#Keywords: self-reflection

[purefilly-connection]

The Weight of Expectations: Exploring Fairness, Respect, and the “Queen Bee” Title

I recently reflected on something my stepfather used to call me—“Queen Bee.” It was an affectionate nickname, one I now realize carried meanings that have evolved over time. For him, it was likely a playful acknowledgment of my personality, maybe even a recognition of how I carried myself with confidence and certainty. But now, as I hear echoes of this title in how others perceive me, I’ve begun…

[nexusofsorcery]

Unlocking the Mysteries: Exploring the World of Free Tarot Reading

IntroductionDemystifying Tarot ReadingTarot Reading BasicsAccessing Free Tarot ReadingsOnline Tarot WebsitesTarot AppsYouTube Tarot ReadersTarot Card DecksExploring Tarot Business IdeasOnline Tarot Reading ServicesTarot Card Deck SalesTarot Classes and WorkshopsTarot Blog or YouTube ChannelInterpreting Your Tarot ReadingTrust Your IntuitionLearn the Card MeaningsJournal Your ReadingsCommon…

[pearlprincess02]

pluto in a man's birthchart

pluto in 1st house

with pluto in the 1st house, a man often experiences life with intense passion and a profound sense of power and control. his presence can be magnetic, drawing others in while he navigates deep-seated issues of obsession and jealousy. this placement fosters a transformative approach to self-expression, where renewal comes through confronting personal taboos and exploring the subconscious. his sexuality is marked by a powerful, often compelling energy that drives him to uncover and embrace hidden desires and deeper truths about himself. in relationships, this intensity can lead to a dynamic where power plays a significant role, pushing him toward profound personal growth and understanding.

keywords: magnetic enigma, alpha, dark horse, intense lover, power player, obsessive pursuer, transformative leader, taboo breaker, complex anti-hero, passionate visionary.

examples from movies/tv: don draper (mad men), patrick bateman (american psycho), tom ripley (the talented mr. ripley), dexter morgan (dexter), jesse pinkman (breaking bad)

pluto in 2nd house

with pluto in the 2nd house, a man’s approach to life is deeply intertwined with intensity and passion, especially regarding personal values and material security. he often seeks power and control through financial stability and possessions, leading to obsessive tendencies about wealth and resources. this placement can stir feelings of jealousy over material success or status, pushing him toward significant transformation and renewal in his self-worth and values. delving into taboos and the subconscious, he explores deep-seated fears and desires related to his value system and personal assets. his sexuality is characterized by a profound, sometimes all-consuming drive, revealing a need to merge deeply with his desires and those of his partners, transforming both self and relationship dynamics.

keywords: resourceful enigma, possessive tycoon, obsessive collector, transformative financier, taboo-breaking sensualist, passionate materialist, controlling patriarch, 

examples from movies/tv: gordon gekko (wall street), frank underwood (house of cards), walter white (breaking bad), tyler durden (fight club), michael corleone (the godfather),

pluto in 3rd house

with pluto in the 3rd house, a man experiences intense passion and drive in his communication and intellectual pursuits. his need for power and control manifests through his interactions and thought processes, often leading to obsessive focus on his ideas and relationships. jealousy might surface in his exchanges, particularly if he feels challenged or threatened intellectually. this placement fosters significant transformation and renewal through exploring deeply held beliefs and confronting subconscious patterns. he may be drawn to uncover and engage with taboos, especially those related to communication and learning. in sexuality, his approach is intense and transformative, reflecting a deep desire to connect profoundly and intellectually with his partners, reshaping his perceptions and experiences of intimacy.

keywords: intense communicator, manipulative wordsmith, obsessive researcher, transformative thinker, taboo-breaking provocateur, passionate debater, controlling intellect, 

examples from movies/tv: hannibal lecter (the silence of the lambs), john doe (se7en), tony stark (iron man), roy waller (matchstick men), william foster (falling down),

pluto in 4th house

with pluto in the 4th house, a man’s intensity and passion are deeply rooted in his home life and family dynamics. his quest for power and control often centers on creating a secure and dominant presence within his domestic sphere, leading to obsessive tendencies regarding his personal space and family relationships. jealousy may emerge over issues of control or security within the home. this placement drives profound transformation and renewal through revisiting and resolving deep-seated familial and emotional issues. he is drawn to explore taboos and subconscious fears related to his upbringing and emotional foundations. in sexuality, his approach is deeply transformative, seeking to merge his intimate desires with a profound emotional connection, reshaping his understanding of personal and relational intimacy.

keywords: intense patriarch, controlling homebody, obsessive family man, transformative foundation builder, taboo-breaking ancestor, passionate nurturer, 

examples from movies/tv: norman bates (psycho), tyrion lannister (game of thrones), thomas shelby (peaky blinders), tony soprano (the sopranos), frank gallagher (shameless),

pluto in 5th house

with pluto in the 5th house, a man’s intensity and passion are channeled into his creative pursuits, romantic relationships, and self-expression. his desire for power and control often manifests through his creative projects and romantic involvements, leading to obsessive behaviors around these areas. jealousy might surface in matters of love or competition, driving him to confront deeper issues of self-worth and recognition. this placement encourages significant transformation and renewal through exploring and redefining his sources of pleasure and creativity. he may be drawn to uncover and engage with taboos related to self-expression and romance, delving into the subconscious aspects of his desires. in sexuality, his approach is profoundly transformative, seeking to fuse passion with emotional depth, reshaping his experiences of intimacy and personal fulfillment.

keywords: intense charmer, controlling stage presence, obsessive performer, transformative creator, taboo-breaking artist, passionate lover, 

examples from movies/tv: christian grey (fifty shades of grey), james bond (james bond series), joker (the dark knight), david aames (vanilla sky), bojack horseman (bojack horseman),

pluto in 6th house

with pluto in the 6th house, a man’s intensity and passion are deeply intertwined with his work, health, and daily routines. his drive for power and control is channeled into his professional life and personal well-being, often leading to obsessive behaviors regarding productivity and perfectionism. jealousy may arise in competitive work environments or over perceived inadequacies in his routines. this placement promotes profound transformation and renewal through confronting and overhauling old habits and health issues. he is compelled to explore taboos and subconscious fears related to his work environment and daily life. in sexuality, his approach is transformative, seeking to integrate his desires with a deeper understanding of his own needs and those of his partners, reshaping his intimate connections and personal growth.

keywords: intense workaholic, controlling perfectionist, obsessive researcher, transformative healer, taboo-breaking rebel, passionate servant, 

examples from movies/tv: dr. gregory house (house m.d.), michael bluth (arrested development), howard stark (agent carter), elliot alderson (mr. robot), paul atreides (dune),

pluto in 7th house

with pluto in the 7th house, a man experiences intense passion and drive in his relationships and partnerships. his need for power and control often emerges through dynamics with others, leading to obsessive behaviors and deep-seated issues around partnership and commitment. jealousy may manifest in romantic or business relationships, prompting him to confront and resolve underlying fears. this placement fosters significant transformation and renewal through the exploration and redefinition of his relational patterns. he is drawn to delve into taboos and subconscious patterns related to intimacy and collaboration. in sexuality, his approach is profound and transformative, seeking to deeply connect with partners while continuously evolving his understanding of intimacy and personal connection.

keywords: intense partner, controlling manipulator, obsessive lover, transformative union seeker, taboo-breaking rebel, passionate collaborator, 

examples from movies/tv: julius caesar (rome), gordon ramsay (hell’s kitchen), patrick jane (the mentalist), rick sanchez (rick and morty), victor von doom / doctor doom (fantastic four),

pluto in 8th house

with pluto in the 8th house, a man experiences profound intensity and passion in areas related to intimacy, shared resources, and personal transformation. his drive for power and control often surfaces in matters of joint finances or deep emotional connections, leading to obsessive tendencies and complex dynamics around trust and vulnerability. jealousy may arise over issues of control or emotional depth within relationships. this placement is marked by significant transformation and renewal through confronting and integrating profound psychological and emotional experiences. he is compelled to explore taboos and the subconscious, delving into the darker aspects of his psyche and desires. in sexuality, his approach is intensely transformative, seeking deep, meaningful connections that challenge and reshape his understanding of intimacy and personal power.

keywords: intense enigma, controlling power broker, obsessive investigator, transformative healer, taboo-breaking mystic, passionate lover, 

examples from movies/tv: anton chigurh (no country for old men), nicholas van orton (the game), david (the skin i live in), lestat de lioncourt (interview with the vampire), james bond (casino royale),

pluto in 9th house

with pluto in the 9th house, a man’s intensity and passion are directed towards his pursuit of higher knowledge, philosophical beliefs, and long-distance endeavors. his need for power and control manifests through intellectual and spiritual pursuits, often leading to obsessive exploration of big ideas and ideological frameworks. jealousy might arise in academic or philosophical debates, pushing him to confront deep-seated fears about his beliefs and understanding. this placement drives significant transformation and renewal through a profound reassessment of his worldviews and personal philosophies. he is drawn to uncover taboos and subconscious patterns related to his exploration of meaning and purpose. in sexuality, his approach is intense and transformative, seeking to integrate his desires with a deeper understanding of his own values and how they shape his intimate connections.

keywords: intense philosopher, controlling ideologue, obsessive seeker, transformative visionary, taboo-breaking explorer, passionate idealist, 

examples from movies/tv: richard alpert (lost), professor charles xavier (x-men), clyde shelton (law abiding citizen), frank abagnale jr. (catch me if you can), rick grimes (the walking dead),

pluto in 10th house

with pluto in the 10th house, a man’s intensity and passion are focused on his career, public image, and aspirations for success. his drive for power and control manifests through his professional life, often leading to obsessive behavior in achieving career goals and maintaining a dominant public presence. jealousy may surface in competitive work environments or when confronted with others' success, prompting deep self-reflection and transformation. this placement fosters significant renewal through re-evaluating and reshaping his career path and public persona. he is drawn to explore taboos and subconscious fears related to authority and achievement. in sexuality, his approach is profoundly transformative, seeking to integrate his desires with his ambitions, reshaping his intimate relationships to align with his broader goals and personal power.

keywords: intense leader, controlling visionary, obsessive achiever, transformative titan, taboo-breaking maverick, passionate reformer, 

examples from movies/tv: howard hughes (the aviator), donnie brasco (donnie brasco), j.r. ewing (dallas), bruce wayne / batman (batman begins), hank moody (californication),

pluto in 11th house

with pluto in the 11th house, a man’s intensity and passion are directed towards his social circles, friendships, and long-term goals. his quest for power and control often plays out within group dynamics or through his involvement in social causes, leading to obsessive behavior in achieving his idealistic visions. jealousy might arise in relation to his peers or within social networks, prompting him to confront deep-seated fears about acceptance and influence. this placement drives significant transformation and renewal through a profound reassessment of his role within groups and his aspirations. he is drawn to explore taboos and subconscious patterns related to social interactions and collective ideals. in sexuality, his approach is intense and transformative, seeking to align his intimate connections with his broader social and personal ambitions.

keywords: intense revolutionary, controlling idealist, obsessive reformer, transformative visionary, taboo-breaking rebel, passionate humanist, 

examples from movies/tv: jim morrison (the doors), lenny leonard (the simpsons), george costanza (seinfeld), michael scott (the office), boris yellnikoff (whatever works),

pluto in 12th house

with pluto in the 12th house, a man experiences profound intensity and passion within his inner world and subconscious mind. his need for power and control often manifests through hidden or private struggles, leading to obsessive behaviors around his personal fears and psychological patterns. jealousy may emerge from unseen or repressed emotions, prompting deep self-exploration and confrontation with his own shadow self. this placement fosters significant transformation and renewal through working on internal issues and subconscious material. he is drawn to uncover taboos and delve into the depths of his psyche, exploring hidden aspects of his being. in sexuality, his approach is deeply transformative, seeking to integrate his desires with a profound understanding of his inner self, reshaping his intimate relationships through personal growth and introspection.

keywords: intense recluse, controlling shadow self, obsessive seeker, transformative healer, taboo-breaking mystic, passionate visionary, 

examples from movies/tv: travis bickle (taxi driver), rorschach (watchmen), jack torrance (the shining), david (the omen), donnie darko (donnie darko),

all observations are done by me !!! @pearlprincess02

[thefemigirl]

★ Reset Your YouTube

With the new year approaching, there’s a buzz in the air. It’s the perfect time to reflect on where we’ve been and where we’re heading. This year doesn’t have to look like the last one. If you’re planning a glow-up, stepping into a new mindset, or just becoming the person you’ve always wanted to be, here’s a method that can genuinely change the game: your YouTube feed.

Let’s be real, YouTube isn’t just entertainment. It’s also one of the most powerful platforms for self-improvement and learning. But if your feed is filled with videos that no longer serve your goals, it’s time to take charge and reset.

▸ Step 1: Unsubscribe From the Old You

First things first, go through your subscriptions and be brutally honest with yourself. Ask, “How often do I watch content from this channel? Does this align with who I’m becoming?”

Don’t worry about missing out. This isn’t about cutting off enjoyment—it’s about making space for growth.

Personal Example: I used to be subscribed to a lot of gaming channels because they were my go-to for entertainment. But now? I’m focusing on building my best self, so I said goodbye.

▸ Step 2: Hit the Reset Button

If you’re ready to go extreme (and trust me, this works wonders), delete your YouTube watch history. This is your ultimate clean slate.

Here’s how: Go to your YouTube settings, click “Manage All Activity,” and clear your watch history.

Why this works: YouTube’s algorithm will stop showing you videos based on your past habits. This means no more random recommendations that pull you back into old habits.

Pro Tip: Pair this with your new subscriptions to train the algorithm into showing you content that inspires and uplifts.

▸ Step 3: Subscribe to the Future You

This is the fun part. Fill your feed with creators who embody the energy you want to bring into the new year. Look for channels that motivate you, teach you, and align with your goals for 2025.

Being a femi girl, I will recommend some channels that are personally helping me upgrade myself:

Tam Kaur ▹ link

Alonna Elaine ▹ link

Bahja Abdi ▹ link

Adama Lorna ▹ link

Maya Galore ▹ link

Jillz Guerin ▹ link

Kisha Alejandra ▹ link

Thewizardliz ▹ link

Estelle Richter ▹ link

Simonesquared ▹ link

How to Find More: Search for videos with keywords like “level up,” “self-improvement,” “becoming her,” or “glow up in 2025.” Spend time exploring until you find creators who truly resonate with your vision.

▸ Step 4: Set Boundaries for Entertainment

It’s okay to watch fun and lighthearted content too, but be intentional. Ask yourself, “Is this adding value to my life?” If not, consider limiting your time with it.

Create playlists: Dedicate a playlist to motivational and growth-oriented videos. This will be your go-to space when you need a boost.

Schedule your entertainment: Watch for enjoyment, but don’t let it consume hours that could be spent learning or creating.

Resetting your YouTube feed might seem like a small change, but trust me, it’s powerful. When you surround yourself with content that aligns with your goals, you’re reinforcing the mindset and habits that will take you there!

So, I wish you the best of luck,

[personastrologyhub]

Degree Theory Series: The Leo Degrees (5°, 17°, 29°): Unveiling the Complexities of Power, Prestige, and Presence

☆ Leo degrees represent a striking influence—one that combines ambition, charisma, romance, and a near-magical allure. The house that Leo is in your chart is reflective of the area of life that you have the potential to receive a lot of attention.  It is literally the sign of reaching for the stars.   But beneath the well-known themes of fame, leadership, and power, these degrees have deeper, sometimes hidden qualities that shape the lives they touch. Here’s an exploration into these powerful degrees, plus the distinctive flavors they create when combined with different planetary energies.

5° Leo: The Catalyst for Expression and Presence

Keywords: Bold action, self-expression, initiator, elite status, teaching and guidance.

☆° ✩࿐

Personality and Physicality: Known as a degree that heightens presence, 5° Leo lends a dignified, commanding air that can be quite magnetic. David Hasselhoff’s for example has a Venus at 5 degrees of Leo. Back in the day, David was known for his magnetic charm and stage presence. He had set the Guinness world record of the most watched man on Tv. This degree supports his appeal as the central figure of Baywatch, Knight Rider and other things, and it shows his ability to thrive under the spotlight. He had set the Guinness world record of the most watched man on Tv.

5° Leo isn’t just the “leader” degree; it often marks those who naturally attract authority and influence without having to seek it.

Hidden Quality of Resourcefulness: A lesser-known quality of 5° Leo is its connection to resourcefulness in high-stakes situations. Those with this degree on key planets often discover remarkable ingenuity under pressure, especially in challenging or isolating circumstances. To thrive in the spotlight, you have to be very resilient.

17° Leo: The Degree of Visionary Influence and Endurance

Keywords: Legacy, public service, intellectual pursuits, mentorship, teaching roles, family connections.

Social Reach and Legacy: 17° Leo reflects someone whose influence extends over time, resonating through a legacy, particularly through teaching, law, or service roles. the 17th degree is the 2nd highest degree amongst the leo degrees (5, and 29 are the other leo degrees) meaning that it has a “longevity” behind it. There’s often a connection to mentorship or guiding others, and those with 17° Leo placements may be naturally drawn to academia, justice, or philosophical pursuits. They often think in terms of generations and long-term impacts.

Oprah has her MC in 17 degree of Libra.

Elvis Presley is a prominent example of a celebrity with a 17° placement, specifically with his Sun at 17° Capricorn, which is influenced by the “Leo degree” due to degree theory. This degree is associated with lasting fame, a magnetic stage presence, and the ability to create legacy and extend over time. Elvis Presleys music has the ability to transcend time—this aligns with Elvis’s legendary status as the “King of Rock and Roll.” The 17° Leo degree amplifies qualities like charisma, recognition, and impact in the public eye, traits strongly reflected in Elvis’s career and enduring influence in music and culture.

Another example is George Michael, whose Ascendant is at 17° Cancer, lending him a path aligned with Leo qualities—drawing attention, captivating fans, and excelling as a charismatic performer in the entertainment industry. Both figures illustrate how the 17° Leo degree enhances the potential for significant, long-lasting public impact and memorable artistry.

These cases highlight how the 17° degree is seen as one of prestige and enduring influence in charts of famous figures, marking individuals with an aura of distinction and an ability to maintain a lasting legacy in their field.

The Role of Family and Support: This degree frequently connects individuals with family lineage, both in values and sometimes through inheritance or positions of responsibility within family networks. The “father” degree, it suggests an ability to support or uplift family lines or nations—carrying a certain gravitas that inspires collective respect. Just as 17° Leo was prominent in Bill Clinton’s chart, it speaks to enduring influence, as well as the idea of a “national father figure.” Again with Presley he was considered the Father or King of Rock and Roll.

Lesser-Known Influence in Social Structure: Lesser known is 17° Leo’s gift for navigating social structures, from rallying support to surviving intrigue. Individuals with this degree may exhibit a resilient streak, successfully facing threats or challenges within power structures=Much like Elvis who did receive multiple death threats and kidnap warnings, particularly while performing in Las Vegas. 

29° Leo: The Degree of Transformative Leadership and Strategic Vision

Keywords: Finality, transformation, intuition, covert planning, prestige, challenging circumstances.

Mystery and Power Dynamics: Known as an “anaretic” degree, 29° Leo carries themes of completion, change, and high-stakes decisions. People with this degree tend to face intense personal or public challenges that demand creative problem-solving and often put them in complex or strategic roles. A bit of a “chameleon” degree, it suggests someone who can operate under the radar and emerge victorious, often as a reformer or innovator within traditional structures.  Leaders like Winston Churchill, who had his Moon at 29° Leo, epitomize the strength of this degree. Similarly, Donald Trump's 29° Leo Ascendant underscores a charismatic presence and his controversial but impactful role in the public sphere, navigating complex political power structures. They guy became the president of the United States at one point and is up for office again. 

Transformation and Symbolic Rebirth: 29° Leo may indicate the ability to work behind the scenes or in covert ways, potentially in intelligence, diplomacy, or advocacy roles where resilience is paramount. Often, individuals here face life events that force them to “become someone new,” such as a leader rising unexpectedly or a figure dealing with transformative personal setbacks. Just as Churchill rose during Britain’s darkest hour, those with 29° Leo can emerge from crises as symbols of strength and change. his degree also enhances adaptability, suggesting a capacity to emerge stronger after setbacks or public scrutiny. This is also seen in Drake (BBL Drizzy) and Heidi Klum, both with Ascendants at 29°, which contributes to their enduring relevance and adaptability in the ever-changing entertainment landscape.

Lesser-Known Themes of Hidden Loyalty: There’s also a lesser-known aspect of loyalty and readiness to defend others, even to the point of self-sacrifice. This degree attracts followers or allies who support them in unlikely ways, often during critical transitions or public shifts.

Planetary Combinations:

Mercury at 29° Leo: Mercury here indicates someone who speaks with finality and influence, often giving speeches or communications with a lasting impact. They may find themselves in pivotal discussions, historical moments, or transformative media.

Pluto at 29° Leo: This pairing suggests a powerful leader who can influence others profoundly, sometimes by overturning existing power structures. Pluto at 29° Leo is highly transformative, especially in public roles, and may attract both fame and intrigue, giving the individual an almost mythic quality.

Uranus at 29° Leo: With Uranus, there’s a push for radical change and an ability to innovate under pressure. Individuals with this placement can disrupt the status quo effectively and are unafraid to act independently, even if it means losing support temporarily. Their vision is ahead of its time, and they may be involved in pioneering work or historic moments of change.

Hidden Qualities Across the Leo Degrees

Each of these degrees in Leo also carries unique subtleties, especially when it comes to handling public pressure, love for prestige, and overcoming personal trials. Whether seen in how they survive adversities (often with an unexpected inner resilience) or in their commitment to their people or causes, Leo degrees add depth and charisma that’s impossible to ignore.

If you hold one of these degrees in a major placement, consider it a call to embody love, loyalty, and leadership in your unique style. The Leo degree asks for authenticity and confidence, even when the stakes are high.

Observation:

Sun at 5° Leo: A classic position for leaders who are highly visible and admired. The Sun here drives an ambition that others respect, even if they don’t fully understand the drive behind it. There’s a fierce desire to succeed on one’s terms, often in high-profile careers or pursuits.

Moon at 5° Leo: Emotional expression is vital here, with a need to connect in visible, memorable ways. A Moon at 5° Leo can feel happiest when making an impact in social or familial spheres, perhaps guiding or inspiring others. There’s a special talent for evoking loyalty and support from people, often based on an instinctive understanding of group dynamics.

Mars at 5° Leo: Mars here is a warrior spirit that fights with purpose. It’s often associated with a physical stature or confidence that commands space, possibly leading to military or athletic pursuits. There’s a heightened ability to rally others, leading to leadership roles that arise naturally in tense situations.

[casper-spills]

˚₊‧꒰ა 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐀𝐮𝐠𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐌𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

ᴘɪʟᴇ 1 ~ ᴘɪʟᴇ 2 ~ ᴘɪʟᴇ 3

✦Masterlist ✦Paid Readings ✦Support me through Kofi

𓆩♡𓆪 𝙎𝙐𝙈𝙈𝙀𝙍 𝘿𝙄𝙎𝘾𝙊𝙐𝙉𝙏 50%𝙊𝙁𝙁 !! 𓆩♡𓆪

Ends on September 22nd

Discaimer: Tarot reading is for entertainment purposes only and should never take the place of professional therapy or professional legal, medicinal or financial advice.

| KO-FI SHOP |

☁︎ ᴘɪʟᴇ 1 ☁︎

𝑾𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒆𝒙𝒑𝒆𝒄𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒉

The Hermit Reversed

Keywords & Signs: Venus, scorpio, 3rd house, gemini, mercury, 9, torch, snow, corn field, black, lamp post, green, new moon in taurus, mintaken, mermaid, ocean, cave, retreat, hillwalking, belonging, lightworkers

Messages: 'Prosperity lies ahead' 'Longing for home'

This month will be focused on your social life and learning how you can come out of your shell. You might have spent a long time withdrawn from the world and perhaps you'll be looking for a change this month or you could be resistant to this change. There was a time where solitude was helpful for you but now is the time to get back out there and get back in touch with the people around you.

If you have been very social and this is not the case, then alternatively, it could mean that you've been avoiding self reflection because you're afraid of what you might find. Or it could mean you are too rigid with how you think and tend to get tunnel visioned on certain things which might be hindering your ability to see a something from another perspective. Take a step back, reassess the situation and reflect.

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒍𝒊𝒇𝒆

Three of Cups Upright

Keywords & Signs: Pisces, moon, 10th house, capricorn, saturn, 3, water, waterfall, purple, waxing moon, portal, snake, passage, party, drinks, bar, lightning, anklet

Messages: 'The energy is gaining momentum' 'You're crossing the threshold'

Traits of your current or potential partner: Positive: Dreamy, soft round face, large eyes, sensual lips, good dancer, consistant, secure, loyal, nurturing, feminine Negative: Distracted, day dreamer, emotional, sensitive

If you are in a relationship, it could be that, together, you have plans to celebrate with family and friends. You might be throwing an anniversary or engagement party or it could be getting closer to your wedding day! Alternatively, you may be going to someone else's party together and it will be a great party where you get to be with everyone.

If youre not in a relationship, someone from your past might reappear in your life who could be a potential romantic partner. You may meet them in a social gathering or a party with friends or family that you were invited to go to this month. Lately you might have been thinking about getting back into the dating scene again so this could be the perfect time!

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒔

Ace of Wands Reversed

Keywords & Signs: Capricorn, mercury, 2nd house, taurus, venus, 1, fire, new moon in capricorn, broken mirror, workshop, construction, yellow, gold, sun rays

Messages: 'What is not aligned or needs to chnage?' 'Your hard work is paying off'

You may struggle this month in your finances. You could be losing money on investments or be hit by unexpected costs or bills. In your career, you might receive dissapointing news such as not getting the job you applied for. You will find yourself being more careful with how you spend your money this month.

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒕𝒉

Five of Wands Reversed

Keywords & Signs: Virgo, north node, rahu, 8th house, scorpio, pluto, fire, 5, starseed, full moon in scorpio, blue, sport centre, game, saturn, neptune, orange

Messages: 'What lights you up?' 'It's time to release negativity'

This month you are being asked to pay attention to matters related to your abdomen, intestines, gallbladder, pancreas and liver.

You could be struggling to fight off an illness and you might be more sensitive to food than usual. You might find that eating more foods that are better for your gut could ease your struggle a bit more. Stress could also be a factor, so make sure you are doing things to help with stress or anxiety.

If you play any kind of sport, especially an agressive sport, then you are being asked to be extra careuful while you play this month as you could receive a serious injury.

☁︎ ᴘɪʟᴇ 2 ☁︎

𝑾𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒆𝒙𝒑𝒆𝒄𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒉

Nine of Wands Reversed

Keywords & Signs: Taurus, mercury, 3rd house, gemini, communication, dig, stairs, climb, new moon in sagittarius, priestess, magenta, sphinx gate, fire, the neverending story, wings, barrier, wall, 9

Messages: 'Luck is on your side' 'How are you being called to step up and lead?'

This month will be focused on how you lead others and the way you communicate. There might be some unexpected trouble this month regarding your connections, friends or acquaintances. This may be work related.

You might be a person who feels that your way of doing things is the right way or the most efficient and perhaps you're a person who is known as stubborn or rigid. However, this month, you may reflect on yourself and start to wonder. You will enter a stalemate. You might feel like giving up and start to lack perseverance as you struggle to learn past mistakes.

You could be faced with a situation that forces you to reflect on yourself such as being rejected/abandoned by your team or the people around you. You might see yourself as the last one standing or the only one playing the game but that couldn't be further from the truth. It may be that you need to start seeing eye to eye with your team and try to understand their concerns. You might start to feel defensive or overwhealmed as you are being criticised by others but do your best to hear them out.

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒍𝒊𝒇𝒆

The Hierophant Reversed

Keywords & Signs: Scorpio, saturn, 2nd house, taurus, venus, south node, ketu, green, 5, temple, church, stained glass window, waterfall, pandora's box, freedom

Messages: 'Answer the call; what is your soul calling you to do?' 'Don't let your past hold you back'

Traits of your current or potential partner: Positive: Sharp features, hypnotic eyes, strudy build, hourglass figure, committed, responsible, good boundaries, ambitious, hardworking, diligent, patient, stable, reliable Negative: Restricitve, stingy, depressed, stressed, too serious, traditional

If you are in a relationship, you could be in an unconventional relationship. You could be breaking tradition by not getting married, being the same sex, reversing gender roles, etc. It might come to your attention, this month, that you and your partner may not on the same page when it comes to your values and goals which could be causing conflict or insecurity in the relationship. Try to compromise and meet the other person half way and listen to each others' needs. Ask yourself, will you be able to fulfill each others' needs?

If you are not in a relationship, you could be someone who is not interested in a marriage or a traditional partnership. Perhaps, this month, you will come to a conclusion that you do not want a partner and you are completely happy living a single life.

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒔

King of Cups Upright

Keywords & Signs: Rahu, north node, taurus, 8th house, scorpio, pluto, water, blue, new moon in gemini, play, margarita, magic carpet, holiday, ocean, beach, lake, sun, 14

Messages: 'Communication is key' 'Have fun. Celebrate. Don't be so serious'

In your finances, you will be very stable this month. However, you could be struggling to find a balance between financial security and your material wealth meaning that you are neglecting other areas in your life. You could deny certain activities even if you can afford to do it or you could be refusing to replace that one item in your home (because technically it still works) even though everyone is telling you to get rid of it. This month you are being asked to accept change and welcome new experiences and memories.

Career wise, remember not to give your career your undivided attention. Keep the balance in all areas of your life. This month, you could be offered support or guidance in work. You will discover new ways to create a pleasnt working environment for yourself and you will be well liked and respected by your colleagues.

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒕𝒉

Ace of Cups Upright

Keywords & Signs: Gemini, mars, 7th house, 1, water, full moon in aries, red, cave, birdbath, birds, lake, pond

Messages: 'Share your voice' 'A fiery climax approaches'

This month you are being asked to pay attention to matters related to your hands, lungs and nervous system.

If you have been having problems with health, you will find that your health is improving this month and you are blessed with luck! It might be that this issue has been affecting your mental health but upon hearing this news and being presented this fresh start, you will be full of energy.

Alternatively, if you are trying for a baby, you are in luck! Make sure you are checking in with your doctor because they may have good news for you.

☁︎ ᴘɪʟᴇ 3 ☁︎

𝑾𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒆𝒙𝒑𝒆𝒄𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒉

Queen of Swords Reversed

Keywords & Signs: Libra, jupiter, 3rd house, gemini, mercury, air, 13, boundary, spikes, star, icicle, unbinding, chains, unfinished business, new moon in sagittarius, magenta, generational trauma

Messages: 'Release soul patterns' 'Luck is on your side'

This month will be focused on how you process trauma and learning how to set boundaries. There is a warning for you in this reading. It could be that you have a negative relationship with your mother or mother figure. This person might be be trying to drag you down by spreading malicious gossip or being overly critical of you.

The Queen of Swords reversed is a bitter and cruel woman. She is cold and spiteful. She is a woman who uses trauma as a justification to drag others down. She is someone who is obsessive and controling. Do not think for a moment that she is capable of empathy. You cannot trust her.

This generational trauma may be affecting your ability to move on from the past and be the best version of yourself. Perhaps you fear turning into that cold and bitter person. This is your reminder to reflect and gain a new perspective. This month will be about how you are going to end the cycle.

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒍𝒊𝒇𝒆

Queen of Cups Upright

Keywords & Signs: Cancer, neptune, 2nd house, taurus, venus, water, 13, new moon in sagittarius, cave, magenta, expression, bath, candles, skinny dipping, swimming

Messages: 'Luck in love' 'Express your feelings'

Traits of your current or potential partner: Positive: Intuitive, imaginative, dreamy, innocent, kind, forgiving, compassionate, empathetic, optimistic, ambitious, soft features, expressive, gentle demeanor, broad/large chest Negative: Delusional, naive, sensitive, childish, unrealistic

If you are in a relationship, you are being reminded that you have the emotional support that you might be craving. Perhaps you're afraid that your partner might not be able to fulfill your needs but this is your sign to open up about your feelings and seek emotional support from them. They will make sure you get the support you deserve.

If you're not in a relationship, this is your sign to get out there and meet new people! Romance is coming your way! If you already have someone in mind then this is your sign to shoot your shot. This person could be a quiet and shy person so they might not tell you their feelings until you make it very obvious that you like them back so this is your time to express your feelings!

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒔

Eight of Wands Reversed

Keywords & Signs: Moon, virgo, 7th house, libra, venus, gold, yellow, sun, glow, new moon in leo, 8, roadtrip, rose, wings, highway, fast travel, fire

Messages: 'Confidence is your key to sucess' 'You are in your element'

This month could be a frustrating time in your finances and your career. It might be that the progress in these areas of your life is slowing down or you keep experiencing setbacks, cutbacks, lack of opportunities or promotions. You may be waiting for some feedback or you keep scheduling for meetings which keep getting resqueduled or cancelled. You might make money very slowly this month and you might struggle to reach the financial security that you desire.

Stay patient and spend money carefully. Don't be impulsive. It will all pay off in the end. Once you get over this bump in the road, you will be hit with sudden abundance in money and opportunities! Luck is coming in quickly!

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒕𝒉

Ten of Swords Upright

Keywords & Signs: pisces, saturn, 12th house, neptune, acupuncture clinic, 10, air, denists, surgery room, purple, flowers, waxing crescent moon, chakra, nature, chandelier, grounding

Messages: 'Have faith in your dreams' 'Connect with nature'

This month you are being asked to pay attention to matters related to your feet, toes, lymphatic system and your mental health.

This month, your health may decline to the point you are forced to stop and prioritise your health. You might experience some chronic fatigue, exhaustion, collapse and nervous breakdowns.

If you are struggling with mental health, you might find that taking time off could benefit you. Do some shadow work and pay attention to any addictions or bad habits you may have developed during this time.

☁︎ Thank you for your support! ☁︎

@theladybrownstarot, @loonaticpoe, @depressedcap, @artscapismsworld, @livelythoughts, @theflorestpurple, @swordoftheseeker, @miraclekay97, @fantasticcolortrash, @slashercult, @hearteyedmorena, @pink-sky-butterfly, @reefwaif, @zolarwho, @horselessjockey, @heaven444child

Dividers by @cafekitsune, @animatedglittergraphics-n-more

[bluev0id]

~ What's coming your way? ~

I'm bored at my friend's graduation ceremony, so here's a little reading! Pick one of the four combinations of stones ♡

🌸 Check out my ETSY(link) where I sell jewelry made with these pendants 🌸

1. Green agate + iridescent seashells

If you've been feeling not like yourself or missing something in your life, you will experience a return of what was lost. Expect a wholesome time in nature or engaging in your cultural or family traditions. If you haven't had time for hobbies or enjoying time by yourself, it will be a wonderful period where you'll be able to create, daydream and have some relaxing self care time. Someone from the past might return and you'll be able to fix the broken. On the other side, if you've been experiencing injustice or a lack of order, this will be sorted out.

Keywords : bringing it back, the way it should be, sunshine, traditions, to belong

2. White seashell and opals

There's high expectations on you either from others or yourself. You will want to be on your grind, trying to have a breakthrough. I do sense that there will be a feeling of lack that will guide you through this experience, so make sure to exercise and let go that nagging feeling inside of you that's saying that you're not doing enough. Don't push yourself over the limit. You will be taking life seriously and desiring all the nice things. There might be a woman in your life who will play a major role during this time. Reflect on where your desires come from and what are the things in life that last and matter the most, because through that you’ll be able to reach the paradise you're seeking.

Keywords: lazy, not enough, money, status, a woman

3. Pearls

A period of melancholy is coming your way. You might find yourself crying over memories or enjoying late night walks, staring at the moon through the window before bed. But it's not sadness you'll feel. It's the knowing that life passes and you have to move on and that being alive, despite all the hardship, is beautiful. You will long for someone to be there for you is it a friend or a past/long distance lover, and I see them trying to support you as much as they can. You'll receive sudden kindness from strangers or close ones during this period of your life.

Keywords: love, goodbye, warmth, memories, church, mistakes

4. Red and white agate stones

Honestly, you are that bitch. And your friends love you. I see a period of confidence, support and power coming your way. Your friends or people around you will have your back if you're ready to stand up for them as well. You'll feel empowerment by realising your influence and won't be afraid to speak your mind. When you reply late, you'll have people wondering where you are and if everything is alright. Community and good communication. If you're currently lacking close relationships, then I sense a group of individuals entering your life and being on the same wave as you.

Keywords: shepherd, fuck the rest, parties, friends, pick me up when I'm down

🌸 MY ETSY 🌸

[elusive---ivory]

Yandere!Husband x Mother!Reader

I figured since it is Mother's Day (where I am anyways). I would make another piece about your Yandere husband and your life with him <3. TW: afab, pregnancy mention, nsfw mentions, children, possessive behavior, manipulation.

From the moment he laid his eyes on you, he knew he had to have you. You were everything he could think about. Your eyes, hair, and smile captivated him so much. He was practically dying to be in your arms.

There was one thing in his way, though. It was that you only saw him as a mere friend. Nothing more, nothing less. He had gone through the same experience time and time again. He determined to make you see that he was the one for you.

Whether it be tiny little white lies that shake your self-esteem so that you only come to him for guidance. Or he might sabotage your relationships with your friends to show you that he's the only one you can trust. He would go as far as to create doubt that your current partner could be cheating on you, so that you would dump that partner, just to favor him.

How he would stalk your social media page for hours, searching keywords to get the best photos of you. When you finally let your barriers down, you asked him on a date. At first, he didn't know how to react. He maintained a very cool and calculated persona but bursts into an excited squeal whenever he's around you. He's so grateful to be in your presence. He's like a lovesick puppy!

He would definitely show up with flowers every day because he absolutely adores you. He dresses to impress so you also wonder how many tuxes he owns because he wears so many. He enjoys it when he kisses you. he can't help but stare in your eyes, completely in love.

He had prepared to propose to you the moment he meet you. He wanted you to become his completely. He was patient and he was kind, but only for so long. When you took it upon yourself to ask for his hand in marriage, he was over the moon. He was finally going to get the happy ending he so desperately longed for. He had a ring your size and was already planning wedding preparations.

The day he got married to you would be the best moment of his life. He adores you in your wedding gown and tears up at the sight of you walking down the aisle. He's so happy to share this day with you. You're his only one.

When your children were born, your husband couldn't be more joyous. You had twins, which was double the diapers and tasks. But, he was more than happy to help out with them as toddlers or infants. He loves his children because they are a reflection of his endless love for you. Because you are apart of their creation, he can see your eyes in the twins.

He will die, kill, or even throw a bomb for his beautiful family, and he wouldn't have it any other way.

[barbiedemonaco]

as promised— some girl!driver fashion moodboards !!! starting off with my personal favs charles & george & lewis ❤️🩵💜

lengthy explanation + some more headcanons for each below:

i *personally* believe these three would be very traditionally feminine so this is reflected in my choices again this is all according to my *personal* headcanon which might not be the same as yours and that’s ok.. and yes they wouldn’t be decked out in designer/editorial 24/7 they’re athletes so they’d most likely live in puma or nike tech or lululemon or something idk but if they made as much money as their canon counterparts they might as well serve cunt on a daily basis idc this is my blog and i make the rules

charles

- warm autumn; lots of red obvi i don’t care that canonically charles’ favorite color is blue You’re Red Because I Say So

- i feel like she would get a little quirky and avant-garde with it… she does not have a single plain white tshirt it’s All statement pieces

- following up with the last point some of the cuter stuff i found were cropped tops and all that but i also wanted to pay homage to boy charles who’s a cozy mouse so we also have some cute sweaters in here for her..

- didn’t know how to showcase this here but she wouldn’t wear a bra and it is important to me that you know that

- slight animal theme here with the cheetah print and tabi flats.. it just makes Sense To Me

- for the making of these moodboards i didn’t really look for specific brands or fashion houses i would just pick pieces from my own pinterest boards as i scrolled through them but ive said time and time again that charles would be a die hard miu miu girl it just makes sense to me !!!

- keywords: playful + eclectic + romantic

george

- cool summer; i went with light and airy colors so lots of cream and cyan and powder blue

- silhouette wise i wanted to go with tight/confining pieces ?? to show off her self-discipline and uptightness… character design 101

- i feel like she’d (FOOLISHLY and BLASPHEMOUSLY) be self-conscious of her height so shoe-wise she’d do flats/oxfords/loafers/boat shoes (lol i know..) but if she *had* to wear something more formal she’d go with kitten heels

- keywords: intellectual + subdued + structured

lewis

- bright spring; i stuck with purple/magenta/silver as the main colors on this moodboard for the sake of visual cohesion but i feel like her wardrobe would be much much much more colorful

- with this one i knewww i needed to step my pussy game up bc of who we’re dealing with… someone who knows Actual Fashion.. so i knew i could not for the life of me make something ugly or god forbid boring

- lots of fun glitzy glamour ! i had to physically restrain myself from not doing just cunty clubwear bc this is meant to be for present-day self-actualized crunchy granola lewis not old testament hooking-up-with-rihanna lewis.. ik that version of herself speaks to her like venom

- like boy lewis i feel like she would like to show off her guns so lots of sleeveless tops 🙂‍↕️ but also some more billowing silhouettes !

- she’s tiny so she’d lovee to wear a big ass platform

- keywords: glamorous + sleek + futuristic

[sparklingself]

𝐒𝐔𝐁𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐄𝐅𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐒

Daily reflections #2

The assumption is everything; realization is subconscious and effortless. (Neville, "The Power of Awareness", chapter 15)

It's easy to lose yourself in the material world. The world can be emotionally loaded, it can make you feel intensely and because of that you suddenly feel everything to be so fatal. Then it's easy to forget about the law and fall into the trap of self-victimisation.

I think this trap is where most of us have been our whole lives. We feel that things happen to us, not that things happen from us. And even once we know about and practice the law, it's still easy to stay in that trap. You assume something, but then you look for evidence, you try to force something to come to life and keep thinking about what you could do to actually make your desire realise. Sounds familiar?

But what you must realise is that the realisation of your desire is subconscious and effortless. There is no effort to be made. Stop focusing on this mindset of lack where you're constantly looking. Make peace with the world around you, however it has appropriated itself. Who cares what the world has to say? Just focus on your assumptions. Your inner-self is who you have to focus on.

Blessed is she that believed; for there shall be a performance of those things which were told her from the Lord. Luke 1:45

Belief is the keyword here. It shall inevitably materialise. Know that it is done.

Your assumption guides all your conscious and subconscious movements towards its suggested end so inevitably that it actually dictates the events. (Neville)

This is why it works. You live your whole life through imagination, through your consciousness. Your assumption determines everything: how you think, how you act, how you see things. It also determines what you see in life. It governs everything. Because consciousness is everything.

Dear friend, do not imitate what is evil but what is good. Anyone who does what is good is from God. Anyone who does what is evil has not seen God. 3 John 1:11 

Evil = fear, good = love. Everything you do from fear, is not in accordance with the desired state.

Do not worry about what might go wrong if your new state fashions itself in your world. To worry about the future is to not be the state. Feel you are already who you want to be as a present fact and you will not fear. (Edward Art)

If you're living in fear, you are not in your desired state. Feel it right now and fear will fade away.

[heartbeatbookclub]

insert ask that conveniently makes you talk about sayonika here

I have a lot of thoughts about them. None are particularly structured, really...

Trust really fuckin fed us, y'all. One of the first posts on this blog is me talking all about how it illustrates the parallels between Monika and Sayori, subtle as it is about it. I think in many, many ways, they reflect one another's actions, and on an exceptionally deep level, they both understand what makes the other tick. As a consequence, they're both pretty astute when it comes to recognizing what the other needs, what problems they might be having, and a good way to help them through it. It's hard to put into words...they just get each other, y'know?

Despite that, there are some definite fundamental differences. I think the simplest way to explain it is that Monika has a constant preoccupation with being able to do something right the first time, to be able to do something perfect, while Sayori has long given up the thought that she could do anything without screwing something up, and is instead desperately focused on trying to do good enough. In that way, the both of them sort of cover the other's weaknesses.

In that sense, both of them struggle with the thought of measuring up to others' expectations, and feel this constant need to do better, coupled with this constant thought that they aren't enough. Inferiority complex is the keyword here. Both of them have some pretty clear struggles with their own self-worth...

And the benefit of having each other is invaluable, for that reason. Particularly since the two of them understand each other's struggle, they're able to find the words the other needs to hear, and when they say it, it's more trustworthy because of that understanding.

Monika vents about an issue she's having, trying to find a way to really cope with it, and Sayori's answer immediately pierces straight to the core of the problem, identifying an insecurity which Monika didn't even realize she had. She's able to lay bare what Monika feels so she can actually grasp how to deal with it.

On the flip side, Sayori can hide it all she likes, but Monika's able to see clear through that facade, and identify where Sayori is struggling. She tends to a more subtle approach, simply quietly taking some of that burden, or providing whatever affection, praise, or encouragement she thinks she needs. Without even realizing it, Sayori's feeling better already.

They've got each others' backs, through thick and thin. If Monika's lagging behind, Sayori gives her a gentle push in the right direction. If Sayori needs someone to tell her everything's going to be okay, Monika's right beside her not only telling her that, but elaborating on how things couldn't possibly be that bad, because they have each other.

To get away from more general analysis kind of stuff, I think the two of them would just naturally tend towards a very close relationship. They'd grow reliant on each other without even realizing it, each using the other for needed buffer in any social situation, and relying on each other for support in all areas.

Monika would feel incredibly awkward trying to engage in anything romantic with anyone, but I think her relationship with Sayori being so close would just feel incredibly natural, no matter how it ended up progressing. That doesn't mean that transitioning to romance wouldn't feel awkward as hell still, nor that Monika would really feel confident doing anything (Sayori's taking that lead and she's driving the horse to the end of the line), but her relationship with Sayori would be so close naturally that it wouldn't actually change very much.

Neither of them would really be able to be honest about their feelings at first. And at this critical moment, neither of them would be able to clearly identify the feelings that the other had. Both of them would be way too anxious about the fact that the other might say no, and it could ruin their entire friendship, to say anything about it for the longest time. Neither of them can imagine a life without the other.

I think Sayori might be the one to crack first. I think she'd probably get to a point where she wouldn't be able to handle all the fluttery feelings in her chest when they were this close. She couldn't do anything but be honest about her feelings, no matter how anxious it made her feel.

Monika would be taken aback but obviously reciprocate. Now unsure how to even proceed. I think Monika would be the first to say I love you tho

This might be one of the roughest parts of the base game to really deal with when you think about it for an extended period. I don't want to think about it for an extended period right now so I'm not gonna elaborate (already thinking of enough angst with other fic concepts).

[lupin-et-rose]

Delivery Service

Inspired by this prompt list

Dazai x Pregnant F!->Reader

Incomplete.

Warnings: Angst & Hurt/Comfort. Beware of mild curing, mentions of pregnancy, lactation, breast pumping, sexual organs, themes of bodily insecurities/dysmoprhia, maternal depression/mental health + Playing it fast and loose with maternity/paternity laws and practices.

Keywords/Kinks: 'Gentle & Commanding'

On a midday morning, you find yourself sitting on the edge of your bed, gazing into the full-length mirror across the room and feeling strangely…distant. Sitting there in what used to be a loose T-shirt, smoothing your hand over the swollen curve of your stomach as you stare at yourself in the full-length mirror, the room is empty, the house is empty, everything is quiet, and you are alone.

Every weekday morning has been like this. Only a few weeks into maternity leave, you already find yourself staring into the bedroom mirror every morning. After Dazai has bustled off to work for the morning and kissed you goodbye. After you’ve had the time to fully wake up and roll your pregnant self upright for the day - you catch your reflection in the full-length mirror, and it stops you in your tracks. Your hands wander over the swollen curve of what used to be a loose and oversized T-shirt. —You barely even recognise yourself anymore….

Staring back at you from that mirror is an almost foreign image. The girl looking back at you has grown. The soft, slender features that had graced her face have expanded a bit, her hips are wider, and the once flat stomach is almost entirely eclipsed by the swollen bump sitting there. That was you…but at the same time, it wasn’t.

You have to admit, the sight was almost surreal. It was hard not to stare at yourself in the mirror, watching the once familiar curves of your body disappear slowly into their soft, gravid shape. You’re so focused on the mirror that you almost don’t notice Dazai standing in the doorway, watching you with that usual soft, lovestruck look on his face. His voice, however, brings you out of your thoughts when he calls to you….

The sound of his voice startles you from your reverie. Sure, she'd sometimes daydreamed about her lover coming home early. But even in all her visions, picturing mirages of his love and comfort…he'd never indeed spoken. So, to hear his voice now-

But that doesn't make sense. He's supposed to be at work right now. The day would've just started, paperwork awaiting at everybody's desk, clients coming through the door. There was no way…The bed creaks beneath you as you crane your neck to see--oh my god, he's actually--

"You're here…"

He smiles in that slow, easy way of his, leaning against the doorframe as his eyes wander down your figure, taking in the subtle changes in your form since he was last in your presence. He makes no move to cross the space that separates you, choosing to watch you instead, taking in the sight of you as he replies.

“Of course I am, did you think I’d miss out on seeing a pretty sight like this?”

"I-I thought you'd already left for work-" Yuzuki glanced at the alarm clock on their bedside table. "It's already half-past ten--"

Dazai chuckles, stepping back from the doorway and entering your room, crossing the space in long strides before moving to sit on the edge of the bed next to you. He reaches out to you, placing a hand on the curve of your stomach as he looks up at you, his smile still in place on his face as he gently rubs his hand back and forth, admiring the bump there.

“A few clients won’t kill me. Besides…”

He grins widely.

“I think I’d rather be here with you than out there.”

"Please tell me you at least cleared things with Fukuzawa before you left-" You scanned your lover's face. The last thing you wanted was for your beloved to risk his job or any good standing with your friends, all for the sake of impulsively playing hooky just to look after you.

Dazai keeps smiling, the hand on your stomach moving up to push a strand of hair behind your ear before kissing your cheek affectionately. He laughs at your question and shakes his head. Of course, he did - he might be impulsive, but he’s not stupid.

“Of course, belladona. I told him I had a very important…responsibility~ that I needed to be here for…”

He smiled, leaning forward to kiss your belly gently. Then he looked back up at you. He was only partially sorry - he could never truly bring himself to feel too guilty for choosing to spend time with you.

You smiled and moved his hand to yours, intertwining your fingers. "Okay," you acquiesced, with just the slightest sigh of relief. "I'm glad you're here…"

Dazai squeezed your hand affectionately, moving over on the bed until he was sitting next to you and pulling you against his side, wrapping an arm around your waist and holding you close to him in a gentle embrace. He tilted his head to the side as he looked down at you, still smiling, his thumb rubbing small, soothing circles against your side. You knew he liked to do little things like this, especially now that you were pregnant. He was always touching your stomach, or gently rubbing your sides, or resting his hands and head on it as he tried to sense for movement.

***

[ad-caelestia]

planetary retrograde keywords

mercury - communication breakdown, technological and electrical failure, failed travel plans, lost items, careful and strategic planning, resurfaced personal relationships, deviated plans

venus - lack of affection, separation, romantic tension, conflict, lack of creativity and artistic ability, infertility, resurfaced relationships, self image issues

mars - stasis, impulsivity, lack of passion, lack of motivation, personal defense, confrontation

jupiter - introspection, personal development, reflection

saturn - relief, reflection, personal improvement 

uranus - awakening, realism

neptune - realization, existential purpose 

pluto - subconscious reflection, forceful changes, elimination, letting go

© 2024 ad-caelestia

[fruitswrl]

‧ new year's shifting pick a pile ✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊ ⊹˚

{ i've been meaning to do another collective reading but honestly forgot, but hey it's a new year so... this will just be anything you may need to hear right now. i hope you find what you were looking for, and if i was able to help in any way then i'm glad. and just like any other reading you find, take what resonates and leave what doesn't }

❆ take a deep breath... and choose the pile you're most drawn to...

✿ PILE ONE ⋰˚☆

KEYWORDS/SIGNS: rain, orange slices, pie, hot tea, 777, gloomy weather, allergies, ears ringing, dogs barking/whining, 222, trust, hourglass, boredom, keys, heart ache, homesick, road trips, four leaf clover, golden child, shaking hands

❆ a decision, a choice. is this right? am i making the wrong choice? let’s take a deep breath ok? it seems you are at a crossroads of sorts. perhaps you don’t know what to do with yourself when it comes to your shifting journey. that’s ok! whatever this issue is for you specifically, i believe you already have they answer. let’s slow the roll, take some deep breaths and try to see this clearly. to me it seems you are over consuming information. i suggest you log off of social media for a bit, sit with yourself and look over the information you already have, discard what no longer fits you and keep what works. you know you best! some random person online cannot (unfortunately) fix your supposed problems for you. no matter how much advice you seek, you can only do that. you need to let go of this internal struggle, you are only fighting yourself, creating resistance. if the answers still seem to be foggy to you, perhaps you can meditate and look for the answers there.

❆ it seems your mind might be in the midst of chaos, or perhaps your life is as well. yet when it comes to your shifting journey you may just be on the brink of a spiritual awakening you desire (or need). the clarity is within YOU. it looks like you are walking down this path with a blindfold on, unsure of where you are going, what choices to make. maybe there is something you don’t want to face. but these fears and worries do not need to hold you back. let’s try to use them to your advantage. face what is holding you back and if you just can’t rid it, know that it does not stop you, only shows a different part of yourself.

❆ instead of putting your journey and motivations on others, it’s time to look within. there’s only so much more “new” information you can gain. your journey is yours and yours alone. that doesn’t mean it has to be a lonely one though. trust that you have the answers, and trust that there is still a community for you! having so many different pieces of information and advice forced upon you to try and digest and make use of is not helping you. sit with yourself and ask yourself if there is genuinely anything you still need to learn from others at this point? at what point do you let it all go and just use it to your benefit?

❆ maybe creating some sort of routine will help you as well, setting up some self-discipline. on the flip side you may need to let go of perfectionism as well. you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. shifting is supposed to be fun. maybe reflect on what you can do to make this all the more enjoyable. let go of the process and remember where you started.

SONGS ✧

‧ ₊ escaper - sarah kinsley

“ everything changed

but my mind couldn’t change me ”

‧ ₊ wildflower - beach house

“ need a companion…

a hidden prayer

you know your not losing your mind

what’s left, you make something of it ”

‧ ₊ eye contact - fromis_9

“ When I closed my eyes and felt it, there was a small gap between you and me

I want to see you again, I want you so…

When you look at me, the moment I started believing in eternity

When I look at you, it was possible because of you ”

METHOD SUGGESTION ✧

{ remember you don't need a method! }

‧ ₊ void/pure conscious

‧ ₊ julia method

✿ PILE TWO ⋰˚☆

KEYWORDS/SIGNS: waterfalls, cinnamon, 444, crows, 88, water damage. doubles, holiday, patience, crowns, one of a kind, eye on the prize, chocolate cake, stars

❆ let’s take a moment to give yourself a pat on the back! give yourself space to celebrate your accomplishments, big or small, bright or dim. it’s ok to reflect and give yourself credit for all you’ve done, someone has to, and you deserve it. you are at a place of harmony and balance in your journey. embrace it! know that you already have it, and if necessary take a breather, pause and look around yourself. look at all you’ve achieved! it will still be here for you, even if you take a break from it all. whether it’s here or in your desired reality, you are surrounded by so much love and support. even on your worst days. your vision is clear, if you're ready, know that it is yours, and make that first step. perhaps all you need is a little reassurance, you got this!

❆ you’ve clearly invested a lot into yourself and your journey. your hard work will pay off, you just need to sit back and let it. perhaps you are confused over slow results. yet you should persist, for it is already yours. stay in a mindset of gratefulness, if needed share your feelings with someone, talk it out.

❆ stay steady and clear, you are on the right path. if victory is what you want, victory is what you’ll get. you are just on the verge of making a breakthrough. keep going. embrace all your ideas and write them down. let yourself create your vision, live in that moment. your creativity is your strength. you may be overwhelmed with the excitement, all the possibilities. harness it and let it push you further. it is all up to you.

SONGS ✧

‧ ₊ mariners apartment complex - lana del rey

“ i ain’t no candle in the wind

i’m the board, the lighting, the thunder…

they mistook my kindness for weakness ”

‧ ₊ numb - men i trust

“ please forgive me if i ever did you wrong

i’ll be your candle; burn me upside down ”

‧ ₊ moon song - beabadoobee

“ i’m lying on the moon

my dear, i’ll be there soon

it’s a quiet and starry place

time’s we’re swallowed up

in space we’re a million miles away ”

METHOD SUGGESTION ✧

{ remember you don't need a method! }

‧ ₊ intention

‧ ₊ lucid dreaming

✿ PILE TWO ⋰˚☆

KEYWORDS/SIGNS: love, pairing, 555, daydream, interruptions, cats, heartbreak, lonesome, tears, sleeping in, not sleeping enough, castles, cages, 333, 1212, floating

❆ it has been a long journey for you, a hard one at that. you may have found yourself in many setbacks. perhaps you blame yourself, there’s a lot of sadness and anger here. in this moment you can choose forgiveness, forgive yourself and know that it’s all ok. whatever has happened, there’s no use for guilt. open up to a friend, a stranger, someone. vocalize your feelings and hardships. with mistakes you can learn and grow from them, and ultimately come out stronger in the end. show yourself grace and love, and set your eyes on newer and better things. know that no matter what you can still trust yourself. take small steps and build yourself back up. find the romance and beauty in shifting again, it’ll always be there.

❆ i see that you may be someone shifting for love. keep your partner in mind. despite everything, please remember you are deserving of love and happiness. keep your love close to you. just as you wish to be with them, use it to bring you two together. your emotions are not a flaw, feel them, sit with them, BE them. wherever you are and where you want to be, what are you feeling? are you in your bed? perhaps the arms of your lover. whoever you want to be, FEEL IT, let your compassion drive you forward. there’s no need to be embarrassed over your feelings, they are valid, and so are you.

❆ you need to make the decision. you can’t sit in despair forever, pick yourself up and know that there are better things for you. use it all to your advantage, all the bad just as the good. being interrupted during a meditation? that’s fine, it doesn’t have to stop you forever. Distracted? that’s ok, take a deep breath and know that it doesn’t have to hold you back, unless you let it. you don't have to have the most squeaky clean mindset ever to shift, that doesn’t make a whole lot of sense does it? accept where you are at, and accept where you want to go.

SONGS ✧

‧ ₊ whale - kim sejeong

“ i find you hidden in the dark night sky

when i walk on the purple road among the clouds

Can I face you only at the end of the darkness?…

Where did you disappear

i miss my whale…

time has become today in front of you ”

‧ ₊ high - slow pulp

“ i have to much in my pockets

i wish they were empty…

my limbs are feeling lazy

why won’t they work with me?

and now i can’t seem to focus my eyes

won’t let me see ”

‧ ₊ sweet nothing - taylor swift

“ they said the end is comin’,

everyone’s up to somethin’

i find myself runnin’ home to your sweet nothings…

to you, i can admit that i'm just to soft for all of it ”

METHOD SUGGESTION ✧

{ remember you don't need a method! }

‧ ₊ fives senses

‧ ₊ staircase method

‧ ₊ wake back to bed

[rebeltarot]

FORECAST ➕ Your 2024

Your reblogs are highly appreciated. Thank you so much for supporting my work!

[3 piles] ・ [3 decks] ・ [8 cards for each pile] ・ [letters, signs, messages, songs]

Hello friends! How insane that we are almost at the end of 2023. How has this year been treating you, and what are you looking forward to in 2024? Definitely let me know. I am so excited for this new year which is why I decided to create a reading all about what 2024 has in store for you. Enjoy. <3

Painting: The Birth of Venus - Alexandre Cabanel (1875)

Helpful Links: How to choose your pile ➕ Request a reading

Your reblogs are highly appreciated. Thank you so much for supporting my work!

© rebeltarot 2023 - all rights reserved ・ do not steal, copy, change, or redistribute my content.

PILE 01 ➕

Disclaimer: All Tarot readings on this blog are meant for entertainment purposes only. My Pick-a-card readings are based on my knowledge of the tarot and my intuition. Tarot is a divination tool and should not be considered a replacement for medical or professional guidance. It is not intended to be used as such, and any choices made in response to my readings are your own responsibility. All interpretations are speculative, and whether you believe in it is your choice. Readings are for self-reflection purposes only; take what resonates, and leave the rest. My readings are timeless unless stated otherwise.

CONFIRMATION

Signs and confirmation that this is your pile. This can be anything from your initials, astrological placements, significant messages or signs, places, songs, etc. Please use your discernment.

14:14, E, E, L, N, Good news in two weeks, Big, Like a thief in the night you stole my heart and called me yours, Empowerment, You got me painting pictures in my head, Wherever you go - go with all your heart, July, Cancer, Leo, 2, 9, 16, 23, 30

Life path or personal year number: 6, 5, 2

Song: My Power - CHIKA

YOUR 2024

Tarot: 6 of wands (Challenge Winner), King of cups (The Single Dad), 2 of pentacles (Final Two), 2 of Cups (Cheers)

Oracle: Socks, (Community), The Pillar, (Manifest)

Hello, Pile 01, and welcome to your reading. How has this year been treating you, and what are you looking forward to in 2024? Wow, we are starting with an amazing card: the 6 of wands. In 2024, you will experience success and public recognition. Something that you have been working towards and desiring to achieve will make a lot of progress, moving you toward the finish line. You will be celebrated by your surroundings and the people in your life, and I do feel like this win will lead to you having more confidence. The Final Rose deck that I am using for this reading also has additional keywords on its cards; in this case, it reads Challenge Winner. You will achieve something that was not easy, but you were passionate about it. You will be recognized for it not just by those around you but also by yourself. The King of Cups is our next card, and it reads: The single dad. You will meet a new person in 2024. This could be a father figure or just a figure of authority in your life. Someone who is guiding you through your journey. This could be someone who has achieved something on their own and is now teaching you to do the same with knowledge, intelligence, and a lot of compassion. This person seems devoted to either you personally or your cause. For some of you, you might be starting something new. We have a child standing on their dad's feet, and he is guiding the way. It feels like whatever you are starting or birthing in 2024 will be supported and guided by a benefactor. Someone who has already forged the path and is willing to guide you and help you balance your heart and your head. In 2024, you will have multiple priorities in life, and you will be improving your time management. Your resourcefulness will be key during the upcoming year, and it will help you adapt to whatever situations may come your way. It's so interesting because the King of Cups has talked about balancing your head and your heart, and the 2 of pentacles confirm just that. You might be making impactful decisions in 2024. Your bottom deck is the 2 of cups. Two figures are toasting to each other with a glass of bubbly. Again, there is a lot to celebrate, and this King of Cups person seems to play a big role in terms of you achieving your goals. This could simply be about a supporter with similar goals and interests, or it could be a romantic relationship and a partner who supports you and cheers you on. Take it, however, it resonates. Either way, love will play a role in 2024 as well, as it draws through your entire reading with it being your bottom deck, aka your underlying energy. I am so happy for you, pile 1. You will experience a lot of wins, and there will be multiple reasons for you to celebrate.

Your first oracle card is the socks card, and it talks about being cozy and introspection. Funnily, it made me think of the Beyonce song 'Cozy' which essentially talks about being cozy with oneself. You might want to give it a listen. I do think that you will be comfortable with who you are and who you are becoming in 2024, but do not let your comfort stop you from experiencing yourself and the world around you. Community will play a huge role in your coming year, especially this King of Cups person, as it sits above the community card in your spread. Partnerships in general are a big topic, be it professional, business, friendship, romantic partnership, or even all. You will come to find out the significance of 1:1 connections. Next, we have the pillar, which lets me know that you will build a strong foundation in the coming year, one that will support you through the years to come. This obviously relates to the community you are building, but it might also relate to the decisions you are making throughout the next year. It seems significant, and with the manifest card being the bottom deck here, it also heavily relates to your goals and your wishes. So overall, you will be laying the foundations for your manifestations to arrive in your life. This is such a wonderful reading. May you have a very blessed 2024! I would love to hear what you are excited about and what your goals are for the coming year. ♡♡

Your reblogs are highly appreciated. Thank you so much for supporting my work!

© rebeltarot 2023 - all rights reserved ・ do not steal, copy, change, or redistribute my content.

PILE 02 ➕

Disclaimer: All Tarot readings on this blog are meant for entertainment purposes only. My Pick-a-card readings are based on my knowledge of the tarot and my intuition. Tarot is a divination tool and should not be considered a replacement for medical or professional guidance. It is not intended to be used as such, and any choices made in response to my readings are your own responsibility. All interpretations are speculative, and whether you believe in it is your choice. Readings are for self-reflection purposes only; take what resonates, and leave the rest. My readings are timeless unless stated otherwise.

CONFIRMATION

Signs and confirmation that this is your pile. This can be anything from your initials, astrological placements, significant messages or signs, places, songs, etc. Please use your discernment.

C, I, G, T, Friday, Toxic, Gamine, Winter, Passionate, Younger, Christmas isn't a season - it's a feeling, June, Gemini, Cancer, 4, 11, 18, 25

Life path or personal year number: 5, 9, 2

Song: VKTM - SICKOTOY, INNA

YOUR 2024

Tarot: 5 of swords (Tattletale), The Hierophant (The Host), The Moon, Page of Swords (The Gossip)

Oracle: Frozen, Free Will, Death, Paradox

Hello, Pile 02, and welcome to your reading. How has this year been treating you, and what are you looking forward to in 2024? In 2024, you will find out who your real friends are. There might be some conflict and some arguments that you will have to deal with; however, it will allow you to get rid of people who bully and intimidate you. This hostility is something you have carried over from this year. These people that we are talking about here are people who judge you for the things you love and for what you stand for. They are unhappy and are therefore projecting this energy onto you. With two major Arcana cards showing up, it feels like a significant year. One in which you will discover your values and your morals. You will reflect on traditions, weed out what doesn't align with you, and keep the things that bring you joy. It's a year of spiritual wisdom as well as learning and education. The moon card confirms that you will discover something—some sort of truth—that will disillusion you and that will help you face your fears and your anxiety. Funnily enough, in this deck, there is a dancing couple on the moon card, and again, the hierophant is represented by a host. I do think that you will be open to whatever lessons are coming toward you. Whatever the moon card will unveil, it will be a blessing for you and will lead to a lot of magical moments. Your bottom deck is the page of swords with the keyword gossip. There is someone in your life who has negatively influenced you—someone who loves to gossip about things but equally gossips about you to others. I feel like this is a person who is curious and prying, and this someone rarely has good intentions when sharing personal information or judging other people. This could be someone younger than you and who might be an air sign (Libra, Aquarius, and Gemini; Sagittarius also came to mind).

We have the frozen card as your first oracle. It reads as follows: "Someone or something in this situation has gone cold. Some things are meant to remain in a state of winter; others can thaw out and be brought back to life again." This challenge card is sitting below the 5 of swords. I do think some of you will cut contact with this person or these people, and others will resolve this issue and start afresh with said people. Either way, it won't be easy, and it will lead to uncomfortable conversations, but with the free will card, we can see that eventually, everything is your choice. You decide how this will end and whether there is something to salvage. You have to make a decision, though, because the status quo is not meant to be carried over into 2025; it has to be dealt with in 2024. Next, we have the death card, which talks about change as well as the ending of a cycle. Changes are coming towards you and an exciting new beginning and experience. Some things will come to an end. It does not only have to relate to the person but also to your mindset and negative thought patterns. You will clean the house in 2024, giving yourself a fresh start. The paradox card is our final card. It made me think of the saying "the beginning of the end," which in itself is a paradox, no? But if we shift our perspective and consider an end as something that happens over multiple instances or chapters, then the meaning of the saying becomes clear. I do think that, essentially, you will learn that endings can be a good thing and that death and rebirth can be exciting and something you look forward to. This year might have two sides of the coin for you. And when you think you have lost or experienced something bad, you will soon realize that it was a blessing for you. It's a year full of change and growth for you, and you will come out of it wiser and stronger. I am so excited to hear your thoughts on your reading. What are your plans for 2024, and what are the goals you've set for the upcoming year?

Your reblogs are highly appreciated. Thank you so much for supporting my work!

© rebeltarot 2023 - all rights reserved ・ do not steal, copy, change, or redistribute my content.

PILE 03 ➕

Disclaimer: All Tarot readings on this blog are meant for entertainment purposes only. My Pick-a-card readings are based on my knowledge of the tarot and my intuition. Tarot is a divination tool and should not be considered a replacement for medical or professional guidance. It is not intended to be used as such, and any choices made in response to my readings are your own responsibility. All interpretations are speculative, and whether you believe in it is your choice. Readings are for self-reflection purposes only; take what resonates, and leave the rest. My readings are timeless unless stated otherwise.

CONFIRMATION

Signs and confirmation that this is your pile. This can be anything from your initials, astrological placements, significant messages or signs, places, songs, etc. Please use your discernment.

A, I, B, blank, Look out for trouble within a few days, Your next love affair will surprise you, Do you want me the way I want you?, Don't forget to be awesome, February, Aquarius, Pisces, 5, 12, 19, 26

Life path or personal year number: 9, 3, 6, 1

Song: I am - Jim Jones, Hitmaka, Stefflon Don

YOUR 2024

Tarot: The Hermit (ITM), The Hanged Man (The Cliffhanger), 6 of cups (Butterflies), 10 of pentacles (Hometowns)

Oracle: Socks, Maze, Dare to Dream, Self-Love

Hello, Pile 03, and welcome to your reading. How has this year been treating you, and what are you looking forward to in 2024? The hermit is your first card, and I love this energy for you. In 2024, you will go within and discover that you possess an intrinsic value. It's a year of discovering your self-worth and practicing self-love. You will be seeking out your own company more, getting to know yourself, and gathering as well as honoring your internal wisdom. The hanged man is reaffirming this message. The way you look at yourself and your worth will change and shift into a perspective of acceptance and appreciation. I do think that for most of you, this is a journey that you have already embarked on and that you will continue in 2024. I do feel that you will graduate in this area in 2024. The 6 of cups relate to childhood memories, innocence, joy, goodwill, and sometimes nostalgia. In this deck, it relates to butterflies. You will have a glow-up this year, both internal and external. You will graduate from your old mindsets and your old ways of being and seeing the world. Whatever perspectives dictated your life before 2024 will be overcome during the next year, and it will be a process that ultimately leads to freedom. Most of you will heal old wounds and old negative mindsets, and I do think that there will be a newfound appreciation for your inner child and your childhood as a whole. The 10 of pentacles confirm that you are ending a cycle successfully and starting a brand new one. Some of you may be returning to your hometowns; others might be leaving them. Either way, I do feel like in 2024 you will reflect a lot about your past as well as past connections and experiences. Family, be it by blood or by choice, will be a source of support for you during the end of this cycle. You might even consider or reflect on different traditions that you want to continue or let go of. This is a prosperous year for you, one of windfalls and abundance.

The sock card lets us know that you will be comfortable, not just overall but especially in your skin. You will be able to sit with yourself even if it's uncomfortable, or rather, especially when it is. What you will find out is that you can rely on yourself and that you are the last person who will ever abandon you again. It's a big year of introspection and getting to know oneself. However, make sure that you do not get too cozy and shut out the entire world. Solitude is important, but balance is key. The maze card is next, and it talks about a choice. I feel like something that was put on hold is coming back up again in 2024, and a choice has to be made to move forward. You might have been stuck in a certain area of life; however, you will find the puzzle piece that is missing, helping you to move forward. Next, we have the 'dare to dream' card, and I love that it sits below the 6 of cups. You will break through any barriers or boundaries that have kept you small and confined, and you will allow yourself to live authentically. You are going for the big dreams and the big goals this year. You allow yourself to take up the space needed, and you say yes to yourself, your dreams, and your goals. In combination with the self-love card, it's a blessed and prosperous prediction. You will find pride in yourself, and you will have reasons to be proud of who you are and who you are becoming. Your year is filled with a lot of elements that will fill your cup. I hope you have the best year ever. Let me know your thoughts about this reading and what your big plans are for 2024. Have a blessed year. <3

Your reblogs are highly appreciated. Thank you so much for supporting my work!

© rebeltarot 2023 - all rights reserved ・ do not steal, copy, change, or redistribute my content.

[thatfeelinwhenyou]

KINDRED — 33

It’s your final year of highschool, and your only goal is to graduate top of your cohort, as usual. Except as student council president, your advisor can’t seem to leave you alone. What happens when you take Decelis Academy’s top student, their star athlete and put them in front of a camera?

smau + written (5.1k words 💀)

❥･• episode 33 — the bane of my existence

The ceiling of your room is adorned with handwritten notes of keywords you were supposed to memorise for your mid-terms. The notes are large enough for you to easily read them, especially as you lie flat on your back on the bed, as you are now. Throughout the term, you had gradually covered the ceiling with these notes, dedicating the last two weeks before the exam to repeating them over and over again in your head as you drifted off to sleep.

Despite the exams being over, you have yet to take them down to be replaced by new notes you’d be curating for the new term. With nothing but time, you find yourself spending hours staring at the section dedicated to your English Literature notes, wondering why you never noticed it. You can't help but reflect on the 30 minutes before bed that you could have spent memorising the highlighted words. Perhaps then, you wouldn't have fumbled so hard in the vocabulary section, and you wouldn't be in your current predicament—separated from your friends, from Jungwon, forced to skip your own farewell party, and school itself.

You never expected your mother to willingly let you stay home, especially during your final semester at Decelis Academy. You thought she'd prefer you practically living in school. On what grounds did she choose to ground you? Because you ended up second on the scoreboard? That’s bullshit.

As a matter of fact, it seems counterintuitive for her to keep you at home for self-study as a disciplinary action. The situation is baffling to you—as a senior in high school with less than three months left until finals, it doesn't make sense that you're wasting time at home instead of being in school.

In truth, your mother is perplexed, even a bit terrified. But what exactly is she terrified of?

Change, that’s what.

Changes that manifested after Jungwon came into your life. How, instead of returning home late from the library after a long revision session, you now return late after spending the entire day with him. He’s a constant presence; waiting at your gateway, observing as you consciously stroll down the gravel to your doorstep, turning back to thank him for walking you home and bidding him goodbye.

Moreover, you divert your attention from your own studies, putting in extra effort to tutor him so he could compete in his upcoming competition. Instead of sharing the events of your day with your mother, you find yourself engrossed in texting him at the dinner table—something you’ve never dared to do before. She would nag at you over the smallest details, and you no longer quietly listen even if you are in the right, but rather engage by talking back, defending, or justifying yourself.

As a consequence, you've shifted from being at the top of the pyramid to now occupying the second position, trailing behind a library secretary. Yet, it seems like these changes haven't affected you in the slightest.

It feels as though you are finally managing to form your own opinions and make your own decisions. It's as if you no longer need her.

These changes, this departure from the routine she had come to expect, terrifies your mother. The fear of losing the daughter she thought she knew, the fear of a new chapter that doesn’t align with the plans she had envisioned, leaves her bewildered and uneasy.

When she looks at you, she sees a reflection of herself from years ago when she was a student. She recalls the time she met your father, fell in love, and sacrificed her dreams to follow his path and have you, only for him to later abandon both of you to pursue his own endeavours.

So, the mere thought of you, broken and lonely after what she assumes will be Jungwon eventually leaving you, intensifies her hatred for him. The déjà vu becomes too real, and she firmly believes she's doing what's best for you, even if you end up resenting her for it.

At some point, you started living your life for your mother rather than yourself, and you're aware of this subconsciously—the paradox of being both the subject and object in her pursuit of validation. Even then, it’s hard to let go of everything you once believed in altogether.

No, rather, you want to believe it's true. You want to believe your mother is right, and the status quo she has set for you is genuinely for the best:

Your goal is to enter an elite local university.

You aspire to be a doctor.

Mother is not controlling.

You don't need a man to validate your worth.

Which seem rather ironic as you contemplate how, essentially, you are a pawn in your mother’s subconscious quest to prove your father wrong about her. Her motives, however well-intentioned, have inadvertently moulded your path.

It's a narrative in which she’s determined to show that even in his absence, your mother is fully capable of nurturing a child, specifically her child. The belief embedded in her actions is that one day, you will emerge successful, surpassing what she might have achieved had she chosen to pursue her own dreams back then. This belief, however, unravels into a conundrum because, if your mother could turn back time and choose a different path, you wouldn’t be here.

As these thoughts weigh heavily on your mind, you find yourself truly overthinking it. You sit up on the bed, your body leaning against the frame, and your surroundings seem to echo with the gravity of your contemplation.

It's barely past 10 in the morning, and you can't help but wonder about the mundane yet comforting routines of your friends. Beomgyu is probably relieved that Chemistry is over, recalling him perpetually complaining about having the subject for their first period. Chanelle and Yunjin are likely engaged in their usual ritual of placing bets on the lunch menu. Gyuvin is probably sleeping again, and Riki is likely disturbing some poor kid by launching staple bullets from the back of the room.

And then there's Jungwon, perhaps experiencing a quiet sense of relief at your absence, no longer subjected to reminders to pay attention or being shaken awake just as he teeters on the edge of drifting off into dreamland. The vivid details of their potential activities form a contrast to the complex musings clouding your thoughts.

The room, once a sanctuary, now bears the weight of aching tensions. With a sigh, you rise from your bed, a restless energy propelling you forward. Just then, you hear a slight knock against your window.

Wait, your room is on the second floor; what could be banging against it?

Tok. There it is again. The sound echoes throughout your room. You approach the window ledge with apprehension, visibly flinching as a small rock flies towards you, knocking against the glass that separates you from the tiny projectile.

Determined to catch who is disturbing your peace on this calm Friday morning, you march up to your window frame, planning to give whoever it is a piece of your mind. Your gaze follows the direction from where the stone came, and to your surprise, you see Jungwon excitedly waving towards you from behind the giant tree in your front yard.

As you open the window, the sounds and sights of the outside world flood in. The pre-winter morning sun casts a warm glow on the scene, highlighting the details of the landscape outside. The gentle rustle of leaves, distant chirping of birds, and the distant hum of the town come together in a natural symphony of morning sounds. The tranquil scene outside your room stands in opposition to the turmoil within, amplifying the surreal nature of the moment. It's really him.

"Hey! Sorry for the wake-up call. Come on down; I wanna bring you somewhere.” Jungwon’s voice rises above the ambient noise.

“What are you doing here?! Aren’t you supposed to be in school right now?” You attempt to raise your voice just enough, afraid that your mother would overhear.

“I was, until I realised how boring it is without you nagging at me every five seconds. So, I thought I'd bring a little adventure to your day.” The spontaneity of the gesture catches you off guard, momentarily eclipsing the complexities of your internal monologues.

Being deprived of any form of human interaction left you craving, and for a second, you almost accept his proposal without thinking.

“I can’t leave, Won. I’m grounded; my mom is going to kill me if she finds out.”

"Then we'll make sure she doesn't. You'll be back before you even know it, Y/N." The idea is tempting, yes, but you are also unsure if you are ready to face the consequences if, for some reason, things do not go the way you want them to (as always).

"I skipped class for this. I think it shows how much I really miss spending time with you, Y/N."

"As if you never skipped class before we started filming for the documentary." Jungwon sheepishly smiles and subconsciously rubs the back of his neck. The memories of those carefree days filming the documentary flood back, adding a nostalgic touch to the present moment.

You were about to decline for the second time when he skilfully pulls out those cat eyes that you dearly admired. Those captivating eyes that Jungwon knows you can never say "no" to. It's the only efficient method he remembers using to convince you to watch a movie with him everytime he wanted to get out of your long study sessions.

And he's right; those cat eyes works like a damn charm. Because you are now desperately climbing out your window, clinging for dear life against the rusty pipes. As you navigate the unconventional escape route, Jungwon tries hard to suppress his laughter, not wanting to discourage you.

As your feet touch the ground, you become acutely aware of the brisk chill in the air, a stark contrast to the period spent locked up in your makeshift jail cell. Only when you stand before the boy do you fully realise how cold the weather has gotten since the last time you saw him. And unlike Jungwon, who is covered from head to toe, you find yourself in just trousers and an oversized t-shirt.

Promptly, he detects the tiny hairs on your arms standing, and without a moment's hesitation, Jungwon removes his padded jacket, swirling it around your shoulders, instantly enveloping you in warmth.

But It's not just the jacket; it's the proximity of Jungwon that warms you up, his closeness palpable as he adjusts the padding to sit perfectly on the blades of your shoulders. You can practically feel his breath on your neck as he fusses with the collar.

As he fidgets with the article of clothing, Jungwon's actions appear purposeful, yet in reality, he is merely using it as an excuse to draw even closer to you. But he’s not the only one taking advantage of the moment, though, as you seize the opportunity to embrace him. Your arms winding around his waist beneath his uniform blazer and you softly whisper a grateful "Thank you," eliciting a subtle shiver that courses down his spine.

"For what? I’m only lending it to you, you already have a few of my hoodies stocked up. Which reminds me, when are you returning them?" You pinch his sides playfully, and he flinches, the playful exchange bringing the two of you even closer. As if there were any more space between you in the first place.

“I’ll return them back to you, soon. But that’s not what I was referring to.”

“Then, you’re grateful for… making you climb down some rusty-ass pipes?”

"No, you idiot. Thank you for coming to see me. I missed you, really, more than you think. You have no idea how close I was to just running over to you.” The emotions from having the opportunities to spend time with the boy ripped away from you must have been stronger than you thought for those words to come out of you like that. Jungwon senses this, and you feel him tighten around the frame of your body.

"Then, it’s a good thing that I ran over here first.”Jungwon gently pushes you away with a heavy heart. Moving away the few strands of hair stuck onto your cheeks that are turning a shade of rosy pink, most likely from the cold (or not).

The pace picks up again as he locates the palm of your hand, intertwining his fingers with yours,“Let's get out of here before your mom finds us." Luckily for the two of you, you manage to get away with your secret rendezvous, at least for now, and you can only pray that it stays this way.

The world beyond your little bubble beckons, but in this moment, the connection between you and Jungwon feels like the only reality that matters.

Time with Jungwon feels like a pocket universe where seconds slip away unnoticed. Before you know it, the sun slowly begins to dip beyond the horizon, ushering in the cool embrace of the evening air and casting a gentle twilight glow upon the buildings.

The Friday night air is crisp, and the streets come alive with the vibrant energy of the neighbourhood transitioning into its nocturnal rhythm. Jungwon confidently navigates through hidden shortcuts and familiar alleys, the lively sounds of people and distant music replacing the lingering heaviness from your room.

As you walk leisurely through the dimly lit streets, Jungwon animatedly shares anecdotes, laughter, and stories of incidents that unfolded in school during your absence. The glow of street lamps casts a warm ambiance, highlighting the joy in his eyes as he recounts the tales. You are not only relieved to hear that your friends are working hard, but also reassured that the council is thriving under Gunwook's leadership—a responsibility you earnestly insisted on passing down to him.

Eventually, you find yourselves at a serene bench overlooking the river. In the distance, you spot couples on little boats doing whatever couples do on little boats. The two of you sit in a contemplative silence, not awkward, but a kind of loud silence filled with unspoken words—where there is so much to say, but neither of you knows where to start.

Breaking the quietude, Jungwon eagerly rummages through his bag. Curious, you sneak a peek, and a soft giggle escapes your lips at the unconventional contents within. Instead of the expected textbooks, you see a stash of your favourite gummies and an abundance of pencils, which explains why he always has spares on hand whenever you ask for one.

You also spot your fall gloves that you had momentarily forgotten about until now. You recall leaving them with him when it got too uncomfortable for you to wear, and the memory of him playfully nagging you to put them back on, complete with a cute pout when you refused, brings a fond smile to your face.

It’s a touching realisation when you see these tangible tokens. It’s as if little bits and pieces of you and your habits are slowly finding a place in Jungwon’s life. His world, once dominated by Taekwondo, effortlessly accommodates you and the fragments of your existence, just as he seamlessly wove himself into the fabric of your life, which was once burdened with the heavy expectations of achieving stellar grades.

“People might think this is my bag that you’re carrying,” you remark, your tone playful.

"With the amount of things that are yours in here, it might as well be," Jungwon replies, laughter dancing in his warm gaze. He pulls out a hot pack, rubs it between his hands, and extends it to you—another subtle gesture that unleashes an entire zoo inside your stomach. The gentle warmth of the hot pack mirrors the blossoming warmth within as you mumble a quiet “Thank you”.

"Can't believe we'll be graduating soon; it still hasn't hit me just yet," Jungwon says, his voice carrying a tinge of absentminded reflection.

"Believe it or not, sooner or later, reality will come crashing down on you like a meteorite," you jest, attempting to lighten the sudden solemnity of the mood that has settled between you.

"Yeah, then you'll be off to a great local uni, and I'll probably get into the youth Olympics team. Who knows when our paths will cross again?" You turn to look at him, finding his gaze locked onto the calm waters of the river, though you suspect his mind must be anything but calm, straying far from the placid surface of the water.

"I thought we agreed to remain close even after the documentary? You're speaking as if we'll never see each other again," you remark, shuffling closer to him on the bench. The fluttering of your heart intensifies as the skin of your arms comes into contact with his. The connection between you, both physical and emotional, echoes the desire to linger in each other's presence despite the uncertain paths that lie ahead.

"At first, it really was a nightmare having to be around you everywhere," he confesses, leaning forward, his fingers lightly gripping the edge of the bench as he reflects. A tiny pout forms on his thinking face, and you can't help but coo at the endearing sight—a habit you discovered and cherished as you got to know him.

"I don't know if I should be finding that offensive or not," you retort and Jungwon laughs lowly, the husky tone of his voice sending subtle shivers down the back of your neck. "That's why I used 'at first,' idiot."

"But now, I guess it's not that bad to have you around sometimes," he shrugs, attempting to play it cool while ignoring the fact that his heart is pounding relentlessly against his chest.

"Only 'not that bad'? I'm disappointed," you tease, a mischievous sparkle in your eye.

The night envelops both of you in a quiet embrace, the air thick with unexpressed emotions. Jungwon's eyes, once fixed on the distant river, now meet yours. Only this time, there's a vulnerability in his gaze, a silent admission of something more complicated.

"You know," he begins, his voice softer now, carrying a weight of sincerity, "it took me a while to figure out why your presence felt like a storm at first—chaotic and unpredictable. But now, I realise it's more like the calm after the storm. The kind that leaves everything refreshed and new."

Your heart skips a beat at his words, the gravity of his confession sinking in. The atmosphere seems to hold its breath, each passing moment brimming with anticipation as you almost impatiently wait for him to phrase his next words, watching the thoughts flicker across his face as he carefully composed the sentiments in his mind.

"I never expected you to become this important to me," Jungwon continues, his eyes reflecting a mixture of emotions. "But now, imagining my life without you feels like trying to picture a world without sunlight. It's just not the same."

A warm breeze rustles the leaves above, and if there were some stranger watching you right now, you probably wouldn’t even have noticed as you slowly tuned the world around you out. On the contrary, you're acutely aware of the shared space between you on the bench, the closeness that has become second nature.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is... I like having you around. A lot more than 'not that bad,'" he confesses, a shy smile playing on his lips.

Your heart swells with a rush of emotions, and you sense the urgency to respond. "Jungwon, I—" But before you can complete your response, his fingers gently find their way to yours, intertwining them in a silent gesture, as if he's saying you don't owe him anything.

But no, you do owe him everything. You owe him for coming into your mundane excuse of a life and allowing you to realise that sometimes, breaking away from routine is the first step towards discovering your own narrative.

Thus, a smile mirrors his on your face as you say, “I can’t let you say all the cool things yourself. I wanna be cool too.” Jungwon scoffs and you feel his grip on your hand tighten.

"Go on, I'd like to see you try," he challenges, a subtle glint of encouragement in his gaze, knowing you're not one to shy away.

Taking in a deep breath, you confidently look into his eyes as you say what has been on your mind. “Thank you for changing my life, and I don’t ever want to lose you, Yang Jungwon.”

As the echoes of your confession linger in the night air, both of you become aware of the tangible shift in the atmosphere—something profound has unfolded between you. The moonlight paints a soft glow on Jungwon's face, emphasising the earnestness in his eyes, as they remain locked onto yours. The touch of his fingers on yours warms up your skin, a comforting sensation that surpasses any heat pack he could ever give you.

“Okay maybe that wasn’t very cool after all… I just never thought a simple change in routine could lead to all this." You muse, your voice carrying a mixture of awe and gratitude.

"Life has a funny way of surprising us, doesn't it?" Jungwon responds with a playful twinkle in his eyes.

You nod, smiling genuinely. "And I wouldn't have it any other way."

As you sit on the bench, hands still entwined, there's a gentle pause—a moment suspended in time, as if the universe itself is waiting. The world around you, once ordinary, now feels touched by a magical essence, and the stars above seem to glitter with the promise of a future written in a language only both of you understand.

Jungwon leans in, and you can feel the beating of his heart aligning with yours, the soft warmth of his breath as he closes the gap between you. The scent of the night air, infused with a hint of his cologne, adds to the sensory symphony. His lips meet yours in a tender, unhurried motion. It’s a kiss that carries the weight of the world’s expectations on the both of you, only for it to melt away as he smiles against your lips.

Time seems to stand still as you savour the softness of the moment, the warmth of his touch resonating through every fibre of your being. As you sit there, wrapped in the warmth of his lips on yours, the world feels limitless, and the journey ahead, uncertain but exciting. And as you break apart, breathless but filled with an exhilarating warmth, that’s when you realise you have finally come to terms with and chosen to accept your emotions that are now clear to you that it is not borne alone—Yang Jungwon, who was once the bane of your existence, is now the centre of it.

tw! depiction of violence

You smile to yourself as the sweet memory of that magical first kiss plays in your mind like a cherished melody. Your hands remain interlocked with that of Jungwon’s as you walk through the same alley that you came from. The difference being the absence of the vibrant lights of the night market, which had already faded by now, leaving only the soft glow of the moon and the distant street lamps that barely bleed into the alley to guide your way. Yet, you feel safe and protected when you sense Jungwon’s presence beside you.

As you turn a corner, the alley widens, revealing a quieter stretch with fewer distractions. However, just as you start to relax, a familiar voice cuts through the tranquillity.

“Well, well, if it isn’t Y/N. Didn't think we'd run into you two lovebirds tonight. How cute.” Hana's voice, laced with envy, echoes through the alley. She steps into view, flanked by her two loyal lackeys who wear matching smirks.

However, they were not alone as you spot a few familiar faces perched up against the brick wall—they were the same group of boys known to wreak havoc among the underclassmen. You know this having seen their faces in detention multiple times when you were supervising.

You didn’t expect Hana to be hanging around them, it’s like trouble mixing around with even more trouble, a recipe for disaster.

In the dimly lit alley, tension hangs thick in the air as Hana and her lackeys close in, their predatory grins revealing a hunger for confrontation. Jungwon instinctively tightens his grip on your hand, pulling you behind him as he stands his ground, a subtle signal that he's prepared for whatever comes next.

Hana takes a step forward, her voice dripping with malice. “It’s unfortunate really. You skipped a whole week of school; I thought I finally managed to get rid of you, but alas.” Her lackeys snicker, emboldened by their leader's confidence.

You square your shoulders, determined not to let Hana's provocation rattle you. “What’s your problem, Hana?”

Hana's eyes narrow, her jealousy fuelling the fire. "My problem? It's you, Y/N. Always meddling where you don't belong."

In disbelief, you step out of Jungwon’s shadow. “You know what, fuck you. I don’t even remember ever offending you. I also had a really shitty week, and I don’t need you making it worse than it already is, so please just get the fuck out of my face.” The words fly out of your mouth before you can even comprehend, and Jungwon seems to be equally shocked, hearing you curse for the first time. The shock quickly turns into admiration as he smirks at your bold proclamation.

"We're not looking for trouble, Hana. Just let us pass," Jungwon says cautiously, not wanting to provoke Hana any further, but it only seems to rile her up even more.

Hana's frustration mounts, and she takes a step closer to you, invading your personal space. "You think you're so special, Y/N? Jungwon can do so much better than someone like you." The words sting, but you refuse to let her get under your skin. Before you can respond, one of her lackeys makes a move, attempting to grab your arm. Instinctively, Jungwon steps between you and the aggressor, blocking the advance.

Despite their attempts to provoke a reaction, Jungwon remains composed, his experience evidently shining through. The underclassmen, however, aren't as restrained. One of them lunges at Jungwon, but he swiftly sidesteps the attack, using his fast reflexes to evade without retaliating.

However, the group, instigated by their leader's resentment, launch a coordinated attack. One of them goes straight for Jungwon, aiming for his lower abdomen. Despite his fast reflexes, the underclassman manages to land a blow, catching Jungwon off guard.

A sharp pain courses through Jungwon's side as he winces, the surprise attack taking its toll. He stumbles backward, trying to maintain his composure. The underclassmen, emboldened by their success, taunts him. "Looks like your taekwondo skills don't mean much in a real fight, huh?"

You, torn between defending Jungwon and avoiding further escalation, plead with Hana. "This is unnecessary, Hana! We don't want to fight!"

Hana, however, revels in the chaos she's created. This is her way of saying that if she can’t have Jungwon, nobody can—much less lose him to the likes of you.

"You should have thought about that before getting involved with Jungwon." In truth, she never truly liked Jungwon. Just his reputation and the attention she’d get if she managed to crack the academy’s most mysterious boy. Enraged, Hana signals them to continue, escalating the confrontation.

Jungwon, though injured, refuses to retaliate recklessly; something about physical fighting one against a whole group of well-fit boys with a sport designed for self-defense doesn’t seem very smart. Instead, he focuses on defending their attacks, hands wrapped tightly over his head, as he lay cradled on the ground. His determination remains unwavering, but the odds are stacked against him.

The underclassmen, seemingly relentless, taunt Jungwon with malicious glee. "Thought you were tough, huh? Looks like you're nothing even with your precious taekwondo skills."

He shouts for you to run (as if you were about to leave him behind) but you’re forced onto your knees and held in place by her two lackeys. As the scuffle intensifies, the alley echoes with grunts and the shuffle of feet.

The chaos attracts attention, and the distant wail of approaching police sirens grows louder. The approaching alarm prompts Hana and her lackeys to scatter, disappearing into the shadows, leaving behind a battered, bruised and disoriented Jungwon.

As the police car arrives, its flashing lights casting an unsettling glow, you find yourself cradling Jungwon, who is visibly struggling.

“Please tell me you’re okay, Won.” Urgently, you call for an ambulance, realising the severity of his injuries when he could barely reply you.

The journey to the hospital is filled with a heavy silence, broken only by the wail of sirens. Jungwon, laid out on the gurney, appears vulnerable under the harsh hospital lights. His eyes meet yours, conveying gratitude and reassurance amidst the pain. As Jungwon is wheeled into a room for further evaluation, you can't help but reflect on the unexpected turn the night has taken—from stolen kisses to the harsh reality of a hospital emergency room, a scenario straight out of a drama.

The hospital transforms into a surreal space where time seems to both stretch and contract, leaving you suspended in uncertainty. Every passing minute feels like an eternity as you anxiously await any updates on Jungwon's condition.

Your friends, Jungwon’s family, and even his coach start to arrive, having informed them about his condition through Jungwon’s phone that you somehow remembered the passcode to from the last time he told you. The reunion with your friends, especially Chanelle, who runs up to engulf you in a hug, brings a fleeting moment of joy. However, the thought of Jungwon lingers, casting a shadow over the otherwise happy encounter.

Finally, a doctor emerges with updates. Jungwon's injuries are serious, though not life-threatening, requires thorough treatment and a period of recovery. Hearing the news, relief washes over you knowing he will receive the care and medicine he needs. However, your relief is short-lived as the reminder of his upcoming competition the following Saturday floods you with renewed stress.

How can he possibly compete in his current condition? The thought of him being covered in bruises, or worse, questioning if he can even participate at all, weighs heavily on your mind.

The national team coach is going to be there, and Jungwon's entire future hinges on him performing well in that godforsaken competition he worked so hard to compete in.

The unfairness of the situation becomes glaringly evident, casting a shadow over the initial relief. The stress that momentarily lifted now returns with even greater intensity, leaving you grappling with the looming uncertainty of Jungwon's athletic future, and maybe even your own.

prev | masterlist | next

♡。·˚˚· ·˚˚·。♡

authors note: feels like i just wrote a kdrama… as usual i cba to proofread so i apologise yall 🥲

perm taglist. @hajimelvr @s00buwu @urmomssneakylink @grayscorner @bubblytaetae @mrchweeee @artstaeh @sleeping-demons @yuviqik @junsflow @blurryriki @bobabunhee

taglist open! @uuzhanggggggg @jayhoonvroom @en-flirt @missingemobeomgyu @jiawji @ocyeanicc @s7noo @asterizee @nwjws @noascats @yunwonie @saturnmooonxx @enhaz1 @jiaant11 @clairecottenheart @i2lain @miumiuoi @zhounauts @hoey2k @neocockthotology @nanuer @yenqa @ahnneyong @chanhee-hee @yanqiiuver @yujmelon @beomsbeanie @sloobydooburmomjungwon @keiisu @jaeyunniesimp @jiamini @jihanniee @lilriswife4life @i-yeseo

*white = cannot tag