#MISCOMMUNICATION LETS GOOOO
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littlecrittereli · 19 hours ago
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Hey I'm writing a Wild Kratts x Avatar the last Airbender fanfic and a lot of inspo for Chris and Martins relationship comes from your guardian au! I was wondering if you had any things to keep in mind when writing them or little things about their relationship in your own au that I can steal lol
Well in guardianship AU specifically their dynamic is a little different from canon because their personalities are a little different too (stemming from the fact that their parents died and Martin has been raising Chris)
In guardianship AU, Martin is a lot more mature because he HAD to be. He frets over every little detail when it comes to Chris because not only is he worried about keeping custody of him, but also wants to ensure that Chris has as normal and healthy of a childhood as possible. He wants Chris to be able to be a kid for as long as possible, because Martin was robbed of that the moment their parents died. He's also very self conscious about his qualifications to be raising Chris. He's worried that he's not doing a good job, and Chris would be better off under someone else's care, and Martin sometimes thinks of himself as selfish for not being willing to give up custody even if it would be "better" for Chris.
Chris on the other hand, is not as naive as Martin likes to think. He knows about their struggles despite how hard Martin tries to hide them. He thinks of himself as mature and desperately wishes people would treat him like it. He sees Martin struggle for years after their parent's death, and wants nothing more than to help somehow, but Martin would never let him. So he gets angry and lashes out sometimes because of the restrictions Chris feels he's under. He's very aware that he can be a handful. He also believes that Martin would be doing far better in life if he had just given up custody. Chris is too scared Martin would go through with it if he ever mentioned it though. So they never talk about it. All Chris wants is Martin to be happy, he just doesn't realize he already brings that in Martin's life.
Basically they don't confide in each other like in canon. Mostly because of the age difference and the fact that Martin is in a parental role for Chris. They're not as close with open communication. They still care about each other more than anything, but with Martin's feelings of inferiority, and Chris' insecurities, they both assume the other would be better off without them. And those unspoken fears causes a lot of tension.
Of course they will work it out when Chris gets a bit older and is able to express himself properly, and Martin will feel less obligated to shield him from everything... but for now that's about how it is
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ambeauty · 8 months ago
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The most obvious and consistent issue with Sydney and Carmy is their inability to communicate honestly about what they are feeling when they feel it. Instead of telling Sydney that he needs her and that he doesn’t ever want to lose her or for her to leave him.. he drafts up a marriage contract partnership agreement. And to apologize for dumping the entire opening of their restaurant on her and to let her know that she’s all he ever thinks about… he gifts her a custom made designer chef coat🤣😩😭
This man is so fucking stupid! I CAN NOT!
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bl3pwastaken · 5 months ago
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Trafalgar D Water Law X reader End
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It's the home stretch baabbyy let's fuckin goooo. Couldn't sleep last night again so I figured I'd go ahead and finish this chapter and get it posted. Prepare for angsty fluff
TW and CW: Hanahaki disease, Angst, Hurt/comfort, mentions of blood, Eustass Kidd typical language, miscommunication, Kidd maliciously complying at Law's expense to the chagrin and humor of everyone but him
Part 1, Part 2
A Dive Through Crystal Waters
Humid and hellishly fucking muggy. Those words were the perfect descriptors for how the air made everyone’s clothing stick uncomfortably to their skin. The harnesses donned by now both the Kidd and Heart pirates doing very little to help alleviate the growing swelter of heat. Kidd made a point he’d only agree to follow through unless Law and his crew also wore the very same leather and metal as his crew if and he quotes,” You shits wanna stay safe” were the words Eustass said if Law’s memory served him correctly.  He remembers how the most devious of shit eating grins painted it’s way on the bastard’s face as he said it, his arms obnoxiously crossed in cocky confidence and malicious mischief. It seemed like Trafalgar wasn’t the only one with plans, and he was right in his assumption. Upon putting the blasted thing on aboard the top deck of the Polar Tang, Kidd had the great idea to make use of his devil fruit, a weird buzzing sensation coming from the large metal ring on Law’s chest suddenly yanking him forward, face slamming smack into the wooden boards of the top deck floor. 
It took Shachi, Penguin Bepo and his beautiful sweet girlfriend piling on top of him to not try and kill Kidd on the spot, who victoriously cackled with satisfaction at his “totally harmless joke” and “Oh lighten the fuck up lover boy”. The asshole leaned over the railing of The Victoria Punk, fist hitting the side railing in his fit of devilish giggling. 
As far as (Y/n) knew, the two band of misfit pirates were heading to some island and they needed her skills and knowledge as a botanist to steer everyone clear of any greenery related danger, while they were to make their way to the heart of the island to procure something found near the mythrill deposits that Kidd seemed to be concerningly jazzed about. Which honestly was fine and dandy by her, but what really made her wonder was why Law would willingly get dragged into this, and what he wanted out of this little exploration of a highly perilous island, with how paranoid he could be about the health and well being of his crew. She knew him at least well enough to know by nowadays standards for a fact that part of Law hadn’t changed and was very much alive and well, especially to put up with this for no reason and helping Kidd for funsies. 
The island coming into view really sank in just how far in deep shit it would probably be to even set foot on it let alone just sail and anchor down off shore. Clouds violently swirled in the sky in randomly scattered areas, spots either covered in dark treacherous stormy ridden clouds, other speckled spots only sporting quaint fluffy cotton like clouds with light gracefully shining down to the thickets of woods and forest below. There were strangely scattered cliffs and mountain ranges, a strange dip further inland that was just out of sight, hidden behind trees from view.
The first few sandy steps on the shore bank, a bone chilling shrill echoed about, the sound seeming like it came from something very big, and very angry is what greeted them. Sounds of something akin to breaking shattering glass and crystal sang in resonance in the distance. A mix of determined and intimidated faces mixed around the crow of pirates, Law, Kidd and a select few the only ones seemingly unaffected. 
“Listen up! Trafalgar over here has the coords of why we’re all here in this hellhole. You follow my damn orders if you want to live. The animals here are apparently a bit hungry, so give ‘em hell if any of them decide they’re itchin’ for a fight, and follow what the botanist has to say. According to dipshit here there are plenty of daisies and pansies ready to eat you up just as quick. To keep it short and sweet don’t be dumbasses and let’s kick some ass, level whatever gets in our way to the ground!” Eustass Captain Kidd’s booming voice rang over the crowd, and was met with a just as loud,”Yes boss!” from the Kid Pirates and that’s all it took for the rowdy bunch to be on the ready for the trek ahead. Everyone of the Heart Pirates aside from (Y/n) having already been clued in on the details of what to expect, the only instructions she was given were to point out plant related harm, and if needed use what flora was around to hopefully counteract any unsavory effects they had.
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Night had swallowed them whole, everyone drenched in a gross mix of the random rainfall and sweat. It had been eerily quiet for the past few hours only having run into a handful of mishaps. The first being a rather small and adorable white bunny, that upon trying to devour Wire’s leg, its little beady red eyes hateful and starved, that mayhaps it wasn’t so very adorable afterall. The second, being a small pack of strange looking quadrupedal animals looking somewhere in between feline and canine with scaled legs and dribble that burned and sizzled on contact with the dirt below, now in an unconscious half dead pile some miles back. The next being a small slew of large plants either latching onto or snapping at and attempting to swallow Penguin and Shachi. The last attempt being made at Kidd when he defied the small woman’s warning to watch his step around a particularly feisty giant species of Venus Flytraps. The botanist, already feeling particularly worn out from her mysterious and in her opinion ironic illness, flowers killing a botanist from the inside out and all, was even more mentally drained with her new task of keeping the Kidd pirates(and Penguin and Shachi unfortunately) alive and listening to her directions and advice. 
Ferns crunched under foot, the occasional snap a twig joining in on the symphony of the crisp crinkling, were all that were heard in the dense wood. Something definitely wasn’t right. The annoying yell of bugs, the squawking of birds, and even the assault of plants had all come to a stop. The only sign of movement and sentient life being everyone present. Then there it was. A loud popping noise. First one then, many, many more all at once.
“Those are trees falling. That’s too many to be a coincidence.” Her nervous frantic eyes  searched the crowd, looking for her boyfriend and Captain. Finding him looking in the direction of the sounds, somewhere off to the northwest, he grabbed hold of Kikoku, and now a new buzzing sensation coming from the metal ring of her harness, she felt frozen in place. It was mere seconds after she felt it. It being not far off from a musky scented strong gale of wind from the trees behind, the popping sounds of creaking trees knocked over rumbled the ground she stood on. Turning around felt like a mistake, really wishing she hadn’t, she was met face to face with the crouched face of what looked like a fur covered wyvern, blizzard like chilly clouds of its breathe huffed out of the slits on it’s snout, white fur standing on end, proudly stating it’s threatening presence. 
A rumbling chitter shook through the beast, and right down (Y/n)’s spine. With a turn as quick as she could muster, she made a mad dash for the one place she would hope to be her safety by Law’s side, screaming his name desperately. Only to be shattered as he himself dashed right past her, the buzzing of the O-ringed harness throwing her body into the rough hold of Eustass. In the middle of the battle cries, and screeching growls from the monstrous animal, she felt the all too familiar pain in her chest again. This wasn’t how this was supposed to go. Law was supposed to have her, not Kidd. He wasn’t supposed to rush past her, that was supposed to be literally anyone else but him. The pain scorched her chest, her organs on their way to snapping apart like twigs, to break apart and make way for the blossoming garden of feeling useless, unloved, ignored, and lonely. Coughing shook her body in the firm tight hold of the rival captain, blood pouring from her plush lips and nose like plague filled water, full blooms of Jasmines delicately pouring just as steady onto her and onto the chest of Kidd. For once, Eustass Kidd stood in horror as the small frail woman in his arms spittled blood and flowers of all things onto them both. Struggling with deciding whether to gape at you, or gape at Law, dropping her onto someone else to kill this shithead of a monster, creature whatever the fuck to get Law over here and solve this, or literally anything at all.  
“Trafalgar, this is serious!” tattooed hands gripped Kikoku with skilled ease and strength, the blade holding firm in it’s place against a clawed icy foot. “I’m a little busy right now, can’t your shit wait!?” Too busy to turn around to see what he was causing a commotion about.
“Wait if you want, but (Y/n)’s kinda fuckin’ dying in my arms right now!” It all was so loud. The ground was shaking so much, and to the botanist it was almost like the vibrations were lulling her to sleep. She felt a rough shove into something warm, providing her further a sick comfort, the blood, water and sweat of her shirt having done nothing but freeze her down to her very soul. Her body was shivering from blood loss. The yells, and screams ebbed and faded. One stuck out though. One familiar voice whispering about her head, the only thing keeping her present. One that made the pain worse, more agonizing. Familiar arms cradling her weak dying body closer.
“Fuck don’t die on me now. Not when I’m so close- when we’re so close. I refuse to have the woman I love more than anything else in this fucked world die.” Jasmines spewed from her lips, something wet and warm pebbled on her face, eyes too weak to open and look at the source, barely able to register a whimpering voice. “I love you so much, please don’t leave me here.” This was Law’s voice. A scream barreled from (Y/n) as her body expelled whatever it could of the flowers from her quaking form, roots and vines tearing from organ tissue. Horrific was what this was for Law to see. Less and less blood, but more and more roots, leaves, flowers and vines were spewing from the love of his life’s mouth. He recognized this instantly as Hanahaki. 
He realized many things in that moment, time feeling like it had slowed. Gone was the wrathful aggressive blaring of Kidd and they’re crews' battle cries. Gone was the shrill of the beast. Gone was everything in the world, but the both of them. Caught up in his workaholic nature, he had neglected his relationship, he neglected his best friend, he neglected her. He was the one that brought this on them, on her, and all because he said nothing to her. His decision to keep her in the dark, and then spending less and less time with her, listening to her less in favor of searching for clues left her love feeling unrequited. He realized there as the beast fell and shook the ground, surrounded by the sound of victory cheers that it took more than the label of a relationship and just feeling love wasn’t enough. He had shown everyone, but her his love for her, and gave her few words as supplementation for his lack of action if any at all. 
“I love you so fucking much, please don’t go. I’m so sorry.” 
Then gentle and warm dark encapsulated her mind.
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She could feel the bob and sway of her body move. She was warm, so very warm and it felt like home. Her arms and legs hugging into it, her face nuzzling into the back of something equally warm, something tickling her nose. Going to rub at the top of her head to ease the pounding headache ravaging her skull, instead of her fingers touching her hair, they ran across soft fluffy fabric and down onto the brim of the hat on her head. Prying loopy eyelids open, she saw black curls, and a rather familiar hood. The voices of the Kidd Pirates close but distant echoed in across rocky walls and ceiling, stalactites and stalagmites bouncing the sound around and further into what she now saw was a cave. Beautiful almost crystalline metal ore glowed in the sea of mythrill. Law gently jostled his hold on her thighs to ensure her place on his back. Carrying the Polar Tang’s botanist with as much care as he could, nerves shot as he made steady calculated steps forward. That’s when they both saw it. The silly little flower that started this whole mess. Law honestly disturbed at the sight of another flower, and (Y/n) in her giddiness could put the excitement of a child in a candy shop to shame.
She tried her best to make a move to get down from where she was perched on the back of her lover, wanting to rush over and examine the Holy-Light Peony, it’s petals giving off the faintest of blue and golden hued glow. Law on the other hand only was having none of that, tightened his grip, even going as far as further leaning forward using the weakened state of her body to keep in her place.
“You lost a lot of blood out there Sicky. There’s no way in hell I can let you walk on your own until you recover.” His voice was horse and rough like gravel, showcasing against his will how much he strained it.
“But-”
“Doctor’s and Captain’s orders.” Well that was that she supposed. A small pout on finding it’s way on her features, until it faded to something more sad and gentle.
“Hey dummy.”
“Hmm?”
“I forgive you.” The last few steps were quiet, a sense of strange calm overcoming the young couple as they were nearing the gentle glow of the lone peony. With a crouch to the ground and awkward maneuvering, Law managed to place (Y/n) down right front and center, pulling a small bag from his hoodie to place next to her filled with a few of her supplies. She made to look at him from her spot on the crystal like floor, eyes meeting and baring a question for him.
“How did you-” It was her own turn to cut herself short this time around. The realization hit her like a truck, or even as far as getting body slammed by a sea-king. This was what he was doing this whole time. This was why. The deflated grief filled smile being all the answer she really needed. She understood. “Thank you Law.” Dropping to his knees beside her as he did his best to help however he could, listening intently on whatever directions were thrown his way.  For what felt like the first time in forever they were truly present with one another, and it felt patient, gentle, warm and kind.
“Of course love.” The moment was warm indeed.
Tagged as promised<3:
@metonimia-de-bellota @true-king-of-rats
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cheesecakeislazy · 6 months ago
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Disventure Camp Episode 18 Spoilers!!
Basically just my thoughts on the episode-
Ally you dumb bitch, Jake literally gave both of his hair bands to Connor- YOU SAW IT. HOW COULD HE HAVE AN EXTRA ONE??
Although not all the blame on Ally for that miscommunication, Connor should’ve talked to Ally immediately. Explained that it was probably Riya, or literally anything instead of staying silent??
Despite my personal beef with Ally for fucking with my boy Jake, I will admit that she’s a better character than Riya… This episode alone made me dislike Riya. I don’t hate Riya, she doesn’t make me scowl or laugh at her pain. I simply dislike Riya and Ally.
As cute as it is that Jake had to dress up a mannequin like Tom- he should’ve had to dress it up like Aiden. Also that looked like season one Tom? I could be wrong though..
Connor doing the exact same fucking thing as last season?? It just seems repetitive..? I love Connor being selfless, but I just kinda dislike the fact he chose to get out like that. I think it would’ve been cooler to get everyone else to vote for him and he votes for himself? I dunno..
I was VERY neutral during this episode. Connor got out? That’s unfortunate but oh well didn’t think he would win.. Ally and Jake are beefing? What’s new.. Riya is being a bitch? Connor please punch her.
Connor needs to stop being such a gentleman, and needs to go into his wife beater arc- please I would pay actual money for Connor to beat the ever living shit out of Riya. (Pls don’t beat yo wives)
I really related to Jake when he insulted Connor in the heat of the moment- I’ve been there before. You insult someone you really care about without thinking because you’re just upset. I’ve done that exact thing and ruined a friendship over it. So I really hope my boy Jake wins this for us!
This is a really underwhelming final 3 tbh.. the only person I care about is Riya. It’s literally Ally vs Jake. Because if Riya wins this? The fans will not be happy at all!!! I really want Jake to win this, for Miriam, for Tom, for his boyfriend best friend Aiden, and for Ashley.
So far the episodes have peaked during the Aiden elimination episode.. 😭
Derek and Trevor kiss? Ngl I never shipped it, I made jokes like “oh they fucking” but I never shipped it. It’s cute tho tbh.. the way Derek looked afterwards? Bro was like “Damn.. that shit better than Kristal..” Derek is finally coming out of the closet!! Let’s goooo!!!
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honeekyuu · 5 months ago
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PART TWOOOOO
11, 13, 22, and 30!!!!!
LETS FUCKING GOOOO
self-ship questions here!
11: What’s a song that describes their relationship? Or, what’s the song that they’ve deemed “their” song?
bro this is so hard,,, is it lame to say Talk Too Much by Renee Rapp LMAOOOOOOO maybe Kids by MGMT?? Sun by Two Door Cinema Club??? i feel like if it's describing the relationship, then Talk Too Much is the one because we're both stupid idiots who yap anxiously and the pining stage was real rough,,, but the VIBES of Kids and Sun are right,, like that coming of age running through the street together laughing in the middle of the night energy,,,, thats the right feeling
13: What’s their opinions on PDA?
we both like PDA real bad. im a little more socially aware of the people around me, but suna is violently "i dont see it and i dont care"-coded. he's the clinger, the hand holder, the kisser in the middle of the street type, and im that but toned down about 6 notches because thats embarrassing as hell LMAOO
22: How do they apologize after arguments?
i am simply too anxious to leave arguments unfinished LMAO when i fuck up, im pinning him to the fucking ground until he hears me out. theres usually crying involved bc im a sensitive girl. it'll last a couple days, where even after he forgives me, im really sensitive to all his moods and reactions to things, and i try to give him space so that im not annoying, but he thinks it's annoying when i do that so,,,,, i live a complicated life. i just sit in a corner and wait until he yells at me for being anxious and then i cry some more in his lap while he laughs and makes fun of me. when he fucks up, he apologizes and then waits about twenty minutes and then apologizes again, because i was dissociating and unresponsive the first time. theres a lot of cuddling involved, a lot of skinship and touching and holding me and mumbling in my ear that hes sorry and wont do it again and asking if i want him to buy me food (i do). we're both incapable of holding grudges
30: Free space! Say something about this ship that you want to say!
whenever girls hit suna up on IG or tiktok or literally anywhere, his first reaction is always to go "bruh." and when i ask "what??", he just shows me the message. there is ultimate trust in this relationship, no miscommunication about literally anyone outside of it. he shows me the message and says "bruh" and thats it. he usually responds with "my girlfriend eats people" and then blocks them. if im not with him when it happens, he waits until we're together again and then goes "OH!! YOU WILL NEVER BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED TODAY" and then shows me the message
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finalgale · 2 months ago
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Hi! A, L & T for the ask meme?
Omigosh TIME WHERE DOES IT GO?! ANYWAYS!
HELLO! Sure! Thank you for the ask and let’s goooo!
A: Of the fanfic you’ve written, which is your favourite and why?
I don’t know if it’s obvious but honestly, it’s Kindness Rings True.
I’m so proud of it and I love it so much. Like, not only did I finish a multichapter story, which has never happened before Imma be honest, but I got to turn Sanji into a fox!! Which is something that I really wanted to do. I worked so hard on the story, making things connect and building up the lore, while also using what Oda had given us and playing around with it to form this story. And it was really self indulgent, I had no idea if people were going to like it (I literally thought people would be mad about the part that Sanji turns into a fox and it’s legit everyone’s fave part lol WHOOPS!)
When I first started to read One Piece fics, there weren’t a lot of action/adventure stuff, or like story stuff that I was looking forward to finding, and even fewer that were completed. So I ended up making one to satisfy myself, and I’m glad others enjoyed it just as much as me writing it!
And I was so happy making the fox siblings (which used to be just one fox! And their shrine was in a cave whenI first started making the story. Was also scared no one would like them. They’re not OCs they were just for the story but sometimes having any new character can be difficult) and giving Sanji some good hurt that I really wanted to see happen. It was also just so much fun having everyone interacting with each other. One of my favourite things about One Piece is those big, or even small, manga panels where so much is happening and it’s alive (Like in Skypiea, Sanji’s talking and his head is turned to Nami or someone, but is still throwing Zoro his supper bowl while Zoro reacts. It’s not at all the main focus, not part of the plot and doesn’t have to be happening at all, but it’s that little detail I love and wanted to try and capture, and still do, in written format)
I kinda basically wanted to make a One Piece movie, and was so happy with what I accomplished. It holds a special place in my heart!
L: Which of your fanfics was the most emotionally challenging to write?
That is a toughy but I think it has to be Stigma.
When I first started to think of the idea, the end result was the Straw Hats burning down the town and enjoying sweet revenge, and I wanted that so badly, it would feel like great and cathartic because why not? Sometimes that’s how it feels when someone hurts you. But kinda like in the story, where everyone is in the aquarium planning this revenge a voice inside my head was like…would Sanji be okay with this? And I had Brook voice that same thing. Because, it can’t be that easy to destroy lives. And then trying to figure out a solution where there can still be revenge, but also dignity? or not taking it to far? Formed, which was to get all the Straw Hats hated the same, because they honestly don’t care if they’re hated.
It was also hard because Sanji was hurting, and generally you want to open that hurt to create that comfort, like let us love you, let Sanji talk and just get that hug, and while it hurt to not just let that happen, it was necessary. It was a big wrestling match in my mind with what I wish could happen and what should happen. I’m glad I didn’t listen to the voice that wanted to burn the town to ashes, because I think it made it a lot more compelling.
T: Any fanfic tropes you can’t stand?
GOOD QUESTION!
The only one that really comes to mind is Miscommunication? If it’s done really well, it could be very interesting but a lot of the time I feel like it’s there to have some weird drama for a short amount of time where it could be solved but the characters just shift into a weird oocness when it happens for the sake of plot? If that makes sense. There can be better ways to make things move forward.
Thank you for the questions! This was a lot of fun!
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thelovelybitten · 2 years ago
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vera’s first watch of south park — season five (part 2)
i am sick and in need of a giggle so this is WHAT I WANT
EPISODE 6:
OH GOD IT BURNS, IT BURNS
SCREAM FOR ME BITCH
LMAOOOO ICONIC
wait what
WHAT
WHAT THE FUCK
no cartman NO STOP UR EIGHT
this is so awks i can’t ew
BUTTER’S, CRAIG’S AND TOLKIEN’S FAMILY TOGETHER AW
and one other finaly idk yet ig oops
WAIT TWEEK’S PARENTS THAT’S IT
STANLEY NO
MY SON KNOWS BETTER STOP IT RN JKFDSKJBGJSD
stan i s2g
NO STOP IT STANLEY MARSH U ARE BEING BAD RN
sharon and randy being parents as they should
oh god sex ed
this is very traumatizing
I LEARNED ABT THIS IN AN ALL GIRLS SCHOOL OKAY IT’S SO AWK
STAN RLY CALLED MR. MACKEY OUT DBGKSBDGKBDSKBS
girls slayed
AYO LADY RELAX
girls are traumatized
stan: “HEY WENDY WHAT DID U GUYS LEARN IN SEX—“
*cue girls screaming and running away*
I’LL TAKE MY STENDY CRUMBS okay
WENDY YELLING “STAY AWAY FROM ME, STAN” HURTS
mini stendy conflict
god miscommunication does wonders huh
boys on the move 2 get protection
not the mackey/choksondik tension
NO NOT Y’ALL MAKING BUTTERS PUT IT ON
CARTMAN SDJBGSBDBGK
tweek coming in CLUTCH
*it does nothing*
i just can’t imagine 8 year olds learning this shit
like wtf
NOT STAN MAKING EVERYONE WEAR ONE
kindergarteners ??????@#?@?@?
LET THEM FINGERPAINT
garrison ?!@?@?@!@ WHAT THE FUCK
not the girls watching a video of childbirth… i’d be scarred too
the random video of a calf birth at the end??
STOP THIS MACKEY NONSENSE
CARTMAN BYUVUYUY
KYLE STOP IT’S NOT THAT DEEP
oh fuck here comes the boys vs girls war
BEBE SLAYED KILLER BOOMERRANG
rip kenny tho
hc: bebe is good at karate/taekwondo
makes clyde/kyle/kenny go wild for her
anyways end hc
ew EW EW WHAT THE FUCK
SKIPPED THIS SHIT BC CRINGE AND NASTY ASS FREAKS
boys vs girls WAR BABY LET’S GOOO
oh shit OH SHIT
FUCK THAT WAS WHACK
chef so real rn
WHAT SDKJBJKDSBGJKDSBKSD
EXCUSE ME
STANLEY MARSH.
STAN: “well, i guess we have a while to wait before we worry about sex and diseases, huh, Wendy?”
SO THIS KID SAYING THE TWO GONNA BANG AT 17
put that in my hc book rn
stendy crumbs my beloved
WENDY: “YEAH, THANK GOD.” JKFBDSKFBDSSD
i’m fucking crying oh my god
STENDYLE SUPREMACY LOOK AT THAT END CARD
ignore cartman being an idiot but STENDYLEEEE
awkward episode but AWSOME EPISODE
EPISODE 7:
KIDDOS PLAYING VIDEO GAMES WHOLESOME
CARTMAN PUT THAT TAMPON BACK WHERE YOU FOUND IT
boys are so cute looking at the gamesphere
who the fuck is towelie
ofc the boys play all weekend
AWW DO THEY ALL PLAY BASEBALL THAT’S CUTE
“u wanna get high?” bffr
misses baseball practice and now it’s monday and they gotta go to sckewl
not them stealing towelie but at the same time i don’t care
DO YOU KIDS EVEN KNOW HOW TO DRIVE ?@??@?#?@
what is this merch launch
STAN IS DRIVING AND KENNY IS ON THE PEDAL SABFHASBGBDSG
JFC
NOT TWEEK’S MOM
garrison pls
stan: we don’t care
they have PRIORITIES
CORE FOUR SKYDIVE
oh lord towelie pls
this is so odd ok
they don’t give a FUCK LET THEM PLAY THEIR OKAMA GAMESPHERE
NO KENNY NOT THE LAVA
CARTMAN SO REAL FOR THAT TOWELIE STATEMENT
EPISODE 8:
last ep for tn i think
WHAT THE FUCK ARE U ALL WEARING
butters !!
oh so butters gonna pass out
BUTTERS NO
no bc this is tweeking tweek out
WENDY ENDED CARTMAN SO TRUE
oh it’s the core four… but not.
SHARON MOM WHAT’S WRONG
oh OH
marsh family UNDER SIEGE
tweek baby boi it’s okay
EW WTF
towelie… wtf
BRO TOWELIE THAT WAS SO BAD PLEASE
no THE KIDS
kyle has claustrophobia ?? noted
stan. babe. please.
oh wow okay they rly going this route
i don’t rly wanna talk abt the subject in this ep bc it’s just. not appropriate
cartman pulling a road runner
what is with the bugs bunny refs
kyle: “i’m confused” me too babe
alr bedtime GOOD NITE
EPISODE 9:
HI GAMERS I’M BACC
happy 2 have a day off today to keep binging
lets goooo
AWWW THIS IS THE PICTURE DAY EPISODE JDKFJDSJBG
LOOK AT STAN AND HIS CUTE BLACK HAIR DJSBGKBKSDB HE IS SO BABIE
MY SON <3
stan infact, did not smile.
AYO BEBE GOT THAT DRAG MAKEUP ON SHE AN ALLY
butters OMG :’))))))) his little pink shirt
KENNY MY SON WTF
YOOOOO LOOK AT KYLE’S HAIR IT’S SO POOFY
HE’S SO CUTE
Cartman didn’t have to do all that pls he’s so extra
kenny my son ur a bit psycho for that but i digress
BUTTERS?? KENNY LITERALLY SHOWED HIS ASS
butters my baby boy you did nothing wrong i’m so sad
HOLY FUCK CARTMAN HE REALLY GETTING THAT KENNY PHOTO OUT THERE
STYLE PLAYDATE
cartman bro ur DERANGED
WHAT THE FUCK
ass cheek family I’M SCARRED
FUNNY FUSE
stan and kyle bringing ALL THE BOYS to see butt face parents (all my sons, icons really)
NO BUTTERS SUCH A BAD WAY TO BE GROUNDED
i’m mad he didn’t deserve this
butters pls don’t degrade urself i love u
cartman that’s so wild
kenny and kenny’s mom are scarred too
THE BOYS IN THE WINDOW
OFFICER BARBRADY??? MR. GARRISON? CHEF??? SHELIA???? y’all CRAZY CRAZY
it’s actually kinda nice for cartman to be chill
OH MY GOD THIS IS SO GROSS
JIMMY !!!
“what a terrific audience” jimmy is so funny
GOES TO BUTTER’S HOUSE PT 2
a paper bag???? his parents are so mean :’((((
accusing of butters putting on makeup ??? BUT WHAT IF HE LIKES IT???
butter’s dad transphobic he told me so
cartman having a heart <3
“our little man is growing up” style being in charge of cartman is so real of them
“things will start getting more sophisticated around here” stan sweetie i wanna believe u but i can’t. this is south park god dammit.
OKAY BC OF CHARACTER LIMIT I’MMA DO A PART 3
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kanene-yaaay · 2 months ago
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SQUEAKYYYYY MY BELOVED MY DEAR MY RAY OF SUNSHINEEEEEEEE!!!!! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 I know I already said that but I really, really, reaaaaaally love this fic so so soooo much like <3 <3 what a delight what a masterpiece!!!
I had to control myself so much to better appreciate it, I woke up like thrice during the night in excitment and I just keep smiling and giggling everytime I think about it. Truly, for me every single detail here is absolutely perfect <3 <3 You are always so soooooo on poin with your characterization that sometimes I could even HEAR the voice and tune of them when they scolded, teased and chatted. Really, I love every single part of this fic and if I could I would have you both on my arms rn so I could give you the BIGGEST and WARMEST of the hugs <3 <3 <3 I can't believe yet you wrote this for me like BRUH!!!! AN ENTIRE STORY??? FOR LIL OLD ME? You absolutely spoil me <3 <3 <3 <3 aaaaaaaaaa
Now! For the fic and all the spoilers:
THAT BEGINNING AND CONTEXT AAAAAAAAUGH!!!! PAIN AND SUFFERING AUGH AUGH I know I love the awesome, good old hurt/comfort but sometimes I forget that before the fluff comes the hurt so kjhgfdfghjklçlkjhg ouuuuuuuch!!!!!! However I do absolutely adore the new perspective this brings to Jiang Cheng's leardership, how much better is it that is so different yet his obligation to take it is just the same? How could his parents be still alive and that change everything and nothing at all about their story? Very very interesting in my opinion! The fact of having Wei Wuxian and Jiang Yanli (for now) on Lotus Pier must feel the biggest of the blessings!
Also!!!!!!! B R U H!!!!! HE AND LAN XICHEN EXCHANGING LETTERS (I know that is only mentioned later on the fic but shhhhh) AND LAN ZHAN AND WEI WUXIAN GETTING CLOSER??? TEHEHEHEHE THE BROTHERS IN LAW INDEED <3 <3 <3 PEACE AND LOVE ON PLANET EARTH GODBLESS
Wei Wuxian is also so real in throwing that rock. It's the Cain Effect you can't just see your sibling living in peace without IMMEDIATELY doing something to change that this is so so hgfdfghujikolokijuhyg perfect really, you blink and suddenly the rock that was in your hand just hit them in the middle of their face and now u gotta run
AAAAA THE MISCOMMUNICATION BORTHERS PAAAAAIN AND SUFFERIIIIIING I FORGOT THEY ARE STUPID WITH THEIR LOVE RIP
OOF How I do love the workaholic that is forced to have a break, realx and love trope- Squeakyyyy how come you always get everything so right?? <3
Jiang Cheng describing just how small he feels in front of his jiejie, just wanting to melt and snuggle on her embrace aaaaaa my heaaaaart, all I could imagine was him making himself the smallest as possible to fit nicely on her hug aaaaaa. Also kjhgfdfghujikolkiuhyg the way her radar is so good they just started getting their fight and then she immediately se materializou lá showing her sad face and eveything stopped IMMEDIATELY
Bruh not gonna lie I almost had a heart attack at wei wuxian wagged his fingers I fucking FROZE on the spot the fireworks on my stomach going crazy AND THEN nothing happened, thought I was going to breath AND THEN
THEM
THE TICKLES/LAS COSQUILLAS/COSQUINHAAAAAS
TIME FOR SILLY GIGGLY SILLY CUTE ADORABLE S I L L Y JIANG CHENG LET'S FUCKING GOOOO LIFE IS A GIFT IT'S AMAAAAZING
I freaking love the difference of Jiang Cheng being slowly send into absoluetly madness with tickles and his thought going all crazy and STILL he keeps being all cute and lovely with Jiang Yanli (<3 <3 <3 only thinks about threatning her ONCE) and going ABSOLUTELY FERAL KICKING SCREAMING THRISTY FOR REVENGE with Wei Wuxian it's so LKJHYGTFRGTYUIOKIUHYGTFDFGHJ The Yunmeng Sibs indeed <3
THE WALK OF SHAME MENTIOOON!!!!! FREAKING YEAH I WANT TO SEE ANY OF YOU ACTUALLY SAYING NO TO YANLI AT LEAST ONCE MWAHAHAHAHAHA YOU CAN'T GO BACK TO BEING TICKLED SILLY BOY
<3 <3 Yanli and Wuxian teaming together to be absolutely MENACES to society I adore it sooooo so soooo much <3 <3 <3 the idea of 22 raspberries one for each year is so kjhgfdfghjk I am so normal about it I swear
AND!!!!!!! JIANG CHENG HAVING SO MANY SWEET SPOTS GIGGLING LAUGHING SCREAMING SQWACKING SNICKERING WITH ALL THE TICKLES AAAA I AM DYING
Squeaky I have no idea whatare you TALKING ABOUT with the tickles on the tags, I was fucking dying reading them, Squeaky, I was on the FLOOR, melting trying to not acually GIGGLE out loud while reading it, my cheeks were HURTING from smiling so much and !!!!!!!!!!!! I can count the amount of time this happened on ONE HAND only
The mix of both Yanli and Wuxian teasing and praising him, chasing Jiang Cheng across the woods and resorting to DIRTY TRICKS to catch him (AND JIANG CHENG NOT EVEN USING AN OUNCE OF QI NO WAYYYYYY), they using his own reactions to lead him to lovely traps <3 <3 (the one of hhim trying to push the hands away and having his own caught and brought up to his head is CHEF KISS ABSOLUTELY CINEMA and Wei wuxian making him squirm so much to get access and absolutely destroy all the spots on his back I am in heaven)
AND!!!! THE BLACKMAIL!!! KIUHYTRFDFGHUJKOLKJHGVFC They simply sharing secret spots and memories from his childhood I would've DIED automatically on the spot but my bro would never he is so resistant he is so strong he would never be destroyed by giggles and tickles right teheheheee <3 <3 <3 <3 Also the describing of him getting so realxed and happy and fuzzy and content what if freaking died on the spot what then
The way you describe every reaction and tease and tickle and everything, really, haunst my mind is so incredible and magnifecent I feel llike I won the lottery jhgfghujkolkjhg I still can't believe you created such a masterpiece for me Squeaky, I can't even kiuhytfrgyujik
AND THE PERSONAL ATTACK !!!!!! TICKLISH CHEEKS AND TICKLISH CALVES??????? RIP HIM <3 <3 <3 MAY YOU KEEP REACEIVING ALL THE TICKLY TICKLING AND TICKLY TEASES WHEREVER YOU GO JIANG CHENG <3 <3
Also love the bickering admist the tickles especially as they try to embarrass each other withi their crushes kjhgfdefghjk Jiang Cheng getting all flared up when Wei Wuxian mentioned sex like, mah bro, she was the first one of you to DEFLOWER another man like please she got to bases you both haven't even heard of, mah bro Wei Wuxian didn't even get a kiss before de ir de comes e bebes.
The contrast also the seer contrast of all his worst spots beinga ttacked by both Yanli's soft and maddeningly light tickles and Wei Wuxian destroying attacks like HOW ARE YOU STILL ALIVE HOW CAN YOU LOOK AT THEM WITHOUT IMMEDIATELY DESCENDING INTO LAUGHTER HOW
(I gave from writing something coherent I am just rambling and screaming at this point lkjhgfdfgh rip)
Hope you also know everytime you mentioned them being cute and tickling each other during their childhood I immediately ascended and blacked out from cuteness. I hope. You Know.
I also know I already talked about the fishes but. Squeaky. THE. FISHES!!!!!! I used to be so obsessed w them when I was a kid like kjhgtfrdefrghj me and Jiang Cheng are the same bro hand in hands two tickle trash
Also I at leats had One Daydreaming Hour picturing Jiang Cheng getting payback on Wei Wuxian tickling him on That Secret Spot right in front of Lan Zhan which means that Wei Wuxian never gets to know peace anymore which means that Lotus Pier will be randomly filled with loud crackling alughter DAILY but which also means that one day Lan Xichen will Know and will approach Jiang Cheng all smiley and happy and soft and with a Kind of Light in his eyes that will be explained very soon, A-Cheng, please join me to a discussion over tea on my quarters ^^
AND, TO END WITH A GOLDEN KEY, WEI WUXIAN CALLING HIM HIS DIDI AND YANLI HIS JIEJIE (I also almost died when Yanli said "Who's you Shijie") and Jaing Cheng showing his love thro killing tickles and shouting HI HI HIIIII IT'S HIMMMM IT'S THE SOUR GRAPE WE ALL LOVEEE <3
Also, the detail of them (after faling on water) trying to get on the pier again but being tickled on their unprotected armpits everytime lkjhgfrdefghyj it's just such a small but equally playful and chaotic detail <3 I really do adore the way you write your stories, everything make it so fun, so delightful to read, you can describe every scenario and every feeling so perfectly and I am truly very thankfull and incredibly honoured you wrote this for me. Seriously, you did everything so perfect here, I will cherish this gift every single day of my life
Peas In a (Lotus) Pod
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Fandom: Mo Dao Zu Shi / Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation
Characters: Lee!Jiang Wanyin, Ler!Jiang Yanli, Ler!Wei Wuxian
Warnings: Angst, mentions of death, mentions of suicidal ideation
Word count: 12.000 words
Summary: The children of Yunmeng Jiang persevered. Even in the face of adversity, joy could be found in the simplest of things. (It was going to be found whether it liked it or not. Jiang Wanyin's siblings would make sure of it. They couldn't let their brother be so upset on his birthday, could they?)
A/N: UMM HELLO??? WHY IS THERE NOT A PARTY GOING ON IN HERE?? UNACCEPTABLE. EVERYONE WAKE TF UP BECAUSE TODAY IS @kanene-yaaay 's BIRTHDAAYYY!!!! To celebrate this special day and the incredible, wonderful person and friend that you are, Kanene, have a little gift made with lots of love! May you have a fantastic birthday, mana, because you deserve nothing but the best <3 <3
Jiang Wanyin knocked on his father's door once.
Twice.
Thrice.
He made sure to call out for the man, asking him to please come out, so he'd know it was his son personally asking for him, and not some random disciple.
There was no response. No greeting, no footsteps from the other side of the door, not even the rustling sound of his father moving about in bed.
Time and time again, he'd gotten nothing. Hell, his only confirmation that his father was even alive in there were the empty dishes left on his doorstep after servants brought him meals.
Jiang Wanyin thought today would be different. He should have known better. But still, he hoped. And he felt ridiculous for it. He was a Sect Leader. (He had to be.) He fought in a war, had to take on the responsibility of rebuilding his ancestral home almost from scratch and he was an adult. Yet here he was, paralyzed in front of his father's door because he didn't bother to acknowledge him on his birthday, like some clingy child.
He couldn't afford to act like a child anymore. So why, why, did he feel frozen on the spot? Why did he feel transported back to that day, tossed into a boat and held down by Zidian, forced to watch as his home burned and his mother walked into an ambush?
Wanyin forced himself to turn on his feet. He could not take it personally. He could be mature about it. So what if his father didn't want to see him? The man didn't even ditch his seclusion for an incense stick's time to congratulate his only daughter, his eldest child, on setting an official date for her wedding— Which Wanyin knew he was aware of, because A-Jie wrote him an actual letter just to make sure he knew, instead of trying to talk to him through the door and hoping he was awake to hear it— So why would he grace his son with his presence?
It's been that way for nearly a year.
He understood, he did, that his father was dealing with far too much. He'd been captured by the Wen along with his mother that night they invaded Lotus Pier, then held captive in Nightless City up until the end of the Sunshot Campaign, being subjected to gods know what until he was rescued. ‘Far too much’ was an understatement. He couldn't imagine the kind of mental scars that would leave on someone.
But was it that selfish of him to wish he could have his father back? Scratch that, have his parents back.
Jiang Wanyin wasn't stupid. He knew his parents' treatment of him throughout the years was less than ideal. But they were still his parents, and he'd do anything to have them by his side. Especially now that he was suddenly pushed into the role of Sect Leader due to his father's seclusion. He wasn't a child, sure, but he still felt so terrifyingly young. Unprepared. At least if he had his parents by his side, maybe he wouldn’t be haunted by the feeling he had no clue what he was doing. He'd have some guidance, regardless of how inadequate (second-best insufficient not good enough never good enough) their counseling always made him feel.
He found himself missing even his mother's sharp words. She still sent letters, although visits were rare, but it wasn't the same. Even with his father holed up in his quarters, she refused to set foot in Lotus Pier if she could help it. Wanyin didn't know what was it that hit the final nail in the coffin to start off the divorce that's been looming over his family for years, (How would he? It's not like they told him anything) but those two were dead set on staying apart.
Which left him juggling the Jiang Sect by himself. Because what else was he supposed to do? Leave A-Jie and Wei Wuxian to shoulder his responsibilities while he ran off to Meishan Yu to whine to his mother?
Yeah, no.
He was handling it well enough on his own, given the circumstances. Too many of their friends shidis disciples were lost, and Lotus Pier literally went up in flames. Obviously everything felt like a huge fucking mess. It was, objectively, a huge fucking mess. Anyone would have trouble piecing together the broken fragments of post-war Yunmeng Jiang into something functional and respectable. The fact everything still felt scattered to the winds had nothing to do with his leadership.
Right?
Zidian crackled around his finger.
He didn’t understand why. He was fine, he was calm, he was taking it all in stride, as expected from someone of his station. He didn’t understand why some disciples scurried to get out of his way when he walked past either. What, was there something on his face?
Weird people. Who runs away from their Sect Leader like a frightened animal without at least a greeting?
Heavy footsteps came to a slow halt as he neared the main area of Lotus Pier, away from the sheltered part of the forest where his father’s seclusion home could be found. Actually, he’d gotten here quicker than usual. His body felt a bit more tense and his legs a little more sore than it did earlier this morning, too. Did he storm all the way here or something?
He hadn’t noticed.
Only when something small thrown with high speed collided with his forehead did he realize in the back of his mind that his face had been curled into a scowl. He scowled even further.
"Wei Wuxian!" He snarled up at trees towering above him, eyes darting between the leaves in search of the one person who'd have the gall to throw a lotus seed at him. Sure enough, Wanyin found him. Perched high up in a branch, wine bottle in hand and a stupid grin on his face like he didn’t have a care in the world. He grit his teeth. 'What are you- Get down! We have work to do and you're just lounging up there like a damn bird?!"
Wei Wuxian's playful smile slid right off, whatever dumb thing he was about to say dying on his lips. Jiang Wanyin regretted it almost instantly.
Maybe he wasn't so calm after all.
"Aiya- Jiang Cheng, the world won't explode if we take it easy for a day." Wei Wuxian forced casualness and joviality into his voice. Wanyin wasn't fooled. Ever since he came back from his three-month disappearance during the Sunshot Campaign, there was something off about him. Jiang Wanyin barely recognized him, at times. Even Lan Wangji was having more difficulty genuinely lifting his spirits when he stopped by, and that was saying something. Wei Wuxian must think Wanyin a fool as well as blind, to keep putting on that dumb facade where he pretended everything was fine, as if his face didn't turn hauntingly somber whenever Wei Wuxian thought no one else was looking. "Did you forget what day it is?"
Jiang Wanyin nearly missed his words, but the playfully mocking tone drew in his focus. Wanyin knew it was fake. He hated it.
Wanyin should have been there to protect him. Whatever happened during those three months, Wanyin should have prevented it. What was the use in delivering himself to the Wens on a silver platter to keep Wei Wuxian safe, if Jiang Wanyin wasn't there to keep him from becoming a shell of himself?
He should have recovered faster. They should have been side by side-
Bitterness built up in his chest, crawling up his throat, wrapping around his tongue and prying open his mouth like a snake.
"The world won't stop just because it's my birthday either! It's just a day like any other." He spat, the words sitting heavily in the air. He ignored the protests in the back of his mind and he especially ignored how the words stung as they forced their way out. That was the truth. How he felt about it didn't matter. "We don't have time to waste. The faster we're done with the renovations, the better."
Wei Wuxian had the gall to scoff at him as if he was the one who'd gone nuts. "What crap are you spewing? You never want to work on your birthday!" His brother jumped off the tree and bumped their shoulders together— grinning in that way that seemed almost right but not quite— as he wrapped an arm around his shoulder and tapped the wine bottle against Wanyin's chest. "Shijie's been looking for you for hours so we can go to the vendors like we used to. Stop looking like you swallowed a lemon, eh?"
"It's different this year!" The Sect Leader snapped. He didn't outright shove Wei Wuxian away, but he did slip out of his grasp. So much to be done, and his brother was out and about lounging and drinking and- "Our sect is in ruin, this place is a mess and it's not miraculously getting better the moment we turn our backs because it's not like we can expect A-Die to swoop in and fix everything like when we were kids anytime soon!"
His brother pursed his lips, understanding dawning on his eyes when he processed which direction Jiang Wanyin came from. "Did you-"
"Yes," Wanyin interrupted through gritted teeth. He surprised even himself with the venom in that simple word. "Not even you or A-Jie could get him out of that room, I don't know why I tried! Obviously he wouldn't bother with me!"
Wei Wuxian's expression was surprisingly patient given how many times they've revisited that argument. Or maybe patient wasn't the right word. Exhausted and with no will left to argue, perhaps, if the dark circles underneath his eyes that suddenly seemed far more noticeable were any indication. "Jiang Cheng, don't speak nonsense. You're his son and-"
"He seems to forget that a lot, doesn't he!"
Two brothers could only stare at each other after the outburst. Wei Wuxian wore a forlorn look that seemed so out of place on his face. Jiang Wanyin's throat felt unbearably tight, his chest rising and falling in a rapid rhythm. He wanted to yell. He wanted to punch something. He might have wanted to cry, a little. He did nothing, his whole body so tense it felt completely rigid.
The sound of leaves crushed over light, familiar footsteps drained the fight out of him. He sagged.
"A-Cheng..." Wanyin turned to the sound of his sister's voice, his own face mirroring hers as he caught sight of her crestfallen expression. Now he's upset not just himself but both his siblings. Great. Way to go, Jiang Wanyin.
"A-Jie," he was thankful his voice only trembled the slightest bit. He couldn’t remember the last time he felt that small in front of her. Part of him wanted to lean into it, to let the anguish roll off of him in waves and let himself be comforted by his older sister the way he'd never been comforted by his parents. But he couldn't do that to her, not when she already looked so heartbroken. He pushed down the urge. "I'm sorry, I can't- I shouldn't leave right now. There's too much to do and I already wasted too much time-" He put a stop to that line of thinking, lest bitterness creep into his tone again. "If you want something from the vendors, I can ask some disciples to take you. Or you can go with Wei Wuxian."
Wei Wuxian sent him an indecipherable look. Jiang Wanyin ignored it. He'd still prefer Wei Wuxian here lending him a helping hand, but if A-Jie wanted some time off from the chaos that was current Lotus Pier, he'd feel more at ease if she had their brother with her.
"Didi, you know that's not why we wanted to go. If the three of us aren't going, then we're not going either." Jiang Yanli took her youngest brother gently by the hand as she's done countless times since he was a toddler, guiding him to sit beside her by the tree trunk. She shot Wei Wuxian a pleading expression. Please stay.
The Head Disciple (or was he already the Second in Command now?) was sat beside Jiang Wanyin in an instant.
There was a furrow between the woman's eyebrows as she faced her brother.. "You went to see A-Die?"
Jiang Yanli's semblance grew uncharacteristically melancholic with each passing moment she awaited his answer. If Jiang Wanyin wasn't already feeling like utter crap, he'd slap himself for putting such an expression on his sister's face.
"Seeing him is kind of a stretch." He genuinely wasn't sure what he was even expecting from his attempt. Maybe a note slid underneath the door if his father didn't feel like talking? Maybe for the man to whisper something to himself from his bed at least? The bright golden core spinning in Wanyin's dantian made his senses far stronger than before, yet he heard no sign his father wished to talk to him or that he even knew what day it was. Not even a sharp intake of breath. "It was stupid. I shouldn't have."
He certainly couldn't have actually expected his father would come out of seclusion, even if just for a moment, to spend some time with him just for the sake of it. No, that didn't sound like his father at all.
The young Sect Leader didn't like the feeling of being proven right, for once.
He vaguely heard Wei Wuxian making some loud noise of protest, but ultimately letting their sister take the reins of the conversation.
"A-Cheng. Don't say that." Her tone was chiding and firm, every bit the eldest child of a prestigious sect. Every bit the daughter of the famous (infamous, too) Violet Spider. "This day is important to you, it's always been. There's nothing stupid in wanting to spend it with people also important to you."
Now more than ever, under her gaze, Jiang Wanyin felt like a child again. But he found that in her presence, he didn't quite mind. She's said it herself once that they would always be her baby brothers. If some parts of her would always see him as a kid, he could afford to engage a little every now and then when the mantle of Sandu Shengshou the Sect Leader weighed too heavily on his shoulders.
"You can't take it so personally. Jiang-shushu, he's-" Wei Wuxian wore a strange look of uncertainty that Jiang Wanyin assumed to be the result of the battle between the admiration he held for his father and the bitterness that festered inside each of them. "He's not in his right mind."
"Obviously!" Jiang Wanyin glowered. "He'd have to be out of his mind not to show his face to A-Jie when she tried!" They both generally brushed aside how he'd been so ready to take it completely personally when it was himself that his father turned down. Jiang Yanli didn't manage to disguise her exasperation when Wanyin turned to her, his face bordering in apologetic. "If he did open that damned door today but not when you went to talk about your engagement, I'd start questioning my filiality."
Now he was almost thankful his father gave him no response. He couldn't begin to imagine how A-Jie would feel. Birthdays rolled around every year, so what if he cared too much about his? It's not every year you announce you're getting married.
Jiang Yanli gave a fond shake of her head and spoke with far more certainly than she felt. "We just have to be patient. Give him time, and he'll come around." With a soothing smile she pushed aside her own doubts, her own fears. Her brother needed reassurance. And that, at least, was familiar. She clung to it. "It won't be like it used to, but It'll be... better than this."
Silence blanketed them as they willed themselves to believe. Or at least pretend like they did, for each other's sake.
Jiang Wanyin wasn't sure he could pretend, not even to himself. He knew, better than the two of them would ever know, what it felt like for someone raised as an heir to a Sect to be completely weakened.
Powerless.
Coreless.
Even so, he wasn't stuck in that miserable state for nearly as long as his father. At least he was given some hope shortly after Wen Zhuliu became a source of his nightmares.
Baoshan Sanren. The name inspired in him gratitude and anger in equal measure.
What use was there in cultivating to immortality, in having powers beyond mortal comprehension, if you'd hide yourself away in a mountain when your skills were needed by so many? What was the point in mastering how to practically give life back to a cultivator, restore their future, if you would do it for the son of a past disciple but not leaders of a great sect? Or anyone else that had no personal ties to you, for that matter? (Sometimes he wanted to drag his parents up that mountain himself, despite Wei Wuxian's insistence that it would be for nothing.)
If he hadn't lied about his name back there, what would have become of him?
Alive, he would be, he presumed. Though he believed his parents dead at the time, he still had his siblings. There were times he... considered. But if it came down to it, if he had the opportunity to try while under Wen-guniang's supervision, he wasn't sure he could put what remained of his family through that anguish.
He supposed that, too, was the case for his mother. Her pride was damaged beyond repair with the loss of her cultivation, but Meishan Yu didn't let go of its children. His mother might have lost much, but she still had her sisters to support her. That wasn't the same for his father, however.
'Attempt the impossible' was their sect's motto. Jiang Wanyin always believed his father was stronger than him. He hoped with all his might that was the truth. Because he couldn't imagine himself finding the strength to attempt to bounce back from this.
The three of them sat in silence, merely being there for one another, A-Jie holding onto his hand and Wei Wuxian almost leaning onto him.
Minutes later, oblivious to his solemn thoughts, Wei Wuxian decided he had enough of the tension.
"And he'll be heartbroken to hear you spent your birthday sulking and running around Lotus Pier like a workaholi-"
"I am not sulking!" Jiang Wanyin shoved his shoulder.
A finger was wagged teasingly at him as his brother laughed. "That's exactly what a sulking person would say!" That familiar playful grin adorned his face again. Relief lightened the burden on his heart at the sincerity of it, even if it was at his expense.
Exhaling sharply, Wanyin felt a pull at the threads of his resistance. He still couldn't afford to spend much time away from his duties. But he supposed he could spare a bit, if only to make his siblings quit looking at him like he's about to break into a fever from overworking. "I still don't want to stay away for too long." He conceded. "Just the trip to the vendors and back would take half a shichen."
"Aiyo, fine, we can just hang around here then." Wei Wuxian jabbed a finger on his side. "But no working! For at least a shichen! You were up so late last night reading trade agreements it's a miracle you don't look like a walking corpse!"
Bless the older man's chatter for making his gasp go unnoticed.
Yet neither of them missed the way he stiffened.
Wanyin made the grave error of making eye contact with his brother and thus saw the exact moment when an idea formed in his head. Which usually did not bode well for him.
Hands latched onto his sides and the squawk that left him was in no way dignified. "You-!" Another embarrassing noise and he sent his brother the fiercest glare he could muster as he once again shoved him away. "Stop being childish!"
His troublemaker brother was undeterred. If anything, he was encouraged. "Who's being childish?" The stubborn hands returned with a vengeance, playful fingers digging into his clothes until he doubled over. "If tickling was just for kids, we'd have grown out of it!"
Jiang Yanli gigged at their antics beside him. Wanyin sent her a half pleading look, which only resulted in her bringing up a hand to hide an amused smile, contrasting to the mischievous delight washed over Wei Wuxian's face like he just sneaked into the Cloud Recesses a jar of Emperor's Smile for each rule etched into the Wall of Discipline.
The beginning of a protest was interrupted by a shriek as his sides were tased. Wei Wuxian swiftly avoided a hit by Jiang Wanyin's head as the latter trashed on the spot. "Now you're starting to look like a birthday man! You can't be sad on your birthday, that's like, the rule!" The menace flashed his sister a toothy grin. "Look, look, Shijie, doesn't he look a lot happier now?"
Jiang Yanli clapped enthusiastically, the perfect picture of joy and innocence. "The happiest!"
"A-Jihihihie!" Jiang Wanyin didn't whine at the betrayal, because he does not whine, but he did guffaw and jump as nimble fingers poked too close to his ribs before returning to his sides. "Dohohon't ehehencourahahage him!"
The woman leaned in closer, her lips curled into a very particular smile Wanyin hasn't seen in a long time. "But it's been so long since we got to have fun like this!" He felt the ghost of a touch against his ribcage before the fingers even made contact, his legs kicking uselessly in front of him. "And you've been so stressed lately, you should get to let loose a little. I think this could be good for you, didi."
His face burned. He wondered just when was it that his treacherous body decided to give up and not ask for his input, practically letting the two do whatever. Get up! Fight back! At least make a run for it! Don't just sit there like a dog squirming without thought or directio- "AHAHAHAHASSHOHOHOLE!"
Wei Wuxian gleefully ignored the outburst and kept up the onslaught of pinches up and down one side of his brother's ribcage, while giving Jiang Yanli free reign over the other. "And! We still gotta give you your birthday gifts!" His grin was downright diabolical as the younger man's features conveyed his confusion and suspicion as best as they could. "I hid the actual gifts in your room, but we can whip something else up right now! Cuz A-Cheng deserves the best gifts!"
"I'll pahahahass!" Wanyin scooted towards Yanli, the current lesser of two evils. He would have liked to say he immediately regretted calling his sister such a vile thing even in his thoughts, but rationality was pushed aside as she took his approach as permission to simultaneously skitter up his ribs and reach around him from behind to squeeze his other side, making him flail from left to right like a fish.
"You're turning what, twenty two?" Wei Wuxian tapped a finger against his own cheek in mock pondering like he didn't know the answer by heart, grin unwavering as he leaned over until his face was almost pressed against his ribs. "I say we give you twenty two of these gifts then! One for each year!"
"Whahahahat are yohohohou- NOHOHOHO!" He screeched, pushing Wei Wuxian's head. The explosion of sensation puppeteered his body farther from the attack– finally it came to its senses!– until he backed against the tree. Mercifully, Wei Wuxian allowed himself to be pushed away and didn't go for another torturous raspberry right after the previous that still had his skin tingling underneath his robes.
A-Jie beamed, following after him with a grace which contradicted the rare mischievousness shining in her eyes that did not mellow down over the years as he thought. In a fit of compassion, or maybe delusion, he sent a prayer up for the Peacock and whatever lucky yet poor soul Yanli would befriend when they unleashed her into Koi Tower.
Jiang Wanyin surrendered himself to the inevitable. He wasn't going to fight against his sister and fall victim to those obviously fake but still powerful, saddened 'My didi doesn't want my affection..?' puppy eyes.
"Oh my!" Yanli chirped, burying her face on his exposed neck and going in for the kill with no hesitation. The loud cackles ripped from his throat would have nearly muffled her next words, were the feigned innocence in her voice not alarming enough to grab his attention. "Twenty two from each of us? A-Cheng, I think you'll break the records of how many birthday gifts any young master's ever gotten."
Mutiny. That's what this was.
Wanyin has grown so wary of Wei Wuxian's tricks since he was mostly the main instigator, that he forgot where the man learned it all from.
"JIHIHIEHEHEJIE! Pleheheahase!"
The aforementioned bastard snickered, more than happy to play along with the deliberate misinterpretation of his words. "Are you telling us Sandu Shengshou can't take a few raspberries?" With eyes theatrically blown wide he drilled into Wanyin's hipbones. "Oh no no no, Jiang Cheng, we can't have that! What if some yao figures out it can take you down like this? You gotta be prepared!"
The impish grin stretched on his lips did nothing to convince Jiang Wanyin of the validity of his argument. Which didn't bother Wei Wuxian in the slightest if the raspberry unceremoniously blown on the other side of his neck meant anything. "This shixiong will help you build up tolerance! Though we should probably start off small, better if we stick to just twenty two in general." Fingertips crawled over his stomach as Wei Wuxian sent Jiang Yanli a playfully apologetic glance. "Sorry, Shijie! Save the other twenty two for next year, then throw in an extra one for inflation!"
Wanyin's exclamation of both relief and affront went unnoticed amidst the trio's laughter. Mostly his, as much as it embarrassed him to admit. "A-Xian is Head Disciple. If he thinks it's best-" Yanli stopped dead in her tracks. She blinked, staring as Jiang Wanyin instinctively propelled himself forward as her hand ghosted over a spot on his back.
Jiang Wanyin stood frozen on his feet and dared to look behind him, expecting to be met with A-Jie's big sad eyes and carry out The Walk Of Shame back to his siblings.
What he saw was somehow worse.
Jiang Yanli stood up only a few footsteps away, lips ever so slowly curling into a wide grin as they held eye contact. Behind her, leaning against the tree but ready to break into a sprint at any moment, Wei Wuxian mirrored their sisters grin with one of his own that seemed to spell out 'You are so screwed.'
It unlocked things he'd unconsciously repressed for too long.
Memories of being much, much smaller than he was now, tucked underneath his sister's arm and giggling his heart out. The joy of dashing away with stubby little legs, smiling so widely it almost hurt. Then the comfort and warmth of lying on her lap next to his brother after they'd been thoroughly tired out, squeals escaping them as a hand running soothingly across their backs accidentally strayed too close to a sensitive spot.
It all came rushing back to him quicker than he could process and something he'd long forgotten how to name bubbled in his chest.
Jiang Wanyin, despite his faults, was a smart, well-trained man. A force of nature fated to prevail at all costs. The young Sect Leader knew what he had to do.
Gathering all his courage, he ran.
Twin giggles echoed behind him, leaves and twigs crushed beneath his boots in a rapid pace. They might have called for him, but it was all drowned in the waves of giddiness and playfulness he hasn't felt since youth, alongside his awareness of his surroundings. He let his body and instincts guide him, the layout of Yunmeng Jiang's Lotus Pier familiar enough he could navigate it in his sleep.
He didn't know where he was running to, all he knew was the strength of the light-hearted urge to put distance between himself and his siblings who were determined to make a fun, delightful mess out of him.
Jiang Wanyin let his legs carry him to the heart of Lotus Pier, only the sound of wood under his feet alerting him that he's left the forest as adrenaline clouded his perception.
He could make out a set of light running footsteps tailing his every movement (One? Why was there only one?), slowly and steadily growing closer. Jiang Wanyin pointedly ignored the mocking voice in his head that said if he truly wanted to escape his nearly coreless sister, he would have already circled qi through his body to make himself faster by now.
Wanyin wouldn't do it because he wasn't a dirty cheater. No other reason. (The voice, which sounded suspiciously like a mix of Wei Wuxian and Zewu-jun, responded with a disingenuous 'Yes, of course.')
A startled feminine yelp pushed him out of his thoughts and he acted on instinct, rushing back and reaching his sister just in time to keep her from plummeting to the floor. Only for him to end up on the floor as Jiang Yanli embraced him and guided him down like a straw doll.
He barely had time to blink before feeling wood planks against his back, his nose being playfully tapped as a cheerful grin and shining eyes were flashed at him from above. "Have more faith in your jiejie, A-Cheng. I'm not that clumsy."
The man couldn't even wrap his head around the betrayal before a pair of lips nestled in the center of his stomach had him curling up with a shrill shriek. "NOHOHOT THEHEHEHERE, A-JIHIHIHIE!"
"Not there?" Jiang Yanli innocently tilted her head and he braced for impact, shutting his eyes to cope with the terribly ticklish leftover sensation that still lingered on that spot as she aimed for his side. "Okay!"
Heat flushed to his cheeks at the embarrassingly bubbly giggles that flowed out of him like a stream from the devastating combination of a raspberry to his side and her nose nuzzling against it like a rabbit. Even as he writhed and tried not pushing her away, the gesture transported him back to a time he barely remembered, calling forth what he could only describe as nostalgia and child-like happiness. Until an unforgiving mouth blew on his belly button again.
"GAHAHAHAHAHAH WHY?!" Self-preservation took over and he shoved at the offending face with all the gentleness Jiang Wanyin could afford, the incessant jingling of his clarity bell audible over his booming laughter from how much he fidgeted. (He couldn't go as far as to, what, staying still and taking it? No one could possibly have that much of a thick face.)
He grew redder as he not only heard but felt his brother snickering into his stomach. His eyes opened to see Wei Wuxian's lopsided grin. "What? You asked Shijie, not me!" His tone was conversational like he was merely commenting on the weather rather than reducing his Sect Leader to hysteria. "Unless I'm your A-Jie now. I'd make a pretty woman!"
When he responded with a squawk plus a kick of his leg it was certainly due to Wei Wuxian's words, and not due to the calloused fingers now kneading the back of his thigh. "A frohohohog wohohohould mahahahake a prehehettihihier wohohohoman than yohohohou!"
Jiang Yanli let her mouth fall open in false shock, clutching a hand to her chest while the other traced senseless shapes on his side. "Didi, don't talk like that to someone teaching you such an important lesson. This could be a matter of life or death, you know."
'What lesson?! How to keep making all these brainless noises?! A baby could do that!' His mind cried out as manicured nails teased the area where his side met his waist, where he was ridiculously sensitive, then spidered upwards to briefly brush against his lower ribs- where he was, also, ridiculously sensitive. Jiang Wanyin didn't know who'd taught his sister to be so ruthless, but he had some choice words to say to them.
Wei Wuxian vigorously shook his head, fingers drumming all over the underside of Wanyin's thigh like one would with a dizi. "No, no, see, this is how you know he's learning! He'd insult everything he laid his eyes on back when we were learning sword forms." Never once pausing his attack, he heightened the pitch of his voice to imitate a younger Jiang Wanyin. "I would have gotten it right if this dumb rock wasn't in the way! I'll kill these damn birds if they don't stop swooping in and distracting me! Whose stupid idea was it to fight with a ponytail if your opponent can just grab it?!" His head was thrown back as he laughed (Genuine. Genuine. Wanyin's spirit cheered), beaming with fondness and what was unmistakably pride. "It was dumb this, idiot that, but he'd always be one of the first to get whatever we were doing right."
"A-Cheng was always a wonderful student." Jiang Yanli agreed easily, voice warmer than the warmth of her fingers scraping gently over his side, following his every squirm. "I have it on good authority that some Jin disciples really looked up to you at the Cloud Recesses lectures. If things were less tense back then, you'd have your own ducklings trailing after you."
Bafflement broke through Wanyin's joyful expression. Wei Wuxian snorted at the combination of puzzled eyes, a wide smile and a red face.
"Maybe it's not just the Peacock that has good taste. I bet you work harder in a day than they have their whole lives!" The older boy sat over his brother's knees, keeping him from kicking out too much as Wei Wuxian's relentless squeezes alternated between one thigh and the other. "Pretty sure I've never met anyone who works harder than you, actually. Gusu Lan is struggling almost as hard as our sect even with the Jin helping them rebuild, while the only thing keeping Yunmeng Jiang afloat is your leadership."
The young Sect Leader felt his throat tighten and his eyes sting, which he would have ruled off as tears of laughter were the timing not suspicious. Aiyo, what's up with this? You hear a few nice words and you start crying? You must be really at rock bottom if you're down to this level!
"I don't think I've ever seen you fail at something you set your mind to." Yanli's whole demeanor softened, the playful tilt of her voice fading into something much more earnest. The nimble touches on his side slowed to a caress that could almost be called comforting if it didn't have him twitching in anticipation of something more intense. "A-Die...A-Niang...even A-Xian. For all you knew, you lost them, and you still had the willpower to help lead a war and win." A hint of sadness lingered on her smile as she offered his side a slight squeeze. If the gesture was meant to be soothing, it missed the mark entirely. Wanyin tried not to squirm away from it either way. "That takes far more strength than you realize."
The soft touches overwhelmed his mind and demanded his undivided attention, barring him from truly processing what was said to him. But the words' effects were felt by him all the same, in the way his body sagged as the fight and anguish vanished out of him. It was strange– but not unwelcome, he supposed– to feel like he did after he'd had a long cry in his sister's arms as a child, but from laughing himself hoarse. He guessed it was nice, maybe.
Wei Wuxian huffed in open affection. That alone could have made Jiang Wanyin turn his head in poorly disguised flusteredness, though the jolting sensation of curious fingers rubbing lightning quick circles into his hipbones played a massive part in it. "He's got plenty of strength to spare." Unforgiving drilling was unleashed upon the sensitive areas, as if Wanyin's strength was his brother's personal invitation to torment him as he pleased. As Wanyin felt the diligent attack falter, he risked a glance up at his brother. The soft, tender smile directed at him wasn't something he realized his brother's face was capable of doing. It tugged at his emotions more than he'd have liked it to. "I never thanked you for getting back to the Xuanwu's cave so quickly, did I?"
He didn't. And Jiang Wanyin wasn't about to let him start now. (Wanyin would have done it again, for his brother. Would do more. Did do more.)
Through chortles and gulps of much needed air, he managed to grit out what first came to his head. "As if yohohou wohohouldn't shuhuhut yohohoursehehelf off in anohohother cahahave if Lan Wahahahangji was in IHIHIHIHIT-!"
Wei Wuxian's rose victorious from his brother's waist where he planted a raspberry without as much as a warning, Yanli snickering as his laughter jumped up an octave. "You're one to talk! Don't think I don't know about your new penpal Zewu-jun!" Wei Wuxian had the audacity to wait until their gazes met to waggle his eyebrows. "What, are joining their rebuilding team and helping raise Gusu Lan back into glory or are you raising other things?"
Wanyin's eyes bulged, pink hues washing over his cheeks. "Wei Wuxian!"
His attempt at swatting his vulgar brother in indignation were foiled by Jiang Yanli taking the window of opportunity where he'd raised his arm and ducking in to aim a raspberry in his underarm of all places. "You really think so?" She conversed gleefully over his backstabbed, disbelieving sputters and exclamations, reaching down to trace as much of his kneecaps as she could reach with the other man sitting over them. "I'd love for someone to look after my didi when I'm away at Koi Tower."
He was not- HE WAS NOT DEFLOWERING SECT LEADER LAN! Nor the other way around! And neither would happen anytime soon! So what if Wanyin enjoyed his company more than he did most people's and wanted some way to keep in touch frequently, given Lan Xichen didn't have time to swing by Lotus Pier so often like a certain other Lan he knew? Can't a man have a close male friend in his life without being labeled a cut-sleeve? Sect Leader Nie and that Jin Guangyao seemed close and Wanyin wouldn't assume they'd trail after each other with lovestruck eyes!
No, he knew other people who did that.
"Me?" He yelled out amidst a wave of sniggering, courtesy of his sister venturing too close to the underside of his knees, trying to sneak between them and the floor. "It's Wehehei Wuhuhuxihian you shohohould wohohorry abohohout! Lettihihing that stohohone wall Lahahan Wahahangji wahahalk all ohohohover him! He'd juhuhump off a clihihihiff if Lan Wahahahangji dihihid!"
A reprieve from Wei Wuxian absentmindedly trailing up and down his hips and thighs was granted to him as the man scoffed in dramatic outrage at the insult to his 'Lan Zhan'. (Gross, even in his thoughts Wanyin heard the name in his brother's weird flirtatious voice.) Silver eyes narrowed in warning. Wanyin tensed immediately the second his brother's head took a dive for his stomach and-
"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-!" His back arched and his entire frame convulsed, the ridiculous silliness of the situation dragging him further into that fuzzy, giddy state of mind with each obnoxious 'PFFFBBBT' his attacker let out, rubbing his face into the expanse of his stomach for good measure to drive him further into madness.
A millisecond of nothingness. He thanked the heavens. It was over, right?
Then another blow of quirked up lips against clothed skin. Wanyin jostled with enough force to nearly throw his brother off him. One more cruel, taunting pause. And then another, before that demon was forced to retreat as Wanyin's hands flew down pry him off.
Which, he realized with danwing horror the moment Wei Wuxian got a hold of his wrists and pinned them over his head, was not the smartest decision to make. (That smug bastard had better count himself lucky A-Jie was on his side, or he'd have used spiritual energy to break free and turn the tables ages ago. Just because it was fun didn't mean Wanyin had to be a pushover about it.)
Panting and through eyes almost crinkled shut with the width of his smile, Jiang Wanyin called forth the will to glare at Wei Wuxian, who wiped off his own mouth with his free hand. "Eugh-!" The black-robed man stuck out his tongue in mock disgust. "Tastes like vinegar!"
"A-Cheng." Jiang Yanli cut in warmly, successfully worming her fingers under his knees and wriggling like there was no tomorrow, the onslaught on his nerves sweeping an 'I'll show you vinegar!' from the tip of his tongue. "Do you remember, when you were very little and you saw me petting a dog's stomach, you'd lay down next to it and ask for the same?"
Above him, his brother choked with delighted laughter. Wanyin was positive his face was on fire. It must have been. There can't be any other explanation for the way everything from his neck to the tips of his ears burned. "JihihIHIHIE!" The youngest's squeals pierced through the air, blunt nails fluttering at his underarm, pressing down at the sensitive center with deadly precision. "THAHAHAHAT WAS YEHEHEARS AHAHAGO!"
As though to connect him with his younger and shameless self, Jiang Yanli switched her focus to his stomach, spidering gently yet relentlessly along the middle. He thought she'd forgotten that- Why did she still remember that? He barely remembered that! Why did she have to remind him of that? Where had his kind, merciful sister gone? Spare your didi's pride!
Fragments of several occasions of darting through the legs of people much taller than him, of spotting his jiejie and launching himself to the ground next to her, knowing she'd cradle his head before it reached the floor. Of gleefully clinging to her sleeves, shrill giggles wracking his tiny body, playful touches and wet snouts encasing him in delight. Joy and affection burning brightly within him, brighter than any golden core he could grow to cultivate. Simple happiness.
He hid his flaring face on his shoulder just in time to muffle a startled shriek as his sister landed two 'gifts' on the tender skin between the bones of his ribs.
Jiang Yanli peered down at her youngest brother, lost in cherished memories of easier times, lips curved upwards in such a way that was so inconceivably fond Wanyin couldn't bear to even pretend to be angry at her. Not even when she took to prodding lightly at his bellybutton, following after it no matter where he flailed. "And you'd dip your feet in the water and let the fish nibble your toes, giggling so much you'd almost fall off the dock."
Jiang Wanyin's ability to think straight had long since bid him farewell. He wasn't going to waste any mental energy wondering how in the world she knew that when he always made sure there was no one else nearby back then.
"Jiang Cheng!" Wei Wuxian grinned like he'd never been happier than in this very moment. Scratch the grin, the man practically had stars in his eyes, gaze locked with his as he dug and vibrated blindly into his underarm. Wanyin swore, if he started cooing, he would throttle him. "Is that why sometimes you went to the docks alone, barefoot, and got prissy whenever I tried going with? Xiao A-Cheng was so embarrassed to ask his siblings to tickle him he had to resort to fish?"
Thirst for revenge sparked in Jiang Wanyin. If that was the game his brother wanted to play, he knew how to pay in coin. "Lihihike yohohou wehehere any behehehetter! You uhuhused to drahahahag mehehe to A-Jihihie and say we wahahahanted tihihicklehehes behehecahause yOHOHOU-!" Fingers sneaking to the back of his ribcage followed by a pair of raspberries over the crook of his neck were quick to silence him.
"Ah ah ah!" Wei Wuxian waved a finger at his face. For all his shamelessness, a faint pink dusted his cheeks. (Wanyin could accept this small victory.) "This is your 'losing face' moment, not mine!" Nearly having one of his secrets thrown at their sister's feet didn't deter him from kneading into his back ribs with renewed vigor, nor from sharing a conspiratorial glance with their sister, unbeknownst to the youngest, when he jerked hard enough to almost turn to lay on his side.
A light scribbling of nails up Wanyin's side from his sister- the same side of his torso Wei Wuxian was ruthlessly targeting- sent him trashing to the opposite side to evade the torturously playful sensation. "A-Xian, don't bully him." Yanli chided even as the grin plastered on her face showed she was anything but displeased. Said grin only widened when Jiang Wanyin trashed to the side and flipped over in his momentum as Wei Wuxian suddenly got off him, only to instantly sit over the back his thighs and pin him with his weight as Wanyin's front hit the docks.
Three fingers were held up to Wei Wuxian's temple, the customary 'I'm up to no good' grin radiant on his face. "I'd never, Shijie!" The aforementioned fingers signifying the promise he would not be mean to his brother quickly contradicted themselves by walking upwards to the evil spot between his shoulder blades where Wanyin couldn't reach. "I'm being so nice to our Chengcheng! Who wouldn't love this ugly face?"
Asshole. Ass. Hole.
"I'm gohohohonna breheheak yohour lehehehegs!" Squawks erupted from the youngest as his back was thoroughly (playfully, delightfully) assaulted with his siblings' combined forces, A-Jie scritching lazily at the small of his back while the older man took to prodding every single sensitive area on his upper back and laughing at each embarrassing noise forced out of him. (Squeaks, snorts, fucking squeals. He was never going to live this down.) The red on his cheeks could probably dye a dozen wedding robes.
An overjoyed gasp accompanied by wide, gleaming silver eyes countered his threat, and Jiang Wanyin was alerted that was the wrong thing to say. The worst possible thing he could have said. He could never criticize his brother for running his mouth ever again after sealing his fate like this.
"Shijie! Shijie!" Wei Wuxian beamed before Wanyin could protest, mischief written in every corner of his expression as he met the eldest's eyes while continuing to show less mercy to his beloved brother than he did to enemies on the battlefield. At least most of them died a quick death and didn't have to bear such humiliation- "Did we ever tell you how he came up with that threat?"
Fuck.
Jiang Yanli looked between them in open curiosity. Wanyin suddenly had a newfound appreciation for Nie Huaisang's tactic of hiding behind a fan.
"Dohohon't you dahahare, Wehehei Wuxihihian! Yohohou swohohohore!" Giddy panic flowing through him, reaching deep into his mind and taunting it, pacifying it, paralyzing it all at once, all he could do was writhe. Gentle wiggling fingers explored his lower back with precision, slowing or quickening their pace based on what got the biggest reactions from each spot. Incessant touches trailed up to the back of his neck, fluttering in such a way that had his hairs standing on end, made their diabolical way into the area between the back of his ribs and underarms and-!
Wei Wuxian's hands flew up to cover his own ears at the ear-piercing screech that echoed through the pier. A mere moment of respite for Wanyin's sanity before going back to tasing and tasing and tasing with single-minded focus. "Aiyah, stop trashing! You're gonna hurt Shijie!" Wanyin hadn't even registered whatever it is his arms were doing until his brother had them pinned with a 'tsk' and a torrent of vibrating digits over the bones of his ribcage.
He would have been thankful for Wei Wuxian staying rooted to the upper part of his body rather than drifting downward and unleashing hell, if he didn't know his brother held out purely for suspense. Jerk.
Quickly recovered from the near slap, Jiang Yanli chuckled into his lower back. The vibrations of the sound against covered skin eliciting from him a bubbly little giggle, descending into a hearty laugh as the spot became a target for a horrible, terrible, no good raspberry. "It's alright. A-Cheng will be careful, won't he?"
Wanyin, in his daze, very intelligently chortled wordlessly in return. The pair chose to take it as an affirmative.
"I don't know about that!" Wei Wuxian cackled, dragging fingertips teasingly down his ribcage, down his sides, down his hips and turning to trace past the sides of thighs. A giddy delirium settled in Jiang Wanyin's chest chest the lower those buzzing touches traveled. Instinct demanding he put effort into crawling away, pleading uselessly to a brain overpowered by warmth, fuzziness and a somehow mirthful, light-hearted brand of nervousness as the man neared the spot that would inevitably be his downfall-
Only to jump back to behind his knees.
"Shijie, there's this one spot on his legs I found when we were kids- I'll tell you, gets him kicking and screaming like he's being dragged to his death!" Stage-whispering to the woman over Wanyin's yells of relief and indignation over being tricked, Wei Wuxian leaned in closer to their sister. "He tried getting me there once, he was convinced I'd perish right then and there, because if he's that ticklish there, then everyone has to be at least a little ticklish, right?" Bearing an unfaltering shit-eating grin, Wei Wuxian's agile fingers curled and uncurled masterfully at the taut skin behind his knees. "Nope! Not a sound from me! You should've seen him, pouting like the universe betrayed him! Said if he couldn't get me back fairly he'd have to break my legs instead!"
Jiang Wanyin's face defied the laws of nature by having turned redder than what he thought possible as Jiang Yanli fell into ungraceful laughter. She had to actually withdraw her hands from him to focus on regaining her breath. Wanyin was thankful for small mercies, but at what cost? "No-" A wheezing giggle broke through her words. "No wonder you never took it seriously."
The Sect Leader decided to keep all his focus on not bending his legs– knowing from experience it would be infinitely worse if he trapped Wei Wuxian's fingers– to shelter his sanity from dwindling from both his siblings making fun of him to his face in such a way.
"Please, he's all talk!" The man taunted, each passing of fingertips against the unguarded spot making Wanyin wish he would launch himself into the lake rather than voluntarily sit through this. "I deserved it though. I got him good, he was almost crying!" Were Jiang Wanyin not laying on his stomach, he would have seen the demonic grin that split his face in half. "Like this."
Squeezes fell upon the deathly ticklish spot of his calves and Wanyin screamed.
"TRAHAHAHAHAHAIHIHITOHOHOR!" Overwhelming, overjoying, overbrutal, overpowering. That was all one could describe it as, as the electricity feeling bombarded his body, his nerves, his mind, his everything. Prods upon tases upon spidering sent the man over the edge of coherency, senseless blabbering and screeching spilling out of him like blood from an open wound. Wanyin knew how to deal with wounds, he didn't know how to deal with this.
The only coherent thought he caught hold of was Wei Wuxian better watch his back around Lan Wangji, when the stone-faced man suddenly acquired sensitive information regarding his brother and an uncommon, devastating spot Wanyin swore not to share, as long as Wei Wuxian didn't share his.
"A-Cheng," Jiang Yanli's glee shone in her eyes like the blazing sun. Wanyin looked back before promptly faceplanting onto the wood beneath him when he caught sight of her approaching. Their brother generously conceded her one of his calves, light fluttering joining unforgiving skittering in his gifted concoction of hysteria. "How come you never told me? I'm hurt, you know. I wouldn't have abused that knowledge."
'Because you'd get a kick to the face, that's why!' Crying out to himself he felt the moment the control over his legs snapped, only the fast wind against his pants making him consciously aware of his limbs trashing with no direction. Distantly, he felt his brother holding down his leg and his sister clinging into the other, arms wrapped around it and jiggling fingers pressing directly into it. It was incredible and horrifying, how the material offered no protection whatsoever. Up until now he'd never had reason to curse the thinness of the Jia- "GEHEHEHET OHOHOHOHOUT OF THEHEHEHEHERE!”
"Ah?" Wei Wuxian's speedy squeezes up and down the length of his calf didn't so much as halt as his target flailed. "But look at how much you're smiling! I haven't seen you that happy in- Ever! Maybe if you keep smiling long enough you won't make that ugly wrinkly sour grape face ever again!" The Second Tickle Monster of Lotus Pier earned himself a yelp of maybe annoyance, maybe sheer frenzy between thundering laughs. "Aiyah, don't yell like we're murdering you, we're doing you a favor! We're just looking after our didi's reputat-"
Abruptly, it all came to a stop.
Retracting his hands like they'd been burned, Wei Wuxian staggered backwards.
Jiang Yanli brought a hand to her mouth. Whatever she was hiding behind it, Wanyin couldn't see, couldn't care for it at that moment. His thoughts reeled. Over and over, that word echoed within him.
"Jiang Cheng-" The expression on Wei Wuxian's face was almost, almost blank. Carefully blank, with only the smallest tightening of his lips signifying the turmoil that lay beneath. He'd seen it before, plenty of times, when the other navigated his mother's temper to avoid her lashing out. It didn't belong on his face, not here, not now. Wanyin despised it, wanted to shake it out of him. "I-"
Jiang Wanyin growled. A pulsing strength from gods know where sparked through his muscles and, with a cry, and a gasp from their sister, Wei Wuxian was tackled to the floor.
"About damn time!" Wanyin barked. Panting and shaking from exertion, he dug viciously into the bewildered moron's hips. Wide and shocked silver eyes shut instantly with the force of uncontrollable laughter. The youngest's booming yells carried over it all, each irate-sounding sentence accentuated by a squeeze or vibrating fingers revealing the real care within. "What took you so fucking long?! Am I not good enough to be your brother? I get you out of trouble, I carry you on my shoulder when the Lans beat you, I don't let dogs anywhere near Lotus Pier for your sake, I searched the Middle Kingdom up and down for you for months, and when anyone asks, I'm just your sect brother?! You can rope me into your pranks just fine, but when you actually need help I'm just your shidi?! Wei Ying! Screw you!"
Wei Wuxian gawked dumbly up at him, arching and slithering and convulsing with the sudden attack, clearly not even possessing the presence of mind to actually get away. What's that shocked face for? Did you think I'd pull Zidian on you for hearing what I've been waiting years for? Stupid man!
"You think I can't tell you're going through your own crap and you don't tell anyone? Think you can just go around putting on a smile and I won't see there's anything wrong?" The mere idea had him full-out snarling, channeling each emotion (all the frustration, the love, the exasperation, the sadness) into targeting as many spots as he could reach like that would zap some sense into his brother. "I've known you for fourteen years! What do you take me for, a rock?! What do you take A-Jie for?! You don't think she might want to do more for you than feeding you soup?!" Eyes hardened into a glare bore into Wei Wuxian's while vengeful hands scratched into his underarms. "I'm telling you now, you blind idiot! Get your head out of your ass and quit acting like some forlorn hero doomed to suffer by himself because no one gives enough of a damn about him to want to know what's going on!"
When Wanyin re-opened his eyes post-rant, it was to be greeted by a beet red face and glistening eyes, so many emotions shining through them Jiang Wanyin couldn't even begin to figure them all out. Sentimental gazes locked for a too short yet too long moment, before Wei Wuxian turned tail. "SHIHIHIHIJIHIHIE!" A pleading squeal rung in their ears as Wanyin clawed into a particularly sensitive spot. "HEHEHEHEHELP!"
Jiang Yanli, who had sat silently off to the side, an array of bittersweet feelings visibly passing through her, had her lips curl into a smile that held so much love Wei Wuxian could almost feel it in the air. The woman looked off to the right, to the left, then blinked innocently at him. "Who's your shijie?"
Wanyin had the absolute pleasure of watching realization dawn on him like a sack of bricks. Fucking finally. He committed that gobsmacked look to memory.
"JIHIHIHIE! JIHIHIHIHIE, PLEHEHEHEASE!" Wei Wuxian forced out through sheer giddy desperation, cheeks redder than the ribbon in his now tousled hair. (Jiang Wanyin's was far worse in comparison, but he wasn't going to dwell into that.)
With that cue, quick as lighting, betrayal struck onto Jiang Wanyin in the form of arms wrapped him from behind. "Jihihie!" Wanyin arched uselessly from the wriggling digits latched onto his sides, the firm grip on his torso guaranteeing the hands wouldn't be dislodged even as he squirmed. "Yohohou hehehelp him buhuhut nohot mehehehehe?!"
The man gripped tightly onto the remains of his drive to keep Wei Wuxian subdued and laughing beneath him, switching erratically between spots to keep his brother down and following after him as he writhed. Wanyin's movements grew sloppy as he went through a similar treatment, but the youngest wouldn't let that stop him. Especially with the certainty that as soon as Wanyin let up, it would be him in his place.
"I am helping you!" Jiang Yanli's amused giggles joined their symphony of playfulness. Wanyin could almost hear her mischievous smile over the shriek derived from the surprise raspberry tingling at the center of his spine. "You still have the rest of your gifts!"
Light fingers with years of expertise jumped angles and techniques from one brief moment to the next. Swiping here, fluttering there, squeezing at far too many places and when Yanli resorted to the newfound knowledge she falsely said she wouldn't abuse, the self-control of the proud leader of Yunmeng Jiang broke. Nails ghosting over his calves sent flying his hold over himself and he toppled over, squeezing hard onto wherever his hands landed on Wei Wuxian to steady himself and with a panicked squeal the older man trashed so violently he fell off the dock.
The startled sound in Wanyin's throat hadn't even come out when he scrambled to turn around on his knees to hide his worst spot out of his sister's reach. A flash of her face, then something clasping onto his ankles and dragging him into the lake like a demon.
Feminine laughs resonated through the heart of Lotus Pier, accompanied by no less joyful snickers and shouts as the Two Prides of Yunmeng wrestled in the shallow water, aiming playful hands anywhere they could reach and bickering back and forth like teenagers. "The hell was that for?!" "I fell in because of you! My socks are soaked, Jiang Cheng! This is payback!" "You attack your Sect Leader and you want payback?! I'll show you payback!"
It was maybe an incense stick's time before the eldest coaxed her brothers into climbing back onto the pier, with each man digging into the other's exposed underarms each time they tried, which set them off into yet another round of bickering which progressed into a full-blown attack. Jiang Yanli couldn't bring herself to even feel exasperated. Let her brothers let loose where there'd be no repercussions, let them live out so many years of their adolescence they lost to war.
She worried. Sometimes daring to assume she worried more than her parents did, while they were still of sound mind.
Yanli was under no impression her brothers couldn't care for themselves. They didn't need her as much as they thought, no, but the thought of futurely leaving them to themselves concerned her nearly as much as it thrilled her to soon move into Koi Tower. Not to mention, as Jin-shao-furen she'd find all sorts of new responsibilities on her plate, which meant less time to spend on anything else, including maintaining regular contact with her siblings. If they didn't storm into Koi Tower in a fit of protectiveness if she couldn't make time to answer their letters, that is.
They could look after themselves, that much was true. But she knew, oh, how she knew, just how much they relied on her for much-needed levity.
It warmed her, to see they could still find it amongst themselves.
"Where's everyone else?" Jiang Wanyin gruffly questioned as he sat, pulling out a towel from the qiankun space in his soaked sleeve. (Only an idiotic Jiang cultivator would be caught dead without at least something to dry themselves, given Yunmeng night hunts could easily take them underwater. He didn't know why he was even surprised his brother seemingly didn't have one with him. Go figure! If he thought taking up demonic cultivation made him any less of a Jiang, the idiot can drip water wherever he goes for all Wanyin cares!) "Why has no one come in here while their Sect Leader was being ambushed?"
"Actually, some disciples saw you in, ah- 'a foul mood in the woods.' It's how I found you." The woman quoted what she'd heard with a slightly apologetic quirk of her lips as their brother cackled at Wanyin's not drama, thank you very much. "Word got around and everyone went to work on the other side of the pier. A little extreme, I think."
Jiang Wanyin scowled. "Cowards, all of them! Will they run from a corpse if it looks angry too?!"
Eyes rolling, Wei Wuxian dropped the towel his brother tossed at him in favor of repeatedly poking Wanyin's side. At a safe distance. With the dizi that commanded the dead and took the lives of hundreds. "There you go making that face again. Who the hell so looks angry on their birthday? Stop that!"
"YohOHOU'D-" Poke. "You'd uhUHUSE-" Poke, poke, poke. "You'd uhuhuhuse yohohohour spihihirihituhuhual tool lihihike this?!"
"What better way for Chenqing to meet her shushu?" Ruthless, grinning Yiling Laozu looked back at their sister like Jiang Wanyin's weakened attempts of grabbing his wrist as he kept poking weren't even worth considering. Wanyin wasn't about to grab the dizi itself out of its cultivator hold as if he had no respect for the spiritual weapon, like certain people. "Sh- Jiejie, how many left?"
Jiang Yanli held out her fingers into a number where Wanyin couldn't see– A-Jie, A-Jie, how can you leave your brother in this suspense?��� and no sooner than he was about to voice his protests, the woman gasped. "Oh!" Flashing him a lively grin, she reached for his face. "I want to try something! A-Cheng, does that tickle at all?" A giggle muffled by Wanyin's stubbornly pursed lips as a gentle finger traced the spot behind his ear let them all know that, yes, it did tickle. Jiang Yanli looked utterly fascinated at the discovery. "I helped Luo-guniang with her hair once and she giggled when I touched her ear, I thought that was just her! I didn't know ears could be ticklish!"
Wanyin didn't know either and his pride would have liked him to remain ignorant.
Though the subtle tickly sensation was mild enough to bear with relative dignity and silence (He was not going to lose his composure to a little tickling on such a ridiculous spot. Stay still, stay calm, stay quiet. If Lan Wangji could do it, why couldn't he?), it turned out to be a lot harder when the demonic cultivator figured he didn't want to be left out.
"Luo-guniang... Luo-gunian- Mianmian?!" Wei Wuxian gaped whilst scratching lightly at the same area behind the other ear. "I wouldn't have thought, with that annoyed face she always has." The man snickered at the shudder that coursed through Wanyin's body at their sister's brief raspberry on the small spot, which he instantly mimicked. "Like you, didi! I think you'd be good friends!"
"Mahahaybe you ohonly ehehever see her annohohoyehed becahause you're around her!"
He saw Wei Wuxian actually pout from the comment. Xianxian is three indeed. Really, his shift to that babyish behavior around A-Jie (Lan Wangji, too- and wasn't that a disgusting thought?) should be studi-"Eheheek!"
Wanyin froze. He should have appreciated that childish pout more. He discovered he much preferred it over what came after.
Slowly, bit by bit, Wei Wuxian's lips curled into a diabolical grin. The finger that accidentally brushed over Wanyin's cheek as he squirmed now tapping his own in mocking contemplation. "Ooohh, what's this now?"
Jiang Wanyin blinked.
No way. There was no way. What was he, ticklishness on two legs?
Jiang Yanli, on the other hand, could not look more delighted and Wanyin dumbly let himself be pulled towards her as arms encircled him, holding him in place. "A-Xian." Mischievousness and affection washed over the woman's face, a combination that Wanyin knew did not bode well for him. "Do you want to see something I used to do when A-Cheng was still a baby?"
Through Wei Wuxian's enthusiastic affirmations, Wanyin felt fingers cradling his chin and gently tilting his head to the side. In that quick moment the action triggered something in him. A switch flipped, and even as he wasn't touched, he found himself fighting a wobbly smile. An instinct that felt strangely innate, like he'd had it his whole life and was only not rediscovering it. Which was unwarranted, because he was not ticklish there, surely. People just weren't ticklish there.
Right? "...Jie?"
"You were too little, you probably don't remember." Jiang Yanli simply kept on grinning, patting his shoulder consolingly at his questioning tone. "But you always loved it when I did it, sometimes it'd be the only thing that would get you to stop crying. Let me know if it rings any bells, okay?"
Her face was brought to his cheek and, oh- Oooh.
The mind might not consciously recall, but the body holds memories still.
"Whahahat the hehehell-" Against his will, Jiang Wanyin somehow, through means beyond his comprehension, felt himself relax. Under gentle nuzzling and butterfly kisses, pink blossomed in his cheek. Squeaks jumped gleefully from his tongue; it was unbecoming, but at that moment, it didn't matter. Overtook by a joyful calm, strange and foreign, which he couldn't bring himself to bristle away from.
Or could, yes. But he didn't want to.
Loved. Safe.
"Ihihit's weheheheheheIHIHIhird-!"
"Poor, poor Zewu-jun. Won't even get to kiss his future husband on the cheek without getting his eardrums pierced!" Yet again Wei Wuxian theatrically brought his hands to his own ears with a sharp laugh as the youngest squealed from the woman's lips blowing against his skin. Just for that comment alone Wanyin shoved his face away before he could even try doing the same. "Don't forget you still have two more! Ready?"
Oh so now he wanted to be considerate?!
"Now yohohou ask if I'm reheheady?" Wanyin realized the incredible feat of grumbling between giggles. Neither of them mentioned how it had absolutely no bite to it. "Gehehet it over wihihith!"
Sneaky glances exchanged, a plan formed without his knowledge, twin raspberries against each cheek and Jiang Wanyin saw stars.
An explosion of sensation. An overload of his senses. Head shaking wildly. Thoughts spinning. Mirthful snickers ringing in his ears. (Was that him?) Loosened hair flying in the wind. Fire on his cheeks. Obnoxious sounds from each side. Fragrances of lotus flowers and freshwater. Home.
So this is what it's like, to forget everything and let go.
Content Conflicted as he was, even the strongest cultivator only had so much stamina. "Fihihine, fihihihine!" He wheezed after his laughter neared on breathless and they just kept going. "Okahahay, enohough!"
With none of the grace and elegance of a renowned young master, Jiang Wanyin let himself collapse to the floor the moment he'd been released. A panting, disheveled, flushed mess of red and purple against hard wood.
Recovering his breath through shut eyes, he felt the two lying on each side of him, close enough he could feel their warmth heating his still damp clothes. Trusting his siblings not to strike again, Wanyin crossed his arms underneath his head, gazing up at the cloudless sky.
All in all, as far as birthday celebrations went, this wasn't the worst.
"A-Cheng." Jiang Yanli's soft hum broke through the lulling sound of lazy waves. Wanyin turned his head to look back at her in question. "How are you feeling?"
Blissful. Cared for. Exhausted.
He huffed a laugh. "Takes more than that to beat me, jie."
Beside him, Wei Wuxian looked far too plotting for someone within tickling distance. "NoteHEHED-!"
"Next year-" Jiang Wanyin's terrifying smirk would have sent shivers down anyone's spine as he retreated the clawed hand he'd used to fake lunge at the man. "You are so dead."
"Your birthday's only a few days from mine, there's gonna be no time for my thirst for revenge to die down. Think of that next year." The Head Disciple very maturely stuck out his tongue, shielding the spot that had almost been attacked.
Jiang Yanli wisely stayed silent, well aware she'd find a way to join in on both events and still walk away mostly un-destroyed. (It could be useful, sometimes, to be thought of as so fragile.)
Comfortable silence had reigned among them, until Wei Wuxian tapped Chenqing against his shoulder.
"Jiang Cheng..." The man trailed off with the same cautious tone he took after slipping up and calling him 'didi.' Wanyin raised him an unimpressed eyebrow. "You really don't mind?"
Nevermind respect. Wanyin was going to grab that dizi and bash his head with it. Even A-Jie huffed in exasperation.
"When have you ever cared about what I think? Don't pretend to start now!" Jiang Wanyin swallowed the sudden bashfulness that arose with a passing thought. Just this once. Just this once to get his idiot brother to finally understand. "....Ge."
Wei Wuxian squealed out in delight. "What?"
"Shut up! And quit with that face! I'm not saying it again!”
༺🪷 Extras🪷༻
Jiang Wanyin: You'd use your spiritual tool like this?!
Wei Wuxian, who's used Suibian for dumb things like cutting watermelons and will in the future do far more unholy things with Bichen: :D
Jiang Wanyin explaining to Lan Wangji how he drew genuine happiness out of WWX in his Yiling Laozu Era: Alright you better fucking take notes, because I am not explaining this again.
Jiang Wanyin: Sect Leader Nie and Jin Guangyao are close and I don't see anyone calling them cut-sleeves!
NMJ and JGY, somewhere, in the middle of passionately making out: Strange, my ear feels warmer all of a sudden.
Jiang Wanyin being wrecked without an ounce of mercy: Please, I can deal with tickling, I'm not a pussy.
Jiang Wanyin minutes later discovering the existence of melt spots: WHAT IS THIS SORCERY???
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plutowrites · 3 years ago
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I love the way you write for Zeke so much🥺do you have any headcanons for what it would be like being in a relationship with him?
aww thanks cutie ♡♡ and here ya goooo
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Relationship Headcanons w/ Zeke Yeager
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he's an early riser and likes to ~bike in those first few hours after sunrise. he always returns back with your favourite drink for you to wake up to. except for on sundays because that's when he lets himself sleep in with you (he's a huge cuddle monster)
also, brunch is mandatory on sundays. it's tradition. you both look forward to it(!!) afterwards, you two like to visit any local shops around the area like the book store, antique shop, music store, candle shop etc,,
BANTER. so much banter. 
teases you all the time but does it while he’s being affectionate so it evens it out. like he’ll twirl a strand of your hair and gaze at you lovingly as he makes fun of your childish taste buds or he’ll cup your chin, rubbing it as he insults your choice of pajamas.
he’s the type of partner that includes you in any of the plans he makes with his friends. you shy away from attending all the time because it’s like ?? don’t you just wanna be with your boys?? wouldn’t i just be a hindrance? but he always offers even when he knows you’ll decline.
tells the best stories. really big on cadence and sound effects. be prepared for him to come home after work with a story to share.
can cook but would much rather be on cleaning duty. besides, he prefers your cooking over his own.
he loves rewatching tv shows and movies from his childhood, nostalgia is big for him. if you’re watching too, he’ll pause it right before his favourite parts come on and whisper ‘look, this scene is the best’ or ‘i love this part’ as he taps your thigh gently in excitement. you can see his inner child come out when you watch with him and it’s the sweetest thing-- his eyes grow all wide and he wraps the two of you in the same blanket, draped over your shoulders like superhero capes. he loves when you lean your head on his shoulder too.
he tags you in posts EVERYWHERE. twitter, instagram, facebook and dare i say it...linkedin..AND you always remind him to just send it to you instead of tagging you and he just brushes you off, saying that he forgets that the dm function exists :/ he’s annoying
tells waiters at whatever restaurants you go to that it’s your birthday so they can gather up all the workers to sing happy birthday to you. YOU HATE HIM for it but he loves to see that flustered blush on your face when all the attention is on you. also likes the free cake that comes along with it.
there aren’t a lot of arguments in the relationship, Zeke never lets any miscommunication go as far as actual fighting but when he senses your frustration he’ll stop being his usual sarcastic self and just hold out his arms for you,
“okay, pause. c’mere.”
“I don’t want a hug.”
“That’s fair but my arms will still be open just in case.”
And you’ll turn into complete GOO and melt into a puddle because of his sweetness :(
always reminding you that the world is yours and that whatever you want to do/accomplish he will be there behind you every step of the way.
Zeke is just the best support system there is. simple as that.
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appledotcodotuk · 3 years ago
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why the hive fckin suck at its job: a rant
spoilers for tgwdlm ahead!
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first of all, it's important to consider what exactly the hive's job is. my answer is... who the fuck knows. literally. what is the hive's aim. what do you want Paul? more like, what do you want hive? let's find out!
it kinda evolves, as the play progresses. the intial aim of the hive, and one that does actually remain consistent is the constant burning need to grow and devour and gain more and more (insert capitalism metaphor here).
however, this is distorted by the people it possess who influence that aim, as we'll see later.
also the fact it crashes into a theatre displaying Mamma Mia gives the hive the motive it need to fit the world around it to the structure of the musical. having no originality of its own, the hive instead just picks up what is given to it. kinda like an evil baby.
it wants uniformity, that is indeed its ultimate goal and desire, no duh. it thinks it can achieve that through musical theatre, shame that the hive is dead wrong. cause the hive fucking sucks at its own job / aim / ultimate purpose / one concrete goal that motivates all its actions.
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can't maintain control over its subjects
okay, so, the hive wants uniformity. it wants everyone to be dancing to the beat of its own tune. right? yeah. shame it literally can't keep its own possessed subjects in line at all. at the risk of sounding like the 10th doctor waxing lyrical abt humanity for the 50th time, humans are really difficult to control cause we're not really motivated by an altruistic allegiance to one primary good. we've got icky emotions that often move us to do stupid unpredictable stuff way more. it makes me wonder if the reason the hive wanted to use musical theatre to try and persuade ppl was cause it seems to think that is how theyll get emotive humans; through emotive songs. anyways. let's look at some examples shall weeeee?
Mr Davidson:
so, Mr Davidson. funnily enough, he's the guy whose in part acting as the hive trying to figure out what it wants through his interactions w/ Paul. every person it possess gives it just a bit more humanity and curiosity abt the world it is currently taking over. at least I think so. hence why as the musical develops u get character's like possessed!Alice wondering 'why does it hurt to love?' - the change in music and mood to something much more introspective really suggests to me that the hive is beginning to question the thoughts and emotions of its human hosts.
Mr Davidson is a family man through and through, he loves his wife Carol. she's his muse, his source of light. his feelings for her are not concrete or easy to explain and solve - hence why his sudden ahem demand of her is so hilarious and also jarring. it completely clashes with the 'I want song' which is simple, and often pushes forward a wider cause. not so with Mr Davidson, he just really loves his wife man. enough to break a frickin alien possession.
tbh I think its hilarious that (at least to me) the hive has to force him to forget and continue with the song, like, he straight up is just talking to his wife in that phone call, talking, not singing. so, no possession until he reverts back into song. ergo, the hive cannot maintain the uniformity it wants. even from the get go when theoretically its control should be stronger cause it has less ppl to co-ordinate. bad. at. its. job.
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Paul:
this one hurts folks. yes, I know it's generally agreed, though somewhat debated that the state of Paul by the end of the tgwdlm is not purely possessed. I agree. once again, the hive is unable to truly enforce uniformity.
at this point, the motives of Paul and the hive are kinda just mixed, neither fully human nor fully alien. hence the constant shifts between pleeing for her to get away, to hide, to stay safe: 'what if the only choice is you have to sing to survive' and just full on old style hive nastiness 'let me puke in your mouth and just open your food bin girl' (so romantic 🥰 /j).
the hive has gone away from its original aim, and become something... different. no longer stuck to just one type of genre or style of song, it's really clever to show the developing complexity of the hive by showing how it is now juggling lots of different motifs with references to all the old songs from before recontextualised in a new way - its learning. evil baby... no longer uniform.
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general miscommunication:
there are several instances of the hive not fully having uniform control over its subjects. for instance, right after not your seed with the three teens having to like... calibrate. they aren't just completely connected then?? also, this is a very small thing, but uhhhh at the end of inevitable when Paul is about to say the apotheosis is upon... the chorus interrupts him with USSSSSSS. interruptions??? not very in sync of u hive.
I think this inability to exert uniformity is also shown in the contrast between genre of musical theatre. my alien abomination cannot decide whether it wants to be the more modern edgy rock musical (join us (and die), not your seed ) or super happy go lucky old style musical theatre (lah dee dah dah day, and inevitable). it tries to do both, even while trying to encourage union, and sticking to one thing. hypocrite!!!!!
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2. aims are guided by the people it possess
so, I mentioned this a bit already, but the hive isn't only mutating the humans, the humans are mutating the hive right back. this is more an interesting observation than any actual analysis but let's goooo.
greenpeace girl:
I think it's very likely that greenpeace girl is one of the first to be possessed. This is probably easily debunkable but whatever this analysis is flying by the seat or its pants anywayyyyy. why? cause where else would it pick up that whole 'this planet needs fixing' thing? it's interesting too, cause it morphs from expressing the desire to join hands and sing together, unity and peace with no actual action behind it. this then goes right to the other end, with the hive going 'fine I'll do it myself' and trying to save things by enforcing a dictatorship on the world. it develops and changes, and strays from its original means of accomplishing its aims! speaking oooooof...
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3. inconsistent in means of accomplishing aims
okay, ur an evil hive mind. u think musicals are the way to win over these silly humans cause they're all weak and emotive and seem to respond to them. but, wait! schwoopsie! you haven't realised that for emotional depth and growth to mean anything, you need there to be established development and well... growth. otherwise the sentiments are as vague as the ones expressed in What Do You Want, Paul?
this show has genuine emotional moments, just not really during the musical numbers WITH EXCEPTIONS. any strife is smoothed over quickly, and so the development and change that would have to go into such growth is just gone. (see, You Tied Up My Heart) all so it can achieve its own desire to grow and grow and grow, maybe a metaphor for art being killed under late stage capitalism??
what actually matters is the impact the songs have afterwards, in causing a death - because we have a bond and care abt these characters. those short scenes between Paul and Emma are actually way more resonant than any song. except... inevitable, and also not your seed a bit. at this point the hive has learnt a thing or two, and can actually twist human emotion a little. but for it to do that, it has to reject the uniformity it prizes, and be adaptable. point towards being more human than it first thought? methinks so. and yet it's just not enough...
it's also why let it out, to me, feels really ingenuine. Paul has expressed himself in much better ways already. what they're doing is clearly paining him, and hurting the guy. he's terrified bless.
you can't force someone into being emotional vulnerable, man.
it's why all the deaths for the characters who are forced to express themselves are really violent, involving them being ripped open - literally forcing them to expose themselves from the 'inside out' as Alice reflects in Not Your Seed. you can't force genuine emotional connection, it has to be fostered, shown in the much more affecting relationship of Paul and Emma. the only reason the hive actually has power over our characters is because of these genuine emotional connections, which it tries and often fails to take advantage of, resulting in just resorting to brute violence. messy hive, very messy.
at the core, the musical's a kinda attack on that toxic positivity mindst: trying to force people to reach the sort of easy solutions by sharing feelings in a way that feels pretty invasive and deciding you are instantly fixed. the problems these characters face are jarringly not really what you'd expect a character in a musical to face, cheating, a lot of it, mid-life crisis. problems that are bland, or wayyyy too real. this is purposefully done, to reveal just how silly the hive's aim to use musical theatre to solve everyone's problem is. life is more complex than that smh.
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4. a human can write a much more expressive, and genuine song than they ever could lol
u know which song I'm talking abt. what more is there to say. so much for making persuasive songs to tempt people over.
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5. make me sad cause they took some perfectly nice ppl and funked them up 😭
this was a stupid point lol. basically I'm just bitter that this hive took a bunch of perfectly okay ppl and gave them hive brain. screw u hive. I swear I'm gonna watch Black Friday soon, cause I'm sure it's gonna completely destroy every thought I've had so far, but whateve,,, just take this as a look at tgwdlm like it's a stand-alone piece.
these guys are supposed to all be 'individuals' on one level, but also 'appendages of a much larger organism'. there's a little too much individualism and fracturing to be cohesive enough to do that I feel. the hive to me is not an infallible, unstoppable force, in fact, every human it takes over only brings it closer to understanding us. so that's maybe a slight positive note??? idk ?! I just have lots of thoughts and feelings abt this musical even if this doesn't make sense I'm proud i wrote it down hehe.
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technobladestanblog · 3 years ago
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sands of time let's goooo miscommunication between teammates is the worst to watch live but also so satisfying cause I hate miscommunication and I hope it humbles literally everyone 😂
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blurred-inventory · 3 years ago
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Ship: Kurotsuki
Kuroo Tetsuroo/Tsukishima Kei (HQ)
ok so they play the same position (middle blocker) and the third gym scene means they’re rivals, which is easy to ship. and this can go angsty bc in third gym tsuki is emotionally dumb and kuroo is a “provocator” so uhhh potential for miscommunication. anyways it’s funny cause they’re both Smart Snarky Students and can banter. bonus points for being dorks about science (dinosaurs or chemistry).
also tsuki retreats into his headphones a lot, and kenma is kuroo’s best friend, so gotta love that introvert rep.
Listed below are some of my fav kurotsuki fanfics! Links are all to ao3.
your hand in mine, darling we’ll be fine  by randomprose (Gen, 7k)
domesticity and established relationship lets goooo this is so easy and comfortable to read. they’re Adults.
love and a cough  by batman (T, 5k)
batman is such a fantastic crack-y writer and this is so stupid (affectionate) ahaha. like it goes off on tangents that feel so random yet somehow circle back to the point of the story. tetsu’s POV is so mischievous, “there was only one bed”
The Last Red Scribble by doggoneit (T, 8k)
Wrong Number AU, Single Parent AU. the banter is hilarious. and this is so heartwarming
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thirstyandbeautiful · 4 years ago
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lando vs lance part 12
scorpio fight lets goooo
recap on part 11 here
You don’t know how long you stared at your ceiling for. All you know is it must’ve been a while since when you did snap out of it, you were cold. You hadn’t even bother crawling under your sheets. You sighed and told yourself to get up. To shake some feeling back in your jellied legs so you could go shower. You could shower and wash away tonight from your mind and body.
It would be a lie to say that you weren’t disappointed. You felt like you were taken completely off guard, and you grabbed your phone on your way to the bathroom. You turned the shower on, letting the water warm as you reread your messages. 
The ache between your legs made your eyes tear. You realized that you and Lando had never had the discussion that you and Lance had had. Lando had invited you out, but the word date was never there. You had had fun, but looking back you became hyper aware of the amount of times Lando took every excuse to touch or flirt with you. 
You felt annoyed as you realized the miscommunication could mean Lando thought you were looking for a new fuck buddy to replace Lance. That annoyance grew as you realized that you didn’t want a fuck buddy anymore, no, you had been teased with the idea of a boyfriend and now that was what you wanted.
You cursed under your breath as Lando texted you while you were still reading the chat, his message immediately getting a read receipt. 
thanks for tonight xx
You felt numb as the little dots at the bottom of the screen popped back up. 
waiting for me?
You locked your screen and threw open the shower door, letting the steam envelope your stressed body.
-
You were just throwing the lanyard that your badge dangled off of over your head when the door knocked. You felt some anxiety as you approached the door, hesitantly looking out the peep hole. When you saw Lance, you relaxed.
You unlatched and opened the door. “Hey.”
“Hey, do you want a ride to the track?” Lance shyly smiled at you. You couldn’t help but smile back.  
“I just need to grab my stuff and I’ll be ready to go. You had good timing.” 
Lance nodded at you and leaned against the archway. You had to look away when you saw he was leaning against it the same way Lando had last night. 
“So,” Lance sighed. “How was your date?” 
You grabbed your totepack and threw it over your shoulder, walking up to Lance. “It was fine.” 
Lance tilted his head, a small smile on his face. “Just fine?”
You laughed, “I had a good time, we had fun.”
“But it was ‘just fine’” 
You rolled your eyes. He looked so smug, a light blush on his cheeks about the night being ‘just fine’. You weren’t going to burst his bubble. You really didn’t want to tell him how good the sex was and you definitely didn’t want to mention that it wasn’t even a date.
You felt your smile falter as those thoughts crossed your mind, but Lance didn’t even notice. He ducked down unexpectedly and pressed his lips to yours. You felt yourself lean in to him. The kiss didn’t have any rush or fire, it was just his lips pressed to yours for a few seconds before he pulled away.
You looked up at him as he stood up straight again. He ran his hand through his hair and looked away from you.  
“Come on,” you poked his arm and walked around him. “We’re gonna be late.” 
-
You and Lance had walked in silence to the car. When you got into the car, he broke the silence to tell you to connect your phone to the speakers and choose the music for the ride.
The car filled with your music taste as he drove towards the paddock. You were partially turned in towards the center console, so it was easy to catch Lance’s glances at you. This is the man who knew your body literally inside and out, and yet he had somehow become shy towards you since he revealed he wanted more. 
You thought it was cute. 
When he parked the car, he unbuckled his seatbelt and leaned back. It was normal for you two to sometimes catch rides together, but you were careful to not be seen coming and going together. You always left the car first when you arrived and walked to the car last when you left. 
“Do you wanna hang out in my room tonight?” Lance’s words came out so quick as you turned off your bluetooth. 
“What did you just say?” 
“Do you,” He had dramatically slowed down his speech and earned a slap in the arm from you. “Do you,” he tried again at normal speed, “want to hang out in my room tonight after this press day is over?” 
“Yes.” Lance nodded, a small smile on his face as he turned to look out his window. You giggled and leaned over the center console. 
“Hey,” you whispered. 
When Lance turned back towards you you pressed your lips to his the same way he had done to you in the hotel room. You pulled away and climbed out the car without another word. 
Lance watched you walk away through the rear view mirror.  
-
Press days never failed to exhaust him. The constant questions all seemed to ask the same things, the journalists just reworded it each time to try to sound different. It was like a mental tug of war to keep his PR friendly face on and keep his answers consistent. Now that all he had to do was finish this last one and leave, he found himself eager to get back to his room with you. 
Just one more to go.
This was a joint press conference. He nodded at Alex and Pierre as he lined up outside the press room next to them, the two drivers already deep in conversation, probably something AT related with the way they kept their voices low. 
“Hey mate.” Lance pushed away the urge to roll his eyes as Lando leaned against the wall next to him. “How’s it going?”
“It’s press day.” 
“It is, it is.” Lando hummed. “What have you been up to?”
Lance sighed, not in the mood to play games with Lando. “I know you went out with her last night.”
“Oh, yeah. I did.” Lance didn’t bother looking at Lando, his smug tone was enough. “It was a good night.”
“I heard. She said it was fine.” Lance willed himself not to smile while he was met with a momentary silence. 
“You were with her this morning?” Lance nodded and instantly regretted it as he heard Lando snort. “I’m starting to think you like cleaning up after me.” 
Lance looked down at Lando, “I’m starting to think you actually think you have a chance.”
“I’ve shown her what I can offer twice now, and we both know what happened the first time.”
“Sub dropping her doesn’t make you special.” He rolled his eyes.
“You expect me to believe you’ve dropped her?”
“Just shut up, Lando.” Lance groaned. “I’ve had her for a year-”
“Yet she still came to me.” Lando chuckled and further emphasized his meaning. “came on to me, and came on me.” 
“Is that why she was kissing me this morning?” Lance fired back.
“Could you still taste me on her tongue?”
Lance shoved Lando back, the smaller man stumbling back. A press official hurried over, putting their arm between them. 
“Are you two crazy? Save it for the track. You have all of them in there and you want to put on a show. Get it together.” 
-
Heard you tried to kill lando?
Lance: steward broke it up before i could finish the job
omg you’re serious 
Lance: he was talking shit. how did you even find out?
you were the talk of the paddock town
Lance: great.
maybe don’t shove another driver?
Lance: it was your fault
even more the reason to NOT shove another driver
Lance: am i still seeing you later
.... what do you think ??
“Hey you.” 
You looked up from your phone and came face to face with a grinning Lando. “Hey yourself.” 
“You’re not in a very good mood, where’s that gorgeous smile?” He took a step forward into your space. “Want me to put you in a better mood?”
“Lando,” you seethed. “Please, not in public.”
“I thought you wanted to go public?”
“Excuse me?” 
“I talked to Lance before,” he shrugged “and before he pushed me, he seemed to believe you were trying to decide between the two of us.”
You really didn’t want to have this talk at the paddock. You looked both ways before you grabbed him and pulled him into an empty office nearby. You slammed the door shut and turned to him. 
“I am trying to decide between the two of you.” Lando’s head tilted and his eyes narrowed at you. “Lance, when he found out that I had taken his permission and actually fucked you,” Lando mouthed the word ‘permission’ back to you. “he let me know that he, he wanted something more than the arrangement we’ve had for the past year.” 
Lando slowly walked you back towards the door while you rambled on. “I realized after you left that we hadn’t had that discussion and that’s completely my fault, I-”
“I wanna punish you so badly right now.” Lando spoke lowly. “I wanna bend you over my knee and spank you until you cry.” You shivered. 
“Lando-” His hand came up and squeezed your throat. 
“Daddy.” You breathlessly corrected yourself. “I’m-”
“Do not say you’re sorry.” He chuckled before he let go of your neck and took some steps back to leave your personal space. “You think he could ever drop you like me? You’re seriously struggling to choose between us?” 
You had never seen Lando angry before.
“You do realize he’ll never fuck you like I do, right?” 
You felt a weird sort of defensive front come over you. “I have been fucking him for a year, you really think I’d settle for some mediocre dick for that long?”
Lando leaned back and huffed. “Unbelievable. I can’t believe we’re having this conversation. You want to settle for a boyfriend.” 
You looked down at your feet. “I haven’t chosen anyone yet.”
“Who said I want to be your boyfriend?” 
Your head snapped up as you looked at Lando. He walked around you and pulled you from the door. Instead of pulling you to him like you expected, he pushed you away from it and grabbed the door to open it. When he was halfway out the doorway he turned to look at you over his shoulder.
“Think about it.”
You were so fucking confused.
-
At the end of the day, you caught a ride back to the hotel with one of your coworkers. You rode the elevator with them and thanked your lucky stars when they mentioned that you were on a floor by yourself, all your coworkers had apparently been put several floors above you. 
Moments like that reminded you what you would have to deal with eventually. You would have to tell your boss you were dating a driver, and while that wouldn’t effect either of your jobs, it was still something you had to disclose. You wondered if you’d be kept from traveling and felt a sliver of panic before you quickly pushed the thought away. 
You don’t even know what you want yet
You remembered Lando’s comment and sighed. 
Fuck, what did he even mean? 
You felt frustrated and dragged your feet to your door as you thought of whether or not Lando was boyfriend material. You hadn’t considered that he might just want to fill Lance’s shoes in your arrangement. You felt naive and embarrassed for a moment, before you thought back to how angry he had gotten. If he had been angry about the assumption, he would have said it. He was angry about you not choosing. You didn’t even know what to think as the intense scene played over and over in your mind. 
You threw your stuff down once you were in your room and showered. You moved through the motions while trying to relax yourself. When you came out, you opened your suitcase and dug to the bottom for your comfier clothes. You were only hanging out, and Lance had seen you at your best and worst, so you didn’t feel the need or expectation to put on makeup or dress up. You pulled on a crewneck and some leggings along with your phone and keycard before you left your room. 
You were still shaking the thoughts from your head when you approached Lance’s door. 
You were exhausted mentally, and were happy that Lance just wanted a chill night in. That’s all he ever really wanted, now that you thought about it. Lance was much more laid back. He liked to have fun and do things with his inner circle, which you realized included you, but he wasn’t very flashy and he was very private. He kept a good low profile. 
Your thoughts were disrupted when Lance opened the door. He greeted you and moved to the side to let you in. You plopped down on the bed and rolled until you were face down towards the center. 
“Long day?” You felt the bed shift next to as he settled next to you and grabbed the remote. 
“Not as long as yours.” You turned your face and narrowed your eyes at him, not really meaning anything but to tease him. 
“He deserved it.” Lance pouted and kept his eyes on the tv as he scrolled through netflix.
You giggled and when he looked down at you, you smiled at him. “Didn’t seem to do enough though, he looked fine to me.”
That caught his attention. “You saw him?” He asked.
“Yeah, he was a little upset about the whole choosing thing.”
“Did you end up having sex?”
You dramatically sighed. “No, Lance.” You traced the pattern in the comforter that covered the bed before you added, “You’re the only one I sneak around the actual paddock with.” 
You laughed when Lance mumbled a curse under his breath. You pulled yourself up, throwing his arm out of your way so you could cuddle into his chest. 
Lance laughed. “You won’t be able to see the screen like this.”
“I don’t care.”
You felt Lance kiss the top of your head. “You know it could be like this every weekend we’re away.”
“Laying it on thick, aren’t you?” 
“Don’t I always?” You looked up at Lance and bit your lip. He tapped your nose with his finger. “None of that tonight.” 
You playfully pouted before you rested your cheek against his shoulder so you could stay looking up at him. “You’re very pretty, did you know that?”
Lance bit back a smile, a light blush dusted his cheeks before he replied. “Now I do.”
“Awwww, the blushing makes you cuter.” 
“Am not blushing.” He mumbled, his face getting redder and his smile wider. 
“Are to.” He covered your eyes with one of his big hands, making you laugh.
“I will kick you out of my room.” He threatened.
“You would never.” 
Your eyes were still covered when you felt Lance’s mouth on yours. It was another sweet kiss, a gentle press of lips with no tongue and no urgency. It was familiar, like he was trying to mold his lips to yours with feather light kisses. It felt like making out but not dirty as usual, your chest tingled as you realized that this was intimacy.
Lance pulled away at the same time he dropped his hands from you. You felt dazed as you sighed into his chest and snuggled back into him. You brought your hand up and rested it on him as your finger traced your lower lip. You could still feel him against it. 
“I like when you kiss me like that.” You mumbled. 
Lance pulled you closer. “I’d kiss you like that everyday if you let me.”  
Later, when the tv volume was turned all the way down and you laid lifeless and boneless in a heap that covered half his body, Lance ran his fingers through your hair. He looked at your peaceful face, and couldn’t help but open his mouth even though he knew you couldn’t hear him.
“I love you.”
Read part 13 here
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honeyhenry · 5 years ago
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traitor - b.b (part 5)
part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4
A/N: oooo one more part to goooo and perhaps an epilogue! this one took me ages and i am so sorry but i hope it makes up for it! also i tried to check and edit it but its literally 1am soooo any mistakes are also mine lol
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Faint bruises. Tangled hair. He has nothing to lose.
‘You have no idea how much I wish he was mine too’
Bucky tenses, aware of the tiny grip still clutching onto his hand, now fiercely protective of the wide eyed baby he has loved so fully since he first knew of them.
‘You shouldn’t be here, Steve’
He doesn’t need a long winded explanation from the man who is in competition for this child’s parentage. But as his friend, a reminder of what the Captain once meant to Bucky, he owes Steve at least the chance to provide an answer as to what the fuck has been going on behind his back.
However, Bucky’s thoughts don’t always line up with the words that end up leaving his mouth, and he starts rambling on, finding that he is only so emotional and angry when his family are involved.
‘Have you come to gloat about it then? Was cheating on your own wife with mine not enough?! Could you not have knocked up your own wife and saved all this bullshit?’
Steve’s heart plunges as he takes a seat on the rocking chair - noting its similarity to the one he had planned on building last year in his own house, next to his own room, for his child.
‘I-I did.”
“What? You sayin’ you did sleep with my wife you damn punk?!”
“No!” he cries, just as Bucky heads towards Steve, his metal hand curled into a fist so tight that he’s glad the baby can’t see over the edge of the crib to view the man he recognised as safe become the dangerous weapon he had hoped had vanished without a trace.
“I did...I did get my own wife pregnant, I did. We were…she, she was due a month before y/n was.’
Steve doesn't have to say what happened or “she lost it” for Bucky to understand. He’s glad Steve doesn't have to.
The Captain swallows back the heavy emotion caught in his throat, choking out the rest of his sentence as if he was struggling to breathe; ‘Our baby sweetpea. God, nothing can compare to that love you feel, you know? When you find out after trying and getting a nursery set up and nicknames and just thinking of everything they could someday be. We were so excited, and then to hear that y/n was due the month after us and- and everything was meant to be okay.’
Bucky remembers throwing each and every punch at this broken shell of a man only days ago, who was crumbling before him once more, but this time purely in an emotional sense, not physical, as the strong barrier he’d put up to protect himself and his wife was being demolished bit by bit at each passing second of his confession.
‘Steve..fuck Steve I never in-’ he tries to speak but he stops. It wouldn’t do any good. He can’t bring the Rogers’ baby sweetpea back. And nothing will.
‘Buck, I need you to understand that your son is not mine. I spent the two days before leaving for the mission with my own wife. Nothing happened I swear, i didnt even see y/n. We’re just trying to piece everything back together but its been a year and...I don’t think its gonna happen for us.’ He sobers up, sniffing after the slow fall of tears tracing down his face come to a halt.
Bucky knows he’s been a real punk, an asshole, deserving of a good beating himself. He should’ve been there helping his friend get through such hard times, not beating him up over false accusations. 
“Steve, don’t say that. Sometimes it can just take a little while. I’m always around to talk. End of the line, et cetera.”
He pats his friend on the back as they embrace in a tender hug. A silent promise to each other that there’ll be no further miscommunication or bitter, unsaid words.
The two men peer over the crib, and Bucky smiles sadly at the blue eyed beauty resting there. It was a comfortable silence, gazing at his namesake, until Steve piped up with a chuckle.
‘He’s gonna have your hair y’know. Your ma always showed me pictures back in the day and you were blonde before you were even walkin’.” Bucky grins, remembering the pictures laden on the windowsill of his childhood home, showcasing a happy toddler James. The normalcy of the moment is comforting. “And he has your hands” Steve continues,”He’s a sturdy little guy, he’s gonna be so much fun, Buck. He's already big for his age, too.”
Bucky can quickly understand why Steve is so knowledgeable on this topic, and how he can so easily reassure him, realising that for 2 sweet months, Steve had thrown himself into the role of ‘daddy’ to his own unborn child. The Sergeant goes to apologise again, still barely able to understand his pain but fully aware that his best friend did not deserve this.
“Steve, I can’t even begin to describe to you how sorry I am, from the bottom of my heart...I trust you, I do. I just- JJ is my weakness. I can’t lose him, or y/n. He’s our little piece of heaven.”
The father moves to wrap his hands under the armpits of his baby, picking up the round cuddly boy who coos and kicks his fat little legs. He rests happily in Bucky’s arms, knowing he is safe, surrounded by love, and at home. He rests a hand on Bucky’s cheek and beams a sweet smile towards his Daddy.
“Hi buddy, yeah it’s daddy, daddy’s got you now, and look! Uncle Stevie is here!” He turns the sweet babe in his arms towards Steve, who smiles goofily, as Bucky plants a kiss on JJ’s cherubic cheek. They play around a little with JJ, the baby heartily laughing every time Bucky made him fake-punch Steve in the chest or face. After a while, as JJ settles against his father’s chest, revelling in the comfort Bucky provides, Steve quirks his head up, a question coming to mind that he hadn't thought to ask.
“Who even put that idea into your head anyways?”
“...Sam.”
“Buck...Sam?! You can’t have thought jack about anything that Sam has to say. He really is a bird brain sometimes, God, you really based this off of Sam, huh?”
Bucky blushes, hiding behind a soft, nervous chuckle. He really has no explanation or defence for what he did. All he knows is that he's got to resolve it.
“Steve can you take J? I’ve got a Momma to apologise to”
Bucky is quiet as he moves downstairs, leaving Steve to play contently with his Godson. He hopes he finds you soon, and he prays to God you will forgive him for the utter mess he has needlessly created.
"Y/n? Honey? Where are you?”
He checks the living room, the kitchen, the hallways. 
All to find no sign of you.
“Baby I’m getting scared here, if this is to get back at me then I’m sorry! I’m dying out here-”
He halts.
A single sob can be heard from the bathroom. It’s muffled but it means you’re here and you’re alive. Bucky has never felt so relieved.
“Y/N, doll please- are you alone in there? Babydoll please, let me apologise”
You take a few moments to compose yourself, and open the door. Bucky has never seen you look so small, with tear tracks dried down your cheeks from red puffy eyes.
But it’s what you say next that truly makes his heart feel like it’s been plunged into an icy cold river.
“I think it’s best you leave, James.”
------------
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