#It was fun but I don't know how much I was able to show my thought into small details so it's just a good art :]

[district4loading]

Twice's Tour Chronicles (WLW)

Twice x Twice : Sana!dom x Dahyun!sub | Jihyo!dom x Tzuyu!sub | Nayeon!dom x Momo!dom x Mina!sub

6K Words

Content Warning: smut, threesome, member x member, toys, face riding, oral

Minors DNI

A/N: The person that asked for the twice members shower situation requested that I continued the scenario so here it is. This is my first time doing member x member stuff but it was fun and I can't wait to do some more of it.

Enjoy!!

-

"Okay, I'll say it since no one else will"

Jeongyeon starts off, looking around the room to make sure that all eyes are on her, including the managers and the staff "If the driver is going to take another hour to get here, we might as well kill the time by showering here"

The statement gets mixed reactions. Sana's the first one to twist herself in Dahyun's lap and say "Yeah, I'm in desperate need of a shower right now." There's a few other girls that nod and hum in agreement while some others are hesitant to give a proper response or even acknowledge it.

The girls are backstage at the MetLife Stadium and they just finished performing a show that will probably go down in history as one of their best. Usually, they'd be on their way back to the hotel by now but unfortunately the van that's supposed to pick them up had some mechanical issues. Meaning that their ride is delayed for another hour as Jeongyeon said.

Manager-unnie crosses her arms and stops to think for a bit as the girls watch her silently. "There should be a communal shower just down the hall. I'll check to see if we'll be able to use it"

Dahyun winces a bit when she hears the word "communal" and Sana's the first to notice it. "It's fine I'll just shower when I get back to the hotel" Dahyun shrugs her shoulders.

Tzuyu and Mina nod along with a hum "Me too" The taller girl insists.

Sana slides out of Dahyun's lap "but you hate being sweaty" She says it in that cute little voice of hers and it sounds innocent but if anyone knows Sana, they'd know it's far from it.

"Yeah but.. communal showers aren't my thing you know. It'll be weird"

"It's going to be fine..." Sana leans into Dahyun's ear and says something that nobody else can hear.

Momo and Nayeon watch the two of them and the older girl just catches the way that Momo rolls her eyes "Those two might as well just kiss" she mutters, causing Nayeon to laugh and playfully tap her arm.

"How do you feel about this communal showers thing?" Nayeon questions her.

Momo only shrugs "I just wanna get clean honestly"

So like the strong leader she is, Jihyo gets everyones attention "We've all seen each other naked before, it's really no big deal if we shower together" She looks at the members who are still unsure, although it's looking like Dahyun is about to change her mind with the way Sana has her smiling now.

"Fine" Tzuyu looks at Mina for a moment "I need a shower too, I don't think I can wait"

Then it doesn't take much convincing for Mina to shrug her shoulders and say "Fuck it"

-

So there they are, naked in the communal showers trying to get clean. Chaeyoung really only minds her business and so does Tzuyu, Jihyo and Dahyun because they're more focused on the way the warm water soothes their skin and their sore muscles.

But Mina, no matter how much she tries can't stop sneaking looks at Momo and Nayeon who are to her left and right. All she has to do is turn her head a little bit and she can't help herself when she allows herself to stare at their breasts or the perfect curve of their ass. She's embarrassed by it and she can feel her cheeks burn red the moment she locks eyes with Nayeon.

She turns her head away to face forwards when she suddenly feels someones presence next to her. It's Momo and she's snaking her arms around Mina's waist "Momo, what are you-" She gasps, feeling her nails dig into her skin.

"I thought I'd come over here since you wouldn't stop looking my way"

Momo looks over to Nayeon and winks, beckoning her to come over as well. So she does and now poor little Mina is practically cornered by these two vixens. Nayeon puts a hand on Mina's breast while Momo kisses on her neck. The younger girl closes her eyes, not knowing what the hell she's gotten herself into.

She's being fondled by two people at once and no matter how much she whines their names, she knows she wants more.

Meanwhile Sana's sneaking up behind an unsuspecting Dahyun who almost yelps when she feels a pair of small hands grab her ass. "That's not funny" She huffs to Sana who only giggles and wraps her arms around the younger girls body. "Seriously" Dahyun tries not to smile but it's prevalent in her tone and the subtle quiver on her lips.

"Aw c'mon Dahyunnie, you know I can't stay away from you for more than a minute"

Their wet bodies are completely flush together, smooth wet skin against smooth wet skin. "So clingy" Dahyun taps her arm "If you want me to help you shower then just say that"

Jeongyeon holds in a laugh and turns to Jihyo "Hey, leader. Aren't you gonna do something? The members are about to fuck"

The acclaimed leader only snorts "If I get involved, we all might end up unable to look into each others eyes for the rest of the tour" Then she finds herself staring at whatever Momo, Mina and Nayeon have going on across the room.

"I'm sure Mina and Nayeon won't mind if you steal Momo away from them for a moment" Jeongyeon shrugs, her words causing Jihyo's cheeks to burn.

She turns over "I was not staring at Momo"

It's very unconvincing the way she says it because it sounds like she's trying to convince herself of that more that she's trying to convince Jeongyeon. "I didn't say you were I just-"

"Just what?" The leader snaps

"Nothing" Jeongyeon tries to hold in a laugh, figuring that maybe she shouldn't try to open that can of worms again.

Chaeyoung looks over to Tzuyu "See, I could've predicted that this would happen"

"What?"

"Sana and Dahyun.. Mina between Nayeon and Momo... I saw it happening" She shrugs causing Tzuyu to laugh a bit "When we get back to the hotel I wouldn't be surprised if some of them spent the night together"

"I've only been looking, I don't think I could bring myself to actually.." She trails off but the older girl catches the drift and nods.

It's something that the youngest has thought about a few times, although she'd never actually act on anything. She was too shy and too awkward to do so. As opposed to Chaeyoung, who didn't really have any interest in hooking up with the members. But she wasn't one to judge, in fact she says "You should try it out"

Tzuyu only shakes her head and continues to scrub her body, feeling herself turn red at just the thought of...

-

"Jihyo-unnie!" The leader hears the familiar voice of the one and only maknae echoing loud in the hallway of the hotel. She turns around to see none other than Tzuyu walking past the door to her own room and straight to her.

Jihyo's immediately curious, stopping to look at Tzuyu with her arms crossed "What's up?" 

"Can we talk?" Jihyo nods, then waits for the youngest to speak "In private" Tzuyu clarifies.

First Jihyo's a bit hesitant but she reaches for the door knob and she opens it anyways. As Twice's leader she knows every one of her members inside and out. So she'll always keep her door open if a member is in need of any guidance or anything of the sort.

They both sit next to each other on the edge of the bed and Jihyo notices that Tzuyu's not looking her in the eye. So she starts things off "Whats on your mind Tzu?" She tilts her head, placing her hand on the younger girls thigh. It wasn't anything more than a simple act of assurance to get her comfortable and Tzuyu knows that. Still, her ears burn red from the contact.

"I..." She swallows and turns to meet the leaders eyes "Have you ever uh... like.." Jihyo nods along, holding eye contact intensely a bit worried about the girl in fronr of her. Tzuyu takes a deep breath, noticing how pathetic she seems not being able to form a proper sentence "Have you ever been with one of the members. Like sexually?" She blurts the words out, although the question wasn't really necessary.

Everyone knew that Jihyos been with Momo and she's gotten with Sana too. She asked it to get the conversation going so she can make a move.

Jihyo just chuckles, relaxing the tensions in her body once she realizes what this is about "I mean.. yeah. Why?"

"I think I'm... curious about it but I don't know. I've never been with a girl before" Tzuyu admits, breaking eye contact before she can even finish her sentence.

"So who are you interested in? I could maybe help you set something up with her" 

Tzuyu only smiles, her cheeks turning red as she looks at Jihyo, putting her hand over hers that's on her thigh "How about you show me the ropes first. Then we can talk about the others" Somehow she's able to smoothen out her tone when she says it, sounding a little bit more confident.

Jihyo's eyes widen, she wasn't expecting this at all. "Tzu... are you sure?"

"Y..Yeah" Tzuyu nods reluctantly, finding Jihyo's surprise a little discouraging.

Jihyo holds Tzuyu's chin, forcing her to look her in the eye "I want you to be completely 100% sure about it first, show me that confidence again"

"I want to" Tzuyu looks into her eyes when she says it, causing Jihyo to give her a satisfied smile. Her hand moves to caress Tzuyu's soft cheek and she just has to admire the younger girl's face a bit. 

She's beautiful.

"Can I kiss you?" Jihyo asks softly and Tzuyu nods immediately.

So Jihyo leans in, eager to get her lips on Tzuyu's. The maknae doesn't waste any time to reciprocate the kiss. She moves her lips nice and slow against Jihyo's, allowing herself to taste and smudge the lipgloss that's on her lips. 

As things heat up, Tzuyu finds herself moaning softly into Jihyo's mouth. The pretty sounds she makes on her lips causes the leader to feel a familiar heat inside of her body. Jihyo begins to kiss her harder and a bit faster, saliva finding it's way at the corners of the girls' lips and sliding down their chins.

There's nothing like a good make-out session to Jihyo. She could spend a good while doing it. Especially when she feels Tzuyu's hands wandering to where she's always wanted them to be in the first place. Tzuyu cups Jihyo's full breasts in her hands, feeling how soft they are, just like she thought they'd be. 

Jihyo's hands deviate too, slipping underneath Tzuyu's T-shirt to hold and feel the skin on her slim waist. The sounds of the smacking of their lips and their eager moans fill the warm lit room room as they grow hungrier for each other. 

She tugs at the hem of Tzuyu's top and they have to break the kiss for the first time to get it off. Tzuyu bites her lip, already missing the taste of Jihyo's when she begins to take off her own top. She can't help but look at the leaders breasts and how they nearly burst out of her bra, it's got her cheeks hot. Jihyo giggles as she reaches back to unclasp her bra "You can touch them if you'd like" She offers welcomingly with a smirk.

Tzuyu hesitates a bit but then her hands reach out to touch them. She holds them both in her hands and they feel much better, warmer and even softer without clothes over them. "Can... can I suck them?" The curiosity in Tzuyu's tone has Jihyo nearly swooning because she's so unbearably cute and endearing.

"Go ahead" She nods and Tzuyu scoots forwards, ducking her head down to get the nipple in her mouth. Jihyo moans softly, the sensitivity her nipples harbor only enhances the pleasure for her. It's obvious Tzuyu's never done this before, the way she's moving her tongue and sucking feels so amateur in the cutest way possible.

So Jihyo giggles, allowing her to explore and do her own thing until she's ready to stop. Soon she comes up "Now what?" Tzuyu asks and Jihyo has to sit and think a bit before she scoots further onto the bed, then spreads her legs and taps the spot in front of her.

"Come sit here" Jihyo smiles warmly. Tzuyu does as she's told, then and she presses her back against Jihyo. "Let me help you take these off" She offers, tugging and pulling at the waistband of her sweats so she lifts her hips and helps get them all the way off. "Can I touch you here?" 

Tzuyu nods "Yes, please" as Jihyo kisses along her neck, fingers ghosting over her underwear.

"So Tzu... how come all of a sudden you're interested in me"

"Well-" A soft moan stops her mid sentence when Jihyo puts some actual pressure on her panties "Well, I saw that Dahyun and Sana and the others were having a good time. I got curious" She shrugs, causing Jihyo to hum in response.

"But why'd you choose me?"

"I thought you were the most trustworthy, you know me the most"

Jihyo smiles as she slides Tzuyu's panties to the side, running the tip of her finger up her slit. From the feel of it, just a bit of kissing and nipple play has got Tzuyu all dripping and ready for her leader. It boosts her confidence through the roof.

She hears a small little whine come from the younger girl when she begins to circle her clit "How does that feel?" Jihyo mutters against her skin soft skin.

"Good" She hums, then spreads her legs a bit wider to give better access. Without another word, Jihyo slides two whole fingers inside of Tzuyu's aching heat, hearing a loud moan escape her lips full of pleasure and surprise. "Ah- Jihyo" She has to shush the younger a bit as she begins to glide her fingers in and out, curling them perfectly for her.

"You're so wet, just look how easy it's going in and out" Jihyo whispers, looking over Tzuyu's shoulder. Tzuyu looks down also, unable to take her eyes off the sight in front of her. Something tells her that she should be embarrassed because just look at her, a moaning and squirming mess on Jihyo's fingers and she's only just started.

But it feels too good for her to have any sort of shame. Right now there's only pleasure and she's absolutely drunk with it. "Please- Jihyo right there" She sobs, eyes threatening to roll back each time Jihyo buries her fingers to the hilt.

When Tzuyu woke up this morning, this isn't how she envisioned the following night going. Like always she'd keep to herself and stay in her room to recharge after a long concert. Instead she's in Jihyo's room getting fingered and fondled with her head in the clouds. Each squeeze of her petite breasts gets her gushing and when Jihyo kisses her neck so sweetly it's almost too much.

"What was that Tzu?" Jihyo sinks her teeth into the younger girl's neck, then licks over her red teeth marks "Go on, tell me how it feels" Jihyo hums, noticing the stutter in each breath she takes in. Jihyo says the words so slowly, her voice deep and soulful like she means it and God Tzuyu's mind just fucking breaks.

"I- It's so fucking good... fuck- how are you doing that?" She moans, turning her head towards Jihyo the best she can for some answers. Tzuyu can't understand it at all, how Jihyo can get her like this just with two of her fingers. No guy she's been with could ever make her feel pleasure so intense and earth-shattering that she can't even focus on making her moans sound pretty. They're labored and broken but Jihyo likes it that way, she likes her this way.

Then Jihyo's hand slides down from Tzuyu's breast and she brings it to the throbbing bud that's begging for attention. She slaps it, not once, but twice and with each one Tzuyu's entire body jerks "Again" she nods. It's the first time that she's said something with so much conviction so far. "Fuck!" She squeals when Jihyo does it a bit harder this time, then she rubs it to ease the pain.

"I would've never pegged you to be the type to like being slapped down there" Jihyo snickers so arrogantly, like she knows how badly she's fucking this poor girl up tonight. 

Tzuyu doesn't respond, she just can't. Not when both of Jihyo's hands are doing all the right things. She tries to move because the pleasure's got her close but Jihyo's strong arms are constricting her, holding her in place so that the only thing she can do right now is take it. "Jihyo" It comes out as a helpless and breathy whisper "I'm almost there" The warning is pleading, like she needs her to take her to the finish line so badly.

"Yeah?" Jihyo nods 

Tzuyu nods back, moaning a louder "Yeah" back as she turns to face her the best she can. Jihyo can tell what she needs right now, there's no need to ask for it. So she leans and cranes her neck the best she can to get their lips together. She swallows all of the maknae's moans, kissing her nice and slow as she gets her to the point of no return.

She hums a sweet and encouraging "mm-hm" on the other girls lips right when her body begins shaking.

And with a particularly loud and hoarse moan Tzuyu cums all over Jihyo's fingers, her cunt helplessly clenching and pulsing around them. At this point she's stopped kissing back and Jihyo's the one doing all the work, fucking her through her orgasm as she sucks and bites on her lips. 

It's all so worth it to make Tzuyu fall apart on her fingers.

-

So there they are, laying in bed together after Tzuyu timidly requested to stay the night. She lays in Jihyo's arms a little exhausted and weak from their activities. "Next time can I try topping?" Jihyo only laughs for a moment because it's the first words she's said since they decided to ask. When she hears it, her ears go red "I'm sorry, I was just saying what I was thinking"

Jihyo runs her hand through her hair "No Tzu don't be sorry. You're just cute" She breathes in a bit and she smiles warmly "Yeah, I'll let you top me"

"You'll have to teach me" She clears her throat, the embarrassment starts flooding in. Being this inexperienced at her age, feeling all the things Jihyo made her feel for the first time tonight--it all made her feel like she's missing out on the better parts of life and now she's hoping that Jihyo will be patient with her.

"We'll take things slow, I won't rush you into anything" Jihyo assures her, pulling her in closer for comfort. 

It's just peaceful when they fall asleep in each others arms.

-

Sana and Dahyun were all over each other getting to the hotel, they decided to stop by the open bar downstairs to maybe get a few drinks. 

On their way back, Sana's naughty giggles could be heard from all the way down the hall as she fiddled with the lock to the younger members room. Once they make it inside, Sana wastes no time to press the smaller girl up against the nearest wall. She presses their lips together once, then twice "I think I'm obsessed with you" Sana mutters on Dahyun's lips as she reaches for the buttons on her jeans.

"You think?" Dahyun suppresses a moan as Sana dips her head into her neck, kissing and licking on the soft and pale skin "No marks" she winces when the brown haired girl attacks her skin a little too rough with her mouth. 

She doesn't respond, only shoves her hand into Dahyun's panties, getting a feel of the wet warmth she's been harboring the entire ride back to the hotel. "Oh- looks like someones been ready for me a while" Sana smirks, kissing her once more as she circles her cunt.

Like the tease she is, she slips her hand out and places her sticky fingers into her mouth, humming erotically at the sweet taste. Sana leans in, allowing their lips to collide once more with a grip on the younger's waist. She then guides her, walking her all the way to the bedroom where she can push her onto the bed to lay down. "Clothes off" She orders, still standing as she pulls her hoodie over her head.

In a flash, Dahyun's wiggles herself out of her clothes and they end up somewhere on the floor. Sana giggles as she reaches to unclasp her bra, letting her small breasts go free. Now that they're both bare, Sana's ready to allow their bodies to come together again. She crawls on top of the smaller girl, kissing along her jawline, then all the way down to her kneck and chest.

Dahyun's got a great body. It's probably why Sana's so obsessed. She could spend hours just sucking on those perfect nipples of hers without getting bored or tired. Ask Dahyun, she's done it before. "Unnie" Dahyun moans, the pure unadulterated pleasure coursing throughout her body when she feels Sana's warm tongue on her nipple.

She flicks the muscle on the stiff peaks, massaging the other breast gently with her hand, careful not to dig her nails into the skin. Sana was mindful about things like that. It's part of the reason why Dahyun's only trusted Sana with her body thus far. "My perfect girl" Sana mutters as she moves to the next nipple, treating it with the same care and affection.

It was no joke that she could spend and hour doing it. The devilish smirk on her face and the intense eye contact she makes tells Dahyun that much. "Sana Unnie" Dahyun whines, hands weakly trying to push Sana down to where she needed her the most. 

Sana opens her mouth and starts licking around and between the younger girls breasts, coating her body with her saliva. She hums "Well what?" She plants a kiss between her tits "You keep calling me, but you won't tell me what you want"

Something that Sana loves to do? Tease. No matter if she was topping or bottoming, the girl is a tease. She know's how shy and red Dahyun can get once she's got her begging and pleading for her to do the nastiest things to her body. She really gets off on it. The whining, the whimpering, it's all like fuel to her when she hears the way the adorable sounds come out of Dahyun's mouth.

"Need your tongue... need your fingers" She squirms under Sana's weight, trying to achieve just the tiny bit of friction that'll be enough to at least ease the ache in between her legs. She can feel that her inner thighs are already all slippery with her arousal and it makes it all the more embarrassing. "Please, inside unnie" Her hips grind up into nothing.

Sana smirks "Whatever you want." Then she's going lower, still keeping that eye-contact as she kisses her way down Dahyun's sleek body. Down to her belly, all the way to her wanting cunt. Sana blows on it first, giggling at the sudden twitch her leg gives to the contact. Then Sana makes duck lips to plant soft kisses on her outer lips, coating them with her wetness "You would make a great lipgloss" Sana jokes.

Dahyun can't laugh, nor can she even acknowledge the joke that Sana made. Just her lips, Sana's soft fucking lips has Dahyun a whining mess. She needs more but she's so sensitive that each small kiss is almost too pleasureful. Thankfully, Sana stops teasing, she gets a good grip on Dahyun's plump thighs before flattening her tongue on her clit. "Oh- Yes Sana!" Dahyun says her name like she's the only girl in the world.

That's certainly what it felt like

She keeps going, licking, flicking and swirling her tongue on the sweet bundle of nerves between Dahyun's legs. She's going crazy, moaning and squirming with her fingers tangled in Sana's hair. She has to stop herself from pulling, but it feels so good she almost needs to. "S-Sana!" She whimpers, voice shaking as she moans the older girls name. It's like music to her ears.

"Mhm" Sana can only really hum to let Dahyun know that she's there and she hears her because her mouth is currently occupied. It doesn't take long for the younger girl to break eye contact, she throws her head back, hand covering her flushed face as she lay flat on the mattress.

She can swear up and down right now that nobody can eat her out like Sana. She knows her body inside and out, it's almost unfair.

Sana brings up her hand, prodding Dahyun's tight entrance with the long digit. As soon as she feels it she moans "Please!" Needing to feel Sana's fingers pounding and stretching her just the way she likes.

The older pulls her head back and spits on the sloppy cunt in front of her, spreading it around until she inevitably slides a finger inside. Dahyun grips the sheets so tight, it's probably done damage "So tight Dahyunnie" Sana murmurs before getting her mouth back on Dahyuns clit, making the girl choke out a moan.

Sana pumps her finger in and out, nice and slow so she's careful not to hurt her. She makes sure to curl it just the way Dahyun likes before she begins to swirl her tongue around. Figure eight motions will always get her going as Sana remembers, so thats exactly what she does, not at all caring if her tongue gets tired or sore. Dahyun tastes too good for her to stop and she sounds too good for her to stop.

The noises that fill the room are just obscene. Loud and aggressive slimy sounds at each flick of Sana's tongue and fingers. Then there's dahyun's pretty moans that she's given up on hiding at this point. It's hot, she's hot.

"Can I add another?" Sana detatches her lips for a moment to ask

"Yes please" Dahyun nods frantically and the look on her face is pure wreckage. Eyes squinted like she's about to cry when she throws her head back at the stretch of Sana's second finger. "Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank- ah!" That's the moment Sana hits her g-spot. 

Sana lowers her head again, wrapping her moist lips around Dahyun's clit to suck on the bud as hard as she can. It'll send her over the edge, she knows it. "Sanaaaa Fu-ah!" Dahyun grabs a pillow and puts it over her face, squeezing the soft object with all her strengh. 

Now Sana has to try a bit harder to hold Dahyun down with her free hand because she's moving around more. She holds strong though, working her fingers into the girl like her sole purpose in life is to make Dahyun cum as hard as she can.

By the looks of it, she was on the way there. With her moans going up an octave and the pillow not doing a very good job at quieting her down, her body begins to tremble. Sana hums and the vibrations immediately stimulate Dahyun's nerves in a way that sends her off of the edge almost immediately. "Sana... I'm cumming!" She moans out loud and proud through the pillow, hips stuttering and bucking in Sana's mouth as she tries to ride out her orgasm. It's so good it has her words getting stuck in her throat.

She begins to breath as if she's hyperventilating as her orgasm knocks the wind out of her. "God" She groans long and low. When she finally comes down from her high and Sana slips her fingers out and withdraws her mouth from the tired girl. 

Sana gets level with her, then puts her lips on hers "Thank you" Dahyun murmurs tiredly. 

Then Sana giggles a bit "No problem" her hand begins to slide down her body again but Dahyun weakly pushes her hand away because she's sensitive "Aw you don't want to have any more fun with me?"

Dahyun shakes her head "Mm-mm Unnie I'm tired" 

Sana only kisses her cheek and allows her to fall asleep in her arms, she deserves it.

-

In Nayeon's room, there's something a bit more sinister going on.

"What do you think Nayeon unnie? Should we give this pervert a break, or do you think she needs to cum one more time?" Momo giggles, allowing the purple vibrator in her hands graze Mina's clit ever so slightly. The younger girl can only whine and pull weakly at the handcuffs around her wrists.

Nayeon rubs her hand along Mina's sweaty body, tweaking her stiff nipples in between her fingers "I think our little Minari can handle a little more" The eldest leans in, putting her lips on Mina's to kiss her softly. While their lips move together in unison and their tongues begin to invade each others mouths, Momo slips the toy inside of Mina's tight hole. The way she moans into Nayeon's mouth makes the two giggle as the vibrator goes in and out of Mina's sopping cunt.

The poor girl can barely even keep up with the kiss. With Momo's punishing pace and Nayeon's wandering hands that knead her small breasts--it's all too much. Mina's hips buck and shake. In that moment her legs nearly shut. Momo glares, then slaps her thigh "remember what happens if you close your legs, slut" She says before angling the toy differently to fuck it into her just a bit deeper.

"I-I know, I didn't - fuck - I didn't close them" Mina moans, holding onto Nayeon's arm as she moves down to kiss against the quiet girls neck. 

"So greedy Mina" Nayeon makes a tsk noise "You've got both your little holes filled and it still doesn't seem like you're satisfied" She's referring to the butt plug that's been stretching Mina out since they started "How about we fill that loud mouth?" 

Momo laughs when she realizes where Nayeon's going with this but she doesn't say anything as she shifts to her knees to straddle Mina's face. If her face wasn't already red, it is now because the view she has of Nayeon's body right now is insane. Not to mention the taste when she actually gets herself seated. 

Like a good girl, Mina begins licking and sucking the best she can and it's already got Nayeon biting her lip. She turns to Momo "She doesn't get to cum until i'm finished, alright?" 

"And you call me mean" Momo stops to lower the vibrations, then she slows down the pace. She allows the dildo to slowly drag in and out of Mina, making sloppy sticky noises each time she buries it in her. 

The way Mina's moaning on Nayeon's cunt has her squeezing her eyes shut, rocking her hips back and forth on the younger girls perfect mouth. "I swear to fucking god... Mina you're amazing" Nayeon breathes, allowing one of her hands to come up to knead her own breasts. 

Momo can't just watch all of this unfold in front of her. It's just too fucking hot, the way Nayeon's groping her sweaty body, abs making an appearance from the absolute workout it is to ride face. Her body's perfect, Momo can mostly see the back, her perfectly round ass jiggling with each rut she makes against Mina's face.

The muffled noises that Mina's making isn't anything to ignore either, she sounds to eager to do well, all so she can cum on this toy for the fourth time tonight. So soon enough, Momo's fingers find her own cunt and she begins to rub her clit, moaning softly at the contact. It's not like she's been untouched either. Nayeon quite literally just finished eating her out, but still she wants to cum again.

So Momo figures she'll multi-task

"Fuck-k-king hell, Mina" Nayeon throws her head back, brown damp locks following in the air as silent moans escape her lips. Momo notices that familiar shake of Mina's legs so she pulls the dildo out and slaps it against Mina's cunt.

"You have to make your unnie cum first, darling" Momo teases as she slips her own fingers inside of herself. She glances at Nayeon "It seems like she's almost there" She gasps hotly as she curls her fingers, pressing on her g-spot and almost immediately losing her train of thought. 

"Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah" Nayeon freezes for a moment, then she keeps going, chanting the same words over and over. She's so hot when she gets like this, when she holds her orgasm for as long as possible to ride that edge. She likes to keep herself in that state for reasons that Momo can never figure out, all she knows is that it's hot.

She slips the toy back into Mina's wet heat, turning the vibrator up to the highest setting, she thinks it'll be poetic if the pair can cum together. She's not too far behind either, with the way her fingers are smashing into her needy cunt. 

Surprisingly, with a loud squeal, Nayeon's already cumming, shaking and stuttering on Mina's mouth. It seems she just couldn't hold back tonight. "Oh G-God! Oh fuck! Oh God!" She gapes as her orgasm hits her. She falls forwards, hands planted on the mattress as she grinds her cunt on Mina's lips. It's long and thorough, something that has Momo watching with pure adoration in her big eyes as she absentmindedly fucks Mina with the dildo, still using her free hand to play with herself.

When Nayeon finishes, she gets off of Mina and drapes her arm over her body "Good girl, Mina" She kisses her cheek, tasting remnants of her cum on the soft flesh. Mina only moans as Momo drives the fake cock deep into her cunt, filling her all the way. "Your turn, go ahead and cum for us darling. You've earned it" Nayeon reaches her hand down to circle Mina's clit.

Her eyes roll to the back of her skull and her back arches "I c-can't" She keens, legs shaking. 

When Nayeon notices it she gasps in excitement. "Oh look at our baby, Momo. Doesn't she fall apart so beautifully?" 

"She absolutely does" Momo bites her lip and that's when Mina's chest begins to rise and fall erratically, breaths audible as she takes them through her nose. 

"I'm cumming" Mina warns and right as she does, her entire body shakes with pleasure as it hits her. Nayeon only encourages her, smiling proudly as the girl cums right before her eyes. Soon, Momo crashes too, letting go of the dildo to instead grip the sheets as her legs slam shut against her wrists. As all the lust withers away, the pungent--but addicting--smell of sex becomes more noticeable.

"We need another shower I think" Momo swallows, taking hard and deep breaths as she stares into the ceiling.

[catsandcataclysms]

Oooh so I don't know much about real-life science, but science fiction science-- especially regarding other species-- is always SUPER fun for me. Here's some of my thoughts on some of your theories!!!

If they're precocial and basically able to survive on their own right away

We know, via book #19 and Aftran, that Yeerks are split from their parents:

"Three Yeerks [...] literally join together, with three bodies becoming one. Then that one body begins to fragment [...] into smaller pieces, grubs[...] The body disintegrates, and each grub that falls away becomes another Yeerk."

I suppose it's true that we don't know much about Yeerk Grubs, but caterpillar grubs tend to immediately start eating. Of course, social insects like wasps, bees, ants, etc are tended to by The Hive, but this is usually in a specialized location. From what we know of Yeerk culture and society (which is admittedly very little), I believe the implication here is that the grubs are in fact able to survive on their own, at least to a certain degree as you mentioned with baby deer.

Is taking a host a key stage of yeerk development, one that changes how the yeerk sees the world?

Aftran in #19 again:

"Oh, you can’t imagine! You can’t imagine the first time you enter a Gedd brain and seize control and suddenly, you are seeing! Seeing! Colors! Shapes! It’s a miracle. To be blind and then to see! [...] Do you see those flowers? Do you see the sunlight? Do you see the birds flying? You hate me for wanting that? You hate me because I won’t spend my life blind? You hate me because I won’t spend my life swimming endlessly in a sea of sludge, while humans like you live in a world of indescribable beauty?”

Which has my vote for "yes". But one Yeerk's experience does not a scientific conclusion make, so I'm going to pull from a lesser-remembered (or at least lesser-discussed) scene here-- that of Esplin 9466 himself, from The Hork-Bajir Chronicles.

But there were no host bodies available, not on this spacecraft. So we lived in our pool. As simple Yeerks must. And I would have lived happily enough. [...] I waited [to enter a host] impatiently, afraid. I admit it: afraid. You hear stories about what it’s like. About the hallucinatory sensory input. About the strange sensation of having another mind under your control. About the extension of your own body through unfamiliar limbs. But you don’t know till you do it. [...] Only someone who has done it can understand. It was … it was beyond description. Suddenly, I was not just myself, I was something much larger. Where my body ended, a second body began, so that very soon I forgot my own body entirely. [...] Oh! How can I explain it? The power! The joy! The feeling that I had suddenly grown huge, vast, powerful.

Which certainly seems to make it a key developmental stage! If nothing else, it lends credibility to the idea that a yeerk could be persuaded to think themselves human under the right circumstances.

However, directly after that scene, we have this:

Afterward I communicated with my friends and siblings. Many of them found the whole experience terrifying. Sickening. Awful. Not me. From that moment on, I swore that I would do whatever it took, pay any price, to have eyes again.

So I feel regardless of whether the experience is positive or negative, it is absolutely a fundamental developmental stage, imo. But it also heavily shows the bias-- the yeerks we most often see are the yeerks with hosts. Yeerks who prefer to live without hosts seem to be of... a larger majority than one might think due to, again, bias by only seeing the ones who do have hosts.

I don't have a direct conclusion or anything, but I think this honestly says so much about Yeerk culture and their development. There's just so much we can extrapolate from teeny tiny little tidbits... I love this series.

what if a yeerk didn't know/realize it was a yeerk? What if it thought it was a human kid?

I'm trying to figure out how this would happen, and imagination is failing me. There is some evidence we've successfully convinced nonhumans that they're humans — Nim Chimpsky would sort photos of himself among photos of humans, putting photos of chimps in a different pile. But Nim was a chimpanzee, sharing 99% of humans' genes. And he was taken from his mother when he was 10 days old to be raised exclusively by humans: sleeping in a bed, wearing clothes, eating with utensils, peeing in a toilet. He'd never met another chimp at the time of that study.

By our best guess, dogs don't think they're human, nor do most pets. Dogs easily learn to prefer humans (or sheep, cows, etc.) over other dogs, but the way they act around fellow dogs is completely different from how they act around other mammals of similar size/shape. This is both because dogs mostly spend their first weeks among their parents and siblings (if not they tend to die, so even shitty breeders rarely take bottle babies), and because dogs have obvious physical differences from humans. Being dogs, they probably care less that we lack fur or use language than that we smell like omnivores who rub themselves with soap, and that we move very differently from quadrupeds. Cats are harder to pin down, but they famously don't meow at each other, only at the dumb apes whose affection or tuna sandwiches they want to demand. I don't think anyone's investigated hamsters or goldfish, but I'm guessing the odds are against one mistaking a giant hand that comes from the sky to dispense pellets for being one's sibling.

So the issue with this hypothetical yeerk is threefold: 1) yeerks don't resemble humans, 2) yeerks need to see each other to feed, and 3) yeerks can't interact with humans without using a human host. Let's suppose that the yeerk is taken into a human home immediately after spawning, that the yeerk shows infantile amnesia (who knows), and that the yeerk grows up only feeding from a private pool that contains no other yeerks. Let's even suppose that we give the yeerk a Stephenie Meyer—style human host who is completely brain dead. Even under those circumstances, would the yeerk think "I'm human"? or would the yeerk think "all so-called humans are greenish slugs operating ape bodies like mech suits; we just don't mention this fact out loud"? And is that the same thing as thinking oneself human?

For that matter, did Nim Chimpsky really think he was human, or do his two piles of pictures simply mean "apes who wear clothes" and "apes who don't"? If he assumed all apes have a life stage of being hairy and good at climbing before metamorphosing into a hairless form good at running, is that the same thing as thinking himself human? Was there a different categorization in his head, and if so was it comparable to the boundaries that humans draw around the concept "human" — e.g. "like-mes" and "beasts"? He never actually learned a human language, because evidence would suggests apes cannot, so we'll never know his exact thought process.

[anadrym]

Extended Author's Notes for Left Behind Ch4.

Spoilers!

"I'm not making any decisions right now." Caitlyn, you're such a fucking liar. I love you so much.

Caitlyn really needs to get some better coping methods. I'm of the idea that she never properly learned how to grieve - when she lost her mom, she was immediately manipulated into turning her grief into a weapon to be wielded against someone else's enemies. And she didn't really lose anyone else until the Purge. So she's running on the only thing she knows: turn the grief into anger and use it to protect yourself from more grief. In this case, it actually does keep her alive. But that doesn't mean it's healthy.

"She hasn't changed that much; she probably won't have a lot of time before someone recognizes the missing Sheriff Kiramman." - This is pretty much the main reason I didn't go back through and account for Caitlyn's lost eye. It would make her so incredibly recognizable. That's me being lazy.

Caitlyn's outfit as Ghost is actually several asymmetrical layers of varying shades of grey. I think black would actually be too obvious, even at night, and the uneven layers help break up the human form to keep her harder to see.

Caitlyn doesn't take anything from her apartment. She doesn't have anything TO take. :(

I know I said this last chapter, but I LOVE writing Caitlyn and Petra's conversations. They're so fun.

Hmm... Why does Petra know a guy who smuggles things around Runeterra? Will this be a little important later? Who's to say? ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

Okay, everyone say "Bye, Petra!" Maybe we'll see her again later. (We will.)

Vi, my beloved. She just won't give up. I think that, even now, she's a little too selfless to let go. She doesn't want to live like this, but she won't let herself die on the chance that she might be leaving someone behind. I'm love her. so. much.

This team that Vi and her handler are working with are kinda inspired by a D&D party. A group of strange individuals who bounce around, working for whoever will pay them. They work for the Baroness sometimes. They also work for other Chem-Barons and gang leaders and the like.

The Feline Woman (and all of her companions) are just OCs. They're not based on any other characters. They're pretty much just one-off characters, but I DID decide to bring the Feline Woman back briefly later.

Both of our girls have trauma around fire, for obvious reasons. Interestingly, I ended up using fire and references to it so much that it kinda became a motif in this story.

The neighbors not intervening in any way is to show just how much control the Chen-Barons and gangs have over the common people. The fear of being the next example keeps them from helping, which keeps them divided.

I killed Tobias and I am going to take every opportunity to painfully remind everyone of that.

The kid that Vi is forced to kill here was probably about ten or eleven when the Purge happened. He doesn't recognize Vi. But anyone who happened to look outside during any of this attack might have - she was the Sheriff's partner, a rather public figure, and definitely recognizable. And that's the whole point.

Could Vi have ended the boy's suffering in one hit? If she was at full strength, sure. Easily, if she hit him in the right place. But they're not keeping her at full strength, because they don't want to risk it AND because they don't need to. She's serving her purpose perfectly as is.

Teaser for next week:

Ghost presses herself flatter to the rooftop. Her clothes are dark and the muzzle of her rifle is matte to prevent it from gleaming; they won't be able to see her. As they look for her, she sweeps her gaze over their group, counting them.

...two, three, four --

She sees a flash of familiar pink, and every fragment of her being goes absolutely still.

[beevean]

Let's see why Trevor's important... hmmm... without him, Sypha would remain stone, Grant some goblin thing, and Alucard would still be catching Zzzs in his little coffin.

Belmonts are fucking important. Without Leon, there's no Trevor, and without Trevor, no Simon, no Juste, no Richter, literally the entire line is just BLEH, nonexistent, nada. Julius? Gone. Nonexistent. Nope. Not even a spec of sperm existing. Without them, Dracula would fuck shit up real bad. What, some random kid from the streets is going to pick up some magical item and be able to take down Dracula? No, the Belmonts had a reason to exist, and when Belmonts aren't around, you KNOW people are up in arms, terrified, "fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK we gotta arm up, train for life, we're fucking DEAD if a certain asshole shows up again, we're reaching 100 years."

Trevors's KIDS marry into Helsing and Morris. Pretty. Fucking. IMPORTANT.

Ecclesia exists because, "holy shit, a Belmont isn't present to protect us, we gotta fucking do all this shit cause we are FUCKED. We are SO COOKED if Dracula gets up to his shit again, it's been 100 years, any day now, we gotta do something to beat his ass because, my god, we DONT HAVE A BELMONT WHO COULD TAKE HIM ON."

Alucard shows up in SOTN because what? "Holy fucking shit, the only Belmont around is literally fucking corrupted as shit, and since he can't protect the innocents from daddy-o, I gotta step in for him because what the fuck."

Tell me again why we are pissing all over the Belmonts in the anime? You know they literally have to make SOME excuse for Alucard and Sypha to not be able to be there with Trevor when he has to fight death. And then we see Richter. Richter, honey, are you doing good there? Yeah? Having fun? Having fun being the fucking tailbone of the series? Tailbone? No, forgive me for overestimating your importance to the story, the TOENAIL of YOUR OWN FUCKING SHOW. You, Belmont, and yet... What have you done? Besides cry at a river because oh no, mommy dead. And it isn't brought up again second season. Fuck, I guess we aren't gonna be traumatized that the only other mother figure is. A. Fucking. VAMPIRE.

I died inside when I saw Alucard in the first season, showing up to sAvE thE dAY. Oh my fucking god. No, seriously, my god, can we NOT have any moment without you, Alucard? Can we not just... not have you for a little while? Can Richter just grow the fuck up, have his little character arc, get fucking corrupted, and THEN your dumbass comes back from Hawaii or wherever your dumbass has been for the past 300 years since your threesome fucking DIED? I honestly don't even care if they decided to have him do a world tour instead of going to sleep for 300 years, just. COME ON.

They shouldn't have named it Castlevania. It should be more like: Nocturne: Fuck you, Richter, the girls called for Alucard. Nocturne: The Chronicles of a Sidekick. Nocturne: My Mommy died.

"Nocturne: My Mommy Died" made me spit out a lung because yes! Richter literally bonds with people through dead moms! 😂

writing.jpg

(but he makes sure to specify that Annette had it worse, of course, which gives me lovely S1 flashbacks of Annette looking down on him and calling him a child who doesn't know much of the world)

Anyway, I could talk about how the first show wasted the very idea they had, which is that Trevor is important to the gang because he's the Night Creature expert and because of his heritage he has all the tools and knowledge necessary to take out any vampire (since Dracula goes down attacked by his own depression, and Alucard is a massive cunt to Trevor precisely due to his Belmont heritage that he needs), or that it is incredibly obvious that the only reason the story jumped to 1792 is only so that they could bring back Alucard the fandom blorbo and provider of fanservice, who cares about some rando like uhhhhhh Simon Belmont... but your rant is a work of art and I want to print it and frame it on the wall. Beautiful. I'm in tears. I have nothing else to add.

[consolecadet]

Tips for freshly diagnosed celiac-havers

Someone I knew asked me for advice after getting diagnosed with celiac. I gave her some. I might as well share them with you as well!

I am not a doctor, and not your doctor, I'm just some guy with celiac disease. Ask an actual doctor for help with medical decisions. I'm in the northeastern United States, so you might have to go hunting for equivalent resources if you live elsewhere.

Are you done with testing?

If you had a tTG-IgA blood test with an elevated result, or a doctor just told you you have celiac, but you have not gotten a biopsy via endoscopy to confirm your diagnosis, WAIT! You may not want to stop eating gluten quite yet. You have to be eating gluten for the biopsy test to work.

It is not fun to stop eating gluten, start feeling better, and then have to start eating it again just to prove that you really have celiac disease.

Your choice in this area is personal. If you know you're going to have to wait years to get an endoscopy, it would probably be healthier and more pleasant to stop eating gluten now and then do a "gluten challenge" for a few weeks before your endoscopy.

If it's unlikely you will ever get an endoscopy (too expensive, inaccessible, phobia, etc), there's no point in waiting for something that may never come -- just stop eating gluten now.

But if you can schedule an endoscopy for a month or two from now, it's probably best to keep eating gluten until the endoscopy. Sorry.

Please eat food. Like, enough food.

The most important tip I got early in my diagnosis is that if you stop eating gluten and you start feeling crummy -- dizzy, cranky, tired, etc -- it's not because you're going through "gluten detox" or some shit. It's because you're hungry!

It's easy to accidentally start eating way less when you start eating gluten free. A celiac diagnosis can make you want to avoid eating because food feels scary and stressful. Cutting a major ingredient from your diet without knowing what to replace it with can also leave you undernourished.

You really need nourishment when you are recovering from celiac! Your body need energy from food to use on healing your intestines. If you've lived with celiac for a long time, you probably have vitamin deficiencies you're trying to bounce back from. The emotional difficulty of adjusting to a new diagnosis is also much easier to face if you're not starving.

All of this advice applies equally regardless of body size. Yes, even if you are very fat. If you're hungry, eat.

Where to find information about gluten-free food

The gold standard for basic celiac info is celiac nonprofits. There's a ton of info about celiac disease and the gluten free diet on their websites. I recommend:

Celiac Disease Foundation

Beyond Celiac

You know what's not a legitimate celiac nonprofit? Gluten Free Society. Do not listen to anything GFS or its founder Peter Osborne have to say. Osborne is not an actual doctor, nor is he doing actual nutrition science. He is a chiropractor (i.e. quack) so bad that his state's board of chiropractors threatened to revoke his license. Don't let anyone tell you celiac means you can't have corn!!! Truly, wtf @ this guy.

Google's AI summaries for searches like "Is XYZ food gluten free" are often inaccurate (because they pick up sites like GFS). I always click through to the source to be sure. "Is XYZ food celiac safe" sometimes gives more useful search results.

I also like this presentation "I Have Celiac" for a super in-depth guide to having and living with celiac. The OP made it to show to loved ones to explain their deal, but it's so thorough that I found it helpful for myself when I got my diagnosis.

I want to buy food that's safe for celiac...how do I do that?

You should be able to find gf food at any supermarket. The selection of baked goods and processed foods may be lacking, depending on where you live, but produce, raw unmarinated cuts of meat, and other whole foods like milk and eggs are generally safe even if not labeled gf.

A lot of supermarkets have an indicator on the price labels to help you -- for example, at Stop and Shop, the labels on the shelf have an orange circle that says "gf" in it under foods that are gluten free. It's best to check the packaging too, since Stop and Shop sometimes gets it wrong!

Something that says "gluten free" or "certified gluten free" on it is safe for celiac*. Something that doesn't say "gluten free" on the packaging may also be safe, so long as it also doesn't contain wheat, barley, or rye, or have a wheat allergy warning under the ingredient list. Here are some tips for what to look for on ingredient labels.

Labels can get real complicated real fast, so just use your best judgment. It's okay if you don't get it right 100% of the time. The goal when living with celiac is to reduce gluten exposure as much as possible, not to hermetically seal yourself in a deep well where a single molecule of gluten can never possibly reach your tongue. You, and only you, get to decide how much exposure risk you're comfortable with.

My favorite grocery store post-diagnosis is Wegmans. My nearest one is a bit of a hike, so I don't go that often, but it's such a treat when I do. Wegmans has a huge gluten free aisle with gf staples and fun snacks, plus lots of food items that can be harder to find gf, like fresh pasta and baked goods.

I also like the online health food store iHerb for finding new gf snacks and ingredients. You can filter the whole store by dietary needs, so you can also find gf skincare/makeup items and supplements if you want. I have a discount link for 20% off: https://secure.iherb.com/rewards/rewards-program?rcode=DRO2876

The best way to find restaurants that can accommodate celiac is Find Me Gluten Free. It's essentially a gluten-free Yelp. People use the site/app to review of restaurants for 1) what cross-contact precautions the restaurant takes and 2) crucially, if the food was good!

Gf food can be expensive, ngl. The National Celiac Association has advice for how to save money on gf food, including a database of food pantries that set aside gf food for people who need it.

GF ~influencers~

If you want to follow some people who Get It, I like:

Phil Hates Gluten (on IG, TT, and YT) has EoE (another gluten-related autoimmune condition). He reviews gf food and restaurants and makes silly videos about the gf experience.

Robyn's Gluten-free Living on YouTube has gf baking videos and advice about traveling, eating at restaurants, saving money on gf food, and more.

Here on Tumblr, @gluttonysansgluten and @certifiedceliac (and I would love more recommendations for celiac related Tumblr accounts!)

Having celiac is really hard. But it does get easier.

I felt overwhelmed and honestly kind of doomed when I got my celiac diagnosis. For the first few months I felt like I couldn't trust any food and I was going to be totally excluded at all social events forever. It sucked. But then I got a lot of practice figuring out which foods were safe for me, advocating for myself at restaurants and when my friends were planning get-togethers involving food, and now things are really not that bad. And I feel way, way less sick.

If you feel overwhelmed or don't know how to interpret the 1 million sources online telling you what's gluten free, I really recommend seeing a dietician. Your best bet is a weight-neutral or HAES dietician who mentions celiac somewhere on their website or online profile. You can generally count on those folks to give you practical information about how to live with celiac, as well as emotional support as you adjust to what is probably a pretty big and stressful change in your life and how you view yourself!

You got this!

*Please do not talk about Cheerios on my post. Make your own.

[follineo]

Siblings

more arts with cowboys ↓

IT TOOK ME A LONG TIME TO DRAW THIS BUT IT WAS WORTH IT I REALLY LIKE THE RESULT IT'S NOW MY NEW WALLPAPER ON MY COMPUTER AAA

Well now seriously, I just wanted to draw them together, even knowing that in canon they don't know about each other, but I really wanted to and this is what I create! While painting I realised that I should probably make larger canvases for finished arts, but that still didn't stop me from enjoying the drawing process :3c Painted this for quite a while, 5 hours and 45 minutes, but it was worth it!

GO FOR IT!! Very silly redraw that I started back in September, but at the sketch stage I realised that I not happy with the result and left the idea for later... BUT!! Yesterday I decided to try again to bring this stupid idea to life and finally!!!! :D

I'm happy with the result! I like how I was able to portray Ernest's face and the overall detail of the drawing. It took me a long time to draw this too, 5 hours and 40 minutes, but I've done it in two days and not in few weeks hah

and another one redraw with Ernest which is almost a two weeks old, I just thought it would be funny…. Sorry!! draw this in 3 hours and yeah also love the result

this…. that's all for today! I have also few sketches of them more, but they are just flying heads so ahem ahem

Thanks to these drawings I also realised by the way that I haven't drawn Connie in a while, so who knows, maybe art with her will be the next…

ANYWAY! Every characters belong to @ghost-qwq !!!

Thanks for attention!

[unproduciblesmackdown]

also "textless" versions of these, wahooo

[shirogane-oushirou]

no promises anymoooooreeeee i'll appear online when i appear online 😭 every time i say "ooh i think life is almost done being overwhelming!" it. becomes even more overwhelming in the dumbest ways. all i can manage rn when i'm not stressing myself into a shut-down state is staring at the wall while listening to youtube essays + mindlessly crocheting.

i might queue up ppls art and fics w/o commentary in the tags... i want other ppl to see what all of my cool friends have made, but i genuinely can't think right now with this monstrous brain fog. i'm really sorry, just. yeah. maybe i'll think of some way to make it up later!!! once the dust has settled!!!! but until then i wuv u and miss u. smiles.

[venting in tags including familial manipulation and ableism. i. didn't mean to write all of that, thiss was originally going to be a main blog post but. aaaaaAAAAAA!!!!!

also no need for replies or anything, i'd turn them off for just the one post if i could kjsndkn, i just needed to get things out and go eep jsjndsfdn ok bye bye bye bye!!!!]

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

one odd thing about going deeper is that I'm no longer satisfied with shallower. and that's, weirdly enough, a net positive. I've self harmed - eh, twice? in the last month. both were well into the criteria that should have got sutures and ignored it; suspect I hit a vein once and was extremely close to muscle, which feels kind of odd. yeah, it's ramped up; yeah, there's a lot of blood and all that kind of stuff. very high risk of infection, potential nerve damage and all that kind of stuff (though I have not got either of them; I scared off an infection that wanted to hang round by chucking quantities of alcohol on it). but at the same time. that's only twice. that's a lot better than previously.

[hpdfag]

feel like im getting stabbed in the chest every time i think about him. is this even what love is supposed to feel like

[lieutenantselnia]

Internet archive I love you❤️❤️❤️

[pyrriax]

ANYWHO goodnight tumblr i'll be back on the art grind tomorrow i think 🙏

[fragglerockopinions]

The worst thing about suffering is that it still hurts when the danger is over but no one cares about it anymore because it shouldn't hurt. No one will ever say "I'm sorry that happened to you" especially when they barely say "I'm sorry that's happening."

[fiveamandawake]

sigh

[cryptic-rainfall]

I want to point out, that hazbin hotel is the reason my steam streak was broken, which just makes me so bitter. (My sister wanted to show me clips which I was fine with, and that made me want to read the hazbin hotel critique article to her, and then I looked up and it was past midnight.)

I did cry over losing my steam streak, and it was just a crazy jampacked day all around so it might have happened anyway. I've mostly accepted it (just a testament to how much I needed the break that started today), but it still really sucks. I've had that steam streak since my birthday.....

[dimeadozencows]

There are a lot of great tags on this post, and a lot of different and unique takes on gaster which i always love to read :DD but i dont think i managed to evoke what i wanted to with this drawing

We know that gasters aware hes in a video game, but so many characters in undertale are aware of that already. One of the things that make gasters situation different is his ability to look at our world directly. He's aware that we've been looking for him and trying to understand what and who he is, he knows these last few years were dogshit for everyone on earth and mentions it in his pre chapter 2 tweets, he knows our life outside of our tempering with these worlds

And unlike other self aware characters in undertale, he doesn't experience time and the resets. He "lives" outside of what we can control. He truly remembers all that we've done while being unaffected by any of it. So while other self aware characters (im mainly thinking of sans and flowey) know that theres a person behind frisk whos controlling time, they're affected by our choices and (for the most part) can't judge it from an outside perspective

Sans is mostly unaffected by our inputs, and he does manage to judge us in a very impactful way, but he can't be a completely uninvolved judge. He will (understandably) react to us killing his brother and on certain neutral endings, as much as hes trying to hold his unfazed facade together, he's struggling with the thought of how much of his happiness you took away, even if he knows a reset will likely happen and everything will go back to the way it was. Understandably! This game is his world. Even if he knows its just a game that gets reset its still his home and the people he loves are its residents. He can't be unfazed by everything. he is nice to us when we're nice to him, and he hates our guts when we give him reason to. And he will always forget us after a reset and react to our actions only on the current run, not being able to know who we were to him before.

And flowey acts as the embodiment of this games message, he is our mirror and, in his words, he is who we will become if we exhaust this game of all it has. He exists to judge us, but he can do so only from his own point of view. He's judging our actions, our choices in this world as if we we're stuck inside it the way he is, which we aren't. That's not to say his judgement isn't impactful, that would just be. incorrect to say lol. But he can't interpret what he sees us do in a fully unbiased way because he's in a very similar, but not identical, situation to us. While we can enter his world and play the kind way, we do get bored and try new things, like picking the other, more rude dialogue option, or killing a character to see what a person who loves them says. even if we don't fully want to. Just like he said! But while we both went through the same process, there's a difference between us. We can leave. We don't have to grow apathetic and detached from these characters. We don't have to start seeing them less as people and more as repetitive lines of dialogue. If we're bored, we can leave. Play a new game. Come back when we miss them and see those familiar lines of dialogue and feel nostalgia, not dread. And he knows that we're a person that has a life outside of this game. At the end of pacifist he desperately tries to make us stay. But he doesn't see what our life is like, he cant see what we do with our days outside of his world, so he can only see us leave and return and leave and return, and judge us through his (flawed) world view and based on our actions within a world we enter for fun.

Thats not to say they're not written well? They're the fucking coolest flowey and sans rule.(i think the info dump proves my stance on them) I'm just saying that even if they know about us they cant fully judge the situation from a neutral point of view because they have a limited world view and they're affected by our choices, which gaster (as of now) isn't

And we don't know a lot about him. But we do know that he knows hes in a video game, that he knows we control his world and its linear time, that he lives outside of that linear time and is unaffected by our inputs, that he used to experience time linearly before shattering, that he had people he cared about in undertale, that he saw everything all of us did when playing undertale, that he is kind to us in the current deltarune chapters, that he knows of our lives and what we go through, and most importantly in my opinion, he knows that we (fans of utdr) use fiction as escapism

We've had characters judge us and berate us for our misdeeds, who are fully justified in doing so since we did hurt them directly. But they also cannot see the situation from an outside perspective. No character in undertale sees us separated from their world, as a person who lives a life outside of tempering with undertale, to them we are just a god who takes control of their reality, all they see is a cruel person who entered a world just to destroy it, or give everyone freedom and then just take it away in a second, they don't see how small their world is in comparison to ours, they'll never be able to understand that our actions in their world are (for the most part) inconsequential to us. they cant see us beyond the red soul.

so imagine with me for a second, a character within the game who is not only aware of the fact that he's in a game and that there's a player who controls time, but who also has the ability to SEE the players' lives through the internet. A character who has the ability to see the horrors of everyday real life and how much people struggle with it, and see that some deal with those struggles using fiction. And not just any fiction, the fiction that the character itself lives in. A character who knows that these great beings, much bigger than him, use the thought of him and his world to get through the trials and tribulations of their lives, hardships that are horrific in completely different ways than his world ever had. A character who knows that they find comfort indulging in his world and finding everything it has to offer, because whatever his world has is much more pleasant than theirs.

He knows that to us his world is just a video game, one that remembers and we're not above consequences in, but still a video game. One of the most common complaints i hear about UT is that it is preachy in its message, and players shouldn't be berated by it for playing certain routes or making certain choices (but one of the points of the game was that there is an alternative way to complete it so why choose violence BUT that is a whole conversation in it of itself and this is long enough already)

So what if the game understood? What if the character who created this game, this world, knew that it is just a game and didn't judge the player? What if the character accepted that he is only fiction and saw the beauty and purpose within it, and how he can use his position in this situation to connect with us and allow us to escape our hurt for just a little while? What if he saw the hardships we've endured and empathised with us? What if he understood that we don't view his world as real like he does and we just use it for our fun, to escape, the way a child happily plays with a toy? What if he felt for us, and encouraged it?

Deltarune (initially) not having a way to really hurt and kill people makes me think that while gaster wanted us in this world for whatever his larger goal is, and wanted us to indulge in it, he didn't want us to hurt anyone. But he saw what we did with the previous world and knows that warnings, consequences and the visible and audible hurt of the characters won't stop us (in fact, it will encourage us), which is something he accepts and understands. it's said that his own curiosity brought him far in his endeavours so perhaps he even understands our curiosity and why we just have to see what would happen, as morbid as it is in universe

But i love that we (without the help of noelle, a game breaking pro) cannot kill anyone. He didn't even give us that option. He isn't completely detached from these worlds since he used to live within them. He still views the fictional characters in the game as real while also knowing us, our lives, and the way we interact with the characters. And he loves and cares for both.

Letting us escape into a nicer world while keeping the residents of it safe from us.

And that is of course assuming he isn't tricking us into a false sense of security to teach us a lesson, and isn't lying to our faces every time he talks to us kindly and thanks us. but i think that after an entire game and a whole cast of characters who taught us lessons and took control away from us and showed us what an asshole we are for playing the game in an unkind way.. i think it'll be a really nice thing and a breath of fresh air to have a character who knows what they and their world are to us on a realistic scale, see why we sometimes act so detached from its ways, and understand that yeah, it is just a game. And we do the things we do as a means to escape. And that it isn't necessarily a bad thing to interact with games in this way (to me that sounds like the most self aware character ever written). But also see the characters within it as real (since he used to be amongst them) and protect them from our worst.

Truly and wholeheartedly loving and caring for both his family and the person who barely hesitates to strip them of all their joy before murdering them too.

Kissing the hands of the man who killed his son

I have endured what no one on earth has ever done before

I put my lips to the hands of the man who killed my son