#Keep the universe running right?
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Okay but this fic?! Love this
#helluva boss#Ao3#Fic rec#Which i don't normally do but here we are#vassago#andrealphus#Stolas#Love the idea that 1. Stolas is actually really good at his job#Which you know what I buy i know we mostly see him moping around his palace but consider what if he was actually amazing at his job#Just because we don't see it doesn't mean it's not happening#And love the idea that andrealphus 1. Sucks ass at stolas's job and 2. Is furious that this fucker even had a job in the first place#What do you mean I actually have to work and cannot just bask in rising above my station and spending all of stolas's wealth#All the other demon princes being like hey bud excellent scheme there truly well done. And you're right stolas was always a little weirdo#But do you have the 8 prophecies due this week that we need to do various really fucking important things that keep hell running#I mean you said you were everything stolas was so you know how to coax the stars into telling you things we need to#Keep the universe running right?#Andrealphus never fucking admitting it but internally being like fuckkkkk i didn't know he was important how am I going to learn#All of this shit in 12 fucking hours I might have fucked up here. Need to do a new scheme so I can keep the power but none of the work#Meanwhile vassago losing it in the background because yah they're all supremely fucked but watching this mf fail is great
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please stay by me!
#nintama#nintama rantarou#忍たま乱太郎#rkrn#仙伊#comic#digital#tachibana senzou#zenpouji isaku#HI..............................UMMMM#i haven't drawn in a long while so all of it exploded into me drawing the sappiest comic known to man#(just really wanted to draw that last page)#you two WILL get tender and vulnerable with each other NOW#nhk only gave them like one episode together because they knew the fabric of the universe would be at danger lest they keep putting these#two on screen next to each other. something about seeing chougougumi is so overwhelmingly powerful to me.#like staring directly into the face of a brilliant solar eclipse#i like the idea of senzou running to isaku as kind of a safety net whenever he encounters the genkin trio. its cute...#i had an idea for where he calls isaku a good luck charm. irony right because isakus unlucky but oughh... *clutching chest*....#and i wonder if isaku would look up to senzou ...its so dark in here...#these two would also make great angst i feel bc they both have committee work heavily involved with death on the battlefield...ill refrain#because im running out of tag space but ARHGHHHHH SENZOU ISAKU YURI!!!! ARGHHH#quirinahdraws#issen#just for tag convenience
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Made a FANTASTIC discovery today regarding the meaning behind Boothill's fourth eidolon, I'm so happy!!! Most of it is just cowboy references, like
Eidolon 1: Dusty Trail's Lone Star- cowboy lingo, the Lone Star of Texas
Eidolon 2: Milestonemonger- more cowboy lingo, someone who roams and wanders
Eidolon 3: Marble Orchard's Guard- yet more cowboy lingo, a term for a graveyard (a fave of mine, because for me it evokes the image of a Church Grim <333)
Eidolon 4: Cold Cuts Chef- ????
Google didn't really provide much on Eidolon 4 like for the first three. Before today I had assumed it was just another movie reference of some sort, since Boothill is like entirely based on/inspired by old Western films.
"Cold cuts" are basically lunch meat/deli meat. It's precooked meat that doesn't need any kind of preparation- you can literally just eat it cold. Since it didn't seem to be a movie reference, I thought oh, maybe it's a nod to his lifestyle? Boothill is unhoused and lives on the run from the IPC with little rest, he doesn't really have the means to cook. Precooked, easy food like that would be a godsend for someone in his circumstances.
Anyway the original Chinese text gives it an entirely different, MUCH wilder meaning fjadskljfkld
love how they chose "celebrity chef" to show his expertise and/or fame in this fjkdlsja
Because no, "cold cuts" isn't cowboy lingo for anything, but cold meat specifically is.
It's how you refer to a corpse.
"Cold Cuts Chef" is not a title talking about his cooking ability, or his life's circumstances, or anything as mundane as that, IT'S ABOUT THE FACT THAT BOOTHILL SPECIALIZES IN DEALING DEATH, THIS MAN IS EXTREMELY SKILLED, AND GOOD AT WHAT HE DOES, AND WHAT HE DOES IS MURDER!!!!!
#AND I LOVE THAT FOR HIM!!!!!!#*dreamy sigh* there is so much blood on his hands#I love morally dubious men <3#honkai star rail#hsr#honkai star rail boothill#hsr boothill#boothill#I know this eidolon's title is not a reference to any form of cannibalism. I know that.#But GOD I hope that's an in-universe rumor that spreads about him through the lower ranks of the IPC grunts JFKDLASJDKLFJ#I think he would lean into it so hard. he would have so much fun with it.#Boothill is hiding in the shadows waiting for the right moment to strike. He's listening to these two grunts gossip about him.#'Wow did you hear about that crazy cowboy. I heard they found the bodies with pieces missing.' Boothill has the biggest grin.#'I heard one time they didn't find the bodies at ALL.' 'That's terrifying!' Boothill has to bite his scarf to keep from cackling.#He keeps telling himself no no he can't reveal himself yet he's waiting for the patrol switch he has a goal today!!#'Thank the Preservation this place is safe. I wouldn't wanna be off-planet with a scary guy like that wandering around-#-especially if he really is eating people.' 'Surely that's not true though right? ...Right?'#Well. Look the point is he held out as long as he could ok.#And unable to resist the temptation any longer Boothill melts out of the shadows from behind them#right in between the two of them#and his voice is practically right in their ears as he tells them#'What'd ya think I got the teeth for?'#run boys run KFLAJKLFDJSKLFJDKLSJFDK
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Tony is obessed with magic AU
Tony: So how do I get a magic cape like yours? Can I program it? Can it fly faster than my suit? Strange: You can’t just make everything into tech, Tony. Tony: Challenge accepted. Strange: Do not make an AI-powered Cloak of Levitation. Tony: Too late. I’ve already named it ‘REGGIE’
(Reactive Elevated Guardian Guidance Intelligent Equipment)
#Tony stark#dr strange#stephen strange#ironstrange#strangeiron#incorrect ironstrange#ironstrange text posts#stranges patience has run out#tony will invent his own magic#tech and magic are basically the same right#tony is the reason strange cant have nice things#tony keeps breaking stranges magic relics#tony is obessed with magic#tony asks strange for magic lessons every week#can we talk about REGGIE tho#alt universe#ironstrange AU#tony turning stranges relics into tech equipment
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Could we get an avoid? You choose which flavor
help there’s been a shadow guy rotating in my mind constantly for (checks the date) FIVE MONTHS.
I exploded in the tags
#DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT THEM DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT HOW HE TOLD AVID TO BURN DOWN LIMBO DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT HOW HE WAS#IN THE OPPOSITE OF THE LAST AVIDVENTURES VIDEO#L O N E L Y. AND. P U R P O S E L E S S.#do you think he knew Trog was right behind him.#do you think he could hear Avid communicating with Olm.#do you ever think about how he stopped telling Marm to run and begged her to get him out#do you think he felt anything when Olm said he would have just been sent to the abyss. or was he already too used to being nowhere forever.#do you think he said goodbye to anyone before he lost his memory#do you ever think about how he doesn’t know. he doesn’t know about limbo. He doesn’t know about new Salem.#he doesn’t know he’s missing his soul. does he miss avid anyways? Does he realize that’s what it is? Or does he even know he’s feeling that#Do you think he was allowed to keep the transponder in this universe. Does he know what it is?#“I don’t know anything. You’re the only one I know.”#The only thing he knows is building Olm’s world. Olm. Who trapped him in limbo for a thousand years. Who took away his soul.#Who took away EVERYTHING he had.#and he’s so excited to give them more creators to build their world.#skyblock kingdoms#avidmc#avidmc fanart#skyblock kingdoms fanart#my art#asks
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say hi to me i don't know, i just remembered being so much brighter, i guess
cigarette ash like wildfire burning holes in the nighttime open scars feel like barbed wire white lies flying high like a ceasefire dropping flags on the shoreline this is as far as i can feel right 'cause what you don't know can haunt you
and all we ever wanted was sunlight and honesty highlights to want to repeat let's get away from here and live like the movies do i won't mind when it's over at least i didn't think for a while
don't drag it out living like that doesn't mean a thing
so let's, make a great escape and i'll be waiting outside for the getaway it doesn't matter who we are we'll keep running through the dark and all we'll ever need is another day we can slow down 'cause tomorrow is a mile away and live like shooting stars 'cause happy endings hardest to fake
and i wanna let you know i wanna let you go but i just can't bring myself to speak but this is how it goes the end credits, they roll this bridge was built over kerosene but we can watch it and all i ever wanted was sunlight and honesty highlights to want to repeat let's get away from here and live like the movies do i won't mind when it's over at least i didn't think
so let's run, make a great escape and i'll be waiting outside for the getaway it doesn't matter who we are we'll keep running through the dark and all we'll ever need is another day we can slow down 'cause tomorrow is a mile away and live like shooting stars you can wish away forever but you'll never find a thing like today
#miraculous ladybug#felix fathom#marinette dupain cheng#felix graham de vanily#🌃#ml amv#felinette felinette felinette FELINETTE#i'm shrimping so hard i'm gromping i'm making absolute tempura#yes the 2 am coco pops félix post was made while i was finishing this yes i am constantly experiencing inconsolable félix feelings#félings even. GOD GOD GOD okay listen#i could do a line by line analysis of this song and how i made the amv i have too many thoughts to put in the tags i am exploding#but in summary REPRESENTATION. REPRESENTATION. EMOTION. REPRESENTATION. EMOTION. REPLIQUE. FUCK ME#félix's trauma an open scar leading her to the art room as far as both of them will go to feel right#ALL HE EVER WANTED WAS TO KEEP ADRIEN AND THEN MARINETTE SAFE#it doesn't matter who we are we'll keep running through the dark huAHUAHHGAG I MTHRWOING UP it's how he doesn't care what she thinks of him#how she sees him whether she hates him he's Chosen her as someone to protect and he will DO IT he will TAKE HER WHEN HE RUNS#i don't care if you beat me i know i have this under control and i'm protecting you and everything is going to be okay EXPLOIDNGNIG#tomorrow is a mile away tomorrow where i find out who you are tomorrow where we have to come apart#this is how it GOES you're the hero i'm the villain adrien is the lover i'm the monster i'm the cousin#marinette and félix and Knowing each other is so#THEY DESERVE SO MANY OTHER DAYS THEY DESERVE TO SLOW DOWN AND BE WITH EACH OTHER AND NOT HAVE TOMORROW PULL EVERYTHING AWAY AND UAHAUHGAUGH#i'm not well about them. félix and freedom and escape#ALSO i have so many feelings about félix cherishing the people he wants to save so much he was willing to do the same thing that led to#his own trauma and use the peacock miraculous TWICE. ARE YOU KIDDING ME ARE YOU KIDDING ME#you can read it differently but right now come with me ARE YOU KIDDING ME#also ALSO i often think about how felinette standing in front of réplique is a reference to pv felinette#and me placing that directly before the wish is a nod to how the pv was rewritten into canon miraculous. a meta wish... felinette remains#but also in universe you can wish away the world that once was and you'll still never find another thing quite like félix#and who you were and could have been to each other today... cherish him marinette... please cherish him for me#i hit tag limit on this essay so i'm not tagging the episodes i used in the amv but i used all eight félix episodes as always
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Thinking about Orchid and her connection to my take on Gender (because this was meant to be about her and the Crew but it just devolved into a character analysis kinda??? More trauma-dumping maybe???) This is very much an oc/personal rant so feel free to ignore it 🫡
So, Orchid started off as a character I didn't really think much of (hear me out this is going to be relevant) because I wanted to add a 'girl' character but didn't know what to *do* with her, y'know? She was always going to be the strongest one there, she had the odds stacked in her favor with her parents. She was always going to be the gloomy side-character to match Reset's energy. But I think she's gone through every stage of Generic Woman I could possibly find.
At first she was angry and abrasive (think Fell!Sans) where every other word was a curse and she was likely to throw the first punch then laugh as she kicks her enemy while they're down. This was when Reset was a cartoonishly self-centered villain whose goal was simply to prove others wrong. Then Orchid became a sort of sisterly figure. This was short-lived, but she was the one comforting people who Reset would torment, but would ultimately follow his orders, because at this point he was actually a danger and sadistic. And then there was the phase where the story mellowed out and she became the token Goth Girl who, yes she was strong, but was heavy on the 'whatever' energy. Then there was her Era of deep self-loathing and anxiety about her worth that held her back and made her a much more timid and meek character who would only lash out on occasion.
Now, Orchid is the best of those iterations I've written yet. She's calm, level-headed, and a natural leader. Her father raised those traits into her. But she's very reactive, and can be silly, and when she's comfortable it's likely that air of importance transforms into something more comfortable and familiar. She laughs loudly and grins wide, she likes loud video-games but loves to read in the quiet. She's extremely disciplined, and normally no one can get through her tough exterior besides her best friend, Reset. She does what she does for her own enjoyment, sure, but she's thought of every angle and makes her choice to help Reset and control the others with her whole chest. She still worries she won't live up to her invisible expectations, and that and her loyalty are her two driving forces.
I know that Orchid is important to me because she's the longest-running female oc I've had. I have a rough relationship with womanhood/girlhood and I know looking back that Orchid recieved every ounce of my distaste for being a woman that I could shovel into her. That never made her less of a character, she was actually always one of my favorites, and rarely was she a 'punching bag oc'. I just... projected onto her a lot. And she's a good sign of how I've learned who I am. I've decided that my own femininity is something I could live without. I'd rather not associate myself with it, and I'd like to leave it in my past, focusing on a future where I'm not tied down with any gender roles or expectations. That won't happen, but I've come to terms with it myself. Orchid though? I figured out through her that I don't have to hate women characters. My own distaste for my circumstances doesn't mean I have to push it onto my characters (on God I've never expressed anything rude to actual people, that'd be rude as hell and uncalled for, but I have a bad habit of disliking fictional women in media). So, Orchid is a well-roubded character finally. She has motivations abd goals and a *lot* more depth than I ever expected her to. She's happy with being a woman, she's content. She's not treated differently for it in unfair ways by those she cares about, so she doesn't mind it. She likes to wear pretty outfits and lets Reset add bows to her ribbons. She doesn't let being a woman hold her back in the slightest.
So, yeah. Orchid is one of my babies. If I ever leave this Fandom behind for good, she's one that's coming with (Ichor, Orchid, and Pretender all have human designs I can use elsewhere lol-) but in the meantime I'll just rotate her around in my brain for a while longer.
If I'm right, she's been with me for nearly 5-6 years and I went through a *lot* with her as an outlet. So, she's kinda just like an old stuffed animal. A lil ripped, matted fur, maybe a stain or two, but there's a story there and that makes it important beyond belief.
#spotatalk#i'm just gonna drop this in the queue I guess?#but I'm writing this on the last day of june so....#whenever this rolls around will be a jumpscare abd a half I guess?#I think honestly I coukd do a full breakdown of the Crew and why they're all expressions of me but like#quick summary is#Reset: Wants approval from people but mostly clings to the past. is afraid of losing his brother and acts on it to bring him back. i#<- I lack that conviction to do whatever you have to to get your way. i worry my brother and I have a weird gap between us we wont repair#Orchid: Uhhh woman. lots of pressure that she had at one time that's now no being pressed but she still tries to live up to it also.#<- I don't like the pressure of being a woman. also gifted-kid who cannot move past the pressures imposed to be 'perfect' and it's screwed#Stereo: Pulled into a situation he doesn't want to be in initially. it's bad for him but he likes the people so he decides to stay#<- I see the good in people. even when they hurt others around me. I was a bystander often and should've left the situations. paralelling.#Monochrome: Afraid. No purpose or preperation in life. soneone offers to guide him and he takes that offer because it's better than home.#<- Kinda self-explanitory but I've got little direction and feel lost a lot of the time. If I'm given a path I usually walk it no hesitation#and... for fun let's do some others!#Haphazard: Cleaning up after others since childhood. he's never really gotten a break and sees any sort of mess as an enemy#-> He's fixing rifts in universes I gotta patch relationships. there's so much conflict and I'm always so overwhelmed by it#Lost: He's got amnesia. no clue where he is. where he's from. who you are. who he is. he'll know when he gets there. he's sure.#-> I've been hsving minor issues with my memory for years. i coukd be forgetful but sometimes it just escapes me and that's spooky#Teddy: Isolated in her universe for years. she self-mutilated until she liked herself. when she finally met people she compulsively lied#-> Much more extreme version of how isolated I sonetines feel. hobbies can't replace human interaction but it's hard#oh and Ichor: God who loves mortals but cannot seem to find ones who will prove hin right for his trust and care#<- I've got a big heart. i express it often but the sentinent is scoffed off a lot. I get beat down about it and just keep moving forward#Pretender: Knows who he is. however the world doesn't like it much so he acts how they expect him to or isolates away#<- I still present femme when I'm nb/agender. i bend and break to people's perception of me. if I can't solve something I run.#okay I feel more insane than when ai started but these stupid skeletons have helped me through so many mental health problems it's only a#little bit funny 🙏
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sometimes i think about how Lucienne the 'nearly all the dreams and nightmares had left during my time running things' dares telling Dream how to do his job 'the right' way :')
#Maybe I'm just hungry.#But seriously.#The /audacity/.#Dream who holds EVERYTHING to the best of anyone's abilities.#Lectured by someone who couldn't even keep a single palace running properly. Not to mention an entire UNIVERSE of dreams and nightmares.#But hey.#Hey. Right.#buns.txt#My periodical rage over Dream Disrespect.#bun.hc
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quick sketch of my best friends clark kent and superman
[image description: two pencil portraits of clark kent (also known as superman) from dc. the first drawing is him as clark kent while the second is him as superman. he is smiling in both portraits. /end description]
#clark kent#superman#dc#kal-el#<= i think that's his kryptonian name but i might be wrong don't correct me <3#art tag#made these designs up but i do think superman is one of those designs where it's like. Iconique. no notes <3#you don't stray very far because you don't need to <3#i don't keep up with the dc universe by the way i just like the idea of superman i've built up in my head <3#like a genuinely nice guy with superpowers <3 who's also jewish and bisexual <3#i don't think i've read any superman-centric comics. i've read the Big dc comics like the killing joke and the dark knight returns and#swamp thing the original one. i'm actually reading the first comic where superman appears right now actually <3#i like how instead of flying he used to jump and run i like seeing little quirks that come up when a character premieres and they're trying#to figure out what works and what doesn't that's neat to me <3#anyways they should stop having gritty movies where superman is mean because power corrupts or what the fuck ever.#just make him a good guy like a genuinely good person maybe it won't make a good movie for some people. i'll have a great time though <3#maybe i'm just behind on Superman Lore. i don't know i don't watch movies or shows or read books <3 (exaggerating for comedic effect)
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fallout 3 is great because if you pass a speech check you can just tell the antagonists to kill themselves and they'll do it without hesitating
#sam.txt#fallout 3 is so crazy its the riverdale of the fallout universe#i love her very dearly she's like a firstborn child to me#my favorite character is the chinese general in the call of duty sim i also love the german scientist who got accidentally trapped#in his own hell sim as a 9yo girl hes my favorite what an absolute fucking numbnut#i cant decide what i want to say with this post but fallout 3 is so special and dear to me#i also love the clan of vampire larpers who live in the subway tunnels#very immersive#your first conversation with most of them is like. OK KYS#i think the clan of vampires is actually in new vegas. sorry im a fake new vegas fan#but i do think that there is also a clan of vampire pretenders in 3?? i need to replay her shes so iconic#naur im right the quest is like a town asks you to please go talk to this insane guy running a cult#cus he keeps telling his insane followers to abduct people from that town to feed on😭#theyre called the family i need to put some respect on their name this is honestly sending me i love this game
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when its DC comics so u have to read through 10 issues of a story full of call backs to other comics it assumed you know the context of and side characters with heavy lore that's not explained but you charge on through because there are 5 panels somewhere down the line of the only two characters you care about having a brief interaction :')
#DC Comics#this is why i dont like these types of comics#'oh yeah you know Doctor Flippy right?'#'He's from Earth 20X'#'Not the original 2003 run no this is from the 2010 run'#'specifically the side stories where he features with the character Sweater Gal'#'Oh you don't know Sweater Gal?'#'For that you'll have to back to the 80s she didn't have her own comic but she was extremely important in the death crystal arc'#'You don't know about the death crystal arc?'#'Funny enough it harkens forwards to the 1990 cereal box stories you had to mail in to get all five issues'#'Of course you have to keep in mind that this Doctor Flippy is the clone of his dead brother Captain Face'#'Captain Face is from a universe where aliens aren't real so they had to retcon a lot of his backstory'#'and you have to keep in mind as to whether he's being written by Steve Buggy or Tim Fudge they have very different styles'#'Above all else you really need to know about Crisis on Ultimate Earths and if you're going to do that?'#'You really need to know about the SuperTeam that had Agent 34 who honestly ties the end of it all together'#If it weren't for Agent 34 then Sweater Gal couldn't have been brought back to life again#'Keep in mind that the Time Gods rearranged things back in 2000 so that also adjusts the 17 members of the SuperTeam'#me: i just wanna see these two characters KISS let me leave :'''')#((not loving this era lmao))
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You know what, I've resented being alive for most of my life, and its only gotten worse and worse as of recently, I'm here to stay so I want to make a promise to myself that I'm going to find the light, I want to be a source of joy for others and myself, I want to be someone that I enjoy being around, that my inner monologue is a place of understanding, knowledge, gratitude and peace rather than constant anguish, I want to have fun, not for any other reason but to have fun. I'm so tired of "living" by these rules I made up God knows when, at a time in my life when i was probably under great stress, hurt, and in danger, I love that girl, and that girl protected me, but I need her to step aside now so that I've actually got a shot at happiness.
#i keep running away from myself with these constant distractions. do i hate myself that much tht i cant stand listening to myself?#i write all this while accepting that i am flawed and im allowed to mess up. not getting it right is human. perfection isnt real.#normally id listen to something while i shower but im going to go listen to myself at least for today#trying to remind myself today i am small. the universe is huge i am small. its not as big of a deal. i can overcome these hurdles. i am goo#affirmations i guess
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Look I fundamentally understand why they’ve opted to remove survival/combat mechanics from p3 but like…I’m so sad that means I can’t occur a random bloodlust again!
#I was getting into fighters with muggers on purpose#but also I feel like doing that is a kinda disservice in a sense?#since like things are in chaos? your position in the world doesn’t matter once all hell breaks loose#it won’t save you from being stabbed in the streets it won’t save you from starving#maybeeeeee they’re gonna do some character tweaking to where there’s a in universe reason on why this isn’t an issue#and if they pull it off effectively I’ll put my money where my mouth is#however as it currently stands I don’t like it#but also makes me wonder how they plan on handling Clara? like what will her gameplay be like?#like I don’t mind them switching up gameplay styles for each healer#whatever it’s creative I can fuck with it so long as it’s done right#but like when considering Clara I feel like you can’t separate her from surivial mechanics#so it’ll probably feel odd if two out of three healers have those mechanics while the other just doesn’t?#and again maybe they’ll sell it neatly and I’ll be giving it praise#but like just AGGHHHHUUGHHHH#banging my head against the wall#guess maybe Clara they could do a more stealth mechanic? but dunno about that#I’m using mechanic when I should probably say gameplay but I’m running on two hours of sleep let me be….#please#talking to the void tag#but like I don’t see the kains going out of their way to ensure his safety#he’s just a means to an end for them he’s just a pawn he is replaceable to them#he’s not special if he died they would find someone else to further their goals#nobody has an incentive to keep him alive!#his position means fucking nothing! he is nothing in this town! nothing in this situation#he should be fighting to cling to life just like everyone else!!#but whatever! maybe my issues with this will be solved when the game is released#because maybe there will be a decent reasoning given#I need to sleep
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imagine you're a mechanic in the Transformers universe and you have a car come in with engine trouble so you open it up and the engine is just full of some kind of weird fast-spreading rust. never seen anything like it before
so you're like. hmmm. and you call the Autobots like 'hi I know this number is supposed to be for reporting possible Decepticon activity but I've got some kind of alien bullshit going on and I don't know who to ask'. they hand you over to Ratchet and Rachet is like 'hm I think I know what that is but let me come run some tests'
SO Ratchet comes over and has a look at the engine and is like yeah as I thought. its crotch rust. and you're like 'crotch rust??' and he's like yeah its crotch rust. its a. well I think humans call them STIs? its like that.
so you're like '..........are you telling me a Transformer fucked this car' and he's like yeah. looks that way. and you're like 'what in the world' and he's like I don't know. people are freaks. anyway we don't want this stuff spreading so I'll be back tomorrow with the right nanites. keep it away from the other cars.
he comes back the next day like okay so I have good news and I have bad news. you're like 'well what's the good news' and he's like WELL I spent last night testing all the autobots for crotch rust and they're all clean. so you're like 'does that mean the car wasn't fucked' and he's like oh no the car was definitely fucked there's no other way this could have happened.
so you're like 'wait. are you saying a Decepticon fucked this car?' and he's like yes. we have a Decepticon fucking cars. and they are giving the cars STIs. thank you for bringing this to our attention here are the nanites goodbye.
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I have been thinking lately about a universe where Bruce Wayne killed the Joker.
I want to be clear here, since there are so many longstanding debates on this topic: I do not think Bruce Wayne should kill the Joker. I have just been wondering what would happen if the circumstances aligned in such a way that he did.
And to be clear on a related, yet slightly different topic: when I say I have been wondering about what if Bruce Wayne killed the Joker, I do not mean as the Batman. I mean Bruce "Brucie" Wayne.
Maybe it's kind of an accident? Like, he definitely did intend to hit the Joker, but he's Brucie right now, so he's trying not to look like he knows what he's doing while still doing enough damage to keep the Joker from killing someone, and meanwhile the Joker makes just the wrong move and -
And here we are. Brucie just killed the Joker.
Bruce's reaction here is one thing; he has his one rule for a reason, he's just broken it, he's determined to turn himself in -
His family's reaction is a whole different story. How does Cass feel about this?
How does Jason? Bruce has killed the Joker, just like he wanted, but it wasn't for him, not really, and -
And meanwhile, this happens in front of, say, a gala full of people, so now all of Gotham gets to react to it too.
Average Gothamite, seeing the words BRUCE WAYNE, JOKER, and KILLED in the same headline: OH, NO.
Average Gothamite, once they've processed the order those words are actually in: . . . I did not have that on this year's bingo card.
The city's most famous mass murderer has just been publicly killed by the city's biggest employer/philanthropist/source of tabloid harmless nonsense! Three days before Brucie was making tabloid headlines by tripping into a fountain and somehow losing his shirt in the process! Two weeks before, the newspaper was running a retrospective on the Wayne murders and what donation Brucie was making to help the families of victims this year! The article mentioned how one of his adopted sons had also tragically become a murder victim!
Now this has happened, and Bruce is having a breakdown over breaking his one rule, and the rest of Gotham just assumes that this is because poor Brucie thinks this somehow makes him like the man who killed his parents. They send a huge outpouring of support his way. This in no way helps Bruce's actual breakdown.
Ninety percent of Gotham is sure Brucie didn't actually mean to kill the Joker, and pretty much a hundred percent of them support him whether he meant to do it or not. No one wants to have anything to do with prosecuting this mess. Bruce is trying to make it as clear as possible that he will fully cooperate with the justice system and meanwhile an entire gala full of people is suddenly acting like they could in no way have possibly witnessed events that took place ten feet in front of their faces. Did Bruce kill the Joker? Is the officer sure? That doesn't seem like him. Maybe the Joker just tripped on his own. Marble floors, you know. Very slippery.
#batman#not silmarillion#bruce wayne#bruce wayne kills the joker#as brucie#this is angst for the batclan and crack for the rest of gotham
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You meet god and she's mostly dead fish. You ask her why and she says most of the world is dead fish, and she's made herself to appeal to the most common denominator, the everyman funnyman comedy show that runs for eleven seasons but with the entire universe in mind. You ask her how much of the dead fish is your fault, she says it's far less than you'd think, in the grand scheme of things. You ask her if you matter at all. If you can do anything. She shrugs her rotting shoulders and says mattering is a made-up concept, like life, but sure, you can matter if you want to, on some scale. She has many scales. She doesn't know what you mean by 'anything', but you can do everything you can. You ask her if it's enough. She says there's no base requirement for deserving to exist. She's smoking a joint and the smoke filtering out of her gills gathers and forms gas giants and red dwarfs. You ask her if there's any hidden secrets of the universe you should know and she says it's not a secret if she tells, plus it's fun to let you figure it out yourself. You ask her if any of your questions were right questions and she says you worry about being right so much it might keep you from fucking around, which is as close to meaning of life as she ever bothered to make. You don't ask but she says she loves your hair, also your whole being, also your planet. She says she figured out what love is yesterday and is trying it out, which explains the ten thousand rainbows and sudden influx in rains of fish. She offers you a drag of her joint and you wake up half past midnight behind a chain restaurant clutching a smoked salmon. The new stars are winking like they're in on some joke and you're sure if you try hard enough you'll remember what it is.
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