#IT HAS NOT BEEN PROOF READ

[starry-bi-sky]

yall ever think Shen Yuan went through like, internet withdrawal after being transmigrated into Shen Qingqiu? Like, he's canonically a NEET shut-in who did nothing but spend his time online, you can't tell me that for the first week or first few weeks of being SQQ he wasn't twitchy.

Like, reaching instinctively to his pockets for a phone that wasn't there, having an obsessive itch in the back of his mind that he should check and see if X or Y novel or webcomic has updated -- only to realize he can't anymore and being irritated by it. Wanting to go and see if there's new posts about this or that, but again realizing that he can't.

When he's bored or uncomfortable or just feels like wanting to escape he tries to go for his phone to distract himself, but oops! Not there anymore, and now he has to find a new and different way to distract himself from his feelings. And going through system notifications, quests, etc only does so much.

And there's that Tetris Effect too. SQQ makes a mistake while writing and instinctively goes to backspace on it except hey-ho that's not a keyboard and now he just dipped his pinkie into a bottle of ink or on a still-drying letter.

With him scrambling to fix his reputation and learn how to be a peak lord, I think his abrupt cold-turkey from all things internet would just be another straw on the camel's back that he promptly Ignores until it goes away on its own after he acclimates to his new surroundings.

[epiphainie]

i simply can't get over how tommy immediately opens up to buck about his feelings over the current 118. like saying "i wanted to be a part of that" is such an honest and personal admission to a person you barely know, especially to a person who is a part of that thing you wanted in. choosing the words "i was jealous" is a direct admission of being envious which is hardly considered the most admirable or desired feeling by anyone. it's also him admitting that he lacks that type of deep connection which is not something many people are very forthcoming about, let alone with people they met two weeks ago. and you can see in his body language that everything he says at that moment comes from this very real and honest place. it's not calculated, it's not just him trying to make buck feel better about his own feelings of jealousy. it's personal to tommy, honest, real, even a little uncomfortable as it takes a bit of effort but tommy says it anyway because he genuinely feels like he can be vulnerable with buck about this because buck has been vulnerable with him. it's like the truest moment of connection between two people.

[tenderpreyy]

​I’m thinking again about Astarions sexuality and how I've seen some people (to be fair, just a few) talk about it. Mainly, people pointing out his flamboyant behavior, and that us as players are learning more about his past male lovers than female ones and basically all these things for some people pointing to him being gay or at least not interested in women in the same way he is in men. And him only being a romance option regardless of gender, because, well, all companions are and he is therefore just "playersexual", only showing interest in female player characters because he has to, because of the game mechanics.

I think what really rubs me the wrong way about this topic is that it echoes the kind of things bi/pan people (speaking as a bisexual woman myself) find themselves dealing with irl. Whether through some form of internalized biphobia or from the outside through other people's comments. Of course this is about a fictional character so it’s not like he has any feelings that could be hurt. But when i see people tallying up how often he mentions men vs. how often he mentions women it really reminds me of a way of thinking I sometimes fall into in regards to my own sexuality. This is definitely just an internalized response and not something I actually believe when I truly think about it for a second, but I know these patterns of thought very well. Of observing my own behavior. How often do I find which gender attractive? Am I attracted "enough" to women? Do I talk about men's attractiveness too often? Is it the other way around? Am I only saying this woman is attractive to prove something to myself? I literally have a girlfriend and my attitude towards mine or other's sexual orientation is generally a huge big "whatever, I don't care". And I still have a passing thought like that from time to time.

So seeing people talk about a fictional character in this way really sends home how many people (whether consciously or unconsciously) see attraction as some sort of equation, you can solve, where in the end you get a result of either gay or straight.

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

Randomly thinking about “tolerate it” (narrator voice: it was not random) and how under the cloak of fiction it is ostensibly inspired by works like “Rebecca” (which Taylor said she read during the 2020 lockdowns I believe?), with the line of “you’re so much older and wiser” indicating that the speaker is significantly younger and inexperienced compared to the person she’s speaking to and a pretty direct reference to the plot of the book.

But I saw something somewhere once that stuck with me about how it might not be referring to relative age between the characters but chronological age as in the passage of time in a relationship. And that made me think about how in a contemporary context, it might not necessarily be referencing an actual age gap between the two characters, but rather a sarcastic or cynical response to the man’s claims that he has matured (“you’re so much older and wiser [than you were before/than you were when we met/etc.]”), which then made me think about that line in relation to the woman. And that it could be taken like, “you act like you’ve matured so much in our time together and like you know everything, while I’m supposedly still stuck as the girl I was when we first met.”

Which then made me think of the “right where you left me” of it all and did you ever hear about the girl who got frozen time went on for everyone else she won’t know it and the bit in Miss Americana where she talks about how celebrities get frozen at the age at which they got famous, and how she’s had to play catch up in a lot of ways not just in her emotional growth but kind of in general. (Which also made me wonder if she’s ever been called out for immaturity/lack of curiosity/lack of education about things in her life…)

Which then made me think about the rest of the song, and @taylortruther’s posts yesterday about “seven” and “Daylight” and the way Taylor idealizes her youth yet contrasts it with an almost sinister reality in its wake, and the line, “I sit by the door like I’m just a kid,” because the discussion raised that her relationship let her recapture some of the childlike joy and wonder she’d lost. So this line is a double-edged sword: the speaker sits by the door with childlike hope that the person will come home and cherish her, but on the darker side, feels like the child dealing with the monsters she doesn’t have names for yet and the feelings of isolation she felt as she aged.

I’m not saying the song is necessarily autobiographical; like most of the songs on folkmore, it’s clearly a fictionalized story based on media she’d consumed and created, but we know a lot of the fictional songs were infused with her own feelings and experiences and… This idea swirling in my head picked up steam and now I kind of can’t stop thinking about it. Sorry but I’m a little obsessed now.

Like maybe it might start to shed light on why she identified so strongly with the novel in the first place…

[flutterflora]

Whenever I see people say things like "Pinkie Pie should've been a pegasus" or "Fluttershy fits earth pony more" I get a little frustrated because TO ME the mane six have always been a really good example of "societal expectations" VS "societal deviance" of the three pony species within equestria.

Earth ponies are almost always expected to be providers. Like the Apple family for example or the Cake family OR even the "flower trio". They provide necessities, often food or they often provide hard labour (note how "background" jobs like construction and taxi pulling are most often done by earth ponies too). Applejack is obviously a perfect example of this! She's the head of her family, she's extremely hard working, shes incredibly physically strong, she's known and relied on by most of Ponyvill. Applejack very much lives up to the expectations that pony society has of earth ponies.

Pinkie Pie on the other hand is not one bit concerned with hard work. Her whole thing is having fun and throwing parties. In a way she is also providing something very important and necessary, socialisation and relaxation, however these are generally not deemed as valuable as strenuous labour and food production. Pinkie Pie is always written off as "childish" or not taking things seriously enough. She isn't deemed as very reliable a lot of the time and has to work very hard to prove herself, more so than someone like Applejack.

Ponyvill was founded by earth pony farmers, and is densely populated by earth ponies. Earth ponies are expected to work hard and grow food and provide for everyone, their roles are incredibly necessary and their work is highly appreciated. However, without someone like Pinkie Pie who deviates from those expectations, Ponyvill would be a miserable place (as seen in the episode Magical Mystery Cure). She may not be a farmer or a construction worker but her divergence from earth pony "standards" is what keeps everything in balance.

The same can be said for Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy too. Rainbow Dash is an exceptional athlete, she flies like no other pony and she almost always has her wits about her. At the end of the day, Rainbow Dash is truly a performer at heart, she wants to be in the Wonderbolts and show off her skills to all of Equestria. Pegasi are expected to be fast, agile, eager, always cool, proud and quick witted just like the Wonderbolts, and just like Rainbow Dash. She is a peak performance pegasus.

Fluttershy is Rainbows exact opposite. She doesn't care for speed, adventure or displays of athleticism, she truly doesn't even care for flying. She is, in both a literal and metaphorical way, very "down to earth", however her role is still very important and her being a pegasus is still very integral to who she is. If it weren't for her experiences of being ostracised for being different she would never have the empathy and dedication to her animals the way she does (and on more practical note, being able to fly does aid her in her work a lot the time). Fluttershy slows down, she's quiet and she gentle which something that other pegasi (and earth ponies honestly) struggle with. It was alway right for Fluttershy to be a pegasus who could soar the skies, because if she never fell down to earth she would have never found her true calling. Without ponies like her, many important things, creatures and events would go unnoticed and unchecked.

Rarity and Twilight Sparkle is kind of a funny one because I think a lot of people may expect Twilight to be the prime example of unicorns, but that's not really true at all. Twilight, despite being our mane character, is actually the deviant one here.

This is illustrated for us almost immediately in the first episode, where she's invited to a party by three other unicorns but ditches it to go study instead. Magic is merely a tool for most unicorns, but for ponies like Twilight or Starlight, it is their whole existence, it's what they were quite literally born to do. Twilight does not value social status at all, she doesn't have time to and growing up so stuck in her studies I'm not even sure she aware that it's such a big deal to others, especially within Canterlot. It's also worth noting that to Twilight, Princess Celestia was always her teacher and Princess Cadence was her babysitter so their status as royals never really mattered to her and she's able to see them more are regular ponies for that reason also.

Most Unicorns are socialites, they value "social currency" and monetary gain more than they value magic. They don't care that the Princesses are very powerful magically, they care more about their political powers and their social status as royals. We see this clearly in the season 2 episode "Sweet and Elite" where Rarity gets swept up on the high society life of Canterlot, when she mentions being from Ponyvill to two random snobby unicorns they look down on her, yet once it's revealed that she's staying at the castle for her visit, things change, mostly notably: her status. Rarity is a prime example of a unicorn, she's stylish, she's ambitious, she's concerned with image, she's social, she has very fine tastes and she's a businesswoman.

As the series progresses we she both Twilight and Rarity gain some fame. Twilight is mostly inconvenienced and troubled by this whereas Rarity, like most unicorns would, relishes in any sort of limelight. Unicorns are expected to be professional, they're most often more modern or "ahead of the curve" than other ponies and tend they to be the primary business owners of Equestria. However without ponies like Twilight, magic would become just an afterthought. Without powerful wizards like Starswirl, dedicated students like Subburt or magic obsessed freaks (affectionate) like Twilight Sparkle, pony society would crumble.

Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Rarity are prime examples of what is expected of earth ponies, pegasi and unicorns, respectively, in Equestrian society. However without ponies like Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy and Twilight Sparkle there would be no balance and no progression. In fact in the episode "Hearts Warming Eve" we literally get canon lore telling us that if it wasn't for three ponies who deviated from the rules and expectations of their respective tribes, that Equestria wouldn't even exist today.

I think the mane six are a great small scale example of how pony society functions and I really appreciate this aspect of the writing <3

[thinkingofausername]

mouthwashing has truly showed me that we haven't evolved from the fucking witch trials. people can only ever point fingers, judge, hate, condemn, root for damnation. how the fuck do you look at a game about capitalism, psychological instability, complex characters, endless nuance and get out of the experience with the braindead take "curly horrible. anya, daisuke and swansea wonderful. jimmy bad." too many people haven't moved on from the reasoning of five year olds and disney - hero good and villain bad. people aren't fucking cartoon characters. we're not only good or bad. media literacy is truly dead and gone.

[eustassslut]

If we're talking full Stockholm Syndrome what does the reader like about our Yandere boys? Heat and Killer obviously give gifts and treat the reader decently but do Kid and Wire care if they're liked and what do they do to win affection?

this is a very good question actually. i think what the reader likes about each boy would depend on the individual experiences shared between all of them.

with Heat, i think the reader would like how eager he is to please them. Heat is so desperate to have his affections received that he'll do anything for the reader, even if it means breaking some rules and giving them gifts he's not supposed to buy. falling into this twisted love with Heat guarantees the reader with more safety and stability than with the others, despite the fact he is definitely the most delusional. the reader would also like that Heat naturally runs hot and lets them hug him when they're cold, as well as that he waits for them to initiate physical contact and doesn't try to make it sexual unless the reader wants it to be.

Killer's main selling point for the reader would be how easy he is to talk to. despite his long list of insecurities and his hatred of talking about his own feelings or emotions, Killer is extremely observant and knows exactly what his crew is feeling or thinking. he doesn't like to gossip and tends to just keep anything he's told to himself unless he feels it's a threat to the crew. so whatever the reader tells him, stays between them because he likes feeling that they have such a special bond that the others will never understand or relate to.

Killer also knows when punishments are going too far and because he has the most authority on the ship since everyone listens to him, Killer can step in at any time to help the reader without them getting in trouble. the reader would like how dependable he is and would begin to fall for him because of how he treats them with such respect and care after each punishment, making sure they're fed and looked after properly.

with both Heat and Killer, the reader would like how similar it is to having actual boyfriends. both boys are clearly insane and have trapped the reader on their ship forever but during the quiet and peaceful moments it's easy to pretend like this is a proper relationship with communicate, gifts and physical affection.

Kid and Wire however, are significantly harder for the reader to find something to bond with them over it or to feel anything positive because of how cruel and abusive both boys naturally act.

on the surface Kid and Wire both like to pretend they don't care about having their feelings reciprocated and that the reader refuses to touch or look at them unless forced, but secretly it really upsets them. they are both incredibly touch starved and just want to be liked by the person they love. when the reader first 'joins' the crew, neither of them give a shit about receiving affection or building a relationship. but when the reader starts giving Heat and Killer affection as the Stockholm Syndrome begins to take place, Wire and Kid naturally start to get jealous of the others.

suddenly Kid wants to have quiet moments in his workshop with the reader where they just cuddle up together doing their own things and wants the reader to sit on his lap whilst he creates them pretty gifts from scratch. so he starts putting in the effort to find out what they like and figure out what their hobbies are. it doesn't matter whatever the reader's interest might be, Kid wants to know it and will happily sit listening to them talk about it for hours. however, he's not going to approach this properly and will basically just yell at the poor reader to tell him about themselves out of the blue. so unfortunately for Kid it's going to be a slow process until the reader fully starts to experience the effects of Stockholm Syndrome for him but when they do, the reader would like how Kid prioritises whatever they have to say and takes whatever they say (only about their hobbies/themselves) on board.

the reader would also become more drawn and attached to Kid if he ever showed his more vulnerable side, which is usually reserved for Killer, to them.

with Wire, however, it is a lot harder to find things to like about him. he's just too mean and horrible to the reader, there's nothing to really like about how he constantly bullies and ridicules them. but that doesn't mean it's not possible to experience Stockholm Syndrome for him! it would just take a lot longer to begin developing compared to the others because he's so confusing and difficult to get along with. it wouldn't happen until the reader starts to notice just how sweet and caring Wire can be towards his crew members in the relaxing moments. suddenly the reader begins to hyper-fixate on this soft side that Wire has to others and starts putting in some subconscious effort to please him.

it would take them a while, but within a year of living on the Victoria Punk, the reader begins to develop an understanding of Wire and becomes increasingly happier to play along with his cruel games for the rare moments where he's so gentle towards them. whilst this want to be liked by the other would probably be one sided for the reader, Wire would increasingly grow eager to trade a nicer version of himself to the reader in exchange for the things he feels he needs. if giving the reader privacy or the opportunity to cry in peace makes it so they take his cruel version of affection, then he's happy to make the trade. therefore, the only instance i can really see the reader beginning to fall for Wire is through how he openly treats others around him and that is what they would like the most about them.

overall, like you mentioned, Heat and Killer would be the ones to obsessively give gifts of things deemed valuable to the reader for any affection they can get due to being so incredibly touch starved and lonely which results in a very quick Stockholm Syndrome scenario. however i also think that Kid would also give them gifts that he made for affection, but this would only happen if he had begun to want to have his feelings reciprocated by the reader/when he decides he is also in dire need of affection and would only result in a Stockholm Syndrome scenario with the reader if he made the first move to be more gentle. Wire however is too mean to truly ever give proper gifts since he doesn't really care about being loved back by the reader but his versions are the most valuable when remembering how mean he is.

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[aresianrepose]

Before the semester kicks off and murders me, @disniq​ asked for my essay on Jason Todd and hysteria. So, without further ado, here is an actual essay (fucking dissertation) because I refuse brevity. It is extremely long. I’ve split it into sections so you can find the section header and read what you want. This does not encompass all the narrative trauma themes and lived experiences that this boy holds, just specifically hysteria. 

Jason Todd, The Hysteric & Bruce Wayne, The Batman

I think it’s a common reading that Jason Todd is girl-coded and the patron saint of victims, at least within the circle that I’ve fallen into within this fandom. There are plenty of meta discussions on why those readings stand, so I’m not going to reiterate them. A pillar of him being girl-coded and someone trauma survivors have latched onto as one of our own has to do with being written in the context of hysterical femininity. And let me just say, I don’t think that writing was done in a way that he was intentionally coded as hysterical, but it is a function of our patriarchal society that this coding was used on him albeit without the explicit purpose of writing a hysteric story. 

For the purpose of this post: the word woman includes ciswomen, transwomen, and any person who is socially positioned as a woman regardless of gender identity. I include the positionality here because anyone can experience misogyny and sexism depending on the perception of the perpetrators either interpersonally or systemically. 

The History and Context of Hysteria

To understand the context, we have to look at the history and oppression of hysteria. Hysteria (in the modern context of psychology) emerged in the nineteenth century and is difficult to define by design and often applied to traumatized, unruly, and broken women. The main patriarchs who contributed to hysterical study were Jean-Martin Charcot and Sigmund Freud. I only mention this because it’s important to know their names moving forward for any of this to make sense. The beginning of this started with Charcot literally putting women whose lives had been marked by rape, abuse, exploitation, and poverty on display in his Tuesday lectures (which were open to the public) to show his findings on hysteria. This was actually seen as restoring dignity (fucking yikes) to the women because before Charcot these hysterical women were cast aside and not treated at all. In Charcot’s work, the women’s speech was seen as simply “vocalization” and their inner lives, their stories, their words, were silenced. After hearing a woman cry for her mother during one of the public sessions Charcot remarked, “Again, note these screams. You could say it’s a lot of noise over nothing” (Herman). 

This led to Freud, Charcot’s student, wanting to surpass his teacher by discovering the cause of hysteria. This was disastrous. Freud started with listening to the hysterics. In doing so, he learned and believed them about the abuse, rape, and exploitation of their pasts. He then published his work and gave a lecture on it. The work rivals even contemporary psychological work on trauma in it’s level of compassion, understanding, and treatment of survivors. However, he was then labeled a feminist (this was all happening during the first wave of feminism) and professionally ostracized. How in the world could these aristocratic French men be sexually abusing their wives, sisters, and daughters??? Insanity, truly. And... This always fucking gets me. He recanted his work and then told his patients they all imagined it because they wanted to be sexually abused by their husbands, brothers, and fathers. This set back the study of trauma by literally a century. One colleague called his work “a scientific fairy-tale” simply because he had the audacity to believe victims. Also, I want to point out that the famous hysteria case during this time was the case of Anna O and she was ultimately villainized by the entire psychological community for going into crisis after her care provider abruptly ended their therapeutic relationship after two years of DAILY sessions. 

Anyway. We can see how the power of these men over vulnerable women silenced, pathologized, villainized, infantilized, and used male ‘logic’ to completely destroy their credibility and lives under the guise of care and hysteria. Even when credible men lend their expertise and voices to the victims, their voices are silenced. This particular iteration of hysteria lasted over a century, and we are still dealing with the consequences of these actions and ideas within our social construction, medical and mental health care, interpersonal relationships, and more. Patriarchal pillars such as hysteria don’t die. We saw it move from hysteria to schizophrenia (which used to have the same symptoms of hysteria before the diagnosis changed in more contemporary psychology) after this which led to widespread lobotomies and electroshock therapy (my least favorite case of a lobotomy being done is on a woman who was diagnosed with LITERALLY ‘narcissist husband’) to depression in the 40s-50s with the over prescription of benzodiazepines to house wives to keep them in a zombie state (these prescriptions were sometimes double and triple what we take today with the intent of medical catatonia). In my opinion, as well as other counselors within the feminist therapy theoretical orientation, we are currently seeing it with the emergence of borderline-personality disorder. Think about how BPD is treated and demonized for a second. I professionally know therapists who refuse to work with BPD clients due to this villainization and just fucking gross perception of victims.

These are just the highlights, but it shows the history of hysteria. There have been centuries of women being marked as hysterical and the cures have ranged from lobotomy to bed rest (which sounds not so bad but read the Yellow Wallpaper and get back to me on that one). While the Yellow Wallpaper is fictional, the life behind it was not. After the traumatic birth of her child the author, Charlotte Perkins Gilman, was remanded to bed rest by the authority of her husband and doctor. Within the sphere of medical control, hysterical women are often treated as children while their doctors make decisions for their mental well-being without consulting them, or they hide the truth of their procedures for “the woman’s own good” and because “she’s hysterical and wouldn’t comprehend the logical need for this.” She then had a mental break due to the treatment. Again, we see hysterical women being silenced, infantilized, discredited from their own experiences, and under the narrative control of male logic and voices. 

Hysterical women have often historically been seen as beneath men, except for when they’re dangerous. Listening to victims is inherently threatening to the status quo because all trauma comes from a systemic framework. The framework that upholds patriarchal power. It’s easy to see why that would be seen as dangerous to powerful men. We saw this with the European witch genocide in which oppressed women were targeted and wiped out under the excuse of what was considered women’s work. (Before this time, witchcraft wasn’t tied to any religion and was mostly just seen as women’s work. It was targeted specifically to have an excuse to persecute widows, homeless, disabled, and vulnerable women who no longer had men to reign over them during a time of political unrest and scarce resources). This time period saw hysterical and traumatized women demonized as dangerous, evil, immoral, hypersexual, and supernaturally wily. A threat to the moral fabric of society. 

(Interesting history side note: this caused the view of women’s base traits we have today. It stemmed from the Victorian era that came after this time period in which women learned if they behaved a certain way, they would be spared the stake. For example, before the witch trials, women were actually seen as the ones with unsatiable sexual appetites, something we culturally prescribe to men now.) 

Notice how none of this has to do with the actual abuse that happens to the women, but instead the labeling and treatment of women when they are already showing the symptoms of abuse, trauma, control, exploitation, and rape. 

Jason Todd, The Hysteric

So, how does this relate to Jason Todd? To say that Jason has experienced trauma would be an understatement. Extreme poverty, loss of parent to death and addiction, loss of parent to the justice system, parental abuse, manipulation, witnessing violent crimes, witnessing the aftermath of sexual abuse and assault, arguably (not explicit in the text) his own sexual trauma, witnessing the dead bodies of victims, a violent death, and subsequently a violent resurrection. There’s also an argument to be made for being a child soldier and how that is romanticized up until he dies, but the text does not treat this as traumatizing.

Now, I’m not going to dive into the trauma he experienced. The purpose of this is only to look at how he’s framed as hysterical in the narrative, and as I stated, hysteria was a word slapped on women after they tried to talk about their trauma or exhibited symptoms (or were just unruly women). Jason does embody many facets of the victim experience and this is just one of them. 

Feelings vs “logic” - Firstly, it is really hard to talk calmly about things that you carry, your experiences, your trauma, and things that specifically harm you. It is easy to talk calmly about things that don’t. This is why there is an abuse tactic of gaslighting or silencing victims by framing their very real reactions to harm or their triggers as abuse, this is known as “reactive abuse.” This tactic is also employed in oppressive settings where the privileged group will often default to ‘winning’ a debate by being able to remain calm while the marginalized group whose life, personhood, etc is being harmed by the things being discussed and are unable to have a sterilized, emotionless debate. 

Both of these settings fit Jason nicely within the moral context of vigilante comics. He fought back, he didn’t lay down, and he will do what he deems as necessary to protect himself and others from his fate. This, however, is framed by Bruce and others as being just as bad as his murderer or even just as bad as Joe fucking Chill. To put this in perspective of a real world equivalent. Combine every billionaire on this planet into one person and instead of their shitty business practices murdering people, they did it with their own two hands. And due to their resources and political power, they would never, ever stop killing or be reasonably contained. More people would die with absolute 100% certainty. Would killing that one person make you equally bad as that person or violating the sanctity of life? That’s the moral question that Bruce puts onto Jason. While the moral question inherent to Jason is actually, is there a line worth crossing to provide reasonable safety (for yourself or the nameless community)? There is actually a difference between those two questions and the reactive abuse framing is certainly a choice. Also, it is funny to me that a man with the amount of power Bruce has (and frequently misuses) can lecture a murder victim on the misuse of power and morality. Are we supposed to be agree with his stoic, philosophical lecturing to a marginalized, abused, murder victim? (yes, we are). Bruce leverages (personal) philosophy against victim’s voice for their own safety, and take a wild guess which one is framed as logical and reasonable.

Jason’s morals come secondary to Bruce’s philosophy in a universe where there is still harm being done (but it’s an acceptable harm). Why is killing the line? Bruce is regularly destroying families and lives by feeding them into the prison industrial complex while supporting it with his whole chest. Or he’s disabling and seriously maiming people with the level of violence he uses. 

Crying - Throughout the entire story of Under the Red Hood, we never once see Bruce emote while interacting with Jason outside of tight grimaces. With the exception of the shock he shows at the Joker’s life being threatened, which... Okay, suuure. We never see him cry during any of their interactions, but we do see Jason cry. Specifically, we see him crying when he’s at his most emotionally vulnerable and physically dangerous to the toxic male power fantasy. This kind of vulnerability is rarely shown by male characters, and when it is, it’s usually done with a mist of a tear in their eyes or their face is hidden. There are a few narrative devices that allow men to cry, but they are the exception rather than the rule. Usually, it’s to play for laughs, infantilize, or emasculate. Here, we see Jason combine the violence of a bad victim, bucking the system of power, and fully crying. Just slide right into that hysterical coding like a glove. Jason often shows his feelings entirely. Time and time again, the readers have seen Jason have breakdowns, cry, and be overcome with grief. This is tied to his portrayal as hysterical and unstable in the narrative, but in actuality it shows his capacity for love and how vastly impactful his death was. 

This fits nicely with the next point that Jason fits into the hysterical box. Love is framed as one of his key faults. A son reaching for his father. 

Love - One of Jason’s defining features is the amount of love and compassion he holds. He’s willing to put up with any treatment, shoulder blame, and sacrifice himself for others to almost an unhealthy degree. However, this doesn’t extend to what he defines as his baseline safety. This one line of safety is the one thing that can’t be crossed, even with all of the love he feels for his father. He desperately wants to feel connection, have a family, and be loved in return with the same unwavering ferocity love that he gives. This is such a fucking key part of the victim experience, especially victims of childhood trauma. The desperation to just be chosen. He’s raw and honest with his reasonable expectation for love to provide safety for him and that is framed as hysterical, needy, unstable, naive, and fucking childish. Victims know what they need to have safety, and this framing as Bruce knowing what’s best for Jason and literally giving a cold shoulder to his needs is disgusting. 

Less than - Jason is portrayed as less powerful than Bruce even though they have similar expertise. There are so many instances of this that if you just open any media they both appear in, you can close your eyes, point, and land on an example. It makes me die laughing every time I remember that the Arkham games made Jason just one inch shorter than Bruce. Like, they can’t even be the same fucking height, that’s the level of insecure masculinity surrounding this relationship. Jason cannot and will never be able to be on par with Bruce because of his hysterical femininity and the power of Bruce being the self insert for the toxic male power fantasy. This power dynamic applies to the other batkids as well, but specifically in Jason’s case there is an element of hysteria. The reasons change because he’s so inconsistently written but usually he can’t surpass or even meet a stalemate with Bruce because he’s too emotional, he’s unstable, traumatized, and simply Bad. It’s even explicitly stated by Alfred in Under the Red Hood. 

Victim blaming - Jason deserved to die because he didn’t follow orders. Jason deserved to die for not following his training. Jason deserved to die because he was an angry Robin (oh no a child had an appropriate reaction to sexual violence). Jason deserved to die for being human.

Infantilization - Jason is repeatedly infantilized in contrast to Bruce. When given the ultimatum at the end of UtRH, Bruce speaks to Jason like a child, or a bad dog. Ordering him to do things like, “enough!” or “stop this now.” Bruce knows what’s best for Jason (and for everyone in the entire world), we should really just take his word for it and not the victim’s. Imagine staring at a 6 foot wall of a man and scolding him like a child. Beyond that, as mentioned above, his views of love and safety are framed as childish. Even though they are actually leaning more toward collectivism rather than the rampant individualism that Bruce so strongly defers to. (also, just a side note, collectivistic methods in healing from trauma is actually the only scientifically reliable way to heal. Every other method has absolutely abysmal results and higher rates of relapses.)

Silenced and Safety Villainized - Jason is silenced in his own story, acceptable and honored when he was dead and met with vitriol in life. All of the love given to him as Robin turns to ash as soon as he collides with Bruce’s power and morals. I think any survivor can relate to the experience of being told that what happened to them was a long time ago and it’s time to move on. Or even that they’re leveraging their own safety to get what they want in a manipulative way. Regardless of whether or not there was any accountability or justice for the harm done to them. Alfred asks Bruce if he should remove Jason’s memorial in the cave like two seconds after learning of his resurrection because Jason’s methods of securing safety for himself and using his own voice to define his story. Bruce was able to tell Jason’s story when he died. He was able to memorialize, grieve, and ultimately define Jason’s story because Jason wasn’t there to speak for himself. When Jason does speak for himself, he is villainized and literally stripped of his past significance as Robin (or a good victim) by Alfred within seconds. This is reflected in real life with adoptee advocates speaking about how adoption is unethical/harmful/traumatizing and subsequently being framed as ungrateful, selfish, etc. They were little perfect victims without voices before they grew up and could speak for themselves.

Erased - Gestures at the entirety of how Jason is either talked about or completely erased during the 90s Tim Robin run. He wasn’t convenient to talk about, as victims rarely are. This also ties into how Steph’s death was erased and Babs was written like she “won” at trauma by simply... beating it??? 

Dangerous - Jason is framed as threatening the basic fabric of society (in a story with vigilantes this is hard to do, so they have him oppose the no-kill rule, and then doubled down on Bruce’s characterization of no-killing). Anything that bucks the status-quo is usually marked as villainous in mainstream vigilante/superhero comics, but this is a step beyond that into the interpersonal and political sphere. Hysterical women are often framed as dangerous, villains, snakes, and treacherous (the other side of this coin is weak, pathetic, and pitiable) because they are victimized and then have the audacity to do something to the system about it. Whether that be the system of their immediate families or the political sphere. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Jason was paired with Talia in Lost Days to hammer this point home to the reader. It could’ve just as easily been anyone with access to the Pit that rescued him, but no, we had DC’s favorite brown, treacherous, venomous, female punching bag. 

Bruce Wayne, The Batman

Bruce fits well into the father, enforcer, and logical man slot in Jason’s hysterical story. There is a history of ownership throughout women’s history when it comes to their subjugation to men. Women actually couldn’t be put on trial before the witchcraft genocide because they weren’t seen as legally a person. Their male owner would be put on trial instead. Women would go from being owned by their fathers to their husbands after entering marriage, the most dangerous woman being one who isn’t owned (orphaned, widowed). Bruce does treat (and even thinks) about Jason like he’s something that he owns. He’s his protege, his son, and his responsibility. 

The narrative function of Bruce as a perpetrator in Jason’s story. 

“The perpetrator asks the bystander (reader) to do nothing. He appeals to the universal desire to see, hear, and speak no evil. The victim, on the contrary, asks the bystander (reader) to share the burden of pain. The victim demands action, engagement and remembering” (Herman). 

Bruce does remember what happened to Jason. He keeps a permanent memorial to his dead son. However, this doesn’t translate into any kind of tangible action. He doesn’t do anything to actually stop the murderer who took his son’s life and he continues to throw child soldiers at the problem of crime (how many children have died for the sake of his no-kill rule at this point?). When met with the reality of his inaction, he fits into the perpetrator’s role like a glove:

“In order to escape accountability for his crimes, the perpetrator does everything in his power to promote forgetting. Secrecy and silence are the first line of defense... If secrecy fails, the perpetrator attacks the credibility of his victim. If he cannot silence her absolutely, he tries to make sure that no one listens... From the most blatant denial to the most sophisticated and elegant rationalization... One can expect to hear the same predictable apologies: it never happened; the victim exaggerates; the victim brought it upon herself; and in any case it’s time to forget the past and move on. The more powerful the perpetrator, the greater his prerogative to name and define reality, the more completely his arguments prevail” (Herman). 

I think it is simply fact at this point that Bruce is the head patriarch in Gotham if not, arguably, in the entirety of DC. That level of power in the narrative cannot be ignored, especially when faced with the very real, screaming voice of a victim that Bruce uses all of that power to silence. Bruce, because of his status as patriarch, default protagonist, and self-insert for the toxic male power fantasy, has the ultimate power to name and define reality. Especially to the reader. Bruce doesn’t deny what happened to Jason, because that’s physically impossible to do. But what he does do is ensure that no one listens to Jason, discredits him, and rationalizes his own inaction, actions of violence towards Jason, and victim blames.

Here’s Bruce using the most base form of denial and victim blaming:

After this panel, Bruce also revokes Dick’s access to his childhood home simply for asking a question.

This theme extends to other members of the batfam because of Bruce’s narrative power over them. It’s why we can’t have Dick, Steph, Babs, or even Damian step in and relate to Jason’s trauma or vindicate him. Even when we, the readers, can see parallels and wonder why these conversations or bonds aren’t forming. Jason HAS to be a lone wolf because he is hysterical and a threat to the system of power. This also shows why most of his runs in group settings outside of the batfam fall apart or fall flat. If he was humanized by any other character or had his trauma validated in any actionable way, it would be recognizing the failure of the toxic male power fantasy. The readers are not supposed to see the flaw in this system that allows the bodies of children to pile up and sympathize with one of their voices. It would be a crack in the system of power that exists not only in the source material, but very much within our real world.

Side note: Jason is allowed to interact with others in a wholesome and validating way when he no longer threatens the systemic power of Bruce. When he is silenced by the writers and plays the “nice victim” (like Babs does), he is allowed connection. Only when his healing is done in a way that doesn’t demand action and is only his personal responsibility (gotta love the rampant individualism). If he is hysterical, demands action, and asks for someone to be held accountable for his death, he is shoved away into a lone wolf box. Examples: Gotham Knights (from my very basic understanding, I haven’t played the game, only seen play throughs) and WFA. Victims are acceptable if they do their healing in a neat little box and stay there, but hysterics are the ones who step outside of that box.

Red Hood, The Political Voice of Hysteria and Trauma

Red Hood is deeply political in terms of hysteria and trauma. Herman stated that victims and those that authentically care for them or listen to them intently (whether that be interpersonally, clinically, or professionally) are silenced, ostracized, and discredited. Survivors need a social context that supports the victim and that joins the victim and witness in a common alliance. On an interpersonal level this looks like family, friends, and loved ones. However, trauma is systemic and the social context mentioned above must also be given on a wider social scale. For this to be done, there had to be systemic change and political action. Jason had the interpersonal social support and witnesses to his trauma ripped from him by Bruce. So, we see him move onto a systemic level of addressing trauma in his own political way. He literally cannot escape Bruce and this constant trigger because of Bruce’s philosophy and just... fucking power to define reality... being re-enforced constantly in DC no matter where he tries to go. So, he tries to heal by taking the systemic issue of perpetrators who cannot be held accountable or have fallen through the cracks of accountability into his own hands in a very personal way. A one man political movement.

Whether his methods are moral or ethical doesn’t really matter in the overall framing him as hysteric. He simply has to be opposed by the male power fantasy in some significant way. This shows that the goals, needs, and work towards victim’s and the marginalized’s freedom is dangerous, doomed to fail, and ultimately unethical if the victim is framed in a villain light instead of the more pathetic/pitiable iteration of hysteria. 

You can see how this is not only problematic but also reflects the real world values instilled in arguments against human rights movements (which are intrinsically tied to victims rights). Defunding the police is dangerous, the MeToo movement is dangerous, abolition is dangerous, trans rights are dangerous, etc etc etc. Think of the victims voices tied to each of these movements and how they are integral to the real change offered by these political movements. You can’t have human rights violations without creating victims. And you can’t have political movements surrounding human rights without listening to victims.

We can also see how the individuals within these movements are ostracized, villianized, and often silenced (sometimes ultimately silenced with death) because they rally against the systems of power that victimized them. The framing of traumatized, vulnerable people as hysterical is integral to upholding the system of power that traumatizes and harms them.

A popular comic book movie adaptation that highlights the importance of Jason’s hysterical framing and how it impacts the political narrative/how he is written is V for Vendetta. To be fair, it received an insane amount of backlash by conservatives (not within leftist or liberal spaces) for V’s methods in over throwing fascism, but only because of the movie’s release date being so close to 9/11. V and Jason have many parallels, it’s only the lack of hysterical framing that makes V more palatable to the viewer. We are told, not shown through behavior, that V is traumatized by his past and he does not pick a fight with the protagonist that functions as a toxic male power fantasy. He is the protag, with his version of Bruce being men who are not framed in a sympathetic, heroic, or relatable light. 

Additionally, there is literally an unemoting mask standing between the viewer and V, whereas Jason takes off his helmet to allow the reader to see every aspect of his trauma and pain. V readily dehumanizes himself into an idea, rather than a person. Whereas Jason screams to be seen as a person in a very hysterical way. So, we can see how the framing of Jason as hysteric against the logical, heroic man greatly impacts how the audience reads him when contrasted by a very similar political story/character who uses similar (and arguably more violent) methods to meet his ends. (This just made me realize that I would die for a Jason adaptation written by the Wachowski sisters). 

Jason’s work as Red Hood is seeped in leftist, victim, and community centered politics. His portrayal as a hysterical antagonist (at best an anti-hero) is rooted in misogyny and upholding patriarchal, capitalist, and the prison industrial complex systems of power. He is the righteous embodiment of “the personal is political” for victims. Even his Robin run draws attention to and shows correct, angry reactions to the system of patriarchal power in sexual violence.

Patriarchal Writing and Enforcement

Jason is girl-coded and hysterical because he’s supposed to be emasculated, discredited, and disliked by the reader. He serves the narrative function of boosting the toxic male power fantasy of Bruce and in doing so, the writers use one of the oldest tropes in the book (one that we have all subconsciously been taught since birth) to get the reader on their side. Make him a hysterical woman. 

References: for anyone interested in furthering their understanding of any of the concepts mentioned above and to, you know, use sources for my own writing.

Barstow, A. Witchcraze

Bondi, L., Burman. E. Women and Mental Health: A Feminist Review

Freud, S. The Aietology of Hysteria

Gilman, C. P. The Yellow Wallpaper

Herman, J. Trauma and Recovery

Ussher, J. The Madness of Women.

Van der Kolk, B. The Body Keeps the Score

Wilkin, L., Hillock, S. Enhancing MSW Students’ Efficacy in Working with Trauma, Violence, and Oppression: An Integrated Feminist-Trauma Framework for Social Work Education

[anglerflsh]

my favourite passtime is making up incredibly unaccurate armour designs. That's a lie my passtime is researching but this comes at a close second

[slavhew]

Hello!

If you're not too busy, would you mind listing some of the things you think count as death flags for Mr. Spender?

There's the obvious fact that he's the "old" mentor to group of young protagonists, but what else do you think would count?

OHH BOY ok so I'd think I'm a crackpot for this but since we're talking about Zack "Foreshadowing" Morrison. I have some thoughts

No harm in leading with the (chronologically) first thing that jumped out at me:

This one IMMEDIATELY made me antsy whenever I came back to it after my initial read, and considering Zack has referred to it on twitter in the past as one of their favorite jokes it's definitely not been forgotten about.

Second, the sheer amounts of near-misses, jokey or not, of Spender narrowly avoiding specifically lightning

Again, not much, but it's weird that it happened thrice, latter two of which had real gravitas rather than an one-off joke.

And third, Spender himself. He's repeatedly shown himself to be kind of a self sacrificing idiot, as well as prideful to a fault. Granted, it's both him and Mina trying to take on all the responsibility of saving Mayview and its inhabitants from their fate.. But Spender is exactly that right measure of doesn't-value-himself-enough (chest footprint aftercare or lack thereof), having an obscene amount of power (enables his loner act + pride) and poor judgement that has the capacity to put him at great risk. And it has!

Spender has not only shown low enough self-esteem to view himself as the de-facto scapegoat for the safety of the town, but also prideful enough to make very bad calls that end up in people, often himself, hurt (COUGH FORGE INCIDENT COUGH)

This is all conjecture, but it's definitely enough to make me worried about him :') Even if all this doesn't mean he'll necessarily die he's definitely getting (even more) seriously injured at some point. I love the guy but he's so far doing a horrible job of convincing me he wants to live bad enough to circumvent at least that

[revryebread]

wild wild west

The door opens with a slam, and one of Bruce’s animatronics- Stuart- was in the door way, holding it’s leaking side. “Sheriff Wayne! There’s been- The Una Gang- they’re here, and they’re breaking people outta the jail!” It’s voice comes strained from behind it’s porcelain face, the gears in it’s voice box struggling to run on less fuel. 

It gets it’s message out, and it collapses onto the floor- a oily handprint smearing from the doorframe as it slumps into a pile of metal, the gears grinding to a halt. Bruce Wayne gets up and tries to level his emotions. He’d been prepared for this. He’d put away so many other problem citizens in his time, Trish Una and her crew would fall just like the rest. His hand is shaking when he grips the brim of his hat, and settles by the time it goes over his head. The title is something he hides behind. Bruce can be scared, but Sheriff Wayne has to be strong, else the people of this town would be helpless.

There’s a part of him who reminds him how he got this job, and who he was before he had the hat and gun, but he shakes it off. No time for second guessing now.

He moves to the doorway and kneels down to pick the badge off the deputy in the doorway, and pulls up his mask as he moves out into the sun. As soon as he steps into the heat of day, he can hear it- the sound of people yelling, the sounds of chaos and disorder. He narrows his eyes and begins to slowly walk towards the other end of the street where the prison is. He had taken over the old Saloon and repurposed it once the jails were full, and then next came the general store, and eventually an entire block of the town had been quarantined as a prison for people he’d found guilty.

A troublesome individual with a book was the first one who was running his way, quickly spotting Sheriff Wayne and trying to go for his book at his side. He was met with the business end of a gun, hitting him in the shoulder that was bending to reach for the book. He looked to him and tried to speak, but the words couldn’t cut through to the Sheriff, he had moved on to the next prisoner escaping, trying to scan for Una.

And there she was- standing at the stables with her crew. Two of them up astride the horses looking down. “What are you doing? People are going to get killed.” the voice he uses for the Sheriff is booming- deeper than his normal cadence. It’s an attempt to make himself more intimidating, and it usually works, but not for her.

She pushes away from her crew- the dark haired boy looks to the Sheriff and- it gives him a stop. He’s looking at him like he’s already a corpse, and he looks pitying about it. Like he’s never seen something more destined to happen. Trish pushes past people on her walk over, and the boy whispers with a voice that Bruce can almost hear- “You need to run.”

“How long?” Trish shouts over the crowd, and it parts for her, as if a ravine was cut from her to the Sheriff. “How long have you been in charge?”

The question is absurd to him- but he answers. “Four years. I’ve been here four years “ The weight of tose years sit on him- but he’s done the best he can in that time. There is so much evil in this world and he’s just one man. He says as much, but Trish narrows her eyes. She’s not listening anymore.

She asks him another question- a non-sequitor. “What sound does a train make?”

“What the hell are you talking about? Look- just help me get everyone under control here and you and your friends can walk free. Just stop wha-”

A gunshot cuts him off. His eyes dart down to the growing red on his chest, and then back over to Trish, who was holding her signature revolver, with a rose gold inlay to give it that pink sheen. She fires again, and again, and again- and when she empties that one she reaches to her other holster and pulls out a reddish gun that has had whatever inscriptions and markings shaved clean by a nail file. She unloads all 12 bullets into Bruce and flips the cylinder out, letting the empty casings drop to the ground.

He’s frozen in place, slowly falling backwards. He sees the boy with the bowlcut reach to the girl and the two of them share a nod, and leave on horse back in separate directions like they’re the only things moving at a normal speed. Trish turns her head and sees that they’ve left- beginning to run back through the crowd to her other crew member who’s still standing there. Her last crew member.

He hits the ground and sees the sky- letting his last breath out of his lungs. He sees a woman step over him and reach down to grab his hat off his body- the hat that used to be hers.

[strawberrybyers]

convinced that when mike and will both tell each other about how “it’s been a year, mike!” and “the truth is is the last year has been weird” isn’t in the context of talking only about the byers move to california. considering the byers haven’t lived in california for a year, then obviously they aren’t only talking about the move. you know what has been going on for a year though? mike and el dating.

mike and el started dating in season 2 at the snowball dance in december of 1984 and we catch up with their relationship in season 4 in march of 1986. this is when mike and will both bring up how the last year has been weird and they have felt disconnected from each other. i know we have theories on time being weird and everything, but i don’t think the use of the word “year” is to hint at a screwed up timeline, but to hint that el and mike’s relationship for the past year has been a problem between mike and will’s friendship and the relationship they have with themselves. they’re both feeling disconnected from each other and in season 3, their rain fight literally shows how el begins to get in between them.

it would make sense for will to feel like mike hasn’t been as connected to him as before because in season 3 he literally expresses that in their argument! will just wants to play d&d and have his friend pay attention to him, but mike is too focused on el. mike then mentions in season 4 when they’re talking that he was “too focused on el” and relates that as a contribution as to why things have been weird between him and will. i say that throughout the past year for mike he feels it’s been weird not only because within that space of time will moved, but because he realizes that he is in fact in love with will, or at least acknowledges that what he feels for will is not what he feels for el. this explains why he wouldn’t really call or write to will, but spent most of his time writing el because that was a way for him to convince himself that he is attracted to el. hence why when will questions mike on him not writing him, mike’s immediate defense is “we’re friends. we’re friends”. just like when will calls out mike on not being a good friend and only focusing on el, mike hits him with the “it’s not my fault you don’t like girls”. like bro, your responses have absolutely nothing to do with what will is trying to communicate to you!! anyways, the problem now is that el catches on to how he actually feels because he writes “from, mike” instead of “love, mike”. he then can’t even defend why he does it except for telling el she’s “ridiculous” and that “mouth breathers” are the problem. once again, mike is not addressing the issue at hand.

so yeah, mike and will express that their relationship has been disconnected and weird for a year, not because of only the move to california, but because mike being in love with will while dating el is not working for him and el, therefore, his actions then affect will and their friendship.

[ego-osbourne]

Iren Remaster

Rakell is there too <33 Hunkified! Iren was the one to make him a bunk - consider this early on in their relationship

I’d been meaning to take another stab at Iren’s design, and I finally got around to it. It’s been a while! Made him chubbier, switched his primary colors from orange to pink, and made him a bit fancier over all. A lot of his new design aspects are darker in general, too.

I’ve also updated his lore since the last time I posted anything big about him. Under the cut! (Warning for general mention of c.annibalism, attempted assisted s.uicide [unsuccessful])

The climate of Valenwood at the time was in a recover stage after freeing themselves from the tyranny of the Camoran Usurper. Following his death, Valenwood saw a resurgence in tradition to oppose the previous forces they were ruled under. The Green Pact saw more popularity than it had in the last few centuries.

This is what Iren was born into. He grew up in a newly-liberated Valenwood, enjoying a cozy family life where he and his relatives followed the code of the Green Pact. Iren grew to be a troublemaker, though, and was scorned by his family. Ostracized, he left Valenwood and sought a new life in Cyrodiil.

For context, the rules of the Green Pact consist of this: 1) Harm no plant life; 2) Eat no plant life unless it has naturally fallen; 3) Let no felling of any creature go to waste; 4) Do not take on the shape of beasts; 5) Do not kill wastefully.

When regarding these rules, Iren had a lot of trouble adjusting to life in Cyrodiil. He was a staunch Pact Bosmer, among the few who cared even for the grass they stepped upon (Iren would wear shoes with healing enchantments on the soles, so that any grass he stepped on and harmed would be immediately restored). He considered all plant life sacred, not just the forest of Valenwood. He originally would not enter buildings made of/with wood if he did not know that it was rightfully obtained. Meat was far more expensive to buy in Cyrodiil than it was in Valenwood, and he always seemed to be low on money.

To remedy this issue, and already familiar with some areas of trouble, Iren found himself in the Green Accordance Affiliation. On the surface, the Affiliation appeared as a state-run pseudo-charity, promoting religious inclusion by raising funds and providing jobs for Pact Bosmer so that they may more easily carry out the Green Pact within Cyrodiil. In actuality, the Affiliation employed Pact Bosmer to get their hands dirty and breach county lines to settle disputes, most often through murder. These Pact Bosmer were most desired due to the Green Pact demanding they eat the bodies of their fallen enemies, and, so, there would be very little evidence left of the targets to trace back to the officials who had ordered them.

Iren did not miss the opportunity that the Affiliation gave, being reeled in on the promise that he was “cleaning up” Cyrodiil of the serial murderers and deviants that plagued it, and was eventually desensitized to the prospect of killing whoever his employers told him to, morally justified or not.

As Iren entered his autumn years, he found very little fulfillment in the Affiliation. Religious torment ate at him, as he knew had had been unknowingly and knowingly disobeying the “do not kill wastefully” rule. Moral torment gripped him, too, as he slowly realized there was no redemption for himself.

The Association was difficult to leave, however, due to its illegitimacy. The officials who backed it were paranoid of catching heat, and so threatened the Bosmer that they employed with torture and death if they were to ever speak about the Association or abandon it.

Iren spent many years in hiding. He had used the money he’d earned to make a cozy home in the Great Forest, and eventually sought a means of dying early. Finding a dremora (some years before the Oblivion Crisis), Iren taunted him into a game of cat and mouse with the ultimate goal being suicide in the end.

That end did not arrive. This dremora was Rakell, a Deadlands kynmarcher who had just left his post to enjoy the last few years Nirn had left to offer, as his Prince had plans for a great invasion in the coming future. Iren and Rakel grew to be fast friends, intrigued by one another’s lives, and Iren figured he might try and find one last sense of purpose in the few years remaining.

Iren could not seem to stay away from shadows, however. His self-loathing grew the more he remained within the peaceful life, and so, he sought distraction within the Dark Brotherhood. The DBH doubled as protection against the Affiliation, but would prove to be a point of major contention, anguish, and depression for Iren for as long as he remained within it.

And that’s what I plan to make a mini-fic about between The Dez Illusion and Mortal Intentions ;]

[micechicken]

"You look an awful lot like your mother. I hope you're nothing like her."

Myrtle's mother Mystira, often nicknamed Myst.

She was the soul mate to the King of Rudor, Leroy. She was not born royal, but that has never been something that was looked down on in regards to becoming royal. Myst was born in a small village that was secluded from the rest of the kingdom, known as Brindlefell. It's the only place in all of Rudor that ever speaks about the Malterns and magic as speaking about it is considered forbidden by law due to the nature of the departure of the Malterns. This became so true that it as almost completely forgotten outside of Brindlefell save for stories about magic that seemed to have vanished one day.

Leroy longed to marry his soulmate whoever they may be, something shared by many but not all, as a soulmate is one who best connects to you in someway, and is personally picked by Selene. He actually even sent out for finding the one who received the same markings he made (as any intentional marking you make on your body will magically appear on the same place on your soulmate). After discovering her he was smitten and they quickly wed as soon as they could.

Though she knew such things were forbidden, she admitted the truth about keeping the history of the Malterns, hoping that her soulmate must understand. But he quickly forbid any more talks of them, and that it was for the better.

After the birth of Myrtle, Myst often told stories to her daughter even before she could fully understand. It was under the guise of fairytales and myths but they were all related to the Malterns and the magic that once was present in the land and the history of Rudor. After telling the stories she'd write them down and draw out pictures of things so that Myrtle could read them whenever. Myrtle still preferred to hear her mother tell the stories.

This was all in secret with only the 3 family members being aware of the stories. But sometimes there would be slip ups and word got around about the queen speaking about magic and Malterns. Claiming that his wife must have lost her mind, Leroy had her locked up in a personal cell. Begrudgingly he allowed Myrtle to visit her mother as he was concerned how disallowing it may affect her. Anytime Myrtle ever spoke up about anything from the stories he scolded her for focusing on "fiction" and to keep in mind she'd be queen one day.

Even despite being locked up Myst still kept telling stories and even made up some. Often crying and lamenting her reality between visits from others. At times she'd write messages to Leroy on her body so he'd see them, which he often ignored.

Almost to Myrtle's birthday Myst became very ill with something very unknown, thought to be native to Brindlefell as that's the only location known to have it. But it had no cure. Despite all efforts of the royal help and medical staff, she grew sicker. On Myrtle's birthday she got to preform her coming of age ceremony and discovered her wolf form. Unfortunately it was also the night her mother past away, leaving Myrtle with just the book her mother created left to her.

Myrtle continued to view them as just stories until she met Nym.

Mystira's shifted form was also a Wolf. Leroy's is a peafowl.

[expatesque]

Well ladies (gn), it might have been unexpected but funemployment isn't starting off too bad.

[ikaishere]

so, about the hyrule and legend modern!au meetup story...... its the stupidest thing I ever came up with, so proud of myself. have a short drabble!

"No, but Wild, he is a total creep though! Wait, hold on. I will call you back in a sec."

There he was again. The same customer that has been coming to this godforsaken gas station, that Hyrule worked at, to get hot dogs in the middle of the night, on random days, for the past four months.  At this point, he could count this person as one of the very few constants in his life. Every week he was sure the sun would still be shining, Karens would scream at his coworkers, and the hotdog customer would never fail to appear.

He didn't even know their name! All he knew about them was their appearance, the sauce they always chose, and a person named "Ravio" they would sometimes be on the phone with. Of all the weird things he would expect, he certainly did not expect the parasocial attachment to the hotdog customer (supposedly, that was their name now…). If he focused too much on it, he would probably understand he would actually get worried if a week would pass and the person would not show up. But now it was not the time to focus on it. Now he had a customer. “Hello, what can I help you with?” He mumbled his usual greetings, a little less cheerful than usual. It was past midnight, after all. Instead of a “Hi” or even a “Good night”, a pack of baby diapers was put on the counter. Who the heck buys baby diapers, at a gas station in the middle of nowhere, at midnight- Of course the fucking hotdog customer. Of course, it was them. “Uh- the usual to go with it?” Hyrule asked, a bit awkwardly. They looked a bit too young to be having a kid, but then who was he to judge it? It did not even have to be their kid. “The usual?” They asked as if it was the weirdest thing they’d ever asked. “What do you mean, the usual?” “The usual you buy here at least once a week since… 4 months?” Hyrule raised an eyebrow, resisting the urge to giggle silently. They looked so lost. “I mean- yeah. The usual. Thank you.” They smiled fondly, looking around at whatever the store had to offer. “Do you maybe have painkillers? Or like- a chocolate?”

“That’s a… weird variety.” Hyrule giggled, finally.

“Hey! I wanted to be a good boyfriend. Painkillers will be useful, and I mean, chocolate would cheer me up if id menstruate. I think”

“Wait. Menstruate- are you buying baby diapers for a menstruating person?” There it was, the breaking point. He burst out laughing, behind the counter of a gas station store, in front of a random stranger - or well, not random. The hotdog customer.

“What? No! I-” the person looked over the counter, blushing almost immediately. “Fuck. Do you have sanitary pads as well, then? Stop laughing!”

“I’m sorry, I’m- oh my god, if my manager saw that, I’d be so fired-” Hyrule finally calmed down a little, getting all three things they asked for from the shelves, and scanning them when he was back at his place. “You just- you come in here, at goddess forbidden hours, only to buy a hotdog. And now you- Apologies. I’m done.”

“No- you are right. That’s fucking weird.” they laughed quietly as well “I just always came here after work, and there are days when I work over hours, so, yeah. And now my partner asked me to get him pads, and god damn, that looks like I'm a guy who has never seen sanitary products- it’s not like that, promise.”

“Hey! Not judging, I get it. Kind of you to think abut ways to make them comfortable. It’s the thought that matter.” his voice went soft, as he was still preparing the goddess-damned hotdog. For a while silence filled the room in between them, but all of the sudden, it seemed like courage struck both of them at the very same moment.

“What’s your name?” they both asked at the same time, laughing loudly as their eyes locked together.

That began a beautiful friendship, as they would later learn. Even if Legend would ever deny that he mistook baby diapers for sanitary pads, and even if Hyrule claimed it was several hours later than it actually happened.