#I've spent approximately 5 hours on this and for what?

[yki-dolls]

I'm doing something utterly deranged and it is entirely self indulgent and probably won't ever get posted somewhere I'm just

Very into a ninjago au I made.

Let's put it like that

[moodymisty]

I've always had a imaginative mind. When I was 14, I would spent hours and hours reading books and watching videos about my favourite characters. I did that because I wanted to be as accurate to the source material when I inserted my little characters into what I liked. But, now as an 27-year-old, I sort of still do the same thing but I instead do it in order to gulp dick

Anyway let's estimate Vulkan's dick size (assuming he's 12 feet tall)

1. Average Male Height and Penis Size:

- The average male height is about 5 feet 9 inches (69 inches).

- The average erect penis size is about 5.16 inches

2. Calculate the Height Ratio:

- Convert 12 feet to inches: 12 times 12 = 144 inches.

- Ratio of the 12-foot height to the average male height: 144/69 approx 2.09

3. Estimate Penis Size Based on the Ratio:

- Multiply the average penis size by this ratio: 5.16 times 2.09 approx 10.78 inches.

So, if Vulkan is 12 feet tall and his body proportions scaled similarly to an average male (which obviously he is not, but I couldn't do the math otherwise), his penis size would be approximately 10.78 inches when erect.

Looking through your posts, you are 5'2. So let's find out what percentage 10.78 inches is of 62 inches (the height equivalent of 5 feet 2 inches).

1. Convert the height to inches:

- 5 feet 2 inches = 5 times 12 + 2 = 62 inches.

2. Calculate the percentage:

- 10.78/62 times 100 is approx 17.4%

So, 10.78 inches is approximately 17.4% of 62 inches. There is still 82.6% left

i love how you say there's 82.6% left like i have a quota to meet or something XD

need me a schlong that's half my body

[reality-detective]

I'm getting a chest piece done. Last night I spent approximately 3½ hours in the chair getting this 👆 done.

And it's not done 👇

This 👆 is close to what it will look like, only the feathers will be finished out more instead of being squared off like the photo. The background will also be in the finished piece.

I gotta say all of the artists at MainStreet Tattoo in Daytona Beach Florida are excellent. They have been voted best in the area 2 years in a row and that is a 4-5 county area. They have been nominated for best in the state so we'll see what happens with that.

The right side of my chest will be a collaboration of all the artists in the shop once I figure out something challenging for them to put there.

I have been in and out of tattoo shops since I was 19 and never got a single thing until I walked into this shop at the age of 63, I'm now 65 and everyone I have gotten(4) has been here. During Bike Week there are 12 artists 8 from different states and every single one is amazing, including the UK and an amazing artist from the "Ink Masters" show and he's been on that program more than anyone else.

I've witnessed a lot of awesome work walk out their doors.

If you want a stained glass window to your soul that means something to you, I highly recommend this place.

When mine is finished I will certainly post an update so you can see for yourself.

These people have become family to me and very supportive and aware of the bullshit going on in the world right now. They are like-minded people 🤔

Tell them the "Wirebender" sent you, it may help you or you'll get charged More 😂

[bleachbleachbleach]

5/24 - 5/31/24

I've been having BIG emotions all week (about racecars; about getting to see best friends and old colleagues; about my life choices [for once, positively]; about multiple retirement parties and people I want to be when *I* grow up). And of course, about my Bleach blorbos. I haven't had time to actually write, due to needing/wanting to focus on life things, but I have spent a lot of time daydreaming different iterations of one particular scene, because I have also spent like 30 hours driving (and have either 8 or 12 to do today, depending on how the Great Construction Conspiracy goes) and what else am I going to do besides try not to get destroyed by white Silverados??

I do have a written version of this scene already, but I don't think I'll use it. It's from Hisagi's POV (in every iteration it is from Hisagi's POV), which is probably a dumb POV to do the scene from, but the other two characters involved can have their version of it in a few chapters, too. The problem with Hisagi's version, aside from him definitely third-wheeling it, is that Hisagi's relative lack of real context and his imagined context of the 92 other things he's thinking about mean that this one scene connects obliquely to like three other trains of thought that are... not really related but related in his mind. And some of them are in his chapter, and others are scattered across a bunch of other chapters as Things Hisagi Thought and Then Impulsively Shared, so that's a bit difficult to keep track of as I continue to change the scene.

I feel like the scene itself is probably only going to be like 7 actual lines, in the end, just because it's stuff I really like writing but am shy about sharing, so most of this is probably just for me. 🫣

Other thoughts:

-- I met a new guy at my old workplace whom I decided I do not like but who is definitely a Joe Shinigami. Like, I feel like he's Renji's dark double. He's very gregarious, and can tell a rollicking story (or thinks he can; he performs well, but it's maybe... too performed? too self-aware of how much character he is bringing to the plate? even as he's performing something self-deprecating?). He's a poet with the most jock energy I've ever encountered from a guy with an MFA. And, having participated in an MFA soccer league for multiple years (as a non-MFA interloper), I'm not saying that out of some misapprehension that poets can't also be jocks or vice versa. It's jock ENERGY specifically. I dunno, it's kinda like he'd LIKE to be Renji or was written to be Renji, and it's similar enough to be uncanny but wrong enough to be Wrong. And instead of really liking him in the way I really like Renji, I'm just like "Man, this guy sucks." XPP

I feel like this is probably someone that Kira definitely knows in the poetry circles and he's had this exact same review process about him.

-- I was at a dental appointment yesterday and my hygienist was talking about [American] football, which is something I know approximately three things about; but these three magic beans were enough to ignite her passion. She knew all the players by name and was describing the coaches and coaching style and their entire histories, and how much she liked and trusted this coach guy, and her enthusiasm was very lovely.

But because I am absolutely addled in the head with blorbo disease, during this entire football conversation my mind was running a backing track about how the way this woman knew and talked about JIM HARBAUGH was probably really similar to how people perceived AIZEN SOUSUKE pre-defection, and how even though we only see Hinamori struggle with feelings of ambivalence where Aizen is concerned and everyone else is straightforwardly angry/anti-Aizen, that's probably not actually true and Hinamori's feelings probably ARE echoed in many. Frankly probably in Hitsugaya, even though he's probably the most demonstratively anti-Aizen person anyone knows (depending on whether you were present for the Winter War or not; if you weren't then maybe you don't know anything). Because despite the fact that he seems fairly wary by nature and was rude about Aizen even when everyone thought Aizen was Good Guy Jim Harbaugh, I think Hitsugaya liked and trusted (/entrusted Aizen with) even more than even Hitsugaya thought Hitsugaya did. I'm basing this on exactly one panel in this essay I will--

"Man, the Lions did so well last season, didn't they!"

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #320

Today, J and I woke up at approximately 6:30am to go on an airplane trip to a faraway place in western New York. It's a place called Great Valley, NY, and it's almost 5 hours away from my house by car.

…It's only 2-2.5 hours away by little airplane, though!!!

Last time we planned to go out there, we couldn't go because J had a hard time starting the airplane, and getting the equipment to get it to go cost us too much time. Today, however, we already had the equipment! And, though it took longer than J would have liked to get the engine to cooperate, we were still able to make it to the place just in time to catch the flight instructor who taught J how to fly a tailwheel airplane! We'll call him Fl!

Fl seems to be very fond of J, and that is natural because J is absolutely fucking delightful!!! The two of them had lots of very excited conversation about J's new plane; Fl seemed very happy about the make and model, and the fact that it's well-maintained and in good condition!

We got there a little too late for Fl to be able to stay with us for very long, though. The original plan was for us to have breakfast together at the nearby small fly-in restaurant, but Fl had to be on his way. Still, J and I went to the nearby place; it was called Katys, and their menu had SO MANY EPIC-LOOKING THINGS!!!!

...I'll show you what we got!!!

This was their regular coffee. I put sugar and half-and-half in it:

...The swirling fluids look kinda like some kind of gas giant planet, don't they...? It tasted just as good as it looked!!

This was their seafood stuffed mushrooms:

...They were filled with crab and some other stuff, and then covered in alfredo sauce - absolutely heavenly!!! I've never had stuffed mushrooms with alfredo sauce before, but I can confirm that it's definitely a stellar combination!!

This was an open-faced steak sandwich on garlic bread, with "sidewinder fries":

The sidewinder fries have this kind of texture:

...And there was an ale cheese to go with it!!!

...And J got a burger melt!!

Naturally, I couldn't finish everything, so I packed up the rest and brought it home for later! It's in the fridge, and it's gonna make a great breakfast tomorrow!!!

...I wish I could have shared more than just pictures of my lunch with you. This was some of the best stuff I've eaten in a long time.

Anyhoot! I'm sure you've been waiting for the pictures of the scenery, right? Lemme grab up some of the best ones:

...We didn't get back home until around 7pm. By then, I had spent a long time in the plane, and the chill from that is still in my bones!!! My body dislikes the cold very much, and due to the fact that I've had to resist it all day, I'm pretty tired.

...Also, it's like 11pm right now. I'm not gonna have time to get to the broth today. It's a shame, but... it is what it is. I'll have to rest up and try it tomorrow.

Maybe I'll sit in front of the fireplace for a bit to chase the chill away from my bones before I bury myself under some blankets and fall asleep.

...I wish you could have shared this day with me. I wish you could have enjoyed the scenery in the plane with us and eaten epic noms with us. I wish you could have met Fl. I wish you could sit next to the fireplace with me and take joy from the feeling of the autumn chill leaving your body. I wish you had your own pile of soft blankets to crawl under, upon a safe and warm bed.

...Sephiroth. Please. Make good choices out there so you can build a life like this one. Okay? Work hard on it, all right? Because you can have any of this. I promise you that you can. You just gotta make good, wholesome choices that will lead you there. I'll be rooting for you, okay?

In the meantime... please stay safe. Stay safe, because I'm gonna write to ya tomorrow.

I love you.

Your friend, Lumine

[cringevalue]

AO3 Wrapped - September 2024

I keep a fanfiction spreadsheet, I have no shame, and I need to yap about my stats.

I spent approximately 53 hours and 19 minutes reading this month. That being said, I read 48 fics this month, 118 chapters, and 520,132 words.

My top fandom was Stranger Things (obviously) with 43 fics and my top ship was Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson with 34 fics, and Chrissy Cunningham following close behind with a whopping... 2. My top five reoccurring characters were Eddie Munson in 38 fics, Steve Harrington in 38 fics, Robin Buckley in 17 fics, Nancy Wheeler in 10 fics, and Dustin Henderson in 9 fics.

The three tags I read the most were Bisexual Steve Harrington in 14 fics, Hurt / Comfort in 11 fics, and Gay Eddie Munson in 10 fics, and my top rating this month was Explicit with 21 fics.

The most words I read in a day was 57,981 on September 22nd and the longest fic I read was roll the dice on my thighs by myworldoffanfiction at 63,857 words. September 22nd was also the day I spent the most time on AO3, according to my screen time, at 5 hours and 12 minutes.

All of this information (aside from time spent reading) and every fic I've read this month can be found on my spreadsheet!

Every Stranger Things fic I read this month is linked under the cut :)

(The post is too long with the other fandoms)

Stranger Things

Meet the Ghoul Squad by Emmie_a19

Teen and Up - 5.8k - Steve Harrington / Reader - Halloween, Friendship, Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Alternate Universe - Creatures & Monsters

Hawkins, Indiana is home to a monstrous crew, quite literally. And witch Emmy Henderson has never had a friend to her name, until seventh grade. Along the way, she befriends all types of monsters, including human Steve van Harrington.

Yeah, We’re Doing Tattoos by TwistedSiren86

General Audiences - 3.8k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Eddie Munson is a Sweetheart, Gay Eddie Munson, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Eddie and Steve are Married, Dad!Eddie Munson, Dad!Steve Harrington, Trans Eddie Munson, Fluff, Happy Ending, One Shot, Family Fluff, Tattoo Artist Eddie Munson

Eddie and Steve are married with their toddler daughter Lily, who has the artistic muse her father has. So when Lily gets caught drawing on her walls with crayons, Eddie has a better idea.

My Little Siren by ApomaroMellow

General Audiences - 7.9k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Inspired by The Little Mermaid (Disney Movies), Deaf Steve Harrington, Drowning

Steve is entranced by the voice he hears every night. After nearly drowning, he seeks the aid of magic to turn him into a merman so that he can find the owner of that voice.

Non-Stop Talker, What A Rocker by beetlesandstars

Explicit - 3.4k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - First Kiss, First Time, Gay Eddie Munson, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington Has a Breeding Kink, Dirty Talk, Smoking, Explicit Sexual Content, Friends to Lovers, Loss of Virginity, Virgin Eddie Munson, Making Out, Marijuana, Falling In Love, Hand Jobs

“How far’ve you gone? What've you done before?” Eddie didn’t think it was possible for his cheeks to get any warmer, but lo and behold, they do. “Uh.” He swallows, fighting the urge to curl into a pillbug. “Nothing.”

I Don't Think We're In Hawkins Anymore, Big Boy by Hbyrde

General Audiences - 17.5k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Post-Season/Series 04, Eddie Munson Lives, Gay Eddie Munson, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Love Confessions, Feelings Realization, Friends to Lovers, Wizard of Oz References, Banter, Flirting, Getting Together, Adventures in Following the Yellow Brick Road with Your Crush, Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington Are Best Friends, Steve Harrington Has a Crush on Eddie Munson, Pining, Steve and Robin Being Besties in Every Universe (Literally), Happy Ending, Fluff

After being run off the road in a freak accident during a terrible storm, Steve and Eddie find that not only have they committed vehicular manslaughter, but they’ve also somehow been whisked away to a strange land. The journey is rough and they are being hunted for revenge, but through it all Steve and Eddie grow closer than ever as they try and find their way home with the help of some new friends with familiar faces. -Or- A Steddie Wizard of Oz AU

i want your guy (to know) by happypilot

Teen and Up - 5.5k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - POV Tommy Hagan, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Future Fic, 2000s, Period-Typical Homophobia, Unreliable Narrator, Jealous Tommy Hagan, One-Sided Tommy Hagan/Steve Harrington - depends on who you ask, Unrequited Love, The Underrated Heartbreak of a Friendship Breakup, Writer Eddie Munson, Dads Steddie

Tommy thumbs through the first few pages of the magazine until he reaches Eddie’s interview, and, again, he allows himself to look over the photo of him that takes up nearly three-quarters of the first page even if he has no intention of actually reading the article itself because, again, Eddie looks good (and maybe there’s something about the scruff of facial hair along his jaw that Tommy's eye gets stuck on). Tommy’s allowed to say that men look good when it’s true – it’s 2007, as his wife likes to remind him whenever it’s convenient for her, and if she’s allowed to say that Angelina Jolie looked good in that CIA movie, then Tommy is allowed to say that Eddie Munson looks good here. When Tommy flips to the next page, he’s met with a photo that stops him in his tracks, has his feet frozen to the floor because – Jesus Christ, that’s Steve Harrington. Fuck, okay, so he’s reading this fucking article. — May 2002. Featuring a magazine, an interview, and the devastation in getting answers.

Baby look out, I'm a man on the prowl by Ninjantome

Explicit - 3.3k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Alternate Universe - Serial Killers, Eddie Munson is a Serial Killer, Nancy Wheeler Has a Gun, Hitchhiking, Rape/Non-con Elements, Steve Harrington is in for a Ride, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Restraints, Gags, Doesn't Ask for It but Gets Into It, Hand Jobs, Choking, Anal Sex, Rough Sex, Rough Kissing, Car Sex, Serial Killing Business but No One Actually Dies Here, Queen Soundtrack, Scream Team

Steve Harrington gives a lift to a pretty hitchhiker and gets more than he bargained for... A serial killer on his backseat.

This darkened street we travel by what_about_the_fish

Explicit - 3.6k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Serial Killer Eddie Munson, Dark Steve Harrington, Murder, Blood, Blood and Violence, Fist Fights, Consensual Non-Consent, Rough Sex, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Anal Sex

Darkness calls to darkness. Steve taunts his boyfriend just to see the darkness come out to play

Once Upon Your Dead Body by LaLorelei

Mature - 2.4k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Character Turned Into Vampire, Dead Eddie Munson, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Human/Vampire Relationship, Dracula References, Past Steve Harrington/Nancy Wheeler, Minor Maxine "Max" Mayfield/Lucas Sinclair, Vampire Bites, Kink Discovery, Steve Harrington Has a Bisexual Awakening, Post-Season/Series 04

Steve spends the day listening to Lucas reading Max horror stories and then has a powerful dream of vampire Eddie showing up to seduce him.

It's UnEVEN by BiBeanTransBean

General Audiences - 905 - Eddie Munson & Multiple Characters - Boys in Skirts, Non-Sexual, Makeup, Gay Eddie Munson, Soft Eddie Munson, Eddie Munson Deserves Nice Things, Bisexual Maxine "Max" Mayfield, BAMF Maxine "Max" Mayfield, Bisexual Eleven | Jane Hopper, Good Friend Robin Buckley, Autistic Eddie Munson, Protective Steve Harrington, Short & Sweet, I like to Think Eddie Wears Skirts and Fishnets and Sometimes Crop Tops, This One is Kinda 1 Time Robin Helped Eddie, Max Sees Eddie as a New Older Brother, Eddie Likes the Sibling-Like Bond He and Max Have so He Agrees to be Her "Older Bro"

Max and El do Eddie's makeup and nails, but his eyeliner is uneven, so he does a little freak out and goes to Robin and Steve for help

Lapse by Yikes_Writes

Mature - 5.2k - Steve Harrington - Hurt Steve Harrington, Found Family Sweetness, Rated Mature Because I Can't Not Swear an Obscene Amount Soz, Platonic Relationships, Robin and Steve are FRIENDS, Epilepsy, Epileptic Steve Harrington, I picked Canon to Keep from Season Three and The Rest of it Was Thrown Away, Steve Harrington Needs a Hug, Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington Friendship, Steve Harrington Has Bad Parents, Steve Harrington Needs Love, and He Gets It!!!!!, Medical Procedures, Hospitals, Seizures, Absence Seizures

The first time Robin noticed it, Steve was helping a customer at Family Video. He was in the middle of a sentence, i the middle of a transaction behind the register when his eyes drifted up towards the ceiling and his voice trailed off. His jaw shifted around and he chewed on his tongue. It was like he was completely vacant. It lasted a few seconds, and he snapped back in, finishing his sentence and continuing the transaction like nothing happened. - Steve's been having seizures.

Nothing Done Nothing Said by hyperrbolic_orange

Teen and Up - 19.1k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Alternate Universe - No Upside Down (Stranger Things), First Kiss, Eddie Munson is a Sweetheart, Hurt Steve Harrington, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington Has a Sexuality Crisis, Steve Harrington Has a Bisexual Awakening, Billy Hargrove Being an Asshole, but Very Minor, Steve has a Concussion, Steve Harrington Has Bad Parents, Hospitals, Head Injury, Minor Angst, Fluff, Romantic Fluff, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Well Kind of Unresolved, For a Little

After getting hit on the head with a basketball, Steve Harrington is found passed out behind the school by Eddie Munson. He helps Steve to the ER, and that probably should've been the end of it. Would have been the end of it, except that when Steve had woken up and found Eddie leaning over him, well, he kind of realized that Eddie might've just been the most beautiful person he'd ever seen. And that was a goddamned problem.

Hot Knife by FkinKindaGauche

Explicit - 9.3k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Omega Verse, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Enemies to Lovers, Recreational Drug Use, POV Alternating, Omega Steve Harrington, Alpha Eddie Munson, Cunnilingus, Blow Jobs, Vaginal Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Knotting, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - No Upside Down (Stranger Things), Title from a Fiona Apple Song

“I’m Steve Harrington.” He hit Eddie with his best bedroom eyes. He knew Eddie couldn’t smell him through the scent patch, but surely he’d heard of Steve Harrington, omega swim team superstar. Eddie just stared at Steve’s hand, not extending his own. “Can I help you with something, Harrington?” He sounded annoyed. “Or are you just here to stare and interrupt our conversation?” Okay, this was not going the way Steve had expected. He typically had no trouble picking up alphas, in fact they tended to be the ones throwing themselves at Steve. He could deal with this, though. Just a little pushback. He’d try again when there weren’t so many people around, maybe Eddie was just shy. “No, just wanted to introduce myself,” Steve said, smiling. Eddie waited for a moment then waved his hand away from the table. “Well, introduction done. Run along, jock boy.”

I Can Wait For You At The Bottom by Atalia_Gold

Mature - 57.5k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Depression, Steve Harrington Is a Mess, Eddie Munson is a Sweetheart, Steve Harrington Has Bad Parents, Alternate Universe - No Upside Down (Stranger Things), Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, Steve Harrington Needs a Hug, He Gets Many, Supportive Wayne Munson, Eventual Smut, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Vomiting, Steve Harrington Has Body Image Issues, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Hurt/Comfort, Steve Harrington Has Migraines, Slow Burn, Disordered Eating, Hand Jobs

“Leave me!” The boy repeated, insistent now, and Eddie’s hand felt wet against the boy’s face now. He realized with a pang that he was crying. From his position in the doorway, Eddie could see into the lounge, and his stomach dropped at the sight of several empty pill packets on the coffee table, moonlight glinting off them. “Nah, I’m not gonna do that,” Eddie murmured to him, and he pulled the boy closer, ignoring his weak protests and guiding his head into his lap. “S’alright, I gotcha.” ***** Steve drives to an isolated cabin intending to end it all. He wasn't counting on a desperate boy breaking into the cabin on the same night.

Living Dead Boy by DutchsPretties

Explicit - 6.6k - Chrissy Cunningham / Eddie Munson - Zombie Eddie Munson, Necromancer Chrissy Cunningham, Witch Chrissy Cunningham, Cemetery, Graveyard, Resurrection, Temporary Character Death, Halloween, Ritual Sex, Vaginal Sex, Cunnilingus, Multiple Orgasms, Female Ejaculation, Riding

Chrissy Cunningham wants to ressurect Eddie Munson after an interesting discovery found in his locker.

A deal with the devil by Just_my_latest_hyperfixation

Teen and Up - 980 - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Alternate Universe - Pirate, Pirate Eddie Munson, Castaway Steve Harrington, Billy Hargrove Being an Asshole, Dehydration, Steve Harrington Whump, Non-Consensual Bondage, Sexual Tension, Sexual Innuendo

Steve's stomach drops. Because now that the fog is slowly lifting from his mind, the man looks familiar. He's seen that face before, staring back at him from Wanted posters in port towns. “You're Edward Munson,” he mutters. “The pirate.”

to be a king by burningkerosene

General Audiences - 4.9k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Pirate Eddie Munson, Alternate Universe - Pirate, Pirates, Prince Steve Harrington, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington Needs a Hug, Boats and Ships, Boys Kissing, Boys In Love, Getting Back Together, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Childhood Friends, Friends to Lovers, Intimacy, Gay Eddie Munson, Friendship, Cuddling & Snuggling, Sleepovers, Birthday, Rings, guys i love them so much u dont understand, i wrote this half at school and half at home, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, the steddie brainworms make me feel insane, Eddie Munson Has a Crush on Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington Has a Crush on Eddie Munson, Steve Harrington Has Abandonment Issues

Prince Steven Harrington isn't sure he has a place. Sure, he's gonna be king one day. He's gonna get married to some Princess and have kids to take the throne after him but it's not what he wants. No, Steve has always wanted to be a pirate.

keep with me forward by shortcrust

Teen and Up - 19.8k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Domesticity, Healing, Character Study

The house that the government buys Eddie is pink.

Out of Curiosity by camouflagedlove

Teen and Up - 13k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - 5+1 Things, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Slight Mentions of Jonathan/Argyle, Slight Mention of Lucas/Max, Seduction Tactics, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington Friendship, Eddie Munson is Oblivious, Everyone Knows Steve Likes Eddie, except for Steve, Eddie Munson is Stubborn, Flirty Steve Harrington, Wingman Robin Buckley, Dialogue Heavy, Recreational Drug Use, Steve Being Insecure About His Scars, Steve Harrington Has a Crush on Eddie Munson, Eddie Munson Has a Crush on Steve Harrington, Mutual Pining, But Eddie's Less Obvious

“So you’re not attracted to me? Like at all?” Steve asked. Robin dropped her head onto the counter with a loud thump and a groan. “Steve, buddy, you can calm down. I, Eddie Munson, am not attracted to nor planning to hit on King Steve. Scout’s honor,” Eddie held up his fingers to mirror a scout salute. Or: 5 times Eddie wouldn't admit he finds Steve attractive and 1 time he finally did.

smile like a razor's edge by SaintMarySunshine

Explicit - 8k - Chrissy Cunningham / Eddie Munson - Alternate Universe - No Upside Down (Stranger Things), Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Serial Killer!Eddie Munson, Dark!Chrissy Cunningham, Hybristophilia, Violence Against Women, Past Child Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Psychical Abuse, The shit that is the American foster system, Animal Death, Past Animal Abuse, Period-Typical Homophobia, Period Typical Attitudes, Eddie is not a Homophobe, he might be a serial killer but he's not a homophobe, period typical slang for queer people but it's incredibly brief, eddie is like hey what if i murdered you :) and chrissy is like hey what if i got off on that :), Murder Husbands, they're horrible people but they're in love, Happy Ending, like this is actually a pretty positive fic, Consensual But Not Safe Or Sane, Horrible People Being Horrible, Everything is Beautiful and Everything Hurts

Eddie Munson is a smooth-talking Southern gentleman. He also happens to be a prolific murderer. Chrissy Cunningham is eighteen years old and the apple of everybody's eye. She also happens to be a fucking lunatic, she's just really good at hiding it. Boy meets girl. xxx Excerpt: You know those old cornball comedies? The one where a precocious kid gets in all kinds of wacky debacles? And when it gets particularly wild, he turns to the camera, all smiles. There’s a record scratch. And the kid will say something like, “I bet you’re wondering how I got here.” If Chrissy’s life was a movie... If it was a movie, little miss American-dream-homecoming-queen would turn to the camera, a conspiratorial twist to her mouth. There! Can’t you hear it? There’s the record scratch! The freeze frame! As she lies under the most brutal serial killer in Indiana history, letting him fuck her hard, sweet as pie cheerleader Chrissy Cunningham would smile to the invisible audience and say, “I bet you’re wondering how I got here.”

You Wouldn’t Dare, Big Boy by clownprincepickle

General Audiences - 1.7k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Pirate AU, Mike Wheeler is a Little Shit, implied byler, mike wheeler hates women, eddie is so gay he forgets he’s in danger, i hate Steve’s parents, Nancy’s got a gun, Fluff, Implied Boat Hijacking, fuck the law, Eddie Munson being a fucking flirt

“Shit.” The pirate captain breathed, holding a hand out as if he wasn’t about to attempt grand theft nautical. Or, Steve Harrington let’s himself get roped into crime by a cute pirate captain.

Shovel Talks by unkreativstermensch

Teen and Up - 4.3k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Gay Eddie Munson, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Protective Wayne Munson, POV Outsider, Wayne adopts Steve, but dont tell him that he doesnt know, Steve Harrington Has Bad Parents, Steve Harrington Needs a Hug, eddie too, Eddie Munson Lives, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, wayne hates steves dad, Shovel Talk

“Oh,” Steve says. Then again, “oh,” a little quieter. His expression changes; from confusion to something pained almost. “Mr Munson, I don’t…” he takes a deep breath, his voice a little shaky as he continues. “I don’t think he…I don’t think he likes me like that.” He doesn’t say “it’s not like that.” Neither does he say “I’m not like that.” That’s the first thing Wayne notices. or: Wayne decides to give Steve the shovel talk, only to realize he might not be the one needing one

our house (in the middle of our street) by fivecenturiesverse

Teen and Up - 14.4k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - POV Steve Harrington, Asexual Relationship, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Gay Eddie Munson, Lesbian Robin Buckley, Bisexual Vickie (Stranger Things), Implied Sexual Content, Minor Maxine "Max" Mayfield/Lucas Sinclair, Disabled Maxine "Max" Mayfield, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Families of Choice, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, Domestic Fluff, Literal Sleeping Together, Sharing a Bed, steve harrington match maker, mom and dad steve and eddie, Good Babysitter Steve Harrington, Good Babysitter Eddie Munson, Drinking, Recreational Drug Use, Drunken Kissing, Drunken Confessions, Flirting, robin and steve codependency, Roommates, Living Together

He's in the market for a house, it's not his fault the Creel Murder House is the cheapest place he can find. It's kind of the perfect house, really, Steve's got a big family. - Eddie fumbles in rolling the blunt. They’re sitting in Eddie’s room while he rolls on the tray balanced on his knees. “You’re — you’re giving me a key?” “Yeah. I don’t know if you want to move out of here but uh… option is there if you uhm, need it?” He stays staring at Steve, fingers paused over the tray like the ridiculous caricature of a stoner caught red handed by the cops. “For real? What about rent?” “Yeah man, of course. I know you haven’t been sleeping great here for obvious reasons and like, a new place isn’t going to help that much but…” He shrugs. “Got more rooms than I know what to do with, so fuck rent. I’m getting keys for you and Rob next week and maybe some for the kids, I don’t know if I trust them with keys to my house.”

Got You By My Side by august_justice

Teen and Up - 7k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Pre-Slash, Getting Together, Post-Season/Series 04, Eddie Munson Lives, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, no beta we die like characters whose name starts with b, Bisexual Eddie Munson, Bisexual Steve Harrington, brief mention of past unrequited Chrissy Cunningham/Eddie Munson, as in just…one line about Eddie having a crush on her in middle school

After barely making it out of the Upside Down alive, Eddie wakes up in the hospital with one Steve Harrington at his bedside. They've got a few things to talk about.

roll the dice on my thighs by myworldoffanfiction

Teen and Up - 63.8k - Steve Harrington & Everyone - Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Not Canon Compliant, Canon Rewrite, Steve Harrington Has Powers, Hurt Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington is a Sweetheart, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington Needs a Hug, Child Neglect, Neglect, Past Child Abuse, Child Abuse, Season/Series 01, Canon-Typical Violence, Violence, Blood and Violence, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Telekinesis, Seven, Tattoos, Headaches & Migraines, Steve Harrington Has Migraines, Child Experimentation, Human Experimentation, Daddy Issues, Mommy Issues, Shock, Electrocution, Electricity, Electrocution Therapy, Seizures, Steve Harrington Has Brain Damage, Steve Harrington Has Bad Parents, Steddie Brainrot, Medical Inaccuracies, Steve Harrington-centric, Period-Typical Homophobia, Canon-Typical Behavior, Nosebleed

Steve has blocks in his memory, but a certain name and a certain voice ring his mind constantly. Like a broken record, he hears the voice but cannot identify it. Don’t be afraid, Seven. Or; the Steve has powers fic you knew you needed.

see the other side by kdqt314

Explicit - 3.7k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Dom/sub, Switch Steve Harrington, Sub Eddie Munson, Dom Eddie Munson, Dom Steve Harrington, Humiliation, Trying New Things, Masturbation, Face Slapping, Come Shot, Hair-pulling, Stereotypes, Bratting, Pet Play If You Squint, Aftercare, Eddie Munson Has Sensory Issues, Frottage, Communication, sometimes Eddie just needs to turn off his brain, Eddie Munson is a Little Shit

Eddie thinks he's a Dom, until his boyfriend shows him he's not.

horror films & hormones by cheapqueer

Explicit - 2.3k - Eddie Munson / Reader - Eddie Munson is a Sweetheart, Eddie Munson Smut, Soft Eddie Munson, Top Eddie Munson, Dom Eddie Munson, Oral Sex, Vaginal Sex, Penis In Vagina Sex, Creampie, Alternate Universe - No Upside Down (Stranger Things), Stranger Things 4, Eddie Munson is a Little Shit, Eddie Munson Fluff

watching a horror movie with your boyfriend doesn’t go exactly as planned.

that rush is almost all you can stand by PrincessOTP

Explicit - 7.1k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Bottom Steve Harrington, Top Eddie Munson, Virgin Eddie Munson, Dom Eddie Munson, Sub Steve Harrington, Light Dom/sub, Hanky Code, Handkerchief Code, Smut, Pet Names, Making Out, Anal Fingering, Masturbation, Begging, Hand Jobs, Biting, Praise Kink, Anal Sex, Light Feminization, the babygirlification of steve harrington, Breeding Kink, Eddie teaches Steve guitar, Steve Harrington Has a Crush on Eddie Munson, POV Steve Harrington

“Please fuck me, Eddie.” Eddie’s head shot up to look at Steve, eyes wide and dark. “What?” “Cmon I know you heard me, Eds.” Steve whined, squirming under Eddie’s gaze. “Yeah. I just— I didn’t expect that. I kinda thought you’d wanna fuck me.” That made Steve stop. “But aren’t you a top?” “I mean, I don’t really care which way we do it. We can switch or whatever.” Eddie shrugged, sitting up a little and removing his hands. Steve mourned the feeling of his skin on his. He scrunched his nose in confusion. “But what about the hanky?” “What hanky?” God, did Steve have to spell it out? “Your— your bandana!” “What about it?” “It means you're a top who’s into S&M!” “It means WHAT?” - Or the one where Steve knows more about flagging than Eddie

November Paramedic by BackyardOwl

Mature - 25.6k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Minor Maxine "Max" Mayfield/Lucas Sinclair, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fluff and Humor, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Awkwardness, Gay Eddie Munson, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Paramedic Steve Harrington, Lust at First Sight, Sexual Tension, Eddie Munson Has a Crush on Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson is a Mess, Steve Harrington is a Sweetheart, Good Friend Gareth (Stranger Things) Good Friend Maxine "Max" Mayfield, Eddie would disagree on the "good friends" part but it's true, POV Eddie Munson, Masturbation, Rimming, Anal Sex

Eddie has had his fair share of fantasies, but none of them involved fucking a paramedic. Until two years ago. That's when the "sexy men at work"-calendar got added to his porn stash and orgasms as he knew them changed forever. All the men in the calendar are hot, but none of them hold a candle to the paramedic. He's got this look in his eyes, this slant to his mouth. Like he knows he's the hottest guy in it. And everything is fine. Everything is great. Eddie's been single forever and he has no idea where he's headed in life, but he's fine. At least until he's collateral damage in a bar fight after a gig, and none other than his sexy November-paramedic arrives to treat his wounds.

held frozen like an angel to me by stobinesque (amusingdisplacement)

Explicit - 10.3k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Alternate Universe - Creatures & Monsters, Vers Dom Steve Harrington, Vers Sub Eddie Munson, Monsterfucking, Monster Steve Harrington, Rockstar Eddie Munson, Dual POV, gothic vibes, Shapeshifting Genitalia, Dream Sex, Dream Manipulation, Sleep Paralysis, Biting, Blood Kink, Aphrodisiac Venom, Choking, Breeding Kink, Possessiveness/Obsession, Ownership, Collars, Compulsion, Vaginal Sex, Oral Sex, Come Play, Come Eating, Foot Kink, Cock & Ball Torture, light gore, Religious References and Biblical Allusions, Dacryphilia, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Tails, Wing Kink, Lactation Kink, Knotting, Good Boy Eddie Munson, Theodore Munson truthing hours

There's a figure in the doorway, silhouetted by the chandeliers he keeps faintly lit in the receiving hall. Eddie sees the outline of wings. Of horns. A flowered crown. No sooner has he had the thought to reach out than the figure is stalking towards him. Eddie still can't move, and the beat of his heart picks up its pace. Not yet pounding in terror, but racing like he's just started a chase. He wants to speak. Wants to cry out, wants to— "Hello, my pet."

on your knees by orphan_account

Mature - 1.5k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Smut, thats all i know how to write, Marijuana, eddie munsons band, Top Eddie Munson, Bottom Steve Harrington, established eddie munson/steve harrington

Pretend W.A.S.P. didn't write on your knees, yes i can smell the metalhead tears from my computer as I write this. I will probably read this later when I sober up and delete this vile ass shit. Basically, Eddie writes a song but wont let Steve hear it until he plays it in concert.

Hawkins’ School of Witchcraft and Wizardry by steveharringtoned

General Audiences - 43.4k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Good Babysitter Steve Harrington, Protective Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson-centric, Triwizard Tournament (Harry Potter), Protective Eddie Munson, Hurt Eddie Munson, Slow Burn, Eddie Munson Has a Crush on Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington is Viktor Krum With Hair, Yule Ball (Harry Potter), Hurt/Comfort, POV Eddie Munson, Chosen One Eleven, Dragons, Underwater Kiss, Muggleborn Steve Harrington, Angst, Whump, Hurt Steve Harrington

After failing his fifth year twice, Eddie is ready to buckle down and have just one, relatively normal year at Hawkins’ School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. But then famous professional Quidditch player, Durmstrang golden-boy Steve Harrington just has to enter the Triwizard Tournament. (And Eddie can’t be one-upped by him and his flouncy hair—no way. Not when Dustin’s respect is on the line.) But maybe he’ll finally prove to Gryffindor House that he belongs there after all.

Red puddle of mud (skin warm in the sun) by sweetlikesugar

Explicit - 4.3k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Extremely Dubious Consent, Blood and Gore, Murder, Intercrural Sex, Anal Fingering, Blood As Lube, Post-Stranger Things 4 Vol. 2, Obsessive Behavior, Exhibitionism, Dark Steve Harrington

And Eddie has thought about kissing boys. He obsessed about kissing boys. He has kissed a few boys, quick and wet, tasting like booze and bad weed, with stubble scratching his face and strong waist under his hands, with none of the give of the girl’s soft physique. None of it holds a candle to the way Steve Harrington is kissing him.

don't need your roses, i like men on their knees by callunavulgari

Explicit - 5.1k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Alternate Universe - Serial Killers, Serial Killer Eddie Munson, FBI Agent Steve Harrington, Explicit Sexual Content

“Did you like my last letter?” Munson asks him softly, eying Steve through lowered lashes. “You mean the one where you told the entire bureau every lurid thought that you’ve ever had about my cock?” Steve says waspishly. “Yeah, can’t say that I did.” Munson’s smile grows, just a little, enough to show teeth. He flicks his eyes downwards, slow and pointed, before he drags them up again. He takes another step forward, until he’s tucked easily into the curve of Steve’s body and reaches down, palming the curve of Steve’s cock and balls through his slacks. He cups gently, the press of his fingers barely there, but still hard enough to make Steve hiss, his hips twitching into the touch. “You sure about that?” Munson asks slyly.

wanna be the only one for miles and miles (except for maybe you) by judasofsuburbia

Explicit - 4.9k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Alternate Universe - Western, Outlaw!Eddie Munson, Sheriff!Steve Harrington, Homosexual Wound Care, Domestic, Blow Jobs, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Love Confessions

“Aren’t I supposed to be runnin’ from you?” Eddie jokes, half-heartedly. “You are the sheriff after all.” “I’m not a sheriff to you,” Steve whispers. “Not here.” Eddie can take Steve’s food, Steve’s bath water, Steve’s bed, Steve’s warmth. He doesn’t think he can take Steve’s love. or: outlaw!eddie runs to sheriff!steve's house after a fight at the saloon expecting to get chewed out but finds something sweeter instead.

sweetness on our lips by deadratz

Explicit - 5.4k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Established Relationship, First Time, Virgin Eddie Munson, Bottom Eddie Munson, Top Steve Harrington, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Oral Sex, First Time Blow Jobs, Possessive Steve Harrington, Good Boy Eddie Munson, Praise Kink, Multiple Orgasms, Love Confessions, Loss of Virginity

Steve thinks this might be the longest he's gone without sex ever since he first lost his virginity. It's certainly the longest he's gone without sex while actively dating someone. Four months in, and he and Eddie have been taking things slow. And he's perfectly fine with that, even if he's been imagining spending his entire life with Eddie since the moment he was pressed up against the wall in that boat house.

Future Hazy Try Again by merry_magpie

Teen and Up - 30.3k - Eddie Munson & Everyone - Eddie Munson is 010, Eddie Munson Needs a Hug, Eddie Munson Has Powers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Alternate Universe, Precognition, Underage Drinking, Recreational Drug Use, Good Parent Wayne Munson, Eddie Munson Has ADHD, Big Brother Eddie Munson, Steve Harrington is a Sweetheart, Bisexual Eddie Munson, Bisexual Male Character, Bullying, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Self-Medication, Canon Temporary Character Death, Minor Steve Harrington/Nancy Wheeler, Grief/Mourning, Eddie Munson Fights, Driving While High

Eddie escaped the lab early in 1979 and has never looked back. Until his sister shows up in November of 1983 and Eddie can no longer keep away from the weird stuff. A re-write of the end of season one if Eddie was 10 and had very reluctantly joined the Party.

To Deserve Love, etc by Ragazza_Guasto

Explicit - 6.1k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Gay Eddie Munson, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Sugar Daddy Steve Harrington, A teaspoon of angst, Robin Buckley Saves The Day, First Time, Blow Jobs, Himbo Steve Harrington, Humor

"Why are you buying Eddie expensive gifts?” He went completely blank, wheels spinning. Nothing he'd been telling himself sounded remotely coherent when he thought about articulating it. "It's just...a nice thing to do? For a friend.” "Uh huh," she planted her elbows on the counter, chin propped up on her hands, "so where's my expensive gift?” He couldn't control the face he made at that. It was too fucking telling apparently because her face smoothed out, like she had the missing puzzle piece, the internal 'gotcha'. "Steve. Did you buy gifts for Nancy?" It didn't matter how slow she asked the question, it still struck him in the gut. He wheezed. None of the bullshit he'd been telling himself these last few weeks held up under Robin's scrutiny, she'd ripped the planks off all the boarded up windows. He wasn't buying nice things for a friend. He was courting Eddie. “Oh, fuck,” he grunted. “What the fuck am I doing?”

Show Me Your Teeth by entanglednow

Explicit - 7.8k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Play Fighting, First Kiss, First Time, Getting Together, Kink Discovery, Kink Exploration, Biting, so much biting, Bitemarks, Rimming, Sexual Content, Idiots in Love, Eddie Munson is a Mess

Eddie Munson apparently didn't get the memo that you can't just bite the people you're interested in. But Steve decides that he's surprisingly willing to hear him out.

if somebody loves you (won't they always love you?) by twelvexclara

Explicit - 13.5k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Compliant, Exes to Lovers, Forced Proximity, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Omega Steve Harrington, Alpha Eddie Munson, Intersex Omegas, Rejection Sickness, Cunnilingus, Rough Sex, Knotting, Breeding Kink, Unsafe Sex, Beta Read, Stress Heat

“Steve—” “Nope,” Steve snaps, cutting Eddie off. “Not doing this right now, sorry.” There’s a moment of silence, before— “I just think we should talk about—” A bubble of laughter forces its way up Steve’s throat, slipping past his mouth. He turns to face Eddie, ready to spit venom at the man, but that’s when he takes in Eddie's face. - When Eddie breaks up with Steve seemingly out of nowhere, Steve scrambles to pick up the pieces in the aftermath of it.

we can be ghosts by hydrangea_bush

Mature - 8.3k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Alternate Universe - Pirate, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Childhood Friends, Childhood Memories, Strangers to Lovers, Shipwrecks, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Banter, Pirate!Eddie Munson, Sailor!Steve Harrington

“Are you a pirate?” Steve demands. “Are you afraid of me?” he counters, lips curling into an amused smile. // After a fierce storm leaves Steve shipwrecked and delirious on the ocean, he finds himself rescued by the mysterious captain of The Hellfire. Someone who seems too familiar for his own good.

Did Someone Mix You Up? by fabeld

Explicit - 25.4k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Post-Stranger Things 2, Pre-Stranger Things 3, Making Out, Internalized Homophobia, Period Typical Attitudes, Steve's Parents Are Not Abusive, Gay Eddie Munson, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Recreational Drug Use, Dysfunctional Relationships

Steve rolled onto his side and studied Eddie's face. The slope of his nose and the outline of his jaw, where dark stubble grew in patches. “What's it like?” Steve asked. “Kissing another guy?”

We Passed the Setting Sun by etienne (FanfictionForAtheists)

Teen and Up - 5.7k - Steve Harrington / Eddie Munson - Trees, The Upside Down (Stranger Things), Hurt Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington Has Brain Damage, Deaf Steve Harrington, Deaf Character, Eddie Munson Lives, Or does he:3, Loneliness, Isolation, Steve Harrington's Pool, Minor Joyce Byers/Jim "Chief" Hopper, Confessions, Love Confessions, Brain Damage, meow, Post-Canon, Post-Season/Series 04, Canon Compliant, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Hurt No Comfort, Emotionally Repressed, Death, Scars, Hurt Eddie Munson, Other Characters Are Mentioned, Trauma, Purple

Steve sometimes had to check himself in the mirror to make sure that everything that he remembered had happened. And then he’d see the myriad of scar tissue, and the way that he couldn’t hear what he was saying, despite seeing his chapped lips move, and he’d remember that 'oh yeah, I may or may not be living above literal hell'. or It's November 1990, over four years since the events of series four. Everyone has their own lives now, but Steve... Steve is lost. -- The Steddie Tree Fic

That was a lot, folks. Have fun.

[wykedstories]

Chapter 5: The Gas Station.

I'm so happy the school day went fast and I'm now on my way back home. I'm actually excited to go home for once considering Mia is there and it feels like I haven't spent time with her in ages. Mia loves it when we paint together so maybe that's what I'll do when I get home. I can't stop thinking about that guy in the black hoodie today and how uncomfortable he made me. I can't pinpoint a reason why he made me so uncomfortable though. Maybe I'm just a big ball of anxiety. I constantly worry about literally anything. It's a wonderful way to live. 

There should be nothing about some random guy that is bothering me so much. I only saw him twice, but he gave me such a gut wrenching feeling both the times I saw him. I happened to glance down at my gas gauge and I got to stop to get gas, Oh how wonderful to have to make just one more stop when all I want to be is at home. The only real question I have is “ Why hasn't anyone invented the ability to teleport”? Either way, that's not gonna solve the problem that I still have to stop for gas. Here we go, down the long windy road to the nearest gas station to my house. Of course, leave it to me to almost be home and notice my car is almost empty. It's gonna be about 22  minutes one way to the gas station. That's 44 minutes round trip with perfect traffic, but you know that never perfectly works out. So let's shoot for a solid hour trip. That means I'll get home at approximately 6:30pm. I'm going to go home and paint flowers with Mia. I've been thinking so much about painting with her all day and that stupid guy in the black hoodie.

I asked Siri to turn on my road trip playlist which consisted of red hot chili peppers and nirvana and other similar genres. My favorite thing to do is play under the bridge by the red hot chili peppers as I go under the bridge right before the gas station. I have done it so many times that I know if i start my playlist at a certain point on the road the music will line up perfectly to that song and my favorite bridge. I realized very quickly that I was zooming around these curves way faster than I'm sure I should have been, so I turned the music down and I slowed down. I'm about six miles from the bridge which means I'm almost to the gas station. As I drive down the road I faintly see the bridge in the distance lit up by the bright lights from the gas station about a quarter mile behind it. 

It's very foggy this evening as dusk approaches. Instantly, my eyes drifted to the right side of the bridge where I noticed a dark figure. It can't be, there is no way that it's the guy in the black hoodie. I'm just seeing things I have to be. I cruised past the  bridge without looking to my right to see if a real man was standing there. I didn't want to look because I just wanted to get my gas and go home to paint flowers with my baby sister. I pulled into the gas station next to gas pump number Five. Pump five is my favorite pump, it's easy to access, particularly for my car. I conned myself into paying at the pump with tap pay, because I didn't want to walk inside alone in case that guy had been following me with bad intentions. I figured I would be safer beside my car versus walking all the way inside and back out alone. I got out of my car, and proceeded to walk over to the pump to pay for my gas. 

Thirty dollars in the tank. The wait is on as the gas flows out of the pump into my gas tank. I am ungodly anxious, was I just seeing things or was there really someone there. I glanced around and my gaze met the bridge, I noticed the figure I saw wasn't there anymore. In a sense I felt relieved that whatever I saw was not there anymore. The gas pump made that little clicking noise it makes when your gas is fully pumped. It made me jump just a little bit. Probably because it interrupted my flowing train of thoughts. I grabbed my receipt quickly and got back into my car. I turned the key, my car sputtered a little bit but, that is normal I just have to pump the gas pedal a few times while turning the key then it will start. I got it started, thank god. 

I turned out of the gas station when I almost hit someone who was walking right in front of the gas station exit. I looked a little closer and wouldn't you know it's Vince. He is in dark Black jeans, a dark green hoodie partially unzipped with a white tee shirt underneath. He looks right at me as I am stopped in the middle of the exit lane. He put his hand up, I rolled my eyes and then rolled my driver's side window down to talk to him. 

“Hey, What are you doing”? I snapped at Vince.

“I am obviously walking home what the fuck does it look like, If you paid more attention you would have obviously seen me crossing the road”? 

“Don't be an asshole, I'm not in the mood for anyone's shit today. I was zoned out. I have had an anxiety filled day today alright. Obviously you have had a bad day too. Would you like a ride home”?

“A ride huh, Well that's quite a nice offer after almost hitting me”.

“Yes a ride take it or leave it, if you want the ride get in and if not why don't you get out of my way so I can go home”. 

“I'll take it, are you sure that you are okay giving me a ride home. That's awfully nice of someone that doesn't really know me and I sure wasn't nice to you when you smacked your face on my locker”.

“ Just tell me the directions or put your address in my GPS and we will just go. I'm clumsy. What can I really say? Come on, I apologized”.

“ Yeah I know, you did apologize. I'm also very sorry for being a dick but I don't need any rumors here than there already are about me”. Vince somberly replied to me. 

“ I understand, There definitely are rumors going around. I don't really believe what people say though I like to hear people's stories straight from them”.

“Let me see your phone, I'll put in the directions to my house. Please dont judge me when you get there. Maybe if you don't hate me I can tell you my story sometime”?

I handed Vince my Phone, honestly I cant believe that vince is really sitting in my car and even more I cant believe that he even apologized for being an asshole. I can't wait to tell Darcy about all this. I handed Vince my phone. 

Then I replied “ I'd love to sit down and hear your story whenever you have time to tell it”. 

“I will keep that in mind, Thank you for being kind. There's not many people like that anymore”. He kindly said with a soft voice. 

I smiled at him and continued driving down this long tree lined country road, it is very aesthetically pleasing if i'm being honest. The GPS said that we have about 20 more minutes to his house.  This is not really what I want to be doing right now but I'm not complaining well. I guess I am but I shouldn't be since Vince was all I could think about a few days ago. So here I am sitting here in the car alone with him. We get to the stop sign at the end of the road. I look at the GPS and it says that we have about 12 minutes. I got this nervous feeling as my GPS yelled at me to turn right. At this point it's starting to get really dark out. I looked both ways before I took the right turn onto the next road. I took the turn and started my way down the next dark country road, I decided to look over at Vince and he was gazing out the window just completely relaxed. Maybe I was nervous because I was in the car with this guy who is a completely new guy in town that I was completely gawking over since he came. 

“Hey! Do you see that! Stop the car!” Vince Yelled! 

Completely startled I slammed on my brakes thinking it was a deer or an animal of some sort. I could only wish that's what I was looking at but, I knew as soon as I stopped the car that it was far from what I was looking at.

[winterrose527]

Random question time. How long does it take you to get ready? How is it different for going to work vs going out for fun?

Oooh lovely to hear from you. I'm honestly so over this work day so delighted for the distraction.

So I feel like I'm writing a recipe because it's like "hmm active time or total time?" "store bought (day 2 hair) or from scratch (freshly washed)"? Can you tell already that you're going to regret asking me this question?

I work from home at a company that has a mix of remote and in office employees, but there is zero expectation that I will be on video for calls so my every day look takes approximately 0-10 minutes. I try to get my dog out for a walk before work (especially now because it's getting so hot here except in the mornings), so before that I'll switch from pjs to athleisure, brush my teeth and do skin care. I typically break that up to let products steep etc. but it takes little to no time. I typically stay in athleisure the rest of the day because I will try to get my dog out for another walk and recently got a walking pad and if I'm not doing that I'm sitting cross legged on my couch so want to be comfy.

Going out if I am washing my hair I ideally would like to have 3 hours but active time is probably something like an hour to an hour and a half. I'll take a shower and then let my hair dry for about an hour before I go to use any heat on it. Active time on my hair is about 15-20 minutes but I'll intersperse skin care in that so it probably stretches to a half hour and then my make up takes about 10-15 minutes. I've typically decided what I'm going to wear hours earlier so dressing takes about 5-10 minutes depending on whether the agonies rear their head.

This is honestly why WFH has genuinely given me so much LIFE back because my mornings are so special. They can either be leisurely (finishing a book, doing some writing of my own, catching up with a friend before our days start) or insanely productive (sometimes I like to rearrange my furniture or clean my entire house or handle stupid life things) but either way they are doing things that are helpful to ME rather than spent getting ready to sit at a cubicle [not knocking it for anyone else but I always found it so soul crushing that I would put so much effort in and was expected to given where I was working just to sit under bad lighting and not get up from my desk all day].

The TL;DR is that I basically like to block a lot of time so that I'm not rushed during any part of the process. I have a ton of anxiety and am very introverted so I always sort of need to be in the right solitary space before I go out, but the actual amount of what I'm doing isn't all that time consuming.

How about you?

[vincord]

5 12 and 35 for the artist ask game!

yaaaay more questions!! and sorry for the late response. ___

5. how would you describe your art style?

Already answered it here ^^ ___

12. describe your process while drawing

Usually it's constant nerves and a few hours spent just in front of an empty open file, because most often, even if I have an idea/ image in my head, it seems to me in advance that I won't succeed and I'll ruin everything, and then why even start.

I also often get distracted by social media or watching some random videos, I can just mindlessly switch between tabs on my laptop or walk around the room back and forth. I get distracted by games, I get distracted by toys, I get distracted by any random object that catches my eye. Therefore, it may take 4-5 hours, and at the same time I drew only a couple of sketch lines.

From time to time I record a speedpaint so that at least something keeps my attention on the drawing (like, "oh no, people are looking at me. I can't get distracted and I have to show that I'm really drawing.")

Sometimes it's tears, sometimes it's anger, sometimes it's the eternal transfer of art to the trashcan and back from the trashcan and back to the trashcan and back from and.

If we talk about the drawing process itself, then I usually do a primary sketch first to outline the main idea. Then I make another sketch the next layer, but more elaborate to indicate the details and so on. Then there are the lineart. After that, I make the main color for each detail in a separate layer and shading over everything on the same separate layers, after which I combine everything into one layer. After that, I add the effects. It happens that I add details, such as hairs, on top of the finished art.

For example:

Clear lineart is rarely saved anywhere, because, as I wrote earlier, at the end of the work I combine all the layers into one.

Sometimes I also draw an approximate arrangement of shadows. But this rarely happens.

If we talk about the art that I draw in another art program, then I draw everything there without sketches and on one layer. Just the way the hand goes. No difficulties with layers, details and a bunch of everything. Like

___

35. if you had one piece of advice to give your younger artist self, what would it be?

Never start drawing.

I remember as a child looking with big eyes at all these popular artists, whose audience was tens of thousands of people, and dreaming of becoming like them. I guess I just didn't get into the most successful era of the Internet, where my drawings were ridiculed by various people for a long time, including my loved ones, and my parents saw it as either a useless activity and "draw me a picture for free, otherwise I'll take all your gadgets and beat you," or they considered me as a bag of money that will make them rich.

As a result, drawing, I think, brought me more pain and unpleasant things than good emotions. Plus, all my life I've been doing is studying at art schools and colleges, where there's just an incredible race in terms of the number of works and their quality. And this further fuels my dislike of what I do.

I mean, I'm really glad that my art evokes emotions in people and in recent years, pleasant comments have finally begun to outweigh the negative ones. I've written about it enough times already and it's still true. But I guess I would just like to have as little of this negativity as possible.

I have a difficult relationship with drawing. So I don't even know what else I could say to my little version. Don't look at popular and cool artists as gods?? Yes, this, in general, can be recommended to absolutely everyone.

[maivalkov]

OK, but can we stop for a moment to appreciate the work you do with your fanfics?

I mean, this afternoon I was rereading some of your fics on AO3 and I landed on "Gatito". I looked at the date of the first publication and it's in 2018. whaaaaat?????!!!! i mean, it's incredible that a fic released 5 years ago is still alive and updated!!! i know there have been pauses, as is natural and necessary, but the amount of hours spent, the times you must have had to write, make drafts, rewrite, delete again until you've found what you were looking for, or at least an approximation. All this shows devotion and involvement and that's why I wanted to acknowledge the effort you have made and continue to make in updating and creating content despite how difficult it must be to reconcile it with work and personal problems. For this very reason, thank you.

The same applies to Zoute Drop. You started the story on 27 May 2021 and you're still updating! Girl, that's what you call perseverance :) And to all this, you have to add the special events like hetaweek or the special weeks to the ships, like Spuk, of whom you take the time to post fics.

Well, I've realised that I've come up with a long text hahahaha, it's not my intention to be heavy. I simply wanted to reflect on the time/effort/consistency that you dedicate to your works. (which are also incredible, the way you manage to capture the emotions of the characters and capture them in words so that those who read them can feel them; how you manage to maintain the tension at the end of each chapter and you manage to make my day happy every time you update a new chapter, and I'm convinced that this happens to all of us who read your creations ;)

Having said that, I hope you have a good night and the sweetest dreams 🤍 (and thank you again for every masterpiece that you upload)

I think praise really ought to be given to the attention and love you've poured into this ask, anon.

I have a lot of feelings about Gatito. It's witnessed my highs and lows, it's been a much-needed teacher in the ways of writing, and it's the reason I now call certain amazing writers 'friend'.

I'm incredibly grateful to that word child, and to those who've stuck with me all this time. I always wanted to see this fic through till the end, and I'm happy there are people willing to join me as we plod towards the finish line. :)

Zoute Drop feels considerably young in comparison, but now that you mention it, I guess it's getting on too, right? (Fear not. There's still plenty of time and chapters left in that one.)

I adore writing, as you've probably noticed. Events are a great outlet for the NedPort or EngSpa daydreams, or a whole new prompt I wouldn't normally consider. For anyone interested, on that note, I'll be taking part in @hetaberia-week very soon, and, for the first time ever... @hetaween-event later this year >:)

Thank you again for your kind words, I can't express how much it means. Despite reading the same fics time and again myself, I forget people might enjoy revisiting mine. It's a strange but wonderful feeling. If the stories I churn out provide something, whether that's a laugh or mild frustration as I leave you all on another cliffhanger (looking at you Gatito), then my work here is done. I'm glad you enjoy my fics, truly, and hope you have a wonderful day. 💖

[bloodelves88]

I Think I Don't Like Gaming Anymore

25 years. It's been approximately 25 years since I've started playing video games as a hobby. The games that left a memorable impression on me as a child or teenager were games like Red Alert 1, Doom, Starcraft, GTA: Vice City & San Andreas, Warcraft 3, Runescape, Little Fighter 2, Worms, Dragon Age, Mass Effect Trilogy, Assassin's Creed 1 and 2, Shattered Galaxy, Rakion, and probably a lot more that isn't surfacing to the top of my head right now.

I spent so much time playing these games. I didn't even play some of these games "properly" - I don't think I ever completed GTA: Vice City. All I ever did was muck around, blowing things up, and causing chaos. But somehow, I could spend hours doing it.

In Rakion (a PvP game), I spent hundreds of hours playing from level 1 to 10. I did that because players were matchmaked into three different level brackets. 1 to 10, 11 to 30, and 31+. Rakion was a free to play game with a cash shop, and pay to win reared its ugly head beyond level 10. So what I did was to always delete my character once it hit level 11, and just repeated everything within level 1 to 10. I had fun.

These days? I get bored and tired after an hour or two.

I started playing The Last of Us Part 1 a few days ago, and I'm already using a trainer to make things easier (i.e. cheat). I can't die, I have infinite ammo, and everything dies in one shot. But why, why am I doing such a thing?

Well, I've started to notice a particular set of feelings that arise within me whenever I play a video game nowadays. These feelings can be things like:

This is a chore

What a pain in the ass

This was only fun in the first hour of the game

This was only fun the first time I did it

What a waste of time

I just want to rush through it so that I can experience the story and complete the game

Crafting, gathering, ammo management, stealth, underwater areas, dark areas, it's all a chore to me nowadays.

Maybe an argument can be made that such mechanics aren't particularly fun to begin with, so my feelings might be understandable.

But what if these feelings extend to core gameplay mechanics?

Shooters - Shooting enemies from behind cover. Running from point A to point B. Getting headshots.

RTS - Collecting resources to build your base. Training up an army. Exploring the map.

MMOs - Travelling great distances. Earning gold. Doing dungeons and raids repeatedly to farm gear and rewards. Dealing with people. Doing dailies.

Core gameplay mechanics might not be a "chore", but they tend to drift towards "this is only fun in the first hour of the game".

I do have some guesses as to why I'm getting these feelings.

There's been no new core gameplay within video games for the past 5 years that have been really solid. I've tried Rollerdrome but it got old after a while. I haven't tried Hi-Fi Rush.

There's really nothing new, man. Every single game is just made up of the same few mechanics, wrapped up in a different skin. Fantasy, sci-fi, anime style. No matter how epic, cool, or amazing it looks, deep down it's just the same old thing all over again.

Games tend to do a very poor job to keep things fresh throughout the whole game. Once you've played a few hours of it, then you've experienced all the game has to offer gameplay wise.

I've been a story motivated gamer for quite a long time, and it's possible that what I've been seeking out are good stories and good experiences. Video games were just the vessel I used to obtain these.

It's also possible that all I wanted was a sense of progression, and the methods weren't important. This is probably why I enjoy mobile gacha games with auto-play functionality nowadays. You get to progress, but you don't need to actively grind. It basically removes the problems of it being a chore, a pain in the ass, and a waste of time. Yet it allows me to progress and experience the story (Honkai: Star Rail is so far, the best game in 2023 for me).

The video game industry, especially in the AAA space, is producing a lot of junk lately. I mean, check out this wall of shame: https://www.reddit.com/r/pcmasterrace/comments/13sjzft/we_would_like_to_apologize_please/

And even if the game isn't junk, it's filled with season passes and pay to win junk, still has to be bought before playing, and has none of the upsides of gacha games I mentioned above.

Everything is liked nowadays. My previous blog post: https://bloodelves88.tumblr.com/post/702607969068662784/everything-is-liked-nowadays

I'm just losing patience, growing old, getting tired, etc.?

I do still enjoy some new games though, but I'm not sure why. They don't seem to be that different, but I still enjoyed them from start to end. The Yakuza series, Horizon Zero Dawn and Forbidden West, The Final Fantasy VII Remake, and Final Fantasy XIV are examples of new games I enjoyed.

All in all, I'm still not sure what to make of these feelings I have. I think I want to set video games aside and play less of it, but it's not easy to just do that for a 25 year old hobby. I doubt I'll ever drop video games from my life completely, but to stop keeping up with video game news, to stop exploring and trying out most of the new games that come out every year - it's going to be a strange feeling. Old habits die hard.

[sigynpenniman]

My winning band recommendations from my 72 hour power metal fixation adventure

Plus other opinions I don’t have near the knowledge to have, various other thoughts and a link to Spicy Metal Takes: the google sheet; or, Girl who has only ever listened to Trans-Siberian Orchestra listens to other metal for the first time: Getting a lot of "Trans-Siberian Orchestra" vibes from this

I've never really listened to metal before. But Kenny got me listening to Versailles, and suddenly I'm considering for the first time in my life that I might like metal, or at least some metal. Then a couple days ago I got introduced to Gloryhammer (by a random suggested reddit post I think?), and then Alestorm. Very amused by the existence of incredibly seriously presented dwarf legend and pirate music, I combed threads of related bands, and someone recommended Rhapsody of Fire.

Here's the other thing you need to know about me: I love Trans-Siberian orchestra. Like, really love. I listen to TSO on repeat from September to January of every year. Few things on earth inspire the joy in me that Wizards in Winter does. So when I hit play on that first Rhapsody of Fire album and got hit with...well, Rhapsody of Fire, my whole world shifted on its axis. You're telling me this whole time there's been more Trans-Siberian Orchestra out there, without the Christmas, and I just didn't know about it because I don't listen to metal?

(this is why I am forever seeking out new music - statistically, the thing you are going to love most in the world is something you've never heard of yet)

Completionism, autism, and an academic fascination with music in general, and hungry for more of this magic, and the next thing I know I'm on Encyclopedia Metallum, Reddit, and Apple Music, scrolling related artist lists and suggestion threads collecting the very best of power metal. It ended up being so many bands I had to make a spreadsheet.

I've spent the last couple of days working my way through the spreadsheet and taste-testing all of the recommended bands. I figure out that the term for what I enjoy is Symphonic Power Metal, so that was my focus. My criteria was fairly simple: do I enjoy listening to this, would I listen to it on purpose, and does it make me start stimming happily the way TSO does.

So here's my fixation-fueled list of recommendations. I'll include a link to my actual google sheet at the bottom so you can all read my spicy metal takes and maybe laugh at me if you like metal and think my taste sucks (which it probably does, and I absolutely do not care if you think so).

RHAPSODY OF FIRE - If you like books with maps in them, can I interest you in a band who put maps in their CD BOOKLETS?

And their approximately 27 related, spinoff, and reboot bands. If you want to get into Rhapsody, check out this illustrated guide to the ROFECU (Rhapsody of Fire Extended Cinematic Universe) that a kind soul made on Reddit here. There is a huge controversy and drama among fans of the band about which is the "real" Rhapsody but I absolutely could not care less. They're all good, don't worry about it.

A film score orchestra handed several electric guitars. TSO on steroids. I don't even know how to do ROF justice in description alone.

Compositionally stunning, complex, gorgeous, orchestral and symphonic masterpieces overlaid with power metal, prog rock, and sometimes medieval music.

Here's the icing on the cake: ROF live for the concept album, and their dozen-plus album discography comprises at the moment 2 complete (and a 3rd still being actively recorded) Lord-Of-The-Rings level fantasy sagas told over 3-5 albums each, complete with MAPS IN THE CD CASES. These guys are NOT FUCKING AROUND. There are multiple long reddit threads and google docs detailing the plot outlines and timelines of each saga, including this 201 page behemoth. I've only scratched the surface here and I genuinely can't remember the last time I was so excited to have so much of something still ahead of me.

TWILIGHT FORCE - Can I copy your homework?

We're not Rhapsody of Fire, we promise! (and I mean this as a compliment.)

Twilight Force is a newer band, and therefore have a bit of a newer sound, but it's the closest thing to ROF out there - probably not by accident, since one of the band members was in one of the ROF spinoff bands. I haven't dug into their lore yet, but the music is spectacular, epic and sweeping and gorgeously composed.

VERSAILLES - Immortal vampire neoclassical VKei with a twist of Gender

If you haven’t ever heard of Versallies…now you have.

A really incredible, absolutely delightful visual kei band with a commitment to their very self-aware bit that takes them to the next level, Versallies make incredible, headbanging, neoclassical metal. Lead vocalist Kamijo has one of the most incredible voices you’ll ever hear, and the whole thing is enhanced greatly by their visuals - sumptuous costumes, full on anime hair, an a general Victorian-meets-rococo aesthetic that takes gender performance to a space of high art. There’s lore for the band too, but I don’t speak Japanese at all, so I haven’t gotten to all of it yet.

MALICE MIZER - high art VKei pioneers

90s Visual Kei band Malice Mizer are the foundational text of much which came after. You can really feel the effect of Dead or Alive’s Pete Burns here (who, legendarily, had an influence on the emergence of VKei due to his popularity in Japan) and everything happening is just beautiful. The least “metal” of everything on this list, Malice Mizer have more of a metal-flavored new wave sound. I highly recommend checking out these guys’ filmed concerts - the visual is half of the fun with VKei, and the number & broadness of the influences here is incredible - you can feel the push and pull of classical music, new wave, prog rock, metal, rococo aesthetics, goth, mime - it goes on and on. I haven’t gotten to spend as much time with this band as I want, and I feel like there’s more to understand, appreciate, and analyze than I’ll ever have enough hours for.

ALESTORM - Pirates. Yaar.

What do I even say about the kitsch pirate band other than that they’re a pirate band. And they’re…really, really good. Sea Shanties in metal form, metal music full of accordions, aggressively Scottish, and delightfully committed to theme. It's hard not to smile listening to this.

AVANTASIA - Opera Time

More rock operas than albums.

The other close-to-a-TSO clone on this list, Avantasia make symphonic rock operas. Another band I need more time with, there's some REALLY good stuff here if you like rock operas (which, clearly, I very much do).

KAMELOT - Pure Power Metal

Slightly less symphonic than the other choices (though there's still some violins in here), Kamelot is a more metallic and classic rock/epic rock sound with some killer vocals. There's something a little dated about their sound, but I mean that as a compliment.

POWERWOLF - Dad music

There's something delightfully 80s about this sound. Feels lifted directly from classic rock. This is your dad's music, and I mean that as a compliment.

STRATOVARIUS - Barely not Journey.

These guys go back and forth between being metal and sounding like Journey, but it's good. I approve.

AYREON - The English language is insufficient.

It feels like no matter which song I put here, it's going to be wrong - because no single song you listen to is going to give you a good picture of whatever the hell Ayreon is. The songs have a metal influence, but every song feels like a different genre - I would describe the overarching genre as closer to Prog Rock, but oh man, it is all over the place. The strangeness and all-over-the-place nature of it is fascinating. I was gratified to find that my inability to describe or even decide how I feel about this band is reflected in the band's actual Wikipedia article, which includes this incredible comment from a music reviewer:

"Idk man this shit defies description."

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

Epica - Incredible operatic vocals combined with black metal growls over a heavily orchestral metal background.

Opera Magna - these guys really only have the one album but it's heavily classical and really good.

Fairyland, Deridian, Dragony, Dark Moor - All very similar sounding "symphonic power metal but not quite as good as ROF"

Sabaton - some really good power metal around historical war themes. Well made, but I am not super interested in the thematic content so it doesn't hit.

MY ACTUAL SPREADSHEET:

Tier: classic tier list tier - S, A, B, C, D, E, F

Library Tier - a simpler, more subjective system I added for myself - would I save this into my music library, would I only put it on a playlist for a specific mood, or do I just not plan to listen to it again?

A complete list of the bands I taste tested with my ratings and notes. I have literally no previous knowledge of this genre. My taste and opinions might be bad, they might be awful, I do not care. I hope you all enjoy them anyway.

[fyonnkalnonn]

I'm bored, so here's my top ten games of 2022. Some of these aren't from this year. Sue me.

10. DRAINUS - Ha ha, yes, the title is very funny. Absolutely gorgeous scrolling shooter, a little bit like if Gradius didn't hate you. Go play it. If you're not into the genre, it's pretty much the perfect entry point - I'm merely below average at the genre and at this point I can sleepwalk through the game deathless.

9. Guilty Gear Strive - It's Guilty Gear Strive! What do you want from me? It has Sol Badguy! And Testament! And Jack-O! You know, from the Jack-O pose? And Bridget! It's got What Are You Fighting For and Armor-Clad Faith and Disaster Of Passion and Play The Hero and Perfection Can't Please Me and Love The Sub-Human Self and The Town Inside Me and like! It's Guilty Gear Strive! My favorite fighting game and technically also my favorite album of the year.

8. Resident Evil 4 VR - RE4 is SO LONG. You do not understand this until you are enduring back pain from playing it for the sixth day in a row. And the castle sewers? Terrifying. Regenerators? Actually pretty chill in VR because your aim, as a regular untrained human being, is approximately 3000% better than vanilla RE4 Leon's.

7. Triangle Strategy - How do you feel about POLITICS? Do you want to learn about the tensions introduced by nigh-monopolized trade of salt and iron between three nations? Do you also want distinctive and interesting units that Final Fantasy Tactics would kill for? Are you good with nearly forty-five minutes of dialogue between battles? You should play this game.

6. CRUELTY SQUAD - I have never played a game infused with more of the developer's vitriolic anger at the status quo in my entire life. Truly wretched punk art, not for the faint of heart or narrow of aesthetic sensibilities. A user interface that hates you. You can get a Death surgery that replaces your Life bar with a Death bar. An absolute must-play.

5. TUNIC - A game so good that playing it forces you to re-evaluate every Zelda game like "yeah, but is it as good as TUNIC?" Includes the single most extensive and satisfying puzzle I've ever solved in a video game.

4. Get In The Car, Loser! - The best JRPG you haven't heard of. Extremely good combat inspired by FFXIII and Valkyrie Profile. Incredible writing. Sentences burned into my soul permanently. Deeply queer, righteously angry, and maybe the game on this list that means the most to me on a personal level.

3. Vampire Survivors - The ultimate video game. Looks like trash. You'd never buy it unless someone told you ahead of time that, no really, we all did put 50+ hours into THAT, and we're not joking.

2. Signalis - Master class in style, story telling, and classic survival horror gameplay. Had to play it twice to figure out the sequence of events. You jump down several holes. Best game in its genre since Silent Hill 2

1. Elden Ring - What did you expect? I've played it for 300 hours across something like eight different builds. I beat it in 107 hours, in 6 hours, in 70 hours, in 32 hours. One time I spent ten hours grinding for an extremely rare variant drop of a partciular piece of chest armor because I wanted my INT build to cosplay as the femme version of Link from the Japanese 1987 strategy guide for Zelda 1. It's maybe the best video game ever made, and if you thought number 1 was going to be anything else, you slept through 2022.

[nathank77]

10/31/24

10:32 a.m

It's been approximately 365 since I was forced against my will to spend a night in the psych ward and it permanently fucked me up. I'm trying not to dwell... but it's hard not to remember that I microslept and all the events that I'm now having flashbacks to that occurred this day approximately 1 year ago. I remember everything so vividly. I remember i hadn't slept for 4 days. I remember what time I was admitted. I remember what lead to me going to the e.r. I remember what I told them. I remember everything. And I mean everything.

I'm truly trying not to dwell but talking about things helps..considering i don't really have a therapist anymore. Erin stopped seeing me. Mike is sick and cancels legit every single week. And the new therapist canceled 3 times out of 5 appointments....... I didn't have therapy last week..i haven't had therapy this week. So all I have is tumblr.

Anyways I'm trying a new statin as of yesterday night. I have to take it 3 days a week... to try to mitigate side effects..... my wrist hurts... technically I couldn't have slept on it wrong. I feel potentially muscle weakness... idk....... I mean that's the problem.... before starting it I would occasionally have a muscle spasm. Or a sore neck or something from like sleeping on it wrong. Or muscle spasms bc of dehydration/stress/anxiety/caffeine. It makes it hard to know whether or not I am having side effects or if I am anxious and having tactiles....

I realize something very important. I don't have things to do. I mean just laundry, cooking, showering, running errands like grocery shopping.

What does that mean? All i have time to do is have anxiety. All I have time to do is freak out about thing, overthink and create side effects.....my wrist could hurt bc I slept on it wrong, it could hurt from doing the pumpkins. It could hurt from the statin too.

I mean it's problematic. I'd really rather not go on injectables... as a transguy, as happy as I am about testosterone I think about my testosterone it makes me remember it's a commitment to life long injections... or at least creams and gels which I've tried and don't like. The injection is ideal for many reasons. I can't transfer the gel onto someone else. I don't have to put it on everyday.

But as a transguy I truly understand the commitment it is to have to do biweekly injections for the rest of my life. Even if I get my ovaries removed.... id go into menopause in my 30s if I were to stop testosterone...

Of course this injectable medication is different.... but it's a commitment and not one im positive i want to do.

Yet as I'm typing my thumbs hurts... I feel as though it's hurt before.... cause I mean this generation is prone to arthritis.... being a gamer, someone who writes, and someone who texts and uses my phone.

I haven't met anyone. Life doesn't get better and I'm really considering running away since this dog is permanently here with my monthly check and getting that Airbnb and ending it.

I don't have anything to live for. If I was a someone i would pop a new medication. Go to work, pick the kids up, make dinner. And if I was to have anxiety about the side effects sure I could have some... but I'd have less time to dwell and worry about it.

I want to change my diet cause my cheese intake is disgusting and I know it contributes to my chlorestoral..

Sleep was awful last night. I had a dream where I woke up at 8:30 a.m and my alarms never went off. Idk how many hours i got. I must have gotten between 5-7... but falling asleep took a while.

The two nights before, I struggled to fall asleep, it took a while but I did.

Tonight I'm giving myself a tiny bit more xanax since it's the year mark of having spent a night in the psych ward...

I'm wondering how my thyriod is doing. As I'm hungry more frequently... and living behind the barricade I'm sure helps... but there is also another anxiety....what if I'm right and my mother would rather me live behind this barricade until Riley dies and this is my new life. Feeling like I don't matter at all to my family..

I wish I had something to do except have anxiety. I wish I was a someone. I wish the dog would leave..I hope the statin works out.

But it's like sometimes I wake up with neck pain cause I slept funny and id never say it was white mulberries or lions mane.... so it's like a catch 22. I'm hyper vigilant and anxiuos and anxiety can create muscle spasms. And I also have tactile hallucination still.

I feel like my life is purposeless. And I should end it before it gets worse.

[nanalovesbubbles]

Happy Thursday!

Good evening everybody! I've been so wapped with everything that I've been neglecting my daily reflections 😔. Although it's coming a bit late, here's my post for Thursday!

I woke up after a short night of sleep, approximately 5 hours as I had some trouble actually falling asleep that night. As per what is starting to become usual, I felt nuseous when I woke up. I scrambled to get up in the morning, and zipped down the hill to spend another lovely morning at kerckhoff Patio. I was feeling a little sore after some physical exercise I had done the previous night, which led to me feeling tired throughout the day. Despite that, I felt really good about my LS30A lecture, and I really liked the lecture. In fact, I attended office hours and got staarted on the homework for ht enext week. i really enjoyed going to the office hours; I learned a lot more than I thought I would, and made some new friends that are also my classmates. after that, I spent some more time at the Patio, got some lunch, and spent some time with friends. I got closer with a newer friend of mine ,and we bonded over a shared experience! Finally, I ended my afternoon by attending a fair for graduate and professional schools. I returned to my dorm, and spent a good portion of time structuring a paper I had for my Japan 75 class. Here's the daily wter time lapse :D!

[uhhhhmanda]

15 questions, 15 people

I was tagged by @fr-wiwiw! I was sure I had done this one but I can't find it on my blog so I probably did what I usually do, which is to agonize over every answer and then delete it halfway through, lol. So let's try again!

1. Are you named after anyone?

Yes! Spock's mother! Thank you, dad, for loving Star Trek and convincing my mom not to name me Kelsey Dawn.

2. When was the last time you cried?

Hold on, let me check my watchlist. I don't cry a lot (an interesting change that has happened in the last 10 years or so) but I know I just cried recently when I was watching a drama or a movie ... Ah! It was You Are My Secret, the cdrama.

3. Do you have kids?

No. My husband and I agree wholeheartedly on no human children. We've got two dogs and a cat that I'm way too attached to, though.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

I have made a concerted effort to cut back. Now it's mostly just in texts to my husband.

5. What's the first thing you notice about people?

Depends on the person and the situation. Sometimes height, sometimes hair, sometimes clothes. If they are talking it might be a cool accent or interesting word choice or voice. Everyone is interesting in their own way.

6. What's your eye colour?

Hazel!

7. Scary movie or happy ending?

I love horror, so oth is ideal, but if I can't have happy I will take scary over sad. A sad ending can drag me down for a long time after a movie/show/book, but a scary one is fun to keep thinking about.

8. Any special talents?

Understanding thick accents (which is wild because I have auditory processing issues -- if you speak perfect English you are harder for me to understand than if you have an accent that a TV station would caption. the human brain is mysterious af).

9. Where were you born?

In a small town an hour north of Seattle, WA.

10. What are your hobbies?

Writing, reading, drawing, cooking, photography, watching Asian dramas. Once in a blue moon I post a vlog.

11. Do you have pets?

I have two dogs who are both approximately the same percetage of pit bull and german shepherd (they aren't related, we got dna tests) but their genes expressed in opposite directions, so Geordi looks like a pointy pit bull and Pepper looks like a short-haired GSD. We also have a weird cat named John Enwistle who overgrooms himself so that he looks like he's wearing a little bolero jacket or a crop top.

12. What sports do you/have you played?

I wanted to try soccer when I was little because one of my brothers was a soccer player. But no one told me the rules? Ever? And also mom wouldn't let me quit the team when it turned out that I fucking hated being watched by everyone's parents? So I spent the entire season standing on the corner of the field ignoring everything. Kind of a formative experience. It's on my Mention To Therapist list for when I finally can afford therapy.

13. How tall are you?

5'5"

14. Favourite subject in high school?

English.

15. Dream job?

I would love to make money off my art but I'd have to uhhhhh MAKE SOME ART to do that but I've got dysfunctional executives. Other things I'd love to do for money: forensic document examiner, architect, or book indexer.

I think everyone I want to see answer this has been tagged, but if you want to play PLEASE DO!