#I'm still working out a lot of world building things
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Hiii! Could you please write some hurt comfort hero and villain? Where it has a “who did this to you” vibes! Thanks! No pressure if you don’t want to!
"You look..." The villain's gaze travelled slowly up the hero, taking in the hard lines of them, the uncanny iciness that had replaced a once warm, familiar face. "Different."
"And you look like hell. Let's get you out of here."
Despite the fact that the hero had just blown the villain's chains to smithereens, the villain didn't move. They leaned heavily against the cold concrete wall of their cell, still staring.
The hero's fingers flexed agitated at their sides.
"I can - if you're hurt, I can help you stand. I don't - you're safe now."
It was like an act they didn't know how to play any more. The script was the same, but the tongue behind the words was a sharper thing. A whittled thing. Made hard and venomous with desperation. Like the world had taken an axe to everything that made the hero them and started hacking.
"Who did this to you?" the villain demanded.
"What?"
"You're all..." Their head lolled, as they tried to tilt it customarily to one side. Their broken fingers hurt too much to wiggle them effectively in the hero's direction, but they did their best. "Not you. All..."
"They hurt you," the hero said. Flat. Deadly.
The villain wet their cracked, swollen lips. Their voice came out raspy. "I heard screaming."
"Yeah." Something dark and protective simmered in the hero's eyes. It looked awfully a lot like 'they deserved it'. Like how the villain's eyes used to look, through a mirror darkly, until the pain scorched through everything cold and steely inside them.
"You killed people. You killed...you came for me."
"We need to go," the hero said, through gritted teeth. "We need to get you out of here. Come on." The hero ducked down, only to falter when their gruff tug immediately made the villain's whole world go fuzzy with hurting. The touch turned gentle as the villain flinched. The hero's hands floundered, like they no longer knew the language of caring, but still remembered that they wanted to try.
A stupid prickle of tears stung the villain's eyes.
"Who did this to you? Who-"
"-Please," the hero said. "Put your arms around me. You need to work with me here. Please."
The villain wrapped their aching arms around the hero's shoulders. The hero lifted them up, holding them oh so carefully. Being upright was still enough to make the villain's vision pop and then blacken.
When they regained consciousness, they were walking through a slaughter house. Blood everywhere. As if a hurricane given teeth and claws had ripped through the building.
"Did I do this?" the villain asked.
"No, love."
But that wasn't quite right.
"No, I mean - I was gone," the villain said. Their head felt so fuzzy with everything they had been given, but the sharp edges of the hero were so clear, if only they could find the words to paint the picture half as well, let the knowledge swirling inside them settle. "You were on your own. How long have you been trying to rescue me?"
"It's going to be alright, okay? I've got you. You're alright."
"Are you?"
"I'm not the one who's been tortured!" It came out a snap, and maybe the villain should have flinched after an eternity of raised voices and raised weapons, but they didn't.
"You don't do so well on your own," the villain said instead, softly. "You never have."
The hero's throat bobbed as they swallowed, convulsive, choking something down. "Don't."
The villain raised a hand, rubbing their thumb over the gaunt line of the hero's face.
The hero flinched back.
"It's going to be alright," the villain said. "You're going to be alright. I've got you."
"You -" The hero laughed then, a broken thing. They jerked their head to the side but it didn't hide the tears glinting in their eyes. "Maybe let's not focus on me right now. You were - what they did to you - they told that they - I should have got here faster."
"I'm sorry they used me against you."
"Don't."
"Tell me their names?"
"They're all dead."
"Tell me anyway."
"I killed them."
"I know, love. Tell me anyway."
The hero swore, but the villain could practically watch some life creep back into those icy eyes. Some horror. Some thing that wasn't a stranger. Their hero. The hero held them a little tighter, cradling them a little closer against their chest.
"Just - later. Let me get you help. You need help."
Well, the villain couldn't argue with that. Still. Their own body didn't feel half as perturbing as the way the hero's eyes iced over again, determined to see through the job, to not shatter no matter what they'd done to get to where they were. To get the villain back. To save them.
They tucked themselves closer to the hero's chest, to their heart - thumping proof of life, proof of hope, proof that maybe they hadn't entirely lost the thing they cared about most of all.
Who did this to you?
But the villain didn't really need to ask.
The answer was always their own name.
#not quite hurt/comfort#but it's something#comfort was attempted by both parties#hero x villain#villain x hero#heroes and villains#villains and heroes#hero and villain#villain and hero#writing snippet#my writing#story snippet
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— Everything around is somehow distant and… unreal. Like an illusion. And I am just a doll, led by emotions. A doll in a green kimono, which was once worn by a person better than me… — But… you are that person.
9 years — Little Lloyd will appear in several flashbacks, some of the moments we have already seen in the original series and some will be added not to the detriment of the canon of course. A younger Lloyd will also appear in flashbacks, namely at age 4, when the conversation turns to how he was sent to Darkley's Boarding School for Bad Boys and why.
17 years — After Crystalized, the next four years passed quietly. Lloyd tried to build a relationship with Harumi and spent most of his time with her, but it ended miserably for him after only a year of dating, as she was uncomfortable being with him after everything and decided to let go of the past and start life anew. After that, Lloyd started to have a difficult streak in his life, depressions and stresses, and every new loss and emotion only provoked Oni side. Harumi used to help him distract himself from bad emotions, they went on dates, gave gifts and just supported each other, but now she wasn't around. Misako, Wu, the ninja and especially his father helped him to keep his head up, and he did feel better until Master Wu died a year later. Garmadon returned to his lonely life, Misako immersed herself in research, Pixal returned to Cyrus Borg, and the Ninja were about to split up due to evil simply disappearing from the world. But it all ended with Lloyd forbidding the Ninja from splitting up, and due to his fear of becoming evil, he trained the Ninja every day so that they could confront Lloyd's Oni in the future. This split was the last straw for him, causing Lloyd to degenerate and withdraw into himself.
21 years — Although Lloyd trained the ninja, he himself only gave instructions and did not perform any tricks, which he did not even have the strength for over time. Candy and other treats always cheered him up, so Lloyd found solace in eating and watching TV all day, leaving the room only to rudely command the ninja what to do, and then returning to his comfort zone. All this changed Lloyd not only in appearance, but also in moral and combat terms. After two years of such a life, he noticeably gained weight, became very rude, lost his temper at every little thing, and even began to show indifference to friends and the outside world, although he understood that the situation was getting out of control. The ninja tried in every way to captivate him, offered to play outdoors or just chat, but Lloyd felt more vulnerable than ever and perceived this as a threat.
In one moment Agatha and Leo find the Monastery of Spinjitzu in the hopes that the ninja from the book of legends will help save her home from occupation. The ninja decide to do this and convince Lloyd to lead the mission, who treats Agatha with maximum contempt and mistrust, because she reminded him very much of Harumi. When the ninja were traveling on the Bounty at night through the Valley of Mountain Fires in search of Agatha's village, the ship was attacked and eventually the team crashed. This led to Jay and Cole getting lost, Kai, Zane and Nya being captured by bandits, and Lloyd, Agatha and Leo remaining unnoticed near the ship. Lloyd was the only ninja left on this journey, but this time he was absolutely not prepared to fight both physically and mentally. He simply could not imagine that he would ever pick up a weapon again, while the trained ninja were tied in shackles.
Soooo… these are just images for the Wiki infobox, but I thought it would be cool if I showed not only the characters (who I'm currently adapting for the final style of FotP), and also talked a little about the events. I'll do this for each one, since I need to get a lot of images for the pages so that people have a general introduction to the picture, despite the fact that it's still a work in progress. I don't talk about the Wiki now, but want to attract people there when I rewrite the information and put it in order (it's written based on old information, and haven't written about many things yet).
And yes, Future of the Past introduces a timeline of events, and considering that I'm trying to create a kind of fan sequel to the original Ninjago, trying to do it as well as possible, interestingly, and so that it simply evokes nostalgia and warms the soul! Even between the pilot and plot my au there are 12 years, purely symbolically, because the original series itself is that old :) Previously, I even tried to parody the WildBrain style for this, but it turned out to be unrealistic for a comic, so I chose this one. Of course, it doesn't look like what we've seen before, but… why not? “Future of the Past“, because it tells about the future of past. And just… there are many life lessons that I want to bring here, so that this story is not only interesting, but also teaches something.
I'm want to introduce new elements carefully, so that everything harmonizes with each other. In the end, even though Lloyd has changed in appearance, I'll make sure that it's unnoticeable and, on the contrary, dilutes his character. Wu died, but he will appear as a ghost and will help Lloyd (which will only make Lloyd think that he is going crazy (Agatha will not let him do this xD)). The storyline of Nya and Jay will develop brightly, considering that Nya will be in captivity and Jay will be free, which will make them remember how dear they are to each other. Old characters will appear (like Zane's falcon), some designs will reference old ones (like the Bounty), there will be a lot of flashbacks, and most of the new characters' stories will intersect with the events of the pilot season. The events of the Dragons Rising are also taken into account, I just made it so that after the Merger of worlds was created parallel universe, and each of them has a different history (same beginning - different continuation). Damn, I just wanted to create a small text book and abandon it right away, but… love blinded 😂😭
In the future I will create such posts for others, and at the same time will tell their story ^^ Of course, Agatha will be next, considering that she is a new character, I would like to cover her too (well, just take wiki-page one by one and start with my favorites lol)
#ninjagood4#ninjago future of the past#lloyd montgomery garmadon#ninjago lloyd#ninjago au#fanart#ninjago fanart#lloyd garmadon#green ninja#long post#history#ninjago future of the past designs#graphic design#dragons rising#ninjago headcanons#ninjago#ninjago novel
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Happy Audio Drama Sunday! I've started working my way through my holiday backlog, so some of these episodes are from a couple of weeks ago.
@storiesfromylelmore Episode 209 - Detention: After their wild escapade last episode, the trio are in detention (worth it), and they're as hilarious as ever. I wanted to shout out the sound scaping, the rain on the windows was very soothing; noticeable but not distracting from the episode. Also I want to know what the lunch ladies were gossiping about, Ms. Yesrith and who??? I have the feeling that Keryth wasn't really supposed to be able to summon the School Blessing. Also I'm adding Blessings to my internal database of the lore of Ylelmore! 🏫
SFY Patreon Minisode - Knight AU: Y'all it is so cute to hear the kids in this AU. You definitely need to join the Patreon to hear the whole thing, it is worth it! ⚔️
Case Study: IREC-A59 - Update: No new episode, but I did get the chance to chat with the writer over the holidays! The plan for the show is 4 seasons, which have already been broadly mapped out. S1 will be 20 episodes, and work on the writing for season 2 is already underway! I can't wait for more of the world building to be revealed, as it sounds like there's a lot of thought that went into it. Also I really hope they eventually release a bloopers reel for S1 because the stories I heard sound ridiculous. 🚀
@starfallpod Act 1 Scene xviii: Oh Fel...oh Leona... </3 I'm very glad that they had their talk and are back to being besties (them not getting along was just not right), but man were those some tough things they had to share. Can we not just bundle them up with a bunch of food and keep them safe somewhere? Nothing more bad will happen to them right?? 🎭
@vestaclinicpod S2 Teaser Trailer: I. Am. So. Excited!!! S2 coming in early 2025, with cases run by the whole Vesta Clinic team!! ⚕️
@monkeymanproductions's Waiting For October S1 Episode 3 - Small Town: By the end of this episode, I just wanted to bundle Karo up in a big hug. It's clear she went through a lot as a child, and while we learned some, there's still a lot she's not saying. As someone from a small town, I can totally understand how coming back is both comforting and bringing up old wounds. It's made especially tough when a minstrel won't stop following you around singing about your life without the complete picture (not that I've had that particular event happen to me...) 🪕
@midnightburgr Welcome to the Horizon Part 9 - The Mountain: Drunk June is the best. Drunk June being proven right is even better! I'm with her, I also snorted when Deidre said the full "Deidre Peppercorns" out loud, and yes, that Verge moment was hot. I am falling in love with each of these Hood's Pocket weirdos more each episode, Edgy Steve and Flat Doug included. Also, "I mean, look at you. Of course you fell from the sky." SO smooth Deidre!! Now what up with this comet?! ☄️
#audio drama sunday#stories from ylelmore#case study: irec a59#starfall podcast#starfall#the vesta clinic#waiting for october#midnight burger#welcome to the horizon#wtth
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I hate it when people say Blackrock doesn't have decent food or have no culture at all. ''They're all to busy doing work for Blackrock to have a culture'' BITCH THERES A THING CALLED WORK CULTURE TOO. As long as there's people/demons there's going to be a basis for how they would interact with each other ''oh it's too cold to grow food there'' ??? THERES STILL A DECENT FOOD SOURCE IN COLD PLACES?? REINDEER. BIRDS. FISHES. FUCK MAYBE EVEN PENGUINS, SEALS AND WHALES SINCE THEY PROBABLY ARENT ENDANGERED IN THEIR WORLD AND IS A PROBABLE FOOD SOURCE. ASSUMING THEY DONT WASTE ANY PART THEY GET ENOUGH NUTRIENTS. They don't need to grow food to have some food. They could just hunt yk yk. Still, as much as fun to think Blackrock's region is all ice snow and rock I do want to think it's more like ''our climate cold af and our winters long and horrible but we do get summer long enough tbh'' bet their wheat and other grains is genetically engineered to be more resistant to the cold, I just searched it up and it turns out Rye is most resistant to the cold so I guess Blackrock has Rye as one their most common grain. Secondly I believe their food are PACKED with nutrients. Made to only take a small bite or two and giving you an energy boost to get trough the day, some come with a LOT of flavour some too bland, but the richer you are the more flavor choices you got. I wanna believe Blackrock makes insane bread. Bread with cheese. Bread with nuts . Bread with berries and nuts. Bread so sweet it should be dessert. Bet they bank on sandwiches too. Bet they could make grilled cheese that can kill you. I'm not forgetting demons don't need to eat but they can still want. And I'd like to think of reasons why. As funny as it is, it also feels so lazy to just say "yeah their food bland af haha" about Blackrock man
A lot of these are actually good points (and I love world building backed up by real world phenomena and whatnot!!).
I could see how “the government would want to waste resources on making actually good food for their population so it’s all over processed tasteless bars” could be an excuse but… they literally don’t need to eat. Eating in that sense would just be more of a want. Why waste resources manufacturing products that people literally don’t want,,
Honestly, seeing how their faction is portrayed (in both fan and canon material), I would say that their (work) culture would be something to the effect of the work culture of modern South Korea/Japan (with the whole thing about cram schools, insanely brutal work culture, and ALL HAIL SAMSUNG) with European influences here and there because I hc that.
But yeah that”s my two cents sorry if that went a little bit more hc-y
#phighting hot takes#phighting!#phighting roblox#roblox phighting#phighting#hot take#💬mod yapgraft💬#blackrock phighting#GLORY TO SAMSUNG
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sometimes you feel like you'll never write again, and then time goes by, the sun is shining and you think you could do anything as long as you put your mind to it....... 💪
#it's hard to remember everything passes eventually lol#hi guys#I'll be posting the first chapter of the prince aki fic soon#I decided I'll try to post the chapters as I finish them#I'm quite. nervous#because I've never made anything quite like this before#but I want to try!!!!#I'm still working out a lot of world building things#I want to make sure it's consistent before I start posting#if there's a plot hole later on. pretend u don't see#I'll also post a masterlist with a taglist if you want to be tagged in the chapters#not sure how this fic will be received... if many people will like it...#but fuck it.... we ball...#also I made a very cute elf aki for the masterlist lol#I'm impressed with the masterlist I made...#excited to share
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Just saw this comment on a story posted a month ago.
*cries in Eddie Munson Solo Series no one wanted to read, interact with or request for*
No shade to the person that commented this on their own fic if you recognize it. It's not their fault. I'm not mad at them. More crying in the tags.
#and no I didn't tag the solo series like I normally would because it's not about THAT. It's not about trying to get people to read it#It was just really ouchie to see the same concept I wrote 2 years ago get triple the notes in ONE MONTH.#and double the notes of my solo series masterlist in general in one month vs 2 years of my stories sitting there rotting#Then I see people saying they need more solo Eddie and I'm just here like my dudes I begged for requests. BEGGED. But bc I wasn't#/have never been a popular writer people don't want it from ME. It's like omg we want THIS but not like that. Not from you.#Can't help but let it get you down when nothing has changed in 2 years. It's not like I worked my way up and have the interaction now#that every other blog I used to commiserate with back in the day is getting currently. Fandom isn't a competition but it's not fair either#and I really struggle with that a lot of the time#Also yes I will concede I should be happy with the notes on the solo series because they are the highest of all the work on my page but#they're still nothing compared to what some people have just hours after posting a new story.#I saw someone complaining the other day that there are less new stories in the fandom than ever 1. That's simply not true. 2. Even if it wa#can you blame writers for giving up when readers are checking the same popular blogs over again or reading the same 5 tropes the same#2 pairings over and over. The same series? Over and over. Ignoring everything else and then complaining that their faves don't post enough?#That the popular writer with the incredible series (that rightfully deserves interaction) hasn't posted a new dad!eddie or rockstar!eddie#drabble in ages meanwhile there are writes out there pouring their souls into dad!eddie and no one reads it. There is so much rockstar Eddi#smut out there that it could sustain a brand new reader for an entire year before they needed a new fic#Idk man. I'm just feeling so defeated. I write for fun now. But there was a point in time where I desperately tried to build a platform by#offering requests and writing a lot of things I would not otherwise write to try and gain traction on my page and every time I see another#food fucking fic get hundreds of notes I get so sad that I wrote that stupid Melon fic because I had people in my life that told me#they would be excited to read it and for what? One of them still talks to me. The others moved on so fast. Most didn't even reblog it.#Some of them have since written their own food fucking fics that got triple the notes of my OG. Again. No shade to them. I don't own the#concept. It's just disheartening and fucking sad above all else. How hard I tried to get people to LIKE me and my stories. 😂#Just sad hours in general tonight my guys. Going to go and pour the bad feelings into Aftermath and then maybe make a bad life choice and#pour all my savings into an ipad#YES I KNOW first world problems. I know. That's why I try not to talk about it bc it seems so petty considering the state of the world#But you can't help what gets you down#EMMs Journal#EMM's Journal
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More misc. daily life pictures and such
#image commentary in tags once again since they don't allow captions anymore and I feel weird using the alt text for that --#1 & 2 - Very bright pretty looking sky !#2. HUGE icicle that looked like you could kill someone with it or something.. Pulled from near a gutter on the side of a building#3. & 4 & 5 - various images from a silly party I had where I pretended to be some elf king turning like 204 years old lol (also not like#a REAL party. Only my roommates were there really and we're all in the same household bubble.#just to clarify. I would never dare have a large party anyway given#my hermitous nature but on top of that.. didn't want there to be some implication that I'm having a Party while covid is still ongoing lol.#NEVER.. But I do love dressing up as some fantasy character so much.. The only thing that could ever bring a true hermit wizard#to engage with others socially is the prospect of connecting it somehow to fantasy worlds and costumes lol. One must simply dress up#as a silly 200 year old man from time to time and pretend you've never seen a balloon before in your life. etc.#6. bapy boye... feets#7. The main food that I made for the elderly elf man 'party'. which was a Deconstructed Beef Wellington (kind of as ajoke since I watch s#o many silly cooking competition shows and they always make stuff 'deconstructed' at the last minute when under time limits or whatever.)#I've wanted to make beef wellington a few times but Ithink to do it well I'd need like..an actual kitchen and a lot of time and#an oven that fully works to bake things and etc. etc. So I thought this would be an easier method. A thick steak cut round to kind of mimi#c the round tenderloin or whatever it is in a wellington. instead of the puff pastry being wrapped around - I just did star shaped cut outs#of pastry and baked them and put them on top (to go with the star theme). instead of mushroom duxelles being wrapped around in pastry#its in a little circle under the steak. and instead of mustard being brushed onto the meat I made a mustard gravy sauce type of thing#Then of course asparagus on the side.. my favorite... Though I know some wellington#also has a layer of prosciutto I think. or I saw one person use crepes. I didn't feel it was necessary to incorporate that too lol#8. bapy son helping me do a giant puzzle that took me hours and I had no idea it was actually that large of a puzzle#until I started putting it together and for some reason it made me stressed by the end instead of relaxed lol.. puzzle fatigue#photo diary
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really loving wuwa so far, it still lags a bit here and there but it kinda feels like it just has to marinate for a while? first 10 minutes are painful but after it seems like it has its assets cached or something and it isn't as much a problem anymore. it also looks like kuro games has been working overtime putting in patch fixes asfdjlkadfsj god speed to the devs fr
#0.txt#i'm all about combat gameplay and exploration so i'm having LOADS of fun on that front#i don't really have any opinions on the story yet tbh. its not bad but it's not amazing but i never have high expectations for#early game story to begin with. or gacha games in general tbh ajkladsf#i DO really like the world building in the sense of everything being made up of frequencies. it helps tie a lot of the lore together imo#my only thing is like. honestly if i didn't know who the fuck i was or where the fuck i was why would i go on this puzzle hunt for#some magistrate who i haven't even met in person. but whatever ig lol#character wise i'm running sanhua / yangyang / mortefi#sanhua is the fave here i love the charged attack mechanic where you have to release at the right moment#yangyang's cc is really useful and mortefi is also just fun lol#from trials i REALLY like using jiyan and lingyang so i hope i pull them eventually. still need to try out others though too#in general i definitely prefer the melee characters waaay more than others. i haven't liked a single rectifier yet ajskdlaf#(i got encore off the beginner banner)#my only gripe with the combat is that the range definitely feels a bit small like if you're a little too far away you won't hit the enemy#i'm eager to actually figure out proper playstyles though. i do actually like that effectively just button mashing also works#but it's also super satisfying understanding a character's exact gameplay mechanics#i have not even looked at character building though that is a whatever until it suddenly clicks fadkflaf
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(Out of nowhere, you are approached by a familiar lightbulb-headed Cog.)
Ah, it's you, cat. Thinking you're oh-so-slick. Muttering and whispering under those raggedy whiskers of yours... Thinking I am unable to hear it all...
Well, you've simply underestimated my fantastic hearing. You probably want to know the reason why I'm here, taking a 'break' from my incredibly important scientific breakthroughs? It's quite simple, really!
(She gets close, and squints her eyes.)
I know what you are.
Farewell, now!
(She then leaves the way she came from.)
(Spam giggles immensely, covering her face... it always seems like she's giggling, isn't she? This lasts... at least thirty seconds. Longer than usual.)
And I know what I am too, Sparky! You broke through something, that's for sure. Really, broke through...
(She looks down, continuing to laugh nervously.)
You know, I find it odd you Havent tried to bulb blast me into the stratosphere by now. I mean knowing how you acted with Frostbite. Is there something peculiar about me that you perhaps can't quite track? Something about me that you... don't know what I am?
I know, I know, I'm talking to nobody again. But you were there when I had a moment today with the one the only Frostbite The Bravecog. You may be remaining. Lurking in the shadows. Knowing about these thoughts that I'm thinking.
(The giggling resumes, lasting far shorter this time.)
Your brother's a piece of fucking barp, by the way
(She braces for impact for a few seconds, wincing while smiling, before comically looking around to realize nobody's there. She sighs.)
Wow, okay maybe toony superhero show logic doesn't apply in this situation. Cool.
WAIT I JUST FUCKING REALIZED WHAT SHE MEANT but like. Dude if she meant that then what's the point I mean the whole ahh sellbot department barping knows unless you're Really low on the ladder. Heheh... maybe she did mean what I thought she meant.
Oh i'm so fucking screwed. What kind of bitch gets filament fever
#bright spark#<- for finding this again later. haha i called her sparky#the way she talks fucking tickles my brain so much im so . ohguohguohoghog SHE#SORRY THAT THIS TOOK SO LONG you see i was in the mindset that i would do this one little thing and then i would do my work which uh.#that leads to so so SO much procrastination. including on fun things! oh so fun things.#today was an event.#i also spent quite a bit of time ruminating i “would she really say that” is worse when shes literally you#to clarify. she is spam's aunt by like. building standards. not really in her found family. so its fucked up but as i said in discord this#is like. a “your mom's kinda hot” level crush. you know. also sorry i really wanted to say filament fever its been eating at me okay#nothing SERIOUS the way my f/os (and spam's f/os (plural now?? i guess?? if today was a canon event)) are#honestly mark still feels like the only real one with her to me but damn it. if spam's reflecting My Changes then she's Reflecting My Chang#spam in toontown unlike my other sonas is the most “its just you again” out of all of them and thats partially because her main#cog connection... is frostbite. they bounce off each other like we literally bounce off each other and damn it shes been so stagnant on her#own because of it. mark happened and she mirrored that because i kept fucking talking about him while we were in character and ideally#i should TRY to fix her. but also man because i'm not doing Serious lore stuff with her i dont. even know if i want to.#i kinda brushed it over the rug by saying that she relies on her constant entertainment so readily because she herself still doesnt feel#like she has a place outside of cogs only. sure she's in high roller backstage sure she's in allan's family now but shes not Doing anything#with herself the way that her friends are. mole's a ranger. frostbite cohosts. wishes... has chip. and something she doesn't have--#living and fully growing as a toon. rather than being haphazardly slapped into a world. and in some respects she's envious of frostbite#finding themselves so quickly because she distracts herself because she's still kinda struggling with it. despite everything. yes she lives#happy and carefree a lot of the time but she keeps buying those dumb phones because when she's truly alone... her mind starts to wander.#that's what mark is for. so that spam can dream of a world where she has a purpose. even if its fake and fragile and just nothing compared#to the great friends that she already has. where she feels like its worth it doing something when she doesn't have anyone. and in that#respect. with the goons ma allan parallels in sonboy the spam cathal parallels shine. seeking tv (and to a lesser extent games) as a#method of escapism. even when one's life is already pretty good. because there's nothing else worth doing without friends or family.#the internet isn't just cool. it gives her something to be when it seems like everyone is something but her. and maybe thats a lazy#excuse for why it seems like she doesnt HAVE anything to call her own but that but damn it i'm trying my best to twist it around.#spam has such a HISTORY yknow? even if it feels like i havent established her much.#spam is the hearts to frostbite's spades not just because they're the duo of all time but because spam's fake stupid love keeps her going#sorry i just started rambling in the tags of this post about spam it. happens. she loves her friends so much i need to reiterate that okay
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(( I find it cute and sweet to see how many people headcanon N's birthday to Pi day! That's really creative and sweet, and cute for him to get PIES then too heeheheh.
For Nat I went with a different angle, I made his birthday September 18th. Why? That's when pokemon B&W was released first in Japan! So that's the date I set to Nat's Birthday. He's just a sweet boy though and is happy enough to just be remembered. Though food is always a way to win him over. He's happy to share with anyone who asks and his Pokemon friends too! Best a sweet boy.
My bad end AU Naal, however.... I haven't set his just yet. He lacks the core memory of that time (I mean yeah, he'd have been a babbu) and his thoughts are foggy. He remembers little snippets of early memories and he remembers the chill of cold [which was brought away into the warmth when he was adopted by the Pokemon in the forest] attached to his early memories. So likely some time late fall through winter. Somewhere in there. Not that it entirely matters to him because he's never had his birthday be celebrated. Someone get my sad boy Naal a cake or two. Let him eat cake instead of burning down Unova for once. ;w; ))
#pokemon#n harmonia#(( ooc. ))#character thoughts#world building#(( ... kind of ))#(( I'm still working on remaking this start up for my versions of them. I have ideas and core elements. I just need to get the skeleton ))#(( laid out for green lighting a go ahead and the big thing... the art. ))#(( there's a lot is very nice asks I need to answer in the meantime too. ))#(( please remember I do draw my asks responses so that can be a factor of why I'm so slow...))#(( that and bad life situation ))#(( I'm currently pet and house sitting though so that gives me a little quiet time. ))#(( thank you to the people who stick with me despite my tough IRL times ))#(( love you all and hope your day is amazing ♡ ))
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I mostly concur with the above reblogger, but I wanted to add one thing:
I wouldn't say that anything you do will have zero impact. There are SOME things you can do that will have an impact, if you choose to put your time and energy into this issue. (Which you are not obligated to do, to be clear, unless you have some sort of role or job which implies that sort of responsibility.)
You aren't necessarily helpless. But subscribing to OP's mindset is a really good way to make yourself helpless.
I've seen that mindset, repeatedly. I had that mindset, at one point in time. You know what changed that, more than anything else? Becoming an actual activist.
The activists who hold on to the mindset that a mental health break is selfish? The ones that can't or won't emotionally distance themselves? The ones that don't acknowledge their right to care for themselves because someone, somewhere is suffering worse than them? They don't last, and they don't help.
The good ending for that road is to burn out, and then not be able to help anymore. The bad ending is to fall heavily into compassion fatigue, and then be so desensitized and unable to care that you cause real harm. Or there's the other bad ending, which is that you neglect yourself so thoroughly that you end up hurt, sick, or dead (and maybe hurt others while you are at it). You might even manage to do all three of these things.
If you want to make a real impact on more than a minuscule scale, you not only need to allow yourself mental health breaks (which, yes, sometimes include disengaging completely), you need to accept that they aren't selfish at all. They are sometimes the only way you'll be able to preserve your ability to help. Feeling personally affected by an issue is valid, and sometimes unavoidable, but it doesn't correlate to how much of a difference you make.
Hurting yourself doesn't automatically help others. Many of us have heard metaphor which references the airplane safety instruction to put on your oxygen mask before helping others do so. It's a good metaphor. A suffocating person isn't going to thank you for the valiant gesture of suffocating yourself alongside them, when you had the option to save the both of you.
I believe in sacrifice, in some cases. I believe in acknowledging my privilege. But sacrifice generally implies that you are giving something up to help someone else. If you are just giving something up… it's more suffering in the world, not less.
Do you want to actually help? I bet you there are activism campaigns that would love to have you, in a variety of forms and levels of commitment. Including entirely remote efforts, if you aren't in a position or location to engage in in-person efforts. That goes for any cause, not just this one.
And you'll make a lot more difference in that sphere if you prioritize your impact, instead of your devotion to the issue.
i think anyone who is genuinely worried about their mental health bc of the situation in gaza probably needs to reformat their way of thinking about it. the answer is not to take a “mental health break” where you pretend whats happening in gaza doesnt exist and stop being vocal and refuse to hear people around you who are vocal. the way to do that “mental health break” much more effectively and not selfishly would be to remove yourself from constant streams of idiotic and/or murderously evil people. stop watching tiktok debates. stop reading genocidal reddit comments and news articles from sources you KNOW want palestine dead. stop putting the focus on the murderers and keep your attention on sympathy and love for the murdered, on hope and optimism (even if naive) and activism to do your part in making things better. dont get me wrong the murderers still need to be dealt with but if you as an individual feel like you’re getting too overwhelmed with despair to be helpful, the answer is to shift your focus away from those causing the despair, not to ignore and abandon those who have to actually live through it.
#activism wank#That's my tag for this sort of thing now.#compassion#compassion fatigue#burnout#mental health#guilt tripping#activism#copying my tags from my original reblog:#See: Clickhole article 'Selfish: This Man Found Time To Build A Birdhouse While JonBenét Ramsey’s Murder Is Still Unsolved'#There are so many important issues in this world. Many of them truly horrible and deliberate atrocities.#One person is not physically nor mentally capable of talking about every issue that needs to be talked about. Not even just in passing.#You are not going to have an impact that way either. There are people suffering in horrible ways all around this planet.#You can feel guilty for not talking about every single one of them. Or you can majorly help a few of them by focusing your time.#We live in a society for a reason. We specialize our professions because that works. Impactful activists specialize too.#I doubt OP is actively reading about every ongoing major human rights violation. Or even just ones Western countries are complicit in.#I never see this take about COVID anymore for that matter. Most people have more obligation and impact on that issue than Palestine.#So maybe we all instinctively understand that emotional reactions to every single important issue will hurt us and help no one.#Anyone has the right to their own hurt and pain and anger (though I would caution you to recognize when it reaches the point of self-harm).#But demanding it of others is unfair and harmful. And you don't have to let others or your own anxiety/guilt to demand that of you.#Compassion fatigue is real. We don't expect trained professionals to handle the burden of emotional involvement in every important case.#Why on Earth should we expect that of random strangers we know nothing about?#It's a lot kinder to distance yourself than it is to burn yourself out trying to care about everything and lose your compassion entirely.#That's part of why we get medical professionals who start with selfless motivations but are callous/cruel to patients a few years later.#I like making an impact and I'm not going to be sorry that I have to focus my mental effort to do that. I am one human.#My guilt isn't praxis. My pain and emotional investment isn't some sort of boon to the less privileged people of the world.#Also I help less when I have to spend time and energy to fend off people expecting an obligation from me that I didn't sign up for.#I DO engage in real-life political activism. Whenever I-P is in the news I usually have to take a break due to harassment from leftists.#Which is the kind of pointed irony you'd expect from a particularly unsubtle Star Trek episode.#palestine
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I spent so much money during the holiday season (half on myself, half on family), but. While I am slightly ashamed (being unemployed most of the year, and spending pretty much everything I was getting while working holiday immediately), my satisfaction with what I've been getting feels pretty good.
Like. I had a small bit of reasoning in that I was only guaranteed to be working holiday, so I wanted to heavily use my worker's discount (retail) while also taking advantage of good holiday sales. Got a healthy mix of 'things I will need in the future/improve my quality of life immediately' and 'I don't need this but I like it so now it's mine'. I will probably lose most of my shame of spending money in a month or so, when cards are paid off and I start actually accumulating money again, since I was kept on after holiday. I'd like to be able to stop looking at my balance and worrying about maintaining a certain amount and just vibe again.
#I've had bouts of spending in the past#But it was just. A Lot. This past year#Like more than double compared to the last few years#It was a dangerous mix of my store discount and sales I'm constantly aware of by being at work#And thinking that I only really have a few months to take full advantage before I might be let go#(And then making a few discoveries of websites I could buy fun things. Merch I'd never considered could be available)#(...I got so much Pokemon stuff. And jewelry. And Pokemon jewelry that was cheap/affordable)#(My willpower on things I know are limited time/stock is nonexistant)#Though my willpower against jewelry in general should be stronger in the future#I was mostly building up a variety of the various accessories in select styles#And since I still have a job; and I know jewelry comes and goes all the time and tends to repeat styles through the seasons#I'm okay with missing out on things instead of feeling a 'got to buy it now or never'#The jewelry only hit real hard because I realized I could. Actually wear it#Which sounds silly but I worked so much and never had time for anything/never could really wear anything#But after finding clip on adapters for earrings and some cute bracelets#I realized '...I can wear this to work'. Just not necklaces (which was really all I had on hand) because there's too much on my neck#And I had zero rings so. I clearly needed to get some of those; too#Opened a whole new world (of sparkly stuff to spend money on)
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I'm... Wh- what?!
That's terrifying!! And also awesome as hell! But aaaaaaaaaa!!! Just... the moon crashing? And I literally just watched Grian's Episode 3 where they launch people with fishing rods, and I was so confused why Grian's comment of "Is the moon big?" activated the fight or flight response of people in the comments. This is hilarious that this is how I find out about the context. Though it makes sense, given what further context is given in the post's comments. Wicked way to end a season early.
Also, if I had a dime for every time the moon has crashed and caused massive destruction in a video game, I'd actually have 3 dimes. Which still isn't a lot, but it's so weird that it's happened three times now XD. Majora's Mask, FF14, and now Hermitcraft. That's so funny. Thank you @salamencerobot for at-ing me, and also being the push to finally watch Hermitcraft. I'm having a blast watching it.
okay so:
the year is 2021. the month is june. the new season of hermitcraft, season 8, has just started, and everything is great! the hermits are all messing around, having fun, building insane things within the first week of the server being active, and generally having a good time. everyone's collected themselves into little factions, pranking each other, and it's all the fun, lighthearted, mostly-vanilla content hermitcraft is known for.
and then the split between minecraft versions 1.18 and 1.19 is announced. the delay of new terrain, and especially of new mobs like the warden, considerably disrupt several of the hermits' plans. but it's fine, they'll figure something out, they're professionals, and it mostly goes unnoticed.
about two weeks later, on november 9th, grian turns to mumbo jumbo in one of his episodes, and asks the famous question that would seal hermitcraft season 8's fate:
"mumbo, is the moon... big?"
suddenly, the fans panic. they search back through videos and streams, and realize that the moon had been abnormally large and stuck in a full-moon phase since october 30th. the Moon Big event has begun.
this is where the roleplay really starts. once the moon's size has been brought up, the hermits start a weird combination of scrambling to figure out why the moon's growing, and how to stop it- but also of ignoring it, hoping it won't be a problem, hoping someone else will deal with it. the moon keeps getting bigger, more hermits start realizing it's going on, and a creeping sense of dread starts to grow. but it's fine. it's fine, right? they do little plotlines like this all the time. they'll figure something out, the moon will go back to normal, and we'll laugh about it when this is all over. it's fine.
and then, blocks start flying away. just floating up out of the ground, and falling right back down! like for a moment, a square meter chunk of dirt has decided it's a ballerina and leaped out of the ground! but it's fine, right? the blocks are coming back. no lasting harm is done. they're going to fix it all... right?
the moon gets bigger. it's growing every day- local hermit weirdguy joe hills measures it every stream. the blocks start flying higher. gravity starts getting... weird, with players getting the slow falling effect at random, and being lifted off of the earth themselves. the players form cults and rituals and whatnot to try and appease the moon, convince it to leave them alone, making plans to escape. nothing works. things keep getting worse, and the moon keeps getting bigger. but it'll be fine. these storylines never leave lasting harm, or at least they never have before. they'll be fine.
and then the blocks stop coming back, just floating into the sky forever. the players have the slow falling effect more than they don't now. the moon is now so big it's visible even during the day, and fills the entire sky at night. they start planning their escapes in earnest, and say their goodbyes. some hermits jump into a void hole in the overworld (it was the centerpiece of their village). some flee to the End, some to the nether, some just fly with elytras and hope they can get far enough away in time. one brave hermit, tango, flies himself to the moon in a futile attempt to blow the whole thing up before it can crash.
but in the end, the moon crashes into the server, and everything they'd built was destroyed. and the whole time, there'd been nothing any of them could've done. season eight was over, a full six months before anyone had expected it to end, and season nine wouldn't start until about three months later. and im still not okay about it.
(here's a cool animatic of the moon's crash! honestly i dont think you need too much hermitcraft knowledge to get the gist)
(also the moon crash happened on the day before my birthday lmao.)
….
holy shit
#lel#absolute favorite#hey what the fuck#thanks for the at!#tag rant#hermitcraft#hermitcraft s10#I'm also adoring how Grian has started a fishing cult. either an intervention needs to happen or he needs to get that damn Mending book XD#also enjoying the big brother/little sister vibe that Etho and Gem have going. it's so wholesome.#so far I've watched Etho and Gem and Grian up to their most recent episodes. and then am planning to watch Pearl and Scar's episodes#Oh and maybe Tango's too. I have a lot of perspectives I want to watch. it helps that some things overlap#I also find it hilarious how we have a fishing rod space program now. absolutely grand. I hope they make a build out of it.#it'll be interesting to see the result of this Demise game too. Not many people left from what I gather!#this has also inspired me to revisit my old minecraft worlds as well and work on them. I have a 1.14 world where i live in an archipelago#and then a 1.16 world where I plan to thoroughly explore the new (to me) Nether. and then 1.19 is my most recent world.#I have a 1.20 world but it's a Chunklock world (Data Pack where you have to unlock chunks with items). still super fun though!#And it has a Cherry biome! So ye. lots of fun with Minecraft this week.#just realized you can move the order of tags on desktop btw. I have spent so much time on mobile that i miss this stuff existing
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holiday (3tan special) | myg
title: holiday pairing: 3tan!yoongi x reader(f) series: masterlist | three tangerines | fireworks | house party | basketball | stay | sidewalk talk | friends | dalo | like that | anytime | sundress season | yoongi’s interlude | forfeit | flutter | video call | busted | broken (pt. 1) | broken (pt. 2) | lollipop rating/genre: pg (18+) ; fluff ; brother’s best friend au, implied age gap au, holiday au summary: from what you can gather, holiday gift exchanges are supposed to be pretty straightforward. but this one quickly escalates. because no one can follow directions. note: this is all thanks to the person that suggested a 3tan crew secret santa! they don’t do actual secret santa, but they do host a gift exchange. so enjoy this speedily but still tenderly written holiday special! i wanted to get it posted asap so that we could all have it during the holiday season. hope it helps lifting spirits in any way<3 warnings: yoongi looks like sin, but reader does too🤭, kissing, no one follows directions, but especially jimin, hella kissing, no fr jimin is chaos incarnate, sibling holiday woes, tense situations, tender moments, gift exchanges, dialogue heavy i’m so sorry, also not too edited i'm sorry again sdfkljdskl. reader is adorable y'all i wanna cry, 3tan crew being wholesome af drop date: december 27th, 2024, 8:37pm est word count: 8.1k bc i love y’all???
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“Wait… I’m in this, too?”
Your brother winces while checking his phone, probably also seeing the texts that Jimin sent to a freshly created group chat. “Tae and Chim roped us in this time. But it’s cool if you don’t wanna.”
As you both don work attire in your foyer, you shake your head, one hand firm on your bag strap, “I don’t even know how they work.”
“I think we random draw names. Then just give a gift to whoever we get.”
Seeing the names and numbers in here, you’re already running through a lot of possibilities. Maybe too many possibilities. But you don’t wanna make things more complicated or awkward, so you quickly concede, “I mean.. I’m down if you are.”
“I guess it’s cool.”
Head lowered, you notice that your brother’s shoes are the ones you gave him for his birthday a couple years ago. Because those days are the only ones you both celebrate every passing run of three hundred and sixty-five. “At least we’re doing something this year.”
He chuckles to his feet. “Two years in a row.”
Your sad laugh tumbles and rolls next to his. “Wild.”
“Hey.” When he pauses, it’s to wait for you to look up. “If you ever wanna talk about it, we can.”
There are a lot of times in which you dismiss your brother. Because it’s just what siblings do.
This time is not one of them.
“Same,” you offer, the weight of the world dragging your smile down.
He gives you a hug, and you feel the luxury press of his suit as you lean in with scrunched brows.
Two years in a row.
Maybe things do suck less with time.
When you both head out the door to your cars, you wonder if your brother knows how much you appreciate him and his friends for including you in things. Even if you don’t show it as much as you need to.
Guess this time of year is a good place to start.
Work drags in the wake of oncoming holiday.
But you’re learning to appreciate the decorations around the office, including the little cards that coworkers have given you at your desk—despite your many protests that they didn’t have to.
When you look up, you start to notice other things. Like the way people smile just a little more. Or the way peppermint and cider waft around the building, smelling of sweet instead of spice.
You wonder if Jungkook has decorated the studio, too. Or if he recruited everyone else to help with decorations, which means that Yoongi and the guys had to fuss with lights and whatever else people spend money on.
Laughing to your many stacks of papers and documents, you start daydreaming of what it would be like to decorate the house.
Would you and your brother do it someday? You do admit that it’s kinda nice to look around the neighborhood. And when you went into the mountains last year, you concede that the surrounding town decor was pretty inviting.
Maybe your house would be a little brighter on the inside too if you both just…
You get a notification on your phone. When the screen brightens, you see that it’s for the app that shuffles you all for the gift exchange.
You have no fucking clue what you’re doing.
But here goes.
Opening and hoping you get someone that’s easy to please, you stare at your device and blink a few very hard times.
And after every time, you still get a name that has your heart quickening faster than reindeer working overtime. It’s reindeer, right? You think that’s cor—
“You okay?”
Snapping your head up, you notice that one of your coworkers stopped mid-stride to check on you. Staring at his candy cane tie, you try not to be distracted as you slightly cringe,
“What do I get a guy for the holidays?”
“Friend or lover?”
Well, that was not what you expected to hear!
When your jaw unhinges, you’re quick to snap it back into place. “Umm.”
“Oh, this is juicy,” he perks up, quickly settling into a nearby chair and resting a strong chin in his hand. “Tell me more, I got time.”
Laughing, you shake your head while pretending to type on your computer. “Nothing to tell.”
“That means you got a whole lot.” His eyes are way too shiny right now! “But alright, I’m gonna assume both. In which case, I suggest something nice.”
“Something nice?”
“You know, like. Nice nice.”
“It’s for a gift exchange, though,” you slump, hands stopping on the keys. Looking at his whole holiday ensemble, you divulge, “The money limit’s definitely not enough for nice nice.”
“Then fuck the limit?”
Your answer is more of a sound than a word.
But he does get you to consider, even if just for a little bit. “Maybe…”
“Fuck the limit,” he advises again. “He’s gonna dig that. Especially since everyone will see it.”
Your face falls from the snowy sky. “Everyone?”
“Uhh, yeah? You said gift exchange, right? Everyone sees what everyone gets.”
“Oh. Right,” you pretend to agree to your computer. Because no, you actually didn’t know that. “Guess it’s been awhile.”
“Well, that’s what makes it fun! Good luck.”
While you would normally agree, you have a whole hoard of conflicting feelings. Because while seeing Yoongi’s name on your screen is enough to get you giddy as hell, you know there’s a couple people that may not share the same sentiments. Especially if you gift him something nice nice.
In front of everybody.
However…
As your striped and jingling coworker strides away with a hum, you drum your fingers on your minimally decorated desk.
Maybe there is a way you can finess this.
After a few weeks, the day has come for not just one exchange, but two—your friends also decided to have your own. Because it’s the easiest format, you convinced them with logic, seeing their shock at you being the one to suggest the exchange in the first place.
When they asked if you were sure, you assured them that it was okay. And the way they all brightened told you that you made a sound decision. Even if they still seemed hesitant, you know it’s because…
You’ve never done this.
So as you observe everyone in your bare living room, you start to see how their presence alone illuminates the space, with gifts in shine and glitter painting the area in holiday colors.
This is nice.
“So… Uhh.” You clear your throat, watching everyone look at you at the head of your coffee table. “How do we do this?”
They all laugh before Taehyung explains, “So one of us goes first and says who we got before giving the gift—you can sit, you know.”
In the midst of more teasing, you settle onto the floor while exclaiming, “I’m nervous, okay! This is really new to me.”
“You have a gift to give, right?”
“Yeah?”
“Then you’re already doing great,” Reia assures, and you’re even more excited to give yours away. Because you drew her name.
But before you can say that, Taehyung continues, “So after someone gets their gift, they announce who they picked, and so on.”
“Pretty straightforward,” you observe. “I wanna go first!”
Dom cackles, “You just wanna get it out of the way.”
“And?” you question, grinning when you shoot up and grab your very amateurishly wrapped bag. “Okay, okay, I got…”
“This is adorable,” Yuri cuts in, and everyone’s agreement makes you suddenly shy.
“No! Don’t make fun.”
“We aren’t!” Taehyung reaches out to rub your leg. “Promise. Who’d you get?”
“I got… Reia!” You exclaim, raising your bag a bit as she yells with everyone. The sudden raise of noise gets you a little shocked, but hyped nonetheless. And maybe a bit nervous that your gift won’t live up to the excitement. “Sorry about the wrapping job.”
“What are you talking about, this is so good,” Reia soothes, smiling wide as she delicately takes out the folded paper. “Wow, the wrapping is nice?”
Dom chimes in as she leans in, “Yeah, this is too good. Did you watch videos?”
“Uh huh.”
Everyone laughs again as you keep your nose held high. Because sucky or not, you were not gonna half-ass your first ever gift exchange. With seasoned people, at that. No way.
When Reia opens the gift you carefully picked while perusing through a local music store, you watch with the anticipation of a small child, eyes wide and waiting. Hoping that the best outcome is the real outcome.
And when she quietly yells behind her hand, everyone cheers while asking what she got. When she turns the package around, they cheer even more, because it’s a guitar pick set in her favorite colors. And one that you knew was so, very much her.
She stands up immediately and opens her arms for a hug, and you blink before getting lovingly crushed.
“Thank you,” she whispers in your ear. “This is more than great.”
“Of course, babe,” you murmur back, feeling her jean jacket under your palms and a beating in your chest. “Thank you, too.”
The rest of the exchange goes off without a hitch, with you cheering with everyone and understanding the cues more and more. Everyone’s gifts are wonderful, and Yuri’s the last to go out of the five of you.
And she got your name.
You figured giving the gift would be the hardest part.
But somehow, this part is a lot harder.
Braving it anyway—because there’s ironically no time like the present—you carefully unwrap the thin package and stare at what’s inside.
It’s a photocard. But the picture is of the five of you, one that Taehyung took with his long ass arms while the four of you huddled behind him with drinks in hand. Around its edges are stickers, hearts and stars and cute little animals.
And it’s the most precious thing you’ve ever seen.
You don’t even realize you’re crying until Yuri rushes over to ask if you don’t like it.
“This is the best thing ever,” you choke out, and she smiles before laughing and tearing up, too. “I love us.”
“We’re the best, duh.”
“Got that right,” Dom adds to the air while Reia and Taehyung start cleaning up the wrapping scraps. “You like your first gift exchange?”
“I should’ve joined y’all sooner.”
“Joined us?” Taehyung looks up from the ground. “What do you mean?”
“Oh. I figured you guys do this every year.”
Tae looks at Yuri, who then looks at you again before very seriously admitting, “We’ve never done this, either. Not with each other.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.” She taps the back of your now most precious, most coveted photocard ever. “We didn’t even think about it since you wouldn’t be there.”
Smiling at your prized possession, you vow,
“I’ll be here now.”
Regarding all of them, you start to decorate your place in your mind. Seeing where all the lights go. Where all the little trinkets hang, or whatever. You don’t quite know how this goes just yet, but you do know there’s trees involved. So that’s gonna be figured out in a year’s time.
“I’m not missing this again.”
With bellies full of laughter and a little bit of cider, you and your friends head over to Jimin’s cul-de-sac.
Dom took the wheel this time, so you get to stare out the passenger side window, eyes reflecting golds and colors as you take in the surrounding lights.
Were they always this pretty? You don’t remember being so taken by electricity and staggering electric bills, especially the houses that go all out and cover every nook of their yard in lights.
But it’s a spectacle on every corner and street, and Jimin’s little half circle of houses keeps the holiday illumination alive.
“Uhh, I think we can park down there,” you point, noticing there’s some space a little bit beyond the street. It’s alarmingly next to where Yoongi had to park once, and you cherish that memory with stars in your eyes.
“Everyone have their gifts?”
“Tae, if anyone lost theirs on the way here, we have other issues.”
It’s a quick walk to Jimin’s, and the music around the house gets louder as you approach his entrance. There are people already set up in his open garage playing what you assume are card games, and everyone greets your group as you pop in to say hi.
“Hey!” Namjoon calls. “Y’all are late! Everyone’s inside.”
“We had our own party first,” you call out, struggling with your gift bags and food tray. “Can someone—”
Before you finish your ask, you smell nice cologne and feel a big presence at your side.
When you look to see who’s assisting, you slow in your motions before uttering a small,
“Thank you.”
Jungkook slightly smiles as he grabs your last bag. “Your perfume’s nice,” he compliments behind tousled bangs. Which makes you blink because that comment is more than hard to come by from him.
So you can only grin. “Just got it,” you explain as you follow your friends inside the house. “It’s a dupe, can you believe it?”
“Damn! It’s a good one.”
“I know,” you agree, very proud of your find. Taking the gift bags from his hands, you tilt your head. “Can you bring the tray to the kitchen?”
“On it.”
When you make your way to your friends at the front area, they all eye you with concern. But you wave it off and shrug off your coat to hang on the loan coat hanger—earning teasing and whistles.
“Shut up,” you groan, laughing with everyone before straightening the reason for the noises. It’s a dress you’ve been eyeing specifically for holiday parties. Because as soon as you started to shop for your gift exchanges, that quickly spiraled into shopping for outfits to wear to them. Did your coworker spook you into looking good because it was a public event? Maybe. Absolutely.
So you shopped around before finding a dress that even you knew you looked good in. And the past couple weeks were the longest stretches ever because of your anticipation to wear it again.
As you and your newest fit walk into the kitchen, you start to greet everyone, giving them hugs and smiling bright at their compliments. Because you feel good. You feel nice. Maybe you’re just drinking the holiday cheer and letting it consume you but you don’t care because it’s fun this time. This isn’t like any other year, and it’s wonderful.
But then.
Even the most wonderful moments have to come to a halt.
And yours crash when you see Yoongi.
Leaned back on one of the kitchen counters, his body appears relaxed in another damn black button-up, telltale silver chain hanging from a neck you wanna devour in front of the whole house.
He was already annoying last year. But this time, his hair’s longer, and made up with just the right amount of disarray and a little bit even tucked behind his ear.
Fuck, this is so much worse!
If he wasn’t so attractive and magnetizing, you’d have way less than ninety-nine problems. It would be a lot closer to zero.
But you make your way over to him anyway, because of course you would. Of course he knew you would, too.
“Hi,” you greet him, hands tingling with the desire to cup his beautiful chin and yank him in for a kiss.
But he greets you back while giving you a hug, not without giving you a very obvious once-over.
“Beautiful,” he whispers in your ear before pulling away, which can only make you babble out,
“What?”
He grins wide. “You look nice.”
Oh. Oh, he really did say that. Why are you surprised? Why are you always surprised? But you have to stay poised so you stick with a neutral,
“So do you.”
“Thanks,” he says with a sly curve, still leaning back on the counter with a drink in hand. “Say something else.”
“Goodbye forever,” is what you go with, back heating with his staccato laughs following your speedy retreat.
No, no, no. He cannot notice how excited you are to give him his gift. Your bubbling excitement needs to be projected elsewhere. Because you know you picked perfect. It’s something you know he’d appreciate.
But he cannot have his ego inflated anymore or else the house would float to the sky.
But fucking hell, he looks damn good and he knows it.
After an hour or so of socializing and keeping to your little friend circle, Jimin gets everyone together in the big living room to do the exchange.
“Okay! One, two… Okay, we’re all here, so. Who’s gonna start?”
When someone calls his name, the man grins and shakes his head. “Nah, I’m host.”
“So shouldn’t you be the one to start?”
“My house, my rules!” Jimin argues with zest, pointing to the guy that dared to challenge him, “So you go first.”
And that man just so happens to secretly be yours.
Shouts erupt around the living room, and you can mostly hear Hoseok and Seokjin since they’re closest,
“Go, Yoong!”
“Ah, Yoongi’s first for a change.”
Secretly and not so secretly, you’re hoping and wishing that he pulled your name. But the odds of that would be pretty slim if you pulled him, even though it was an even chance across the board.
But as he gets up from the arm of Jimin’s couch holding a small gift bag, you determine that maybe it’s best if he didn’t pull your name. Because you already had trouble opening Yuri’s gift. How the hell would you control yourself opening his?
“K, uhh. I got…”
Wait, he’s looking towards you from across the room.
Shit. Is it happening?
You?
“Taehyung.”
A pang of disappointment and relief shoots through your veins, even when you shout with everyone while watching Tae smile from his place right next to you.
Yoongi walks right up to your seats, which are really some extra fold-out chairs by Jimin’s decorated tree. And he smells so good. Why do you have to be close to him again?
But this moment is about Taehyung, so you watch as he opens the gift. When there’s a small box inside the bag, he opens that to reveal a nice, slim… wallet?
Wait, is that leather?
Your mouth drops as everyone’s up and raising questions already, and you can clearly hear Jungkook and your brother protest the highest,
“Wait, huh?”
“We set a limit for a reason!”
Yoongi’s hands stay in his pockets when he refutes, “It was on sale.”
“Nah, he’s lying!”
Taehyung doesn’t know what to say, so when he looks at you, it takes all your strength to encourage him neutrally,
“It’s so you! Deserved.”
Yoongi looks at you before asking your friend, “Is it okay?”
“It’s perfect,” Taehyung says, full of gratefulness. “I’m just shocked.”
Jimin and Shiv chuckle from one of the couches,
“Oh? He’s never shocked.”
“This is new.”
Yoongi smiles as Tae gets up to hug him, and you’re immediately okay not being the one receiving anything right now.
Because you don’t need anything from him.
All you want is his happiness.
Once the initial gift is given, everyone goes down the line. And you’re feeling a little lighter after knowing who Yoongi got. Also, you feel less and less awkward about your gift, since the chaos of Yoongi’s was only the beginning.
Because when Taehyung gifts your brother a chain, everyone’s up and yelling again while your sibling is shocked to hell.
On one end of the living room, Namjoon shakes his grinning head while Jungkook throws his back,
“Alright, there needs to be a penalty for the most expensive gift.”
“We obviously didn’t give a shit about the limit.”
Everyone’s laughter fills the house, even drowning out the faint holiday music floating from the surround speakers.
Immediately clipping on his necklace, your brother shouts, “Am I the only one that stuck to what we agreed on?”
“Sucks for who got yours then.”
Everyone starts laughing or reprimanding Yoongi for saying that—you with a cackle included.
But then your brother busts out a fucking watch for Shiv and everyone goes bananas.
At this point, Taehyung’s fully laughing behind his fingers on his forehead, and Jimin collapses on a gawking Yoongi when Shiv quite literally jumps up.
“What the hell? Dude, I can’t take this.”
“Yes, you can! And you will.”
Fingers are pointing in every direction while people are calling each other liars, and your brother laughs on like a gremlin.
But it’s all so adorable that your heart is squeezing. Shiv’s damn near tearing up. “I’ve been eyeing this one for forever.”
“I know! You wouldn’t stop running your damn mouth about that thing.” Your older sibling claps him on the shoulder. “You can shut up now,” he says with a grin, and Shiv gives him a big hug.
“Thanks, man.”
“Don’t sweat it.”
Shiv’s turn. And everyone is waiting for what he decided to gift.
Turns out he keeps the shenanigans going by gifting Jungkook a luxury tie set.
The blond’s jaw drops as he stares hard at the package. Looking up quick, he has to ask for sure, “A set, dude?”
“It was on sale!”
“Again?”
“Are we all gonna say the same lie?”
Everyone can’t hide their amusement, with creased eyes and fake annoyance in every seat. Jungkook can’t believe his luck, since he’s been telling himself to get dress clothes forever but hasn’t gotten around to it.
“You gotta dress like a man now, kid,” Shiv tells him with a bright smile. “There’s a lot coming now that you’re making it.”
A light bulb softly glows when you realize that Yoongi might need to do the same. Trying not to look obvious, you peek in his direction.
As he stares at the floor, you already know he’s mulling over the same thoughts.
But it’s Jungkook’s turn now, and you still haven’t gotten a gift yet.
So you’re waiting with all the air in your lungs.
As the blond teases his pick, the studio boys are quick to handle him as Yoongi only huffs.
“I got… I got… I got, I got, I got, I got—”
“Kook, just say it.”
“Always like this.”
“Jimin!”
Your heart beats again as the host pops up from his couch, everyone cheering as Kook meets him in the center. Around you, speculation from your friends mixed with a little laughter spikes,
“He probably stuck to the limit.”
“Definitely.”
“Jimin’s gonna be the only one left with—”
Cackles and screams rip as Jimin kicks his head back in laughter, because in his hands is a sleek white box that everyone recognizes.
This man got Jimin designer shades.
Your cheeks hurt as you react with everyone, giddy and bubbly with how absolutely ridiculous this whole night has gone. Everyone accusing each other of cheating, while all the while every single gift has been over the top.
You really don’t feel bad about revealing your gift anymore. Quite honestly, you almost feel more bad about it not being enough.
No. It’s enough.
Yours is the best and you stick to that.
Jimin takes the sunglasses out of the box and protective pouch, slipping them on and modeling immediately.
Oh’s and ah’s echo before his friends inflate his ego,
“Damn, you sure you aren’t a model?”
“You’re one step away.”
“He really is.”
He looks great and he knows it. And he carefully puts them back in their packaging before giving Jungkook a hug. They exchange conversation, and you can feel the latter’s smile as he laughs before sitting down.
Suddenly, you have the strongest intuition that you’re next. On Jimin’s turn. He’s getting out a very nice bag from behind a couch and your brain is firing off.
“Okay! The best gift is going to…”
You were right. He calls your name.
Smiling, you shakily stand as Jimin approaches, a twinkling look in those features glowing in incandescent lights.
Eyes on you. Many eyes.
A little overwhelmed, you thank him before sitting down. Because it’s much easier to do this while on a solid, structured surface.
“Hope you like it.”
“I’m sure I will.”
Best gift? What could Jimin possibly mean by—
Your scream shoots out as you clamp the bag shut because no fucking way you saw what you just saw in there.
Jimin’s laughing his ass off but it’s not funny.
“Jimin, what the fuck!” Now you know how Shiv felt and he is absolutely valid for his reaction. “I can’t accept this.”
People are concerned around you, and you quickly think they may have the wrong idea.
“What did he get?”
“What’s in there?”
Quelling some thoughts, you explain, “It’s a box.”
“Okay?”
You just gotta say it. They’re all gonna know as soon as you take it out anyway. So you breathe out,
“…It’s Dior.”
It’s the loudest it’s been all night, even though your friends are completely speechless. All the guys are up in arms and Jia’s scream for penalty can be heard through the chaos,
“What!”
“Where’s my Dior?”
“What the fuck?”
“Jimin…”
“Okay, that is way over limit! That’s cheating!”
“Penalty!”
Jimin’s sneaky smile as he turns around doesn’t help, “You know I get everything for less.”
“So?”
“Still, what the hell, man!”
You know Jimin works there. You do. But this is still making your limbs jelly and you can’t even speak.
There’s no way Dior is passed around at every gift exchange.
“You deserve it. For dealing with him.” He looks at your brother, but the look in his eyes is too sparkly to be completely truthful. Does he mean Yoongi? Or is he being serious?
Of course, your sibling throws out a droning, “Wow.”
After lots of shaky unboxing, you reveal a stunning bracelet, your friends bending down around you to gawk at how brilliant it is. Dancing in your fingers, this piece shimmers and gleams, and every single person is quiet.
Guilt. You feel guilt.
And you can’t even look at the reason why.
“Whatever you’re feeling, don’t. It’s okay.”
You’re tearing up because it’s way too nice. Which proves worse because you also feel bad for crying for the sole fact that Yoongi’s watching. You don’t want him to get the wrong idea.
You get up to hug him. “I… This is really nice, Jimin. Thank you.”
“Stop by the store sometime,” he offers with a smile. “Maybe I can slip more in your purse.”
“Easy,” your brother eyes him.
“So are we all getting fancy gifts or what?”
“Nope! Ran out of my discount, sorry.”
“Wow.”
When you finally glance around, everyone’s either a mix of shock and awe, visibly confused, or just jealous and wondering what the hell just happened.
Meanwhile.
Yoongi straight up looks like he’s holding his tongue.
And you suddenly feel really bad.
Hopefully giving him his gift will make up for what just happened. Even though you’re going after the hardest hitter of the damn night, this one’s special.
But who are you kidding? People are definitely gonna talk in private about Jimin’s little gift.
So now you have to try and mend this while acting like Yoongi’s just your brother’s friend. Cool. Awesome.
“So...”
Just try your goddamned best.
“Yoongi is mine.”
…Wait.
Your secret looks your way immediately while everyone snaps their heads to him.
What the fuck did you say?
Wait wait wait wait what did you fucking say?
Flapping your arms, you reach for words while everyone starts teasing, “Oh, god. I mean—I have Yoongi—I mean, wow. Hold on.”
Fucking fuck fuck, he’s grinning.
Thank the lord above for someone cheekily asking,
“First time at a gift exchange?”
You look away from the laughs while trying to compose your grin of embarrassment. Get it the fuck together, this is peak time to get it right.
“God. Okay.” You look down at your bag. All of its carefully folded and primped paper, the delicate folding inside. “For the gift exchange,” you clarify with a forced firm tone, “I got Yoongi.”
You feel Dom try her damned best to hide her laugh. And you know for damn sure Jimin and Taehyung are thoroughly amused right now.
All the oh’s sounding off in the living room are already enough to set your ears smoking. Your brother’s voice can be heard, but you know that’s for a specific reason.
Everything had to be carefully calculated, after all.
You walk up to him, and you cannot—absolutely cannot—look too long at the way he’s looking up at you. Him sitting in any capacity is enough to drive you up a wall, but now? When he looks so freshly fitted and prepping to tease you about all this later? You can barely think straight.
“I don’t think I can beat Jimin’s gift,” you sigh to his curious eyes. “But it’s a little too late to change.”
His smile turns so soft. He shouldn’t be the one comforting you right now when you probably broke a little of his heart. “It’s all good.”
Keep going.
Cleaning your clogged throat, you brave the crowd and breathe before starting again, “Anyway. This is kinda from both of us, but I picked it because I have better taste.”
“Hey, what the hell?”
Ignoring your brother’s protest, you watch as Yoongi softly opens the gift before pulling out a basketball jersey.
Of his favorite player.
“Holy shit.”
Shouts start erupting behind your back as you laugh, your sneaky gift joining the rest of them.
“Hello? That’s way too much!”
“That’s over the limit for sure.”
You wave your hands frantically among their teasing arguments, and your brother chimes in on your side. “I didn’t know what to get!”
“So you got a real jersey?”
“Relax, y’all. It’s from both of us.”
“Wait, which one’s Lillard again?”
“Damian,” Yoongi softly says in awe. “How’d you know?”
You can only blink, smiling faltering by the slightest amount.
Fuck, he’s gonna be cheeky right now? Knowing you know and exactly how you know? Cuddled up with him in his bed as he shows you highlight reels and tells you the guy’s whole story and that he happens to be a rapper, too?
Looking back towards your brother, you explain, “Well... He gave me a list. And I just picked off vibes.”
Yoongi’s eyes sparkle so much when he grins. “Good choice,” he compliments with creased eyes. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome!” You say back with a little too high of a pitch. “But tell him he still owes you a gift. This doesn’t count for him.”
“Uhh, it sure as fuck does!”
Yoongi breaks eye contact to shout behind you, “Didn’t you already tell me you got me something?”
“Yeah, it was that!”
“What a lie,” Yoongi says through a smile.
“Yeah, I did,” your brother surrenders. “The shoes are in my bag. Okay, next!”
Hilariously, two pairs of people end up getting each other. Yuri’s older sister Jia got Seokjin, who also drew her name—to the slight angst of your brother, you imagine.
And Hoseok ends up getting Namjoon. Which turns out being twice as funny because they both got each other the same pair of earphones. You can’t breathe with how hard you cackle with everyone, and your heart skips when you catch a glimpse of Yoongi’s eyes across the room.
By the end of the exchange, everyone’s bellies and cheeks sting from laughter, and every eye in sight has twinkles embedded inside.
Throughout the night, everyone starts branching off into different groups. You and your friends talk in the kitchen, and both in and out of the house, there’s groups of games and conversations.
The holiday decorations everywhere shine bright. Enveloped in the music, you keep looking at the lights, feeling happy but a little bittersweet.
You really wanna set the record straight with Yoongi. You had no damn clue that Jimin was gonna give something like that, much less in front of everyone.
The fact that you haven’t been in the same room for a bit makes it worse. What could he be thinking right now? You can’t tell because he’s nowhere in sight.
Screw it. You’re gonna at least text him. There’s no way you can survive the night if you’re gonna plague your own head without checking in with him.
Fishing out your phone, you sidestep away for a second to type something quick.
You [10:38pm]: i know it’s not dior.. but hope you like your gift :’))
Yoongi [10:38pm]: You know I do. It’s perfect, doll.
Well. He texted back super quick.
Maybe he’s really okay? Maybe he and Jimin already talked it through?
Then again.. Yoongi didn’t look happy at all during the big reveal. To the point where he was actively showing emotions you rarely get to see.
But if he says he likes his gift, that’s a good sign.
You [10:42pm]: i can’t believe jimin did that
Yoongi [10:42pm]: That was bold.
You [10:42pm]: seriously!!!
Hmm. So he didn’t know. That’s even more surprising than him knowing, now that you think about it.
You’re called over to get another round of food, and you turn down the initial invite but stay around as they get more to eat.
When you see a tray that smells way too good, you do break and get a piece anyways.
“Yeah, those are amazing,” Yuri chirps. “Shiv made those.”
“Really?” Dom grabs a couple pieces. “Lemme try these then.”
“You’re gonna want more.”
As you find a place outside to eat, you stand next to the heater while conversing with Taehyung. It’s adorable how you can tell how excited he is about his gift, turning it in his hand before pocketing the leather again.
“It’s so nice,” you compliment.
“He knows how to pick, I guess,” Tae smiles, looking at you and making you shy. Because hello? There’s no way he’s gonna be bringing that up tonight.
When you silently mouth for him to shut up, he grins like a madman. Glancing down at your hands, he suddenly asks, “Are you gonna put that down?”
“No,” you say with a tiny pang of guilt. “Afraid not.”
“Mm.”
Your phone buzzes again, and you’re thankful for the interruption.
Yoongi [11:09pm]: Guess I have to do better😔
Instantly, you take that gratefulness back.
You [11:09pm]: NO!! you don’t have to worry about me at all
Yoongi [11:10pm]: I can’t lose to you
You [11:10pm]: trust me, i just…
You think about sending the other text or not. But you do anyway.
Taehyung sees the look in your faraway face, but doesn’t comment as you peer down again.
You [11:11pm]: i just wanna see you happy
That’s all you want. If he’s happy, you’re happy. So it sucks to have part of the night come as quite the shock.
Interestingly enough, though.. Someone else in the house should also be pretty upset about your gift, and you haven’t seen Jimin cornered by him yet.
Unless your brother is just deciding to be courteous and beat his ass after everyone leaves.
Yoongi [11:13pm]: Then come over here
You’re not gonna argue with that.
So when your friends finish their plates, you suggest you all head into the garage. It’s already rowdy before you open the door, so the sounds get booming loud when you all enter.
Looks like everyone is blowing their money on other things tonight, too. The gifts were the nice part of the party; now everyone is fiending to take everyone’s cash.
“Damn, Yoongi’s clearing me out.”
“Told you not to go all in.”
“He did.”
As the cold weather rolls in, you watch as the games go on, with heaters humming with energy and your brother’s friends radiating competition.
No wonder Yoongi wanted you in here.
He’s on a damn roll.
As everyone groans after another win, Namjoon and your brother are in tatters,
“Yoong, what the fuck!”
“You hiding cards in those sleeves?”
“I told you!” Yoongi boasts, “Don’t get too cocky.”
“Says him.”
“Cocky, my ass.”
When you laugh, you earn a tiny glimpse of his eyes. But as his vision falls to your hands, you’re quick to look away, out into the night to look at all the lights instead.
Shit.
After some time passes, you find yourself alone on a balcony. Yet again. Cold wind blows through your coat, chilling you but making you feel alive. Too alive in this moment. Too aware.
The holidays aren’t so bad this time around. But you do need to set this one thing straight before things go a little sideways with Yoongi.
If he’s upset, you don’t want him to be. Even if he doesn’t say it, you want him to know you’re considering his feelings. There’s some things you just can’t control.
So you wait for Jimin, telling him earlier to meet you up here for the best chance at privacy.
When you hear the door opening, you see him come through, hair lifting in the breeze and his lips in a slight curve.
Get right to it. “Jimin, I—”
“Isn’t it so nice tonight?”
Stopping, you settle into a smile, watching him walk up to stand next to you before you both look into the night. The neighborhood glows beneath your feet, and everyone in the backyard mingles while puffs of air leave their lips.
“It really is,” you say with a smile, clutching the gift bag in cold fingers. Because you haven’t let go of it ever since it was given to you—it’s way too expensive. You’ve been guarding it all night.
Which is why you need to hand it back to the one who gave it to you. “We haven’t done something like this before, so.. It’s a nice change of pace.”
Jimin turns before realizing something. “Oh. I meant the weather.”
Embarrassed, you let out a laugh while his eyes crease. “Ah. That, too.”
“Got deep real fast.”
“Jimin!”
Both of you puff out laughter as you look down, just in time to see someone gazing right up at you. Someone that makes your heart squeeze on sight.
Oh, shit. Is he gonna get the wrong idea again?
You need to do this quick. Yoongi can’t be let down more than once tonight.
Sighing, you start to hold up the bag again. “Thank you—”
“He’s lucky you came around when you did.”
“Huh?”
Jimin leans on the railing before eyeing you with a smile. “You don’t even know, do you.”
“I don’t…” When you look below, Yoongi’s not looking anymore. And you panic. “Jimin, thank you. But I seriously can’t take this.”
Why does he look so calm? Why does he keep acting like this isn’t a big deal? “You can.”
“No, really. I—”
“I may have gone too far this time.”
Your eyes still as you breathe out a confused, “...What?”
Jimin’s face is dusted with peach in the cold, and you get a good view of his jawline as he peers down below with a regretful curve. “I kinda tricked him,” he admits. “Into picking your gift for the exchange.”
The shock you feel prevents you from even blinking. How the hell can this get even more overwhelming? “What do you mean?”
“I wasn’t lying when I said I got some good discounts.” Jimin turns around to lean against the railing. “So I thought it would be fun to rope him into getting you something.”
When he laughs to the chilly night sky, you don’t join him—the shock is preventing you from doing anything.
“Didn’t think he’d pick a whole bracelet, though. Made for one hell of a gift exchange pick.” He looks at you at a tilt. “You like it, right?”
Even if Yoongi was the one to pick out the jewelry, Jimin still had to purchase the damn thing. And even with his discount, it’s still expensive as hell. It has to be. You haven’t let go of the bag once because you don’t want to lose it. “But you still had to pay,” you blurt out. “I’ll find a way to pay you back if you aren’t gonna take it.”
“I didn’t pay for it, either.”
Your heart stops.
Full on halts.
When he turns his head, he looks toward the sky in thought. “Well, I did secretly pay the exchange limit. But..” He straightens before staring back at your absolute silence, dropping the biggest surprise of the whole night,
“Yoongi paid the difference.”
The sudden sob that leaves your throat startles him immediately, and he rushes forward to put hands on your shoulders. “Hey, hey, you okay?”
“Yeah, I just—”
The sound of a door slides open, and you turn to see your favorite, favorite, favorite person walking through. You must look like a wreck but you don’t care, don’t care, don’t care.
“I’ll leave you both to it then,” Jimin says to your watery eyes before squeezing, heading out to give you both the quiet space you need.
But Yoongi clutches his arm as he walks by, and you hold your breath as he stares him in the eye, voice burning with a steady glow,
“Don’t pull that shit again.”
“I know,” Jimin agrees without pause. “I owe you one.”
“No one comes up here then.” Yoongi releases him slow. “Until I come back down.”
The host of the night shares a quick hand clutch before assuring, “You got it.”
Bag clutched tight in your hands, you watch in wonder as Yoongi approaches you with a quiet determination. His presence alone makes your heart beat warm and soft, but you cannot stop the tears from flowing down your cheeks.
All you can ask as he gets close is a wondrous, “Why..?”
“He’s a very persuasive salesman.” When you wipe your eyes, he helps with a little look of tenderness. Though there’s still some frustration evident in his features. “But I didn’t know it would be for tonight.”
“Oh, shit,” you sigh. “Why did he do that?”
“I’m not sure.” Yoongi holds your chin, rubbing your frosty cheek with a handworking thumb. “Taehyung didn’t know he’d do it, either.”
“Tae knew, too?”
“Yeah. He thought I had it, not Chim.” He sighs to the side, hair lifting slightly in the breeze. “I almost stood up when you screamed.”
Your heart shrugs off some chill. “Really?”
Yoongi nods before looking up with scrunched brows. “It took all of me to keep my ass down. Honestly, I’m still pissed the fuck off.”
You believe that. One hundred percent, you believe that. Because you’ve never seen him talk to Jimin like that before tonight.
Reaching to cradle one of his cheeks, you feel how cold he is before whispering to soothe, “Tell me how you wanted it to go.”
When Yoongi looks at you, your lips curve into a small smile. Peppered with a bit of your tears and willingness to make him feel better.
He softly grips your hand on his face before turning to kiss your fingers. Voice low, he reveals, “I was gonna take you straight to dinner. After you got off work one day.” Another set of kisses makes your fingers both hot and cold. “Then I would’ve faked needing something from the studio. And you would’ve gotten it there.”
“Oh…” You blink as your vision blurs. “That’s…”
“Among other things.”
At his suggestive look, you playfully pat his jacket. But your heart starts leaking from your eyes.
Because you just want it all to be out already. Just everything. Everything, everything, everything, you’re so tired of keeping it under wraps.
“What’s wrong, doll.”
“Nothing,” you sob. “I’m just… I didn’t know, and… This is a lot.”
You’re overflowing with emotions. From all the experiences you’ve had tonight to this very moment, everything has been wonderful and magical and there’s nothing quite like this feeling. But you’re also so embarrassed because he definitely brought out much bigger guns than you did.
Sniffling into his jacket, you whisper, “Thank you… You got me something timeless. This is so much cooler than my gift.”
“No! Yours is great, are you kidding me?”
“It’s a jersey… That’s much less cool.”
“Mm... You also called me yours.” When you freeze completely, Yoongi's shoulders bob with his pride. “Gotta say, that was the highlight of the night."
“Oh, shut up!" When you groan into his clothes, you feel him laughing through his chest. And it's one of your favorite feelings in the world.
Shoulders slumped, you heavily yearn,
“I want it all out now. Everything.” You squeeze him closer. Closer, closer, closer. “I want everyone to know it was from you.”
Yoongi doesn’t say anything, though you do feel his heart beat a little faster. When he finally answers, you close your eyes. “I know I said this last time, but.. Next year. For sure.”
“Can we decorate, too?”
Yoongi looks into your starry eyes. “You wanna?” When your nod is quick, he laughs. “Guess I don’t have a real choice then, huh?”
“Nu uh.” You squeal as he hauls you into a full kiss, squeezing you in his arms and more tears out of your eyes. “Wait!”
When he tilts his head, you grin at his adorable quirk. “Let’s do it anyway.”
“Huh?”
Holding up the bag, you cheekily suggest, “Everything you said. Let’s do it.” Biting your lip and feeling the chill on your ears, you finish, “There’s a new place I wanna try with you anyways.”
Yoongi just stares, smile unsure but huffing amusement from his nose. “You sure?”
“Duh! And I’ll act even more surprised, just for you.”
Your giggling is purely born from excitement. Because you can’t wait to take him somewhere you know he’ll enjoy, too. And you get to see the studio? It’s gonna be a fantastic—
You’re brought into a tight hug before your thoughts finish. The bag between you crumples a tad, but you’re more focused on the way your head is moved for a soul-tying kiss.
Warmth and gold and sparkles burst from your chest as you’re completely taken by Yoongi’s lips, and you start to feel your house inside change. It’s festive. It’s decorated. It’s made just for you and him.
You've never been one for this season. But getting to spend it with Yoongi two years in a row? It's becoming one of your favorite times of the year.
“I just…” he murmurs to your features before gripping you close. “Thanks, babe.”
“Thank you,” you whisper into his handsome features. “Once you give it to me for real, I’m gonna wear it everywhere.”
“Please do. Get my money’s worth.”
When you both laugh, your affection leaves in puffs of white. And you give him a more tender kiss than the first.
You feel so at home it hurts. But it hurts because your heart is so full you can’t fit it all. All the love for everyone that fills that hole in your life that you and your brother have had for years.
You’re gonna tell him one day. And it’s gonna rip you apart.
But you hope everything will be okay. This time next year, all of you will be okay. More than okay.
When you lean in close, you whisper something you’ve never really said to anyone. But you’re gonna try to start, even if you aren’t quite familiar with it yet. It’s a good year to start, start, start.
“Happy holidays, Yoongi.”
His lips spread slow before giving one more kiss to your chilly nose. And every anxious feeling floats away in the frosty breeze.
“Happy holidays, doll.”
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fin. :)
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so... how did it go! | join the server! | join the taglist!
a/n: happy holidays, merry christmas, happy new year to everyone that celebrates! just wanted to get this one out for the ones needing a little bit of cheer around this time. we learn quite a bit about some of the crew's backstories and where they work now, huh. is this a pocket universe, too? who really knows! but it all flew out of my fingers as soon as we got the suggestion, so thank you again to that anon message! a/n 2: thank you to everyone that's stuck with me and 3tan this year. it's been a rough one, but i also wanted to post this one to let you all know i'm still here. 3tan will forever stay with me, and i have not ever forgotten it. not one day goes by where i don't think about it, or y'all, or them. trust me. also, stay on the lookout for some physical copy interest checks! we are getting closer and closer to 3tan copies being A Real Thing! ++ feedback box: ⇥ of course, any reblogs/comments/messages are appreciated! ⇥ for the ones that are too shy to reblog with a review, comment on this, or send a message, i went ahead and made another anonymous form where you can send in what you think! ⇥ no emails collected, no need to put in a username. it’s literally just a comment dropbox :D feedback can be as short/sweet or as long as you’d like! ⇥ here! ++ more links: ⇥ masterlist ⇥ three tangerines masterlist
#hehehehe surprise and happy holidays!#bts fic#bts fanfic#yoongi fic#3tanholiday#yoongi fluff#yoongi x reader#yoongi x you#ryenwrites#*ryenfictalk#*latest#bts imagines#bts reactions
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Recent things.. mostly just writing screenshots lol
#There's a water problem in the apartment so thats been taking most of my attention lol.. the way maintenance happens here is just#this big long vague wait with no clear communication. You just send in a request to the apartment building and then you might hear from the#any weekday from 8am - 4pm any time after that. Sometimes it's quick but sometimes its like days before you hear anything. So then#you just have to be operating under the assumption that at any time during working hours you might get a call or a knock at the door#Like if you were expecting company at any time for a week straight ghjhj.. ANYWAY.. I've been working on making a little discord#server thing for the game maybe for playtesters to communicate in initially i guess but then also after it's out or... something like that.#no idea how all of that works. but you hear about people doing it. or something... Still not entirely sold on the idea since I'm not really#a big user of discord format speaking (like little chats and stuff) but.. again idk.. seems like.. common.. for things...(< socially odd#hermit fumbling through trying to imitate what '''normal''' people do/enjoy/desire lol..). Since I think my biggest issue is I am very bad#at socializing and thus marketing since a lot of that is social. The type to just google ''what do people do about games once they've#made them'' and just go after whatever the top 10 things apparently are hjbjhbjh... But like I said. still unsure it will be utilized. it#all feels very awkward to me. then again most things do. But that's what the ''overall progress'' screenshot is from. the little channel#where I've been posting updates to myself lol. Also ''coding'' in that being used very lightly consdering it's ren'py and I'm only using#the very bare bones most basic functionality of it lol. Extremely intense highly daunting master level coding such as ''if x then y''. gbjh#slacked on writing a lot due to the evil maintenance and such things... and just general... appointments... events... aughhhhhh#I think it's Goose Time here or something because nearly every day I hear big V shaped rows of geese flying by like multiple#times a day and they're so pretty and neat to watch. They've really inspired me somehow. Today it was rainy and gray skied and high winds#and cold (some of my favorite most beautiful weather) and I went out to check the mail and like 6 or 7 rows of geese fluttered#by in the air. I felt like that meme image of that guy that looks kind of weird (william dafoe??) and its like black and white and#he's looking up at something almost teary eyed wide eyed in awe.. The goose... those are my goose.. the universe sent those gooses just#for me and the high speed winds blowing my coat open and chilling my face... a tender platonic kiss from the world is often delivered#by way of chilly weather and bird formations.. peace and love on planet earth truly..#OH and of course.. boy with boy!!!! shout out to those little mcdonalds toy animal plushies from like 2006 or something. I found the#gray cat one and was like.. hrmm.. I have one of those as well (a real life gray cat). surely they're friends now.
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With the confirmation of The Acolyte not getting a second season, I can't say I'm surprised, the numbers for that show were really bad given what its budgets was, like I kept an eye on The Acolyte's numbers and they were really, really down across the board (Ahsoka's numbers aren't super great either but that's getting its second season because it's Filoni's pet show, I suspect), like set aside all the other complicated stuff, whether it was good or bad, how much of the fandom's reaction was pretty heinous and racist, it just was not getting the numbers it needed and it's making me wonder about how all of these shows are not doing well. Mando is doing all right, OWK did all right, Andor's doing okay, but none of these shows are setting anything on fire anymore (ratings-wise, that is), what would it take to create something that takes off again?
I strongly suspect that The Mandalorian only took off because of Favreau, who really does know how to make something really good and fun in the beginning. Filoni gets a lot of credit for that show, but I'd be willing to put ten dollars on the table that Favreau was driving the vast majority of the success of that series. And that makes me wonder about the future of these shows, because I don't think Filoni is strong enough to really carry a show on his own, most of his best work is when he has a strong partner actively working with him or when he was working under Lucas.
And the creators they bring in to create these shows aren't setting anything on fire, either. Yeah, the sequels made a billion dollars for each movie, but I think it's pretty telling that we're not getting comics or books or games about those characters anymore, the way we did for the prequels characters for more than a decade after they came out. Yeah, Tony Gilroy and Deborah Chow had shows that did solidly well, but they're not anything that Star Wars can build future content off of, they're already backstories for other movies themselves. And I don't think Skeleton Crew is going to light anything on fire, either.
Lucasfilm just doesn't seem to know what to do with Star Wars TV and movies. They had some really good early success with their projects, but almost everything ultimately fizzled out after a few years or ended really badly, and it feels like the only thing that's really hitting with audiences are more Clone Wars-era content and The High Republic novels and maybe still The Mandalorian.
Honestly, if I were Lucasfilm, I'd cut out the live action shows and go back to animation and think long and hard about setting up a new movie series. I think, with the right creative team (and not just who they think is a big name to write/direct), they could have a great trilogy with The Old Republic era stuff, because they have got to expand beyond the PT/OT and the Skywalkers, especially since the sequels put a bad taste in a lot of people's mouths about how Luke, Leia, and Han's stories ended.
(I mean, in my ideal world, we'd get an animated series set in between TPM and AOTC or set like 30 years pre-TPM and getting to see the backstories for characters like Mace and Plo and Shaak and Luminara and Yarael, but I'm not holding my breath on that one.)
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