#It's almost 3 am I'm so tired I need to go to sleep lol

[call-me-chips]

Some random Renegades incorrect quotes

Enjoy!

[piplupod]

i haven't gotten a single thing done today other than eating 🧍‍♂️

[gaiathemexicanbeauty]

it only takes a taste | mike schmidt x reader

word count: 1.6k

warnings: none! this is just pure fluff and maybe kind of slowburnish lol

this was loosely based off of it only takes a taste from the waitress musical! :3

idk i just really like the idea of late nights with mike even if he's too tired to even think straight lmao

also don't ask what time period this takes place in, i was born in 2004 and know like 2 things about the 70s-90s or whenever the movie takes place bc its never explicitly mentioned

i also do not regularly bake or cook so do not be afraid to go to my comment section and tell me if something sounds off

i love this man ok, i have said it 1000 times already but i've been in love with him ever since i first saw him when i was like 12 or 13 and was even more so obsessed with rebornica's mike design for YEARS. 12 year old me would have an aneurism if she knew about the fnaf movie

you let out a long yawn, one hand reaching up cover your mouth so as not to potentially ruin the mood of any customers around; granted, there was only two and they were graveyard shifters from somewhere outside of town but customers are customers. you'd been working at sparky's for a couple of months now, figuring it was an easy way to make some cash and keep food on the table. of course, you hadn't accounted for the very long hours that passed where you half debated trying to sneak away since no was around from 2-4:00 am: your boss would kill you, though, and you wanted to stay employed.

soft oldies music plays in the background as you glance over at the clock ticking away on the wall. just as you move to grab a rag to clean the counters for the 5th time during your shift, you hear the bell above the entrance jingle and don't even have to look up to know who it is.

mike wasn't a regular at first, just someone who popped in at random and very quietly asked for a coffee. after a while of starting a new job, he started coming in at almost 11:00 pm everyday and always asking for the same thing: just a plain, black coffee. "seriously?" you had said with a smirk the first time he said his order to you, your eyes widening at the attitude you had just given a customer. fortunately, mike was quick to respond with a tired but good natured laugh, his hands folded in front of him. "i'm all ears if you have other recommendations." he mumbled with a smile tugging at the corner of his lips, giving you instant relief.

now, it was just clockwork. "hey." mike sighs with a soft sigh, rubbing a hand over his eyes as he takes a seat at a chair by the counter you were standing behind. "coffee machine is kind of acting up tonight, you're gonna have to give it a minute. want anything else while you wait?" you say as you approach the counter, giving him a quick smile. mike is about to decline your offer, his lips parting to say something before his eyes land on something on the farther end of the counter. "what about that? still good?" "you're just in time. i was going to take the rest of it home." you say with a smile, walking over to the cake stand holding an apple pie with only 3 slices left of it. you take the lid off to plate it, handing it over to mike with a hum before bringing him utensils. you don't even get the chance to bring up to him that the slices have been sitting there for a couple of hours, blinking in shock at the way he's quick to start eating.

you turn your back to start taking down the chalkboard advertising the special from the day before, giving mike his one moment of quiet you were sure he needed. you start to think about what your day will consist of once you're done with your shift, dreading having to clean your room before you can actually sleep. "did you make this?" "yeah. why, is it bad?" you say with a chuckle, turning to look at mike again; your eyes widen a bit at the way mike is looking at you, his own eyes looking at you like he can't believe what he just put it in his mouth. "no, no, it's..it's really good, like. really good." your cheeks redden a bit at the sudden compliment, pushing a piece of hair behind your ear as you occasionally glance at him enjoying the pie you'd made; you wouldn't say you were amazing at cooking but you definitely knew enough to make a meal that would do more than just feed you.

it also didn't help that you'd been harboring a crush on mike for the past month. that you were aware of, he didn't have a partner of any kind but that might have been more to do with the fact he didn't have time for one than anything else. you at first brushed it off as just not having contact with anyone your age that late at night, just enjoying his company when nights got lonely. but you couldn't deny the way you would style your hair a bit differently or try a new perfume in the hopes of getting a compliment from mike; to your absolute pleasure, he almost always pointed it out. now to hear this sudden praise for your cooking took you out of your element.

"thanks, really, but i make it all the time. i can make thousands like it and they'll all be the same." you say with a light chuckle, crossing your arms against your chest as you look over at the cake stand sheepishly. "then maybe you should consider getting a day job making these instead." mike says between bites, giving you a playful smile. you can't help but scoff despite the smile on your face, looking over at mike again. "well, if it's that easy, maybe YOU should quit your job and come and join me. keep me company." the two of you have a quiet laugh, your cheeks reddening at the indirect compliment you had paid him. once his plate is empty, you take it away from him just to have an excuse to do something with your hands (also to get away from the almost fond look that mike was giving you right now, definitely not on par for him). there's a tense silence between the two of you before mike speaks up, clearing his throat when he speaks. "uh, i tried making that at home. the pie, i mean. i don't remember what kind it was right now, but it definitely didn't end as well as that." he says with a nervous laugh, hands folded in front of him again as you hear the coffee machine start to pour out his drink.

"well, what exactly did you do wrong?" with surprisingly no hesitance, mike goes on to tell the story of how sure he was about this recipe he'd seen in a catalogue, going above and beyond to make sure this "stupid thing" (his words) came out right. little did he know leaving his creation unattended for even a second would result in smoke pouring out of the oven and having to throw out a charred-black pastry; "and then abby went and acted like we could just go and do it all over again and.." mike starts, hands waving around uncharacteristically as he finished off his story. he caught the way you were trying to hold back a laugh, fingers pressed to your lips that were etched into a small smile. "it's ok, you can laugh all you want. i never tried doing it again." you can't help the laugh that leaves you once he gives you his full permission, still trying to keep your voice down. "i-i'm sorry, really.." you giggle once you've calmed down, rubbing your hands over your face before you start to walk around the counter to where mike is sitting. "but that's not how making a pie works. you can't just leave it like that or give up on the process that easily."

mike makes a face that says 'i'm listening', shrugging his shoulders when you sit on the stool next to him. "making a pie is like.." you start with a sigh, hands propping up your chin in thought as you look up at the clock. "you just know when some things feel right. if something is too much or too little, whether you need to start again or not. lord knows i've had to redo entire pies because the crust wasn't flaky enough or the filling didn't taste like apples enough." you say, chuckling a bit as you remember all the times you'd slaved away for almost entire days trying to nail down the perfect home recipe. you take a minute to think again, sitting back a bit as you smooth down your apron tied around your waist. "and it also doesn't help if you make something just to make something. when you bake or just cook a plain old steak, you have to make it like you're crafting a story or making a song. all of my best meals were made with someone or something in mind."

your cheeks go red again when you realize the very unprompted ramble you went on, a nervous laugh leaving you as you look down at your lap. "sorry, you totally don't have to-" "no, no, i-" the two of you jump a bit at the way you both try to speak first, sheepish smiles tugging at your lips before you go quiet again. the bell above the door jingles and you don't have to look up to know the two of you are alone now. "i like hearing about that sort of stuff. i really only hear about it when i'm here with you and it's..nice. different." your heart soars and you can only hope that mike can't somehow feel or hear it, trying to give him a warm smile without saying something you'll regret. you get up from your seat with a when he checks his watch, knowing that's code for 'i need to go' even before he stands. you're almost sure he'll leave without saying anything which you are simultaneously grateful for and hoped he wouldn't do, already busying yourself with some other menial task. "hey."

you look up almost as soon as he speaks, seeing the smile tugging at his lips and not able to contain your own. "save those leftovers for me. i hope it still tastes like you were trying to make it for me when i get back." he says, a smug look in his eyes as your lips part a bit in shock. you try to call out to him before he jogs out to his car, taking off accordingly.

-> ta da its done! :D <-

this was honestly less romantic than i wanted it to be but i promise that my brain is racked with thoughts of him literally EVERY DAY so mayhaps i can write something else that's more up to par one of these days

but thank yall for reading! :D i haven't been able to pump out a oneshot like this for a while and it felt good to write something longer than a couple of paragraphs, i have missed this account sm 🐺💗 love yall and i hope that you all are having a fantastic day!

[casualpersonapersonpeach]

I'm in terrible pain on my neck and and shoulder-blades, so I needed comfort from my favorite slashers. You know the pain you get on your neck and upper-back that you can hardly turn or rotate your head or lift your arms up without hurting yourself?

Well I was hoping if you can write where the slashers (Jason Voorhees, Bubba Sawyer, Thomas Hewitt, Michael Myers, and your choice of slasher) help their S/O through the days with bad muscle joints (such as brushing their hair, lift heavy stuff, get them dressed, etc.) But the S/O whimpers a bit, not just in pain but how bad they felt for having their hubbies do this sort of labor for them. I can imagine that the slashers would have such big hearts.

Hey! I have experienced this a few times before. It's awful 😭. Sorry again it took me so long to get this done! I hope you enjoy !!!

Slashers nursing their injured S/O

Includes Jason Voorhees, Bubba Sawyer, Thomas Hewitt, Michael Myers, and a silent brother 💀 DISCLAIMER: i know u can't be with a silent brother but this is MY PAGE so Idc 😭💀 i can't be bothered trying to figure out the technicalities lol.

Jason Voorhees

It was 3 am when you screamed out in pain when you tried to roll onto your other side, and jason jolted to your side immediately.

There was such an intense pain in your neck, you could hardly move. So jason signs " What's the matter, love???! What's wrong??" He stares at you with anxious eyes.

You explain what's wrong in a few huffs. He finally understood. He can't recall if this is something he's ever experienced before, maybe when he was little and his mother, Pamela, would have taken such great care of him.

He thinks he should be attentive to you like his mother was to him, and he assures you anything you need he is willing to do in a heartbeat.

He allows you to sleep in, and as you awake in the late morning, you find jason sitting at your bed side with some herbal tea he mustered from the forest. He crawls to your side and signs "I'm going to sit you up, please tell me if it hurts. I promise I'll hold your head as gently as possible". He lifted you so slowly and gently as he rested you against his chest. With one hand he holds your head and the other guides the tea for you to sip as you please.

Jason is so worried about you. What if you get worse? He's too worried thinking the worst when you may have just pulled a muscle and need a rest day.

Once he knows you're done, he carries you so carefully into the bathtub, he thinks some warm water will help ease your muscles. After washing you, he wraps you in a towel and sits you in his lap as he gets a brush and combs through your wet hair slowly and methodically.

You let out a whimper and he freezes like a deer in headlights. "Did I hurt you darling??". "No, it just feels so nice. Thank you my love, you've been doing so much for me. I feel so bad about it". He signs back- "Don't be silly, it's not a burden for me, I just want to make sure you're okay".

Jason notices you start to get tired, so he gets your pyjamas and puts your clothing on for you, guiding your limbs so that he can do the work for you.

He lays you in bed and wraps you in as many furs and blankets as he can to help aid you and holds you so closely, in hopes to send you to sleep.

Bubba Sawyer

The day prior, you had been helping bubba out in the field. He insisted that you stay inside, away from the wretched texan heat, but to no avail.

You were helping bubba repair some fences along the property line and carrying some of the new wooden planks.

When you awoke the next day, you couldn't even move without being in so much pain. The wood was older and so heavy. Your shoulders felt like they were on fire. You felt so weak. Bubba knew the exact feeling, so when he heard you yelp in pain, it was almost like he didn't need to ask.

He blurted out a few sounds, and since you knew bubba so well, you could tell what he was saying through his behaviours, sounds and expressions. You mustered up enough strength to say "My neck, it's sore. I can't move".

Drayton didn't care that you were in pain, he demanded that you and bubba were to go back out in the fields. Bubba tried to stand up for you, but Drayton blew a fuse.

Bubba had come up with a plan to ensure you wouldn't have to lift a finger, and to keep his brothers rage at bay.

Bubba signals that he just needs a few minutes. He runs outside and grabs a sun chair, a tall pole and big umbrella, along with a beer crate with a cold drink of tea for you. He set up the chair with some pillows so you could rest and be protected from the heat.

Bubba lifts you carefully, and walks you out to his nice set up for you. He carefully places you down, and kneels beside you. He looks at you with so much love and affection.

You grunt as you adjust in your seat. "Thank you so much Baby. This means the world to me. I love you, but I can't help but feel guilty that you're doing all this work. And I'm just sitting here" He replies with sounds as what you could guess as "I love you too, baby. Rest up. I don't want you to worry".

Bubba didn't mention his third part of the plan. He wanted you to watch him out in the heat working hard, admiring him. While he got to show off and impress his dear s/o.

When the sun begun to set, and you had finished your cup of iced tea, bubba carries you back home. He promises he will get you a nice, hearty meal and get you to bed early. There wasn't anywhere else you wanted to be.

Thomas Hewitt

You were out on a walk in a forest nearby the farm with Thomas. You felt a slight pinch in your neck, so you stopped for a second. Thomas looked at you with concern as you reassured him "I'm alright, my necks just a little sore".

You two continued your hike till nightfall, you two cuddled up into bed and slept. You awoke at 12 am, feeling disoriented as you struggled to turn over. Thomas woke up and was a little confused but certainly concerned.

He held you and comforted you till you slept again. He always thought sleep was the best medicine. When it came to the morning, he realised that his methods of sleeping off pain didn't always work.

He started to feel guilty about trying to get you to sleep it off. He knows it was well intended, but he hated to imagine how much pain you were in. What if you thought he was dismissing you? He made a silent vow to make it up to you.

Thomas helped you shower. He wishes that the water cylinder was in better condition so the water wasn't so... Lukewarm. You barely noticed it since you were in so much pain anyways.

He leaned you against his body as he used the loofa on you, gently washing and caressing you. He had remembered something about lavender oil being relaxing, so after he dried you off, he decided to massage some onto your body.

He made an effort to pay special attention to your shoulders and your calf muscles.

You couldn't help but feel bad that he was doing so much for you, while also having to balance hard work and his.... less than conventional family.

"Thomas.. you really didn't have to do all of this for me. What If your uncles get upset at you?"

All he does is look at you, and shushes you. You know he only means to assure you it's okay. He will manage to shoulder it.

You fall asleep again to his touch. Once Thomas is certain you are comfortable in your slumber, he leaves the room to go about his daily chores. The only thing consuming his mind is you, hoping his efforts might have helped you recover, even just a little.

Michael Myers

Michael was on another one of his... late night hunts when you decided you should get some sleep. You woke up in the late afternoon, to Michael just sitting upright in your shared bed sneaking candy corn up his mask to eat.

The sight of your big, tough man so sneakily eating candy make you burst into laughter. He had seemed like a child sneaking into the lounge on early Christmas morning to open his presents much before anybody was awake.

Quickly that laughter turned into yelping in pain. The intensity of your laugh had awakened such an intense pain in your neck mainly, but also your shoulders and the rest of your body.

Michael was very confused at first. He thought you were just hiding some sort of gremlin laugh from him. But soon after he realised you were genuinely just in pain.

He quickly cradled your face, he wanted you to explain to him what was wrong. And after you had told him, he decided he needed to do anything about it.

He went to get you a glass of water. Would that help? He gently sat you up against him, reminding you to let him move you. He tried to feed you the glass of water, but this sort of thing (being affectionate) was so unfamiliar to him before you came into his life.

His body wasn't quite used to making such gentle and slow movements. It was almost like his fine motor skills were learning something so brand new.

Before he knew it, his hands were shaky and he spilt the water on your (his) shirt. He huffed in frustration. Why couldn't he do this? Surely it wasn't so hard. You assured him "It's okay Michael, you're just trying to help me. Trust me it's okay".

Michael is the most stubborn person (or thing?) to exist ever, so it took him a while to stop pouting and swallow his pride. He realised he needed to get you out of that wet shirt though.

He gestured that he would change your clothes. He lifted off your shirt, wiped you down and gently put a fresh shirt on you. Hey, would you look at that. He's finally getting the hang of this.

Though he wouldn't let anybody live if they had witnessed soft michael. Only you get to see this side of him.

Michael got some of his favourite candies from his secret stash he never shared. But how could he resist this time?. You were in pain, and maybe this would help since you couldn't really do too much today, or maybe even for the next few days.

He handed you the plate, and you could tell that there was a childish grin on his face.

"oh Michael, you shouldn't have. This is so sweet of you.. I'm sorry I'm not of much help right now" Michael just put a finger to your lips to shush you.

He promised he'd take care of all the chores, and cooking while you needed to recover. Worry not my sweet one.

The Silent Brother

LMAO THIS ONE IS NOT A SLASHER IK ITS JUST FOR MY OWN FAN SERVICE 💀💀💀

You were visiting your lover in secret. Well, only you thought it was going to be secret, the silent brothers can read your mind anyways.

You found the secret entrance to their layer in the city of bones, so you walked in quietly. You were beginning to feel light headed and this continuous pinch in your neck.

You thought nothing of it and traveled lower into the chambers to see your lover. All of the brothers knew what was going on. And not that they couldn't approve of it, they didn't really see themselves getting in between you two. That was for their brother to decide if this is truly part of his will.

You run to him and embrace him, and he stands there so stiff and awkwardly, he wraps his arms around you.

It's not that he doesn't enjoy this, it's just such a forgotten sensation. He had sacrificed so many parts of his humanity, so he didn't think much of these mortal affections.

You tell him that you just wanted to see him. But in the back of your mind, you're wondering why this annoying pain isn't going away. And you begin to wonder why it keeps growing more intense.

He reads your mind, and speaks to you telekinetically, in such a husky voice. "You've done something to your neck I presume. Do not worry. I will take care of this".

He leads you to an empty room and guides you to sit down. He raises his scarred hands to your neck and uses some healing magic to help you. "It'll take half of an hour to work. Just sit here with me until you feel better my love".

You sigh and lean into him, as he wraps an arm around you. Being with somebody like him was so strange. He had so little of his humanity left in him. He seemed cold, less emotional and like he was so out of this realm.

But that's what you really loved about him. He was mysterious and otherworldly. No one could compare to a creature like him. He was the most interesting being you ever laid your eyes on.

And he was strangely attentive, in his own way of course. It just enticed you further and further down this spiral with him. All that you knew is that you deeply loved each other. And how love can be shown in such different, and strange ways.

[kanmom51]

JK Live 4 October 2023

21:01 or 9:01 pm KST

cr./To all the creators of the media used in this post.

I was waiting for this, and kind of expecting this to happen, lol.

He said he'd be live at 9 pm. And yes, you can say, it's unintentional, a coincidence, but I say NO.

Both JK and JM have shown us over the years their attention to the numbers, the dates.

Starting the live at 9:01 was intentional.

9/1 or 1/9, however you look at it!!

Let's talk about the live, why don't we?

It was definitley an interesting one.

In a gist, JK shut down (well tried to) the whole Mingyu shipping shit. He most definitley shut down TKKs. I actually kinda, maybe (not really), felt sorry for them.

He listened to all the members songs, with certain degrees of favouritism and certain degrees of, well, not...

He drank. Like a lot. I think maybe someone needs to fill him in on the secret that alcohol does have calories. Yes, whiskey might not be as bad as beer on that front, but drinking as much and then not eating cause he's dieting... well, not the healthiest choice. And this is not, god forbid, me mothering or smothering him. His health is important for his performance (he says that himself), not to mention, man is constantly hungry. Eat more, is what I'm saying.

He once again demonstrated his neuro-divergency (that whole clean up session he had in the kitchen, lol).

He showed us, again that's it's all about choices.

He got pensive and serious at a point and said some very important things, which I will, of course, discuss here in my post.

He is super tired, but really struggling to sleep.

He is fighting so hard to drop the cute image, but man, it's just imbedded in him. He is so cute!!!

And he is so genuine.

He is genuine.

Let us begin our journey into JK's almost 1.5 hour live (yep, we are back to those, lol).

He starts out telling us he just got home from the company, and that he hasn't even prepared his glass (of drink) - kind of solidifies my belief that the 9:01 pm starting time was meaningful and intentional, because then he goes and prepares his glass and drink.

He invited us to have drinks with him, so as he's preparing his own drink he tells us to fill up our glasses as well, lol. Throughout the live he has 3 highballs, and by the end of the live admits he's kind of drunk. Which is not that surprising given he is drinking on an empty stomach (as high as his tolerance to alcohol may be).

He explains he came on Weverse on the 4th and not earlier because of his solo album announcement. Golden. Makes a toast with us to celebrate it. And he talks a little about it as well.

He tells us how Golden represented him after debut. We know him as the Golden maknae, he mentions I think GC (which for some reason they translate as golden chest and not golden closet, maybe because whoever is translating isn't aware of golden closet, who knows...), how he wrote a poem called Golden (the one JM went all gushy about, if you recall), And also "this moment is like a golden period for me." - Golden hour perhaps? Kind of fits with his choice of lighting for the live as well. Just saying.

And there you have it!!!

And after seeing this, go back and take another look at his concept photo...

The album includes 3D and the clean and explicit versions of Seven. 11 songs on it, which means we will get to hear 8 new songs!!!

He also explains how he thought he would release an ep and somehow it became a full album.

He didn't give too much info (well, he couldn't of course), but told us the title track has a performance and he's practicing, like A LOT. He wants to do well and is giving it his best. He also lets us know that the title song is a hard one and will be awesome!! I do hope this one is not a collab though (just my own wishes here). He is confident we will like it, and says we can look forward to it. I know I am.

He's complaining about how his body isn't the same, he's exhausted. Well JK my man, you wanted to be a adult, and us adults, we grow old too, lol...

He says "there is nothing that is making me stressed out, I am just tired." Now, that could be meant about the album being released, or the performance he's preparing for. But it could also be more...

He says he's keeping his voice down and wanted to be calm and have "older bro vibe", lol.

He wants to go with older bro vibe. Appear to be more mature? Since his full album is coming out?

Ok, so I'm going to say this here. The translation is somewhat off and wacky. I felt this with JM's live on 1st September with some of it, and I feel the same here as well. The whole golden chest thing, the "I'm keeping the weight down" when he's talking about the older bro vibe, and more... It feels like a. whoever is doing this doesn't know JK too much (the golden chest is a big clue), and b. are they just translating literally and not the actual sentence meaning?

JK shares with us how tired he is, how he's still having trouble sleeping, that he practiced real hard today and that his upcoming schedule is hellish. I can only imagine. He's really worried, "will I be good at this?"

Now, let's stop here for a second shall we? Didn't he just minutes before tell us he's not stressed out? So, perhaps that wasn't about the album and promotions at all? Perhaps that was more about the white noise shitshow that was going on in the background? Telling us that isn't bothering him, all while now sharing with us that what he is worried about is if he'll be good enough, do well enough with his performances?

He shows us he got an IV today, needs to replenish himself, yet he hasn't eaten. "I have to take care of my body too". Yes he does. But at the same time he says he has to lose weight. It kind of frustrates me, but then again, this is their reality, as idols. I just wish there would be less pressure on them in that aspect.

He reads a comment telling him to do well, says he will.

And then this:

Ok, so thing is, please raise your hand if you actually do believe the commenter was asking JK if he loves Taehyun of TXT.

No show of hands I see.

Lmao.

Nah, when this happened I didn't have the comments on and in any case wouldn't have been able to read them, not knowing Korean. But I kind of felt like maybe whoever wrote it wasn't Karmy and misspelled it perhaps? And then I saw this.

So here's the thing. If this was a misspell, makes sense that JK was maybe blissfully unaware of the intent of the comment.

But if this was indeed spelled out correctly, I kind of have my doubts he didn't read it right, especially given he says it twice before answering. And he's off telling us about TXT Taehyun. Whom he spoke with on the phone that day. He's so well mannered and cute, while being an old soul. Ok, here we go with another Taekook ship, lol. JK spoke to someone - must be something going on there. No wonder the man is so damn tired... Seven days a week seven sets of sheets... (eww... NOOOOOOO). No, but seriously, did we know that Taehyun was a good friend of JK's? No we didn't. Now we do.

Not seeing it doesn't mean it's not there!!!

It's funny how JK runs himself down constantly. Like the man is so intelligent. Perhaps not book smart (which is why he keeps saying he's not smart), but not everything about life is learnt from a book, and his emotional intelligence and artistic intelligence are next level. But he keeps running himself down, and I kind of feel that sometimes fans only hear or see that of him, instead of seeing his art and listen to what actually comes out of his mouth when he starts speaking about the deeper things.

Again, the "I'm Jungkook's girlfriend" comments. Ugh yuck. Like shut the fuck up already. But he just brushes it off. Reads it, asks what they are doing at this hour and snickers.

Comment "I really love you a lot". JK "I think I love you more". This is once again JK cementing just how great his love for army is. He will talk about it more later too.

Look, man loves army. We can't even start to understand the connection he has with army, given his whole career, starting out at such an early age and going through all the struggles that they went through to get where they are right now, feeling that it's because this sense of loyalty and love that army have for them. So yes, he loves army.

And another idiot in the comments asking JK to take off his shirt. Of course these people are flooding his comments. Funny how his reaction is:

Yes he giggles, but he's uncomfortable. And asks why they even said that. "It's embarrassing".

Happy that he called them out. As if it will help though.

JK shows us his Vogue magazine, the hip hop concept, which he says he liked the most.

Ok, so this was maybe intentional (I kinda feel it was), maybe not, but cute none the less.

He talks about how the comments are lagging, slow, and says:

and then he thinks for a second, eyes looking to the side (mind working), and goes:

Kind of random, don't you think?

Coming up with the 13 seconds lagging.

And happening to end up with 10-13. 🤣🤣

So, he started the live at 9-1 and now we have 10-13!!!

I'd say, either this was intentional (him stopping to think might just hint to that) or the man has 13 etched on his brain. 13 and 10, which is kind of coming up very soon...

Next JK talks about the TikTok he deleted.

Now here's the thing. On Stationhead JK said he saw the trend and wanted to do it. Not a word about doing the opposite of the trend. Going "the other way". JK isn't saying he didn't want us to see the clip he uploaded (which kind of might have been what was understood from what he said in Stationhead, and maybe that's why he's clarifying here). He says he wanted his TikTok to be for dancing and that's why he deleted. He also seems to be happy that army had seen it and spread it around regardless of him deleting. So, he wanted us to see it, but better it not be on his TikTok. And the thing is that he posted it to start with. He knew that army will catch it and spread it. He knew!!! And he wanted us to. I don't know how to articulate this properly to make my point clearly, but the whole thing screams Queer coding to me. I talked about it in a previous post, and I stand by my words.

This wasn't about doing something silly and then regretting and deleting. This was about posting something with a message, and then deleting because it couldn't stay up on his account ("as long as it's not on my tiktok"), but relying on army to catch it and spread it around.

"Let's talk in English", reading out a comment...

The Nah, though, lol.

"English is so difficult", he says in English, lol.

Talks about how the comments are slow and the responses in Stationhead were immediate, and then, out of nowhere he's going...

Puiriri...

Well, he actually does this during Like crazy as well.

Nope, not JM on the brain what so ever...

"Korean is sexy"...him going with that's right, Korean is the hardest language... He actually talks about how the translations from English to Korean differ from translator to translator and how interesting that is. True about the opposite way as well, seeing the difference in the structures of both languages.

"You want to see me laugh?"

Funny, the original translations were "smile if you're real". Either way, he's hilarious.

I can't with him. LMAO.

Prepares drink no. 2.

Again, this man doesn't want to be called cute, but he's so damn cute, lol. Like how can you be preparing this alcoholic drink and still be so cute about it? Lol.

No tequila or champagne for JK.

"You want to have a drink with me?"

JK: You already all know it.

Why does it feel like JK is talking about so much more than just knowing his address is up on YT?

"You want me to call out my address? But you really can't visit me." Boundaries set once again. With a smile. But set none the less.

Plays a song he tells us he was recommended by one of the dancers while filming 3D MV. 21 by Gracie Abrams.

Says we'll be like this today "let's rest". How you can call what he does later as rest I have no idea, lol.

He shows us where he shot the TikTok clips, the corridor. Shows and explains a little how he does it.

Does a little clean up sesh in the kitchen. The way he was rearranging the bottles and utensils, while on live, was that intentional? Was it just his neuro divergency, getting distracted perhaps? Idk.

Asked if he ate, asks "what will I eat?" in English and tries to say something else or thinks maybe he didn't say it properly initially, but gives up, lol.

Then someone askes to hear Hobi's song. And JK is happy to go put on Jhope's song, saying he misses him. 😭

Says "Arson", twice, but then plays "More", lol.

Ok, so this is where we start with listening to the members songs, and I do have something to say about this.

JK plays 2 of Hobi's songs, and puts on a show.

If this is JK resting... Lol.

Sure he's tired...

After Hobi, JK plays Tae's Slow dancing.

Then stops the song, sits down saying how tiring have to rest and then says "Let's go with all the major songs for the members".

And guess who's next... one guess allowed... Of course you know the answer to that.

He has Like crazy playing twice in a row and then SMF pt. 2. He really LOVES SMF pt. 2. You can tell it means A LOT to him. Not that LC doesn't, but I feel that emotionally LC is harder for him, while SMF pt. 2 is cathartic (for JM and as such so meaningful to him as well).

He's all playful with LC.

We have this as well...

And at some point wants to do something, walks off camera looking for a prop, I guess, only to come back deciding it's a no go - won't be fun (me sitting here dying to know what he was up to).

The whole bottle empty during LC.

He moves on to Jin, 1 and a half songs, RM (3 songs) and Suga (2 songs).

Point being, the only member that gets only 1 song played is Tae. Ouch. The only member to have the same song played twice - JM.

So, let's talk a second about the whole Like crazy playing twice. Cause Idk if you get it. He listens to Hobi and then Tae's Slow dancing, then says "we have to listen to all the members", cause he ain't falling into the TKK trap, and he plays JM. Cause, of course it would be JM. But here's the thing. Each one of them was on a specific playlist. When he played a song it continued to the next song in line. Hobi he said Arson, but actually played More (which was interesting within itself), and then it went to On the streets. RM same, went down through his album, Suga the same. But not JM. He played Like crazy, and then following it, him not moving from his chair or changing the songs or going to play it again, it played it again. Same version. In the album Like crazy is followed by SMF pt. 2 (which did follow the second time LC played, and he did listen through that too). So my question is what kind of playlist JK has for JM? Does he just have these songs going on repeat? He gets up to stop it just at the end of SMF pt. 2, and I can't help but wonder what the next song would have been? SMF pt. 2 again maybe?

Of course he still remembers the choreo.

He talks about Jin and Super Tuna, how he's wild and that side of him is why the team is so bright. He really loves him so, and misses him.

"I miss my members".

Prepares drink no. 3.

The whole ceremony around the drink preparations... he's so funny.

He makes a comment about Jin's MV while looking towards where his whole music playing set up is. So, this is YT he's playing from? Which means these would be YT playlists? Which means he watches LC on repeat? I mean, who could blame him really?

Gets up to change the playlist to RM's songs.

While Flowerworks is playing he reads a comment and says:

"Did Mingyu cut his hair?"

Now, we know they saw each other later that night, getting together with others as well, but JK once again draws the lines here. He's a good friend definitley. Someone he hangs out with, of course. But knowing if he cut his hair... meaning being in constant contact with him or more than that, as there are some that might think... nope.

Ok, time to get serious.

He starts to talk about the members songs, their "colours are so different", and then he's asked after resuming activities in 2025 what he wants all the members to do together? Turns down the music a bit to get serious:

Make an album, quickly come out to see army, first priority of course. From the moment they get back together to find the way to come out as quickly as possible. "We will do Bon voyage...we will do In the soop..."

Stops, gets up to turn down the volume even more, and this is when you know he's delving even deeper, and getting even more serious. Sits down and continues...

Ok, I'm really not sure this is about the solo activities. He talks about that further on. I thought this when I first heard this during the live, and although the wording is slightly different I still think this is JK is sending us a message. They love us, they love each other. They will be coming back and they will be giving it their all. But that said, they will also have their own personal lives. Setting the stage, perhaps? For relationship announcements? Marriages on the way? He told us that he wants to make us happy, but to do so we have to understand that he deserves happiness as well. Is this one step further in that direction? yes their focus is on army, but with all of that they will also have their own personal paths.

He continues about them wanting to "look awesome" in front of us, or want to give us strength,

He knows what his top priority is, and he hopes we know that we are the reason. For real.

He continues to talk about coming back in 2025, releasing a song, saying it will be approx. 2 years.

They mustn't forget there are those rooting for BTS. Train, release an album, tour.

They will have to meet army around the world.

This is interesting:

They will reveal by doing shootings and "let your ears get pleased and let you watch our shows". Stories

"BTS is this kind of team". That is what they will show.

And what members each want to do, they can do that later. Him making clear that their first priority is the comeback as BTS.

Number one priority is about the group, and he makes sure we understand that this is not only him speaking but also true for every single one of them.

Again, army's importance to him. This isn't acting or being false or fake, this is genuinely what he feels. When said in a comment that army are because of BTS he corrects them, sets things straight: BTS are here because of army!!

And then this happens:

"Jeon Jimin?" he reads out a comment.

Now, I understand people think it's disrespectful because of the meaning it has in the West but the fact that in Korea people don't change their names after marriage. Thing is, Karmy nor JK, for that matter, really find it offensive? He doesn't even take it that way. To him it's someone putting their two names together, I'd say just like Jikook or minkook or kookmin. Nothing more nothing less. And he chooses to read it out. He could have just left it, but he decided to read the comment out.

This is when he remembers he has to play Suga's songs too, lol. Playing Haegeum.

"How can all the member have such different tastes in music? Isn't that fascinating?"

I love it that he feels that way. I love it that he knows how talented he is (especially knowing how he runs himself down intellectually). I love that he knows and appreciates the rest of the members talent as well. They are all different, and yet all outstanding each in their own way.

And not only does he see that in them, he also attributes his own growth as a person to them.

JK tells us how Yoongi told him off for not doing the Haegeum dance challenge, repeats it a couple of times too, how he was upset about it, lol. So he says he will do it. A little late, no? And he makes sure to make it clear that it won't be soon either. But it will go up on his TikTok.

Toilet break time.

Comes back, finishes up his drink and stops Amygdala to play Seven and 3D before he ends his live.

So, he chooses the explicit version of Seven. Sings along. Admits he's a little drunk and for now will stop drinking. Emphasis on "for now", lol.

Now, while he's playing Seven someone asks for him to play Slow dancing.

Once is enough, thank you very much!! Lmao. He just keeps shutting them down. It's also the way he says it, the intonation. Sound annoyed, lol.

Says he'll play 3D and say his goodbyes, which he does. Sings along to 3D as well, ad-libbing at the end, kind of wondering if this is something we will be getting in his live performances. It does feel like he chooses to sing certain lyrics while not others, in both Seven and 3D.

Then he says his goodbyes, to look forward to the album, to know that he is always thinking of us, to have a wonderful night and day and thanks us again .

So that's it. JK's live. Missed these lives of his, as exhausting as writing these posts are, lol. This is Jungkook. Cute and funny and serious and sincere.

[tonberry-yoda]

Memories - Kento Nanami

notes - I said I wanted to write a nanami fic, and here I am!!! I hope my nanami simps enjoy because if I'm being honest, this is one of my favorite pieces ever. I wrote this listening to Minecraft music lol <3 word count - 880 summary - you're tired. it's cold. but you can't seem to sleep. you decide to go out for a late night walk with a little too much on your mind.

~~BUY ME A KO-FI (COMMISIONS ARE OPEN)~~

Night time in Tokyo was pretty, but you needed to get away for a while. Away from the city. Not too far, but not too close either.

Despite the snow outside, you slipped on a jacket and went outside. You definitely weren't wearing the right shoes, but what did it matter. You honestly didn't mind the cold and it wasn't snowing too heavily to your surprise, just light dusting over the sidewalk.

You looked up and hummed lightly at the snow falling towards you that looked somehow brighter even though it was the dead of night. It helped that there were dim orange streetlamps everywhere.

You sighed and began a short walk to free your mind a bit.

So much had happened to you in such a short amount of time and you rarely got time to think it over.

But nights like these weren't always nice. They usually came from a lack of sleep and deep thoughts.

Your room was too cold, your fan was too loud, and your brain wouldn't calm down.

You watched every step you made carefully - making sure not to find any patches of ice that could cause you to slip and fall - and you played soft music in your headphones to accompany you.

You had lost more friends than you would've liked. It all happened so fast. You knew it came with the job, but in high school, when you were poor and hungry, what else could you do? Especially with that curse that accompanied you for your entire life. It wasn't anything bad, and it always was on its best behavior, it was just annoying that you had to grow up feeling so distant.

You had no choice but to become a sorcerer and that was okay. But it was also hard. And tiring. And it hurt.

You found a bench just outside of the city. You didn't mind that it was dusted with snow, you just took a seat, watching the lights glimmer from all of the buildings.

Where did you go wrong?

You balled your hair into your fingers and took a breath. Not often did you get to just breathe.

When was the last time you saw Gojo? Or Geto? Or anyone else for that matter?

You were so taken from the world that you weren't sure if a world existed anymore.

You felt yourself tearing up, but tried blinking it back and just watched the snow from above you.

Across from the bench you were on was a park. It was definitely old, but still used daily, you could tell.

You laughed at yourself when you had a thought: go sit on the swingset.

The laughter didn't stop you, so you did.

You used to go there when you were really young. Like really young. You don't even remember being that small. Or being a child.

You swung back and forth, just listening to the creaking of the metal on metal, but quickly stopped when you heard footsteps.

On the sidewalk you were just walking a moment ago, there was a familiar figure with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. He almost smiled when he saw you, blowing smoke out from his nose.

"Nanami?" you whispered.

He walked to the swingset and leaned on the metal bar of it just feet away from you.

"Aren't you cold?" he asked.

"Not really." You looked away from him and back up at the night sky, watching every piece of snow fall from the clouds above.

"Been a while."

You just nodded and began swinging again.

"You look tired." he said.

"So do you."

He just hummed in response and put his cigarette out on the metal of the bar before walking to a nearby trashcan to toss it.

He then walked to the swing next to you. "This seat taken?" he asked.

"Go for it." you said.

He sat down on the swing after wiping the snow off with his sleeve.

For a while, it was just silence; the sound of you swinging and the slight breeze that would occasionally blow.

"Did you know I would be here?" you finally asked, slowing down a bit.

"No, honestly. I was just going on a walk."

"In deep thought?"

He chuckled. "Something like that."

You smiled and looked down at your feet. "I miss you."

"Me too."

"Then why did you leave?"

"You left too." He turned to look at you with sweetness in your eyes.

"I know. And I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too." Nanami reached out his hand to you and you took it, standing up.

He brought your knuckles to his lips and he pulled you closer.

"Might be a while before something like this." He stood up from his swing and wrapped his arms around you. He smelled good. Really good. Like cologne and fresh laundry.

You smiled and wrapped your arms around him. He was also warm, making you - an ice cube at this point - nearly melt.

He pulled away from the hug and leaned down to you. "I know it's been a while," he whispered. "But I would like a kiss."

You pressed your lips to his and he hugged around your waist tightly.

The walk home was lonely, but the memories were nice to dwell on.

~~~~~

jjk masterlist | pinned post

2023 @tonberry-yoda – do not repost or claim ANY of my work as your own! likes, reblogs, and comments are not only welcome, but appreciated

~~~~~

[darkstar225]

Twice's 10th member helps her dear Tzuyu unnie with a nightmare

A/N: Heyyy, I'm trying to make up for the time I'm gone lol! Sry for taking so long to post :D I hope that the anon who gave me this idea on Tumblr likes it!

The request: hi unnie, can i have a request that Tzuyu had a bad dream about the Twice 10th member dead. So Tzuyu rush to the 10th member and cried out. But the member didnt listen to her. Later at the night the 10th member wants to go out but Tzuyu didnt let her

PS: Tysm for everyone who reads what I write, I hope I can bring a smile to your faces every time I post! I'd like to thank whoever sent me this idea 'cause I loved to write it <3

__________________________________________________________

The moon cast a gentle glow over the city, the night air hanging still and silent. Tzuyu, the second youngest member of TWICE, stirred restlessly in her sleep. She found herself trapped in the clutches of a haunting dream, a nightmare that refused to let go. In the depths of her subconscious, she saw Y/N, the 10th and youngest member of the group, lifeless and cold.

A gasp escaped Tzuyu's lips as she jolted awake, beads of sweat clinging to her forehead. Her heart pounded in her chest, the residual fear of the dream lingering in her mind. She reached for her phone, the digital clock glaring 3:00 AM. Her fingers trembled as she dialled Y/N's number, urgency colouring her actions.

The phone rang several times before a groggy voice answered on the other end. 

Y/N - Hello?

Tzuyu - Y/N! Are you okay?

Tzuyu's voice trembled with a mix of fear and desperation.

Y/N, still half-asleep, mumbled a response. 

Y/N - Tzuyu unnie? What's wrong? It's so late.

Tzuyu took a shaky breath, trying to steady her voice. 

Tzuyu - I had a nightmare about you. A terrible one. I need to see you, please.

There was a pause on the other end, then a soft sigh. 

Y/N - Alright, give me a few minutes unnie.

Tzuyu hung up the phone and paced nervously around her room. The remnants of the nightmare clung to her like a persistent shadow. She couldn't shake the image of her little sister's lifeless form, and the fear gnawed at her insides.

Minutes later, a knock echoed through Tzuyu's door. Y/N stood there, rubbing her eyes, her expression a mix of concern and sleepiness. 

Y/N - Sis, what's going on?

Tzuyu's eyes were wide and teary as she pulled Y/N into a tight hug, almost desperate in her need for reassurance. 

Tzuyu - I dreamt that you... that you were gone. It was so real, Y/N.

Y/N's eyes softened, understanding dawning on her. She ran a soothing hand through Tzuyu's hair. 

Y/N - It's just a dream, unnie. I'm right here, alive and well.

Tzuyu pulled back, her eyes searching Y/N's face for any sign of the nightmare. 

Tzuyu - I know it's just a dream, but it felt so real. I couldn't shake the fear. *frowns*

Y/N - Sometimes dreams are just our minds playing tricks on us. I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere. Okay? *smiles gently*

Tzuyu nodded, her shoulders sagging with relief. 

Tzuyu - Thank you for coming. I needed to see you.

Y/N yawned, the late hour finally catching up with her. 

Y/N - Can we talk more in the morning, though? I'm really tired, and you should get some rest too.

Tzuyu hesitated but nodded. 

Tzuyu - Yeah, of course. Sorry for waking you up.

Y/N waved it off with a smile. 

Y/N - It's okay. We may not share the same blood but we're sisters, right? Now go get some sleep, and we can talk more in the morning.

As the first light of dawn began to filter through the curtains, Tzuyu found herself unable to shake the unease that clung to her. The nightmare still lingered, a dark cloud over her thoughts. She watched as Y/N slept peacefully, blissfully unaware of the turmoil in her older sister's mind.

Later that day, the members of TWICE gathered for their schedule. Tzuyu couldn't shake the feeling of dread that loomed over her, the nightmare still haunting her thoughts. As the day wore on, she couldn't concentrate on anything, her mind constantly drifting back to the vivid images from the dream.

As evening approached, Y/N noticed Tzuyu's distracted demeanour. Concern etched her features as she approached her unnie. 

Y/N - Sis, is everything okay? You seem off today.

Tzuyu bit her lip, debating whether to share the details of the nightmare. In the end, she took a deep breath and decided to confide in Y/N. 

Tzuyu - As I mentioned, I had a bad dream last night, about you. But it felt so real, and I can't shake the fear that I felt.

Y/N's eyes widened, her concern deepening. 

Y/N - What exactly happened in the dream?

Tzuyu hesitated before recounting the details, the chill of the nightmare seeping into her words. Y/N listened intently, her expression growing sombre as she absorbed the weight of Tzuyu's fear.

Y/N - Wow. That sounds really intense. I'm sorry you had to go through that.

Y/N finally whispered after Tzuyu finished talking. 

Tzuyu nodded, a heaviness in her chest lifting as she shared the burden with Y/N. 

Tzuyu - I know it was just a dream, but it felt so real, and I can't shake the fear of losing you.

Y/N reached out, squeezing Tzuyu's hand reassuringly. 

Y/N - I'm right here, Tzuyu unnie. I'm not going anywhere. Dreams can be scary, but they're not real. We're family, and I'm here for you.

As the evening wore on, Tzuyu's anxiety began to ease. Y/N's words were a salve to her troubled mind, and the bond between the two sisters strengthened. However, as night fell once again, a new wave of unease settled over Tzuyu. The nightmare still lingered in the recesses of her mind, and she couldn't shake the feeling that something bad was about to happen.

In the quiet of the night, Y/N stirred from her sleep. The moon bathed the room in a soft glow as she sat up, sensing Tzuyu's restlessness. 

Y/N - Sis, are you okay? *whispers as she reaches out to shake Tzuyu gently*

Tzuyu blinked, her eyes wide with fear. 

Tzuyu - Y/N, I can't shake this feeling that something bad is going to happen. Please, promise me you'll be careful.

Y/N frowned, concern etching her features. 

Y/N - Tzuyu, it's just a feeling. You can't let a dream control your emotions. I promise I'll be careful, okay? But you need to get some rest.

Tzuyu nodded reluctantly, the fear still lingering in her eyes. 

Tzuyu - I just can't shake this feeling of dread.

Y/N sighed, pulling Tzuyu into a comforting embrace. 

Y/N - I understand that you're worried, but you can't let fear control you. I'm here, and I'll be careful. Now, let's get some rest. Tomorrow is a new day.

As Y/N held her sister close, Tzuyu felt the warmth of the embrace soothing the lingering fears. The bond between the two sisters was unbreakable, and as they drifted back to sleep, the moon watched over them, casting a protective light over the shared dreams of the night.

And this made them share one thought:

I love my dear chosen family.

A/N: I'm sorry for any errors. English is not my first language. Pls, let me know if there is something wrong, ty for reading <3

[tunastime]

TUNA TUNA TUNA TUNA TUN- *trips and falls on my face*

That docsuma fic huh HUH , I absolutely LOVED it you don't even know how hungry I am for those two interacting, especially in dbhc au

You just kinda know when to post these I guess since I've been thinking about dbhc docsuma lately and this fic saved me

and just to put it into perspective, I am a person who prefers oneshots drabbles stuff like that, you know short stuff, whenever it's a longer fic I need to take breaks y' know but you have accomplished something that almost no one could because you made me read the whole +3000 words fic in one sitting and then I even re-read it which I NEVER do, so that's how good your writing is I guess wow....- there aren't many authors who can put such realistic images in my head when I read something

also props for writing sleep deprived/exhausted Xisuma so realistically - It's a popular thing in xisuma-centric fics but DAMN you definetely know how to write it properly, in a way that really makes me enjoy the fic. I like how you portrayed that feeling of when you, like, flow from sleep to concious state when you're tired it's just MMMMMM (need to add that descriptions of Doc's feelings are really sweet he's such a silly guy he's so confused <3 also how much he cares for X is so cute <333)

^ this sleepy derp invaded my computer today so I'm handing him back to you

Sorry for the long ramble! Just needed to tell you how much I enjoyed reading it, it made my day for sure!

PICKS YOU UP AND PUTS YOU BACK ON YOUR FEET. GRABS YOUR SHOULDERS. MAY MAY MAY MAY I'm going to explode into one billion small pieces!!!!!

FIRST OF ALL. XISUMA. XISUMA IN MY ASK BOX? HE IS SO PRECIOUS TO ME?? ;.; ohh the way he looks so so tired and comfortable, and the lighting is so soft, I adore him so much.

gimme a second I need to lie down. brother, I am CRAZY about them on such a fundamental level brother it is NOT OKAY. I'm not okay. I needed to post this as soon as possible so people knew that KJSHDFJKDSHF

but also, WAUGH?? WAU!! I'm so so honored... I'm always a multiple sitting reading girlie because I get either so so sucked in and NEED to stop myself, or I'm reading at such an inopportune time LOL. BUT THAT IS SO SWEET. AUGH. I'm so so glad when I get something across (like sleepy xisuma, or the half-consciousness, or xisuma all stiff and in pain, or the sleepy affection). and writing Doc like this has been sooooo fun.

Doc really is trying hard to grapple with something he doesn't quite understand or can't compartmentalize, and I spent a good and fair amount of time talking with shep about how xisuma and him might be interacting without the helmet on, what emotions might come into play, and how they might both navigate that situation. I like to joke that nobody understand xisuma/docsuma like I do but that absolutely cannot be true LMAOO I'm just crazy about him/them for no reason

auwawugh. sniffling really pathetically. I need to go lie down I think <3

[trashyvanillabean]

♡ 𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐌𝐔𝐓𝐔𝐀𝐋𝐒. ♡ Tag 10 followers you’d like to get to know better

TAGGED BY @azaracyy

TAGGING. @artheresy @pinkrose05 @mochinoodle @manofmanymons @dragonciphering @iwasthewind @narzissenkreuz-ordo @alchemiclee @enigmaticmaki I'M TAGGING ALL OF Y'ALL HAHAHAAAAAAAAA!!!!! 😈

✧. ┊ 𝑵𝑨𝑴𝑬 : Vanille!! (Not my real name obviously.) Though I've had people (not on here) just call me Vanilla.

✧. ┊ 𝑨𝑳𝑰𝑨𝑺 : Also Vanille. Vanilla works, too!

✧. ┊ 𝑮𝑬𝑵𝑫𝑬𝑹 : Female, but I otherwise don't really care for pronouns (currently).

✧. ┊ 𝑺𝑻𝑨𝑹 𝑺𝑰𝑮𝑵 : Taurus

✧. ┊ 𝑯𝑬𝑰𝑮𝑯𝑻 : around 5 feet aaaand maybe 4 to 5 inches...?

✧. ┊ 𝑺𝑬𝑿𝑼𝑨𝑳𝑰𝑻𝒀 : VIDEO GAME CHARACTERS /joking. I've never really had the chance to explore; but even when I've had a few guys flirting with me even before college, it was just never mutual. So, probably somewhere on the acespec...?

✧. ┊ 𝑨𝑽𝑬𝑹𝑨𝑮𝑬 𝑯𝑶𝑼𝑹𝑺 𝑶𝑭 𝑺𝑳𝑬𝑬𝑷 : Sleep is either almost nonexistent and only visits me for about a few hours (around 3 hours), or it's a tyrant that keeps me locked in my bed for way more than half of the day (around 8 hours or 9).

✧. ┊ 𝑫𝑶𝑮 𝑶𝑹 𝑪𝑨𝑻 𝑷𝑬𝑹𝑺𝑶𝑵 : i love watching videos of cats and dogs, but I've never had either, and it's often a hit or miss with cats (when it comes to them liking my presence, I mean; a few of the neighborhood cats are totally chill with me, but most seem to find me lukewarm 🥲). Dogs are...well, I'm a little uneasy around them, to be honest (especially if they're big dogs).

✧. ┊ 𝑩𝑳𝑨𝑵𝑲𝑬𝑻 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑺𝑳𝑬𝑬𝑷 𝑾𝑰𝑻𝑯 : Because my fam likes to fiddle with the thermostat, I always have at least two blankets. 🥶 Both of them are heavy, very fuzzy and have floral designs.

✧. ┊ 𝑫𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑴 𝑻𝑹𝑰𝑷 : I have a few places in mind, like Canada, Thailand, and maybe Norway. (Obviously these are just dream trips. Not a big fan of flights.)

✧. ┊ 𝑩𝑳𝑶𝑮 𝑩𝑰𝑹𝑻𝑯𝑫𝑨𝑻𝑬 : 14 August 2023. I've actually hopped around before, but anonymously without a blog. I was pretty shy (and I still am) and so long as the anonymous option was available, I never saw the need to make a blog. (And then Tumblr began requiring users to have accounts if they wanted to mingle anonymously. 🥲)

✧. ┊ 𝑾𝑯𝒀 𝑰 𝑴𝑨𝑫𝑬 𝑨 𝑻𝑼𝑴𝑩𝑳𝑹 𝑩𝑳𝑶𝑮 : I just wanted my own corner to be shamelessly nerdy and have fun while escaping irl, and I'm admittedly tired of having to bookmark so many things on my browser to go back and dig through if I want to go back and enjoy them again (especially because some of the works I find can have accounts that spontaneously disappear).

✧. ┊ 𝑼𝑹𝑳 𝑴𝑬𝑨𝑵𝑰𝑵𝑮 : Exactly what it says!! I've been called "Plain Jane" (no, Jane isn't my real name either, lol) and variations of "plain/basic vanilla" (which is strange if you've already seen that post about vanilla and saffron) and I'm normally a shy and quiet "bean" irl; but I have my own moments of being a degenerate, mostly in private, hence the "trashy" part. 😅

[genderqueerpositivity]

Why do meds never affect me in the ways I've been warned they will lol.

I was told to expect Strattera to make me nauseous, and to eat something light when I take it. Was also told to take it right after waking up because I won't be able to sleep if I take it before bed. And I was told that I wouldn't really be able to tell if it's working for 3-4 weeks minimum.

It's been less than a week. So far, zero nausea whether I take on an empty stomach or after eating 4 tacos. Less than an hour after taking it, I'll be looking for things to do to keep myself awake. Not because I am tired, but because it feels like everything is moving so fucking slowly.

It's almost like...understimulation, but without the usual frustration and irritation that typically comes along with that.

I'm used to a usual...stream of background sound inside my own head; almost as I had a radio in each room of the house, all on different stations, at different volumes. A constant low-key anxiety that feels like itching or buzzing under my skin. And a nearly compulsive need to move.

All gone.

My only real concern is how it's affecting me emotionally. It isn't a numbness (which I have experienced on other medications before), I definitely still feel my emotions. But it's different. Less intense. On one hand, I am not comfortable with this because it feels...unnatural for me.

But on the other, I have been embarrassed for so fucking long because I have so many issues identifying and controlling my emotions in the moment. Is turning them down a bit really a bad thing?

As far as improving executive functioning goes, I think it's too soon to tell if this will be as effective as the Adderall was in that department. It's too soon to tell if this is going to be a good thing for me in general, I think.

[flaminaroundlikeastar]

GN!Reader x Any Male!Autobot💕

Fandom : Transformers

Series : Any

Warning : SFW // family friendly, wholesome, some teasing, lil bit romantic <3

Note(s) : I chose autobots because I want a peaceful interaction and decepticons ain't about chit chat xD they straight up kidnapping you / Y/N LOL(Might make it into a fic who knows >//<)

°•◇°•◇°•◇°•◇°•◇°•◇°•◇°•◇°•◇°•◇°•◇°•

You were sitting in your room, reading an old novel until you heard a sudden, but gentle tap on your window. You moved your head to see who is it. " Hey Y/N! It's almost time for our trip " he announced. " What trip?  " you thought to yourself, but then it clicked and you remembered that you indeed planned a trip about a month ago. " Ohh, that trip! Of course I'm coming. " you said as you put your novel aside and went to take a shower and put on new clothes. He was very excitedly awaiting for you outside, but he tried to keep it cool.

You stepped outside and locked the doors. " I'm here. " you said calmly as he opened a door for you to sit down on the passenger's seat. " Great! " he said as he turned on the engine and semi-quiet music. He was indeed excited, but not too much of course. After all it was but a short trip.

It was 20:40 (40 min past 8 PM) as he was still driving across the city. After thinking for too long, you decided striking a conversation with him. " Do you ever get tired after long driving?" You asked curiously, to which he replied, jokingly a bit " Well, you don't need to drive yourself, I'm giving you that real 'passenger princess' treatment over here ~ " to which you laughed a bit. He wasn't wrong there though. It's a big difference between being a driver and a passenger. After an hour or so of small talk, you decided to star gaze as it was dark enough to see the stars. After a long pause, he asked curiously " I noticed you like staring at stars a lot, is there a particular reason? " To which you responded with " Stars are beautiful, there's a vast amount of them, which allows me to relax a bit from real life worries. " you said with a faint, but a warm smile. " You know what's even more beautiful than that? Your adorable spaced out face when you stargaze ~ " he teased you a bit. " Stop it, you lil goofball " you said giggling a bit. " What? It's the truth, honey, your eyes are shiny like stars ~ ". That completely swept you away. You were blushing a lot, but tried hard not to make it obvious. He knew anyways. Teasing you, even in small amounts was always his favourite hobby.

It was 01:00 ( 1 AM ) and ironically you were getting sleepy. Normally you're a night owl, but for some reason you really felt like sleeping. After a short pause you asked him to stop so you could go into the back row to sleep in full body. There was a small pillow and a blanket, because he's fully aware of you feeling sleepy during night time trips. You absolutely wrapped yourself in that blanket and slowly drifted into a sleep state. The white noise and slight rocketing really gets you everytime.This was his favorite part of trip, as he really enjoys seeing you all wrapped up and adorable, like a napping cat.

By 07:00 (7 AM) he has already arrived home for about an hour or two now. He didn't wake you up though, just allowed you to rest a bit. After a while you opened your eyes. " Hey, good morning, how was your sleep? " he asked enthusiastically. " Good " you sit down to stretch a bit. " You look darn adorable when you sleep. Especially when you hide half of your face into blanket ~ " he teased you again. " Heyy, stop it, you silly " you said blushing a lot and being defensive about it. " How is that even adorable? " you asked out of curiosity. " You look like a cat napping, all cute, warm and vulnerable, heh, it's sure a view to admire ~ " he replied with a cheeky smile, well, at least you assumed that based on his tone, because he was still in his alt mode. " We should definitely do more trips heh. " he said enthusiastically as he let you outside, for you to head home.You two are definitely not forgetting it any time soon <3.

[gurugirl]

Guruuuuuuuuu it's meeeeeee 🍸 Tomorrow is the weekend and my brother is coming to town to visit and he wants me to entertain him but I'm exhausted so wish me luck! And I've been meaning to stop in and say hi but I've been so busy since I was promoted at my firm. Just everything has been a big whirlwind. But I love it.

Update ~ My ex (the one who I kept sleeping with after he broke up with me) is seeing someone else now! It's so funny too because the last time he tried to hook up with me apparently he was dating her and I almost gave him and invited him over too. I'm so glad I was too tired because when I found out he'd been seeing this chick (who I know by the way but that's a different story) I was like doing the timeline in my head and yeah... it's very possible I slept with him while they were dating but as far as I know they're not exclusive but for me that's an ick. I'm not casual like that. So I had to go get STD tested and that's when I decided to block him completely. I am a well educated, grown adult who is on her way to some very successful career and saving up to buy a house (on track for end of year) and I'm fucking around with some loser asshole still? So yeah... that's all in the past and I know last time I said it was over with us but this time it's for real 😅

How have you been?? How's school and Mexico and your adorable dog?

Also I just read the ex's dad Harry last night and I'm absolutely hooked already. I don't make it on tumblr often anymore unless I need to shut my brain off after a grueling day at work but for this one? Honey let me tell you how well written and absolutely gripping it is and it's only part 1. No one does that tension like you and this one is no different. So I'm just here to tell you that I will be reading this series and opening up Tumblr every week for this one because it's so good already. Not one paragraph was boring or out of place. That's such a pet peeve of mine when I'm really into a good story and there's a chunk that absolutely does nothing to move the plot forward or it's just for funsies but that takes me right out of the experience of reading when a writer starts to add too much just for bulk.

tootles! -🍸

OH MY GOSH! I've been wondering how you've been! Congrats on the promotion attorney girl!! Amazing! You are such an inspo! 🎉 Busy is good when you're doing something you love! And I hope you have an amazing time with your brother. How nice that he's coming to visit! I miss my brother like you can't even imagine so it's making me all teary eyed just thinking about it.

And I'm so glad you are officially done with the ex. What a weirdo trying to sleep with you while he was seeing someone else. LOL. Men just aren't always the smartest but you were right to get tested because you never know. Smart girl!

And things are good here! The weather is warming up so midday is quite warm! School is good! I took an accelerated communications class and just finished that one (8 week condensed class) and now I'm just waiting on grades to be posted and still have another class I'm taking currently but I think spring break is soon? Also my dog is so fun. He's kind of showing his age these days but he gets 3 good walks every day so he's not just relegated to using the bathroom in our backyard. The walks help with his mind and his body and it puts him in a good mood (me too lol). He has pups he likes to play with up the street but that wears him out and he limps back home after he plays with them because his hips are sort of aging so he usually winds up resting for hours after 20 minutes of playtime. Anyway I could go on about Barry... he's the love of my life (don't tell my SO lol).

So happy to hear your thoughts on ex-boyfriend's dad! Thank you hon! I'm so flattered 🥰 Love that you enjoyed it!!

xoxo

[sidekick-hero]

15 questions, 15 tags

i was tagged by the lovely @hammity-hammer thank you darling! <33 It was SO interesting to read your answers and getting to know you better. I don't have a piercing yet but I would def get one at your shop, if you ever open one!! <3

Gonna put this under a read more so I don't clutter anyone's dash :)

1. Are you named after anyone? Not really. My mom was watching a lot of American movies when she had been pregnant with me, looking for a name and that one came up in the credits. To be fair, she wanted to give me a different name but my father vetoed that one, so my name is their compromise.

2. When was the last time you cried? Depends a bit on how we define crying. Work has been really hard the last few months and I did not get a lot of sleep and I was really exhausted. So, when 2 weeks ago my boss called me after I worked 8 hours already to tell me she had some issues with a text I wrote and then we talked this through for almost 3h and then I realized I would need to rewrite the whole text that same night I had tears spring to my eyes. In front of my boss (video call). Not my best moment. But real crying? No idea, actually. I don't cry a lot tbh.

3. Do you have kids? Nope, and I also don't want them. Never have. I like my friend's kids and being the cool auntie, but that's it.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot? the more tired I am, the more sarcastic I get. I try to tone it down usually because while it can be amusing at times it's also kind of a negative kind of humour and a downer if you use it too much. Also very easy to hurt people with it.

5. What's the first thing you notice about people? Varies a lot. Their general appearance I guess, like height, figure, hair. It's not like I single out a certain feature. And from there it depends on the context, the person, my mood etc.

6. What's your eye color? Hard to describe. It's green, but not like grass. More a faded kind of green, grey-green but with specks of brown when you get really close.

7. Scary movies or happy endings? there are scary movies with happy endings ;) But yeah, as a kid/teenager I was a sucker for horror movies, I watched them all. Then I moved out and started living alone. Horror movies lost their charm then so now I have to go with happy endings. Life sucks enough as it is, give me some escapism.

8. Any special talents? At parties I always impressed people by being able to fit my whole fist into my mouth lol but I wouldn't say that's a special talent, just a flexible jaw. I'm very good with numbers, and patterns, and logic? I have a very analytical mind. Oh, and I'm a very good runner.

9. Where were you born? A very small town smack in the middle of nowhere in Germany. I played in cow dung as a kid.

10. What are your hobbies? Running, working out, taking long walks and hikes in the woods (yeah I'm one of these outdoorsy people you've been warned about). If getting tattooes counts as a hobby then tattooes lol.

11. Do you have any pets? My beloved dog Bella (the floof, as Jen would say). She's the light of my life. Huge ass snow white dog, cuddly as fuck at home, more of a Cujo outside. She has a very strong distrust of other people. She's bred for protection and takes this very serious.

12. What sports do you play/have you played? Outside of PE I never really "played" a sport. I run since I am 17, I train at the gym regularly, I go for really long walks (record is 60km in one go) and I did KravMaga for about 2 years. I want to start MMA but it's expensive as fuck.

13. How tall are you? A very average 5'7'' (170cm)

14. Favorite subject in school? Philosophy, history, politics as well as German and English (those two had been my advanced classes)

15. Dream job? I always wanted to become a profiler. I find serial killers and offenders endlessly fascinating. It speaks to the analytical part of me but also to my love for being active and to work with my body. So yeah, dream job. Sadly, it never worked out. But I love my current job, too :))

i'm gonna tag the last 15 people in my notes, as I tend to do ;) And as usual, please feel free to ignore this <3

@yournowheregirl, @baronsamediswife, @hedwigs-art, @aftershocked, @princess-josephina (hellooo new follower, nice to meet you!), @demonbitchesnearyou,@dogblogbog, @silentdescant, @kaspurrcat, @gooodtoast (love the URL lol), @supernaturalvikingwhore, @wastedonyoursmile, @legitcookie, @fearlessjones and @letmeplaytheliontoo

[saccharinecoffee]

Hey, just a question I've been wondering for a while, I'm currently trying to start working out (depression and stuff) and wanted to know if you ever went to a gym cuz I need some advice please, is it better for beginners to start going to the gym 2 or 3 Days a week when they're just starting? I was just struggling with deciding sorry for being annoying

Hi anon!! Don't worry you're not annoying, I'll do my best to help! :)

Just a quick disclaimer though, I am not a personal trainer or professional in the field, just someone who grew up with a very fitness-oriented family and am currently being followed by a personal trainer as well.

As for the frequency of the workouts, it depends on your energy levels. Three times a week for starters is great, then after you get used to it (after two weeks or a month, depending on your comfort) you can start upping it to 4 days a week, then 5.

Now, keep in mind that workouts don't have to be really long. At the moment I do 30 min workouts because I'm still a bit unfit at the moment (recovering from long-term illness will do that to you LOL) but a lot of people regardless of health concerns can do it as well. Much like the frequency, once you get the hang of it you can incorporate more exercises per day and extend your workout time from 30 to 45 minutes, for example.

The exercises you choose depend on your health goals. If you wanna lose weight, then a focus on aerobics/cardio can be a good way to go. I've been told if you're a little sleepy a quick cardio session can help boost your energy. This could include going on runs, using a treadmill, elliptical machine, zumba or dance classes, biking, etc.

If you wanna tone up and/or become strong then a good mix of muscle-developing exercises can really help. I feel like these are super important even if you don't care about the aesthetics, because the strength it gives you is priceless. You feel like you can walk more, move more, carry more things, use stairs easily, etc. You just become so much less tired and less sore. It's awesome.

As for the types of exercises, that really depends on whether or not you're gonna go to the gym or try your hand at home workouts. Regardless of the two, you can google for exercises at home (or search on youtube) and at the gym you could always ask them to help you with a workout plan. Where I live almost all gyms make workouts for their members for free, but idk about other countries 😔

Now, this may not be directly related to what you asked, but I gotta stress that a healthy diet is fundamental to your goals and I don't mean that just for the aesthetics of it. Eating well can genuinely change how you feel, and it can give you so much energy. And I'm not talking calories, I'm talking the quality of the food. No processed food, fried food, junk food, all that nasty stuff. I could suggest googling, but most "healthy" meal plans people suggest are disgusting and bland and kinda bordering on crimes against humanity LOOL if this is something that interests you just ask for more and I can give examples and recipes and stuff.

Exercise isn't the end-all-be-all, but it really can help with you feeling a bit brighter, a bit more capable, a bit stronger or even a bit more attractive. The self-satisfaction of being able to lift more and more, to run farther and farther, that shit is such an ego-boost. It feels really good and it motivates you to keep going. And of course, if you build it into your life (try to work out at around the same time every time) it becomes a habit and that in of itself helps with internal regulation. You even sorta start missing it if you have to miss a session. Habits and predictability in your daily schedule are really helpful when it comes to mental illness. So while exercise isn't a miracle cure, it can really really help, especially when you add good eating habits and a good sleeping schedule into the mix!

I hope this was all the help you needed but if you have extra questions just ask!

[bigkickguy]

Please feel free to judge me - I was working with the made up rule a character can only show up on the board once! Otherwise this board would be 30% Dante 30% Yusei and 30% Lee

out of this board I have put a lot of rotating time into some of these, and basically almost none for others? They all add up in my mind! I am just matching themes or min maxing with what I want for my favs in most of these In descending order of how much I think of them + some notes below:

Yusei x Kaito (5ds x Zexal) - i have thought about them for years, they were just my favs from each series! I have rewritten like 4 crossover stories for them in my mind and have been since i first watched zexal. I just think they should build robots in a garage together, the ultimate romance. They both try to do everything themselves so now they can battle it out over who gets to put more of the world on their shoulders (they still would not share lol)

Dante x Oersted (Devil May Cry x LiveALive) - this one is more recent but i like the idea of this a lot with post game Oersted! Dante is a character very connected to love as a theme, him meeting Oersted who is just sad and needs to know love can be good in his life? Yes. This is just thematic min-maxing and a lot of 'I can fix him'. I also think it would be hilarious if Oersted gets summoned or something and is just like tired and refuses to do evil shit again cause he's growing. Dante got called to get him out of there and is just like, 'uhh you ok dude?' and he becomes Oersted's wacky wahoo dream man.

Kaiji x Akagi (Kaiji x Akagi) - this is somehow in #3, but i also had like a solid year they were all I thought about. It's a grey area of crossover validity because they were in a side gag manga of all of fkmt works crossing over? I think it still counts! A lot of people are into this I don't need to go into detail.

Mob x Gai (mp100 x Buraiden Gai) - buraiden gai is short and fkmt writes people being dehumanized by big rich organizations really well. It was a take on how shit the private juvenile detention centers are and Gai gets falsely accused and then busts out of the Worst one. (Describing that cause I assume more people have watched mob than they've read that!) This is a min-maxing of love and positive vibes because I need good things to happen for Gai. He's also got a very unique thought process and I think him and Mob hanging out would be hilarious. Gai would just be like 'i can punch faster than light' and mob would be like 'oh wow that's cool! I'm psychic!' and levitate something and Gai would lose his shit on the spot.

Luna x Angela (Virtue's Last Reward x Library of Ruina) - I am very emo over both of them and they both deserve good things and to be respected as people and not treated like they're tools or disposable. I think Angela can be angry for Luna and Luna can be soft for Angela. This is mainly a thematic min-max though. I LOVE BOTH OF THEM AND I NEED BOTH OF THEM TO GET TRATED BETTER BY THE WORLDS THEY ARE IN!!! Ultimate for this chart, both 'I can fix her' and 'I can make her worse' at the same time!

Ike x Kalas (Fire Emblem x Baten Kaitos) - I thought about it once cause I just think about crossovers for fun to pass the time when I can't sleep sometimes now it hurts. I feel like this is just a side grade of Ike x Soren, they feel emotionally similar to me. Specifics are pretty different but that's the fun rotating part :)

Akane x Aiba (Zero Escape x Ai the Somnium Files) I'm not going to lie I needed to fill out this board originally, but now I've been cursed with the idea of them hanging out. I want them to be the protagonists of a crossover game so badly!! They could be the ultimate crazy energy team up!

...I am getting tired of typing these out and I have thought about them probably only once or twice past making this chart after this point. I assume no one will read this anyway :)

[izzy-b-hands]

Fish

Wanted cute Rizzy stuff, but also partially inspired by the legend on that one post who gave himself the nickname Fish in college, and then it got sad by the time I came back to this as a WIP weeks (EDIT 3/7/23, make that uhh a month or more lol) later so...yeah. Please heed the TW below. There is some cute and soft and sweet in here, but it's more bittersweet overall than I'd previously planned.

TW for emetophobia and the death of a child.

---

"Ed sent you?"

Izzy frowns. "Yes, Edward sent me. He said you needed an extra pair of hands, then spent about ten minutes joking about how I would be best because-"

"Izzy Hands," Roach finishes with a chuckle. "That is funny."

Izzy shrugs, but a smile almost makes its way to fruition.

"Great, I have four patients here in a two patient shack," Roach sighs. "Come on in."

Inside he has his two adult patients sharing the one cot, the colicky baby in the cradle, and the toddler-

Immediately throws up on Izzy's shoes.

"Hi," Izzy peers down to the toddler. "Bad night?"

Roach watches as the kid looks up, sniffles, and breaks into a wail.

His plan was to have Izzy keep an eye on the adults, but before he can say a word the toddler is scooped up and on Izzy's hip.

"I get it," Izzy sighs. "Feel any better?"

The kid smashes his face into Izzy's shoulder and whines. It's adorable and sad, considering how long the parents said the kid had been sick like that. Long enough to scare Roach and wonder how much he could actually do for him.

But for now, he's being comforted and that means just maybe he can finally get medicine down his throat.

"This is..." Roach frowns. "Fuck, they didn't tell me his name."

"What do they call you?" Izzy asks the kid, a hand rubbing his back. "Hm? Give us a name."

"Fish," the kid mutters.

"That..." Izzy hesitates, and Roach can tell he wants to say something about how that's probably not actually the kid's name.

"That's a nice name. Do you get to go out to the beach and see the crabs and fish?"

A nod as Fish lifts his head from Izzy's shoulder.

And vomits on him again.

"I am so sorry," Roach winces.

"Not the first time I've been covered in sick, mine or someone else's," Izzy sighs. "Won't be the last I'm sure. Just be grateful I don't sympathy puke like Ed."

"What?"

"He's never told you? He and Jack would get horribly sick after a week of drinking nothing but rum, and they set each other off every time they heard the other vomit," Izzy replies. "Then again..maybe don't tell him I told you that."

Roach nods. "Might lose another toe otherwise."

Izzy smirks, but there's fear in his eyes.

"Fish," Roach turns his attention to the toddler. "Can I give you something to make you feel better?"

"No."

"It'll help," Izzy coos. "Roach is a nice doctor, let him help you."

He's almost too much in shock to snag the bottle of unfortunately bitter medicine, as Izzy sits himself and Fish on a chair in the corner.

Fish wriggles not unlike a fish out of water, but Izzy keeps him on his lap.

"I know," he murmurs. "But once it's down, then you can lay down and sleep. I bet you're tired."

"NO!"

Izzy chuckles. "Yeah you are. But okay, what do you want to do after the medicine instead?"

That seems to take Fish by surprise. "...beach?"

"I bet your mum and dad would take you to walk on the beach after this," Izzy says. "For a little while at least."

Roach has a million questions. Clearly Izzy has been around kids before, enough to withstand the grossness and tantrums that came with them. But what was the source? Siblings? Did he have kids like Stede, hidden away somewhere? And with who?

But he shuffles them away and kneels in front of them, bottle and a spoon in hand. "I promise I'll give you some water right away after if you keep this down, okay?"

Fish nods, but a little hand grasps Izzy's thumb tight before he opens his mouth for the medicine.

They both wince as Fish closes his mouth around the spoon, lets Roach pull it out...

And promptly vomits it back onto Roach's face.

"Okay," Izzy says. "Second time is the charm, maybe."

Roach nods and breathes through his nose as he lifts up a corner of his apron to wipe the foul liquid off his face. "One more try."

"Can we put anything else with it?" Izzy asks. "Something to mask the flavour?"

"I don't have anything," Roach replies. "Or I would."

Izzy wraps an arm around Fish to keep him in place before pulling a small wrapped square out of his pocket. "Here. Chocolate, meant to be for Ed, but I'm sure Bonnet's already bought him some."

Roach shakes his head. "I...okay. Sure. Thank you."

The second go around they work like a well-oiled machine: Roach tips the medicine into Fish's mouth, Izzy gently tips Fish's head back with a finger to his chin, and when he bobs back down with tears in his eyes, Roach pops a sliver of the chocolate into Fish's mouth.

"Oh," Fish sniffles, then reaches for the rest of the chocolate.

"A little bit more," Roach hands over another sliver. "Don't want you eating it all if you can't keep it down."

He expects Izzy to ask to leave, patience finally exhausted, or at least to insist on helping with the adult patients instead.

But he walks Fish around the room in his arms, patting the toddler's back and talking about sea creatures in the softest tone.

"Sleeping?" Izzy whispers after a few hours.

Fish is out cold on his shoulder, drooling.

Roach nods. "Let me see everyone else out, then I'll help you with him."

The adult patients head out, sufficiently treated and supplied with additional medicines and instructions. A while later, the colicky baby's mum returns bearing an aunt happy to help them for the next few nights.

Then, it's just them and Fish.

"I'll put him on the cot," Roach whispers as he gently tries to pull Fish from Izzy's arms.

Fish wraps his arms around Izzy's neck in response.

"It's okay," Izzy coughs, a hand reaching up to carefully loosen Fish's grasp. "I've had worse nights."

Izzy winds up sitting up on the cot, with Fish snuggled against him.

Even if it wasn't adorable, Roach would be doing his best to keep awake in case Fish gets sick again, or if his parents should show up ready to try and take him back home.

But as it is, it's surprisingly cute, and Roach can't take his eyes off of them.

--

"Roach."

"Roach!"

Roach stirs and frowns at the sun streaming into the shack. "Shit."

"It's okay," Izzy says, standing beside the chair Roach is slumped in. "I mean...his parents came by."

"They did," Roach sighs and yawns. "Good."

Izzy frowns. "Roach. He passed a few hours after that. His parents seemed to know. They said their good byes and asked if we could cover the burial. I told them yes."

Roach looks over to the cot, and his heart breaks.

A motionless little body, wrapped in a sheet from the cot.

Fish.

"I should have tried something else," Roach says. "I knew that might not be enough-"

"His parents tell me," Izzy groans as he kneels by the chair. "He'd been sick like this for a good month. Sometimes there's only so much that can be done."

"I know-"

"And I know that you know," Izzy interrupts, a hand rubbing Roach's back. "But a reminder never hurts. You gave him a safe place to rest, medicine to try and help, and a treat he might not have had much of before."

Roach nods, leans forward, and drops his head into his hands. "It should get easier."

"It should. But it doesn't," Izzy sighs and stands again. "They marked a spot near the beach. So they'll know..."

Izzy's voice drops, then returns with a slight shake. "So they'll know where he is."

"Who did you hire, for..."

"I didn't," Izzy says. "Not the first person I've buried. Won't be the last."

He carries Fish as if he might break apart in his arms, following Izzy out of the shack and down towards the beach.

There, Fang and Ivan stand with shovels.

Izzy nods and takes both from them. "Help him get the little one ready."

"You did your best," Fang murmurs as he helps Roach sit on the grass and dirt of the little patch just before the beach. "And Fish knew it."

He nods. It's what he can manage. He hasn't lost a young patient in a long time.

He forgot how much it hurts.

"Izzy had us pick up some things from his parents," Ivan adds, setting a burlap sack down beside them. "Things they'd like with him."

Another blanket to wrap him in. Hand stitched, clearly a baby blanket. The name Elias stands out in black thread.

Fang cries with him while they wrap him up further.

A few soft toys, that Ivan tucks into the folds of the blanket with the gentlest touch.

The plush fish is what does it.

"I'm sorry," Roach whispers while Fang and Ivan lift Fish, rather, Elias, into a small wooden coffin.

"You don't have to be sorry," Ivan says as he sits back by Roach, watching Fang argue with Izzy over taking a turn digging. "Mate, you did more for that kid than probably half the doctors that have been through here in the month before us. Don't beat yourself up."

"He wanted to go to the beach," Roach says, as he realises tears are flowing down his face. "He didn't get to see the fish again like he wanted, and we told him if he took the medicine-"

"He's at the beach," Izzy hands the shovel over to Fang mid-argument, and heads over to Roach and Ivan. "See? As close as he can be without the tide taking him."

He doesn't know what to make of this Izzy, who lets vomit dry on his clothes without a second thought, makes up impromptu silly songs about fish and crabs and eels to make a kid smile, and who wraps an arm around Roach now.

But maybe it doesn't matter, for now at least.

He leans into Izzy, and takes his offered hand when they stand again.

"Take a walk," Ivan nods. "Both of you. Then, and I swear I mean this kindly-"

"A shower, bath, something," Izzy finishes. "We will before we come find everyone. Can you let Ed and Stede know..."

"We've got it," Fang calls. "Stop worrying!"

"You know they don't know how to do that," Ivan says, turning to Fang. "Especially Izzy. He worries about worrying."

Fang gives a knowing nod, and Roach lets Izzy lead him on down the sand.

Maybe they'll see some fish. He hopes so.