#Milly is the one eating a cookie

[margarineonbread]

Girls night

[cameronspecial]

The More The Merrier

Pairing: Dad!Drew Starkey x Reader

Warnings: N/A

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 0.8K

Summary: Christmas for Y/N and Drew is a little different for the pair since the kids were born, but that's okay.

Masterlist

Before kids, Drew and Y/N used to be able to sleep in until noon on Christmas Day. They would roll out of bed, have a light late lunch while exchanging gifts in front of the tree and then head to whoever was hosting’s house on his side of the family. Christmas Eve was reserved to celebrate with her side of the family. But since the kids came along, Christmas Day was a whole fiasco. When Millie comes barreling into the room to jump on their bed, her parents have barely gotten three hours of sleep. Between getting the presents from Santa out and taking care of Tristan, sleep didn’t get to find Y/N and Drew. “It’s Christmas! You have to wake up,” she yells, bouncing on the bed like a bouncy ball. Y/N tries to escape her child’s screams and pretends to still be asleep. Drew, a victim of insomnia, accepts the defeat and rights himself to a sitting position. Maybe he can save Y/N from the same fate. “Come on, Sweetie. How about we go eat some breakfast before we open presents? Let Mommy sleep a little more,” he suggests, noticing that it is seven in the morning. However, it doesn’t work because Tristan’s cries have Y/N instinctual getting up. She heads to the nursery, “It’s fine. Go to the living room and I’ll bring Trist.”

Drew and Millie make their way to the living room and a few minutes later, Y/N arrives with Tristan in her arms. “Can we open presents now, please?” Millie begs, scrambling off her father’s lap to the tree. Y/N shakes her head and puts Tristan on the ground beside his sister, “Millie, you know we take pictures before we open the gifts.” The excited girl lets out a huff, settling beside her brother for the picture. The kids suffer through a few pictures before they are finally allowed to open their presents. 

Drew’s eyes are focused on his children until a weight appears on his shoulders. He looks down to see his wife fast asleep on him. He smiles at her and wraps his arm around her shoulder to bring her to his side. This catches Millie’s attention, so she runs over to her parents. “Is Mommy sleeping?” she whispers. Drew nods and holds his finger up to his lip. The answer seems to satisfy his daughter. She runs off to presumably go play with her new toys. Instead, she picks up her new Doc McStuffns blanket and returns to throw it onto her mother. She again leaves and then rushes to her parents to bring back one of the Christmas cookies they decorated last night. “Mommy likes cookies. It will give her energy when she wakes up,” Millie explains to her father. Drew feels as though he just drank a hot chocolate because a warmth stirs in his stomach. They are raising such a thoughtful and smart daughter. 

Feeling the cookie being placed on the blanket, Y/N’s eyes widen to see what it is. She notices the time on her phone and brews up a storm of swear words. They are going to be late to Brooke’s house. She hurries her family to get ready and they head to the family gathering. 

——

The tired couple placed the sleepy children in their own beds before going to their shared bedroom. They meet each other with a soft smile. “You know what we forgot to do this morning?” Y/N mumbles to her husband, leaving the room for a second to get something. She comes back with two gifts in her hands, “We forgot to open our gifts from each other.” Since they got married, Y/N and Drew agreed that they would make each other handmade gifts for Christmas. Birthday gifts can be bought, but Christmas presents have to be made. He gives her a grin, they both get changed and then sit on their bed beside each other. “You go first,” he encourages, placing his gift on her lap. Her hands carefully unwrap the small box to find a pair of dangling earrings. They both have turquoise beads, but one has an M charm and the other has a T one. “These are beautiful, Drew. Thank you,” she praises, pulling him in for a hug. “Here, open yours now.” 

His is a medium-sized rectangle. Like his children, Drew takes no time in ripping the paper open. Underneath, he finds a scrapbook. There are dozens of pictures of his family and him. Each page is occupied by a small blurb about the picture taken. “Sweetheart, this is amazing. Thank you. I can take this with me when I’m away for work,” he informs, kissing her temple. She bobs her head, “That’s the idea.” Silence fills the room for a few seconds before Drew speaks up. 

“Our Christmases are kinda different now with the kids.”

“Yeah. But in a better way. Which is weird to say because we got so little sleep last night.” 

He chuckles with his lips pressed to her cheek, “I agree. I think it’s because the more the merrier.” 

Taglist: @winterrrnight @loves0phelia @thelomlisrafecameron @nonbullshit-toleratingkindagirl

[rhiandoesfandom]

Helluva Boss Incorrect Quotes Post Ghostfuckers:

Blitz: I don't know if I can feel joy anymore

Millie: wanna fuck about it?

Blitz: you mean talk?

Millie: no

Blitz: sorry it's just...I think of you way too platonically for that

Millie: oh thank Satan me too.

-----------

Moxxie: BANKRUPTCY BANKRUPTCY BANKRUPTCY!!

Loona: yeah! Great acting. Now do a flip 👍

-----------

Blitz: I never believed in ghosts until I came face to face with one.

Millie:.....

Blitz: get it-came 😁

Millie:.......😒

Blitz: There are things in this world that we will never understand, UNDERSTAND.

Millie: *lays in front of Ronaldo* kill me

-----------

Loona: I'm not burning 200 owls for you

Blitz: I could fire you! I'd never. But I could! *Runs away crying*

------------

Blitz: I'm Bethany Ghostfucker idiot

Ronaldo: sure you're not like-i dunno some church girl? Bethany is...very churchy name. But you lead Ghostfuckers? Really?

Blitz: I- yes! Do you not see the vibrator spectrometer in my hand!

Ronaldo: Is that what that is? I thought it was your holy wand

Blitz: 🤨

-------------

Millie: Blitz come back to reality, ghosts aren't real!

Blitz: Then go in the basement Millie.

Millie:.....

Blitz: Go on. Get down there.

-------------

Blitz: YEAH FUCK HOTELS!!!

*Across hell*

Charlie: *pauses in the middle of eating a sugar cookie* I feel a disturbance

Vaggie: What?

Charlie: Oh....nothing....

[lifea16]

I am running out of notes to name these lol. More Incorrect quotes if you couldn't tell

Stolas, holding out a cookie for Blitz: Look! This ones a heart, that’s how I feel about you! Blitz: *Ugly crying* Stolas, holding out another cookie for Stella: This ones like Michigan, that’s how I feel about you! Stella, throwing their hands in the air: What does that mean?! --- Blitz: I have one foot in the grave but in a kind of fun flirty way, the way one might slip on a fishnet stocking. --- Moxxie: But seriously, what is the real plan here that has to do with not fucking around? Blitz: There is no plan that does not involve fucking around. But we will make sure all of our fucking around will be applied in a constructive direction. --- Millie: Do you feel any better? Moxxie: I feel much better now that you here with me. Blitz walks in Moxxie: I feel half better. --- Loona: Welcome to Fucking Applebees, do you want apples or bees? IMP client: Bees? Loona: THEY HAVE SELECTED THE BEES! IMP client: Wait- Blitz approaches, shaking a jar of bees menacingly --- Moxxie: I never understood why people cared so much about their dumb friends until I got a dumb friend myself. Moxxie: Picks up Blitz Moxxie: I’ve only befriended Blitz for a day and a half, but if anything happened to him I would kill everyone in this room and then my self. --- Blitz: You are now one day closer to eating your next plate of nachos. Millie: That's the most hopeful thing I've ever heard. Moxxie: But what if I die tomorrow and never eat any nachos? Blitz: Then tomorrow is nacho lucky day. --- Stolas: Blitz is playing hard to get. Stolas: Little does he know, I'm a master at playing hard to get rid of. --- Loona: So are you gonna explain how the hell you crashed the van? Blitz: Well we were driving and there was a deer in the road, so I said "Stolas, deer!" Loona: …And what did Stolas do? Blitz: …He said "Yes, Honey?"

[pain-in-the-riri]

Fanfiction Author Interview Game

Thank you for the tag @moonheavens!

More questions under the cut hehehe

How many works do you have on AO3?

10 public ones and 3 hidden ones 🤫

What's your total AO3 word count?

173,835

Your top 5 stories by kudos/likes:

It's Automatic - Our Flag Means Death Gentlebeard oneshot that started as a twitter fic where Ed is a construction worker that catcalls Stede on his way to work hehehe it's really cute imo and a really fast read since it's just a handful of tweets!

Boned, Rolled and Tied - Another OFMD fic! Gentlebeard, a collab with @beabonnet and a Gentlebeard retelling of I Married an Axe Murderer, sooo fun to write lmaooo still a wip

Hell Will Wait - Wolfstar fic where Sirius gets out of Azkaban about 5 years and some change after being arrested, 37k get-together fic where Sirius and Remus have to work through all of their conflicting feelings but in the end are always there for each other 🥺 my boys i really love this one

Same Old Fire - Another Wolfstar get-together oneshot that takes place during the first war, when Sirius tracks Remus down at his parent's house after he disappears for several months for a mission directly after swerving on him smh....another fave hehehe. Also my first fic to be podficced!!!

Forget That Guy - Oneshot written for a Conan Gray marauders fic fest (although I loved it so much that I have at least one follow-up planned, maybe two). Sirius gets cheated on at a club and takes it out sexy-style on the hot sad bartender that coincidentally also just got broken up with LOL

Do you respond to comments?

Yes, I do my best! Sometimes I miss one or two in my notifs but when I notice I forgot to respond I'll respond hehe

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

Probably Forget That Guy >:)

Although a couple of my OFMD fics have ambiguous endings but I haven't published the ends of those ones yet LOL

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

Most of them have pretty happy endings! But probably Hell Will Wait hehehe

Do you write crossovers?

I never have

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

If I have, it hasn't gotten back to me hahaha. One person wrote that my fic was "meh" in the bookmarks though, fuck that person 🖕you can think it's meh if you want but fic is like when someone brings a cake to a party, you don't tell your friend their homemade cake is meh, you politely avoid eating it if you don't like it and go eat the cookies someone else brought lmfao

Do you write smut?

yes, most of my fics have smut in them LOL

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I hope not 😩

Have you ever had a fic translated?

nah

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yeah, Boned, Rolled and Tied!

What's your all-time favorite ship?

Wolfstar :)))))

also...hamlet and horatio, guildenstern and rozencrantz even though they're the same person, vash and wolfwood 😩, xena and gabrielle!!!!!!!! Gideon and Harrowhark!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Harrow and Ianthe!!!!!!!!!! (toxic lesbians come to me)

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

Prob that OFMD fic I mentioned earlier, the first one I wrote for the fandom. Not sure if I'll ever go back to it

What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm really good at dialogue! And I hope I'm good at characterization hahaha

What are your writing weaknesses?

Endings 😩 which is why I started plotting out endings first!

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I love it! I haven't done it before but it's really fun, especially when I feel extra smart for being able to read it hahaha

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?

Vash/Wolfwood!!!!!! Vashwood, one of my first OTPs!!!!!!!! Also Vash/Wolfwood/Meryl/Milly, just that entire fuckin polycule hahahaha I love them soooooo fucking much

What's your favorite fic you've written?

I will always love Hell Will Wait that thing flowed out of me like water in the span of one week. 37k words in one week!!!!! I have never been able to match the pace hahahaha Also huge fan of my most recent oneshot, Carrot or Stick, where Sirius and Remus argue themselves into the sack and then continue arguing in the sack. The arguments are not mean-spirited, and I love writing them bickering!

Tagging: @futurequibblerjournalist @swifty-fox @chlobliviate @quillkiller

[mavisgarygotsober]

I got Millie and I a turkey tenderloin, stuffing, mac and cheese, mashed potatoes, and $12 cookies for Thursday. Most of it is premade because cooking a holiday meal for one makes me want to go to sleep. Millie is my cat for reference. She won’t actually be eating the meal but it’s better than saying it’s just for me🤷🏼‍♀️ I should be doing schoolwork but I’m too depressed. I’m going to see my dr Wednesday morning because my antidepressants aren’t helping anymore . I’m going to try and nap then maybe I’ll make a snack plate. I got paper plates that have different slots to do my snack trays with. I made my coffee at home this morning. I’ll consider that a win.

[aurorialwolf]

more redacted ocs!! Aria's roommates edition

I have a redacted oc named Aria Aisling, a dreamwalker! She has 5 roommates, one of whom has been featured in the audios I've voiced of her, and this is her rankings of them! All have been made with picrew, BUT I did have to edit a couple of them slightly to get the appearances right.

Cassie, bear shifter She's the sweetest out of all Aria's roommates, and bakes cookies for all the roommates at least once a month! She's maybeee not the quickest on the uptake as the others, but she makes up for it with her kindness and (literal) strength! She's probably Aria's favourite, not that she'd admit it.

Salvia, vampire of the House of Baz. She's about 52, and was turned when she was 25. She is almost tied with Cassie for Aria's favourite, but is ranked at 2nd just because. She's the best cook in the house, and makes most of the dinners. Kayli is also one of the people who cooks dinner, but she seems to have differing tastes as she does not eat like the others do (Salvia still eats human food but Kayli rarely ever does). Salvia is from Ireland, and emigrated to the US in 2002, at the behest of her (vampire clan's) queen. Note: Aria's listener, "Dreamer", is a volunteer blood source for the Dahlian members of the House of Baz, so Salvia knows them well.

Amelia, sonal energetic She's the loudest out of all of them, but mostly just by accident, since her powers sometimes come through when she's especially excited. She's probably exactly in the middle of Aria's rankings of her roommates.

Millie, stealth She's the quietest of all of them, and keeps to herself. Sometimes, everyone assumes she isn't even home, until they bump into her cloaking in the kitchen. She's about on par with Aria in terms of how reclusive she is. Aria doesn't have particularly strong feelings towards her, but likes Amelia a little more, so she's ranked 4th. One time she helped Aria redye her hair, though, so she could easily rank 3rd as well.

Kayli, serenity daemon She has been coalesced now for 56 years, and is currently doing some extra daemon studies at DAMN. She is the most overbearing in terms of protectiveness when it comes to Aria and the other roommates, but she means well. She is probably Aria's least favourite roommate, simply because she interrupts her dreamscapes too often.

So yeah!! That's all of them :D I'll gladly provide the picrew links if anyone wants them, but keep in mind I had to edit Kayli and Millie, so Kayli's serenity horns and Millie's blue streaks aren't in the picrews! I'm working on Aria's 4th audio right now, so it should be out next weekend at the latest!

[tea-the-not-understanding]

Greetings to the person who found my blog.

Welcome, let me introduce myself first before explaining the rules. My name is Tea, it the name that many people referred to call me and pretty simple name to remember. I am basically 18+ and bisexual, He/Him/They/Them.

This blog is all about me having fun with art, drawing and posting to share with you all. It also one of my passions to entertain others but I have some common rules that you must follows.

I accepts

Art trades ( I do love to do trades but please do not go overboard with it. )

Collabs ( I like to share some ideas and do art collabs, etc etc.. )

Roleplay ( Roleplay is what I love to do but it have to be at least appropriate. no 18+ or NSFW because there's minors, but angst is allowed. )

Suggestions ( You can suggest or give me idea what to draw. But for now, Cookie run fandoms, it can be others but I'll reconsidered about it. )

You can send asks to asks about the characters that I am open in this blog. Please keep it appropriate.

What I do NOT accept

Please for the love of god do not send me feet pics. ( I am too done and exhaust from it already )

Asks or Request me to draw NSFW. (There's minor in this blog, I know it. And if you want, it do not come in for free. )

Request to draw your oc/characters. ( I only do it for friends and mutual. If you really want, then considering commission me for it. )( And also, asking me to be your friend first and tell me to draw your oc will get you banned instanly. )

And finally, common sense thing that you must know. No Proshipper, Incest, Homophobic, Racial, Slurs, other bad shit, etc...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Now that you have read the rules. I can introduce you to the character that I am open to answers to.

Most of you might be here to ask about Electric eel cookie but there's more then just Electric eel too. Such as Angst au with Longan and Millie, Capsaicin and Prune juice and my oc's/Characters

update/edit. I'll add characters where you can asks or know what characters I own so you can asks/roleplay with

OC

Clockwork cookie : little shit who control time

Timeless cookie : little shit who control time 2

Vanilla Extract cookie : Someone please put him to sleep for once.

Melted fruitcake cookie : He eat too much sometimes.

Forest fire cookie : your pride is too important apparently.

Ancient death thorn cookie : What the fuck are you?

Chai tea cookie : Stop adopting chickens goddammit.

Skullcap Sapphire Butter cookie : LITTLE SHIT NUMBER 1

Cinnamon dust cookie : a bean that need someone to burn some houses for him sometime.

Flaming dust cookie : LITTLE SHIT NUMBER 2

Vortex tea cookie : Someone put him to sleep too.

Ribbon eel cookie : Wake up, you sleep too much.

Rangoon cookie : Stop asking her for nudes you sick fucks.

Guarana cookie : Kinda a little shit?

Mythical salt cookie : Go to horny jail.

Space dust cookie : Your the moon son? how? The moon is still a virgin-

Luna/Moon cookie : introvert to the core.

Little Moon : Eh? What do you want?

SONA

Shooting star : Idiot number 1

Buh : buh

Toxic : the only tea cup for a head character btw

Icing cookie : BIGGEST LITTLE SHIT

Melatonin cookie : don't make him cry...

Shimp / shimp cookie : every body favorite boi!

Here are some option link that You can open to see on the character to asks.

And to those who want to read the side story of the Angst au capsaicin and prune juice. Here's the link as well or you can just click the angst au tag in my blog and you'll find them too.

Anyways, hope you have fun and enjoy your time in my blog. ^^

[h3lled]

@isforever sent , ❛  eat this, it's a new cookie recipe i've tried.  ❜ - moxxie @ millie

“ ooooooh! ”  wide  set  eyes  and  beaming  smile  breaks  across  her  features.  moxxie  had  never  needed  to  do  more  than  ask  to  get  her  to  try  something  ,  but  his  sinsmas  cookies  had  always  been  one  of  her  favorites.  bringing  back  a  feeling  of  a  nostalgia  she  had  never  been  able  to  pinpoint.  “ what’d  y’  do  differently ,  hon? ”  without  hesitating  ,  the  question  had  been  asked  through  a  series  of  rough  bites.  chomping  down  ,  while  also  making  sure  not  to  pull  a  blitzø  and  swallow  it  whole.  she’d  wanted  to  give  the  first  one  a  real  taste.  “ it’s  still  real  delicious.  they  always  are.  but  this  …  this  tastes  kinda  special! ”

[scolek]

tendiesquest: don & millie's

so, as you know, tendiesquest is my journey to go to all the different fast food places in my area that have chicken tenders. the thing is, some of those fast food places are only in my area. so don't fret that you havent heard of this one. i think there's like ten of them.

i was actually on my way to kfc when i saw this one, because i forgot it was there, but i. when i tell you i hit my turn signal without a second thought.

so, the food: while occasionally you will get a complimentary biscuit or something like at popeyes, i was surprised that this was one of those places. i was at the first window, gave the girl my card, and then she handed the card back with my receipt and a cookie! a chocolate chip cookie. it was okay. nothing to write home about, but it was nice. and what a fun surprise!

i was waiting at the second window for a while, long enough to eat the whole cookie, and while i was there, i keep looking at a billboard. for the ramen place i talked about a couple days ago with all the red flags. is it a taunt or a sign?

the fries. are. fucking amazing. theyre your standard fast food fries, on the thinner side like mcds. but they've got whatever culvers is doing to their fries but theyre doing more of it. it's amazing.

the chicken tenders were near some pickles at some point. its not affecting the taste but i can smell it. as for the taste. its also nothing to write home about. minimally seasoned, but the breading is really nice!

i think its between b and a. im rating the tendies specifically, so the bomb ass fries dont actually get factored in. but actually. hmm. this is really like. i dont want to add pluses and minuses into the tiers, and these are tiers, there is an s. yeah, A. havent knocked it out of the park, but didnt do anything wrong, either. except the faint smell of pickles.

[chickensarentcheap]

Lost and Found -Chapter 13

Fandom: Extraction

Pairing: Tyler Rake and Esme Drummond (established OFC. Although you do not need to read the others to understand this one)

Warnings:  profanity

Tagging: @tragiclyhip @secretaryunpaid @youflickedtooharddamnit @munstysmind @thesirenrealm @asirensrage @residentdormouse @ninjasawakenedmystar @karimac @starryeyes2000 @timbradfordsboot @ocappreciationtag @occommunity @arrthurpendragon​

Link to Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43179357/chapters/120781585

​My tag list is OPEN. Just give me a shout if you’d like to added :)

******

“Which one is your favourite?” Millie inquires, as they sit side by side in a corner booth; tucked away from the breakfast rush that’s invaded The Continental’s dining area. “Pancakes, waffles, or French Toast?”

Tyler rifles through the plastic container of crayons open in front of him, selecting a blue and a red, then returning to the sheet of paper spread across the table. “Pancakes.”

“Me too! With lots of butter and syrup! But sometimes, I’ll put strawberry jam on them. Have you ever had that? It’s delish.”

“I haven’t. Guess it’s something I’ll have to try.”

“Maybe when we’re at your house, we can make pancakes together. Momma and I do that every Sunday morning. I get to stand on a chair and help. Mom ALWAYS lets me stir the batter. But the pancakes are never very good ‘cause she isn’t the best cook in the world and…”

“Hey!” Esme objects, and reaches across the table to playfully tug on one of her daughter’s pigtails. “I am sitting right here.”

“I’m sorry, mom. I love you. Bunches. But you can’t cook for shit.”

“I’ve somehow managed to keep you alive for four years, haven’t I? My food can’t be THAT bad.”

“I mean, it’s not horrible. But it’s not great either. I can STILL eat it. Just sometimes I have to pretend it tastes like something else. So I CAN get it down.”

“You’re a savage, you know that.”

“I woke up today and chose violence.”

“How about choosing NOT to throw me under the bus?”

“You always tell me that honesty is the best policy. And I was just being honest, so…” She sips at her chocolate milk and then addresses Tyler once more. “Momma is a really awesome baker though! She always makes my birthday cakes and sends cupcakes or cake pops to school with me so my class can have some goodies too! She bakes all kinds of awesome stuff. Brownies and cookies and pies. And these really yummy things made with mushed-up frosted flakes and chocolate and marshmallows. She even sells her stuff sometimes. At the market near our old place.”

“We used to live in Queens,” Esme explains, when Tyler looks to her for clarification. “We had an apartment there. A walk up in an old brownstone. There’s a little pop-up market every Saturday. I would spend the better part of a week baking and then Millie and I would go to the market on the weekend and make some money. We don’t do it as much anymore now that we live…LIVED…in Manhattan.”

“It was a lot of fun! I loved going to the market,” Millie says. “‘Cause when momma sold all her stuff, we’d walk around and she’d buy me all kinds of goodies that other people were selling. Treaties and stuff. This was this lady there that made dresses and hats and even dolls. She made me Posie for my third birthday. See…” Reaching, for the doll that rests between her and the wall, the four-year-old proudly places it on the tabletop. A Holly Hobby inspired creation; sandy blond hair made from yarn, a purple and pink paisley dress and matching hat, and pink vinyl shoes.. “...this is Posie. Momma had her made to look just like me.”

Tyler shows the doll his full attention; Millie anxiously awaiting his admiration and praise. “She’s beautiful. Just like you. Pink and purple are your favourite colours?”

“They’re my top two. But I like other colours, too. Blue and green and orange. And camo. I know that’s not a colour, but I really like it. Especially the one that makes you look like GI Joe.”

“You know who GI Joe is?”

“Yup. I have a whole box full of them! Momma got them at the secondhand place.” Her smile diminishes and her eyes darken; lips forming a pout. “But they didn’t get brought with us. When we had to leave the house. I wish we could go and get them. And some of my other stuff. Auntie Nik says we can’t; ‘cause the bad guys will find us there. But I really miss my stuff.”

“Maybe we can get Uncle Yaz to go and get some of your stuff,” Esme suggests. “He can take a couple of people with him to make sure he doesn’t get hurt. But we can’t bring EVERYTHING, baby. I wish we could.”

“And if we can’t bring it, we’ll get it for you,” Tyler adds. “When we get wherever we’re going. Maybe you can make a list? Of all the stuff you miss and you really want? Can you do that for me? Because I don’t know much about little girls and what they like.”

“I can do that. I like all kinds of stuff. Girl stuff, boy stuff. Momma says I can play with whatever toys I want and that it’s stupid that society puts labels on things like toys and clothes.”

“Your mum’s a very smart lady.”

“Momma always says that I’m the Millie I’m supposed to be. That the things I like and make me happy are part of me. Part of my personality. And no one should take those away from me.”

“No. They shouldn’t.”

“And she says to never let anyone dull my sparkle, right mom?”

“I don’t think anyone ever could, sweet pea. You’ve got way too much sparkle for anyone to take away. And if they tried and I caught them doing it…”

“You’d punch them in the face!”

“Well I might not resort to violence, but…”

“Alessio? That guy momma was gonna marry? He always complained about my sparkle. He didn’t call it THAT, but he always bitched and moaned about my clothes and how loud I am and how much I love to sing and dance. And you know what he did one day? He threw out my shoes! My favourite ones!”

“She’s been wearing those same Spiderman sandals since she was almost three,” Esme tells Tyler. “I always buy a couple pairs at a time; one a bit bigger for when she sizes up.”

“I LOVE these shoes!” Millie enthuses. “They’re comfy and they’re cute and they light up. Alessio didn’t like them. He said they were for boys! But momma told him it didn’t matter. That girls love superheroes too! And I can wear whatever I want! And you know what he did? The big, fat jerk! He waited until momma and I were asleep and he threw my shoes out! I couldn’t find them in the morning and I was really sad! I cried. A lot. They were my favourite. They fit just right.”

Esme reaches for one of the carafes in the middle of the table, pouring herself a second cup of tea. “And what happened next? When momma found out what Alessio did?”

“You went and bought me two new pairs. And told Alessio to never pull that kind of shit ever again!”

Tyler grins. Esme’s never been afraid to speak her mind; never threatened or intimidated no matter how big and bad her opponent is. He’d learned that the hard way; finding himself the target of her ire in Dhaka. When he’d had the nerve to ‘pull rank’ and ‘man-splain’. “Your mumma takes good care of you, huh?”

“ She doesn’t let anyone mess with me. And if they try? She gets really mad. And she doesn’t back down. She’s little, but I bet she could kick some serious ass!”

“Oh, I know she could. I’ve seen it. What she gets like when she’s angry. Or she’s trying to protect the people she loves. She’s a good mumma?”

“Best mumma ever! We do a lot of cool stuff together. We go for manis and pedis, we go to the library to look for books and play in the kids’ section. We go to museums and the movies. And you know what my favourite thing is? When we go to Central Park. We always take a picnic. And we sit by the fountain and go for a walk and go and feed the ducks. That’s the best part. I love the ducks. Do you have ducks in Australia?”

“We do. We even have some rare ones you can’t find anywhere else in the world.”

“Do you think maybe you could take me to see them? If we go to your house? I’d really like to see the ducks. And feed them. Do you think we could?”

“I think we could arrange something, yeah. And we can go to the zoo. Feed some joeys, see some koalas. Maybe hold one. I don’t think your mumma would mind. If we did stuff like that.”

“Can we, mumma? Please? Can we go to the zoo? I want to feed the joeys and hold a koala! Can we go there?”

“I definitely think we could do that.” Esme returns Tyler’s smile from across the table, and then briefly and inconspicuously lays her hand on top of his. Giving it a light, loving squeeze before she runs her nails along the length of his fingers.

She enjoys this quiet, unassuming closeness. An intimacy that’s pure and beautiful and reserved solely for each other. The glances exchanged, their feet touching under the table, their hands in close enough proximity to each other they often come in contact. It’s the honeymoon stage; that blissful, relaxed contentment that comes with getting to know someone and falling head over heels in love. But there’s an extra layer to their story; two people who had found acceptance and solace in one another during the most difficult and stressful of times and somehow survived the unimaginable. Dhaka had created a powerful bond between them; one that not even The High Table had managed to erase. Now they’ve started down a new path; friends and lovers who managed to find their way back to each other. And are now caught up in a whirlwind of rediscovery.

When the waitress departs after refilling drinks and taking orders, Millie and Tyler fall into a companionable silence; both concentrating on their ‘masterpieces’. It’s quite the juxtaposition compared to their surroundings and the original reason for his visit to New York; surrounded by men and women engrossed in the criminal world yet somehow managing to create this comfortable, happy space. This powerful and intimidating man with his scars and tattoos and his demons devoting his full attention to the little girl beside him; Millie occasionally glancing at him with a mixture of fascination and pure, unadulterated affection. A connection established since the moment they’d laid eyes on each other the day before; Tyler shocked and overwhelmed by the news that he was a father again and Millie awed and intrigued by the ‘giant’ that loomed over her. And she’s become incredibly attached to him in such a short period of time; putting all of her faith and trust into him and believing his promise to keep her and momma safe from the bad guys.

In return, he’s indulged every one of her whims since that initial hug only forty minutes ago. One of those enormous, strong hands swallowing her much tinier, fragile one when she reached for him; chattering away as she skipped happily alongside him as they headed for the elevator. Immediately obliging when she asked to be carried on his shoulders; giggling as she was lifted high into the air and then wrapping both arms around his neck and resting her chin on the top of his head. And he didn’t blink an eye when she abandoned her original seat at the booth in favour of climbing up next to him. Joining her in drawing and colouring and patiently answering all of her questions about Australia, allowing her to creep closer and closer to him until she eventually settled upon his thigh.

Millie is currently perched upon her knees with both arms wrapped around one of his biceps; quietly and intently watching the drawing that he works so diligently on. Those big hands with all their scars and calluses and misshapen knuckles and their ability to take a life creating something beautiful and ‘just for her’. It’s a side of him even Esme has never seen before; a loving and devoted father that willingly ignores societal norms in order to make his little one happy.

She had seen the potential inside of him during those five days in Dhaka; the seemingly fearless mercenary lowering his guard and showing her all his broken and aching parts. A grief-stricken and guilt laden man; willingly putting his own life on the line to save others not because of the money involved, but as repentance for the mistakes he’d made. There’d been a gentleness to him that she’d never experienced with another man. The way he’d cradle her face in his palms when he kissed her, that slow, adoring way his eyes would search every inch of her face. the tenderness in his fingertips when he’d smooth hair away from her cheeks and tuck loose strands behind her ears. There were layers to him that he’d never allowed another to explore; instead choosing to hide behind all of his rough and tattered edges and his strong, intimidating physique. But he’d granted her access to even the deepest and darkest of places; spilling secrets and regrets and allowing himself to be vulnerable. He hadn’t been a horrible husband or father by any stretch of the imagination. What he had been was damaged and traumatized; a lifetime of nightmarish circumstances that had made it impossible for him to deal with the reality of his son’s illness and impending death.

“Everyone deserves a second chance,” she had said, when he’d asked her why she was being so kind. So understanding. Why didn’t she see him as the monster that everyone painted him as? He killed people for a living, after all. He’d abandoned his child when he’d needed his father the most. How could she NOT look at him with pure and utter disgust?

*****

She watches him with that second chance now; nursing a cup of tea as she muses on how alike father and daughter truly are. The exact same colour and texture of hair, the long limbs and impossibly big hands and feet, those brilliant blue eyes that can grow so dark and stormy when frustration or anger settle in. And how, while dedicated to a task, those eyes narrow; intently focused with their lips slightly parted and their brows furrowed.

“You are soooo good!” Millie gushes, as she peers down at the paper. “I want to draw like that! I’m alright at it, but I’m not great or anything.”

“You’re only four. You have lots of time to get better at it.”

“You don’t look like the type that would be an artist.”

“No? What type do I look like?”

“The type that kicks serious, big time ass!”

“Well, I do THAT too. I do lots of things, actually. I have lots of different skills.” A grin tugging at the corners of his mouth, he shoots Esme a wink. “Just ask your mum.”

Eyes widening, Esme directs a kick to his shin.

“You know what I don’t understand?” Millie inquires, oblivious to the behaviour of the others at the table. “I don’t understand how you and momma met. How you became friends. If momma was living here and you were living in Australia, how’d you even meet?”

“Tyler and I were both working for Auntie Nik,” Esme explains, flashing the waitress an appreciative smile as she replaces empty carafes with full, fresh ones. “And she needed us to help her find someone.”

“Where’d you have to find them?”

“Somewhere far away. In a place called Bangladesh.”

“Where’s that?”

“Far, far away. On the other side of the world.”

“Was it a boy or girl?”

“A boy.” Tyler reaches for his coffee. “A teenager.”

“What was his name?”

“You ask a lot of questions.”

“You have to set the scene. I need to know details.”

“His name was Ovi.” Esme begins tidying the table; dropping crayons back into their carrying case; a retro metal Transformers lunch box Millie had spied in a second-hand store and just had to have.

“Why did he need to be found, momma? What happened to him?”

“Some bad people took him. And didn’t want to give him back unless they were paid a lot of money.”

“Why did the bad people take him?”

“Because his dad was a bad person, too. And they wanted to cause trouble with him.”

“But WHY? Just to be mean?”

“It’s a long story. And not one for little ears. They took Ovi because they wanted to hurt his dad. Who was just as bad of a person as they were. And when no one could find where Ovi was, Auntie Nik got called into things.”

“And she asked you and Tyler to help? Why you guys?”

“Because I find people. I go places and ask all kinds of questions and track them down. And then I give guys like Tyler that information and he goes and rescues them. Remember what I told you? About teamwork?”

‘Teamwork is dream work!”

“Exactly. And because these people were so bad, I needed to have someone keep an eye on me. So I wouldn’t get hurt.”

Completely invested and desperate for more information, Millie lifts up Tyler’s arm and slips under it. Climbing into his lap, she places a hand on his cheek and turns his face towards her. “You were momma’s bodyguard then too?”

“I was. And you know what? It was the hardest job I’ve ever had. Because your mum? She is stubborn as hell. She refused to listen to a word I said. I almost told her to find her own way home and left her there.”

“It wasn’t that I didn’t listen to you,” Esme argues. “I just thought you thought what you were saying was…how do I put this gently…stupid.”

“Excuse me?”

“That and I was in my ‘I won’t let any man tell me what to do’ stage,” she chides, and shoots him a playful wink. “You weren’t getting away with it. And it didn’t matter how hot you were.”

“Were? Past tense? WERE? First, you call me fat and now you’re saying I’m ugly?”

“Momma!” Millie gasps in horror. “You called Tyler fat?! That’s not nice. You’re not supposed to say things like that about people! I mean, I know he’s a little chubby, but…”

“Chubby?” He lightly pinches the four-year-old’s sides. “Whose side are you on anyway? Calling me chubby.”

“I’m on your side! I am! I really am! But…”

Millie squeals when he tickles her and then dissolves into hysterics; eyes closing and her entire body arching against him when his fingers dig lightly into her stomach. Her laughter travelling throughout the restaurant and drawing attention; a handful of disapproving frowns and whispers mixed in with amused eyes and broad smiles. The first child to ever need protection within The Continental’s walls, many of the staff and clientele remember her as an infant; watching that blue-eyed, chubby-cheeked little girl go from a newborn in her mother’s arms to a baby just weeks shy of her first birthday. When the dust had cleared and it was safe to finally leave, they’d moved to Queens; into a quaint and cozy two-bedroom apartment that Nik had furnished and paid the first year's rent on. After that, they’d had no reason to return to The Continental. Extra money earned doing intel work from home while Esme devoted everything she had to raising her daughter and making sure she was loved and provided for.

She’d spent years longing to be a mother, and Mark’s abuse and the eventual disintegration of her marriage had left her incredibly jaded and wary of ever trusting a man again. She had tried to convince herself that perhaps it was just the way things were meant to be; she wasn’t destined to have a child and instead would throw herself into her work and find contentment and fulfilment in the few friendships she managed to maintain. Yet there’d always been an emptiness and a longing she couldn’t quite explain; a need for a different life in a different place, surrounded by different people. And she’d been so close to breaking free. Setting a firm ‘six-month exit strategy’; giving it half a year before moving to Scotland and living with a long-lost cousin until she was able to get on her feet.

And then Nik had called, offering her the Dhaka job.

It had been too good to resist. A massive payday and an assurance from Nik that once it was over, she was officially ‘off the books’. There’d be no paper trail of her ever connected to Nik’s business; staying in touch as ‘friends only’ and perhaps offering the occasional consultation over the phone or through a video chat. She was looking forward to no longer being part of that world; using the money she was paid to travel the globe and create experiences and memories before settling down in Scotland. Perhaps once there she’d ‘find herself’; discover a new profession that would give her the same feeling of accomplishment. It had been illegal and dishonest work, but it HAD come with one major benefit; able to dole out karma and see those who deserved it meet their often bloody and brutal demise.

She never did get to travel.

Instead, her entire life changed the second she walked into the rundown shack in the middle of the Australian outback.

“I gotta chubby tummy too!” Millie announces, as she once more settles herself on Tyler’s lap and then pulls up the bottom of her t-shirt. “I also have an outtie! See!”

Grinning, Esme lifts her mug to her lips. “She’s very proud of her belly button. She had an umbilical hernia when she was a baby and had to have surgery for it. When she was still a wee little thing. That’s her souvenir from it.”

“All my friends are jealous! None of them have outties. I tell them that I’m special. Like a unicorn. ‘Cause I got something different.”

“You are,” Esme agrees, and reaches across the table to sweep Millie’s bangs from her forehead. “You are very, very, VERY special. More than you will ever know.”

She desperately wants to add: “And your daddy and I love you so very much” but manages to hold it back. It’s way too soon; only twenty-four hours since Tyler had discovered Millie’s existence and less than three days since the four-year-old’s entire world had been turned upside down. While full of smiles and giggles and hilarious chatter throughout the day, the trauma comes out to play at night. Plagued by uncharacteristic, aggressive meltdowns before bed and a newfound fear of the dark, reverting back to sucking her thumb as a form of comforting and self-soothing, and suffering from horrible nightmares that tear her from rest and cause her to vomit and wet the bed. She’s been through way too much for such a little thing; hearing and seeing things that not even adults should be subjected to. With no way of telling what another huge event would do to her, it’s best to keep Tyler’s true identity a secret for now. At least until the aftereffects of four nights ago begin to weaken.

It hurts to have to keep lying. For four years she’s kept Millie’s existence a secret out of pure selfishness and stupidity; afraid of rejection and unable to handle the mere thought…never mind the sight… of him being with anyone else. Choosing instead to remain hidden and off the grid; convincing herself that she’d only ruin his life if she was to suddenly resurface with a child in tow. Deep down she was aware of just how wrong she was; even hurt and angry, Tyler would never turn away his daughter. Even if they couldn’t get along, he would still want to be in Millie’s life. He’d want to be present and active and have a say and a helping hand in how she was raised. While Esme had told herself that staying silent was better for everyone involved, the truth was that it was only better for her. A way of protecting her heart.

She knows it stings. Whenever Millie calls him by his first name. She can see that little wince that captures his mouth and the pain that darkens his eyes. He’s already missed so much of her life and not being seen and known as ‘dad’ only adds insult to injury. But she also knows that no matter how pained he may be and how desperate he is for the truth to be known, he’d never do anything to hurt Millie or jeopardize her well-being.

Even if it means putting his on the back burner.

It’s a beautiful thing to witness. That big, strapping man already so attentive and adoring. Protective. All that faith she had and all that potential she saw five years ago now playing out before her eyes. The infinite amount of patience that he possesses; allowing Millie to ask a seemingly endless string of questions involving how he met her mother, what it’s like living in Australia, and if she’ll get eaten by a shark if they go to the beach. Always having the perfect answers for her; ones that light up her eyes and make her giggle and feel completely safe and content in his presence. Not blinking an eye when tiny fingers explore the calluses on his palms and his long busted up knuckles; staying away from any talk about the job and telling tales instead of sports injuries and incidents while rock climbing or hiking or surfing. And not appearing bothered when she inquires about his collection of scars; sparing her the more horrific details and only alluding to mishaps while with the military and while fighting ‘bad guys'.``

“Momma,” Millie leans across the table and lightly taps a hand against Esme’s cheek. “You’re doing it again.”

“Doing what, sweet pea?”

“Looking like you’re gonna cry. What’s wrong? Why tears? Why are you sad?”

“I’m not sad,” Esme promises, then leans forward and rests a hand on the back of the four-year-old’s head. Giving her a reassuring smile before pressing a kiss to her brow. “I’m happy. So very, very, VERY happy.”

****

They find Nik and Abuela waiting outside the suite door when they return; the latter anxiously pacing the thick, plush carpet. And it’s Nik that approaches them; her brow furrowed and lips set in a thin, stern line.

“We’ve got a problem.”

Tyler frowns. “I don’t like hearing that.”

“I don’t like saying it.”

“How big is this problem?”

“I’d say about six one, two hundred pounds. Alessio is here.”

“How the hell did he get in here? I thought this place was secure. I thought one of the rules was that no one could come and cause shit. Conduct business under their roof.”

“He says he’s not here to cause problems. Or do any business. He just wants to talk. With Esme.”

“Tell him to go away,” Millie pipes up from her perch upon Tyler’s shoulders. “Momma is off limits! Tell him that, Auntie Nik. Tell that asshole to f…”

“Amelia…” Esme gently scolds, then turns to Nik. “Talk about what? I think everything that happened last night spoke for itself. His family broke into my house and tried to kill me. And Millie. A little kid. If he thinks I have anything to say…”

“He’s a dickhead!” Millie declares. “Tell him momma has a new boyfriend. Who is really big and strong and will rip his head off and shove it up his…”

“Let me take her,” Abuela suggests, and moves towards Tyler. “We can go and hide in her room and watch a movie or we can make crafts. Maybe go downstairs for a swim. Or we can…”

“No!” The four-year-old protests, wrapping her legs tightly around Tyler’s neck and her arms around his head when the ‘nanny’ reaches for her. “I don’t want to go in there! I don’t want to see him!”

“He’s not going to leave,” Nik addresses Tyler and Esme. “He’s pretty adamant about that. And it’s not like we can force him. If we even put our hands on him, we’ll be leaving this place in body bags. And he knows that. He knows we can’t do a damn thing.”

Tyler sighs. “I mean, one bright spot is neither can he. He goes against the High Table rules and he knows he’s fucked. Not even his family and their connections can save him from them. But wanting to talk to Esme? About what?”

“About what went down the other night I guess. He feels that he’d owed an explanation. That he put eight months into the relationship and everything turned out to be a complete lie. He’s pissed. Hurt. I guess he has a lot to vent about.”

“Tell him to go to a fucking therapist. Esme doesn’t owe him a damn thing. His family tried to KILL HER. No amount of talking is going to change that.”

“What harm is there in hearing him out? If he won’t leave and we can’t make him leave…”

“I don’t wanna go in there,” Millie sobs. “I don’t want to see him. I don’t like him. He’s mean. Don’t make me go in there. Don’t…”

Gently prying her arms apart and untangling her legs from around his neck, Tyler reaches up and carefully lifts the little one off his shoulders. Briefly settling her on his hip before placing her on the ground, then kneeling in front of her and cradling her face in his palms.

“Don’t cry.” He uses his thumbs to clear away the tears that sparkle upon her cheeks. “There’s no reason to cry. Everything is fine. You’re okay.”

“I don’t like him.”

“I know. I know he was mean to your mum. I bet he was mean to you sometimes too, yeah?”

“He threw out my shoes.”

“And that’s bad enough, right? There were other times, too? When he was mean to you?”

Millie nods. “He didn’t like me. He said I was too loud. That I talk too much. And make too much noise. That little kids need to be seen and not heard. He wanted momma to send me to a special school. Where kids stay over instead of coming home. But momma told him to go and ‘get fucked’. She always told him where to go. When he said mean things to me. She doesn’t let anyone hurt me.”

“That’s because she’s an awesome mumma. But he can’t hurt you. Not here. Not with me and Auntie Nik and Abuela here. You’ve got a lot of people that love you. Who will do anything to keep you safe. You trust me?”

“I trust you.”

“I need you to do me a favour. I need you to go inside with Abuela. I want you to do everything she says, okay? You go in your room and you watch a movie or you make some crafts or find something else to keep you busy. Just for a little while.”

“Just for a bit?”

“Just until I finish talking with your mum and Auntie Nik. Then I’ll come and get you.”

“Promise?”

“Promise. Maybe you can even do me up one of those bracelets. So I can add it to my collection. Maybe even make yourself and mumma some too. We can all match.”

“I’ll do yours in boy colours. So you don’t get teased. But you do promise, right? That you’ll come and get me?”

“As soon as I’m done out there. It won’t be long. I just need a chance to talk some things over.”

“What if he hurts momma?”

“No one is going to hurt your mum. I won’t let that happen. So can you do that for me? Go inside with Abuela? Just for a little bit. And then we’ll go and do something. Just the two of us. Is that alright? If we do something together? Are you okay with that?”

“Just us?”

“Just us. If you’re comfortable with just me. If you’d rather mumma tag along…”

“No. I’m okay with it. Just us. Maybe we can go swimming? They have a pool here. And it’s nice and warm. It’s not as fun as the beach, but…”

“You put your bathing suit on when you’re inside and I’ll take you down to the pool. Maybe we can go and get ice cream after. If my chubby tummy can handle it.”

She finally manages a smile, then sniffles noisily and wipes her nose on her sleeve. “Mint chocolate chip?”

“Of course. It’s our favourite. There’s no other kind. So you can do all of that for me? I know how strong you are. How brave. You get that from your mum. She is the strongest person I have EVER known. And you come from her, so…”

“Even stronger than you?”

“MUCH stronger than me. Go inside, okay?” Giving her a reassuring hug, he drops a kiss on the top of her head and then reaches for not only the doll and koala bear Esme holds, but the backpack slung over her shoulder. “Take your stuff with you. So you got your beads and what not if you want to make those bracelets.”

Helping Millie shrug into the backpack, he tucks the doll under one arm, the bear under the other, running a hand over the top of her head before Abuela lays a hand on Millie’s shoulder and gently leads her towards the door. Hesitating on the threshold, Millie glances over her shoulder at Tyler. Tears sparkling in her eyes, as her chin trembles and she tries to remain as stoic as possible.

“You promise, Tyler? You promise you’ll come and get me?”

He struggles with his own emotion; a potent cocktail of rage and heartache to know that someone has mistreated her. It’s only been twenty-four years but the love and the pride he feels towards her is all-consuming; this beautiful, healthy little girl that’s a mixture of himself and the love of his life. It’s surreal; the realization that he is indeed a father again. And while it isn’t the time to jump fully into that role, he can give Millie what she so desperately needs at the present; a sense of safety and security and someone she can trust to protect her. At all costs.

“I promise. I’ll be there in a little bit, okay?”

Nodding, she gives a wiggle of her fingertips in a departing wave and then allows Abuela to lead her into the suite.

****

They stand in silence; waiting to hear if anything goes wrong within the hotel room. And it’s Tyler that speaks first; attempting to push away the anger and animosity he feels towards his old friend and colleague. It’s hard to be civil in the face of Nik’s betrayal; the painful truth that she’d kept Esme’s whereabouts and Millie’s existence a secret. But he reminds himself that it isn’t the time for personal quarrels; Alessio’s appearance bringing the job back to the forefront.

“How’d he get in here Nik? You told me this place was safe. That no one could get to them here.”

“Winston let him.”

“Of fucking course he did.”

“But why would he do that?” Esme inquires. “He’s the one that gave us somewhere to hide out. Why would he just let Alessio walk in, never mind get THIS close?”

“I think it’s personal,” Nik replies. “I know there’s no love lost between him and Tyler and…”

Tyler scowls. “He told you?”

“Told her what?” Esme’s eyes narrow in confusion as she glances back and forth between the two. “What did Winston tell her? What’s going on? What…?”

“Winston and I had a little disagreement. “About…?”

“About what we think is best for you. And Millie. We weren’t exactly on the same page.”

“And what DO you guys think is best for us?”

“I told him that I thought bringing both of you to Australia, getting settled, and starting a life there would be in your best interests. He disagreed. Thought it was better that I brought you back here. To New York City. So he could keep an eye on you.”

“Keep an eye on me? I don’t need him…of all people…keeping an eye on me. Once I’m out of here I am NOT coming back. Ever. If I never see this place again, it’ll be too soon.”

“He seems to have it in his head that you can’t survive without him,” Nik explains. “That you’re better off here…under his roof…than anywhere else.”

“I hope you told him to go and get fucked. Because that’s the furthest thing from the truth. I’m grateful for everything he’s done, but this is the last place I want to be. Kept like some prisoner. That’s not much of a life. For either of us. But especially for Millie.”

“I think he has some weird-ass obsession with you,” Tyler adds. “That goes way beyond the father-daughter bullshit that he spews all the time.”

Nik smirks. “You THINK? It’s not obvious?”

“That is just…” Esme’s nose wrinkles in disgust. “....ewwww. I’ve never gotten that kind of vibe from him. He’s always respected my boundaries and never tried anything. I would have kicked him in the nuts if he did. Did he actually admit to all of this? That he’s got some creepy hopeful sugar daddy going on?”

“Not in so many words, but…”

Nik pipes up. “When he offers to double someone’s payout so they’ll bring you back here and walk out of your life, it’s safe to say there’s nothing normal about how he feels about you.”

“Wait…what? He did WHAT?”

Tyler glares at his old friend. “You did NOT need to tell her that.”

“I assumed she knew. That you already would have told her.”

“I didn’t tell her because I didn’t think she needed to know that part. What good does it do? She’s got enough going on. Add Winston and his bullshit to the list…”

“He offered you money?” Esme struggles to digest the information. “ To bring us back to The Continental and leave us here? Is that what went on? Is that why he showed up here? THAT’S what he wanted to talk to you about? He wanted to pay you off?”

Nik sighs, then addresses Tyler. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to cause issues. I thought she knew. That you would have told her.”

“What did you say to him?” Esme inquiries, as she moves closer to him; suddenly needing the comfort that his much stronger, heavier body can provide her with. He’s always been her protector; ready, willing, and able to do whatever he had to do in order to keep her safe.

“What do you think I said? I told him to take his money and shove it up his ass. There’s no ‘deal’ to be made. You and Millie? You two aren’t up for negotiation. And I let him know that. That I’m getting you two the fuck out of here and I’m not bringing you back. I don’t care how much money he throws at me.”

“This is just…” Esme pushes both hands through her hair. “...I honestly can’t believe he’d do that. I already told him; once we’re out of here, we aren’t coming back. We’re going on with our lives. I told him that we already talked about all of this. That Millie and I were going to make a life in Australia. With YOU. Whether it’s under the same roof or starting out in separate places. I made it very clear that it wasn’t up for debate.”

“He seems to think it is. He’s got it in his head that I’m some piece of shit that would abandon you and Millie. That I’m some enormous fuck up that’s going to ruin your lives.”

“That is the furthest thing from the truth. You’re none of those things. And I told him all of that. I told him that we were going to be a family. Or at least try being one. That we were going to work through our shit. Get past everything that’s happened. Have a good life together. Give Millie a mom AND a dad. I made it pretty clear that it was my life and my decision.”

“He obviously didn’t listen. Because he’s pretty convinced you’re better off here. That this is the only place you can have a good life.”

“He’s full of shit. And if he thinks I’d EVER think of him in THAT way…”

“I know I opened up a huge can of worms and you two have a lot to talk about,” Nik speaks up. “ But I think we need to refocus. Get back to what’s going on right now. Because whether we like it or not, Alessio IS here. He’s got no intention of leaving until he gets what he wants. And seeing as we can’t force him to leave and we can’t toss him out…”

“What choice do I really have? If he’s not going to leave…”

“I don’t want you alone with him,” Tyler says. “I don’t trust him. If he and Winston are that buddy-buddy, you can’t tell me that he wouldn’t be allowed to break High Table rules. That Winston wouldn’t look the other way.”

“I’ll stay,” Nik offers. “I’ll hang out in another room and keep my ears open. If I even hear things starting to go south…”

“He’s not going to hurt me,” Esme assures them. “Yeah, he’s an asshole in many ways, but putting his hands on women? That’s not his style.”

“His family tried to kill you,” Tyler reminds her. “And Millie. He’s got people just lying in wait outside. They will put a bullet in you the second you step out there.”

“Alessio isn’t like them. He’s nowhere near as committed to that life. And he’s not as loyal to the family as they think he is. He spent the last eight months spilling a lot of their secrets. He wasn’t shy about all the twisted and gory details.”

“Doesn’t mean he won’t go to bat for them now. You’ve disgraced his family. Made him look like a complete fool. These people don’t take betrayal lightly.”

“You heard what Nik said, Tyler. He’s not going to leave. And as much as I know you want to just beat the living shit out of him…”

“I can’t just leave you with him. And I already told Millie…”

“I’ll be fine. Nik will be close by. She’s not going to let him do anything. I know you don’t exactly trust her right now, but I DO. She’s kept us safe and sound all these years. She can do it for another half an hour.”

“I know you’re pretty pissed at me right now, Tyler…” Nik begins.

‘That’s an understatement.”

“...but we need to shelve the personal shit. We can deal with all of that later. I know you have a lot to say to me and believe me, I’m going to let you have a chance to say it. But NOT right now. We have much bigger fish to fry. Not to mention less than forty-eight hours to figure out how the hell we’re all getting out of this city in one piece. So we can focus on what we’re really here for? The job?”

Sighing heavily, he briefly closes as he pinches the bridge of his nose between thumb and forefinger. “I need to talk to Esme.”

“Tyler, I…”

“Nik, there is a lot going on here. And believe it or not, not all of it involves you. I need to talk to her. ALONE.”

She accepts defeat; holding her hands up in surrender and then heads for the door and disappears inside. Tyler waits. Giving Nik a chance to clear the foyer and head further into the suite before he turns to Esme; watching as she chews on her bottom lip and nervously wrings her hands together.

“What do you want to do?”

“There’s not many options. Alessio won’t leave unless he gets what he wants. And as much as I’d love to see you hand him in his ass…”

“Do you want to try and get out of here? Just grab Millie and leave?”

“You know we won’t get far. They’ve got a small army out there. You against all of them? I’ve always had faith in your skills and the things you’re able to do, but…”

“Even I’m not dumb enough to think I stand a chance against all that firepower. There’s gotta be a way though. Of getting you and Millie out of here. With no one else knowing. There has to be some way they get people around without being noticed.”

“I mean there’s an underground garage and there’s passageways, but Winston monitors those. There’s security EVERYWHERE. There’s no way we’d be able to even get to them without being seen. And if he’s messed up enough to offer you money to leave Millie and me behind, what’s stopping him from letting the enemy know what we’re up to?”

“He wants me out of the picture. He made that clear. Many times.”

“And he can make it happen. He’s got the power of The High Table backing him up. And we’ve already dealt with them once before. Look what they did five years ago. Tyler, these are powerful people. They make Alessio’s family look tame. And if we don’t play ball with them, the DiTomassos are going to be the least of our worries.”

Leaning back against the wall, he runs his hands over his weary, unshaven face. “I don’t like any of this.”

“Neither do I. And I’m starting to regret dragging you into this. There you were, just living a nice, quiet life and…”

“I was living a miserable life. Just like I have been for the last five years.”

“Which was my fault, too. Everything I touch, I totally fuck up. Your life, Millie’s life.”

“You haven’t fucked anything up. I mean, just look at her Esme. Look at how amazing your daughter…OUR daughter…is. She’s beautiful and she’s insanely smart and she loves the world and everyone in it. Her life is far from fucked up. Look at how much she loves you. And trusts you. You did that all on your own. Brought her up this far. And she’s incredible.”

“But I didn’t HAVE to do it alone. I had a choice. Once all the smoke cleared and we didn’t have to hide anymore. I could have made things so much easier on myself. And Millie. But I didn’t do it because I was a stupid, selfish little girl that couldn’t handle the thought of rejection. Or of seeing you with someone else.”

“That was what it was? The real reason? Why you didn’t get a hold of me?”

“I couldn’t handle it. The thought of you being with someone else, let alone SEEING it. And I realize how ridiculous that sounds now. You had every right to go on with your life; to meet someone else and fall in love and get married and have a family. But every time I thought about it, it made me sick to my stomach. I couldn’t have you and I didn’t want anyone else to either. How pathetic is that?”

“Wanna hear pathetic? Every time I think of you with that asshole in there, I want to put my fist through a wall. Or throw that fucker out a window.”

“I was so scared. I was worried that if I called you or just showed up on your doorstep, you’d turn us away. That you’d still be so angry that you wouldn’t want anything to do with Millie.”

“That never would have happened. Not in a million years. I wouldn’t have turned her away. Or you.”

“The logical and rational side of me knew I was wrong. That you’d never do something like that. But when does fear make you think logically or rationally?”

“I wanted you. I never stopped wanting you. And if you’d just shown up on my doorstep, I would not have turned you away. Not when I spent so long missing you and wanting you back.”

“And now I’m back and look what’s happened. Look at the mess I dragged you into! This is NOT what I wanted. All those times I thought about just bringing Millie to you and begging you for another chance? None of them included THIS. If I’d just left you alone…”

“Esme…” Offering her a hand, he pulls her into him when she accepts; their fingers entwined and their joined hands resting on the small of her back. Her body resting against his as she stands between his legs; hands settling on his hips as he cradles the back of her head in his palm and presses a kiss to her brow. “...I don’t regret taking this job. And I won’t regret it no matter how messy it gets.”

“You had a normal life. You were doing normal things. And I came along and screwed that all up. Just like I screwed everything up five years ago.”

“Stop saying that. It’s not true. And you know it’s not. We had a good thing. A REALLY good thing. And yeah, it went bad and it sucked and the last five years have been pure and utter shit.”

“Because of me.”

“You didn’t know The High Table was going to come for you. There was no way you could have known that. And you were right; with what you said the other night. I wouldn’t have survived that. Challenging them. No way.”

“I had to protect you. I HAD to. I never would have forgiven myself if something happened to you.”

“And I’m starting to understand that. I’m not quite there yet, but I’ll get there. It’s hard. Normally I’m the one who does the protecting. Kinda hard to accept when I’m on the other side of the fence.”

A smile tugs at the corners of her mouth. “You and your ego. And your whole knight in shining armour thing you’ve got going on.”

“I thought it was ‘knight in slightly tarnished armour’?”

“You remember that?”

“I remember everything when it comes to you.”

“Even how you used to always leave the toilet seat up and your dirty socks in front of the hamper instead of in it? And how you always used to put your cold feet against the back of my legs in bed?”

“I don’t seem to remember any of THOSE things.”

“Typical.” She gives a small laugh. “You had a selective memory then, too.”

Pressing their joined hands against the small of her back, he draws her even tighter against him and kisses her; long and soft and sweet. “I don’t regret taking this job. And I’m not going to regret it; no matter how ugly it might get. At the risk of sounding sappy and embarrassing myself, it brought us back together. And it brought me Millie. Which is the most amazing thing that could have ever happened.”

“I never meant to hurt you, Tyler. It was never intentional. It was all me. It was never you. I was just worried and scared and…”

He pecks her lips to silence her. “I know. So what do you want to do?” Releasing her hand from behind her back, he runs both palms across her shoulders and down her arms. “About right now? And this dick head fiance of yours?”

“Like Nik said; he’s not going to go away. It’s better if I just suck it up and talk to him. See what he has to say.”

“I’m sure he’s pretty pissed. Being led on for eight months. You’ll be okay? Being alone with him?”

“He won’t hurt me. He knows better. He knows I’ll fucking drop him.”

Tyler grins. “That’s my girl.”

“I’ll be fine. Nik will be close by. I trust her. With my life. With Millie’s life, even. And I know you’ve got a raging hate-on for her right now, but maybe you could shove that aside? Until we’re at least out of New York?”

“I can do that.”

“If you don’t trust Nik, trust me. I know what I’m doing. I know what Alessio is like. He’s not a threat. He’s an asshole, but definitely not a threat.”

“Good. Because I really don’t want to be throwing anyone out the window. Not today, anyway.”

Smiling, she stands on her tiptoes and presses a kiss to the tip of his chin. “You’d do that for me?”

“Are you kidding me?” Gentle fingertips explore the bruises and cuts on her face, then loop pieces of hair behind her ears. “ I’d set the world on fire for you.”

[ourlittleforever]

Love is Stored in the Kitchen

Arvad's love language is food. Pre-relationship fluff.

Rating: G

Words: ~1500

Warnings: none

Also on AO3!

Knock knock. The sound of someone at the door yanked Millie from their thoughts; they’d been so focused on unpacking their bags that they hadn’t even heard anyone approach the door. “Come in!”

They tossed the last of their dresses onto the bed and clambered to their feet, dusting their skirt off as the door opened. Arvad, the ship’s chief of security, was standing awkwardly in the doorway, holding a plate with a towel over the top of it. He nodded politely to them.

“I brought you something.”

“I see that,” Millie teased, carefully stepping over the vast array of their belongings strewn about the floor. They sniffed, catching the scent of chocolate and sugar, and their eyes lit up. “Are those… cookies?”

“Yes.” Arvad handed them the plate, and the warlock gingerly lifted the towel. The cookies were chocolate chip, perfectly golden and delightfully soft. They picked one up and took a bite, a hum of contentment escaping their throat.

“Oh my goodness. These are amazing.” Millie stuffed the rest of the cookie in their mouth without thinking; Arvad was watching with a quietly pleased expression. “You didn’t have to,” they said, covering their mouth as they finished chewing. “But thanks!” They paused, then quickly added, “I’ll try not to eat them all at once. Or so messily. Sorry.”

“I’m glad you enjoy them,” he replied, stepping away from the door. “Welcome aboard.”

—

“Millie, can you come here?”

Millie backpedaled, still amazed Arvad could tell their footsteps apart from everyone else’s. He said they walked heavily; they’d tried to walk lighter, but he always knew it was them. Millie poked their head into the kitchen. “What’s up?”

“Can you taste this for me?”

“Sure. What is it?” Millie sauntered over to the stove, where Arvad was cooking some type of stew. The liquid was a deep, ruddy orange, and they could see bits of beef, potatoes, and carrots floating in the mixture.

“Benalish beef stew.” Arvad dipped a clean spoon into the stew and, cupping his hand under it, held it out to Millie. Without even thinking to take the spoon for themself, Millie leaned forward, savoring the taste of the stew on their tongue. It was hearty, flawlessly seasoned, and reminded them of their home in the Croger mountains. Millie’s eyes fluttered shut at a memory of their grandmother, standing at the stove as they studied, humming an odd tune.

They stepped back, and upon realizing what they’d done, Millie’s face became uncomfortably warm. Arvad was seemingly unfazed, placing the spoon in the sink, but there was a slight stiffness in his movements now. He glanced at Millie over his shoulder. “What did you think?”

“It’s wonderful. As always.” Millie glanced at their feet, trying not to think of how close they were to him, and how he’d given them a taste of the stew, his fingers so close to their face. “Why do you have me taste-test your food? You know it’s going to come out amazing.”

“I was worried about the spices I chose,” Arvad admitted.

“You don’t have to worry. You’re an excellent cook.”

“Thank you,” he replied, rubbing the back of his neck. Millie was acutely aware of how close he was standing to them, the subtle scent of his cologne (“Even a vampire needs to smell nice,” he’d said), the shadow he cast on them as his imposing height blocked the low light in the kitchen. The warlock’s body felt warm in his presence.

The world saw a vampire. Millie saw… Arvad, the gentlest person they’d ever met. Their eyes caught on his soft belly, hanging over his belt slightly, and they quickly glanced away – but they were, admittedly, pleased that he wasn’t all-muscle, all-the-time. “Um. I should get going. I’ll set the table.”

“Alright. I’ll meet you out there in a bit.”

Millie shuffled out of the kitchen, their face beet red, heart thumping, and thoughts racing.

—

“Hey, how come Arvad lets you in the kitchen when he’s cooking?” Raff asked, setting his chin in his hand. He frowned deeply. “He always tells me to get out if I try to come in.”

“Are you casting spells while you’re in there?”

“That was one time!”

“So that’s the reason,” Millie replied, taking a bite of their sandwich. Arvad had prepared Raff and their sandwiches for the day; the warlock and the wizard were sent to retrieve spellcasting supplies while Jhoira, Shanna, Arvad, and Tiana spoke to Benalish officials about the crew’s next move. The youngest members of the Weatherlight had been a bit annoyed at being left behind, but ultimately, Millie didn’t mind. Raff was pleasant company. They were surprised to learn he was seven years their junior, as he was incredibly well-spoken and intelligent.

“That’s not the reason. He doesn’t want Shanna or Jhoira or Tiana in there, either,” Raff huffed. “I think he likes you.”

“Whatever,” Millie said, but they could feel heat creeping up their neck at the thought. Millie noticed that Raff’s sandwich was stacked with lettuce, tomatoes, and some kind of sauce. Their own sandwich was plain, with cheese and turkey.

Some time ago, Arvad had packed them a lunch with a vegetable filled sandwich; Millie had tried to stomach it out of politeness, but they barely got half of it down due to the textures. They’d never told Arvad they didn’t enjoy sandwiches like that.

He remembered.

“What’s so dreamy about turkey and cheese?” Raff asked, snapping Millie out of their thoughts.

“Nothing.” Millie glanced in the basket, where four cookies sat in a neat paper package. Oatmeal – their favorite. A soft smile tugged at the corners of their lips.

“Thinking about your knight?”

“No…”

“You are!” Raff reached across the table and poked Millie’s arm. “You’re too easy to read! How come you don’t make a move?”

“It wouldn’t be…”

“Wouldn’t be what?”

“I don’t know.” Millie sighed. “I don’t want – well, if things ended up badly… the crew… I wouldn’t want to make things weird.”

“You worry too much.”

“Just trying to be practical.”

Raff reached into the basket to retrieve two cookies, wrinkling his nose. “Oatmeal? Yuck!” He handed them to Millie. “Here, take ‘em. I hate oatmeal.”

Millie blinked, then grinned.

—

“Ow,” Millie pulled their arm out of the blackberry brambles and examined the scratches flaring on their skin. Hot bright red welts danced across the ivory, and they winced. They’d left their witch-hazel back on the ship, of course – Millie had no idea they were allergic to the brambles. They sat back in the grass, considering their options. The warlock looked over at Arvad, then back at their splotchy arms and the angry contusions forming on their skin. Millie didn’t want him to be alone out here.

The things I do for love.

Millie reached into their side bag and found a few strips of cotton gauze, for emergency use. Gingerly, they wrapped their arms in the fabric, then set back into the blackberry bush. Their hands itched and burned, and their arms weren’t any better, but they endured, leaning further into the bush. A cluster of blackberries hovered just in front of their short, stubby fingers, taunting them. Millie canted into the bush, desperately trying to keep their face out of the thorns’ way. “C’mon… almoooooost… Damnit…”

“Millie.”

They yipped and nearly leapt from the grass, Arvad’s hand on their shoulder being the only thing keeping them on the ground. He knelt beside them, taking their hands in his. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were allergic.”

“Me neither,” they murmured with a defeated little chuckle. “Oh well. It’s nothing a good washing and some witch-hazel can’t fix.” They nodded to the bush. “There’s a really good cluster in there, but I can’t reach it. I wanted to get it before we left.”

“I think we have enough. But…” Arvad reached into the brush, squinting in the darkness. There was a snapping sound, and he pulled his hand out, blackberries in hand. “Here. You’re not allergic to the berries themselves, right?”

“Right.” Millie opened their hand, and Arvad dropped the berries into their open palm. “Thank you,” they said, and they popped the berries into their mouth. Juice dribbled down their chin, and Millie giggled despite themself, despite the burning and itching and the sensation of a bug crawling over their leg.

This was good.

Arvad smile – a true, beautiful, wonderful smile, and Millie’s heart ached. “You know,” he said, “I can’t eat real food anymore, but… it’s nice to watch others enjoy it.” His voice held a bittersweet quality as he spoke. “I’ll just live vicariously through you, when it comes to eating.”

“Is that why you’re always trying to fatten me up?” The warlock scowled. “Hey! Don’t snicker! I’ve gained thirty pounds!”

He laughed. Arvad never laughed, but he laughed for Millie. In spite of themself, they laughed, too.

The sun set, and the two walked back to the Weatherlight, itchy little hand in calloused hand.

[legendary-cookies]

Any more headcanons for Windy?

Oh, plenty lmfao

The last post was more general stuff but I'll share some headcanons about his relationships with the other Legends

I have way too many headcanons to be considered normal so I'll try to limit it to 2 per Legend lmao

If you're curious about any specific relationship though, don't be afraid to ask!

One general headcanon that applies to all of them is that all of the Legends have a soft spot for Wind Archer because he's the youngest Legend

It's not a super strong emotion in all of them, but it's definitely there

- Sea Fairy and Wind see each other as siblings and Sea is incredibly protective of him ("You protect others all the time, but who will protect you?")

- Sea and Wind have teasing nicknames for each other: Sea calls Wind "lemongrass" and Wind calls Sea "saltwater" (like a person being sour and salty respectively because I'm aware saltwater and lemongrass are real things)

- Moonlight and Wind are very close friends and Moon is the mom friend, reminding Wind to take care of himself and such

- Moon and Wind both have problems with opening up so they try to be there for each other in that aspect; Moon worries too much over others that she forgets she can have feelings too and Wind has trust issues and is scared of being open and vulnerable

- Fire Spirit and Wind are very close friends and Fire can bring out Wind's mischievous side better than others can

- Fire feels uncomfortable around water so Wind tries to help him feel more comfortable around it; in return, Fire helps Wind work through his pyrophobia

- Millennial Tree and Wind have a father-son relationship but this is actually uncommon knowledge to Cookies that live outside of the forest; Wind is mostly known for being the Guardian of the Millennial Tree but not his son

- Wind is actually the one that gave Millie that nickname but he's too embarrassed to admit it

- Dark Enchantress and Wind don't like each other very much for obvious reasons

- DE has hidden guilt over Wind's corruption as she was indirectly the cause and Wind resents her for the event as it was very traumatizing

- Timekeeper thinks Wind is interesting because he reminds them of Croissant in a way and Wind is neutral to Timekeeper

- While Timekeeper thinks everybody is interesting in one way or another, they're particularly curious about Wind because they consider Millie their rival

- Frost Queen is Wind's aunt but Wind doesn't like visiting that much because of how cold it is; Frost Queen tries to make sure Wind is comfortable and warm whenever he does visit though

- Frost Queen is very caring towards Wind both because he's family and he reminds her of Sherbet a little too much

- Black Pearl thinks Wind is cute in a condescending way and Wind is secretly terrified of Black Pearl

- Black Pearl is the type to gush about how cute something is with an underlying threat ("You're so cute I could just eat you up!") and it freaked Wind out the first time she said something like that to him

- Pitaya and Wind have a somewhat close relationship as Wind is close friends with Pitaya's son and Pitaya is friends with Millie

- Pitaya likes to spar with anybody and Wind is a great opponent; they can be surprisingly gentle though and while they don't go easy on Wind, they do keep his pyrophobia in mind and tries to minimize the use of their fire abilities

- Ananas sort of sees Wind as a rival due to them having opposite elements but Wind is neutral to Ananas

- Ananas likes to make fun of Wind for being so "small and weak" for a Legendary but they don't like to admit that Wind kicked them in the knee once and they weren't able to use that leg for a week

- Lotus knows Wind was created from a lotus flower and they respect anything associated with their flower while Wind doesn't have any strong feelings towards Lotus except that he isn't a fan of the "taking life force to keep the paradise beautiful" thing

- Lotus acts almost parental towards Wind which severely confuses Wind and the other dragons because Lotus is known for not liking Cookies that much (not to the degree of Lychee and Longan but enough that it's noticeable)

- Lychee thinks Wind is too serious and no fun and Wind doesn't like Lychee because of the darkness aspect

- Lychee likes Wind in the sense that they can brag to the other dragons that there's a Legendary smaller than them and Wind despises it

- Longan doesn't like Wind because he's an element in the form of a Cookie and Longan's goal of wiping out all life contradicts Wind's goal of protecting all life

- While they don't like each other, Longan is intrigued by Wind because they technically share the same element and Wind is more unsettled by Longan than hateful

[alphareleasemedia]

Daily Drabbles for 11/21/24 - 11/25/24

11/21/24 Milly helped herself to another cookie. There were baked goods of all kinds on the table, from pies, to cakes, to pastries, yet Milly couldn't stop herself from coming back to the chocolate chip cookies over and over again. In her defense they were the best chocolate chip cookies she had ever had. Milly had never been much for cakes, she always found them too dry. And she wasn't the biggest fan of fruit, there were only a few she could tolerate, and even less she liked baked into various kinds of desserts. Chocolate chip cookies were simply the best.

11/22/24 Nate held very still. There was an excited dog doing zoomies around his feet and he was holding a plate full of food in one hand and a drink in another. One wrong move and it would all come crashing down. Which would only make the dog even more excited. Durango had gotten it in his head that whenever someone was eating chicken some of it would go to him. Nate had never done anything to encourage this belief, but Aubrey couldn't help herself. As soon as Durango got excited she just had to give him a piece of chicken.

11/23/24 Oscar drummed his fingers on the table as he stared out the window at the passing scenery. He'd gotten tired of the loud chatter back in the compartment and had moved to the dining car to be by himself, but now he was just bored. There were a few other people in the dining car, but thankfully they were keeping quiet, only talking in hushed tones. The sun had finally climbed above the horizon, but the lights in the train were still on. Oscar's face reflected back at him as he stared out the window, his expression dull and vacant.

11/24/24 Pipa swiveled her straw around in her cup to pick up the last bits of her chocolate milkshake. Siri had taken the lid off of her strawberry milkshake and had tilted the cup back to dump the rest of her shake in her mouth. Pipa pulled the lid off her own shake to check if she missed anything, but the cup was empty. Pipa sucked on the end of her straw to get the very last drops of her shake. Siri slammed her empty cup on the table and belched loudly. She had a pink milkshake mustache above her lip.

11/25/24 Quinn scooped up a handful of snow and packed it together tightly into a ball. Darren was busily rolling up the base for a snowman and completely oblivious to what Quinn was doing. She quietly stalked forward towards Darren as he got the large ball of snow situated how he wanted it. When she was a few feet from him Quinn stopped and waited, holding her arm at the ready to throw the second that Darren turned around. He took his time, but finally he did stand up straight and spin around. Quinn's snowball hit him square in the face.

[peace-coast-island]

Diary of a Junebug

Sundaes, tea, and confetti candles at Milkcloud

Tea is the theme for this fun collab between the camp, Milkcloud, and Flickering Dreams. From tea flavored ice cream to confetti tea leaf candles - and even some of the other kind of tea - I’d say we really went all out! There’s nothing like getting warm and cozy with a hot cup of tea - one of those little simple pleasures that helps me get through the day.

So we’re making tea ice cream, which may sound unusual, but it works really well. Matcha ice cream is actually one of my top favorite flavors, and I grew up eating tea flavored sweets, so to me, it’s not strange. Sure, it’s not everyone’s cup of tea (ha!), but if you do like tea a lot, I’d recommend giving some stuff like that a try. Obviously not all teas translate well to ice cream, though the ones that go well with milk and sugar are perfect - like chai, earl grey, Thai tea, and London fog.

After making the ice cream, we had to make them into cute sundaes, because why not? We were in the mood to do a little baking, so we made a batch of shortbread cookies in a bunch of cute shapes. You can’t really go wrong with shortbread and tea, and turning that into a sundae takes it to another level.

Then we made candles decorated with dried tea leaves, which kinda reminded us of confetti - hence, the name. They’re basically a bunch of cute tealights with a little extra touch. Definitely screams fall aesthetic, something I’m all for!

So we’ve got us campers, Kati, Millie, Junia, Nina, Emma, Alexi, and Sabrina, an occasional vlogger who’s the newest member of the Milkcloud crew. We’re all just chilling out, enjoying our sundae creations and serving some tea. In other words, there’s some drama going on in the content creator world - not exactly a hot topic, more like something that happened a while back that continues to have repercussions. Kinda like beating a dead horse sort of thing that’s veered into uncomfortable territory.

Sabrina’s not directly involved with the original controversy that sparked the current situation, but that person happens to be her sister. Sammie, aka swiftlysammie formerly of the Awesome Sisters, was - and still is - a bit of a controversial figure in some circles. She and her two ex-best friends started Awesome Sisters in high school, which then took off a few years later thanks to Hologram Viral, a company that’s kinda evolved into a toxic cesspool of social media and content creation, I’m afraid to say.

A lot of what I hear about Hologram is not good - like, I’m just sitting here minding my own business in my little corner and every so often I hear a commotion outside. Sometimes I think I’m a bit too chronically online - who doesn’t these days? - and then I hear about discourse around the most random trivial shit and realize. “Hey, how’s it going, you good? How about getting offline and touching some grass once in a while and maybe you’ll realize how little people really care about whatever you’re throwing a tantrum over and just get on with their lives.”

Seriously, constantly engaging in online discourse is like poison for your brain.

So, the story basically goes like this. About a year ago, Sammie was canceled when she lost her temper during an argument and punched someone during a livestream. According to Sabrina, Sammie’s been likely struggling with anger issues her whole life, which she is finally working on addressing. As a result, she became the target of harassment and was kicked out of Awesome Sisters and Hologram Viral.

Because they have different mothers, Sabrina and Sammie didn’t grow up in the same household. For context, their father has been married and divorced eight times - Sabrina from marriage number four, Sammie from marriage number six. Since Sabrina’s an only child and Sammie has two other siblings, Sabrina was shipped off to her stepmother’s during the weekends. While she got along with her siblings for the most part, they weren’t particularly that close.

It took her a while to fully understand what had transpired between Sammie and the Awesome Sisters, part of it because she simply didn’t want to get involved. Unlike her sister, Sabrina doesn’t revolve her life around content creation. To her, it’s a fun hobby that unexpectedly took off, and while it has grown to be more than just video diaries, she prefers to strictly keep it as a side thing, not her personality or her livelihood. In fact, seeing how Sammie turned out was the main reason why she refuses to become a full time content creator.

After a flimsy apology video she later deleted and several lackluster attempts going solo, Sammie eventually caught the attention of a group of misfits living in an old mansion outside the city. Then she and gang - Garnet, Hyacinth, Azure, Chyna, and Dinah went on to become Chill Out Besties, a channel that’s a hodgepodge of content from clickbait challenges, music, recipes, gaming, and casual vlogs. A combination of the erratic upload schedule, the inconsistent content, and the quirkiness of the ladies ended up being their selling point as Sammie was determined to get as many views as possible to stick it up to everyone who looked down on her.

The girls, specifically Garnet and Chyna, were the stars of the show while Sammie worked behind the scenes. Over time, the girls began having more creative input while Sammie lightened up on her mission to keep up with the trends, which allowed the channel to really take off. There’s still some clickbaity stuff here and there, but it doesn’t feel forced, more like them just messing around, which I think makes it feel less like they’re doing it for the trend and more like, “We’re doing this because we think it would be fun.” Although it’s not my thing, I can see the appeal.

The fact that Sammie was behind Chill Out Besties wasn’t supposed to be publicly known for various reasons, mainly because of the backlash. Her old friends at Awesome Sisters found out by chance when they happened to run into each other. They started talking, Sammie revealed what she’d been up to, and then the girls secretly filmed the whole thing, staging it as a reconciliation.

What they uploaded was very different from reality, framing Sammie as a “mentally unstable brute”, consequently putting Chill Out Besties under fire. Sabrina was unwillingly dragged into that drama when some people found out that they were related. She described it as brutal, even more so than the original controversy. Sammie was already a polarizing Awesome Sister due to her short temper and people were far too eager to jump on her whenever she lost her cool or put her foot in her mouth.

At this point it doesn’t matter if she was a straight up unlikable bitch, harassing and bullying someone to the point where she’s contemplating suicide is fucking unacceptable. Not to mention harassing her friends and family and revealing personal information to use against them. And a lot of that was coming from those affiliated with Hologram, which makes it ten times worse.

Then that died down after a while, probably because they got bored when they realized that they weren’t gonna get a rise out of Sammie. Sabrina believes that Garnet, who eventually became her girlfriend, had a lot to do with that. Plus the fact that she knows that Sammie has been a lot happier and less stressed out since meeting Garnet and the others. Sabrina has only really gotten to know Garnet, Azure, and Hyacinth recently, and her impression so far is that they’re loud and eccentric, but they’re also genuinely kind and sincere, unlike the other two Awesome Sisters. She also believes that Garnet is the best thing to ever happen for Sammie, even more so after the incident earlier this year.

Said incident took place at a convention where various content creators from all over meet up. It happens to be the same event where Nina and a couple others ended up seriously injured when they decided that safety wasn’t a priority. Ever since management changed, that event seems to be drawing a lot of controversies, the toxic and unwelcoming environment being a major one.

Serious and disabling injuries was bad, now what about attempted murder? That’s right, Chill Out Besties was poisoned at some point during the three day event, the culprit being poisonous mushrooms in a dish they ordered from the retreat they were sharing with a bunch of other content creators, including the Awesome Sisters.

While the others eventually recovered, Sammie suffered extensive kidney damage and is now on dialysis. There’s no doubt that she was the intended target and that the Awesome Sisters are involved somehow. However, it’s hard to pinpoint exactly where they play a role in all of this, especially since Sammie herself doesn’t believe either one would know anything about poisonous mushrooms. There’s also the question of how they would have access to the kitchen. In other words, this was a coordinated attack.

Not surprisingly, no action was taken despite the fact that people almost died. And Hologram Viral’s content creators memed the shit out of that incident to boost their views, which is really fucked up. It seems strange that Sammie’s still trying to regain respect from Hologram when they made it clear that they don’t respect her at all, but she has her reasons. Sabrina hates to say it, but it seems like they’re rooting for her death because they think she deserves it. As for the Awesome Sisters, they could probably benefit from her being dead far more than being alive in terms of them being able to say whatever shit they want about her and get away with it since she wouldn’t be able to contradict them.

These people really have no sense of compassion or morals, it’s fucking sickening. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Eventually, the topic went from it’s okay to kill someone who’s a waste of space to eugenics is actually good for society. Ummmm…okay…. Like, I’m not surprised, but at the same time I’m like, you can’t really be serious? Like, you guys need to shut up forever, I’m not even kidding.

Sabrina and Sammie’s father then added fuel to the fire by revealing personal information about Sammie, like the fact that she’s in kidney failure and was diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder. Of course, the harassment and bullying returned with a vengeance as it gave the haters more of an excuse to beat her to the ground. It’s bad enough that NPD is already vilified by many, now there’s people proudly proclaiming that they’re ableist and view those with psychotic mental illnesses as monsters who deserve to be dehumanized. Yikes.

Then that turned to a discussion about how disabled and chronically ill people are a burden to society that must be eliminated. That only worthy people should be allowed to receive adequate healthcare while the losers aren’t worth caring about. As if it couldn’t become even more of a shitstorm of a dumpster fire.

Along with the topic of certain people should be denied medical care, there’s also people saying that you’re better off dead if you have to take meds in order to live. By that logic, those like Nina and Kati, who have to take medications every day for the rest of their lives to prevent their immune systems from killing them, don’t deserve the right to live.

To add even more to this shitshow, fucking Mae and Alon are also contributing with their own shitty takes. Alon saying that he refused to be a donor for Pippa’s bone marrow transplant because she hadn’t done anything worthwhile to prove herself and acting like it’s worth bragging about because it shows that he has high standards or whatever. Like, who the fuck acts like refusing to help a family member makes you superior? It just makes you look like a selfish asshole. Then Mae went on again about damaged goods and how it’s a good thing to treat people as disposable because it shows you’re better than everyone. To think I grew up alongside those two…. I feel awful for Daisy Jane, Almie, and Pippa.

For the time being, Chill Out Besties is still doing occasional livestreams. Sammie’s still involved behind the scenes, but to a far lesser extent because she can no longer keep up with her old schedule, which was already ridiculous to begin with. As far as Sabrina knows, Sammie has never taken a break from content creation since she started, even when she initially got canceled, which is wild. At least she’s finally slowing down now, though not by choice, and that has been beneficial for her.

With the future of Chill Out Besties still up in the air, Sabrina believes that maybe Sammie would be better off quitting the world of content creation for good if that venture eventually doesn’t work out. Since the chances of her leaving is unlikely, then she hopes that Chill Out Besties successfully becomes its own thing and that Sammie completely severs her ties with Hologram.

I agree with Nina and Sabrina that it’s not worth sticking around with those who don’t respect you. That became even more apparent when a bunch of people put up fake fundraisers claiming that they were asked by Sammie’s family to help pay for her transplant. Chill Out Besties put out a video in response to those, denouncing those who thought it would be a good idea to profit out of someone’s suffering. Like seriously, what the fuck? Garnet went on to say that now she knows who not to turn to for help if any of them were in a difficult situation.

Now that her relationship with Sammie is public knowledge, Garnet’s also receiving a lot of harassment, which she seems to shrug off easily. Sabrina feels like it’s more that she would rather be the target over anyone else, which I get. It’s one thing to bully you, it’s another to bully those close to you. Still, it’s not nice being the center of a hate campaign, though Sabrina feels that compared to Sammie, Garnet seems to be handling things better in terms of not letting it completely get to her head.

I can kinda understand why Sammie feels the need to validate herself and tell her haters to stick it, but now it’s getting to a point where she’s fighting a losing battle. They clearly don’t value her life, so why would they give a fuck if she was doing well? Better to sever her ties and get on with her own life.

Ongoing drama aside, Sabrina says that Sammie’s doing all right. It seems that her brush with death has made her realize that she needed to grow up and take responsibility for her actions. Along with dialysis three times a week, she’s also working on her anger issues and NPD with a counselor. However, it looks like she’ll need a kidney transplant, so they’ve already tested the family for donors. Sabrina just found out not too long ago that she wouldn’t be a good match, which leaves their brother as the best candidate.

Even if Chill Out Besties ends for good, Sabrina knows that Garnet and the others will continue to stick around Sammie because they genuinely care about her, and vice versa. Plus, they’ve proved to Sammie that her life doesn’t have to revolve around content creation and getting the most popularity votes, which was something Sabrina had been trying to get through to her for years. And truth be told, Sabrina never really liked the Awesome Sisters, and I think she had every reason not to considering how they turned out. So Sammie getting canceled ended up being sort of a blessing in disguise, though in sort of a convoluted way.

And that’s the tea - the other kind. Alexi and Emma are aware of the drama, which they also agree has become like beating a dead horse at that point. Sammie’s no saint, nor she’s an abusive monster her haters paint her to be, but there’s no denying that she’s dealing with a bunch of deep rooted issues that a toxic environment like Hologram Viral exacerbated to the point that she was well on her way towards self destruction. At least the one thing Hologram did right was give her the boot, which then kinda forced her to deal with her problems.

Now, if only they can just let her learn from her mistakes, move on, and do her own thing instead of turning her into a punching bag for clout, but that’s Hologram for ya. People make mistakes, and if they’re willing to own up to them, we should allow them to. That’s not to say you have to forgive them if they truly hurt you, but you just have to let them live their lives without your shadow hanging over them.

Sometimes you don’t need alcohol to open up, not when there’s some piping hot tea to serve.

Read on AO3

[babygirlaffirmations]

Writing about the party for Daddy, the night of 10-14-23

Tonight I picked out a cute dress and sent Daddy photos. I went to a kink party for Riley's birthday. Logan ended up messaging me right as I was getting ready before heading out asking if I still needed a ride with his new partner Milly. They were both really sweet. We had good conversation on the way there about kink and what roles we fall into in the community. We got to the party and I sat on the couch on some rainbow pillows. I got overwhelmed really fast after a few mins and went into the back room and had some anxiety. Mike was really sweet and came to comfort me and did parallel play. When I needed to talk he was there to listen, but otherwise he was on his phone nearby reading. It was comforting to be off the main area. And control my social interactions. I kept my mask on for all the big room stuff and a lot of time in the back room when I wasn't eating. I wanted to make sure to be extra healthy for Daddy soon. Especially after being at the end of my infection clearing up after finishing my antibiotics. Mike was so wholesome and the main reason I lasted 4 hours instead of just minutes. He got me food twice, naan and rice. He somehow knew and offered to get me very plain food. And I really needed that. My body was starving. And up to that point I had eaten only macaroni noodles, half a chocolate bar, and one pickle spear. He also got me water. Even grabbed my sweater when I got cold. Overall he made like 4 trips out to get me food and water and sweater for colds and comfort.

I got to see Kylie, my best friend, and give her big hugs, which was nice. Kinda bummed I didn't get to see Kiki or my meta Leigh or Jeff. When I first got there and had anxiety, around the time when Mike joined me, Dan, one of the hosts, came up to me holding a baby quail. He held this one month old baby quail for me to pet, even after it pooped on his hand multiple times, to help my anxiety. Dan is also a wholesome human. I ended up eating and mainly staying in a perch nest in the back room for most of the party. The window was open and there were way less people, so it felt like a lot lower risk of me getting sick to spend most of my time in. A few people came in here and there but it was mainly Mike and I or at one point just me. Mainly people just coming in to use the bathroom and use the mirror for changing. There was one big chicken in the tub, Henrietta, and 8 quail. They helped me so much with my anxiety and gave me serotonin. I got brave enough to go out into the main area for 30 mins for introductions. Everyone stated their names, pronouns, how Riley changed their lives, and one kink thing they would want Riley to do to them. This party was for their birthday party but still a kink party. A lot of answers were funny, some were funny, some made me cry with the vulnerability and rawness like Riley's intro at the end about being scared they would always be a misfit. I said my name and pronouns. Talked about how they changed how I view the kink community, comfort in kink parties and how they helped make a safe space for me for when I have anxiety. Dan and Riley are truly amazing and always go above and beyond. It was nice cuddled with my stuffie on the couch being able to message Daddy a lot for comfort through the panic. It was nice being able to message and update Jay a bit before he got tired, but mainly focus on centering my brain and my connection and communication with Daddy. He felt like a good safe space and it was really nice and helped me regain trust in him after our talk about him having to disappear right after I got into deep little space last night and me being angry and hurt and scared. I had cookie cake before I left. It was weird texturely. It was layered multiple layers like a cake, but the cake layers were replaced with cookie cake. But it was good though. Got overwhelmed after introductions and felt really overstimulated. This nice human who her and her husband gave me a ride once home from those parties was really sweet. She came up to me and asked if I needed anything or any water and offered to do deep breaths with me and have me breathe with her. Which I did. Which helped center me a little bit.

I'm gonna try to redo this last bit because Tumblr is literally a cunt. The first time I submitted it I got an error message and it didn't send at all. If I hadn't copied most of this it would've been all erased. I have got to start writing these in Google note first. I was writing about Daddy splitting the ride home with me for an uber which was super sweet and built trust. I'm really mad. I had the cutest little space talk rant at the end. Tumblr deleting it all really jars me to be angry and less in little space. Anyways breathe and rewrite. Daddy helped he get home safe. And I'm really excited for this upcoming week. Toy store for toys and a play collar, build a bear, coloring, baths. Sexy time. Playing out sexual fantasies. Getting to see Daddy for the first time. Jump in his arms. Get his kisses. Be his little puddle.

Daddy telled me I getted extra gold starses because I was brave. I videoed nakey with Daddy. I got more comfortable using the the D word on video, even subconsciously slipping up some times cuz it feels so natural with him. I told him about deep sexual ddlg fantasies. I went to the party and did the thing even though I cried. I'm really so incredibly lucky and blessed. I really do have the most bestest Daddy in the whole wide lamdd. I'm so excited to see where this goes. It sucks that this will likely only be part of a week every month. But maybe we can get extra time here and there when we become an established relationship and dynamic. So excited for Daddy to take baths with me.. and use me. And I'm so excited for this journey back into little space with him.