#Mizuki deserves better

[nazbruhh]

Coming back again after Mizu5 , I want to mention this time that please

Please

Please

DO NOT USE "HE/HIM" PRONOUNS ON MIZUKI!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"But it's confirmed that he's a BOY, a crossdresser" Well then explain to me why Mizuki's reaction was THIS???? WHEN SOMEONE CALLED HER "BOY"?????

You're just there being transphobic there , so just get out.

I just have to make things clear about next Mizuki5 focused event:

Personally, even if Mizuki ended up being a crossdresser ,not trans, I wouldn't find this a problem AT ALL. There, I said it.

The only thing I care about here if I really hope the writers will handle Mizuki's situation properly, this shit scares the hell out of me.

Without being said, I suggest to be FAR away from fandom cause when it'll come out, it might be a big chaos or whatever can happen in the future.

I LOVE Mizuki's charecter, they're knowing to be funny and iconic charecter despite being depressed and going through a lot. So please Sega, please do GOOD for them. :')

[nemocat049]

so what's the deal with mizu5

[brawlqueen]

PSA. / 2024 goals !

the reason i haven't been writing a lot is i've mostly been on my OC trying to play catch up on her lore and worldbuilding. you can find her in the pinned post . also i've been planning what i want to do for mizuki for 2024, and my interest very normal love for best girl only gets better each year. i just hope to do justice by her in my own way as i figure out what i'm doing post AI1.

as i'm canon divergent and i have a few things to talk about that i'll be hoping to capture or discuss hopefully some of this year that are parts of my mizuki's canon ! so i'll try doing it in uh, the most organized way because one goal i have at least for 2024 is better blog organization . it's too late to make a sideblog for musings / etc . THINGS I'LL BE DOING THIS YEAR . - focusing on catch up. unless a thread is requested to be dropped, please message me if so, i'll be continuing it. some i will drop for my own sanity, not because i don't want to write with you again! - seasonal / holidays asks will just be holiday asks with no specific content save for people i owe, ex: bubblez' kizuna or thane's trunks, etc. why? i think mizuki deserves to celebrate the holidays or anything remotely happy because while aiba is arguably as of now her best support system, let's be real, i genuinely want to find and work on any of her relationships because she's severely lacking in support. even from 2023. i'll try to stay more on the ball for again, my own sanity this year when i reblog them. - i will be writing my version of post-canon mizuki and child mizuki, that goes from her time before adoption from date, aka with shoko and renju which will be tagged appropriately because honestly mizuki doesn't know many reliable adult figures in her life, and it makes me very sad that she's arguably more mature than...most people save say, boss or pewter or hitomi etc. she deserves better! just because AI2 certainly isn't everyone's cup of tea, and it isn't mine in a LOT of ways, i still took stuff from it, and i don't think it's fair to halt mizuki at 12 forever just because we fairly have critique of NI / AINI and not let her grow up and experience a hopeful future and more bonds to fill the huge hole in her heart. let her be happy is the goal !

now i'm working on mizuki's post canon verse, as i've restarted aitsf 1 to move to aitsf 2, where i'll take a few things that i won't likely budge on unless you meet me halfway !

the verse title for anything post-canon and generally for 18 year old mizuki / teen mizuki or post explosion mizuki will be this verse tag!

__ 𝐕; 𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐓 𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍*ೃ༄ not compromising with just this; i'm taking back all the happiness i lost.

__

now onto her post canon details i do have figured out.

mizuki and aiba are partners. one thing that's consistent is through her time with date, that can still be a thing because they ARE a family, albeit i feel estranged granted the resolution route is canon, so mizuki never really got to bond with him, get her aphonia cured, vice versa, is aiba's care through time in his eye socket appreciating the girl's strength and endurance and intelligence in both games. you can have more than one partner, and until / if we have another game and mizuki possibly gets another partner and i debate the chemistry, aiba is mizuki's partner and aiba is generally mostly with mizuki, but that doesn't mean she isn't with date too. she can love more than one person. and both dates are equally dear to her.

mizuki was still experimented on until 3 years old at horadori institute, albeit she has blurry memories at best, and i debate if she should fully remember! one factor of her godlike superhuman strength. but she also is trained in most japanese martial arts she can get her hands on! she is NOT a clone of bibi, bibi doesn't exist whatsoever despite me enjoying her personality, even if i felt it was made to mimic mizuki herself, if others who have muses with canon bonds to bibi, please talk to me so we can plot it out if you keep her as part of your canon ! as long as we meet halfway i'm more than happy to work with you !

mizuki is still a rookie detective and psyncer at ABIS. in my canon, she actually looks to ryuki, also new, but older for advice and i like to think as dual protagonists that they should have been, they get to do some cases together! only if a ryuki is willing of course.

for now, she's working on small to medium cases with aiba. the explosion still happened that took her vision clean out. she does this because of the gruesome history she has, not wanting others to suffer the same kind of unimaginable trauma she has with both biological parents murdered in various means and i'm still debating whether tearer even exists. he likely will, and if people also have the other culprit's actions in their canon, please talk to me too and i'll work together with you on that !

mizuki still runs lemniscate and sunfish pocket. she doesn't have the heart yet to really let go of her neglectful biological father's companies, even if he didn't care for her in a way she needed. in time, i'll see how she feels about this, as i do plan for mizuki to continue her education, as the girl is extremely intelligent.

mizuki is still best friends with iris, but my mizuki also considers amame and kizuna two of her really close friends, but they aren't a sister to her like iris is. they're certainly caring of her, and she'd protect them with her life, but she isn't as close to them as iris, and all of them do hang out together from what i've seen.

my mizuki is a lot more skeptical for the kizunas out there, of lien. she isn't comfortable with his advances towards one of her best friends and generally is a lot more protective. that said, it's all according to people who write kizzy. naturally she's fiercely protective of iris, who now is someone who works for her too as the president of an entertainment company.

my mizuki comes from the MIZUKI ROUTE in terms of character development but NOT THE PLOT EVENTS . iris is not inhabited by so sejima. date and mizuki DO bond like a father and daughter. date unless a date talks to me, DOES cure her aphonia or it's hitomi herself like canon because hitomi is the mom she deserves imho. but i tend to take away the development of her character and their relationship otherwise i feel the date family bond is....pretty estranged or mizuki is MUCH more doubtful of date caring for her at all granted the routes and how she tends to get overlooked a lot.

basically i want to as one of i'm sure other mizuki-mun's, give her my best in my own way, at my own pace !

and those are my goals as i replay the games (again!) . i hope to keep developing mizuki and thank you for being so patient with me as always, everyone ! also kinda sorry for the long post but it was all necessary !

[deus-and-the-machina]

ai the somnium files is interesting to me because I enjoy both games quite a bit but are they very good? lmao. lol. no

[the-overanalyst]

what i want for each n25 character going forward

i want kanade to grow. that's it. i want her to progress beyond the mentality she's had since literally the main story. it's extremely likely that the next n25 arc will be kanade-centric. i think things will have to get worse for her before she realizes she needs to get better

i want ena to be tested. does she still crave recognition and validation? could she still be swayed by jealousy and ego? does she have higher priorities now that override all that? i want her to face a choice that reveals the answers to these questions. (they could've done this in ena5 but whatever)

i want mafuyu to help the others. we had a whole rotation where each character demonstrated a new side of themselves by helping mafuyu, but she's never gotten that same treatment herself. especially for ms. future nurse whose one true passion in life is supposedly helping people, we need to see her actually doing that. specifically i want her to help kanade

i want mizuki to get a goddamn break. she deserves it. (and afterwards maybe we could see how she decided to transition)

[nerdallwritey]

Perfect Every Time

Summary: You got up and joined him in the ankle deep water. “Do you want to try right now?” Astarion thought for a moment and clicked his tongue. “I have a better idea, actually.” He gave you a sideways look, his lips quirking up slightly.  “What?” you matched his smile. Rather than answering, Astarion reached for the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head.  You furrowed your brow. “Looks an awful lot like you’re preparing to swim.” He started fiddling with the clasps on his pants and groaned in your direction. “Swimming is not the only thing one can do while submerged in water, dearest.” He gave you a sensual smile that sent heat to your cheeks.  OR Before your party travels into the Underdark, you and Astarion catch one last sunrise together.

Pairing: Astarion x f!reader Rating: 18+ Word count: 7.2k CW: smut, reader is new to sex, hand job, piv sex, water sex, dirty talk, mentions of Astarion's past trauma, blood drinking, extra mild angst, soft Astarion, porn with feelings, reader is an idiot (and a bard), so is Astarion (not a bard, just an idiot), Illmater's blood-stained rack Spoilers: Minor spoilers for Act 1 (in-game dialogue, plot points, etc.), as well as Astarion's plotline Also posted to: AO3 FAIR WARNING: This is PART 4 in my series, "Beauty and the Bard." Find the masterlist here.

a/n: Surprise!! I'm back with a new chapter of Beauty and the Bard! This part is shorter than the other ones (who cheered) because it morphed from a little smut scene into one that deserved its very own part. One million thanks to everyone who's read and enjoyed the series so far, it's so much fun chatting with you guys and hearing your thoughts and it truly means the world that you guys care so much about these goofs. I already have an idea for Part 5, so that will be coming soon, but I have a request to fill first! Thank you all for your patience. In the meantime, please enjoy our regularly scheduled silliness with Astarion and bard!tav :) (Thank you once again to @kermitwazowski for beta reading!) As a reminder, the last part was the Tiefling party!

Taglist: @a66-1, @khaleesiofthewolves, @khywren, @lollipopsandlandmines, @mizuki-nautilus - Let me know if you'd like to be added to the taglist for this series!

Several days had passed since the hijinxs of the Tiefling party had taken place. By now, the former refugees of the Emerald Grove were well on their way to Baldur’s Gate, the looming threat of goblins and power hungry druids far from their minds, their thoughts instead replaced with hope for new beginnings in the city. 

Just like he’d promised, Halsin had returned the next day to discuss the parasites, officially joining your party of misfits on your journey towards the Shadow Cursed Lands and Moonrise Towers. His calming presence and sage advice was a welcome addition to the group, especially given that this leadership role had been thrust upon you by the others with next to no discussion. Having Halsin around finally felt like there was a responsible adult among you. Not that you all weren’t adults, but you definitely had your… quirks. Sure, Halsin turned into a bear if he let his emotions go unchecked, but Gale was a bomb. 

As for you and Astarion, not much had really changed, you were both still yourselves, but now you openly tortured your companions with more pet names and cheek kisses and obnoxiously loud banter. Lae’zel had threatened to cleave you both in half on multiple occasions, but had yet to follow through on that threat. The others would groan loudly or avert their eyes politely.

Your days with Astarion were spent fighting side-by-side and teasing one another, and your nights were spent chatting and reading together. Aside from the physical intimacy and emotional vulnerability that came with being in a new relationship, it was really as if nothing had changed. And those were small prices to pay for where you currently found yourself: wrapped together with a trancing Astarion.

Ever since the Tiefling party, Astarion would worm his way into your tent at night. Whether he asked permission, or stayed a little too late into the night reading or talking or drinking from you; you would never ask him to leave. You’d slept together every night, sometimes beside each other, and other nights wrapped in each others’ arms. You were allowing Astarion to set the pace, as you were in no rush to get anywhere in particular. You simply enjoyed his company and his magnetic presence. 

The pair of you hadn’t been too intimate since the party, barring stolen and sometimes steamy kisses. That was plenty for you, and Astarion continued checking in to see if you were okay with his touches and advances. Whenever you assured him that you were, he’d smile and return to your lips. You never asked him for more than he was willing to give, and even though you knew he wouldn’t say anything about it, you could tell he appreciated the courtesy despite the smug mask he so often wore.

Now, you found yourself stroking your hands through his hair as he tranced on your bare chest, breathing quietly; a habit he told you he’d picked up to look more alive when prowling the Gate. 

It was funny, honestly, how sweet and unassuming he looked when he wasn’t fully conscious. And yet, you knew the kind of violence and debauchery and bad jokes he enacted and adored when he was awake. A small sound escaped his lips and you paused in caressing his hair to make sure you weren’t waking him. When his breathing returned to normal, you resumed raking your fingers soothingly over his scalp. 

The hour was a little before dawn. Truthfully, you hadn’t gotten much sleep last night, knowing that today was the day your party would pack up camp and make your way into the Underdark for the foreseeable future. You’d re-emerge eventually to find the crèche Lae’zel knew to be nearby, but the Underdark was worth investigating for the sake of further answers about the tadpoles and a possible alternate route into the Shadow Cursed Lands. Plus, Shadowheart was adamant about seeing the rumored temple to Shar hidden down there.

All that to say, you and your companions wouldn’t be seeing the sun for quite a while. The thought saddened you immensely, knowing how much the man trancing on you would miss it terribly. How cruel, you thought, that your adventure was leading Astarion back into the shadows after he’d just gotten a taste of the sun for the first time in centuries. 

“Why are you awake, my darling?” came Astarion’s raspy voice from the dark. He shifted his head to look up at you, his grip around your midsection tightening a bit, his eyes heavy with grogginess.

“Couldn’t sleep,” you admitted. “You should get a little more if you can.”

Astarion chuckled. “Too busy thinking about me to sleep? I wouldn’t blame you.”

You sighed. “And if I was?”

Astarion’s face fell a little. “Why the hells would you allow yourself to lose sleep on my behalf, pet?” His voice was soft and one of his hands unwrapped itself from your body, taking your hand, and bringing it up to his mouth to kiss the back of your fingers. He cleared his throat. “I mean, obviously I can understand why,” he tried deflecting the sweetness that had seeped into his words by injecting his tone with fake bravado.

You let out an amused breath and allowed your hand in his hair to continue petting him gently. “I want to watch the sunrise with you again this morning.”

Astarion hummed. “And that kept you awake?”

“I didn’t want to oversleep.”

Now it was Astarion’s turn to let out an amused breath. “You could have asked. I would have woken you up.”

“No you wouldn’t, you keep letting me sleep in. It’s like you enjoy watching me sleep or something, you creep.” You poked his nose playfully.

“It’s just amazing how much drool someone of your stature can produce.”

You smacked the side of his head and he laughed softly. The two of you sat in comfortable silence for a little while before you decided to speak again.

“This will be the last sunrise we see for a while.”

Astarion let out a long sigh and remained silent. After a moment, he said, “I know.” 

He sounded sad. 

“It’s not forever, though,” you assured, moving your hand to stroke his cheek and regaining his attention.

He chuckled. “I know that, too.”

You yawned, a little more loudly than you meant to. “Good. I promise you’ll see the sun again.”

Astarion tsked. “Honestly, darling, did you get no sleep at all?”

“I got a little,” you lied.

He held your gaze, lifting a skeptical eyebrow. “I don’t believe you.”

“What does it matter?” you asked, caught. “I can handle a little lack of sleep.”

Astarion rolled his eyes and sat up to look at you more directly. “It matters because we need you alert. None of us knows what awaits us in the Underdark and I- we can’t have you getting hurt because you didn’t get enough rest!”

“I’ll be fine,” you assured, bending upwards to kiss the corner of his mouth. “Besides, I’ll have you to protect me when I get sloppy.”

Astarion groaned. “You shouldn’t get sloppy,” he complained. “I swear, if you somehow hold us back down there, I’ll slaughter you myself.”

“Promise?”

He groaned again. “Would you, just once, allow me to threaten you seriously?”

“No,” you patted his cheek lovingly. 

He sighed and pushed some of his mussed hair out of his face. He took your hands in his. “Just… stay vigilant, alright?”

“Can do,” you said, withholding another obvious yawn.

“I saw that.”

“Saw what?”

He shook his head at you and sat up fully, stretching his arms above his head and giving you a clear view of the scar on his back. You sat up and kissed his bare shoulder.

“I’ll be fine,” you repeated.

“Mhm.” Astarion passed you one of his shirts. “Come on, darling, let’s get a move on.” He tossed on a spare shirt and watched you as you pulled his shirt over your head. 

“There’s still a little time before sunrise,” you said.

Astarion snorted and fixed some of your hair that was sticking up from putting on his shirt. “You could stay here if you want. Drown in your own drool. Up to you.”

You huffed at him, making him laugh again.

“Only joking, my love.”

“Sure,” you said, opening the flaps of your tent and crawling out into the blue that preceded dawn.

You went to stand, but felt Astarion’s cool fingers wrap around your wrist and pull you back. He turned you slightly and caught your lips in a kiss, one that wiped away whatever fake ire you had towards him and replaced it with a dopey grin. 

“What was that for?” you asked when he pulled away.

“Delicious,” he breathed, raising a seductive eyebrow. 

You laughed and grabbed his hand. “Come on.”

You’d only been able to catch two more sunrises with Astarion following the one you watched the morning after you’d slept together for the first time. You’d woken up once on your own after Astarion gently shifted himself away from you, and another time when he woke you up purposely, not wanting to be alone with his thoughts. You’d whine and moan whenever he let you sleep in, despite the fact that it was probably for the best to keep you in tip top shape for fighting and recharging your magic. He’d always find his way back to you, and you knew he needed his own space sometimes, but you still loved to watch him bask in the golden light of the morning and you couldn’t help feeling a little disappointed whenever you felt his gentle hand on your back before opening your eyes and seeing that the sun was already up.

Astarion led you through the forest again, his hand holding yours firmly. You knew your way to the ravine lookout by now, but you liked not having to take the lead for once. He helped you across the little stream that led into the clearing where you first laid together and you felt your cheeks flush at the memory.

“I can hear your heart picking up speed, darling.” He turned to smirk at you. “You’re adorable.”

“Pardon me for still being shy,” you half-joked.

“Mmm,” Astarion hummed. “I’ll pound that out of you eventually.” He furrowed his brow sensually at you and you scoffed.

“Shut up.”

“I, of course, don’t have to-”

You made a whiny sound and he laughed.

“I know, my love,” he said, removing his hand from yours and instead wrapping his arm around you to pull you close. “You’ve been so patient for me,” he nipped at your earlobe. “So good.” 

“I’m in no rush,” you reassured on a shaky exhale. 

Astarion made his own whiny sound and pulled you closer, leading you to the cliff’s edge where he’d opened up to you willingly for the first time, just a few days ago.

He sat, pulling you down with him, far enough away from the edge, where he knew you wouldn’t be nervous of falling. In the distance, the sky was just starting to indicate the sun’s arrival. 

You sighed happily and rested your head on his shoulder. You felt him tense a little. “Is this alright?” 

Instead of answering, he leaned his head on top of yours. 

“What’s something you want to do in the Underdark?” you probed.

Astarion groaned. “You don’t need to make small talk with me, darling, sometimes silence is golden.”

You scrunched your nose, knowing he hated pure silence. “I wasn’t being polite, I genuinely wanted to know.”

He groaned again. “Even worse.”

You laughed lightly and felt him laugh too, his arm gently shaking against your own. 

He thought for a moment before he responded. “That Zhentarim fellow we met mentioned a cache of supplies hidden somewhere down there. That might be fun to pillage.”

You laughed. “I’m surprised you ever stopped thinking about that!”

“Oh I didn’t, but I wanted you to think your little thought experiment had actually evoked some sort of… thought… in me.” He made a face.

“Want to try and rephrase that?”

“Not particularly.”

You hummed fondly, taking one of his hands in your own and examining how your fingers slotted together just so. 

“I suppose you want me to ask you the same question?” Astarion asked, clearly not wanting to ask.

You laughed. “Your interest in my interests always astounds me, Astarion.”

He rubbed his cheek against the top of your head. “Get better interests and I might actually want to pay attention.”

“Rude,” you muttered, a smile on your face. “But since you so desperately want to know, I’ll answer anyway.”

“Oh, goodie.”

You thought about it. There wasn’t actually all that much you knew about the Underdark, aside from the few mentions of it in the books you’d read growing up. One thing did stick out in your mind.

“Singing mushrooms.”

“........What?”

“I read somewhere that apparently there are colonies of sentient mushroom people who communicate through song.”

Astarion pulled his head off of yours to hang it in front of himself instead, groaning loudly. “That sounds like a nightmare.”

“It’s not! It’s fascinating!”

“Sentient mushrooms?”

“Yes.”

“That sing?”

“Yes.”

Astarion shook his head. “Am I still asleep? Do you hear yourself?”

“I’m not making it up!” you exclaimed incredulously. When he didn’t say anything else, you crossed your arms in front of yourself. “We’re going to see the mushrooms.”

“Whatever you say, darling.” He kissed the top of your head almost pityingly. 

“You’re an ass,” you said, pulling away from him and sitting back on your forearms. The sky was turning a faint pinkish orange in the distance. You snickered to yourself. “More like Ass-starion.”

The ass in question scowled. “That will not be one of your pet names for me.”

You shrugged. “I’m surprised no one’s called you that before.”

“I’ve been called far worse.” Astarion tilted his head up pompously, as if nothing you could say would hurt him.

“Okay great, so ‘Ass’ is nothing new.”

He sighed heavily. “It’s like you want me to throw you off the cliff.”

“Go ahead,” you challenged, catching his eye mischievously, knowing his threat was empty. 

Astarion looked at you and then towards the horizon. He inhaled deeply and rose to his feet. 

“What are you doing?” you laughed nervously as he approached the cliff’s edge that gave way into the ravine below. 

He peered over the edge, his brow furrowed in deep thought. 

You shifted uncomfortably and sat up completely straight. “Astarion, please be careful, you’re making me nervous.”

He ignored you and walked along the edge, looking past a batch of trees and into the distance to your right. He nodded and turned back towards where you sat.

“Up you go,” Astarion approached you and gestured his thumb upwards, indicating that he wanted you to stand. When he reached you, he helped you to your feet.

“You’re not actually going to throw me off the cliff, are you?” You kept your tone playful, but the anxiety you were masking was obvious.

Astarion smirked. “Stop annoying me and I won’t have to.”

You rolled your eyes and began to follow him as he started walking to the right, down a slanted slope and into a patch of trees. 

“What’s happening?” you asked when you caught up with him.

Astarion tilted his head. “I just thought an occasion such as this needed a change of scenery.”

“‘Occasion?’” you echoed.

He nodded. “It’s my last day in the sun-” he saw you about to protest and quickly added, “-for a little while. Might as well start the day off right.”

You hummed. “Why do I get the sense that you’re up to something?”

Astarion stopped in his tracks, a hand held to his unbeating heart in mock offense. “Me? Up to something? You’re far too paranoid, darling.”

“Uh huh.” You kept walking, but quickly realized you didn’t actually know where you were going. You looked back at Astarion for help and found him watching you. 

He rolled his eyes affectionately. “This way, dear, it’s not much farther.” He walked past you, deeper into the trees, and kept talking. “Did you know that that ravine we’ve been sitting above gives way into what I can only assume is either the Chianthar or the Sea of Swords?”

“I didn’t,” you said. “Though those are two very different bodies of water.”

“Give me a break, my geography lessons occurred well over 200 years ago. And we’re in the gods damn middle of nowhere, might I remind you.”

“Mhm,” you affirmed with a smile. “Go on.”

“Well, it just so happens that that ravine’s mouth isn’t far from our little sunrise spot.”

“‘Our?’” you teased.

“Focus, darling,” he said. He turned to the left, leading you back towards the cliff’s edge that had continued along the treeline.

“Astarion, please be careful,” you called after him, hesitantly following him towards the sound of rushing water. 

He turned back and held out a steadying hand for you as you approached the edge. Not too far below you were narrow rapids that gradually became calmer. The cliff that had been on the other side of the one you currently found yourself on had disappeared, forming a mouth where the ravine did in fact empty into a much larger, much calmer, body of water.

You wrapped your arms around Astarion’s middle to anchor yourself and leaned forward a little to see where the cliff you were on ended. A little farther down, you squinted to adjust your eyes to the dim lighting, and saw a tiny beach that quickly shot upwards into a new cliff. Rocks surrounded the shore, keeping it slightly out of view, and gentle waves lapped at the sand, far enough away from the rapids of the ravine to remain serene.

You caught Astarion’s eye and pointed towards the small patch of sand in the distance. “Is that where we’re going?”

Astarion pursed his lips. “Yes, that would be much easier than jumping in, wouldn’t it?”

You scoffed. “You expected me to jump in from this high up? There could be rocks we can’t see! And we don’t know how deep it is!”

Astarion sighed. “You’re no fun. Though I suppose you’re right, I hadn’t thought that far ahead.” With your arms still around his middle, he started walking back into the trees and down towards the tiny beach. 

You laughed as he dragged you along. “You can’t possibly be serious. You’d get your hair all wet!”

“Nobody said I was going to jump in with you,” he teased.

“I’m not going in alone,” you narrowed your eyes at him. 

“Pity,” he tutted. “I like it when you’re wet.” He smirked and you shoved yourself away from him. 

You picked up your pace to put distance between the two of you. When you didn’t hear his footsteps gaining on you, you decided to quickly slip behind a tree, hoping you’d lost him and that you’d be able to jump out to scare him as he sauntered past.

Unfortunately, nothing but silence greeted you. After a heartbeat or two, you peered around the trunk of your hiding spot but saw no sign of his sleek frame or shock of white hair. You started to second guess yourself; was it possible he’d passed you already? Or that he stopped, out of sight for some reason? 

“You’ll have to do better than that, darling,” came his voice softly next to your ear.

You yelped and clutched at your heart, which raced with surprise. 

Astarion sighed happily. “I do love the sound of your blood pumping.”

“How do you do that?” you asked, breathing deeply to calm yourself. 

“Years of practice.” He paused. “Centuries, even.”

You conceded with a nod. “I shouldn’t have even tried.”

“No, you shouldn’t have. The effort was hardly there, either.”

“Alright,” you rolled your eyes and continued on through the trees down to the beach.

“I mean honestly, have these weeks on the road with me taught you nothing about stealth?”

“I play music for a living. My job is making noise.”

“And I don’t know why I even try at this point.” He raised his eyebrows playfully.

“You like my noise,” you said, sing-songingly. 

“You’re loud, I’ll give you that.”

It was then that you emerged from the trees and onto a grassy dune that sloped downward onto the flat sand below. You slid down the dune with as much grace as you could muster, only falling on your ass once, before taking off your shoes and sinking your toes into the cool sand that made up the shoreline. Astarion followed after you, his long strides keeping him upright and as elegant as ever. He came to stand next to you, taking his own shoes off and placing them neatly beside yours.

You exhaled wistfully and grabbed Astarion’s bicep, leaning your head onto his shoulder. From here, you had a clear view of the sun on the horizon. The sky was a deep shade of pink, giving way to golds and oranges the closer you watched. You looked at Astarion, whose eyes were focused on the sunrise in the distance. 

“What are you thinking about?” you asked quietly.

Astarion looked over at you and blinked. Then he smiled. “Just that it’s truly a wonder you’ve made it this far in life.”

“What?!” you exclaimed, shocked and amused.

You could tell he was holding in a laugh. “You are inept at hiding and fall down sand dunes. What were we thinking when we started following you around Faerûn?”

“I’ll push you into the water, pretty boy.”

“I’d pull you in with me, my love.”

“Touché,” you smiled and released his arm, sitting on the sand. You pulled your legs to your chest and rested your cheek on your knee. Around you, reeds and tall grass swayed in the morning breeze. Astarion remained standing, watching the horizon. 

As much as you enjoyed watching the sunrise, you enjoyed watching Astarion watch it more. The way his attention became transfixed on the sky, the way the vibrant light painted itself onto him like a blank canvas, the way his entire body relaxed when the warmth of the sun finally reached his skin. 

You heard him sigh and watched as he walked forward a little, allowing the tiny waves rolling off the water to rush gently over his toes. He flinched a little in shock and you let out an affectionate breath through your nose.

“Cold?” you asked.

“You know, it’s funny,” Astarion said, his voice a million miles away. “It’s been so long since I’ve been able to move through water like this.”

“What do you mean?” You furrowed your brow. “I’ve seen you in the lake at camp before.”

“I don’t know, I guess I haven’t given it too much thought until now. Normally, I can’t move through running water like this. Don’t ask me why, it’s one of those idiotic vampire laws dictated by some ancient devil with an infuriating sense of humor. I can bathe, sure, but I haven’t been proper swimming since… before.”

You stayed quiet as he moved further into the water, letting the waves wash over his ankles.

“I have to imagine I knew how to swim at one point,” he said quietly.

“I could teach you,” you offered. “I was going to teach Shadowheart at some point too. You’re welcome to join us if you want.”

Astarion snorted. “And look like a fool in front of the cleric? I’ll pass.”

“You don’t need swim lessons to look like a fool,” you clarified. 

“Ha ha,” he said humorlessly. 

You got up and joined him in the ankle deep water. “Do you want to try right now?”

Astarion thought for a moment and clicked his tongue. “I have a better idea, actually.” He gave you a sideways look, his lips quirking up slightly. 

“What?” you matched his smile.

Rather than answering, Astarion reached for the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head. 

You furrowed your brow. “Looks an awful lot like you’re preparing to swim.”

He started fiddling with the clasps on his pants and groaned in your direction. “Swimming is not the only thing one can do while submerged in water, dearest.” He gave you a sensual smile that sent heat to your cheeks. 

“Oh,” you said, stiffly watching him undress. “Should I-?” you awkwardly pulled at the collar of his shirt that was currently resting on your shoulders. 

He straightened, naked but for his underwear. He frowned a little. 

“You don’t have to do anything, my love. I just thought we might have some fun while watching the sunrise.”

You bit your bottom lip, thinking it over. “I do like fun.”

“I know that about you.” Astarion walked towards you and reached for the hem of your shirt. “May I?”

You nodded and lifted your arms to help. He took the shirt and tossed it over to where he’d discarded his own clothes. He stepped closer to you, pulling you to him so that you were chest to chest, and nuzzled his nose into the area where your neck met your shoulder. He placed a slow, gentle kiss there that had you inhaling sharply and exhaling unevenly. He groaned with need before pulling back and readjusting to kiss your lips. He came at it with more force than you were expecting, causing you to stumble back a little, but his hands firmly gripped your biceps, keeping you steady. You suppressed a giggle and instead smiled against his mouth before opening up for him and allowing his tongue to meet yours. Astarion hummed with pleasure, moving his mouth against yours and bringing his hands up to tangle in your hair. When he finally pulled away, he left one more chaste kiss against your lips before fully pulling back. 

His eyes were alight with something that morphed into joy when he saw the gooey grin on your face. He rolled his eyes affectionately before looking you up and down and exhaling a laugh.

“You are perfect,” he said, almost in awe.

You smiled. “When?”

Astarion pulled you closer, his eyes narrowing seductively. “Every time.”

You snickered and pulled away from him, a teasing grin plastered on his face. You bent to remove your own pants and watched to see what Astarion would do next. When you saw him reach for his underwear, you averted your eyes and heard him laugh.

“Nothing new over here, darling,” he said, and the soft splashing sounds that followed indicated he’d walked into the water.

“I know,” you replied, embarrassed. You turned back towards him and shrugged. “Habit, I guess.”

“Well, cut it out,” he called, now knee deep in the water. His body was rigid from the temperature, his shoulders rising up to his ears. He turned back to look back at you, still standing on the shore. “Illmater’s blood-stained RACK, this is cold!” 

“I don’t know what you expected,” you called back, hugging your arms to your chest and trying to convince yourself to brave the frigid waters and join him.

“I rather expected you would be in here with me to keep me warm,” he said, turning back towards the sunrise ahead of him.

You quickly pulled off your underwear and started walking into the water, tensing at the cold, but willing yourself to keep going. 

“If you wanted my blood, you could have just asked,” you said when you finally reached him.

“There you are, darling,” Astarion said and grabbed your hand. 

“Hi,” you said softly.

“Brace yourself,” he tipped his head forward a little.

“What?”

Without warning, Astarion lowered himself into the water so that it was just below his shoulders, and pulled you down with him. You hadn’t expected to be yanked so forcefully and unsurprisingly lost your footing. You plunged downward, reaching your free hand out to break your fall and ended up dunking your face below the surface. You were submerged for less than a second, but you came up sputtering and made eye contact with a gleeful vampire. He sucked in his lips to keep from laughing.

“And what was that?” you asked blandly, flicking wet tendrils of hair out of your face.

“Apologies, darling, I didn’t mean for you to get your pretty hair all wet,” he pouted at you and sounded less than sympathetic. 

“Uh huh,” you narrowed your eyes at him. You crawled closer to him, made weightless by the water, and sat beside him, the water level reaching slightly higher on your chest than his. You scooted back a little and dragged your arm out behind you. You pushed it forward quickly, creating a splash that soaked the back of Astarion’s head. He instantly hunched forward and yelped. 

“How dare you?!” he exclaimed, his curls flattening and falling partially into his face. 

“Whoops,” you shrugged. Your eyes widened when you saw him wind his own arm back in retaliation and quickly dunked your head below the surface to avoid his onslaught of water.

When you reemerged, you heard Astarion snicker.

“Look at that,” he said, his tone mocking, “you’re all wet for me.”

You wasted no time in splashing him directly in the face.

“Let’s not do this,” he said flatly, his eyes closed. He brought his hands up to wipe the water off his face, even though his hands were equally wet.

“But now you’re all wet for me,” you teased. 

“I’ll show you what I am,” Astarion growled and took your hand underwater. He pulled you closer and led your hand to his cock, which was already rigid with desire, despite the temperature of the water. 

You made eye contact with him as you started pumping your hand up and down his shaft and he hissed out a breath. 

“Easy, darling,” he said shakily. 

“What’s the matter?” you asked, close to his ear. “Don’t you want to cum while watching the sunrise?”

Astarion groaned and you moved your hand up to swipe your thumb across his tip and then back down to continue pumping. You lifted your weightless body up and swung your leg around so that you were sitting between his legs, facing him head on with the sunrise at your back. 

“I know what would make you even harder,” you cooed, wiping wet hair out of his face with your free hand. Instead of finishing the thought, you tilted your head to the side, offering up your neck to him. 

Astarion’s eyes, half lidded with lust, went wide and looked at you. You nodded to him, and he pulled you closer to his chest, kissing your throat feverishly upon contact. Your hand was still wedged between your legs, twisting around Astarion’s length. He moaned as he nosed along your throat for where your pulse thrummed the strongest.

“Thank you,” he said before sinking his fangs into you. 

You let out a moan of your own, your mouth falling open as goosebumps broke out along your arms. The cold water mixed with the ice in your veins created a delicious mixture of pleasure and pain. The hand pumping Astarion’s length started to slow as you felt yourself focusing instead on the satisfyingly dull thrum that came with him drinking from you. 

“Don’t stop,” he murmured against your skin, kissing your throat and licking a few wayward drops of blood that had escaped before returning to his meal.

You made a noise of affirmation and squeezed his dick before continuing to twist your hand up and down, from base to tip and back down again. 

Astarion whined lamely and dug his nails into your scalp and shoulder, which in turn made you moan wantonly. You rolled your hips, trying to find some relief of your own and ended up brushing your clit against the base of his cock. You both groaned in pleasure and you brought your free hand up to tangle into his hair as you continued rolling your hips. 

“Hah,” Astarion huffed sweetly as he pulled himself away from your throat, his cool breath made warm by your blood. He licked at the wounds he left behind and kissed them gratefully before angling his head to kiss your mouth deeply.

The metallic tang of your blood on his tongue sent a chill through your body and you opened your eyes when you felt Astarion’s hands make their way to your hips. You broke the kiss to give him a curious look. 

He returned your look with a blissed out smirk. “I want you to ride me,” he drawled. 

Your eyes widened and the hand that was still working his cock slowed to a stop. 

He surged forward to kiss you again and moved his hands to your ass, where he lifted your weightless form to position you over his length. 

“Are you sure?” you asked. “I thought I was close to getting you off.”

“You were, sweet girl, but I’d much rather finish inside, if it’s all the same to you.”

Your lips quirked up. “I think we can make that work.”

Taking his cock into your hand again, you guided the head to your entrance before sinking down on him slowly. Astarion’s eyes closed in satisfaction and he tipped his head up to the sky, golden light painting his beautiful face into something ethereal. You sucked in a breath and rested your forehead on his shoulder, taking a second to adjust to this new sensation. You hadn’t ridden him yet, nor had you ever fooled around in water, by yourself or otherwise. 

Astarion kissed your ear before encouraging you: “Use me, my love. You’re deliciously warm.”

You nodded and tested lifting yourself up a little and bringing yourself back down. Your mouth dropped open and you adjusted your legs so you were resting on your knees, making it easier to bob on his dick. Your arms wrapped around his neck as you lifted yourself higher and brought yourself down with more force.

“That’s it,” Astarion cooed, “take your pleasure from me.”

“Touch me,” you whined, rolling your hips and picking up the pace of your bouncing.

“With pleasure,” he bent forward to kiss your neck, bringing his hand down to circle your clit. His other hand came up to squeeze your breast. 

“You make me feel so good,” you sighed, raking your nails over the ridges on his back.

“The feeling is mutual, d-arling,” his voice caught when you brought yourself down on his cock. “And I’m the only one who can make you feel this good,” he grazed his fangs across your collarbone. 

“I don’t know,” you said, your body shuddering with euphoria, “Halsin seems like he could give you a run for your money.”

Astarion raised a disbelieving eyebrow at you.

“Teasing, my love,” you kissed him softly before letting out a loud “Ah!” when he started raising his hips to meet yours.

“Oh really?” he asked, his voice coming out like a growl. “You think Halsin could fuck you as well as I can?”

“Hah,” you half laughed, half moaned. “I think technically, in this position, I’m fucking you?” A lopsided grin graced your lips. “But I don’t know, I’m new to all this.”

“Funny,” Astarion remarked sarcastically and pulled his hand away from your clit, making you whimper in protest. 

“Hey!”

“Take it back.”

“Take what back? I already said I was teasing!”

“Say I’m the only one who can fuck you like this.”

You smiled, panting and still riding him beneath the surface of the water. “Are you jealous or something?”

“Hardly,” he rolled his eyes. “But you’re mine and it wouldn’t kill you to remind yourself of that.”

“Sounds an awful lot like jealousy to me.”

Astarion groaned in what sounded like frustration and pleasure. “Do you want to cum or not?” 

You leaned forward and kissed him deeply, moving your mouth slowly in time with the rhythm of your hips. When you pulled away, a string of saliva connected you to his lower lip. 

“Astarion,” you said softly, “I don’t ever want anyone else to fuck me. Only you. For as long as you’ll have me.”

The smirk on Astarion’s face was smug. “Because?”

You rolled your eyes. “Because I’m yours, you stupid bat.” You kissed him, then whispered conspiratorially, “And I like you the most out of everyone at camp.”

“You flatter me,” Astarion said, immediately returning to his ministrations on your clit. You gasped at the contact, which quickly morphed into a moan of delight as you rested your forehead on his shoulder again. His hips rose to meet yours once more and the moan he let out as a result sounded as if he’d been holding it in for a while. Perhaps it was to sound eloquent during your back and forth, but the noise was music to your ears.

“Am I making you feel good?” you asked a little shyly.

Astarion opened one of his eyes to look at you. “My sweet, you’ve only ever made me feel good.”

“I know that’s not true.”

“It’s not, but it is true about the sex.”

“Thank the gods,” you laughed, though you shut your eyes tightly when Astarion hit a particularly pleasant spot inside you with a roll of his hips. “Whatever you just hit felt heavenly,” you relayed to him.

“Good to know,” he said mischievously, and repositioned you on his lap so he could rise to meet that spot every time you sank down on him. 

“Oh, Astarion,” you sighed, a grin overtaking your features.

“You like that, love?” he nipped at your shoulder. 

“Yes,” you sighed again.

Your bounces on his cock were starting to become sloppy as the knot of your climax began to build low in your stomach. You moved your hand to his and reversed the direction he was currently circling your clit.

“I’m close,” you confessed.

“Thank the gods, so am I,” Astarion’s voice was strained.

You opened your eyes to watch him as he approached his own peak and exhaled dreamily at the sight of him, bathed in the orange glow of the sun which was now halfway risen. 

“You’re so beautiful,” you whispered, “and I like you so much.”

“Don’t make me throw up when I’m trying to cum,” he opened up an eye and smirked at you. “You’re not half bad yourself, gorgeous thing.” He groaned when you sat back down on him forcefully. “Now, would you cum for me already? I’m dying here.”

“Almost there,” you laughed. “And you’re dead already.”

“You’re making this very difficult, darling.”

“Let me help you then,” you said, reaching a hand forward and lightly caressing his balls.

Astarion’s mouth hung open in silent pleasure, his fangs glistening in the emerging sunshine. He watched you wordlessly as you leaned forward.

“You’re so powerful,” you purred next to his ear. “You make me feel so good, and you’re the only one who can fuck me this well. The others will never know how good I feel because I’m yours and I’ll only ever be yours. You’re the only one who will ever be inside of me.”

“That’s right,” he groaned. “Your cunt is mine and I love the way it feels around me. The way it grips me so tight. You filthy thing, letting a vampire take your innocence. I could have killed you and instead I brought you the most pleasure you’ve ever felt. Isn’t that right?”

“Yes,” you moaned. “Astarion, please. Need to feel your cum in me.”

“You want this cock forever, darling? Prove it. Prove you want it by cumming for me and screaming my name.”

His command brought you to your peak and you wailed out in pure ecstasy. His name fell from your lips like a prayer, over and over, and your cunt gripped him like a vice, as if claiming it for itself. In return, Astarion groaned loudly and spilled inside of you, moaning your name repeatedly and throwing his head back in rapture and delight.

As you came down from your high, you leaned forward to place sloppy kisses on his exposed throat. He brought both his arms around you and pulled you closer as he returned from his climax. 

“You are-” he didn’t finish his sentence before crushing his lips into yours, moaning pathetically and you giggled in response. He bit your bottom lip with his blunt front teeth before releasing it and peppering kisses along your cheeks and jaw. 

“Go on,” you teased, encouraging him to finish his thought.

He looked as if he wanted to argue, but instead gave in and said, “You’re wonderful.”

The words caught you off guard and you bent forward to kiss him in a way that you hoped conveyed your gratitude. 

“I think you’re wonderful, too.”

“Obviously,” Astarion smirked.

You pushed him backwards, causing him to slip and submerge his head fully underwater briefly.

“My hair was just starting to dry, you wretched beast!” he sputtered, looking appalled. 

“Aw, but you’re so pretty like this!” You brushed some wet hair out of his eyes.

“Um, hello? I’m always pretty, darling.”

“Ah, you’re right, how could I forget.” You gingerly lifted yourself off of Astarion and floated yourself to sit beside him, facing the sunrise. 

“Perhaps you’ve had the lovely head of yours hit in battle one too many times.”

“That must be it,” you agreed jokingly, resting your head on his shoulder. 

He leaned his head on top of yours in return. You sighed happily, enjoying the vibrant hues of the sky above, still filled with the euphoria of your high and the presence of the man beside you.

“I really do like you, so much,” you said softly, accompanied by the quiet lapping of the waves on the shore nearby.

“Ugh,” Astarion groaned. “Let’s not get sentimental, darling. After we just had such an excellent time together.”

You laughed. “Pardon me for wanting to express my feelings.”

“You are pardoned.” He gave you a sideways smile. 

“Thank you, Mr. Magistrate.”

“Of course, beloved citizen.”

You both laughed quietly and returned to a pleasant silence. The sun rose steadily up into the sky and you knew you’d have to head back to camp soon to help pack up, but for now, you were content to sit and watch the horizon with your favorite traveling companion. 

“How are you doing that?” Astarion asked, breaking the silence.

“Doing what?”

“Tickling my thighs. Did you cast mage hand or something of the sort?”

You sat up a bit more to look and snorted. 

“Astarion, my love, I think it’s a fish that’s tickling you.”

“Ah,” he said calmly. Then he shot up, flinging you backwards and underwater. When you came up for air, he was rushing towards the shore, barreling through the water.

“At least it had the decency to wait until we were finished!” you called after him.

Astarion ignored you. “Slimy, disgusting, vile creatures!” He shook out his entire body as if he couldn’t rid himself of the sensation.

You watched him with adoration as he muttered to himself about how irredeemable that particular fish was as he pulled on his pants. It was then that you felt your heart swell with something big and alarming.

Oh no.

You were in love with him. 

Fuck!

[somniumfaults]

“If that time comes, I'll kill you. I promise… I'll kill you. I love you. I'm the one who’ll make your wishes come true. It has to be me.”

a warmup that I got really inspired for! I saw this quote on twitter and was immediately reminded of this fanart of Rui! I've been obsessed with this art since it was posted, and I couldn't not take the opportunity to write smth based on it!

pairing: rui mizuki/reader

rating: teen

prompt: “If that time comes, I'll kill you. I promise… I'll kill you. I love you. I'm the one who’ll make your wishes come true. It has to be me.”

tags: implied major character death

As a curse-bearer, Rui should understand your plight more than anyone else in Darkwick did. The anger, the resignation, the fear and alienation of your own body. The clawing desperation and willingness to do anything—everything—necessary to try and get back some sense of control and a semblance of how things used to be. Becoming something other than human… it was too much for one person to take, no matter what Ed waved his hand dismissively at.

The ghouls didn’t understand, because how could they? Empathy could only go so far when the foundation of one’s experiences differed fundamentally. Their transformation, for better or worse, had been a product of their own wishes, regardless of how individual ghouls felt regarding the matter. How could you or Rui relate to that in the slightest? Who had offered the two of you a choice in becoming Other?

As it was, even he could only understand you to a point. At least he had the option to live. At least he could pick himself back up one piece at a time and learn how to pretend everything was fine. At least, at least, at least… At least he could offer you reprieve.

He couldn’t understand what it was like for you, so how could he fault you for curling in on yourself and breaking down in front of him, sobbing at the unfairness of it all? It was unfair. You didn’t deserve to simmer in the anxiety of knowing each passing day was another closer to becoming something that was no longer you. You didn’t deserve to live in fear, knowing that all the bonds you were making at Darkwick would end in mutual violence when that timer ran out. Unlike him, you were something pure. You deserved to stay that way.

Was it really so unreasonable for you to confess that you didn’t want to deal with your burden anymore? 

… If there was anything about being cursed that he understood, it was that.

It was why, despite the acid that crept up his throat and threatened to leave his voice hoarse, he made a promise to you—a promise so soft that you almost missed it.

“When the day comes,” he said with a vulnerability you had never heard of him before, as if bearing his soul to you, “that you feel you really can’t take this anymore… you can rely on me. I’ll give you a hug to make everything better, okay? You won’t have to worry anymore. You’ll be loved.”

He smiled mournfully.

“Until death do we part, right?”

[mizuki-foreshadowing]

Mafuyu: The Staff of Guidance; Part 2

This is a What Lies Behind / What Lies Ahead side story. Mafuyu signs on to Nightcord early and it's just her and Mizuki. Seeing an opportunity to get something off her chest, Mizuki asks Mafuyu if she can ask her something, just the two of them. Mafuyu's journey forward has been and will continue to be painful, and Mizuki wonders if Mafuyu has any insights to help her on that same journey, because the event story is about Mizuki being too afraid to take it.

Mizuki barely knows how to articulate what she wants to know from Mafuyu, much less articulate it to someone struggling to recognize her own emotions.

But, the way Mizuki rephrases her question deserves some attention. Moving forward means finally learning the answers to some really big questions. To Mizuki, those questions may be, What will change if N25 knows my secret and my pain? Will the same things be fun anymore if they understand I'm every bit a social outcast as they are? Do I want to feel seen, accepted, and understood, or to have a space where I'm simply a girl no questions asked, and which of those is getting to be myself?

There are many questions Mizuki may be asking herself, and she can't know the answers to any of them, and that terrifies her, especially because, here and now, she's comfortable; she's getting by and she's having her fun.

During the event story, Mizuki refusing to leave her comfort zone finally tipped her over the edge, but Ena caught her, and made her a promise that was either exactly right or exactly wrong for Mizuki, because it meant Mizuki can stay in her comfort zone and never learn those big answers, forever.

Mizuki doesn't have to move forward. Instead, she asks Mafuyu why she should still try to.

Mafuyu has an analogous situation; in many ways, Mizuki and Mafuyu parallel each other. While Mizuki's own unsustainable norm is having fun in the moment at the expense of personal growth or considerations for her future, Mafuyu's is perfectly fulfilling everybody in her life's expectations of her at once, at the expense of her sense of self and losing contact with how she, as a person, feels.

Mafuyu asks herself how she has the courage to move forward in her path, which runs parallel to Mizuki's. She cites growth gradually making things better for her in real ways; she never knew she could be in a state where she doesn't want to disappear, or one where she can lessen the pain she feels.

Mafuyu also cites Kanade's promise to her as being a reason she has the courage to move forward: the song Kanade promises to write that will save her.

Ena likewise made Mizuki a similar promise, and these promises have their own parallels. Kanade, who would compose regardless of Mafuyu being saved, will never stop trying to save Mafuyu, until Mafuyu is saved. Ena, who would be Mizuki's friend regardless of Mizuki sharing her secret or not, will never pressure Mizuki to open up to her or show her her true self, until Mizuki is emotionally ready to.

Mizuki admitted to herself in Episode 8 that she's afraid she'll still never tell Ena her secret even after she's ready, because Ena's promise means she could be Mizuki's friend indefinitely. Likewise for Mafuyu finally telling Kanade when a song does save her, although this question can only be explored by Mafuyu, who isn't emotionally equipped to explore it yet.

Things will be different after that final turning point, for both members of each pair. Mizuki is afraid of what that means, but Mafuyu's response here implies that she may be excited for it.

To Mafuyu, that destination is somewhere she wants to be, no matter what it means or each difficult step she'll need to walk to get there. It's a destiny, a sense of purpose; it's something she has to do.

Mizuki understands this now, but we don't get to see whether she is receptive to the idea or not. Interestingly though, we don't even get to see whether Mizuki changes the subject or gets evasive, either; the conversation is simply interrupted by the other members signing on at 1 am.

[despairots]

#A NIGHT TO REMEMBER, o. dazai!

a special oneshot!

description, it’s special to know how the other feels. to communicate is the best, though, dazai isn’t one for words but it’s fine, you’re the same. neither of you can put the feelings you have into words.

— story contains, angst, established relationship, swearing, suicide mentions, depressing talks, “no longer human” connections i think?, r! psychoanalysis’s i guess?, mental health, trauma talking, character deaths, if i missed anything let me know! gender neutral! reader.

“why are you writing this?” bc dazai is one of the characters i heavily relate to on another level. hes so much different from mizuki akiyama and satoru gojo. and this is just me talking a lot about dazai’s character and analyzing him… btw, r! wears a black blazer (or leather jacket) white button up with a black waist coat, either brown shorts or pants (maybe black of u want), underneath the shorts or pants are like black tights and slip on penny loafers.

long before you started dating dazai, there was an obvious connection that you only saw and felt. obviously, you were friends during those time periods because you worked in the same place, everyone there were friends.

though, the friendship you two had were entirely different from the rest, had the same humour but showing it differently. you wouldn’t lie and say that dazai flirting with you just to ask for a double suicide didn’t concern you, because it did. there’s no doubt that he’ll try and eventually succeed (although, death doesn’t accept him).

there’s nothing that can kill this man, no matter how hard he tries. you picked that up during one of his failed attempts, it almost succeeded if kunikida wasn’t there, you thanked him a ton. all he said in response is that; “i have to look over that idiot one way or another.” no matter how much dazai annoys his coworkers, they still care.

when dazai tries to commit and somewhat fails, it’s almost like he’s punishing himself for still being alive. you know his past, after all, you were in port mafia with him, even though you two didn’t work together or how he didn’t know you during that time, you sure knew him.

he was surrounded by death, in the port mafia and the ada, it follows him yet never accepts it’s his time to come to the afterlife. he makes these plans that somewhat end up succeeding though he hurts himself in the process, always worrying you. what if eventually death actually accepts him at some point?

dazai has been extraordinarily smart every since he was a kid to the point where he’s been dehumanized by dubbing him; “the demon prodigy”. you didn’t know anything about his parents, you did know what drove him to be tired of living. he’s tired living, bored by life and the people around him, to him, they are easily predictable and manipulated that nothing can surprise him.

he can’t find sense to the world but most importantly, he doesn’t find sense in life, he ends up reverting to extensional depression, continuing the cycle he lives in.

dazai has been exploited ever since he was 14 and taken into the port mafia by mori. he was kept alive by mori, by chuuya, by everyone. he was used until there was nothing left. he never had any love nor hope (that he’d ever have someone to understand him) until a friend he later brought up to you, oda.

he truly believed he deserved everything that happened to him in the port mafia.

you believe that younger dazai never believed that he could be better, but if he’s changing now than he always had the ability to change, just never tried. he was sure the mafia was the only fate he had and the only place to escape of living.

then oda died. dazai was free, with ango’s help of wiping his criminal records. without ango’s help, he would’ve never been free from mafia, though he knows his past will always haunt him, he’s accepted that. he also knows that his indebted to ango, he knows he owes him.

since oda’s death, dazai’s trust had ran thin and he’s always on guard, his ability to open up to anyone had been cut off because he can not lose anyone again. the things he cares about and didn’t wanna lose, is lost the moment he gains it.

his plans always evolve other people, rather to manipulate or exploit. you don’t blame him, if it meant surviving, you would do it too.

he is someone who jokes but never opens up nor can be his true self. he’s a wreck who will drag anyone else down with him, that was a price you had to pay for dating him. he repulsed the idea of love and being in a relationship with you because of how he’ll be afraid of losing you.

dazai dated you as a joke, to see how thing will end, until he realized that you were somewhat different. you were always one step of ahead, had almost the same ability that involved contact, and you had this missing glint in your eyes. that’s just the surface though.

dazai knows there’s more to you— he doesn’t know about your connections to the port mafia though— but he doesn’t bother bringing the topic up to you though nor does he like talking about it.

at nights like this, where he’s staring aimlessly somewhere and devoid of emotion, he’s completely vulnerable in your shared dorm. sitting on the couch, cheek on the palm of his hand as the other searches the cold touch of your hand, seeking for some company.

—and you’re there. sitting on the couch with him and a book discarded in your lap, only staring at dazai with a look of curiosity and content, he looks peaceful despite the war going on in his head.

(you were memorized by the destruction he creates and has, it was peaceful to know what beautiful destruction that dazai carries with him).

when dazai feels the cold skin of your hand, he could feel his ability cancelling yours out as your hand covers his, holding it tightly yet so soft that he wonders if you’re even there. dazai finally looks at you, face still devoid of emotion, watching you reopen your book.

“morning, sleeping beauty.” you hummed softly, an amused tone with your words. dazai groaned and knocked your book off your lap, kicking his legs up into your lap and laying down, now staring up at the ceiling.

hearing dazai go silent wasn’t rare, it was rather common when you two are in your shared dorm, but not hearing him say something stupid back confused you.

you turned your head to dazai, taking notice of his eyes that threatened to pour tears in front of you, “you okay, ‘samu?” knowing him for a while now, he wouldn’t open up and talk about his feelings. it’s fine though, you’re like that too, and you wouldn’t mind waiting forever even if it didn’t come.

dazai didn’t respond.

he never did.

he closed his eyes and if you listened closer, you could hear the shaky breath that he exhaled. taking his hand in yours, you placed a chaste kiss to his palm, the contact making dazai open his eyes slowly and sit up on his elbows.

“when are you gonna leave?” he’s says stupid shit all the time, it doesn’t effect you, none of his words effect you. it should’ve effected you but it didn’t, and dazai could tell by the unamused look on your face, “when are you gonna take your life seriously?” you lightly jabbed at him, hearing him scoff and mutter ‘hypocrite’ underneath his breath.

dazai sat up properly, scooting closer to you and grabbing your hand, setting his head on your shoulder. dazai’s touch starved but refuses any contact that doesn’t involve him initiating it, you’re an expectation, you’ve always been every since the relationship started.

silence took over you, the fan in the background aswell as dazai’s calming breath stirring you into a tired state, laying your head on dazai’s head (knowing the neck pain wouldn’t be worth it tomorrow).

“y’know i’d wait, right?” dazai hums underneath his breath as a response, “how do i know you’re not lying?” and you scoff. rolling your tired eyes, for a guy like him to ask you that question is amusing. “we’ve been lying to eachother for a while but i’m not lying about this, ‘samu.”

the former executive makes himself more comfortable in the crook of your neck, forcing you to lay down and keep him close, “i know.” the words came out muffled, and alas, his eyes are shut again and his sleeping in your arms that are now warm.

with him being asleep, you could pick out the smallest details about the boy in your arms. in your arms, he isn’t the former demon prodigy, in your arms, he isn’t a former port mafia member, in your arms, he isn’t a dehumanized person.

he’s just a boy.

osamu dazai isn’t one for words, but it’s okay, because you’re not one for words either. it’s gonna be like that for awhile, or forever, only time could tell. dazai knows this; you know this. and since dazai’s betrayal to the port mafia, he’s changing, but if he’s changing now, he was always capable of changing, he just never cared enough to try.

osamu dazai isn’t one for words, neither are you.

tick.

[correctproseka]

Our prsk appearance headcanons that no one asked but

(btw by tan we mean: darker skin tone we didnt think of one specific to most of them)

Ichika: skinny/girl twink, her arms hurt when she carries her guitar her full day. Girl loser /affectionate, also taller than canon. Her hair is straight but thick.

Saki: chubby (she deserves after the hospital time), very visible freckles on her whole body, though she tends to hide it with makeup, and her face is round and with chubby cheeks even while sick. Canon size. Wavy but thin hair which sucks to take care of.

Honami: fat, and strong. More on the tan side, taller than canon, slightly wavy hair

Shiho: average id say? Some light freckles, gets confused with a twink a lot but she's just a lesbian, shorter than canon for funsies, straight hair, very light freckles on her cheeks.

Minori: she's more legs than human, like a fucking deer. /Hj. Gets stronger/chubbier as mmj goes on because she needs to adapt her diet for the amount of energy she's releasing, tan, shes average size, id say canon is good for her, thin and straight hair

Haruka: . Thin for . Canon reasons. However she has some muscles. Pale id say? Also canon height, thick and straight hair.

Airi: muscular, not too chubby for idol reasons otherwise she would be, tan too, slightly bit shorter, thick curly hair.

Shizuku: she looks like a swan and I can't explain it. Thats all, taller than every girl and Tsukasa, slightly wavy but thin hair. Very light freckles on her nose.

Kohane: chubby-ish. Round face, looks like a hamster, same height as canon, straight-ish hair

An: very Lean, not very muscular but athletic like that tiktok archery twink (also random but has done pole dance+street dance classes), tan, she's really fast and eats a lot without gaining weight, which she complains about, also taller than canon, thick and straight hair.

Akito: a little muscular, especially his legs, tan, lots of freckles on his face and shoulders, bit shorter than canon, freckled, thick hair thats slightly wavy.

Toya: twink and pale, his fingers are pianist long and he's very elastic and stretchy somehow. Taller than canon, veery straight and thin hair.

Tsukasa: he looks like a twink but somehow has muscles, tan, his freckles are very visible because of the sun but they're only around the cheeks, wavy hair like Saki.

Emu: chubby/fat, stronger than she looks, same height as canon, straight hair.

Nene: girl twink once again, pale because she does not know what sun is, thin ass hair.

Rui: twink, and also looks like a square, he's taller thsn canon (shorter than rui) but slouches a lot, his hair changes on the day tbh, and its a bit longer than canon.

Kanade: extremely thin but after eating nofmally again she goes to average id say? Chubby cheeks though, extremely pale anyways, canon height and straight hair thats thin and frail but it gets better as niigo teaches her how to take care of it. Mizuki also cuts her hair to shoulder height

Mafuyu: muscular, taller than canon (taller than mizuki, tanner than canon too, thick wavy hair, Mizuki also cut his hair.

Ena: chubby, same height as canon and tan, her freckles are only around the nose and cheeks but they're very visible, not as much ws Akito or the Tenmas tho, letting her hair grow and its slightly wavy but she tends to make it straight because she claims its easier, she's also a ginger but dyes her hair

Mizuki: lean, but not as much of a twink as the others, also her legs look long too, grows a bit more than canon, straight hair who tends to try and give it a bit more waves to it.

[blue-hair-and-pronouns-tourney]

Propaganda

Kris Dreemurr:

-They’re canonically nonbinary and have blue hair and are constantly going through it — being possessed for one but also misgendered by the fandom cOUGH— so they should win bc they deserve so many more Ws

-in the dark world? impeccable blue hair and the pronouns. they touch cheese which is like touching grass but better. it's kris deltarune man they're awesome

Mizuki:

No propaganda was submitted

[playroom-sekaii]

do you have any fluffy/nice small mizuki headcanons after the bombshell that was mizu5? i feel so bad for them i hope they get better :(

Why of course!

(This post uses she/they pronouns for Mizuki!!)

Fluffy little Mizuki hcs 🎀

(Oh how they deserve better...)

🩷 They love pretending to be a magical girl! Lovely Ribbon Mizu-chan is here to save her cgs and sibbies from any bad guys or monsters that may threaten them! Usually involving the monsters on the bed or when Ena decides to be the "worstest person ever" and says no more cookies since they "already had five" smh those are rookie numbers.

🩷 Most of her cg titles are sibling ones (Kanade-neechan, Ena-nee, Rui-niichan, etc), but Honami is her mama, she's everyone in Nightcord's mama, she cannot fight it /lh

🩷 Absolutely hates naps, but adores the idea of "catnaps". They'll only go down for a nap some days if their cg agrees to let them curl up in a ball on a chair, their lap, or a "cat bed" made of pillows. Sunbeams help immensely. They may or may not also be a kitty regressor that hasn't realized it yet-

🩷 That being said, for how chaotic they can be while small, they love quiet time, usually while other little ones are napping. Cuddling up close with a cg, maybe with a white noise machine or gentle music on, working on simple crafts or reading a picture book, either with them involved or just having their caregiver as a comforting presence. This especially helps when they've had a long or stressful day, they calm down immediately.

🩷 Loves claw machines, since she already loves stuffed animals while small. She's been fuzzy while walking home with Toya before and they passed an arcade, which ended in Mizuki being so impressed by "Mr. Toya's" super cool crane machine skills, since even though she loves the stuffed animals she usually needs Mafuyu or Rui to win them for her when she's small (oh, the tragedies of poor hand-eye coordination...)

🩷 They love the idea of being a cool big sister to younger regressors, just like Yuuki! They wanna help their cgs with everything they can, even if sometimes it's a bit messy (they aren't allowed to refill sippy cups on their own anymore), it's the thought that counts!

🩷 Speaking off, before telling Ena and the rest of Nightcord, the only ones that knew they were an age regressor were Rui and Yuuki, who saw them regressed a few times in middle school and helped them out before they eventually told her what it was later. She's very supportive, buying them lots of cute little gear and cging over phone or video calls when they're alone, even when their time zones get a bit wonky she'll never leave her baby sister behind.

🩷 She has a brown stuffed kitty named Enanyan. When she's big Ena gets tsuntsun about it but when Mizuki's regressed it makes her feel so happy, like, woah she's actually doing good as a cg-

[bababerries]

Can’t sleep bc I’m anxiously anticipating mizu5

I really really want them to explicitly commit to Mizuki’s transness. I’m pretty confident Mizuki being a transgirl is colopales intended purpose but I’m not super confident in colopale being explicit about it I worry they’ll leave it vague to keep both sides happy and that would be very disappointing and such a cowardice move. I’m just exhausted of most of the conversation around Mizuki being around if they’re actually trans.

If colopale wanted to make a GNC/crossdressing character that’s fine but if Mizuki was supposed to be that that would be incredbily malicious, deceitful and transphobic with the way they went about setting Mizuki up. (The idea of having to hide your hobby in GNC fashion by living as the opposite gender is really ridiculous way of going about it and has really bad implications) It sucks that Mizuki is such a great transfem character that people spend more time arguing about it if she’s transfem then discussing how the narrative goes about her trans femininity because what they do with her is very interesting.

And even fans who do respect her transgirl identity I feel like are a bit close minded in some regards. I think it’s gotten better over time. And while I’m not opposed to they/them nonbinary fem presenting Mizuki as an interpretation I really don’t like how people say that Mizuki IS without a doubt nonbinary (they could be, but we don’t technically know the term they use for them self specifically) and got pretty hostile at transgirl and she/her being used for Mizuki. And the arguments for this bother me

“They use they/them for them in the text!” The text of the English translation for sekai and I think people forget that. It’s just a bit Eurocentric and assumes that Japanese pronouns work that same as English ones when they dont. The translation just tried to translate boku as literally as possible. (The story also would just not work if people Mizuki was afraid to come out to was already using they/them pronouns for them) and it neglects a really interesting transfem read for Mizuki where she as a transgirl tries to third gender herself because she still doesn’t fully accept herself for who she is and it makes the use of more feminine pronouns in later stories as she gains confidence in herself really loving to me.

And I want to talk more about Mizuki in this lens…. I find her really powerful and she’s affected me and some of my friends a lot through her exploitation of transness. I think she’s really great rep that deserves to be discussed more in deph. I’m sick of people disrespecting her identity. I honestly do feel a bit pessimistic regarding colopale being explicit and debunking transmasc/gnc male “”reads”” of Mizuki but I really hope I’m proven wrong. I don’t want to hold their hand on this because trans girls really deserve this. They deserve respect. She deserves respect.

[project-sekai-archives]

mizu5 leaks >.<

mizuki: ena... I- I hid something from you. from all of niigo.

ena: .... what is it, mizuki?

mizuki: i... i...

ena: ..!

mizuki: I'm sure you've all heard about the recent allegations against me, and I knew I couldn't stay silent about this any longer. It's time to finally come clean and explain exactly what happened, and the steps that I'm taking to address the problem.First of all, let me say that I am sorry. I know I fucked up, and I can't take back what I've done. I'm a human, and sometimes I make mistakes. That's not an excuse, but it is the truth. My heart goes out to the people that may or may not have been harmed by my actions. A number of people - I won't name names - have spoken out against what I've done, and they're right to do so. I deeply regret my actions, and while I don't expect them to forgive me, I do hope that the actions I've taken since to prevent this from happening again will help ease their suffering. I was in the wrong here, and they have every right to be angry at me. Are all of their accusations true? Who's to say. Many of the things they have allegedly claimed I have done may have been true, and many of them might not have been. It's important to consider the context that these words or actions might have taken place in, and withhold judgement until all the facts about this situation have become more clear. A lot of misinformation has been spreading about the things I did, and no one, not even me, can be entirely sure what exactly took place.That being said, I deeply regret what happened, and take full responsibility for the consequences of whatever it was that I did. I had an opportunity to try and make things better, and it's clear that the choices I made were wrong, and only made things worse. I know that these words won't make everything right. Nothing I can do now will make this easier for the people who were affected by my actions, and I don't expect it to. All I can do now is be as honest as possible and make sure everyone understands why I did what I did. This whole experience has been extremely humbling, and has shown me how important it is to consider to consequences of carelessness for someone in my position. I have dedicated myself to ensuring that the things I have done will never happen again, in all likelyhood.Above all else, I want everyone to know that my heart goes out to those who were involved in this, and that I am taking total responsibility for what I have done. I hope you will consider all the facts I have laid out here, and come to your own conclusions about this whole situation.Finally, if anyone else feels the need to publicly apologize, or respond to accusations against them, I'd like to offer this thread as a space to do so. The public deserves to understand these situations from all sides, and I hope we can open a dialogue to make sure that these kinds of incidents don't happen again.

[drinkabletoxicdishsoap]

sorry for pjsk posting instead of fairly odd parents a new wish posting i promise ill get back to it but it’s been a month since mizu5 and im still not over it

MIZUKI YOU DESERVE SO MUCH BETTER IM SO SORRY THAT YOURE DOOMED BY THE NARRATIVE AND IM SO SORRY THAT THE FANDOM CALLS YOU A GUY OR CROSSDRESSER EVEN THOUGH YOURE CLEARLY TRANSFEM !!! IF ONLY SOME PJSK FANS HAD READING COMPREHENSION!!!

[tomatosoupandpasta]

Sooooo I saw a post where @bobcross1010 was yapping about their au AND THAT MADE AN OLD SORTA AU FLESH OUT

(It's sorcervalier, but like.... not angsty??? Don't get me wrong I LIVE for sorcervalier angst and absolutely bonkers insane wild angst but like... too much bad media is harmful for you yk? [Idk what I'm yapping about])

ANYWAY, IN THIS AU WXS IS ALL CHILDHOOD FRIENDS BECAUSE I LOVE CHILDHOOD FRIENDS WXS

So, Tsukasa has great aspirations to be a knight (he's sorta rich but at the same time his parents don't have a noble status), Emu wants to be on stage (she's a princess because yes), Rui loves magic (I turned everyone's favorite engineering kid into a wizard teehee), and Nene wants to be a songstress

ANYWAYS, Tsukasa is all like "when I'm a knight, I'll never hurt anyone that doesn't deserve it!" And they're all like "SICK❗️❗️❗️❗️🔥🔥🔥🔥"

Flash forward and Tsukasa and Rui are dating yipee!!!

Flash forward some MORE and Rui is a criminal because he might've indirectly caused a nobles death due to being manipulated???? (Like DAWG 💀💀)

And you'd think "Oh, but tsukasa doesn't know that! He's going to go back on his promise and put his boyfriendin jail :(" nerp, he knows that Rui didn't do it but because he is tasked with bringing the "Mad Sorcerer" to jail

BUT HE KNOWS RUI DIDN'T DO IT YK????? So it's basically a bunch of shenanigans where Tsukasa has to constantly pretend he was SO close to catching Rui. Like "DANG! I was this close yk???" and some people think "is he just a bad knight????" But NO he isn't so people are just convinced that the Mad Sorcerer is just INSANELY powerful

But in reality it's a lot of Tsukasa shoving Rui under a table and being like "Oh, darn, General! I was so close to catching him! Better luck next time hahaha!"

But here's the thing, they have TRIED to get Mizuki and Akito to try and catch the sorcerer instead but Mizuki is all like "yooooo!!!! I knew this guy I'm middle school!!!!!" and akito is all like "no thanks." And just leaves because he doesn't like Rui or smth idk, he just can't be bothered.

And you may think, "Oh he has to be caught someday! Insert the angst!" like nerp. Emu is the princess remember? She'll just be like "Oh Tsukasa-kun! Come bring Rui- AHEM AHEM AHEM, I mean, this dude to the dungeon." And Tsukasa's all like "Ooohhhh, sorry, he escaped while I blinked." As Nene got him out of the dungeon through an open window.

Also everyone knows that tsukasa and rui are dating but they think that Rui "betrayed" Tsukasa so they give him some leniency when he fails to catch him but in actuality he's just shoving his boyfriend in the worst hiding spots™ and he never gets caught.

Overall just a silly little sorcervalier au where Tsukasa is making sure his boyfriend doesn't go to jail and Rui does whatever he pleases