#Jacque Snicket

[astheworldgoesonitswickedway]

Olivia Caliban’s (Netflix version) perspective. Still so sad she never got her happy ending with Jacque. 🥺

All my life I waited,

For some great chance to take,

For a way to matter,

An important difference to make.

So I gave my whole life,

When he showed me the path,

How could I know,

There was no stopping their wrath.

We lost one another,

When we could finally see,

A love born out of time,

Simply not meant to be.

I lost them too,

After so long in fighting,

To put out the fires,

We could see lighting.

I’ll be right behind you,

That’s what I said,

But it was a lie,

My blood was already shed.

It was far, far too late,

We knew someone would die,

For those lions and villains,

So I said my goodbye.

I was always just behind,

Running and never reaching,

Never able to provide them a life,

Beyond hiding and seeking.

Perhaps I have saved them,

The best way I could,

Perhaps they’re still out there,

Surviving as V.F.D. would.

[lokiprincess]

Lemony Snicket, The Beatrice Letters

[fuckinglemoniestoflemon]

VFD Yearbook

[aseriesofunfortunatetexts]

asoue + tumblr

[tealin]

@afterthegreatunknown, it's your lucky day ...

[oh-look-another]

there’s something about sibling relationships in asoue/atwq that is just,,, unique, for lack of a better word. or maybe wholesome. because most siblings in the snicketverse are like,,, in threes. the snickets. the baudelaires. the denouments. the quagmires. hell, even the white-faced women. it probably means something. i’m too tired too figure out what. it’s just something about them. like i could maybe analyse them tomorrow when i’ve had a good night’s sleep but for now have some of my ramblings.

[fizzcosplays]

HOW ARE THESE THE SAME ACTORS

LIKE I RECOGNIZE NATHAN BUT NPH?!

Anyway I love ASOUE

[jeaninesfavouriteserum]

me 🤝 slipping v.f.d. into everyday conversations and praying someone understands me

[panic-at-the-general-vicinity]

Just realized Lemony Snicket was the youngest of three and is now the oldest of three don’t talk to me

[hayleythesugarbowl]

masterlist ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧ 🎀 ˚

looking for a specific fandom? i present, my specific masterlists…

╰┈➤ {smosh • friends • thomas barrow • ray manchester }

➳ requests are closed

➳ some facts about me! my name is hayley and i’m just a silly little fangirl who loves reading, writing, drinking tea, feeling nostalgic, and obsessing over + living vicariously through fictional characters

➳ my goal on this blog is to write for everyone i can because i know the feeling of looking up a fic and finding it doesn’t exist and i feel like i owe it to my twelve y/o (and current!!) obsessive self to fill the void. that’s basically it— i write to fill the void 💌

➳ find the list of fandoms i write for at the bottom of this post

➳ feel free to ask anything and i hope you have a lovely day/night 🍓🩰

╰┈➤ masterlist after the cut!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~°~❦~°~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

fluff: ♡ angst: ✧ requested: ☽

ˋ°•*⁀➷ oneshots + series ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹˚

ray manchester…

╰┈➤ Stuck || Ray Manchester/Captain Man x reader • ☽

word count: 3.5k warnings: none summary: you, an aspiring-fashion-designer, get trapped in an elevator with captain man on your way to a job interview

╰┈➤ Secret Identity || Ray Manchester/Captain Man x reader • ☽ ♡

word count: 3.8k warnings: i think i cursed once summary: you and ray have been dating in secret, due to your shyness and secret identity, but when there’s a change in your relationship, it may be time to let everyone know

╰┈➤ My Valentine || Ray Manchester/Captain Man x reader • ☽ ♡

word count: 3.8k warnings: none summary: when you start working at junk n’ stuff, ray is immediately attracted to you and wants to do something special for you on valentine’s day

monica geller…

╰┈➤ The One With Phoebe’s Sister || Monica Geller x reader • ☽

word count: 3.1k warnings: none summary: phoebe introduces the friends to you, her younger sister, you are instantly attracted to monica but don’t know that monica is equally smitten with you

joey tribbiani…

╰┈➤ The One With the Baby Girl || Joey Tribbiani x reader • ☽ ♡

word count: 1k warnings: childbirth summary: joey helps you through the birth of your daughter

╰┈➤ The One With The Pie || Joey Tribbiani x reader • ✧☽

word count: 6.6k warnings: some references summary: after your crush on joey ends before it can begin, you start to move on. but maybe, just maybe, the story of you and joey isn’t over just yet

╰┈➤ The One With the Ex || Joey Tribbiani x reader • ✧☽

word count: 3.2k warnings: presumed cheating, drinking, suggestive material  summary: after joey cheats on you and breaks your heart in high school, you run into him again years later and find out the past might not be exactly what you thought it was

remus lupin…

╰┈➤ In This Together || Remus Lupin x reader • ♡✧

word count: 2.1k warnings: none summary: when remus resigns from the position of dada teacher and leaves hogwarts, he decides it’s finally time to tell you the truth about himself and his ‘furry little problem’

╰┈➤ Stolen Glances || Remus Lupin x student!reader • ✧☽

word count: 3.1k warnings: age gap but it’s legal summary: remus finds himself drawn to you against his better judgement even though you are one of his students

tim bradford…

╰┈➤ Nightlight || Tim Bradford x reader • ✧☽

word count: 10.3k warnings: abusive past relationship, reader kind of has a panic attack, mild language, blood, guns, inaccurate police stuff summary: when you encounter a man while on patrol who has a threatening message from your ex, your TO, Tim, offers to spend the night with you

john nolan…

╰┈➤ Daddy Cop || John Nolan x reader • ☽

word count: 1.2k warnings: mild language, reader has a thing for cops summary: you go to visit john at work and see him in uniform for the first time

ian hecox…

╰┈➤ First Fake Date || Ian Hecox x reader • ♡☽

word count: 2.5k warnings: none summary: Ian finds out his ex-girlfriend is going to be at an upcoming event and when you volunteer to go as his fake-date things don’t go quite as either of you planned

╰┈➤ More Than Friends || Ian Hecox x reader • ♡☽

word count: 3.5k warnings: mild cursing summary: you have been ignoring your growing feelings for your best friend ian, but when you are chosen to do a romantic scene together will those feelings stay hidden?

╰┈➤ Fishy || Ian Hecox x reader • ♡☽

word count: 1.8k warnings: none summary: you and ian have been dating for some time now, sneaking around so no one in the office knows you’re seeing each other. but when you find yourself in an uncomfortable situation, you’re forced to reveal your relationship to your coworkers

╰┈➤ Celebrity Crush || Ian Hecox x reader • ♡☽

word count: 1.8k warnings: none summary: you have liked ian for some time now and despite your cast mates attempts at telling you that ian feels the same way, you don’t believe them. that is, until some interesting things are revealed through a video

╰┈➤ Historical Figure’s Mario Kart || Ian Hecox x reader • ♡☽

word count: 1k warnings: none summary: imagine being the mom + dad of smosh with ian as all of you hang out

╰┈➤ Try Not to Laugh: Crew Baby Edition || Ian Hecox x reader • ♡☽

word count: 1.2k warnings: pregnancy, talk of milk (iykyk) summary: you announce your’s and ian’s pregnancy through a TNTL bit

anthony padilla…

╰┈➤ First Day || Anthony Padilla x reader • ☽

word count: 2.7k warnings: mild language, cheesiness summary: after ian and anthony buy smosh, you can’t wait to finally meet anthony. but your first encounter with him doesn’t go exactly as you would have thought.

spencer agnew…

╰┈➤ Cool Shoes || Spencer Agnew x reader • ♡☽

word count: 3.7k warnings: mild swearing summary: when you join smosh as the newest addition to the games crew, you are immediately attracted to spencer. but will your little crush turn into something more?

╰┈➤ Cool Shoes: Part 2 || Spencer Agnew x reader • ♡☽

word count: 2.8k warnings: implied smut, innuendos summary: now that you’ve both admitted your feelings for each other, spencer takes you out on your first official date

╰┈➤ Birthday Wishes || Spencer Agnew x reader • ♡☽

word count: 3.2k warnings: mild language summary: you and spencer have been long distance for some time now, and he decides he wants to do something special and surprise you for your birthday

╰┈➤ Spilled Punch || Spencer Agnew x reader • ☽

word count: 3k warnings: none summary: when you agreed to go to a smosh party with your best friend tommy, you didn’t imagine enjoying yourself very much. you also didn’t imagine you’d end up making out with spencer in the coat closest

╰┈➤ I Choose You || Chosen!Spencer Agnew x reader • ☽

word count: 1.1k warnings: none summary: when you come to visit smosh, where your boyfriend spencer works, he surprises you by showing you one of his favorite characters

╰┈➤ Marry Me || Spencer Agnew x reader • ♡☽

word count: 2.4k warnings none: none summary: after seeing shayne and courtney tie the knot, you are worried that you’ll never find a love like theirs. that’s when you start to see your best friend spencer in a new light

╰┈➤ Fight Club || Spencer Agnew x reader • ✧♡☽

word count: 1.8k warnings: cursing, gross man flirts with you summary: when you’re at a club with spencer and you get hit on by a drunk man, you are annoyed that spencer feels like he has to protect you. but then, when things go too far, you get to see just how much spencer cares for you

╰┈➤ See You Online || Spencer Agnew x reader (partial social media au) • ♡☽

word count: 2.6k warnings: mild swearing summary: when you see a smosh video of spencer saying you’re one of his favorite youtubers, you begin to interact online. then, when you both attend vidcon (and spencer’s friends convince him to talk to you) you hit it off

╰┈➤ Dropping Hints || Spencer Agnew x reader (social media au) • ♡☽

word count: 1k warnings: mild language summary: after you guest star in a smosh video, you and spencer start dropping hints of your relationship on insta

trevor evarts…

╰┈➤ Perfect || Trevor Evarts x chubby!reader • ✧♡☽

word count: 1.1k warnings: insecurities, body shaming, implied smut summary: when you are feeling insecure about your body after getting negative comments online from fans, trevor comforts you and assures you that you’re beautiful

╰┈➤ Am I The Crush? || Trevor Evarts x reader • ♡☽

word count: 2.2k warnings: mild swearing summary: when trevor joined smosh, you quickly became friends, helping him settle in—and secretly crushing on him. then some interesting things are revealed in a reddit stories video.

angela giarratana…

╰┈➤ Misread Signs || Angela Giarratana x reader • ☽

word count: 2.2k warnings: none summary: when you start to become really close with courtney, angela takes this as a sign that you aren’t interested in her, until unusual circumstances cause you both to realize each other’s feelings

╰┈➤ Love Hurts || Angela Giarratana x reader • ✧☽

word count: 3.9k warnings: angst summary: you have been in love with angela for months and upon finding out that she is dating someone else, heartbroken you start to distance yourself from her and everything else in your life

╰┈➤ Jealousy, jealousy || Angela Giarratana x reader • ☽

word count: 1.3k warnings: hickeys summary: angela finds herself jealous when another member of the cast flirts with you and she decides to let you know that you’re hers

╰┈➤ Sleepyhead || Angela Giarratana x reader • ♡☽

word count: 0.9k warnings: none summary: a sleepy angela wakes up with you and refuses to let you get out of bed

╰┈➤ Second Chances || Angela Giarratana x reader • ✧☽

word count: 3.3k warnings: none summary: when the smosh cast goes on a company retreat and you and angela are forced to share a hotel room you have the opportunity to rekindle an old romance

╰┈➤ Sweeter than Pie || Angela Giarratana x reader • ♡☽

word count: 1.1k warnings: none summary: when you’re tired from work , angela cooks with you

╰┈➤ Princess || Angela Giarratana x reader • ☽

word count: 2k warnings: sick fic summary: when you start to feel sick during a game night with angela, you let her take care of you for once and she gets to see a different side of you

╰┈➤ Same Time Tomorrow || Angela Giarratana x reader • ♡☽

word count: 2k warnings: none summary: you’ve been going to the same gym for a while now, crushing on the same girl who’s always there but never actually talking to her. that is, until the letters start appearing in your locker

╰┈➤ Red, White, and You || Angela Giarratana x reader • ♡☽

word count: 1.2k warnings: none summary: when you and the rest of the smosh cast go to angela’s place to celebrate the fourth of july, angela makes sure you two get your own celebration

courtney miller…

╰┈➤ Kiss the Nurse || Courtney Miller x sick!reader • ♡☽

word count: 0.6k warnings: sick fic summary: courtney takes care of you when you’re sick and is rewarded with a kiss from their patient

╰┈➤ Stay With Me || sick!Courtney Miller x reader • ♡☽

word count: 0.7k warnings: sick fic, mild swearing summary: when courtney calls and cancels your date night due to a stomach bug, you don’t hesitate to drop everything and take care of them

╰┈➤ Only You || Courtney Miller x reader • ✧☽

word count: 1.2k warnings: none summary: when you begin to get jealous of courtney and shayne’s relationship, courtney assures you that you’re the one they love

shayne topp…

╰┈➤ Worth the Wait || Shayne Topp x reader • ♡☽

word count: 1.1k warnings: mild swearing summary: shayne is determined to find out what your Halloween costume is this year but you won’t tell him, and when the holiday is finally here he finds it very much worth the wait

julio rodríguez…

╰┈➤ Luckiest Man || Julio Rodríguez x reader • ♡☽

word count: 1.2k warnings: none summary: julio has just won the world series and been named mvp and yet his biggest prize is you, his new fiancée

thomas barrow…

╰┈➤ Even || Thomas Barrow & reader • ☽

word count: 3.4k warnings: cursing, homophobia because it’s jimmy summary: when you, a ladies maid who thomas has never got along with in the past, catch thomas making a move on jimmy you’re forced to decide wether or not to help him out

╰┈➤ It’s Nice to Have a Friend || Thomas Barrow & friend!reader • ✧♡☽ (finished)

╰► || Part 1 • Part 2 • Part 3 ||

word count: 4.8k warnings: some mild swearing summary: when you start working at downton abbey as a new maid, thomas takes a liking to you and an unexpected relationship forms between you

ˋ°•*⁀➷ other writing ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹˚

╰┈➤ You Can’t Change the Past || an Elena of Avalor inspired short story

word count: 6k warnings: i was a child when i wrote this summary: jacques, chancellor of emelda, plagued by regrets, is used to helping his cousin run her kingdom. but when he meets some ghosts of his past and a villain returns is he ready to face it all?

ˋ°•*⁀➷ headcanons ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹˚

dating…

╰┈➤ Smosh-

Shayne Topp ♡☽

Damien Haas ♡

Ian Hecox (part 1) ♡☽

Ian Hecox (part 2) ♡☽

Spencer Agnew ♡☽

Anthony Padilla ♡☽

Trevor Evarts ♡☽

Angela Giarratana ♡☽

Amanda Lehan-Canto ♡☽

Smosh Women ♡☽

╰┈➤ Friends-

Joey Tribbiani ♡

Chandler Bing ♡☽

Rachel Green ♡

Monica Geller ♡

Ross Geller ♡☽

Phoebe Buffay ♡

╰┈➤ Jack Edwards-

part 1 ♡

part 2 ♡☽

part 3 ♡☽

part 4 ♡☽

╰┈➤ Seattle Mariners-

Jarred Kelenic ♡

Julio Rodriguez, George Kirby, Jarred Kelenic (Pt 2) ♡☽

╰┈➤ Ray Manchester/Captain Man-

Ray Manchester x reader ♡

Ray Manchester x smart!reader ♡☽

╰┈➤ Miscellaneous-

James McAvoy ♡☽

Carswell Thorne ♡☽

Austin Butler ♡

Elvis Presley ♡☽

Jacques Snicket ♡

Megara ♡

Simon Cowell ♡

Chancellor Esteban Flores ♡

friends + family…

╰┈➤ Thomas Barrow-

Thomas Barrow & friend!reader ♡✧

Thomas Barrow & teen!sister!reader ✧♡☽

╰┈➤ Miscellaneous-

Will Truman ♡

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~°~❦~°~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ˋ°•*⁀➷ fandoms i write for ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹˚

╰► Downton Abbey

╰► Harry Potter

╰► A Series of Unfortunate Events

╰► Smosh

╰► Hercules (1997)

╰► The Lunar Chronicles

╰► Elena of Avalor

╰► Friends

╰► Will and Grace

╰► How I Met Your Mother

╰► The Dropouts Podcast

╰► The Rookie

╰► Elvis Presley + Elvis (2022)

╰► Seattle Mariners

╰► and probably others i’m forgetting so shoot me an ask 💌

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~°~❦~°~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

last updated: 9/16/24

╰┈➤ romanticize, fantasize, sentimentalize…nostalgize ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚🩰

[fistfightinganxietyandlosing]

I don't like A Series of Unfortunate Events because of everything we know about its characters and world. Rather, I like it for everyone we don't know.

[beatricebidelaire]

choose a favorite jacques snicket line(s) of mine (full lines here bc. character limit of the poll)

please, jerome, do not marry this woman.

i hope that this package reaches you safely, and that you are safe when it reaches you, and that i will be safe in making sure this package will reach you in safety, in a safe manner, and in a safe.

the organization has informed me that they will arrange for you to be fired, if possible. if it is not possible you will probably be fired anyway.

under normal circumstances, new volunteers like ourselves would not receive disguise training until our years of apprenticeship were finished, but we have not been under normal circumstances for quite some time. for instance, currently i am under sixty feet of water, rather than under normal circumstances.

someday, perhaps, the world will indeed be quiet once more, but until the fires have been extinguished we must go our separate ways and risk our separate lives.

please pass the brandy.

[aseriesofunfortunatetexts]

asoue + tumblr text posts

[overthestars-and-offtoneverland]

I have no chill so here I go.

Don't look at me like that. You know they're all bitches in some way. Kit's feral, Lemony can't shut his mouth, Jacques throws way too much shade. Absolutely catty, the lot of them.

The Snickets are a bitchy family, and frankly they've earned the right.

[multicolored-malpractice]

When we grab you by the ankles,

Where our mark is to be made,

You'll soon be doing noble work,

Although you won't be paid,

When we drive away in secret,

You'll be a volunteer,

So don't scream when we take you,

The world is quiet here

[fanonical]

snicket parents: okay, here is our daughter katherine, who we will call kit for short snicket parents: we want to fuck over thiis one kid in particular, so we're calling him lemony snicket parents: aaaaaaaaand this one looks french. so he's called jacques