#didnt even realize what i was doing
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I NEED TO UNPACK SOME THINGS I NEED TO UNPACK SOME THINGS OHHHHH NOOOOO
#getting caught last night lying with a very stern 'i dont want you to to do that'#didnt even realize what i was doing#didnt even process that i didnt want to do it#not like in a bad way. i wasnt forcing myself#just didnt have any interest in doing it#my therapist says its good that i can sit with that discomfort which i know is true#im just embarrassed that i did it i guess#and it was noticeable#but clem has always been observant#it was nice and not nice to hear 'i don't want you to do that'#clem just scares me sometimes#not actually#just with his ability to act healthily#and ive been so good at setting and maintaining boundaries especially around sex#so its frustrating that I still have blind spots#but i know about this one now at least#just worried this reflects poorly on me and my ability to be a partner#but my therapist also said that me being in a long term relationship is a green flag for clem#and ive been beating myself up pretty hard for how i acted but i really shouldnt#just trying to be very above board with it all and healthy and im worried i cant? but i should trust me with me i guess#long post oh no
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These were meant to be warmups. ANYWHO!
Went to a random palette site and picked ones that were reminiscent of Wally's colors but still very different that I liked and grabbed some outfits to do a sort of challenge for myself. Idk, thought it would help me out of my funk.
Suffice to say, I'm feeling a bit better now~ These were really fun to do!!!
#welcome home#welcome home puppet show#wally darling#welcome home arg#WH Wally#welcome home wally#wally darling fanart#welcome home fanart#welcome home puppet arg#my art#Waaawwwyyy in a dreessss#Drawing the man to heal my soul#The top one feels so different from what I'm used to!!#Im usually so set on keeping my art soft but man doing something like this was kinda fun!!!#SHOUT OUT TO THEKNIFECLOWN for letting me steal their fit for the second piece!!!!!#limited colors also meant Wallys stuck with blue eyelids but ngl I find the blue so cute. A part of Wally's beta design I really really lik#Anyway its 5am and shoulda been in bed...AGES ago!!!#enjoy enjoy#sidenote please ignore that i just drew the same expression twice fjsjkdd god I didnt even REALIZE!!!!!
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graph
bonus:
#xmen#xmen comics#magneto#is this the part where i have to tag everyone because everyone actually is like. semi significant in these. sure JVAELKVJEALK#cyclops#jean gray#beast#iceman#angel#warren worthington iii#hank mccoy#bobby drake#toad#mortimer toynbee#snap sketches#welcome back to Finally Drawing Months-Old Ideas VJELVKJAEKL#I Repeat love how you can tell what comics ive been reading based on what i draw like No Shit but still... lol ...#this comic is so niche but so is most of my stuff jVELAKJA I MADE THIS FOR MEEEE#it has my kids it has toad it has magneto being Unnecessary. this is for ME. also charlie lookin darlin but thats normal anyway#also hi remember how i was complaining about colors from my tablet some days ago.#i didnt realize the 'protective eye' setting was on. which yk makes the screen tinted yellow#LIKE I SAID OUT LOUD TO MY BROTHER 'lol my screen's yellowish' AND IT DIDNT CLICK#i only realized it was on when i went to turn it on at night one night and i was like. Oh 🧍��️#anyways. sillies. all the kids....#see i thought i was gonna post this WAY earlier but as i was finishing the first version i. well i changed the last panel like three times#but even then i was like 'ok but i wanna draw the boys bein silly..' and indecisive as i was with which version i wanted#i . drew both. and have just made this a goofy two parter or whatever#ANYWAYS !!!! its great bein able to do personal stuff again ... i still have work this to do but its significantly less#so i feel more at ease to do small stuff like this#i do hope to tackle a bigger idea this month tho. while i was drawin this out all i could think of was That idea
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little miss sandy milkovich hearing for the first time about how her older cousin mickey milkovich came out big style in front of the whole family, announcing hes gay and fighting side by side with his boyfriend against red neck neo nazi biggest homophobic on earh uncle terry and how that changed her life forever
#can u guys even imagine?#i like to think this is what made her realize she didnt need to live the life she was trapped in and pushed her to quit her bf + motherhood#like 'mickey did it i can do it too' moment#gay milkoviches unite!!!#sandy milkovich#mickey milkovich#shameless#shameless us#og.#att. omg this is a hit? why did i even kept this in my drafts for so long#i guess theres probably some grammatical errors but idc english is not my first languague and u guys get the gist
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imigane clover ever letting slip how fucked they family life was and ceroba just being mortified
the gang ends up on the local news
#my art#monster clover au#undertale yellow#starlo uty#ceroba ketsukane#martlet uty#clover uty#i think clovers parents were neglectful and strict based off of canon hints so thats kind of what im going for here!!#they neglected their house and their kid and expected clover to fend for themselves#and yet expect them to do everything and follow their rules#so its weird for them to actually. have reliable adults#(even if those adults… did try to kill them at first and let them kill themselves and didnt stop them but you know. everyone has flaws!!)#(theyre getting better at being adults LMAOO)#ALSO I JUST REALIZED I COVERED THE PANEL OF MARTLET FIXING THE ROOF SO U CANT TELL WHATS GOING ON?!??!#im too lazy to fix it. but im mad i covered it up#mcau comic#mcau art
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i've had these scenarios written down since volo's debut in pokemon masters and i just really wanted to scribble them down and finally release them
#pokemon#volo#pokemon volo#pokemon jacq#n harmonia#pokemon rei#trainer rei#clai's art#trying to write n's specific brand of being mean is hard to me for some reason#in the initial idea i had him outright call volo stupid but i didnt know if that was too far so i just took it out BJFBFJF#but anyway volo being a historian who had to have studied many walks of life but has still come to the conclusion that the world is hopeless#jacq being someone who's very positive and sees the best in people even if they are very much not great to him (see: raifort)#finally realizing someone he knows is like. inexcusably horrible#n's situation wasn't even that different from volo's. both saw injustice in society and sought to change it#but even n. who hated humanity for what he thought they were all responsible for. didnt want humans to Die for what they did!!#and rei. rei was a scared kid who saw the very worst of volo firsthand. rei needed friends and one of them despised him in the end#isnt it soooo funny how volo thinks he's alone yet keeps pushing away all the people who want to connect with him :) i hate pla so much :)))#as another note too. perhaps the rei thing could end in two ways#satisfying good ending where it kicks off volo's realization that hey maybe people do trust me unconditionally#or no good bad ending where volo takes this as another betrayal. rei only liked him for his facade like everyone else so why does it matter#volo almost makes me feel as ill as n does. hate this stupid guy i shouldnt have bought pla for my birthday i should have gotten. p/kmin idk
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"why don't you want him to know how much you love him?" "that's a little personal. he knows." "uh-huh."
#interview with the vampire#iwtv#armand#the vampire armand#loumand#louis de pointe du lac#daniel molloy#alice molloy#must preface that NOBODY IS ALLOWED TO USE THIS FOR LDPDL HATE PURPOSES#even though louis (well both of them lbr) clearly had communication and commitment issues#armand directed a play that would KILL louis all because he was self conscious that louis didn't love him enough#anyway this is just one interpretation of the 'alice rejected daniel's proposal' convo scene#cause i see soo many people ask 'why did armand say all that' (and have wondered so myself)#even though we cant rule out the possibility that devil's minion happened in the past and that this was armandaniel history tease#armand could be projecting his choice re: louis and the trial onto alice's choice here#similar to how daniel was projecting his feelings about paris onto claudia in this same episode#i just think this would make sense thematically w armand's arc this season#(ie revealing what a deeply insecure and selfish and fucked up lover he is under his guise as a 500 yo devoted and caring husband)#armand 🤝 lestat: i will love you and i will hurt you. if i cant have you then i will break you#[plays under your spell by desire] whats the difference between love and obsession and desire? do you think this feeling could last forever#c.txt#mine#'she didnt think she could trust you' sounds like a YOU problem buddy#and then armand realizes he was wrong too late and bro was SCRAMBLING#the start of something beautiful aka failmarriage!!! :D
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[OLD ART ALERT] A COLLECTION OF SCENES FROM THE GILLIONS CATSCRATCH ARC THAT BROUGHT ME GREAT JOY. i love fishy chips especially when its just gillion being delirious and violent and hostile
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi riptide#jrwi riptide spoilers#JUST NOTICED A MILLION MISTAKES FUUUUUUUUCK BUT WWHATEVERRRRR IF I STARE AT THIS ANYMORE IM GONNA HHUURRRLLL#SO I REALLY LIKE FISH AND CHIPS RIGHT. IVE BEEN IN LOVE W THE SHIP EVER SINCE THAT NAT 20 KISS#BUT I THINK I SHIP IT WRONG. OR LIKE. I AM CORRECT BUT EVERYONE SHIPS THEM DIFFERENTLY#THE FISH N CHIPS I SEE EVERYWHERE ELSE IS SO FLOWERY AND SWEET AND ROMANTIC. AND THATS NICE! THAT STUFFS NEAT#but gillion and chip would NEVERRRR enter anything similar to a romantic relationship. chips too damaged and gillions too uninterested#I LIKE MY FISH N CHIPS ONE SIDED AS FUCK#bc 2 gillion chip is his best friend in the whole wide world but hes also kinduvagross little man that took him a MINUTE to really warm up2#but to CHIP gillion is this powerful and gorgeous and heroic paragon of destiny and his best friend in the whole world who will#bring about the eschaton. 'i didnt believe in destiny until i met you' until i met a champion radiating with a light thatll alter the world#OHH REMEMBER THE FIRST ICE ARENA?he was so mad.still probably shaking from the ordeal.NEVER had he felt true divine radiance CLEAVE through#his SOUL like that.do you remember that moment in the forest w the bugs. an alien from the ocean; lacerating the land w lightning#when the realization flickered in chip for a moment.that the thing standing before him was more powerful than he could ever fathom#remember when grizz mentioned that the nat20 kiss was the 'best kiss chip ever experienced'. that has nothing to do w this. where was i.#LOST MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT. BUT HEY. I THINK at the beginning chip absolutely knew that gill was smth grand n powerful n scary#when gillion revealed what exactly the prophecy was;chip got defensive and mad.sure he was sleep deprived but OOH. HES SCARED!#he believes gillion too! he believes that his destiny is to eradicate either the sea or land and that scares him!#but then he gets past it bc ultimately he trusts his bestfriend gillion so so much. he fuckin loves this dude.#he would throw himself intothe path of fire for this dude. he would boat across the ocean for this dude.he would build arenas for this dude#even if this dude will end half the world.even if this dude wields the power and the obligation to eradicate him at any second.#even if this dude is going to throw himself into harms way for his own comrades.even if this dude is just going to sacrifice himself.#one way or another one shall die for the other.these self-sacrificial bastards click so well with eachother!!#chip believes his body is best used to pave roads and gill believes his body is destined to pave prosperity.WHATEVER!!#i really love their dynamic!! they care for eachother so much!in MY heart tho. the icing on the cake here is the fantasy that chip is#just a bit more In Love w gillion than he realizes. like this powerful fish guy is HOT and PRETTY and KIND and FUNNY and LOYAL and STRONG#but gillion would never rly feel that same sort of attraction towards chip. its just not rly his thing. aroace as fuck man.#thats how it is in MY little heart atleast. and i sit here and play w my touys in my brain n i explore my silly lil one sided fish y chips.
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I will say this once because I'm tired of seeing stupid discourse: anti-transmasculinity is not about being treated bad because we clock as men, it's about being treated as stupid little girls because transphobes think we've been tricked into this.
It's kind of the opposite of transmisogyny- instead of fear and revulsion, it's constant condescension, the implications that we've been whisked away from femininity by scary bad guys, that we're going to cause 'irreparable damage' because we don't know what's best for ourselves, somehow. People fearmonger a lot about the "ugliness" of transfem people, but for transmasc people that 'ugliness' is used as a warning- you'll look like THIS! You'll go BALD! Your top surgery scars will leave you MUTILATED! A lot of aesthetic concerns. Worry about our 'beauty'. Because it comes from that same stupid reactionary 'we gotta SAVE the WOMEN' shit, but this time they have to save them from getting 'stolen away', as if we're being seduced or pressured into this. As if we can't make our own decisions.
For TERFS specifically, they're losing one of their own. We're 'gender traitors', willingly aligning ourselves with the half of the population they consider unilaterally dangerous and evil.
We aren't REALLY trans, we just want the benefits that men get. You don't actually want to transition, you're just trying to avoid misogyny.
You aren't actually a man, you're just a self-loathing lesbian.
Why can't you just be a butch girl? Why can't you just be a tomboy?
Why can't you just be something that I don't think is icky?
Anyway. Like all things, it boils down to misogyny. Women stupid and gentle, dont know what best for them, evil men trick into taking man juice, must save because lady stupid and dont know what best for them (having babies and being Feminine).
Theres like. Obviously more to this but I'm just a Transmasc Rando explaining this from my perspective, and I'm not the best with words. Anyone is free to hop in and add on to this
#long post#transphobia#spitblaze says things#anti-transmasculinity#several disclaimers#i do not think misandry is real.#i think stigmatization of masculinity is real with a lot of women and terfs specifically#i think a lot of people whether they know it or not consider men to be inherently 'bad'#i think men are very often treated as emotionless and 'tough' by default which causes a lot of issues#but thats not anywhere near the level of misogyny. its a separate issue and not related#im not trying to say that trans men somehow have it 'worse' than trans women?? what would thay even accomplish. this isnt a pissing contest#and even if it was I'd lose#and my wording isnt the best bc this is a Midnight Rant and not a scholarly article#if you want to pick a fight about semantics consider that theres a good chance that i genuinely didnt realize what i said#anyway uh. yeah. this discourse is dumb i cant belive its happening#and i especially cant belive how bad people are at articulating the actual point of the matter#(not that im one to talk lmao)#doin numbers
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anyone remember that pyro is a robot headcanon? yeah um erm i also remembered that and also sorta maybe mightve gotten carried away a little bit.. tee hee..
#fanart#art#doodle#tf2#tf2 fanart#team fortress 2#tf2 scout#comic#tf2 engineer#tf2 spy#tf2 soldier#its so funny because it didnt even cross my mind until i was drawing (GET READY FOR CRINGE)…#..scout with bunny ears.. ANYWAYS AHEM. i was like. hey. what if. what if those ears. were like. apart of a helmet.#and then i spiraled#hashtag real#hopefully this comic makes sense i stayed up to do this not realizing the time i am so eepy#this is probably also a blue headcanon i headcanon blu engie is medic levels of unhinged <3#to the person in the replies: YES!! you have full permission to draw him!! thank you for asking in the first place that’s so sweet of you!!#but anyways sorry for not replying! this is my side account that i’ve turned into a main account#and my main account still has the Mark of cringe past (old fanart) so i’m trying to keep them apart lol#scoutbot
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i see we are talking about pete's little "let's twist the knife again" spin from albany <3
#pete wentz#fall out boy#fobalbany#my show#i didnt even realize at the time that patrick was doing.... what he was doing at this part i was so focused on pete LMAO </3
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Everybody has the theory that Armand turns Daniel out of anger; but my theory is that Daniel gets injured, or has like a heart attack or something (the guy is old and has parkinson's, and Louis was trashing his house okay?) and Armand is SCARED AF and ends up turning him out of fear of Daniel dying, like in the books.
And then Armand immediately regrets it, and nopes the fuck out of there; and instead of the Devil's Minion where we had Armand following Daniel, we will have Daniel searching for Armand.
Just think of it, it would be a nice comparison to the book.
#amc iwtv#iwtv hell thoughts#iwtv#amc interview with the vampire#armand#armand iwtv#daniel molloy#devils minion#like yeah#my theory is that Daniel gets on the verge of death and Armand is like “oh shit oh fuck”#so he turns Daniel out of despair and fear#like#“what if Louis blames me”“what if he dies and I never told him my story”#so he goes and turns him and after he realizes what he did so he's “oh shit oh fuck” again#and doesn't even know if he's gonna survive like Nikki or if he just created a monster and instantly regrets it#because he did the one thing he said he didnt want to do#and he runs because what else can you do when all your life has basically been destroyed#he doesn't want to face Louis or Daniel#and that's why Daniel asks Louis if he has heard anything about Armand because poor bastard was turned and abandoned#and being the reporter he is he will try to search for Armand
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thinking about john n davesprite n dave what happens when he finds out its not just a bird dave thing but a dave thing..... the idea hes built up of The Real Dave comes crashing down
like things were def made worse by being stuck together for 3 years with noone else n all of the extra issues davesprite has On top of all the normal dave bs but like, fuuuckkkkkkk
#and like#i havent touched hs2 in ages but just thinking about any post canon thats based on the canon end be it hs2 or not#john interacting with dave#davesprite was the dave he was with for 3 years#the First dave he met...#do you think he thinks about him?#sees davesprites mannerisms in dave#n realizing what a pedestal hed put dave on compared 2 davesprite cus he hadnt seen daves issues up close n personal#years later looking back#after maybe even learning about some of the details of daves fucked up home situation#having the context for some of ds behavior#he was just a kid....#he was the only beta kid not to make it....#i just remembered jasprose n was like.. hmm idk if id count her since she shows up so late BUT#SHE DID MAKE IT#ok now im even more upset..... he truly was the only one of them... the one who gave up his identity....... TWICE(counting davepeta as 1#N THEY DIDNT EVEN MAKE IT SO LIKE)#i am going insane#i am thinking violent thoughts#davesprite#rambles
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horrible realization
debate over whether a nonhuman creature can be human or if it's just a creature, whether or not it's capable of being kind
the protagonist going "NOPE they are all awful and I will run them through with my weapon. any display of humanity from them is just acting"
unbeknownst to the protagonist, they ARE one of these non-human creatures- well, not really, not anymore, but there's a side of them currently being suppressed who was one of the beings that they're very gung-ho about taking down
could you call that inhuman? is it so wrong to want to live?
limbus company canto 7 is kingdom hearts 2
#kingdom hearts#kh2#project moon#limbus company#canto vii spoilers#limbus company spoilers#sora#roxas#don quixote#GAHHH FUCK#I COMPARED BLOODFIENDS TO NOBODIES EARLIER AND I DIDNT EVEN REALIZE#WHAT DON QUIXOTE IS DOING WITH BLOODFIENDS IS JUST WHAT SORA DID WITH NOBODIES#me post#nobodies
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for the art requests thing - i would looove to see your take on a phantom of the opera style papa V with a half face mask!
:-]
i am so bad at character design but ill take any excuse to combine my favourite things
#yes behind him is the fucking “twin” vs “cooler twin” meme#I ALSO DIDNT KNOW WHAT COLOUR TO MAKE HIM like this made me realize i genuinely have no idea what i think this guy will look like#BUT the one detail i do actually like that U CANT EVEN SEE in this drawing is. his nose paint is a V shape. get it#and yes its also meant to mimic when copia originally had the two lines on his nose#idk what this outfit is though its just. phantom meets cardinal i DUNNO it was fun!!!!!!!!#i did a few variations of this and in one of them his mask has horns bc it reminds me of the prequelle ghoul masks#THANK U FOR THE REQ SORRY IM SO SLOW....#papa emeritus v#ghost bc#my art#asks
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Me: I hate all superhero movies/shows that boil down to 'it's Superman but an Asshole' they al-
Megamind 2010: all?
Me: oh no not you, you're perfect.
#superman#clark kent#megamind#metroman#megamind 2010#comics#dc comics#`if i was superman id use my powers to enslave humanity' yeah but superman wouldn't YOU would because apparently you're a horrible person#metro man#roxanne ritchi#like metro man is superman if he was forced to be a hero from a young age and became dissolutioned with it#and megamind is Superman if he looked alien and didnt land in a nice place to grow up.#they both go through the motions of hero and villain because thats what's expected of them. in the end they realize thats not what they wan#metro man stepped down and megamind stepped into his shoes to defeat the villain (even if its of his own creation)#how did DreamWorks do this? eveyone does `Superman but.... wait for it! EVIL` but they did it so much better like neiter metroman or#megamind was really evil. megamind was a nusence at best. even durimg his dictator era the city was still ok. a fire truck in a wall and#spray paint. some thievery one guy got cubed. blew up the museum. etc but he could have done worse. he wasnt truly evil just mad scientist#the real evil was the 'nice guy' who got powers and automatically used them to to an actual dictator when the girl he liked rejected him
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