#MDD Records

[doomedandstoned]

PATRIARCHS IN BLACK Capture Lightning in a Bottle with ‘My Veneration’

~Review by Tom Hanno~

Today, PATRIARCHS IN BLACK releases their sophomore album, 'My Veneration' (2023), via MDD Records. For those of you who don't remember, Patriarchs In Black is the project spearheaded by guitarist Dan Lorenzo (Hades, Non-Fiction, Vessel of Light, Cassius King) and drummer Johnny Kelly (Type O Negative, Danzig, A Pale Horse Named Death, Kill Devil Hill, etc).

The band recruited a phenomenal roster of singers, who each do a song and sometimes more than one. For My Veneration they assembled an even more diverse group than they did for their initial outing, Reach For The Scars (review), and we're here to talk about what they accomplished for their return.

"Dead or Dying" by Patriarchs In Black

The album opens up with "Dead Or Dying," a track that features the vocal stylings of Karl Agell (ex-Corrosion Of Conformity) and the bass playing of Dave Neabore. As expected, this song is the perfect way to kick off the album.

I've always loved what Karl does vocally, and he doesn't disappoint here. The music is influenced by the Doom and Stoner genres, and the rhythm section underneath is rock solid. I challenge you to not move for the duration of the song, but I'll tell you now that the power of the groove will make that impossible to achieve.

"Veneration" by Patriarchs In Black

The first single was "Veneration," which features Mark Sunshine (Unida) on vocals, as well as the rhyming of the one and only D.M.C., otherwise known as Darryl McDaniels of hip-hop legends, Run D.M.C. Also featured is Emma Smoler, who contributed some beautiful violin work.

The song itself has touches of Led Zeppelin and Black Sabbath, and a ton of groove; particularly during the sections where D.M.C takes over. The vocals of Mark Sunshine are incredible, as he conjured up a serious Robert Plant vibe, and then mixed it with pieces of the Grunge era. Overall, this track is one of the best on the album.

"Non-Defectum" by Patriarchs In Black

"Non-Defectum" is immediately after "Veneration," and continues the groove factor while also having a bit of a hip hop flow during the verse sections.

Kelly Abe contributed a diverse vocal performance, and it is one of the highlights of this album in my opinion. As always, Dan puts in the perfect guitar parts, while Johnny and Eric J. Morgan (bass) hold everything together by using their talents to full effect.

"Lust For Lies" by Patriarchs In Black

"Lust For Lies" is another track that I gravitated towards, and it features vocalist Rob Traynor and Johnny Araya on bass, and yes, he's the brother of Slayer's Tom Araya.

There is a literal ton of Black Sabbath influence throughout this song, and that is mostly thanks to what Dan does on guitar; he pulls out the perfect blend of Doom Metal and groove. The vocals are fairly diverse, which helps add another layer to this killer tune.

Other standout tracks include "My Veneration," "Crooked Smile," and a cover of Black Sabbath's "Hole In The Sky."

The album is only two days away from release as of this writing, so go to Bandcamp and check out the single of "Veneration" and prepare yourselves for the full album. Enjoy!

My Veneration by Patriarchs In Black

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[thenwothm]

INTERVIEW: FATAL FIRE (GERMANY)

We are joined by Germany’s Fatal Fire for this exclusive interview, where we dive into the background of the band and chat about their debut album, “Arson!” TheNwothm: Hey there Fatal Fire! Can you first of all introduce each band member and where you are from? Tim: Svenja is our vocalist. She thought for almost all her life that she couldn’t sing until she really tried to sing seriously, haha.…

[rockyoushow]

Interview With Germany Classic Metal Warriors WARDRESS

You gotta love stories like this. WARDRESS formed in the early 80’s only to break up before they had a chance to really get started. Decades later guitarist Gor and vocalist Erich reformed and launched a new chapter for the band. It sounds like the script for a Hollywood movie. Not only are they on their second full-length album “Metal ’til the End”, released through Black Sunset/MDD Records, but…

[skinnypaleangryperson]

Some people are living the lesser version of their dreams but they're still living their dreams, some people are as good as dead. I'm the last one.

[byakuyasdarling]

can’t deal with the fact people glorify anxiety,,, like yes the disorder that literally keeps me from normal functioning and is detrimental to my physical and mental health is so cutesy and so easy to live with and I can totally sleep at night and I don’t get massively painful ulcer flare-ups when I’m stressed (it is literally debilitating) panic attacks are quirky! /s

I don’t have repetitive thought cycles that make me constantly worry and exhaust me throughout the day from a whole other disorder that’s exasperated by my anxiety! It’s so pleasant in both of these ways! I love when people think me flapping my hands is so cutesy when it’s totally not a sign of distress for the most part /SARCASM

I have no clue why anyone would want to fake something I am so desperate to get rid of. Like this is not fun — especially when so many people close to me in my life atm have this strong image of me that I hate living up to.

Though I will say that most likely, even people who fake disorders do have something bad going on and is symptomatic of broader issues (there’s literally a term for this, I forgot) — so I’m not going to go haywire at confused and hurting children. Though their actions are ignorant and can romanticise what living with these things is actually like and diminish other people’s struggles — I’m fairly sure they’re too young and confused to properly process that and I doubt it’s malicious the majority of the time. You’re just going to further push them into boxes by harassing them.

[oceanlipgloss]

DREAM GIRL

MAMMON.

+ warnings: implicit suggestive themes.

+ my mc is the heroine, so the pronouns are feminine.

She was his dream girl.

Everything about her seemed to be synthesised from the thread of his dreams: her voice, her face, her body, the way she looked him, even the way she teased him and made fun of his little antics and endless troublemaking.

Old love. That was his love for treasures and the expensive things in life. When he cherished her more than everything else, though, could his feelings for the material parts really be called the greatest ‘love’ of all?

There was no need to wonder. It was so obvious, the answer: ‘no.’

He loved gold, but the threads that wove her organs and spirit together, they weren’t golden at all. They were all sorts of rare colours—a jewelled relic—because that’s just what she was: irreplaceable, rare, unforetold.

He could never meet anyone else like her in this mystic world. He would never find anyone like her again. So for once, he was so lucky. He had won the best lottery. Luck had glazed his stars.

She was the one. She was his one, his beloved.

...wait a minute. ‘Beloved’ sounds hella old-school and sappy for someone modern and stylish like him, doesn’t it? Almost like something a certain ancient, proud tyrant would say.

Damn it. Never had he imagined there would come a day in which currency and riches confronted their rivals in his heart, their rankings at stake, but here he so happily was. His credit card should just come to terms with the fact that this stunning woman was now his number one darlin’, then.

“’S not that I like ya or anything,” he had still told her once and again in the past, repeating himself over and over like a parrot, stuck on the dumb lyric like a broken record, until saying something so atrocious and false became impossible.

No one could believe such a lie, even if they had ever tried to or wanted to.

Because everyone knew.

They all knew how he would die for her if need be. They all knew that what lit his heart wasn’t simple attraction, or mere infatuation, or a sweet temporary crush.

It was a lifelong love.

He was madly, hopelessly in love with her.

She knew that, too.

His heart was on display for all of them to see. They could see it glowing inside him. They could see it burning in the dark.

She saw it, too.

Really, he adored each aspect of her. How was it possible that his Father had made someone so perfect for him?

Well, maybe not specifically for him, but still. What was his Father thinking? Hell, was He even thinking at all? Hadn’t He known that this particular wild child of his would fall head over heels in love with her like a maniac overdosed on romance?

It was surreal, how right she was for him. It was dreamlike, how sweet they were together. What did they call people like them in the human world again? Other half, twin flame, soulmate?

Each of her lashes, her big eyes, her glossy lips, her soft hair, her smooth skin, her delicate hands, her—well, everything. Every inch, every melody, every word.

Often he finds himself thinking about her voice when she talks to him, her gaze when she watches him, her lips when they meet his, and...

...other things, other things.

Crazy. Oh, he’s crazy about her.

He was a fallen angel, a devil, a traitor, but he thought that he would worship her. He could. He did. He had tender faith in her heart, in her mind, in her very soul.

She was, after all, his dream girl.

+notes: a rare easter egg spur-of-the-moment fic. There’s a scene in the first game in which Mammon says that he loves everything about MC or did I hallucinate it? and I just remembered it and immediately thought, ‘the sweetheart of his dreams, the one made for him in every way.’ Also, this is approximately 50% word-vomit. My brain took time to throw it up, and I glossed it—albeit lightly—as well, so I’m not going to label it 100% alphabet puke, no. But I’ve been so uninspired, man. Writer’s block and whatnot MDD OCD GAD stress hehe. Even on the few occasions when I do get sparks of sentences and write them down, it’s radio silence next, and I end up abandoning the WIP for a time. Actually, there are WIPs I’ve buried likely for forever now, and that’s pretty unusual for me, since whenever I start a piece I often finish it (even if that’s months later) and put it up despite how it may not be of the quality my perfectionism and standards demand. Because I mean, meh, why the heck not? It’s already there, isn’t it? And I already poured in the time, thought and mental strain to do it, didn’t I? So I’ll merely tape it on my blog and AO3 page either as is au naturel or polish it as per I deem necessary. Anyways, I turned my notes into a rant of sorts there, but that’s really the point and what I actually had in mind for this section of my fics when it’s present: jot down inspiration particular to the fic in question, babble about my experience writing it, stuff it with tiny rants, things like that. If you went ahead and read this exquisite newspaper column, I offer you thanks for helping yourselves to a slice of my annoyance, I suppose? lol And I want to write a Mephi fic so bad aaaah I have a rotting WIP and a few decaying ideas scribbled down, so now I have to debate if I should complete the WIP, choose one of the ideas and make it into a fic, or write something new with the naughty abstract theme my mind is currently craving. Hmm...what to do indeed. Now watch me probably not even try to write a single fic for a long time

+ MASTERLIST

+ AO3 POST

©𝙤𝙘𝙚𝙖𝙣𝙡𝙞𝙥𝙜𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙨

[pixelchills]

Okay so, I've been discussing this thing for the future of 'My dear Daffodil' on my second twitter account for a couple of weeks now, and I'd like to hear all of my readers thoughts on it now :>

Tldr at the end.

MDD = My Dear Daffodil

ANSSW = A Not so Sunny World (both, the main story and the prequel)

So, for the record: MDD was never fully planned the way A Not so Sunny World was. I have constructed the story arcs, dramas, character deaths and relationships way before I even started writing ANSSW. Even though some small changes were made, most of it stayed the same according to my original plan.

However, since MDD is an alternative universe mostly created in the means of humour, domesticity and non-zombie related drama, and especially to include Solar in the universe where he would be loved and given the place to heal, rather than being send to the death row.

So the question I've had hanging around has been mostly about Sun and Solar, and the fact they're going to spend 9 years together before the locations merge. What would you think their relationship will become once Moon joins in and eventually starts dating Sun?

In ANSSW, the couple of encounters Sunrise had with Solar gave Solar a very "forced brotherhood" -vibe, where Solar would insists Sun being his little brother due to the fact Dr Weston was their supervising doctor. Sun always said no, he was not his brother, he had no siblings, and was shown to be very uncomfortable around Solar and his weird fixation on familyhood with someone he had only seen once.

Now, in MDD universe, Sunrise was created to complement Solar's personality, and fix the problems and mistakes Dr Weston had made with Solar. Due to this, Sunrise is technically "made for Solar" just like Solar himself seemed to think about it.

So this is where things get tricky; a seemingly lot of people wish to Solar have a second chance in love. And in this universe, it could work in many ways. But since the story is still mostly focused on Sun's POV, I am interested to hear what do you think could happen in this universe?

The nine years Solar and Sun are gonna spend together will not change no matter which approach I take with their relationship later. Solar is gonna take Sun under his wing a bit too literally and cause the similar "innocence" stay with Sun until the Megaplex arc by babying him and channelling the 'caretaker code' solely towards Sun.

But after Sun and Moon meet again and start their relationship, there is a chance to let Solar join them in a polycule.

Again, this is why I need to know it this early, so I know which way I will write Solar's feelings towards Sun;

Is he gonna take the role as a forced big brother like he seemingly teased Sun in ANSSW, or,

Is he gonna try to protect Sun from love despite thinking Sun was "created for him" and surpressing his own growing feelings for years just because he doesn't want either of them to get hurt?

If the story would go with the latter, Solar would still take some time to join Sun and Moon in a polycule if that's what you're up to. There's a possibility to make them form a throuple, where everyone ia dating everyone, or a simple V polycule where Moon is dating both Solar and Sun but Sun and Solar are not dating each other.

The main reason why I am asking this is because now that I think about it, Sun and Moon dating while Solar just watches them as a third wheel feels a bit cruel, since his own love ended so poorly and literally destroyed him.

So that's why I'd love to hear your opinions this. Which way would you be interested to see the story go?

I do not want to cause confusion, and I originally planned to keep the 'Solar and Sun are brothers' -thing as something that would make Sun feel uncomfortable and forcedbly too close to Solar in Sun's mind, but since MDD is set a bit differently I wouldn't mind taking another approach to their relationship.

But I will not write brothers to lovers sort of thing because that's just a big no. I do not write or draw or support incest or incest ships at all.

So... Your thoughts? Would you want Solar to end up with Sun and Moon (or only with Moon) in a polycule (after he learns to shower again), or should he stay loveless in the means of romantic love?

In any case I'm gonna keep Sun and Solar's relatioship as co-workers and friends instead of the siblinghood in this story, because it was sort of my idea all together after I came up with the 'Sunrise was created to complement Solar' thing.

Sorry for the long ramble, I have a lot of thoughts I need to get out of my head but I do not want to confuse people or make anyone think I support incest, by writing Sun and Solar as brothers and then as lovers. Solar's first thought of Sun was that he was his girlfriend/boyfriend in MDD (and it was supposed to be like that in ANSSW too, but since Solar was sure about his own upcoming death I don't think he would think that Dr Weston created him a partner so...)

Please tell me your opinions, or any sort of discussion in comments, reblogs or to my ask box or DMs.

As I said, MDD was never planned the way ANSSW was, so there's a lot of plotholes and storylines I need to decide on, and I do like to think of them early enough before writing so the story connects and flows from the beginning to the very end somewhat flawlessly :>

TLDR; Should I write Solar as a later lover to Sun and Moon instead of a 'big brother' -figure in MDD?

[sophieinwonderland]

This isn't the point of that post you made but I can't help but need to comment on one part

"Non-disordered means that you're a system but it isn't a disorder, you just are one(which also isn't possible according to the DSM-5, by the way.)"

And once again these are the same people on the side that says pro endogenics are the ones who are anti-recovery

There's a reason I stay so far away from these people. They are the most 'there's no such thing as becoming healthy, that will never happen' I've ever seen and it's so harmful for the exact same people they insist they are doing all this to fight for

You know, I actually find that many anti-endos aren't necessarily arguing that you can't possibly be healthy even if this rhetoric does strongly come off that way. (Although this is r/systemscringe so maybe this one does believe that. There are plenty there who don't believe in healthy multiplicity. )

Instead, I find that they're usually arguing a very, very stupid technicality.

See, a disorder, once diagnosed, is on your records forever. And that's a good thing as a bureaucratic tool. It means a patient can be diagnosed with depression once, recover, and feel secure that their insurance will cover treatment if they relapse 5 years later.

The problem comes in when one starts viewing disorders not as clinical labels to help patients in clinical settings, but as identity labels that define you as a person.

It seems absurd to me to tell someone who was diagnosed with MDD because of a two-week long depressive episode that they recovered from after a month of treatment that they're "disordered" 30 years later despite never having another episode, just because they technically still have a diagnosis on record.

But this is exactly how people are treating DID when they say that someone with DID, even after final fusion, will always have DID.

Even if being anti-recovery isn't the intention here though, I do feel it at least contributes to creating this environment of hopelessness around mental not only DID, but other mental illnesses as well.

[train-wreck-of-thought]

Continue below if you'd rather not read it on Medium.

It's frustrating how many people will stop taking you seriously if you call yourself neurodivergent. It's a genuinely useful term--especially in my case.

I'm a thirty year old man with a long, complicated diagnostic history. If you'll indulge me, I'd like to go over some of it (though if you'd rather take me at my word, feel free to skip down to the last paragraph).

At age six, I was diagnosed with ADHD. Three years later, this diagnosis was affirmed.

A year after that, however, a neuropsychologist disputed this diagnosis. He further shot down my parents' suspicions that I was autistic.

It seems someone--and to this day, it's unclear who--thought otherwise, because a diagnosis of autism somehow found its way into my records. At the age of twenty, a psychological evaluation affirmed this diagnosis. The psychologist further noted that I showed several symptoms of ADHD but thought they could be accounted for by the diagnosis of autism. Finally, she diagnosed me with "major depressive disorder, recurrent, sever with psychotic features."

Seven years later, another psychological evaluation disputed the diagnoses of autism and ADHD, only affirming the diagnosis of MDD (albeit moderate rather than severe and without mention of psychotic features). The evaluation noted attention issues but attributed them to depression and anxiety. The evaluation further noted a level of social discomfort but attributed that to social anxiety disorder rather than autism.

My psychiatrist at the time, meanwhile, suggested I suffered from CPTSD. I called up a trauma therapy practice, and the practitioner I spoke to agreed that there were "multiple complex layers of trauma." I was eventually set up with a trauma therapist in training, and she seemed to think I did indeed suffer from CPTSD.

A year after the second psychological evaluation, I was hospitalized. The diagnosis at discharge was listed as schizophrenia. The diagnosis was a bit bewildering to both me and the councilor-in-training I was seeing, and to be honest, I thought they might've just put that down so they could put me on expensive antipsychotics (and it wouldn't be the first time something like that happened, but that's another story).

Then again, maybe they were onto something, because the psychiatrist I'm currently seeing diagnosed me with schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type. Personally, I think that's a bit extreme--I could see bipolar II with psychotic features, maybe--but I'm not the expert. As if for good measure, she also said I might be autistic after all.

If you can believe it, that's not quite everything--that's just the tidiest I could make it--but the point is that my diagnostic history is a mess. Everything I've been diagnosed with has been disputed--whether explicitly (as with autism and ADHD) or implicitly (as with MDD and schizoaffective disorder being diagnostically exclusive with one another).

I have a feeling people reading this might raise an eyebrow at how much time I've spent on all the conditions I may or may not have, and in a sense, that's the point. I wish we lived in a world where, instead of explaining all that, I could just say I'm neurodivergent, but there are so many people who'd read that word and assume I don't actually a psychiatric condition--and meanwhile, professionals seem to think I have all of them.

[airteacher]

If elements were more lineage based and not stuck 1:1 per parent what element would you hc the air kids as having. (Assuming Pema is a non bending daughter of at least one earthbender)

//Personally, I've always imagined Pemzin's kids as having the potential to be Airbenders (bc of Aang being of Air Nomad decent), Waterbenders (bc of Katara being of Water Tribe decent) and Earthbenders (bc of Pema being of Earth Kingdom decent). If one of Pema's parents were from Fire Nation decent, then I'd include that as well.

But I imagine it not extending past grandparents, because the creators specifically say it's not about bloodlines, but rather a spiritual connection, with each culture providing a different spiritual vantage point. So, while I do believe in some genetics having to do with ethnic grouping, I still think grooming is an important factor. By fostering the Air Nomad side of their heritage, they are more likely to develop into Airbenders than any other element.

With this in mind we know of three canon aspects that attribute to being able to bend: ethnic grouping/cultural upbringing (decides which element you're predisposed to developing), spiritual connection (how likely you'll be a bender), and a physical aspect having to do with blood flow and chi channels in/around the brain (an on-and-off switch basically).

Here's a snippet of an interview Bryke did for avatarspirit.net (the main online community for atla/lok content before tumblr arrived) that supports this. This is from April 2007. I've bolded the text I found most relevant.

RM: Okay, next I know I'm going really left brained and you can call me a geek because I am, but in "The Fortuneteller" you have a pair of twins...kids...one is an earthbender and one isn't. So is bending genetic, or is it some sort of spiritual thing? How does it work? BK: Mike and I just got new puppies. They're brothers. They have the same mother and father. Same litter. Mike's dog can just sit in a crate and be happy as a clam. My dog just loses all control...everything. Who knows why these things happen? They're beyond our full understanding. MDD: Yeah, Katara's mom and dad weren't benders. Maybe it's a recessive gene. I've always seen it as more spiritual connections, though. A little bit mysterious... BK: I mean we've definitely talked about it. I think, again, sometimes we might not know...it's more of what we don't want it to be. We didn't want it to be like there is a lineage...a royal family or something...and these people can bend and then there's everyone else as non-bending, people who never will. Some sort of caste system. Mike and I are more attracted to more of the flux type universe. The only constant is change, variation, that sorta thing. I'm sure it's a bunch of factors. ***Interviewers note: About 20 mins after the interview, Bryan came back to me and we spoke a little more about the basis of bending off recorder. He described bending as more of a talent. You have some genetic basis for potential, but you could go your whole life without developing the talent into ability. Some people have more inherent talent than others, while others with minimal inherent talent can still develop it through hard work and practice. He reiterated a connection to the spiritual energies is the underlying basis. How it manifests is based on upbringing and experience. RM: So could Teo's people perhaps grow into the airbenders of the future? BK: I think Teo's people are more refugees. They probably came together because they're not benders and really had no way to defend themselves. Then fell under this nutty guy who has his own skill and aura of authority. I don't think it's an ethnic group of non-benders, rather they were all just escaping the disasters of war. MDD: Yeah, I think if you've gone through puberty and not found any bending abilities, you're probably not going to find them. I think it manifests early. BK: Although that would make a pretty outrageous story. Some 80 year old guy... MDD: "Wow, I never knew!" BK: ...fire starts shooting out... RM: I was just curious if the airbenders could just come back from the general population rather than necessarily having to come back through Aang or anyone else who came from the airbending lineage. MDD: Aang is the last Airbender, so I don't think it's possible for Airbending to spontaneously develop in the general population. RM: It seems like all the Air Nomads were benders. Did they exile everyone who didn't manifest the trait, or did they really have such a high percentage of born benders? BK: We always have liked the idea of who will be a bender and who won't be to be kind of an ambiguous mystery, even to the people in the Avatar world. From early on we thought the Air Nomads would be all benders. Again it's like Mike was saying, it's more of a spiritual connection. But they have...they had...the smallest population. Earth Kingdom has the biggest population but the smallest percentage of benders. So yeah, there were these notions we kicked around that is wasn't going to be regimented or ruled through specific lineages. We liked the idea that each of the cultures have a different spiritual vantage point...coming at it from a different angle. MDD: Then the Air Nomads would have been the most spiritual...the most connected to the spiritual energy of the Earth. BK: But the most detached from society. More monastic.

[catholickedd]

rant about depression and self harm under the cut - do not read if either if those is a trigger for you

the most disgusting thing about having been severely depressed, undiagnosed and untreated, for years of my life?

i thought i wasn’t doing depression “right.”

i never self harmed. pressed knives to my skin, but never drew blood.

so i wasn’t depressed enough to deserve help.

what the fuck?

and my father had the same idea. i wasn’t depressed, i just wasn’t trying hard enough.

so he left me in this eternal state of wanting so badly not to exist anymore, barely being able to pull myself out of bed in the morning, hating myself more than i’ve ever hated anyone else,

because no blood fell from my skin of my own doing.

and that is fucked up.

if people say they need help, they need help. they don’t need to reach a specific standard before they need help.

people can be severely depressed and never self-harm.

MDD is on my record now. the psychologist, an older man who still used the term “aspie,” described it as mild to moderate.

my symptoms were textbook for severe major depressive disorder.

a lack of self harm is a show of self-control, not a missed requirement for a diagnosis.

mental health doesn’t always check all your precious boxes.

[metalcultbrigade]

Esta es el épico artwork para el nuevo disco de los españoles "VHÄLDEMAR" titulado como “Sanctuary Of Death”, siendo este el séptimo larga duración en su recomendada discografía, será estrenado el 09 de mayo del 2024 a través del sello MDD Records con 11 tracks.

PRE-ORDENA DESDE YA EN:

https://mdd-shop.de/VHAELDEMAR-Sanctuary-Of-Death-CD/SW10108

"11 temas nuevos que deberían hacer latir más rápido el corazón de todo fanático del Heavy Melódico y del Power Metal! El quinteto lleva en alto la tradicional bandera del metal desde finales de los 90 y está inspirando a un creciente número de seguidores fuera de España con sus pegadizas melodías y auténticos himnos. Al igual que sus predecesores, el álbum fue grabado y producido en Chromaticity Studios por el guitarrista y productor Pedro J.Monge y el arte también se basa en la tradición y una vez más pudo hacerlo Darkgrove, quien también creó el arte para Manowar, Testament, Battle. Bestia y otros creados, ganan. ¡“Sanctuary Of Death” es sin duda uno de los momentos más destacados del heavy/power metal del año!"

PRIMER SENCILLO RECIÉN ESTRENADO:

https://youtu.be/OeI3GH8j9Mw

TRACKLIST:

1. Devil's Child

2. Dreambreaker

3. Deathwalker

4. Sanctuary of Death

5. Forevermore

6. Heavy Metal

7. Old King's Visions (Part VII)

8. Journey to the Unknown

9. Brothers

10. The Rebel's Law

11. The Last Flame

SOCIAL MEDIA:

• VhäldemarOficial

• IG: @vhaldemaroficial

• http://www.vhaldemar.net/

• https://twitter.com/InfoVhaldemar

• http://www.youtube.com/user/VhaldemarOficial

#spainpower #heavypower #vhaldemar #powermetal00 #newalbums2024

[vtforpedro]

update- TWs in tags

Thank you all very much for your replies to my last post. I’ve had zero energy this past week and yesterday was a very hard day. Got my decision in the mail and wow, they sure are long. It’s not good, folks!!! Not good at all. This guy is an SSA shill and I’m flabbergasted. Hopefully my attorney gets back to me next week asap because not only do I have grounds for an appeal, I believe I’ve been denied my rights by law. Some highlights from his decision. They’re very painful to read and my case manager way back in November of 2021 said that they love to tell people they’re disabled but here’s why you can work. Basically what this dude did but I’m seriously confused and angry. I think it also speaks to the type of person and biases he has. -I meet the disability insurance thing, as in he considers my record to start back in October 2015, which is how my attorney laid it out. And it’s true because that’s the last time I was able to work. -I am severely limited and cannot perform the work I once did. The work I once did was, uh, retail/customer service, and a ‘stay at home’ job if you will by being a caregiver to a veteran (my ex). -My disabilities as the SSA listed them: chiari malformation, leukemia, major depressive disorder recurrent, severe, PTSD w/dissociative affects, headache, s1 radiculopathy (nerve damage), and idiopathic intracranial hypertension (IIH, my number one enemy) -Chiari and leukemia aren’t considered disabilities, which I knew they wouldn’t be. I’m in remission and people often work with debilitating cancers even tho they should absolutely not have to. Let’s begin with what he got wrong lol -He dates that I got an EMG done in March of 2022 before the lumbar puncture. I did not get an EMG until September of 2022. The LP was in April of 2022. -Nerve damage. I have zero evidence of nerve damage in my medical record, according to him. Zero. I do not have a single symptom to suggest nerve damage and I need at least one from both ‘categories’ the SSA lists. But I have none. I was bedbound for eight months because of nerve damage. I had noted swelling (with pictures) of my paraspinal muscles which might have contributed. I had an EMG because of nerve pain. My dr ordered an EMG because of nerve pain. Shooting pain down my leg and numbness/tingling. Also the severe pain in my lower back causing me to not be able to sit up or walk without excruciating pain 💀 I was referred by my neuro to a pain specialist who really wanted to do steroid shots in my lumbar region FOR NERVE PAIN. I was in physical therapy for months to relearn how to like walk and sit up but also for NERVE PAIN. Legit have no words. It’s noted in my neuro’s and his PA’s file about the radiculopathy explaining what happened to me finally. Hhhhhh. -MDD/PTSD/suicidal ideation. I have extensive medical records going back to 2015--NPs, therapists, my psychiatrist, and the neuro psych eval I had in Sept of 2021 + more since. The eval is one of my most important medical documents. He said the medical evidence did not support major depression/anxiety/PTSD for 2+ years with no improvement, which is not factual. My medical records from my NP in 2015-2017 show how many medications I was on that did not work. How long I was in therapy because it did not work. My current psychiatrist is on my side and tells me every time I see him that I’ve been on everything and we’re limited lol I believe this summer I will be with him for two years alone. The judge notes I have no medical evidence of panic attacks despite them being listed in my medical record. At most of these places. Again. Plus the ER at the very beginning discuss panic attacks. This man read my neuro psych eval where she diagnosed me with those MH disorders (beyond already being diagnosed elsewhere). This is an intimately personal document because it details a SA that occurred in 2012 plus the abuse my ex put me through for 2yrs, which made me unable to work starting in 2015. She noted high concern for my well being as my suicidal ideation is, uh, high lmao and the effects of PTSD from multiple traumatic things. He said there is no evidence in my medical record beyond a depressive and anxious mood which do not fit the bill for MH disabilities. He completely ignored the neuro psych eval (and everything else) so I think that speaks volumes of the type of person he is. -IIH. This is where I get very angry. He lists it as something I was diagnosed with and it was in consideration, yet he completely fails to consider it. He considered ‘headaches’. Not IIH, not multi-feature chronic migraines that are well documented, not the recommended brain shunt by my neurosurgeon if pressure was high, which it was. He is, by SSA law, supposed to argue for/against the conditions listed. He didn’t. -Allegations. He says that the “allegations” I have made don’t completely match my medical records by, like, existing or severity. Except the things that he says I alleged but are not supported are because of IIH. Which he had plenty of medical evidence of + the burden of deciding I meet criteria for disability is on the SSA at this point. He has to by law complete my medical record himself once it goes to him (almost a year ago) so he has the entire picture to make an accurate and fair judgment. He says I allege symptoms not endorsed by medical record but they are symptoms of IIH lmao -He implies I lied (”allegations”). He said that in my records it has been noted I stopped driving once all this happened (dec 2019) and have not driven since. It is noted *everywhere*. But he says that I indicated I drove one (1) time in December 2021. Obviously, this is not true and I have no idea where he got this from. My mom was pissed because she has driven me everywhere for 3+ yrs lmao I have a feeling someone misheard me say dec 2019 for dec 2021, so the judge thinks this makes me a liar. He completely ignored the vocational expert’s testimony in the opposite way I have read happens--narrowing me down to 1 job, then 0, but deciding himself I could perform jobs like ‘mail clerk, router, or marker’ whatever the fuck those last two are. A dr who reviewed my case (I didn’t even know they did lkafaja) said I could only have occasional interactions with people. The judge said that he felt that was not true and increased it to frequent. I don’t trust people. At all. I never want to make friends irl again because it feels way too fucking vulnerable. This is in my medical records. Anyway. I truly believe I have grounds for an appeal b/c of mistakes he made and I hope my attorney agrees with that. The judge is not supposed to fuck up dates or ignore medical evidence entirely in his judgment. BY LAW. Angry, hurt, tired. Why does this keep happening to me lol why can one thing not go right but instead everything always gets worse. I feel like I try to put good out into the world when I can but it spits on me in return. I want to give up.

[metalshockfinland]

BOSPARANS FALL Release "Live at Aaargh Festival 2024" CD + Live Video 'Alrik Immerda'

Southern German RPG melodic death metallers BOSPARANS FALL, who caused a stir last year with their debut album “Götterspiel: Dunkle Zeiten”, have recorded their show at this year’s Aaargh Festival. The result is the live album “Live at Aaargh Festival 2024”, which was released yesterday, December 20th on all download and streaming platforms, as well as on CD from the band and MDD. To mark the…

[anthem-for-orion]

I don't know what I have, and at this point I know better than to go wandering into a psych office again to find out.

Official diagnoses are major depressive disorder and general anxiety. Diagnosed with psychotic depression during a trip to the psych ward in college: auditory hallucinations for a few days prior to getting committed, advanced to commands - which, for the record, I was not following.

Symptoms consistent with MDD, being episodes lasting between days to months of depressed mood, lowered energy, physical and mental fatigue, episodes going back to age 11 as far as I can remember. I distinctly remember having a period of about a month in 5th grade where I couldn't stop thinking about how I could feasibly kill myself. General anxiety symptoms have been improving in the past few years: historically, it has been panic attacks during stressful situations and dread to the point of impacting executive functions. Exogenous testosterone and cognitive behavioral therapy have helped with anxiety but not depression.

Symptoms inconsistent with my existing diagnoses and which I should probably find a therapist for but which I will absolutely not, at least not while I am in a position to be easily coerced into treatment that would negatively impact me:

Olfactory and tactile hallucinations on a regular basis (at least once a week, more if generally stressed or tired). Auditory and visual hallucinations when stressed (observation voices, not command).

Loss of affect, can generally fake it for brief periods, but I've been called out for "looking like a psychopath, got those, like, dead shark eyes."

Bouts of... low level aphasia? True aphasia is more intense than what I experience, but if sometimes feels as though I can't get words lined up in the correct order. For example, I was speaking with a coworker the other day about where I could find the stock of a particular size of autoclavable biohazard bags, as we had run out. It came out as something akin to "Bags-ss the orange ones? Do you know any more somewhere?" It's embarrassing. I can speak quite fine most of the time, but sometimes my speech processing just gets clogged, I suppose.

Variable levels of derealization. I spend more of my time in a haze than I do in reality these days. This one I have discussed with a therapist regularly in college, so I feel decently sure this is the correct term. I've followed her advice about 54321 grounding and such, and while it helps during intense bouts, I can't do it constantly for months straight.

Sometimes I can't feel my legs. At its worst, I can't move them either, which becomes rather inconvenient. They get dead frigid too, which makes me concerned that this is a physical problem with my blood flow. 18% body fat 5'8" 140 pounds, normal blood pressure, cholesterol managed via lipitor. I'm not sure what's up with that, but it does happen more often during depressive episodes.

Maybe I am somewhere on the schizophrenic spectrum. The therapist in college wanted me tested, but I fell off with regular appointments during summer break. They put me on an SSRI (escitalopram, trintellix) and started trying different antipsychotics (invega, risperidone, paliperidone once). Trintellix *kind of* worked; it got rid of the fatigue but did nothing for my actual mood or any other symptoms. The antipsychotics cooled down the rate of hallucinations but shredded my mood and affect entirely, and I gained about 30 pounds. This is most of why I don't want to go back. My creativity and those few flashes of good mood are the only things I'm living for and proud of right now. I cannot lose them.

My brother thinks I'm just autistic and that I need to "stop trying to mask." His idea of "not masking" is continuing to exist as an anxious mess in his childhood room while using his neurodivergency as an excuse to never attempt to improve himself. He is diagnosed: he also has other, curable issues that he has been convinced are unfixable. Maybe I am autistic: that doesn't mean I don't have other things I need to pay attention to. Still, I feel annoyed with him for trying to brush me off in the way he's brushed himself off, and I fear it wells up sometimes with autistic people who aren't my brother excuse their own behavior as "whoopsies, my autism is showing." If that is who I'll be grouped with if I do get a positive autism diagnosis from a professional, I don't want one.

[yoacusomultimediosblog]

121 MDD

¡Cifra récord para una pintura de René Magritte A René Magritte painting depicting an eerily lit streetscape sold for more than $121 million at a Christie’s auction in New York on Tuesday –– surpassing its $95 million estimate and smashing the auction record for the Surrealist artist’s work. https://cnn.it/4fBBXC2