#Let them all be deported.
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
cyarskaren52 · 22 hours ago
Text
It was so wild to me watching Latinos at those rallies saying they had family members who were here illegally and that they would be fine with them being deported.
Latinos went on TV & declared yes deport my family.
WTF are black people supposed to do to fix that?
answer : Not a damn thing. They’re gonna have to learn on their own. You’d think seeing Latino babies put in cages would’ve been enough but here we are.
Tumblr media
0 notes
cometrose · 8 days ago
Text
like the thing is people are dying from abortion bans and dying from FDA deregulation and everyone just looks at each other and goes “hmm my gas prices are too high”
132 notes · View notes
jomnki · 3 months ago
Text
time is a flat circle where we watch a country go to another country and randomly will civilians because "what if they're the enemies haha we totally aren't clearing people out to steal their land" etc and we all go "wow thats fucking messed up, good thing it won't happen again!" and then the exact same thing happens right now and the same people somehow are just incapable of accepting that fact that we are living through history and letting the thing we said wont happen again fucking happen again.
#the same ideologies causing all the pain back then are still causing pain now.#you need to realise any retaliation no matter the initial cause that causes mass civilian death is historically regarded as a bad thing#maybe some natives attack the white people coming into their land? yeah lets genocide them.#vietnamese conflict that america barges in on because it has a huge fucking head about itself?#lets kill all the vietnamese villagers we see because anyone could be the enemy.#oh and if they fight back because theyre enraged about the destruction of their home and murder of their families? proof that we were right.#we should bomb them and kill them and gas them. all for anti communism!#their fault for fighting back!#extremists drive two planes into a building? well we just gotta go can start fucking shooting every arab civilian we see and start a war.#because its obviously their fucking fault.#oh and yeah lets drop a nuclear bomb on japan because theyre not surrendering fast enough. on all those civilians.#oh can the car bombings in northern ireland and stuff? yeah lets just go to a stadium full of people that just wanted to watch football-#-and start shooting.#<--actions that have been repeatedly performed forever and ever#<--and all of them only go down well with insane people who think deporting all immigrants or mandatory school gennital checks a good thing#warfare is fucking stupid and so is colonization. you have too little faith in the common person and too much in power hungry governments#dROOLING AT OIL. VIBRATING AND ROCK HARD FOR THAT SWEET FOREIGN OIL AND LAND. COMPANIES GIDDY WITH THE PROSPECT OF KILLING NATIVES.
3 notes · View notes
utvarpcity · 1 year ago
Text
today the swedish security service announced that the terrorism threat level has been raised to a 4 (on a scale 1-5). many extremist organisations (including the likes of al-qaida) have encouraged their followers to “strike back” against sweden. because of this many countries have updated their travel advice regarding sweden, for example the uk goverment’s website reads “Terrorists are very likely to try and carry out attacks in Sweden”. it’s fucking terrifying rn and it’s all because of this one madman coming here and organising public burnings of copies of the quran which happened over a year ago but we’re suffering the effects of now. never mind that the guy was danish and that the counter demonstrations were much larger than the small number of right-wing extremists attending the burnings, terrorist organisations have now painted sweden as their number one target and our useless fucking government can’t do shit (and lots of us are saying that this is what happens when you decide to cooperate with right-wing xenophobic parties and legitimising their views but whatever). as always there’s still idiots out there who want to literally add fuel to the fire and carry out more burnings and being allowed to do so because of freedom of speech or whatever (i mean, it’s an important thing but if your actions jeopardise the safety of the entire country and its citizens…) and i’m so fucking tired of a small number of idiots making all the rest of us suffer. this situation is unlike any i’ve experienced in my life and it’s making me scared to go to public places or attend events (i mean our football team just cancelled their plans to hold a celebratory public event should they win the bronze because of the risk of terrorism… that means it’s serious)
2 notes · View notes
bbloggmaym3 · 1 year ago
Text
"You know how cops were invented to protect private property?"
yeah because when someone calls police over fighting, murder or rape it's secretly about ~private property~
Jedi as serial scammers though. Every mission includes a sidequest to sabacc table for extra cash. Padawans on their first outing be like ‘but I thought the senate was funding this mission’ yes little one but they will ride our arses for every cent so let’s go fleece some rich asshole. He won’t even notice. You know how cops were invented to protect private property? Well jedi are here to protect your everything except your private property. *force tricks an atm into printing free money* that, my very young padawan, is something we call a victimless crime.
13K notes · View notes
pallegina · 4 months ago
Text
seeing ppl talk about erewhon is so disgusting like ew 🤢 glad it blew up after I quit I don't even want to imagine the hellscape those prices are now
0 notes
malcriada · 3 months ago
Text
Help save Bilal's family!
i want to talk about my friend Bilal @bilal-salah0. for over a year now, Bilal has been living in germany, trying to adjust to his new living situation in a foreign country, learning a new language and working full time. 
when the war started, he was far away from home and his family and has been living in daily fear for their lives ever since. 
being forced to work long hours and promoting his family’s fundraiser at the same time, he has taken on more responsibility than anyone ever should. still, he managed to raise money for their evacuation fund and helped take care of his family’s daily needs with the money he was making while working. 
in a cruel twist of fate, all of this got taken away in an instant. he lost his job and his apartment and even his residence permit. which means he is at danger of deportation from germany that could happen as soon as next week!
i have been in daily contact with Bilal for a while now and connected him with some of my friends in germany. together, we are trying our utmost to make sure he can stay in the country. anyone who knows german bureaucracy knows what kind of hell it is. but we won't give up.
without his job, he was forced to dip into the money of his family’s evacuation fund to cover their daily expenses like food and shelter. this meant he had to raise his goal from €70,000 to €100,000. this was not an easy decision for him to make, he even asked for my advice on whether or not to do it, because he did not want anyone to think he was scamming people. 
even in such a desperate situation, Bilal does not want to be seen as someone who would ever take advantage of people's generosity
his family is comprised of 18 members, 10 of them are adults and 8 are children under 16 years old, some of them newborns who were born amidst the chaos of war and displacement.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
currently, he is sitting at:
€71,817 / €100,000
donations have been slowing down ever since he reached his original goal. i cannot stress how important it is that they pick back up!
WE ARE RUNNING OUT OF TIME! HE NEEDS TO REACH HIS GOAL BY AUGUST 15TH!
THAT MEANS HE HAS TO RAISE NEARLY 30K IN THE NEXT TEN DAYS. THIS CANT WAIT.
his campaign has been verified and can be found on @/el-shab-hussein’s and @/nabulsi’s list of vetted fundraisers here (#132, line 136) so PLEASE don't hesitate to share and donate.
With such a tight deadline, i cant do this on my own. So i implore you to PLEASE share this wherever you can– on your whatsapp groups, on your discord servers, please share his story on other platforms wherever you have reach! Please share his story wherever you can, so that we can ease this burden from his shoulders.
[ID: a gfm link with a picture of two small children sitting in the sand in front of a cooking pot. they are looking up a the camera, eyes half-closed. the title reads "Donate to Help Evacuate My Family from Gaza to Safety, organized by Bilal salah" End ID]
tagging for reach under the cut, please let me know if you'd like to be removed:
@meaganfoster @briarhips @dirhwangdaseul @mahoushojoe
@schoolhater @pcktknife @sawasawako
@feluka @terroristiraqis @irhabiya @commissions4aid-international @wellwaterhysteria
@deepspaceboytoy @post-brahminism @khanger @kibumkim @neechees
@mangocheesecakes @kyra45-helping-others @7bitter @tortiefrancis
@toiletpotato @fromjannah @vague-humanoid @criptochecca
@aristotels @komsomolka @xinakwans @heritageposts @nibeul
@ot3 @amygdalae @ankle-beez @communistchilchuck @dykesbat
@watermotif @stuckinapril @mavigator @lacecap @yugiohz
@socalgal @chilewithcarnage @ghelgheli @sayruq @northgazaupdates2
@vakarians-babe @wayneradiotv
@psychotic-gerard @mavigator @communistkenobi @socalgal @chilewithcarnage
@ghelgheli @determinate-negation @papasmoke @omegaversereloaded
@xinakwans @givemearmstopraywith @loombreaking @killy @deathlonging
@palms-upturned @blackpearlblast @littlegermanboy @loveaankilaq @sar-soor
@fridgebride @27-moons @tamarrud @familyabolisher @fleshdyk3
@decolonize-solidarity @palipunk @gothhabiba
8K notes · View notes
kvtnisseverdeen · 1 year ago
Text
after 9/11, my mom had her hijab ripped off her head. muslim-american communities were shattered due to the american government suspecting every muslim in america of terrorism and subjecting them to interviews and even deportation. i was in school afraid to embrace my religion because islam was being equated to terrorism. i was bullied for being a muslim and constantly called a terrorist. and let's not forget the millions of muslims that were killed and displaced because of the war on terror. MILLIONS.
it took years for muslims to feel "normal" again. of course, we still felt the uncomfortable stares and the subtle islamophobia. but it was so subtle. we almost forgot it was there.
and now, we're back to straight-forward, blatant islamophobia:
a 6-year-old muslim palestinian boy was stabbed 26 times
rashida tlaib is being censured and her colleague openly said 'all of them’ when a democrat asked how many dead palestinians will be enough?
van jones said to take a stand against muslims at a pro-israel rally
there were 1,283 reports of anti-arab and anti-muslim bias since oct 7 which is a 216% percent increase from last year
pro palestinian protestors are being called terrorists and terrorist-supporters
celebrities like amy schumer, brett gelman, karlie kloss, noah schnapp + more are spreading lies and propoganda against muslims
this is why its so frustrating to me when celebs like noah schnapp and amy schumer are sitting in there million dollar penthouses saying they're "scared." no, you have nothing to be afraid of. the world governments are clearly standing with YOU and protecting YOU. muslim women wearing a hijab are scared. muslim mothers and fathers are scared. muslims that can't openly practice their faith are scared.
muslims have been suffering in their own countries AND in america. we've always been afraid. how can we not when a muslim child was stabbed 26 times, simply because he was muslim? how can we not when people are asking to take a stand against muslims? how can we not when a genocide is happening and no one is doing anything to stop it?
8K notes · View notes
contemplatingoutlander · 18 days ago
Text
It has fallen to me, the humor columnist, to endorse Harris for president
Isn’t this what a newspaper is supposed to do?
Tumblr media
I love that The Washington Post satirist Alexandra Petri took it upon herself to endorse Harris for her paper after Bezos pulled the plug on the editorial board doing so. This is a gift🎁link, so feel free to read the entire article. Below are some excerpts:
The Washington Post is not bothering to endorse a candidate in the 2024 presidential election. (Jeff Bezos, the founder of Blue Origin and the founder and executive chairman of Amazon and Amazon Web Services, also owns The Post.) We as a newspaper suddenly remembered, less than two weeks before the election, that we had a robust tradition 50 years ago of not telling anyone what to do with their vote for president. It is time we got back to those “roots,” I’m told! Roots are important, of course. As recently as the 1970s, The Post did not endorse a candidate for president. As recently as centuries ago, there was no Post and the country had a king! [...] But if I were the paper, I would be a little embarrassed that it has fallen to me, the humor columnist, to make our presidential endorsement. I will spare you the suspense: I am endorsing Kamala Harris for president, because I like elections and want to keep having them. Let me tell you something. I am having a baby (It’s a boy!), and he is expected on Jan. 6, 2025 (It’s a … Proud Boy?). This is either slightly funny or not at all funny.  [...] Well, that world [the baby will be born into] will look very different, depending on the outcome of November’s election, and I care which world my kid gets born into. I also live here myself. And I happen to care about the people who are already here, in this world. Come to think of it, I have a lot of reasons for caring how the election goes. I think it should be obvious that this is not an election for sitting out. The case for Donald Trump is “I erroneously think the economy used to be better? I know that he has made many ominous-sounding threats about mass deportations, going after his political enemies, shutting down the speech of those who disagree with him (especially media outlets), and that he wants to make things worse for almost every category of person — people with wombs, immigrants, transgender people, journalists, protesters, people of color — but … maybe he’ll forget.” “But maybe he’ll forget” is not enough to hang a country on! [...] I’m just a humor columnist. I only know what’s happening because our actual journalists are out there reporting, knowing that their editors have their backs, that there’s no one too powerful to report on, that we would never pull a punch out of fear. That’s what our readers deserve and expect: that we are saying what we really think, reporting what we really see; that if we think Trump should not return to the White House and Harris would make a fine president, we’re going to be able to say so. That’s why I, the humor columnist, am endorsing Kamala Harris by myself! [color/ emphasis added]
How far The Washington Post has fallen into the "darkness" it used to work so hard to ward off to help keep our democracy alive.
[edited]
688 notes · View notes
fiercynn · 8 months ago
Text
oh my fucking god can people stop coopting the term "harm reduction". i know language can change but i refuse to let this term change into the literal opposite meaning just so people can justify their decision to vote for a genocidaire.
harm reduction is literally, meaningfully, about reducing existing risk of harm. a person who uses drugs is at risk of disease or illness because they only have access to dirty needles? provide them with a needle exchange program to make it safer for them. a teen who is sexually active is at risk of becoming pregnant or contracting a sexually transmitted infection? provide them with sex ed and protective devices like condoms or dental dams to allow them to have safe sex.
and yes, there is a part of harm reduction that is aimed at not moralizing about the behavior that you're trying to reduce harm from. but if you're a progressive - as most of the people lecturing us about "harm reduction" purport to be - you should already understand that these behaviors are not ethically bad in and of themselves. it is not inherently unethical to use drugs or be sexually active as a teen, so the fact that harm reduction efforts could "encourage" that behavior is also not unethical! if you think that it is, then you're actually a conservative!
and, importantly, the people who benefit from harm reduction were only at risk of harming themselves in the first place. so helping someone make those activities safer for themselves is not only reducing the risk of harm to that person, but, in doing so, it is not increasing the risk of harm to anyone else either.
voting is giving your active support to a candidate, and thus to that candidate's platform. so please tell me how giving your vote to a president who is actively driving a genocide, perpetuating a pandemic, funding cop cities and a border wall, and driving up deportations - none of which he has pledged to stop if reelected - is reducing existing risk of harm? because harm reduction also isn't "choosing an option that you believe is better than the hypothetical even worse alternative". and voting for biden is, in fact, increasing the existing risk of the harm that he is currently enacting on other people, and encouraging his despicable behavior!
if coopting the term "harm reduction" is the only thing making you feel okay about your decision to vote for biden despite all the people who are dead, disabled, deported, or destitute because of him, then honestly, that seems like a you problem. STOP COOPTING THE TERM.
(and if you feel the urge to respond with something along the lines of "but biden's just doing his best! i'm just telling people to vote for him because i'm scared of trump!" then please at least read this post as well before you say anything to me about it)
994 notes · View notes
smitethestate · 2 days ago
Text
So in terms of what we need to look out for first with the new Trump presidency, I think the first threat to a huge number of people is going to be mass deportation efforts.
One thing to consider about Trump and Project 2025 is that Trump's first priorities will be himself, his money, his power, and his ego. He doesn't care about anyone or anything but himself. He doesn't care about Project 2025. So what comes first will be about his image and what the people who can bribe him the most want.
Immigration is a huge thing with him, tied up in his ego and his racism. All immigrants, even those who have gained US citizenship, are at risk.
If you are an immigrant or have loved ones who are, look up organizations like the Immigrant Defense Project. Find immigrant defense lawyers in your area. Know your rights and which of them will be stripped when he invokes the Alien Enemies Act on 1798. The ACLU and other human rights orgs will be fighting him every step of the way, but prepare for anything. He will be giving ICE a lot more power. He says he won't tag in the military for this but don't believe a word he says, ever.
For the rest of us, if you're looking to help, you can join or revive local groups that work to alert people to ICE arrests and move to intervene. Forming crowds around arrest vehicles has worked many times to stop arrests from happening. That rules.
If you can't or don't want to join an org, get in touch with your immigrant neighbors, coworkers, etc. Start chatting with them, let them know you want them to stay and you're available to help. We must be in community with our migrant neighbors to effectively help them.
Start thinking about what you're willing to do. All the way to do you have an attic or other hidden space in your home where you can hide people? Are you willing and prepared to be arrested? Defying the government puts you at risk of imprisonment, and you need to be prepared for what that means, both in a practical sense and mentally/emotionally.
Speak with your partners, roommates, friends, and comrades about this. Know who is at the most risk to be arrested and what they will likely experience in prison. For example, BIPOC and disabled people are at a much higher risk when dealing with police and ICE agents. Under no circumstances would I recommend trans women/transfemme folks risk jail or prison time. Be prepared to risk sustaining psychological trauma. Draw and maintain the boundaries you need around any activism, resistance, or revolutionary activity.
I'll go more in depth on what migrants have to expect during the first 100 days of the second Trump term in a later post.
Please add more ideas and resources below if you have them, or make your own post and alert me so I can boost.
371 notes · View notes
psychotrenny · 6 months ago
Text
Like when are all of Biden's idiot fans gonna realise that he is not the "lesser evil". They love threatening people with how any opposition to Biden is gonna let Trump win and how Trumps gonna do all these awful things to the US as though said awful things aren't already happening under Biden. Increased border militarisation and deportation of migrants, loss of reproductive rights, legal assaults on the existence of gay and transgender people, corporate malpractice, police brutality etc etc. Like they're not just continuing to happen they've actually gotten worse under Biden than they were under the Orange Satan himself. The only substantial difference between them is foreign policy and in that area Biden is actually even bloodthirsty; in particular he's been an especially bad zionist for his entire political career and there's nothing to indicate that Trump would have somehow handled it worse beyond the mindless truism of "Orange Man Bad". Looking at their actual policies, voting for Joe Biden isn't gonna protect anyone within the US and is arguably more dangerous for the rest of the world (i.e. where the majority of the world's population lives). There is no "harm reduction" here.
If you're actually looking to help create a better world and protect vulnerable people, as opposed to feeling good that you helped the blue team win, then you're going to have to do it through avenues beyond voting for Joe. Vote third party, withhold your vote to pressure the democrats into nominating a better candidate, engage in action beyond electoralism; there are plenty of options out there. And they're all more effective than lecturing people on the computer (most of whom don't even live in your country they're just part of your empire and so forced to follow the politics) about how being mean to Biden makes you functionally a fascist or whatever
507 notes · View notes
Text
Everything! Everything this man is saying is so damned true. If you are someone who willingly voted for Trump while knowing what he'll do once he gets in Office again.
Deeply FUCK YOU! If you're a person that refuses to vote against him and didn't do anything to stop him at all than FUCK YA'LL too.
If you are a Muslim or Latino or a Non-Black POC that supported and voted for Trump and are now worried about being deported and banned from the country, I really don't feel sorry for any of ya'll. Some of ya'll non-Black POC countine to showcase that ya'll will always choose White Supremacy and Whiteness at the end of the day while simultaneously voting against your own self interests while still being anti-Black as hell.
You won't get any sympathy from me whatsoever. Ya'll Fuckers wanted this so deal with it.
To the percentage of White Women who yet again let down Black Women & other Women of Color by voting for having less bodily anatomy and less rights than you're great great-grandmother, Ya'll don't deserve any sympathy neither.
Pro-Palestine people, FUCK OFF too. Ya'll are also full of bullshit and have showcased that ya'll truly don't give a Fuck about Palestinians or Gazans lives when you let a raging White supremacist like Trump who have said he'll let Netanyahu " Finish the Job", and will have no remorse or issues Nuking the hell out of both Gaza and Palestine altogether.
Ya'll aren't " activists " of any kind and have shown just how unserious, radicalized, brainwashed extremists ya'll truly are in terms of your so-called " Support ".
To the percentage of brain-dead Black men who also voted for this bastard, I rarely used the N-word in my vocabulary. But ya'll are truly some stupid-ass Nigg*s. You're character as a person is garbage and you are a disgrace to your grandparents and many other Black people of the Civil rights movement who fought and died for your fucking ass and this is how you repay them.
By voting for a White supremacist and beyond racist piece of shit. Ya'll Uncle Tom's or I should say Ruckuses don't deserve any sympathy neither.
The third-party voters and those who wasted their vote on Jill stein as a protest vote, ya'll are the stupidest group of people alive and FUCK ALL OF YA'LL as well.
I've seriously had enough of this shit. I'm tired and sick of being held hostage by the ignorant and stupid and hateful people of this damned country.
I'm just so fucking sick.
Ya'll won't get any sympathy from me if you actually wanted this man in power again or refused to actually vote against him during the election.
You've shown ya'll true characters and how horrible of people ya'll truly are.
Don't expect any sympathy or empathy towards you if you're the one who wanted this to happen.
179 notes · View notes
pluckyredhead · 8 days ago
Note
Hey, I don’t blame you if you don’t want to respond right now, but I just wanted to acknowledge that you were completely right to insist that people should have voted for the Democratic candidate if they didn’t want Trump, regardless of if they completely agreed with the Democratic candidate or not. We wouldn’t be in this situation if more people thought like you. And I hope more of the “both sides are just as bad” people remember this for next time.
I appreciate the thought, and you're right that we need every vote, every time, all the time.
But that's not what swung this election. There was a big shift to the right among men, particularly low information voters. And exit polls show that the economy was the biggest driver of those votes. It was not the very small number of extremely online leftists who abstained from voting or voted third party who caused this. It was people who absorb Fox News uncritically and/or fail to understand that Trump was terrible for the economy and will be terrible again, that Biden pulled us out of a recession, that prices are high because of greedflation and not inflation.
And, you know, fascists. But mostly people who are so under-informed and actively dis-informed that they think Trump deporting thousands of people will magically make gas cheaper.
I don't know how to reach those people. Our media landscape is so fractured that they are literally living in a different reality than I am, where the things I see as so obvious and self-evident don't exist to them, or exist only as lies. A second Trump presidency with its inevitable rolling back of regulations about social media disinformation and equally inevitable threats to honest journalism is only going to make it harder.
But here's what I know:
We're going to remember to eat, and drink water, and sleep. We are going to hold our loved ones close.
Lock down your birth control. Get your vaccines. Know where your important paperwork is.
Read On Tyranny by Timothy Snyder. Read Hope in the Dark by Rebecca Solnit.
Check for misinformation and disinformation before you share something.
Posting online is not activism. Fighting online is not activism. Share resources, yes. Otherwise, block and move on, because...
Infighting didn't save us this time, and it will never save us. We are going to have to build coalitions. I'm going to get involved in my local progressive politics. I urge everyone who can to do the same. You are going to meet people who are not exactly like you, who disagree with you, who you don't like. If they believe in democracy and equal rights and justice for everyone? Then they are your allies in this fight and you need every single one of them.
America has never lived up to her ideals, but I still believe in them: that we are all created equal. If we never get there, it will still always be a fight worth fighting.
So let's fight.
175 notes · View notes
brainddeadd · 25 days ago
Text
Tumblr media
The Proposal
When a sudden immigration issue threatens to deport you back to Canada, you devise a plan: convince your charming but infuriating neighbor, Quinn Hughes, to marry you. What starts as a wild scheme leads to unexpected feelings, hilarious misadventures, and a deeper connection.
this was originally going to be a series but my brain went pooft
Tumblr media
Your life is officially a disaster. All it took was a single letter from immigration. Due to some bureaucratic nightmare, your visa is expiring, and you’re suddenly at risk of being deported back to Canada—a place you haven’t lived in years. Your job, your friends, your entire life is here now. You pace your apartment, chewing on your lip, heart racing with panic. There has to be a solution, some way to stay.
That’s when the idea hits you—crazy, reckless, and entirely illegal.
You need someone to marry you.
But not just anyone. It has to be someone local, single, and trustworthy enough to go along with this scheme. Unfortunately, your options are limited. And then you think of your neighbor: Quinn Hughes.
The thought makes you groan aloud. Sure, he’s gorgeous—with his sharp jawline, quiet charm, and infuriating smirk—but the two of you are more like frenemies than anything else. Your relationship consists mostly of snarky comments in passing and the occasional argument over his terrible parking. But desperate times call for desperate measures. And besides, if anyone can convincingly pretend to hate you while still marrying you, it’s Quinn.
The Proposal:
Later that evening, you find yourself standing outside Quinn’s door, chewing nervously on the inside of your cheek. The moment he opens it, dressed in a hoodie and gym shorts, you blurt out, “I need you to marry me.”
Quinn blinks, stunned. “What?”
You take a deep breath. “It’s not what it sounds like. It’s just… immigration messed up my visa, and if I don’t fix this soon, I’m going to be deported. The fastest way to stay is if I marry a U.S. citizen.”
He leans against the doorframe, arms crossed, a hint of amusement in his dark eyes. “And you thought I was the best option?”
“Yes,” you say, trying to sound confident. “I mean, you’re already in my life. Sort of. And it’s not like you have a girlfriend or anything, so…”
Quinn’s lips twitch with the beginnings of a smile. “You do realize this is illegal, right?”
“Only if we get caught,” you say quickly. “Look, it’s just a piece of paper. We don’t have to actually act married. We just have to fool immigration long enough for me to get my green card, and then we can… annul it or whatever.”
He studies you for a moment, as if weighing the insanity of your request. “What’s in it for me?”
You rack your brain for something to offer. “I’ll stop giving you shit about your parking.”
Quinn chuckles softly. “That’s it?”
“And… I’ll buy you coffee every morning,” you add, desperate.
He lets out a long, exasperated sigh, rubbing the back of his neck. “You owe me. Big time.”
Your heart leaps. “So that’s a yes?”
Quinn shrugs, looking both amused and resigned. “Guess I’ve got nothing better to do.”
Hilarious Misadventures Ensue:
From the moment Quinn agrees, things spiral into a series of chaotic events. You and Quinn suddenly have to act like the perfect couple, and it’s harder than you anticipated—mainly because the two of you are polar opposites.
1. The Wedding: You decide on a quick courthouse wedding to make it official. There’s no fanfare—just you in a white sundress and Quinn looking mildly annoyed in a button-down shirt.
“I feel like we should say something meaningful,” you whisper as the judge prepares to officiate.
Quinn smirks. “Like what? ‘Til deportation do us part’?”
Despite yourself, you snort, and the judge gives you both a strange look. You manage to keep a straight face just long enough to exchange vows—if you can even call them that—and sign the marriage license.
“Well, Mrs. Hughes,” Quinn teases after, flashing a grin. “How does it feel to be married?”
“Like I made a huge mistake,” you reply with a playful glare.
2. The Fake Instagram Life: To sell the story, you both agree to post a few couple-y photos on social media. The problem? Neither of you are exactly Instagram-savvy.
Quinn’s first attempt is a blurry photo of the two of you holding coffee cups. “What’s wrong with it?” he asks, frowning as you groan.
“It looks like a hostage situation, Quinn.”
After several failed attempts, you finally manage a decent photo: you sitting on his lap, laughing as he pretends to kiss your cheek. It’s fake, of course. Completely fake. But the way his hand rests on your waist feels a little too real.
3. Immigration Interview Disaster: The immigration interview is the real test, and it’s an absolute disaster.
The officer asks simple questions: “How did you two meet?” “What’s Quinn’s favorite food?”
You both answer at the same time, giving completely different answers.
“Spaghetti,” you say.
“Chicken tenders,” Quinn mutters.
You shoot him a look. “Since when?”
“I told you that last week,” he whispers back, exasperated.
The officer narrows her eyes, and you and Quinn exchange panicked glances. Somehow, you scrape through the interview, but not without promising each other to actually learn more about each other next time.
Feelings Get Complicated:
What started as a transactional arrangement begins to shift. The longer you spend time together—watching TV on his couch, cooking dinner side by side, sharing space in ways that feel dangerously domestic—the more the lines blur between what’s fake and what isn’t.
One rainy night, you find yourself curled up against Quinn on the couch, his arm casually draped around your shoulders. Your heart pounds in your chest, and you wonder if he feels it too.
“This was supposed to be fake,” you whisper, almost afraid to say it aloud.
Quinn’s hand brushes your arm, sending shivers down your spine. “Yeah,” he murmurs. “But it doesn’t feel fake anymore.”
You look up at him, your breath hitching as his gaze drops to your lips. Before you can overthink it, he leans in, capturing your mouth in a soft, tentative kiss. It’s not rushed or rehearsed—it’s real. And it’s everything you didn’t know you wanted.
The Inevitable Realization:
Over the next few weeks, everything changes. The fake touches—his hand on your back, your fingers laced through his—become second nature. Quinn starts leaving his toothbrush next to yours. You start falling asleep in his bed more often than not.
And then, one morning, it hits you. You’re not faking anymore.
You sit across from him at breakfast, watching as he scrolls through his phone, a lazy smile tugging at his lips. It’s terrifying, how easy this has become.
“What are you thinking?” Quinn asks, glancing up from his phone.
You smile softly. “That maybe this wasn’t such a crazy idea after all.”
Quinn’s eyes crinkle with amusement, but there’s warmth there too—something deeper, more genuine. “Guess we’ll have to stay married, then.”
You laugh, reaching across the table to take his hand. “Looks like you’re stuck with me, Hughes.”
And for the first time, he doesn’t seem to mind at all.
171 notes · View notes
karlachismylife · 8 days ago
Text
Don't know if anyone here needs or wants to hear it, but really, from someone who's been born into Putin's reign and is still living it. Life doesn't end there. Dystopia doesn't knock on your door the next day after inauguration.
No, it's not gonna be all sunshine and rainbows, and they most likely will try to make it worse, but shit like this isn't done in mere seconds. I might not understand it fully, because for me elections never have been "the time to decide", but please, try not to let the panicking consume you. Take care of yourself. Form communities and networks. This is the shit we lacked and now it's borderline impossible to organize on lower levels here (people still do it. people still fight for other people.)
This is not the end of the world, and if you keep going, it won't be the end of the world tomorrow, in a month and in a year too.
Also please remember that they all are old as fuck and you have big chances to outlive them. Don't lessen your chances by neglecting yourself and your community.
Sincerely, your fucking Russian that is very much living the "dark future" some of you are panicking about. Key word is living. And others are too. Helping people avoid being sent to war, helping people avoid being deported, helping women escape all kinds of abuse. Distributing food and protecting animals they are trying to kill. Fighting against ruining environment. Keeping extincting languages of some minorities alive.
We are living. You'll live too. You have it in you to stand together. I absolutely believe in you.
171 notes · View notes