#If you know the quote I like you a little more than the rest
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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 9 hours ago
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I interpreted the "adaptation from the manga" thing to imply that they'll animate the 3 Yuus (like you said) but my partner proposed smth to me that raised my concerns... what if they only animate Yuuka? or like- default to a female Yuu? I could see that bc it would be probably easier for them to have only one protagonist.
don't get me wrong I like Yuuka and I know a lot of TWST fans are women but since the studio involved is apparently known for shojos I'm scared they'll make it seem like the story is romantic/the game is an otome... Which I mean- we do have SOME fanservice stuff but it's definitely not a romance story. That's why I'm scared 😭 if they do go that path... I much rather prefer the disconnection (?) of having 3 different Yuus than the possibility of this...
Also I'm just đŸ„Č I'm scared ppl will see that and say ahhh So Yuu has always been a woman!! Because as a trans guy, one thing that rlly made me feel valid in a way was seeing that in the game Yuu has no gender at all... I don't go by they/them but I'd much rather be referred as that than to be misgendered. It's a small thing but it's such an important detail for me (the fact that Yuu is gender neutral/can be whatever u want them to be) that it being erased in the anime would make me pretty sad... even more if ppl take the anime as "confirmation" of Yuu's gender, which it wouldn't be regardless if they end up giving us a girl OR guy Yuu- it would just be another Yuu interpretation different from the game.
But yeah, personal stuff aside, I'm more scared by the possibility of them making it seem like it's a romance story 😭 or ppl calling TWST an otome... which I mean... some people already have that misconception, even some fans...
[Referencing this post and this news!]
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I definitely think they're probably leaning towards a new Yuu every season; otherwise, there would be a very uneven distribution of screen time for one Yuu over the others, and that leads into the problem of one Yuu being "more" canon than the rest. Yes, it will probably be easier logistically speaking to keep the same Yuu for the entire anime--but I also said the same thing when we only had the Episode of Heartslabyul manga, and look what happened with that. We ended up getting Yuuka and Yuuta following Yuuken, regardless of the logistical inconvenience of it all. I think if the anime intended to have a singular Yuu to follow for the main story, they would have chosen to adapt the light novel (which has Yuuya across multiple volumes) instead of the manga. The conscious decision to adapt the manga (with changing Yuus) says something to me. So really, I don't think we have to worry about one "kind" of Yuu dominating the anime. I took a look at the portfolios of the two studios collaborating for the Twst anime and didn't see a ton of shoujo myself. There was definitely a handful of them, but overall there was a spread of genres. I think Yumeta Company (one of the studios) has Tokyo Mew Mew New under its belt, which is probably one of its better-known works and maybe that's where the "they're known for doing shoujo" allegations are coming from? Don't quote me on that, though. I'm not someone who closely follows anime studios.
I would, however, like to point out that we shouldn't put all our stock into the studios behind the anime. Yes, they are obviously animating the project and thus have an influence on how the final product is. However, there are tons of other people involved (like the script writer) that will dictate how the anime looks and feels. (In fact, the script writer for the Twst anime, Kato Yoichi, is not known for writing shoujo.) I highly doubt all the staff involved at every possible level of production are conspiring to make Twst a genre it's not. (Related: I blame socialization for this, but it's a little sad that most of us by default think one woman + a bunch of men in a cast must be romantic.)
Now, to your main point. I understand the initial fear of people misunderstanding Twst as a dating sim/otome from how it is presented. Really, I do. I also understand the frustration that comes with people claiming Yuu's identity or gender or what have you is "confirmed". But to that, I ask you: so what? And I don't mean that in a "your feelings aren't valid" way (because your feelings are very valid!) I mean in like... Do these misconceptions others have truly impact your own enjoyment? Do the people believing in these falsehoods erase what you know is the truth? I would wager it doesn't. There has been and always will be those who see Twst or interpret Yuu as something they are not. Lots of us (myself included) thought Twst was an otome game when they first heard of its concept. People claimed Yuuken was the definitive Yuu when the first chapter of the manga dropped. That's fandom, especially the larger they get. If we fixate on those sore spots, it will ultimately make us unhappy because there will never be an end to misunderstandings. I would advise that you try and detach from those worries and just focus on having your own fun in the fandom rather than worrying about how others are consuming or reacting to Twst. Yes, we want Twst, a franchise we've seriously been invested in and love, to be seen a certain way--but I don't think that should come at the cost of your enjoyment. Fandom is meant to be fun, and we don't want to make ourselves miserable by stressing over the "what ifs", you know? Please focus on yourself!!
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stardust-in-my-mind-blog · 3 days ago
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It's here. The moment. Fuck.
This stupid quote and this stupid sad guy whose stupid name looks like stupid frodo has been seen by my stupid eyes over and over and over.
And I have thought with full ego, "It's okay. This time I'm ready. This time I will finally get justice. This time I will research everything and know all the laws and eventually organize all my evidence. This time will be the time everything comes together. This time I will win the war on my own justice because I am prepared and strong and I got this."
And I waited. I took the hits. I learned how to feel things. I recalibrated. I was clever. I was perfect. I never let myself fucking relax because I was ready. I had the outcome in mind. This was it and he was dumb enough to play wrong. I got this.
And today I have to accept that I don't.
And worst still? It doesn't fucking matter,
I can still use all this learning and work and wisdom and even the documentation for something. It's beautiful and I don't regret learning to making any of it. I can learn the lesson, cut my losses, and just move on. I'm not fighting for the end of my world by going to war and dragging this out.
I betrayed and abandoned myself for nothing.
Choosing to drag this out in the court system and waste money and go through all the hoops right after this last election?
It would be for nothing.
I have the ability to make his life miserable for the rest of his. I don't need to pay thousands to do that if I want to. I can tell my story wherever I want and I don't have to have it judged by people in the way the judicial system would process it. I have the freedom to get whatever satisfaction I need to move on. I don't have the money or time or energy to prove it to an entire system.
I don't need to devote myself to teaching him a lesson. I can just get rid of him and make sure my son is taken care of. That's all that matters to me anyways. I don't regret raising him better than anyone else could or putting my trust in someone who decided to abuse it.
But it hurts. It feels like losing a friend. My evil ego friend who was going to make everything okay and everybody pay.
I don't have to kill her but I do have to rename her. I think I'm also sad that I learned quickly that my voluntary isolation did make me overestimate my abilities of influence with people that have more braincells than a goldfish unlike my ex.
Arrogance doesn't make intelligence and I'm smart enough to know my platform is a rotting soapbox and not a stage where I can razzle dazzle them.
If this was a karaoke battle I'd whip their asses, though.
I have to build yet another grave for this ego death. At this point I have a little cemetery I've had to build in my mind to keep track of them.
I am so disappointed. I'm kind of relieved. I mostly feel stupid. I felt the bee color spectrum of human emotions today and didn't end up with an autistic meltdown. Or a migraine. That, my friends, is something.
Fuck. Unlocked a new mystery path, I guess.
“Your worst sin is that you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for nothing.”
— Fyodor Dostoevsky, “Crime and Punishment”
Today must have been gollum biting my finger off before I throw him into the volcano. Or annikan screaming his hatred as he burns with his legs cut off.
Fuck you, Dostoevsky. You got me. Finally.
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“Your worst sin is that you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for nothing.”
— Fyodor Dostoevsky, “Crime and Punishment”
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sabine-smitten-obviously · 9 hours ago
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And YOU will feel healed of the last 15
... when you read this fic. That is, as long as you suffered from an abandonement wound like i did.
Ello lovelies, i have another wonderful fanfic-rec for you! đŸ€“
But you are an ocean by @ineffably-good
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Coverart by @ineffableclassics
What it is about:
After Aziraphale's defection, Crowley tries to figure out how to live life for himself.
Notes:
Ok so, the end of season two broke me. Figured I was maybe done writing stories about these two after that. And yet, several hours later, a sentence appeared in my head, and then this happened. Guessing at chapter totals
 I'm finding I like the idea of Crowley going off in a different direction than what I'd initially expect. Not just raging, not sleeping for a century, but actually trying to move on. And why the hell shouldn't he just move to the South Downs by himself? So here we are.
What i like about it:
đŸ©·This fic doesnÂŽt jump in on pushing the story - their story - forward. Instead it goes a totally different path. A quite big part of it is dedicated to Crowley mending the pieces of his broken heart. ItÂŽs endearing, itÂŽs breathtaking and it will have you cry. Not only for Crowley but for every single person who ever had to endure heartbreak.
đŸ©·Fun fact no.1: in real life I am a relationship-coach specialised in toxic relationships and heartbreak. And the way CrowleyÂŽs heartbreak is described couldnÂŽt be any more accurate. Every thought, every pain, every action he takes, the strength it costs him, the weight of it all - its written absolutely to the point. I could have copied several pages for the "most beloved quote".
đŸ©·So Crowley tries to build a life for himself. Not just living without the angel and rotting in a pit, but really trying to carve out a nice little existence for himself. He is doing his work, he is healing and you can follow along with him, as he learns to build at least new "friendships" - though he would never call it that himself, thanks a lot.
đŸ©·This healing-journey takes quite some time and somewhere in the middle of it i started to think - he could do it. He COULD heal his hurt, mourn the loss and still somehow at least live a life on his own. Maybe feeling the missing part of himself for the rest of his existence, but not being miserable about it the whole time. And that is a thought - a wish - i would have for my dark angel.
I could see him living that life and at one point i almost thought - i would love to see how that wouldÂŽve played out for him. A life without Aziraphale. What connections would Crowley have made? How would he have coped with the loss of those humanly connections lifespan after lifespan? Would he have relocated each century? Would he have moved to Australia and learned surfing at one time? Would he have become a timelord and travelled - i mean seriously, Crowley could do that probably?
But you, my dear, are an ocean.
And oceans are ancient
And can survive everything,
Even the wrath of weather and planets.
-- Nikita Gill
SPOILERS AHEAD - if you donÂŽt want to know the plot, stop reading here.
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Stop reading if you dont want spoilers!
Ok - youÂŽve been warned! Here we go: đŸ€—
đŸ©·Fun fact no.2: I actually downloaded this fic some time ago but had another fic in mind i wanted to start next. So after i finished the last one (also really brilliant, i wrote a rec on it too), i started my e-reader the next day, THIS fic was already open instead on page 1. Huh?
I have absolutely no idea how this is possible, but i DO believe in hints-of-the-universe. Or little demonic miracles on their own. Because i needed this fic.
đŸ©·Because of course - this is a Good Omens fanfic and eventually the other angel arrives. And without giving away to much: Aziraphale has to fight for Crowley. A long long time. He has to be steadfast and consistent and earn the trust of his has-been-companion-for-millenia. Nothing is a given any more.
And i am NOT saying that this is what Aziraphale needs to do or that he was wrong in any way. (The fic doesnt say that either by the way.) But what cracked ME personally about the last 15 was my own abandonement-wound which got triggered massively. I felt retraumatised even.
So reading and feeling that Crowley does not jump on the next best possibility to be back with the angel was a big thing. Having the Angel slowly earning his trust and simply showing up again and again - I needed that. I needed Crowley to take his time, not be the sick lovefool he is often proclaimed to be. For him to have doubts, to feel conflicted, to feel love and the need to self-preserve at the same time.
All these ambiguities we all have. And to take the steps with him. Watch the turning point, when the fear of losing Aziraphale again becomes less and less and the fear of wasting time gets stronger. Taking one step at a time, sometimes even backwards. All those things, typical for a healing process, which is never straight forward but most of the time a rollercoaster instead. I loved this. I needed this. I could sit back, breathe and watch my own heart grow. Just. Wow.
Most beloved quote:
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So if you feel like maybe you need a fic in which Aziraphale really shows up and cares while Crowley really takes his time to learn to trust again... And not because one of them has been an idiot, but to experience them both learning and growing together ... and that might be something for your own healing journey, this might be just THE fic for you. I absolutely loved it and so will you.
Reading is therapy! đŸ€—
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daily-crowley · 1 year ago
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Crowley Of The Day: “here comes the smolder.”
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palaceoftears · 22 days ago
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Magnificent Century Rewatch: One Picspam per Episode
Episode 17: The Double Joy
-My dear mother used to say "walk barefoot on earth and it shall take away all your troubles and sorrows, earth shall give you happiness and joy"
-Your mother spoke well, one can only find peace in earth. But I'm not sure if it is on earth or in it.
#the quote is a little bit silly but it adquires seriousness when you know everything that comes later#especially because it's hurrem's mother's quote from when she lived in ruthenia. when peace was possible. when she was going to marry leo#and had her future all planned. and there was stability#but the joke is suleyman's. after all becoming part of his family is what brings that ambiguity to the quote for hurrem's story#as it could be argued she never found true peace. at least for the most of her life#but also suleyman speaks in general terms here. so the quote can be extended to all the characters and in this episode of double joy it's#even more significant. because peace it's going to go sooner than later. and the signals of future ibratice problems are already there#and just as the birds are partly symbolic of that temporal peace and joy in love for hurrem the gifts the marriage gets are very important#as well#this episode is just gifts gifts gifts all around#suleyman's necklace for hatice has the tulips of the dynasty and it's something ibrahim himself recognizes could never give her#she says she's always going to have it w her. tho i don't remember seeing it too much in her tbh sdfy#in the other side ibrahim gets a lot of gifts. but the one that reminds him of his origin is his father's ofc. and he says he will always#have it with him as well. and later he gets suleyman's ring [i'm w haticehurrem. this totally looks like a subrahim wedding asfg]#which goes to remind us that he's now officially part of his family as well. he returned but he converted again. and THEN there's the table!#and taking away the politic alliance it could signify. it is venetian. his mother's heritage is there. in all the palace. and in the same#episode hurrem mentioned her mother's saying. the dynasty [or at least the most conservative side represented by ayse] it's unconfortable#the converts are not only winning more power and getting closer to the family. but they're also bringing their cultures & traditions to the#*ba dum tss* table#there's more to the whole return/convert and how it shows in the ibratice palace especially later w the statues but if i ever write about it#it deserves a post of its own ofc [and prolly someone that knows what they're talking about more than me lmao]#noo why did i write so much 😭 i should've done a separate post this is a mess to be under an already long picspam#anyways there's other significant gifts as the clock that musti likes or mahi's lucky charm for selim. and also the ones we already knew:#the ibratice gifts together 💝. and these contrast a lot with the rest because it's something of their own. when the couple was separated#from dynastic or even ibro's family. will they ever find peace again? we'll see it in the next episode [i'm lying]#maybe i should organize this in a post of its own#magnificent century#muhtesem yuzyil#mc1picspam4episode
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sanemistar · 2 months ago
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᧔o᧓ husband!kento x wife!reader, established relationship, domestic fluff, requested by @luvnami <3 (i hope you don’t mind the headcanons, i just wanted to include as many fluff themes as possible <3)
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ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who never misses his good morning and good night kisses to you.
ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who gets you a bouquet of your favorite flowers almost every day, because he knows how much you love them.
ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who almost never eats outside because he loves when you cook dinner for him after a long day of work, takeout can never stand a chance against your cooking.
ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who praises you for every little thing you do for him, because you deserve to be praised all the time.
ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who rests his head on your lap as he grabs one of his favorite books to read, your thighs are far more comfortable and warmer than any pillow.
ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who lets you do his tie for him every time, not because he doesn’t know how to. but because he likes having your hands all over his chest.
ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who loves giving you back massages when you feel exhausted (it’s mostly just an excuse for him to touch you)
ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who brings you breakfast to bed every morning, you're his wife so you're definitely getting that princess treatment.
ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who does the house chores for you when you're tired, even if he's also pretty tired himself. your comfort is his most important priority.
ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who takes pride in calling you his wife, you have everything he’s ever asked for and more.
ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who never lets go of your hand when you two are walking together in public, especially in crowded areas. you will never be separated, not on his watch.
ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who lets you pick his clothes for him every time you two go shopping for clothes.
ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who loves to travel with you on his days off, he wants to see the world with you by his side.
ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who expresses his love for you using the most romantic book quotes.
ᥣ𐭩 | husband!kento who’s still head over heels for you every day as if he’s falling in love with you all over again for the first time.
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à­šà­§ taglist: @spkyssn @yueliie @ayrastv | back: jjk m.list
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mad-hunts · 3 months ago
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with the recent development of how barton was dozing, the old car warehouse fell into a deep silence (at least on his part). and because matilda's voice was unintelligible from the kitchen — perhaps because she was purposely keeping her voice low, it was like you could now hear a pin drop in it. even matilda could tell from where she stood that the dynamic in the main room had suddenly changed. she just hoped that barton had fallen asleep again, and not that they'd killed each other while she had been gone. a sigh left matilda's mouth as she hung up the phone from the second person she'd called then.
she was tired, and she needed someplace to recuperate away from those two; though that was something matilda chose to keep a secret from her father for now. barton would probably be mad at her for what she'd done, but sleep was something she needed. and with the way things were at that moment? matilda would be lucky to even get a wink in as barton's condition only seemed to be worsening over time. plus, it's better to ask for forgiveness than permission, right? she really hoped that was the way to go here. returning to the main part of the warehouse felt like a little bit like she was entering a solemn hospital room.
it was grim, and there before her lied two people whom were definitely not at their best, after all. matilda only rearranged the blankets in her around barton while jervis informed her about cell regeneration. it's not that she wasn't listening, though; matilda was actually drawing up an antipyretic which she'd injected into the port of the IV bag. she kept her facial expression neutral as she capped the needle, before her eyes darted over to jervis. ❝ mhm. he's a doctor, like my dad. but that's about where the similarities end between them. his name is nico morselli; and hmm, that's interesting. was it just the brains complexities that appealed to you to get into neuroscience or? ❞
small-talk. matilda didn't usually like to engage in it, but she couldn't really think of anything else to talk about. barton was not something she particularly wanted to touch upon and jervis's own poor physical state wasn't either. the other looked like he was at war with himself over something in his head, and honestly, matilda could kind of relate to that. this whole situation was crazy. it was mind-bogglingly insane, but those were the types of conditions matilda dealt in more than 50% of the time. so she had gotten used to it long ago and tried her best to put anything she couldn't deal with in a metaphorical vault in her head. barton could be a pretty okay father at times, after all, but he could also be a terrible one.
failing him was like failing the world with how seriously he usually took it. but matilda was still glad that barton had been able to call her for help, because she loved him. which might be something that made her suffer sometimes... even though familial love isn't supposed to be like that. matilda was just about to go to throw away the vial she grabbed before she saw at the very last second that jervis didn't look well at all. her eyes widened slightly when she saw that, yes, he had fainted — a barely audible expletive leaving her lips before she speed-walked over to him.
thank god jervis was still breathing, had a pulse, and everything. pulling him into a fireman's carry was only a bit challenging for her since she had built some muscle up and upper body strength over the years; but matilda managed to do so eventually, the bed in the back room past the kitchen being where she put him down. it must've taken her about 15 minutes because that was when she'd heard a loud knock at the shutters of the warehouse. she quickly let the duo standing outside in, then, ❝ my dad is over there and i think he's got some brain swelling, so could you take care of him, please? i'm going to take care of jervis in the back. and you, i guess... come with me. ❞
from there, it was like matilda and the person in question were in overdrive: they had put an IV in jervis after some deliberation about whether they should and barton had, indeed, been revealed to have some swelling in the brain. so nico has given him medicine that would hopefully ease it all down, but wanted to stay to monitor him for a while anyhow. then... after chomping down on some food one of the people brought with them, matilda bid her adieu after swearing she'd be back once she got some sleep.
it was nearly a full four hours later when barton had finally come back to the land of the living. and the first thing he saw was nico, whom looked somewhat surprised, but still happy to see he was awake. all that barton could focus on however was that he couldn't see matilda anywhere; so, naturally, he asked about her and the doctor told him someone else had agreed to watch over the both of them while his daughter got some necessary rest from all of the 'insanity.'
the 'someone else' was in the main room and was just in the middle of turning around while practicing his aerial silking when they had caught eyes. it was perhaps one of the strangest things to see upon waking up, barton thought. but the way that jack quickly unfurled himself from the rope and landed perfectly was kind of impressive. jack waved at him then from where he stood, ❝ oh, hey, dad! i bet you're glad to see i didn't land on my face this time — right? ❞ self-depreciating humor. barton wanted to groan at that, but he found himself rolling his eyes playfully at that instead.
it was frustrating that he couldn't be angry at matilda for leaving at that, ❝ yeah, i am. but that wasn't exactly my first thought upon seeing you. what happened? is jervis still here, and is it true that matilda felt like she had to leave just to — ❞ barton couldn't even finish his sentence before he was suddenly being squeezed into a hug by jack. now, that was one thing he wasn't expecting. ❝ uhh... what's wrong, miel (honey)? ❞ he embraced his son back loosely at first before returning the hug fully. ❝ well, you were really sick, so i guess i'm just glad that you're okay. i was worried about you. ❞
barton was about to say something but then jack pulled away and his eyes actually looked watery with tears. his son rubbed at one of them before chuckling, ❝ sorry, sorry. i just... got something in my eye. if jervis is that guy in the back room, i've been checking to make sure he's still alive every now and again. just like you taught me, ❞ barton remained a bit speechless even now while he was just sitting there. it was easy to forget sometimes how warm he was compared to the rest of the family; for, although they weren't blood-related, jack had still grown up around someone who people was said was ice-cold. without a heart.
❝ speaking of, i have to check on him again. i'll be right back, ❞ and just like that, he was gone. jack looked at the IV he'd removed from jervis that was now in the hazardous waste trash and peeked around the side of him to make sure he was breathing. and indeed he was.
"Oh, frabjous day, callooh callay," Jervis responded unironically in a tone that's dryer than the dunes of the Sahara upon first hearing, but since his and Barton's initial stalemate over the falooda earlier today, there's now a visible gleam of warmth in his tired eyes. The dark gray of his irises brightens slightly behind his glasses as he took a step back from Barton's comatose figure; idly tucking his hands into his pockets as he walked backwards into his corner. "Talk about friends in high places."
As he leaned against the cool wall, he allowed himself a brief moment to breathe, the weight of the situation lifting just enough to let in a sliver of light. He lifted his fingers, took another drag from his joint, watching the tendrils of smoke coil and spin like wisps of white silk buffeted on the wind. The electric charge of anxiety in the room that had begun to reemerge now seemed to be snuffed out, for the second time in as many hours.
It was a wonder his very skeleton and musculature hadn't snapped under the weight. Though Jervis himself bore no physical wounds or signs of violence save for the deep indigo bruise blooming on his jaw - a parting gift from Marty's colleague, he now recalled with a twinge like snakes curling in his guts - his whole form felt battered to its marrow. Every nerve and every hair follicle felt as though they were soaked in a thick sludge of oil mixed with wet concrete.
He tilted his head, his eyes fluttering open as a strand of hair brushed against his cheek. The joint in his left hand continued to shed ash. "Fifteen minutes
 that's just enough time for the body to generate more than 22 billion cells." Jervis was unsure why he had said that, the words spilling out before he could catch them, as if they had a life of their own.
He dragged his boot across the rough warehouse floor, the sound grating against his ears as he attempted to focus amidst the faint echo of dripping water, glanced over at Barton; gauged the shallow rise and fall of his chest, before turning back to Matilda, searching for any sign of doubt or hesitation in her face. "... this person, you trust they'll be able to handle the situation? I shouldn't think there's any permanent damage, but... appearances can be deceiving. And I'm not a neurologist by training; pharmacology and neuroscience was always my purview."
Why are you asking, you idiot? You can't care for these people, you shouldn't care. You don't, really; you barely know them to begin with, and you've stayed here long enough. You've already crossed two lines tonight, so much for Barton's claim of you being "self-righteous".... it's past time for you to go while you're still in one piece, and pray to whatever's out there you never cross paths with anybody named Mathis anytime soon. Let the GCPD or the Bat deal with them.
Even so, even as he deliberated, he knew could only run for so long in Gotham. So the next question was, where could Jervis possibly hide if he actually left the warehouse? Did he take his chances here, on the streets... or Arkham? Even if the situation was deplorable, the stakes nail-bitingly high; the tension in the city now likely rising to a boil thanks to the fallout of his and Barton's actions; his own instincts screaming for self-preservation; that emaciated, unspoken selfish part of him wanting to leave them to whatever came next... to die, to sleep, to dream - as Hamlet had once put it... damn it all... Jervis may as well pry out his own frontal lobes with a rusty spoon, for all the good it would do him. Indecision and exhaustion was calcifying his thought process into a knotted skein.
Maybe Arkham wouldn't be so bad, after all... maybe if they locked him away in some dank, dark hole and threw away the key, forgot about him... Gotham would forget. He would forget. But then the memory of Sylvie and Alice sprung to his mind, as sudden as a hurricane, and he cringed. No. He'd sacrificed too much... lost too much. The city's price for a life in its arms was blood... and it had been paid. And paid. And paid again. With interest, steadily compounding...
... god, he was so tired... Gray spots danced in front of his vision, and the room careened... his whole body lurched, right leg crumbled beneath him like a log burned to the core, and he distantly recognized he was slumping down the wall to the floor. It was his final clear thought before darkness overtook him.
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criminalminds4eva · 2 months ago
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secret polaroids - spencer reid
summary: secretly dating your coworker, when it all coomes to light due to a blurry polaroid
pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader
“wait, whos in the picture behind your phonecase?!”
doctor spencer reid, the genius with an eidetic memory, one of the fbi’s brightest minds, your coworker. who you’ve been secretly going out with for the last couple of months
it all happend over spilled coffee, you had been rushing over to the office, holding cups of coffee for the team working on a case out of town. as a new member of the team you wanted to make a good impression, hell maybe suck up to them a little.
so when you walk in the precint and spill the coffee all over your clothes, the work of a small town cop running into you, spencer offers to drive you to the hotel, to change into clean clothes.
“that was so embarrasing god what an idiot” you said covering your flushed face as spencer drove to the hotel
“the cop ran into you, besides you were doomed from the start carrying 8 cups of coffee in the same hand, and statistically speaking, it's actually quite common to spill coffee, especially when multitasking or under stress, the brain can only process a limited amount of information at once, which leads to small errors in motor control.” spencer looked over at you and chuckled
"you know it amazes me how much information you have stored up in your brain, i mean i know about the phdÂŽs and everything but still its so amazing" you said looking over at him as he parked in front of the hotel, you can see his cheeks start to form a little red to them and naturally yours do too
and after that, a couple of weeks later full of small glances, smiles and of derek telling him how painfully obvious it was that he likes you and liked him. he asked you out
"you know people who share common interests and engage in meaningful conversation tend to form stronger connections and, well, i really enjoy talking with you, so i was wondering if you'd like to have dinner with me sometime? i promise i won’t ramble about statistics the entire time" he said as he tried to hide the blush in his face so the rest of the team wouldnt know what the both of you were talking about in your desk
"spence, id love nothing more than to hear you ramble over dinner"
one dinner became two then three, then you found yourself kissing him goodnight as he dropped at the door to your apartment
he leans in slightly, hesitating for a brief moment, as if calculating the perfect timing and then gently kisses you
"i really enjoyed tonight" you said after the kiss "would you like to come in for a drink?"
he pauses for a moment, trying to think clearly then says "id love too"
after a while you both end up getting wine drunk in your apartment floor, which leads to the decision of your bringing out your polaroid camera
"come on spence smile for the camera" you laughed trying to get him to take his hands off his face but he wouldnt so you snap the picture anyway
"alright enough, your turn" he said taking the camera from your hands and taking a couple of pictures of you.
he wobbles a little setting his wine glass down in the counter, eyes half-focused but full of affection. "you know,ive been thinking, well, not just tonight, but, like a lot. you’re amazing and smart, and funny, and so beautiful and i think your definetly out of my league and if i were to kiss you then go to hell, i would. so then i could brag to the devils i saw heaven without entering" He fumbles over his words, blinking slowly, but his sincerity is clear. "maybe you could, um, be my girlfriend? statistically, we’re, uh, compatible, and I think we could you know be really happy together what do you say?" he offers a lopsided smile, clearly a bit nervous despite the alcohol.
his rambling takes you back "did you just quote shakespeare to me?" you chuckled as you leaned in to kiss him once more
"is that a yes i take it?" he said kissing you back
"yes doctor reid, i want to be your girlfriend" his eyes wide open to your response, and for a moment hes speechless, he laughs nervously rubbing the back of his neck and grabs the camera once more
"come on we are taking our first official dating picture" he smiles shyly but brightly taking a blurry polaroid of the two of you in front of the mirror
the two of you knew it was better to keep the relationship private, spencer's face flushed when you mentioned the thought of how derek would tease him, or how he wouldnt hear the end of it from garcia being all happy for the both of you. knowing they wouldnt do it to harm either of you but since this was quite new and being coworkers, you decided to keep it private but not a secret. the team knew spencer was seeing someone, emily said his face seemed brighter and suddenly he couldnt stay overtime to finish the files jj had sneeked him in his desk. and they knew you were seeing someone too since garcia said she caught you smiling while you were texting, they hoped you guys were seeing each other but since neither of you ever mentioned the date or maybe it was the fact that you really were able to mantain a professional front while working, they hadnt been able to fully catch on that you were dating spencer
that was until you decided to put the blurry polaroid of the night he asked you to be his girlfriend behind your phone case
"wait who's in the picture behind your phone case?" penelope squealed with exciment catching the attention of the rest of the team
"is that your boyfriend y/n, do i officially have no chance with you" chuckled derek leaning against your desk as you nervously took your phone from garcia
"oh come on now she will tell us when she wants too" emily approached then took your phone from your hands "besides you cant really tell who it is in the picture" as she looked at the picture trying to figure it out despite your efforts to take the phone from her hands.
derek stood beside her also looking at the picture "hey but doesnt it kind of look like.."
"morning what are we looking at" spencer appeared at your desk, his face blushing when he saw the picture emily and derek were looking at, they looked at spencer, then looked at you burying your face in your hands
"oh my god, no way really?!?" garcia said with a bright smile "doctor love oh my god i cant belive it" she said hugging spencer
"so i guess the cat is out of the bag huh?" you said looking at spencer
"you owe me 20 bucks i told you they were dating" emily said playfully punching derek in the shoulder
"wait you guys had bets on this" spencer said laughing nervously letting go of the hug with garcia
"well pretty boy we didnt actually think you would even ask her out how long has this been going on for" said morgan looking playfully hurt "baby girl let them breathe" he said pulling garcia from you
"a couple of months" you mentioned letting go of the hug with a cheesy smile
"alright, we have a case" said rossi joining the team by your desk. the team grins weider as they notice spencer blushing as he stands next to you "were really happy, for the both of you" said derek as they started to walk away. you get up from your desk following the team and squeeze your boyfriends hand, a signal that all was well
"did you really think we wouldnt figure it out?" rossi raised his eyebrows as he looked at spencer watching walk away while the team playfully teased you "im happy for you kid" rossi patted him on the back
spencer shakes his head with a half-laugh trying to hide the blush in his face as they joined everyone.
â‹†ïœĄÂ°âœ©
a/n: feedback would be super appreciated, i hoped you enjoyed reading <33
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prongsx · 2 months ago
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who are your boyfriend?
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Even though you talk a lot about your sweet boyfriend, people don't understand the sign.
Warnins: English is not my first language, there will probably be mistakes, I'm more grammatically correct in my language I swear lol, f!reader, just a silly idea I had.
You're a person who talks a lot about your boyfriend, not that it's your intention to show him off or look like you're obsessed with him (maybe a little), but still, it seems inevitable to quote Jason Todd in your social circles, especially in the work.
It's a good work environment, your colleagues are nice, and you like to be communicative. However, the new co-worker, Adam, seems to be a little too friendly, your colleagues have already noticed this, but you dont notice this, lost in your own thoughts about your boyfriend.
The thing is, Adam has concluded that your boyfriend is an idiot, he listens to you talking about him, and the only conclusion he can draw is that you're dating a stupid nerd who lives in his mother's basement. It started weeks ago when you arrived with a jar of colorful cookies, offering it to your colleagues with a silly smile and saying.
"Jaybean did, does anyone want it? It's his grandfather's recipe"
Adam laughed internally at that. It wasn't right, you were too pretty to date such a weird guy who was definitely supposed to be short, skinny and silly, what kind of man cooked colored cookies? Or even worse, let yourself be called a "jaybean"?
The next day, he overheard you talking to your friend, in a worried tone, about how your boyfriend was about having physically fought with his younger brother, which only added to the comical image Adam had of his boyfriend. Definitely the guy was a banana. What kind of guy would let his little brother hit him?
Around the football season, Adam decided to show you what a real man was and ask you out, showing you the tickets he got. He called you a doll, which you registered with a slight frown.
"um, thanks Adam, but my boyfriend doesn't like football very much. And this week we're going to an arts fair in New York."
Adam let out a stilted giggle that you didn't seem to notice, the thoughts of him again calling your boyfriend stupid. Seriously, art fair? Didn't like sports?
There were other, clearer signs of how pathetic your boyfriend was, according to Adam, like when you commented that he had sewn a blouse of yours. (you didn't say that Jaosn's talent with sewing came from the fact that he sewed his battle wounds himself). Or when you called him cute nicknames.
Adam wanted to show you what he really wanted to date a guy, a real man, who had muscuslos and knew how to beat someone to protect you.
The fuse for Adam was when he approached your desk and saw a book by Jane Austen and asked, avoiding making a face at such a syrupy book.
"Do you like classics, doll?"
You looked up from the computer where you typed, a slight smile on your lips as you stared at the book brevmenete.
"A little. My boyfriend likes it, so I promised I'd try to read it. I prefer fiction books"
Adam's face drooped, you were really dating a stupid guy, you deserved to meet a real man. He rested his hands on your desk and puffed out his chest.
"You know, doll, you can get more."
You blinked your eyes limply, confused.
"Excuse me?"
"There are men
 for real."
There was an arrogant smile on Adam, which you didn't like, not at all. Your posture became tense, prepared to reject him, by hook or by crook. But a voice, hoarse and thick, woke you both from the uncomfortable exchange of looks.
"Am I getting in the way?"
Adam turned, his eyes narrowing at the sight. There was a tall guy, much taller than himself, who even in a leather jacket could see his muscles. The guy had messy black hair and scars that gave him a tough look, even his blue eyes seemed like a warning, a warning to stay away. Adam was about to ask what he was doing there when your voice came out loud and contented.
"Jaybird!"
Adam stood still, his mouth wide open as that intimidating man gave you a soft smile and squeezed your waist, a chaste kiss on the forehead. By no means was that guy stupid of your boyfriend.
"That's adam," you said, a half-annoyed expression on my face, which softened when she turned her eyes to Jason.
Jason just gave Adam a suspicious look, not bothering to spend time with him before grabbing your bag and giving you another kiss on the cheek, whispering.
"Ready to go, honey?"
You nodded, smiling. Saying goodbye with a slight nod to Adam, as you told for your sweet, gentle boyfriend about your day, whose acts were what really drew you in.
Just a silly thing I thought about while analyzing the things that betrayed me about Jason. Adam is just one of those guys who think women are attracted to things that – they – think should attract them. Jason is just a grandpa's little boy who has learned how to be a gentleman right under that rough surface.
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celandeline · 4 months ago
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The Throne Was Meant For Us, My Dear
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Aemond x Targaryen!Reader, mostly canon compliant (yes, people are still dying/getting maimed), heavy on the smut, incest (they are targaryens, obv), a little angst
9.5k words (buckle up)
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You were born at the end of a long summer’s day, just as the last sliver of sun was sinking below the waves of the bay. Your sister was born on the same day, just after the sun had completely disappeared below the horizon. Twin Targaryen girls, Helaena and Jaenara, the second and third of Alicent Hightower’s children. 
The summer has always held a special place in your heart - not only because of your nameday, but because of the way the heat of the day lingers in the air long after the sun has set. The sound of a warm breeze as it rustles through the courtyard flowers, spreading the lovely floral scent. The feeling of the sun on your skin - the taste of fresh fruit grown outside the city. You’ve always loved the summer. You love it especially now, the only thing making this godforsaken funeral bearable. 
Next to you, Aegon snags two more glasses of wine from a passing serving girl, handing one to you with a limp wrist and a sigh. He downs half his glass in one long draught. “I don’t understand why Helaena.” He grumbles, gesturing to where she sits on the ground with his glass, the wine sloshing inside. “If I must marry at all, why not you?”
You take a long sip from your own glass, leaning back against the store railing overlooking the sea. Driftmark, while much more drab than the Red Keep, has one thing going for it - the pleasant smell of salt in the air, and the sound of the waves against the shore. “Our mother thinks that if we were to be wed, I would enable you.” You say. 
Aegon snorts, finishing off his drink. “As if Helaena will do anything to stop me from my hedonistic desires.” He jokes, quoting Alicent. “If it’s not to do with grasshoppers, it’s not to do with her.”
You neglect to snicker along with him, simply pressing your lips to the rim of your glass as you watch your dear sister pass a spider back and forth between her hands, muttering under her breath. She’s always been something of a dreamer, your Helaena, something the rest of your family doesn’t seem to notice. But you, always in tune to your sister from the moment you were born, know. Threads of omniscience run through her mutterings, though deciphering them sometimes is beyond you. 
“Some could say the same about you, with wine and whores.” You say, glancing knowingly at Aegon. “We all have our compulsions - some worse than others.”
“I only jest.” Aegon says, defensive. You can tell he’s getting drunker, his movements becoming more loose, his words louder. 
“Hm.” You finish your glass, setting the empty cup on the railing beside you. “Is it truly in jest if you are the only one laughing?”
“Perhaps it is better that I marry Helaena instead of you.” Aegon says, leaning close enough that you can smell the wine on his breath. “You do have a way of inciting my annoyance, Jaenara. No, I do not think you would make a good wife.”
You lean even closer, all too ready to play Aegon’s game. Your teeth scrape over his ear as you retort, “No, you’ve always liked the ones who won’t fight back, haven’t you?”
The tension breaks as Aegon laughs, tossing his head back as he steps away, putting a respectable amount of distance between you again. You chuckle as well, until another voice - softer, younger - cuts through your chortling. Aemond.
“What’s funny?”
Aegon, not subtle at all, rolls his eyes. “Nothing.”
“We were just discussing Aegon’s betrothal.” You say, shifting so that Aemond can lean against the railing beside you. You’ve never understood Aegon’s disdain for your baby brother - something your nephews seem to share. “Or rather,” You cast a joking look to Aegon. “Aegon was complaining about it.”
“‘Tis your duty.” Aemond says, ever so serious. 
Aegon rolls his eyes again, gesturing widely at Helaena. “Look at her.”
“Aegon-” You start.
“I would do my duty, if only mother had betrothed us.” Aemond retorts. 
Aegon flaps a hand. “The both of you.” He dismisses, eyes scanning through the thin crowd. “I’m going to get more wine.” And with that, he’s gone, sliding between chatting relatives in the wake of a serving girl, chasing after the wine she carries. 
You place a hand atop Aemond’s head with a sigh, gently carding it through the silky silver hair there. “He can be such an ass, our brother.”
Aemond looks up at you with a thin smile. “Mm.”
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The blood on your hands is not yours, but your brothers, smeared across your forearms from when you’d clutched his face in your hands, holding closed the gash across his eye with your thumbs as the maester stitched the wound back together. Now, he smears tears and snot across the bodice of your gown, the good side of his face pressed against the thin fabric of your nightclothes as he clutches you with shaking hands. 
Your mother is screaming. Aegon is huddled against the wall of the room, no doubt already suffering a hangover from how much he drank. Helaena stands to your left, her eyes fixed on the wall behind the scene before her, gaze absent. You watch in horror as your mother wields a knife against Rhaenyra, spitting insults like venom. Ser Cole is pressed almost chest to chest with Daemon. Your little nephew, Lucerys’ face is bloodied. 
You have no idea what happened. But Aemond is missing an eye. And Vhagar is now his dragon, instead of Laena’s daughters. You knew - known, now - that his lack of a dragon had always been a sore spot for Aemond, but you never would have guessed that he would go to such drastic measures to claim a beast of his own. And Vhagar, no less. 
You expect him to cry, to whimper in pain, to react, but he just holds onto the gauzy fabric of your nightdress and keeps the unmarred side of his face pressed close to your chest. Hiding, almost. 
You soothe a hand down his back, pressing him closer. “It’ll be alright.” You say, your voice lost amongst the carrying on. It won’t be. He’ll be scarred forever, he’ll have to re-learn how to walk, how to write, how to do anything that requires vision. It’ll take him years to recover fully. 
“I know.” He says, voice soft. Level. Even. 
And it’s his calm reassurance that makes you believe your own words. It will be alright, one way or another. 
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Hand in hand, you walk your brother through the halls of the Red Keep, towards the training yards, for his swordsmanship lessons. Servants and nobles alike avert their eyes as you pass, some out of respect, some out of disgust. It’s true - the scar across Aemond’s face is nothing delightful to look at, a motley of yellow and purple swollen skin, the scabs leaking pus. But you do not look away. He is your brother, and he receives enough torment from Aegon already. 
He clutches your hand tightly, holding it like a bannister as he puts one foot in front of the other, his good eye steadfastly looking ahead. Sometimes his balance sways (especially around turns or on the steps) but he’s getting better. “You’ll be able to come and go as you please again soon.” You say, not bothering to hide the pride in your tone. 
He scoffs. “I can’t stay a cripple forever.”
Aemond was never sweet. But the loss of his eye has only soured him more. You roll your eyes, teasing, “You’d do well to save your bitterness for someone who’s not capable of causing you to fall down the stairs at a moment's notice.”
It’s supposed to be a joke, but he doesn’t laugh. “Apologies, sister.” He mumbles.
You sigh. “I only joke, Aemond.” Aegon has ruined him, picking at all of his insecurities without remorse until he bristles at the slightest hint of humor, thinking an insult is coming. 
His good eye shifts away from the hall in front of him for a moment to cast you a sidelong glance. 
“Not all of us are Aegon.” You insist, rounding the corner with him to step outside into the afternoon sunlight. Ser Cole is already waiting, whirling his sword from hand to hand idly as Aegon straps himself into his practice armor. Aemond lets go of your hand as soon as he sees Aegon, taking shaky steps onto the field proper, alone. 
Aegon pays him no mind, his gaze falling on you. “Jaenara. Come help me.”
“Your lack of manners is appalling.” You say, walking over to him anyway, taking the leather straps of his breastplate from him and tightening them over his shoulders. “What would mother say?”
Aegon just grins. “Meet me tonight.” He says, his voice dropping into a more conspiratorial register. He doesn’t have to say where - you’ve snuck out with him before. You know the route. “A traveling troupe has arrived in Flea Bottom, supposedly.”
“Sunset?” You ask, dropping your hands from the straps on his shoulders to the ones near his waist. 
“Mm.” He watches you work, still grinning. 
“Alright.” You say, stepping back. 
His grin widens into a smile as he twirls his sword. “What fun we’ll have.”
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The sun has begun to light the sky when you stumble back into the Red Keep with Aegon, giggling under your hoods as you sneak past the white cloaks back to your chambers. Really, it can barely be called sneaking anymore - you know they see you return, you know they saw you leave. The only reason they don’t trail you through the streets of the city is because Alicent doesn’t know, and hasn’t ordered them to, so why do the extra work? 
You sway into Aegon’s shoulder as you walk, all the wine that you drank making your head spin. Taking you by the arm, he only makes it worse as he begins to waltz you down the hall, jauntily humming the same tune you’d been dancing to in a tavern earlier. Laughing like a fool, you tip your head back and let him dance you about, until he deposits you against the wall by your bedroom door, caging you in against the stone. 
You know he’s going to kiss you - he always does, at the end of the night. Gently, he presses his lips to yours, and you smile into it. He doesn’t kiss you like he kisses his whores - nor do you kiss him as you do yours. It’s a chaste thing, only a moment before you’re both pulling back to look at each other. 
“As sweet as wine.” He whispers.
“Mm.” You bite your lip in a grin. “Goodnight, Aegon.”
“Good morning.” He giggles, pushing away from the wall to stumble back to his own bed. 
You slip into your own room, dropping your cloak and dress from your shoulders, one after the other, as soon as you are inside. Just in your shift, you turn to flop into the soft comfort of your bed, only to see a lump under the covers that wasn’t there when you left. Slowly, you peel back the sheets to reveal Aemond, face pressed into your pillow, soundly asleep. 
You can’t help the smile that spreads across your lips as you climb into bed beside him, doing your best not to disturb his slumber. He stirs anyway though, good eye cracking open with a jolt, softening when he realizes it’s you. Extending an arm, you make space for him to curl up against your chest, and he does, tucking his face under your chin.
“You were with Aegon.” It’s mildly accusatory, but mostly sleepy.
“Mm.” You don’t deny it, stroking a hand through Aemond’s hair. “And you were here. In my bed.” You press your nose to the top of his head. “What troubles you, Aemond?”
“My eye.” He says. “The pain. It’s more than just the skin, it
 it stabs me through the skull, sometimes. Makes it hard to fall asleep.”
“We will see the maesters in the morning.” You say, still gently stroking. “Perhaps they will be able to come up with some tincture to soothe you.”
He lets out a sleepy little hum, and settles more against you. Your own eyes flutter shut, and your stroking hand moves to wrap around his shoulders instead. It’s quiet, for a while, and for a moment you think he’s drifted off, but then,
“Will you take me with you, once?”
“To Flea Bottom?”
“Mm.”
You pause for a moment. “If you wish. Perhaps when you’re a bit older.”
“How old?”
“At least as old as I was when Aegon first took me with him.”
“And how old was that?”
You smile into his hair. “Give it a year.”
“Mm. Alright.”
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The quality of Aemond’s eye improves drastically over the course of a year, so that by the time he dons his own cloak and takes to the streets of King’s Landing with you and Aegon, it almost blends into his face. The scar is a long pale thing that trails down his cheek, and the only part of the injury that escapes the eyepatch. Under the shadow of his hood, it’s barely noticeable. 
He trails a half-step after you and Aegon, clearly unsure. You don’t blame him, it’s quite a change from within the walls of the Red Keep, but an exhilarating one at that. Arm in arm, you and Aegon lead the way, moving smoothly through the crowds to one of your favorite haunts, a little brothel tucked away near the edge of the city. 
You can hear the sounds of pleasure emanating from within before you even step foot in the building, and the area around the door is crowded with hangers-on, men who can’t pay their whores dues. Aegon pushes through them all easily, and you glance back to make sure Aemond isn’t lost before following him inside. 
The place reeks of incense, barely covering the smells of sweat and sex, but it’s familiar to you. On instinct, your eyes scan the crowd of the main chamber, searching for your favorite whore, a beauty named Falyse with long lashes and plump lips. You can feel Aemond pull closer to you in the presence of such debauchery, and you glance down at him again, to find him already looking at you. 
“This is a brothel.” He says.
“Aye.” You grin, glancing at Aegon. 
Aegon smiles wide, clapping Aemond on the shoulder. “Tonight is the night that you become a man, brother! Your first taste of the best pleasure the world can offer.”
Catching sight of a familiar shock of black hair, you turn, meeting Falyse’s eyes through the throngs of men. “I must take my leave.” You say, petting Aemond’s head. “But you are in good hands with Aegon. And I won't be far.”
“Alright.” Aemond says. He’s still unsure, clearly, but there’s no time for hesitation once Aegon’s swept Aemond up in his frenzy. You slip away, weaving through the writhing bodies until you reach the other side of the room, where Falyse is pouring a glass of wine for another patron. She’s barely clothed, so you can feel the goosebumps that rise when you snake an arm around her middle and rest your chin on her shoulder. 
“Princess.” She greets you with a sultry purr. 
“My lady.” You return, laying your lips in the junction of her neck. “I’ve missed you so.” 
She’s quick to pull you away from the main room, behind a thick curtain to an empty bed. It’s a familiar dance that you do - she makes a show of ridding you of your clothes, running her soft hands up and down your body until you’re dripping. Then she lays her mouth on you - her wonderful mouth that could pull honey from even the most stalwart of noble women. She never lets you rest with only one peak, no she delights in working as many from you as she can, until you’re pushing her away. Then it’s your turn to return the favor, licking at her until her sweet moans fill the air and you can feel her clenching around your tongue. You’ve earned her devotion in that way - on more than one occasion, she’s confessed that no man has ever thought of her pleasure, on their own. 
“Well, I am no man.” You’d responded. 
It’s an exhausting affair, this dance, so it often ends with you curled around her on the bed, listening to her share the latest gossip of the smallfolk whilst you twist her hair into intricate braids, the kind only Targaryens wear, a sign she’s been with royalty. You’ve just finished your handiwork, laughing along to a story about the smallest cock she’s ever seen, when the curtains part, and Aemond slips into the room, clearly close to tears. 
Immediately you sit up, paying no mind to the fact that you’re completely bare. “What’s wrong?”
Holding back tears, he hesitates for a moment before climbing into your lap, pressing his face between your breasts with a shaky sigh. You clutch him to you, guilt and regret sinking into your heart. Too young. He’s always been more sensitive than you, or Aegon, you should have waited to include him in your revelry. Too young, too young. 
Falyse sits up as well, raising a questioning brow. You shake your head, and run your fingers down your brother’s back. For a while, the room is silent as Aemond’s breathing calms, and then he pulls his face away, sliding out of your lap to sit next to you instead. Looking down, he hides behind long curtains of hair, but not before you catch a glimpse of his expression. Shame.
Gently, you break the silence. “Aemond, this is my friend, Falyse. Falyse, my dear brother.”
Falyse smiles warmly, peering underneath Aemond’s hair. “A pleasure to meet you, my prince.”
“You must tell him what you were telling me.” You say. “Oh, it’s hilarious, Aemond, you must listen.”
He perks up slightly, as Falyse starts her story again - and she does get him to laugh, but the hurt doesn’t leave his eyes, and the guilt begins to pool in your stomach. 
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The sapphire is weighty in the pocket of your gown, and bounces heavy against your leg as you rise from the dinner table, dipping your head towards your father before you take your leave, following your siblings out of the hall. Aemond’s nameday feast was a small affair, per request of the prince, and he only received books from both of your parents - leatherbound histories of Valyria that look entirely too large in his little arms as he carries them back to his bedroom. 
“Aemond.”
He turns at the sound of your voice, and you pluck one of the books from his hold, tucking it under your arm. With your other hand, you pull the sapphire from your pocket, and hold your closed fist out to him. “Here.”
Looking at you curiously, he holds out a hand, and you drop the sapphire into it. “A sapphire.” He says. 
“For your eye.” You explain. “I had the masons fashion it so that you can slide it into the socket. I thought it might suit you.” Jokingly, you add, “And perhaps improve your standing with the court ladies.”
He huffs out a little laugh, examining the gemstone with a careful eye. “Thank you Jaenara.”
You smile, reveling in the first laugh you’ve won from him in a very long time.
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Ser Cole and Aemond behind you, you lead them through the streets of Flea Bottom in the early morning light. It feels like a bit of a betrayal, showing them all of Aegon’s usual haunts, but the situation is dire, and your brother needs to be found. Your father is dead, and it was his dying wish, your mother said, for Aegon to be king. 
The brothel looks different in the daylight, drab and empty. Gathering your skirts in one hand, you bound up the steps to the door and bang the heavy knocker twice on the wood. With any luck, you can get a hold of Falyse - if Aegon was here last night, she will let you know, free of charge. 
It is not Falyse that answers the door, but the brothel Madame, Sylvi. A familiar face to you, albeit one that you have not had the pleasure of knowing under more intimate circumstances. Her eyes scan over your face, and then Aemond and Cole behind you. Stooping into a short curtsy, she asks. “And what can I do for you, my lady?”
“I am looking for my brother.” You say. 
“He seems to be behind you-”
“My other brother. Aegon.” You clarify. “Was he here last night?”
“I’m afraid not.” She says. 
You turn back to face your companions. Cole sighs, glancing around the streets like he might spot Aegon passed out in the mud. Aemond’s eye is on the Madame, a mixture of contempt and something else stirring in his gaze. 
“Where else, then?” Cole asks. 
“I don’t know.” You wrack your mind, tracing through all of the taverns and brothels you frequent with your brother, all places that you’ve stopped before arriving here, all with the same result. “This was the last place I could think of.”
Cole swears under his breath. 
Aemond breezes back down the steps, his mouth set in a determined line. “He must be somewhere. Come, we will try the fighting pits next.”
You murmur your thanks to the Madame before following after Aemond and Cole, worry sinking into your gut. Leave it to Aegon to get swallowed up by the city when the realm needs him most. 
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Meleys’ breath washes over you as you stare down the dragon’s maw, expecting to see the glow of fire any moment, signaling your end. There is no time for action - in the few seconds you would have before flame reached you, there is no way you could reach your own dragon, Vermithor, to have any hope of combatting Rhaenys. Instead, you grasp Helaena’s arm and try to ignore how your hands shake. 
Aemond steps in front of the both of you, obscuring your view of Rhaenys atop her dragon with one hand on his sword. As if something as feeble as that will do anything against a dragon. 
You wait, feeling your sister with whom you shared your mother’s womb tremble underneath your grasp. 
You wait, watching Aemond’s shoulders rise and fall with each breath in front of you.
You wait, watching as your mother steps in front of Aegon, one hand wrapped around his wrist like a vice. 
A tidal wave of relief floods through you as Rhaenys pulls at the reins, and Meleys backs off, slipping through the doors of the dragonpit just before they swing closed, casting the room into semi-darkness. Alive. You’re alive - as is Helaena, and Aemond and Aegon. All of you, alive. You watch your mother almost fall to her knees as the relief washes through her, and then you are wrapped up in Helaena’s arms as she crushes herself to your chest. You return the hug with vigor, your eyes finding Aemond’s over her shoulder. 
Alive. Alive. Alive.
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Something is happening. They’ve been locked in the small council chamber even since Aemond returned from Storm’s End. It’s been hours since your brother dismounted Vhagar, soaked to the bone and looking more shaken than you’ve ever seen him. You have no idea what happened, or what’s being discussed. Now, more than ever, you curse not being born a man. 
Still, there is nothing to do but wait. 
So you do, steeping in the burning hot waters of Aemond’s bathtub, idly flipping with damp fingers through a series of poems you’d found in your great-grandfather Jaehaerys’s saddlebag when you’d claimed his dragon. Some of them you recognize as things he’d copied from other poets, some are his own musings about his wife, Alysanne. He wasn’t half bad, in your opinion. 
You snap the booklet closed as the door to the bathroom opens, and Aemond slips inside, still dressed in his soaked riding leathers. He stills when he lays eyes on you, obviously not expecting anyone to have been waiting for him. But you just smile, and set your book aside. 
“I had them draw a bath.” You say. “I figured you would want a soak, after flying in the rain. Scalding, of course.”
He smiles, and starts on the buttons of his overcoats, the fabric falling to the floor with a wet slap. His trousers are next, and then his eyepatch, set on top of your book before he slides into the bath behind you with a sigh, his head falling back against the edge of the tub. 
“Very thoughtful of you, sister.” He says, eye fluttering shut. 
“Mm.” You turn around in the tub, collecting a rag that you’d draped over the side and dipping it into the hot water, beginning to run it over his skin that isn’t submerged. For a moment, the only sounds are the echoes of droplets falling back into the tub as you wash him, until you speak again. “What business kept you in council so long?”
A tension settles in his jaw. “Lucerys Velaryon was also at Storm’s End.”
“You failed to win their allegiance?” You ask, surprised. 
“No. Lord Borros was easily won when I promised myself to one of his daughters.” You brother opens his eye. “But Lucerys is dead, at my hand.”
You set the rag aside, your mind spinning. Lucerys, dead. As if things weren’t already pointing towards all out war after your father changed his mind about the succession. “How?”
Something in his expression shifts and for a moment, he looks like he’s about to burst into tears. “Vhagar.” He says, his voice cracking slightly. “I only meant to scare him, but she knows my anger
 I cannot pretend that I did not fantasize about killing him. I did not think that she would
” He swallows, collecting himself. “Our mother is less than pleased with me.”
“Our mother could never understand the bond between dragon and rider.” You say, consoling. You lay a hand gently on his face, over his scar, and run your thumb under the sapphire that sits in his eye. “You cannot be blamed for your anger at the boy who maimed you. Vhagar cannot be blamed for sharing that sentiment.” You pause. “It is a regrettable accident. And I am sorry for Rhaenyra and her children.”
He takes a shaky breath before wrapping his arms around your middle, and pressing his face into your shoulder, holding you to him as tightly as possible. Already wet from the bath, the few tears he sheds onto your skin make no difference. You say nothing, but pick up a comb from the short table beside the tub and begin to work it through his hair. 
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You wake up to a sharp pain in the side of your neck, like the skin has been sliced open. One hand flies to the wound, and the other slips under your mattress, pulling the long dagger you keep there free of its sheath in a smooth motion. You sit up, the knife brandished before you, only to find your bedroom empty, the only motion being that of the curtains fluttering from the breeze of your open window. 
You pull your other hand away from your neck, expecting to see blood. Your palm is blank, the skin unmarred. In the reflection of your blade, you inspect your neck, only to find nothing. A phantom wound, perhaps from a dream. Anyone else would have simply gone back to sleep. But this is not the first time you and your sister have shared each other’s injuries. 
You rise quickly, knife still in hand as you dart from your chambers, heading down the hall at a quick clip. It’s eerily empty - not a white cloak in sight. Something is wrong, you’re sure of it, the echo of your footsteps on the stone only serving to further put you on edge as you approach the nursery. The door stands ajar, flickering candlelight seeping out into the hall from within. 
Slowly, carefully, you peer around the door. The room is empty - silent. The door creaks as you edge your way inside, turning to glance at the children’s beds. It is then that you see it - the headless body of your nephew, blood still seeping out of the stump of his neck into his bedsheets. Your blood runs ice cold, and then burning hot as rage fills you. Your gaze drops to the blood spatters on the floor, little droplets lead out into the hall. 
Readjusting your grip on your dagger, you break into a sprint, following the trail. 
Your bare feet slap in harsh rhythm against the stone, your eyes flicking back and forth from the floor to the hall in front of you as you follow the blood splatters. It is too late now. Jaehaerys is dead already, but you have to do something, you must. You can see candles being lit as you whip past door after door, the Keep slowly waking as the horror sets in, but you do not stop. 
You do not stop even when you turn an ankle as you round a corner, because there he is, a tall man in a hooded cloak, a burlap sack tightly clutched in his hand, blood dripping through the fibers. Stumbling, you push yourself back up with your hands, and with a mighty scream, leap at the mans back, knocking him forward. 
The bag tumbles to the ground, and Jaehaerys’ head rolls out, jaw slack and eyes wide. 
“The fuck-” The man growls, knocking you from his back. You fall to the ground, but force yourself to your feet again, diving forward, your dagger poised to strike. Bigger and stronger than you, he grabs your wrist, bending the bone until it snaps. Tears flood your vision as the pain washes over you, but you do not stop. Gritting your teeth, you drive your dagger into the soft skin of his side, between where his ribs end and his hips begin. 
He groans, releasing your wrist, and you leap at him again, clawing at his face as you sink your teeth into the side of his neck, biting as hard as you can. You can feel the blows he’s raining on you, but you hold on, savoring the taste of his blood as it floods your mouth, coppery and strong. His hands wrap around your broken wrist, and you wail again, your voice muffled by his skin in your mouth. 
But then there are hands around your waist, and the clank of armor fills your ears. Two white cloaks tackle the man to the ground as Aemond pulls you from his grasp, pressing your back to his chest. 
“Kill him!” You shout, eyes locked on the man as the guards beat him into submission before hauling him up to his feet. “Kill him!”
“Jaenara.” Aemond’s voice is low in your ear. “The maesters
”
You try to shake him off, but your brother doesn’t relent, gently steering you away from the guards and little Jaehaerys’ head on the floor, back into the relative calm of the halls. As the adrenaline fades, pain begins to wrack your body in waves, and you find yourself leaning against Aemond as tears fill your vision. 
“Helaena,” You gasp, chest heaving as sobs build up in your throat.
“With Cole, and our mother. Jaehaera, as well.” Aemond assures you. 
“They,” You say, working around the lump in your throat. “Put a knife. To her throat.” You bring your fingers up to the side of your neck, where the pain had awoken you. “Here.”
“I’m sure she’s being tended to.” He says. Gently, he pulls your arm up, inspecting your wrist, bent at an odd angle and already starting to swell. “We must tend to you too.”
Too exhausted to insist that there are more important things to be dealt with, you let him steer you along. 
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You watch little Jaehaerys’ body bounce with the movement of the carriage in front of you, slightly obscured by the mourning veil you wear. Helaena sits beside you, pressed between you and your mother, eyes firmly pointed up at the sky. She’s empty, you can feel the echo of it in your own body, as you’re sure she can feel a hint of the festering anger you yourself are harboring. 
It will only be a matter of time now, before you don your armor and mount Vermithor for battle. You pity the fool who will fly to meet you. 
The wails of the smallfolk fill the city streets as you pass, petals filling the air as they toss handfuls at the carriages, shouting their grief in harmony. The news of Jaehaerys death had swept through the city like fire, just as your grandsire had suggested it would. Now, more than ever, the smallfolk hated Rhaenyra - there would be no public protest of the war that was brewing. 
But you cannot help but feel angered by the whole thing as your little nephew’s body shakes with the movement of the carriage in front of you. To be reduced to a martyr, at such a young age. And knowingly, by his own kin. It is an ugly, ugly thing. 
Helaena’s eyes finally drop from the sky, and your mother shifts, extending a hand to touch her arm. Helaena shrinks away instinctually, leaning further into you, and you shift, allowing her to press herself against your side, her head falling into the crook of your neck.
You do not need to speak to know what she is thinking. You rest a hand on the back of her head, and let her curl into you, feeling her heartbeat against your own. 
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“Cole and I will cut them off entirely.” Aemond says, laying another marker on the map, over Rook’s Rest. “And with Rhaenyra confined to Dragonstone, it should be simple enough to take Harrenhal without interruption.”
You let your gaze sweep over the map, stopping at each marker Aemond had put down. “A clever plan.” You agree. “And Aegon also approves?”
Aemond scoffs at that, leaning back in his chair, the light from the fireplace dancing over his face. “What does it matter?”
“He is the king.” You say simply, lifting your gaze to look at your brother. “It is his war that we fight.”
“He is a figurehead.” Aemond says, rising from his seat to circle around the table, coming to stand behind you. “At the hands of our mother and grandsire. His only purpose is to lend them free reign.”
“He is our brother, and liege lord.” You say, standing from your own seat and turning to face him. “You speak treason, Aemond.”
“Mm.” Aemond hums, eye drifting over your face. “I forget, sometimes, that you are partial to him.”
“He is my brother.” You repeat. “And my Helaena is his wife.”
Silence permeates the room, and for a moment, the only sound is that of the crackling fire. But Aemond’s soft voice breaks through again. “Did you ever let him fuck you?”
The question takes you aback, and you laugh. “What?”
“In all your whoring together, did you ever let him fuck you?” He asks again, unwavering. 
“No.” You say. “I have no taste for his particular flavor of depravity.” Not that Aegon ever tried, either. That wasn’t - isn’t - the nature of your friendship. 
“Hm.” Aemond hums, turning back to the map sprawled across the table. “Vermithor will be needed to secure the Riverlands.” He continues, like the discussion never strayed from battle in the first place. He leans over the map, tracing a long finger over the stretch of the reach. 
“Of course.” You agree, confused. 
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It’s been too long since you last did this. 
Wine flowing through your veins, you walk arm in arm with Aegon, leading the way to the old brothel, his friends and squire - the reason for the night - behind you. The crowd parts as you step through the brothel doors, a hush falling over the gathered patrons. The quiet only lasts for a moment before whispers take its place, hushed words about the king himself being a patron tonight. 
Aegon, of course, pays these whispers no mind, dropping your arm in favor of grasping his squire by the shoulders, speaking grandly about the pleasures of manhood. It makes you think of a similar night many years ago, when you’d brought Aemond to this very brothel. Guilt floods you for a moment, but is quickly quelled when soft hands wind over your shoulders, and a sultry voice whispers in your ears. 
“Princess.”
You turn, delighted to see Falyse - delighted enough, that with the wine already in you, you plant a wet kiss to her lips before resting your forehead against hers. “My sweet lady, my own heart.” You croon. “It has been far too long.”
She laughs, raspy and seductive, her eyes crinkling at the edges with her smile. “I did not know that all three of you would be joining us tonight.” She says, winding her arms about your shoulders. “Just like when you were younger.”
“Mm.” You find yourself agreeing before her words really register. “Wait, three? Is Aemond-?”
But it’s too late, you know it is as soon as Aegon’s raucous laughter booms through the room. You turn away from Falyse, finding your brother amidst the crowd, having abandoned his squire in favor of sinking next to Aemond on a bed, a wide grin crawling over his face. 
You can’t make out what he’s saying, but you can see Aemond shrinking in on himself, curling away from the Madame, who he’d been laying with. Winding Falyse’s hands away from your shoulders, you bring her knuckles to your lips, pressing a kiss there. “Another time, my lady.”
“Of course.” She says, understanding flashing across her gaze. 
You push through the gathered patrons towards your brothers, but Aemond meets you halfway, stalking through the crowd naked as the day he was born, clearly fuming. He pauses when his eye falls on you, clearly not having expected you to be here as well, and you watch his lip tremble ever so slightly. But he does not cry. 
“Aemond.” You say, unsure how to broach the subject. 
“Jaenara.” He returns, icy.
A pause stretches between you, and Aemond turns to leave, but you grab his arm, stopping him. “Come back home with me.” You say. 
You think he’ll spurn you, hiss some insult that’s more for Aegon than for you, but he sighs, “Fine.”
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He does not speak to you until you stand at his bedroom door. You feel as though you should say something, apologize on Aegon’s behalf in some way, but you don’t get the chance before Aemond is beckoning you into his chambers with a quiet, “Come.”
You do, not realizing what he wants until the door is shut behind you and you’re pressed against it, your brother's lips pressing insistently into yours. You only hesitate for a moment before kissing him back, giving him what he wants. He melts into it, softening as he realizes that you won’t reject him, cradling you into his arms. 
When he pulls back, his voice is breathy. “I’m going to kill him.”
It sends a spike of fear through you, thinking of one brother killing the other, but the look in Aemond’s eye leaves no room for doubt. “I’m sure you will.”
Apparently the correct answer, Aemond resumes kissing you with a fervor, steering you away from the door and towards his bed. “I’ll kill him,” He says, rushed between kisses. “And without an heir, I’ll take his place.” His hair tickles the side of your face as he presses his nose into your neck. “Make you my queen, as he had Helaena.” He nips at the thin skin, making you hiss in pain, pulling at his hair. 
He lifts his head as he pushes you down onto his bed, crawling over you. “You’re betrothed to another.” You say as he begins to pull at the laces of your dress. 
“As are you.” He responds. You bat his hands away from the laces as soon as you hear fabric rip, and begin undoing them yourself. “Both empty promises made by our grandsire for armies.”
You shimmy out of your overdress, and kick it off the edge of the bed, left in your shift. Aemond strips himself of his shirt before tugging at the hem of your slip, urging you to take it off as well. Before long, you’re both naked, and he’s hovering over you again, trailing his nose along the swell of your breast. You take the opportunity to free him of his eyepatch, enjoying the glitter of the sapphire you gave him. 
His eye finds yours as he quietly asks, “Will you let me?”
As if you really even have a choice in the matter. “Yes.”
That’s all the permission he needs to lift your hips with one hand and slide his cock into you with the other. You wrinkle your nose as the sting of the stretch as he works himself into you, his eye fluttering shut. With a deep groan, he begins rocking himself in and out, grinding into you slowly. It’s not the most pleasure you’ve ever felt (no, he would be hard-pressed to compete with Falyse), but it isn’t unpleasant. 
You relax into the bed as he begins to fuck into you in earnest, whimpering to himself as he takes a breast in his mouth, lost in your body. You suppose you should have expected something like this, eventually. It was odd, that he’d asked if Aegon had ever fucked you, but you hadn’t thought that he himself wanted to. Now, his intentions in asking seem obvious.
He releases your breast with a pop before tucking his face against your neck, words trickling directly from his lips to your ear. “My Jaenara
” He moans. “Always so good to me. So kind, so sweet, so fierce. Hm.” He pants heavy, his hips knocking against yours frantically. “Seeing you covered in that mans blood, the chunk you ripped out of his neck with your teeth
 my dragon.” He croons. 
You wind a hand into his hair, wincing as your wrist twinges in pain. It’s gotten better under the maester’s care, but it still complains when you move it in certain ways. The pain vanishes quickly though, and you begin to stroke Aemond’s hair just how he likes, pressing your lips to his temple. 
He whimpers again, almost like he’s in pain. “I will put us on the Iron Throne.” He swears, voice breathy. “Our dragons will burn Rhaenyra and her armies alive, and it will be our line that continues the tradition of our ancestors.” He all but growls it, snapping his hips with such force that you have to stop yourself from slamming into the headboard. “I swear it to you.”
“Aemond.” You gasp, overwhelmed with the vigor of his thrusts. The last thing you would have expected was for Aemond to get you to peak, but you can feel yourself getting closer, the combination of his rough fucking and devoted words stirring your insides. 
“Tell me that you are mine.” He says, demanding and begging at the same time. You can feel him losing his rhythm, pleasure no doubt creeping up on him the same as it is for you. 
“I’m yours.” You swear. “I’m yours, Aemond.”
He whimpers, and it’s the whining sound that sends you over the edge, your body tensing in his hold as you clench around him. With a loud gasp, you come, and Aemond’s thrusts reach breakneck speed. 
“You’re mine.” He whispers in your ear. “Mine, mine-” He comes with a rough groan, pressing his hips to yours and holding them there. He sinks into you immediately, collapsing onto your chest, his breath coming in pants against your skin. 
You bask in the quiet of his room as his cock softens within you, mind spinning as you take in what just happened. “Did you mean it? All that you said?” You ask softly, stroking his hair again. 
“Mm.” He affirms, sleep heavy in his voice. 
You say no more as he drifts off to sleep on your chest, cock still inside you. He intends to make you his queen. To kill Aegon and take his place. 
You love Aegon, you do. He is your brother, and one of your closest friends. But you would be lying if you said he was a good king. Perhaps it would not be so bad, if Aemond were to take his place, especially with you at his side. 
But does Aegon really deserve to die?
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Aemond is insatiable now that he knows you won’t spurn his advances. You can’t say that you mind too much. 
Your elbows resting on the table before you, he takes you from behind as you both pore over a map of Westeros, markers indicating where your forces lay. A letter from Ser Cole sits open on the table beside you, informing Aemond of his most recent conquest as he nears Rook’s Rest. You run your fingers against the wood of the table, moving pieces along the map like chess, the sounds of Aemond’s breathy groans and the rustle of your skirts shifting as he takes you the only sounds in the room. 
“You will have to - ah - take flight on Vhagar soon then, if you are to meet Cole at Rook’s Rest.” You say. 
“Hm.” Aemond’s hips smack into yours as he leans over your back, moving the piece that symbolizes Vhagar to the edge of the crownlands. “The conquest should not take more than a day. Any longer and I would send Aegon in my stead - I would be loathe to leave you.” He jokes, pressing his nose against your neck. 
“Mm.” You hum, letting him stretch you further across the table and angle your hips to better receive his thrusts. Planting his hands on your hips, he pulls you back to meet each snap of his hips, the map forgotten as he pleasures himself with your body. There’s something intoxicating about his unwavering devotion, something rewarding. It feels like all the time you spent comforting him as a child is paying off; after all, he intends to put you on the throne. You wind a hand behind you to caress his cheek. 
He melts into the touch, extending his body over your back, pressing himself to you completely. It’s intoxicating, the power you have over him. The simplest of touches, the softest of words, and the most fearsome dragon rider in the world bends completely to your will. 
“You must tell Aegon of your plans.” You say, laying your head down on the table to peer at the man behind you. 
“He will no doubt find out on his own.” Aemond says. “Either way, they don’t involve him. Rook’s Rest is nothing Cole and I cannot take on our own.”
“And if someone were to show you the same insolence if you were the king?” You retort, biting back a gasp as his thrusts increase pace. 
“When.” He corrects, almost growling. “When I am the king. And I would exile them for such an insult.”
“Yet- mm, Aemond, ah - you do not fear such retribution from Aegon.” You say. You know he’s getting close, his soft pants turning into longer whines, his fingers digging into the soft flesh of your hips. You clench as tightly as you can, reveling in the breathy moan you pull from him as he stills, hips still pressed against yours, spent. 
You feel him make himself comfortable against your back, not bothering to pull away just yet. “Our brother is a fool, not fit for the duties of the crown. How can one be expected to respect such an undeserving monarch? No,” He says, pressing open-mouthed kisses onto any patch of your skin he can reach. “We will be much greater.”
It’s treason, even just entertaining thoughts of taking the throne from the rightful king, but the more Aemond speaks of it, the more you find yourself indulging in the fantasy. Never before did you truly consider what it would be to be queen, but after truly thinking about it, you find yourself enchanted with the idea. With anyone else, you have no doubt that you would have been subjected to the life your mother lived, but as Aemond’s queen, you would have more power than any woman before you. 
“You sound so sure already.” You tease, pushing yourself up on your elbows as he slips away, tucking himself back into his trousers and pulls your skirts back down over your legs. 
“That is because I am.”
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Aegon presses his face into his hands, groaning. While he’s not looking, you slide the wine decanter away from him. Full when you sat down, it’s almost empty now, most of the contents having been poured down the kings throat. He’s been drinking more, in the aftermath of little Jaehaerys’ death. You can’t blame him, of course, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t concerning. 
“They plot behind my back.” He says, his face still hidden in his hands, his elbows resting on the table. “Aemond. My own hand - and our mother, she
” He trails off. “They mock me. Think me an idiot. I cannot
” He reaches for the decanter, only to find it missing, and lifts his head out of his hands. “My wine.”
“Perhaps you’ve had enough.” You say, doing your best to be firm. 
He looks at you blankly before gesturing for the decanter again. With a sigh, you fold, sliding the container across the table to him. Let him drink himself to death if he wishes - it would be a better end than whatever Aemond is planning. 
It’s hard to look at Aegon, knowing that your other brother is plotting his demise. He doesn’t deserve to die, not after all he’s been through. Sometimes, you think you know Aegon better than yourself. You’ve seen him at his drunkest, in the streets of Flea Bottom, at his most desperate before his coronation, at his lowest, after the death of his son. He never asked for any of this. He never asked to be king. He doesn’t deserve to die because of a crown he never desired. 
But one cannot simply resign from the throne. 
You watch as Aegon empties the rest of the decanter into his glass, and then misses the table as he sets the pitcher down, shards shattering across the tiled floor. He stares down at the floor, eyes blank. “Ah.”
“Aegon.” You groan. 
He flaps his hand. “Someone will clean it up. Someone always does.”
“Perhaps it is behavior such as this that deters Cole and Aemond from sharing their plans with you.” You say, utterly annoyed at your brother’s actions. 
Aegon scoffs. “As if you weren’t also kept in the dark.” His eyes lazily slide to yours, and you don’t look away quickly enough, it seems, because he catches it in your gaze. “They told you? And not me, their king?”
“I cannot help that our brother seeks my opinion on such matters.” You say. 
“Then why didn’t you tell me?” Aegon demands, angrily rising from his seat to level an accusatory finger at you. “You are supposed to be my closest confidant, I expect you to be on my side-!” He cuts himself off. “But no. Of course not. As soon as Aemond gets his claws into you you’re just like the rest of them.”
“Aegon,” You try, placating. “I meant no offense. In fact, I urged Aemond to tell you himself-”
“No, no, you cannot fool me again! I am not as stupid as you think me to be, I am not.” He shouts, harshly backing away from the table as you rise from your seat. There’s an anger in his eyes that you’ve never seen directed at you before, and it gives you pause, guilt and shame sinking into the pit of your stomach. What were you thinking, going behind his back like this? He is your brother, one of your closest friends, your king. Curse Aemond and all his sickly sweet words. 
“Aegon-”
A loose hand thrown up in the air, he silences you with a harsh glance before stalking out of the room, leaving you alone with the shattered pieces of the decanter for company. 
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Aegon returns to you on a litter, melted into his armor by dragonfire, barely conscious. The smell of charred flesh and dragon blood fills the hall as the kingsguard rush him to the maesters, and you press yourself as far into the wall as you can to let them pass. There is no rage in you, only shock and despair. You had not thought it would be so soon, that Aemond had his revenge. 
“Jaenara.”
You turn at the sound of his voice, and he stops in front of you, pulling off his riding gloves and tucking them into the pocket of his leathers. There’s an energy about him that you haven’t seen before. Leftover adrenaline crackles over his skin, the pupil of his good eye blown wide, almost lustful. 
“What have you done?” You demand, cringing at the frightened quality of your voice. 
“What I planned to do.” He says, taking you by the arm. “Are you not delighted? Aegon is indisposed, he will be crippled for the rest of his life - however many short years he has left, in this state. None will stand in our way.”
“I
” You aren’t sure how you feel. Aegon isn’t dead, but he will be in incredible pain for the rest of his life. Likely, he won’t be able to walk on his own, or ever ride his dragon again. It is an awful fate for someone you love. But you cannot pretend a part of you - the same part seduced by Aemond’s ambition - isn’t elated at the downfall of the king. 
“Come.” Aemond says, tugging you away from your palace pressed against the rough hewn stone of the Keep walls. You fall into pace beside him, stumbling over your own feet as you process how reality is shifting around you at this very moment. Aemond and the council will have to speak on Aegon’s behalf, puppeteering him even more so than before. You are one step closer to ascending the throne. Your brother is half-alive, melted into the armor of his namesake. 
You don’t realize where you are until Aemond is pushing you down onto his bed with one hand and rucking your skirts up around your waist with the other. He does not wait for you to react before he scoops your hips up to insert himself into you, groaning in relief as he slides home. “My queen.” He gasps throatily, pillowing his face in the crook of your neck. “Have I pleased you?”
“Mm.” You hum, unable to say the words ‘yes, of course’. It proves to be enough though, for Aemond sighs again, slowly beginning to grind his hips against yours. It’s more fervent than his usual fucking, spurred on by the bloody battle he’s just come from. You can smell the smoke in his hair from where it lays across your face. 
“It will not be long now,” He says, breathy and rough. “Soon, you and I will sit the throne. Have our own heirs - will you give me an heir?” He asks. “Will you give me more than one?”
“As many as you’d like.” You choke out. There isn’t another option for you now, not with Aemond so intent on having you by his side when he takes his place as king. As you’re sure he will. 
“We will put Jaehaerys and Alysanne to shame.” He declares, placing his hands under the small of your back, causing you to arch against him. Holding the tops of your hips, he fucks you against him feverishly. It does not take long for him to finish, already keyed up on the high of his plans coming to fruition. 
He collapses against your chest with a heavy sigh, and instinctually, you wrap your arms around his shoulders, carding your fingers through his hair. 
“I love you.” He whispers against your skin. 
It’s the first time he’s said the words aloud, though you’ve known it for a very long time. Of course Aemond loves you. 
“As I, you.” You return. 
What you can’t decide, is if you feel the same.
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recycledraccoon · 7 months ago
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Minor thoughts on Oisin and how he seems primed to fuck over Adaine specifically. The flustered ping-pong balls that were a plan all along. The quoting her own words on the previous Elven Oracle back at her in regards to the storm.
I mean...imagine you're a skinny little dragonborn wizard, in a class with a cute elven girl. You don't talk to her, but one of your adventuring party members is pissing thinking that party is getting preferential treatment, so you KNOW about her. You watch from the corner of your eye or from a spot on the back of the class whenever she's actually there. Partway through the year she goes to jail, and when she comes back she and her adventuring party save the world from a dragon. (A dragon of whom your Grandmother had been fond. ((Also, coincidentally, the Vice Principal.))) One of them created a god.
(Your entire party is being groomed into rage by two of your teachers.)
You're in her class again. She is the Elven Oracle, already an accomplished adventurer. She and her friends are popular. She's very pretty. She does not know your name. She does not know who you are, just a skinny dragonborn a few seats back.
You go on your Sophomores Year Spring Break Adventure and don't bother to think about her party at all.
(You and your party are going to kill a god. Your teacher is going to ascend to godhood in their place and you and your party will have Made That Happen. You are angry and determined with each final blow you deal.)
You return from Spring Break angry and with a sore chest.
You find out the elven girl's party has resurrected a dead god and the live streamed the entire fight. They must think they're so much better than you and your party. You'll show them.
(Your friend refuses to change her faith. She cancels the paperwork. The rest of you kill her, confident she will make the right choice and join you again as a proper Champion for your new god. You help kill her. She does not get back up. You hide the body and none of you can say anything. You're so so angry.)
The world descended into darkness and you can do nothing. The sun finally breaks across the sky again right before Junior year. You and your party have made plans and are on the cusp of greatness. You've gained muscles to spare and ink on your scales in carefully selected runes, no longer just a skinny little dragonborn.
(You have a new cleric. He's not your friend. He's a haystack hick from that cult-church from Freshman year, and he's here because the god you're going to kill needs a Champion and he fits the bill, nothing more.)
The first day of school the plan starts to be put in motion. Immediately that party of kids is interfering, in your way. It rackles. You push on anyway, seething inside even as you act the part of being reasonable.
You go to a party at the houses of one of her friends. You've been practicing making spell runes on the inside of ping-pong balls. You're ready.
The pretty Elven girl in your class finally looks at you. She approaches you, gives you a drink, and chills it in your hand. She has to ask your name. You have shared certain wizarding classes with her since Freshman year, tho she was barely there. You have to tell her that.
You chat. She clearly gets flustered, calls you great, and flees back into the house. Your friend teases you for others to overhear. It's a convenient excuse to use your geometry and apply physics to miss every single shot and lay your trap. The drink isn't so perfectly chilled in your hand anymore.
(You talk to her. Play nice. She isn't smooth, but she smiled at you and maybe a part of you is vindictive in seeing her flustered. It's a shame she turned down the diamonds, as dragon madness would have been so poetic. You steal her summons to steal something from the house. She didn't know your name. Didn't remember you. You feel justified. Your anger burns cold like frostbite, like static in the air. You purposely don't wonder if that first miss was intentional or genuine.)
You see each other in class sometimes.
You plot and kill monsters the woods. You will win the battle. You will win the war.
Your parties have a standoff in the cafeteria. You play your part to diffuse the situation, your teacher has been harping on your friends to stop antagonizing the other party. You feel her mind touch yours gentle probing of intentions, her friends all around her as you lock eyes.
(The devil's honey your group gets from that bee girl all goes to your teacher. He is preparing himself to ascend to godhood, and he needs it for his prayers.)
She is searching for your intentions and feelings. You tell her only 'Sorry'. She believes you. You are not entirely sure why. She and her party will hopefully die during their Last Stand exam, and have no way to revive themselves in time, be trapped there until after elections.
Maybe she just wasn't perceptive enough to see the deception.
(You hate her and all her friends. You have had no devil's honey. She believes you. Briefly, you wonder if it was a lie at all.)
They catch you. They know. Your team goes to ground and waits out the remaining days 'til elections and the culmination of everything you've been working for.
It rains at the party, and you have no more masks. You are angry. She must never have been that good of an Oracle at all, and you take joy in mocking her with her own words from long ago.
She's nothing more than an elven girl in your class who was full of herself to remember your name.
(There is nothing left now to stop you from being as openly angry as you like.)
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strawberrykake · 8 months ago
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“Look At Your Girl
.” Prank
“You see how good she looks? Now imagine another guy enjoying her, you not meaning shit to her anymore. Exactly, get your act together.”
>>warnings: Tsukki -> suggestive, cursing
Kageyama, Tsukishima, Atsumu, Hinata
Kageyama
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Kageyama was busy preparing his busy volleyball schedule for the next week
It’s been a while since you’ve spent quality time together
So in order to get his attention, you slump beside him with your phone in hand
Sensing your presence, he places an arm around your waist.
“Hey, baby.” He pecks your cheek.
“Hi.”
Without any warning, you play the audio:
Look at your girl.
He looks at you, then at your phone then back at you, confused.
You see how good she looks?
A blush starts to form on his cheeks and his lips curve up into a smile.
Now imagine another guy enjoying her

His grin immediately drops at the horrifying thought of someone else being with you
“Hmmph.” Kageyama pouts, hearing the rest of the audio.
His grip on your waist has gotten tighter.
“Get up.” He motions to his lap for you to sit on and you gladly hop on.
You can’t stop smiling at his cute little pout.
It was hard to resist a kiss as you leaned in to give him a peck.
You feel his hand move behind your head, bringing you closer and preventing you from pulling away
The kiss lingers a little longer than you intend it to.
“Tob—” He enters his tongue, shutting you up.
He kisses you as if reminding you how much he loves you.
His hands cradle your face as you tightly wrap your arms around his neck.
After a heated make-out session, Kageyama pulls away with a smirk on his face, feeling satisfied with the dazed look on your face
“Tobio
”
“Let’s go out for dinner tonight. On me. I’ll treat you.”
You giggle and it makes his cheeks flush even more.
At the end of the day, you are his and he is yours. he knows that. just likes to be reminded
Tsukishima
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“What is it?” Tsukki asks when you approach him slowly on the bed.
He was busy reading a book. He leaves the book open faced down on top of his broad chest.
He leans against the palm of his hand, elbow bent and muscles bulging.
Of course, it’s a habit for you to lay next to him, placing your head on top of his tricep.
“Listen to this!” You pull up your phone to play the audio and Tsukki remains silent to listen.
Look at your girl. His eyebrow raises, looking sideways at you.
You see how good she looks? He nods, giving an impressed look.
Now imagine another guy enjoying her, you not meaning shit to her anymore

His face contorts into disgust.
When the audio ends, he picks his book right back up and adjusts his glasses.
No more words exchanged. Nothing.
“Uh, Kei?” You scoff, rubbing your nose against his arm
he ignores you
“you’re annoying” before getting up to leave.
“Aht. aht. aht. Where do you think you’re going, baby?”
“Finding another guy cuz it seems like I don’t mean sh—.”
“Don’t finish that sentence. It’s far from the truth. You know it.” Tsukki practically throws his book to the side, not caring if he lost the page he was on.
“I do. But
”
“But what?” He moves closer to the edge of the bed where you stood, taking your hands in his and kissing them.
“Tell me,” he says against your skin.
“I— I—” Instead of saying anything, you press your lips against his.
You can feel his smirk against your lips.
“If.” Kiss. “You.” Kiss. “Wanted.” Kiss. “To kiss.” Kiss. “Just tell me, baby.”
His lips move towards your neck and you feel his arms pull you in close before falling against the bed.
“I want a kiss,” you say shyly.
He chuckles, nipping your ear.
“Okay, pretty.” Tsukki turns you both over, so that he’s on top.
Before giving you a kiss, he stares at you.
And your eyes tell him that you were longing for more than a kiss tonight.
He definitely feels the same way.
Atsumu
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“hmm?” He asks mid-crunch on some chips he was stuffing into his mouth
you were simply watching some videos on your phone while cuddling atsumu when he overheard the quote
“You see how good she looks? Now imagine another guy enjoying her, you not meaning shit to her anymore. Exactly, get your act together.”
“who th’ fawk is talkin? what does he know about whats mine?” he says with his mouth full
You giggle
“Who’s that, baby?” He keeps asking
“just some internet guy, love”
Atsumu turns on his side to pull you in closer.
“get off it. n pay attention to me now”
You raise your brow. “I thought you’re watching sports
” you say as the tv continues to play a live soccer game
“It’s not even volleyball. It’s okay baby. C’mon..” He puckers his lips, making you squeal and push him away.
Your actions make him pout.
“Whats up? I dont mean shit to you anymore?” He mocks the person from the video.
You giggle. “You have garlic cheese breath.”
“I’ll brush my teeth if thats what it takes to get a damn kiss from ya” He excitedly hops up from the bed.
You slapping his butt as he gets up from the mattress makes him raise a finger at you (as if he isn’t used to it)
Hinata
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“You see how good she looks? Now imagine another guy enjoying her, you not meaning shit to her anymore. Exactly, get your act together.”
“Man
” *Hinata says his voice cracking up. Your playful smile disappears.
“Wouldn’t that be a-awful
”
You look at him apologetically.
“Aw baby
that’ll never happen”
Hinata looks dead at you in the eye
“No. tell me. Am I a good boyfriend? Be honest. I can use any critique I can get!”
You sigh
“You’re the sweetest, most loving boyfriend ever. I don’t wanna trade you for anything or anyone, understand Sho?”
He bites his lip, suppressing himself from crying.
“I-I love you, y/n. I mean it.”
You wrap your arms around his neck tightly.
“Well I love ya forever, my sunshine boy”
He holds you close, breathing you in
There’s nothing that feels as good as hugging this man
“Fuck, let me kiss you” *He whispers lowly, already claiming your lips before you get a chance to comprehend his words
You lose your sense of thinking whenever he kisses you
When a small whimper leaves your lips, he chuckles
“Don’t need anyone to tell me how good my baby looks”
And you’re in for an intense love bombing for the next couple of weeks
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vyva-melinkolya · 1 month ago
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we all agree that the push towards short form, vertical video (tiktok/reels/shorts) is ruining fucking everything right? Tiktok has been useful for the dissemination of political information (e.g Gaza) i’ll give it that, but that feels moreso a result of meta and twitters algorithms being just a little *more*’evil and censor happy. And i want to make it very clear that my hatred for tiktok has nothing to do with the fact that it was a product of a Chinese company, because i see a lot of critiques relying on some sort of sinophobic conspiracy. On the contrary, it’s what tiktok has become in the vacuum of western popular culture and marketing that makes me fearful.
I know that every generation faces a new, polarizing technology and inevitably, there are those among said generation who will critique it. That is the nature of things. However, there is also something to be said about how, with the acceleration ïżŒof technology (running parallel to the acceleration of capitalism, acceleration towards collapse etc), each coming generation faces an increasingly more malevolent “advancement”. TLDR, i’m going to talk my shit.
I’m going to speak on the aspect that is most relavent to me, as a musician. I am petrified by what short form video is doing to music and to musicians. I think that tiktok provides the illusion of making music and being a musician more “accessible” while actually pouring gasoline on the fire that the pop music machine had already started. Standards for what popular culture “expects” from music are being doubled and tripled. Let’s talk about song length. Success and marketability favoring shorter songs is not something new, it has been the trend for decades. But with short form video, it goes even further. You’re not just hearing the same song over and over on the radio, you’re hearing the same 15-30 seconds of the same song over and over again. This in-turn, starts to influence the way people write music, persuading people to make songs that *could* have that 15 second appeal. There is an art to pop music, there is an art to writing a catchy hook—this is something else. We weren’t meant to hear or understand music like that. There are so many songs from reels that i found annoying, until i heard them in their full context. It’s insidious. It makes everything feel like a fucking commercial, even if nothing is being advertised.
I’m going to pull directly from someone else’s experiences, someone who’s music seems to be everywhere on short form videos. The ambient musician My Head Is Empty has a hundred million streams on the song “i was only temporary”. Despite that exposure, they experience “never ending copywrite issues” and have “received death threats” by people who refuse to credit them when using their song. Pulling a quote here, from a comment on their own post
“vyva_melinkolya unfortunately it just gets worse. i saw a bot content page that steals pod cast footage and spams dozens of videos with my song stolen, comment on a "motivation" spam content , who actually made a post telling people the name of my song, and the previous page i mentioned, the pod cast spam commented on that video saying "Bro stop don't give out the sauce. this audio helps me pull numbers brooo" - so people are actively INTENTIONALLY stealing it and telling people to not credit me. like. u can't make this stuff up”
Beyond this, My Head Is Empty feels frustrated that despite all this exposure, the rest of their work (nine albums) as a musician remains under appreciated, and i think that frustration is 100% valid. People cannot fully appreciate music, or even understand it as a work of art created by another human, when it’s taken so far out of its context. Again, the soul being sucked out of art by “the machine” isn’t anything new but, this is a whole other level. Being a musician is more expensive than ever, streaming earns you fractions of a cent etc, it all feeds into itself.
When a song or a musician i love deeply finds its way on to tiktok (let’s use Duster’s “Stars Will Fall”, one of my favorite songs ever as an example)I am not upset that i cant “gatekeep” it anymore. I’m not upset by the idea of something I love and hold dearly finding a larger audience. I AM upset in the manner in which it is being disseminated. I’m upset with art I hold dear to me being chopped up and used as “trending audio”. When I saw Duster in concert recently, lStars Will Fall” was the song I was most looking forward to hearing. It was the last song they played, and it was the song seemly everyone chose to talk loudly over. The audience was mostly people my age and younger. This complaint might come off as petty or pretentious or cliche, i frankly do not give a shit.
Let’s talk about how musicians are expected to promote music on tiktok/reels. This is a matter of opinion, at the risk of sounding very pretentious: the “POV we are x band from x” “My label says i need x followers before x” “posting this video until c musician notices me”. I understand that some of it is in jest but, what the fuck? When did this become the norm? I do not blame anyone for promoting their music like this, but we should want more for ourselves. I’ve always said being a musician is deeply embarassing, inherently. If being a musician is inherently embarassing then what is this? I dont have a solution for this, and the music industry has always been ugly and bloodthirsty and seldom fruitful— but i feel like the very small amount of dignity we had as artists is now lost and I cant fucking stand it. Artists seem to promote the same single with dozens of reels over the course of months, hoping that something sticks. I dont want to sound like i’m shaming or, again, sound like i can provide a solution. I’m just very fucking sorry that it seems like this is “the way”. And personally, i’m scared that if i dont “get with the program”, im going to fail.
Again, all of this speaks to larger trends in entertainment industry and even larger trends in capitalism. But i’m just airing specifics right now because frankly? I cant take it anymore.
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xosamioo · 12 days ago
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Can you do a riki fic where the members give him and reader the talk but thay have already had sex
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“𝐓𝐡𝐞 đ“đšđ„đ€â€
Idol bf! Riki x enha members x female Reader
WC: 700
Very unserious and chaotic. ( jays face kills me in this pic ^)
“So
 we need to talk about something important,” said Heeseung, sitting down on the long couch in the living room. The rest of the members and you sat in the other seats beside him. There was a serious and almost somber look on his face as he glanced towards Riki sitting right beside you. Riki glanced to the side before returning his gaze to the boy who sat before him on the couch. “Sure
 what is it?” he asked, his expression and voice also becoming serious.
The rest of the boys either stared at him or you, none of them saying a word. It was as if they were waiting for one person in particular to speak up and start the conversation. Finally, Jake leaned forward on his seat, his hands clasped together. “We all need to talk to you about something serious. It's about you and y/n,” he said, his tone serious. Riki slowly nodded. “Okay, what is it?” he asked, confused about what this could be all about.
“It's just
” started Jay, pausing for a moment, “We have all noticed that you both have been extremely close with one another lately,” he said, his eyes looking deep into Riki's. Riki shifted his gaze to you, then back to the boys. “Yeah. So? She’s my girlfriend”
“That’s exactly what we need to talk about,” said Jay. “I think you know what we’re talking about.” the other members nodded along. Riki sat there, still confused for a moment before realization slowly hit him he began to connect the dots and realize what this conversation was all about and laughed out loud.
“Oh
 oh, you’re talking about “that”?” he said, laughing again. The tension in the room was starting to loosen as Riki knew exactly what the boys were getting at. Heeseung sighed. “Yes... we are,” he said, rubbing his forehead.
“Seriously? We all need to have “that” talk?” Riki said, sitting back on the couch, leaning his head against the wall behind him. “Come on. We’re both adults, you guys don't need to give us ‘the talk.’” He said, using air quotes.
Jake shook his head. “adults or not you both are still teens” he said, his voice serious again.
Riki rolled his eyes, “Please... We’re 18. We know what we’re doing.”
“I don’t think you do.” said Heeseung, “That’s actually what all of this is about.” the rest of the members nodded in agreement.
Riki chuckled slightly “You think we haven’t already done “that”?” he asked, his tone nonchalant as ever looking over to you. “Riki you little-” you smacked his arm
The rest of the members either groaned or face palmed in a sort of disappointed but not surprised way “Bro for real?” asked Jungwon, looking over at him. Riki nodded. “Yup.” he said, casually leaning his arms on the back of the couch, “I told y’all there wasn’t a need for ‘the talk’.” Jungwon said shaking his head “Ight I’m out but use protection please don’t be more irresponsible than you already are”
Jay and Sunghoon got up out of their seats. “Ugh, I can’t believe you did-“ Jay said, putting his hands on his hips in a sort of “mom” like fashion, “Oh god-“ said Sunghoon, he buried his face into his hands as he turned and walked out of the room. The room was left with Sunoo, Jake, Heeseung, You, and Riki sunoo was just enjoying the show laughing with Jake, and Heeseung just looked traumatized.
“Jake sighed clapping his hands and standing up walking to his room “Well riks don’t forget to pull out”
“JAKE!” Heeseung yelled out plugging his ears and running away. “we didn’t need to know that!” Sunoo was leaning against the side of the couch laughing.
“You’re all useless man,” Riki said shaking his head, Sunoo was cackling at the other member's reactions. “god I hate you,” you said rolling your eyes at Riki
“Oh come on,” he said moving his arm down to wrap around your waist and pull you closer to him.
“You have no shame I swear” You shook your head looking at him.
“Never said I was sorry,” he said as he pulled you closer facing him and gently kissing your lips
You sighed and kissed back, Sunoo stopped laughing and fake gagged in the corner leaving to his room.
—————————————————————————
Author note: LOL I hope you guys enjoy this short one!! Thanks for 200+ followers đŸ«¶
© xosamioo 2024 do not repost, plagiarize, or translate.
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mysillycomics · 10 months ago
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Hi everyone! This is Claire. I am writing to let you all know that we did it. We saved Bailey and Tiger Fluff, and we all live together in an apartment in Illinois, my home state. We really, really did it!!!
You can read our thanks, thoughts, and more under the read more :0)
(note: Oliver also goes by Bailey! She has two names.)
There are many important people on this journey that we would like to specifically thank.
First, all of our friends (especially Peregrine, Sophie, and Jackson) who were there on the day Bailey was evicted, who listened to me and helped me figure out what to do when I felt more lost than I’ve ever been. Without them we wouldn’t have been able to act so quickly and efficiently. Because of them, we were able to formulate a plan.
Speaking of Jackson, he and his partner Cherri need to be thanked once again. Jackson drove all the way from his home, Bailey’s motel, and back to get both her and Tiger to a place to stay while we figured out what to do next. They provided a warm, quiet, and safe place for both of them in a time when something like that was so far away. For the first time in a long time, I knew that Bailey was truly somewhere safe. For that, we will be forever grateful.
While we do not have their names, we would like to thank the staff of the airport and airline who helped make this journey objectively possible. They also made Tiger into a little celebrity on the flight, and everyone, including the pilot, went to greet her and congratulate her for being so brave. She really is the bravest little kitty we know.
Next are my very close friends Elle and Callan, who invited Bailey and Tiger to stay at their house not far from mine while we secured a place of our own. They, like Jackson and Cherri, gave both of them the space to simply be. I was able to visit a couple of times, and being with my favorite people made an extremely difficult time so much better. It made me think “this feeling is what we are fighting for”.
Finally, we’d like to thank you.
To all of you who read and shared our story, you helped us to feel seen and heard and not alone. Reading words of support in the comments, quote retweets, and tumblr tags truly made me feel like we could do this with everyone cheering us on.
To everyone who donated, your generosity this financially possible. As of writing, we received $19,381 from the GoFundMe. We are now able to use the rest of funds that have been tucked away in savings for rent, food, and bills. I cannot overstate how grateful we both are. What you did for us will never leave our hearts.


While Bailey and Fluffy were at Elle and Callan’s, we found an apartment. It was small, but perfect. We toured. We applied. And we got it.
And on December 9th, 2023, we moved in and started living together! Our goal, our dream, our driving force for so long was achieved. After three years of long distance, we finally made it.
Our home is small, and has some quirks as all homes do, but it’s ours. The love of my life, the best little cat in the word, and I are all together. We are safe, warm, happy, and loved. The future we fought so hard for us now the present. Forgive me for being long-winded. I just have so much to say about all of this! Sometimes I still can’t believe that we actually did it. But we did, we really did!!!
I’m going to keep the GoFundMe up for a little bit, but once things settle more I will close donations.
Thank you!!!!!!!!! 🧾💕
____
Hey everyone Bailey here, I cannot overstate just how grateful I am to every single one of you and how thankful I am that this journey has been able to come into fruition. It was very scary being in that motel not having a plan or knowing what I was gonna do next while everything was crumbling around me. If it wasn't for Claire and our incredibly kind and caring friends I don't know what I'd do. They helped me press on and get through this with Fluff and we finally did.
Finally we're in a place that brings nothing but peace and comfort, my anxiety has dropped and I'm doing things I've never thought possible and building up strengths I never knew I had, I feel whole in a way that I've never felt before and I'm just, happy.
I am so grateful to have Claire, for years she's been so supportive and comforting and has brought this dream we've had into reality and every day I am so thankful to have her, she is the love of my life and my best friend. The life that her, myself and Fluff now share will forever be together and we can finally begin living. 💚💜
Thank you everyone, thank you to our friends who let Fluff and I into their lives to be able to be safe while we get our bearings, thank you to everyone who said such kind and wonderfully compassionate words, cheering us on as we go, every day I was looking at the community post I made on YT and it was just filled with people being so supportive, and thank you everyone who donated and got us into where we are. We could not have done it without all of you. 🐟 ❀ 🐟 ❀
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daddy-dotcom · 1 year ago
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Bang My Line
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Summary: You're Penelope Garcia's first intern, and you learn a lot more from her than just her technical skills.
Rating: M
Words:4, 357
Warnings: Fluff, typical canon violence mentions, smut ;)
*reblogs or comments r much appreciated*
Read my newest fic Scents and Sensibility out now đŸ€­
_____________________________________________
The first day was a blur. It was scary enough to completely change career paths, but working for the FBI was an entirely different beast. Between what seemed like hundreds of background checks and interviews, I finally made it to my first day. Granted, I would just be an intern for now, but hopefully this would lead to a permanent position as a technical analyst. I waited in the lobby for Penelope Garcia, the woman who would be my mentor for the duration of my time with the BAU. We had spoken over the phone and even texted back and forth a bit, but this would be my first time meeting in person.
“There she is! My shiny new intern.”
“Hi you must be Agent Garcia,” I replied with my arm outstretched. She took it and gave what was the most enthusiastic hand shake I’ve ever seen.
“Oh honey, I’m way too fun for you to call me agent. Call me Penelope.” I shook my head in agreement and she led me towards the elevator.
“I know I gave you a rundown of the team via our text messages, but be prepared for them to ask you a million questions. You’re my first ever intern and they’re dying to meet the newest member of the team.”
“Duly noted, just know I’m going to be doing the same to you Penn because I’m a little out of my element here.”
“hmm Penn, I like the sound of that.”
As the elevator doors opened, I could see the rest of the team gathered around a desk, too focused on their own conversation to notice me and Penelope.
“Everyone, please welcome my first and only intern (Y/N).”
The man in the crisp black suit stood up first to greet me and introduced himself as Agent Aaron Hotchner.
“Penelope has not shut up about her new intern so it’s nice to finally put a pretty face to the name. I’m SSA Derek Morgan.”
I let out a bashful chuckle as I shook Morgan’s hand. Penelope did warn me that he could be a bit of a flirt. I was then greeted by a blonde woman who goes by JJ and an older man named Agent Rossi.
“Don’t tell me you write in pink sparkly gel pen too?” he jokingly asked.
I smiled and shook my head no, before being greeted by Agent Emily Prentiss.
“Don’t mind Rossi, it’s always nice to have another woman on the team to keep these boys in check.”
She gestured towards Morgan and the other agent beside her, who I can only assume is none other than Dr. Spencer Reid.
Penelope had described him as quote “Steven Hawking trapped in a young Bill Nye’s body.” What I didn’t expect was for him to actually be attractive. Sure, Agent Morgan and even Agent Hotchner were easy on the eyes, but Spencer Reid was strikingly handsome in the most unassuming way. The soft golden waves that covered the top of his head combined with those puppy dog eyes were enough to remind me how nervous I was to be joining the team.
“Nice to meet you (Y/N)” he said as he took my hand. My palms were beginning to sweat, but the steadiness of his firm grasp eased my nerves.
“Likewise,” was all I could manage to say. He held my gaze for what felt like both a moment and an eternity, before releasing my hand.
“Well, (Y/N), let’s get you briefed on your first case,” said Penelope.
I followed Penelope into the briefing room and decided to sit in the seat closest to the screen so that I could take notes on her presentation. To my surprise, Spencer took the seat next to me. As if I wasn't already a nervous wreck, his close proximity to me was going to make my writing even more illegible than usual. Still, I could get used to sitting next to the most handsome member of the team.
As Penelope wrapped up her presentation and the rest of the team departed on the jet, the bubbly blonde gave me a little tour of her office. Rossi wasn't joking about Penelope's love of glitter gel pens, and her desk was adorned with unicorn paperweights and mermaid statues.
"This is your workspace over here, (Y/N), although you'll mostly be assisting me for the first couple of weeks. Feel free to decorate your desk with as many unicorns as you please," she said.
The first hour or so of work was mostly getting situated in my new workspace, but we soon got our first call from the team, and it was from the man himself, Derek Morgan. Penelope pressed the button to answer the phone and his voice immediately came through the speaker for both of us to hear.
"It's your babygirl and her babygirl in training, what do ya need hot stuff?" said Penelope.
"Hey mama, I need you to look into Walter Price's bank activity for the last few months, see if there were any suspicious withdrawals or transfers."
"Anything for you gorgeous"
"Thanks babygirl, I'll be expecting your call back soon."
I sat with my mouth slightly ajar, looking over at Penelope dumbfounded.
"Do you talk to everyone on the phone that way?" you asked.
"Nope, just my sweet lover Derek Morgan."
I paused for a second before asking my follow up question, "so are you two like...in a relationship?"
"Only in my dreams," Penelope said with a wink. I let out a laugh because this whole situation surprisingly made me more at ease in my new job.
"As your intern, I guess it's my job to learn how to answer the phone like you?" I said with a wicked smile.
"Oh no my dear, at least, not yet. We've got a long way to go before you get to my level. And of course you'll have to find your own gorgeous man to talk dirty to, Morgan is already taken."
That definitely wouldn't be a problem, I already had the most gorgeous man on the team in mind.
I spent the next few weeks listening in on Penelope's phone calls and looking up information for her. I even got to help her present a new case to the team. After my first week, the team took me out to celebrate surviving my first case with the BAU. Even though I had become more comfortable around everyone on the team, I couldn't shake the butterflies Reid gave me whenever we interacted. However, I did notice that I was much more confident over the phone than in person. I tried to conceal my blossoming crush on Spencer as best I could, but I couldn't help but be the slightest bit sweeter to him whenever he was the one who called us.
During my second month of internship, we had a particularly hard time tracking down an unsub. Penelope was getting way too many names and she called Spencer to help her narrow down the list.
"There were traces of chlorine and calcium hypochlorite on the body which are chemicals commonly used in pool maintenance, Garcia narrow it down to men over 40 in the area who own pools or work in pool maintenance," he said.
"One name! It's Michael Dunlop, he works as a freelance pool maintenance man and, ooh get this, he hasn't responded to any jobs since the first murder on June 11th."
"Sending the address to your phones right now!" I interjected.
"Thanks (Y/N),"
"Anything for you, cutie" I said, with a sudden burst of confidence.
As I hung up with a satisfied look on my face, Penelope glanced over at me looking smug as ever.
"Cutie huh? That's a new one," Penelope said, "I knew I'd rub off on you sooner or later." And she was right. I started incorporating more color into my work wardrobe and I even brought my tiny stuffed cow to sit at my desk.
"You said I had to find my own gorgeous man to flirt with on the phone...so I did."
"I knew it! You have a crush on our genius boy-wonder!" She was positively giddy just by the thought of it. "I mean he's always sitting next to you and looking over at you when he thinks no one is noticing. You would think in a room full of profilers that I wouldn't be the only one to notice, and yet here we are."
It never occurred to me that my little crush might actually be reciprocated. Spencer was always a bit socially awkward, so I just assumed that he was the same way with me. I never once thought that he was actually as nervous to talk to me as I was to him. This fact somehow boosted my confidence even more, and I decided to have some fun with Spencer over the phone.
---------------------------------------------------------
"Cutie huh?" Morgan asked the blushing boy. Spencer was used to Penelope teasing him, but this was different. He had been harboring a small crush on their newest intern for the past month, and when she flirted with him over speakerphone for Morgan, of all people, to hear, Spencer couldn't help but turn as red as a tomato.
Of course, being a profiler, Morgan took notice of Reid's crimson cheeks. "Call me crazy but I think she likes you, pretty boy."
"O-of course not, she's just copying the way Garcia talks to you," Spencer stuttered.
"That may be true, the only difference is that you have a little crush yourself."
Spencer didn't bother trying to lie since he knew Morgan would see right through him, so he just mumbled something about Prentiss and Hotch needing them at the location (Y/N) sent.
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It was a lot easier to flirt with Spencer when he wasn't physically in front of me. When we were in the office together, we'd shoot each other smiles from across the room or he'd bring me an extra coffee in the morning. But when he was out in the field and I was back at my desk at the BAU, it was a whole different game. I tried my hardest to make him blush over the phone any chance I got, and it seemed to be working. After Penelope found out about my little crush, she decided to play matchmaker and slip Spencer my work phone number to call me instead for information. For the first time, I heard my phone ring instead of Penelope's and I immediately answered.
“Give it to me good baby, what do you need from me?” I replied. I knew it was Spencer since he was the only one who had my number.
"Hey (Y/N)" he said, and I swear I could hear him smiling through the phone. I could tell he had become more comfortable with our one-sided phone flirting over the past month. "I need you to look up all of Dr. Gupta's patients at the psychiatric clinic for the past 3 months, see if any of them drive a black van."
"You got it, gorgeous. If you need anything you know you can always bang my line."
---------------------------------------------------------
“You have (Y/N)’s number?” JJ asked.
Spencer looked puzzled, “Yea.. don’t we all?”
“I think it’s just you pretty boy” Morgan quipped, as he chuckled and gave him a pat on the back.
Spencer had grown fond of (Y/N)'s phone flirtation, but he was too embarrassed to return the favor in front of his colleagues. He loved watching her walk around the office in her high heels, trying to keep up with Penelope's fast pace. He knew brief glances and morning coffees weren't going to cut it anymore, he had to do something before her internship was over. So he decided to call her on his way home from working the case.
---------------------------------------------------------
The team had just finished a case and were on the plane headed back to Quantico. Penelope had plans so she left me to wrap things up in the office. Just as I was making my way towards the door, my phone began to ring. Confused, I picked up the phone and listened to see if it was a misdial.
"Hey babygirl."
I nearly choked when I realized who was speaking. My body involuntarily shivered and my heart quickened its pace. This "babygirl" hadn't come from Morgan, it was Spencer on the other line.
"Hi Spencer! What's up I thought you guys wrapped up the case?" I asked in a confused tone.
"We did, but I thought I'd call you without everyone else around." His voice sounded sultry and silky smooth, unlike his usual rapid rambling, and it made it so much harder for me to speak. "We should be landing in about twenty minutes, stay in your office and I'll meet you there."
"Okay, I'll be waiting here, handsome."
--------------------------------------------------------
Those twenty minutes were the longest twenty minutes of my life. I knew Spencer had a crush on me as well, but what could he possibly want to meet with me for? Was he going to ask me to stop flirting with him on the phone? Was he going to ask me out? Was he trying to make out with me? God I secretly hoped it was the latter...
Just as I had been getting lost in my own thoughts, I heard the familiar voices of the rest of the team down the hall. I knew Spencer would be walking into my office any minute, so I nervously fixed my hair and applied the lipgloss Penelope gave me.
"Hey babygirl," said the tall man standing in the door frame.
"Hi Spencie," I said with a smile as I called him the nickname I lovingly gave him, which I'm sure he secretly hates. I couldn’t help but grin since the word “baby girl” still seemed so foreign coming from his mouth. I stood up to meet his gaze as he slowly made his way over to my desk.
"I know you've been teasing me these past couple weeks," he said as we closed the gap between our bodies. I would say our faces were inches from each other, but he was impossibly tall and my face didn't reach past his chest, "but now its my turn to tease you," he said as he brought his hands behind my ears and pressed his lips onto mine. He was gentle and tentative at first, but I passionately pressed my lips back against his to deepen the kiss. I ran my hands through his gorgeous locks and began to tug. We quickly became a breathless mess and I couldn't help the feeling building in the pit of my stomach. His hands traveled down to my waist and he gingerly pulled me closer. He was both hesitant and passionate, not quite sure if he should act on his instincts. He pulled back for just a second to speak:
"I know you only have a few weeks left with us, but would you like to get coffee sometime?" he asked with those same puppy dog eyes that made me fall for him in the first place.
"Oh Spencie, we're a bit past coffee don't you think?" I said with blushy cheeks. "Let's get dinner sometime, I'm free any night except Tuesday, I have Zumba class with Penelope."
"She really has influenced you a lot hasn't she?" he said, making a mental note of the pink scrunchie in my hair.
"In more ways than one hot stuff."
---------------------------------------------------------
Over the next few weeks, I spent my days phone flirting with Spencer at work and my nights making out with him in my office or eating Chinese take-out in his apartment. No one on the team, not even Penelope, knew about our brewing workplace romance, and we intended to keep it that way until I was hired permanently. However, that didn't stop him from flirting back on our calls. I was on my last week of internship and I was now the only one who Spencer called when he needed information. Spencer and I had agreed to take it slow, but our most recent calls had me desperate to find out what else he was packing besides the gun strapped to his hip. Just then, a call interrupted my wandering thoughts and I immediately picked up knowing it was him.
“Dayton Ohio you're on the air" I answered in my sexiest voice possible.
"I'd like to make a request," Spencer replied.
"You can request anything you want, doctor" I could hear him chuckle behind the phone before telling me what he actually needed.
"I need you to look up a marketing firm by the name of Firsthand Media and see if they have any connections to the colleges of the first set of victims."
"I'm on it, sugar" I answered.
"Oh and one more favor, look up the words beautiful and brilliant and see what you can find."
"Look at that, it's me"
"You're the best (Y/N)"
I could feel Penelope's eyes on me before she turned around and said
"I've never been more proud."
The rest of the day was filled with calls from the other agents to Penelope, mostly Morgan, until that evening when I got one last call from Spencer. He asked me to see if there were any men who had been admitted to the hospital in the last 6 months for brain injuries, but no one came up.
"Couldn't find anything, looks like you're going to have to punish me Spencie," I replied.
"You'll just have to wait til I get back for that"
He hung up, and I couldn't believe what I just heard. Penelope and I were in shock that Spencer Reid could be so dirty. For once, I was the one blushing on the other end.
"(Y/N) I swear to god if you don't let that man make sweet love to you I am personally writing your letter of resignation"
"Penn! We just flirt is all, like you and Morgan, I could never actually be with him"
"So you two haven't been using my sacred office space to make-out between cases?" she asked with raised eyebrows. I stood there, with my mouth open and eyes wide, looking guilty as ever.
"You do know there's a camera in this office right?" I was mortified. Thank God we'd never done anything more than kiss in this office.
"You knew this whole time? Why didn't you say anything?"
"Oh Morgan knows, but everybody else is still in the dark because I didn't want to risk you not getting hired. And I hacked into the security computers and deleted the footage."
"Thank you so much Penn, and I promise I won't have anymore heated makeout sessions in this office, or anywhere in this building for that matter."
"Anything for my little protege. But in all seriousness, you should definitely ride boy-wonder off into the sunset and make it official once you're hired."
"Penelope!" I hit her in the arm, only half jokingly because I knew deep down that that's exactly what I should do.
---------------------------------------------------------
As usual, I waited in my office for Spencer to meet me. But this time, I was determined to go back to his apartment and finish what we started over the phone.
"Hello beautiful" he said as he made his way over to me. He greeted me with a hungry kiss and it took every ounce of strength I had not to pin him down and ride him in this office.
"Spencer listen, we can't makeout in this office anymore. Garcia and Morgan know about us already and she had to delete the footage off of the security cameras."
"Morgan knows? That present he gave me actually makes a lot of sense now."
"Nevermind that," I said before moving closer to whisper in his ear, "what I need now is for you to punish me like you said you would."
I could feel his heart beating out of his chest, his eyes went wide but faintest hint of a smile appeared on his deliciously soft lips.
"well then what are we waiting for" he said as he grabbed my hand and practically pulled me out of the office.
We wasted no time getting back to his apartment. Reid was always such a cautious driver, but this time he was driving like his life depended on it. Once in the building, he wouldn't let go of my hand and we were practically sprinting towards his door. He fumbled with the key for a moment before the door sprang open and I pushed him inside with the force of my lips on his. His hands had become quite comfortable exploring my body, and tonight was no exception. I tugged on his tie without breaking the kiss and he let out a heavy sigh as I led him towards his bedroom. I pushed him once again, this time down onto the bed, and I practically jumped on top of him to straddle his waist. As I let my weight rest on the growing bulge in his pants, he let out the sexiest groan and I could feel the wetness pooling in my panties. I continued to grind on him as we completely devoured each other. This wasn't the first time we'd done this, but this time it was different, we both wanted more.
"Spence please," I whined, "I need you."
"You can have me baby," he replied, looking up at me with those puppy dog eyes that I adore so much.
We quickly undressed and I raced to climb back on top of him.
"You really are beautiful," he said while tucking a loose strand of hair back behind my ear. I smiled back at him and gently kissed his lips before going back to grinding over his now bare cock.
His groans were like music to my ears and I couldn't help but sighing at the feeling of him gliding across my exposed cunt.
"Baby please, I want to be inside you," he pleaded.
"Do you have a, uh, condom?" I asked, somewhat sheepishly.
"I do...that was actually the 'gift' that Morgan got me," he said followed by a nervous chuckle. He reached into the drawer on the bedside table and, slightly trembling, opened the package.
"I-I just want you to know that I haven't done this in a while, (Y/N)," he began, "I don't know if I'll be any good." He was just as nervous as I was. I gave him a sympathetic nod before replying.
"It's okay Spence, it's been a while for me too. I guess you could say we get pretty caught up in our work."
"Agreed," he said, slightly more at ease.
As soon as he finished up rolling on the condom, I wasted no time lining him up with my entrance and sinking onto his length.
"Fuck, baby" he moaned with his eyes screwed shut "you feel so good." It was insanely hot to hear such foul language come out of Spencer Reid's mouth.
"You want me to ride you baby?" I asked teasingly.
"Yes please..."
I began to bounce rapidly on his dick, feeling every inch of him come in and out of me. I had a feeling he wasn't going to last long, but I didn't care, I was beyond happy to just watch the pleasure that I was bringing him. I took his hands and placed them on my breasts, which caused a simultaneous moan to come from the both of us.
"God (Y/N) you're going to make me cum" he said, nearly out of breath.
I knew he was close, but I was slowing down as my legs began to give out on me. He sensed the slowing of my pace, so he took one hand from my breast, wrapped it around my waist, and began to pump into me from below.
“Consider this your punishment babygirl”
This new angle was heaven to me and I couldn't help but cry out. He was fucking me so hard I swear I could see stars.
"Oh god Spence," I moaned. For someone who has been out of the game for a while, he was making me feel so good.
"I'm gonna...I'm..." he muttered.
"Let it out Spence, cum for me baby."
And with that, he spilled his load inside the condom. He just kept coming and coming inside of me until there was nothing left. Spencer Reid was utterly and completely spent.
---------------------------------------------------------
“Well Dr. Reid, you sure know how to please a woman,” you said poking him in the rib.
“What can I say, I’m an overachiever,” he replied with a cocky smile plastered on his face.
As I was about to go in for a kiss on his cheek, my cellphone rang, and it was a call from Penelope.
“Hello my pretty! Sorry in advance that I’m probably interrupting your sexy times with boy-wonder but I just couldn’t wait to tell you. You got the job!”
“Oh my goodness! That’s great news, thanks Penn! What department am I in?”
“You’re going to be working in the international intelligence department, aaaaand that means you’ll probably have to report your little romance directly to human resources.”
“Sounds good Garcia, we’ll take care of that first thing in the morning,” Reid interjected.
“Ah, so boy-wonder is there with you! Looks like you took my advice after all (Y/N),” Penelope replied.
I rolled my eyes and said “Goodnight Penelopeeee” in a sing-songy voice.
“Goodnight you two, be safe and don’t stay up tooooo late.”
“Aww, what ever happened to the fun Penelope Garcia?”
“She’s not here right now but leave a message, bye!” And with that our conversation was over.
“Guess it’s time to tell the rest of the team about us”
“I guess so Spence, good luck handling all the teasing on your own baby,” I said with a giggle and planted a kiss on his cheek before drifting off to sleep. Tomorrow was surely going to be an interesting day at the office.
__________________________________
AN: Thanks for all the love, shameless plug for my newest oneshot The Visit
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