#MY BOY COULD TELL SO MUCH ABOUT THIS!!!
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Columbo and the Knight (1984)
put me in the universe where Columbo ran through the 1980s and had a crossover episode with Knight Rider. I think they deserved it, and I am not just saying that because they're my two favorite Old Shows. @telebeast wrote a little fanfic blurb about it and I HAD to visualize it into a comic (which is also the longest comic I have finished thus far at five pages...), so writing credit goes to them.
Autism W!
#columbo#knight rider#art#michael knight#kitt#comic#highlight reel#crossover#telebeast#there are two small easter eggs here. can you find them. they were somehow not Entirely lost when i resized these for the public#this is what i mean when i say I Draw And It's Everyone Else's Problem. look at my INCREDIBLY niche crossover comic boy#if the knight rider fandom has like 12 people in it. how many of y'all have seen columbo#this comic is for like 4 people and me and phoenix are already two of them#niche is my specialty lets be real. weird niche obscure shit and ships nobody's paid attention to yet#not to suggest this is ship art. columbo has his wife and michael has his car lmfao#stylizing real people is EXTREMELY hard btw sorry for when they get off model. its partly a 'better imperfect than never finished' situatio#cant tell you how much i redrew some of these panels. weeps#this took me 2 weeks but i think i thumbnailed it all in may and the ideas been rollin around in my head since march#is anybody good at editing. please edit michael and columbo into an image together like its a screenshot. NOT generated. edited.#it would be so cool#ive drawn columbo a lot but i haven't drawn a lot of michaels. i was learning things about his outfit AS I WAS DOING THE DAMN#COLORS ON THIS. all the lines done. it was too late to change anything. i did all the lines and colored page by page#i realized my mistakes on like page 3. 1 and 2 were already done. it was Too Late.#imagine it though. them working a case together. switching between the more serious tone of columbo vs the goofier#action antics of michael and kitt. columbo being so impressed by Modern Technology. there's more i could say but phoenix may write#more of this crossover and i don't want to spoil it :'3#there's opportunity here though i swear. there's gold to be dug.#i like how kitt gets shading but columbo's junker peugeot doesn't. kitt looked wrong without any. columbo's car is matte and dirty#i also applied effects to this to make it look a little film-grainy and VHS like. some CRT TV vibes#the only question left is. did they put knight rider into columbo; or columbo into knight rider 🤔
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Scholarly peak is catching up on recent literature
#bingqiu#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#svsss#sqq#lbh#my art#which is honestly just to say that i've finished the other two print books i was reading#and am now prepared to leap feet first into svsss bk4#i succeeded in holding off for an entire two weeks. i have the conviction of a wet paper towel.#lets see bk4 was described as - what? - an ''angst and smut pile''??#i am very much looking forward to this#i was promised a story with my snake boy#because i am very much not over zhuzhi-lang's fate so this had better be A REALLY NICE HAPPY ONE FOLKS#anyway have sqq and lbh cuddling and reading as i project on them#i like to assume that as time goes on sqq is able to relax his persona a bit more around lbh#i think he should get to cuddle and bitch about shitty novels#but man sqh is really the ONLY source of any books that have an even slightly modern cadence/style i have a feeling sqq would be very keen#though if i'm being honest i really wonder if sqh could ever bring himself to write fiction again#if you're A Writer it tends to be hard to RESIST you just get an itch to tell a story#but also like... the fear that all of this could happen again... or that the characters you're creating might be REAL and SUFFERING...#yeah... i honestly suspect he can't write anymore and that it honestly probably sucks a lot... but for the sake of this joke he is :P
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mezalean smalletho won’t leave my brain
closeups
and also extra doodles because i’m going to goinsane
#my art#smallishbeans fanart#ethoslab fanart#life series au#empires smp#empires au#trafficshipping#i’m stuck in a boat help me#imso deep in smalletho hell you have no idea#i love mezalea so much you have no idea#i have so many smalletho doodles you have no idea#i could write an essay about life series joel i could write an essay about life series etho i could write an essay I COULD WRITE AN ESSAY.#the shame is i have been able to rant about my boat boy hyperfixation to exactly 0 people#damn you social anxiety. damn you#if you couldn’t tell i suck at outfit design. yet another thing i must work on#smalletho#forgot that one#somehow#oughehrgjsoxuhdgh#i lied last time apparently im still getting anxiety#im posting this now before i die okay goodbye
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"I'll make a save here and try breaking up with Astarion, just to see the dialogue- I could see him get kinda nasty about it, but I honestly don't know what to expect so---"
...............
.......
....
#-ke me back but that didn't fit#astarion#squirrel plays bg3#when i tell you i reloaded so fucking fast.....#curse my curiosity#jesus fucking christ he's so RESIGNED#it's such an “ah; there it is. yeah can't say I'm surprised but it was nice while it lasted”#it sounds a bit mean but i fully thought he'd get at least a bit nasty about it#(the breakup also doesn't seem to have any options that nets disapproval???)#(which is just..... sad)#(it'd be so much less painful if he could at least hate you for it you know)#(this boy's self-esteem is -as we say in my country- beneath the miner frog's asscheeks)#(and now i need to go spend some time kneeling on the floor sobbing please do excuse me)
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you know what, i DO want to rant about this actually.
because the more i watch 3Below, the more i'm like, you're dealing with fucking ALIENS. extraterrestrial beings. people who DID NOT COME FROM THIS PLANET. and yet everyone somehow STILL has time to make low-brow fat jokes pointed at one single funny, delightful, passionate, sometimes silly teenage character. just because being fat was a negative character trait back in the 2000's and 2010's. what the hell???
what has Toby done to deserve this?? he's literally just A Guy. a teen boy who's excited that trolls and aliens and weird stuff exists. he literally has a personality beyond being fat, but literally everyone makes jokes about it the second they get a chance. it's unfair.
he's friends with the guy who used to be the only Human Trollhunter and is now the Half-human Trollhunter. he's a redhead. he's friends with a gal who defeated a thousand-something-year-old god. he loves his nana. he likes sci-fi movies. he's an orphan. he's friends with possibly one of the Coolest Trolls Ever (in my opinion), who lives in his room together as a roommate, and they play non-violent video games together. he has braces. he's confident in himself, for the most part, besides the usual teenage insecurities. he wields an awesome cursed warhammer. he trained himself to climb through windows and it's treated casually. he has a girlfriend who's the daughter of a cop, and he fell for her when she was wearing his school's purple mole mascot costume. he has a pet gnome who has a plastic doll for a girlfriend-turned-wife. he loves the spiciest kinds of burritos he can get his hands on. he's literally befriended aliens/extraterrestrial beings/celestials.
AND HE'S TREATED, FOR THE MOST PART, LIKE A JOKE.
Everyone Shut Up About My Darling Son Toby, Who Definitely Has Done Some Things Wrong, But Has Also Made Up For Them By Literally Helping To Save The World Multiple Times (And Is Overall A Delightful Person)
#void keith talks#TOBY DID NOT DESERVE THIS SLANDER. MUCH LESS IN THE CANON MATERIALS????? SMH#as you may be able to tell. i have Feelings about this#take a shot every time they're fatphobic to toby in trollhunters or 3below & you'll probably get alcohol poisoning (DON'T ACTUALLY DO THIS)#toby. my poor boy. you deserve so much better!!#I'M MAD BECAUSE THEY LITERALLY COULD TAKE THOSE FAT JOKES OUT AND IT WOULDN'T HAVE IMPACTED-#TROLLHUNTERS OR 3BELOW OR WIZARDS AT ALL!!!!! THEY WOULD LITERALLY BE FINE WITHOUT THOSE RUDE INSENSITIVE “JOKES”. SMH#void keith rants#3below#3below tales of arcadia#3below show#trollhunters#show stuff#tv show stuff#toby domzalski#tobias domzalski
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it probably wasn't the smartest decision to start an ongoing 1000+ chapter webnovel when i know it'll consume my every waking thought but here we are
open for better quality | no reposts
#turning novel#터닝#kishiar la orr#yuder aile#when i tell you i read the manhwa in one go last night and then started reading the novel today bc commenters said it was good#and my god were they right#i'm 40+ chapters in so i've just passed where the manhwa is at rn and wow#first of all thank god there are high quality and easily accessible translations#second of all kuyu-nim has a way of making all the lines carry weight. the dialogue and body language cues especially#like i'm definitely not that far in but there are already a few lines i can point out that made my heart clench#and the tension between the two leads is so so palpable#kishiar is very enigmatic i'm very interested in finding out what he's really thinking and what his abilities are#and i really appreciate the way yuder's development is focused on him caring about others and relying on them#ok and third the fact that it's a slow burn romance but focuses heavily on the plot and politics and relationships is so good#based on the tags this could have been very tropey but they didn't go that route and i'm glad for it#in other news i'm upset about how yuder came out but i have to post him bc i will not separate them ;;;#thought kishiar would be harder to draw bc he's pretty:tm: and i struggle drawing pretty boys but yuder put me through the wringer fr#anyway!! i love them very much!! going a little insane over them as you can see!!
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Yo, I am so sick of this drawing, I just wanna post it to get rid of it lol
Happy Mermay!!
yeah, yeah, listen.
I HAD to do a Mermaid au. Technically I already did, but!
This time: I didn't have the motivation to draw Chase as one😎
I might continue with sketches of the mermaid au, but for this picture specifically I had a story planned out(you can skip this if you don't wanna hear me ramble lmao):
Chase had promised Deacon at least one book of his choosing for a reason I'm still searching for(his birthday/seeing the stress he's being put under and wanting to cheer him up without thinking it through) and after a lot of back and forth they decide to enter a book who's heroine is a hybrid mermaid princess who's kingdom was attacked by the evil and villainous siren clan. The mermaid decides to join the first pirate crew she sees and falls in love with the captain(because of course she does) and out of the kindness of his stoic heart the captain decides to help this fair maiden out.
If it sounds bad: good, I wanted to make it as clichée as possible
The mermaid princess has like a magic piece of jewelry that lets her transform between human and mermaid whenever and like 50% of the time she is somewhere underwater, perfect for Chase.
The other 50% she's being smooched up by the captian
This scene specifically was supposed to be kind of like an interrogation scene?
Buddy, either the siren queen or princess is hauled onto deck during/after an attack, maybe while the rest of the kingdom flees the queen is snatched up and spends three days and nights on deck in a goddamn barrel
Imagine the muscles cramps💀
#cinderella boy#cinderella boy webtoon#chase hollow#cinderella boy buddy#fanart#I like to imagine that the transition between human and mermaid is just one of those magical girl transformation scenes#every single time#the villains are too stunned by his beauty to attack Chase while he transforms though#can you tell I had a gacha phase off of the 'hybrid mermaid princess'?#also#did you notice how I gave Buddy that top JUST so that I could give him shoulder pants?#I love that canon fact so much#bro's insecure about his SHOULDERS#'my shoulders aren't broad enough :('#*'cough* can't relate *cough cough*
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"It will just end how it started"
#only friends the series#only friends#ofts#neo trai#mark pakin#i am living for them#glad nick found out in ep 3 and we have now a bunch of episodes of them just making everything worse for each other#nick really worked so hard on keeping boston i want to hug him#his proud smile after jerking boston off ;A;#and he tries to voice when he is uncomfortable and at the same time already realizes that boston is very much not on the same page#and my boy is already escelating listening in on the car sex#possible intended the bug for other reasons but baby - do not put yourself through hearing the whole thing in stereo....you could already#see them from the outside#have to had it to boston: he really nearly doesn't care at all about getting seen#p'jojo getting in his tweet <3#it is very telling that nick clearly knows who boston is but in his mind their encounters are just a tad more romantic with a focus on the#kissing they are doing and not so much the sex itself#fyi: i saved these gif files under the ship name 'tonnic'
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Ride 749: The last Straight Road*
(NdT.: same pun Kinaka always makes with his name and the word for straight road)
Pag 1
1: I....
3: Imaizumi-san!!
4: Go- good work!!
Good work!!
You were taking a long time for this lap
Pag 2
1: Yes, teh, I got a fl-fl-flat- my bike!!
Yessir!!
2: It's the tire!!
4: Only tires can get a flat
Ah- damn, yes, that's right
Right!!
6: I thought something like this might have happened, so I brought these
Replacement tubes, tire levers, and a pump. Use them
Pag 3
2: This is unusual!! I never thought Imaizumi-san was the attentive type – is it just for us!?
Yeah!! I thought first and second years were just not important to him....
3: You don't want to use the,?
We'll use them, thank you so much!!
4: You saved us, teh....!!
That's true
6: Ah, uhm... but..... Imaizumi-san
Earlier you said that
7: Sugimoto-san won't come”, what did you mean?
Pag 4
1: He retired
Pag 5
1: He's still displayed on the board, but
3: There's still time until midnight
If Sugimoto-kun....
4: Please leave the possibility open in case Sugimoto-kun wants to come back!!
5: Onoda insisted
6: Re... tired.....
Sugi..... moto-san....
Pag 6
1: He used up all his stamina and mental strength in his fight against Danchiku, and he was defeated
2: You didn't notice because you've been on the course the whole time
4: Ah... actually, when it got dark, Sugimoto-san and Danchiku-san passed us various times... teh
Huh!? That? So at that time-!?
5: You have no time to talk about unimportant things
As soon as you're done with the repairs, run, first years
6: Soon
Pag 7
1: Waa, ye-yes, teh, thank you for the tools
Yeah, there's still 40km
2: If we join our strengths....
Don't cooperate
5: Teh!?
7: From now on, you can't allow yourselves to run like friends
8: Huh....
Our “buddies” stickers.....!?
You have to fight
Pag 8
1: And win the last spot to be an Inter High member!!
Pag 9
1: Fa.... ight....
2: Against.... Kinaka-kun
3: Against.... Rokudai
4: 35km left!!
Gooo!! Kinakaa, Rokudaii!!
Do your best...!!
5: I feel like they'll be able to run the 1000km!!
Amazing!
Ah, but there was no distance between them just now?
Pag 10
1: Fight....
2: The spot as a regular in the two-times national champion, Sohoku....
3: I can't take it by just being friendly....!!
4: And also
5: There's Sugimoto-san's wish!!
Pag 11
1: Wa- wait, please, Imaizumi-san
But.... if in this training camp the condition to become the sixth regular was to finish the 1000km first....
2: Then why did Sugimoto-san and Danchiku-san race!?
4: I came here to give you a message from Sugimoto
5: I think, I think it's necessary, you know
Sohoku is a team that connect and support each other
6: Just like during our first year, you, Naruko, and Onoda, connected your wishes and aimed for the goal
7: And last year Kaburagi ran with Aoyagi-san and carried the team until the mountains on the third day
8: So I think we need it
9: Our third year Inter High members
Pag 12
1: Definitely need a “first year”!!
3: Even if he knew he was making his own situation worse, he thought about the best shape for the team would be
4: He accepted it, and fought
Pag 13
1: For the fifth place
3: Among the first years, those two are left, I look forward to see what they do!!
That's too much food
4: Danchiku probably understood it, too
That's why he fought with all his strength
6: Now you two have to run with the weight of those expectations on your back!!
7: Fight, against your opponent and against yourself!! Use all your strength
Pag 14
1: And pull to yourself that last jersey!!
2: Straaa-
Pag 15
1: Straight roaaad!!
2: - traight!!
3: …. ngh
Ugh.....
4: Kinaka-kun.....
5: Don't cry, Rokudai!!
Pag 16
1: What are you doing, oi!! I'll leave you behind like this!! I'll tear you off!!
If you give up, then it's lucky for me!!
2: My goal has always been the Inter High jersey!!
To get back at those senpai who made fun of me!!
3: To show it to the Onii-san who taught me how to ride bikes!!
So, for that....
6: So I'm telling you not to cry!!
Pag 17
1: But, Kinaka-kun....
It's that your “Straitgh road”, wasn't fast at all....!!
4: You knee? It's your knee, right?
Since when? Since a while ago?
5: Since when we were at about 800km
Pag 18
1: It's a race, Rokudai
2: You should have told me, teh
I didn't notice, teh!!
3: I'm such an incapable former manager, teh....
4: Since when I lost to you in the first years' race
6: I've been thinking that I would definitely not lose the next time we race
7: Even though the truth is that I don't really care about that anymore
So, once again...
Pag 19
1: It's a race, Rokudai!!
3: Let's do it, Rokudai!!
I can't, teh
4: Race me, pedal!!
I don't want to, teh....
5: Fight me!!
I won't pedal, teh
Pag 20
1: Because, if I fight you now, Kinaka-kun, I'll end up winning, teh
Pag 22
1: With that kindness of yours, support our senpai during the Inter High
#yowamushi pedal#yowamushi pedal translations#yowapeda#yowapeda manga#yowamushi pedal manga#yowamushi pedal spoilers#ride 749#the tags arent enough for the essay i want and need to write about this chapter#most painful chapter but also one of the best chapter of the whole manga imho#IVE BEEN CRYING SINCE YESTRDAY WTF WATANABE HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO MY BABIES#YOU NEED TO PAY FOR MY THERAPY NOW#kinaka and roku's relationship is probably the most wholesome in the whole manga i love them so much#and this chap HURT SO BAD OH MY GOD#kinakaaaaa you're so strong for this ;A; the way he didnt want to tell roku about his knee bc he knew that roku would break#the way he even tried to provoke him to push him to race!! and he says he didnt want to lose against him again! but!!#He actually doesnt care about that anymore!!! hes just doing this for rokudai!!!#And rokuuuu!!! baby boy ;A; hes the purest boy ever!!! He didnt want to win like this against kinaka he didnt want to leave him behind ;A;#leave me alone im gonna cry forever ;A; (no actually dont leave me alone keep me company in my suffering plz)#page 21 is forever ingraved in my soul#even tho imaizumi told them not to cooperate in the end they did support each other until the last moment ;A;#(on a lighter not im happy that we finally have a reason for the race btwn sugimoto and danchiku - they both knew the team needed a first#year* so only one of them could be on the team)
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I know how it sounds at first, but I really gotta feel bad for the boys that sacrificed edwin; I mean even the term “sacrificed edwin” paints them in a more sinister light than they really deserve– considering that wasn’t really, actually their intention.
they were bullies, they were homophobic (and/or were self loathing gay boys themselves taking it out on edwin, or were equally likely peer pressured into acting a certain way), they planned something stupid and mean to do to an innocent, anxious boy with the goal of scaring the shit out of him, all because he was effeminate and an easy target. but they didn’t know or expect any of the ritual stuff to be real. they were all laughing and joking during the ritual because it was just that to them– a joke. a cruel joke, but a joke.
teenagers can be mean and stupid and they usually regret it as adults and grow out of it / grow from it. they were stifled the chance to grow out of it, at least while alive. none of those boys deserved to be instakilled and sent to hell; they’re really not that much less deserving than edwin himself. they were all just kids, after all.
#random thought but. yeah……#I mean think about if crystal happened to be killed somehow pre-demonic intervention#she would’ve been deemed deserving of hell by the standards we’ve seen. no doubt about it. if the dragon guys were pulled to hell then yeah.#she would be as well. simply put- she was a bully#she was also a teenager. not a fully developed person. a very damaged and neglected teenager at that#it’s kinda like the criminal justice system right. it’s like. hey you really think sending them to be tormented is the most humane and#efficient way to heal these kids of what makes them act out and allow them to grow and improve?#Crystal’s such a good case to look at because she’s. well. to compare to The Good Place which you can probably already tell I’ve watched 800#times and adore with all my heart. she’s kinda the michael of the group#no one knows it at first but she’s actually kind of a terror to people most of the time. but she’s put in a situation where she#suddenly has a support system- people who care about her and want the best for her- she’s given a purpose and realizes how much better it is#to use her powers to help rather than hurt (well. sometimes helping can involve hurting but you get it)#and by the time she’s regained her memories and has a place in the agency it’s much easier to reflect on her life and be like huh!#this system kinda fucking sucks!#not that edwin wasn’t an example unto himself but he was a ‘clerical error’ not a ‘rightfully’ condemned person#with his situation someone could argue that the problem isn’t with the system being wack as a whole- it should just be maintained better so#these ‘errors’ don’t happen and all the good kids go to their afterlives and the Bad Evil Kids go to hell.#yes yes I know they’re not in hell forever (hopefully) but uhh Simon was still there for over a century and for fucking What?#gay self-loathing and catholic guilt? his intentions were clearly not Truly Evil and more than anything he seems to have been punished using#how much he hated himself for being gay and how guilty he felt for it all. like shit aren’t those feelings enough of a punishment? if he had#lived through that ritual and edwin hadn’t– do you think he would’ve been Okay? I think it would’ve crushed him. chronically#man. anyway#this was an especially long ramble huh#rambling#edwin#edwin payne#dead boy detectives
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jason after meeting roy as the red hood: what are you doing here? aren’t you one of dick’s loser simps or something?
#dc comics#dc universe#dcu#batman#red hood#jason todd#jason peter todd#jason was never the angry robin#roy harper#arsenal#dick is the perfect man imo and deserves to have people simping over him#however that won’t stop his little brother from judging them#but not in a you can do better than dick way but in a dick can do so much better than you way#jason at any given moment in time: this is why donna will forever be my fav titan#it’s not just him tho it’s the rest of the batkids as well!#dicks love interests could be saying hi and the batkids (+ bruce) are cutting them off and telling them they’re not good enough for dick#bruce is the most vocal about this btw#that’s his precious baby boy
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Prism's concept art has been. Deeply on my mind. They had some killer ideas for her and ummm.....sobs in my hands. I love her?
#sometimes i forget i like markers then i draw in markers and im like woah! these are fun!#idk it's the closest i can make my traditional look like digital lmao#ALSO can you tell I LOVE doing line art because. I love doing lineart#im really happy with this.... i have a shitpost idea of the mind rn but i also wanna draw her in the lab coat#she could slay in anything I feel#also! new sketchbook!! im yet to make a sappy post about ny old one but yeah i had to hand it it on thursday of the first day of my art exam#im hyped about this one though i really like it so far auuu <- still on the front pages#best eay to break in a new sketchbook! draw the fictional woman youre head over heels for!!!#[agent moose's art]#i expect you to die#ieytd#roxana prism#robutler#<- ohb big boy tags im happy with her..#i was fighting for ny life trying to figure out what colour to do the trousers though#but it worked out i feel#i also am somewhere in the middle abt the skintone for her because likeeee okay i do have a darker marker HOWEVER it's got too much of -#- a red tint to it and i did a loose doodle with it before for her and it just. didn't look right#so i used a ligher one but built it up#it looks darker in person and tbf i do edit my photos so they're less dull
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the thing about romcoms is just- it's never meant to be 'is it believable?' but instead 'do you believe it?' do you believe these two characters are actually falling in love with each other??? do you believe their chemistry??? do you believe whatever obstacle is thrown in their way is legitimately something that might keep them apart for a time and not something that could be solved with one conversation?? do you believe that they believe they need to fake date for this very specific reason??? do you believe the reason why they're 'enemies' at the start, no matter how silly a misunderstanding it may be??? do you believe the grand romantic gesture fits the characters and is actually how one character would show their love to the other?? like!!!! it's about empathy and authenticity and feeling what the characters feel so strongly that even if it's a trope or a cliché it doesn't matter because you believe it
#this is what separates a good romcom from a bad romcom for me#if the conventions of the genre are used in a way that feels authentic to the characters then it'll never feel cheesy#one of my biggest pet peeves is some of the romcoms of the last decade who have this real 'we're not like other romcoms' energy#where they try to act like they're Different and move away from the usual tropes but it's shit bc that's not the point!!!!#those tropes and conventions are staples of the genre for a reason#it's how you utilise them and incorporate them that matters#like fuck me i hate action movies but i know if i go see one there's a 99% chance there'll be a car chase scene#bc that's usually a staple feature of an action movie and i mean idc but that's fine bc i know it has a function in the story to increase#the tension#and even at that someone who really loves action movies could probably tell me the difference between a good car chase scene & a subpar one#in the same way that just saying something is fake dating doesn't automatically make it good#but if i believe it and i'm in it with the characters? oh boy i'm about to feel so dELIGHTED for the next 90 minutes thank you so much#anyway i'm rewatching the lost city and every second of this movie is so silly in a fun way and fantastical but oH BOY DO I BELIEVE IT#mine
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.
#blocks an anon that says they reported my blog for promoting ‘modern day slavery’ and an anon ragging on all 5 of the boys also disappears#shocking 😱#the modern day slavery thing is because of the dynamics of my marriage which....#say a lot about your ability to understand and respect different relationships#or possibly just speak to the truth about the anon's maturity#anyway my husband ordered me a sourdough breakfast sandwich from dunkin today and is going to eat the bacon#because my autism makes it so I struggle a lot with food but the number one part of our power exchange is he takes care of me#even when it comes to my 'weird' eating habits which literally any autistic person can tell you comes with a whole host of shame#but he helps me through every fucking step#i truly try not to brag too much about how good I have it relationship wise but genuinely GET YOU A LOVE LIKE OURS SORRY NOT SORRY#best friends since high school#ride or dies since high school#we hadn't talked for over a year and when his life started to implode back in 2008 i was THE ONLY person he knew he could trust
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i never ever cry in front of anyone ever but there was this boy i was OBSESSED with in primary school when i was like seven years old because he was the fastest boy in the class and he had cool spiky hair and i always thought it was a crush until i came out and realised it was gender envy of some form and today my friend out of the blue told me that i look like him and we looked at his instagram together and i actually do. i look almost exactly like him. and i cried like an absolute wanker because i’ve been so miserable my whole life being perceived entirely the wrong way and i went home today and looked at myself and realised i look like the boy i always wanted to be when i was a kid. and whenever i feel bad about myself i get to remind myself that i look like him so i shouldn’t feel bad because back then i couldn’t have ever dreamed of getting to look like this. and t will only make it better and even though the idea of starting it is still so scary to me i keep having moments like this that make me realise how good it’s going to be even if some of it will suck. i always focus on all of the ways my transition has gone and will go wrong and i forget that it’s going to go right in a lot of ways too
#i remember what this boy looked like when he started getting spots and what he sounded like when his voice started breaking#and it makes me so excited even for the parts of t that everyone says are ‘bad’#my identity is so much more binary than i tell myself it is. i play it down because being a fully binary Guy who wants to be purely masc is#a lot harder to break to my mother who is devastated even at the thought of me being a masculine woman#i’ve been pretending for a while that i’m more ‘in the middle’ than i really am because of that#but moments like this always remind me that i know exactly what i want to be and what i want to look like#and it’s the exact opposite of everything my mother wants me to be#this shit is going to be Hard. and i don’t expect my mother will stick around the further into my transition i get#which is so unbearable to me that i try not to think about it. i just can’t go back into the closet even for her#i was trying to force myself to do that before xmas and that’s what made me attempt and end up coming out to her#but i didn’t tell the full truth i just said i hate being feminine and i hate being a girl#i couldn’t bring myself to say the rest and i don’t know if i’ll ever say any of it to her#i wish i had a therapist so i could talk about all this as i’m working through the beginning of transition but. oh well
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sooooo... *twirls her hair* how many asks should i send until kuwagami art. jk as well. the real question will be: does it happen often that someone else’s art inspires you? in fandom spaces specifically
well you see it’s like a loyalty card program, every 10 asks or so you get a complimentary kuwagami
just kidding you can just breathe in my direction and I’ll be tempted to draw them. kuwagami blast! (you've caught me on a... just okay art day lol)
(people still like kabedons, right?)
anyway for my actual answer: in terms of direct inspiration, it doesn't really happen much? the last two times i did art directly based on someone else's work is probably this one from this fic, and also that time i drew art of someone else's judgment au. oh! and there's that moriohpsycho art based on this comic! (filthyguts' work is so very. hgngngghh. very good.) nothing else really comes to mind, and when i think of the other things i've been into recently there hasn't been as much opportunity for that to happen...
flex and herds = strong fixation but lmao. almost nobody else made stuff about them. nobody is surprised umineko = surprisingly i don't read much umineko fanfiction? and in terms of illustration, i certainly picked up imagery and indirect inspiration but nothing concrete enough for me to give an example... now that i think about it, i did once draw andromalius from redaction/sunny, but that was years ago, and also mostly because i was acquainted with the writer. ...i don't have that artwork on hand right now death note = didn't really get involved with the fandom + i enjoyed my own ideas well enough! ...i can't recall if i drew long-hair-L art before or after seeing other artists do it. and as for everything else the same kind of reasoning applies. didn't really get involved with the fandom or wasn't really compelled to make art in response to stuff i saw, or i just don't remember anymore.
buuuuuuut if we're opening this up to just... pulling ideas from other people? then yeah, all the time, though that kind of goes without saying when you have a creative hobby. ...it's probably going to be hard to come up with examples of this since it's more ambiguous.
there's uhhhhhh... kuwana listens to nickelback which was a @/four-white-trees invention, wasn't it? (EDIT: and @/overdevelopedglasses!) (not tagging in this post so he doesn't feel obligated to read my big ass ask responses 💀) as of writing this, it's not posted but i did end up making kuwagami art based on a nickelback song so. yknow. there's that LMAO
for sawashiro and arakawa, i do sometimes go reference @/todayisafridaynight 's art to help me with my own. ("how did he draw this part of the suit? oh, like that huh? hmm" <- this kind of thing)
and um. i'm not trying to pander to you (at least not this time), but genuinely it's one of the few examples that come to mind at this moment. but when i was writing my first kuwagami fic, i could feel the influence of the ever-changing on my brain... was turning over some of your ideas there...
you remember this? (you even pointed it out in your comment on my fic, and i should've said something then, but whatever i'm saying it now)
that was absolutely because of this
(obligatory poke at anybody else reading this post that you can read passthroughtime's fic here.)
so, um. yeah. not really sure what else to add to that. pretty self evident i think. (i'm always talking about the ever-changing but i don't think i can overstate the impression it left on me at the time)
anyhow there aren't really any other examples off the top of my head! these are all recent examples so they're not so difficult to recall, but there are probably others i've forgotten...
#jitxt#started writing this unsure if i could give many examples and i ended up with more than i expected. nice!#sunny is a very good piece of umineko writing and i should reread it with the author's notes toggled on. and also read redaction#“shouldn't you have read redaction first” n-no. shut up! (besides i think renall said it was fine)#nobody remind me of that 20k note post that's just an uncredited screenshot of sunny. it'll piss me off#as cosmic balance i ought to shill sunny as much as possible#anyway uhhhhhh. the everchanging.#i am awful about receiving compliments (i never know how to respond aside from a rehearsed “thank you”) but i sure am great at giving them!#apologies if i'm laying it on too thick but#1. i am being truthful and#2. i figure it's reparations for all the time i spent as a lurker on the kuwagami ao3 tag#the explosion in my brain when i realised that “the nice person who leaves lots of tags on my kuwagami art”#and “the person who wrote that REALLY FUCKING GOOD FIC” were one and the same. crazy. and now we are mutuals ❤#it is a little funny thinking of when i'd read your and four-white-trees' work before meeting you#real life foreshadowing for me meeting you both....#i still have these discord messages of me telling a friend about both your works#basically: (reading an update to the everchanging) wow that was depressing (reading a joke in four-white-trees' fic) nevermind i'm good now#i ought to reread the everchanging and take detailed notes on all the parts i like#just so you know your impact on my brain lol#kuwana calling yagami a pretty boy and meaning it sincerely oh my GOD. rewired my brain
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