#Kallias

[mika-no-sekai-blog]

Part III

Word count: +3900

Warnings: angst, very slight mentions of past SA, frostbites and some chuchu-muchu😉 (this chapter isn't so bad that it would need any extra warnings, but let me know if you find something that needs to added)

Part II | Part IV

The ceremony and the party afterwards went smoothly, without any remarkable events. Although, after what I had just witnessed, it was my last worry.

Emotions in Kallias' eyes as he watched her walk behind me with the veil in hands, were like a bucket of cold water, shattering any however small hopes I had.

What would be my position at this place? In this Court? How was I supposed to live here? As what? Forgotten wife? Unwanted burden? Obstacle that at some point would need to vanish quietly?

The future full of uncertainties left me feeling hollow. I wanted to cry actually. I should have listened to my father and run away while I could. Life in exile in Autumn Court would be much better than this. The fact that despite everything, Kallias was trying — pretending — made it even worse.

When I arrived at the altar, he gently took my hand and tried to smile happily. As we stood there, listening the priestess, he held me closely, trying to comfort me. After we said our vows and priestess blessed the union, it was time for a kiss and he tried to do it properly. Above all the expectations of the gathered. During the dinner and the following party, he tried converse with me, asking about my childhood, hobbies and even opinions. He went so far as pretending the interest while trying to get to know me.

Every his try was more and more painful. It was like standing in front of a magical mirror that was showing me — torturing me — with imagines of what could have been. How my married life could have looked like, if he didn't have feelings for someone else. It would be much easier, if he just simply despised me from the very beginning than giving me fake hopes. If he drew clear line on the start, I could be sure about my role, I would know how to behave. And most importantly, my heart would stay behind the walls, protected. Where there is no hope, love cannot flourish. Falling in love with Kallias would do me no good — I understood that. Yet if he kept acting this way...

It would be so easy to fall in love with him. On top of being handsome, he really seemed to be a kind person, attentive, intelligent, calm and soft-hearted. Growing up in estate where only so few young males resided and all hated me or completely ignored me, couldn't prepare me for this. I didn't want to end up as all the naive females in novels I read — falling for wrong male just to be handed own broken heart on tray.

Oh, Mother, why had you woven this fate for me? Did I offend you so much by being born?

At some point, the need to shake him got so strong that I had to clench my fingers into chair's armrest. I wanted to tell him to stop pretending when his true feelings were so clear, but I couldn't. Instead I was spiralling and anxiously observing every small change, every slip in his expression.

As we were sitting at the table, conversing, his eyes often wandered to the place where Viviane was seated next to the blond female in elegant red dress who for sure wasn't from this Court. The two of them seemed to have a good time, talking lively and laughing.

Every time he did it, I peaked at Viviane, expecting her to meet his gaze with the similar mixture of emotions. I didn't know why, but I needed that one last push that would completely shatter my hopes. I even prayed for it.

As if sensing it, she always looked up at me, smiling brightly, contently even, at both of us. I watched her closely, analysing her expression to the smallest details, yet I couldn't find any evidence of longing, pain or suppressed feelings, not even in depths of her beautiful eyes. The only tracks of love I found, was love of a good friend, sibling at the best. Instead of being relieved or satisfied, it saddened me and suddenly I felt sorry for him. Was she so blind that she hadn't noticed it yet? Or she just didn't want to acknowledge his feelings?

Last time it happened shortly before we were expected to leave the party and head to the chambers, the tiny lines formed around his lips. His disappointment hurt me more than I cared to admit. Out of sympathy, I gently touched his forearm. He slightly jerked, his eyes wide as he turned to me. For several heartbeats, he stared at me, shocked. Then his expression darkened, an icy mask slid down with loud click. He shook off my hand and moved away from me as far as he could while sitting on his chair. After that he stopped trying to talk with me and ignored me for the rest of the time we spent at party.

Before any emotions got the better of me, I cut them off. Maybe it was better this way.

Lost in my thoughts, I didn't notice that High Lord stood up, giving a speech, not until Kallias next to me stood up, too. He was looking down at some unspecified place on the table with a hand ready for me to grab on it. I did what was expected of me. We both did.

My attention shifted to my father. He looked sad, yet he smiled at me. My chest tightened painfully and I blinked away the tears. All of sudden, I had a very strange feeling that this was the last time I could see him. It was so suffocating. And Morena's expression didn't help it. Out of the corner of the eye I noticed her wide grin, the gleam in her eyes made me feel sick. The need to not let him go and to keep him here with me only grew. I felt nauseous, cold sweat rolling down my spine.

"Everything fine?" Kallias asked under his breath. Only then did I notice that I was quite trembling and squeezing his hand so tightly that my knuckles were white. However, I wasn't able to answer. I couldn't even as much as move, all my muscles locked. "You will be able to say goodbye to your family tomorrow before they leave. No need to worry."

The softness of his deep voice and the reassurance took away some of the weight pressing down on my chest and my lungs filled with air. I slowly turned to him. His expression was alert, but beneath it was hidden understanding.

"Thank you," I whispered.

With the final congratulation, High Lord sent us off. As soon as the door closed behind us, Kallias took off down the corridor, leaving me in care of Millie.

"I will show you to your chambers, milady," she bowed and led me in the same direction Kallias went while pointing out rooms we passed to help me navigate around later. "It was High Lord's wish for you to be close to his son, so we prepared the closest suitable premises for you. I hope you will find them comfortable to live in. Unfortunately, no one informed us about your likes and dislikes, so if you find something missing or wish to change anything, just let me know. I will take care of your needs from now on."

"Thank you, Millie. I'm sure you did great job. I'll certainly like it," corners of my mouth curled in a small, polite smile. Because of what she saw before the ceremony I wasn't sure how to behave around her. She must have thought something was wrong with me. With her own smile she tilted her head to the side, looking me over with curiosity. I got nervous. "Is.. something wrong?"

"No, milady," she fully grinned. "I was just thinking that you are different from the other aristocrats and especially, from the young ladies."

"Is it a bad thing?" I frowned, my palms sweating.

"Oh, it's a great thing, milady. You are more like his Highness and his family. It isn't my place to say this, but I think you will get along pretty well with young master."

I wasn't sure what to say to that, pleasantly surprised by Millie's boldness. "I hope so." Being it a different situation, her words would have made me happy. Right now the only thing I knew for sure was, that love was out of question as Kallias' heart already belonged to someone else. Maybe.. maybe someday we could become friends, though. I stored the idea in the back of my mind for the later, focussing on the present.

Climbing the flight of stairs, we got to the highest floor, dimly lit with faelights. Hallways here were wider with a sets of windows on one side. Intrigued, I stopped by one, looking out into the night.

From up here I could see back gardens and castle grounds and also a small part of the city on the other side of gorge. The view was, however, blocked by the wall. When I focussed, I could see seemingly never ending mountain range surrounding the castle and the city, with white dusted peaks that glittered in the moonlight. On one of the closest peaks that was rather a smaller one, I noticed a faint flicker of light.

"Millie? Is there anything up there?"

She stepped closer to see where I was pointing. "It could be the temple, but it's hard to say when it's so dark outside. It should be easier to see it during the day. I'm sure young master will eventually take you there, milady, as it's a place of great importance."

I nodded and followed her. There was only one set of doors in this hallway. Millie opened them and holding them for me, she waited. "These are your chambers, milady."

"And Kallias'?" I looked around in confusion. Didn't she mention that his chambers should be nearby?

"Well, his doors are located in different hallway, but as you will see, you won't need it, milady."

I hesitantly took last few steps and entered the most beautiful sitting room I'd seen in my life. Soft tiny faelights hanging from ceiling in chains like some icicles created play of light and shadow on the snow-white walls, flames roared in the big hearth, sending pleasant waves of warmth into the room. The set of comfortable looking sofas and armchairs occupied most of this space, several half filled wooden bookcases and chests decorated otherwise empty walls. Wooden floor, thick carpet, candles, blankets and pillows added to the overall welcoming comfort of this room.

My curiosity pulled me to the enormous windows that led to the balcony and the fascinating view. In awe I pushed a light lacy curtain aside to take a better look. An entire city on the other side of the gorge laid there like on my palm. I could see as far as to the flickering lights of the first gate and if it wasn't night, certainly even far beyond it.

The city was bigger than I originally thought, scrambling up and down gentle slopes, closed in between jagged peaks. The streets of the city were flooded with warm soft light, white snow making it shine even brighter, the dark windows of houses in sharp contrast with that beauty. My gaze followed those bright narrow veins that connected with each other, creating wide arteries, to the very heart of the town where they opened into a large space with probably the highest spruce tree I'd ever seen in its centre. The square shone with colours. Even from afar I could see long tables with food and people laughing and dancing. It was just as Viviane told me - everyone was out, celebrating. I was so taken by that fairytale like scenery that I didn't notice that Millie left and returned after several minutes.

"Your bath is ready," she said, kind smile lifting corners of her mouth.

"I didn't know there could be something so beautiful as this place. I always thought that the capital is cold, inhospitable city," I confessed.

"Now now," she snorted in amusement. "Wait until you see it decorated for Solstice, milady."

That piqued my interest. The Solstice was the biggest and most important celebration in Winter Court and it was only about a month from now. Even such almost deserted places as my home got excessively decorated with ribbons and glittery decorations, smell of all sorts of cakes, foods and mulled wine filling the air and mixing with smell of pine needles and freshly fallen snow. While I heard that all celebrations were over in just few days in other courts, in Winter it lasted for an entire month. Everyone seemed to be a bit kinder and generous during that time. Maybe that's why I loved it so much.

"There's going to be big celebration. Young master and his friends every year visit the market in the city. This year, they will take you with them too, milady. I'm sure you will like it," Millie continued as I followed her through the bedroom with enormous bed and hearth to the luxurious looking bathroom. Everything was so cosy.

Bathtub full of steaming water immediately drew my attention. It was big enough for at least three persons, dominating to the space. Set of soft towels waited on its edge, several lit floating candles and pink rose petals inviting one to dip in. Air was filled with smell of floral essential oils, soaps and shampoos, steam making it a bit foggy.

Stress, that was building in me ever since morning, finally took its toll and all of sudden I felt too tired to even think, my body so heavy. I couldn't wait to warm up my limbs in the bath and to head to that comfortable bed I saw moments ago. With a knowing smile, Millie helped me to undress and with a sigh I stretched out in the warm water. I was slightly dozing off while Millie took all the pins from my hair, helped me wash and then massaged my shoulders. Unable to even keep my eyes open, I made a mental note to thank her later for her care. After the bath I accepted the soft bathrobe without giving it much thoughts. It didn't even seem strange to me that there was no nightgown prepared.

"Now, everything is ready. Young master is already waiting for you in bedroom, milady," Millie said cunningly and disappeared in a secret servants' passageway before her words got registered by my sleepy mind.

In a second I was wide awake. Kallias was here? Why? And then the realisation hit me and my stomach churned. It couldn't be for real. It just couldn't...

I started to shake wildly and fell to my knees. Unable to keep it together, I wrapped arms around my chest, holding firmly. All the unpleasant memories of my stepbrother touching me floated to the surface and I sobbed. How could I forget? It was an unbreakable tradition and yet I.. I thought it just simply wouldn't happen. There was no way out of this. Whether I wanted or no, it had to happen. Short for air I doubled over, pressing forehead to marble floor. Its cool surface grounded me down and slowly I calmed down enough to think straight. If I couldn't get out of this situation, I had to come up with a way to survive it.

Kallias! That was it. Kallias wasn't Zima. He was kind - everyone said so about him so far. He would treat me with kindness. If.. if he saw that I wasn't ready, he wouldn't push me into things, right?

However crazy it was, I gripped on the belief that Kallias wouldn't treat me badly and held onto it, pushing every bad memory to the back of my mind where I slammed and locked the imaginary door behind it. In my mind I was repeating his name like some mantra, listing every small way in which he treated me kindly. Everything that was different about him. I hadn't thought that there would be a time when his pretence during wedding and party could come so handy, but here I was.

Still trembling I managed to crawl over to the washbasin and dragged myself up. From there it was only a small step to the door that separated me from the bedroom and my ordeal. Taking a deep breath I opened it with a soft click.

Kallias stood with bowed head in front of the hearth clad in the same looking bathrobe, his back to me. Both of his hands were rested on the mantel, clenched into fists, skin on his knuckles so tight that I almost could see bones beneath. His back was painfully straight, shoulders tense. If I wasn't mistaken, he was nervous.

He didn't seem to notice me as his eyes were hypnotising the dancing flames that roared wildly, yet the room was cool almost cold.

Instinctively I checked the windows, tugging the bathrobe closer. All were closed and locked from inside. A lump rose in my throat.

"Ka..llias..?"

He jerked. "Sorry," he mumbled and the room warmed up again. He turn his head in my direction, though he avoided looking at me. "I.."

He sighed. "Sorry," he repeated, this time properly facing me. His eyes darted over me swiftly and then landed on the bed. He inhaled sharply, holding his breath.

It's Kallias. Kallias. He is kind. He is different.

I desperately held on my mantra as my bottom lip quivered.

He closed his eyes and exhaled deeply, staying like that for awhile.

"Are you cold?" His voice was once again soft, caring. "Come closer and warm up. Your father mentioned that you easily get cold. It's quite rare for someone from the Winter Court, isn't it?"

"Yes." When did he make time to talk with my father? I managed to walk over the room without stumbling, but I was so nervous and scared that I was short for breath, heaving as if I had run a round around the castle before stopping next to him. His brows furrowed, his lips twisted in compassion. "I think I took that after my mother."

"Ah, the lady from Autumn Court, right? I can imagine that the weather here was harsh for someone with fire in veins."

I expected to hear scornfulness in his voice when he spoke about my mother, just as I heard it in voices of everyone except my father, but there was nothing. He said it calmly, casually, almost sorrowfully, as if it was the most natural thing. I was so surprised that I only nodded.

"Then I will have to make sure you are always warm," he smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes.

The uncomfortable silence settled between us. I didn't dare to look at him even though I would give anything to know what he was thinking at, how he felt. Despite being so close to the fire, cold sweat rolled down my spine, my imagination running wild and in absolutely wrong direction.

It's Kallias. He's kind. He won't-

His hand hesitantly touched mine and when I didn't pull away, he entwined his long fingers with mine. His frosty pale skin was soft to touch and cool. Though it didn't cause me pain like-..

It's Kallias. He's different.

I pushed any other thoughts away. It was already hard enough as I could hardly even as much as breathe.

I heard him swallow hard before his other hand reached up, taking my chin between thumb and forefinger. He was so tender when he tilted my face towards him. The way he touched me - it was definitely different. There was nothing violent about it, nothing rough or demanding, yet I played my mantra on repeat.

He leaned closer and..

Stopped.

He was waiting for me, I realized.

Heart hammering in my chest, I risked a glance at him. His crushing blue eyes were already on me, searching. His striking beauty took the last bits of air from my lungs. He looked somehow sad, torment in depths of his eyes. However, the second our gazes collided, he transformed his expression into unreadable mask, locking away anything he felt. If he really loved Viviane so much, this couldn't be anything but unpleasant duty to him. He didn't want to do this — that much was clearly written all over his face just a moment ago — yet he was trying to turn it into a pleasant experience for me.

He gave me last few seconds to prepare before he carefully pressed his lips to mine. His eyes shut closed, brows furrowed - was he imagining that he was holding her? He stilled for few heartbeats and then slightly opened his mouth, tip of his tongue lightly touched my bottom lip before he delivered another kiss. This reminded me of the wedding ceremony. Back then he did exactly the same thing.

He wasn't in hurry, his soft lips lazily dancing over mine, every stroke deeper than the previous one. His fingers moved from my chin to my cheek, cupping it, thumb drawing small circles on my skin. It was.. actually quite pleasant, soothing. However, I needed to keep my eyes open, because the second I closed them, flashes of those events twisted the reality into something else. My mantra wasn't working as efficiently here as I hoped, but seeing his face made it little better.

Kallias changed the angle, tugging me closer by the waist, adjusting his position, his body now flush against mine. That was when the things started to change. Temperature in the room again dropped so slightly and shiver ran down my spine. His other hand, now cold like ice, moved to my neck, his touch still light and tender, yet the pain marked the trace of his fingers, until they slipped into my hair. His lips grazed over my jaw and down the column of my neck to my shoulder, leaving small kisses on his way, every one of them followed by explosions of sharp pain. When he reached the collarbone, the pain was so insufferable that I cried out.

Kallias immediately stopped, his eyes shooting up to my face.

"Wha-"

When he noticed red and purple marks on my skin, his eyes widened in shock and he released me, backing away.

"That's nothing," I covered the worst of them with bathrobe, quickly wiping tears away.

"Nothing?" he whispered "How..? Why..? You are covered in frostbites." Kallias was short for words. He looked down at his hands in disbelieve. "Have I done that?"

I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. Only moments ago, he was so kind and attentive, even though he didn't want to do this. Another male in his position wouldn't give a shit. I couldn't possibly tell him that his powers were responsible for that, nor I couldn't lie to him.

Shaking his head, he was retreating, his skin paler than freshly fallen snow. He ran hand through his hair and then dragged it down his face. He was shaken.

"I-.. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to.. I'm so sorry."

He pivoted and hurried to the tall mirror in the corner of the room. It took just a light touch from him and the glass melted away, opening an entrance to a narrow corridor covered in ice and snow. Gust of cold wind brought several snowflakes into the room and I had to turn away, protecting my face. Prince of Winter rushed down that corridor, unaffected by cold. He didn't look back even when I called after him, eager to somehow explain the situation. Before I reached the mirror, glass was back on its place and Kallias was gone.

[moonlitstoriess]

Unseen, Unheard, Unloved- Initial Rhysand, Eventual Kallias x fem!Reader (2/2)

Summary: She had given him everything—her heart, her trust, and now, the child growing within her. But as Rhysand’s attention drifts elsewhere, as excuses pile up, and as whispers of a mortal girl turn into something far more dangerous, she begins to wonder: Was she ever truly seen? Was she ever truly heard? Or had she been unloved all along?

See masterlist

Part 1

Warnings: none I think

Azriel winnowed them inside the grand entrance hall of the Winter Court’s palace, and the instant her boots touched the icy marble, Y/n felt the air shift. Cold, crisp, and biting—but not in an unwelcoming way. No, it was different from Velaris’ warmth, different from the suffocating tension that had clung to her like a second skin. This was clean. It was fresh. It smelled of snow and pine, of something untouched and unburdened by the weight she had been carrying for weeks.

But her body was still heavy. Exhaustion curled in her bones, her limbs aching from both the winnowing and everything leading up to it.

Azriel set her bag down beside her, his movements careful, precise—as if handling something fragile. Which, she supposed, she was. But she wouldn’t break. She couldn’t break. Not anymore.

Before she could even take in more of her surroundings, a familiar, cool voice broke through the silence.

"Welcome to Winter, Y/n."

Kallias stood a few feet away, dressed in pristine white and silver, his platinum hair gleaming under the grand chandelier’s light. His sharp, glacial blue eyes softened as he took her in, as he noted the weary set of her shoulders, the way she clutched the front of her coat as if holding herself together.

Y/n tried to muster a smile, something resembling a greeting, but all she managed was a tired nod. “Kallias.”

The High Lord of Winter stepped closer, his gaze scanning her as if committing her presence to memory. “You must be exhausted.” It wasn’t a question.

Before she could answer, Azriel’s voice cut through, softer this time. “I’ll be checking up on you.”

She turned to him, the words lingering in the air between them. It wasn’t a warning, wasn’t a demand. Just a quiet promise. She swallowed hard, a lump forming in her throat. She wasn’t sure what she was feeling—gratitude, maybe, or guilt, or just a strange sadness that this moment, this transition, was real.

Still, she nodded. Then, before she could think too hard about it, she took a small step forward and wrapped her arms around Azriel, pressing her forehead against his shoulder.

Azriel stilled for half a second, then exhaled quietly, his own arms tightening around her in a silent promise.

"Bye, Az."

Her voice was barely a whisper, but it made his grip on her tighten. “Take care of yourself, little ghost.”

She let out a quiet breath. He hadn’t called her that in a long time.

He pulled away first, his hazel eyes flickering to Kallias.

A silent conversation passed between them. One that Y/n wasn’t fully privy to but felt in the tense set of Azriel’s jaw, in the unreadable shift in Kallias’ expression. It was an understanding. A warning. A promise.

Then, Kallias broke the silence, his voice cool but edged with something pointed.

“As long as she is with me, she will always be cared for.”

It wasn’t a simple reassurance. It was a statement. A reminder. And perhaps, a veiled jab at the one who had failed her.

Azriel’s lips pressed into a thin line. But he only nodded, only gave Y/n one last lingering glance before he winnowed away, the shadows swallowing him whole.

And just like that, it was real.

She was here.

Truly, fully here.

Silence stretched between her and Kallias before he exhaled softly. “Are you hungry?”

Y/n hesitated. “I—”

His gaze sharpened slightly, sweeping over her frame. His lips pressed into a frown. “Have they not been feeding you properly there?”

She blinked, startled by the question.

And before she could think of a response, he added, “I can see your collarbones.”

It was true. The months of stress, of sleepless nights and overthinking, had left their mark on her body. She had eaten, of course—but only enough to function. Only enough to get through the days.

But she couldn’t say that.

So she just shrugged. “It’s nothing.”

Kallias’ frown deepened. And then, to her surprise, he reached out, placing a warm, steadying hand on her shoulder. Not forceful, not imposing—just a firm, grounding presence.

“Y/n,” he said, his voice softer now. “You’re pregnant. Carrying another life, giving your energy to them. Of course, you being well-fed is of the utmost importance.”

She opened her mouth, but he was already picking up her bag. “Come,” he said smoothly. “Let me show you to your rooms personally.”

She blinked. “You don’t have to—”

“I want to.” There was no room for argument.

So she followed.

The halls of the Winter Palace were as grand as she remembered—tall ceilings, intricate carvings of wolves and swirling ice patterns adorning the archways. Everything gleamed in shades of silver, white, and blue, but it wasn’t an unfeeling cold. There was warmth woven into the design, into the soft glow of faelights lining the corridors, into the thick, plush rugs muffling their footsteps.

“You’ve made a few changes since I was last here,” she noted, her voice quiet but steady.

Kallias glanced at her. “Somewhat.”

"Somewhat?" she echoed, raising a brow. "There's an entire new wing on the east side."

His lips twitched slightly. "You noticed."

"I notice everything."

Kallias hummed. “It was necessary. We needed more space.”

Y/n huffed a quiet laugh. "For what? Ice sculptures?"

Kallias chuckled, the sound low, but real. “For expansion. Winter has been growing stronger these past few years.”

Something in the way he said it made her glance at him. “Stronger how?”

He slid a look her way, something amused but serious in his expression. “We’ve been securing better alliances. Strengthening our borders.”

Y/n tilted her head slightly. “So, politics.”

“Politics,” he agreed. Then, after a pause, “Which you’ve never had much patience for.”

She scoffed. "No, I just never had patience for stupidity in politics."

Kallias smirked. “Fair enough.”

A comfortable silence settled between them.

And then, more gently, he added, “You never answered my question.”

She frowned. “Which one?”

“If they were feeding you properly.”

Y/n exhaled, already tired of this conversation. “I ate.”

“That’s not an answer.”

She looked away. “It’s the only one I’m giving.”

A quiet beat.

Then Kallias murmured, “You don’t have to pretend with me, you know.”

Her breath caught for a moment.

She didn’t respond.

Instead, she focused on the hallway ahead—on the set of ornate doors that Kallias pushed open, revealing her chambers.

The room was beautiful—bathed in soft hues of silver and white, with a fireplace already crackling in the corner. The bed was large, draped in plush blankets that looked like they had been crafted from the softest furs. A seating area was arranged near the balcony doors, the windows opening up to a breathtaking view of the snowy mountains in the distance.

Y/n exhaled, the tension in her chest loosening just a fraction.

Kallias set her bag down by the bed. “If there’s anything else you need, you only have to ask.”

She turned to him. “This is… more than enough. Thank you, Kallias.”

He held her gaze for a long moment. Then, finally, he gave her a small nod. “I’ll send some servants to help you get settled in and bring you food.”

She wanted to argue, to say she could handle it on her own. But the truth was—she didn’t want to. She was tired. So, instead, she just nodded.

Kallias lingered for a moment longer, his expression unreadable. Then, finally, he turned toward the door.

“Rest, Y/n.” His voice was softer now, quieter. “You are safe here.”

And then, with a final glance, he left.

And for the first time in what felt like forever, she let out a breath that didn’t feel like it was suffocating her.

The first thing Y/n did after Kallias left was sit on the edge of the bed, staring at nothing. The exhaustion in her bones was unbearable, but her mind wouldn’t let her rest. The quiet of Winter was so different from Velaris, from the ever-present hum of the city, the laughter of people she had once called family. Here, there was only silence, save for the distant howl of the wind outside her window.

The room was warm, but she still felt cold.

She had barely unpacked when the servants arrived, bringing trays of food—warm soup, roasted meats, fresh bread. Everything smelled rich and comforting, but the moment she sat at the small table and lifted a spoonful of soup to her lips, she set it back down. Her stomach twisted at the thought of eating.

The exhaustion finally won over the overthinking. She stripped out of her clothes, slipped into a nightgown the Winter servants had left for her, and slid under the thick blankets. The mattress was plush, the warmth inviting. Still, it took her a long time to sleep.

When she did, her dreams were filled with shadows and echoes of the past.

The soft sound of footsteps stirred Y/n awake. At first, she barely registered it, the warmth of the blankets anchoring her to the bed, her body still sluggish with exhaustion.

Then came a gentle knock at the door, followed by the quiet creak of it opening.

"Lady Y/n?"

Y/n forced her eyes open, the dim morning light filtering through the frosted windows. A young female stood at the threshold, her hands folded neatly in front of her, eyes bright but cautious.

"I apologize for waking you," the maid said, stepping further into the room. "But I was sent to assist you in getting ready for the day."

Y/n blinked, mind still sluggish from sleep. "Getting ready…?"

The maid offered a small, polite smile. "High Lord Kallias has requested to see you. He wishes to personally show you the palace grounds."

That woke her up.

Y/n sat up slowly, rubbing her eyes. "Me?" she asked, voice raspy from sleep.

"Yes, my lady."

Y/n stared at the maid, confused. Kallias wanted to show her around? Personally?

Her first instinct was to decline. To stay buried in the warmth of the bed, to avoid whatever this new world was trying to offer her. But then she remembered Azriel’s quiet words before he left.

"Take care of yourself, little ghost."

The thought of him was enough to make her sigh, her reluctance softening just slightly.

"Alright," she murmured.

The maid nodded, moving to help her out of bed. Y/n accepted the assistance, stretching her limbs carefully before allowing the female to guide her toward the dressing screen.

"The High Lord wanted you to be comfortable, so he had clothes prepared for you," the maid said as she unwrapped a fresh set of winter garments.

Y/n hesitated before reaching out to feel the fabric. It was soft, warmer than anything she’d ever worn before, and lined with fur along the collar and sleeves.

"It’s beautiful," she admitted quietly.

"Everything in Winter is made to withstand the cold," the maid explained as she assisted Y/n into the outfit. "And with your condition, the High Lord was adamant that you have only the warmest materials available."

Her condition.

Y/n looked down at her stomach, her hands instinctively brushing over the swell of it. She had almost forgotten—almost.

A child. Rhysand’s child.

Her throat tightened.

"Do you need anything before we leave?" the maid asked gently, sensing the shift in her mood.

Y/n forced herself to breathe, to push those thoughts away. "No," she said, lifting her chin slightly. "I’m ready."

The maid studied her for a moment before nodding and leading her toward the door.

As they stepped into the hall, Y/n found herself exhaling slowly, steadying herself. She could do this. She would do this.

She was nervous, but there was something thrilling about wearing these colors—Kallias's colors. Winter’s colors. She had heard the whispers about how striking she looked in the ensemble, but it was Kallias's reaction that she had been anticipating the most.

As she rounded the corner into the main corridor, her heart fluttered at the sight of Kallias standing by one of the grand arches, his eyes immediately falling on her. He was speaking to a servant, but the moment his gaze landed on her, everything else seemed to fall away.

His lips parted, his jaw tightening for a split second before his eyes widened in clear awe. His posture straightened, and he seemed to forget the conversation altogether as he stepped forward.

Y/n felt her breath catch in her throat, suddenly self-conscious. His gaze was intense, as though he could see straight through the fabric to the very essence of her.

“You look…” Kallias's voice faltered slightly, his words tripping over themselves as he stared at her, clearly taken aback. “You look... breathtaking, Y/n.”

A warmth spread through her chest at the sincerity in his voice. She felt herself flush, the heat in her cheeks rising despite the chill of the palace around them.

“I... thank you,” she murmured, suddenly unsure of what to say. She wanted to dismiss his comment, but his reaction made her heart flutter in a way she wasn’t quite prepared for. His gaze was soft but filled with admiration, and it made her feel special, cherished even.

“I’ve seen many dressed in Winter’s colors,” Kallias continued, still a little breathless. “But none wear them like you.”

Y/n smiled at that, feeling a strange giddiness inside her. “I... I’m not sure I’m used to it,” she said, her voice almost shy as she glanced down at the dress.

He stepped closer, his eyes never leaving hers. "You wear them with such grace, as though Winter was made for you."

She could feel the heat of his gaze, the weight of his words settling over her like a comforting blanket. It was impossible not to feel seen, truly seen, in that moment.

Before she could respond, Kallias quickly cleared his throat, trying to regain his composure. "Shall we? The palace grounds await."

They stepped outside, and the cool air of Winter immediately wrapped around them. Snowflakes drifted lazily through the sky, their icy touch brushing against Y/n’s cheeks as she walked alongside Kallias. He led her through the sweeping courtyard, the grandeur of the palace laid out before them like a kingdom untouched by time. The air felt still, the only sound being the crunch of their boots in the snow.

"I’m glad to see you settling in," Kallias said, his voice warm but with a subtle edge of concern. "Winter is... different, I know. But I’m glad you chose it as your place of peace."

Y/n glanced at him, her thoughts swirling. “I needed something... quiet. Somewhere to breathe,” she said, her tone soft.

“You’ve come far,” he observed, glancing at her from the corner of his eye. "But—" He hesitated, clearly unsure how to continue. "But why Winter? Why not the Night Court?"

Her stomach flipped at the mention of Rhysand, and she quickly deflected. “I think I just needed the distance,” she said, her voice a little sharper than she intended. “Rhysand has a lot on his plate, and I didn’t want to add to that.”

Kallias didn’t press her immediately, but his sharp eyes seemed to catch every tiny change in her expression, every flicker of discomfort. There was a brief silence, and then he changed the subject with a gentleness that surprised her.

“Well,” he said, his voice lighter now, “Winter may be cold, but it has its warmth in unexpected places. Take the ice gardens, for example.” He gestured toward the path ahead, where the glistening, frozen flowers seemed to sparkle like jewels in the sunlight. “The flowers are grown by our people, with care and patience. Something about them... they remind us of the resilience Winter offers.”

Y/n was entranced by the sight. The beauty of the ice flowers seemed to mirror her own thoughts—fragile, yet persistent. “They’re beautiful,” she said, her voice filled with wonder.

“They are,” Kallias agreed, his smile warming his face. “They remind me of my people. Of how, even in the harshest of winters, we find a way to thrive.”

They continued their walk, moving through the courtyard toward the training grounds. Y/n caught sight of some of Winter’s warriors practicing their skills, each of them moving with disciplined precision. There was a quiet power to them, a strength that seemed almost palpable.

“Winter warriors,” Kallias said, as if reading her thoughts. “They are the heart of our court. They defend these lands with their lives, and they do so without hesitation.”

Y/n watched them for a moment longer, her mind briefly wandering to what it would be like to be part of something so powerful. Her stomach tightened, but she quickly pushed the thought aside.

“They look... strong,” she commented, trying to distract herself.

“They are,” Kallias agreed with a hint of pride in his voice. He glanced at her, his gaze thoughtful. “I respect them deeply. They remind me that strength is not just physical—it's in how we weather the storms, how we carry on.”

As they continued, Kallias showed her more of Winter’s wonders: the grand library, where the ancient texts of Winter’s history were kept, and the quiet nursery, where young children played in the snow, their laughter ringing out like music to Y/n’s ears.

Seeing the children, Y/n’s chest tightened. For a brief moment, she allowed herself to imagine what it would be like to watch her own child—her soon-to-be faeling—play and grow in a world that was, despite its trials, filled with warmth. The thought of their laughter, the innocence of childhood, made her heart swell. But just as quickly, that warmth faltered, a sharp pang of uncertainty twisting in her gut. She thought of the father, and the disappointment that would soon greet their child. The weight of that truth settled heavily in her chest, the lightness of the moment slipping away.

She let out a soft breath, unsure whether she should voice the thoughts swirling in her mind. But Kallias was beside her, his presence reassuring as always.

He caught her gaze and offered a small, knowing smile. "You'll find your peace here, Y/n. You’re not invisible to us. You never will be."

His words struck a chord deep within her, and for the first time in what felt like forever, she allowed herself to believe it.

Y/n’s breath caught in her throat as she entered the breakfast room. The space was like something out of a dream—a vision of comfort and warmth amidst the icy landscape. The walls were adorned with intricate ice carvings that seemed to shimmer in the pale light streaming through the large, open windows. The soft, crystalline glow of the snow outside reflected against the glass, casting a cool, blue light throughout the room. Fresh, crisp air drifted in through the open panes, filling the room with the scent of winter—clean, pure, and invigorating.

The centerpiece of the room was an exquisite ice glass table, its surface smooth and glistening. It was shaped in a perfect circle, almost like the moon itself, and it sat near the grand window, offering a panoramic view of the Winter Court's sprawling grounds. Snow-covered trees stretched as far as the eye could see, and the distant mountains were crowned with frost, standing tall and proud in the winter sky. The soft crunch of snow underfoot could be heard in the distance, accompanied by the occasional call of a bird soaring through the crisp morning air.

Kallias stood by the table, his tall figure framed by the sunlight streaming through the windows. The warmth of the room was a stark contrast to the coldness of the landscape outside, but it felt so comforting. It was a sanctuary.

Y/n stepped in, eyes wide as she took in the serene beauty of the room. She was still adjusting to being here, still unsure of what to expect. But the peaceful atmosphere seemed to ease her troubled thoughts, if only slightly.

She hesitated for a moment, glancing at Kallias, who had already moved toward the table, preparing to sit down. He looked back at her, his brow slightly raised, as though expecting her to join him.

“Wait… You’re having breakfast with me too?” Y/n asked, her voice betraying a slight edge of surprise.

Kallias paused, a faint expression of confusion crossing his face. “Yes. Why wouldn't I?”

She shrugged slightly, not wanting to delve too much into the strange discomfort she felt about it. "Shouldn’t you have some more important High Lord things to do? I mean... shouldn't you be dealing with other matters? Running a whole court?"

Kallias didn't miss a beat, his smile warm but firm as he cut her off. “My priority is making sure you’re well. You’re pregnant, alone in a new place, and probably in need of some company. Why wouldn't I stay and keep you company?" He gave a small, almost amused chuckle, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes, as if the idea of leaving her alone was incomprehensible to him. "I would think this is the least I can do for you.”

Y/n’s breath caught in her throat. She was surprised by how matter-of-fact Kallias was about it—how easily he dismissed her discomfort with something so genuine. She didn’t have an answer for him, but she did feel a pang of something in her chest, something warm that slowly began to ease her wariness.

Before she could say anything further, he spoke again, his voice quieter, softer. “You’ve been through a lot, Y/n. And yes, Rhys isn't here. You may feel lonely, I can imagine. But I won’t leave you alone unless you ask me to.”

The mention of Rhys made something tighten in her chest. Her throat constricted as her mind flashed back to the months before—how his absence had felt like a cold void in her life. His distance, the fact that he had retreated into his "duties" and left her with little more than empty promises.

Kallias was right. She had been lonely, even before coming here. But she couldn’t—no, she shouldn’t—talk about that now. So instead, she just shrugged again, her voice faltering as she spoke, though she didn’t realize it. “Well, no... not really,” she mumbled, her gaze dropping to the floor, the words tumbling out before she could stop them. “He used to... he used to have breakfast with me every morning. But, since my pregnancy... he’s had more important things to do.”

Kallias froze, his hand still hovering near the back of the chair, and for the briefest of moments, his eyes darkened. His expression shifted from curiosity to something harder to define. But it was gone as quickly as it came, and he masked it with a soft, reassuring smile. “More important things...” he repeated, his voice filled with an edge of something she couldn’t quite place.

He stepped forward, placing his hand gently on her shoulder, guiding her toward the table. “Y/n,” he said, his voice low and protective, “you are never an afterthought here. Not by me. You are never a burden or an inconvenience.” His eyes met hers, sincerity written in every word, every glance. “You are a priority. And so is your child.”

Y/n’s heart squeezed painfully in her chest at his words. She had never heard them from Rhys, not since the pregnancy began. She had heard about his ‘important work’ and his ‘obligations.’ She had heard about everything else except her.

Now she knew why.

Kallias pulled out the chair for her, and for a moment, she stood there, uncertain, before taking a seat. The table before her seemed so foreign, but oddly inviting—something about the simplicity of it soothed her in a way she couldn’t explain.

He pushed her chair in gently and moved around to the opposite side, where he seated himself as well. The silence between them felt comfortable, not awkward, and Y/n found herself leaning into it, a small part of her grateful for Kallias' presence.

That little breakfast marked the beginning of a new chapter in Y/n’s life. Her time in the Winter Court, now almost a week into her stay, had transformed from uncertainty to something more comfortable, more familiar. Kallias had seen to it that she was well taken care of. The warmth of the palace, the crisp air outside, and the peaceful surroundings made the months of her pregnancy bearable. Each day felt like a healing step, both physically and emotionally.

Her bump, now at eight months, had grown rounder, more pronounced. It was impossible to ignore, and though it felt heavy at times, there was also a sense of pride that came with carrying this new life inside of her. She was doing this. Alone, yes, but she was doing it. She could handle it. Or at least, she told herself that every morning as she slipped out of bed and prepared for the day.

Kallias had been a constant presence, always checking in on her, offering kind words, and inviting her to walks around the palace grounds. He was thoughtful in a way that made her feel safe, yet distant enough to allow her space when she needed it. He treated her with respect, never prying too much, but always there with a comforting smile when she needed it most.

But beneath the surface of this peaceful life, the nightmares never stopped. They came in waves, uninvited and unwelcome, twisting her mind with their brutality.

Rhysand’s betrayal still haunted her, even here, in this foreign place. There were moments when she would find herself dissociating, her gaze unfocused as her thoughts spiraled. It wasn’t just the constant ache of her loss, but the sudden, unbearable images that would flash before her eyes. Images of that night. Of Rhysand and Feyre in her bedroom, kissing, their bodies pressed together in a way that left no room for doubt. The dream replayed itself in her mind constantly, a sickening reminder of everything that had been ripped away from her.

She would blink, and the memory would vanish as quickly as it appeared, leaving her breathless, her chest tight. She couldn’t escape it. And yet, despite her aching heart, she pretended she was fine. She told herself that she was healing, moving on. Each day with Kallias felt like another layer of protection, a cocoon she’d built around herself to shield her from the past. But deep down, she knew she wasn’t truly healing. She was only pretending, masking the pain.

And Kallias knew. He saw through the facades, though he never asked about the cracks in her armor. His presence was gentle but insistent, like a steady hand on her back, urging her to heal in her own time.

But that didn’t mean he couldn’t see the wounds.

One night, two weeks into her stay in Winter, she woke again to a nightmare.

The dream began like any other—a vision of Rhysand, of their time together, filled with love, tenderness, and hope. His arms wrapped around her, pulling her close, whispering promises of forever. She felt the warmth of his lips against hers, the love she had once known. It felt real. It felt like him. And for a moment, she allowed herself to believe in the dream—believe that maybe, just maybe, things could be the way they once were.

But then, as always, it turned. It warped.

His face twisted, his eyes cold. The warmth was gone. The love was gone.

“You’re not my mate, Y/n,” he spat, his voice cutting through her like a blade. “Feyre is. She always has been. So why don’t you just leave?”

Her heart shattered, her chest seizing with an unbearable ache as the words echoed in her mind. Why don’t you just leave?

She woke with a jolt, gasping for breath, drenched in sweat, her heart pounding painfully in her chest. The room was too dark, too quiet, and the only thing that kept her grounded was the soft sound of her own ragged breathing. Her hands trembled as she wiped away the sweat from her forehead, trying to calm her shaking body.

But then, she felt it.

Warm arms—strong, steady—slid around her, pulling her against a solid chest. She froze, her heart racing, a gasp escaping her lips.

“Shh, it’s alright,” a soothing voice whispered, low and calm. “You’re safe.”

Y/n blinked, her thoughts hazy as she tried to make sense of what was happening. It took a moment for the fog to clear, and when it did, she saw him—Kallias, sitting beside her on the bed, his chest bare and his hair mussed from sleep. His worried eyes studied her face, his hands gently brushing the sweat-soaked strands of hair from her forehead.

“What... what are you doing here?” she whispered, her voice shaking as she struggled to regain her bearings.

Kallias didn’t answer her immediately, only pulling her closer, his arms tightening around her as if he could absorb the pain she was feeling. His heart beat steadily beneath her ear, a rhythm that she clung to. She could feel the warmth of his skin against hers, but it wasn’t just physical warmth—there was an emotional depth there that made her want to melt into him.

“I felt your pain,” he murmured, his voice thick with concern. “I heard you calling out... shouting. You’re next to my room, and I couldn’t ignore it.”

Y/n blinked again, trying to process his words, the meaning of them, but her thoughts were foggy. He felt my pain?

But the thought quickly slipped away as she focused on the fact that he was here, now. Holding her. Her breath hitched as she whispered, “I... I’m sorry. What was I shouting? What happened?”

Kallias gave her a small, reassuring smile, though his eyes were still heavy with concern. “You were just shouting ‘no,’” he said softly, his thumb brushing over the back of her hand. “That’s all.”

Y/n’s chest tightened, but relief flooded her. She hadn’t spoken about Rhys. He didn’t know.

But then, as quickly as the relief came, the memories of the nightmare returned. The cruel words Rhys had spoken—the betrayal, the rejection—tore through her heart again. Her breath caught, and her face crumpled as the tears started to fall. Uncontrollable, heart-wrenching sobs wracked her body as she clung to Kallias, burying her face in his chest.

He didn’t question her. Didn’t ask why she was crying, didn’t ask about Rhys. He just held her, his hand rubbing soothing circles on her back as she cried. He held her like she was the most precious thing in the world, his strong arms never wavering.

Y/n’s chest shook with the intensity of her grief. It felt as though all the pain she had buried, all the hurt she had held inside, was finally being released. She wasn’t alone in this moment. Kallias was there, and he didn’t demand anything from her—he just was there.

She cried for what felt like hours, the weight of everything too much to carry. And when her sobs finally slowed, when the ache in her chest began to lessen, she pulled away slightly, her eyes red and puffy, her face blotchy.

Kallias’ gaze was soft, his worry still there, but now there was a quiet understanding in his eyes.

“You’re not alone,” he said, his voice gentle but firm. “I’m here, Y/n. I’m here for you.”

And for the first time in months, she allowed herself to believe it. She allowed herself to believe in the comfort he offered, the tenderness, the care.

For now, it was enough.

And for the first time in a long time, Y/n didn’t feel invisible.

Snow drifted beyond the frost-lined windows of his study, the icy landscape of Winter Court bathed in a soft morning glow. The beauty of it should have brought him the usual sense of peace. Instead, Kallias found himself staring blankly at the papers in front of him, his mind elsewhere.

Or rather—on someone else.

Y/N.

He exhaled sharply, leaning back in his chair. It had been a week since she arrived. Two weeks of watching her, observing the way she carried herself—like someone who was trying too hard to appear whole. At first glance, she looked well enough, but Kallias had always been perceptive. And Y/N… she was anything but fine.

She had come to Winter alone. Pregnant and alone.

That fact alone unsettled him.

How could Rhysand allow his supposed mate—his pregnant wife—to travel to another court by herself? If it were his mate, his wife, he would never—never—have let her out of his sight, let alone across Prythian.

The first day she arrived, he had noticed it.

Beneath the heavy cloak, beneath the graceful way she moved, something had been… off. She looked uncared for. Not in the sense that she was unkempt, but in the way a male should care for his pregnant beloved—fussing over her, ensuring her comfort, making sure she felt loved.

Kallias had tried to push the thought away. Surely, there was an explanation. Rhysand wasn’t a fool—he had always been a male who protected what was his. Yet, Y/N was here, alone. No messages from Rhysand. No sign of him even worrying about her absence.

Kallias drummed his fingers against the polished wood of his desk.

There were things he wasn’t being told. He could feel it.

And last night had only confirmed his suspicions.

The memory of her nightmare was still fresh in his mind—the frantic pull in his chest that had woken him, the way he had found himself running to her door before he even realized what he was doing. Her shouts, her fear. He had felt it like a blade to the ribs.

And when he found her, drenched in sweat and tears, sobbing into his arms…

His jaw tightened.

It had taken everything in him not to stay. Not to hold her until morning, until he knew for certain she would be all right. But she wasn’t his. She had never been his.

If only she knew.

If only she had ever noticed him properly before.

Kallias let out a low, bitter chuckle, shaking his head at himself. Pathetic. After all these years, the feeling had never truly left, had it? Even when he was barely a young High Lord, he had felt it—that pull toward her, the way she lit up every room she entered. She had been his first quiet longing, his other half, even before he fully understood what it meant. But she had already belonged to someone else.

And now, here she was, in his court, in his home, carrying another male’s child.

Kallias clenched his jaw, shutting his eyes for a moment.

He would not make a fool of himself. He would not fail her. She had come here, had chosen his court for her solace. He would be the sanctuary she needed—nothing more.

“Dare I ask what’s making you scowl like that?”

Kallias opened his eyes to find Marek, his second-in-command, watching him with raised brows, an amused smirk tugging at his lips. The male stood across the desk, setting down a stack of reports.

“Nothing,” Kallias said coolly, straightening in his seat.

Marek gave a skeptical hum before sitting in the chair opposite him. “Right. Nothing. Which is why you’ve been glaring at your desk like it personally offended you.” He exhaled, leaning back. “This wouldn’t have anything to do with the High Lady of Night, would it?”

Kallias stiffened slightly but kept his face impassive. “She is a guest in my court.”

“She is a pregnant guest in your court,” Marek corrected, studying him. “Alone. Without her partner. Which, frankly, is something I didn’t think I’d ever see.” He shook his head. “Strange, isn’t it? That the great Rhysand would let his beloved travel alone, stay alone—especially now.”

Kallias remained silent, his fingers curling slightly against the desk.

Marek wasn’t wrong.

“That surprises you too, doesn’t it?” Marek pressed, tilting his head.

Kallias exhaled through his nose, glancing out the window before finally speaking. “I won’t pretend to understand the affairs of another court,” he said carefully. “But yes. It is… unexpected.”

Marek studied him for a moment before his lips twitched. “You’ve been softer lately.”

Kallias turned back to him, brows furrowing. “Excuse me?”

Marek smirked, leaning his elbows on the desk. “Since she arrived, you’ve been… different. Softer.” His voice was laced with amusement.

Kallias scoffed. “You’re imagining things.”

“Oh, am I?” Marek drawled. “Because last I checked, you don’t usually look at guests like you’re ready to tear apart whatever put that sadness in their eyes.”

Kallias tensed but masked it with a blank stare. “You’ve had too much wine.”

Marek only chuckled. “Maybe. Or maybe I just see what you refuse to admit.”

Kallias gave him a pointed look. “Enough.”

Marek’s smirk widened, but he raised his hands in surrender. “Fine, fine. Back to business.” He slid a set of documents across the desk. “The plans for the new army base. You wanted to review the latest designs.”

Kallias exhaled, pushing aside the weight in his chest. “Good. Let’s go over them.”

Marek didn’t say another word on the matter, but the knowing gleam in his eyes remained.

And even as Kallias turned his attention to the documents before him, a single truth echoed in his mind—one he was desperately trying to ignore.

He was getting too close to her.

And he didn’t know if he could stop.

It started during a healer’s visit.

The Winter Court had its own healers, and Kallias, in his quiet, careful way, had made sure that Y/N had regular check-ups. He never pushed too hard, never insisted she take the treatments, but the way he made sure things were taken care of spoke volumes.

Today, he was sitting by the large window of her quarters, papers scattered across the table in front of him, though his attention kept drifting toward her. She hadn’t been feeling her best recently—more tired than usual, more distant—but the sight of him nearby always seemed to soothe her.

The healer, a soft-spoken male named Hesperos, was gentle and methodical in his examination, pressing his warm hands to Y/N’s swollen belly, murmuring soothing words of a spell. The healing magic rippled through her, a cool, peaceful energy.

“The baby is strong. Healthy,” Hesperos said with a smile. Y/N exhaled in relief, her shoulders relaxing.

Kallias, however, didn’t smile. His focus remained unwavering, but something about the way he was sitting, so quietly intense, made Y/N feel as though he was seeing through her. She didn’t know why it felt that way.

She smiled at the healer, her voice soft. “Thank you, Hesperos. I feel much better after every visit.”

Hesperos gave a warm chuckle. “It’s our job to make sure you do, my lady.”

But then, his expression shifted. He blinked, his hands pausing over her stomach. Y/N’s gaze flicked between him and Kallias, her stomach tightening slightly at the sudden tension in the room.

“Is something wrong?” Y/N asked, her voice shaking just a little.

The healer seemed almost uncertain, glancing at her before looking toward Kallias. His gaze lowered, his hands falling back to his sides. “My lady… I need to ask… Have you been under any extreme stress lately? Or emotional strain?”

Y/N blinked, frowning. “Stress?” she echoed, forcing a laugh. “I mean, of course, I’ve been tired lately, but—”

“No, it’s not just the fatigue,” Hesperos interrupted gently. “This is something more than simple exhaustion. I’m detecting some… emotional strain.”

Y/N’s smile faltered, her mind racing. She quickly shook her head, a forced chuckle escaping her lips. “That’s ridiculous. I’ve been resting well here. I haven’t been stressed. Everything’s fine.”

But there was a strange, almost skeptical look on Hesperos’s face. He leaned a bit closer, studying her carefully, his voice dropping to a near whisper. “What I’m sensing, it’s the kind of strain we see in those who’ve endured emotional trauma. Perhaps…during or maybe even before the pregnancy?”

A weight settled over her chest. She felt the breath catch in her throat, the room feeling suddenly too small. She could feel Kallias’s eyes on her now, sharp, calculating.

Y/N shifted uncomfortably. She didn’t know how to respond.

The healer, sensing her discomfort, withdrew slightly, his expression sympathetic. “It’s nothing too serious. The baby’s fine. But I would advise you to take some more time to care for your emotional well-being. Take it easy, my lady. Rest, and avoid any unnecessary stress.”

“Of course, of course,” Y/N replied quickly, nodding. “I’ve been resting plenty. I’ll take care of myself.”

Kallias hadn’t said a word. He hadn’t moved either. He was just staring at her, his jaw clenched, his hands folded on the table, his expression unreadable.

Y/N felt her heart race.

She looked away, suddenly feeling the weight of his gaze. She forced herself to look calm, to smile. “Nothing, Kallias. It’s nothing.”

But he wasn’t convinced. His eyes narrowed slightly, though his voice remained calm. “You’re hiding something from me.”

She shifted uncomfortably. Was this it? Was this where it all ended?

“I’m not hiding anything,” she said quickly, her voice tight. “I’m just… I’ve been through a lot, that’s all. And I’m pregnant.” She shrugged. “It’s normal.”

But he was still staring at her. His lips pressed into a thin line, and his eyes flickered with some unreadable emotion.

Finally, he stood up from the chair. The motion was quick, almost as if he’d made a decision. His expression remained unreadable, but Y/N felt the tension in the air.

He walked toward the door without another word.

“Kallias?” Her voice barely broke the silence.

He paused at the door but didn’t turn around.

She didn’t know why, but she found herself standing, moving toward him. The instinct to reach out, to stop him, was stronger than the part of her that told her to stay still.

But before she could take another step, Kallias turned sharply, his voice cutting through the quiet. “I’ll be back in a moment.” And just like that, he left the room.

The door clicked shut, leaving her in a sea of confusion. Her mind raced as she tried to make sense of his sudden departure. Was he angry? Disappointed? Did he think she was lying?

Why was he upset?

Y/N stood frozen in place, her heart heavy.

“Why does it feel like he’s mad at me?” she whispered under her breath. “What did I do?”

Her chest tightened with the rush of emotions.

She moved toward the window, staring out at the stark beauty of the Winter landscape, but it wasn’t the frozen scenery that filled her mind. It was him—Kallias’s withdrawn look, his darkened expression, the quiet fury in his eyes.

But maybe he was disgusted by her. Maybe she was too much of a burden. He’d been kind, too kind, and now, with everything she’d been holding inside, she probably had let it slip. He probably didn’t want to be around someone like her.

Just the thought made her stomach turn. She couldn’t hold on to his kindness forever.

Her gaze fell to the door, but just before she could even begin to move towards it, she was stopped by the healer, his expression soft and calm.

“My lady,” he said gently, his eyes full of understanding, “please, you can’t be running around with a belly like that.” He gestured to the comfortable chair by the window, urging her to sit back down. “Rest for now.”

Y/N nodded silently, sinking into the chair with a sigh. She was exhausted. Mentally, emotionally… physically.

But even as she closed her eyes and tried to push away her thoughts of Kallias, her mind kept returning to him. His departure had felt like something more than just irritation.

Was he disgusted by me?

Did he hate me now?

I’ve pushed him too far.

She closed her eyes tight, unable to stop the tears that pricked at her eyelids.

He barely felt himself move as he stormed out of the room.

His mind was spinning, his pulse roaring in his ears like a blizzard. The healer’s words echoed over and over again in his head.

Extreme stress. Emotional strain. Trauma.

And then—before the pregnancy.

Kallias’ hands curled into fists as he raced down the halls of his palace, his heart slamming against his ribs. His thoughts were a whirlwind, pieces snapping together, his worst suspicions solidifying into a devastating truth.

She wasn’t just struggling because of the pregnancy.

She had been suffering long before she ever arrived in Winter.

Kallias knew. He knew.

A growl ripped from his throat as rage flooded his veins. His magic surged, ice crackling at his fingertips as he barely managed to contain the violent storm building within him.

He wouldn’t contain it.

Not this time.

Not when she had been suffering in silence, not when she had been left like this, abandoned and alone, with his child growing inside her while she silently broke apart.

The halls blurred around him as he winnowed in a snap of ice-cold wind, the world bending to his fury.

The wards around the townhouse shattered the moment Kallias appeared.

The sheer force of his arrival cracked the air like a thunderclap, shaking the very foundations of the house.

Rhysand’s inner circle was gathered in the sitting room, locked in a heated argument, voices overlapping in tension and frustration.

“I can’t believe you—” Mor was snarling at Rhys, her hands clenched at her sides.

“She deserved better than this, Rhys,” Azriel’s voice was colder than night, his wings flaring slightly as he stood rigidly beside Cassian.

Feyre’s voice was tight. “I didn’t—”

“She probably hates us too because of the shit you dragged us into,” Cassian interrupted, his expression dark with disbelief.

And then, in a blink, the argument halted.

Because Kallias was suddenly there.

The moment he appeared, a bitter chill flooded the room, ice creeping along the floor, frost curling at the windows.

Rhys barely had time to react before Kallias launched at him.

“You little bastard.”

The words were venom, spat through clenched teeth, right before Kallias swung.

The impact was sharp, a solid hit to Rhysand’s jaw that sent him stumbling back. Gasps erupted around them—someone shouted Kallias’ name—but he wasn’t done.

Rhys recovered quickly, eyes flashing pure fury, and retaliated, his power snapping through the air as he tackled Kallias.

Fists flew, the sound of their bodies colliding shaking the very walls of the townhouse. Furniture splintered, ice and darkness clashing violently as Kallias slammed Rhys into the floor, his hands around his throat.

“How dare you,” Kallias seethed, his grip tightening. “How fucking dare you.”

Rhys wrenched free, throwing Kallias off him with a burst of raw power. Kallias skidded across the room, but he was already back on his feet, already lunging again—

Cassian and Azriel intervened.

Cassian caught Kallias, hauling him back with an iron grip, barely keeping him restrained. Azriel stood between them, his expression unreadable but watchful, wings flared wide.

“What the hell is wrong with you?!” Cassian bellowed, struggling to hold Kallias back.

Kallias didn’t answer. His gaze was still locked on Rhys, both of them breathing heavily, murder in their eyes.

Until his gaze shifted.

Feyre.

She was kneeling beside Rhys, her fingers gently brushing over his jaw, her eyes wide, lips parted slightly in concern.

That was all Kallias needed to confirm everything.

His stomach twisted, something cold and ugly settling in his chest.

His muscles tensed, and he shoved Cassian off him.

“When you saved us all from Under the Mountain,” Kallias said, his voice deadly quiet, his cold blue eyes settling on Feyre, “when I gave you a part of my power… I never thought I would ever regret it.”

A muscle ticked in Rhys’ jaw.

Kallias took a slow step forward, gaze flicking back to him.

“But now, standing here, seeing this ugly, pathetic scene before me, I feel nothing but regret. And disgust.”

Silence.

Feyre’s breath hitched, but Kallias ignored it.

His glare returned to Rhys, who still held his furious, defensive stance, though something uneasy flickered across his face.

Kallias bared his teeth. “Do you even realize what you’ve done to her?” His voice was quieter now, but sharper than shattered ice.

Rhys didn’t answer.

Kallias took another step, his fury rising again.

“If you wanted to break things off, you should’ve done it before putting a child in her. Before making her worry, before leaving her to suffer alone.”

A thick, heavy silence.

Everyone was watching.

Even Amren’s expression was unreadable, her lips pressed into a tight line.

Kallias’ voice rose.

“She has been having episodes where she freezes, clutching her belly and staring into nothing—” He gritted his teeth.“And when I bring her back, when I gently bring her back to the present, do you know what she does?” His laugh was cold. Cruel. “She smiles like nothing happened.”

Rhys’ face remained unreadable.

Kallias’ voice turned into a snarl.

“Do you know she has nightmares every gods-damned night? Almost as if she’s being reminded of your disgusting actions?”

Feyre flinched.

Kallias stepped even closer, furious now.

“And do you know, Rhysand—” His tone was filled with nothing but pure wrath now. “—that she has been doubting herself every moment? She’s been trying to hide it, but it’s killing her. From within.”

Rhys’ expression finally cracked. A flicker of guilt.

Kallias sneered.

And then, his voice dropped into ice-cold steel.

“You better apologize. On your knees.”

His words struck deep, the weight of them suffocating the room.

“Beg for her forgiveness, because you still have a gods-damned faeling on the way, and you best hope you can be a good father—at the very least.”

He took in Rhys’ barely concealed guilt, the tension crushing the room.

And then Kallias turned.

His parting words were quiet, but lethal.

“Because if you aren’t—” he gave one final, piercing glare “—I will make sure you regret it for the rest of your immortal life.”

And with that, he vanished, winnowing away in a gust of frozen wind.

Leaving behind nothing but a chilling silence.

An hour had passed since the healer had left. An hour of pacing, of restless hands wringing together, of her mind spiraling with thoughts she could not untangle.

Kallias was nowhere to be found. She had searched, called his name softly in the empty halls, but there had been no response. And with every passing moment, the worry in her chest grew, coiling tighter and tighter.

So when she finally stepped out of her room, heart pounding, she nearly missed him—almost didn't see him slipping into his own chambers, his hand on the door, about to shut it. But the soft click of her own door opening must have reached him, because he hesitated, head tilting slightly before turning fully to face her.

Their eyes collided.

And the first thing she noticed were the bruises—small but unmistakable wounds marring his otherwise perfect face. Red marks along his jaw. A faint cut near his cheekbone. His lower lip was slightly swollen.

She inhaled sharply.

There was only one being he would have fought like this.

Kallias remained silent, waiting for her reaction, and she sighed as she slowly stepped toward him. His fingers twitched on the door handle, as if torn between shutting himself away or—

The door opened.

Silently.

An unspoken invitation.

Y/N stepped inside, and Kallias shut the door behind her, locking it with a quiet click.

Her gaze flickered around the room—cold and grand, yet undeniably his. The heavy drapes of silver and midnight blue, the dark wooden furniture, the ever-present chill of winter that clung to the air but did not touch her skin. A fire crackled low in the hearth, barely illuminating the carved designs along the high ceiling. It was neat, yet something about it felt untouched. As if no one had lived in it for too long.

When she turned back to him, Kallias was still watching her. Silently. Intently.

She exhaled, shaking her head slightly.

“Do you have any tonics or salves?” she asked, voice softer than she expected.

A slow, almost dazed nod. Then, without a word, he turned and led her toward an adjoining washroom.

She took what she needed—her fingers grazing along the neatly arranged bottles, picking out the ones that would soothe the swelling, heal the cuts. Then, guiding him back to the bedroom, she pressed gently on his chest, urging him to sit at the edge of the bed.

Kallias obeyed.

And when she stepped between his legs, pressing a cloth to his jaw, she felt the way his body stiffened beneath her touch. Not from pain—but from something else entirely.

Silence stretched between them, heavy and charged.

Until finally, she whispered, “I take it you’re aware of the situation now?”

A slow nod. Then, just as softly, he whispered back, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Her hand faltered for a second before she resumed dabbing at his jaw.

“What difference would it have made?” she murmured. “You and I… we weren’t that close.”

A mistake.

Because in the next heartbeat, his hand rose—gently but firmly clasping her wrist, halting her movements.

She looked at him, confused, but his grip did not waver.

“If only you ever gave me a chance,” Kallias whispered.

Her breath caught.

“What?”

His eyes burned with something raw, something centuries-old.

“If only you ever looked outside your bubble with Rhysand,” he continued, voice thick with emotion, “and saw me. Saw that I was there for you—heart and soul, every moment, wishing for you to be mine.”

The words slammed into her, knocking the air from her lungs.

She stepped back, barely registering the cloth slipping from her hands.

“What?” she repeated, disbelieving.

Kallias stood, not letting her distance herself.

“Do you know what a painful feeling it is to watch your mate be in love and carry another male’s child?” His voice cracked—just slightly. But his expression remained steady, unwavering. “To give her heart to him?”

Her mouth parted, but no words came out.

Mate.

He knew.

He knew.

“You knew I was your mate?” she breathed, voice barely above a whisper.

A sad, almost broken smile touched his lips.

“I’ve known for nearly two hundred years.”

She felt dizzy.

“I felt it the moment I saw you,” he admitted, his voice dropping lower, more vulnerable. “And since then, I always felt you. Every moment. Every breath. During those fifty years under the mountain, I couldn’t feel you through Amarantha’s magic—but my thoughts were with you. Always with you.”

Her eyes burned.

“And after we were free…” He let out a shuddering breath. “You have no idea how overjoyed I was just to feel you through the bond again.”

He clenched his jaw, shaking his head. “The moment I was told you were pregnant, I wasn’t surprised. But I was still in pain. The weeks and months after that were no different.”

Y/N’s lips trembled.

“But that night,” Kallias whispered. “That night I felt great pain coming from you. And the next day, I had my reply sent to you.”

Her breath hitched.

“The night I found them kissing,” she murmured in realization.

His expression darkened, rage flickering across his face before he took a steady breath.

“I tried keeping this a secret,” he admitted. “I tried my best, Y/N. But…” His voice thickened with emotion. “I have already hidden this for two hundred years. I can’t do this anymore.”

Tears slipped down her cheeks.

“I understand if you need time to process it all,” he whispered. “But please, I hope you won’t be disappointed.”

She didn’t know what to say.

Didn’t know how to respond to this revelation that shattered everything she thought she knew.

“I…” She swallowed hard. “I need time to process. I am… I don’t—I don’t know what to say or do.”

Kallias held her gaze, his eyes filled with something unreadable.

“You don’t need to do anything,” he murmured. “Just be confident in your decision. Whatever it may be.”

She looked away, blinking back the tears.

Then, slowly, she turned toward the door.

She hesitated—just for a moment.

Then left.

And behind her, Kallias stood still in the center of the room, watching her go.

The days passed, but the weight of Kallias’ words did not fade.

If anything, they lingered. Clung to her skin, to her mind, to her soul.

She had not spoken to him about it since that night. Not because she didn’t want to—but because she didn’t know how.

Her mate.

Her mate, and he had known for nearly two hundred years.

She hadn’t known what to do with that information. She still didn’t.

So she had done what she always did. She buried it. She carried on. She let the days slip into nights, avoiding him when she could, enduring the unbearable tension when she couldn’t.

But she felt him everywhere.

Felt him in the way his gaze lingered on her across the dining table. In the way his presence filled the room the second he entered it, like winter itself bending to accommodate his power.

In the way her body, despite her protests, was aware of him.

Kallias, however, did not push.

He did not corner her, did not force her into another conversation about what he had revealed.

But that did not mean the tension between them had lessened. If anything, it had thickened.

And at night, when sleep refused to claim her, her mind would return to him.

How had she never seen it? Never felt it?

The way he looked at her. The way his voice softened ever so slightly when he spoke to her. The way his magic, cool and crisp as fresh snow, had always sought hers.

Rhysand had been her world for so long. She had loved him, given him everything. She had never once thought to look elsewhere.

But now—now, she had to.

And it terrified her.

So when another sleepless night came, when she found herself tossing and turning in her sheets, mind refusing to quiet, she could no longer take it.

A pull.

It tugged at her insides, restless and unrelenting.

She didn’t think. She simply obeyed it.

Throwing back her covers, she slid on a robe over her thin nightgown and padded barefoot out of her room.

The halls were silent, the moonlight casting long shadows along the frost-covered floors.

She didn’t need to wonder where she was going.

She already knew.

Her feet carried her straight to Kallias’ office, the pull within her intensifying the closer she got.

The door was slightly ajar, and when she reached it, she hesitated.

Then, taking a steadying breath, she pushed it open.

He was there.

Sitting behind his grand desk, head buried in documents, the glow of candlelight flickering against his sharp features.

He did not move at first.

But then—he stilled.

As if sensing her.

And when he slowly lifted his head, his piercing blue eyes locked onto hers.

The room suddenly felt too small. Too warm.

And that was when she realized—

She had come in wearing only her nightgown and robe.

A thin nightgown.

One that clung to her, that left very little to the imagination.

His gaze ran over her, darkening as it fell to her now prominent belly, before slowly trailing back up to her face.

She swallowed hard, cursing herself.

His voice was quiet, unreadable. “Y/N.”

She forced herself to clear her throat. Forced herself to hold his stare, despite the way it made her entire body feel like it was burning.

“I…” She inhaled deeply. “I came to ask some questions.”

Kallias did not move. Did not look away.

His gaze remained fixed on her, heavy and waiting.

When she did not immediately continue, he arched a single, silver brow.

“Ask them,” he murmured.

She tried to collect her thoughts, tried to remember why she had come here in the first place.

“Why?” she finally breathed. “Why didn’t you ever tell me?”

His expression did not shift.

But when she kept going, words spilling from her lips in a desperate attempt to understand—

He cut her off.

Smoothly.

Calmly.

“Do you want the answers or not?”

She stopped mid-sentence, mouth slightly parted.

And then—slowly—she nodded.

Kallias rose from his chair.

Her stomach clenched.

His movements were slow, deliberate, as he stepped around the desk, rounding it towards her.

His eyes never left her.

With each step he took, he answered.

“I didn’t tell you,” he said, voice low, steady, intense, “because you were in love with another. Because I wanted you to choose me for me, not because fate dictated it.”

Another step.

“I didn’t tell you,” he continued, “because I saw the way you looked at him. And I knew you never looked at me the same.”

Another step.

Closer.

Her breath hitched, but she did not move.

By the time he stopped, they were chest to chest.

She was close enough to see the faint scar above his eyebrow, close enough to feel the heat radiating off him despite the cold magic always humming beneath his skin.

Her heart pounded.

And when her gaze—without her permission—dropped to his lips, Kallias’ jaw tightened.

“Stop tempting me,” he murmured.

Her breath came unevenly.

“I’m not doing anything,” she whispered.

A low, quiet growl.

“Your existence is enough to tempt me,” he said, his voice raw. “Everything you do. Everything you wear. It tempts me.”

She didn’t know what came over her.

Perhaps it was the way his voice had turned rough, husky.

Perhaps it was the way his hands twitched at his sides, as if restraining themselves from reaching for her.

Perhaps it was the way her own body reacted to him, to his closeness, to the sheer, undeniable pull between them.

An urge.

A reckless, uncontrollable urge to kiss him.

Her fingers twitched.

Her breath mingled with his.

His hands fisted at his sides.

But instead—

Instead, she ran.

She took a sharp step back, nearly stumbling over herself as she turned away and hurried out of the room.

She did not stop.

Not when she reached her chambers.

Not when she collapsed onto her bed, heart racing, skin burning.

She did not stop.

But she cursed herself the entire time.

A month.

It had been a month since she had arrived in Winter.

A month since she had learned the truth.

A month since her world had shifted beneath her feet.

And now—

Now, she was nine months pregnant.

Due any day.

Y/N exhaled slowly, pressing a hand to her swollen belly as she gazed across the gardens of ice and snow.

It was breathtaking. A masterpiece of nature and magic intertwined.

Frozen roses glistened beneath the pale sunlight. Delicate trees, their branches coated in frost, stood tall against the clear blue sky. The air was crisp, biting against her skin, but she welcomed the cold.

It grounded her.

Unlike her thoughts. Unlike the turmoil that had been storming within her since that night in Kallias’ office.

Since she had nearly kissed him.

Since she had run.

She had avoided him even more after that. Refused to be alone with him. Refused to give him the chance to speak to her about what had happened.

But it hadn’t stopped her from feeling him.

Hadn’t stopped her from being aware of him every time he was near.

Hadn’t stopped the dreams.

The ones where his voice, husky and low, whispered to her in the darkness.

Where his hands, warm despite his magic, held her.

Where his lips—

She exhaled sharply, cutting off the thought before it could fully form.

No.

No, she wouldn’t think of that.

She couldn’t.

Instead, she focused on the silence around her. The stillness. The temporary peace that came with the gardens.

Until—

She felt it.

Him.

His presence.

A familiar, steady weight pressing against her senses.

The air seemed to shift, thickening with something unspoken.

And then—

Slow, measured steps against the snow.

She knew it was him before she even turned.

And when she did—

Her breath caught.

Kallias strolled into the gardens with an effortless grace that only he possessed.

His white hair gleamed beneath the sun, tousled just enough to make her wonder if he had run a hand through it in frustration. His sharp jawline was dusted with the barest hint of stubble, making him look unfairly handsome.

He was dressed in his usual pristine attire, the elegant fabric emphasizing his powerful frame.

But it wasn’t just his appearance that made her heart stutter.

It was his eyes.

Icy blue, watching her softly.

Unwavering.

She turned away immediately, forcing herself to focus on the frozen roses once more.

She wouldn’t do this.

Wouldn’t stand here and pretend her body didn’t react to his presence.

Wouldn’t pretend her heart didn’t ache with confusion every time she looked at him.

So she did the only thing she knew how to do.

She tried to leave.

But the moment she took a step forward, his voice—deep, steady, commanding—cut through the air.

"You can't keep running away from everything."

She froze.

Slowly, she turned to face him, her hands tightening around the edges of her robe.

Her lips curled slightly. "I can try."

His expression didn’t change. But something flickered in his eyes.

A mixture of exasperation. And something else. Something deeper.

"You are impossibly stubborn," he murmured, stepping closer.

"And you are impossibly persistent," she shot back, lifting her chin.

A ghost of a smirk touched his lips. "It seems we have that in common, then."

She pressed her lips together, unsure how to respond.

Kallias took another step, his gaze sweeping over her face, then down to her belly.

She expected him to stop there, but his eyes softened—so much it nearly hurt to look at.

"You're due any day now," he murmured.

Her throat tightened. "I know."

Another step.

Closer.

"Are you well?" he asked, voice quieter. "Do you need anything?"

The sincerity in his voice, in his concern, made her pulse stammer.

She opened her mouth, hesitated, then asked the question that had been clawing at her for weeks.

"Why do you care?"

Kallias blinked.

His brows furrowed slightly, as if the question confused him.

Her throat worked as she swallowed.

"The faeling," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. "Why do you care for my baby when you know they are from another male?"

Silence.

A beat passed.

Then another.

And then—

Kallias’ expression softened in a way she had never seen before.

Slowly, he stepped closer.

And before she could move, before she could stop him—

He gently grasped her arms.

His touch was careful. Warm.

And when he spoke, his voice was so quiet, so reverent, that she could hardly breathe.

"Because it is not the baby’s fault to have such a father."

Her chest tightened.

"Because none of this is their fault."

Her vision blurred.

"Because they are yours. And that is all that matters to me."

Her breath shuddered out of her.

Something inside her cracked.

A tear slipped down her cheek before she could stop it.

Kallias’ fingers twitched against her arms.

And then—slowly, hesitantly—he reached up and brushed the tear away with the back of his knuckles.

The touch was light. Barely there.

But it made her stomach flip nonetheless.

She parted her lips, wanting to say something—anything—when—

A throat cleared.

Both of them stiffened.

The moment shattered.

Y/N turned her head—and felt the breath get knocked from her lungs.

Behind the servant standing in the archway of the gardens—

Stood Rhysand.

Her heart stopped.

The servant bowed slightly before addressing Kallias.

"High Lord Rhysand of Night, Your Grace."

The moment the words left the servant’s mouth, Kallias went utterly, dangerously still.

Y/N barely had time to react before Kallias’ arm pressed lightly against her, a silent yet firm movement as he pushed her behind him.

As if shielding her.

As if Rhys was a threat.

Her lips parted, her entire body locking in place as Kallias stepped forward, dismissing the servant without even looking at him.

Rhysand’s violet eyes flickered between them.

Between her.

Between Kallias.

Between where Kallias had moved to shield her.

And in that moment—

In that heartbeat of silence—

She knew.

Everything was about to change.

The air was thick with tension.

Y/N barely breathed as she peeked out from behind Kallias' broad frame, her heart hammering.

Rhysand stood just beyond them, his violet eyes unreadable, his wings tucked in tight, his hands flexing at his sides.

But she saw it.

The hesitation.

The hurt.

The way his gaze flickered—between her, between Kallias, between the space Kallias had deliberately placed between them. Between the connection he clearly saw.

He swallowed, composing himself with a slow inhale before exhaling heavily, his face blanking out.

Finally, he spoke.

"May we…" His voice was quieter than she expected, rough.

A pause.

A hesitation.

He sighed before trying again, voice steadier, though there was something raw beneath it.

"May we have a talk?"

Y/N sucked in a breath.

She felt Kallias tense beside her, his body a solid wall of unwavering strength. His eyes never left Rhys, cold and sharp as ice, watching every move the High Lord of Night made.

But he didn’t stop her.

Didn’t argue when she stepped forward, gently brushing past him.

Still, before she moved completely out of his reach, she turned.

A small, real smile—one just for him.

"Don’t worry," she murmured, holding his gaze. "I need this."

Kallias’ icy blue eyes softened.

A barely-there nod. Understanding.

"I will be nearby," he promised, voice quiet.

But when he turned to Rhys, his gaze hardened, a silent death glare that sent a chill through the air.

Y/N ignored it.

Instead, she led Rhysand a little further away, her posture shifting.

Gone was the hesitance, the uncertainty.

The second she turned to face him again, her entire demeanor changed.

Her voice was sharp. Cold.

"Talk."

Rhysand exhaled, his expression twisting as if it physically pained him to begin.

But he did.

From the start.

From Under the Mountain.

From the moment Amarantha had taken him, from the moment he had felt something shifting deep in his soul, long before Feyre had even arrived to save them.

How he had suspected Feyre was his mate before she had even set foot in that cursed place.

How the bond had begun pulling at him, whispering, nudging, long before she had even known him.

How, during every trial Feyre endured, during every moment of her suffering, his instincts screamed at him—protect her, protect her, protect her.

How, by the time she had finally saved them all, finally broken the curse—

"By then," he murmured, his voice nearly shaking, "I already felt the bond snap into place for me."

Y/N stilled.

A cold, hollow silence stretched between them.

Rhys swallowed.

"So when I arrived back home—to you. To Mor. I already knew."

A sharp, bitter laugh left her lips.

Of course.

Of course.

Her heart clenched, but she smiled—a twisted, cold thing.

"I should’ve known."

Rhys flinched.

"Because you weren’t yourself from the moment you came back."

Her voice wavered, but she didn’t stop.

"Always hesitating to touch me. Always distracted. Always—" She let out another humorless laugh, shaking her head. "I’m surprised I’m even pregnant right now."

Rhys’ jaw clenched, shame clouding his features.

"Y/N—"

"Save it," she snapped.

But he didn’t stop.

He explained everything.

Why he kept disappearing at night.

Why he had been gone for days at a time.

How, when Feyre and Tamlin were about to be wed, the bond had pulled him to her so strongly that he had to interfere—had to take her.

How he had been with her every time he was not with Y/N.

And how he had hidden it.

Lied.

Made her doubt herself.

Her hands curled into fists.

Her voice was softer when she spoke next, but it was far colder.

"All this time," she murmured.

Rhys stilled.

"All this time," she repeated, her voice shaking just slightly, "I had eyes only for you."

Her breath hitched.

"And yet—"

She met his gaze, let him see the truth in her eyes.

"Kallias has been my true mate all along."

Rhysand froze.

His entire body went rigid.

"What?"

A small, cruel smile touched her lips.

"You heard me."

Rhys shook his head slightly, as if trying to process it.

As if he hadn’t even considered it.

"Kallias is my mate," she continued, voice firm.

And this time, she felt it—the truth of the words, settling into her very bones.

Rhys looked… devastated.

"I—" He faltered.

But she didn’t care.

"I understand," she said, voice cold, "that Feyre is your mate."

Her fingers clenched at her sides.

"Because now that I have found my mate—" Her voice wavered. "I know what it feels like."

Rhys opened his mouth, but she cut him off.

"But hiding it?" Her eyes burned. "Making me doubt myself? Hate myself? Making me feel like I was losing you because of something I did?"

Her voice cracked.

"I won’t ever forgive you for that."

Rhysand flinched as if struck.

But she wasn’t done.

"But we have a child together."

His gaze snapped to hers.

"At least tell me," she said, her voice barely above a whisper, "that you will be a good father to them."

Rhys’ lips parted, his expression crumbling.

"Of course," he breathed, "of course, I will—"

But before he could finish, before he could even take a step forward—

Y/N gasped.

Pain. Sharp and sudden.

She clutched her stomach.

Her knees nearly buckled.

"My—" She gasped again, her body tensing.

Rhys’ eyes went wide.

"Y/N?"

"My water—" Her breath hitched. "The baby—the baby is coming!"

Chaos erupted.

Before she could even register what was happening, Kallias was there.

Instant. Immediate.

Rhys barely had time to react before Kallias shoved him aside, reaching for her.

"I’ve got you," Kallias murmured, his arms strong as he lifted her effortlessly into his hold.

She barely registered Rhys following as Kallias carried her inside, barking orders.

Midwives. Midwives were summoned at once, servants scrambling.

She clung to Kallias, her breath sharp, her body burning as the contractions began to intensify.

"I’m here," Kallias murmured against her forehead.

Her vision blurred.

"You’re not alone, starlight."

Rhys followed.

Kallias did not acknowledge him.

Not as he carried her into her chambers.

Not as he lowered her onto the prepared bed.

Not as he whispered, over and over, words only meant for her.

Words of comfort.

Words of devotion.

Words that Rhysand would never say again.

The room was dimly lit, the scent of lavender and fresh linens thick in the air as Y/N lay on the soft sheets, utterly exhausted. But despite the ache in her body, despite the whirlwind of emotions that had led up to this moment, her heart was full—because in her arms lay a tiny, fragile miracle.

Her daughter.

She traced the baby’s delicate features, her small nose, her plump little lips, the faintest dusting of dark lashes against rosy cheeks. She was warm, impossibly tiny, and perfect.

Rhysand sat in the chair beside the bed, unusually silent. He had not left. He had not even tried to. Instead, he was staring at their child with something so raw in his expression that, for the first time in a long while, Y/N saw him not as her betrayer but as a father.

“She has your nose,” Rhys murmured after a long pause, his voice hoarse with exhaustion and emotion.

Y/N huffed softly, tilting her head. “But your lips,” she countered, smoothing a thumb over the baby’s pout.

Rhys gave a small, breathless chuckle, his violet eyes bright as he leaned in just a little closer. “And your cheeks. She’s going to be so beautiful, just like her mother.”

For a fleeting second, a warm, nostalgic peace settled between them. An understanding. An unspoken acknowledgment of the life they had created together.

Then Y/N’s expression hardened. “Now that you have a daughter, you better pray she never meets a male like you.”

Rhys inhaled sharply, clearly stung. But instead of responding with guilt, his lips pressed into a determined line, his violet eyes flashing with something fiercely protective. “I would kill any male who ever hurt my princess.” He softened immediately after, gently extending his hands. “May I?”

Y/N hesitated but eventually nodded. She watched as Rhys cradled their daughter in his arms, his touch reverent, as if he were holding something sacred.

He was utterly enchanted, whispering soft words to the little girl, pressing the lightest kiss to her forehead. And for a moment, Y/N could see the father he was meant to be—the father he would be.

But she could not let that soften her resolve.

“I believe by now you know,” she murmured, folding her hands over her lap, “that I will be staying here permanently. With my mate.”

Rhys visibly tensed. His gaze flickered to her, pain swimming in his violet eyes. “Y/N…���

She shook her head, unwilling to hear whatever argument he might have.

Instead, Rhys exhaled sharply, adjusting the baby in his arms. “When she comes to Velaris, you too—”

“Not now.” Y/N cut him off, her voice firm. “I won’t be coming anytime soon.”

His lips parted slightly, as if he wanted to protest, but he swallowed it down.

Y/N, however, turned her full attention back to her baby, brushing a finger over her tiny fingers, smiling as they wrapped around hers. In a playful, sing-song voice, she cooed, “But Uncles Cas and Az, and Aunties Mor and Amren—they are always welcome here, aren’t they? Yes, they are.”

Rhys sucked in a slow breath. She saw the way it gutted him, the way his shoulders slumped ever so slightly. But he nodded. “Of course.”

They spoke a little longer, quietly agreeing on how they would co-parent, what would be best for the child. But when Rhys finally murmured, “Y/N… I am so sorry. And Feyre is also—”

She didn’t let him finish.

“Save it,” she said coldly, her gaze snapping back to his. “You may leave now. You saw the baby. Come back tomorrow, if you will. Or don’t. I don’t care.”

Rhys looked like he had a thousand more things to say, but he only nodded slowly, gently placing the baby back in Y/N’s arms before standing. He hesitated at the door.

“Call Kallias in,” she ordered, her voice unrelenting.

Rhys turned to leave without another word.

And the moment Kallias entered the room, Y/N’s body instinctively relaxed.

He was by her side in an instant, his ice-blue eyes full of nothing but love as he settled beside her, tucking a strand of damp hair from her face.

“She’s perfect,” he murmured, gazing down at the baby. “Just like her mother.”

Y/N exhaled a soft laugh, her lips curving up. And as she looked at him, at his pure, unwavering devotion, she felt a shift deep within herself. A warmth. A certainty.

“I accept,” she whispered.

Kallias stilled, his brows drawing together slightly.

She lifted her gaze to meet his. “I accept you as my mate, Kal. And I’m so sorry I never paid you the attention you deserved before.”

Kallias blinked, stunned for only a second before his expression softened into something radiant, something home. He reached for her free hand, bringing it to his lips, pressing a tender kiss to her knuckles.

“You have nothing to apologize for, my love,” he murmured, cradling both her and their child in his arms. “You’re here now. That’s all that matters.”

A tear slipped down Y/N’s cheek, but for the first time in months, it was not from pain.

Kallias leaned down, brushing a feather-light kiss to her lips. It was slow, lingering, full of unspoken promises.

When he pulled away, he smirked, his thumb tracing circles along the back of her hand. “Get well soon, my beautiful High Lady. I have a coronation to plan for you.”

Y/N let out a disbelieving laugh.“You seriously would do that?”

He only grinned. “You deserve it. The Night Court never deserved you.”

Y/N’s heart clenched, and she leaned into him as he cocooned her and their daughter in his arms.

Kallias pressed another kiss to her temple and whispered, “But before that… our mating ceremony.”

Y/N giggled softly, curling into him.

Home.

She had finally found home.

----------------------------------------------------------

Taglist: @mega-hardcollectionobservat-blog @acinnamongirlsdiary @fantanbietssonblogg @saddiebaddie14 @myarmytinyzen @hjgdhghoe @bluebries81 @jaybbygrl @jangmi-latte @itsnerdgirl6044 @noonenuts @justthingzsblog @minaaminaa8 @barb00235 @willowpains @holb32 @readinggeeklmao @miliokumura3 @tayswhp @acourtofbatboydreams @asweetblueberry2 @6v6babycheese @historygeekqueen @starryhiraeth @slutforaz @goldenfrapucino @tothestarsandwhateverend

[geniemillies]

is this your high lord??

these were supposed to be for my friend but i thought i'd share it so here you go, some shitpost doodles of hls 🫶

tamlin in that meeting:

unapologetically

no explanation..

AND A NESTA- because she reminded me of the caption..

[eklaize]

"His eyes closed to just feel. Snippets of verse floated through his mind.  

In the columned halls, we embrace

His cheek rests against mine  

Happiness like this comes once

in a thousand years"

Captive Prince by C.S.Pacat

Erasmus and Kallias, our tragic lovers.

[pegasus-anarchy]

POV: You propose Rhysand should be High King.

[laur-the-cat-prince]

[really-fanny-longbottom]

a song of darkness & ice

summary: azriel finally found the one for him but some things never go as planned. the good news? happy endings are real.

warnings: fluff, mentions of death, grieving

pairings: azriel x reader

words: 3.5k

"azriel."

azriel was doing it again. 

he was looking at you once again like he had for the past two years.

but it wasn't his fault.

"azriel."

how could it be his fault?

how could he not look at you when you were the most beautiful female his hazel eyes had ever seen? 

"azriel."

how could he not look at you when every time you smiled at him or laughed at something he said his heart erupted? 

how could he not look at you when you were his first thought when he woke up and his last before falling asleep? 

"azriel!"

"huh?" azriel asked with his eyes still focused on you.

rhys and cassian couldn't contain the chuckles that escaped them.

what they were seeing was a rare sight. they had never seen their brother act this way.

not once.

rhys and cassian were well aware of how hard azriel could be on himself, how undeserving he felt he was of genuine love and true happiness.

even though the two of them had assured azriel multiple times that he was more than worthy — that his past didn't define him — he still had some trouble believing it. 

since they were children, azriel has always been the quiet, reserved, and introverted one.

with the exception of his relationships with the inner circle and now with the archeron sisters, all his other relationships had been only in passing — mainly with females.

cassian and rhys knew how much azriel wanted to find his mate, especially now that both his brothers had theirs.

but his interest in females never lasted. It never went beyond the interest of a casual night. there was never anyone who made him wish for something more.

until now.

until you show up. 

you turned azriel's world upside down along with his perspective on life.

before, the simple and basic things in life didn't impress him — for him they were nothing more than futile things. 

but now. . .since you came into his life, azriel has found himself appreciating those same things that he thought had no value or importance not so long ago.

it's as if you were the missing piece in his puzzle.

and now that he found you, his life had more color, more life and more meaning.

he couldn't be more grateful that the Mother guided him to meet you. the only thing he was sorry for was that it had taken so long.

"azriel." cassian said, placing a hand on the male's arm.

finally, azriel removed his hazel eyes from you and met his brother's "what?"

azriel saw that both of his brothers were looking at him with big smiles on their faces and with looks that he knew all too well. "what is it?" 

"i'm afraid you're in love, brother." rhys told him as he took a sip of his whiskey.

"what? what the hell are you talking about?" he questioned with his eyebrows furrowed.  

"oh please, don't act like you don't know, az. you spent the whole night looking at y/n." cassian said with amusement in his voice.

"i don't know what you're talking about, cass" azriel ignored his brothers' laughter and got up from the sofa to approach the table to refill his glass.

as he drank from his glass, he felt the alcohol burning his throat as his eyes searched the room for you again. 

but truth to be told, his eyes didn't even have to scan the room to find you. 

you had changed seats since the last time he looked at you, now, you were at the foot of the appetizer table while talking to your brother.

he finally had the perfect view of your dress and as always you looked beautiful.

just like the first time he saw you.

the day he met you was without a doubt in second place of his favorite days — he was saving the first place for the day he would gain the courage to ask you for a date and you would say yes. 

azriel met you during a meeting — a meeting he didn't even want to go to but changed his mind at the last minute. thanks to the mother for that. 

rhys, along with cassian and azriel, went to the winter court for a meeting with your older brother — kallias.

the night court was trying to strengthen their alliances with all the other courts after the events of under the mountain. 

the courts were still fragile and their high lords were suspicious, especially kallias and his court, but no one could judge them. after all, they were the ones who suffered the greatest loss of all.  

kallias took advantage of the meeting to give them a guided tour of his court. 

the visit began in the ice palace with the colors blue, white and gray predominating, large diamond chandeliers hung in the throne room and ballroom, snowflake-shaped faelights illuminated the rooms and sofas covered in soft fur offered comfortable seats.

then they went to the frozen garden with its frozen lake for skating and a greenhouse with its flowers preserved by the cold.

next it was time for the cold forest where they saw several foxes, wolves, reindeer and rabbits with their white fluff and people moving by sleds on the path that led to the city and finally the polar bear caves.  

the caves were a thirty-minute walk from the palace and their entrances were located on the wall of the mountain and had to climb a path to get there. 

down here, they had a large area of land for the bears to roam around with an unfrozen river on the northside that provided them with unlimited fish for food. on the far side, near the trees, there was a hut where the bears' armor was kept. 

azriel counted more than twenty bears that were there when he and his brothers arrived, not counting those that were still inside the caves. 

his favorite part was the cubs playing with each other and the ones trying to catch fish in the river. 

he also saw some people — no doubt soldiers by their uniforms — training bears who had their copper armor on. 

kallias was in the middle of explaining the bears' armor, saying that those who wore copper were because they had just begun their training when a loud and powerful roar sounded through the air which made the trees vibrate and the ground shake. 

silence fell around the place and after a few seconds, azriel heard a guard shout "it's the princess!"

guards began to run towards the gate that was located on the opposite side of the river to prevent intruders from entering and began to pull the levers.

in the distance, a large white figure emerged, getting closer by the second — it was a bear in silver armor and a matching helmet — and on top of the bear, was you.  

the gate was still being opened by the time you got close to it and without wanting to wait, the bear jumped through the gate making a perfect landing on the inside and scaring the guards into falling to the ground in the process. 

"always showing off" kallias murmured at the entrance that his little sister had just made. 

rhys, cassian and azriel were too busy looking at you and the bear to laugh at the high lord's words.

everybody was. all eyes were on you. the guards had stopped, the soldiers had stopped, even the three members of the night court had found it impossible not to look at you.

especially a certain shadowsinger. when he saw you and your bear, a shiver went down his back. 

this bear was incomparable to the others. it was the biggest bear they had ever seen and without a doubt it was the strongest. 

the bear's legs were about the same size as an adult male. It was amazing.

azriel noticed the insignia that was stamped on the bear's helmet. "what does that mean?" 

"that's mal. she is the leader of the bears and the insignia marks her as such." kallias replied with a smile directed at you. 

the four males had to take several steps back to allow the bear to pass and they both had to look up to see you with your own armor that matched the bear's. 

they saw you dismount from the bear and she lowered herself to allow you to reach the ground.

when you landed safely, you turned around to come face to face with your bear and when she lowered her head, you placed a kiss there followed by a "good job, mal. take a rest, i'll see you tomorrow."  

mal made a small grunt in response and nuzzled her head against you before moving forward and going to the guards to have her armor removed. 

you started walking towards the males while taking off your gloves and kallias giving orders for everyone to summarize their work. 

as soon as you got close enough, you greeted them "brother. handsome illyrian males that i never seen before." 

kallias rolled his eyes at the same time as the three males laughed "don't you mean 'hello, high lord of the night court?"

you smiled at your brother's words and held out a hand for rhys to shake, "hello, handsome high lord of the night court."  

and for the first time in prythian history, rhys blushed. cassian and azriel widened their eyes at the sight of their blushing brother, never had they witnessed such a thing.

"princess," rhys greeted after clearing his throat a little embarrassedly "this is cassian, my general,"

"princess," he shook your hand and gave you a small nod of his head with a smile.

"handsome general” your smile widened at the laugh he let out. 

"and this is azriel, my spymaster."

when you moved to stand face to face with the hazel-eyed male, his breath caught in his throat.

you were unbelievably beautiful. as if you were sculpted by the mother herself. 

you looked a lot like kallias. the same hair, the same eyes and the same nose but you had something that he didn't have — gracefulness.

the moment your eyes met each other, they locked and neither you nor the male in front of you dared to look away.

"what's going on?" kallias asked in a whisper, not liking the way you two looked at each other. 

upon realizing what exactly was happening, rhys placed a hand on kallias' shoulder and the two males walked away with cassian right behind them with a smile on his face. 

you could hear rhys in the distance asking more about bear armor to keep your brother busy. 

without ever breaking eye contact, azriel took your hand and said to you "my princess," before giving you a kiss on it.

"pretty azriel," you replied back with your eyes still locked on the male's.

azriel blushed so much that he could feel his cheeks warm. 

you cleared your throat and assumed a relaxed expression again and with an ironic smile you asked the blushing male "so you are the famous shadowsinger," with a nod from him, you continued "do you sing?" 

"what?" he felt taken by surprise. never in the five hundred years of his life had anyone asked him such a thing.

"you are a shadowsinger. do you sing to your shadows?" 

azriel didn't know what to say.

"for example, if you want them to bring you something, you sing a melody, but if you want them to attack someone, you sing a melody. . . more aggressive?" 

there was a minute of silence, two and then. . . azriel's laughter filled the air around you.

azriel still remembers how much he laughed that day. no one had ever made him laugh like that. he laughed until his stomach hurt and some tears escaped his eyes. 

that's how it all started.

he could hardly believe that two years had passed since that day.

one of the happiest he's ever had.

what Azriel didn't know was that at the sound of his laughter, rhys and cassian exchanged looks, knowing exactly that you were the one for him. 

after asking him those questions, you invited him to drink iced tea, which, to azriel's surprise, he really liked. 

azriel visited you a few times after that until you were the one visiting the night court when your brother finally relented.

when you found out that cassian was training the valkyries, you joined the group.

the day after you joined training, the spymaster volunteered to help train the valkyries. coincidence? of course not. 

you stayed at the house of the wind, giving you and azriel the opportunity to build a beautiful friendship. 

a friendship that azriel always wished would become something more. 

you flirted with each other, you went out just the two of you, you always sat next to each other and you were the first pair to dance at last year's starfall. 

there was just one problem.

a few nights ago, after a night of games, you and azriel remained in the living room while the others retired to sleep.

the conversation flowed while you drank wine and laughed, but it was then that azriel decided to take the next step, whether it was the wine that gave him courage he doesn't know.  

when he approached with the intention of kissing you, you moved away.

you quickly apologized and fled to your room, leaving a very confused azriel.

since then, azriel had gone through every moment with you in his head trying to understand what had gone wrong.

did he misread the signs? could it be that there weren't even signs and he imagined them? 

he drank his whiskey in one gulp and turned to refill it, when azriel turned around again, you were no longer there.

kallias was now sitting next to viviane with one hand on her growing belly. 

when searching the entire room, azriel didn't see a single sign of you. 

it was then that he walked forward and caught your figure on the balcony enjoying the stars and the gentle night breeze. 

azriel wanted nothing more than to join you but with your behavior the last few days, he didn't want to exceed your limits. 

it was at that moment that azriel realized. if he really had crossed your boundaries that night when he tried to kiss you, then he needs to apologize. 

when his hand grabbed the handle of the door leading to the balcony, azriel noticed that it was shaking and had to take a few deep breaths to calm his pounding heart. 

without further hesitation, azriel opened the door and closed it behind him again.  

when you didn't move, not even to look back, azriel approached the balcony wall until he was next to you and as soon as he did he hid his shaking hands in his pockets.

the two of you remained silent for a moment, enjoying the view of the city that shone under the stars and the gentle breeze that traveled through your bodies.

azriel was the first to say "i wanted to apologize for the other night," at the sound of his voice, you turned to look at him and he did the same "i shouldn't have tried to kiss you. i overstepped your limits and i'm sorry." 

you remained looking at him and without giving him an answer, you turned your attention to the city again.

assuming you weren't going to talk to him, azriel turned his back and started to make his way back into the house.  

"you didn't do anything wrong." your voice intertwined with the breeze and made the hazel-eyed male stop in his tracks. 

with his back still facing you, you proceeded "i wanted to kiss you and that's what scared me" your voice was shaking and azriel noticed that, which was the reason he faced you. 

you took a deep breath and after calming your heart, you finally revealed the truth "these last few days," you took a step forward "i wasn't ignoring you and I'm sorry if it seemed like i was. i just needed time to be able to think about how to tell you."

"tell me what?" the male's voice came out just a little louder than a whisper. 

you hesitated and your heart started racing again, reaching azriel's ears, but you didn't let that stop you from continuing.

"i'm not your mate, azriel," pain and suffering appeared on your features in the face of this new revelation "and a bond will never snap between us."

"how do y-"

"because i lost my mate fifty-two years ago," tears came to your eyes but you didn't let them fall, "he died to save me."  

azriel approached you and took your hands in his, encouraging you to continue. 

"his name was malik." 

"malik?" azriel asked you, "like mal?"  

a weak smile appeared on your lips "yes. mal was my nickname for him. he was fascinated by polar bears and his dream was to one day be able to see one." 

the smile disappeared, and you moved your eyes away from azriel's before speaking again "i met him one evening when i tried to sneak out of the palace so that i wouldn't have to attend another ball. when i tried to climb down the ice wall of the palace, i ended up slipping and falling right on top of him." you laughed at the memory, azriel joined you.

"he was a soldier in training and was on patrol when i fell. a rumor spread that he had saved me from an 'accidental fall' and kallias appointed him as my personal guard as a thank you." 

"we fell in love and a few months after we started our relationship, our mating bond snapped," you began to caress your ring finger and for the first time azriel noticed a barely noticeable ring mark "after i accepted the bond, it didn't take him long to ask me to marry him."

"i'm so sorry." azriel told you while passing a hand through your hair to give you some comfort.

your face became sadder and your voice weaker and quieter "he's the reason i didn't die when amarantha's creatures invaded my court. he was the one who got me out of the palace and took me to viviane safely." 

"when we were arriving at the camp that viviane established, a large group of those creatures appeared. without thinking twice, he pushed me into viv's arms and ordered her to get me out of there." your voice cracked and you needed a few seconds to compose yourself.

"i tried to get viv to let go of me but she didn't. a few moments later i saw him fall," your eyes returned to azriel, "he didn't get up."

tears now flowed freely down your cheeks "i felt the bond disappearing and my heart splitting in two. when the creatures were gone, i went back there and buried him," you wiped away some of the tears, "he never saw a polar bear." azriel's heart ached in hearing your words. 

"after him, i never had any interest in being with anyone again. until you show up." 

Surprise flashed across azriel's eyes, he wasn't expecting to hear this. 

"what?"

"i tried so hard not to fall in love with you these last two years but failed completely." 

a smile formed on the shadowsinger's face and he moved closer to you with his hands finding their places on your cheeks. 

"what made you hold back?" he asked quietly.

"your job," seeing the shock on his face, you rested your hands on his wrists and explained, "your job is dangerous, azriel. i already lost the male i loved once and i refuse to go through another pain like that." 

azriel's heart tightened knowing that the reason you didn't like his job wasn't because of what he had to do but because of the fact that it could cost you the most important thing to you — him.  

"you won't lose me." azriel assured you.

"you don't know that." 

"you're right. I don't, but i promise," he held you a little tighter to let you know how honest he was being, "i promise that whenever i leave for a mission, i will always and i mean always do everything i can to come back to you. i promise."

you both smiled at the feeling of the tattoo being formed on azriel's forearm and on your rib. 

6ou were too involved in the moment that you weren't even curious about the shape of the tattoos that linked you for the rest of your lives.

a promise that azriel would do anything to never break it.

as concern filled your eyes, azriel caressed your cheeks with his thumbs before asking you what was bothering you. 

"what about your mate? i know how much you want one." azriel could hear your heart beating unevenly.

the smile returned to his lips and in a long time, azriel finally knew what he wanted "i don't want a mate. i don't want a mating bond. i just want you."

the rush of his heartbeat reached your ears and it comforted you to know that you weren't the only one nervous. 

"then i'm yours."

and with a kiss beneath prythian's brightest stars, your love was sealed.

a/n: thank you for reading!

masterlist

general taglist: @emryb @fantasyandshit @azrielover @shadowsingercassia @brieflyclassymortal @lilah-asteria @lure-of-writing @pruvii @olive-main @mybestfriendmademe @anuttellaa @lively-potter @meul-a @mrsjna @avajustreads @littlelou22 @talesofadragon @circe143 @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @dark-chaos-314 @tequilya @scoliobean @saltedcoffeescotch @charlotteintumbleland

the beautiful dividers belong to @cafekitsune

[nestaians]

if what rhysand said was true, that there was another daemati working for amarnatha then how come no one besides rhysand knew about this daemati?

where was this daemati when amarnatha died? shouldn’t have tamlin come across this person during the time he was working with hybern? why did no one question rhysand more about this?

why didn’t kallias ask for a name so he could track this daemati down and make them pay for killing winter court’s children?

why didn’t rhysand offer any information about this daemati? all he said was “that wasn’t me, it was another daemati and i am sorry” and that was it. they let it go?

aren’t fae children said to be rare? isn’t murdering children in cold blood a serious crime? why was there no justice for them?

[ladydeath-vanserra]

Kallias and Viviane let Rhysand off the hook a little too easy about the Winter Court children. They're just supposed to believe it was another Daemati when Rhysand was tormenting them all UtM and Rhysand couldn't even provide the name of this other Daemati? All this evidence against him and they just believe his word? just like that?

[ourhighladysarahjmaas]

[azrielsshadows42]

ACOTAR Names + Meanings

I was scrolling on Pinterest and fell into a rabbit hole; the result was finding the meaning behind the names of the acotar characters. I have decided to share this information with the rest of the fandom

Rhysand = In the Bible it means perfection/bringer of darkness, it can also mean Enthusiasm.

Feyre = Fair, beautiful and light-haired, origin: Old French. It can also mean bringer of gifts

Nyx = Named after a Greek goddess who was known as the personification of night.

Azriel = In Hebrew it means 'God is my help' Though if spelt Azrael, it then means 'Angel of death' in the Bible.

Cassian = Son of Cassius (Cassius was a Roman general) in Latin and Irish origin. It also means Empty/hollow, cinnamon and curly-headed

Morrigan = I was shocked when her name didn't actually mean truth. Her name comes from a goddess of Irish and Celtic mythology, It means Phantom Queen, and she was the 'bringer of death'

Amren = 'Mighty Nation' in Hebrew

Nesta = Means many things, in Welsh it means 'pure', in Jamaica and Greece it means 'returner' and in Italy it means 'integrity'

Elaine = Sunray or shining light also has French origins

Helion = The Sun or a troublesome/mischievous person.... it also means 'Cattle shelter' though I don't think that was the aim

Thesan = Named after a sky goddess often depicted with a pair of wings, her name most commonly translates to 'Dawn' but can also mean illumination

Kallias = mans name legit means 'beauty' in Greek, you just know Vivianne is a lucky female.

Vivianne = also has many meanings, in French, lively. In Latin, alive. In Hungarian/Irish, joyous, energetic and free

Beron = Bear lol

Eris = This is what the Greeks would name their baby to help embrace their dark, mischievous side, it means 'strife' or 'fight' referring to the Greek Goddess of discord, contention and rivalry

Lucien = Meaning 'Light' cause he's Helion's son, was right in front of us the whole time

Tarquin = Meaning 'Ancient Roman Ruler' with Latin origins

Varian = Variable... and apparently the first name of some American hero

Tamlin = Independence, origin: South Africa

Amarantha = Unfading flower, which is what they used to call her before she was known as the deceiver

[lainalit]

Made a (vibe based) height chart for the seven High Lords since I never saw one for them

[mika-no-sekai-blog]

ACOTAR:

With the Last Breath (Azriel x reader) - completed

Game (Azriel x reader) | Game over

Masterlist (Tamlin x reader) -completed

Masterlist (Eris x reader) - completed

Masterlist (Kallias x reader; Kallias x Viviane) - ongoing

[dawneternal]

What I think the acotar characters smell like

Emerie - woodsmoke, herbal tea

Gwyn - honeysuckle, warm rain

Clotho - sweet mint, parchment

Tarquin - sea salt, lime, coconut

Eris - brown sugar, whiskey, smoke

Helion - vetiver, saffron, magnolia

Thesan - apricot, sage

Kallias - vanilla, cedar, snowdrop

Vivianne - violets, sugar plum, fresh snow

Tamlin - moss, lily of the valley, blackberry

Lucien - Leather, bergamot

Lady of Autumn - clementine, clove, amber

Beron - tobacco, cider, oak

Nuala and Cerridwen - moonflower, peach, sandalwood

Rhysand's mom - cardamom, moonflower

[shadowqueenjude]

Let's make this very clear: Tamlin beats Azriel, Thesan beats Azriel, Tarquin beats Azriel, Helion beats Azriel, Rhysand beats Azriel, Beron beats Azriel, Kallias beats Azriel, Lucien beats Azriel, Bryce beats Azriel, hell I'd even pick Eris against Azriel. The high lord meeting had strange magical boundaries but outside of that environment Eris wins by virtue of fire. High Lords aren't merely powerful. They are power. If you took a moment to think beyond "Azriel has a big dick!" you would realize that Azriel's shadows recoiling from Bryce's soft light is a CLEAR SIGN that light and fire would absolutely destroy him and he's NOT AS POWERFUL AS YOU THINK.

[honeybeefae]

Happy Father’s Day to

The Dads: Rhysand, Tarquin, Thesan, Tamlin

The Daddies: Lucien, Kallias, Cassian, Varian

The Daddiest: Helion, Eris, Lucien, Azriel, Suriel