#It’s just pretty frustrating to me i dont know. Do what you want but be respectful with it
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#ok finally making a post about meds#I've not ever tried taking medication before. I was sorta raised with that classic 'dont rely on meds you have to learn to manage without'#I mean I was also raised with the idea that therapy is stupid unless you have 'real' trauma. and also like idk.#can't stay home from school unless your temp is over 100 or you're throwing up. etc. very suck it up mindset#so I was just really nervous to start. also of course worried about losing myself or whatever I know that's a silly fear but#it's also a common fear for a reason!!! anyways#so I finally was like 'I need to do something' when I realized I was so anxious I couldnt even get myself to go outside alone#like I just don't want to do ANYTHING alone to a detrimental effect. and it was butting into my ability to do my work...#for various reasons. but then ALSO adhd has been a constant issue with my work as well!#it is SO hard to write and draw on a weekly pace like I am without being able to focus#my whole life I've had these terrible nightmares constantly and I've always woken up constantly in the night#sleep has always been terrible so I've always dreaded going to bed.. ESPECIALLy because it didnt even make me less tired#it was more something that I just did because I had to.#but going to bed was always terrible. there have been times I was too scared to go to sleep for weeks on end...#I've been mitigating this for years of course. and recently I've been taking melatonin which has been helping too.#but I've also always struggled to get up. because I've always been EXTREMELY exhausted#but also anxious of what the day might bring... idk.#anyways it has all hit a point that I was like okay. I am doing as many coping mechanisms as I can. the psych said they were good too#but... it just has never been enough. it's never been enough to make me not tired it's never been enough to make me not scared#so I finally talked to the doc about it. and she was like youve def got smth wrong basically. which yah I know.. but yknow#anyways so I started taking wellbutrin. and I am so frustrated now. because it's WORKING#that constant looming sense of dread is gone. I'm excited to get up. I'm excited to go to bed BECAUSE I'm excited to get up#I feel like for years I've been holding on to the idea that I have to get up because I have to put something good out into the world#and I've been clinging to knowing that if nothing else. I am able to help other people feel better.#but now for the first time in my life I'm like. free of it. I didnt even know it was possible... and I'm so sad how much I've lost out on#and so frustrated how my whole life I've been told to put up with it and push through it. and treated like a failure for it being too much.#and just. It has only been 2 weeks. but the lack of anxiety is SO noticeable I'm so...#I'll never miss it. the adhd is still pretty present but like whatever. I can manage that better.#and I'm just crying because of all this combined.#I just. I hope I get to finally be the best I can be now. for myself but also for you guys!
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idk sometimes seeing all the hate gege gets makes me sad. :( like I know alot of it is jokes/memes, but there are some people that are very serious and weird about it
#praying the extra volume content thats releasing in afew days doesnt make the fandom too crazy#like seeing ppl already getting ready to hate bc theres supposedly epilogue stuff w/ ozawa and theyre saying geges gonna ruin itafushi ????#pls dont let this become like what happened with the final volume of mha#gege get behind me-#when ppl get mad and say he doesnt know how to write his own characters :(#.....like have u ever considered that perhaps your interpretation of the character just doesnt match with canon#which is fine bc its all fiction and people can interpret however they want#but its so frustrating when they insult the actual creator for how they write the character#like ???? thats their own oc im pretty sure they know them better than you 💀#idk i think it has a lot to do with hcs that become almost universally accepted by the fandom people forget that they are hcs#ppl talking about gege like hes some irl villain playing 5dchess to make his readers suffer and everything he doee is of malicious intent#and then u go read an actual interview with him and its like: my pen name (gege akutami) basically means useless trash . i hate myself and#have self esteem issues so i have no idea why people actually like and support my lame ideas and cant believe it. thank u so much for all#the support it really means alot. ok now back to self deprecating#😭😭😭
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Dear fucking God
So I've been dreaming more about my most recent ex lately (likely bc we started dating around this time last year), which is frustrating me Immensely. So I decided, Fuck it, I'd try to join a dating app after all. At least to try see.
Tried looking into what app to use, and it seems like it's an entire goddamn cesspool of bots and disgustingly expensive subscription services. Nothing is rated well. What's rated better is reviewed elsewhere to just be full of hot air. Tinder seems to be mostly for hookups, not interested. Her sounds nice for some, but I'd be uncomfortable there as a nonbinary person. Hinge and Bumble seem to be viewed generally badly too. And it all leads back to OkCupid, which sounds nice In Theory with the selection options, but a lot of people are saying it's gone to the fuckin dumps. But it seems like *everything* is a fucking cesspool, so if something is even a Little bit useful, then maybe it's still worth a try.
So I said fuck it. Let's try OkCupid. Downloaded, started trying to sign up.... and then I get an error message saying it can't create the account????
Like ok. Fuck me I guess. This was a stupid idea anyways.
#speculation nation#negative/#i could also wander back onto Lex i guess but i want. specifically. something that allows for more selection.#i want to be able to filter by people who are interested in the same kind of relationship that i am#which Matters now that ive officially decided i do want to raise kids.#i dont want to waste my time with people who arent interested in that anymore.#but it's hard to just bring that up in conversation. so a selection process is nice.#but just... ugh. i hate all of this. and i hate that i cant just go out and meet people bc i have stupid anxiety about talking to strangers.#it just makes me uncomfortable. online is easier. and fuck dude i know a romantic relationship isnt the end all be all#and believe me id love it if i didnt feel so pressured to Be in one.#what id love is a domestic partnership thats not necessarily romantic. but does have the possibility of sex.#bc screw me i. well. lmao i do have an interest in that.#it's just the amatonormative bullshit of romance being the end all be all. them being my Everything. etc etc etc#i want someone who i enjoy being around who will make me feel good and would potentially be open to raising kids with me#but also wouldnt mind the fact that my brain doesnt fucking Do romance like normal people. it just doesn't.#if it werent for the fact that im pretty sure ive had actual romantic feelings at least 2 times in my life. id think i was just aro.#grey aro for sure. this shit is barely there. but sometimes...... so so rarely tho. not really worth the trouble.#but i DO want someone around to make my life easier and to give me attention and make me feel special. you know???#just so frustrating. all of this is frustrating. Ugh.
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told my therapist i'd text my mother and tell her not to come by (she asked/said she would cocme visit me THIS WEEKEND, i had a panic attack about it, we've all been there. probably)
but im so bloody tired of having to deal with this kinda stuff, therapy was exhausting, sitting with my emotions and not going insane was exhausting, and i'm also just. sleep-tired. proper tired. it's past midnight and i just want some warm tea and to go to bed soon
#alex yells at the void#i can text her tomorrow it's fine#anna (my therapist) is once again quite concerned about me#i did get pretty lost in my head towards the end#she was once again like i'm here for the next few days i check my emails every day blah blah im here if you need anything#as if i would ever ask for help like bloody hell i cant even out loud say that i dont want my mother to be around me for the foreseeable#future or whatever im just#it's in my head and im trying to say the things i need to say but it's like running into a cement wall head first#and the more i try and push the harder it gets#anyway. im terrified my therapist is gonna get frustrated with me#even though i know she's like the nicest person ever#but what can you do#anyway#tea fanfic bed
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people are really so weird and so fatphobic huh
(and oops most of my commentary is in the tags XD)
#people really out here acting like some chocolate is gonna kill you#idk maybe you should check how stats and data actually work and not just blindly trust things that get it wrong and such#because hate to break it to ya but increased risk does not equal absolute risk#it just increases the risk which is normally only by a small margin and doesnt mean anything in reality because it doesn't mean that it's#absolutely 100% going to happen that's not what risk or increased risk means#anyway this reminds of when a friend of mine took part in a study#and they were like oh yeah you have a 6% chance of a heart attack in the next 10 years#they asked if they lost weight would that decrease by a lot and the person was like uhh by like 1% it's really not the big deal everyone#makes it out to be people are just fatphobic because that's the society we've built that at all times you must be skinny#or you aren't worth anything or worse when people act like you're such a strain on the system#and that you dont deserve to have healthcare like i will scream#everyone needs to stop being so damn weird about it!!!!!!!!!!#it's literally fine it's so literally fine#you know actually thinking about increased risk with alcohol and smoking - to which is totally your choice and up to you btw#i knew someone who smoked like a chimney and drank like a fish and lived to his 70s and died of something completely unrelated#increased risk is just that increased by a certain percentage which is like not a lot in the grand scheme of things to really put it into#perspective when you have like 1 in 100 chance and the increased risk is 100% that just raises it to 2 in 100 which yes is just 1% to 2%#i will scream when people act like food is going to kill you - especially when it gets so bad people act like fruit is bad for you because#of sugar like i will cry i will start sobbing because all of this is why im pretty sure most people have disordered eating#if not full on eating disorders and that's the real concern how our attitudes make people change their behaviours and develop mental health#conditions because society is just so insistent on this one issue that you can't escape it's bad it's so bad and i hope one day#we get past all this and people can just live how they want without others getting on their backs#fatphobic people are the reason why so many people i know think they're worthless and ugly and i just that's so upsetting to me and yes yes#there's the major issues like doctors ignoring symptoms in favour of just lose weight! and then just send people into the world with 0 help#in that oh and oops now they've got an eating disorder when the problem in the first place was not weight <.<#and even if it was (which it rarely ever is) it's like okay where's the help then because there is no help and then study after study is#like oh btw dieting doesnt work lol and then what do you do what do you do im gonna start screaming hdfghsdfg#anyway sorry these tags are long im just so tired and so frustrated at the world and i hope one day people get over themselves
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My mom just sent a message to the family group chat suggesting that my siblings download the 'For the Strength of Youth' magazine on their Gospel Library app and talked about how much the youth magazines helped her testimony growing up and like, cool. Fine. Don't know why the 'sending random spiritual thoughts in the gc' thing started out of nowhere when it hadn't been a thing for a decade but this is just another one of those, and you're ofc allowed to talk about things that are significant in your life.
I don't think sending the 'What I Did When Someone Close to Me Challenged My Faith' article right afterwards was strictly necessary though 🙃
#hi bg mutuals 👋 i'm gonna vent about this from time to time. if any mutuals dont want to see it block the 'apostake' tag#trying not to read too much into it b/c I think I did last time something like this happened#and i dont want to make an ass of myself even if neither time would actually be in front of my parents#but like...i know that they know that one of my sisters is clearly PIMO#they went through her phone a couple weeks ago and i have no idea if they read my texts w/ her#but if they did they probably saw the conversation i had with her about some of the really common shelf-breakers#and telling her to take looking into it at her own pace b/c it's scary and overwhelming#(a conversation SHE started btw)#and when i talked to my parents about the larger context of that whole situation i talked about not having space to step back#and their response was that they give plenty of space b/c they dont make her go to seminary???#that's not the same thing as letting her openly question & potentially leave the church idk what to tell you#like. besties i dont know for sure what caused it (which is NOT making things better. it just feels potentially passive aggressive)#but from my end? it sure looks like it might be a reaction to that. probably not JUST that (friends exist) but.#if you think I'm whispering anti-mormon rhetoric into my siblings' ears just ask me. i'm very much NOT doing that#i'm just. talking? to them? when and if they come to me with questions?#and not making my answer 'well there's a reason our parents raised us in the church! ☺️'#(an actual argument given in the article my mom sent)#hate it. thanks#apostake#jay rambles#ok to interact#im not challenging anyone's faith. my patience though? INCREDIBLY challenged#gotta figure out how to work my way around a 'hey please dont send spiritual thoughts to the gc *I'm in*' talk tactfully#they've been pretty chill about me leaving over-all?? at least to my face#haven't pushed me to go to church w/ them; was fine with me not visiting for easter; didnt try to convince me to not drink coffee; etc#it's just. frustrating that they're not giving my siblings that still live with them that same grace#my sister's 17 ffs#it's very possible im way overreacting to the article. but what is tumblr for if not screaming into the void#religion#mormonism
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Honestly i have some strong opinions on selfshippers / yumejins and interacting with RP accounts of their oshis because i’ve seen some pretty disrespectful people
#☁️#just rambling#yume#selfshippers#Please check in with rper boundaries#Their muse may be your f/o but that doesnt mean they’re comfortable with you talking to them like that in character or not#Youd be surprised how many people i see being weird asf to rp accounts#I say this as someone who used to rp#less on tumblr or twt but in general#It’s just pretty frustrating to me i dont know. Do what you want but be respectful with it
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If I was more of a fanfic writer I would totally write like 50 oni timeloop ai fics and Id have to fight myself so hard to not make Olivia a significant part of all of them. Just like yeah Quinn timeloop au. They and Olivia regular at the same bar actually. Don't worry abt it.
#rat rambles#oni posting#I know in the past Ive said that jackie timeloop hypotheticals make me go crazy but if I were to hypothetically write a timeloop au itd be#an ellie one for sure shes just enough both in and out of the action and also enough of a bad person that it'd bring me great joy writing#her flounder and fuck everything up and become even worse of a person and not even feel guilty abt it#also Id totally have it not even be a satisfying loop ending condition itd be like a survival style timeloop but its just so she can#survive long enough for the world to end and die there instead#now for a less frustrating a depressing main character bubbles would be a decent option but I actively want a frustrating pov#I <3 povs that you wanna beat the shit out of so bad for their consistent fuck ups but you cant say its poor writing because in every#situation they fuck up in it Is what they would do and its what they would do every time#like watching a train crash except you get to watch the things that doomed the crash to happen as they happen#but yeah I think ellie would loose it so fast shed start emailing jackie hampster gifs out of frustration#I just dont rly see her as the type of person who would even for a second find the prospect of a timeloop exciting#like jackie would be absolutely ecstatic at first if she got trapped in a time loop she'd be so happy#not even because of the typical reasons its fully scientific curiosity#shed get disappointed pretty quick tho and probably rly confused due to it contradicting other theories of hers#but yeah maybe there'd be a part of ellie that had some scientific curiosity but I think itd be in more of a oh god damnit way#like oh fucking hell this just had to be possible didn't it I don't want to deal with the ramifications of this bullshit#because in universe time loops would probably impossible or at least would have to look very different#so a timeloop au would come with having to accept that contradiction and roll with it#which Im totally fine with I think its funny to have these scientists deal with blatantly impossible events#I thrive when fucking with characters I love
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(the tags are actually from me)
yeah you're probably right, i am basically just speculating as an outsider tbh
Holy fucking shit queer people really fucking hate masculinity
Like, I know anyone following me has seen me talk about this shit but fuck
This queer movie review podcast is talking about 70s glam rock fashion (a favorite of mine) and the one host says "an effeminate man is his true self, because masculinity is fake, the only way to be real is to be feminine"
Like, what the fuck? First of all, way to discount generations of queer people, and displays of queer masculinity, great job. Second, tell me you've never spoken to a trans man or a butch or literally anyone who's ever been forced into a feminine social role or feminine presentation without telling me.
I hate how pervasive this attitude is. I hate how it makes it uncomfortable, at best, to exist in queer spaces as someone who is not, can not, and does not want to be sufficiently feminine.
#ig i felt that way kinda bc it seems like ppl on here are only willing to let themselves criticize a religion if they think its dominated by#white ppl... which is kinda dumb to me bc like if you hold an opinion shouldnt you hold it across the board?#why do ppl think they cant criticize someone (if thats what they want to do) of a different religion typically not full of white ppl#it just seems a lil hypocritical idk. bc even if you're not direct to them they still know you probably feel that way and dont say it to#their face. which i personally would find pretty frustrating
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I NEED TO UNPACK SOME THINGS I NEED TO UNPACK SOME THINGS OHHHHH NOOOOO
#getting caught last night lying with a very stern 'i dont want you to to do that'#didnt even realize what i was doing#didnt even process that i didnt want to do it#not like in a bad way. i wasnt forcing myself#just didnt have any interest in doing it#my therapist says its good that i can sit with that discomfort which i know is true#im just embarrassed that i did it i guess#and it was noticeable#but clem has always been observant#it was nice and not nice to hear 'i don't want you to do that'#clem just scares me sometimes#not actually#just with his ability to act healthily#and ive been so good at setting and maintaining boundaries especially around sex#so its frustrating that I still have blind spots#but i know about this one now at least#just worried this reflects poorly on me and my ability to be a partner#but my therapist also said that me being in a long term relationship is a green flag for clem#and ive been beating myself up pretty hard for how i acted but i really shouldnt#just trying to be very above board with it all and healthy and im worried i cant? but i should trust me with me i guess#long post oh no
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you give inexperienced bsf!matt his first handjob
── .✦. ──
“are y’sure you’re ready baby? need to hear you say it.” you coo softly, poor boy could barely get a word out without whimpering. “y-yes.. please— just wan’ you to t-touch me!” his hips bucking up as you palm him through the thin layer of his sweatpants.
“kay’ sweet boy..” you begin to slide off his layers, the feeling of the fabric rubbing up against him makes him whine. hiding his face from embarrassment as he let out those sweet sounds you craved to hear. “dont hide from me baby, lemme see your face. yeah?” he slowly brings down his hand, opting to grip onto the bedsheets instead. “please y/n.. need y-your hand”
you smile at his desperation, once his sweats are gone you hook your fingers in his boxers and bring them down just enough to his mid thigh. you’re met with his hard cock, he twitches from the cool air exposed to him. “look at you.. mm— y’so big and pretty baby.” your hands slide up and down his thighs, purposely not touching him where he needs you most. “pl-pleaseee” he whines “please what? don’ know what you want unless you tell me baby..”
he squirms under your touch, growing more frustrated each second “pl- fuck! to-touch me, do anything! please i ne-need you” he pleads, trying his hardest not to do the job himself “good boy, s’proud of you sweet boy. just one more thing, kay?” your hand moves up to his mouth “spit baby, go ahead..” you coax him, a sweet smile adoring your face “y-yes ma’am”
after he does so you bring your hand down to his leaking cock “o-oh! fuck— ye-yes..” he groans, throwing his head back against the pillow “yeah? that feels good huh.. better than your own hand?” he vigorously nods his head, knuckles turning white due to his grip on the bed “f-faster baby.. please!” he breathes out “of course baby, can’t deny you when you sound like that..” your grip tightens around him and your pace quickens “oh- sh- shit! m’gonna fuck!” he hurriedly says.
“y’gonna what sweetheart? come on lemme hear that sweet voice” you tease “come! fuck- fuck! m’gonna come. d-don’ stop.. mmm” his hips moving up in rhythm with the thrusts of your hand “oohh look at you, soaking my hand like a slut. s’that what you are? just a greedy slut who needs nothing but attention, yeah?” your degrading words send him over the edge, thick ropes of white shoot out from him. “fuck! yes- yes, yes!”
“good boy, look at that.. all y’needed was a little bit of mean words and you’re a mess already.” you slowly removed your hand, looking over at matt all spent with his head thrown back and eyes shut from his previous orgasm. once he opens his eyes he’s met with the sight of you licking up the mess that he made.
“fuck..” his breathing heavy, shutting his eyes once more to help him calm down until he feels his overstimulated cock in your hold again. “oh you thought we were done baby?”
- avery’s note ˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆。-
“WE LOVE YOU SUB!MATT” we all say in unison. i live for sub!matt idc i need that man whimpering and whining underneath me NOW. im surprised i wrote this IN ONE SITTING?? (if there’s errors, shhh) anyway, enjoy bye i love youu !!
𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 - @ellaapsworld @chrissv4mp @jetaimevous @mattsbrowser @submattenthusiast @flouvela
#— ⋆ ˚。 writings .ᐟ ꩜#matt sturniolo imagine#sub!matt#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo blurb#matt sturniolo fluff#matt sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo triplets#matthew sturniolo x reader#sub!matt sturniolo
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Faking It (Logan Howlett x Fem!Reader)
𐙚 prompt: charles forces you and logan to do a mission together in order to help you bond. 𐙚 cw: enemies to lovers, one bed trope, if this does well i’ll do a part 2 w smut ;) cussing, 𐙚 a/n: thanks to everyone who's sent me req's! this wasnt a req but id already started it haha if youve sent a req ill try to get to it asap.... also so many ppl wanted to be added to a taglist but for the nsfw alphabet post i dont think it tagged like half the ppl?? so im sorry if u dont get tagged, im trying to fix it :)
18+ blog!! you are responsible for your own media consumption. if any of the above makes you uncomfortable, do not proceed.
“Professor, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean—”
“(Y/N), it’s not me you should be apologizing to. It’s your team. That’s who you both let down.” He eyes flick between you and Logan.
“I’ll go apologize to them now.” You turn to leave.
“You too Logan.” Charles says.
On this latest mission, you needed to sneak into a factory and take down all of the enemies— But you and Logan were arguing so loudly, you alerted all of the rivals, turning a few quick sneak attacks into full blown fights. No one was badly injured but you still felt horrible about it.
“This is all your fault.” You mumbled, just loud enough for Logan to hear.
“My fault? You’re kidding.” He huffs.
“Shut up.” You walk ahead of him, on the way to the common room to see your team.
Everyone was sitting there, talking amongst themselves. Once you and Logan entered, they all stopped their conversations and looked at you.
“Guys. I am so sorry about this mission.”
“I’m sorry, extremely sorry, and I apologize for my behavior.” Logan mocked your expression of regret.
“You are such a child, Logan! I’m trying to apologize!” You raised your voice.
“I am too!”
“Can you two just stop?” Hank stood up, silencing you both. “Your attitudes have been getting in the way of every mission. If you guys can’t get along then maybe you shouldn’t be here.”
“Oh..” You didn’t know how to respond. You couldn’t believe you let your dislike for Logan get in the way of your job, so much that they thought you shouldn’t be an X-Man anymore.
They all left the room, leaving just you and Logan to culminate in your thoughts.
“I think it’s pretty obvious we’re not going to get along any time soon.” He broke the silence.
“We’ll figure it out.”
“Yeah, whatever you say.” He walked out, as you sat in the empty room.
The next day, Xavier called you and Logan into his office yet again. You were concerned, worried he might be kicking you off the team. But instead, he said he had a mission for you two.
“I need you to pose as a couple. You’ll be going to an upscale hotel in Manhattan. It’s a cover for a drug smuggling ring. You two will stay as guests in order to collect information. I need everyone that is there, guests and workers alike, to think you two are madly in love. We don’t know who could be involved, so we can’t have them think anything suspicious.”
“Professor, is that the best idea? We just blew the last mission because we couldn’t stop arguing.”
“If you two fail this mission, I will have no choice but to replace both of you. You are amazing at what you do, but your arguing affects everyone. Not just yourselves.”
“Okay. We won’t let you down.” Logan speaks up.
***
The trip to the hotel was long and frustrating. You two couldn’t agree on anything the entire time. You criticized his driving, he criticized what you put on the radio, and how loud it was. You called him an old man, which just resulted in the radio being turned off and continuing the last hour drive there in silence.
When you arrived, it was late afternoon. Logan, pretending to be your fiance, grabbed all the bags by himself and walked inside. The hotel was huge. It was upscale, classy. So fancy you were afraid to touch anything, in fear it might break.
“Hi! Checking in for Anderson.” He greeted the front desk clerk, giving his forged name. He dropped the bags on the floor and you wrapped yourself around his now-free arm, squeezing it.
“Hello, Mr. Anderson.” She smiled back, “Let’s see. You had the penthouse, correct?”
“That’s right.”
“We’re celebrating our engagement!” You beamed, holding out your hand, showing off your fake engagement ring.
“That’s lovely. Congratulations! We’ll have a bottle of champagne in your room for celebration.”
“Thank you so much!” You squeaked.
He finished the check-in process, then you headed to the top floor.
The penthouse was absolutely gorgeous. It was huge, the size of a decent apartment. Just like the lobby, you were afraid to break something.
“Wow.. This is amazing. Only time I’ll ever get to stay in a penthouse and it’s with you.” You said, as he shut the door.
“I was just thinking the same thing. Now, c’mon we gotta go to the pool. Get changed.” He handed you your bag.
You opened it, pulling out your bikini. It was the only one you had, admittedly from a few years ago. You didn’t have time anymore to relax by a pool or go swimming in the ocean, so this swimsuit had to do. It was a simple black string bikini.
You went inside the bathroom to change. Once you had your swimsuit on, you felt a little self conscious at the amount of skin showing, but figured it’d help with the whole ‘can’t keep your hands off your new fiance’ vibe you and Logan needed to exude for this mission.
You walked out of the bathroom, faking confidence you didn’t have. Logan had taken the opportunity to just change in the living space since he was alone. He was wearing black swim trunks. It was funny, it looked like you two had matched on purpose.
“Wow.” He said quietly, clearing his throat.
“What? You like what you see?” You joked at his clear uncomfortableness with seeing you in such little clothing.
“Whatever, let’s just go.” He spat, grabbing two towels, the key, and exiting the room.
The second you were out the door, you both had big smiles on your face. His arm was around you, holding your side as you headed to the pool.
It wasn’t too busy, just a few kids with their parents, and a bartender at the outdoor bar. You told him you wanted a drink, so that’s where you headed first.
“Hey, can I get two Mojitos?” Logan asked, handing him the room key “And can you just charge it to our room?”
“Of course,” He started working on the drinks immediately, while you two sat and people-watched. He finished the drinks, and gave you them and the room key back.
You said thank you as you walked off, hoping Logan would just follow. There was a small hot tub that was empty, so that’s where you went. You stepped in carefully, afraid of slipping, and sat down in the warm water.
“Really?” Logan whispered, a fake smile still adorned on his face.
“This is what couples do, Logan. And we’re a couple for this weekend. So sit down and act like you love me, sweetie.” Your grin was starting to hurt your cheeks.
He sat down across from you, and you mentally rolled your eyes. You got up, and repositioned yourself, sitting in his lap, “What part of ‘act like you love me’ are you not getting?”
He was frozen for a moment, caught off guard but quickly acted like he was happy to have you there, to not draw suspicion. You both took sips of your drink, as you continued to nonchalantly looked around.
You two stayed at the pool for awhile, taking mental notes of the guests and employees you saw. Honestly, this hotel didn’t seem too strange. But Xavier said it was a front so you guessed that’s why it seemed so normal, for their cover.
Once your drinks were empty, and the sun had started to go down, you both decided to head back up to the room. He got out drying himself off before wrapping you up in your towel. He picked you up and carried you bridal-style to the penthouse.
“Logan!”
“What? Just acting like I love you.” He smirked.
Once inside the room, he set you down. “I’m gonna go shower.” You stated, not really knowing what to do.
He just nodded, walking off to the kitchenette. You grabbed your bag and headed to the bathroom.
***
You mentally cursed yourself as you scrambled through your bag, searching for a pair of pajama shorts you thought you packed, but they were nowhere to be found.
“This cannot be real.” You whispered. The only other clothes you brought were jean shorts, and you sure as hell weren’t going to sleep in those.
You pulled out your oversized sleepshirt, putting it on. The hem landed right above the middle of your thigh. It was a little shorter than the length of a nightgown, so you just hoped he wouldn’t notice. You slipped on a pair of panties, snatched up your things, and exited the bathroom.
You immediately bumped into Logan, who was standing right outside the door.
“What the fuck?” You raised your voice, annoyed. “Why are you right outside the door?”
“I was about to knock. You’ve been in there for over an hour.”
“It’s all yours!” You sassed.
You walked over to the small kitchen, and see he had already opened up the champagne. You had a glass as you sat on a barstool, writing down some notes about the people you’d observed earlier. Pouring yourself another glass, you headed over to the bed.
Just as you made yourself comfortable, Logan came out of the washroom, in just a towel. You stared at his wet torso for a moment, hypnotized.
“My eyes are up here.” He laughed.
You looked up, embarrassed.
“Forgot my clothes. Hey, wait, why are you in the bed?”
“…Because I’m the girl?”
“You're also the short one. I can’t fit on that couch.”
“Oh, c’mon. It’s a big bed. We can both fit just fine. Unless you’re nervous. Never slept with a girl before, Lo?”
He sighed, clearly not wanting to argue, before taking his clothes and escaping back to the bathroom. You silently celebrated your victory.
He came out a few moments later, turning off the lights, sliding under the blankets and getting comfortable. You both ended up facing the same direction. If he was any closer, he’d be the big spoon, but there was a few inches separating you.
You adjusted your body, and accidentally felt your ass rub against him. You went rigid from humiliation, before scooting away slightly, ignoring it since he didn’t say anything.
You tried to fall asleep, but it was difficult, for many reasons. One, you’re not used to having someone else in your bed. Two, he was breathing heavily. Three, you couldn’t stop thinking about how sexy he was.
Of course, you knew Logan was attractive, you’d thought that since the moment you first saw him. But today, probably because of the faux-gagement, the touching, the flirting, you saw him differently. He was still getting on your nerves, but the flames between you two… His body… It was unlike before.
You exhaled a breath you didn’t know you were holding. You twiddled your feet, moving around your body nervously, before unintentionally grazing your ass against his crotch again.
“Y’know, if you keep rubbing your ass against my dick, I’m gonna do something about it.” His words sounded gruff in your ear, but they gave you butterflies.
“Maybe that’s what I want.”
. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁
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#wolverine x reader#xmen#xmen wolverine#x men#wolverine smut#wolverine fanfic#wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#logan fluff#logan fanfic#logan fanfiction#logan smut#logan howlett#logan howlett fluff#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett smut#logan howlett fanfiction
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HELLOOOO
I got a silly little ask, just a drabble from you would be fine 😁
Like- the reader (gender neutral) wasn't very open about their hobbies and such. One of their hobbies was like martial arts or smth (THIS IS VERY CRUCIAL ☝️☝️☝️)
Wellll, one day Jimmy (🤮) decided to try and touch the reader inappropriately and they just throw him over their shoulder saying something along the lines of "Do NOT touch me."
I KNOW IT'S CRINGE BUT PLEASEEEE, IT WOULD BE SO FUNNY 🙏🙏🙏🙏
I saw you're writing for only Curly and Daisuke, but if you wanna you can add other characters into the mix. It's all platonic, just a silly little ask cuz I wanna laugh 😁😁😁
[ Tulpar Crew & Reader ]
Oh I love this one. Also this reminded me to update my list thank u 4 unintentionally reminding me anon.,.,. ALSO DONT WORRY I DONT THINK IT'S CRINGE !
gender neutral reader, it gets silly later on i promise. not proof-read. wrote this really quick.
⚠️ tw: stalking, jimmy being a little too forward and close
The day was pretty much mundane, like always. Everyone was in their designated work stations, including you of course. Though, something felt off. It had been like this for the past week, and you hated it. You even blamed your lack of sleep for it. It seemed like there was something— someone, watching and following you when you were alone.
One time, you'd even woken up to the sound of your quarter's door closing. You stayed up all night, not wanting to inconvenience the other crew members for what you think might just be all in your head. Well, that is until psych evaluation day came and you opened up about this to Anya who so easily believed you, but seemed so uncomfortable with the topic. You decided not to pry out of respect. She offers her company when you need it.
That same night, Daisuke offered to host a game session to which everyone reluctantly agreed to.
Establishing good bonds between workers is key to an efficient working environment!
Anya, Swansea and Daisuke were sitting by the sofa, Curly dragged a chair just beside the game table, whilst you and Jimmy sat beside each other on the floor. The game involved four players and the crew decided that whoever loses first has to swap with whoever hasn't played yet for the next rounds. The game was getting heated, Daisuke and Anya, neck on neck. Unfortunately, not the only thing neck on neck. Everyone else was too focused on the game to even notice what Jimmy was doing. You can feel his breath against your skin. You eyed the others in hopes that they would see. Too busy. Annoyed and grossed out, you elbowed his ribs in warning, glaring at him. "Jimmy, don't touch me." He seems pissed, but that doesn't deter him from getting his entertainment. Jimmy presses on and you swear you felt your eyebrows twitch. The balls of this guy to even do this here.
Daisuke throws the dice, the three leans in in anticipation as they watch it slowly roll to a stop and—
CRASH!
Some game pieces flew in different directions, two table legs snapping from the force and Jimmy's weight. It was radio silent for a moment. The crew having different variations of shocked expressions. You had grabbed his arm and flipped his body onto the furniture.
"Fuckin' pervert. Are you deaf, or what? I said do NOT touch me."
Daisuke threw his hands up in the air and settled it on each side of his head, frustrated. "Oh, come on, man! I was so close to winni—!" His whining ceases when Swansea nudges him, instantly shutting up and processing what had just happened. It took a few blinks for him to register and he eventually bursts out laughing and pointing at Jimmy. It took everything from Swansea not to burst out laughing as well. Instead, he crosses his arms and huffs with a proud smile. 'Atta' kid.'
Anya on the other hand slips out a gasp, covering her mouth. Mostly out of shock, and no sympathy for the man whatsoever. When the other intern started laughing, she had to bite her lip and look away to suppress her own fit.
[ History of glenohumeral joint subluxation.
It happened way too fast for Jimmy to even process what just happened. He spits out something hard, probably a tooth. His shoulder slightly stings as well, probably dislocated. He'll get back at you some other time, he can't get back at you when everyone else is here and that pisses him off even more.
Curly had mixed feelings. But of course, he prioritizes his role and he has to mediate everything first and foremost. Rubbing his face, he sighs and stands up, putting his hands on his hips. He calls your name and you tilted your head to look up at him. "I have to discuss... this with you later on. Please drop by the cockpit, yeah?" You roll your eyes and nod, pouting. "Swansea, could we borrow your intern real quick?"
"Shift's over, go ahead."
He gives the eldest a nod. "Daisuke, please assist Anya. Help her bring Jimmy to medical."
"Youuuuu got it, Big C." He finger guns towards the captain then stands up to hover over the co-pilot. Curly could only give Daisuke an awkward smile at the nickname.
"Never call him that again."
"El Capitano." Daisuke helps Jimmy up, making sure he's pulling them up by the injured arm, making the man grit his teeth and groan in pain. Before the guy could even cuss at the intern, Swansea continued bickering.
"Do your damn job."
"Yessir. Swansir."
Anya and Daisuke finally went off the bring the poor injured co-pilot to treat him. And if you'd like to know, Anya taught Daisuke how to pull Jimmy's shoulder back to place. Yes, everyone heard him when it happened.
You helped Swansea clean up the mess by the lounge and in apology, offered to help repair the table the next day. He agrees and even offers Daisuke to assist you.
Curly had to lightly reprimand you for your actions, but you'd explained to him what happened. The best he could do for you for now is lie on the report.
Sustained through occupational accident.
Employee confirmed inebriated while working.
Property damage docked to Jimmy.]
#tulpar#tulpar crew#daisuke#curly#anya#swansea#jimmy#mouthwashing#daisuke mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing#swansea mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#x reader#gender neutral reader#anya x reader#curly x reader#daisuke x reader#swansea x reader#jimmy x reader#tulpar crew x reader
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𝓹𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓾𝓹
— ( do note this ask was sent before my rules post was out but ill let it pass bcz it doesnt break any rules )
ah hello ! !! this is the first time im writing for jingyuan sama ..! hopefully its to your liking anon .. <:D tho i did self indulge a lil much on this ... hopefully you still like it x_x
also , yes .! i love ryona . i dig it a lot .. please dont b scared to req anything with dark themes .. i will be cheering you on !
pair — reader x jing yuan
wc — ~1k
contains — sub bottom char, dom top reader, established relationship, gn reader, possessive reader, jealousy, (false) cheating suspicions, reader is kinda fucked up in the head, size difference (smaller reader), thigh humping, dry humping, reader is pretty forceful
you couldn’t stand it.
the way he would ignore you sometimes, when you two just wouldn’t be able to have some pda for the sake of his reputation. it pissed you off.
you want to love him! show him off, maybe. hug him, kiss him, hold his hand.. all in public. but you can’t — because he has a reputation to uphold here. and what made you more mad is the fact you’d hear your own colleagues talk about him. how they want to get with him.
what pissed you off the most about today, though? you heard someone spreading rumors. dating rumors. not between you and jing yuan, no. (you would’ve appreciated that, really) it was between him and some other woman — one that he’s been working with for a good while.
you clicked your tongue, entering his office. even just from your face it was obvious you were in a horrible mood.
“oh?” he started, with that usual lazy smile of his — “my dear, something on your mind?”
he shifted in his seat, adjusting himself so you could sit yourself beside him — which, you do — letting out a tired sigh. “rumours about you again, love.” you respond.
“mm, it’s the one with that woman, i assume?”
you click your tongue again. just hearing anything related to her set you off — c’mon, now.. it’s not like they’re actually together.. your dearest would never, ever betray you in such a way.
but you see the way that woman was — how she was smiling and all. laughing those rumors off, all while clearly enjoying the attention she got. it disgusts you. it worsens your mood more and more as you thought about it.
the general could sense your frustration — almost as if he read your mind. his expression softened a little bit, this time looking at you. watching you biting on your nail, whilst the other hand was balled into a fist, resting on your thigh.
“hey,” you looked back at him. the frustration was clear in your eyes. even you, yourself didn’t get it. what were you so angry about…? you can’t help but take it out on him. “you love me, right, jing yuan?”
“of course I do.” he replies — it’s short. it’s obvious. but in your messed up little head, it felt like nothing but a lie.
“prove it.”
“wha–?”
“prove it, i said.” you lean into him, a hand against his stomach. the gold part of his belt felt cool against your palm. for a second, it gives you shivers.
“here..?” the general’s voice was filled with uncertainty. “the door is still unlo–”
“that doesn’t matter.” you interrupt, “they’re not allowed to come in, right? locked or not. just tell them to leave if someone knocks. simple.”
jing yuan gulped down, eyeing the door once more before giving in — fumbling with his belt. slowly but surely getting that corset-like piece of armor loose and discarding it completely.
he’s so obedient whenever you were mad…
“c’mere.” you pat on your thigh, inviting him to sit on it — he does, obeying you. you were upset, he didn’t want your mood to go even lower. though, due to jing yuan being bigger than you, he was quite hesitant on putting his entire weight — he knows he’s quite heavy.. but you insist he sits down properly.
he felt shy all of a sudden — putting his hands on your shoulders, nuzzling his face into your neck. you didn’t know if this shyness was a result of the position, or the fact the door was very much unlocked — maybe both.
you had a hand on his lower back, as if inviting for the white-haired general — your free hand decided to run through his hair. it’s so soft… how could you not?
jing yuan lets out a whimper, hips moving on his own. slowly but surely running them up and down your thigh. his own legs shaking. you slip your hand into the side of his pants — feeling around his waist. he jolts at your cold hands, letting out a small gasp. those hands of yours continue to trace through his body, feeling his breath grow a little faster. feeling all over his back, his hips, his waist, him. just him.
you wanted to escalate this, though, you heard something. something he feared. a knock at the door.
“jing yuan, sir?”
a voice is heard, calling to the general. you could clearly hear his breath hitch. “a– ah.. who—nnh��!”
those hands of yours continued to tease him. featherlight touches all over his body, teasing him by slipping your hands into his pants every now and then — watching your darling general explain why the person couldn’t come in — stuttering on his words, trying to reason with them..
you felt mean today. you were in a shitty mood, after all.
he lets out a sigh of release when they finally decide to go — whoever that was leaving his office alone for another time. finally, he gets to calm down.
“i love you.” you whisper into his ear suddenly, “you love me too, right? you wouldn’t go for that woman, right? right?”
why did you doubt him, even?
you don’t know, nor did you care. all you wanted to hear was an ‘i love you, too’ from the general.. your general.
his weight was kind of crushing you.. but you didn’t mind it much. you pressed a kiss onto his neck, sucking into it to form a hickey. then another… and another. it didn’t take too long for his entire neck to be covered by them. you loved it.. marking him up as yours (as if wasn’t already..)
“m’gonna–” his grinding was growing a bit more desperate — damn, already?
“go on. show me how much you love me.” — those words made him whimper, closing his eyes. you pulled on his hair, yanking his head so jing yuan was looking at you — grabbing his face with one of your hands and inviting him into a messy kiss — tongue being forcefully shoved into his mouth.
“i love you, i love you, i love you.. mmMH—!” he said between eager gasps, feeling his orgasm washing over him. you could, too — that warm feeling on your thigh.
he wraps his big arms around you, moans being muffled by the kiss. he just couldn’t get enough, can he? he wouldn’t even care anymore if someone came in and saw him this way. neither did you. at least they’d know you were his.
“i love you, darling. please ruin me..”
hsr masterlist ♥︎
#♱ library of ruins .#♱ rabbit hole .#✸ astral express .#✸ cloud knights .#✦ jing yuan .#hsr#hsr smut#honkai star rail#honkai star rail x reader#sub hsr#jing yuan#jing yuan x reader#sub jing yuan#dom reader#sub character
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cam girl (part four)
pairing rafe cameron x female reader
rating explicit 18+
summary you work two jobs. by day, you’re a maid for the cameron household, where rafe degrades you any chance he can get. by night, you’re a cam girl, hiding your face so nobody can recognize you. when you discover your new subscriber, the filthy-mouthed man obsessively paying you to do everything he can think of, is rafe, you’re not sure what to do next.
» masterlist
+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*
You don’t know how you got through the rest of your housekeeping shift after being with Rafe. You don’t even know how you got through the rest of the day.
He still wants you to host private sessions for him, still wants to pay to watch you do things to yourself. So here you are, obeying him as usual, sitting on your bed, in front of your laptop, dressed in white lingerie and aching for a release.
figure8 has joined the session.
figure8: hi princess
“Don’t ‘hi, princess’ me, Rafe,” you say. “You have any idea how I feel right now?”
You’re still so pent up from how be denied you an orgasm earlier that day. After work, you tried to study, but you were so distractedly horny.
Still, you listened to his instructions not to give yourself the release you needed until you were on camera with him tonight. And even through the frustrating anticipation, knowing your next orgasm has his name on it, knowing he wants to dominate you like this, is so gratifying.
figure8: someone’s grumpy
figure8 tipped you $500.
figure8: feel better?
You stifle your smirk.
“Can I open this yet?” you ask, holding the box he gave you, still sealed.
figure8: you dont have to hide your face anymore
You instinctually arranged yourself how you always did when you set up your camera, but you realize he’s right. He’s seen your face already. He’s seen everything already.
You reposition to show all of you on the screen, viewing the mirror image, the pout on your face apparent.
figure8: my pretty girl. i cant stop thinking about how your face looked covered in my cum today
You can’t control your smile at his message. Shit. You were supposed to be mad at him.
“Speaking of cumming…” you say slyly. “When can I?” Your confidence is always so high, your attitude so ballsy when you’re on cam.
It’s like the real you comes out, no inhibitions whatsoever. You still can’t believe how speechless he had you in his bedroom earlier today, but you know the next time you see him in person, you’ll be able to talk to him the way you always do on during your video sessions.
figure8: open the box
You sigh a breath of relief, pulling off the pink bow and taking off the cover. On a bed of white silk lays a small, pink c-shaped sex toy. You turn it over in your hands, trying to see how it works. The chat chimes.
figure8: you look so cute trying to figure it out
“Stop teasing me,” you tell him.
figure8: no
You continue to study the item Rafe bought you, slowly understanding what part is supposed to go inside of you and what part is supposed to go against your clit.
But there aren’t any buttons.
“How does this work, baby?” you ask, your frustration dissolving as curiosity takes over.
figure8: ready?
Seconds later, you feel the toy buzz in your hands.
“Are you… controlling this?” you ask, amused. You would have never expected Rafe to be so kinky.
figure8: get naked and put it in your pussy
Eagerly, you strip off your bra and panties, spreading your legs in front of the camera like you’re straddling your laptop.
figure8: wait
You sit with your legs spread, feeling your eyebrows furrow. He’s making you wait again?
figure8: just want to look at that sweet pussy again. you tasted so good
You think back to Rafe’s head between your legs earlier that day, the way his mouth lapped and fluttered over your folds.
You can see on the screen that you have small marks on the inside of your thighs. He left hickies on you with all his teasing. He put marks on you, like he promised he would.
“You like when I do this, don’t you?” you ask, pulling your pussy lips apart.
figure8: i’m hard as fuck
“Yeah?” you coo. “You ate me out so nice today. Hopefully next time you’ll let me finish.”
figure8: so desperate for me
You put your hand at your center, rubbing right where you’re throbbing to at least ease the pain just a bit.
“Can I use the toy, baby?” you try to sweet-talk him.
figure8: go ahead. put it in and stay sitting just like that
You pick up the silicone toy, sliding the bottom part into your hole and shuddering. The top curve rests against your clit and you sit back, hands behind you as you support yourself.
figure8: i love seeing that cunt full
“When is it going to be full with your dick?”
figure8: when i say so
You sigh and grind your hips forward. The toy gently buzzes inside of you and you dip your head back, a choked moan spilling out of your lips.
The vibrations are rhythmic and far apart, but at least you’re finally getting some stimulation.
The other part of the vibrator starts moving, suctioning over your clit. The sensation of both ends working you, of knowing Rafe is controlling it on the other side of town, lying in his bed and watching you with his hard dick in his hand, adds to how hot all of this is.
You arch your back as the toy buzzes and sucks and you start to roll your hips.
The chat chimes.
figure8: keep your eyes on the screen so u can see how pretty u look when you’re moaning
“Okay,” you obey breathlessly. You watch yourself on the screen, tits out, pussy squeezing around the toy Rafe bought you.
He keeps the same low setting on for a few minutes and you softly moan through the sensations. He knows this isn’t enough to make you cum but you don’t want to whine.
figure8: ready for more?
“Please,” you plead. The buzzing in you grows stronger, your walls clenching around the toy. “Shit, Rafe.”
figure8: feels good?
“So good,” you sighed. “So fucking good.”
figure8: play with your tits for me, princess
You sit up, putting your hands over your chest, fondling your breasts. You pinch your nipples and rub your fingers over them.
figure8: my good girl
The vibrator’s buzzing gets even more intense and you squeeze your legs together to get the most out of it.
The toy immediately stops moving.
“Rafe,” you groan.
figure8: you didn’t listen
“Sorry, I’m sorry,” you shudder. You spread your legs for him again and look at the screen at your own desperate expression. Thankfully, you feel the toy move again, but it’s at the low setting you started at.
You won’t complain. He’ll delay the orgasm even more.
Eventually, you’re at the second level again and you quiver at how good it feels.
“Can we go a little faster? Please?” you purr, the knot inside you tightening.
figure8: god i thought i could do this but i can’t. where are you. i need to fuck you
The message makes your stomach flutter with butterflies. The thought of him pounding into you on your bed, of you not having to make yourself cum with your hand or a toy, thrills you.
“Now who’s impatient?” you ask with a smirk.
figure8: whats the address
“Let me just type it out for you,” you say slowly, enjoying this small window of control you’re in.
You type it out in seconds, but keep your hands over the keyboard before sending it to purposely make him wait, tits squeezed together up to the camera for him to see.
He only messages your name and you laugh at his neediness. Then a second message comes in.
figure8: you’ll pay for this
“Scary,” you mock. In reality, you’re really excited to see what punishment looks like to him. You finally hit the enter key.
figure8 tipped you $1000.
Rafe leaves the chat.
The fact that he still paid you is a pleasant surprise. In just a few days, you’ve fattened up your bank account quite nicely just from pleasuring yourself for him.
There’s a knock at your apartment door after what feels like an eternity. You open it a few inches, peeking out to see Rafe, and you shield yourself with the door as you open it to avoid anyone else in the hallway possibly seeing you nearly naked.
You figured there was no reason getting fully dressed, only putting your panties on.
With how much he loves to tell you he owns you, you’re sure Rafe wouldn’t take it well if a neighbor accidentally saw you exposed. He won’t even allow you to cam for other guys anymore.
You lock the door, leaning back on it with your arms crossed.
He towers over you, his presence so damn demanding in your tiny apartment. Your whole place would fit in his bedroom. He probably hasn’t ever been inside a home this small.
His eyes are fixed on your tits, the burning in his eyes giving you a warm sense of satisfaction.
“What was it that made you need to come fuck me yourself?” you ask with a smirk.
Maybe it’s because you’re in your own home, but now you have the confidence to tease him how you always do on cam, the shock of him knowing who you were during your sessions now worn off.
Rafe’s clearly amused, closing the distance between you, placing a hand up on the door as he dips his head to look down at you.
“You’re acting like you weren’t just asking when you can get my dick inside you,” he says, voice deep and dripping with desire. His lips curl into a smile, his perfect teeth peeking behind them.
Your fingers feverishly find the hem of his t-shirt and you start to pull it up, hungry to see him naked again.
“Can’t wait for it, can you?” Rafe asks, standing straight and bunching the fabric between his shoulder blades, pulling the shirt off for you and dropping it.
“I’m not the one who just drove all the way over here to fuck,” you taunt. Your eyes fall down his toned chest, the ridges of his abs. “And I’m needy?”
You love this back-and-forth power struggle with him. It’s like a game, a competition to see which one of you is more desperate for the other.
And honestly, it feels a little like payback for the orgasm he denied you today.
He brings his hands up your sides, sliding up to your tits, putting his cool palms on your chest and squeezing and fondling in a way that makes you sigh with pleasure.
“I have to fuck that attitude out of you,” he huffs. You giggle at his words, feeling your core pulse with desire.
Before you started anything with him, you thought Rafe was just another privileged, entitled asshole who’s painfully hot and knows it. But you’re actually having fun with him, teasing each other like this.
Your hands wander over his hard chest, smoothing over his worked out pecs.
“You can try,” you retort. He leans down and locks his lips on yours. His body curls up against you, your back pressed against the door as he grinds against you, his cock hard.
His hands cup your ass and he suddenly hikes you up. You wrap your arms and legs around him, your damp panties pressed against his hard stomach.
You dip your head into the crook of his neck and he smells like expensive cologne and salty sweat and man, making the tension coil inside you even tighter.
“Show me where you fuck yourself for me every night,” he orders, breath hot against your ear.
You pull back to meet his eyes, looking down at him through heavy lids. You wordlessly motion to the open door into your bedroom.
Rafe carries you through your apartment and lowers you onto your bed, hovering over you as he continues to kiss you roughly, tongue tumbling with yours. He traps your bottom lip between his teeth, the twinge of pain mixing so well with the pleasure.
You feel his hand rest on your pussy and your nerves are on fire.
“This is mine,” he rasps against your lips.
“Yours,” you say.
He rubs over your panties in broad circles, dipping his head down to your collarbone, tongue slowly darting out as he sucks. You’re sure he’ll leave another hickey on you.
You feel him press his finger over your hole, nudging the fabric of your panties against you.
You’ve officially lost all your patience.
“Please fuck me,” you say. You’re not even being needy because he likes it - you are fully desperate. “I’ll beg as much as I need to, okay? Just… please. I need you so fucking bad.”
Rafe pulls away, looking down at you in the dim light of your bedroom. His smirk is so damn smug and so damn arrogant. You’re stroking his ego and he loves it.
“I told you that you’ll pay for that little game you played,” Rafe threatens.
“Rafe,” you moan, squirming below him.
“I thought you might touch yourself the second you got home… but I can tell you listened to me.”
“I did,” you reassure him. “Do whatever you want to me. Just let me cum.”
“Whatever?” he echoes, dimples taunting you. You bring your hands up to his shoulders, nails digging into the back of his neck. This is fucking torture.
“Anything, Rafe,” you promise.
“What if I want you on your knees so I can fuck that pretty mouth as hard as I want?” The thought makes you feel like you’ve entirely drenched your underwear.
“Yes, yes,” you say, nodding desperately. “Please. Anything.”
He laughs so damn pompously and degradingly, like your need for him is comical.
“It’s not funny,” you whine.
“I’d be balls deep in you right now if you didn’t fuck with me,” he tells you. You regret not just giving him your address immediately. Teasing him wasn’t worth it.
He gets up, taking his hand off your pussy and encircling your wrist, beckoning you to sit up.
“On the floor, princess,” he instructs.
You quickly settle on the rug next to your bed, knees on the floor and hands on your lap as you look up at him.
Rafe stands and unzips his jeans in front of you and pulls them down, left in gray briefs that do no work hiding the thick shape of his dick.
When he takes off his last piece of clothing, his cock bucks out, precum already leaking out the tip. You could tease him about how horny he is for you, but you know better.
He starts to slowly stroke his length.
“Eyes up,” he says. You obey and look up at him, knowing the amused, perverse way he’s gazing down at you will not soon leave your memory. You don’t want it to.
He pats his dick on your parted lips, your bottom lip quivering beneath the weight of it.
“You sucked it so good today,” Rafe taunts. “And look at you doing it again. You like this cock?”
“I love it,” you tell him.
He pinches your chin so you’ll open your mouth wider and slowly pushes himself in, his breath shaky as your mouth takes him all.
The base of his cock presses against your nose and you squeeze your fists tight, pussy aching in need. As bad as you want him inside of you, this feeling is so fucking perfect.
He puts his hands on the sides of your head, thumbs pressed on your temples.
“You’re gonna keep that pretty mouth open just like this, okay?” he instructs.
You nod, mouth full.
He pulls back, then pumps back into you. You gag and you hear him groan.
“That fucking sound…” he says.
He bucks in and out again, faster this time. You close your eyes from the pleasure of being used by him like this.
“Eyes.” His voice is husky. You meet his gaze again. “Good girl.”
Rafe’s pumps start to speed up, the tip of his dick sliding deep in your throat. His grip on your head tightens as he starts to lose himself in the feeling, his groans so damn hot that you wish you were recording this so you could play it back the next time you’re touching yourself.
But then again, it seems like Rafe has full control over when and where and how you masturbate.
He keeps fucking your face and you choke again after a deep thrust, starting to slobber on his cock. He pumps once more, deep, and you let out a strangled gag, tears forming.
He pulls out suddenly, his eyes frantically searching yours.
“Is it too much?” The concern on his face, the fact that he’s checking in on you like this, makes you realize just how wrong you were about this man. He is so much more than you thought.
Even in the eroticism of the moment, your heart feels like it flutters from Rafe’s display of care.
“No,” you tell him, wiping the spit around your mouth off with the back of your hand. “Keep going.”
He enters your mouth again and you fucking love it. The way he tastes, how hard he is, how smooth he is. It’s perfection.
Rafe returns to his fast pace, rocking in and out of your mouth, his eyes on yours the entire time. After a few more thrusts, he takes out his wet cock and puts one hand on the base of his length and the other at the back of your neck.
“You need to be fucked, don’t you, princess?” he asks.
“Please,” you whisper, anticipation bubbling inside of you. Finally, his cock will be right where you need it.
He applies pressure to the back of your neck, beckoning you to stand. On weak knees, you lift yourself up and let him guide you down onto your bed.
You lie on your back and Rafe leans down to slide his fingers under the band of your panties. You put your legs together so he can slide them down and off of you.
The mattress sinks as he bows to lie over you, his hands on the bed at either side of your head. You gaze up at him, the planes of his cheeks, the slope of his nose.
“You’re fucking beautiful, you know that?” Rafe rasps.
You’re thinking the same thing about him, but you’re so starved that you can’t say a single word.
Your cunt is dripping and goosebumps spread across every inch of your naked body. And you’ve never been happier that you’re on the pill, so you can feel him fuck you without a barrier.
One of his hands dip low to guide himself into you and you swear that you can see stars once you feel his tip nudge against your opening.
You shut your eyes and hear his sharp intake of breath as he enters you fully.
“God,” you shudder, the weakness in your voice shocking you. Nobody has ever had this effect on you, felt this nice in you. “Oh, my God.”
“Shit, that’s so fucking good,” he praises, bottoming out inside of you.
It hurts a little at first. You expected it with his size. But your body adjusts quickly and you feel nothing but bliss.
You find the strength to link your legs around him tightly, trapping him, afraid he’ll tease you again.
“It’s okay, baby, I’m not going anywhere,” Rafe says with a chuckle, bending to press his lips against yours.
His weight is on you, his dick is filling you, his lips are pulling yours, and you want to stay in the moment forever.
He seems to savor the feeling of being inside of you for a moment, and then pulls back and plunges deep inside you again. You turn your head to the side, away from his mouth so you can speak.
“Harder, please,” you beg impatiently.
“We have all night,” he says. You can feel his smile against your cheek.
You let out a hopeless whimper and he seems to have a moment of sympathy, realizing just how tortuously he’s been teasing you.
Rafe pulls back then rocks back into you harder, jolting your body with pleasure. The bed starts to squeak as he rolls his hips, thrusting in and out of you.
You groan, hooking your arms around him, hands pressed on his shoulders. He presses his face into the crook of your neck, his breath hot on you.
His muscles flex under your palms as he jerks his fat cock into you, rubbing against your walls, reaching deep inside you.
“You like that?” he whispers, his hot breath pressing on your neck.
“You fill me up so nice,” you moan. “Fuck, Rafe.”
“This pussy is so fucking perfect,” he says.
He straightens, holding himself up with locked arms, gazing at you with heavy lids, looking drunk off the feeling of fucking you. Your tits bob up and down with his rough movements, your chest heaving.
“Play with yourself,” he tells you. “You deserve to cum nice and hard, princess.”
You smile gratefully and immediately circle your clit with your fingers, the sensation mind-blowing. Rafe continues to pump in and out hard, looking down as you touch yourself, getting a private show out of you even in person.
He watches you in what you can only describe is awe, and dips his long forefinger inside your mouth. You wrap your lips around his finger, sucking on it as he thrashes into you.
You feel yourself inching closer to your peak. You shut your eyes and arch your back, lips parting as you pant with each thrust.
A million fireworks explode inside of you when you finally cum. You clench around Rafe and feel him go even harder when his hot liquid pools into you.
He’s breathing just as hard as you are when he slowly pulls out. You hate the feeling of him leaving your body.
He collapses beside you, both of you looking up at the ceiling as you come down from the high.
You could pass out in seconds and you figure Rafe is not the kind of guy that cuddles. But because of the rough neighborhood you live in, you need to make sure the door’s locked behind him.
Before you can figure out how to ask him if he wants to stay, knowing he’ll say no, you hear a dreadful rattle.
“Fuck,” you groan.
“What was that?” Rafe asks.
“My heat just broke again,” you say. “The radiator is shit.”
You mentally go through the catalogue of what you need to do - find your extra blankets, bring out the space heater, keep trying to turn on the radiator even though you know it’s pointless.
“Again?”
“My landlord’s an ass. He’s supposed to fix it but never actually does.”
“So… what?”
“What do you mean?” you turn to look at Rafe, the soft lighting in your room casting shadows on his pretty face.
“What do you do now?”
“Bundle up,” you say with a defeated chuckle. “It usually starts working again in a few days.”
“Don’t you… can’t you call someone?” he asks. What a rich person thing to say. Call someone. The answer to everything.
“It’s too expensive,” you say. “And it’s not even on me. My landlord’s supposed to do it.”
“It’s, like, thirty degrees outside.” You’re not sure if he’s teasing or laughing at you right now, but you can’t take it. He can berate you all he wants sexually, mocking how much you want him, but your financial situation isn’t on the table.
“I know you love to give me shit, but don’t… not over this, okay?” you say.
Rafe nods quickly. You’re not sure if this means he was about to mess with you about it but won’t, or if it means he wouldn’t taunt you about it in the first place.
“How much would it cost? To fix?” he asks.
“I had someone come look at it a while ago and it cost $200 just for him to tell me it’s a $3000 fix since it’s such an old system.”
“That’s nothing,” he says.
At this point, you have to laugh. He is so fucking out of touch.
“Rafe, how much do you think I make cleaning your house?” you ask. You hope you don’t have to spell it out for him. You’re a maid. For fuck’s sake, you started to get naked for strangers online to make extra money. You’re clearly not in a great spot financially.
And sure, his tips are helping to cover bills, but you still have tuition and loans and rent to worry about.
Rafe doesn’t say anything. He just looks back up at the ceiling, giving you a chance to gaze at his profile.
This man doesn’t know how good he has it. He’s never had to worry about the cost of home repairs. Or rent. Or bills.
You knew Rafe was from a different world. For fuck’s sake, you cleaned his mansion twice a week - you saw the life he lived. But this makes you see just how far removed he is from what life is like for somebody like you.
“You gonna get on camera for me again tomorrow?” he finally asks. You can’t help but laugh. His mind is in the gutter. Of course. You knew not to expect much from him.
“Sure, baby,” you say. “I like that toy you got me. How do you control it?”
“On my phone,” he says. He shifts in bed, getting up, and you figure this is the end of the night.
You yawn and try to will your tired body to sit up. But Rafe lies back down, his phone in his hand. He must have taken it out of the pocket of his jeans.
He opens an app in front of you, showing the buttons on the screen that trigger different modes. If you weren’t so exhausted from how hard he fucked you, you’d probably ask to play with it right now.
You watch him close the app and tap on the green “Phone” app. He hands it to you.
“Here,” he says. “Put your number in.”
Caught off guard, you take Rafe’s phone - the newest iPhone, of course - and type in your digits. Why would he need to contact you outside of the cam website?
Probably for booty calls like these. This guy is only keeping you around to watch you on cam or fuck you. He only has one setting. Horny.
Then Rafe gets up again, and this time he’s clearly ready to leave, pulling his briefs up. You take a moment to appreciate how nice his ass is.
You wrap one of your smaller blankets around you and follow him out to your front door.
Rafe bends to pick up his shirt off the floor and you notice the logo as he pulls it on. That shirt he carelessly tossed to the ground costs the same as your rent. Probably more.
He turns to look at you, his frame large, his hand on the doorknob.
“This was fun,” he says. “Next time, I’m fucking you from behind.”
“Deal,” you say with a playful shove.
After showering and brushing your teeth, you get out the extra blankets and the loud, old space heater you keep in your closet.
You settle into bed, taking out your phone to set an alarm so you can wake up early tomorrow and get a head-start on studying.
A notification on your screen shocks you. An unknown number sent you $3000.
{ read part five here }
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Holy sh*t, how did you make your menu look that amazing?! I'm in awe no joke. So this is gonna be rough, brace with me (my english sucks.) So could i order a deep dish pizza with alfredo sauce, basil, banana peppers, spinach, roasted mushrooms, goat cheese, eggplant and Oregano. (Damn thats a lot oop-. Kind of sounds disgusting IRL but we dont judge.) With a sprite, Truly and a mojito plus a little dessert. Served by Oliver Bearman please? Thank youuuu <3 (its okay if you're too busy for this)
Lee-Lee's Pizzeria Menu
deep dish teammates to lovers alfredo sweet sex basil "I love to watch my cum leak from your pretty pussy" banana peppers "Look so pretty riding my cock" spinach "Awe I love to know I stretched you out just enough to take all my cock" roasted mushroom “Fucking you so good you I can see myself in your tummy” goat cheese "Look so pretty like this" eggplant "Are you sure you want me to take it baby?" oregano "Please, let me cum in you" sprite size kink truly belly bulge mojito loss of virginity dessert yes served by Ollie Bearman
TW - virginity loss. unprotected sex, creampie, fingering, sweet/ slow sex
WC 2100+
Y/N POV
"Have you seen Kimi?" I ask Dino since he was the first personal I saw when I ended into the F3 part of the Paddock.
"No, why would he be here?" Dino asks me laughing slighly at the panic in my voice.
"It's Kimi he ends up wherever he pleases," I respond back with a soft laugh falling from my lips making Dino nod in aggreeance.
"I'll catch you later! Good luck later," I call out to Dino as I speed walk away from the F2 paddock and towards the F1 paddock to try and find my best friend.
"Oh thank god, can you tell Kimi to come here," I say to George when I stop him outside of the Mercedes hospitality where he had told me Kimi was in there.
"Just come with me! I'm sure he's in his little drivers room," George tells me making me nod and follw him into the hosipitality where he found Kimi in his room.
"I need to talk to you, I'm freaking out," I tell him once I closed the door behind me.
"What's got you freaking out?" KImi asks as he set his phone down.
"I lied to Oillie, and now the lie is hitting me in the face," I reply back.
"Okay drop the cryptic messages you're not Taylor Swift what the fuck is going on?" Kimi asks clearly getting frustrated.
"I never told Ollie I was a virgin and I turn all his advances down but not he's convinced I don't want to be with him and I don't know how to fix this," I quickly tell Kimi while paces the small space.
"Just tell him. You have him stressed. Came in here acting the same fucking way. Like you guys were made for eahc other. Just be honest," Kimi tells me softly when we hear a knock on the door.
"Love, I know you're in there," Ollie calls out makig me look at Kimi with wide eyes not ready to tell him right in this moment.
"I got to go," Kimi says with a smirk getting out of bed and opening the door for Ollie and letting us have a moment alone.
"What's been going on?" Ollie asks getting straight to the point.
"Ollie I love you I swear and I want to be with you but I'm scared," I say softly making Ollie look at me with a raised brow clearly needing more information.
"I'm- I- I've never had sex and I thought I could keep it a secret from you but then everytime we get close to doing anything more than oral I freak out," I tell him softly while looking at my hands.
I feel Ollie step towards me and take my hands into his while he tells me to look at him.
"Love, I've known you were a virgin since the moment I touched you," Ollie admits softly making me look up at him with a raised brow.
"Why didn't you ever say anything?" I ask back making Ollie laugh a little.
"I think that's something you're supposed to tell me. I never wanted to push the subject but I couldn't have sex with you until you told me which is why I prentended to think you were lying to me about something," Ollie admits that this was all a set up basically.
"You set me up to admit that I was a virgin?" I ask with a raised brow making Ollie laugh and nod his head.
"It worked, didn't it. I'm in no way trying to rush sex, I just couldn't have sex with you until you admitted it. Now we can have a conversation about everything when the time comes," Ollie tells me softly while pulling me into his arms and placing a soft kiss on my lips.
"Soon," I respond back against his lips letting him know my timeline.
"There's no rush," Ollie responds back then places a kiss on my forehead.
Over the following few days I think about Ollie and I sleeping together more and more before I finally decided I was ready.
“Ollie I wanna do it tonight,” I tell him softly as we lay in his apartment.
“Are you sure? We’re in no kind of rush love,” Ollie tells me softly making me smile and nod my head.
“I’m ready and I wanna share that part of me with you,” I tell him softly making him smile.
“Tonight,” he tells me with a kiss to the forehead as we relax back into the couch and enjoy the random movie he had thrown on.
As the rest of the day passes I get progressively more nervous at the thought of sleeping with Ollie but there's a bigger part of me that's more excited.
When we climb into bed for the night I pull myself into Ollie's lap and start kissing his lips leading the way as much as my confidence will allow me.
"Are you sure you want me to take it baby?" Ollie asks as I start grinding down on his lap whimpering at the pleasure coursing through my body.
"Please Ollie! I only want it to be you," I tell him softly while stopping my grinding and looking Ollie in the eye.
"Okay, we'll go at your pace," Ollie tells me while pulling me back into another kiss while he starts pulling my shirt off leaving me in a pair of cotton panties.
"So beautiful," Ollie announces as he lets his eyes rake over my bare body.
"Ollie, please," I whine grinding down more feeling Ollie start to grow under me.
"Fuck, love," Ollie groans. I start pulling off Ollie's shirt with his help leaving him in just a pair of briefs.
Ollie flips us over leaving my back pressed against the mattress as Ollie is hoovering over me leaving wet kisses all over my neck and collarbones.
"Are you sure love?" Ollie confirms once again making me nod my head.
"Yes, I've never been so sure," I tell Ollie making him smile softly. This my final consent Ollie pulls off my panties and licks a strip from my dripping hole to my sensitive clit making me moan rather loudly when I feel his tongue graze my clit.
"Fuck, such a sweet little thing," Ollie says before he dives in and starts eating me out like a mad man.
"Fuck," I cry getting overwhelmed with the pleasure rather quickly. Ollie starts to slip 2 fingers deep into my pussy making me whimper at the stretch.
While Ollie and I had done a lot together feeling him slip his fingers into my pussy knowing he was soon gonna be slipping his cock into me the pleasure is far more overwhelming.
"Fuck, feel so good around my fingers," Ollie whispers while fingering me trying to prep me as much as possible to take his cock.
"I'm ready, please," I whine when I feel my orgasm start to build knowing I wanted to cum around Ollie's cock and not his fingers.
"Fuck, okay," Ollie says clearly showing some of his nerves.
"Oliver, love. Are you sure you are ready? You seem really nervous," I ask softly with a smile making Ollie look at me with hooded eyes.
"Yes, just don't want to hurt you," Ollie admits softly.
"Love, it's gonna hurt a bit no matter what, but I'm ready and I want you," I reassure once again while pulling him closer.
Ollie finally relaxes at my touch and starts to pull his boxers off.
"Fuck, baby I don't have any protection. I probably should have got some after our conversation a few days ago but I forgot. I can run to the corner store really quick," Ollie says once his boxers were pulled off.
"It's okay! I'm on birth control," I tell him softly while pulling him closer not caring about protection in this very moment.
"Ollie, I need it right now, please," I beg. Ollie just groans when he realizes how desperate I was.
"Fuck, okay," Ollie groans as he starts teasing my clit with his hard cock.
Seeing Ollie from this angle makes me realize how massive his cock truly is.
"Fuck, you're so big," I whine out when I feel the tip of his cock poking around my virgin hair.
"I'll be gentle I promise," Ollie grunts while slowly starting to push into me.
"Fuck Ollie," I cry out as the pain started to wash over him. Ollie completely stops all of his movements giving me some time to adjust before he starts pushing in again.
"Ollie," I whine when I feel him finally bottom out.
"Too big," I gasp trying to let my body relax.
"Look so pretty like this," Ollie groans out as he starts teasing my clit trying to get me to relax further so he could start rocking his hips.
"Fuck Ollie," I moan when the pain starts to fade and is replaced by an overwhelming pleasure. Ollie takes this as encouragement because he starts rocking his hips slowly trying to get me to adjust fulling to his size.
"Please, faster," I moan which instantly has Ollie thrusting into my soaked pussy while still teasing my clit.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck," I chant while growing closer to my orgasm.
“Fucking you so good you I can see myself in your tummy,” Ollie grunts out which has me looking down to see the bulge he had created in my tummy from his cock.
"Fuck Ollie, fucking massive," I moan while pushing down on the bulge in my tummy making the pleasure become overwhelming and instantly cumming all over Ollie's cock with a shout.
"Fuck," I cry while Ollie continues to fuck me through my orgasm.
Ollie starts slowing his thrusts down not wanting to overwhelm me which gives me an idea.
"I wanna ride you," I admit softly which has Ollie looking at me shocked.
"I'm serious Oliver, I want to ride your dick right now," I tell him seriously so he knows I want it.
"Fuck," Ollie grunts while softly slipping out of my soaked pussy and laying down on his back next to me. I climb into his lap and grind my soaked pussy on his hard cock watching as the pleasure starts coursing through his eyes. I lean up slightly while gripping his cock and angling it at my pussy before I slowly start to sink down.
"Fuck," I moan when I feel him stretching me out at a new angle.
"Fuck, feels so good," I moan when I'm fully seated on his cock with little to no pain.
"Awe I love to know I stretched you out just enough to take all my cock," Ollie grunts out as I start bouncing slightly on his cock.
"So good," I cry out as I start bouncing a bit faster as Ollie is thrusting up into me making the pleasure almost unbearable.
I continue fucking down onto his cock while he fucks up into my pussy bringing to closer to the edge again.
"Look so pretty riding my cock," Ollie grunts out which makes me start bouncing faster chasing my orgasm.
"Ollie, I'm close," I moan making Ollie lift my hips slightly and start thrusting into my pussy at a fast pace bringing me over the edge with a shout.
"Ollie," I moan while my legs instantly give out on me but Ollie holds me up and keeps fucking up into me.
"Fuck I'm close. Please, let me cum in you," Ollie grunts out making me look at him and nod softly.
"Cum in me Ollie, please. Wanna feel your cum deep in me," I say which instantly has Ollie's thrusts shudder slightly before he starts filling me up with his hot cum.
"Fuck," Ollie grunts while riding out his orgasm. Once he's started to come down he turns up over once again so he's hoovering over me before he slowly slips his cock out of me watching his cum start to leak from me.
"I love to watch my cum leak from your pretty pussy," Ollie says softly before leaning down and kissing me forehead and climbing out of the bed.
"Why are you leaving me?" I ask softy instantly getting upset with Ollie leaving.
"Just gonna get you some water and a rag to clean you up," Ollie tells me softly while leaning down and pulling me in for a quick kiss.
I watch Ollie disappear out of his bedroom and into another room to get me water while going into the bathroom after and grabbing a warm rag before coming back into the room and instantly wiping me down.
"I'm sorry," Ollie whispers when I whine at his touch clearly too overstimulated.
"I love you Ollie," I tell him softly when he climbs back into the bed.
"I love you too," Ollie replies back pulling me into his chest and letting me relax into his warm embrace.
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