating them with every fiber of my being eventually without fail
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i love me some toxic/abusive ships. like sign me up on that dark content shit. but man i see some of the ships the fujos got and they just have no chemistry whats so ever
#>sluggy personal#this is why i dont like floyd/riddle most of the time#its cute when floyd torments riddle but riddle is also usually over it#and outside of that they dont have any chemistry#i dont mean that in relationship comp i mean their characters dont really bounce off each other in an interesting way#a lot of ship content is just kind meh like theyre really pushing it it to have them be together esp in a toxic yaoi way#i may be biased bc i selfship w floyd but im still right & correct
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It's 2 am as I start this, and I feel the need to put pen to paper on this thought, so to speak, because it's something I think about with relative frequency.
This is going to be more of a personal musing on my experience with Doki Doki Literature Club, and why it had such an impact on me when I first played it, as opposed to any more concrete analysis, so I guess you can keep reading if you want to know more about me as a person and my overall personal relationship to it.
Something I think about often in reference to DDLC is its status simultaneously as a satire on visual novels and all of the tropes therein, as well as a love letter to that genre, explicitly. It's very readily apparent if you've played a good few "weeb" visual novels that it very much fits that bill. I think my first experience with it makes it especially funny in that respect.
To give context, I first experienced Doki Doki Literature Club like a month or two after it came out, in a Skype call (shows how old I am) with 2 or 3 of my friends. During this period of my life, me and this small group of friends spent lots and lots of time just hanging out in Skype calls like this, doing whatever we pleased, spending time well into the next morning just enjoying each other's presence and seeing what fun shenanigans we could get into on the internet.
One frequent passtime of ours was playing visual novels. Not just any visual novels, no; we went looking for the most low effort, mediocre, low hanging fruit of visual novels we could download for free. The goal wasn't to enjoy a good story, the goal was to find something amusingly bad, whether in cliched, awkward, lazy writing, or in sheer absurdity. I still do this sometimes, though it's admittedly with a different thought in mind now.
I don't think this perception we had of visual novels, being that they're typically sloppy, cringe-inducing messes is necessarily uncommon even now, but it was especially common back then. It was "weeb shit", simple as, but even deeper than your typical weeb shit. The perception was something like watching High School DxD unironically; it's just weird.
And I don't really think the perception of visual novels being that way is necessarily inaccurate; there is a very low bar to entry to actually creating a visual novel just by the nature of the medium, so really, anyone with enough passion for a project and time on their hands can make one. As a consequence, there are a few egregiously bad visual novels, there are a few really excellent visual novels, but there are a great many just sort of okay, somewhat mediocre visual novels, and lots of visual novels created with not so honorable goals in mind.
And one thing we really enjoyed was just exploring what existed in the depths of unpopular visual novels slipping through the cracks of what people saw. For most of it, we were making fun of it, but there were a lot of points where we found stories which were mediocre, but ended up really enjoying our experience with it. I think an important thing to understand with that lower barrier to entry is that it enables people who really are passionate about telling a story to tell a story that has a lot of heart, and you can see all of that heart as a diamond within the rough of the actual construction. Even in VNs with more polish, typically there are still cracks right around the edges, where you can see just a little bit of the humanity that goes into it. It's sort of magical.
And Doki Doki Literature Club was an odd edge case, which successfully played with all of my perceptions of it. DDLC is probably the only game whose story is reliant on a plot twist where I actually went in completely blind. By all appearances, it was a silly little visual novel made with no sense of irony, and I spent a great deal of time laughing at its contents, completely unaware that they were in on the joke.
And my perception of it being this way I feel like colored a lot of what happened next when I looked into it. I forget exactly when our playthrough ended--we didn't make it to any of the deeper stuff, I watched a Let's Play for that--and I forget how the whole series of events following that went, but somehow or another, I learned of some of the true nature. Namely I saw what happened to Sayori.
It reminded me of Corpse Party, when I actually thought about it.
I'm not going to go deep in depth on all of my thoughts about Corpse Party nor any of its history, but to be frank, Corpse Party reeeally sits in that realm of "mediocre, but lots of heart" to me. I don't really think Corpse Party is very good, particularly elaborating on a lot of the lore, but I really enjoyed it when I first experienced it, and it's still something I occasionally like looking back over. It's deliciously dark, and is extremely effective at creating an oppressive atmosphere out of what's ostensibly a collection of happy warm anime character tropes with little serious personality outside them.
So when I say that Sayori's death reminded me of Corpse Party, I mean that the way it paired playing the happy warm visual novel setting straight with extremely grim subject matter was done well.
Really, there were only a few other examples of this kind of media I could think of that really effectively utilized the exact kind of gut punch that DDLC did. Everything about the way the game framed itself around it, up until the final plot twist, really did feel like they were just elements of a visual novel playing themselves out. Sayo-nara really sets that tone for me--it still gives me chills sometimes when I hear it, because it sounds perfectly like what a "Bad Ending" theme for that kind of ending would likely sound like. It plays itself remarkably well into creating the setting, it really effectively feels like it is a normal visual novel falling apart at the seams.
I think that, more than anything, is why DDLC made such an impact on me when I first experienced it (which is remarkably different than the kind of mark it leaves on me now), it played so effectively with a genre I was so familiar with, and simultaneously played "mediocre visual novel with lots of heart" straight while also completely knocking "deep and terrifying existential horror" out of the park.
It's hard to truly describe, but there's just so much that feels so right about DDLC just being as it is. There's such a unique quality to the way it's written, to the way it's constructed, that goes down to its bones. It feels like that exact brand of junk food media you go to visual novels for. You don't necessarily want to think too deeply about the characters, or the setting of the story, or any of the deeper themes surrounding it; you just want to experience a nice story with some anime girls.
And then it yanks the rug out from under you, and makes you think it's junk food media with a side of deep and disturbing horror.
And then it yanks the second rug out from under that one, making you realize it's something much, much deeper.
I think something else it really appealed to, to me, was just that sense of being on the edge of the world which most indie games of that sort always give me. There are a shitload of examples I could give for this, but this sense I'm describing is the opposite of the sense which games like Undertale give me. Undertale's world feels lived in, it feels like it exists in a much, much wider concept of a great, sprawling world where billions of people live.
DDLC feels like you and the 4 girls in it are the only people in the universe. There are all of these environments you inhabit which ostensibly have other people who pass through them, live in them, there are implications of people, but inside this world, there's only you.
I think it just appeals to my desire to be transported to a complete other world for a little while. A limited space, where only things important to this experience exist, for this pure feeling of emotional catharsis. And that's something a lot of these sorts of simple visual novels appeal to; the goal isn't necessarily to tell some deeper story, it's just to present beats as they happen. DDLC takes that, and plays with it, both in a textual sense, as though these fictional characters exist and are somehow aware they're fictional, and in a meta sense, by directly playing around with your expectations and the way the entire thing is framed.
Or something like that.
Fun fact 1: Doki Doki Literature Club (specifically Sayo-Nara, still one of the few songs I can play entirely by memory) is what got me to start learning piano. I taught myself to play, and started mostly with the DDLC soundtrack (Which is very simple to play by ear, by the way, it's pretty much entirely C major.)
Fun fact 2: What initially inspired this thought was this video, which really reminded me of other visual novels we/I played that would utilize this particular style of music.
#musings#it's hard to really put into words the vibe i always get about it#it's something i'd really like to just capture in a bottle and keep stored somewhere#there's something to it that's inextricably tied to a lot of what my life was like when i was a teenager#there's a lot which is tied to what my relationships with people when i was younger is built on#there's a lot which builds the kind of person i am today both in writing and in personality#we're sort of just on this earth to experience shit#and this sure is something to experience#i think this is why i typically have such a 'meh' opinion about a lot of specific details to how things are constructed in fanworks#like dialogue and actions not being perfectly suited to how it would be written if it was canon#and i'm not saying i write like canon or that those are bad because they're not canon or anything like that#it's just like#i want SPECIFICALLY more of ddlc. so if you aren't specifically more of ddlc and are instead your own thing i'm not really that interested#not typically anyway#i feel like i'm losing a lot of what i want to say in translation#but i hope i've sorta conveyed a lot of my thoughts on the matter#as a visual novel i really enjoy ddlc and it really does play its genre well#and also as a story outside of the visual novel part i enjoy ddlc a lot#more regular analyses & thoughts coming soonish.......#shout out to me as a teenager lying on the floor listening to sayo-nara and feeling The FeelsTM for hours
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always sort of a weird moment when the most ic line is a flirt option lmao
#shitpost#when like. my character isn't motivated to flirt per say but.#like. meh. that was the best option though.#100% ic so. i guess he flirted with this guy#also tbh i LOVE rass so im not even mad. my character is liking him more than i was expecting too#he respects him and does find him funny etc.#tavon is great at professionalism but it usually takes more for him to genuinely like someone. He likes Rass and his brother tbh#unlike me. tavon actually does like many mandalorians he meets. Rass Jekaiah and Torian are all pretty high on his list#he likes shae as well but recently has had more of a contentious relationship with her#because she doesn't like that he doesn't always follow her orders... and that he sees her as an equal#and so does she. but it's complicated because they're fellow faction leaders and they're on the same side but like#have different ideas on how some things need to be done. ie. tavon refused to just watch her die because someone was cheating on the duel#the issue is that tavon doesn't give a shit about mandalorian honor so like. any time that is a main motivator#he just gets a bunch of mandos turning on him. lol#its really fun#but as a side note#ME. the player who is not fond of mandalorians (i do find the story interesting though)#but i do genuinely like Rass#Jekiah is also good but i wouldn't say i like him the same way. Mandalorians in positions of power are always going to be iffy to me#because they're in a place to dismantle the harmful systems of their culture#and they uh. largely. don't.#this is why Canderous is the only mandalorian i truly support.#but even with him i have complicated opinions. lol
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still not a huge fan of tl*u show but i liked this episode a lot better than the other ones
#i mean im still kinda meh towards some of the changes they made#like some characterizations/relationships/canon scenes/etc#like with ellie constantly lying about the gun.....idk#but at least joel and ellie were actually in this episode#instead of just being what feels like background characters#and actually showing their relationship developing#bc tbh this whole time its kinda felt like they were like#'here are the characters from the game the show was based on. you have to like them bc of that'#if that makes sense#also adding in canon scenes too instead of just like#slapping a quick moment in the middle of the episode#idk if im expressing my issues with the show right but anyway#d.txt#also if they really are gonna drastically change the story maybe they wont kill sam and henry haha ://
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