#I've made peace with it she can't be saved we just have to make her worse

[outeremissary]

Tagged by @turbulentpumpkin43. Thank you! Although I know I've got a lot of stuff I haven't finished, I'm doing my best to be prompt with new stuff.

rules: shuffle your 'on repeat' playlist and post the first ten tracks, then tag ten people!

(Emi note: I have come to understand that "on repeat" is a Spotify thing, so tonight the method is that I'm going to do my verrrrry best to remember stuff I've looped a lot recently and we're all going to super duper trust me that it's like, analogous.)

Thunder N' Rain - Hammer No More the Fingers (YouTube | Spotify)

Judgment in the Sixtieth Year ~ Fate of Sixty Years - ZUN (YouTube | Spotify)

To the Last Drop of Blood - Beast in Black (YouTube | Spotify)

Lay Down - Priestess (YouTube | Spotify)

Ride or Die - The Knocks (feat. Foster the People) (YouTube | Spotify)

The Purge March (Amane's Second Trial) - DECO*27, TeddyLoid (YouTube | Spotify)

Yin Yang Relationship - Wadatakeaki (YouTube)

Austerity - Katatonia (YouTube | Spotify)

I Really Want to Stay at Your House (Turbo eurobeat remix) - Rosa Walton (YouTube)

Dancing Samurai - Kanimiso-P (YouTube)

If interested, @camelliagwerm, @bearvanhelsing, and @mountainashfae?

[10yrsyart]

Logos- the Word of God Erebos- darkness, gloom

i don't remember where i heard this analogy, but it really stuck with me. you can't stay on the fence of belief/ unbelief forever, because the devil owns the fence. he owns all the religions of the world, except for the only faith that can save you: faith in the blood of Jesus Christ. the Son of God came down, lived a sinless life, took our sins upon Himself in death, and resurrected so we might have life too. because He LOVES us.

the truth is, you don't know when the end of your life will be. when you come to stand before the Just and Righteous Judge, will you be covered by Jesus' perfect blood, shielding you from punishment? or will you still have all your sins covering you because you rejected Him?

i don't write this to condemn, but because i love you and want you to have an eternity of joy and peace. so i warn you with love: Jesus is returning soon, to take His people away before God's Wrath and judgement begins (Revelation 3:10, 1 Thessalonians 5:9).

signs in the sun, moon, and stars. wars and rumors of wars, people's love for each other turning to hate. the increased intensity of natural disasters and strange behavior of animals. every other week some expert talks of world distinction events in our future (AI, or famine, or disease, or WWIII). God has sent dreams and visions to all people about the times about to happen. you can feel there's something weird about the world right now. God is speaking loudly.

now is the time to repent, accept the sacrifice for your sins and put your faith in Him. now is the time to step into the Kingdom of Life that will never pass away 💙✝ "For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, so that whoever believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life (...) There is no judgment against anyone who believes in Him. But anyone who does not believe in Him has been judged already, for not believing in God's one and only Son." (John 3:16, 18)

transcript:

Helel: What did they say that gripped your attention so much?

Girl: Prince Helel. She was just telling me about life in the Logos Kingdom compared to the Erebos Kingdom. I haven't really decided where I want to live yet.

Helel: Pffeh, I can assure you, she greatly exaggerate. I've been to the Logos Kingdom. Those people are practically in chains and they don't even realize.

Girl: ..But you rule the Erebos Kingdom. Doesn't that make you a little bias? Either way, I'd still like to decide for myself.

Helel: Of course, of course! Take all the time you want. We'd love to have you!

(years pass)

Girl: Helel, what's happening?!

Helel: That, my dear, is a curtain call.

Girl: I don't understand-

Helel: It's time you came with me.

Girl: Wait-! But I never picked a kingdom! I'm still on the fence-

Helel: Oh, I'm terribly sorry for the confusion! You see, I OWN the fence!

Girl: No! Get off me! I thought I had more time! Stop-!

Girl: King Yeshua!!

Helel: No, sshe'sss mine! Sshe waited too long-

Yeshua: (Release her. Serpent.)

Helel: (Fine. But they won't all want sssaving~)

Girl: Thankyou, thankyou, he almost had me! If You didn't... I'm so sorry. Please don't send me back to him-

Yeshua: I came to you when you called, didn't I? You made your decision. And I'm so Glad! Allow Me to welcome you home, Dear One.

[taggedmemes]

SENTENCE MEME BALDUR'S GATE 3 / PART SIX

leave us in peace and we shall leave you in kind.

cut the crap.

we just want to go home.

enough of this charade.

i'll not play pretend anymore.

you'll soon learn what it means to ally yourself with the likes of this garbage.

i'm free now, and i'm never going back.

fuck them.

felt good letting off a little steam.

if i burn any hotter, i might explode.

don't get too close until i've found a way to calm down.

it's a bit early to be getting into tragic backstories.

let's save the scar-show for later after we've worked up an appetite for tragedy.

in the grand scheme of things, i'm inconsequential [to her].

she favored me like a child favors a captive pet.

it had the makings of a good stage show, but i did not want to be one of the players.

torture, bloodsport? or perhaps just a good old-fashioned walloping?

you owe me nothing.

i could extort you, if that's what you want.

you're teasing me now.

ignorance is alive and well it seems.

don't make me get the wooden spoon.

you'd best have one hells of an apology for me.

if you think your precious little god holds any power here, you're in for a surprise.

do you treat all your guests so poorly?

i don't like busybodies.

you are as thick as they come.

are you telling me you made love to a goddess?

i shared a bed with a goddess and yet i wasn't satisfied.

shall i share the story behind it or would you rather head straight to its sordid finale?

how are you still alive?

we've come this far together and we'll continue on together.

even i am tired of the sound of my own voice.

i'll rip your spine out of your asshole.

i'll use your blood to spice my stew.

i'll keep you alive until i've sucked the marrow from your bones.

killing me is a waste of time.

you bastard, you ruined everything.

this is an interesting way of thanking me.

a slap is all you deserve.

a hag was never going to help you.

they don't help anyone but themselves.

that double-crossing, filthy, lying hag.

focus on the positive.

forgive the aroma.

perhaps that is why i have survived so long where more fearsome peers have not.

your loyalty is admirable but misplaced.

his kind have charm beyond our mortal means to resist.

who'd keep a secret like that from his friends?

you can't trust anyone these days.

even in the middle of nowhere, he can reach me.

why do you insist on exhuming the past?

people think the biggest threat to a vampire is a cleric with a stake.

they're scheming, paranoid, power-hungry beasts.

i am what i must be, says what i must be.

how does it feel to be a devil?

i can't tell if you're being silly or serious.

you have to admire the man's ambition.

i promise i will not betray your trust.

you kept me by your side despite the menace i am.

i learned quick how to stay alive.

to feel invincible again.

this isn't where i thought i'd end up.

maybe when this is all done, you can show me where you came from.

i'm not normally one to begrudge someone their secrets, but..

i'm already blessed to have you at my side.

don't you cut a fine figure.

i am not some lower city coinlad offering you a tumble.

there is nothing so depressing as learning one's true value.

i could use someone with your skills.

they're ravenous predators with fangs like daggers.

it's hardly an irrational fear to harbor.

you've been decent to me, so far.

everyone's got their own fears.

maybe that's what i like about you.

all of this was for nothing.

if you're here to help, get to the fight quickly.

gods, i thought you were one of those beasts.

i'm not chasing after it, if that's what you're thinking.

the little beast's charming once you get accustomed to the smell of rotting flesh.

[local-lamppost]

Initial thoughts cause it's 4am

Spoilers

First off, wow... it's really good. I've been saying that if season 2 is as good as season 1 Arcane would be my new favorite show and we are on track. Anyway, just gonna list stuff until I can process/rewatch a billion times

Mel lived! I was so certain that they would just kill her off, make that Ambessa's motive (give Jayce a reason to keep fighting the Undercity) but it's much more interesting keeping her involved in the narrative. Love her trying to bother understand and undermine her mother. Those Black Rose guys best not have hurt a hair on her perfect head.

Speaking of. What in the Utena are these Black Rose magic people? I love the look of their magic. I wonder how they can corrupt people. Is it a spell? Do they slip them something?

Love how the divide of Jayce and Viktor was done. Jayce betrayed Viktor's wishes of destroying the Hexcore. Last season, Viktor wanted to forget about using the core to save himself after Sky and begged Jayce to destroy it when the core wouldn't allow Viktor himself to do it. In Jayce's mind though, the core is the solution to Viktor's problems. He didn't know it killed Sky or that it can influence Viktor, but all Viktor can comprehend is that Jayce didn't trust him. Didn't keep his promise. And this is fresh off of Jayce's season 1 antics against the Undercity, so Viktor's faith in his partner was already shaken. Viktor's also comfortable in his mortality/death, even though he wants to prolong it like every other human, but Jayce can't fathom loosing Viktor-the man who saved his life and made his dreams reality.

(Side note: Am I a JayVik shipper? I never considered myself one, but after writing this...)

JINX HAS A KID! I love this choice. Give Jinx a kid so she is able to learn what Silco and Vi had to go through with her, that no matter how big or dangerous a scheme to take this child into account. The confrontation in ep 3 really showed what Jinx will have to consider now that this kid's decided to adopt her as an older sister or something. Especially nice detail of how Vi-who has always had to consider the kids in her life-immediately stops fighting and starts looking for ways to keep the kid safe.

I was wondering how Jinx would loose a finger and Caitlyn shooting it off to save Vi is just- The fact that the only way these two can show they care about Vi when it comes to each other is by hurting the other.

Sevika's new arm is fantastic. It's a peace offering from Jinx, but also a way for Jinx to feel better (it was something she could fix). The mechanics of it are really fun. It reminds me of Kite's weapon from HxH with how it didn't always work/give her what she wanted in the fight. I especially love the victory rockets and built in theme song.

Ambessa is so interesting. Between her character song to the introduction of just what she is fighting against, I am very intrigued. She reminds me of Cersei Lannister, except she loves her kids as more than just extensions of herself (as of what we've seen, but I think that'll stick). Her using Salo to establish herself-which also keeps Mel safe by distancing her-but also dropping him in order to prop up Cait at her first opportunity is such a clever move. She truly is the fox and the wolf, but she is above all a mama bear.

Not much to say about Heimerdinger or Ekko yet, but I am definitely curious to see what they do about the wild runes with Jayce. The three of them have a fun dynamic, what with Heimerdinger still being peeved about magic/being ousted, Ekko hating topside and having a new reason to do so with them poisoning his tree, and Jayce being recently seperated and divorced from both his partners.

Vi is an enforcer. I didn't know how they were gonna handle this, but they did it so well. Of course she wants to fix things for the people her sister hurt. She feels responsible. She can say she doesn't blame herself, but how true is that? Why else would she be wearing a badge if not for her guilt? She is desperate to do something right and being an enforcer seemed to be a way to make Cait happy, get her gauntlets (what she believes is necessary to make any kind of change), and be first in line in the hunt for Jinx. She says that her sister is dead, that Jinx is a desecration to Powder's memory, that they are not sisters but isn't it supposed to be 'nothing is going to change that'? How much of all this is just something Vi is telling herself to keep going? Cait is her motive right now, but after ep 3 I definitely see why she starts spiraling.

(2 Side note: Her new best friend/drinking buddy is such a real one. They have a bender in the gutter together and now he's following her into and out of the enforcers. I wonder if he knew Vander? In any case, he is a delight.)

Cait and Vi kissed... CAIT AND VI KISSED! Then NOTHING HAPPENED AFTER! NOTHING! No immediate break up, nope.

So Cait. I love Cait and I am hyped for her arc this season. I am ready to fight tooth and nail for her. I am a Caitlyn defender. So what she's being manipulated into leading a military state due to her grief/unresolved anger/guilt/Ambessa being better at this than her, she looks amazing in her cape. It balances.

Seriously though, the writing for Cait especially is so solid. She is desperate to hold herself and her family together, to protect her city. She still wants to protect the innocent, to heal the Undercity, but her anger at a select few of those she wants to help is clouding the greater image for her. Vi seems to be acting as her better half, the side that cares for the innocent-the protector. Ambessa is the agressor, encouraging Cait to take drastic military action against the Undercity as a whole. Vi's disillusionment with Cait is due to the fact that Cait desire to heal, not harm, is what caused her to fall for Cait to begin with. To see more than some privileged topside enforcer, but a woman who genuinely cared and was willing to abandon her peaceful naivety to learn for the greater good of strangers.

I'll also point out that they separate when Cait starts blaming Vi for them loosing Jinx. Before, everyone but Cait put responsibility on Vi, she was supposed to be the one to help lighten the load and absolve some of the guilt. Now Cait is becoming another one of those who slam the blame on Vi. She changed. Why does everyone around VI change?

Can't wait for the next batch of episodes.

[sickofthis666]

Another thing that my mom told me today that I've found pretty depressing (and that is feminism-related): (2)

— When comparing her experience with her current lover vs my dad (25 years of marriage):

"I'm not used to not fighting all the time. It must have been two or three years since I've been in a fight."

With my father, there would always be a fight sooner or later. On average, it was every two or three days. At the best of times, we would get maybe a week of peace. In the worse cases, there would be a fight every day.

I hear you say: "it takes two to tango."

Well, you don't know my dad. He always found reasons to fight. You could be minding your business one minute, and the next he would barge in and makes a list of everything that was wrong with you. No matter what you did. Criticism after criticism after criticism. Even if you started to do the contrary to avoid unpleasant remarks, he'd criticize you for doing to opposite of what he criticized before! On the morning of my 13th birthday, he spent an hour lecturing me on how they couldn’t afford to buy me a mobile phone. (I was a reasonable kid, I gave up on the phone very quickly). Then the same day, the afternoon, he took me to a store to buy said phone.

"Just leave" is what you'd do to avoid conflict, right? You can’t avoid the criticism, you can’t win the argument (I tried so many times, it only make things worse, to the point where you just sit there in silence and take it because at least it's not as bad as it could be). Makes sense, right? Oh, but no. No, you can’t leave. He'll follow you. In the next room, on the other floor, even outside. If you ask to be left alone, he won't listen. (That doesn't apply to him though. He decides when the argument is over.) I once locked myself into the bathroom because it was the only room with a lock (he threatened to remove my bedroom door despite me being a teenage girl at the time), the only way to breathe, and he went to pick up tools and started to unbolt it.

I wanted to cry when my mom told me that. It was so surreal. Of course I knew about her fights with my dad, better than anyone (most of the time the fights would happen in the evenings, in front of my bedroom door because it was the "crossroad" between the kitchen, living room (the two rooms where my dad spent most his time) and my parents bedroom (where my mom was)).

But to hear that she was so used to it, that not fighting felt abnormal to her? It makes me want to cry, to break things, to beat up my dad, to turn back time and make it so they never meet, even if it means I'd never be born.

My mom was a smart, wise, and careful young woman. Every single one of her pregnancies was wanted and planned. She meticulously made the decisions to first finish her studies, then get a stable job, then get married, then have kids. The studies for a stable, well paying job. The job to be independant and not rely on a man. The marriage to have kids in a stable relationship. Everything should have gone smoothly.

But there was one thing she couldn’t have planned— no one could have, and it was that 10 years down the road, my father would become abusive.

First she couldn’t leave because her children were too young. Plus, that's the things with abusers, they're not always awful. They alternate. So you think it was a one time fluke. You think the man calling you crazy and stupid on a daily basis will turn back into the man you fell in love with. You think the man who routinely terrorizes your kids will turn back into the loving father he once was. It's a human thing, to hope. After all, if he changed for the worse, why couldn’t he change for the better?

By the time she realized he was only getting worse, it was too late. He accumulated so much shared debts and loans that she couldn’t leave.

There's a french book about domestic violence, and how the judicial system finishes off battered women rather than save them, whose title I can't forget.

Madame, il fallait partir.

Ma'am, you needed to leave. Or, Ma'am, you should have left.

[tuliptiger]

I just have a scene/idea stuck in my about the possible future of Vi and Jinx. I have no idea how their reunion would go, I want to genuinely believe that we will get one in the first place though.

Runeterra is a huge world, with a lot going on. In the great words of Ekko, "Your ideas change the world". I don't think Jinx escaped to fade into obscurity. Although I'd love for her to settle down and have a safe, loving and peaceful life surrounded by people who love her because she deserves that, I don't think we are there lol.

She still has a lot of experiences to have, places to change and people to influence. I really, really don't know who she is at the end of the show and I'm so excited to find out. I do know she has a better idea of who she is than she did at the start though. We've just started her story, literally. We got the start, and the end of the start but she has an entire life to live, she's like what 19-20 at the end of season 2?

Anyway, the scenario I've got in my head is Jinx gets involved in some crazy event in one of the other regions. It could literally be any of them, but her involvement is kept low key initially until the final, history changing event when everyone across the region celebrates all those that helped make it happen.

I can't stress enough, Jinx would be integral and a major shift of battle but she isn't the main lead. She's not "the hero" or group of heroes, she isn't a symbol anymore. She's a friend, she is... "I saw something important to me and I have to protect that here", she's "I didn't want to get involved but I made a friend and I can't walk away now".

Anyway, towards the end word starts getting around outside of the region and it makes its way to Piltover and Zaun and the change is noticeable. Most people are celebrating in the streets for solidarity for the changed region, some celebrating the fact that Jinx, their hero, is alive. The news spreads fast until it finally makes its way to Vi and Caitlyn (although she knew/had a suspicion long before news broke, she's smart as a whip and has excellent deduction skills).

Skipping over to Jinx, I still don't see her staying at any one place for too long. I think she'd finish what she needed to, help the people she wanted to help, and here's what's stuck in my head. I think she'd have a lot of growth, a lot of time to come to terms with all of her trauma, decisions, and just how bat shit crazy her life had been. How hurt she was and how she hurt others. I think at the resolution of the conflict, she'd decide to make her way back to visit Vi in Piltover.

To let her know she's alive and to see if Vi took her own worth and happiness seriously. (I think she trusted Caitlyn in the end, to be worthy of helping Vi do this tbh). And selfishly to see Vi again, for herself and HER own happiness finally.

I think it would be really funny, if Vi and Caitlyn having heard the news before Jinx actually arrived, were relatively prepared for Jinx' arrival. Caitlyn would see something in Jinx's action across the world to suspect her coming back to visit. After a long discussion between the two about what it could mean with Jinx coming back, long term or short term, Vi is %100 invested in fucking with her sister. And maybe to get her back a little bit for making her think she died to save her. That could not...have been easy to deal with.

Jinx would try to be sneaky and clever about it, subtle since she just wanted to check in on Vi. Gain some info and see if there was a good time or moment to pop in, she'd almost lose her nerve a couple times. Until Caitlyn looks directly at her through her and Vi's window when she was doing her rounds. Caitlyn gives a little smile and wave, and gestures behind her. Jinx is on top of a 3 story roof and almost falls from the shock of it (she thought she was doing a good job). She catches herself and turns to get the fuck out of there and face plants right into a familiar and solid body. With familiar and solid arms wrapping around her a little too tight, she instantly melts into it and she knows immediately who it is.

Not how she pictured this going but nothing in her life is ever what she expected it to be. They have a very, very heartwarming reunion with lots of tears and hugs involved. After they have their private moments Vi invites Jinx into her house. Jinx spends the rest of the night talking with Vi and Caitlyn. I think she'd spend a good chunk of time with them, getting caught up in local happenings with the twin cities and with Caitlyn and Vis lives.

Some time talking with Vi about... everything. Everything that happened and about leaving her after Vander. About the future, how Jinx can't stay long term but she can leave on more mutual terms this time. Calmer terms. Vi is just happy she's alive, incredibly grateful she came back to see her, to let her know she's alive and that it seems she's doing better. While she's worried to death about Jinx, she's also incredibly proud of her sister, proud for all the good she can do, always knew she could do, and how capable she really is on her own out there.

I think sometime after the first reunion, Vi would go on short trips with Jinx to places outside of Piltover. Or go visit her wherever she is, on the rare occasion Caitlyn could take time off to also go with Vi for shorter trips. Especially if Jinx is in a region Caitlyn has to do business with, Jinx will take the time to check in with Caitlyn and see what's up. Sister-in-law style shenanigans are not off the table.

I think they'd kick ass together frankly and this is completely self indulgent, obviously. In my head this is much more detailed, there's gravity to the scenes and they're as in character as I picture them to be. Do you see my vision, can you picture it? I want them to be happy and change the world and change each other's world for the best. I want the love to have been worth it 😭 There is enough crazy magical bullshit in the world, enough champions and heroes to take care of the rest of the heavy lifting for Runeterra. They can have a little time to enjoy living and being loved.

[ca-suffit]

No offense to Sam but the way he's been talking about Lestat lately is ... troubling, to say the least. He did an interview with Screenrant and he legit said that Lestat's abuse of Louis was "probably not as violent an act as Louis made it out to be in season 1." That's a direct quote, by the way. I understand that a lot of Lestat fans have their rose-colored glasses on and they're not the only ones, sure. However, when you have the actor saying things like this, are we really surprised Lestat fans are just as willing to turn a blind eye and act as if he's this innocent beacon of sunshine whose word is the gospel truth? I can't include links but you can search up Sam Reid and Screenrant on Google and the article should pop up.

ya, I've seen that quote (article and text at the bottom of this post).

if this fandom was full of critical thinkers the way ppl always luv to claim, we'd be able to discuss these things and even say maybe these actors say dumb, harmful shit sometimes. assigning sam reid the new role of anne rice stand in, coming from ppl who already have an unhealthy relationship with her, usually going back decades, is why trying to do anything here is p useless.

this fandom will never know peace bcuz instead of focusing on the fact harm was done, racist fandom has to keep digging and victim blaming black characters bcuz how could the white character do this, it's ooc, it's bad writing, it's not what anne rice would have done (except she did lol but there's always an excuse for why that doesn't count).

there's a lot of things the fandom could be talking about but instead it's gonna be tossing this quote up forever as "the truth" and it's gonna be like 50 year olds in the fandom doing it too. embarrassing tbh.

One of my favorite moments in the episode is Lestat apologizing over the cloud gift move from last season. It's powerful and moving, and yet so frustrating because the trial carries on like nothing after. Can you talk about playing that scene with Jacob?

Sam Reid: Yeah, I think we kind of had to make sure it [landed]. I don't want it to be like, "Yeah, but actually, it's not such a big deal. He apologized, and it's over now," which is what Claudia said. It's probably not as violent an act as Louis made it out to be in season 1, but I think the fact that Lestat did something to him that is so out of his nature was driven by the extent to which they love each other.

Lestat was driven to the point that he didn't fully even recognize himself, and he saw from his own hands an action that was unforgivable. You've physically hurt the person that you love so much that you no longer feel like you deserve to be with them. He knew that, and I think the thing is that he realized that as soon as he's done that, he also has to die.

In terms of working on that scene with Jacob, I think it's important for us to acknowledge that this is not the end. Do you know what I mean? This is not the finality of that beat. Louis doesn't forgive him at that moment, and Lestat sees that. He can't look at him that much during the trial, but there's another moment when Lestat looks at him and all he sees is pure hate in Louis' gaze. "He's never going to forgive me." But he doesn't flip back to just doing the trial — he still wants to save him, you know what I mean? He's got to just hurry the proceedings up, get through the f--king thing, and stick to his script.

That definitely is also when I feel like we get into that silhouetted, mirage version of the trial. I think that's when we're in full-blown POV bulls--t of how it actually went.

[suzannahnatters]

So as I've been re-reading LOTR, I got to the "Many Meetings" chapter where Arwen takes a good long look at Frodo; and I started thinking this character over.

I have always interpreted this as her summing him up for the task she knows lies ahead for him; if he can't save the known world then she doesn't get to marry the man she loves. But is Arwen's desire to marry Aragorn the only thing that is driving her? This is someone, after all, who was raised and taught by Galadriel herself, the wielder of Nenya, ruler of Lorien, and enemy of Sauron.

Arwen is very much wisdom-coded in this book, as opposed to, say, Eowyn, who is firmly warrior-coded. In the rabid days of my teen Tolkien era I used to have a lot of arguments about Arwen and about how little she appears in the book: and I always used to argue that it was a valid storytelling choice to give us only brief glimpses of her, because LOTR is simply not her story. In Letter 181 Tolkien himself confirms this, saying that the main reason Arwen isn't more prominent in the plot is that it's written from a hobbitish perspective. The tale of Aragorn and Arwen, he says:

"is part of the essential story, and is only placed so [in the Appendices], because it could not be worked into the main narrative without destroying its structure: which is planned to be 'hobbito-centric', that is, primarily a study of the ennoblement (or sanctification) of the humble."

I also used to argue that the fact that Arwen doesn't appear to have agency doesn't mean she wasn't actually involved. Tolkien says at one point in the book that she "watched over" Aragorn in thought, and fresh off my re-read of the Silmarillion, in which the Elves are said to have some kind of telepathic power, I think that this is what she's been doing this whole time. While I'm sorry her contributions aren't highlighted a bit more, she's not limited to embroidering banners for Aragorn; she has an agency that we simply cannot see because we are so firmly in the hobbitish perspective.

Bear in mind, too, that Arwen is supposed to be a kind of second Luthien. Unlike Luthien, she has far more family support from her father and brothers who do everything they can to help with the Quest, thus removing the motivation Luthien had to run away and have adventures. Presumably Arwen could have made a magic cloak and snuck into Mordor with the Ring, except that Frodo was chosen for that task. Plus, maybe she's just too powerful for Sauron to miss - Tolkien hints as much in that passage I quoted above, from Letter 181.

Still, the question remains, and it's a valid one: WHY does Tolkien choose not to bring Arwen more strongly into the story? WHY doesn't he give her a role closer to Luthien's? Why didn't he have her, and not Glorfindel, ride out to bring help during the Flight to the Ford?

You know me - I don't think it's because Tolkien didn't think a woman couldn't make this kind of contribution. He pretty demonstrably did. Rather, I think it's because he made the valid and indeed deeply thematic choice to code Arwen as a woman of peace rather than a woman of war.

Remember that at the end of LOTR, the entire world undergoes a process of renewal and healing. Those who have been warriors - Faramir, Eowyn, Samwise, Gandalf, and so on - put their swords away and become gardeners and healers. Even before the war ends, Aragorn confirms his claim to the kingship of Gondor, not by helping to win the battle of the Pelennor Fields, but by healing those who are lying at the brink of death in the Houses of Healing, under the Nazgul's influence. For Tolkien, who lived through not one but two world wars, peace was not something lesser to be assigned to women. War was not an end in itself ("I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness...") but a means to a just peace, the ultimate goal for men and women alike.

Just as, say, Fatty Bolger, or Galadriel, choose not to go on the Quest of the Ring and aren't shamed for it by the narrative, so too does Arwen choose not to go on the Quest. Yet, just like everyone else who chooses not to join, Arwen DOES make a pivotal contribution to the story. And it's one the fandom is not super aware of. Tolkien explained it like this in Letter 246, after mentioning that Frodo expected to die very soon after completing the Quest.

"But he did not, and one can observe the disquiet growing in him. Arwen was the first to observe the signs, and gave him her jewel for comfort, and thought of a way of healing him."

The footnote to this sentence reads:

"It is not made explicit how she could arrange this. She could not of course just transfer her ticket on the boat like that! For any except those of Elvish race 'sailing West' was not permitted, and any exception required 'authority,' and she was not in direct communication with the Valar, especially not since her choice to become 'mortal'. What is meant is that it was Arwen who first thought of sending Frodo into the West, and put in a plea for him to Gandalf (direct or through Galadriel, or both), and she used her own renunciation of the right to go West as an argument. Her renunciation and suffering were related to and enmeshed with Frodo's: both were parts of a plan for the regeneration of the state of Men. Her prayer might therefore be specially effective, and her plan have a certain equity of exchange. No doubt it was Gandalf who was the authority that accepted her plea."

All through my re-read I've been pointing out how very important it is to the story that Frodo gets a hope of healing at the end - far more important than the horrors that intervene. Arwen is the one who is able to get him that healing. Not only that, but in choosing mortality, she doesn't just marry Aragorn and start a new line of kings in Gondor - anyone could have done that. There's something special about Arwen, specifically - the pupil of Galadriel the pupil of Melian the Maia - that brings about a regeneration of the entire race of Men. Perhaps she helps to transmit to all of humanity the wisdom and lore of the Elves and the Maiar. Perhaps this includes much in the way of healing and craftsmanship.

Speculating on this, I'm also led to think about Arwen's relationship with Galadriel. In "The Council of Elrond", Elrond mentions that opinion is divided on what will happen with the Three elven Rings once the One Ring is destroyed. Some hope the Three will continue to be effective, healing Middle Earth and undoing the works of the Enemy. But when we get to Lorien, we find that Galadriel is not among them. Everything she says demonstrates that she expects the Ringbearer to destroy not only the One Ring, but also the works of the Three. So, Galadriel has always known that SHE will never be able to do the work of healing Middle Earth from Sauron's shadow. Was this a mission that she saw herself entrusting to Arwen?

Sure - as far as I'm aware, Tolkien never got around to writing this down in detail. It's a very subtle part of the story and maybe we would have preferred him to make his point more overtly...but it very much is there. Arwen didn't just give up her mortality; she also gave it away of her own free will, in order to help heal and regenerate the world from the Shadow, and not only did she do this for the man she loved, but for as many others as she could, notably Frodo.

The reason Arwen doesn't get a lot of agency in LOTR is because her hour hasn't yet come. As Tolkien writes in "Many Meetings," few mortals had YET seen her.

But they would.

[dalekofchaos]

If there were more endings than just Sacrifice Chloe or Arcadia Bay.

So I came up with 2 alternate choices of what happens when Max comes back via the Butterfly photo.

Choice 1. Sacrifice Chloe remains the same, but give more angst. Max holds onto Chloe and is there for her in Chloe's final moments.

Choice 2. Sacrifice Max. Max sacrifices herself. So I've always thought it was odd this was not a choice. LIS used the Butterfly Effect as an inspiration, so Max would write down her final journal entry declaring she is going to defy fate and save Chloe and Arcadia Bay, but even if it costs her own life.

Max jumps out telling Nathan to stop, Nathan shocked, shoots Max. Chloe rushes to Max and holds onto her. Chloe crying and screaming Max's name. Chloe crying while Max simply smiles and tells Chloe "Have a fantastic life" and passes on.

We flash forward via the photos being burned and being replaced like in the Bay ending, but from Chloe's POV. One shot shows Chloe holding Max's body, in another she's in her room full of Max's pictures in front of her, another where she and Joyce embrace and make peace with David's hand on her in support showing a hint of Chloe making peace with her mother and a hint of David and Chloe making peace and the final photo is Chloe at the lighthouse. Cut to Max's funeral. Max's parents are there and are like how Joyce was at Chloe's funeral, Warren, Kate, Dana and Victoria are there and finally a shot of Chloe breaking down at the sight of the casket being lowered.

Epilogue. After the funeral, Chloe reads Max's journal. At first she can't believe it, but so many things start to make sense. Nathan, Rachel and Jefferson. Max gave up her life so that she can live. So Chloe vows not to waste this second chance and vows to do better for Max. Time skip showing a future where she lives with a new girlfriend(a completely new character or even Steph), works at Arcadia Bay Garage while attending Bay City College, plays the guitar in a band and doesn't forget Max, like show Chloe looking at a framed picture she has of Max, a reminder of what she lost and why she chooses to live on and how forever grateful she is that Max was in her life and the week they had together in another lifetime.

Choice 3. Max talks Nathan down.

Max slowly comes out of hiding and talks to Nathan calmly. "Nathan, please. Don't do this. I know you're tired of people trying to control you. I know you never wanted to hurt Rachel or Kate and you know deep down you don't want to hurt me or Chloe." Nathan's hand with the loaded gun is shaking but he listens. "I know about the Dark Room. I know what happened to Rachel and Kate. I know that your father and Jefferson made you the way you are. But you don't have to be like this. You don't have to hurt anyone anymore. You can bring them down. Turn yourself in and you'll be as far away from your father and you can get the help you need."

Nathan struggles with his words and falls to his knees and drops the gun. "Th…thank you" Nathan leaves.

Chloe jumps and hugs Max. "Max, what the hell just happened?"

"I saved you, and I saved everyone." Max explains everything, apologizes for not keeping contact and they hug one more time.

We see flash forwards. First picture sees Nathan turning himself in. Second picture shows Jefferson being arrested in the Dark Room. Third-5th picture shows depending on your pro Chloe or Warren choices shows Max and Chloe together having a date at Two WHales with Joyce smiling with approval and kissing at the Lighthouse. If you chose more pro Warren choices, we see Max and Warren Going Ape, holding hands in the chemistry room and sharing their first kiss at the Vortex party. Final picture shows Max, Chloe, Warren, Kate and Victoria all hanging out and living life.

Final end scene is Rachel's funeral. The last scene would be Max and Chloe smiling at Rachel's Doe spirit, similar to how Max did at the Blue Butterfly.

[666writingcafe]

Sloth

Belphie

This time, no one can say that I didn't keep my mouth shut. I've minded my own business through all this foolishness. Not just about the flash flood, but everything pertaining to MC. Ever since their little confession to me a few months ago, I've been doing some research. The reason why I was so skeptical about their identity? Possession. It opens doors in the mind that never truly shut, even if the soul travels across realms. Which means that at some point in their life, I've been inside MC.

And not just spiritually, but that's a different subject all together.

More pieces fell into place when Satan dragged me into his room one afternoon and eagerly whispered to me what he overheard in the castle's library. MC must have an extraordinary amount of power to be able to survive pacts with all seven of us in their timeline, and the longer they're here, the more out of control that power has become. Something must have kept it under control back home that they no longer have access to.

So, to make a long story short, after MC found all of us hiding in the attic, they grew a tantrum so major that it drained whatever energy they had left and made them and everyone else pass out. Well, except for me, but that makes sense. If Beel and Levi experienced less of their sin, then I should, too.

Unfortunately, nothing I do seems to be waking any of them up.

Mammon, Asmo, Satan, and Beel all had to face their greatest fear as part of their transformation. Losing my sister was mine. Don't get me wrong; I love Beel and would be devastated if he were suddenly taken away from me. We have a special bond as twins, after all. But Lilith and I...

We were soulmates.

I know that normally has romantic implications, but not in this case. She was not only my sister, but my best friend. We got each other in a way no one else did. When she fell to her death, something inside of me tore away and flew down with her, never to be seen again. Not even Beel can fill the hole that was left behind.

And I've made peace with that. So what if I normally can't stay awake for long periods of time? I was already dozing off frequently in the Celestial Realm long before the War happened, so becoming the Avatar of Sloth seemed like something that was meant to happen anyway.

But MC's clearly fighting something in that brain of theirs, and the only way to wake everyone up is to figure out what that thing is and defeat it, at least temporarily.

Interestingly enough, right when I leave the attic and head downstairs to get reinforcements, I nearly trip over a little demon. By its purple coloring, my guess is that it's Little D. No. 7. For whatever reason, we were all assigned colors, and purple happens to be mine.

"The others are outside," No. 7 mumbles.

"What others?" I ask, causing it to glare at me like I'm the stupidest being alive.

"The prince and his friends. They've come to help us, but there's a problem. Everything on this side of the gate is asleep, and anything that crosses it immediately falls prey to our magic."

"So they're waiting for us, then?" No. 7 sighs.

"Unfortunately. I tried telling them that it's too risky, but they seem determined to save the day or whatever." It pauses as it glances up the stairs. "It's coming from up there. I can feel its pulse beating against my own. We can only bring one of them inside with us. Any more, and we won't be strong enough to fight against it."

"I thought you'd be enjoying this right now." Another sigh, more annoyed this time.

"Listen, if you want to experience a world where you never sleep a single wink ever again, then be my guest. But that is not on my agenda, so the sooner we can get this over with, the sooner I can return to my nice, comfy bed and rest." With that, it turns around and stomps down the rest of the stairs, forcing me to follow it all the way outside. Sure enough, there are five people standing on the other side of the gate, looking nervously at the House.

"This is ridiculous!" Of course the eggplant would complain. "First I get caught in a sudden storm without an umbrella, then I got dragged into a dinky little boat--"

"An ark," Simeon quietly corrects.

"--and forced to sit in there for days--"

"It was only two days at most," Barbatos calmly interrupts.

"How was I supposed to know that?! My normal time-keeping devices were at home! I can't even report any of this, since I had no way of writing any of it down!"

"You really are a drama queen, aren't you?" Kind of surprised to see the reaper here, but maybe Diavolo took pity on her. He's weird like that.

"I beg your pardon?! I'll have you know that I hold an important seat on the House of Lords! I refuse to be subject to such slander!"

"And this is why most of us don't like you." No. 7 hops on a gate post and looks directly at Mephistopheles. "The stick up your ass is so deep and long that I'm surprised it hasn't poked out of your mouth yet. You should be grateful that Diavolo seems to be the one person that tolerates your ass enough to let you on the ark in the first place. I for one would have been perfectly content with watching you drown."

"Seven, enough." The first thing I notice about Diavolo is how weary he looks. Something tells me sleep has eluded him before the first signs of rain even occurred.

Then our eyes meet, and suddenly I'm sucked into a vision. We're in an orate courtroom, watching MC as a boogeyman flies out of a dark red chest and transform into a form eerily similar to the one they've taken as Zephyr.

The vision only lasts a moment, but it tells me everything I need to know.

"Him." I gesture towards Diavolo so that No. 7 can see who I'm referring to. The little demon glances between the two of us before shrugging nonchalantly.

"Fair enough." It hops from the post directly into Diavolo's arms. "Lead the way, Belphegor."

Taglist: @lost-in-time-wanderer, @fuzztacular, @dianedancer18, @sweetbrier2908, @flare-love, @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf, @thunderlightning351, @l3v1chan, @anxious-chick, @5mary5, @expressionless-fr, @tenkobitch, @budbuddnbuddy

[amber-laughs]

Hii!

I was thinking here and had nobody to share, so what do you think Jon's relationship with his siblings, or rather, cousins ahaha, will be like after they reunite? Do you have any headcanons? Arya and Jon? Click right away as before or nah? Bran and Jon? Jon and Sansa? Jon and Rickon (at some point)?

Sorry for the ask, I'm just like bored :)

Please come to me with all your bored questions I love answering them! I wanna start off by saying I don't think Jon will be as devoid of emotion as some people theorize he will be. We have two cases of resurrection but they are very different scenarios than Jon's. First Catelyn to Lady Stoneheart: Cat went mad before she was killed, her mind was already heavily altered in her final moments then her spirit was seemingly sifting about aimlessly until Beric brought her back. Beric has been resurrected six times and he says it take a toll on him every time and theres less of himself each time, meaning his memory was nowhere near as bad the first time it happened. But most importantly neither of these characters are wargs like Jon is. Jon's spirit will be in Ghost who is spiritually and mentally linked to him which I think will be a saving grace. I don't mean to say Jon will have no change but he most certainly will not be a walking zombie, he will still be able to have heartfelt connections with the people around him in my opinion. So:

Arya and Jon: I think that Arya will hear about Jon's death before she gets back to Westeros and it will absolutely devastate her which will make their reunion all the more touching. Jon thought she was dead until ADWD and I assume will think she's dead again if he learns about the Jeyne Pool switch so I think their reunion will be one of relief. I've made a post about this before but Arya thinks she knows who Jon's mother is right now, Edric Dayne told her it was Wylla the Wetnurse and she explicitly says she can't wait to tell Jon. I think this will go one of two ways: Jon will finally be at peace to know the truth and then BOOM! he finds out the The Truth or he'll know about Rhaegar and Lyanna before hand and have to decide if he's going to lie to Arya and the rest of his siblings. I think the R+L=J situation will create a bit of a rift between them because it will feel like a severed bond but I imagine they'll heal that by the end.

Sansa and Jon: I think Littlefinger is going to massively get in the way of this dynamic. Littlefinger wants Sansa to have the North. Jon is Robb's named heir which throws a wrench in those plans. Not only that but George has said Littlefinger gets confused when it comes to Sansa, sometimes she's his daughter with Cat he never had and sometimes she is Catelyn. Grrm called Sansa Petyr's teenage fantasy that's come back and when you have mini Ned Stark walking around the halls that will cause problems on top of the fact that LF will definitely be sniffing around trying to find out who Jon's mother is. He'll try to cause as many problems as possible for them I think. That being said I think Jon and Sansa are a now more alike than ever not only has Sansa experienced being a bastard but Jon has experienced his first love and having that torn away from him. Jon went North essentially wanting to be a great knight and finding out Castle Black is not what he heard in the songs and stories just like Sansa when she went South. I think LF will be their main issue along with some tension over Sansa feeling like Robb sidelined her for Jon and I'm not exactly sure how or where it'll end up but I'm excited (I do not under any circumstances believe that they'll be romantically involved)

Jon and Bran: I know this is gonna sound weird because Bran is only 9 but I see their relationship becoming a little co-worker like. Bran will know all about the Others by the time they meet up and Jon and him will spend a good chunk of time trading information I think. On top of that I think Bran will end up becoming something of a warging teacher to Jon the way Jojen was to him. I don't think I believe that Bran will be the one to reveal R+L=J to him, I think that'll be left to Howland.

Jon and Rickon: Personally I see Rickon dying before he reunites with Jon. If that doesn't happen I'll be curious to know if Rickon remembers him. There's a section in the Cushings Draft of Feast for Crows where Ghost can sense Rickon and Shaggydog in Skagos I know it was deleted so that sort of nullifies it but we know Summer senses the other wolves and like I said with Jon's memories staying safe in Ghost I wonder if the direwolves' connections will have an effect on Rickon being able to remember his siblings despite his age. I personally think that he will remember them if he lives because narratively I don't really see a reason for him to not, I mean I know logically he was 3 when Jon left but he's only 5 now its not much of a stretch.

But to give an overall base answer yes, I think all of them will click right away with love, relief and familiarity but that the problems above will come down the line and can't be swept under the rug

[beautifulterriblequeen]

You have subscribed to TDP angst

When Viren was ready to die properly, he went out wearing the clothing of a Sunfire prisoner, defending his home against a maddened archdragon. His death was dramatic, but it's still a death within the cycle. He died in Xadian penal clothing, actively defending against one of its strongest figures.

He couldn't escape that cycle, in the end. He spent too much time fueling its great engine.

Thanks to all the parallels between him and Runaan, I've already been worrying for my favorite assassin following a similar route in S7. (and celebrating his return, I can multitask) Specifically, Runaan achieving another death, one of his own choosing, but also one where he remains trapped in the cycle he kept contributing to.

We know someone is going to die. Runaan is very much a sacrificial character. He owes a debt to humanity that is so great he can never truly repay it, just like Viren.

And now he's out of uniform, too. Wearing the shirt of a softer, more penitent person.

If Runaan dies saving someone else, it will probably be Ezran. He owes Katolis that debt specifically. But he could also save Callum, for Rayla. He could save Aanya, other royals, or somehow all of the humans at once. If Viren's call to action and his final foe were both "Dragons!" then Runaan's should be a human threat. Probably dark magic.

Probably Claudia.

One human - Viren - and one elf - Runaan - dying to stop the two halves of the cycle might be enough to finally do it.

The part that makes me saddest about this speculation is Runaan leaving Ethari twice. I don't think Ethari would let him go alone a second time. And with the way we've seen Lain and Tiadrin dance off into their forever-after, happy and together, well...

Ethari wouldn't let Runaan go alone. Xadia could lose its best craftsman as part of the price to pay to stop the cycle. Rayla could lose her last parents.

It's a kids show. You don't generally get to keep living parents on a kids show. No one else has any, at this point. The kids have to grow up and take over. They can't do that in the shadow of their parents, and those parents' sins.

Rayla has made up for her mistake in getting Runaan coined, as far as the Silvergrove is concerned. She can be unghosted now. Any further deaths on Runaan's part won't be her fault. She's free to move forward with Callum.

There is balance here. I could see this playing out somehow. A fitting end.

But, of course, this isn't a perfect show with perfect characters and perfect outcomes. Can I make it a little angstier?

Ahaha. Of course.

Maybe Runaan does try to sacrifice himself, seeing no other purpose for his life anymore, but Ethari takes his place alone, knowing that he will do anything to spare Runaan's suffering a second time, and Runaan is left once again to live, and live, and live, past the point when he expected to perish.

A peaceful long life with Rayla and Callum and no cycle of violence, everything he could want, but no precious husband to share it with. What if living in the best timeline without Ethari is Runaan's true punishment for his choices?

That Green Mile is so long.

[scatteredlight1]

Am I the villain...?

Instead of 'Am I the asshole' it's just silm characters except they're going 'Am I the villain...'.

Sons of Feanor version:

Maedhros: I might have stolen a couple of jewels from my uncle. For context, these jewels were made by my father and then stolen by others. However, when I picked up the jewels they burned me and I jumped into a chasm. I am now stuck in the halls of the dead, thinking about my past actions, and the leader around here, Mandos, is accusing me of being a villain. I have committed many crimes while I was getting these jewels back, including mass murder, theft, kidnapping, arson, starting a war against the bad guy who killed my father, and perhaps a few more. But I also saved a few people. This place keeps making me think: am I the real villain here? Am I the cause of all the problems? Am I at fault for allowing my brothers to roam unchecked?

Maglor: Am I the villain? Yes. I am the villain. I kidnapped innocent children after killing their parents brutally, burned down ships when my father asked, didn't protect my lands when my brother asked, and then I abandoned those kids I stole to wallow in self-pity. I'm contemplating whether or not I deserve to be called anything right now.

Celegorm: I just got killed by the son of this girl that I liked. My dog abandoned me for her, and she stole my family's jewel and refused to return it. And now this stupid god guy is accusing me of being a villain for not respecting a person's wishes? Am I the villain when I was abandoned by everyone and accused of crimes I did not commit?

Caranthir: I was just minding my own business, scamming people and getting in the money needed to fund a whole ass war and then my brothers decided we had to kill a bunch of people and I had to participate. So I did. Now I'm dead and this guy tells me I can't get money because I was basically a horror story told to children. Would I be the villain if I killed him? (He's already dead btw.)

Curufin: Whatever anyone else is saying, I am not the villain. But apparently, it's cool to post 'Am I the villain stuff' or so my brother said. So. I might've killed a bunch of people and I might've made weapons that harmed way more people. Does that make me the villain? I think not. Those people were keeping me and my brothers from our birthright. We asked them politely multiple times, but it didn't work. Sadly, we had to resort to violence, although we were set on achieving it through peace. Additionally, those people tried to ban our language, eradicate our culture, and refused to allow our refugees to settle under their protection because they were sanctimonious, prejudiced, and stuck-up.

Amrod: Can I be the villain when I've been dead since the beginning?

Amras: My twin was killed by my father, and then my father died. I proceeded to do unspeakable things to get revenge on the guy that firstly made my father insane enough to kill my twin and then my father. Anyone else who was injured was just collateral and completely accidental. Besides, I spent most of my time listening to my older brothers and following their orders, but this random guy I bumped into called me a villain. Am I really the villain?

[iztarshi]

I've been trying to put my thoughts into better order on this before writing meta about it, but you're getting stream of consciousness.

Silco's speech about drowning - while almost certainly wholly inaccurate to the experience of drowning - is important foreshadowing for a lot of season 2 and Jinx and Viktor's role as people caught uneasily between life and death. Between desiring life and death.

Ever wondered what it’s like to drown? Story of opposites. There’s peace in water. Like it’s holding you, whispering in low tones to let it in. And every problem in the world will fade away. But then, there’s this thing… in your head, and it’s raging. Lighting every nerve with madness. To fight. To survive. And all the while this question lingers before you: `Have you had enough?` It’s funny. You could pass a lifetime without ever facing a choice like that. But it changes you forever. For that, I thank you...Old friend.

For Silco it's mostly a single event, although it's also a formative trauma that haunts him. But we don't see him suicidal. He wasn't suicidal to begin with, he was being murdered, and the temptation was to let that happen when the person he loved wanted him dead and life seemed to be nothing but struggle.

Jinx inherits that trauma partly from Silco, who sees it as a form of strength as much as damage, and deliberately tries to impart it to her. His own vicious determination to live is what came out of it, and he thinks it will be the same for her.

But for Jinx, tormented by mental illness and the fact that her own trauma left her with the guilty belief everyone would be better off if she was dead, the choice remains much closer to the surface. We see it on the bridge when she nearly kills herself to kill Ekko - and is revived by Silco's inability to let her go and Singed's willingness to use anyone as an experiment in surpassing death. After Isha's death it takes hold of her completely. She can't imagine life as anything but suffering, death is peace, but some part of her still doesn't want to die. It's... uh. Okay. I think Jinx's survival was deliberately hinted at. I also think if that's what the writers were going for they should have made it a lot more obvious? Because as things stand, the most straightforward reading comes down on the side of suicide. Which is weird! And Viktor's section is going to make it weirder! But if you do take Jinx as surviving then ultimately she makes a choice that is not quite Silco's. To leave behind the things that are causing her pain - as much as she can - without dying. Her mental illness and guilt will always be with her, but Zaun and Piltover and all that their divide has done to her is something she can walk away from.

For Viktor it's a different kind of trauma. He's less. Hmm. Scrappy? Than our other Zaunites, not someone who seems like he's had to fight to survive so much. But he's in very literal pain for his entire life and on top of that he's very, very lonely, caught between Zaun and Piltover and unable to belong in either. Also, he has his own guilt, which the saviour era makes a lot clearer, that he hates himself for leaving people like him behind when he left the undercity. The dream the hexcore is using to control him is one of being able to go back and fix everything, prove he didn't just leave to save himself.

(And the tragedy of the Mage, of the older Viktor, is that ultimately his struggle with guilt and isolation has doomed him to an eternity of both.)

But a lot of what gets fucked up about Viktor's intentions seems to be that inability to imagine life without pain. He doesn't want to die, but neither can he find anything about living that he wants. (Except Jayce, who was the only person he ever belonged with, the only place he wasn't lonely.) His final transformation is heralded with a song that seems to be about someone on their deathbed, about giving in more than a struggle for life. But at the same time he is struggling to live, destroying others in the process.

It's a negation, a constant negation.

Bodies hurt. The Herald seems less like Viktor's perfect body in the end and more like a mask, like Viktor can be confident in it because it isn't him, because he doesn't have a body. I mean, it's thematically treated like a mask for sure.

Emotions hurt. All the philosophy is just a cover for heartbreak.

Divisions hurt. Of course someone who got caught between the undercity and Piltover would want to destroy distinctions between people. Of course someone who was othered for his disability would want everyone to be the same. Doesn't that fix the problem?

But negating everything about life is just death by another name.

But then what does it mean that this increasing self-destruction (spilling out onto everyone around him through a compassionate desire for them not to have to suffer either) has to end in a literal death? And what does it mean that Jayce dies too?

By that point it actually does feel like the only kindness left for Viktor is to not be forced to die alone. He could barely handle Sky's death, there's not really any hope that he could live with what he's done without it being torture for him.

But thematically what does it mean?

[spqcebunsforever]

My “Prince” Charming

Pairing: Billy loomis x reader

Summary: Y/n knows of Billy Loomis always seeing him in the halls or seeing him sit with his friends at lunch but she has never spoken to him. That is until she is walking home at night by herself and bumps into Prince charming himself.

Y/n’s pov

Of course, it's just my luck that I have to walk home in the dark by myself. I had been at my friend's house and we both had completely forgotten about the time and again just my luck my friend's parents hadn't been in so they couldn’t even give me a lift. So here I was scared out of my mind practically jumping at any noise that I heard. But I just kept telling myself that I was being paranoid and that everything would be fine but I still knew how long a walk I had to my house and this new killer on the loose didn't settle my nerves at all.

So I just kept my head up and tried to walk as fast as I could but suddenly I heard a twig snap behind me making my head immediately turn but there was nothing there no little small animal or just a person so I took a breath in and just told myself that I was imagining things. But when I turned around to again start walking I was now face-to-face with someone and I let out a little scream which made the boy jump a little problem not expecting it. The more I looked at the boy I realised just who it was.

Billy Loomis, I had never spoken to the boy but I had seen him in the halls or sitting with his friends at the water fountain but I had never actually spoken to him. “Oh my god I'm sorry for screaming but that's kind of what you get for sneaking up on someone” Billy chucked himself slightly and rubbed the back of his neck “Sorry didn't mean to scare you that bad but I just thought I'd come up to you, you know it is dangerous walking by yourself at night”. I gave him a quick smile “Yes well sadly I have no choice I was with my friends and her parents weren't home to give me a lift”. Billy just nodded and we stood for a second in silence just looking at each other until he started speaking again.

“Well if you want I could always walk you back home you know make sure you are safe” I couldn't tell if he was serious or not but I did like the idea of walking with someone rather than walking by myself so I nodded “well if you don't mind I would like that I've never been a fan of the dark I always feel like someone is getting ready to attack you”. I started walking and Billy started walking beside me “So why were you walking by yourself at this time if you know it's dangerous”. He just shrugged “I kinda like the dark I think it's peaceful and relaxing with everyone away and the silence except for the odd animal or something like that but you don't need to worry about me if anyone did try to attack me or something I am very capable of fighting back”. I just giggled “Well thank you so much for giving up on your peaceful and relaxing walk to make sure I get home okay your like my very own Prince Charming”.

Now that made him laugh and I don’t think I had ever heard Billy laugh until now “Prince charming that's a first do you treat every guy that saves you from walking home at night or does he have to be as charming as me to get a label like that” that in return made me laugh “Oh yes because it's just a normal thing for me to have guys sneak up on me at night and then offer to walk me home because I guess I'm just that popular” I playfully roll my eyes and I see Billy make a fake shocked face “Wow I didn't realise I was walking with such a big time celebrity we better be careful in case your fans get too possessive” he gives me a wry smile and I can't help the stupid big smile that's appeared on my face while talking to him “oh well then you better watch out my fans might not like that you were the lucky one to walk me home tonight they might get jealous”

“Jealous of me come on y/n don't make me laugh” he chuckled softly but then turned his attention back on me “But don't you worry if a jealous boy were to show up I would handle him easily quick and simple” I just playfully rolled my eyes again “ I would love to see that, that would make this night even better” Billy then let out a little laugh “well who knows maybe one day and I'll be fighting in your honour because of how much of a gentleman I am”. I again laugh “ I would love to see that just call me up and I'll be running” Billy then looked at me with a smirk on his face “And what makes you think that I would actually call?” he raised an eyebrow and waited for me to answer.

“Well, I would like to think you would call after all you are my prince charming”. His smile got even wider and he got a little bit closer to me as we continued to walk “Well if I did become your Prince charming I suppose you would have to give me a kiss goodnight, right?” I felt a small blush come on my face I thought “I guess it would” I noticed that we were not at my house and we both stopped “So, y/n we are at your house, aren't we, I don't suppose you could spare me a little goodnight kiss, could you”. I could still feel the blush on my face and I knew that I probably looked like an idiot but I tried my best to play it cool “Well I can't say no to my prince charming now can I” I kissed him on the cheek “thank you so much for walking me home you are such a gentleman Billy Loomis”.

Billy had a soft smile on his face as my lips touched his cheek and he winked before he responded “I'm just doing my job y/n but I suppose I should take my leave now…the Princess must rest after such a hard night out”. I walked to my door and Billy followed me “Of course, I am so tired from the long walk and you know how princesses are we are all very weak and fragile” I smirked at him and he returned it “How could I forget I suppose I'll take my leave now… unless you wanted to invite me in because you are so fragile and weak and you need some help from your Prince charming”. I knew exactly what he was trying to do and I wasn't going to stop him and even better my parents were out so we wouldn't be interrupted it was like this was just meant to happen.

“Well if Prince Charming would like to come in I am just too weak and fragile and tired to fight him on it” I opened my door and me and Billy walked in “Well if you're offering I guess I could come inside” his tone then turned into a teasing one “It might be dangerous for me to walk home by myself now you know since there are just so many monsters in the shadows” I led him to the living room and he started making himself comfortable on the couch “ see now you have to stay I wouldn't want my protector to get hurt now would I and anyway it is the least I could do”. I sat down next to him on the couch turning the TV on so we could watch something. “I hope I'm not disturbing you y/n I don't want to be intruding you know” I just shook my head “Now how could you be disturbing me if anything you've made my night so much better”.

While I was looking at the stuff to watch on the TV I felt Billy’s fingers on my face and he turned my face so that I was looking right at him. “I'm glad you feel that way because I can think of something that can make this night way more enjoyable” Again I felt my face flush and Billy started leaning closer to me and before I knew it he started kissing me and of course, I kissed him back my hands making there way up to his hair but before anything else could happen Billy stopped kissing me and I felt a sharp pain in my back. I turned around and saw the Ghost face killer I tried to scream or run but before I could do any of that the masked killer plunged their knife into my chest so fast I couldn't even count how many times they had done it. I felt myself fall off the couch and I saw Billy still just sitting there his face blank of expression I wanted to tell him to run or fight or do something but he smiled at the masked killer and then got off the couch and kneeled next to me and I saw the horrible and evil smirk he had on his face and I put two and two together and realised he was with the killer “Ya know y/n you shouldn't let strangers in your house they might just want to kill you no matter how nice they act but thanks for the kiss appreciate it”.

I wanted to say something anything but I couldn't I was in too much pain and I felt so cold and I couldn't move I felt paralysed. All I could think about was how stupid I was that I had actually let the killer into my house and how my parents would be so disappointed in me and how I would never see them or my friends again. I felt my eyes close and the pain that I felt was slowly going away the last thing I heard before everything went to black was Billy saying “Right come on let's move this stupid bitch so we can fuck off…guess I was a pretty shitty Prince charming huh”

[cosmicanemoia]

Things and Doubts

Amelia Shepherd x Reader (broken up)

Amelia Shepherd x Kai Bartley (back together)

Love Me Till You Leave Me part 14

You have been mustering some courage to get some of the things that you've left in Amelia's place. After some time, you finally have enough courage to get your some of your things from Amelia's place.

As you walk over to her place, you feel yourself lacking the courage 'you haven't saved up enough' you thought to yourself, but you're already there and if you back out now, you won't be able to anymore.

You still had your key and you still know the pass code, atleast that's what you think, you hoped she hasn't change the locks or the pass code, and to your luck, it wasn't.

There's one major detail you have forgotten. Someone else might be there. Someone else named Kai. "You're y/n, right?" You turn around in shock hearing that question, and you see Kai standing with her arms crossed in their chest, "Uh-- yes. I texted Amelia to let her know I'm getting my things. I didn't know someone would be here, I can come back later if I'm intruding."

K:No, it's okay. Please continue.

Y/N: Thanks. I'll be quick.

K: Take your time.

A few silently awkward moments later. Kai cleared their throat, which made you look at them. "That's pretty cool. Not making her feel guilty for not choosing you." They said, which made you confused, you scoff, "where did that come from? We don't need to make small talks if you don't want to." You chuckled. "I'm just saying. Not everyone would do that." They said, which made you stop what you're doing and look them straight in the face, "she have nothing to be guilty of. And, it is not cool. It's just the mature and right thing to do. You know, basic human decency 101. I can't remember where I've read it." You chuckled at your own joke. You can tell that they tried to hold back a chuckle but failed anyway. "Damn! I can't hate you even if I wanted to." You raised your eyebrows at them, "uh-- thanks?" Then you narrowed your eyes, they try to defend their last sentence by saying, " I didn't mean anything by it. It was just-- you, uh---" ending the unfinished thoughts that can't be formed by words in a scoff, they scoff and just smiles, "Sure. Whatever." You replied, letting them know you get what they mean.

There is this awkward silence again. The only sound is when one of you cleared their throats. When you move things, it is so silent you can hear yourself breath. And it went on until you finished packing and getting your things.

************Later that night************

Amelia and Kai are now cuddled up in bed. There is silence still, but for them, it wasn't awkward. It was just soothing. "Y/N took the last of her things earlier." Kai said, and Amelia just hummed as a response.

Kai wandered in their own mind. They would remember insignificant little moments like how they thought they caught Amelia stealing glances, looking at y/n. How would Amelia smile every time she saw y/n smiling around the hospital. How Amelia quickly turns around to avoid y/n's gaze.

Without Kai's knowledge that Amelia is already sleeping, they blurted out, "Are you still in love with Y/N?". When they got no response, they checked and looked at Amelia, 'she was sleeping,' they thought as they let out a sigh.

They tried to go to sleep, but they just couldn't. Something is bothering them, and they can't get it out of their mind. As Kai is about to fall asleep, Amelia unconciously shuffled on the bed that makes them look at her.

Since Kai couldn't sleep, they sat up on the bed to watch Amelia sleep. How beautiful and peaceful Amelia looked while she slept. While Kai watches Amelia, a smile forms on her girlfriend's lips, and then she mumbles something. Kai moved their ear closer to Amelia's mouth so they could hear what she was saying in her sleep. Their curiosity only broke their heart as they heard her say "y/n" in her sleep while she smiled and slept soundly.

Kai finally fell asleep but not as peaceful as Amelia. They fell asleep wondering what her girlfriend was dreaming about, why she said that name, and why was she smiling as she dreamed of y/n. Wondering if Amelia is still in love with Y/N.

In the morning, Kai woke up first even if they slept last and late. They caress Amelia's face as she sleeps, but it only wakes Amelia up. "You were dreaming last night." Kai whispered. "I am?" Amelia asked, confused. "Yes," Kai responded

"How would you know?" The blue-eyed girl asked. "You were smiling and humming and saying something last night. You said y/n's name in your sleep. " Kai vocalise, Amelia, who's shocked and confused, "I did? Really?" She then chuckled nervously, having an idea where this conversation might be going. "Yes," the brown eyed person replies monotonously. "I don't know. I don't remember." She depended herself. "Was it a sex dream?" Kai asks, Amelia quickly said, "What!? I told you, I don't know and I don't remember. Now let's get some coffee. " She stood up from the bed and tried to go to the bathroom to wash her face, but Kai suddenly grabbed Amelia's hand, making her fall right back into bed. They were both shocked at how their conversation quickly escalated to this. Whatever this is. Kai tried to apologize and explain themselves, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to---" but Amelia quickly cut them off and frustratedly utter "what is it?" They both let out a sigh, and there was silence for a minute.

Amelia is now standing beside the bed while Kai is still in bed, half lying, half sitting. "Are you still in love with y/n?" They finally asked the question they've been dying to know the answer to.

Both of their hearts are beating loudly on their chest. Amelia is silent for a moment, thinking how could they ask her such questions. Before she could think of a rational answer, she just blurted out, " Stop with these nonsense. Let's go get coffee... Don't ruin such a beautiful day. "

Before Kai could bother her some more, she is already out of sight, and she slammed the bathroom door, both of them shocked at the sound it made. Amelia didn't even mean to slam the door, but there's no turning back time. Kai could understand why she did what she did, but they're still waiting for and wanting an answer.

Nobody said a word on their way to the hospital. Not even a small glance in another's direction. Everyone in the hospital could feel the tension emitting from the said power couple, but they knew better than to pry. Their colleagues get out of their way as well.

They only speak with each other if they really need to, but other than that, they will avoid each other to avoid such uncomfortable conversation. Even if they both know they're still gonna have that much needed discussion and conversation, they just didn't want to right now.

There are only two possible outcome when they have the conversation. Either they stay together, or they don't.