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hxrtnett · 29 days ago

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pasture child – luke castellan

𖤓°⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ luke castellan falls in love with his town’s church girl before he’s sent off to camp half-blood, he thinks of her with every return. he tries to find her years later after he never returned. inspired by pasture child by dominic fike.

warnings/mentions. swearing, religion mention (following lyrics of song), kissing, luke grows up and never dies in this timeline, talking of female assets (teenage boy antics but not terrible), mental heath & cps (luke’s mother), i also delayed his full time or age to his admission to camp half-blood so they’re 15/16 ish in the scenes before he’s gone forever, praying to mother mary, atheist luke

pairing. luke castellan x mortal!fem!reader

at a young age, luke always found himself in the church near home. the door was always open in the spring time, and always unlocked in the colder weather. he was always allowed some shelter or quiet when his mother had her times.

luke wasn’t quite unknown in the town, everyone knew of his mother’s mental health, how it fluctuated frequently and sometimes he’d be watched over as she was hospitalized. luke had ran away from home and cps many times. so, his name was known in the town.

luke’s only enjoyment in his younger years and young teenage years was camp half-blood, and when he went to the church and saw you; the pastor’s daughter of the church he escaped to.

every time he ran away or returned home from summer camp, luke found his way to you. as he grew up and you did too, you both talked about childish things that led to normal teenager topics. you were more than the pastor’s child.

luke slowly grew a heavy crush on you, now as a teenager he watched you grow older and more rebellious to your father’s rules or restrictions. you always wore long skirts and modern shirts or dresses, sometimes pants and a fitting top that your father grimaced at, despite you respecting his modesty rule. you hated it though, luke always heard you complain about it, especially in the start of the summer.

“it’s getting warm out, i now,” you looked around to make sure your father wasn’t near, “sneak clothes in my bag, dad lets me drive the truck now so i change when im gone.” you confessed to luke. he was surprised, you were good and never disobeyed your father or your church, but he was wrong. “what do you wear?” luke asked, curious and looking around also.

“i’ll wear tank tops out without a sweater, skirts that are above my knees, or shorts. my dad doesn’t know i have em, my mama does but it’s just a secret. can you keep a secret?” you asked, informing him on a vision he was missing out on in the summer. he could picture you in shorts, your legs on display and the jean curved to your bottom perfectly, matching it with a tank top that showed your cleavage or a bit of your stomach, alongside that your gold cross pressed against your chest. the thought made his teenage mind run wild. he nodded at the words, “i can keep a secret.” he spoke, looking at you with wide eyes.

your smile blossomed and he felt his heart beat harder, he always had feelings for you, but he knew that this was the last time he’d be with you; his mother had died. he had no where to stay once he left. your father opened the door and you both split apart before smiling at your father. “hi dad.” you greeted him softly, crossing your legs and clasping your hands together. “we were talking about summertime.” you said softly, pushing your hair out of your face.

your father nodded and his eyes flickered between you both, a bit suspicious. he brushed it off and fully looked at the demi-god, “luke, do you want to have a funeral for your mother? i know you both aren’t a member truly, but you’re here a lot. we respect you and care for you and your loss. we can honor her.” your father offered.

luke looked between you and your father, seeing the striking similarity in your faces but difference in the way you presented yourselves. your father composed, you more relaxed. “yes sir, thank you father.” luke agreed, hating the words he spoke but he did it out of respect. he loved his mother, he missed her truly. the three of you spoke the plan and you placed your hand on luke’s arm gently, making his face burn and look sheepish under your father’s stare.

you two were soon dismissed by him, walking through the church. “where do you go in the summer? i wish you could be here.” you said softly, bumping shoulders with him. “oh, summer camp. the one cps lady found it for me and takes me away as a break from it all.” luke informed. it was true actually, the cps lady was actually a camp half-blood counselor who was set to find him, it explained his mother’s insanity and the weird things he saw. “when are you leaving?” you asked, fingers finding his and intertwining your hands, looking around to see if your father was around. he forbid the action with boys, only dismissing it when you had your hand on top of luke’s, not interlaced.

“i leave this weekend.” he informed, keeping hold of your hand, “i’ll call you before i go” he added, both of you standing in a vacant hallway. you leaned against the wall, “you will?” you asked, hopeful. “yeah, always. one of our night calls before i go.” he assured, hand still holding yours. throughout the years, you both called one another at night around ten, though your parents rule was lights out at nine. you both talked amongst one another quietly, luke and you both going silent every now and then if you thought you heard a noise in the night. sometimes you fell asleep on the line, making him laugh and have to hang up.

the next and new idea you presented surprised him, “can i see you tomorrow night?” you asked, curious. tomorrow was friday, he left sunday night. luke thought about it, “sneaking out?” he asked you, taken aback slightly at your change. typically he saw you in the daytime, this was different. “yeah! cmon we can go for a walk under the stars, wouldn’t that be lovely?” you spoke, bribing him before hearing a door close nearby. you both stood up straight and you put your hands behind your back, acting like nothing different was going on.

you smiled at your dad who walked to the office, it instantly dropped once he left, luke could feel your nerves; you weren’t the only one with a shitty parent. “we can.” luke said softly.

so luke did as told, standing under the streetlight at 10pm down your street, waiting for you.

meanwhile you climbed out your window, a stone under the sill and your door closed per usual. you had a fence to climb up and down by your window, so it was easy to leave.

luke expected to see you meet him in your normal attire, but it took him by surprise when you ran down the street in your tennis shoes, shorts, a tank top, and a zip up hoodie you didn’t even zip up. you stopped in front of him, smiling as you breathed heavily, “hi.” you spoke, making him smile in return, “hi.” he said back, cupping your face to kiss you.

this wasn’t the first time he did this, you two had met in private many times in the church, kissing a bit. even in public you two found your ways to be romantic, but not enough for the church ladies to spread gossip. and you weren’t terribly rebellious, so they couldn’t say anything, you just had a secret romance your father didn’t know of. your mother knew, she knew everything, and she didn’t dare tell your father because she once was like you. there had been arguments between you both over it, so she picked her battles and you picked yours.

you loved luke, you hoped to marry him. a lovesick teenager you were, but he was perfect to you. you kissed him again before pulling him in the direction of the playground, planning to lay on the playscape and look at the stars.

you both spoke amongst one another, luke’s hand in yours while you laid beside each other. “i prayed for the first time.” he admitted, making you look at him in shock, “wow! really?” you asked, “the quiet atheist prayed, how surprising.” you teased, making him laugh. you obviously didn’t know the demi-god fully, he knew gods were real. he wasn’t truly an atheist, though he didn’t like his father and the other gods that ignored him. he just had some resentment towards any form of god presented towards him, but for once he did pray to the god you looked towards. your laughter died down, “who? and what did you ask?” you pried, looking at him.

he noticed the sparkle in your eyes, the moon illuminating your features, if you were a demi-god like him he knew you’d be aphrodite’s daughter. but, you were a mortal, and he couldn’t love you like you wanted. you both had two different worlds, two different lives, he only was immersed in yours when you were beside him. he also knew he’d live longer than you, and it’d pain him to see you pass when he’d still be alive. but he savored the moments with you because somehow, the monsters didn’t bother him when you were near, and the demi-god curses paused when you were with him.

“i asked mary to watch over my mother, since you constantly say how comforting it is to pray to her.” luke spoke, telling you the full truth. he also asked his father to show up instead of being a deadbeat. but that wouldn’t be answered. you smiled again, “holy shit luke castellan, you asked a higher power for something.” you said in surprise. he rolled his eyes, “shut up.” he spoke, nudging you as you laughed. you sat up and looked down at him, “i don’t expect you to be a child of god,” how ironic, “but it’s cool you tried out something new cause of me.” you finished, leaning down to kiss him. luke met you halfway and sat up slowly, kissing you, his hands finding your figure he knew and now fully saw, enjoying the feel of your soft skin.

you both stopped eventually, knowing it was too risky to be out as the sun was starting to rise. luke knew you would fall asleep beside him laying under the stars, you needed the rest he could easily miss. luke laced his hand with yours, walking back to your home for the last time. luke watched as you climbed up towards your window, eyes watching your backside a bit too much, then leaving back to his house that was slowly emptying.

you called for the last time saturday night after the funeral, not knowing it was the last time you’d see one another and speak before his return. the call was longer, luke tried to get every ounce of words from you, getting to hear your soft laugh and voice. he knew it would be the last time he heard it until he returned, and he didn’t know when that was. luke had some responsibilities and figures to return to at camp half-blood, and he had no other home. he didn’t plan to return to your state, return to the town. though you were there, he couldn’t stay in a foster house just to see you. he couldn’t risk the monsters making him seem insane in public.

“goodnight luke.” you said softly, making tears form in his eyes softly, he smiled and his breath hitched. “goodnight y/n, sleep well, i love you.” he admitted, taking the jump. you were silent on the other end, “i love you too. be safe.” you said softly, soon he could hear you hang up.

finding you was difficult. luke returned to your hometown, scarred and much older, twenty-three now. he had battled, went to war, betrayed others, got his monsters under control, found his father, was possessed by kronos, killed kronos and nearly himself, and all he wanted was you in the end.

he knew he betrayed you, and how it was hard for a mortal and demi-god to live and love. but finding you and making it up to you was what he survived for.

he found your father, who was surprised at his return, and asked for your location. he learned that you moved states and resented your family. he also learned that you became a well known author, writing books for those who dared to break out of their forced norms. the books had striking characters, all fictional. but, you released an autobiography the year he returned. luke bought it instantly, as your father refused to promote it.

luke struggled with reading the mortal language, though it wasn’t as difficult as he last remembered. luke managed to read through your book, reading about your life and learning your traumas and resentment you dared to share. in none of the pages luke existed, he thought maybe you alluded to him as one of the guys you talked about, but the timeline didn’t add up in his mind.

luke felt a bit hurt, how he returned to you so dearly and saw how dead he was to you by not reading anything about him.

however, when luke opened the book for the final time, he managed to finally catch the dedication.

dedicated to: luke castellan, wherever you are, if you’re even alive. i still think of our last call.

luke read it, slightly appalled. his thumb brushed over the words as if he could bring them to life and bring you into his arms again, holding you against him. luke knew he could navigate through your world easily, he could blend in as a mortal and find you.

so, he did.

luke rented a car and read the back of the book where it stated where you resided in. he wanted to find you and tell you everything he lived through and tell you the truth, despite knowing the dangers it could bring to both of you. he just wanted you in his arms again.

part two?

#luke castellan x reader #luke & hxrtnett #luke castellan x fem!reader #luke castellan x you #luke castellan x y/n #luke castellan x mortal!reader #luke castellan fic #luke castellan imagine #luke castellan

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harmoonix · 2 years ago

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♡ Astro Love Observations ♡

~ Give me everything tonight~

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♦️♡♦️Juno aspecting the ascendant/Juno in the 1st house: Husband/Wife material, these people charm everyone when they met new people. People become attached so fast with this aspect and some people can see you as a wife/hubby material, also these natives are extremely loyal in relationships

♦️♡♦️Juno in the 7th house/Juno in Libra/Juno aspecting Venus, makes the native very charming and flirty, they are so curious when they start a relationship and want to know everything about the other person, they can develop feelings very fast aswell

♦️♡♦️Juno in the 11th house/Juno in Aquarius/Juno aspecting Uranus, gives the native a flow of energy that so many love, a lot of people like to have such people around because of their charisma and their authenticity, friends to lovers kind of love/relationship 💗

♦️♡♦️Juno in the 5th house/Juno in Leo/Juno aspecting the Sun makes the native to have a unique charisma and that can often attract people into them, their personality is so warm and welcoming, 🥹💗 the spouse can be obsessed with them at this point 👉🏼💗

♦️♡♦️The ascendant in the Juno persona chart can tell about a important thing in your relationship/something you and your specific person have special, for example Gemini Asc in the Juno Persona Chart can be communication with each other and expressing your feelings together 💗

♦️♡♦️Juno aspecting the asteroid of love Eros [433], your relationship with your specific person is gonna be so intense 🔥🔥, definitely something hot is going around 👀

♦️♡♦️Eros asteroid [433] - Mars aspects = 👀🔥👀, these natives are so sensual and so sexy 😍, they definitely like to do dirty things 😭

♦️♡♦️Asteroid Cupido [763] - Lilith aspects = Now, natives with these aspects love deep and hard they become attach very easily and can catch feelings so fast for a person in just seconds, they are radiating attractive energy so easy is 🤌🏼🤌🏼🤌🏼

♦️♡♦️Asteroid Cupido [763] in the 6th/10th/11th houses, with this asteroid in those houses makes the people around you to find you attractive and aswell at your job, colleagues can end up crushing over you and that can happen randomly sometimes

♦️♡♦️Venus - Neptune aspects can fall in love very easily and blindly sometimes, they really want to feel love and feel loved by their specific person, even with them being delulu sometimes, their love is still pure

♦️♡♦️ Having a Stellium in the 7th house (3 or more than 3 planets in that house) makes the native to want to be relationship very bad, esp if Venus is there, the native will seek for a partner and for love/bounding

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And you're here in my heart

And my heart will go on and on

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♦️♡♦️ Having a Libra Moon or Moon in the 7th house, makes the native to seek for romance from a young age, most of times these natives want to have a relationship and someone to love, and also if they are single they can be depressed because of this

♦️♡♦️Sun/Moon in the 8th house have this mystic aura that can make other attracted into them, they are full of secrets and shadows embraced by romance

♦️♡♦️Venus in fire signs makes the native to be flirty and to have this unique charisma that makes people to be into them and to be very interested about these natives, Alexa Demie (the girl who plays Maddie in Euphoria has a Sag Venus and she attracts a lot of people with her looks and her charisma)

♦️♡♦️Ascendant - Venus aspects: Your beauty makes other people to be very interested in you, 😍🤌🏼 you can have a certain thing about your style that other people might like, it can be the way you dress or something physical (applying for both harsh and positive aspects)

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It's been said and done

Every beautiful thought's been already sung

And I guess right now, here's another one

So your melody will play on and on, with the

best of 'em

You are beautiful, like a dream come alive

Incredible

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♦️♡♦️Ascendant - Pluto aspects: Your mysticism babe 😍🤌🏼, because of your misterious nature you can attract a lot of people, often people can talk about you and how misterious you are, that makes them crazy (apllying for both harsh and positive aspects)

♦️♡♦️ Ascendant - Neptune aspects: Your aura enchants many people's hearts, the way you look might be enchanting and dreamy, your eyes pay an important role in this, natives with these aspects have beautiful eyes 😍🤌🏼

♦️♡♦️ Earth Mars or Mars in Earth Degrees [2°, 6°, 10°, 18°, 22°] - the way you are giving "Boss" energy is immaculate, that makes people to find you very charming and attractive (The energy is not always dominant but rather submissive for those with Virgo and Virgo Degrees, that can also be attractive because a lot of people like the submissiveness/kinks)

♦️♡♦️Jupiter in Libra/In the 7th house or at Libra Degrees [7°,19° degrees ] , i don't have enough words these placements 😭💗 is just so romantic and so cute, your spouse is literally the most romantic person out there and that type of person who is like "For you i would do everything" this placement radiates ultra Romeo and Juliet vibes 🤌🏼💗🤌🏼

♦️♡♦️Jupiter in Sagittarius/9th house, or at Sag Degrees [9°,21°] These placements are so 🥹 cute to have, your spouse is that type of person like "I will always be by your side" is because you can learn from each other and to explore each other in such cute eyes, your spouse can be very optimistic and generous often known because of their golden heart 🥹💗🤌🏼

♦️♡♦️Jupiter in Virgo/6th house, or at Virgo Degrees [6°, 18°] These placements are so special, even with Jupiter being in detriment in Virgo the energy is still felt, your spouse is that type of person who likes to help others when they need to be very kind in general, your spouse is someone who works hard for their dreams someone very ambitious, the type of "We go through this together, okay Darling?" 😭🤌🏼💗💗💗💗 Even in Vedic chart to have this placement is screaming cuteness/you can both meet at work/job

♦️♡♦️Jupiter in Leo/Jupiter in the 5th house or at Leo Degrees [5°, 17°. 29°] these placements are giving and screaming royalty relationship, is that type of "You deserve to be treated like a queen because you are my queen" 😭💗 I swear this placement is so romantic, your spouse can seek for your attention so much and so often when they want your attention they become clingy and it so cute 😭🤌🏼 GOD this is so eidjfkeoekekmw cute

♦️♡♦️ Venus in the last houses of a chart [10th, 11th, 12th houses] Saturn, Uranus and Neptune have influence over these houses, most natives with Venus in these houses can often experience stages of Deja Vu when they met someone, even creating spiritual dreams about it

♦️♡♦️Venus - Uranus aspects can often attract different types of partners, your next partner can have something different than your ex and it goes on and on [if you identify as LGBTQ+ these placements can often attract people from the same gender]

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No one compares

You stand alone, to every record I own

Music to my heart that's what you are

A song that goes on and on

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♦️♡♦️ Having Prominent Pisces or Libra [in the big 3/big 6] in your chart makes you a hopeless romantic, you hope for finding true love and you wish for a long relationship beside the person you love the most in this world 🌎🥀

♦️♡♦️ Scorpio or Capricorn [in big 3/in big 6] in your chart makes someone very loyal and serious about their relationships and about their partners, they are here to jump from bed to bed but rather to make a serious long relationship with someone they truly love

Big 3: Sun, Moon and Rising/Ascendant

Big 6: Sun, Moon, Rising, Venus, Mars, Mercury

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Today i come with a very lovely post guys 😍, is about passion, love, romance, and sensuality. I really hope you like such content is so lovely to make it because I love to combine astrology and relationships especially this type of content 😍

I hope you have a good start of week 😍💗! Anndddd never forget to share your love so you will receive love aswell!💗💗💗💗

Harmoonix 💋

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joicecubes · 1 month ago

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HEY!!!!! HEY YOU!! (sits you down to listen to me yap about my queer headcanons for gravity falls characters)

mabel - okay lets get her out of the way. this girl is queer as fuck. she may not realize it yet, but in her teenage years i know she’s experimented with every single label and microlabel in existence. she’d try out hundreds of neopronouns. she realizes her obsession with boys as a kid was a result of comphet. i don’t have a specific label for her because i think in the end she’d discover she can’t make herself identify with any one label. because she’s just mabel! unlabeled and proud.

dipper - do i even have to say it… he’s trans. i think every queer person in this fandom headcanons him to be trans. moving on

stanley - he’s kinda unlabeled too, but for a reason opposite to mabel’s. ladies, gentlemen, doesn’t matter to him! i think its fair to assume he grew up believing that being gay was wrong, it was the 60s and 70s and his dad’s a piece of shit, but as he traveled the country and met so many different people and then witnessed the times changing around him… he’d just. grow into his attraction for men. like, yeah i like men? so what? he doesn’t care for labels. “bisexual, mabel? pansexual? quit making up words!”

(more starting with stanford under the cut this is gonna be sorta long)

stanford - hehehheee okay this is my favorite. i’ve thought about his sexuality a lot. he’s definitely gay to me, and i don’t have much reasoning for that other than like… my heart is telling me that’s the right answer. but he’s also definitely on the aroace spectrum. i personally think he’s demi or grayromantic, he feels romantic attraction VERY rarely and its part of the reason why he felt so helpless in the dating department as a teenager, and also why as an adult later on he tells fiddleford he doesn’t understand romance. he’s hardly ever experienced it! and he wouldn’t really KNOW he identifies with those labels until he’s back in his dimension and mabel is in her obsessed-with-queer-microlabels phase. he hears mabel say “demiromantic” and, being the nerd he is, immediately wants to know what this new word means and why he’s never heard of it before. so mabel rolls a big-ass whiteboard in and starts Mabel’s Guide to the Aromantic Spectrum! ford learns something about himself that day.

fiddleford - HE’S GAY. he’s gay. he’s so gay. i know he canonically has a wife but he literally leaves emma may to work on this mysterious project with his best and only MALE friend from college like… BE so fr. he made ford TWO christmas gifts and forgot to get anything for his wife!! i imagine his marriage to emma may was more of a way for him to deny his sexuality and live what he believes to be a “normal” life. and that obviously doesnt excuse the neglect to his family (because what the fuck fiddleford) but its how i personally make sense of his behavior.

bill cipher - bill transcends human comprehension of gender and sexuality. bill is just bill. but in human terms he’s a lover of all genders. as long as he can manipulate them, they’re fair game! (sorry ford)

wendy - okayyy yesss i know i used the comphet excuse once with mabel but i’m using it again god dammit. with the way wendy talks about her past boyfriends and how we see her be so vaguely invested in her relationship with robbie, it makes me think she’s either a lesbian or somewhere on the aromantic spectrum. she’s just not super interested! but she gives guys chances because why the hell not and is never super into any of it, eventually they break up, and she moves on with her life. i imagine sometime after high school is when she reflects on that and thinks… huh. was i ever attracted to men at all?

soos - saving the most anticlimactic for last… soos is straight to me. but he’s an ENTHUSIASTIC ally :)

thanks for reading i really like overthinking the theoretical queer identities of my favorite characters have a nice day (and let me know if you’re headcanons differ i would love to hear what people think!!)

edit: i’ve seen some people disagree with me on the comphet part for mabel, in hindsight my wording was way more definitive than i was meaning. check the replies for more on her :)

#gravity falls #gravity falls headcanons #mabel pines #dipper pines #trans dipper pines #stanley pines #stan pines #grunkle stan #stan likes men he married that statue in vegas #stanford pines #ford pines #aroace ford #fiddleford mcgucket #whether it was reciprocated or not fiddleford was in love with ford next question #bill cipher #wendy corduroy #soos ramirez

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blueskrugs · 8 months ago

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I Love You (It's Ruining My Life) | Nick Blankenburg

this is a christmas fic. in july. for demi @wyattjohnston's birthday. which was in june. does the earliness of one make up for the lateness of the other? uh. happy birthday/happy holidays, I guess? fear of commitment / secret admirer / stranded / high school sweethearts / exes to lovers length: 6.4k words

Nick Blankenburg is the boy Olivia will never get over.

There’s a framed photo in her mother’s living room from seven years ago of Nick and Olivia at senior prom. Nick’s tie and boutonniere matched Olivia’s red Sherri Hill dress and corsage. In her heels, she was a couple of inches taller than him. Olivia sees it, sees them nestled in between the rest of their family photos, every time she’s home. She loved that photo; Nick is smiling softly at her, hand on her hip as she laughs at something one of her friends was doing off-camera. There’s a blooper of that photo, of Nick making faces to keep Olivia laughing, because “her smile is better that way.” That was her phone lock screen for months after that day.

Sometimes she wishes she could hide that picture frame now, or throw it into the fireplace and watch it burn.

But that would be dramatic.

Dramatic like Nick breaking up with her two months after high school graduation, saying he needed time to “figure some things out.” Dramatic like Nick hardly talking to her for weeks before he dumped her, after they’d been dating for three years.

Olivia had cried for weeks. Nick had been her first boyfriend, her first love. Washington was a small town, and almost everyone Olivia knew had married their high school sweetheart and settled down. She’d thought that would be her and Nick, too, until Nick decided to set his sights on bigger things.

Olivia pretended to get over it and moved to Ann Arbor in the fall. Nick seemed like he was always over it, and he moved to Detroit to join Victory Honda.

Olivia threw everything she had into school. She joined a sorority, joined clubs, started coaching a local girls’ soccer team. She was doing well.

By the time she was in her third year and one of her sorority sisters was telling her about the cute overage freshman named Nick who had joined the Michigan hockey team, Olivia is doing her best impersonation of a girl who finally got over her high school boyfriend.

It doesn’t stop her from dropping her phone on her face when her friend Paige leans over from her perch on the end of Olivia’s bed to show her the newest member of the hockey team. Nick Blankenburg’s smiling face stares back at Olivia from Paige’s phone screen.

“It says he’s from Washington, d’you know him?” Paige asks, oblivious. She’s already resumed scrolling.

“Yeah, uh,” Olivia says. “I think we went to high school together.”

“Oh, cool,” Paige says, continuing her blithe scrolling again.

Olivia thinks that’s the end of it. Hopes it’s the end of it. She doesn’t frequent hockey games these days, and since Nick spent two years in juniors instead of heading straight to Michigan, it’s unlikely they’ll be crossing paths on campus any time soon.

Then the football game against Ohio State rolls around. Olivia’s boyfriend Austin had traveled from Ohio to Michigan for Thanksgiving with Olivia’s family, and he stuck around through the weekend to go to the game at The Big House. Austin sticks out like a sore thumb, decked in all red, in a sea of maize and blue, but he good naturedly kisses Olivia at kickoff, ignoring the jeers of the crowd around them.

Michigan loses. It’s a bit of a blowout.

Someone from the next section over shouts something at Austin. He turns to shout back, tightening his arm around Olivia’s waist as they try to make their way out of the stadium with the rest of the crowd. Olivia’s not sure who starts it, but someone starts shoving. Olivia gets caught in the middle of it, jostled to the side as a fight starts. There’s more yelling. Someone pushes Olivia from behind, then from the side, and she falls.

Or, starts to fall, until someone catches her. It’s oddly reminiscent of the time Olivia met Austin, at another Ohio State versus Michigan football game her freshman year, and someone had bumped into him, causing him to spill a soda on Olivia.

She looks up into the face of the hands that caught her. “Nick?” she blurts. Nick’s grip on her elbows gets tighter, before he realizes he’s squeezing and lets go. He helps Olivia to her feet again. The crush of the crowd shoves them together, and Nick’s hands slide to Olivia’s hips to steady her. She’s still staring at him in awe, as if she’s never seen him before.

Nick still hasn’t said anything. Through the crowd, someone takes Olivia’s hand. Austin. She turns to find him, following as he tugs her away from Nick.

“Who was that?” Austin asks, leaning in close to speak in Olivia’s ear. Olivia cranes her neck around, but Nick’s lost to the crowd again.

“No one,” Olivia says. “It was no one.” She’s not sure if she’s trying to convince herself or Austin.

It seems impossible to continue to avoid Nick around Ann Arbor after that. Michigan’s campus has never felt so small. She sees him in the library, studying intently with his headphones on. She sees him walking across campus, always with a few other rowdy hockey players. She sees him waiting in line for coffee at Sweetwaters in the student union. Nick tries to talk to her, once.

They were crossing paths on campus, and Nick reached out a hand. He was alone, for once.

“Liv, hey,” he’d started. Olivia takes a second to look at him properly for the first time. He’s grown up a little since they left high school, but he still looks like the same sweet Nick she used to know. She pulls her arm away from him.

“I’m late for a class, sorry,” she said. She was heading in the opposite direction of the Education building, and she thought Nick might know that. She walked away before Nick could get another word in. He never tried to talk to her again after that. They share smiles every once in a while; Olivia’s always feel fake.

The years pass. Olivia graduates, gets a job as a fourth grade teacher in Detroit. Austin moves in with her. She finally stops thinking about Nick.

When Nick signs with the Columbus Blue Jackets, Paige takes the liberty of forwarding every single Instagram post about him to Olivia. Olivia FaceTimes Paige just so she can flip her off. Paige spends the next year and a half making it her personal responsibility to keep Olivia updated on her ex-boyfriend—every injury, every goal, every time he’s sent back down to the AHL.

Olivia tries not to pay any attention to it. Keyword: tries.

Austin and Olivia drive back down to Ohio a few days before Christmas to visit his family in Columbus. Olivia very carefully doesn’t mention that Nick had been called up a few weeks back the entire drive. It had caused a fight, once, when she mindlessly dropped into a conversation about the Blue Jackets that she knew Nick. She’s never talked about him around Austin again.

Later that night, when Olivia is standing on the curb outside of Austin’s parents’, her bag by her feet, tears drying on her cheeks in the freezing air, she’s briefly grateful for Paige’s incessant updates on Nick. At least she knows that the only person she knows in this awful city isn’t actually two hours away in Cleveland. She pulls out her phone with shaky hands.

God, she hopes Nick hasn’t changed his phone number.

The phone rings for so long that Olivia thinks Nick won’t answer. She swears under her breath and starts to pull her phone away from her ear to call an Uber instead when she hears a muffled, “Hello?” on the other end of the line. It sounds like she woke him.

“Nick?” Olivia asks. A car drives by, kicking up dirty slush, and Olivia flinches. There’s a moment of silence. “You know what, never mind, I’ll just—” Olivia goes to hang up the phone again, but Nick cuts her off.

“Liv? Hang on, what’s wrong?” There’s shuffling on Nick’s end of the call. He sounds wide awake now. “Where are you, are you in trouble?”

“Can you come pick me up?” Olivia whispers.

“Text me your address, I’ll be right there.” Nick hangs up.

Olivia’s numb by the time a car pulls up to the curb in front of her. A familiar figure jumps out of the driver’s seat and runs around the front of the car to pull Olivia into a tight hug. Olivia lets herself hug Nick back for a brief second, before he’s pulling away again and reaching for her suitcase.

“Liv, it’s freezing, what the hell are you doing standing out here?” he asks. He ushers her to the passenger seat and throws her suitcase in the back of the car. The heat’s blasting, and Olivia thinks Nick turned on the seat warmer for her. Her teeth are chattering.

Nick pulls away from the curb. Olivia settles back and lets the suburbs of Columbus turn into a blur outside the windows. Nick allows her to wallow in silence for a few minutes before he turns to Olivia at a red light.

“You didn’t tell me what happened, or why you needed me to pick you up in the middle of the night from the fucking Columbus suburbs,” Nick says. He doesn’t sound angry, just worried. Washed in the red glow of the stoplight, Olivia can see the way his eyebrows crease.

“Never gave me a chance,” Olivia manages. Nick shoots her an unimpressed look, but the light turns green again, saving Olivia from Nick’s gaze.

Nick’s CarPlay is softly playing Taylor Swift on shuffle. Olivia lets it cycle through a few songs before she speaks again.

“Austin and I broke up,” Olivia says.

Nick, to his credit, doesn’t ask who Austin is. Olivia’s pretty sure he never unfollowed her on Instagram. He’s probably seen all of her sappy posts from the last six years.

Nick just clicks his tongue and says, “Sorry, Liv, that’s shitty.”

Neither of them say anything else for the rest of the drive to Nick’s apartment. Olivia gawks out the window as they approach what is, apparently, Nick’s building.

“What?” Nick asks, pulling carefully into a spot in the parking garage.

“Nick, this is bougie as hell.” Olivia has never felt so far from Washington, Michigan in her life.

Nick shrugs as he puts his car in park and climbs out. He pulls Olivia’s suitcase out before opening her door for her. “It’s not that fancy.”

Olivia smacks him on the chest. She’s struck, suddenly, at how solid Nick’s become now that they’ve grown up. Now that they don’t know each other. The reminder of how different they are, how far they’ve come since high school, shocks Olivia into silence as she follows Nick up the elevator and to his apartment door.

He shoots her another worried look over his shoulder as he unlocks the door. “Are you sure you’re okay? Are you still cold?” He pulls Olivia by the wrist across the threshold and over to his couch. He turns on the gas fireplace, which Olivia raises her eyebrows at.

“Not that fancy,” she murmurs. Nick’s still bustling around, turning his heat up, disappearing into his bedroom and re-emerging with an armful of blankets, dressed in sweats and a ratty Michigan T-shirt. He throws a blanket at Olivia’s face. She rips it off, sputtering, before she realizes what it is. “You still have this?” she asks, incredulous.

The blanket in question is a T-shirt blanket, emblazoned all over with Romeo High School—dozens of Nick’s high school T-shirts, cut up and quilted together by Olivia’s mom after they had graduated. Olivia has a matching one, laid across the foot of her bed back in Detroit.

Nick looks sheepish for the first time since he picked up Olivia. “My mom, uh, helped me move in here, and she wanted to make sure I was never cold, I guess.”

The blanket looks worn, like it’s been used and washed dozens of times since they were eighteen. Olivia doesn’t call Nick out on it.

Nick settles on his couch next to Olivia. “I’m, uh, driving home first thing in the morning if you want to come with,” he says awkwardly.

Olivia chuckles wryly. “Not like I’ve got anywhere else to go,” she says. Her mother is going to be so shocked when Olivia shows up on the doorstep in the morning. Olivia was supposed to come back from Ohio with a ring on her finger, not lugging back a broken heart.

“Oh. Right,” Nick says. They lapse into stiff silence, until Nick yawns.

“You don’t have to stay up on my behalf,” Olivia says.

Nick looks over at her. “Nah, I’m fine.”

He pulls out his phone, so Olivia does the same, content to scroll in silence for a while. Until Nick starts laughing quietly at something on his phone. Olivia stretches out and pokes him in the thigh with her toes.

“What’s so funny?”

Nick locks his phone sheepishly. “Nothing.” When Olivia raises her eyebrows at him, he relents. “Kent keeps sending me these tweets about me, they’re kinda funny, I guess.”

Olivia feels her heart skip a beat, but she tries to mask it. She nudges Nick with her foot again. “Tweets about you? I need to see these.”

Nick blushes and tries to hold his phone farther out of Olivia’s reach. Her eyes narrow. That’s as good as a challenge, in her mind. Before she can think better of it, Olivia lunges across the couch for Nick’s phone. Nick jerks back, laughing, but Olivia manages to grab ahold of his wrist.

“Liv,” Nick says, but then they’re wrestling for the phone. Nick’s still laughing. Olivia’s struck, again, at how much bigger Nick is than when they were still in high school. In the scuffle, Olivia ends up halfway in Nick’s lap, but she’s also successfully clutching Nick’s phone in her hand.

Olivia says a quick prayer that Nick is too sentimental to change his phone passcode. (It’s his mom’s birthday.) Nick half-heartedly swipes at the phone as it clicks unlocked.

God bless Karin Blankenburg.

“Liv, c’mon, you don’t—”

Olivia isn’t sure what the next words out of Nick’s mouth are going to be, because she cuts him off by bursting into laughter. She’s swiping quickly through the photo gallery in Nick’s message thread with Kent Johnson. Tweet screenshot, tweet screenshot, random golf photo, another tweet screenshot. They’re mostly innocuous, or vaguely thirsty, or rants about how Nick is underrated by the Blue Jackets organization and how he should get more playing time.

“Liv, what’s so funny?” Nick complains. He sounds put-out, and Olivia glances up from his phone to look at his face. He’s blushing again.

“Nick, like half of these tweets are mine.” From an anonymous Twitter account no one in her life knows about. Nick gapes at her. “I thought I had it locked down, but I guess some have slipped through.” She should check to make sure that account is still private, actually. Nick gapes at her. “What?” Olivia asks. Satisfied, she locks Nick’s phone and hands it back.

“I didn’t know you still paid any attention to me,” Nick says. Olivia hasn’t moved from her position in Nick’s lap.

“A lot of it has been against my will,” Olivia admits. A lot of her tweets were posted under the influence, as well. Nick raises an eyebrow in question. “My friend, Paige, has made it her personal mission to give me a play-by-play of your entire career. Guess I was more invested than I thought.”

Nick’s gaping at Olivia again. She wishes he wouldn’t look at her like that. She shifts uncomfortably back to her end of the couch.

Nick doesn’t say anything.

“Hey, uh, do you mind if I use your shower?” Olivia asks, trying desperately to break the awkward silence she has created. “I’m still a little cold.” In truth, she’s warmed up a bit, but she doesn’t think she could bear to sit in the same room as Nick for another moment.

Nick seems to shake himself. “Oh, yeah, of course.” He points towards his bedroom. “The, uh, bathroom’s through there. There should be a couple extra clean towels and stuff in the closet. Use whatever.”

As Olivia stands to root through her luggage for a change of clothes and her toiletry bag, Nick does the same but slips into the kitchen. Olivia feels a tightness in her chest she didn’t realize was there ease. She sighs.

When Olivia emerges from the shower twenty minutes later, smelling of Nick’s soap and only feeling marginally more like herself, Nick’s still hiding in the kitchen. He’s eating Christmas cookies, and he looks sheepish when he sees Olivia, like he’s a little kid caught sneaking into the cookie jar.

“Are those your mom’s cookies?” Olivia asks. Karin’s Christmas cookies were practically legendary back home in Washington. Olivia has missed them every year since Nick broke up with her.

Nick smiles. “Yeah, she sent me some a few days ago.” Olivia doesn’t bother pointing out that he’ll be home the next day. He holds the Tupperware out to Olivia. “D’you want one?”

“Is that even a question?” Olivia says, snatching the Tupperware. She slides onto the stool next to Nick at the counter, digging for a gingerbread cookie. Nick’s knee nudges hers. “These are the best cookies I’ve ever had. I thought I would die without ever having them again.”

Nick chuckles and gently slides the Tupperware away from Olivia. “That’s a little dramatic.” At Olivia’s skeptical look, he continues, “My mom loves you. She would make you cookies if you asked.”

Olivia takes another bite of her cookie instead of responding. Olivia’s on her fourth cookie when Nick yawns.

“Dude, go to bed,” Olivia tells him. Nick opens his mouth to protest again. “You’re the one driving back to Michigan tomorrow, and I’m obviously keeping you up. Go to bed.”

Nick rolls his eyes but gives in. “Fine, I’ll see you in the morning.”

The door to his bedroom is shut before Olivia can figure out what happened.

Later, Olivia’s most of the way to sleep when Nick’s door creaks open again. Olivia hears Nick’s quiet footsteps as he creeps over to the couch Olivia’s laying on. She cracks her eyes open.

“Sorry,” Nick whispers. “I just wanted an extra blanket.”

There’s four blankets Olivia isn’t using piled at the end of the couch. Nick carefully pulls one off. In the dim light, Olivia watches as he wraps it around his shoulders like a cape. She shuts her eyes again as Nick’s footsteps recede.

“Liv?” Nick whispers. Olivia can barely hear him.

“What, Nick?”

“I thought you hated me,” he says.

“I could never hate you,” Olivia murmurs sleepily. She’s asleep before Nick's door even shuts again.

The next morning, Nick’s up early. Olivia groans and rolls over, burying her face in one of Nick’s throw pillows. She rolls back over when the scent of fresh eggs and toast reaches her nose.

“You made breakfast?” she asks.

“Yeah,” Nick replies, the duh implied. “Come over here, and eat while it’s still hot.”

Olivia reluctantly drags herself off the couch and takes her place at the counter next to Nick. Nick’s knee bumps hers again as he slides a plate towards her.

“No coffee?” Olivia jokes.

“We can stop for Starbucks before we hit the road.”

For some reason, Olivia wasn’t expecting that answer. She can’t come up with a witty response, so she eats her breakfast in silence.

Nick clears both of their plates when they’ve finished, starts the dishwasher, wipes nonexistent crumbs off the countertop. Olivia looks around Nick’s apartment. It’s pretty much spotless, except for the nest of blankets Olivia left on the couch. Nick’s bags are packed and stacked next to Olivia’s by the front door. The apartment’s nice, but it doesn’t feel lived in. Olivia guesses it really isn’t much, since Nick’s been grinding down in Cleveland most of the season.

“Ready?” Nick asks, jolting Olivia out of her thoughts.

“Yeah, sure, just lemme—” grab my bags, is what she was going to say, but Nick’s already hefting his duffel bag over his shoulder and grabbing the handle of Olivia’s suitcase. “Uh, yeah, let’s go.”

Nick leads the way back down to his car. Olivia watches as he tosses their bags in the trunk, then steps over to the passenger door to open it for Olivia. When he slides into the driver’s seat, he tosses his phone to Olivia.

“Order yourself some Starbucks,” he says. “My order’s marked as a favorite, add that in, too.”

Olivia sticks her tongue out at Nick as she unlocks his phone. “Like I would not order you something.”

She taps in her order while Nick drives to the nearest Starbucks. He makes a face when he hands Olivia her drink.

“How do you even drink that? Is there any coffee in there? Also, it’s iced, and it’s December.” Nick takes an appalled drink of his own hot coffee as Olivia sips her own very light, very sweet, and very iced coffee.

“Maybe you’re the one with shitty taste in coffee,” Olivia retorts, zero heat behind her words. When they were still in high school, neither of them drank coffee. Just another thing about Nick that changed without Olivia knowing.

Coffees in hand, they finally get on the road towards Michigan for real. Olivia had slept poorly on Nick’s couch, so she’s looking forward to dozing for a little while. Except, Nick chatters nervously for the first forty-five minutes of the drive. He even drowns out the Christmas playlist (her own) that Olivia cued up on his CarPlay.

Olivia fights off a yawn. “Nick, you can just ask.”

Nick cuts himself off mid-sentence. “I don’t know what you mean.” Olivia gives him a flat look. Nick blushes and stares out the windshield instead of glancing over again. He sighs. “Why’d you and what’s-his-face break up?”

“Austin,” Olivia replies automatically. She notices Nick shake his head at her. She hesitates. “I thought he was going to propose this week,” she admits.

There’s a pause. “I don’t get it.”

“Austin told me that if I wanted a ring, I’d have to move to Ohio,” Olivia says.

“What?” Nick asks. His immediate outrage is a little funny. “Liv, I’m sorry, that’s so shitty.”

Olivia shrugs. “There was a fight about me wanting to stay in Michigan when I graduated a few years ago,” she says. “He never wanted to live in Detroit. I guess I sorta always knew this would happen, and I was just delaying the inevitable.”

Nick clicks his tongue at her. “You love Michigan. Even in high school, you always talked about how you never wanted to leave.”

Olivia can’t believe Nick remembers those conversations they had about the future. “I can’t believe you remember that,” she says.

Nick looks away from the highway for a moment to give Olivia a disbelieving look. “Why wouldn’t I remember that?” he asks.

Olivia doesn’t have a good response to that.

They’re both quiet for another few miles.

“My turn,” Olivia asks, over the sound of The Carpenters playing on the car’s speakers. Nick makes a face, but doesn’t protest. “Why’d you break up with me?”

The question had been plaguing Olivia for years. She had thought she’d finally outrun it, but it followed her all the way to Nick’s car, all the way down I-75 towards Michigan. Maybe if she could get Nick to answer her now, she could finally truly move on. As soon as she could get out of this fucking car, that is.

Nick sighs. “Liv, that’s not fair.”

“How is that ‘not fair’?” Olivia snaps. “You got to ask me a question, now I’m asking you.”

“Because I never liked that asshole you were dating, and I wanted to know what he did to break your heart.”

“You never even met Austin!” Olivia says.

“I didn’t need to,” Nick says. His knuckles are white on the steering wheel. “He got in that fight at the football game, and let you get pushed around.” “Nick, oh my god,” Olivia laughs. “It was a game against Ohio, all kinds of shit gets started at them.”

“He never should have let you fall,” Nick argues.

“Dude, that was like four years ago, how are you still upset about this?”

“He never deserved you,” Nick says.

“You never even met him!” Olivia says again. “And why do you even care so much? You dumped me after graduation.” Nick winces. “Why’d you break up with me, Nick?” she asks again.

“I didn’t want to hold you back,” Nick says,

“Hold me back? From what?” Olivia asks, but Nick talks over her.

“You were going off to Ann Arbor, I wasn’t even going to college.”

Olivia scoffs. “Nick, you moved to Detroit. That’s, like, 45 minutes from Ann Arbor.” Nick shakes his head. “And you ended up at Michigan a few years later, anyway. And you’re literally in the NHL now!”

Nick sighs again. “You’re not getting it, Liv. I worked my ass off to get where I am. I walked on to the team at Michigan. I never should have made it all the way to the NHL, but people took chances on me. I didn’t want you waiting around on some kid who wasn’t even good enough to get a second look from anyone for years. Would you have really wanted to be a senior, dating some stupid sophomore?”

“I don’t know! You never gave me the chance to decide that for myself. I never cared about the hockey, Nick. I just really loved you,” Olivia says quietly. “Wait, we’re literally the same age. Just because you were a sophomore by credits doesn’t somehow make you two years younger than me.” “That’s what you focused on?” Nick asks, but he’s laughing. His face becomes serious again. “I wasn’t ready to start thinking about the future. I was just trying to hold onto hockey for as long as I could back then. I knew everyone expected us to settle down like everyone else in town does, but I couldn’t do that.”

“I did think we would get married one day,” Olivia admits.

“See!” Nick says. “I felt like everyone had this idea, this plan for us, but I wanted to make my own plans. I don’t know, I guess I got scared of the idea of my future being written by someone who wasn’t me.”

Olivia looks out the window, at the dirty snow along the highway. She thinks she gets it. She had this idea of what a perfect life with Nick would have looked like, and when she didn’t get it, she tried to mold Austin into all the gaps in her life that Nick had left behind.

“We were just kids, Nick,” she says softly.

Nick chuckles wryly. “And when have you ever known kids to be good at talking about big things?” he asks.

Olivia has lost track of how long they’ve been driving. She’s not even really sure how far of a drive it is back to home, but Nick seems to know the way. His GPS isn’t even on. They lapse into silence for the duration of another song, then two.

Finally, Nick breaks the silence. “So, now what?”

Olivia huffs out a laugh and scrubs at her face. “Cry. Delete the Pinterest board I had for wedding planning.”

Nick shoots her a sideways look. “People actually do that?”

Olivia laughs again. This time it’s more real. “Dude, I’ve been working on this board since we were in high school.”

Nick doesn’t respond to that, though his cheeks look a little pink. Olivia wonders if she went too far. Nick had just admitted he had been scared off by everyone basically planning their wedding when they were eighteen. She’s about to open her mouth to apologize, to take it back somehow, when Nick speaks again instead.

“We’ve still got a ways ahead of us, I can shut up so you can get some rest if you want.”

Although Olivia had been planning on napping in the car when this little road trip started, Nick’s sentence makes her sit up straighter.

“Nicholas, why would I want you to shut up?”

“I don’t know how you don’t hate me, Liv.”

Olivia could smack him. “Would you stop that? I don’t think it’s possible for anyone to hate you, dumbass.”

“But I broke your heart—”

“When we were eighteen! I was never angry at you, Nick, just confused, really.”

Nick falls silent. He’s quiet for long enough that Olivia does start to doze off.

“I missed you more than I hated you,” she whispers before she falls asleep.

It takes Olivia a moment to reorient herself when she wakes up again. The car has stopped. Nick’s still sitting beside her in the driver’s seat, Christmas playlist still playing over the car’s speakers. Olivia looks blearily out the passenger window.

“This isn’t my house, Nick,” she says warily.

Nick gives her a sheepish look as he pushes open his car door, at the same time the Blankenburgs’ front door opens, and Karin appears.

“My mom wanted to see you,” he says.

Olivia huffs and pushes her car door open, too. Karin is still standing on the front porch. Nick makes his way up the stairs, but his mom is focused on Olivia as she trails after him.

She reaches to pull Olivia into a hug. “Oh, Livvy, it’s so good to see you.”

Olivia stiffens, but hugs Karin back after a moment. “You too, Mrs. B.” She probably hasn’t seen Nick’s mom since before they broke up. “Merry Christmas.”

“Olivia, you know you can call me Karin.”

Olivia is physically incapable of that, actually, but she grins at Karin, anyway.

Nick reappears on the front porch. Olivia hadn’t realized he’d stepped inside, but the door wafts all kinds of delicious smells from inside the Blankenburgs’ house as it swings shut. Olivia’s stomach grumbles. They must have driven through lunch.

“Okay, Mom, you got to say hi,” Nick says, stepping to Olivia’s side. “We should let Liv go, I’m sure she wants to see her own family.”

“Oh, they’re already all inside! So are your brother and sister, we’ve just been waiting on you two!”

“What?” Nick and Olivia ask in unison. They share a bewildered look.

“Well, when you told me you were bringing Livvy home, I just invited her family over for brunch.” Nick and Olivia must still look confused, because she continues, “You know I always make too much food. And right now it’s all getting cold, so c’mon!”

Karin leaves Nick and Olivia on the porch.

Olivia looks sideways at Nick. “D’you think she made cinnamon rolls?” Olivia used to love it when she was allowed to sleep over on Saturday nights (in Katrina’s old room, while Nick slept in his own) and Karin made them fresh cinnamon rolls Sunday morning.

Nick rolls his eyes, but he grins at Olivia. “All you care about is my mother’s cooking, huh?”

He pulls open the door for Olivia, still grinning. Olivia elbows him as she slips through the front door. She follows the smell of food and sound of laughter down the hall to the Blankenburgs’ formal dining room, Nick trailing after her. Every inch of the house is decked out in Karin’s Christmas decorations, and the dining room is no exception. The only thing Olivia is really focused on, though, is the table, piled high with food, and the two empty chairs at one end that are clearly meant for Nick and Olivia. They share another look, but everyone is waiting for them, so they take their seats.

Brunch is great, if a little awkward. Nick’s brother and his girlfriend are home, so are Katrina and her husband. It’s nice to catch up with them, in between Karin grilling Olivia on her life over the last seven years. Karin’s cooking is as good as Olivia remembers it. She eats two cinnamon rolls.

Olivia is in the middle of cuddling Katrina’s little boy when Karin says, “Oh, Livvy, it was such a surprise when Nick told me he was bringing you home. I can’t believe he didn’t tell me you two got back together!”

Nick and Olivia say, “Oh, we’re not—” at the same time Olivia’s mom says, “No, Olivia’s been with Austin, oh, what, six years now?”

An awkward silence falls over the table. Olivia realizes she probably should have told her mom the real reason she was coming home early from Ohio. Nick clears his throat as Olivia pushes her chair back from the table. She hands Katrina her squirming toddler back.

“Mom,” Nick starts, but Olivia cuts him off.

“You know, Mrs. B, thank you so much for having us all over, but I’m pretty tired. Nick’s couch isn’t the most comfortable to sleep on.”

Nick shoves his chair back, too. “I’ll take you back home, Liv. I’ve still got your bags in my car, anyway.”

Karin stands, too. The dining room suddenly feels too small. She gently takes Olivia by the elbow. “Here, Livvy, let me pack up some leftovers for you.” Olivia follows her to the kitchen.

She overhears Katrina hiss, “You made her sleep on the couch?” as they head into the kitchen. Olivia waits obediently while Karin plies her with Tupperwares of leftovers and Christmas cookies.

“It really was nice to see you, Livvy,” Karin whispers. “You know you’re always welcome here, remember.” She looks like she wants to say something else, or maybe hug Olivia, but Olivia’s too busy trying not to drop anything.

“Thanks, Mrs. B,” Olivia whispers back.

Arms full of food, Olivia bypasses the still-awkwardly silent dining room and sneaks down the hallway to where Nick is waiting for her by the front door. He looks upset, still, but his face relaxes when he sees Olivia.

“Geez, did my mom give you enough leftovers?” he asks. He takes a few of the Tupperware containers off the top of the stack. When Olivia doesn’t crack a smile at his teasing, his face morphs back into something like concern. “Liv, you okay?” he asks.

Olivia forces a smile. “Yeah, just ready to go home.”

It starts to snow again on the way back to Olivia’s childhood home. Nick doesn’t need a GPS to get there. He pulls into the driveway and puts his car in park. Neither of them make any move to get out of the car. Nick turns the radio off and turns to face Olivia.

“Liv, you okay?” Nicks asks again.

For the first time since she stood on the freezing curb the night before, Olivia starts to cry.

“No, I don’t know—” She takes a shaky breath. “When we were together, I used to think I had my whole life figured out, then we broke up, and I was so lost. I started dating Austin, and I could finally see a plan for the future again, and I clung to that idea of a perfect happily ever after with him for so long, but it was all just a lie, and now I’m 26 and single again—”

“Hold on,” Nick interrupts, “26 is not that old, Liv, oh my God.” He sounds like he’s about to laugh, which makes Olivia giggle, too.

“I thought I was going to be married to you by now!” she protests.

To her surprise, Nick doesn’t shut down. Instead, he laughs for real. “Liv, if you’d married me, you’d still end up living in Ohio, babe.”

Olivia makes a face. Nick laughs harder. “Okay, but, like—” She doesn’t have a good ending to that sentence. In a desperate attempt to avoid Nick’s knowing gaze, she flings open the passenger door and dashes up the front steps to the door.

She distantly hears Nick swear and throw his car door open as well. He runs up the stairs after her, putting himself between Olivia and the door.

“But what, Liv?” he asks, breathless.

“Nick, I don’t know.” She does know. “I think a part of me always knew Austin wasn’t the right person. I guess, maybe, Ohio wouldn’t be too bad with the right person.”

It’s freezing outside. Nick’s warm breath fans across Olivia’s chilled cheeks.

“And who’s the right person, Liv?” Olivia doesn’t answer, refuses to meet Nick’s eyes. Nick huffs. He captures Olivia’s chin gently between his finger and thumb and tilts her chin up until she has no choice but to look him in the face. “How ‘bout this: do you think we could try again, Olivia?” he asks.

Olivia swallows hard. “I don’t know, Nick—”

Olivia thinks about desperately calling Nick the night before when she needed help. Thinks about the blanket her mom made him years ago still laying on his bed every night. Thinks about brunch at the Blankenburgs’, the inexplicable feeling of home, there with her family and Nick’s.

Thinks about Nick, standing in front of her now.

“They say long-distance can be pretty hard, Blankenburg,” Olivia says.

Nick scoffs, eyes warm. “Who cares what they say?” Nick’s leaning in now. “Please tell me I can kiss you.”

Olivia laughs and winds her arms around Nick’s neck. “I guess I’ll allow it,” she teases.

“Fuck’s sake,” Nick says under his breath. “You guess.” Then he’s kissing Olivia, both hands tight on her hips, fierce and sweet at the same time, years of unspoken words passing between them.

Olivia makes herself pull away. Nick pouts at her. “Knowing our parents when they get together, we probably have a few hours until Mom and Dad come home.” Nick grins, already knowing what Olivia’s going to say next. “Would you like to come inside?”

Nick kisses Olivia again, quick, before dashing off the front porch to his car. Olivia watches as he hurriedly pulls her bags out of the trunk.

“Liv, I thought you’d never ask.”

Olivia watches, a smile on her face, as Nick excitedly makes his way back to her. Long-distance may be hard, but with Nick, Olivia thinks it’ll be worth it. Besides, everyone always says that “home is where the heart is,” right? Olivia thinks home is wherever Nick Blankenburg is. And maybe one day, he’ll sign a contract with Detroit, and they’ll both get to come back home to Michigan.

#cait writes things #nick blankenburg fic #nick blankenburg imagine #columbus blue jackets fic #columbus blue jackets imagine #nhl fic #nhl imagine #nhl fanfiction #hockey fic #hockey imagine #hockey fanfiction

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bloodyinkandquill · 4 months ago

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Valk x Reader

alright got permission from the requester to just do general hcs, i woke up 4-5 hours before my alarm because we’re having a late start day due to the snow, don’t feel as shitty mentally but i’m still not doing great, reasonably

- You weren’t entirely sure how you ended up dating one of the Inpherno’s most famous idols, who is also a demi deity and technically a prince, but hey you aren’t complaining

- Valk is an incredibly sweet partner and an overall very loving guy, he always lets you know just how much he loves and adores you, wether through actions or words, he can be super cheesy about it but it’s incredibly sincere and loving, so even if you roll your eyes at how sappy he’s being you love the way he treats you

- He is an incredibly touchy guy, he is constantly touching you, holding your hand, giving you hugs and kisses, cuddling, bumping horns with you, just any way for him to touch you really, since he’s very likely shorter then you he’s usually little spoon or he just lays on top of you, he’s surprisingly light honestly, unlike Dom he loves when you touch his wings, they’re small and sensitive but it’s an intimate and trusting thing for him to let you touch them, so if while you’re cuddling you pet his wings he literally melts

- He sends you those cheesy videos of two cats doing something loving or even just sitting next to each other that have the caption ‘us<3’, he sends you so many of those it’s not even funny at this point, if one of the cats is an orange cat he always calls being that one, he is very orange cat coded

- He uses those embarrassing over the top pet names for you, you groan and light heartedly swat at him but he just laughs and keeps calling you them, if you retaliate you end up in a war of who can call each other the more embarrassing couples pet name, Dom just looks exhausted by it

- Speaking of Dom you obviously get to know him more, you can tell the differences of the brother’s personalities a lot clearer, but you also see their real personalities not their stage ones, he’s totally chill with you since you make his brother happy but you did get some serious shovel talk when your partner first introduced you to his brother

- Valk unsurprisingly loves karaoke, it’s probably his favorite date night activity, he doesn’t mind if you can’t sing you’re doing the thing he loves, and besides half the fun of karaoke is sucking absolute balls at it, if anything he’s the one ruining the fun being a professional trained singer, but it’s nice to have a private room where you let loose, maybe have a drink, eat some like ice cream parfaits and sing out music like maniacs

- Other dates you two usually do are nice fancy dinners, or nights in gaming, he can and will kick your ass at whatever the equivalent of Mario Kart is, maybe also going to an arcade together, unfortunately most of your dates are in their home or yours because he gets recognized in public, he can to some extent to undercover and make himself less recognizable but it only works so well, you promise him you don’t mind you knew what you were signing up for by dating him

- His love language is yes. He basically falls into all of them, he may slightly prefer some over the others but for the most part he shows and feels loved by all of them, so whatever yours is he’s absolutely fine with, he feels loved regardless and can love you regardless

- His work hours are so inconsistent it’s crazy, sometimes you have two weeks of him barely doing anything other days he and Don have to go into the studio at 5 am, but between it all he reminds you just how much he loves and treasures you, sending you long winded texts about how much he adores you, any and everything about you

- If you’re insecure about anything about yourself he’s saying the most loving and sweet things about it till you want to cry over how amazing he’s being towards you, you feel inferior sometimes seeing as you’re dating him who has so many fans and people who’d kill to date him, but he just reminds you how much he loves you and that there’s no one else in the entire Inphinity he’d rather be with

- Meeting his grandpa was stressful to say the least, not only is he the legal guardian of your lover, he’s a literal god, and your king, so that was not a good time you were incredibly anxious but it went well and eventually it became less scary to see Firebrand

- On the other hand it never became any less scary to see any of his siblings, you see them a lot less so never can really get used to them, the family dinners Firebrand hosts once or twice a year are like a game of mental chess, but Valk is by your side the whole time reassuring you and comforting you, his family isn’t so scary when you get to know them, you disagree but you aren’t saying that

- You call him Mic/Microphone, that’s his name so why wouldn’t you? Valk is just his stage name, you also call Dom by his real name Meg/Megaphone, only a handful of demons have the permission to call the brother’s their real names so it’s nice

i self ship with both flipside brothers so this was a nice break to write, i’m fucking starving right now i’ll probably make myself some breakfast here soon, anyways hope you enjoyed adios

#x reader #phighting x reader #phighting #phighting!#phighting valk x reader #valk x reader phighting #phighting valk #valk phighting #valk x reader

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zenless-zideblog-zero · 5 months ago

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ZZZ sexuality headcanons

Because everyone else seems to do it.

~Phaethon Sibs~

Wise: Biromantic (slight preference for women) Pansexual, but like Theater Kid Bi/Pan. He IS LGBT+, but he's so dramatic about it the only people he ends up falling in love with are those with big dramatic reveals and backstories (Lycaon, Caesar, ETC.)

Belle: Demi on both accounts. She finds herself falling for girls more often but to be fair, an inordinate amount of the people she's around are Girls.

She has some Trans Vibes™ to me, but also just as likely to be cis.

~The Cunning Hares~

Nicole: Likes Women, and Certain men. Aromantic, but willing to be in a romantic relationship.

Anby: Sex positive Asexual, Panromantic. She only recently figured this out since she escaped her mysterious past.

Billy: Okay, him being a Robot, even a sapient one, makes the whole Sexuality/Romanticism thing weird to consider, but given the fact he has some kind of attraction to Monica that seems to be deeper than an emotional infatuation, so like. Straight? But also I reserve the right to change this in the Future.

Nekomata: Okay, as a bisexual it's hard not to make everyone like both men and woman as a form of projection, but also. Shooting her with the Bisexual Beam™.

~Belobog Heavy industries~

Koleda: Pansexual Demiromantic.

Grace & Anton: I am putting these two together because I cannot begin to fathom what is going on inside these People's heads. Should either of them have a sexual and/or romantic partner, they won't care what their partner is, in a way that is impossible to distinguish between Bi/Pan/Omni/Etc and Asexuality.

Simultaneously, I can also see them both being DEEPLY Homosexual, OR in the vein of "HRT Hit me like Freight Train" trans, but not both gay and trans.

Ben: Either the straightest man ever or the least flamboyant gay man in history, because on one hand he's a Bear (Heavyset Hairy Man) and a Bear (Furry) but also he's the accountant, which means he likely was in Business classes in college. I have never met a gay person good at math.

~Victoria Housekeeping~

Lycaon: I think he is like, pan/Omni/etc, but he's so deeply uncomfortable with being open to those he doesn't know he seems like he's demi.

Rina: Again, as a bisexual it's hard not to make everyone like both men and woman as a form of projection. But also, *Bisexuality Beam*

Corin: She really hasn't put much thought into it, but to seem 'normal' her kneejerk reaction to such a question is to claim that she's straight, even though she's still very much figuring herself out.

Sapphic, with unclear feelings towards men.

Ellen: (BisexualProjection.TXT) Sapphic, but Demi with guys, sort of like how Nicole is described.

~Criminal Investigation Special Response Team~

Zhu-Yuan: Comfortably Pan, terribly single.

Qingyi: Same thing with Billy where it's different because she doesn't have "Organic" Impulses, but also she's lesbian.

Jane Doe: She's so deep into the "Flirty Femme Fatale" Persona that she's forgotten what her actual preferences are. When is the flirting real, and when is it a ploy? If it was real would it actually be for this Guy/Girl?

She lands somewhere between Lycaon and Corin's deals in this way. I don't Think it's that clear to her, let alone to anyone else. She just needs to be allowed to be honest with others to be true to herself, and figure it out again.

Seth: Sex-Neutral Ace, Panromantic. He WILL Cuddle you after and he WILL Make you breakfast in the morning.

~Sons of Calydon~

Caesar: Bi, heavily leaning towards men because that's mostly what she can find in her romance stories.

Lucy: (BisexualProjection.TXT) As a revolution against her dad, she went HARD into being a lesbian, but the freedom and kindness provided by the Sons have let her really consider her options. She does like women a LOT, but sometimes ... she wouldn't mind a guy treating her like the princess she wants to be.

BUT TO BE CLEAR. She is a Disaster Lesbian for Caesar specifically. Caesar is basically the pinnacle of Sexual Attraction to which she bases all other potential partners against. She does not realize this and it is part of the reason she fights Caesar so much because of the Weird Feelings™ She gets.

Burnice: Literal Flaming Homosexual. The MOST Lesbian. If the bad word for gay (F**) didn't already have the hitorical context for it's existence, Burnice would be the origin of it.

Piper: Also a lesbian. She had a wife ten years ago, but they've divorced. This cannot be surprising to anyone.

Lighter: GAY GAY HOMOSEXUAL GAY-

~Misc.~

Soukaku: A Child. Do not bother.

Soldier 11: A Good Soldier's only love is for their country, and their only marriage is to the code by which they live!

The amount of Psycho-sexual issues this Woman will have if she ever uncovers her own personhood will be Deep and Troubling. and HOT.

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mothiepixie · 6 months ago

Note

I just realised, if Fae Boysen is 750+ years old and demi falling so hard in love with a person... Does that mean he never had a partner before Mottie? Is he still a virgin?? Because I'm not gonna lie; that be really endearing~

(Though I suppose if he is still a virgin that would make him a trophy to other Fae wanting to claim his virginity)

Being as old as he is, Boysen had a few partners; he experimented and attempted relationships, but they never last long because they grew frustrated and resentment towards his slow love. A lot of them felt neglected because they have more sexual needs than Boysen does.

So he is not a virgin by any means and does go through heats like any other fae. Sometimes when heats become unbearable he may seek a close confidant for relief, but even that is rare. It frustrating for him because he feels it hinders things that must get done.

Even if he was a virgin, no one would know, and if someone did, they would give up long before because it's just that hard to get him to open up.

#mothie talks #fae boysen #boysen

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therollingriceball · 5 months ago

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(demi) Aventurine x (bisexual) Female!Reader // tw on my interpretation of Aventurine's past // kind of character study writing based on my personal sexuality hcs for him

At first, Aventurine never really thought much about falling in love anymore. After everything he went through, it was quite the natural thing to do.

It's not like sex and what came with it repulse him. Sure, it still does whenever he felt like he's not in charge. That reason alone made him avoid doing it with men as much as possible; most of the guys who wanted to do it with him wanted him to be the submissive one and he doesn't like it as much as it brought bad flashbacks.

But he doesn't really know if he's completely straight or not, because putting that aside he does admit he got attracted to men sometimes. Though to be fair, since he's the last of his people, he at least thought to actually fall in love with someone who could have a family with him, and most of the time those kind of people are female. Or born and assigned at female at birth.

By now, he knew people usually had a label dangling with them, whether they're attracted to the 'opposite gender' or the 'same gender'--- a concept that was foreign when he was just a child named Kakavasha. The Avgin's concept of attractions were rather unique for the universe, it seems. It's not like they were conservative as some other faraway planets probably does-- in fact, it was so open that most people doesn't put labels on it. Love just happened in their culture, there's no need for labels.

Why he's mentioning these on his thought, you wonder?

You spent a few times with him, as a 'friend' or so he called, when he realized an unfamiliar feeling. A feeling of warmth were resurrected in his cold, unassuming heart, where he wanted to keep you close as much as possible. He's not even sure it's relevant to the feeling of friendship anymore--- and that's where he noticed it might be more than friendship and curiosity, but love.

It's not like he hadn't had crushes before meeting you. He had a few people that interest him, but he usually put those feelings aside for the sake of his work. He thought if he puts these feelings aside for a while, it'll be gone as much as his other thoughts.

At least, until you mentioned a feminine name as your ex, and he felt heartbroken.

By now, he knew about how people had labels with them well, and the one that fits your attraction might've not been suitable for him.

---

You called him out for avoiding you ever since you mentioned your ex. What you didn't know was that he always did that for things he deemed as unattainable flower. It was something he's much more comfortable to do upon losing a lot of things in his life.

But you had no way of knowing that, and thought he's just not comfortable befriending you anymore because of those labels on you. And to those, he broke his silence.

"There's no way I would hate you just because of that!"

"Then what, Aventurine? I'm starting to lose clues!"

"Because," Aventurine avoided your gaze as much as possible as his face were blushing. "I don't want to trouble you if I fell in love with you. After all--"

"Wait!"

You were dumbfounded, but only for a second. Your face grew red as you realized it was a love confession, and that he had a misunderstanding--- and no, actually you both did. You thought he wouldn't like you that way because of similar reasoning. There are a few rumors going on about him, after all----

"....Idiot. I'm actually bisexual." you sighed out loud as you declared. "And I do love you back."

Turned out, you weren't an unattainable flower, at all.

#aventurine x reader #lempermuter writes #hsr x reader #my headcanons

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sleepyheros · 4 days ago

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... the sleepy verse

. . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋ welcome to the sleepy verse ࿐ྂ

彡 HI & WELCOME .

… i have no earthly idea if this will be pretty or aesthetic but here i am trying. i dont use tumblr all that much but thats okay i'll figure it out as i go .

into the sleepy verse

lives

彡 ABOUT ME .

… blythe - my name is blythe . call me bly if its easier . as of the time im writing this im about to hit my five year mark on shifting . i have been shifting since march 2020 - i found it over a video on TikTok , probably one of the videos we all found shifting over tbh . i have one belief that if shifting found me i was meant to do it . i have 'mini' shifted ( technically just shifted in all reality ) 8 times . i am level 23 in my life - soon i'll be 24 ( dont cheer i often forget im 23 sometimes i still think im five and i need someone to open a fruit cup for me ) …i completely forgot what else i was going to say . neurodivergent . my pronouns are she / they , im a pansexual person .

… uhhh what else should i put here??? most of my drs are probably more niche drs . if they aren't oops it just means i haven't met many people who share those drs with me . i tend to be awkward when it comes to speaking about drs , but i try honestly. i hyperfixate alot and those hyperfixations 100% become my drs 99% of the time . i am also a fur animal mom to 5 animals ( 2 dogs , 3 cats ) . its a fun time. im also a permashifter

… ALSO i love making script templates for people , they're very detailed.

彡 FAVORITES .

… south park . percy Jackson . cooking . Italian food . pasta . food . bearded dragons . any reptile really . the labyrinth . chocolate and strawberry ice cream together . nirvana . classic rock . lady gaga . sage and hunter green . shifting . witchcraft . Hellenism . mythology . painting . music . astronomy . astrology . reading . Nutella and peanut butter sandwiches . spring and fall . video games . dc comics . anime . cartoons . tomato soup . etc .

彡 DRS .

… i have alot of drs , i am only listing the ones that i consider my main ones. also all my drs are like sophomore college age unless stated other wise . also this isn't including my group drs - i have far to many of those .

one . south park ( college au , everyone attends south park community college during sophmore year of college ) two . south park band ( formerly garage band turned bigger . did this instead of college . ) three . fantasy south park ( based off the stick of truth game but set in an actual fantasy world ) four . superhero south park ( based off the fractured but whole game and were actual superheros ) five . better cr ( i have like 3 ) six . percy jackson ( based off the books , i really just wanted to be a demi god ) seven . dc comics ( more so gotham based rather than the whole of dc comics . ) eight . the rookie ( not a cop but john nolan is my dad ) nine . 9-1-1 ten . fantasy

… i have more but alot of them are group drs or honestly just more drs of the same universe.

彡 DNI .

… if you're an anti-shifer , a bully , homophobic , someone who judges others for the simplest things like drs , likes and stuff , sexists , jerks , uh yeah pretty much anyone who fits that little area , dni because i wont tolerate you !

#shiftblr #reality shifting #shifting antis dni #shifting realities #shifting blog #shifting community #shifting motivation #shifting reality #shifters #desired reality #shifting #anti shifters dni #drs #scripting #bly has no idea what else to put here #into the sleepyverse

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shmisky · 10 days ago

Note

whats your headcanon sexualities for the stan twins

Ah, a pretty fun one!

I’m aware that you probably just wanted me to answer with my opinions and not, say, an analysis about it, but then again you sent it to me, and I couldn’t resist yapping about it! So, yes, I shoved some canon tidbits in here too...

I think Stan’s bi, bisexual and biromantic. I don’t think it’s hard for him to actually fall in love because of the completely smitten way he talks about Marilyn, his ex-wife, in his commentary of Land Before Swine.

Uh, sometimes comedy comes from a place of pain and I, y’know, was actually married for less than a day. [...] Reach for the same slot machine handle and it was love at first sight. Marilyn. [...] Man, I was putty in her hands. [...] And I guess her name was fake and her hair was fake, but y’know, the love was real. She really was the one that got away. [...] Sometimes I still think of her. [...] I had love in my life once and uh, y’know, it bit me. And I learnt a bit of a lesson from that which is ya open your heart and blood comes out and ya die. So, y’know, try not to be a sap like I was.

And regarding his attraction to men, well! Even if I weren’t a stancest shipper, we would have this:

And, amusingly, even this (referencing Stan’s marriage to Goldie in Soos and the Real Girl), despite me not taking it seriously:

I’ve seen a gen artist headcanoning him as lithromantic—that is, feeling romantic feelings for someone but not desiring reciprocation, to the point of maybe losing interest if the person reciprocates. That... checks out! A lot! Especially if you consider Stan’s experience with Lady Susan. But since I headcanon him as having reciprocated romantic feelings for Ford as a stancest shipper, I save lithro!Stan for when I’m in a gen mood.

Now, Ford... Why is everything more complicated with Ford? 😭

I headcanon him as demisexual and demiromantic, in both cases bi.

Why demi? Well, first of all, we see that Ford really isn’t in his element when it comes to romance/attraction:

If you didn’t watch J. K. Simmons as Ford reacting to TikTok thirst comments, please do. The entire (hilarious) video is just... the fandom’s horniness over Ford going straight over his head. He somehow manages to interpret all the comments wrongly, until he finally understands their sexual meaning and then promptly gets both horrified and enraged.

This is how Alex sees Ford’s sexuality, from this interview:

Stan shows that he has romantic interests, Mabel shows that she has romantic interests, Dipper shows that he has romantic interests, Ford shows none of that. He has sublimated himself romantically so, so deeply.

I think, for people on all sides of the gender and sexuality equation, the idea of, “I can’t—I’m not sure what this part of myself is, so I’m going to fixate on something I can understand. I am going to become the guiness world record holder on making lego re-creations, of this, and I’m gonna get better at it than anything, and if—as long as I’m doing this, um, then I don’t have to focus on that.”

People speculate about Nikola Tesla’s sexuality, it’s like, there’s a lot of people - some people say—‘cause Tesla was hot, and he was lyrical and poetic and mysterious, and women—they say—were very drawn to Tesla. And Tesla doesn’t talk about women. In Tesla’s autobiography, he talks about how, like, women’s earrings freak him out, and he hears clanging train whistles in his head when he sees an exposed ankle. He was so off in his own plane!

I really thought of Ford kind of like Tesla in that realm. He is distant. So it doesn’t at all surprise me that people found their own experience reflected through Ford in that way.

But it was, you know, when we were doing Gravity Falls, like, gay marriage had only like, just been legalized!

I think all of this heavily hints to Ford being in the ace/aro spectrum.

Now, why bi?

We see subtle hints of Ford being perhaps attracted to men even before the whole drama with Bill, such as his little comment about the Invisible Wizard’s good looks:

But we also see hints of his attraction to women! I was convinced, before, that Ford could only be gay (and demi) and that any and all hints of his attraction to women were comphet. The only “proof” of sorts that I had is:

That “the ladies” became “lies” in the blacklight version, hahah.

But is this enough to stand against the evidence we have of him showing even a certain eagerness to be liked by women?

From the same commentary on Land Before Swine:

[Dipper] gets [his creepiness] from Ford, I think. That and his inability to make eye contact with women. [...] Fordsy had a fear of girls ever since Cathy Crenshaw got freaked out by his hand in third grade. [...] He tried to hold a girl’s hand. She spilled punch on his head and ever since then he had a hard time talking to girls, unlike—unlike myself. That’s life. Anyway, cut to high school, the guy’s never kissed a girl, prom is coming up and he asked me for advice. “Stanley, I know things have been a little weird between you and me with college but can you talk to me about girls?”

That indicates a lack of ability with girls, but not lack of eagerness. And, indeed, Bill mocks him for it in Journal 3, confirming Stan’s tale:

“Little Cathy, what a dream.” The fact Ford possibly considered her to be dreamy hints of Ford having been actually interested in her.

Bill again mocks him (together with Dipper) in TBoB:

And alright, this does sound like very generic cheap mockery, like, “hahah, virgin loser!” But why would Bill go so far as to repeat the joke if he didn’t think Ford wouldn’t at least be a little bit annoyed by it? If he knew Ford was 100% interested in men/male beings, his joke about Ford’s lack of sway with women would have been pathetic. And yes, I know Bill is desperate and pathetic and TBoB, but he usually knows where to hit Ford, as exemplified by him mocking Ford’s hands in front of his Henchmaniacs.

Then of course you have the Soothsquitos’ advices for Ford, including giving the Oracle (Jheselbraum) his phone number:

Even adult researcher Ford is excited about finally getting women to talk to him (and this is also in the blacklight version of Journal 3, which shows that he couldn’t have been dismissing his interest in women as just “lies” when he finally got the chance to write in blacklight):

Dipper is impressed, in the comics, with the fact his Grunkle Ford had once dated a siren:

And a lot of people assume that to have been Bill, since the page we can see is talking about Bill, but... that doesn’t make much sense. Why Dipper would be so happy and excited and not horrified? After all, he hates and fears Bill. Why wouldn’t Dipper go straight to the point and call the “siren” by his name, Bill? Why would Dipper describe Bill by “siren” and not “demon”? What kind of euphemism is this? I think it’s way more likely that Dipper had read about the siren in a previous page and just happened to comment about it when he reached the Bill page.

The siren in question is probably this girlie from the storyboard of AToTS drawn and shared by S. H. Cotguno on TikTok.

And, of course, we can’t forget one of the deleted scenes from the end credit montage:

This one is particularly hilarious to me because when I first watched it, I thought it was supposed to be about the Stan twins were competing for the same lady. But then I realized that Stan had arrived first, smirking and holding his own flower, and sat down. Only then Ford appears and sits down too, mirroring Stan’s smirk, despite the fact he had already seen Stan there. And Stan doesn’t seem phased by Ford’s arrival, he continues smirking. Only when the lady gets up and leaves them that they turn angrily to each other 😭 They were fully ready to share her...

So yeah, I do believe Ford was/is interested in women in the same way he is in men, but he can’t deal with that very well for lots of reasons. I think he tries, but ultimately doesn’t experience romance in the way Stan does and that confuses and frustrates him. The only “people” he’s been truly in love with, imo, were Bill and Stan, and it would still be that way if Bill and Stan were female. So yeah, Ford to me is a bi ice cream with demi sauce on top.

I don’t think that’s how the Stans would define themselves, though. They likely don’t even know most of LGBTQ+ labels, much less the fact that you can be both demi and bi and stuff like that, and I prefer to stick to a more realistic approach.

Stanley, jokes about marrying Goldie aside, would probably still think he’s straight. His twin is... his twin is something special, okay? Ford doesn’t count. Ford is Ford.

Ford, on the other hand, would be so out of his depth that he wouldn’t even know how to answer the question. I don’t know if he would even be able to identify his attraction to Bill as romantic, and being in love with Stan just feels natural to him.

#the bunny analyzes #the bunny answers #stancest #stancest meta

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jadeylovesmarvelxo · 2 years ago

Text

The Only One

Steve Harrington x Reader.

Summary; I was watching Stranger Things earlier and the part where Nancy is in the trance that Vecna has her under and all I can think about is writing a similar story with the reader (like it's you it happens to instead of Nancy) and Steve freaking out.

You've been sleeping together for a while, it's just casual to him at least but you're falling for him but don't want to tell him, especially with all the shit going on in The Upside Down and Hawkins and with Steve and Nancy kinda connecting again.

Steve realises when he thinks he's going to lose you that he loves you and not Nancy and he confesses he loves you just as Vecna's hold on you breaks.

Warnings; Angst with a happy ending. 18+ minors dni

I don't give anyone permission to copy, reuse or repost my work.

❤️

The relationship between you and Steve had started a few months ago, both of you growing closer since July 4th last year.

The first night you slept together was a combination of Steve bemoaning a string of bad dates he had went on with a girl called Demi and you wanting to forget all the nightmares surrounding July 4th for a little while.

Then it snowballed to meeting up regularly, sneaking around during your shifts together at Family Video.

Honestly, the sex was mind blowing and the more you lost yourself in Steve, talking to each other until the early morning, getting to know him the more you fell for him.

Yet you kept quiet even as the new threat plaguing Hawkins was in full force.

It was no time to confess feelings, not now.

The new threat, Vecna. It drew Nancy and Steve together again, the unresolved tension hung in the air and you could only watch your stomach sinking as Steve gazed at Nancy.

He still loved her. He would never love you and it broke your heart.

Nancy dove right after Steve as fast as you did when he was pulled under water by the vines and into The Upside Down.

You saw the looks as she tended to his wounds after the demo bat attack, the way he reached for her when earthquakes rocked the Upside Down.

Every interaction tore your heart in two and yet you couldn't say a thing because no one knew about you and Steve.

Let's face it even if they did it's not like you could compare to Nancy. She was the first girl Steve loved, she was special.

You were just an outlet to him. Even if sometimes you thought that his feelings for you were deepening it was most likely wishful thinking on your part.

It didn't matter though, not now. Not when you had a possible brewing apocalypse to help stop.

So you pushed your broken heart aside.

❤️

You didn't know what happened. One minute you were climbing the rope made of bedsheets that Dustin had fashioned to help aid your way out of The Upside Down.

The next minute everything changed and you were falling through the air into nothingness, hearing the faint echoes of Steve calling your name fading away.

When you finally landed after what feels like hours, you're at the mall standing up shakily as fireworks burst around you.

Anna your friend who died last year near the mall, flayed just like all the other poor souls who had lost their life is currently walking towards you with a soft smile on her features.

Memories from last summer flood through you, how she died.

She was heading to the mall to pick you up from your shift at the small boutique clothing store but unbeknownst to her you were with the Scoop Troop at the time when you were meant to be finishing your shift and meeting her.

On the way there she had met Billy and it was too late for her, she had joined the flayed.

Guilt filled you up inside because you hadn't told her what had been going on with Billy, no matter if she thought it crazy or unbelievable if she knew what was really going on in Hawkins then she wouldn't have been out in the first place.

You were with Dustin, Erica, Robin and Steve at the time, pulled into the Scoop Troops mission to decode a translation that Dustin had heard on the radio.

You were friends with Robin and she reached out for your help in decoding the saying as both of you learnt many languages.

Everything after that was a blur, investigating that delivery company, being trapped in the lift that plunged down to the depths of Starcourt mall, being captured by Russians, Steve taking a beating for you and Robin...

Helping Dustin's friend El from Billy and that horrifying monster from trying to kill her, it was terrifying, your heart hammering in your chest as you were introduced to the horrors of living in Hawkins.

Another dimension of sorts right under your feet.

Anna walks over to you and your frozen on the spot. When Anna was confirmed to be part of the many people that died as the part of the Flayed, you were inconsolable.

The guilt plagued you, survivors guilt the counsellor had told you when you spoke about Anna to her briefly.

"Why didn't you mention what was happening? You knew what was going on in Hawkins with Billy, that monster and yet and not once did you mention anything to me?"

The words eat away at you and tears roll down your cheeks because you could have said something, found Anna and warned her once you escaped from the Russians but you didn't.

Between being drugged by the Russians, to escaping them and then all the shit that followed everything was focused on the absolute nightmare you and the rest of the Scoop Troop found yourself in.

But what if you had managed to find Anna somehow? It was irrational as there was no time but your mind constantly clung to the what ifs?

"There was no time, I'm so sorry, I wish I could have found some way to save you. Every day I think of what I could have done...I"

The smile from her face slips and anger flashes across her features.

"Lies! You could have but you didn't! You'd rather run around with Steve Harrington!

I bet you're so happy right now that his attention is all on you, sleeping with him to dull the fact that you're a bad friend, the guilt eating away at you"

Sobs escape your lips and you shake your head desperate for her to understand but she grips your arms tight, shaking you.

The smile is back but it's eerie, it makes your stomach bottom out.

"No matter, you'll die soon too, you all will" the voice that speaks isn't Anna this time. No, this voice sends chills down your spine and Anna morphs into a thing of nightmares.

The evil that killed Chrissy, Jordan and Freddie. Who had cursed Max.

Vecna.

✨

❤️

You're someplace new now, surrounded by the bodies of people, children, teens and adults blooded and dead on the floor.

Fear pulses through you as you run through the halls. There's a sinking feeling inside you that this is where El was kept and experimented on, the others like her.

Sadness aches deep in your bones. What happened here?

Growls fill the air and fear roots you to the spot as Vecna approaches and calls your name.

No matter where you run it's no use because he will find you, even as you try desperately to move the boards blocking off the door you know it's no use.

Still, every instinct in you compels you to fight, to escape.

Vines snake their way up your jeans and tighten around your skin before you can stop it.

They wrap around your legs and your arms to keep you in place.

Vecna walks slowly towards you, and your heart pounds in your chest.

"It's time for me to show you who I am. What is coming. You can't escape it. Victory will be mine" his fingers latch onto your face and visions flash through your mind.

Vecna was Henry , Victor Creels, son, he was the cause of the physiological torture of his family, of his mother and sisters deaths.

Brenner found Henry at the hospital when the power overwhelmed him, fabricating that Henry died in a coma when in reality he became Brenners first test subject.

001

Then there's flashes of things, all of it leading up to a fight of powers between El and 001 after he murdered all the others like El, the doctors and scientists.

El refusing to join him to rid the world of mankind.

Then she sees how he became Vecna, how he first ended up in The Upside Down, his hatred for humans, thirst for revenge palpable.

Then the vision changes.

Death, screaming, blood everywhere. The bodies of your parents, of Robin and Steve lay dead as monsters ravage Hawkins.

This is Vecna's endgame. To open the gates between Hawkins and The Upside Down for good. To unleash hell.

Steves voice is calling to you. You hear it barely at first but it grows stronger.

I love you.

It must be a trick, a torture method of Vecna's because you know that isn't true. Steve doesn't love you.

At that moment the thrall you are under breaks and you are back in The Upside Down with Steve gasping for breath and shaking from what you have seen.

❤️

At the very second you were under Vecna's curse in The Upside Down, Steve had gestured for you to go next to climb the rope and get out of the hell scape you were in but when you don't respond he turns to you in confusion.

Your eyes are rolling to the back of your head, your body twitching and it feels like there is ice in his veins as realises that Vecna has invaded your mind.

The curse. Pure fear shoots through him and he swears his heart almost stops and he rushes to you, shaking you and shouting your name.

Confused voices echo from above as he sees Dustin, Nancy and Eddie peer down at you and him in worry.

"Get tapes, anything you can! Now!" he yells at them as he begs you to snap out of the trance.

"Please, please sweetheart"

Were you going to die? The thought of your body broken, limbs bent in unnatural angles, just gone... almost breaks him.

The thought of not seeing you smile, hearing you giggle at his lame jokes or curling up beside him, head rested on his chest terrifies him.

"Baby, please. Can you hear me?" he begs but it's like talking to a brick wall. You don't respond just stay under the trance and Steve just for a few seconds feels numb with agony.

Quickly he snaps out of it. No, he will reach you and you'll be fine he tells himself even when it feels like he can't breathe and dread and panic clouds his mind.

He can hear the faint sounds from up in Eddie's trailer and he shouts for the others to hurry.

There has to be something in the Munson trailer to use, some tape that Munson has that possibly includes your favourite song.

As he thinks of this he knows it's a long shot because your musical tastes and Eddie's were worlds apart.

You sang along to Blondie or Madonna, danced around your room to Duran Duran and The Beatles, tapes of Journey, AC/DC, would Munson have something of them?

He knows your favourite song though, it comes to him as he remembers you singing it in his car when he picked you and Robin up one day.

Crazy for you- Madonna. Frantically he shouts to the others to find the tape with Crazy for You on it, even though he knows deep down Munson won't have anything like it.

Time is running out and he's desperate, begs you to wake.

"I can't lose you, sweetheart. Come back to me please come back to me"

It's then he realized something that he's known deep down for a while and yet never fully accepted until now.

Nancy and him could never work, not again. They were too different, yeah they needed to clear the air between them, many things were left unresolved but there was no going back.

He didn't want Nancy back because he had moved on. Over the last few months, he had slowly fallen in love with you.

It was you who he wanted to be with. It was you who he loved.

"I love you, sweetheart, come back to me. I love you" he calls to you.

He startles as you come out of your trance and he catches you before you drop to the ground.

Relief floods through him and he cradles you to his chest. Did you hear his confession? What had happened when you were under Vecna's spell?

"Steve" you choke out as tears run down your cheek and he wipes them away tenderly.

"I'm here honey, I'm here"

❤️

Somehow Steve had managed to get you and him out of the Upside Down and when you woke up to Nancy and Max kneeling next to you the vision Vecna showed you comes to the forefront.

"What happened?" Nancy asks kindly and you recall everything that occurred, leaving nothing out.

Everything Vecna showed you. Including the vision that would haunt your dreams.

"All I could see was death everywhere, cracks along Hawkins splitting the town in half, monsters and darkness and my parents were dead... Robin and... Steve" he is at you at once and his hand entwines with yours.

"It was what would happen if Vecna won, if Max died and the gates opened. Hell would follow, death. We can't let that happen" you say and your voice goes stronger, fiercer.

It was time to save Hawkins, save Max and avenge Chrissy, Jordan and Freddies death.

❤️

A few days had passed since Vecna's defeat, The Upside Down being gone for good.

Eddie was recovering in hospital, Hopper miraculously back from the dead had taken on the role of sheriff and cleared Eddie of any involvement in Chrissy, Jordan and Freddie's deaths.

Max was recovering in hospital as well, she almost didn't make it when she was under Vecna's curse but somehow, by some miracle El's powers had come back and even in California she helped Max.

All of you banded together to weaken Vecna but El delivered the killing blow that destroyed the mind flyer and The Upside for good.

Now she was back along with Hopper, Joyce, Murray, Jonathan and Will.

Also, their friend Argyle who you liked immediately, the guy knew how to chill out.

There's a light tapping on your window and you peer up and giggle at what you see.

Steve was perched outside your window, flowers in hand and you smile as you open the window and let him inside.

"You could just use the front door you know" he shrugs, looking nervous.

"Where's the fun in that? He jokes and sits down, I spoke to Nancy, was long overdue. Cleared up some things"

Was he here to tell you he was back together with Nancy? You want so desperately to tell him you love him but what would be the point?

It would just add to his confusion, make him feel guilty he didn't return your feelings and you didn't want that.

His expression is tender and he stares down at you.

"Are you and Nancy together again?" you blurt out and he softens and shakes his head.

"No honey we aren't" This wasn't what you expected to hear.

"I don't understand. You still love her?" he settles beside you on the bed.

"We talked a lot. Both of us realised we would never work. I don't love Nancy, she's the past sweetheart. We both agreed that"

He hands you the flowers and something akin to hope blooms in your chest.

"I didn't see any of this coming you know? Getting to know you better, us being together. I didn't expect to fall in love with you but I did"

He loved you. What you heard wasn't a trick. He truly loved you.

"When I thought I was going to lose you I told you, I don't know if you even heard me" he murmurs and you take his hands on yours feeling giddy.

"I heard. Shit, I thought it was some torture trick from Vecna and all along it really was you?" his lips press to your forehead.

"I'm sorry it took so long for me to realise sweetheart, sorry you thought I still loved Nancy when it's you I want, only you sweetheart"

Gently you touch his cheek, wincing as you gaze at the scar around his throat, the scar made by the Demobats tail.

"Does it still hurt?" you ask worriedly and he nods as you press a tender kiss near it.

"Sometimes, not now though" his arms wrap around you and he pulls you onto his knee.

"I love you, Steve, so much. I've been wanting to tell you for so long" he smiles as his head rests on top of yours.

"How about a date tomorrow? A chance to spoil my girl, dinner and a movie?" you agree to this and the joy in the air is palpable, you would discuss paying half for the date tomorrow even if Steve would argue against it.

For now, you just let the glow of happiness fill you.

"It's a date"

❤️

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington angst #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington x you #steve harrington fluff

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