#JUST in case i know they're not. realistic at all lol

[cherubchoirs]

v1's old mechanics giving it a last little tune-up (and maybe refreshing its paint job)

[rayroseu]

You know what's sick as hell about the design of the Briar Senates??? It's that their design mirrors the weapon of the Draconias 😭✨

I know they're getting flak rn bcs they feel like "boomers who's against any progress because they value toxic tradition" but i don't really think they're like... entirely evil lol or the root of every bad thing that happened in Malleus'/Lilia's life (though im side eyeing them as one of the perpetrators still lol)

Tbh, removing them would also cause more harm (just some social issues inside the fae society tbh) than good imo, (I know many ppl say this bcs they think removing the Senates would make it possible for the peace between human and faes, but the thing is, the Senates aren't the only group that thinks this way, almost the entirety of Briar Valley does lol so forcibly removing them now would only come off as "Malleus forcing "human ideals" on the faes just because he has spent 4 years with the humans"(plus is the understanding between humans and faes truly achieved if you try to silence one group(even if that group is kinda disagreeable with anything human related lol), plus realistically the faes would trust their fellow faes first rather than some humans,

so for me, Briar Senates doesn't give off the vibe of toxic old people who drags others down in their toxic practices (while that can be an accurate description i feel like it generalizes too much about their behaviour), rather than that, Briar Senates feels more like thorns, like thorns that surrounds Briar Valley, they're not exactly harmful unless you go against them, but ultimately they're still protection for Briar Valley.

Which makes it fitting that their design has a similarity with the Draconia's weapon, they're the thorns that protects the Draconias, even if it means sheltering them.

And, tbh, if the Senates other job is to ensure Draconias lives, they're kinda doing a "decent job"??? If we can assume through Maleficia's (and Malleus' case), since we didnt hear about her leaving the Senate's side, she managed to survive for so long, unlike Meleanor😭 Also could explain why they're so enraged when Lilia arrived with the news that Meleanor died and why they hated the weak bcs what would weakness could protect JJDSJD Kinda wish their hatred against Lilia wasnt that he was a weak bat fae, but rather they doubled down on the fact he failed protecting Meleanor, imagine if Gen. Lilia wasnt as great in magic as the fae nobles were, yet he still managed to earn a position beside the Princess, all that hard work only to fail at the most crucial time, it wouldve make sense in the Senates' side to say, "Meleanor shouldnt have appointed him" (because "he's weak from the start")

oh additionally, this is just my assumption, bcs I felt like the way the Senates recoiled when Lilia hatched the egg was kinda... random?? so this is my made up reason lol Remember, the Senates were adamant that Maleficia should only be the one to hatch the egg because she's a Draconia, but Lilia did it and he's not a Draconia, What if because Lilia hatched the egg, it also affected the development of Malleus?? Like maybe for instance, it affected Malleus' lifespan, maybe he still lives more than one thousand years but he won't live for another thousand years like a pure Draconia because he's been hatched by Lilia as opposed to who they wanted it to be, which is Maleficia, OF COURSE Lilia hatching the egg is heaps better than Malleus dying before being born, but this is just my auto thoughts regarding the random hate reaction the Senates did when Lilia hatched Malleus lol

Interestingly, the placement of the stone of Draconia against the thorns (of the Senates) can also be hinted at their relationship with them??? In Meleanor's case, her stone is on top of the thorns, which may indicate that she's not under the Senate's commands or that its just telling she just lived distantly from the Senates, most importantly her stone is bigger than the thorns which may tell the fact that the Senates worships her because she's powerful and greater than them, and she's not someone who can be trapped/ordered around within the Senates. But, tragically, in Malleus' case, his stone is under the thorns, like its telling that he's under the Senates protection at all cost and his stone is little compared to Meleanor's because he's still young.

I also have a theory that the Senates are part of Briar Valley's land, like its been canonically said that they're the dead faes of Briarland, which makes think that their death is similar to the death of Conall from Maleficent 2, when Conall was buried, his body literally morphed to the land, which makes me think this is how the Senates used to be buried, when they die, they become one with the land, that's why you can't just remove them, when they are literally the Lands of Briar Valley,,,, get it lol

Though this is making me think that if this is the case then Maleficia's city,,, if the Senate's presence are the strongest there bcs that's where they're nearly buried, does that mean around Black Scale Castle is just lowkey a graveyard.... Is that why Halloween is special for Briar Valley bcs they have close ties/respect for the dead and Halloween is essentially about honoring the dead 😭✨

Off topic, but maybe the thorns part of the Draconia's staff may also tell about their age. Notice how Meleanor's staff has 3 twists which may tell that she's atleast 300~ years old, (if each twists signifies a century), while Malleus' staff only has one twist on its thorns which is accurate considering he's only 178 years old (one century).

If this is true, I'm kinda curious about Maleficia's staff... does that mean hers will be convered in thorns (she needs at least 7 twists (7 centuries~ and more) there on her staff 😭✨)

[beyonsatan]

Here are some REAL astrological tips that I'm not just pulling out my ass and actually learned from reading

1. Aquarius is not ruled by uranus, aquarius is ruled by saturn. When astrologers discovered uranus they borrowed some of the traits of saturn and applied them to uranus because they didnt know what to do with this planet. Having strong uranus influence won't make you feel like an outsider but having a strong saturn influence will. Uranus does not rule "outcasts" or "obstruction" it rules sudden changes which we only associate with aquarius because of their eccentricity and the modern rulership of this sign, aquarius isn't as open to "change" as we would like to think they are, they're a saturn(restrictions) ruled fixed sign, they're more open minded and progressive than capricorn but they're more traditional and less accepting than we think pisces to be.

2. NO planet is unwelcome in the 5th and 11th house. Any personal planets in these houses including mars and saturn, especially the chart ruler is a sign of good fortune, wealth, successful investments and just an easy life in general because these houses are the joy of Venus and Jupiter, harmful planets here become neutralized and instead work to our benefit even with difficult aspects. Ex: Someone with a 5th house saturn might work high paying government jobs or become some kind of authority(saturn) figure sometime within their life.

3. What you've been taught about the north and south node is wrong. The north node is not "underdeveloped traits" The north node represents "increase" while the south node represents decrease, not your comfort zone and this is according to hellenistic and ancient astrology. The north node represents the dragon head while the south node represents its tail. Wherever your north node(the head) is, is where there's an infatuation and/or otherwise increase of energy and experiences, the south node (the tail) is something you abandoned (and shouldnt have) so you could focus on your north node, it's not necessarily something you need to let go of because that's like saying the dragon cut his tail off so he could keep his head lol, the dragon doesn't need to cut his tail at all, his tail is what's helping send him into the right direction because how do you expect him to move without his tail? In this case the south node is something you can rely on to assist you when handling the topics of your north node, that's the whole point. If south node was something that we needed to dismiss or free ourselves from it, there wouldn't be a south node, the south node and north node exist with each other, they HAVE to co-exist

4. I don't really debate about which house system to use when reading your own chart or others but when reading transits, synastry and composite charts, I strongly recommend using WS to make things alot less confusing.

5. The moon is a significator of money in alot of the same ways venus and jupiter are that's why the moon gets exalted in taurus. Moon in Taurus, Pisces, Sagittarius or Libra in the 3rd (house joy), 5th or 11th house is an indicator of wealth.

6. When outer planets transit your cadent houses please don't have a breakdown, planets in cadent houses have the weakest influence within a person's chart.

7. The houses responsible for fame are realistically the 5th, 7th house, 10th and 11th house and everything starts with the 5th house. Explanation: 5th house is the talent you have, the 11th house is your audience, you bring the talents you build upon in the 5th house for the world to see over into the 11th house, the 7th house is your relationship to law and the public, partnerships etc, if you wanna get contracts like a partnership with the NBA or picked to star in a movie, all of this would take place in the 7th house, the 10th house is the brand and image you cultivate after your name gets around from the 7th house, this house talks about your peak, how well did you do? Did you make it big? Planets here, where it's ruler is/and aspects will color all of this. Honorable mention is the 1st house cause the 1st house like the 10th house is angular and says alot about whether eyes are on you, do you get attention, are you an extrovert, are you confident or is building up those kind of things difficult for you, all of this gets answered in the 1st house.

8. Do not let any amateur astrologers gaslight you into thinking that having 8th or 12th house placements make you spiritual, spirituality gets its meaning from the 9th house and the 11th house where jupiter finds joy, planets in the 8th and 12th house is NOT for the weak and I don't mean to sound arrogant, I have 12th house placements and I'm aware that the 12th house doesn't get its meaning from pisces or jupiter, sprutuality is meant to be a good thing, planets in these houses is not a good thing so it is not wise to draw proximity there

9. Both Venus/ Jupiter and it's aspects is an indicator of marriage, the sign they're in, house placement and aspects will tell you more about your spouse (venus if you're attracted to women and jupiter if you're attracted to men)

10. Debilitated or fallen planets are liberated or in accidental dignity when in the angular houses or the 5th and 11th. Yes this counts for retrograde planets as well even tho i don't count retrogrades as a debilitaty. Think of them as having "redemption arcs" like negan from the walking dead, started out evil or In bad condition but it got better real fast or the challenges with that placement are easy to overcome. Ex: aquarius sun in the 1st house, aquarius is obviously debilitated under the sun because the sun and saturn are enemies and aquarius gets overwhelmed by the attention and self expression that comes with the sun but with the sun in the 1st house that luminary becomes apart of you, it's literally influencing your physical body and how you behave, with the sun here you have no trouble expressing yourself and actually like attention, so it's like having a leo rising but alot more intense

[theyluvlyss]

Can I request if you can Hcs of all the ghost boys + Finney being in love ? ( Feel free to not add Finney since you wrote something similar before )

Xoxo 💋

𝐨𝐟𝐜 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧😌...

it's what I'm here for🫡♡. I really like the idea of writing about them being in love/having a crush rather than being with reader right off the bat !! very cool and unique idea (imo), and it definitely harbors that little difference in feelings/slight nuances that I'm very happy to expand on !

although it took me a bit, I've actually gotten most of the boys done already, and that's around when I gained the bright idea to just ... instead of making you wait, I remembered there's this thing called free-will, and I can quite literally post whatever and whenever I want lol😆 ...

meaning I can just post each boy for you one at a time as I finish them instead of waiting until they're all done and then making one long post :D !

on that note, here's finney's hehe...

𝐄𝐚𝐬𝐲 𝐎𝐧 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐄𝐲𝐞𝐬

《 ♡ 》 headcannons

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭 :

while it's always fun to imagine (haha, get it💀) what it'd be like for him to be your best friend or your boyfriend, there's times when you yearn for that tension. that something in between that's more than a platonic relationship, but just short of being a lover. and I'm here to revive that feeling of what it'd be like for finney blake to have a crush on you...

𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 :

fem!reader x finney blake - she/her/hers pronouns!

𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐦𝐞 :

70s-80s - the grabber doesn't exist

𝐓𝐖/𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 :

cursing, as usual - small mentions of anxiety/nerves - finney being super cute lol - overall super duper fluffy and pretty much everything the prompt describes lmao.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ...𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭��� 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

I know you said I didn't have to do him since I already have, but *adds that mf in anyway because he deserves round two of some lovins😆🫧💙🪩*.

Finney liking somebody/finding someone attractive is usually a dead-end deal. He keeps it to himself - buried deep down within the depths of his gentle soul, never to breach the light of day, because he knows good and well that even if it did arise, all it would lead to is rejection and - if he's extra unlucky - a teasing+beat-down combo attack from some known bullies of his (should they find out or be witness to these nonexistent attempts of confession).

A little depressing, I know, but bffr ... if you were Finney, would you do anything different🤨?

Althoughhhh....

Him having a crush on you, specifically, is very,,, confusing. Think of when you have a crush in real life, but you actually have a little bit more of a chance with them than usual. It's realistic. There's a sliver of hope. A light down in the depths of that depressing darkness.

It's like that.

And dare I say, he's fairly obvious about his liking towards you, but only if you're paying close attention.

If you're in a totally different clique, especially a popular one, just kind of in your own little bubble (which might as well be a whole new world to him), then the chances of you noticing/realizing his infatuation with you is very slim. Even in Finney's own case, he'd view you way out of his league, no chance whatsoever, so don't expect him to make any moves of any kind.

And on top of that (as I mentioned first thing), he'd do his damn best to not let ANYONE find out, ESPECIALLY Robin, Gwen, or Bruce, because the last thing he wants is for them to get overconfident on his behalf and try to set y'all up. What if you reject him?

Or worse, what if you end up liking Robin or Bruce instead of him? He wouldn't be able to take it. And lord knows he keeps his crush hidden from his bullies for highly good reasons. An even worse scenario in his mind than the last one is if they publicly teased him (or the both of you) about it, made a mockery of his feelings for you to witness and either join in or pity him - neither an outcome his ego and self-esteem were built to handle.

Now, the opposite - actually knowing him and/or being his friend - the case would probably still remain the same with only slight differences. He'd still find you out of his league, probably wouldn't make any bold moves. But, being his friend, closer to you, a little more comfortable around you, there may be times where he'd make the SLIGHTEST of nods to MAYBE, POSSIBLY liking you in a romantic fashion. JUST A LITTLE BIT.

BUT, he'd also be so worried and absorbed in his own head about all the different little things - am I impressing her? am I making her uncomfy? Does she already know? Does she not know and thinks I'm weird? Did she already think I was weird before I did that thing? Did she even catch onto that thing I did? Is she ignoring it? Is she ignoring me? Oh my god, she fucking hates me - that he lowkey wouldn't even consider the fact that you've been making more obvious moves on him this whole time.

He would probably end up liking you because of something you said or did. Like, depending on the situation, you said/did something that really resonated with him, or he found himself thinking about a lot. Which would then lead to him thinking about you a lot, and it's a spiral from there. Or, if already friends, it's probably something you did/said that had him now seeing you a new/different light, which, again, spirals from there.

Should anyone that's not you uncover the feelings he harbors, he's so the type to deny it. Gwen could be studying your behavior and body language up and down, and then report back to Finney with WRITTEN, PICTURE, PHYSICAL FUCKING EVIDENCE of you liking him/reciprocating the crush, and Finney would just be like, "...Nahhhh, you're just delusional, she wouldn't even notice if I disappeared the next day." And Gwen would just be like, "This bitch here😐..."

Either way tho, what I meant way earlier by "confusing" is that his version of (just barely) letting you know he likes you romantically is him just being,,, himself/friendly but a little bit more than usual LMFAO. Like, if y'all are friends and he always walked you to and from school, what he would do to further insinuate that he 💙likes💙 you is to just,,, walk you everywhere else🥴💀. Essentially be your moral support wherever you go lmfao.

Or like, besides doing stuff he really doesn't need to do that confuses you, he'd do things that kinda give the OPPOSITE of, "I'm literally in love with you." Avoid/not talk to you, avoid eye contact, stuff that just leaves you like, "...I don't think he wants to be my friend anymore🥲💔." LIKE BOY-!😭

But it's not intentional. It's just his nerves and doubts getting the better of him, y'know? Overthinkin, which leads to overreacting, etcetc., you know how it goes/what that's like lol.

So yeah, basic point, if the feelings aren't already made VERY CLEAR from the jump, don't expect things to get any clearer😻.

BUT, if after a while should he either gain a little more confidence (prolly from Robin) or you grow a pair and make the first bold move yourself (which would confirm it for him to be more comfy getting bolder himself as well), I feel like he'd still remain a little shy and mildly confusing, but very berry cute nonetheless.

I'm telling you, he'd put those crafting skills to work, hon👏🏽!! Just any chance he gets/has to either make you something or just impress you with something he's made, he's putting 1000% percent into it. I'm talking he's going broke, losing sleep, practicing what he's gonna say and how he says it - it's all going into whatever little (or big??) craft he knows you're going to see/he's gifting to you.

He'd also compliment you a lot, along with being more himself, which HELLO, he's so silly when he wants to be. I feel like he'd have you laughing a lot without exactly meaning/trying to, but HE'D FS CHERISH THAT like,,, every time he'd make you laugh, he'd just feel like he was on cloud nine - 'I made her laugh, I did that, me, she thinks I'm funny, she likes me, she's literally in love with me like I am her, otherwise she wouldn't be laughing so hard-'

...😃...Yeah, he takes what he can get and RUNS with it (which is why I think he'd love and is in need of lots of reassuring, plz take care of my baby😭🙏🏽).

On the topic of such, actually, it's kinda funny because it doesn't really affect his envy levels.

I don't think he'd get all that jealous if he saw you with other ppl; it would just be the thing of like,,, "That's what I get for getting my hopes up."/"It could be worse ngl." lmao which is sad on one hand but kind of mature on the other, yk?

Mature that'd he'd just leave it alone, not be pushy. But sad because wdym you think you're not worthy of some love/what you want out of life :( ? Luckily for him, though, I don't think he's able to hide disappointment/sadness very well.

Not that he's going around telling people, but he's just one of those "face/tone of voice says it all" kind of guys. So, depending on your thought process and if you can put two and two together, you're quick to squash any doubts of you being interested in someone else romantically.

"I'm not really into *state another persons features lol idk*. Not my type of guy..." which may or may not be you trying to guide him into asking your type, and he may or may not take the bait🤭.

No, but seriously, he literally may or may not catch on. There's definitely been a few times where he's missed the social cue, and on the inside, you're just like "😔🙄..."

He gets SUPPPPER flattered if/when you get jealous, tho. Like, I'd imagine it's a pretty rare occurrence (surprisingly to you, don't nobody be hitting on Finney Blake, okay💀✋🏽), but when it does happen, you're very quick to make it known you're hardcore crushing and liked him first, even going as far as to make it appear as if he's already taken.

You're hanging off of his arm more than usual or playing with his hand to keep him from fidgeting, you're staring at him with such a strong look of love-sickness in your eyes that might even cause the other girl to throw up, and should she even get as far as asking him out...? Oh boy...

"Actually, Finn, we were gonna hang out today, weren't we? I wanted to help you paint that rocket you're working on, I have the perfect colors in mind already...!"

"You...You do?"

"Yes, I do😃😐."

And the other girl just has to be like, "...I'll um,,,, Nevermind, Finney, I'll see you around."

"Maybe...!" You'll call after her cheekily, smile growing wider and wider as she trails away with Finney yet to even process the entire interaction at all. And while he might not catch on right away, the second he does, he's BEET red💀😭.

He doesn't know whether to admit he's smitten by your hostility or to let you know you don't have to be😭✋🏽. And more often than not, he'll opt for saying nothing at all, smiling to himself all shy while you're back to normal, talking as if you hadn't thwarted off a foe.

Confessing... That's not fucking happening, ever at all💀. And if he did, it would be on his death bed (I'm joking). But srsly, if he can avoid it for as long as possible, he will. The type to tell you on the last day of school, I'm talking GRADUATION DAY, right as one of y'all are leaving FOREVER, on some "I've always liked you..." type shit, and you would just have to be like, "WHYDIDYOUWAITSOLONGWHATTHEFUCK😭💔💔‼️‼️" Which is why I think it'd truly be up to you to confess (hopefully) way sooner😭💀✋🏽.

And if/when you did, he'd probably forget how to,,, exist lmao. Like, one of those moments where the information has to process in his head so he's just standing there looking at you like, "🧍🏻‍♂️:0" for a second before he's like, "o-OH!...I...I like you, too! And I have for- I mean... Like, it's been long. A long time. I've liked you a long time :D."

YOU KNOW WHAT?? If he felt he, himself, absolutely had to confess, he'd write you something. He's not Shakespeare or anything, but it would be much easier and less nerve-wracking for him to just write it all down. He'd hand it to you in person, apologize for the length of the letter that YOU HAVEN'T EVEN OPENED YET😭, and then practically teleport from the scene because he doesn't even wanna stay for your reaction. The fear of rejection is genuinely too much for him.

He'd be better off never hearing from you again if you didn't like him back rather than have you tell him to his face. ALSO, he'd give it to you in private. Wouldn't want to put you or himself on the spot, nor would he want to risk somebody catching him or you with the paper that has him pouring his heart out to you on it.

But, of course (because why else would you be reading this if you weren't expecting The Good Ending™), you're confused while opening and reading it until those feelings gradually begin to swell into a mixture of flatter, adoration, and just flat out love because not only had he FINALLY confessed to you...

But you had found it to be written quite beautifully, and it was overall the cutest thing that had ever happened to you, so now you have to return the favor - scribbling your response in some colorful pen color on the back of his own confession note, doodled with hearts and squiggly lines and all of that nonsense, leaving it in his locker - and letting the events take off from there.

Letting the relationship blossom from there🫧🥹🪩💙✨️.

𝐈 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲𝐞𝐝 !!

ik I say this literally every time I post something, but I really loved writing this, and it's because I LOVE WRITING; I love doing this shit, idcidc✋🏽😭✋🏽. if I could make a living off of this, I would, and I love seeing your guys' requests every day and reading through them over and over again.

and guys, let me tell ya', there isn't a better feeling in the world than completing and posting one, because whew...!! it's like having an endless supply of inspiration fr, I love it.

anyways, robin's will be posted soon after this one, so be on the lookout🫡😼 !!

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ...𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ...𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭

𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 :

@in3rci4

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 :

2,103 words

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐬 :

none :(

[cripplecharacters]

oh yeah another question abt intellectual disability: what do people with moderate id speak like? i assume they wouldnt be perfectly articulate but i know making them talk like cavemen would be bad too. i do want it to be clear that they have language difficulties, but im not sure how to do that realistically. so what kinds of grammar errors are actually common? would it make sense to have them mix up words with similar pronunciation, or have difficulty discerning the differences in implications between words with similar meanings (like "pretty" vs "attractive")? do people with id ever 'imagine context' the way people(well, me) do when half-asleep where the brain mishears a statement as something completely unrelated? would spatial and situational awareness be impaired? also this is kind of a different question but if you can give advice on what to do with game mechanics for an id character in an rpg, that would be nice! i already have the stats figured out for every character and theres no stat that i think would be strongly affected by id but in terms of depicted fighting style and other mechanics maybe thered be some stuff informed by it (i cant do anything too complex though, im using rpg maker vx ace). idk! im spitballing here. main thing i need to know is how to write dialogue for a character with id ^_^

Hi! We have a post somewhat about this that you might find useful, I'll try to go over the other questions below!

Keep in mind my ID is mild (and on the milder side of that) so my answer will be all second-hand knowledge from talking to people with moderate ID in my SPED years.

A lot of it will depend on what condition causes they have. People with Williams syndrome have very “normal” verbal skills majority of the time and you can't really tell in my experience. On the other hand if they're autistic you can potentially guess from the tone of the voice e.g. they speak in a very loud and monotone way. People with Down syndrome are very likely to have a speech disorder, someone with cerebral palsy might slur their words, etc.

A lot of people with ID might be less talkative than your average person (there's definitely exceptions). So your character could use shorter sentences, simple sentences (in the grammar sense), prefer to use other forms of communication for things that don't require speech (e.g., nodding instead of saying “Yes, I agree”, or doing a thumbs up, etc.), or have to be prompted to actually answer/take part in the conversation.

I personally don't recall ever hearing the “mixing words with similar pronunciation” in someone's actual speech, maybe unless they learned the language from reading rather than hearing it? If that's the case, then ID could affect their speech more than if they didn't have it, otherwise I'd assume that the character might have brain damage or is maybe hard of hearing and simply mixes them up because they can't recognize/hear the difference between them.

Mixing words based on specific meaning makes much more sense in my opinion (probably because I do that myself lol). Synonyms or words that might make sense in one context but not the other are the worst. Your example here is great! When someone has ID they might take away the wrong meaning out of a word and use it incorrectly because of that. E.g., their parents used to take them camping to a forest with lots of bugs, they don't like bugs, they can later call something “foresty” to mean “with lots of bugs” even if it doesn't have much to do with an actual forest. This might make more sense for a character with more severe ID (or if they're just young) but using “attractive” when you'd normally say “pretty” makes sense for someone with moderate ID in my opinion.

Something that can also affect speech of someone with ID is word repetition. Not really in the echolalia sense (though it can be that too) but just using stock phrases that get repetitive over time. I try to edit it out from my posts but you can still kinda see it. For some people it will be ending most sentences with the same word, for someone else it will be starting two paragraphs with the same three words without realizing even though they're right next to each other or overusing “maybe” and “if” to start sentences.

As for the “imagining context” while mishearing something, I'm not sure if I know what you mean by it so I'm going to go out on a limb and say that I don't do it lol

Situational awareness is definitely impacted for all people with ID but to different degrees. I don't know if it's part of the diagnostic criteria but it might as well be. When the person's ID is mild it might look like someone who's just kinda unaware of what goes around them, maybe don't recognize that they're doing something that could end up badly. The more severe the intellectual disability the more obvious it is, the person might elope (wander off) and not be able to find their way back, not be able to use cooking utensils safely because they don't recognize the risks in real time (not really in the “not realizing that the knife is sharp” way if they have moderate ID, more like “not realizing that you need to be careful when putting things on hot oil or you can get burned”), assuming that people are automatically safe to be around, things like that.

Spatial awareness doesn't affect everyone, but one of the biggest comorbidities of ID is dyspraxia, which does affect it a lot. There are people with mild ID with severe dyspraxia, and severely ID people with no dyspraxia. It varies.

Unfortunately I have never played any RPGS and I'm not really familiar with the mechanics. Here's an old ask about intellectually disabled characters engaged in combat, hopefully it's useful?

If you want some real-life resources for hearing how intellectually disabled people talk, I really recommend this playlist. It's a bunch of interviews with people with Down syndrome and you can see that they're all very different from each other despite having the same disability.

I hope this helps! mod Sasza

[misc-obeyme]

what are your thoughts on the cheeky lil cow boy (belphie)

Ah yes, Belphegor, a bit of a polarizing character in general, I think. People seem to either really love him or really hate him.

Generally speaking, I think he's deceptively cunning, but not in a malicious way. He's pretty chill most of the time, but he'll do stuff like manipulate his brothers to get them to do his chores for him. Except for Beel, of course. And really they are a unit. Belphie is always ready to fight for Beel and vice versa. But I also really like how they just quietly support each other. Someone will say oh Belphie fell asleep in this weird place and Beel will immediately be like I'll go get him. Or Belphie will be like we need to make sure we bring food to this thing because Beel will get hungry. Like they're just always thinking about each other and I think that's really sweet.

Belphie will also call people out if he wants to. If he has no reason to keep it to himself, he'll straight up tell you if he thinks you're doing something questionable. And his issues with Diavolo indicate to me that he has a problem with authority, like he would be more defiant if he wasn't also lazy lol.

Inevitably, though, we can't really talk about Belphie without discussing the Lesson 16 Incident. At this point, I think most people are aware of those events, but just in case, I'll put the rest of this under a read more. And also it's kinda lengthy, so be forewarned lol.

First of all, I have to say that I was honestly so confused about what was happening in Lesson 16 that I didn't fully understand that Belphie had killed MC. I had to read it multiple times and then read what other people were saying about it. So I never had an intense reaction to it.

But to be fair, it wasn't like we didn't know there was something weird going on the whole time. I knew it was the youngest brother locked up there and it seemed like it was wrong, so that made Lucifer out to be the bad guy of the situation. Then it turns out that wasn't the case at all.

Belphie is manipulative. That's just part of his character. And when he has something that he's trying to do, he's going to use that skill to get it.

Some people are still mad at Lucifer for locking Belphie up at all. Some people are obviously quite upset that Belphie killed MC.

But here's what I think.

It isn't that black and white. Aside from the confusing time travel shenanigans, this event is one of the most realistic things that has ever happened in the story.

Belphie shared Lilith's love of humans. Together they wanted to learn more about the human world. It would be easy for him to blame himself for her interest and what ultimately led to her death. But even if he didn't, he saw the way that it tore his entire family apart.

It wasn't just that his dad got mad at his sister and they had an argument or something.

It was that his dad was going to end his sister's existence and in defiance, his older brother rebelled. And there was a war. This was not some squabble. This was siblings fighting siblings.

Belphie watched his brothers and sisters fight and hurt and kill each other and it all came back to Lilith falling in love with a human.

And then he fell with his brothers, cast out of his home, losing everything he's ever known. His brothers are changing and suffering just like he is.

They don't talk about it. They clearly all keep secrets regarding it still, things that don't come out until MC comes along. Which is supposedly thousands of years after the fact (at least in OG). That means Belphie has had all that time to let that trauma fester. To let it twist inside him. To let it morph into the one thought that became most dominant: that humans are bad.

Is that a fair assessment of what happened? No, of course not. But we're dealing with a war traumatized fallen angel that clearly hasn't worked through any of these feelings in thousands of years.

And then he defies Diavolo and Lucifer panics.

Yes, Lucifer should have found a better way of handling it. But remember what happened to him when he defied authority? He is trying his best to protect Belphie. He is trying not to lose another sibling. He is also still traumatized and therefore overreacting out of fear.

And so was Belphie.

Imagine being locked up like that and a human comes along. A human is free among your brothers to do whatever terrible things humans do while you're powerless to stop them. Of course he's going to try to manipulate that human into setting him free. Of course he's then going to eliminate them because humans have been historically bad for his family.

I read this situation as Belphie being both afraid and angry that a human - the thing he's convinced himself was the main cause of his sister's death - has become so close to his brothers and has the access to his family that could cause another rift among them.

You could say that it was Belphie's idea to get MC to have all the pacts, but that isn't really true, either. By the time MC meets Belphie, they already have a pact with two of his brothers. He sees them already starting to worm their way into his family. And he knows that the only way to get out of the attic is to encourage it. He doesn't really have a choice.

Maybe everyone can now call me a Belphie apologist. But I'm always coming at this from an outside fictional standpoint. I'm like listen he's a flawed character and it's actually pretty realistic of him to react this way considering the circumstances.

However, he did kill MC. And that's why my own MC, Ciaran, has issues with Belphie for a while. It's also traumatic to have someone kill you, so it isn't like I'm saying MC should just forget about it or forgive Belphie immediately. I think it probably should have taken a lot more time for MC to trust Belphie again. Certainly that part of the story was a bit rushed.

But they're dealing with lesson format constraints and also it's a silly otome game so I guess fully formed character arcs can't be expected. Especially since we aren't dealing with routes and they have to cram everybody into the same set of lessons.

In the end, I think Belphie is an interesting and complex character. I think there's a lot of space to explore more about this particular aspect of him, but due to the format of the media and the lack of routes, his more in depth character arc just doesn't exist.

I personally have no problem with Belphie as a character, but I also understand why people don't like him. I am always of the opinion that everyone is free to love or hate or have any emotions at all about fictional characters lol. This is just my personal opinion.

[fieldsofmistria-confessions]

I made a whole post about this on my blog, but I'm going to be a little but more 'honest' here.

I wish people were mean- er to March in fiction. It bothers me that even in fanfic it feels like the farmer is always nice to him. People tend to focus on the grumpy vs sunshine trope, which imo is kinda boring; most of the time it feels like the "sunshine" character is fixing the grump.

In universe, your just Some GuyTM. It feels like the town puts you on a pedestal at times. Even though its just a game, it makes me feel like "wow I can't let these people down" & that includes being nice & friendly to everyone. I like that March doesn't give us that treatment (even if its entirely due to his ego). I feel like you can be more of a person with him. He feels... safe, in that way. I wish more fics would lean into that dynamic.

Fuck maybe I'll just write my own fic lol.

Wow, I am so sorry, I just finished writing this and I realized you might not even want to hear my opinion. Anyway I'm just yapping here, feel free to ignore me.

I understand where you're coming from. In my opinion, it's a case of "You're the protagonist, you're the hero, let's let you have that spotlight and be treated nicely by most characters", even if it might not be realistic. It's all about bringing comfort to the player.

March, of course, being the exception. And you can be kinda mean to him in-game! When they give you dialogue options there's always a nice one and a more harsh one, so I don't think that how you treat him is entirely out of your control.

As for why people are nice to him, I'd say it's a combination of a few factors. One, people really like tsunderes. And they want March to like them, so they treat him nice. Two, they might see themselves in him, and they treat him nice because that's how they wish they were treated. Three, they're just nice and they want to be nice to everyone!

I definitely think your idea is great, about relying more on him for his honesty since you don't know the extent of the others' 'fake' niceness (although this is a pretty safe game and I don't believe any of them are outright malicious, Juniper might be the boldest).

You should write that fic! I'm sure you're not alone in that sentiment, and it would be refreshing to see for sure :)

[doubledyke]

Which are some of your unpopular opinions?

hmm well i don't think most of my takes are that hot tbh. our community here is pretty small so there's usually some overlap with head canons/fanon, etc. most of us are on the same page, or at least in the same chapter lmao. which is great! and even when i see a take i might not wholeheartedly agree with, i feel like it's still added to my subconscious lore to be explored later.

right off the bat, i guess one hot take might be that i find the theme song pretty grating 👀 i skip it every time. it's probably because ive heard it so many times since i was a kid up to now. i don't even really have a nostalgic or sentimental attachment to it at this point.

all my mutuals know this already, but season 1 is my favorite season, which i don't think is the case for most fans. i made a whole long post about that already though.

im already drawing a blank here ummmm

well, i probably have a lower opinion of edd's parents than most people in our little community. realistically it makes more sense that they're simply absent (neglectful) due to their demanding jobs, and that they work hard to give edd a good life, etc. but i tend to view it as more of a malicious, conscious choice. i like angst and drama, what can i say ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

this one isn't really a hot take these days, especially among the tumblr crowd, but i like when edd is portrayed as the morally complex character that he is. i don't think he's all good or all bad. he's way more realistically ambiguous than that. i'd say i do lean towards him being a bit more devious than most though.

moving more into head canon territory here, but

i don't talk about this one a lot because it's totally projection, but i think edd would have issues with alcohol. between his autism, his ocd and his unloving parents, i think he'd hit the bottle a little too hard after realizing how much he likes the way it makes him feel. but he'll work through it eventually don't worry.

uhhhh let's see

again, not a scorching hot take here, but i enjoy edmay, and it's not because i don't want ed to be a "third wheel" (he's lowkey a third wheel in the show, but anyway-), it's because they're cute. that simple. i'm totally cool with ed being asexual, and i think it fits his character a bit more tbh. but i really like may, and i think her experience as the sort of outcast among her sisters is a good match for ed's experience as somewhat of an outcast even among his already outcast friend group. i think they make a very cute, very weird, and probably very smelly couple.

i have sympathy for bro! i think many of us do, but yeah. obviously he's really shitty towards eddy and even the other kids, but you don't just wake up one day and decide to be a "monster". he's clearly got trauma and issues of his own and while that's not an excuse, it's worth acknowledging. i'm fascinated by eddy and bro's dynamic and it's one of my favorite things to analyze and speculate about.

to me, it's likely that eddy would try to date girls in middle/high school, perhaps even beyond. i don't see him and edd even really addressing their deeper feelings until after graduation because of eddy's internalized homophobia and deep-seated denial of his sexuality. he'd still be worried about what people think in that regard. idk, i know a lot of folks see them being together shortly after bps, or even in high school but personally i don't see it. like edd knows how he feels, but he's not gonna push it. he'll let eddy figure it out on his own. plus it's amusing to imagine how awkward it would be for eddy and the poor girls that fall victim to his farce.

you'd think i'd have more hot takes about eddy but i think i post most of my thoughts about him pretty openly lol.

oh, i kinda hesitate to bring this one up cuz it's hard to explain or back up with much evidence, but PERSONALLY, i think eddy is pretty smart. i love to harp on his malapropisms as much as the next guy, and obviously he's immature and all the other negative adjectives associated with teenage boys. but he's very clever and witty, and like most kids with terrible trauma, "wise beyond his years". he's inventive and resourceful. he's good at analyzing people (in some circumstances) and learning what makes them tick. and despite being unable to come up with an example at the moment, sometimes the words and phrases he uses, and just generally the way he talks is more....advanced? than you'd expect from someone who can't spell "respect". i dunno, i'm sure at some point i'll make a long-winded post about this subject but suffice to say, eddy is smarter than he gets credit for.

but yeah nothing super controversial i wouldn't say. i have some weirder headcanons that im sure ill blab about at some point, but for the most part like i said, im pretty outspoken with my eene opinions. thanks for asking!!

[its-the-sa]

it is serious. the ship just comes off as nasty to me and i dont understand it

oh, then I'm sorry for being dismissive. I thought you were just a hater lol.

but in all seriousness, if a ship seems nasty to you, then a logical explanation of it is probably not going to change your mind. squicks are just gut reactions, so it doesn't really matter whether or not you understand the thing that squicks you. and that's ok! if the ship makes you uncomfortable, you should just block the rw regicide tag (or in my case you should probably just block me entirely lol )

but since you did ask sincerely, I'll at least try to explain why I ship it:

basically, I'm just a sucker for the 'enemies to lovers' trope and the 'villain redemption' trope. show me any two characters who fit both of those, and I'll probably ship it lol

I like villain redemption, because I like tragic villains. I like villains whose actions are inexcusable, but understandable. villains who lash out due to grief and end up doing horrible things in the throes of rage. and I like making them feel bad about it. I like villains who know they are monsters, who know they have done despicably evil things and truly hate themselves for it. and I like giving them a second chance. I like to see them feel remorse and turn away from evil and try to become better people.

and I like enemies to lovers because... well, for a lot of reasons that would probably take several thesis papers to unpack, lmao. but basically there's just something really intimate about two characters who can handle each other at their absolute worst, when no one else can. arti is like an unstoppable force of rage until she meets scav king, who is like an immovable object to her. he's willing to fight her and kill her as many times as he needs to, but he never strikes first, and he always gives her the chance to back down. and since he does have min aggression and max sympathy, I see him as the type of person who would easily forgive someone who is genuinely remorseful. he doesn't want to keep the cycle of violence and hatred going; whenever arti is ready to let go of her rage and stop the bloodshed, so is he. when she's ready to face the consequences of her actions and try to become a better person, he would rather support her than condemn her. he doesn't necessarily expect his people to forgive her, and he doesn't try to make excuses for her or downplay any of the harm she caused. i just think he could personally look at arti and find someone worth caring about underneath all the rage and hate, and in turn she could look at him and find someone she can trust enough to let all that hate go and admit she was wrong.

obviously, this type of relationship could never happen in real life (or if it did, it would be a fucking toxic disaster). but they're just characters, so their relationship doesnt have to be realistic, and I just want their story to have a happy ending I guess.

idk if any of this makes sense to you, but it's fine if not. you don't always have to understand why people like things that you don't like, it's ok to just block them for your own peace of mind. so if this ship still makes you uncomfortable, feel free to block me, I wouldn't take offense. stay safe and remember that fandom is for having fun , so dont stress out about it too much!

[cripplingoptimism]

Distractions [3/3]

Gonna wrap this up in 3 parts. Previous here.

Yo, WHAT was happening on Twitter this week?? Every time I opened the app there was a new analysis of the Goddamn couch scene. I didn't think Trigun could hurt me any more and yet here I am in a new spiral over an internet stranger's hot take.

Anywaaaaay, I've had this brainworm way before whatever angst got a hold of Twitter. I've always interpreted Vash and Wolfwood’s relationship as 'right people, wrong time'. But honestly, I love every interpretation of them - platonic, soulmates, lovers, etc. So, through these comics I wanted to show moments during their journey that conveyed the gradual evolution of their relationship (as I head cannon it lmao). Canonically, Vash never gets to tell Wolfwood how he feels and my poor little heart has been in denial about that ever since. So this is my *slight* rewriting of the series of events leading up to Wolfwood's solo journey.

At this point in the manga (ch. 50) I wanted to show that, despite the 7 month time skip, it's like no time has passed between them. They're still comfortable and casual with each other, still seeking the comfort of distractions - Neither of them wanting to shatter the illusion of normalcy in this moment. And I feel Vash would be the first to ask for more when reality comes knocking (through Wolfwood's fist lol).

He knows, even in a best-case scenario, his time with Wolfwood is limited. And while Vash is just as shackled by duty and guilt as Wolfwood, he carries an optimism about him that Wolfwood lacks. He needs Woolfwood to know how he feels so he can live without regret, regardless of the outcome. As such, he takes the leap. Wolfwood, unfortunately, cannot bring himself to share in that optimism. He’s too absorbed in worry about the orphanage, the children and especially Livio. His heart is screaming at him, but he knows he can’t afford to be distracted by his “selfish” desires. So, he rejects Vash by being realistic and hopes he can see that he wants this too, but just can't bear the impending heartbreak due to their circumstances. Vash does see this. He swallows his disappointment and heartbreak, earnestly grateful for the relationship he still has with Wolfwood.

I know my characterization feels like it conflicts with the moment on the couch; Vash can't even look at Wolfwood for that entire scene despite Wolfwood being the one to try and connect with him ("You look better...when you smile."). However, I never saw that moment as Vash rejecting Wolfwood. Not in the traditional sense at least (maybe an inadvertent rejection). Vash wanted more between them (to share his tomorrows), but not like this - not as a deathbed confession. He's heartbroken and grieving and (somewhat selfishly) can't see that Wolfwood just wants to enjoy his last moments with the one person on this planet he can call an equal and a friend.

Speaking of the dreaded couch scene, I don't think I can add anything new to the discourse, but I will say the tragedy for me really lies in all the emotions Wolfwood goes through:

Being at peace with his death ("This is the way you want it?" "Yeah."). It's what he believed he deserved, with all the blood on his hands, and the mutation of his body, he assumed he could never return to his previous life with everyone at the orphanage.

Grieving for his future (confetti). Wolfwood never believed he could be forgiven. The children celebrating his return showed their acceptance of him, welcoming him back regardless of his sins. He was worthy of forgiveness. His guilt prevented him from even entertaining the thought of forgiving himself. There must have been regret in those tears.

Seeking comfort from the one person he grew to truly trust and Vash not being strong enough to give it. I already mentioned this above, but Vash not even being able to look at Wolfwood throughout the entire couch scene tears me up.

From the narrative's perspective, Wolfwood needed to die. And even knowing that, it still absolutely destroyed me (and still does). Not just because he died, but because right before his death, he was given a glimmer of hope - that had he survived the fight with Livio, he would have had a chance at happiness.

Last side note here: I've seen discourse online explaining the entire scene is a metaphor for a wedding and I just wanna say, you'll be hearing from my therapist.

[theanxiousghostartist]

TMAGP 25 SPOILERS

(Reactions and Theories)

Pre-Case (Sam/Alice chat):

I'm glad Sam and Alice are finally communicating! Sam explained to Alice how he feels like she is overbearing, especially when worrying about Sam. So many problems could be solved with communication, and I'm glad they're getting along again.

Also, Celia is asking Sam to reassure Alice was so cute.

Case:

This case disgusted me, I was nauseous the entire time. I don't think a case or statement has affected me that much, ever. I hated it, but that's the goal of horror, so I'm not upset about it, lol.

It definitely reads Corruption, but maybe with Web in it as well? I don't have many notes about this case because, well, I hate thinking about the case lol.

Overall, I think the Hungry Man Grill works similar to the Distortion's Hallways or Hilltop Road in TMA as a certified location for the fears to feed.

It could also be a breeding place for Avatars. The hunger that Harte felt was definitely unnatural for their situation. Perhaps it wasn't a human hunger at all - perhaps it was the hunger for fear. Maybe the people that escape this place are meant to Become, while the rest are used as feeding.

(I might add on to this later, once I've processed everything, but IDK)

Post- Case -

Colin:

Woo! He's back and alive!

He reminds me of S2 Jonathan "Supplemental - I broke into Gertrude's Flat" Sims here. He just wants to save everyone, like he said, and he believes FR3D1 is the one causing everything (the fears, the externals, [Error], ect), and therefore, it must be destroyed. It's odd to me, though, that he didn't go directly to the servers, FR3D1's main system, and instead targeted the computers. If he really wanted to destroy FR3D1, why go to the extension instead of the head?

There are two reasons he could have done this:

1. (The most likely imo) - He wanted to protect the others. By destroying all the computers first (and probably their phones/other technology), he could safely explain what was going on and then destroy the server. If Alice believed him, it would satisfy that small part in him that's questioning if he's just crazy. I pinpoint Alice here because we know she's much closer to Colin than Sam. Therefore, if she believed her, it would be more reassurance for him than if Sam believed him. Furthermore, if he destroyed their computers, he could, in theory, destroy any influence Fr3D1 has over them.

2. He was compelled to, in order to minimize damage. Colin was compelled by someone ( who could've been Fr3D1 (I'm pretty sure it's an entity of some kind itself), Lena (while she did seem surprised about Colin, she didn't seem too worried about the servers, only the initial computers), Jon/Martin/Jonah (who I'm theorizing are trapped in the computer, and thus, could manipulate the systems (as we've seen with cases popping up for specific people) and possibly outside figures close to the system via the compute), [Error], or some other force we have not met yet). If the damage Colin did was minimized, it would dave Fr3D1 and the overall function of the OIAR.

Group Chat:

Lena speaking to the group with a tired mother tone was very funny to me; I love the interactions in this series so much!

I'm glad people are worried for Colin - thank you, Alice and Sam (although, arguably, Sam is more worried about the information Colin provided than Colin himself, which is very Web vibes).

"I thought he might hurt Alice" - awww

Gwen seems to be agreeing with Lena, a lot, which is kinda put of character for her - I wonder what her plan is...

"While I understand your concerns [Sam], there is no way we can realistically act upon them." Lena's higher-ups have something to do with this, don't they? I wonder if Lena is trying to protect Sam by shutting down his worries. Maybe she was doing the same with Colin?

The server is essential for the OIAR? I wonder if she means more than just cases? Perhaps it serves as a way to find future Externals (like INK5OUL and [Error]). Maybe it also serves as a way to keep tabs on Lena?

Celia:

Celia is in Oxford again, and her teleporting/sleepwalking seems to be getting more and more frequent. I've been wondering for a while - why now? Why would she go looking for everyone (besides Georgie) now, when she had time to do it before?

Maybe it's because her "late-night travels" to Oxford are getting more and more frequent (as supproted by her thoughts at the end of the episode and Lena being concerned about her absences affecting her work). Perhaps she thought she had more time, but now- now, "her self" is rejecting being in this new universe and is taking her to the portal to go back. She can't stay here long because eventually, she will be pushed back to somewhere (maybe not even her home universe).

I called "her self" because I'm not quite sure if I should describe it as a soul or her unconscious or something else, but with the themes of self in many cases, it seems fitting to call it "her self."

(Sorry for the tangent!/gen)

I loved the character interactions in this episode! Very fun stuff. Although the case disgusted me completely, it was really good.

[skyfallscotland]

Hi! I hope you’re feeling better. 💜

When I’ve heard writers talk about their process, some outline a character before they start writing and outline everything- the charcater’s history, personality, etc. While other writers say the character “talks” to them as they write and they don’t plot a lot out before hand. I’m curious- how much of Remi’s personality did you determine before you started writing? For example, did you know she was wonderfully snarky before you started writing? Did you always know she struggled with depression?

I know you’ve written other OC’s too. Has your process changed since writing Tessa and co?

Hi!

I...am incapable of lying lol. I'm not really, but I appreciate the sentiment 💗 Not looking for sympathy, just keeping it real 💀 The depression be doing some depressing. But hey, *sobs as I smash at my keyboard* it makes for great content!

I don’t hear it. I can’t hear anything but the pounding of my own heart and one memory on repeat. You can love someone and hate them a little at the same time. My mind is stuck on that. I know he loves me, but—he hates me, he hates me, he hates me—I fucked things up.

I never outline an entire character before I start writing. I have an idea in my head, but not a whole profile. I don't even name them until I'm part way through a story, they're "Name" usually until like chapter five-ish and then I hate their names until like chapter ten.

The case of Remi is a little different, honestly I've kind of done things backwards. When I created Tessa I had an idea of what her personality would be, based on what she'd been through living in Illyria and there were small parts of myself I incorporated into her, like her struggle with social settings and relationships. With Stella I was more just having fun, but keeping in mind the (broad overview) history I had planned for her. They do kind of just write themselves, if I'm honest. It's why I like to write ahead, because I only ever have a broad plan in mind.

I don't know that I ever really planned to publish BRV outside of like a little wattpad adventure. It was entirely self-indulgent. I tried very hard with Tessa and Stella to have them be...measured? I guess you'd say. To not pour too much of myself into them.

Remi was cathartic. There's so much of me in her. She was my 'whatever, it's not serious' character and story. I just threw whatever I wanted at the page without worrying about whether things were realistic or too self-indulgent and I guess that worked for a lot of people.

I knew she'd be snarky and a realist and that she wouldn't be as settled as Violet with her chronic illness. I knew she'd be depressed and quick to anger because that's me and my experience and it was a therapeutic process pouring all that out onto the page. So I guess I didn't really need to determine anything, I just wrote from the heart. She's almost self-insert. It's made it really comforting that people relate to her so well, because it feels like they relate to me, when no one else does outside of the internet.

It's funny because I'm trying (and never making time) to plot out the original novel I plan on writing and there's this voice in my head like saying I have to be measured and I have to plot out these characters first and their whole histories and personalities because it's a Serious Thing, but then I'm reminded that the character I wrote who resonated the most with people was just me throwing my unhinged feelings into the void, so???

Also, I had intended my first original fantasy novel (featuring a chronically ill fmc and dragons) to have two main characters—Remi and Caden. Then Fourth Wing came out and I screeched in fury. I used the name for BRV anyway, but... 🙃

And the MMC for my sports romance is named Liam and I wanted to give the FMC a nice tough girl name like Sloane 😭 but I guess the universe said fuck you, again, so that's a nope, so if anyone has suggestions here I am.

[meichenxi]

Hanzi update (+accidental trauma talk)

tw illness, trauma, vomiting, weight loss, recovery. I didn't plan to write about this but because of what happened in the last year I can't really write about how I studied Chinese without talking about it. so. but it's mainly about hanzi lol

I've been learning how to write traditional characters with the vague idea that I'd go and study in Taiwan, and also that if I want to write Classical Chinese or Japanese they're far more useful - but the program I want to go to Taiwan for requires HSK7, which I DO not think I can achieve and have the results of before March. Who knows! Perhaps within me lies untold brilliance and dedication!!

...well, I wouldn't rely on it. (I am also busy with a job, a partner, studying an A-level course to begin tutoring it in September, and writing the second draft of my novel.)

And even if I ended up going to Taiwan with my absolutely fantastic HSK7, there's no way I could handwrite all of those words within a year. If I learn 10 characters a day, that's like 3650 characters in a year, but realistically that will never happen - and you still have to actually remember them.

I also know from my last experience where I learnt a stupid amount of characters very quickly (about 800 in two weeks) that I can technically do it, I have a very large swollen brain, but then the brain, being very large and very swollen, promptly burns out. And leaves me to not do any Chinese again for like two months. So basically - completely pointless, because after those two months of rest I had forgotten most of them anyway. I will not be doing that again.

This time around I have been slowly, very slowly, learning things on Skritter. I have about 400 characters so far. I'm not doing words but doing characters, which is a bit slower, but I figure it'll be more useful in the long run. After I have the first 1000, I'm planning to then systematically go through the HSK and TOCFL lists and check I know how to put characters together and which 'jing' is used in 'yijing' etc.

This approach is only really going to work because I know a lot of vocabulary and can read a lot of stuff already - otherwise I wouldn't recommend to anybody without that backbone of vocabulary to just learn random isolated characters, unless you're masochistic or much harder-core than I am.

As I have said in a lot of posts before, I had a very difficult experience in China last August and have basically taken an entire year off studying because in all honesty I just couldn't bring myself to face the language again. Every time I tried I had this crazy grief and nightmares and stress response. What I went through was so stressful that during those two months in China that I lost seven kilograms, as I couldn't eat much without vomiting it back up due to stress and fear, didn't sleep, and ended up having to leave for Thailand pretty severely malnutritioned - which then made me susceptible to illnesses there and I spent the next two months after with awful health, vomiting and weak and generally sick. Luckily I was with friends and I gained the weight again and my period and digestive system sorted itself out.

And I never expected that a language itself could carry trauma? Like. Nobody died, it wasn't like that, I wasn't abused or assaulted or anything but still...for just under a year, every time I spoke or heard or read Chinese I couldn't help thinking of those two months. Even now it's still hard. I'm finding my way back to it but, to be honest, I didn't expect how hard it would be. I thought I could just - move past it, because I'd already had so many great experiences in China and Taiwan and with Chinese, that they would cancel each other out or at least be aided by the huge amounts of love that the language has shown me. Alas, it was not the case.

Anyway. All of that to say - I have only managed to do about 400 characters in a year, because I essentially gave up studying completely.

Now I've just finished reviewing and re-remembering those 400 characters on Skritter, so I'm ready to start again! I don't know what's changed, I guess just time - I feel more positive, I feel curious and interested about the language again. I don't know. I'm not going to question it too deeply. But for these past two weeks, I've been having a lot of fun :)

I'll update everyone on my progress as I go! Next post - 500.

[accirax]

(Reminder that you need to click the link that's beneath the screenshot.)

Already read the translation. Hopefully you can too because it's hilarious!

agreed, the three of them (and Jake as well) should be friends. although, i don't know if Drew really has any bullshit for Dan to put up with? he seems like a pretty chill guy. really, it's more Dan and Drew having to try to talk Tom out of whatever trouble he's gotten into now, yet Tom still following his heart and making mistakes constantly.

i'm also going to combine some more of the tweet asks below the cut!

This is actually pretty cute ngl. (saying as someone who doesn't particularly care for aleriya either way (though I can see the appeal/aesthetic))

ooh, they look good in red! maybe it should've been the red team instead of the yellow team. well, then we'd have to put Grett and Yul in red as well. maybe not.

this artist did a great job of capturing all of the detail in the costumes, and i like the kinda painterly brush they used. even though i don't ship aleriya either, they totally look like they'd be the romantic leads of a kids' picture book.

Aww~ :)

stop staring at me with them big ol' eyes-- (/j)

very cute! i like the color palette. sucks that this baby already has to wear glasses, though. imagine your eyesight being so terrible that you have to wear glasses before you can even read.

(or, maybe they're Cheryll's glasses. that would be precious.)

Love the redraw! :)

Aiden looks so over it, lol. as if you wouldn't be doing the exact same thing if James was out there doing cartwheels.

the artist did a good job reinterpreting the pose with the more realistic proportions of their style. maybe i should try doing some Disventure Camp pose redraws someday; that could be fun. although, i'd wager that the next DC thing that i draw will probably relate to season 4, though i can't say that for sure.

AWWWW!!!! X3 Really hoping that we get, at the very least a 5 second cameo of Drew in TomJake, since they all live in Canada. I need it. I miss my baby. He was gone too soon. ;-; I won't lie, I personally do not care for Jake and Tom getting a spinoff story, AT ALL. But I might end up watching it anyway, for the extra lore. And who knows, if it gets enough views and does well enough in the community, it *might* convince Jared and Robert to make spinoffs for other characters. Like Drew. Or Ashley. Or Alec (which is what I'm hoping most for if you could n't already tell).

the pose sort of reminds me of a polaroid that they would show in the credits of the movie to reassure that everyone is having a great time after the plot is over. actually, i guess it has similar vibes to the canon instagram post of Ellie and Tess graduating, so maybe that's where i got that idea, lol.

including Drew as a background gag would honestly be a brilliant idea. like, Jake runs off somewhere, and in the background, there's just Drew holding up a piece of paper that says "???". i have no clue where in Canada Drew and Tom/Jake/Miriam live-- the country is quite large, so it could be an equivalent distance to Ashley living in Texas and Ellie/Tess living in New York-- but given that Ellie will be in the series, someone is travelling somewhere! so it's definitely possible.

i'm pretty neutral on the TomJake series, mostly because i don't know what it's going to be about. in a best case scenario, it's a delayed wrap-up to All Stars, further exploring some of the plot threads that weren't fully developed leading up to and after Riya's win. in a worst case scenario, it's a disjointed collection of mildly confusing fanservice, a la "Derek and Trevor accidentally kiss in the shower." (i actually liked that episode as a whole, but man was that moment in particular cringe.) i'm definitely going to watch it just so that i know what's up, but i do feel like they probably could have better used this time elsewhere (more staff stories, official season epilogue, start s4 faster).

but, Sapphire, if they did an Ashley, Drew, or Alec spinoff, how would they lure people in by putting gay people in the thumbnail??? (/s) mostly kidding, but i'm sure it is true that they were willing to bank on a TomJake series because they knew that those popular characters would get the clicks. if we got another spinoff, it'd probably be jaiden-centric, lmao.

of course, Ashley and especially Alec are also pretty popular, so it's not outside of the realm of possibility! an Alec series would definitely good, to clarify his relationship with Fiore, learn a bit more about his family, and perhaps touch on what Riya's up to after the show. an Ashley show i fear would lack any conflict (because she slays at life so hard), but maybe we could learn a bit about her family too.

They would make a neat duo ngl. If Dan ever made it to All-Stars that is. 😅 I actually remember one Ally greeting where she said she thought Dan was a pretty cool/nice guy and how unfair it was the way Gabby cheated him in eliminations, or something along those lines. I can try to find it later.

oh, these two could definitely make a nerd alliance. throw in Alec and Lake and you'll have brains that brawn and beauty should definitely watch out for.

are Ally, Dan, and Alec the only (main) characters thus far to wear glasses? oh, i guess there's Oliver too. typecast fr.

Enjoy this random art of Lill leading a family of ducks

so cute!!!!! i love the ducks' little hats and scarves. the purple team deserved an animal mascot. i bet Ashley would love to pet these little guys as well :)

Add Dan, Drew & Tess and this book club is complete! 😁

"Disventure HS" intrigues me. is this an AU where they're all students in high school? even if Alec was a senior and Fiore was a freshman, having them that close in age would be cursed as hell. hopefully Alec is just the literal librarian. maybe it's "bring your niece figure to work day".

Ellie/Alec/Fiore/Lake/Dan/Drew/Tess would be a really interesting tribe to start with. i wonder who would get voted out first?

Hm. Interesting chart. The one I agree most with is that I definitely would've liked to see an interaction between Tess and Alec. Those two do have quite a few things in common (quiet, reserved/introverted, level headed, fairly intelligent, logical, lone wolves who like to read, etc.) so I'm sure they would've clicked well with each other. Eh, who knows? Maybe there was some interaction at the motel off camera. Though that is mostly just wishful thinking, since I highly doubt either of them would ever see a reason to talk to the other with how little they know about each other, being from separate seasons and all.

yeah, and Alec was in the Motel for a pretty short amount of time (2 episodes, maybe like 5 days). canonically, he probably spent a lot of that time talking to Fiore and then Connor. Perhaps Ellie and Grett as well.

god knows Alec could use a therapist friend, though. maybe if people started following each other online, they could wind up chatting with each other then! or, i'm sure Alec would read Lake's book someday, so he could at least see her illustrations then.

i think you can probably guess which box i agree with most. (it's the favorite friendship one)

thanks for sharing all of these tweets with me!

[misc-obeyme]

So uh... Lesson 18 huh??

I'd just like to say that the juxtaposition of Lesson 18 being all sad and serious with the new event being all ridiculous was both weird and kinda nice? Like I needed that event to cheer me up after Lesson 18 almost made me cry.

Anyway, let's talk about it! Lesson 18 spoilers below!

Okay. I've seen some speculation that perhaps Lesson 20 won't be the end of season one. However, I don't think that's going to happen.

I think they're gonna pull some time travel shenanigans on us again. Or Nightbringer is gonna show up and deus ex machina this mess. Or the solution to everything is for MC to just make a pact with all seven brothers at the same time. Solomon did say that he thought they could do that in a past lesson. And if they do it all at once, it wouldn't take that long? Hmmm.

Anyway, I could speculate all day, but there were some really interesting things that happened in this lesson that I'd rather talk about.

First of all, Diavolo pulling out the Prince Voice on Raphael had me going OHHHHH lol.

I honestly love Diavolo's different sides. It makes him feel so real, you know?

SPOILERS FOR HARD LESSON 18 (just skip this paragraph in case you haven't gotten to it yet!)

And I feel like that really is even more evident in the hard lesson where he talks to Barbatos about the difference between his head and his heart. And how all he really wants is for the brothers to be happy. Which was so dang sweet. And Barbatos just gives him that whole speech about what a great king he's gonna be. I was like I can't with these two.

HARD LESSON SPOILERS OVER

Anyway, the fact that Diavolo can just step into this Prince persona and be a leader when he needs to, but then he's just a silly guy when he's not needing to do that is very realistic to me. A lot of people have different versions of themselves that they only show at certain times or to certain people. Gives his character a lot of dimension, in my opinion!

And oh... can we talk about Mammon?

My precious baby. I wanted to hug him so bad. I wanted him to continue to chew out Raphael. I mean, I know Raph is kinda just the messenger here, but I felt like Mammon was actually saying what everyone was feeling, but was too restrained to say. For some reason, everyone was just kind of letting Diavolo take the lead (and I guess that makes sense, he is the Prince after all and Raphael is basically saying they'll go to war over this). But Mammon was like oh hell no.

I agreed with him entirely. The Celestial Realm can go fuck off. I was NOT expecting this to be about the fact that the brothers have power in the Devildom now. Like are you kidding me? THAT is your big concern? Should've thought about that before you threw them out, GOD.

And when Raphael was like are you questioning Father's word to Lucifer and Luci just kinda got sad looking, I was like YES QUESTION HIM because Lucifer and his brothers deserve better than this bullshit.

It really feels like the Celestial Realm booted them out because the bros did something they didn't like, but now they've realized they made a mistake. So to get them back, they're gonna go down to the Devildom and threaten them.

Are they trying to get us to hate the Celestial Realm? Is that the goal here? I don't, obviously, but I think this was a pretty shitty move considering all that these guys have been through.

BUT THEN THE BROTHERS COMIN THROUGH WITH THE WE WON'T LEAVE SATAN

when I tell you I was crying... it was Belphie's fault.

Pretty sure this was the line that made me tear up, but then we get the same sentiment from Beel and Asmo about not leaving Satan behind and I was just like that was MY HEART you guys just shattered.

Now let's talk about Solomon and Barbatos in 18-A, shall we?

Please refer to this collection of screenshots featuring my true love dishing out some real insults.

WOW. Let him have it, Barb.

I don't know what Solomon did, but I do find this exchange incredibly interesting. Note that Solomon is wearing his human world outfit here. I kind of think human-world-outfit-wearing-Solomon is the imposter. He's the one who talked about the pact with Asmo first, where it didn't fit with his later version of the story. He was also the one who pushed all the brothers into Asmo's tub and therefore also the one who then made a pact with Asmo. He was also the one who commanded Barb to make a portal when he didn't want to and who had the discussion with Nightbringer.

I'm just sayin... maybe he doesn't know why Barb is mad at him 'cause we got more than one Solomon running around...

Buuut I could be completely off base here. We'll see, I guess!

This could all be resolved by the end of Lesson 20, you never know with this game lol.

[dragiani2]

GRAH IM SO LATE TO IT BUT IM ASKING ABOUT THE BIOLOGY OF YOUR GORE FOUR DRAWING BECAUSE YOUR ART IS SO GOOD AND IM SO DANG CURIOUS!!!!!!!!!💥💥💥

HOLY FUCKING SHIT HI I'M A HUGE FAN OF THE SPECULATIVE BEHAVIOR AND BIOLOGY STUFF YOU'RE DOING!!!!

(I'm majoring in environmental science at the moment and plan to do a masters/phd in entomology I fucking love biology and shit man)

okay so first of all what I'm most excited about :]

(sorry for the shitty image quality I'm on my laptop so I had to do this in paint)

I'm going to explain stuff in case someone reading doesn't know what something is.

The area circled in red is a hydrostatic skeleton!! A hydrostatic skeleton is basically just a fluid filled cavity that acts as structural support for muscles and organs. Annelids, Platyhelminthes, and even Echinoderms have hydrostatic skeletons!

The bright blue ring I'm pointing to with green arrows are hearts! They're modeled after a worm's! hehehegahha he's such an invertebrate i swear

As for the brightly colored circles, that's really just based on that one cross section we got of Four when he was trying to eliminate Spongey in BFB 16. Realistically that would be muscles and more organs but I ain't drawing all that.

I didn't add this in but I also kind of have an idea that algebraliens breathe through spiracles just like insects, but theirs have evolved/developed way further and have become very efficient. (spiracles are the least efficient respiratory system irl)

I don't actually think his intestines would have growths like this (think of how little purpose they would serve, and hell they could probably puncture his other organs) but I wanted to pay tribute to the exit lol. I actually think he probably has a specialized organ for the pocket dimension that would rest somewhere in his abdomen. I think it would branch off from his throat much like how the windpipe does! So he does have an actual stomach, he just chooses where stuff goes!

So yeah that's my biology shit!! Abhinaoaju I've been debating starting my own algebralien speculative biology project but idk