#If people are going to write aroaces in a relationship you can at least learn how they work

[askthebadkidz]

I feel like at a guess, the recent polls are about Riz shipping. Which is an interesting conversation, im ace and on the aro spectrum and I’m So So thankful for this very rare positive rep. What I will also say is that I don’t personally object to riz shipping either, sexuality and romance and forms of relationship are very complex and I think interesting to explore in fiction. Sure some accounts of this are done better and others worse and you should consider ‘am I just ignoring this for easier plot’ but on an individual level I think it’s a matter of quality of writing not morality. Where it for me gets problematic is when Every or most fan content ignores his sexuality, and even then it’s less an indication or an indictment of any one fic and more an issue of culture in the fandom (Id also say the same thing for Kristen too personally)

This is literally the most normal fandom I’ve ever been apart of, every other fandom would have hanged us. I’m so glad we’re all so normal about this. Like genuinely.

I’ve seen a lot of people just straight up ignore Riz’s sexuality or say that a Riz ship is ‘endgame’ in the actual show, which is obviously straight up arophobia if coming from an alloromantic but in all honesty mostly in fan works I’m just mad that none of them know HOW TO WRITE DEMI PROPERLY.

-Mod Riz

[rose-morose]

I've been on a superhero kick since finishing The Boys season 4 finale and I finally got around to watching the Harley Quinn animated series, or at least the 4 seasons that are currently out as of writing

a bit heavy on the meta comedy for my taste, but over all I enjoyed it, and I have some thoughts, so I'm here to bring you the amateur analysis nobody asked for or wanted

(very long Harley Quinn spoilers below cut)

(seriously it's so fucking long don't hit the cut if you don't want a wall of text on your screen)

at its core, Harley Quinn is a show about relationships, and I don't just mean romantic relationships, I mean human, and occasionally non human, relations of all kinds: family, friends, coworkers, lovers, enemies, nemeses, etc. it's an exercise in the concept of the social and how each person interacts with and relates to other individuals and groups

I think it would be fun to take a closer look at some of these relationships and analyse them from the perspective of a confused aroace loser with exactly 6 friends so here we go

the show centers on two individuals who, by the beginning of the show, have quite literally never had anything even remotely resembling a healthy relationship in their entire lives, which is not hyperbole in the slightest, and again is not just referring to romantic relationships, but relationships of all kinds

the focus is on DC's titular Harley Quinn, and her only friend turned best friend turned girlfriend (minor spoiler but not really) Poison Ivy, and the evolution of their relationship, as well as the relationships of many prominent DC characters around them, and also Kite Man

this is going to be quite a long one with many parts, so you'll have to bear with me for awhile or just give up now you have been warned

part one

the (toxic) insane clown posse (duo)

the show opens with the infamously toxic romance between Harley Quinn and the clown prince of crime, the Joker himself

episode one opens with a showcase of the well documented abusive relationship between Quinn and Joker and just how abusive the Joker truly is as he leaves her for dead yet again

Poison Ivy, powerful supervillain and only friend of Harley Quinn, goes to great lengths to help Harley see that her relationship with Joker is not as perfect as she believes

it's clear there is already a lot of love between Ivy and Harley, and despite the fact that Ivy is a well known misanthrope with a burning hatred of humanity, she has made a singular exception for Harley due in part to her tenure at Arkham as a psychiatrist during one of Ivy's stays

Harley spends season one attempting to escape the telltale psychological hold of a manipulative and abusive relationship, which is easier said than done and not simple in the slightest, but by the end of the first season she has made a considerable amount of progress

part two

emancipation, the crew, and new friends

of course breaking off her romantic relationship with the Joker does not free Harley of his hold, the process is far more strenuous and takes considerably more time, but now she has an opportunity to start some new positive relationships in her life to help her through, and that takes the form of her new crew which consists of Dr. Psycho, Clay Face, King Shark, and Sy and she befriends Ivy's plant Frank and the Queen of Fables as well

as I've mentioned Harley has no experience with healthy relationships, and her initial transactional attitude and emotional neglect towards her new friends is quite telling, but she is in the process of learning how to truly connect with people, a challenge her background in psychiatry seems to lend a foundation to help with

each episode of the first season follows her uncovering a new facet of how a genuine friendship is formed and maintained, all the while battling her own selfishness to be the best friend she can be

the friendships seem to fall out of touch over the course of the show, but there remains a rapport between the crew even after their professional split

the later seasons spend a lot less time exploring friendships, a decision I'm not too thrilled with, but the exploration of relationships continues regardless

part 3

Ivy, Kite Man, and the most baffling romance I've ever seen

I genuinely hate this relationship so much that I made an entire other post about it here

it's really god damn long, probably not as long as part 4, but fuck I just want to throttle Kite Man to death with my bare fucking hands

it's less the relationship I hate and more just Kite Man himself, he's not even necessarily a bad character he just fucking sucks and gets away with it every time and it pisses me off

though I do still hate the relationship

part 4

Harley, Ivy, true love, and possibly the best written romance I've seen on television

Harley's season 2 meeting with Mr. Freeze tells us a lot about what she thinks of love

she sees Mr. Freeze's affection towards his cryogenically frozen wife Nora as creepy and exploitative, and when Mr. Freeze gives his life to save his wife, Harley comments that his actions are 'insane'

admittedly Freeze's expressions of affection do seem very creepy, but Harley's subsequent outburst on how love is bullshit indicates that Freeze's behaviour isn't her real issue

Harley seems to believe that true love was a lie that the Joker sold her to keep her under his control, and, having no other experience, assumes that everyone is just like her and the Joker, and are only trying to get what they want from a relationship without consideration for others

but Nora's reciprocation of Mr. Freeze's affection when Harley unfreezes her quickly begins to cast doubt on her previous notion and challenges her perception of love itself

and then she finds her own true love and everything changes

enter the beautiful mess that is Harlivy

"I love you, in a very odd, hard-to-articulate way." - Ivy to Harley in episode 1

it seems clear from a writing standpoint that these two were going to be together romantically from episode 1 and on, the build up to which is noticeable yet sufficiently subtle, and I do think Ivy fell first and by first I mean before the show even begins, and if these two aren't the fucking definition of the fell first/fell harder trope

and Harley falls HARD

early on, her true feelings for Ivy, unexpressed, seem to take up every waking moment of her mind, and she struggles to avoid ruining her relationship with Ivy, while also desperately wanting to take a risk that could ruin it for good, after all, Ivy is marrying and committing to a hetero monogamous relationship with fucking Kite Man for some fucking reason

"You're here, and you're queer. Get used to it!" - Harley to Ivy after Ivy cheated on Kite Man with her

did Ivy already know that she is queer? based on her Catwoman anecdote, yes, and it seems like Harley was also aware of her own queerness, it is odd to see a queer relationship in media where no one involved is overtly struggling with their own sexuality or gender, it's not necessarily a bad thing, nor is it something completely new, it's just unexpected

unfortunately, we do have to talk about the giant kite-shaped elephant in the room, except, just kidding, no we don't, fuck that guy go back to part 3 if you care, his whole relationship was nothing but an obstacle in my opinion, but I should bring up the infidelity

in a monogamous relationship, when one partner engages in sexual or romantic pursuits with a third party without the other partner's consent or knowledge, that is categorised as 'cheating' and is widely seen as a profound breach of trust and a betrayal of the highest order, I think this is because monogamous relationships are built on exclusivity and trusting that your partner will not break their vow of exclusivity that they have sworn to uphold under any circumstances (sometimes there are exceptions I guess whatever)

to my understanding infidelity is often indicative of a want that falls beyond the boundaries of monogamy and is often not communicated properly for lack of courage, lack of will, or simple adversity to change

Ivy's want seems to be Harley, and her challenge seems to be adversity to change and a lack of self confidence/courage

from what I understand, it's the same as someone you thought you could count on more than anyone else in the world breaking an important promise that they made to you with utmost sincerity, and that shit sucks for anyone regardless of sexuality or circumstance

I have already spent way too much time on probably unnecessarily explaining adultery, but I'm aroace so I am just trying to work through it and understand it myself and am not actually certain if my understanding is accurate so please correct me if I'm wrong this is all third hand information

moving right along, we can finally watch the romance begin, enter the eat bang kill tour

Harley and Ivy have, up till this point, still not had a single healthy romantic relationship, and it really shows, but quite crucially they are improving every episode and trying their best to work it out

Harley, having never really experienced real romantic love before, is desperate to feel as loved as possible, and once she has felt it for the first time, she never wants to let go

she prolongs the eat bang kill tour as long as she possibly can, showering Ivy with gifts and doing crazy stuff that only serial killers would find fun, just trying to keep that high of the 'honeymoon phase" alive for as long as she can

Harley does not want to exist without Ivy if it means potentially losing the amazing feelings that she is experiencing for the very first time in her life

on the other hand, Ivy is very reserved and submissive, she has trouble voicing her true feelings to Harley and suffers for it, a similar pattern of behaviour that she exhibited with Kite Man

Ivy just can't say no, she also does not want to lose that high, but has a different approach to maintaining it

"A big part of being in a relationship is not always telling the exact truth. And that way, you can get what you need without hurting anyone's feelings." - Poison Ivy

this line is incredibly telling of Ivy's past relationships, and it will become a challenge that she must overcome if she wants any hope of actually forming a healthy relationship

and hey, maybe a little lie here and there isn't so bad for a relationship, that's not for me to say and I honestly don't know, but Ivy seems to use the technique excessively to her own detriment

but I mean, what would a compelling dramatic romance be without serious communication issues?

and all these little minor contentions and miscommunications finally build up to the first major conflict in Harley and Ivy's relationship, Edin

it turns out Harley and Ivy might not be on the same page about the whole extermination of humanity, and their failure to communicate that ends in horror as, despite Ivy's wishes, Harley makes a sacrifice that forces Ivy to choose between Harley's life and her own dream

Ivy chooses Harley of course, but this moment rattles their relationship dynamic dramatically and Harley panics, deciding that she wasn't being very supportive of Ivy, and still being desperate not to lose her newfound happiness, she lapses back into her behaviour from when she was with Joker, Harley goes right back to doing exactly what she's told without question and with great enthusiasm in spite of her own personal opinion, because that's how she has handled conflict historically, that's what has worked and she will do anything to hold on to that feeling she has had being with Poison Ivy

Ivy mistakes Harley's new found enthusiasm as genuine, and it takes the Joker himself to point out that she is doing exactly what he did to Harley so long ago, so Ivy asks Harley what she really wants

and now comes my favourite part, the very problematic Valentine's Day special

in spite of the many problematic events of the episode, there will never be a sweeter moment than Ivy sharing her favourite Valentine's Day with Harley, it just melts my heart every time I watch it

as for the problematic part there's nothing new, it's some standard self aware hijinks that affirms that the writers are aware of the unhealthy behaviours exhibited by the two leads and exploring that dynamic is all part of the story, mostly centering on Harley's fixation on being the best partner possible mixed with lasting psychological damage, all from her time with the Joker, but the resolution is adorable

I can't really describe Ivy's favourite Valentine's Day, you just have to watch it, it honestly is the most wholesome and genuine moment in the show, and I can hardly think of any other moment in any other show that can top it either

entering season 4, Harley and Ivy's latest challenge is to set up professional boundaries and segregate their own personal lives from their work lives seeing as they are now each working on opposing sides of a conflict

it's a struggle to be sure, and each partner is terrified that without their shared proclivity for villainy, a rift may form in their relationship

the fear is certainly justified, but despite the challenges presented by their professional split they manage to find other ways to connect

that's pretty much all I have to say on them so far, I think their romance is by far the best part of the show, and I personally believe it to be incredibly well written in spite of what others may think, but it's time to move on

"I mean man. You know me better than anyone." - Ivy

"You're easy to celebrate." - Harley

"And you're fun to celebrate with." - Ivy

part 5

found family vs blood relatives

"You people are not my family, and you know what? You're not even worth it." - Harley to her parents after they tried to murder her

there's no doubt that Harley's family fucking sucks, and you'll be hard pressed to find a family that doesn't anywhere in this show

Ivy's parents were abusive, Harley's were manipulative, Kite Man's are assholes, Batman's are dead, as are Nightwing's, Dr. Psycho is intentionally a terrible father and unintentionally a terrible husband, Sy locked his sister in a basement, Barbara's father is an alcoholic deadbeat and her mother left, King Shark hates his asshole father and killed multiple of his brothers, Robin's father is an emotionally repressed billionaire playboy and his mother is a sociopathic assassin that wants nothing to do with him, the list goes on

every blood family has fallen apart and some of the members have scattered to various found families

the show initially centres on one found family in particular, Harley's crew, but later shifts much of the focus on the bat family as well

both of these families are as dysfunctional as the next, but there is a sense of love and belonging that they bring to each member that families are known to have

what really makes a family? it's hard to say, I think it's like a sort of community that always has your back, even when you're wrong, and maybe you don't like each other all the time, but there is still a sort of love between everyone

families spend time together, but if they live together they're always trying to get away from each other, they support each other, but they will rescind their support if they think you're doing dumb shit that they don't like, they love each other, but may not often express it, sometimes they get along, and sometimes they don't, there is a certain dichotomy to a familial relationship that doesn't really exist in most other relationships

where as you might need to like your friends in order to stay friends, families can maintain a bond in spite of quarrels and disagreements, not everyone will like it, but it's what you've got

in this sense, families are the only relationship that you can never really seem to escape, Dick came back to Gotham, Robin left with his mother, Ivy tore the city apart to rescue Frank, Harley always rescues her crew, and they always rescue her

but the familial aspect does not define a relationship, other relationships will exist between family members that are not inherently related, you can be friends with your family, mere acquaintances, even enemies, or something else entirely

Batgirl and Harley are both new to the bat family, but despite their short tenure, both are given a sense of family from people they know very little about

in my experience, found family often comes from where you least expect it, Batgirl was probably the only person not absolutely shocked to their core to see Harley Quinn herself joining the bat family, and Sy was just Harley and Ivy's landlord before he sacrificed his physical body for them, Frank is a fucking plant, who would expect that their best friend would be a sentient fucking plant?

at some point Nightwing seems to heavily backtrack out of nowhere and stops treating Harley as part of the family, this, to me, seems to be just a poor writing choice seeing as Nightwing was previously very enthusiastic to have Harley in the family

while his concerns may be justified, it's weird that they are only just now being expressed

part 6

Nora Freeze, Batman, Bane, Jim Gordon, Batgirl, Alfred, Poison Ivy, and loneliness

Catwoman is the only lonely character that can tolerate being alone, she even prefers it

whereas Nora, Batman, Bane, Jim, Barbara, Ivy, and Alfred on the other hand each contend with their own particular brand of loneliness and each cope with it in their own unhealthy ways

Nora is grieving, Batman is reluctant, Bane is desperate, Jim is self sabotaging, Barbara is insecure, Ivy is traumatised, and Alfred is purposeless

but for this part I want to focus on Nora

in light of her supposed incurable disease, subsequent coma, and the loss of her husband, Nora has never been more alone

she has no one to turn to, and no one to support her as she grieves for all that she has lost, and I don't mean to imply that Nora's husband was what gave her life value or meaning, in reality it's only a small part of the life she left behind

Nora expressed that her fundamental life changes have left her alienated from all of her previous relationships, her friends and family all expect her to be someone that she no longer is

Nora seems to turn to drugs and alcohol for relief, she seems lost and doesn't know what to do, she just kind of eventually stumbles into her new job working for Ivy, and doesn't take it very seriously

she is understandably put off of serious relationships, and seems to just engage in sex for fun, which is not actually a problem though some characters may disagree

the people of this world have never been lonelier than they are now, and Nora is hardly alone in her isolation

Batgirl's earnest demeanor and nerdy vibe make it difficult for her to make friends, and her deadbeat parents don't pay any attention to her, though things seem to be even worse on the occasion that they do

Jim is married to the job as they say, though this is largely comedic he shows no signs of improvement

Bane is just not very bright and no one takes him seriously, though he does find someone in the end

Ivy hates humanity, but she still seeks companionship from those few she deems worthy, the only trouble is how few she deems worthy, and it's difficult to say whether this is her fault, or theirs, but she does find people she can connect with, and is definitely happier for it

why she deems Kite Man worthy will forever be a mystery to me

part 7

the Joker takes a stab at healthy relationships

after season 1 the Joker is presumed dead, but Harley and Ivy soon discover that he survived, as a basic bitch white suburban amnesiac with no memory of his true identity

his confusion provides the catalyst through which the Joker begins a romantic relationship with the totally unsuspecting Bethany, and by extension he becomes the step father to her two children

the relationship continues for a short number of months until Harley, in a desperate bid to save the city, violently reminds Joker of his true identity

this time around Joker remembers his own life as well as the life he had lived as an amnesiac and is immediately disgusted with himself

he breaks off his relationship with Bethany because she challenges his perception of his own identity and that scares him

however, upon realising how much happier he was as an amnesiac living with Bethany and her children, he decides that maybe he can give the whole true love thing a shot, after all, lots of dads are serial killers

and thus the true romance of Bethany and the Joker finally begins, it's honestly kind of surprising that Bethany still wanted to date the Joker and not the other way around, but I suppose it's understandable if you've already spent so much time together, plus Bethany and her kids were excessively eager when Joker announced to them his return to crime so maybe they were kind of into it the whole time

part 8

Jim Gordon and his (seemingly) one sided friendship with the Batman

Batman is self admittedly "not good with feelings" and by extension, personal relationships

he is incredibly insistent that he "work[s] alone"

he is dismissive of Jim's constant insistence that they are friends and not just coworkers, but in spite of this attitude Harley is able to convince Batman that Jim Gordon is not just a coworker, but might just be his one and only friend

the idea that they are friends is further compounded by the comedically timed screen saver of Batman's computer that shows him and Gordon together celebrating

after Harley's intervention their friendship remains very one sided with Gordon constantly seeking Batman's validation and approval, but Batman at the very least has acknowledged the truth of their relationship

part 9

can people change

can Harley become someone reliable and dependable?

can Ivy count on and trust someone other than herself?

can the Joker become a suburban dad?

can Psycho stop calling women cunts?

can Kite Man do anything right ever?

can people change?

according to the show, the answer is yes

Nora Freeze spent years in a cryogenic coma, and upon her revival, lost the love of her life

her friends all expected her to be the way they remembered, but the experience had a deep impact that spurred a fundamental change within her

she didn't just lose her husband by waking from the coma, she lost her entire life as well, she feels like an entirely new person, and it leaves her lost and lonely, but it wasn't her husband's death that left her all alone

Harley and Ivy are both forced to undergo changes in order to make their relationship work, but they don't just change for the sake of each other, they change for their own sake as well

these changes are what allow them to form all kinds of new positive relationships, but failure to change promises severe social consequences

Jim Gordon's failure to change guarantees the continuation of his misery, he could have had a loving family and admits that he loved being a father, but he ultimately decides that change is scarier than loneliness

part 10

Ivy and Swamp Thing, the end of friendship

"You never let me express myself, Ivy! This is why we stopped being friends." - Swamp Thing in a fit of rage

many of us have had that one friend that would whinge for hours on end about their problems, but would suddenly have something better to do when it was our turn to complain, unfortunately some of us have even been that friend

it can be incredibly frustrating for the listener, and the whinger often doesn't even realise that they're doing it

Ivy was that friend to Swamp Thing, and until now she never even knew the true reason they stopped being friends in the first place

it's tough to know when to give people a chance, and when to cut a toxic friend out of your life for good, Swamp Thing had to make that call for his own sake, and it seems to have paid off

their hiatus apart allowed Ivy the time she needed to grow, so that she could be a good friend for a change

it's also an example of the idea that the end of a relationship doesn't always have to be for good, people and circumstances change, and sometimes reconnecting can lead to a better relationship than you ever had before

so it's finally done, I have been writing this post for fucking ages now even though no one will ever read it, but at this point it's mostly for me anyway so no harm done, this blog is basically my diary as it is

I didn't even talk about everything I wanted to but it has been months so I'm finally just going to post it

[alexandraisyes]

eclipse is not straight, at least imo. He's either really gay for Sun, or aroace (or something else idk)

Also same goes for Solar- either aroace or really queer. Not straight.

My gaydar is going insane for them

It is my personal belief/headcanon that Eclipse is aroace. We never get confirmation, but he's really touch-averse in general, and he has ASPD. I can literally confirm as someone with ASPD who has done their research that if you have full-blown diagnosable ASPD you fall under the aromantic umbrella. Most of us are demiromantic or romance-repulsed (more the former than the latter). There's an actual psychological reason behind this as well.

(Rifling through my notes hold on)

For someone with ASPD who has learned to care and respect their partner, love may still be experienced differently compared to individuals without the disorder. Their expression of love might be more pragmatic or rational, characterized by a deep sense of loyalty and commitment rather than intense emotional connection. They may prioritize actions over words, demonstrating their love through practical gestures and efforts to ensure the well-being and happiness of their partner. Their love may be marked by a strong sense of protection and responsibility towards their partner, as they recognize the importance of the relationship in their life. They might strive to understand their partner's needs and preferences, even if they don't inherently grasp them on an emotional level. Despite potential challenges in empathizing with their partner's emotions, they may still demonstrate care and consideration in their own way, seeking to maintain harmony and stability in the relationship. Over time, with effort and self-awareness, they can develop a deeper understanding of love and cultivate healthier relationship dynamics.

Earlier set of notes I had stashed away. Looking for the psychology set now.

The aromantic umbrella encompasses a wide range of experiences related to romantic attraction, including people who experience little to no romantic attraction (aromantic), those who experience it rarely (greyromantic), or under specific circumstances (demiromantic). Given this diversity, many people with ASPD who struggle with emotional connections find that their experiences align with some aspect of the aromantic spectrum. The difficulty in forming deep emotional connections, which is common in ASPD, can directly influence one’s experience of romantic attraction. If emotional connection is a significant part of romantic attraction for most people, then those with ASPD might not experience romantic attraction in the same way or at all, leading them to identify as aromantic. For people with ASPD, identifying as aromantic can be a way to understand and communicate their experiences with attraction and relationships. It provides a framework that validates their experience of not feeling romantic attraction or feeling it differently.

Literally speaking as someone with ASPD who knows several other people with ASPD, everyone I have talked to experiences an extremely reduced or no romantic attraction. Most of us don't even know that we can feel romantic attraction until we form a deep emotional bond with another person, and if you've been following my writings about ASPD, you'll know exactly how difficult that is for us. Aromantic doesn't mean you don't have an interest in dating, it literally is just a reflection of how much romantic attraction you can feel.

Aromanticism refers to a romantic orientation where an individual does not experience romantic attraction towards others. This doesn't necessarily mean they are uninterested in relationships or incapable of love; rather, their relationships may not involve the romantic elements traditionally expected in society.

I cannot tell you a single relationship with someone with ASPD that is "traditionally romantic" because we literally just do not love like empathetic people. We don't "fall in love", instead it's a deep sense of loyalty and devotion for someone who has earned our respect, and if romantic love comes on later in life if that person sticks around, then good for us. But it's not considered a natural thing for us because most of the time people aren't willing to stick around that long, or we get freaked out and dip before we can form any real connection to others.

As far as Solar, I don't really know what he is nor do I have a speculation. He might be aroace; he's never really expressed an interest in dating or things like that. I think it's a fun headcanon that he's demiromantic like a lot of my friends have suggested for him.

Weekend Ask Game - Send Me TSBS Confessions

[novainthevoid]

for YOU, I choose the star sanses :3c (yes all 3, you can also just choose one of them if you want lol)

Ink

First impression: Honestly it's been so long since my first introduction to him that I'm not even sure how I felt back then. Given I dressed up as him for Halloween the year he was created, I'd say it was pretty good.

Impression now: Still good, surprise surprise. He is my biggest blorbo ever. Love the little guy.

Favorite moment: Kinda hard to say given the nature of his story being unfinished and largely inside asks buuuut. I'd say either him playing with/creating Buggy or him being a nuisance (affection) towards his dads.

Idea for a story: Magical Girl Ink, Eldritch Horror Ink, exploration of the development of the Star Sanses as a group with Ink still being his chaotic neutral self (I like going the route of them being friends first, coworkers later).

Unpopular opinion: This is a hard one... I'd say, though its less of an unpopular opinion and more of a reminder to people, Ink is capable of change. The nature of his story being mostly unfinished means that his character is in a state of perma-stagnation in canon, but he has the capacity to grow as a person still. This can mean a lot of different things, both good and bad growth, but it is certainly possible.

Favorite relationship: Star Sanses (shocking I know) as well as his relationship with him and his dads! Ooh and his relationship with any potential kids... honestly I love all explorations of relationships involving Ink.

Favorite headcanon: There's the classic (AuDHD), but some slightly more obscure ones include: he's aroace (canon, obvi) but romance favorable. I think he's highly motivated by curiosity and would be fascinated by relationships and willing to try one (if that person's script/story is finished ofc)

Dream

First Impression: Another one that I don't remember learning about for the first time, but I know I've had an interest in him for a long time. He has so much potential as a character! I was always a bit averse to his canon though tbh.

Impression now: I love him. He is everything to me. Again, so much potential as a character. Ironically, despite Ink being my all time favorite, I have written way more stories from Dream's perspective than Ink's. He's just easier to write as a perspective djdjdj.

Favorite moment: This is an even harder one than Ink because while he does have more canon moments, I do not like his canon lol. No hate to anyone who does, it's just not for me. A favorite moment for me to write/think about for him relates to his first time making connections after the Apple Incident, whoever that may be.

Idea for a story: Dream being on the run from Nightmare (ie the first few years post the Apple Incident) and the eventual change from just trying to survive to fighting back.

Unpopular opinion: He can be both badass and tired and so incredibly kind. I like versions of him that are a little more reserved, a little more angry, a little less nice, but I fully believe that he is kind. It's not a Dream to me if he isn't kind.

Favorite relationship: Nightmare and Dream but specifically an exploration of their relationship pre-Apple Incident or in an alternate universe where the Apple Incident doesn't happen. The breakdown and/or mending of their relationship is just so good. Also, of course, the Star Sanses. They're friends to ME. They make each other better.

Favorite headcanon: Kinda shown in unpopular opinion but my favorite headcanon is that he has learned a lot of street-smarts from living on the run from Nightmare for a long time. Also, I headcanon that the Apple Incident happened a lot later than in canon, at least closer to like age 16 or so. I just cannot deal with it happening when Dream and Nightmare were six.

Blue

First impression: "Ooh a Papyrus!Sans, cool. But he's even more hyperactive than Papyrus? Reminds me of [best friend who dressed up as Blue to match with me dressing up as Ink]."

Impression now: HE IS THE MOMENT. Not a shocker given I love Papyrus but I love Blue. I think he has some fascinating interpretations and that he can be done in so many ways to distinguish him from Papyrus.

Favorite moment: Hmm. Completion of the trio of Difficult To Pick a Canon Moment. This time because it is so so hard to find any canon information on Underswap. I love the way he is portrayed in Ask-Error, so I'll pick that!

Idea for a story: How Blue Joined The Star Sanses (my personal idea currently is that he ended up in the OT somehow and met them at a council meeting). Furthermore, any explorations of Blue that help differentiate him from Papyrus.

Unpopular opinion: Less unpopular nowadays but I was around for early fandom so the frustration I feel towards this idea persists: just because he is incredibly nice, kind, energetic, and optimistic does not mean he is stupid. Also, more relevant to modern times but I cannot see him leaving the Stars to join Nightmare's Gang, no matter how badly he is treated. I can see him wanting to help them, but not join. Like Dream, this is just my personal opinion on it though! No hate to anyone who likes those stories. Keep reading and writing y'all!

Favorite relationship: Him and Stretch when its not just about Stretch being overprotective. I don't mind Stretch being overprotective, I just need him to have more characterization than that please. Also, of course, the Star Sanses.

Favorite headcanon: He's the voice of reason in the Star Sanses. Anywhere else and he would likely be the menace of the group but when its two immortals with abysmal levels of socialization, especially with mortals, even someone capable of the Skeleton Brothers levels of chaos can become the voice of reason. He still loves his friends dearly though, and participates/incites problems on occasion.

[byoldervine]

If you're aroace, do you still write romance? If so, do you do it differently than allos do?

Tbh it’s made me very cautious of writing men and women because no matter what straight allos seem to think they’re flirting and would make a super cute couple. Back in my fic days that was often how I decided to have my characters date; I’d get loads of comments saying they couldn’t wait to see how X ship pans out when in reality it was just two friends having banter. And romance always seemed to be like a requirement in every story; if you don’t include at least a subplot where the main characters get together, what’s the point in creating them? Even if that mindset isn’t true

But just to show how my sexuality did indeed influence my writing - as well as my writing actually influencing my sexuality - I’ll give you guys an example:

I’ve mentioned it before but there was one character called Indigo who I wrote in an atrociously-written HTTYD fic on Wattpad back when I was like thirteen - all the comments were saying she was totally in love with another character, Plasma, and how they couldn’t wait to see her accept these feelings she has for him

Reminder; I had no intention of having them be in a relationship

But I decided to lean into it and explore why people perceived it this way, then used another character to be raising all the points. I did admit that, looking back as an older and more experienced writer, I did once or twice say things that implied more than intended because I didn’t fully understand the innuendo of them back then, but there was even some newer stuff that I just couldn’t figure out

So I tested my theories; I had the characters banter more, being very careful in that first chapter to keep it purely platonic, and people were going crazy about the flirting. So I figured if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em; I leaned into it, explored the idea of Indigo having feelings for Plasma. Let her get conflicted on it, let her vent that she had no idea what this kind of love feels like, just generally used it as an excuse to vent my own feelings on romantic love in general. I identified as bisexual at the time, but was starting to question things, so I just poured it out onto Indigo because it did work for her character and her general attitude to relationships of any form

Half the comments were about how they were worried about the ship and how Indigo had to realise her feelings soon - but the other half was people predicting that Indigo was aroace. I challenged my readers more directly to guess Indigo’s sexuality and asexual or aroace was the biggest guess. And so I leaned into it again and brought Indigo into what’s all but labelled as a QPR with Plasma, just to see how it goes, and in the meantime I was looking into asexuality. I think you can figure out how the latter went

But I guess what I learned from all of this when it comes to writing romance is that, at least for myself, it’s surprisingly easy to get people shipping them; have a guy and a girl banter. I’ll have to test in future if this works for visibly queer couples, but in general my go-to for flirting is just casual banter and so far it’s done the trick with my other old fics. I’m not flirting, I’m just sarcastic and British

What really scares me is writing sibling dynamics and other familial relationships because if I can make things flirty without even trying then how will this be perceived?

[cartoonrival]

3 15 16 22 smirks

3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

ok if im being honest im STILL thinking about ytp/exploding hotdogs inthe micrwave-amy. NO SHE WOULD FUCKING NOTTTTT you guys just think that any girl liking traditionally feminine things automatically = no personality so the only way you can wrap your head around "fixing her" is making her less "girly". im still going to war over what ppl are doing to amy. literally no one on the planet understands amy like i do and shes not even one of my faves. i dont even enjoy understanding her like she's my own daughter i do it like its an obligation like im legally required. i also recently learned that "does naruto having blonde hair and blue eyes mean he's white-coded" is legitimate discourse and i fr think you all need serious help

15. that one thing you see in fanart all the time

ok this is my biggest hater opinion and i KNOWWWW its like unnecessarily pissy so i havent said antyhing abt it until now but i think you might understand me. I DONT LIKE IT WHEN PEOPLE GIVE SHADOW SOME LITTLE THING TO TAKE CARE OF. I DONT LIKE HIS CHAO AND I DONT LIKE [expunged for my and others' safety] AND I DONT LIKE WHEN PEOPLE JUST GIVE HIM CATS. HE CANT TAKE CARE OF LITTLE CREATURES HE DOESNT CARE TO DO THAT HE DOESNT WANT TO HE JUST DOES NOT HAVE THE CARETAKERS SOUL LIKE HES NOT DOING THAT. HES NOT DOING THAT. BUT PPL DRAW IT ALLLLL THE TIMEE.......... IS THERE NO OTHER WAY WE CAN SHOW HIS SOFT SIDE THEN GIVING HIM SOME LITTLE CREATURE. HES NOT DOING THAT SHIT!!!!!!!!!! its so stupid bc its not even like ooc NECESSARILY i mean his chao exists in at least some canons and theres nothing really saying it COULDNT happen and its such a harmless thing to be a hater about BUT I HATE ITTTTTT also when ppl make the hedgehogs wag their tails BE SO SERIOUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

literally every ship with amy. i think you guys just are desperate to ship her w someone. AROACE AMY SWEEP. ASK ME ABOUT MY AROACE AMY AGENDA!!! also i know youve talked about this 1 million times but i cannot fucking stand how the greater fandom talks about scourge bc none of them even KNOW HIM AT ALL and miss literally EVERYTHING that makes his character interesting and fun bc you didnt even READ ARCHIE you just decided to take this one dude out and sand him of everything of note so you can make him a sad little meow meow ToT SONIC HAS PLENTY OF SAD LITTLE MEOW MEOWS CANT A GUY JTSU SUCK??? CANT HE JUST BE A TERRIBLE LOSER? COME ONNNNNNN but ofc you wouldnt understand bc you didnt even READ ARCHIEEEEEE.

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

JULIE SU. JULIE SU. JULIE SU ALWAYS. theres literally so much that could be said and expanded upon w her family and background and not even in the way that canon didnt give her anything at all and you gotta diy everything, shes SUCH A FUN CHARACTER shes so funny and such a jerk and everyone writes her off as "girl knuckles" so fast that they wont even LOOK at how much unique personality she has and how UNIQUE her relationship w knuckles is LIKE.... ken penders actually gave js a fun and unique and dope personality, the FANS are the ones writing her off as girl knuckles. ummmmm its not looking good for you people! and theres the assumption ig that all the romances in archie just suck bc theres sort of a lot of them, obviously i dont like every one COUGHken and sallyCOUGH but like ToT KNUXSU IS SO SO SO GOOD.... THE WAY THEY TALK TO EACH OTHER IS SO GOOD like you guys wipe every characters personality to put them in a ship, then talk about knuxsu as if thats the issue with it and why you dont like it, but. ITS NOT EVEN LIKE THAT. AND IF IT WAS SHOULDNT YOU LIKE THAT SORT OF SLOPim sounding like lorillee rn. QPR KNUXSU AGENDA WILL NEVER DIE

and in the same vein as js, lien da also. ppl just in passing say that either shes hot or shes ugly and no one talks about that creepy as fuck issue where eggman surgically put her back together. that issue was so fucking dope. shes so awesome. i love you lien da you are terrible and i love you.

obviously literally just all of archie. nobody talks about archie. i fucking love archie but everyones too scared. i wish i could make that au

[sobeksewerrat]

✨and🏳️‍🌈 with Hazbin for the ask game

(Also do I have permission to rant about Alastor to you. I hate that fucker so much.)

(yes you do. Please do it actually)

Note: added the cut cos I ended up yapping

✨what draws you towards your hyperfixation? what is interesting about it?

Tough one. Honestly part of it is that I cannot control my AuDHD and part of it is that it has a lot of potential and possible ideas?? I find myself to be more attached to media I can play around with, only God knows how many TMF fanfics, wips and AUs I used to have, and Hazbin is perfect for that.

Besides, I would consider myself to be religious and I'm quite interested in stories based on mythology and religion, and the core concept of Hazbin intrigued me as a Muslim (funfact! In Islam hell is temporary for most people iirc LMFAO). Also, what better way to explore my religious trauma?!

And it's chock-full of potentially interesting characters and dynamics that go unexplored, so that ties back into the first point.

And last but not least, I tend to be a fan of objectively bad and/or very controversial stuff (*coughs* danganronpa, mlb, Jeff the killer-)

I could yap forever about my love-hate relationship with Hazbin but I think I should stop here for now.

🏳️‍🌈do you have any headcanons (lgbt, race, neuro, etc) that are important to you?

YES!! TOO MANY ACTUALLY!!! Here are some of my faves :3

Adam is SWANA, mostly projecting but all abrahamic religions originated from the SWANA region soooo (obviously the term SWANA and the region prolly didn't exist when Adam was first created but shush) And my Eve is black BTW!

Transmasc Adam!! This headcannon is so, so important to me. So important I created multiple AUs with lore documents about it. I could write an essay about why I headcannon him as that. Multiple, actually.

Albino Lute!! I hc they're SWANA too (and Heavenborn, don't ask how, idk either) , but they have albinism (her natural eye colour is very light blue, they wear gold contacts).

NONBINARY LUTE WITH SHE/THEY PRONOUNS ‼‼‼

the exorcists, mainly Lute n Vaggie, as Adam's daughters (biologically or otherwise)!! I can't live without that headcannon and I'm so fucking upset there's not enough content about it out there

Autistic Lute and Cain (my oc at least). They inherited it from Adam. And Eve has anxiety, we've established that. She also has OCD. Trust me. And ADHD Abel. And Vaggie with PTSD (they all have it but her especially

AroAce Charlie and Angel Dust!! Ik they're bi and gay respectively, but who says they can't be both?

AroAce Lesbian Lute too.

Asexual Adam!! I already wrote an essay as to why I hc that but since then the hc expanded and I can write a better, updated one. Won't be as lengthy as my hypothetical trans Adam one, but still full of yapping. 

Adam wears his mask not out of insecurity (for the most part) or protection (that thing is LED, it ain't protective) but because he was recognised by one of his children during the first Extermination (even though he had already transitioned by then). Let's just say that didn't turn out well, and Adam was unresponsive for days. 

Adam is genuinely afraid of most things, even silly stuff to us like the dark. Because even though us modern people have the privilege of artificial lights, not living in the wild, medicine, etc.- he didn't. He was literally a caveman. A fever could kill anyone in his family. The night meant being at risk of being eaten. Water can and will kill you because of the bazillion bacteria inside. Winter meant death if you didn't have a fire going 24/7 or covered yourself up with anything. But, he hides his fears because he thinks they're fucking embarrassing (even though it's very clearly untreated trauma)

Adam loves his kids, truly. He fucked up A LOT (killed thousands of them and the whole Vaggie situation), but that doesn't mean he hates them.he just learned not to get attached to them. 

ADAM ‼ HAS ‼ ABANDONMENT ‼ ISSUES‼

Adam lowkey feels he doesn't deserve his spot in Heaven.

I literally came up with this like an hour or two ago with @an-theduckin but Adam actually did believe in redemption once and tried to advocate for it. Till he didn't. Wonder why that is 👀 (got a fic idea I won't finish. Dw abt it)

Adam gaining weight as a form of healing‼ I imagine he was deathly skinny on Earth due to food insecurity, and even though he improved after they invented agriculture and got better at hunting, he was still clearly unhealthy (and popping out the entire human population at the time didn't help). And also he just likes his appearance this way (fuck you Lucifer and your stupid fat joke)

ADAM LOVED HIS WIFE!!! SHE LOVED HIM TOO!!! OH MY GOD GUYS PLEASE GET IT RIGHT.

In a perfect world, Adam would've been Charlie's uncle/father figure. 

Lute and Vaggie cared about each other, things just kind of…well, yk how it ended. Lute has immense amounts of guilt over the whole situation, but they'll never admit it. Especially not after Vaggie started being involved the Lucifer's fucking daughter. 

Adam's secretly a feminist. I'm not even gonna elaborate, figure out my reasoning yourself. 

Vaggie grieved Adam and her fallen sisters after they died in the finale. Of course, she'll never admit it. (I HAVE A FIC WIP ABOUT THIS I HOPE TO FINISH SOMEDAY!!)

Gamer and Fandom kid Lute. This hc means so so much to me! I originally stole it from @bluexjayy ! They're really into cringey fandoms too (mainly danganronpa, FNAF, undertale and the creepypasta fandom- probably mlp too). Secretly writes fanfiction.

I have SO MANY hcs for Stan and I's Cain, Abel and Eve but I doubt anybody wants to hear them sooo

Redhead Lilith. It was ginger in Eden, turned blood red when she became a sinner. She dyes it blonde.

Annnddddd I think I should stop now oh my god I'm so sorry for yapping again Thanks for the ask though!! Please feel free to rant about Alastor.

[as8bakwthesage]

I think the biggest issue with fandom is probably the lack of moderation.

And I don’t say this meaning “fandom should be moderated,” no. I mean, people in fandoms tend to do things in excess or can be very overindulgent with certain things. Fandom lacks personal or individual restraint.

Yes, it’s good to read fiction that will challenge you and will make you uncomfortable, but it’s also important to approach those subjects carefully and when reading or engaging with this material it’s important to step away and engage in other content. (This is about the on-going discourse regarding whether it’s okay to write about difficult topics. The answer is “yes*” *but please also do research, if you are a survivor learn about other people’s experiences. Fuck, if you ain’t a survivor, do this regardless.)

Yes, it’s healthy to self ship and there are psychological benefits to it, but it’s also important to also have real and healthy relationships with people. Platonic or romantic. It’s also important to recognise when something is too far. (This is about how people tend to take their obsessions with characters too far, and don’t engage with actual real people in their day to day lives.)

Yes, it’s healthy to have coping mechanisms, but don’t glorify or make light of serious issues such as rape or incest or abuse. Organisations have written guides on how to write topics such as suicide or rape and how to best approach these kinds of topics in fiction. Use them please. (This is about “proshippers.”**)

Yes, art should be free of censorship, but please let’s respect the wishes of the creator when it comes to the character’s sexualities, romantic preferences. And yes, it’s healthy to draw vent art or write vent fiction but please don’t post your incest/rape/abuse fics about your personal trauma online where people can see it and be cunts about it. (This is about how people frequently disregard aroace characters’ sexualities in order to ship them with other characters. This is also about “proshippers.”)

Yes, it’s good to have debate and talk with your fellow humans, and you shouldn’t be afraid to speak to other people. But it’s also important to know that your experiences may not be universal and bigotry is a very real thing. (This is specifically about fandom racism and how people treat people of colour in fandom because holy shit, white people, listen. Stfu and listen.)

Yes, it’s okay to have something as a means of escapism. But not to the detriment of other people. (This is about Palestine, and Sudan, and Congo.)

People have gotten waaaay too comfortable sharing very intimate and personal details about themselves online. Publicly too. Stuff that maybe you should reconsider before sharing with others, such as your mental disorders/traumas/real names/etc. And obviously, I can’t talk about every single aspect of fandom and the nuances behind a lot of stuff, but hopefully my point is at least somewhat clear. Approach anything you do online with restraint.

I think the best piece of advice I’d give to folks would be this: Please always think about the work you engage with, think about other people when posting and how they will feel, and that just because this is the internet, it doesn’t mean that you are anonymous. Have empathy. Approach conversations in good faith. Ask for clarification if something isn’t clear. Go outside. Seriously, go outside. Open a window in your room. Do other things too. Read fiction or non-fiction stories, depending on which is more out of your wheelhouse. Please go actually read the books you claim to be experts on. Go out of your way to follow more POC who are in your fandoms. Don’t ignore the real world.

**I put “proshipper” in quotation marks because I’m doing that annoying thing where people put quotation marks over terms they think are weird or when they are being sarcastic. In this case, I think proshipper as a term has been very much muddled in so much fandom discourse that it’s very hard to talk about proshippers without someone not understanding what the fuck the other person is talking about. In this case, proshipper means someone who is comfortable shipping characters regardless of the level of abuse prevalent in the relationship, and even romanticise it to some extent, portraying these relationships as desirable.

[marshmallowprotection]

Aaaa, Kait, how have you been?

I'm still trying to get back to Tumblr! A lot has happened with my life and some.. hmm.. experiences, I should say.

But at least I'm focusing a lot on myself or trying to these days sksks, life has been up and down constantly!

This Tuesday I'm starting appointments with my school's psychologist and very possibly going manga shopping with my irl friend after school! I'm aiming for the first volume of Blue Period!

I have also made some progress with my Japanese learning, it's slow but hey! Still progress!

And I actually had gotten into a relationship very recently too but it didn't last for long due to a lot of reasons I'm still processing on. But I discovered I'm aroace and I'm happy to say that I can't wait to think of scenarios with my f/os and focus on myself!

I hope life has been treating you well, Kait! I see that you are still writing and it always brings a smile on my face!

Take care and thank you for everything you have done for us! <3

Congratulations on self-discovery, and I hope this revelation brings you peace of mind as you continue to learn more about yourself and what makes you happy. 

Learning more about yourself is how you understand how to not only take care of yourself but to understand what kind of life you want to lead. What makes you happy and strive toward the future you want is what counts, but remember to live in the moment, too. Taking time to process your feelings and how to communicate those with yourself is something we can all work on as people. So, I'm happy to hear you've found a label that feels right. God knows it took me forever to find the words to describe myself.

So, I know how liberating that must feel. Processing my demisexuality was a long time coming but after I had the words to describe how I felt, it all clicked, and I felt more comfortable in my own skin.

Keep hard at work on your studies, because you will thank yourself later on once you can watch shows without subtitles. It always is impressive when another person decides to learn another language, so I give all the power to you in that journey. 

As far as what I have been up to, I don't think there's anything of interest that is wildly exciting to share. I've spent the latter half of 2023 with exhaustion and a mild string of the flu. I'm still a little bit worn out but hopefully that'll wear off sooner or later so I can get on with writing as much as I want to again!

[runawaymun]

since you already did Elrond, how about Maglor for the character asks? <3

1: sexuality headcanon

Aroace. Can't explain why I get this vibe, but that's the vibe I get!

2: otp

Maglor & his harp. See above.

3: brotp

I am constantly enamored with his (potential) relationship with Elrond. Especially during the early years, and then later upon (potential) rescue from his beach cryptid life. I go hard for forgiveness narratives -- and what I love so much about Kidnap Fam is that it is not a redemption narrative. At least not the way I write it. Maglor & Maedhros are not redeemed of their War Crimes because they decided to spare some kids. Or rather, they do not redeem themselves. Rather they are redeemed and they are sanctified by love, but also that doesn't happen when E&E are kids completely, because E&E are kids and they are bonding to their only caretakers, as kids to survive.

And yes love grew between them, but it isn't that love that I am fascinated by. It's the love that happened after. I am enamored with the idea that Elrond and Elros chose to love them once they were older and really understood things. And enamored with the idea that Elrond chose to forgive, because Someone Had To. Because the Oath will never be something that can be brought to Justice. There is no Justice for what was done in pursuit of the Silmarils. There is no Justice that would suffice for all the lives lost, for the lives that were destroyed, etc. etc. But I love the idea of Elrond going 'You know what, I'm Tired' and he chooses to be the one to bridge things and say: I forgive you. Because who is in a better position to forgive the Sons of Feanor than the grandson of Dior and great-grandson of Turgon, the son of Elwing and nephew of Elured and Elurin, who has some relation to pretty much everyone involved and who arguably has perhaps the best claim to Justice imaginable, because the man lost his parents, his Sindarin heritage (for a time), his entire goddamn childhood, and pretty much his entire early adulthood due to the Oath. He lost his birthright to two kingdoms.

He suffered so much and I am a slut for characters who suffer like that and choose forgiveness & peace. Not because it redeems the forgiven, but because there comes a point where justice alone will never be a satisfying end to the story, but forgiveness, to say enough is enough, to say let's end the cycle of violence, and no more -- because it brings peace to the person who forgives... yeah.... am I making any sense, here? I personally truly believe that the only satisfying end to the story of the Oath comes in grace. Justice can never be sufficient for all the evil that was done. And the point of forgiveness is that it is undeserved, and that it opens the door for healing.

4: notp

Maglor/any of the other Feanorians. I see this startling amount??? I also have this problem where I forget that White Fingon exists so every time I see White Fingon Russingon art my brain automatically assumes it's Maglor for a split second. Life is hard lmao.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head

His hair is black but it's like a raven's wing where it catches the light and turns all sorts of different colors. :)

6: favorite line from this character

Uh I'm gonna be very unoriginal:

"For Maglor took pity upon Elros and Elrond, and he cherished them, and love grew after between them, as little might be thought"

7: one way in which I relate to this character

Re my own interpretation I relate so hard to the tendency of being unable to let past mistakes go. It's one thing to have other people forgive you. It's quite another to learn to forgive yourself.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character

Any evil/abusive Maglor takes are just... yuck. I'll take "incredibly fucked up and in no way capable of raising children" but intentionally abusive is a take that I can't stand.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?

Problematic fav, of course!

[curiosity-killed]

Have you considered the possibility of Hualian with ace Hua Cheng and celibate (at least previously celibate) Xie Lian? Like Hua Cheng who just always understood that Xie Lian wouldn't be interested in a sexual relationship and was like, "sure, no problem here!" And then they reunite and Xie Lian is like "ah, this is awkward, about that actually 😅" before they communicate and learn what works for them? I usually really prefer their canon characterization but I think it would be a fun way to explore parallels and contrast between asexuality and celibacy (and actually wait. What if Hua Cheng we as aroace actually, wouldn't that do something cool to his obsessive devotion?) I'm not a fic writer but I know you've written asexual Xie Lian so I thought maybe you'd be ok with me rambling a little. (Love your fic by the way, thanks for writing!)

(I am always down with rambling!! :D)

i have not! but am intrigued abt the possibility

tbh I do usually headcanon both of them as ace-ish (varies between demi and asexual, mostly) but can definitely see this going down a fun path!

I am of the opinion that romance has relatively* little to do with Hua Cheng's devotion, so I'd still largely see his devotion as manifesting in similar ways to canon** (more or less—probs less kissing, but honestly possibly still flirting bc there's a thin line between flirting bc ur serious abt it and flirting bc hey it's sometimes kind of fun to flirt with the homies).

all of that to say I think it would be a really interesting continuation of their character development for Xie Lian to come to accept his worth and importance to someone while also being told 'no' in a way he is used to telling other people***. Meanwhile, fun time for Hua Cheng to actually say no to Xie Lian, which would go against so much of him!

As always, my great love of hualian stems in part from their manifestation of queerness outside of societal norms/expectations, so navigating "You Are The Reason I'm Alive" (for both of them) without the trappings of society's expectations that the Most Important Person in ur life is a romantic partner, is rlly interesting i think!!

*Yes, in canon it is romantic and I do enjoy the combo of his obsessive devotion + hualian romance but ppl who think Grand Devotion is exclusive to romantic love bore the shit out of me

**I touch on this in til my feet are memory (tho Xie Lian is aroace in that), in that Hua Cheng's devotion is devotion without expectation of reciprocation (this is a fandom hill i'll die on lol) and that it isn't diminished by lack of romantic/sexual potential with Xie Lian

***Yeah yeah I maintain my lack of emphasis on romance/sex as defining their relationship but I do think, as written, the romance is pretty important to XL's arc—which is not to negate the possibility so much as emphasize the opportunity for continued and different development

[crimeronan]

Thank you sm for the in-depth response! I’m unsure because I’m not autistic, just adhd, and also i don’t think my empathy is very low- no violent ideation, i do feel guilt, i don’t detach myself from people too easily, and social situations aren’t too hard anymore (though i did have to learn a lot and also mirror and mask a ludicrous amount i’m just not super conscious of it) - but i do think it is in some measure lower, at least to the point i was talking to my mum about my concern and at one point i said “well i mean, i don��t think i’m actually low empathy-“ and she just looks at me and says, incredibly firmly, “No, you are low empathy.” dhejdjdjdjd i will admit that there is a lot of internalized discomfort and fear about it happening to me rn so like. thank you. genuinely. seeing discussions about that and about unorthodox relationships (also aroace-spec! also feel very weird about that!) on your blog and about mental illness for all these years really is important! i really hope you’re doing well

assigned low empathy by mom FJDJFJFN that's SO funny. i Love it

and thank you! i've been aware since i was pretty young that i don't feel or want a lot of things i'm expected to, in a queer way And a neurodivergence way And a general lifestyle way. i've said no to a lot of expected staples and milestones to build my life on my terms with the relationships that make me happy and it's been really really good. and i don't see a lot of my feelings on relationships or empathy or general life choices put into words often, so.... i try to write them.

writing is how i contextualize and process my own issues and it's also a love letter to the many friends and family members who have influenced how i see the world, if i go back through literally Any of my fics i'll be able to find multiple places where i can tell you exactly who IRL influenced a scene and how and why. or who i wrote certain scenes for. love and grief and pain all play an enormous role in basically all of my heart projects bc they all play an enormous role in my day-to-day life so they're important to me

lacking empathy does not make a person broken or incapable of leading a fulfilling, loving life! i'm doing just fine (unrelated griping about chronic illness aside) and so is adam parrish and so are you 💕

[authoramalgam]

Man. I completely forgot about a hypothetical fnaf game I wanted to make until I randomly remembered the main character. Sooo. Imma post about it. Yee.

The game would partially work like a dating sim (but no actual dating or romance cause my aroace ass cannot write a relationship for love nor money) So it'd just all be platonic, meeting people, making griends, helping them out, learning more about them etc.

At least part of the game was that. I imagined it as having day shift and nightshift sections. In the day shift, you would do all the talking to people and etc. During the night shift you were trying to investigate the animatronics and what shady shit was going on with them and Fazbear Entertainment. )I don't know if the game was set in any particular fnaf location, possibly fnaf 2?)

The main character was named Ange. They were in their late twenties, lost their job, and decided to work at Freddy's to make ends meet while they looked for a better job. I didn't have much fleshed out for their background though.

Then there were the rest of the employees.

Sal (Short for Salvatore) was the manager/owner. He was like, an intentional red herring type guy. Very purposely played up as shady, possibly Mafia type. But he's actually not. He's a bit rough, having grown up doing a lot of shady stuff, but after his brother and sister in law died, leaving him to raise his nephew Seth, he decided to try and make himself better. He's like, the uncle that shows up, gives sage life advice, and then 'jokes' and says to tell him if anyone messes with you and he'll 'deal with them.'

Seth, as previously stated, is Sal's nephew. He mostly got hired because of nepotism, and he doesn't really do much other than hang out in the break room, high (medical marijuana for chronic pain) and eat snacks. Also, might've been able to see ghosts, but was so freaked out by them that he just avoided them (Another reason he stayed in the break room all the time.) Chill as hell.

Marcell was the restaurants 'chef.' In reality he lied on his resume, saying he could cook when he can barely operate a microwave. He lied because he was desperate for a job, and his criminal record (Petty theft, shoplifting, etc) made it hard to get a job. Thankfully (or maybe not?) Sal could give a fuck less about the food, since all the pizzas are just pre frozen. Sal is pretty hard on Marcell, because he sees himself in him, and wants him to get his shit together.

Leto was was some nonhuman entity (with no association to the murders or Afton) who just hung out in the building. Sal got sick of it scaring people, and said to basically either do a job, or he'd exorcise it himself. (Unclear if that'd have even worked.) In the end, Leto chose to be the janitor cause it liked collecting stuff people accidentally left at the pizzeria.

There was also an idea for a waitress character. She didn't have an official name, so Cierra was a placeholder (cause there were too many names that started with an S sound ;-;) And I went back and forth like crazy between her either being chill as hell and only really being there because she had nothing better to do over the summer, or like, a stereotypical mean rich girl who's parents forced her to get a 'normal job' to humble her. (Maybe I split both those ideas and make two. Eh.)

I also messed with the idea of phone guy or Afton showing up, because fnaf 2. But I wasn't sure if I was gonna do that much.

[corelliaxdreaming]

SWrarepairs 2023 Dear Creator Letter

This was so not supposed to be 2,000+ words, wtf...

First of all, thank you for writing for me! (And thank you for dealing with this massive letter omg.) No matter what, I absolutely can’t wait to see what you come up with. I’m pretty easy as far as fics go. If you want to ignore everything in this post and only incorporate the pairing, that’s fine! I enjoy anything from tooth-rotting fluff to soul-rending angst, any rating at all, and I only have a few DNWs. I’d prefer no noncon/dubcon/cheating/violence/etc between the main ship, but if they’re included elsewhere, as long as there’s a heads-up, that’s fine. I don't mind hard angst such as character death, even characters in the requested ship. Also please try to refrain from amatonormativity/compulsory sexuality – philosophies that all people inherently desire romance/sex and would be happier without them. As an aromantic asexual myself, I love a good ship, but that stuff isn't for every single person.

As for what I do like, my very favorite thing in the world is hurt/comfort, particularly of the emotional variety. If, even metaphorically, someone is crying and someone is hugging them, I am very happy. Being an anxiety sufferer myself, I also have a soft spot for seeing characters dealing with mental illness stuff, anxiety and depression particularly, especially if their partner/s are there being super supportive and helping them through it. I've also recently started therapy and working on my own coping skills, and I love to see my faves using them to help themselves/each other. Any kind of porn with feelings also never goes amiss. Being aroace, I absolutely love to see my faves being represented as on either or both of those spectrums. I know this is a romantic/sexual-based exchange, but if you felt like throwing in a queerplatonic relationship as well (or instead? Is that legal?), I'm all for that.

As you can probably tell from my request list, my absolute favorite part of Star Wars is the fighter pilots. I love the angst inherent in the constant battles and always being on call and losing people. The stress and exhaustion. Pilot/pilot pairings knowing they could lose the other in battle at any time. Pilot/non-pilot pairings with the non-pilot feeling so helpless as they watch their partner go off to fight and so relieved when they come back. Commanders hurting because they care about their pilots so much yet there’s only so much they can do to protect them, and every death hurts so much. Just – pilot feels!!

For similar reasons, I love JFO. Cal is a perfect character for me – all angsty and hurt and sad but also determined to do the right thing and learning and growing and u g h. He just needs a nice boyfriend.

I know we're carefully separating different SW sub-fandoms, and that's kind of complicated, but I will mention I prefer the Legends side of things when there's a choice (unless stated otherwise). But I'm not a canon hater, and it’s always interesting to see where what can happen when the two get mixed together. The X-wing book series (and the era in general) is by far my favorite time period. I’m currently reading NJO: Star by Star and will be finished by the time of reveals, so if possible I’d prefer something without (or with very light) spoilers past the end of that book. I'm also interested in seeing things set during this time.

I prefer to see any OC/OC ships with unspecified genders be queer in at least one way – whether it be one or both of then is trans/enby, mspec, acespec, arospec, etc etc. That doesn't necessarily mean they can't be m/f, but queer aspects, please. :)

I think we still include our own AO3 links on these just in case, so here’s that – https://archiveofourown.org/users/icandrawamoth/profile.

As for thoughts on the particular pairings I requested:

Wedge Antilles/Wes Janson (C-EU)

I'm interested in how the Fab Four's relationships change in canon now that Tycho is out of the picture. Especially with Wes and Wedge, once Hobbie is also gone post-Hoth. Two FACPOV stories have shown us these two are close, with Wes being Rogue Squadron's XO. Surely I wasn't the only one who thought for a hot second they were gonna hook up in the ROTJ one?

Wyl Lark/Sonogari (C-EU)

The books tell us this relationship just sort of didn't work out, and I respectfully disagree. Wyl deserves a nice, soft boyfriend to help him will of his nice, softness (and sadness) – even if he does die later.

Original Downed Rebel Pilot/Original Farmer Hiding Them From the Authorities (OT) Original Overworked Rebellion Therapist/Original Overworked Rebellion Medic (OT)

These both seem like great opportunities for h/c! Especially the therapist/medic. Such mutual potential angst and comfort. :D

Idealistic Resistance Pilot/Jaded Former Rebellion Pilot (ST)

This sounds like fun. I'd prefer to not see it that the Resistance pilot just “fixes” the Rebellion pilot's views. Maybe more like they affect each other and more both come closer to the middle of that binary.

Pilot Who Stayed With the New Republic/Their Resistance Pilot Lover (ST)

Juicy! Would love to see it focus on their different ideologies, especially if it's one of my fave things where the NR pilot doesn't necessary disagree with the Resistance but just isn't the kind of person who can leave their whole life behind and live like that – and they can still do good where they are. Would love to see the Resistance pilot understand this, even if they are frustrated by it. And at the end of day, even if they don’t quite see eye to eye, their love is strong.

Tallissan Lintra/Paige Tico (ST)

I still ask myself constantly how I fell in love with Tallie with like five seconds of screentime and two lines of dialogue, but here I am. Paige is my fave lady to ship her with. I like the dynamic that it's very much Tallie's actual job to protect Paige while in battle. (I know I can't actually request additional character, so totally feel free to ignore the rest of this section.) It's be nice to see Tallie be friends with Rose, as with the sisters being so close, I feel like that would be a thing. Quadruple bonus points for any mention of Tallie's sister, Kallie, who was mentioned for like two sentences in the ROTJ junior novel.

Cal Kestis (JFOS)/Wyl Lark (C-EU)

When I absolutely fell in love with Cal even before JFO came out, I needed a good boy to ship him with. The game didn't really provide, so I went looking elsewhere in the saga and came up with my other favorite good, soft boy at the time: Wyl Lark. I played with the idea of Cal somehow getting cryofrozen or whatever and waking up the same age in Wyl's time, or Wyl somehow getting transported to Cal's time, but if you choose to write this, is whatever you wanna. Also a fan of Force-sensitive Wyl. Obviously you're not beholden to this, but I headcanon Cal as asexual bi and Wyl as demisexual pan.

Bode Akuna/Cal Kestis (JFOS)

And then Survivor gave us Bode! At first my headcanons with them were very soft, and then – oof, that reveal. Really anything goes here that involves these two genuinely caring for each other. Canon-compliant, AUs, whatever. I don't tend to read/write a lot of Jedi, and I've loved what I've seen of these two connecting through the Force if that comes out in time. I also looove the idea of Cal being a virgin when he gets together with Bode and Bode being all gentle and caring and leading him through his first time. (I mentioned above no dubcon/noncon, and I know some people would consider Bode's identity stuff that – I'm cool with this pairing, no matter how you play that.) As mentioned above, though you're obviously not beholden to it, I do headcanon Cal as asexual (and both he and Bode as bi), and it would also be cool to see them figuring this out together.

Wedge Antilles/Tycho Celchu (Any), Wedge Antilles/Tycho Celchu (Legends)

*yelling* My #1 OTP! 10/10 will adore anything where they’re together. Something set during that first six months after Tycho’s defection where Wedge was afraid to get close to him and wouldn’t even call him by his first name? Yep. Any type of Lusankya-related angst? Yep. Trial-related angst? Yep. Tycho comforting Wedge when the burdens of command are too much? Yep. Wedge comforting Tycho when the burdens of command are too much? Yep. Anything about what they're doing during all that off-page time in early NJO? Yep. Role-reversals of any kind? Yep. Literally anything? Yeeeep. (Bonus points if anything with Tycho set in NJO features him Not Vibing with the Jedi's pacifism bs.) Genuinely my favorite thing in the world is to just beat one of these guys (usally Tycho, but either way is great) over the head with angst and pain until they break, then have the other one gently put them back together/help them put themselves back together. <333

Nejaa Halcyon/Scerra Halcyon/Rostek Horn (Legends)

Look me in the eye tell me there wasn't something with these three. (Okay, I respect it being what it is canonically, but also.)

Tycho Celchu/Corran Horn (Legends)

You know those things you start shipping as a joke and then – oops, feelings? Yeah. At some point along the way, I just got really invested in these two being friends, and I’m interested in that becoming into romance as well. I especially love the idea of them really bonding after Corran’s return from Lusankya, with having that shared trauma between them. Corran leaning on Tycho to help him though it, Tycho finally having someone to talk to who really gets what he went through. Or maybe it’s before that, Corran trying to deal with being attracted to Tycho while also not trusting him? Big headcanons on Corran being bi and not quite ready to accept it. The two of them struggling while in quarantine on the Lusankya together. Or even something later on, once all of that is done with and they trust each other and are flying together. Tycho is pretty eager to jump to help Corran during I, Jedi. Or maybe Tycho supporting Corran through his exile nonsense in NJO? (Bonus points if anything with Tycho set in NJO features him Not Vibing with the Jedi's pacifism bs.) Anything goes.

Wedge Antilles/Corran Horn (Legends)

That said, I also got a little spark of “what if this pairing?” on my last X-wing reread. Maybe something to do with Wedge's reluctance to get close to the new Rogues, but Corran getting under his skin anyway? Nothing really specific, just intrigued by this premise.

Wedge Antilles/Tycho Celchu/Luke Skywalker (Legends), Tycho Celchu/Luke Skywalker (Legends)

With the popular pairing being Wedge/Luke, and my personal OTP being Wedge/Tycho, I'm just kinda interested in smooshing those two together. Maybe two are already together and third pines? Idk. On a similar note, just Tycho/Luke. Again, nothing real specific for these two pairings either, just find the idea interesting. (I am intrigued by the possibility of Force-sensitive Tycho, so maybe that could be something to play with?)

Wedge Antilles/Broak Vessery (Legends)

The always-wonderful Rogue Podron podcast put me onto this one with how they talked up Vessery and his interactions with Wedge. I like what similar characters these two guys are: both skilled pilots, super dedicated to the people flying with them. Not exactly allies, but not exactly enemies, being forced to work together for a greater goal. I like the idea of something happening between them on Isard's base, like non-even-quite-friends-with-benefits, just an understanding of each other as people and blowing off steam, maybe getting some comfort. Again, I know I can't really request additional characters, but bonus points for Tycho opining on the situation, whether he doesn't like it or is encouraging.

Wedge Antilles/Tycho Celchu/Wes Janson/Derek “Hobbie” Klivian (Legends)

Ah, the classic OT4. I just love how these four are always together in the X-wing fics. Friends, lovers, any combination among them? Golden. Just some random ideas: How the four of them got together and in what order. Dealing with Wedge being the only one there when Tycho got back from Lusankya and Wes and Hobbie not being able to see him for some time. Dealing with their separation while Hobbie and Tycho are with the Rogues and Wedge and Wes are with the Wraiths. Or, y'know, anything. ;)

[like-eachothersghosts]

            When I say ‘I wish I could be more creative’ I mean it weird. From the outside, I am. I go to art school for fuck’s sake. Art of all kinds is such a huge part of my life and who I am. And I know I'm good at it. Great, even. I’m great at drawing. I'm great at painting. At writing. At crafting. I'm pretty okay at guitar. I think I can sing (I know I can) (I'm good) (I'm just too dysphoric about my singing voice to ever use it) I am surrounded by art at all times (art school, remember) (bookshelf is an entire wall) (majority of floor space in my room is covered art supplies and half-finished projects (I’ll never finish them) (fuck, I want to) I am Always listening to music (its own whole thing) (I’ll get back to that)

            But I can’t help but feel like a fraud. Not in the usual sense. Not in the ‘I’m not talented enough to belong here, to have my work shown at this level’ (of course, I do feel that. We all do. But I’m talking about something else) I can do nothing without some kind of reference. ‘Working from imagination’ is not something I’ve Ever been good at, even as a kid. I want to. I really do. It’s frustrating as hell to want to draw, to paint, to write, to make something, but have absolutely no idea as to what or how. I know I have an imagination. A very good one at that (by that I mean I can visualize 2D and 3D objects in full color, texture, and detail. When I have music in my head, it is in the original singer’s voice with full instrumentation) If I were to have an idea, I could perfectly visualize it. Fully render it. But there is no idea. There never is. I feel like I must be broken in some way. God, I want to Create. Not just copy. The problem is, that doesn’t seem like the kind of skill you can learn. God, I want to learn.

And the most obvious and most frustrating example is music. My relationship with music is something so complicated that I still don’t fully understand it myself. It has to do with the neurodivergency, I’m sure, but I’ve never met anyone like me. I Always have music in my head. Always. As far back as I can remember. Until recently, I thought everyone did. And in full detail, as I mentioned previously, which I also believed was a universal experience until recently. Typically, it’s just a short clip, repeating endlessly until it switches to another song. It can be distracting. Because of this, and maybe because of other things (who knows) I am actively listening to music at most times. Almost always if I’m out doing anything. If I can control the music, if I can make it full songs, and have those songs constantly changing, I can think more clearly, pay better attention. (People have a hard time understanding that) (I have a hard time explaining it/convincing them) It fills up the pattern seeking part of my brain, which lets me do things other than search for patterns.

This would be fine, but for the part where it stops me from creating music of my own (at least I think it’s that) (God, I hope it’s that) (otherwise it’s back to the problem from two paragraphs up) (and that possibility hurts more) (hurts a lot actually) I want to be in a band. I’m perfectly happy playing someone else’s music. (Really! I am!) (it’s more about the playing Song with friends than it being My song) I don’t want to be the main guy (be that frontman or prime writer/lyricist) But I would like to make my own shit. I’d love to write music. I have no idea how anyone writes music. My head is too filled with melodies to make a new one. Lyrics are their own problem as well. I don’t know what the fuck I Could write about. I’m aroace. That knocks out a lot. I’m not fucked up enough to write about that either. Shit hasn’t been easy, but it’s never been That Bad. And I’m good now. No angst, no feeling of inferiority or of not being enough (for someone, for myself, for life, etc.) I’m happy! I’m doing well! I don’t have anything to say. I don’t know what I’d want to say. I feel like I could work on lyrics with someone else, like I could edit and add on and shit, but I don’t have someone else, at least not yet. And I’d still feel like I couldn’t take the credit because the Ideas wouldn’t be mine. And I am a firm believer in cringe is dead, but I feel like anything I’d come up with would be pretentious bullshit, and/or shit that makes things seem worse than they are. I don’t want to sell a false version of the tortured artist. I want to write lyrics. I want to write poetry. I want to write. But I have nothing. I want to learn. I don’t know how. I don’t know if I can. God, I want to.

When I say ‘I wish I could be more creative’, I put the emphasis on the ‘could’, because I can’t help but feel like I can’t.

[kingofthewilderwest]

i lowkey found astrid's "you're getting in the way of her happiness" and "don't you want to settle down with a wife?" comments pretty amanormative and heteronormative. i'm a loveless aroace so seeing her somewhat antagonise tuffnut abt the way he acted (when i'd act in a similar way) rubbed me weirdly

Totes don’t remember precisely where this was in the HTTYD franchise... extremely rusty and haven’t watched RTTE and other materials in years... but I do remember getting to these lines and feeling uncomfortable as an aroace myself.

Like. The HTTYD television series has never been “cutting edge” regarding representational matters, and I’ve never expected it to cut any edges, though we also see a learning curve. Early jokes from ROB/DOB days where calling someone a girl was an insult got dropped by RTTE. But there was always an amatonormative edge to the DreamWorks Dragons RTTE episodes, too. It’s why I sighed over such things as hooking Mala and Dagur up, Fishlegs and Heather up, Snotlout getting his own quick romance plot with the Wingmaidens... plot moves that ultimately didn’t make much sense regarding their personalities, but let us swim in a world where everyone’s gotta try romance sometime, right? GOTTA HOOK THEM CHARACTERS UP. [sighghghg]

It is to my biggest, most immense relief that throughout the entire series, Tuffnut never entered a real romantic fling. At least you guys kept that for me. It’s one reason Tuff’s special to me... his values are in his family, and he doesn’t need romance to enjoy his life. That’s important. And while I appreciate the concept of writing a story where a character who isn’t romantic butts heads with someone whose values are romantic, peeps gotta be careful about how that’s written, in case it accidentally turns into an amatonormative world where the aromantic individual is expected to reduce their love for the sake of the romantic person being swept away by a romance-only focus that isn’t exactly the model of healthy social dynamics (we shouldn’t be dropping all our friends and family and treating one human as all emotional fulfillment once we enter something romantic, and I’m tired of that treated as normal and desirable happiness).

From my vaaaaaaaaaague recollection of how this conversation went down that you mentioned, it pinged so amatonormative it hurt. It pinged me as bad. I didn’t just feel weird, I cringed. It didn’t ping me as surprising because society talks that way so often, but I was like, “Hm yeah, NO.”

If you love someone and are close to them, and you’ve been their happiness for years and years and years, you are not by nature interfering in someone’s “happiness” because one person entered a romance. Nor are we automatically in the pinnacle of happiness once we start a romance, and suddenly all other relationships become an automatic interference of it. Are there ways in which you could sabotage someone’s romantic relationship? Yes. But are there plenty of ways in which people in romantic relationships intentionally or unintentionally sabotage their connections with other people uncomfortably, cutting them off and devaluing them? Also yes. And are there plenty of ways in which we’re happier when we have familial and romantic and platonic relationships all balancing our lives instead of one cutting out the other? Yes. 

A real solution isn’t like what Astrid implicitly suggests, where you should back off on someone else’s “happiness” (because you’re an innate interference) and go seek your own romance to be happy. Because what’s she suggesting? Clearly hooking up is what you should actually be doing to quit feeling lonesome... instead of working it out with the person whose relationship you are struggling with. 

There’s a miscommunication going down. And it’s not saying that someone like Tuffnut reacted perfectly. But. We need to endorse communicating with people we feel aren’t giving us attention anymore. We need to talk through about where we feel hurt and why. We need to talk things through until everyone’s on the same page and at least understands where everyone wants to spend their time and love.

Sorry I’m not talking very specifically about it, and hope my memories don’t serve me wrong. At this point in time, I don’t have the canon so snugly memorized that I can immediately pinpoint a quote into an exact episode anymore. I’d need reference of where it happened.