#IM SHITTING MY FUCKING SELF FOR REAL
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
RVB NATION HOW THE FUCK ARE WE FEELING RIGHT NOW??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?>!!<!?!?!>!>?!?!!?!?!?!?
#rvb#red vs blue#rvb restoration#WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK#IM SHITTING MYSELF#IM SHITTING MY FUCKING SELF FOR REAL#IM SCREAMING IM YELLING IM DESTROYING THE FURNITURE IM EATING THE WALLS IM EXPLODING#RVB HAS BEEN MY INTEREST FOR LIEK 8 YEARS#THEY BROUGHT BACK BURNIE?!??!?!!#IM GOING TO END IT#IM GOING TO END IT ALL DONT TEST ME#I NEED TO BE SEDATED IM FOAMING IM .#OAAADGFHGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK#IM SO FUCKING EXCITED???#I DIDN'T THINK IT WAS GOING TO GET A PROPER FUCKING ENDING.#I DIDN'T... I DIDN'T#BUT NOW I HAVE SOME FAITH AND I WANT TO CRRYYYY#DONT EVEN FUCKING TOUCH ME#ANY SEED OF RVB CONTENT RN .... MIRACLES
317 notes
·
View notes
Text
mmmmmm read a disciple shen yuan/shizun luo binghe fanfic about two days ago where the first chapter was the Immortal Conference arc, and SQQ was the one who had to be pushed into the abyss (he was still the villain) except Luo Binghe was refusing and was like, lowkey losing his mind about SQQ being so close to the edge. SQQ ended up having to be the one to fall in himself because of the system's punishment system. The rest of the fic is leading up to that moment. But like, MMM i've been obsessively thinking about that first chapter for DAYS ever since.
now i've been in svsss for a grand total of *checks watch* a week. but god obsessed with that. I want to write/read a fic where disciple SQQ goes a little nuts down there. Like keep all of the things that make SQQ, SQQ, but just. Throw in a little bit more trauma in there. A little bit of a mental break. Let him go a little nuts as a treat. Just a tad unhinged. I wanna see him go, just a little, "god fuck it, i've tried so hard to change this shitty story's outcome and it feels like everything i've done has been for nothing. I'm going to die in this world no matter what I do, I've been doomed from the start, so might as well die the way I want to." and he just, breaks a little! Under all the stress.
He still retains the traits that makes shen yuan, shen yuan, like his overwhelming kindness. But he's just! yk. A little less patient. Paranoid. Jumpy. Colder. A little more aloof and closed off. A little more Shen Jiu. He's no asshole child abuser, but he was a Number One Hater in his past life and he's leaning into that old habit a little more now.
(On a totally coincidental not-at-all related note, there's not enough SJ-and-SY-are-the-same-people fics out there that i've found. This is totally unrelated...)
The Endless Abyss turns the mind into an over-sharpened blade, and SQQ is both fascinated and perhaps a little excited to explore a place that doesn't have a lot of info on it in the mortal realm, but still terrified out of his mind. And he's no Luo Binghe, he doesn't have the sheer brute strength and power to just bulldoze his way through, so he has to be a lot more sneaky and cunning if he wants to survive.
The fic itself role-swapped LBH and SQQ so that SQQ was the half-demon (which lowkey fucks) and LBH the human, but I'm equally-if-not-more obsessed with the idea that LBH remains the half-heavenly demon and SQQ the human. If only because I keep thinking about SQQ befriending some demons (particularly and specifically a group of succubi) and they grow very attached to this Human Cultivator so through magic plot stuff they create some kind of seal/illusion/talisman that makes SQQ appear as a demon because a human cultivator in the endless abyss may as well be the equivalent of putting a giant neon target on your back.
And iirc Shen Jiu was taught demonic cultivation by that one guy(?? i've only been here a week so im not caught up in ALL of the lore yet) so that could totally happen here.
(On the other end of the realms, poor Shizun Luo Binghe is just. losing his fucking mind over losing his most precious and beloved disciple. About .5 seconds from burning down the peaks himself. somebody sedate him.)
The Endless Abyss sucks and SQQ is having a really terrible time and can feel himself going lowkey mad, but also holy shit look at all this WORLD-BUILDING. look at all this flora and fauna, and oh if he had the equipment for it he'd be writing all of this down. ALL OF IT. He was kinda-sorta-already planning on never leaving the Abyss as some sort of fucked up self-exile and self-preservation thing, but now he might? actually just?? never leave if he can help it, like he lowkey likes it down here.
anyways the next time anyone ever sees SQQ again he's got hair so long its almost touching the ground and he's either in rags and half-feral or he's been completely dolled up by his adoptive succubi sisters and still about three seconds from biting anyone who tries to touch him. (he's also lowkey trying to book it back down to the abyss even if he has desperately missed all of his friends and shizun)
#mxtx svsss#svsss au#scum villian self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#luo binghe#disciple shen yuan#scum villain#svsss#*points at SQQ/SY* i want him to go nuts. as a treat. let him crumble just a little over the stress of his fate and the stress of survival#and the stress of having a lack of autonomy over a handful of his decisions. starry craves angst and she craves a very specific SQQ angst#he was a number 1 hater back in the day and lbr being a hater takes energyyyy. ive heard that this man was the BIGGEST hater i wanna#see him rip a man to shreds with nothing but his tongue and a voice that could cut marble clean in half. skin a man alive sqq you deserve i#*mortal kombat voice* FINISH HIM#i love without-a-cure but unfortunately i dont think SQQ would be able to have WAC and also survive in the abyss.#the succubi nest that adopted him tried seducing him at first. it didn't work. but he did somehow charm them with his cringefail ways#so now they have a brand new mortal big/little brother to dote on. SQQ is frankly delighted to learn all about succubi culture that doesnt#revolve around sex. he makes quite a few friends/allies in the abyss because of his pure fascination and unbiased desire to learn about#demonic culture and all the different niches and nuances of it across species. he's still going insane tho. like that's not stopping.#there's a single LBH pov chapter in the fic and its frankly so unhinged it was fantastic. he's so possessive. he straight up goes:#'oh SQQ isnt gonna be the next peak lord. he's ascending to heaven with me when i do :)' when Sha Hualing (also peak lord) told him that he#couldn't keep his disciple in the bamboo house all the time. what was SQQ gonna do when LBH ascends and he becomes the new peak lord?#gosh that first chapter is rotating around in my mind so bad. LBH was SO unwell. like losing his actual shit over SQQ near the edge.#i so want to write a oneshot abt this where SQQ is also in hysterics (albeit over slightly diff reasons) and tells LBH on his knees:#'this disciple deeply apologizes to his shizun. for he will not be ascending to the heavens with him.' right before he falls into the abyss#this au being disciple SY is for shits and giggles but i can also see it happening for regular SQQ bc 'fuck it im a dead man either way'#frothing at the mouth at this idea also being a SY-is-SJ au too. for the extra angst of SQQ trying to bear the weight of multiple lives on#his shoulders and trying to figure out what is real and what isn't and if he's meant to suffer in all of his lives no matter what he does.#not once in his life has he ever been free to do what he likes has he? self-hatred to the max. he's going mad. poor boy :]
284 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ermm...What the flip is a "Will Wood?"
Awhile ago I made a Will Wood LEGO set in the program Studio 2.0 based off his album "In Case I make it," and just never posted it anywhere. Contains a bunch of references to his songs, his albums, those tapeworms that he has, stuff he has worked on with other people, etc. Some of the character's are based off preexisting stuff while others is more original I guess. Still not the best with captions cuz I got nothing else lmao
More photos below!!!
Some dark lighting here. This is how it's supposed to look but when I showed this to my friend they said the images were too dark and like fair it is pretty dark so I made a bunch of more renders but with brighter lighting so you can see better
Ahh! so bright!! so so bright!!!
I'd probably make some changes to this like changing the designs of some of the figures and maybe add other designs but I don't got it in me to rerender everything so oh well it is what it is lol
Can you guess the references? First person to name all of them wins a photo of a scary monster!!!! ahhhh!!!! so scary!!!!!!!!!
Okay here's the answers lol
I feel like i complained a lot in the caption of this post but I actually do love how this came out and I really enjoyed doing all the fancy posing for all the figures and I really want to do more stuff like that
(and I already did get ready I got more of this stuff lmao)
For a lot of the character's I had trouble finding good parts that actually matched with the design so some of them are just real wonky looking. Part of me sorta wishes I made an original design for SELF-ISH but at the same time I think just having the actual art from the cover being placed on top of a LEGO dude is really funny.
like look at this shit lmao
I'm probably going to make a followup to this post showing off like the 800 wip renders I did of this anyways follow for 800 reblogs of random ass shit and NOTHING ELSE
#shit what was my art tag FUCK#EvilYodaArtCool#I remembered it yippee#Will Wood#wwattw#lego#will wood and the tapeworms#camp here and there#oh god is there a tag limit#cuz im bout to fuck shit up here#Everything is a lot#SELF-ish#self ish#the normal album#in case i make it#in case i DIE#a verbal equinox#jamface#big day for the jamface community#the real will wood#insert tag for obscure band that only like 5 people know and would require me to commit horrible atrocities for me to even know about#shit someone give me more tags
495 notes
·
View notes
Text
WE'RE GETTING EVICTED FROM OUR APARTMENT.
#ok yeah not the best news to suddenly reappear on after almost a month of radio silence#but a shit ton has been happening lately its fucking wild#i had to call the ambulance for my mom :[ DW she's ok !!! just some stomach problems#i went to the club the like last last week ish ?? it was.. okay i wish my friends werent super self concious#abt dancing bc damn it was kinda boring.... almost just stood there for 5 ish hours#got plastered the other day at a friends house too#and we stayed up and watched the whole entire cars franchise and this is probably my biggest hear me out yet...#lightning mcqueen.#LIKE NOT THE FUCKING CAR OK LIKE IF HE WERE A REAL GUY HE WOULD B HOT#......yes its owen wilsons voice yeah ok i get it yeah. shut. shut it. SHUT UP.#anyway cars 1 is a classic a masterpiece muah muah cars 2 is abysmal and cars 3 is pretty good#ALSO I MISSED LESBIAN VISIBILITY WEEK I AM DEVASTATED WHAT DO I DO I FAILED YOU LESBIANS IM SO SORRY........#the karmic debt from me missing it will curse me somehow..........#anyway yeah we r getting evicted i think idk so were apartment hunting and its so difficult everything is so expensive :']]]]#landlords r actually the spawn of satan#thats it for the update ill doodle smthn maybe i dunno zzzz#frambling...?
80 notes
·
View notes
Text
here's something no one asked for, my ocs when they were a bit younger! :] (more like how they were in highschool lmfao) ((not aster tho sorry my king. u did not have a highschool.))
as always, close ups and more info under the cut!! OH and i put an updated relationship chart at the very end!! it's in writing this time because i thought that would be easier (it's long.) </3 i am so sorry in advance there's a lot under this HAHA
lune:
lune was a little shit, he's very rebellious now but he was even more rebellious when he was a teenager lmfao
he would CONSTANTLY get into fights, anyone that pissed him off he did not hesitate to attack
his relationship with his parents was already bad but it quickly deteriorated at this point in time
he was relatively popular in school but uh, everyone stayed away from him or tried to be on his good side because... well yk! didn't wanna get attacked..?
also people thought he was annoying but hey at least he was good looking!
he did not know he was popular btw. like at all, no idea, still doesn't know
his grades were like... okay, not great, but not bad, and he would skip class a lot... dumbass
his nails were constantly painted different colours bc cecilia would do them often, he was also never seen without a bracelet on his right wrist
huge troublemaker (some things never change!)
he hasn't really changed since then lmao
cecilia:
she was a bit more reserved back in highschool, still nice and friendly but she had a hard time approaching others because she was nervous (and others found her a bit intimidating cause she didn't smile much) ((and she's related to lune and that guy was known for being crazy))
her and lune were known as "those rich twins"
was constantly stressing over lune because of how much he got in trouble it's not like their parents would do anything about it.
kept her hair long and undyed! she liked doing different things with her hair and would try out diffy styles a lot of the time
she liked having long hair, and randomly cut it off impulsively lmfao (3 am on a school night, she couldn't sleep and was like ok why not)
good student, wasn't always at school but she was doing well
hated going to school, couldn't tell you why, just hated it
she was really awkward as a teen, but she was trying her best
always had bracelets on, if you saw her she had a bunch on her left hand, and then just one on her right.
always had her nails done (she did them herself ^^)
would always carry a few hair ties on her in case any one needed to tie their hair
one time she tried to be cool and approached a girl who didn't have a hair tie and just dropped it in her hands and walked away (she then walked out of class bc she felt embarrassed)
she tried out a lot of different clothing styles
nox:
so, he still had a shitty sleep schedule!
hard to find, he was always somewhere, no one knew where tho
good student, did not give two shits about school though
not very memorable? he was quiet and would leave as soon as he could
every time there was a group project he would ask the teacher to work alone
didn't have any friends.
his classmates were kinda scared of him lol
would braid his hair a lot
had blue on him at all times, there will ALWAYS be blue in his outfits, whether it’s the shirt, pants, or a hair tie, he always had SOMETHING blue on him (this applies now too)
no one really knew much about him, and he liked keeping it that way
fuckass edgelord (kinda)
he was always like 5 minutes late to his first class (there was a cat that would wander around in front of the school and... he couldn't resist)
he would go see that cat every day btw. before and after school, he would also go eat lunch outside so he could see the cat (and he always brought something for it too!)
loser
cassian:
very social! had a lot of friends and was very outgoing
always doodling in class
he was rather popular! and well i guess some people didn't like that
he was known as the rich kid but people were always giving him things because he was super sweet HAHA
a really bright and helpful guy
he was usually seen with a smile on his face
it's a shame how things turned out, hm?
he would bring his shoujo manga to class and just read that (he was always sitting at the back of the classroom bc he was tall so the teachers didn't really pay attention to what he was doing)
and in the rare chance his teachers saw him doing something other than classwork they would mostly let it slide, he's a good kid, so it's fine (favouritism.)
lowkey the typical popular shoujo manga male lead (wow! just like he wanted!)
really good student too, always on top of his stuff
he had these sword earrings that he really liked, he used to wear them a lot!
always wore darker and muted colours, and liked more comfortable clothing
no one said anything but they really missed him after he left, maybe if someone helped him, things would've been different
rowan:
was completely different when he was younger
always angry, or sad, no one really knew what he looked like when he smiled
no one knew what was going on with him
but he was quiet, and didn't talk to many people, he wasn't a mean or scary kid, but people were still intimidated by him
his hair was longer and uneven, it looked like he had cut random bits and pieces
he was smart but wasn't doing so well in school
it always looked like something was stressing him out
he would stay behind after school
tense and uneasy most of the time
hair super healthy tho LMFAO (his mom would oil his hair regularly!)
he was completely different around his mom though, his source of comfort
if anyone from highschool saw him now they'd think he was a completely different person (in terms of personality, since he looks... pretty much the same)
although, in the last few months of highschool, his demeanor had changed for the better, he didn't smile much still but he looked a lot more relaxed and calm
aster: (his stuff is different because he didn't have school in his world lmfao. but here's how he was as a teenager and some other info about him!)
his hair was reallyyyyyyy long when he was still in his world (you end up cutting his hair when he came here lmfao)
he was really lonely because he was the only elf in his world and he had no company whatsoever
he ended up collecting a lot of things because he would wander around a LOT
dora the explorer has nothing on him bro
he was (and is) very curious about things, he really likes to learn
he somehow learned how to braid his own hair, would spend a lot of time doing that when he was bored
he has a horrible sense of fashion, you took him shopping once and he picked out the worst fucking outfits in existence, you're basically his personal stylist cause what the hell
he likes when you dress him up though teehee
he originally saw you in a mirror he found when wandering in the forest
he became really really curious about you and accidentally yanked you to him
he was confused but really happy
blah blah blah you end up living together, we all know the story! (if you don't, you suggested he followed you because you felt bad for him cause he was PAINFULLY lonely)
you took it upon yourself to cut his hair because it was REALLY long when you first met him, he likes having his hair long though, mourned the loss of his two front strands (he will be growing them back.)
he didn't talk to you for a few days after you cut his hair for the first time, wasn't your fault... you accidentally cut off one of the front strands and had to cut the other off to make it even
fun fact about him, his eyes glow in the dark, it can be scary at times.
oh and his ears are expressive, dunno how that works but it does! and he also never goes a day without wearing earrings! he prefers the ones he came with but doesn't mind wearing whatever as long as he has earrings haha
now for the updated relationship chart! (this whole post has been about them from a few years ago but this is their current relationships with each other!)
ROWAN -> LUNE: he’s a weirdo but i’m glad we’re friends, i can handle his craziness more than most people… probably, i’d say he’s like a brother to me, but at the same time i’d probably lose my mind if he was my brother. no idea how cecilia does it
LUNE -> ROWAN: somehow he’s gotten used to me, he’s not so bad, i guess i’d call him a friend
ROWAN -> CECILIA: she’s like a little sister to me! cute! we’re good friends :] i met her through lune, they’re close! we’re like siblings the three of us
CECILIA -> ROWAN: reliable and nice! i wonder how he’s friends with lune. also. we’re the same age?? he’s real sweet tho, and he’s kind of like a big dog? haha
ROWAN -> NOX: who? :D
NOX -> ROWAN: i’ve seen him before (around the twins) he’s close to cecilia and that other guy who she's unfortunately related to
LUNE -> CECILIA: my little sister <3 we are best buddies, i’d do anything for her, she was there with me in our hardest moments, i wouldn’t let anyone hurt her, and she wouldn’t let anyone hurt me, one of the only people i’ll listen to lmao (she’s kinda scary when she’s mad at me but it’s also kinda funny?) i like bothering her but she might kill me one day though. she hides herself a lot, i don’t know why, it’s always been like this. i wonder if it’s because of me..?
CECILIA -> LUNE: dawg you’re like two minutes older than me (won’t deny the best buddies comment) he’s a really good brother though… but tough to deal with, he’s always causing some sort of trouble, but uh, well. anyway, we’re basically best friends… his words, not mine (she’s lying) he’s crazy but he’s not a bad person..? <- would defend him with her life. he’s an interesting fella that’s for sure, i’ve known him my whole life but there’s always something new with him lmfao. sometimes he comes into my room to knock something over and then he leaves, what an odd guy.
LUNE -> NOX: cocky asshole. so annoying. go to hell already. and stay away from my sister, i don't want you plaguing her with your presence.
NOX -> LUNE: fuck you insane bastard, go die.
CECILIA -> NOX: he’s pretty sweet (??????) we’re really great friends! i didn't think we would become such good friends tbh, he didn't seem to be the social type, and i'm not very social either haha... we're pretty similar i think! i can't remember who approached who first but that's fine. also, this guy has one of the worst damn sleep schedules known to man, i worry for that man. also, him and lune hate each other, no idea why.
NOX -> CECILIA: she's a close friend, i don't usually like making friends cause they end up thinking i'm weird, i don't really care about that but... i'll admit, it's nice to have a friend. she acts really differently in front of other people than she does with me, i don't think she's realized though? it's like having a cat open up to you haha, so i won't say anything. i hate her brother though, pretentious dickhead.
CASSIAN -> CECILIA: we were kids when i met her and her brother? she’s nice… and a lot like me… we still talk, she’s a good friend, thanks for keeping me company… and thanks for not asking me too many questions either
CECILIA -> CASSIAN: oh! cass is a childhood friend! we met at some event, he’s changed a lot since then, but i guess we’re more alike now? he doesn’t come out of his house much anymore, but we still text often. sometimes i see him online really late... bro... please get some sleep.... anyway, i never got to know what happened with him, and he doesn't like talking about it either, i won't pry though, because i understand.
CASSIAN -> LUNE: he’s scary, but i guess he’s not that bad..? i talk to him too, we’re not the closest, but he’s still a friend, i text him sometimes, he’s crazier than before, he was fun to hang out with when we were young, not that i don't like him anymore, he's definitely... special
LUNE -> CASSIAN: i don’t know what happened to him, but he doesn’t leave the house anymore, he’s not bad. he texts sometimes, i don’t know why because i think he’s scared of me, no idea why tho (???) i guess he’s a childhood friend? him, ceci, and i used to hang out before… well yeah, still don't know what went down
CASSIAN -> NOX: oh… i’ve never met him. cecilia’s told me about him before, lune’s mentioned him once, they have really different opinions about him
NOX -> CASSIAN: no clue, cecilia’s mentioned him before, i think he’s friends with her and… the other one.
CASSIAN -> ROWAN: another one of lune and cecilia’s friends i think? they sure are popular. (even lune???) i dont know anything about him though
ROWAN -> CASSIAN: no idea who this guy is!
ASTER: ??? :’D
#num draws#aster posting#cassian posting#cecilia posting#lune posting#nox posting#rowan posting#yanderes#male yandere#yandere oc#yandere male#still not tagging female yandere bc im still unsure. loser. (me i mean)#oc art#digital art#yandere#original character#good lord i fucking yapped for forever.#also i feel like i said a lot of confusing shit so apologies lmfao#and im forgetting half of the stuff i wanted to write so i might add to this later </3#btw i thought the wording was confusing so im clarifying. with nox n ceci. i meant that cecilia doesn't realize that she's acting like her#real self with nox. but he's noticed cause he's just silly like that or whatever#the besties fr#i spent at least two hours trying to do all the writing for this post. not to mention that the drawings took 13 hours. i had fun tho lmfao#literally no one asked for this but me. and this is my blog so im gonna do as i please /lh /hj#wont lie i was drawing some of these and i liked these better than their current designs but that's probably bc i liked the way i drew it#...will admit i like aster's hair here more than i do normally so uh. yeah!#also rowan looks wonky as hell im sorry.#anyway if this was confusing and you have questions please feel free to ask i dont mind clearing things up </3#i know it's a lot of yapping im so so sorry </3
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
oh [tumblr dashboard] im just feeling real low
#me when I vent in tags rn =^_^=#i could draw things that matter but im not good enough for it.gh#i keep putting off ideas i want todo bc i want to be Good when i do them but as a result i make like. super derivative stuff#who give a fuck if its derivative etc etc what if I give a fuck#thr people need to know that i have thoughts !! about characters !! and sometimes theyre awesome#but also are they even. etc#ill be fully so real i hate feeling like i dont know anything#n i think i end up like. self fulfilling prophecy etc etc#tldr feel like my arts shit and whatever js behind it is shit. shrug#birbwellspeaks
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
(Realizes that the most common transman experiences perfectly align with my life and feelings about myself and fascinations and who I want to be with) Ohhhh Okay i am fucked
#I do really wish i could just snap my fingers and pilot a cisman's body around#Rather than go through the crucible of visibly transitioning. it seems like a waste to do it when the times are so awful.#I honestly still doubt myself so much but#I can only do so many years of Why are you perceiving me as a woman#Before the shit starts getting real#People really just dont take you fucking seriously. Like even at this point where im at now i still dont know if im quote unquote valid#Because maybe its just a feminist issue and the misogyny is rampant#But an emotional sensitive defensive anxious reactive woman is what i am seen as. Somehow.#When I have gone lengths to ensure that even those close to me do not see a hint of my unchained emotional reality. Just really beats it in#I am entirely logical when I describe my experiences to my family. Clinical and detatched and intentional. And they think i am to be coddle#All the fucking time. Exhausting. I don't want that. I want to come to mutual understanding. Not to beg for emotional attention.#Thats the only thing that ever visibly cracks me. Being horribly misunderstood and taken out of context. Logical self defense being denied.#And being full of estrogen just reinforces that shit. Im a frustration crier. If I had testosterone maybe it wouldnt prove people right.#When you bite back as a woman you are just a bitch.#My fear is that I will be an emotional transgender man that wants to be coddled. I am afraid it will be worse to be that.#I really do just want to be able to live and work and be taken seriously when I say what I mean and what my mind is like.#I want a chance at life. I feel like I'm seen as a hapless girl. Damaged and begging to be freed of all responsibility#No bitch I want to move out and actively build a life for myself and RAISE MYSELF! after years of being misunderstood and alone#And also i want to do homosexual war reenactments with another man or something i dont know i just wish it could be me#Maybe ill just donate blood and faint again#Anyway. Joker. Society. I am the joker#Who wanna reply and tell me if im a valid transman or not. I get chest dysphoria when i have proper posture.#I get ass and hip dysphoria.#Low key having a bangin body as a woman though confuses me still bc maybe i just like being hot more than i gaf about transitioning#It reeeeeally helps that my face has an impeccable T zone. Its kind of masc as hell.
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
I REWATCHED REANIMATOR I HAD TO DRAW A REANIMATOR DARNOLD HAHAGHAHHHG
(Version without text under cut!)
uwu
#my art#darnold#hlvrai#hlvrai fanart#darnold hlvrai#darnold pepper#half life vr but the ai is self aware#i havent drawn digitally in a while cus my pen broke this was SO nice to finally do i had this idea in my head before i rewatched the movie#I STILL HAVENT FINISHED BRIDE OF RE-ANIMATOR GUH#i love this movie SO MUCH its probably not darnold coded At All bc of the excessive gore and killing but.#he can be a mad scientist dr frankenstein coded guy for funsies :3#if im being so real Darnold would prob fit Dan's character better but I WANTED TO DRAW EVIL FUCKED UP DARNIE I LOVE HIM!!!!!!#for shits and giggles
117 notes
·
View notes
Text
not-yet-dead-person
silly comic of a conversation in-game i thought was too funny not to make something proper for instead of a doodle ww
(timelapse + wip images (thus silly process commentary in read more if you like artist commentary :3)
i think the sketch looks silly and goofy and funny so i find it important to share with you the mere presence of the faces i drew on it. i drew it on top of the boxes without staying inside its borders because i find my proportions can get wonky if i draw them cropped in a restricted space. and I feel trapped otherwise and i will draw BAD!!! give me spaceeeee to go wild!!!!
the head circles are there for emotional support
very low res speedpaint because truth is the canvas was much bigger than the space where my comic was placed. i didnt account when exporting my timelapse in 720px that that tiny space would look so pixelated ... but it's able to be percieved, so its okay.
(i will now comment on my process and it is not brief sorry)
usually i would try to clean up my sketches and figure out what goes on top before jumping into linework, but since there are multiple panels and drawings i chose to jump into inking right away for the sake of brevity. i just went in with a brush that uses pen pressure and drew what was needed. i added extra line thickness and contrast in areas around the face because it helps direct your eyes there more easily that way.
according to her equipment rei has a chain belt but i only remembered it existed once I was going to color, and i did not like that discovery... I chose to ignore it to maintain my peace. i already have the color palettes for these characters figured out, and i didnt really want to think about a new element at the moment www I tend to overthink those things a lot so i skipped it
the rest is rather straightforward! not that anything else wasn't, but in here i could turn my brain off and sing. linework and sketching require mumbling so i cannot turn my brain off. just block in the characters with a solid color so i can have a mask (something along those lines,) where the color can stay inside. then just color in !!!
Base colors just had slight cell shading on the skin, and for the hair i airbrush a bit of the skincolor in low opacity near the forehead... I'm not sure what it means, but i can look at the faces easier with it somehow. i like the gentle subtlety it adds even if you cant really tell. it makes things look nice.
background was just me blocking in the color of the wall and floor, shade the wall a bit, then slap a noise and free use wood texture on top. work smarter not harder ! yet it took a bit to make it look stylistically fitting with the characters, and even now i think bottom middle panel looks odd. whatever!!!
for the middle panel i thought itd be funny if the background was a solid silly and colorful one to contrast the next panel's sketchy black one. a contrast to how the word widow is seen. on that note my handwritting is not pointy. i gaslighted my hand into thinking that it was indeed pointy in that moment so i could write "not-yet dead person" in letters that didn't seem cute. my hand did not fall for it but it complied anyway
that's basically it! I'm not sure what else i could say that doesn't feel barebones because it really is that straightforward. if you're curious I used clip studio paint for this. only special brush used was for linework (a brush named Lemon Brush), the rest used were just the default. my computer gets the least credit. it was trying to convince me a 20mb file was going to nuke it all the time and hardly let me save multiple times so i do not appreciate it
#re:kinder#fanart#sayaka re:kinder#rei re:kinder#OH I ALREADY RAMBLED IN MY POST WHATEVER SHOULD I TALK ABOUT NOW IN MY TAGS UEEEEEEE😭😭😭#oh yeah do you want to know a fun fact about this drawing#i started it yesterday. i wasnt meant to I DID NOT HAVE PERMISSION...FROM MYSELF... i was meant to be on break#i self imposed a one week break from doing any rekinder related project after the transcript to avoid accidental burn out#NOT THAT I GOT TIRED OF IT AFTER THAT TRANSCRIPT NOT AT ALL#but jumping straight into more hours of creativr work after over 30 hours of it is asking for disaster. it is asking for burn out#yesterday was the last day . 12 hours were left but i was going to die if i didnt draw anything it would have been OVER#(aka my period started recently so i got very gloomy and depressed so i needed to run to my favorite stress relief...drawing rekinder☺️)#(on that note seriously what the fuck please explain the evolutionary advantage to getting horribly depressed every month)#(like hello?!?! rant real quick— i get enough flashbacks everyday i DONT need them to last longer and have me more msierable ?!?!?)#(periods are so dangerous to my mental health for no reason can i get a restriction order on them or some shit what the fuck)#(anyway thats enough of that break of character DONEEEE :3333)#SO YEAH I DIDNT EVEN LAST 7 WHOLE DAYS i even played a new game in between those 6 days youd think itd het my mind of rekinder. WRONNNNGGG#not even another devastating rpg horror gamr could divert my attention for long i hsd to draw rekinder😊#using the newfound power of mt transcript i was decided on drawing rei because i dont draw her enough for how high she is on my fvaorites#i was initially doodling random lines but then i stumbled upon this interactkon and it doesnt really fit into my usual expression sheets#so i thought hey lets do it asife#i thumbnailrd it and from there i was like hey lets do it in comic format isntead of separated messy doodles in tint canvas#and the rest is hisotry .... aka i spent the last two days doing this instead of doing MY HOMEWORK!!!!!#on my defense when i wasnt drawing i was horribly depressed i had no other choice#(seriously fuck off periods WHAT what do you mean i need to be distracted 24/7 to not be struck by crippling meltdowns LEAVE ME ALONE?!?!?)#(they should be banned we as a society should find like a . cure to them it dont do me good to have a whole week where i cant function)#these tags have been more of a weird rant im sorry IVE BEEN FEELING PEEEVEDDD LATELY SO YOU GET. STRANGE DROTTER LORE ????
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
hey osmosis jonesers you can read it here
#osmosis jones#oj draft script#MAKING THAT A TAG NOW BECAUSE. I NEED TO. I have plans. :3#this fuckign script was one or my roman empires actually#so if you ever wanted to know how a pg-13 osmosis jones wouldve gone…. here we go#personally im tagging any spoiler-ish art ill be making becuase I need to draw#one of the scenes where … no comment but holy shit. Ozzy you sad mother fucker#did i mention drix is more fleshed out here too. like he goes through severe self worth and identity issues as a manufactured creation and#yeah what the fuck!#ALSO T(RAX IS FUCKING BRUTAL??!28??!!? hes funny as hell thogurh in this#ozzy/leah divorce era is atcually real…. kills myself oooo ooo angst#also the parallels between the failing system of frank’s immunity and irl police systeMS ESPECIALLY DURIGN THE TIME OF WHEN THIS WAS WRITTE#TLDR. we couldve had it all. fuck the farelly brothers and fuck wb
132 notes
·
View notes
Text
i really hope people like my interpretation of chara for the pb au bc if they dont im putting my neck on a saw blade
#there is no possible portrayal of chara ever that can make everyone happy#i follow chara offense nuetral & defenders#Mostly neutral-defense though#which is where pb chara falls#and even then i may end up defanging them A Bit to make them easier to write? we’ll see how much braver im feeling after actually finishing#undertale again after all these years & finishing the fucking character bibles#we’re still early development . unfortunatley#all though the grand plot is in my head i just need to refine it#but if youre expecting someones whos only hobbies are murder and eatin chocolate youre going to be dissapointed 💔#i couldve made a new post at this point with all these fucking tags#whoops#anyways#theyre more selfish fucked up kid who needs to grow as a person#& im going to try n do that#but i used the term ‘defanged’ earlier bc i think my current draft of pb chara is softer than chara actually was in undertale#and i hope people are ok with that. im So sensitive#none of this shit is real im playing with toys#he speaks#perennial buttercup au#cw sui mention#cw suicide#cw self harm#tagging just in case. sorry i just talk like this
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
contemplating deleting my blog soon I might make a new blog but idk
#.bdo#i just need to work on some insecurity issues is all. been on a long self journey this year#can't shake the feeling that every time i say anything it's wrong somehow#and there is some reality to that. i have been wrong several times I've even been downright mean to people over misunderstandings#i just haven't been able to break out of the habit of feeling permanently embarrassed about every small mistake I've ever made#& old insecurities from my childhood are resurfacing#like when i was a kid/teen and no one would ever tell me when i was breaking social cues but they'd make fun of me behind my back#i have 3200 followers and most of my posts get 0 notes sometimes i get 1-5 so it makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong#i end up deleting a lot of them...#almost every post of mine that's gone viral was just a screenshot or picture saved from somewhere else....#and the times that i have gotten attention over a post that stands up for people who aren't like me it makes me terrified#that i look like i'm trying to play a savior role or like i'm virtue signaling#i have a few good mutuals who i love so much and that's why I'm still here#it's also the only social media i use currently#but it does really hurt when i put a lot of thought into something like spending hours making a funny meme or a thoughtful post#just to find out that the only people who find them interesting is my extremely small circle on here if anyone at all#it's so dumb i shouldn't be feeling like this over fucking numbers....it's not even real#i find a little bit of (petty) solace in the fact that there are people on here who are loudly and repeatedly saying way more embarrassing#shit than I've ever said#but even then when i know someone is absolutely wrong it makes me feel nervous like what if im the next person to fuck up that bad#and i find out through public ridicule#well that actually kinda did happen on here once but not on that scale#last year i sent someone something i thought was funny and they sent back an 'ok'#and then immediately made a huge long post about how you shouldn't talk to strangers like you're already friends#called it parasocial behavior...got tens of thousands of notes and i knew it was about me...#i wholeheartedly agree some people go too far with parasocial behavior but i never fully understood what part of what i said/did was wrong#and i went back to feeling like the kid who never found out they were doing something wrong until they heard that they got made fun of#i don't even attempt to make new friends on my own on here anymore because i'm terrified of that happening again#almost all of the people I've become friends with on here came to me first and i love and appreciate them for that#but even then i feel too nervous to socialize that often bc i never find out/realize that i fuck up until later on
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
hate when i make my ocs or self inserts have specific traits and then i go read fanfic the y/n has the same traits so it looks like im fuckin copying
#great minds think alike i guess#but i mean like#real specific shit#like how my pressure self insert cant speak bc of a throat injury#then i find a really good fic with the exact same thing#or like my pressure experiment oc has the ability to change the color of their skin/scales and they have white spots on their skin#and then the mc of a fic has the SAME FUCKING THING MAN#I SWEAR IM NOT COPYING#this is why i dont read fics when i first get into a fandom bc i dont wanna be influenced or accidentally rip off something#but then this happens
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
i LOVE that instagram doesn't let you remove the watermark from reels but anyway this is smooth enough that people without an instagram should see it i think :3, ive been getting into fursuit dancing, i'm not quite there yet but i really enjoy how this turned out
#osha rambles#fursuiter#fursona#fursuit#real beet#fursuit dance#fursuit dancer#mindless self indulgence#i fucking#guys im so mentally ill#about them#why is all of their shit SO FUCKING GOOD??#why do they feel the need to say racial slurs and harass women#mysteries society may never know the answer to#anyway don't support MSI they fucking suck#their music scratches my brain in the right way for my autism though
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
A smile is a valuable tool, it ensures that no matter waht comes your way, you're the one in control
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel spoilers#i thought perhaps that alastor couldnt NOT smile cause his face is just shaped like that#but after the finale im 100% convinced he that he did some fucked up shit like say SEWING his face into a permanent smile#cause self harm is always an easy way to regain a semblance of control and ALSO it psychologically fucks with his enemies#two birds one needle#anyway i dont really have the technical skill to pull this off as viscerally real/gorey as i want#but you understand my vision yes?#gore#self harm#hh#my art#painting#anyway i know its like about intent or w/e but why did he do like. ladder stitches across the center of his mouth#bro those are for like. closing up stuffies and pillows#alastor
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
*walks out of the Spotify covered in blood* Giles Corey .
#ohhhh my goddddddd his self titled was fucking INFLUENTIAL to how we Were as a teen at one point#we relisten to it often actually and instead of being fucking depressed#we're just like WOOOOOO YEAH THE NOISES!!!!! LOUD FUCKING INSTRUMENCE YAAAAAAAAAY#im listening to his self titled rn and im just like Holy Shit we've come such a long way. we barely relate to this music at all anymore#like we used to listen to his shit for the lyrics now we listen to it because we need. Loud Fuckening Noises soemtimes in our ears.#we LOVE how his music goes from Real Quiet to Really Goddamn Loud within seconds it's fun and stimmy#ALSO THERE'S TUMPET!!!!!!!! BWAAAAA#anyways *puts this entire album on mine and Memento's playlist* im normal! HDHDHDJDDJDJ#the nostalgia of it all tbh. like.... damn#pk;m Mori☯︎
7 notes
·
View notes