#Like more than double compared to the last few years

[thoughtvoid]

I spent so much money during the holiday season (half on myself, half on family), but. While I am slightly ashamed (being unemployed most of the year, and spending pretty much everything I was getting while working holiday immediately), my satisfaction with what I've been getting feels pretty good.

Like. I had a small bit of reasoning in that I was only guaranteed to be working holiday, so I wanted to heavily use my worker's discount (retail) while also taking advantage of good holiday sales. Got a healthy mix of 'things I will need in the future/improve my quality of life immediately' and 'I don't need this but I like it so now it's mine'. I will probably lose most of my shame of spending money in a month or so, when cards are paid off and I start actually accumulating money again, since I was kept on after holiday. I'd like to be able to stop looking at my balance and worrying about maintaining a certain amount and just vibe again.

[kiss-inthekitchen]

pairing: spencer reid x reader

set sometime in early s2; you get stuck sharing a room with your favorite boy genius who absolutely cannot know that you have feelings for him. and also, there’s only one bed. fluff, f!reader (i think there's only two usages of gender markers)

word count: 4.7k

notes: this is a rework of a very old fic i used to have up on ao3. i'm thinking i'll do more of these, i've got a few spencer fics in the vault and it was fun to rework this and see how my style has changed :)

You shivered against the cold desert air. Twirling a keyring around your finger, you headed for the door marked 3. You were exhausted from the day and so, so ready to collapse into bed as soon as you got inside your room. 

You turned the key in the lock while Spencer waited behind you. It was late, and you and the team had pulled into a motel for the night, having been dragged out to a tiny rural town by the unsub after days of tracking him through surrounding areas. He’d been apprehended, finally, and handed over to local police around midnight. You all had decided it best to spend the night before driving back into town in the morning for take off. 

So here you were, at one of those single story motels that still used actual keys instead of key cards. Given the time of night, you knew vacancies would be scarce, so you’d already expected to have to double up on rooms. Gideon had stayed behind at Quantico, leaving Hotch and Morgan in one room and JJ and Prentiss in another, with you and Spencer sharing the last room. You’d hung back while JJ got everything figured out with the concierge (who was just a bored looking kid posted at the desk), and then she’d passed you your key with its little keyring attachment listing the room number and you all bade each other goodnight.

You’d been on the team nearly a year already, but you were still the rookie compared to everyone else. Even Spence had two years on you. But seeing as you two were the youngest, and the least inclined toward the more physical parts of your job– the chasing, tackling, firing your weapon parts– you were paired off with him more often than not. 

You weren’t complaining. You’d come to know Spencer pretty well, and you didn’t feel much apprehension at the thought of sharing a room with him for one night. 

That is, until you opened the door. 

“Oh,” you said involuntarily.  

"There's only one bed,” Spencer said. 

“Sure looks that way.” 

"At least it's a queen?" 

There was a brief pause before you both started speaking at the same time. 

"Maybe we can go back to the concierge–" Spencer began. 

"I mean, I guess I don't really–" 

"–although, JJ did say we got the last–" 

"–mind as long as you–" 

You cut yourself off this time. It’s not like there was another good option, unless one of you wanted to sleep in the car. "This is fine?" it came out as a question rather than a statement. 

"I think so? I wouldn't want to– to make you uncomfortable or anything."

"This is fine," you repeated, more sure of yourself this time. “And you don’t make me uncomfortable.”  

It was only kind of a lie. You trusted Spencer with your life, of course. But he also made you nervous. He was sweet, kind, always seeming genuinely interested in anything you had to say. And of course, anyone could see that he was attractive. You were developing feelings for him, and in a job where your coworkers and your crush himself were all adept at reading people, it really wasn’t a good position for you to be in. You just hoped Spencer was as oblivious with women as Derek made him out to be. 

"We should get out of the doorway," Spencer suggested, and you realized you'd been standing in the threshold this whole time.

"Right."

The two of you walked in, Spencer closing and locking the door behind you. It was a modest room in a tiny town; your standard ugly-patterned, faded bedspread draped over the queen bed in the center, a window looking out into the parking lot, and a dresser that didn’t even have a TV on top of it. You headed straight for the bed, sitting on the edge and removing your shoes while Spencer stood by with his hands in his pockets.

"You know, if it's a problem I can sleep on the cou– uh, the chair," Spencer offered, looking back mid-sentence and realizing that the only additional furniture this motel offered was one rigid looking armchair by the window. 

"No, you're not doing that."

"What?" he asked, taken aback by the quickness of your response.

"You're not sleeping in that chair. It looks horribly uncomfortable and I’m sure it’s never been cleaned, and I know how you’d feel about that.” 

Spencer grimaced, not having thought about that particular detail. “Yeah, but, I mean… I’d do it for you.” 

God, why did he have to say stuff like that? Like you were something special. And why now, when you were stuck in the same room with him until morning? It probably didn’t even mean the same thing to him as it meant to you. He was one of the most caring people you’d ever met. He’d probably say that to any one of you on the team. 

Or maybe sleeping in a chair meant nothing to him at all. Maybe he actually didn’t want to share the bed with you and that’s why he was trying so hard to avoid it. 

Ugh. You just wanted this day to be over. It was late, the case had been a week long, and now you were probably in for a fun night of overthinking and second guessing when you’d been expecting silence and easy, dreamless sleep. 

Okay, maybe that last part was never really an option, but still. 

“Look,” you sighed, “I know this isn't an ideal situation but there's a perfectly good bed here, so let’s just share it. If you’re okay with that. It's just one night and tomorrow we'll be back home and nobody has to know about it."

You had to fight from squeezing your eyes shut in regret. You wished that had come out differently. You chanced a look at Spencer, realizing that you’d been staring down at the faded carpet pattern while you spoke. 

The look on his face was one you hadn’t seen before, and you almost couldn't place it. He seemed sort of disappointed. Disappointed that he had to share a bed with you? Or that you'd made it sound like you didn't want to share a bed with him? Nope, you could not go down that road tonight. You shook your head once as if it would clear the thoughts from your tired mind. 

“I’m okay with that," he said, casually enough that you could almost convince yourself that you’d just imagined the look on his face before. "So, do you want the shower first, or...?" Spencer asked.

"No, I can wait, you go ahead," you said. You desperately needed the moment to yourself anyway.  

You started rifling through your bag for pajamas, toiletries, and your charger as an excuse to look busy while Spencer made his way into the bathroom with his things. As soon as the door closed behind him, you flopped back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling as if it might hold all the answers. 

Spencer couldn't know about your feelings. For one thing, you were pretty sure there was a rule against dating your colleagues in the BAU. If not, there probably should be. You were such a close knit team, and if anything went wrong… you couldn’t imagine how difficult that would be. But then, the evil and uncooperative part of you also couldn’t help but think that things might go right. 

From the beginning of your time at the BAU, you’d been drawn to Spencer. It just kind of made sense. You’d gotten through school at an accelerated pace– though not as quickly as him, the man was on another fucking level when it came to academics– and you were one of the only people who found his fact dropping actually interesting, often asking him follow up questions. He’d looked adorably shocked the first few times you’d done that. 

He listened intently to your passionate rants about your favorite films and tv shows, even though he hadn’t seen any of them. When the two of you had discovered a shared interest in mythology and folklore, Hotch nearly had to separate you so you would actually get some work done. It was like you were a kid in school again, and you might’ve been embarrassed if you didn’t find it so funny, if you weren’t so giddy at the idea of a friendship that could make you feel like a kid again. 

Spencer understood you in a way that other people didn’t, laughing at your jokes even when they didn’t land for anybody else. When people interrupted or spoke over you, he always paid attention, and in situations where you were trying to add details to the profile he’d bring the conversation back around to you. 

Throughout your life you’d learned– through painstaking trial and error– to fit in pretty well in most any group you found yourself in, but you’d always considered yourself to be a little weird. A little too different. But when you were with Spencer, you felt like you didn’t have to try so hard. You could both be a little different, together. 

Spencer opened the bathroom door then, startling you. You’d been so lost in thought you hadn’t even noticed the water turn off. You looked over to see him wearing a loose white t-shirt and pajama pants, his hair still damp. And now you knew what Spencer looked like fresh out of a shower. And of course it was endearing as hell. 

“If that’s how you’re planning to sleep,” Spencer began, referencing how you were laid out in the dead center of the bed, your arms fully outstretched and hands hanging off the mattress, “then I think we might have a slight problem after all.”  

You walked out of the bathroom a short while later, dressed in your usual sleepwear of shorts and an oversized shirt. You’d put your hair up in a bun to protect it while you showered, and now it hung loose around your shoulders. You simultaneously wished your outfit was cuter and uglier; knowing your giant t-shirt wasn’t flattering your figure while also feeling like you had too much skin exposed. Not that it mattered. You were just going to get some sleep and then wake up in the morning and head home. Everything would be back to normal. 

Spencer’s in bed already. He’d turned off the big light while you were showering, the lamps on either side of the bed casting him in a softer, warmer glow. He looked up from his book to find you standing there, and the soft, familiar look in his big brown eyes had you rooted to the spot. 

“Hey,” he said softly, patting the space next to him in invitation. 

You conceded, finding your legs again and sliding into bed beside him. “Hey.” 

He fidgeted with the pages of his book, ultimately shutting it closed on his index finger to mark the page. “So, uh, are we okay?” 

“Yeah, of course,” you answered genuinely, feeling bad that your internal struggle had manifested in a way that worried him. 

“Okay, cool,” he said. He paused long enough to let you explain if you wanted to, another invitation. You knew he wouldn’t push it if you didn’t offer something up. You wanted to give him an explanation, but you couldn’t bring yourself to. 

“Sorry,” you managed. 

“For what?” 

“I don’t know… acting weird, I guess. It’s just been a long day.” 

“Oh, well, you don’t need to be sorry about that. You’re always weird.” 

Your mouth dropped open as you looked at him. “Look who’s fucking talking,” you scoffed. Some of the tension dropped from your shoulders, glad he hadn’t questioned you further. 

“Language, please,” he held up a hand to stop you. “I’m delicate.” 

“Wha–?” you let out a surprised little laugh. “You’re an idiot!” 

“Yeah okay, tell that to my I–.” 

“Oh, my IQ of 187,” you finished for him, rolling your eyes. Even that was full of endearment. “God, you are so annoying.” 

“Hm. Y’know, this might be a long night for you. I’d hate to keep you up with my annoyingness.” 

“I feel like you could’ve come up with a better word than annoyingness, Mr. 187,” you tilted your head where it rested against the headboard, looking up at him. 

“Oh, she’s being a smartass now!” he split into a surprised grin, and you could swear your heart skipped a beat. 

“You just said ass.” 

“Wow. How quickly you’ve corrupted me.” 

“Right, of course. It’s my fault.” 

“I knew you’d agree.” 

“Shut the fuck up,” you laughed. 

Things felt a little bit more normal after that, joking around with Spencer like you normally did made the rest of the night feel less daunting. 

Shortly after that, the two of you agreed that you should get some sleep, each reaching over to turn out the light on your respective sides of the bed. 

You let yourself sink into your pillow, the exhaustion you had been feeling giving way to a hyper awareness of Reid’s body next to you. You were kept awake, completely overcome by the foot of space between you and Spencer; the consequences of crossing that space, the way it might feel, the curiosity over whether he was laying awake too, thinking the same thoughts as you. Even with that foot of space separating you, you could feel his body heat. You longed to move closer to him, to touch him, to let his warmth seep into you and lull you to sleep. 

But you didn’t, and you wouldn’t, because this was just an unfortunate booking mishap. It didn’t mean anything. Tomorrow it would be over, and you could more easily go back to hiding your feelings from everyone else and yourself. 

Eventually, exhaustion won out. 

You woke what could’ve been a few minutes or a few hours later, the sky still dark. You couldn’t tell what exactly had woken you up, only the sense that you’d moved, almost like you’d fallen. But fallen from what? 

You blinked in the dark, the street lamps in the parking lot providing enough residual light to keep the room from being pitch black. 

Reid was sitting up. He must’ve bolted upright, you thought. Had that been what moved you? Were you lying on him?! 

“Hey, you okay?” 

“Sorry. Just a nightmare,” he said as if it was nothing. “Sorry to wake you.” 

“What was it about?” you ignored his apologies, sitting up as well. 

“I don't really even remember,” he breathed, almost like it was funny. “Just having a physiological reaction to whatever it was, I guess.” 

You had nightmares too, of course. You all did. You hated remembering them, but you also hated the times when you woke up in the dark, dazed and inexplicably scared. Without thinking, you reached for his hand. 

He turned to look at you then. “I really didn't mean to wake you,” he reiterated. 

“I figured,” you smiled slightly. You noticed his breathing was just a bit too fast. You rubbed your thumb over the back of his hand, leaning over to rest your weight against his side, your head on his shoulder. His nervous system would regulate itself quicker this way. 

“You were on my pillow, by the way.” 

“What?” you ask, your head jerking back from him. 

“I totally called it. You rolled right into the center of the bed in your sleep. Total bed hog.” 

“Hey!” you protested, pulling your hand back from his in embarrassment. So you had been lying on top of him. Or at least really close to him. His hand chased after yours, finding you again. 

“That wasn’t me complaining about it.” 

“Oh,” was all you could think to say back. 

It was quiet for a minute. You let your head fall back onto Spencer’s shoulder, but your heart raced in your chest. 

“Can I ask you something?” he questioned, his tone becoming more serious. 

“Oh– of course,” you answered, your brow creasing. 

“What did you mean when you said ‘it’s not ideal’ and ‘nobody has to know about it’?” 

“Wh– I– Spencer, come on.” 

He didn’t give you an out this time. Just waited for an answer. 

“I don’t even really know,” you sighed.  

“I believe you’re being partially truthful about that.” 

“Don’t profile me.” 

“I’m not. I just know you.” 

You sighed. “You know, sometimes I hate that stupid memory of yours.” 

“I don’t need an eidetic memory to remember that. It was a weird thing to say, and it happened like four hours ago.” 

“You’re guesstimating. And it wasn’t that weird.” 

“Maybe not, but the way you said it was. And you’re avoiding my question.” 

You continued to avoid it, biting down on your bottom lip. 

“And you stuttered when I brought it up.” 

“I told you to stop profiling me.” 

This time, he just hummed in response. 

“And so what if I stuttered?” 

“Stuttering is usually more my thing. A nervousness thing.” 

Maybe this was actually your nightmare. Maybe you’d wake up soon and none of this would’ve been real, and you wouldn’t have had to explain to Spencer that the reason you’d had an attitude was because the situation tonight had made it harder to hide your feelings from him. Big feelings that became a lot harder to ignore when he was this close to you, still holding your hand, the mix of scents from his detergent and deodorant clouding your judgment. Of all the embarrassing scenarios that you could’ve imagined playing out tonight, this was very high up on the list. 

“I said ‘it’s not ideal’ because it’s not, just by definition. We were supposed to get a double room and we didn’t. Not ideal. And I said no one has to find out because I can already see Morgan having a field day with it and I know the exact expression that’ll be on his face–” 

“The eyebrows,” he nodded, lips pursed. 

“And then everyone else will get in on it and I just figured…” you sighed. “I don’t know. I didn’t want to deal with that.” 

“That all makes total sense.” 

“Good,” you breathed. Too relieved. 

“Now tell me the rest of it.” 

“God, Spencer–” you huffed out, frustrated. He knew you too well. 

You wanted to run. Maybe you could go sleep in the car after all. And then ignore Spencer for the rest of the day, and then the year, and your life, and– 

“Don’t make me say it,” you breathed. This had to be a dream. 

“But there is something to be said?” he questioned, his tone hushed, almost reverent. 

It was just vague enough. You could pretend it was nothing. 

“Yes.” 

You felt like you’d just blown your life up with one word. 

Spencer took a deep breath, your body cresting and falling with the movement of it. 

“You make me feel better about being myself,” he confessed.  

You shut your eyes. You had a constricting feeling in your throat suddenly, and the awful realization that you might cry. 

He spoke again, because you couldn’t. “I haven’t always felt good about it, you know? And then you joined the team, and, well– you changed a lot of things for me. And you’re beautiful, obviously, and I was scared to mess up what we have, because it’s special, I think–” 

“It is.” 

“–and then you started freaking out when you saw the bed,” he was smiling now, you could hear it, “and I thought, maybe it wouldn’t be so crazy… maybe I could make you feel that way too.” 

“You do. Of course you do. I feel like I can be my full self with you. I don’t know that I’ve ever felt like that before.” 

Spencer laughed, a little delirious giggle, and squeezed your hand in his. You’d managed to avoid crying, thankfully, and you grinned along with him, looking down at your joined hands as you squeezed him back. 

Things seemed to still for a beat, the two of you sitting with this moment and letting it stretch out. You still couldn’t really believe this was happening. You might have to tell Spencer to pinch you. 

“So what does that mean for us now?” you asked. 

“Well, for right now at least, I think it just means that we can go back to sleep without overthinking things into oblivion.” 

“I was not–”

“Okay, this time I am profiling you, and you’re lying,” he cut you off, his smile still evident.  

“Oh, this was such a mistake.”

He continued like you hadn’t spoken, laughing a little as he went. “I could practically hear it. It’s like, you know when a computer is trying to use too much processing power and the fan starts whirring really loud? Like that but just like right next to me, like tangible—“  

“Okay! Thank you so much, I actually totally got it, you can stop now.” 

He laughed, and your cheeks warmed. 

“For the record, I meant we could both stop overthinking.” Then he shifted a little, facing you a bit more. With the hand that wasn’t holding yours, he brushed a strand of hair from your face, a fake pout on his lips. “Sorry I make you nervous.” 

You cackled at that, if it was possible to cackle in hushed tones. “Oh, I bet you are. Besides, I know you like me now, so you’ve lost that card.” 

“Are you certain of that?” 

“Certain that you like me or certain that you can’t make me nervous?” 

“The latter. I do like you, if that was unclear.” 

Your heart sped up, contradicting you as you answered, “Then I’m certain you can’t make me nervous.” 

He titled your face up to his then, using his index finger underneath your chin to make you look at him. “You’re an awful liar.” 

You just shrugged, watching triumphantly as Spencer’s gaze fell to your lips. “It’s been working out pretty well for me so far.” 

“I guess it has,” he murmured, closing the distance between you and finally kissing you. 

After so many months of imagining (and berating yourself for imagining) what Spencer’s lips might feel like on yours, you weren’t disappointed. 

For once you didn’t have to think at all, the chemistry between you and him drowning out everything else. His hand fell to your waist, and yours moved to the curve of his jaw, pulling him closer as his mouth moved against yours. Your teeth grazed his bottom lip and he gasped, and your skin felt like it was lit up from the inside. 

You pulled away to breathe, and to process, and to try and stop your head from swimming. You were rewarded with the awestruck look in Spencer’s eyes as he opened them again. 

“Okay, was it just me, or–” 

“That was crazy,” you breathed.

“Crazy,” he agreed. 

“Spence?” 

“Yeah?” 

“I don’t think we’re getting back to sleep tonight.” Your eyes widened at the implication of saying those words at that time. “Not, like, in the sex way, though,” you hurried to correct yourself. “I need like, 4-5 business days to process things first, and I– well, I just meant, like– you know?” 

Spencer was nodding at you even as his eyebrows pulled together in a frown. “Can I still kiss you during those 4-5 business days?” 

“Oh, yeah,” you said, sounding breathless. 

“Cool,” he agreed. “You seem really nervous, by the way.” 

“Well, you kissed me.” 

“I did.”  

“How were you not nervous?” you breathed. 

“Oh, I was. Your reaction is making me feel a whole lot better about it though.” 

You scoffed half-heartedly. “I do so much for you.” 

“You do,” he replied earnestly, letting go of your hand to wrap his arm around your shoulders as he pressed a kiss to your forehead. “We could lie back down, if you want. Like we were before I so rudely woke you up.” 

“Yeah, I’m super mad about that,” you joked. “Anyway, I was asleep for that, so you’ll have to show me what I was doing.” 

He seemed all too pleased to do so. “Okay, so you were basically like,” he leaned back against the pillows, pulling you down with him, moving his hand to the side of your head to guide you to the place where his shoulder met his chest, “Like that, and then your arm was over here,” he picked up your arm and guided it around his waist. 

“Oh god, that’s so embarrassing,” you said, realizing that he must’ve been awake when you’d done it. 

“Yeah, I know. Really terrible time for me.” 

“I can imagine. I can scoot back over to my side of the bed, just say the word.” 

“Don’t you dare,” he said, squeezing you closer. 

You trailed your fingers up and down his waist, feeling more content than you had in ages. 

“I can’t believe you’d suggest that I would have sex with you right after confessing my feelings. Like, take me to dinner first at least.” 

“Oh my god,” you half-exclaimed, half-laughed. You felt your cheeks heat up again, grateful it was still too dark in the room to be noticeable. “You’re right, I’m so sorry. How’s next Friday?” 

“Hmm, I don’t know. My work schedule is kind of unpredictable. I’ll have to get back to you.” 

“You’re such an ass.” 

A few short hours later, you were back on the jet with the rest of the team. You were lying on the couch while Spencer sat in a seat one row up and across from you, both to avoid suspicion and so you could try to catch up on sleep. He sat facing away from you, but with the angle you were at you could still see one side of his face if you tilted your head up. 

You were just beginning to fade when your phone buzzed next to you. 

Spencer: I have to tell you something, coworker to coworker. 

You looked up to see him blank faced, looking down at the book in his right hand, holding his phone in the left. 

You text back: okay? 

Spencer: My crush asked me out last night. 

You’re exceptionally glad no one was sitting close enough to see you. Spencer had caught you off guard, and you felt an infatuated grin spreading across your face. 

You: what did u say? 

Spencer: Wanted to get your opinion first. 

You: i think u should say yes, obviously. 

Spencer: Idk, I’m kinda nervous. I think she’s trying to jump me on the first date.

You just barely managed to refrain from laughing out loud. You looked up at Spencer again, and he’s looking at his phone as if it contained nothing more than a weather report. You’re astounded. 

You: one could argue that technically you’ve already slept together, so there’s less to be nervous abt

You saw his eyebrows raise just slightly. Success. 

Spencer: You’re trouble, you know that? See you Friday night

You: i promise i won’t try to jump you 

Spencer: Oh

Spencer: I fear I may have shot myself in the foot here

You: i wouldn’t worry about it too much

Spencer: That’s rich coming from you 

You rolled your eyes even though he couldn't see you. 

You: whatever. wear something sexy ;) 

You heard him blow air out of his nose, an almost laugh. 

“Something funny?” you heard Derek ask. 

Shit. 

“This book contains a historical inaccuracy that was proven incorrect eight years before its publishing date,” Spencer replied without missing a beat. 

Unbelievable.

You: you’re unhinged :*

Spencer: Go to sleep already, would you? 

You: coworker to coworker? my crush keeps interrupting my beauty sleep 

Spencer: He’s probably worried about the worldwide implications of you becoming any more beautiful 

You: i guess that’s why the universe gave you insomnia :( too pretty 

Spencer: Stop flirting with me

You: bc you’re too delicate?? 

Spencer: Yes 

You snapped your phone shut, feeling dazed. You watched the clouds go by in the window across from you, and you couldn’t help letting your gaze slide over to Spencer. He’d put his phone down as well, concentrating on his book. Or pretending to concentrate. He was turning the pages much too slowly for his actual pace. 

You: you have got to do a better job of fake reading than that

You heard a page turn. 

You looked up again to see the ghost of a smile threatening the corner of his mouth. 

This was going to be fun. And also, you were so screwed. 

[inumakis-boo]

TOGE INUMAKI ⟢. ݁₊⋆.˚ ༘♡˚

fanfiction synopsis ␥ you and toge inumaki are both in your third year of jujustu high, but youve barely spent a moment alone yet. when you do on a saturday night, you realize exactly why you need to "hang out" more // aka, the first step to being friends with benefits.. hooking up the first time.

word count - 4,629 // hope you enjoy! tw obviously.

You would have never guessed how this night would end, compared to its beginning. Like something you would have read in a terrible booktok novel with its cliches and tropes- but you could have never understood how even cliches, imitate life.

It was finally Saturday night, and all of the second and third years sat in Itadori’s room, with the dim blue LED lights circling them, and posters of clad women on the wall to give off the perfect teenage boy aesthetic. Some game was going on the TV and both Itadori and Nobara had been occupying everyone's attention with their shouting and cheers as they fought on screen.

You didn’t know exactly how or why or when, someone had swiped a bottle of something, and now it lay on the mats on the floor, empty with a broken seal. At least everyone had gotten more than a few sips of the fire in the bottle, and you struggled to swallow it, but you still smiled after and laughed. It made the stress of training on the body at least feel a little better as your fingertips buzzed.

Nobody checked the time, and everyone laid out on his bed, on the floor, on the desk and chair. It wouldn’t be too much of a problem- all the teachers would be gone for the weekend. After all, they were all old enough that Satoru Gojo wouldn’t have to babysit constantly, right?

They sat, comfortably then, letting the TV be loud and the shouting obnoxious.

It had taken you awhile to notice, but one member had been missing for the last few minutes with no explanation. You double-checked the room and did not see the violet-eyed boy sitting anywhere. He had last taken a few sips of the bottle and beat Itadori in a game, before at some point dipping for.. whatever reason.

Perhaps he had gotten sick or was fetching something? You decided to go check it out. You silently got up off the floor and didn’t pay much attention as everyone laughed at Itadori dying for the 7th time tonight.

The hallway was darker than usual, but it was probably too late anyway. Moonlight shone through the panes of the window, their crossed shapes decorating the hardwood down the hall, each window revealing the silky glow from the outside. Your eyes followed down and caught to one pattern disturbed.

You follow it up and see the one you were checking on, leaning on the window sill, soaking up the moonlight. It glimmered against the pale skin of his face but did not fade the marks around his mouth.

You slowly walk over, and he tears his eyes from the scene towards you and smiles a little. Instinctually, he pulls out his phone.

“You look happy.” You remark, and his smile grows as he types into the notes app.

// Just felt like walking around, but seeing you here is better. //

You were familiar with his real personality beyond the curse lodged in his throat, the silly and rather typical teenage boy attitude in everything he did. But for some odd reason, it was seeing it face to face was a difference. You had only maybe a few conversations with him before over text, and while you trained together in class, didn’t mean you were used to him yet.

// Something happen? //

“Nah.” You lean on the sill with your body, feeling the open breeze come in. “You're not missing anything.”

He just smirks with a little head shake, and his eyes that had met yours look back to the sill.

// I won’t keep you here, //  He types as you look over. // I should be back soon. //

“I’m not in a rush to watch Megumi and Itadori argue about the game rules again.” You smile and snicker. “Out here is nice.”

// Not surprised about that at all // He snickers aloud, // I would like company. //

The moonlight and the random liquor someone brought must have been messing with your senses- He felt welcoming and charming, and in this space, it was more private than anywhere else.

“You had plenty of company in there.” You bring it up, but he just shrugs. Perhaps he wasn’t asking for that kind of head-ache-inducing company.

He scrolled up again to the first note.

// ..it is better seeing you here.//

What was happening with your stomach? It was like something was bubbling up, in a good way. He gazed with an interested eye. and you tried to hold back a dopey grin.

He turns to face away from the window and stretches. You watch him turn back to you, his face now in the dark of the hall. He types-

//I am going to go back to my room, wanna me to walk you back to everyone else?//

“W-What?” You stutter embarrassingly, then clear your throat- “Nono, you don’t have to. It is only down the hall. Let me walk you instead.”

Ah, his smile was so genuine, and he brushed back his hair for a moment before shrugging. A visual okay.

You begin to walk with Him down the silver halls, cusping your hands in yours, watching as you walk in step, his dorm slippers on with his casual sweatpants and navy t-shirt. He wanted to be comfortable- it wasn’t even the first time you had seen him in casual clothes.. although it was more of a rare sight to not see his mouth covered.

You blindly follow him to his room, your eyes catching peeks of his face. He still looked like he did last year according to school photos, but his jaw was more defined, and of course, his inky markings had always made themselves apparent. You thought they were interesting, like any tattoo or scar.

His eyes look at you curiously, and you realize you're just staring at him and look away. You don’t look back, even though he brushes his arm against yours. He had little words to say, yet had better social skills than anybody here. It didn’t feel awkward though, it was just a little new. You hadn’t really noticed him before.. nor had you noticed him noticing you.

Both of you arrived at his dorm room, a little wood plaque around his doorknob that was a gift, a salmon emoji that had been painted for him hung there. It was cute, and you watched it as the door opened.

Toge stepped into his room and didn’t bother to flick on the lights, the full moon shining right through his windows. You couldn’t see much but you could smell him from outside of the room, a mix of his shampoo and cologne- fresh and warm. It almost pulled you in.

He turned after he kicked off his slippers, coming back to the door with his notes presented still.

// We should hang out more often. I think you're fun. //

You shake your head with a laugh. How did he come to that conclusion?

“We didn’t even do anything..!” You laugh, rubbing your arms. Toge returns to his phone. “How would you know?”

// Yeah but, I have my reasons, don’t I? Maybe I have a feeling. //

Okay, maybe your knees had good reason to be weak. Was he flirting? His face seemed to say so.

And.. what could happen if you tested the waters? You hadn’t ever flirted with many people before but.. he was just a friend, right?

You look down the hall and bite your lower lip with a smile. “What kind of feeling?”

It is his turn to look away, leaning against the door frame. He is trying to not smile too hard, you can see.

“Are you feeling like.. we should hang out sooner than later?"

You were wondering if others had drunk more than you had, and according to his eyes, sizing you up, you had an inkling that he might've had just enough to not fear with his expressions. If he was truly cautious, he would be covering his mouth, right?

And according to the feeling between your legs, you had little filter to worry about.

He took a step once, then twice until your chests were practically meeting, and he looked like he had already decided what he wanted, and was bold about it. While your heart was still beating, even if rapidly, you wouldn’t stop until you figured him out.

Of course, he typed with one hand by your side, then presented.

// I am feeling like you are curious about me like I am curious about you, and I wanna see more. Only if you wanna. //

He had read you like a book. You licked your lips and sighed, looking up at him. His hair had been pushed back some since he arrived at his dorm, and the warmth from his body mixed with his cologne was driving you nuts. You wondered how toned he was under these clothes- and wondered if he thought about you the same way.

“If you're so curious..” Your hand slipped onto his pec- firm and warm. “How about you come find out?”

That would do it- one smirk and another step and his lips were pressing against yours. So softly at first, but once your hand had slowly crept up his neck and pulled him just a tad closer, you could feel the intensity rise, his tongue running across your lips and into your open mouth, hands running up and down your hips, never pulling you further but always closer.

Then you could feel him moving back and pulling you with him. You were still in the hallway outside of his dorm, after all. You accepted it- and had no room to even protest. He was too good of a kisser and knew exactly how to take control, not much of a surprise there.

By the time you had started paying attention again, you heard the decoration on his door tap on the door as it closed shut, and realized vaguely you were in a dark room with his boy that just moments ago, considered nothing more than friendly with.

How far this was going to go or fear of being caught was honestly the last thing on your mind. He had reiled you up and at this point, he could have anything he asked for. He wanted to know, he needed to know.

You let his tongue slip into your mouth as his hands run underneath your shirt, his hands on your skin sending you even more haywire. It was addictive, and you were determined to make the same reaction out of him- if not better.

You let your fingers curl in his hair, pushing him forward more, his warm sigh against your cheek telling you how much he was enjoying this. He deserved it, for being so nice to you, and coming onto you like that, making you feel so nervous and witty. You let him guide you to somewhere in his room, and suddenly you can feel the edge of something behind your ass. You were slightly pinned to the end of his bed frame, just enough to keep you from running away.

His knee slowly dragged between the gap of your legs, and the proximity made you sigh in appreciation. He hummed, yet didn’t dare leave your lips. He was being so explorative, passionately involved in every toss of your tongue in your mouth and every patch of skin he touched. His fingertips were dragging across your flesh, and the entire time you could barely keep yourself sane enough to touch him back.

But you did- starting at his navel, just to make him sigh through his nose as his kisses traveled from your mouth to your neck and ear, the brush of his face and lips making you want to squirm with delight. Then, the palm of your hand, just teasing enough, palmed his firm abs, defined so perfectly that you could imagine them in your dreams just by touch alone- but here you were, touching his so wantingly. Your fingertips, like his, grazed so temptingly across his obliques, feeling their tightness and the rumble in his chest easily.

At this point, his shirt was bunching at your wrists, and as a final act of teasing, simply made a motion to pull it up, and meeting violet eyes as he did could’ve made you sink to your knees at a moment. His eyes were lidded and needy, and his lips were pinker with friction, and you could only imagine if he was the type to leave marks behind.

The white shirt had been tossed, maybe on his desk chair, he clearly hadn’t cared where it ended up, because he was too busy doing the exact same to you. You wouldn’t even break eye contact, wouldn’t dare, as his hands sat right below your bra, and could feel the urge in his grip to just take it off right then and there.

Maybe helping his urges wouldn’t be so bad, right?

You took his hand, and encouraged the back of his, allowing him to sneak under the wire and squeeze your perky tits, watching his eyes return to yours as he squeezed on his own.

There was no way you were returning to your dorm room tonight.

Next thing you knew, your bra wire was sitting right near the top of your breasts as he had leaned down, holding his head as he licked and sucked on the hard nipples, rolling one in the other hand. It was erotic, watching his tongue, marked with the scar of his curse, flicking your cute buds to make your body jello in his hands. It was extremely hot, and you knew that these panties were going to be ruined by the time you let him tear them off of you.

Speaking of underwear, you forced his head to lay next to your neck, returning his lower half to be in your grasp, and immediately got to work palming at the other. He sure was enjoying that attention, letting you fondle your smaller hand against his clothed thickness, shuttering at the idea of sitting right on it. The lewd thoughts were going a mile a minute, and you weren’t planning on stopping.

He continued to pull at your sensitive little buds as you fondled him, his breath becoming heavy against your neck as you thoroughly got an idea of what to expect- but hands wandered on his side, and you knew that his long fingers were not going to be idle much longer. His entire hand curled around your mound over your sweatpants, and the pressure in his fingertips along your pantied slit was driving you nuts.

But, with bra abandoned on the floor, he moved you with his hand still on your crotch to the side of the bed, his forehead against yours as he switched places and sat down first, then brought you into his lap.

You could tell he was not going to be rough in manhandling you, just simply moving you just to better fit his need to touch you, and the touch alone was enough to make it obvious how wet you were- and he became very aware the moment he dragged down the band of your sweatpants to reveal the heat of your pussy, throbbing with need for any kind of friction, by anything.

You could hear the hum in his throat, the holding back of a groan as he touched the lace of your underwear and found it moist, clearly satisfied with all that had been hidden before. You could feel the grind of his cock against your ass as he leaned back more into the headboard and pillows, making your torso almost barely sit up, while your legs were pulled apart so easily by setting them on opposite sides of his own knees. You were so bare, and his fingers trailing around your clit, throbbing with need, was enough to make you moan into the air, your chest rising with the lighting going through you.

“Be quiet.” The command shot through you instantly, and your mouth closed, only faint whimpers lodged in your throat managing to make any noise- anyone could hear, of course, it was late.

But no- that was only one half of the coin. The other half was being able to hear the gushing noises as he softly slapped your wet folds, just enough to hear it, and being forced to hear how needy you had become. His other hand held your jaw close to his neck, and let you cover your whimpers there. You moved your ass against his length just below, but he wasn’t done here.

One finger had slipped in so easily with all the lubrication gushing out of you, but the second dreadful finger had entered so achingly slow, pushing your insides slowly apart as he made a few experimental pumps before sinking them deep and curling, slow at first then faster and faster.

You weren’t going to make it like this. You were bound to cum, splayed out like a breeding slut for him, taking his fingers as he fucks you so earnestly, and sighs and grunts like he is fucking you, all the while not even having the pleasure to groan out yourself- only forced to hear how much your pussy needed his cock soon, and by soon, you meant thirty minutes ago, out in the hall way in the moonlight outside of Itadoris bedroom.

“Haah..” He grazed your ridges so slowly that you almost came, his thumb flicking your swollen clit too many times to count. He was too good at this.

You couldn’t handle it anymore- it was either you were going to cum here, or he would fuck you. Or both. Hopefully both.

Your fingertips grab onto his waist band and try to pull it down, but the angle is hard and you almost grow frustrated. He only bites his lip, forces your head so he can kiss you, and drags his own pants down, lifting both of you up to do so briefly.

Your first contact with his cock is when it slaps against your wet folds, the tip of his dick just brush so teasingly against your slit that you can barely imagine how you would somehow fit it in your throat eventually (hopefully, eventually, if she made it out alive.)

Now he was gasping, the mix of the delicate heat on his shaft, the wetness leaking from your needy hole, and his tiphead rubbing against your clit was even driving him insane. His hands were bruisingly gripping your waist, keeping you still as he slides up and down, shifting his hips to graze his tip all around your folds.

“P-Please, Toge-” You manage out when he gets weaker, your watery eyes and whimpering tone catching his ear immediately. “I want y-you to fuck me.”

He wouldn’t resist that kind of plea, not when he himself wasn’t sure how much longer he was going to last- fuck it, he would use his curse to go longer if he needed too, as long as he was buried inside your cunt when it happened.

You felt it, instantly as the tip of his cock buried slowly into your hole, finally, stretching so good you were ready to about give up and let him take you anyway he wished. He was not going to let that happen though, you had to witness it all, how good he was laying it down.

The shaft went deeper and deeper until you felt the tip graze your delicate cervix, even with this much preparation, you still knew it was going to be bruised tomorrow morning. Fuck it, what did you care. Toge Inumaki was going to fuck you, and hearing his whimpering as he finally hit his base against your folds was like music to your ears.

He pumped it in, slowly and surely, until the pumps couldn't be timed anymore as he was, becoming steady thrusts into your creaming cunt that the hand on your jaw moved to your lips to block any noise from escaping.

God, his cock was so perfectly heavy just enough to burn your entrance as he entered over and over again, and perfectly long to make you groan into the palm of his hand as he slams it into you. It was too erotic the noise, what was the point of even covering your voice? Between his huffing and the squelching, it would be instantly noticeable to anyone outside the door.

Yet, he fucked your pussy until you could feel all the wetness gather at the base, dripping down his shaft. He didn’t even care beyond holding your mouth in his palm to conceal the noise.

But, he wasn’t done yet. No.. one final trick.

“Sit up and face me.” He whispered, and thank goodness you did not resist whatsoever to spare his voice, already so weak, you found yourself slipping his fat cock out of your needy cunt, and turning around, watching him readjust himself to look at you.

Yep, as expected. Face nothing more than a filthy reaction, dimmed and teary eyes, bitten lips, and red-got ears and cheeks, followed by cute red marks all along your neck, just enough to match your pink, toyed nipples against your pale skin, and finally, hand marks to go right along with glistening folds, already drooling all over the cock in his hand, directed right at your hole.

His hair had long since been pushed back, and his cheeks and lips were the same hue of red, his chest sweaty from bearing your heat on it as he fucked you on your back against it, and finally, silvery hair trimmed right at the base of his hard cock which throbbing and beading with precum.

“Sit on it, like a good girl.”

You had no inclination to do otherwise, feeling the tip enter you again, but this time, so much deeper than you knew another could go. It spreaded you out perfectly, watching as he got a perfect view of your hole, stretched around his dick while your tits sat prettily on your chest, hands stabilizing you on his hips.

You sat fully on it, your insides spazzing as it throbbed inside you, and you watched his face as he relished in the feeling, so completely trying to hold back from the display in front of him.

You wanted him to tell you exactly what to do- you were going to be his plaything tonight, no matter how much embarrassment you would feel in the morning, you were addicted to the idea of this man find every weak spot inside you, and letting him do exactly what he wanted.

He got the memo very fast.

“Bounce up and down, baby.” He whispered again, and your thighs moved, allowing you up and down on his shaft with ease. Even the burning in your thighs had disappeared, thanks to his order. You let his cock pump into your the first few time, watching as he tilted his head back to feel the bare heat, the friction of your ridges inside of you dragging across his head and shaft constantly.

You didn’t tire of watching him, not of him holding your hips and guiding you even though his words had done enough, not tiring of watching his eyes roll back, his mouth opening to moan aloud, his abs squeezing as he control his abdomen from reacting. It was your turn to watch him fall apart, and with all the foreplay with your tits and clit, you thought it well-deserved, if not vengeful.

You gained confidence as you rode him, hearing the slickness coat your thighs then meeting his, creating a sound so erotic it would get you both kicked out of jujutsu high, but you didn’t care when you grabbed his hands from your waist and let them grope at your tits, watching his eyes dilate with the motion of them moving in his hands. It went right to your abdomen as you felt his fingers pull at your already tender nipples.

You weren’t ever going to be the same after this- of course, you fooled around briefly before you joined the third years before Jujustu High, being a late bloomer, but this was going to be part of every wet dream, every shower spent with your fingers deep in your holes, would be about this moment, with his eyes grazing over you like he had a million things to say and command, and you're expected (and will) obey every single one, simply because he could fuck you to the point that you hoped he cummed right inside of you.

The very thought was going to make you explode, right on the base of his cock, you were going to lose all control, and nothing but his words were going to stop it.

But he was waiting for the perfect time- no, he wanted to cum with you, at the same moment, wanted you to cream right inside you as you creamed on him. He was going to make you remember this night, when you discovered all of him.

The sickening slaps had increased, and the effect of his words had worn off, but you didn’t care. The feeling of your g-spot being constantly rubbed into, fucked into, was all that mattered. His hands abandoned your tits for now, and instead, settled right on your face, and brought you down to kiss him. Now, it was his turn.

He trusted his hips deep in your cunt, and if nobody knew you two were fucking, somebody probably knew now. The dick was simply too good to even speak, feeling your lips wet with drool as he kissed you, your tongue being eagerly played with as he entered your mouth. He wanted you to go insane- he refused to be the only one.

Finally, he pressed your forehead against his, with both of your sweaty bodies rubbing together as he fucked your cunt easily with a flick of his hips, your moans and breath sharing the same space between your faces, he couldn’t resist any more. Not any longer could he hold out, now when you looked so prettily drunk on sex.

“I want you to cum.” He managed in a guttural demand. “Right now.”

The squeeze of your walls finally killed him as your racked out a deliciously loud moan turned whine, his hot cum shooting right into your clenching pussy as you leaked all over him, twitching and stuttering and faltering, head meeting his chest and neck as she came hard, right where she wanted to the most.

He holds you with both arms around your back, giving slowing thrusts into your sensitive cunt, tits and chest heaving against his as your whimper and whine, until he finally comes to a stop, and with the missing of friction, comes out his hard cock, and the load dripping onto his navel that he had buried deep inside you.

You were delirious with sex, completely and utterly spent as you panted against his chest, feeling his breath match yours so perfectly it was calming your brain down. You couldn’t stop twitching though, and you didn’t know if and when you would stop.

“Breathe..” He whispered, using probably the last of his energy to calm you down. Of course, it works, and you can feel yourself take a deep breath and release it with a shuttering take.

“Is it okay.. if I stay?”

You could hear the soft noise of him tapping a screen.

// To hang out? //

You smiled weakly, and lifted up a finger to type back.

// yes pls. //

Thank you all for reading! I had rewritten this, it was supposed to much more vague but.. i like this better.

anyways, @inumakisser and @nectardaddy this is for you pookies, i promised fr to deliver.

see ya later!

[lordprettyflackotara]

super rich kids || sam golbach & colby brock

SMUT MINORS DNI 18+. tw: drug usage to like the max extent, snc & reader are highkey all horny rich drug addicts. there are very much angsty undertones. i do not encourage nor condone inappropriate drug usage. threesome, anal, lots of praise honestly, double penetration.

“Well, that’s another party for the books!” Sam cheered.

The three of you had sobered up after a long night of partying, the mansion finally quiet as Colby finished climbing through the secret hatch to the root. The roof tile was rough against your bare legs, your sequin dress riding up your thighs. You had been friends with the boys since childhood, them becoming successful youtubers while you were their undercover manager. The money and fame had been around for quite a few years now, the only thing keeping any of you going being each other. “We throw parties like five times a month dude, this one was definitely tame compared to the others,” Colby countered. The sunrise was coming over the horizon, bright yellows and oranges painting the skies.

“At least this one wasn’t bombarded with fans. ‘Oh my God it’s Sam and Colby!! Oh my God!!’ Like fuck off let me do a line in peace,” You said, brutally mocking the fans who had snuck their way into the boys last party. “Speaking of lines, you got anymore on you?” Sam asked. Colby settled in beside you, bringing his knees closer to him. “I fuckin wish, maybe then I wouldn’t be such a bitch,” You hummed, mentally slapping yourself for not reserving some coke for after the thrasher. You all dug into your pockets, trying to find something to get high off of. You all came up empty handed, a groan escaping your lips. Sam playfully elbowed you, giving you a small grin.

“Relax pretty princess, when’s the last time we’ve all been sober anyways?”

The question stung like a fresh burn, the gears in your head slowly turning. Truthfully you couldn’t recall. When was the last time you all three had been sober together? Coke wasn’t any of your main choices but a party was a party, right? Wealth brought a lot of things. Drugs, fake friends, soul sucking lovers who only saw you for the dollar amount over your head. “Oh look there’s Emma and her crew,” Sam pointed at the white van pulling through the gates. The three of you felt like you saw the boys cleaning crew more than you saw any of your so called social media friends. “We should probably buy them a better car that van looks like shit,” Colby commented.

You tucked your knees up to your chest, watching Sam wave to the cleaning crew. “They should be used to seeing us up here. They know we love this view,” Sam said. You felt like shit, your high having plummeted and leaving you out to dry. “This fucking sucks,” You grumbled, nuzzling your face into your arm. Colby threw his arm around you, bringing you closer to him. “The come down doesn’t last forever, you’ll be alright,” He said encouragingly. Truthfully he felt just as shitty as you did. You leaned your head against him, taking a deep breath. When’s the last time you had been sober enough to feel yourself breathe? “Do you think life will always be like this?” You asked. The boys turned to look at you. “What do you mean by that?” Sam asked. You forced yourself to blink your eyes open, wrapping your arms around your legs. “I mean this can’t be it right? The ecstasy is great but it feels like shit when it’s over. Is money the real root to happiness or am I missing something here?” You asked.

“Are you sure the real key to happiness isn’t xanax?”

“Colby!”

Sam went to reach over you to playfully smack Colby, causing you to chuckle and roll your eyes. Once they settled down Sam spoke again, “Seriously though, I think that all that matters in this life is the three of us. As long as we have each other the rest will turn out fine.”

You could feel your smudged eyeliner burning your eyes, causing your waterlines to water. “Awe cmon, let’s get miss existential crisis cleaned up,” Colby chuckled, helping you rise to your feet. The three of you went into Sam’s bathroom, that shower being the biggest out of the three. Maybe it was some weird attachment issues all of you had, but you each felt the need to be around the others at all times. This included showers, after the time you passed out in scorching hot water from a bad reaction to Valium. How were you supposed to know how much mg it was? You never asked those kinds of questions. After that the three of you were closer then ever, showering and sleeping in each others beds like kids. Even with all the money in the world you only found comfort in one another. The water was warm, a soft groan escaping your lips as you tilted your head back towards the water.

“Feel that good huh?” Sam teased. You splashed water at him, the blonde laughing as he joined you. The shower was anything but small, multiple shower heads hung from the ceiling and marble seating on the sides. It had more than enough room for three people, that certainly didn’t keep you all from staying close together though. Colby shut the shower door, the three of you soaking in the warmth the shower provided. “We should’ve gotten something for the come down,” You sighed. trying to relax. You felt Sam’s arms wrap around your waist, while Colby cupped your face. You melted under their touch, your gaze meeting Colby’s. “Why don’t you let us take care of that?” He purred. One other thing to note about your dynamic with the boys, one that was far more notable than anything previous mentioned, was your love for them.

There were no labels tied to the three of you. But in a world of stds and crazy fans trying to get themselves pregnant to trap them, you only trusted one another. You melted into Colby’s kiss, wrapping your arms around his neck to pull him closer. The wealth and drugs meant nothing at all if you couldn’t have them at the end of the day. Sam moved your hair away from your neck, placing his lips against your skin. Sam loved to litter you with hickies. Watching you get all flustered when asked who gave them to you was a sight to see. You groaned into Colby’s mouth as Sam’s hands explored your body, caressing and squeezing every curve. The only high you could never get enough of, one that could never be replaced, was the one the boys provided you. You could feel both boys grow hard around you, your hands slithering down to both of their cocks. Sam chuckled from behind you, slithering his hand down to your cunt.

The hot water and both boys on you like wild animals was suffocating in the best way possible. You pumped both of them in unison, sinful noises from all three of you bouncing around the shower walls. Sam’s fingers slowly swirled around your clit, causing you to moan louder than you had anticipated. “Awe there’s our noisy girl,” Colby praised. Your eyes fluttered closed as he kissed the other side of your neck, just as eager as Sam to litter you with marks. It was hard enough explaining how you gained hickies on one side of your neck, nevertheless both. You tried to focus on jerking both of the boys off, your focus becoming skewed as Sam's fingers began to circle your clit faster. Your moans were becoming louder and more uncontrolled, the boys exchanging devious smirks. "Theres no doubt the maids can hear her," Colby stated calmly, as if he was discussing the weather. He took the opportunity to gently nibble at your neck, causing your ass to press against Sam. "I think that's what she wants, isn't it?" Sam asked teasingly.

The blonde slithered down to your entrance, shoving two fingers inside. "She's already so wet for us Colby, you should feel it," Sam said, rutting his hips into your hand. The brunette stared down at you lustfully, his pupils blown with lost. "I think I will," He agreed. You whined as Colby shoved a finger inside of your cunt alongside Sam's, mimicking Sam's curling upwards. "S-So full," You whimpered, grabbing onto Colby for support. Colby shoved in another finger, your walls spasming as they struggled to take both boys sets of fingers. The four fingers buried inside of you were stretching you to what felt like your limit, your eyes fluttering shut. "Sorry pretty princess, you know i'm not a patient man," Colby chuckled. You bit your bottom lip, your gummy walls clinging to their digits. They matched each others pace, curling their fingers at the same time. You could feel them brush against your g spot, your head tilting back against Sam's shoulder for support. Your hips were moving on their own, involuntarily grinding against their fingers, begging for more.

"What's wrong? Four fingers not enough for you?" Sam asked mockingly, nibbling at your earlobe. Colby grabbed your throat, squeezing the sides, He brought his thumb to your lip, pulling it downwards assertively. "Oh don't be so mean Sam, you know there's only one way she can cum," He reminded him. It was true, the amount of drugs you all consumed affecting the way you were able to orgasm. You couldn't even recall everything you had tried, but you did know a couple of things for sure. While high on whatever was presented in front of you, you could cum in all kinds of ways. There was no limit, the boys able to make you cum off of anything. A brief memory of them getting you off by having you hump the side of the bathroom sink while they watched came to mind. But sober? There was only one way for you to find sweet relief. "You know what to do, jump for us," Sam cooed encouragingly. You did as instructed, both sets of their strong hands helping you wrap your legs around Colby's waist. You relaxed under their grasp, trusting them to know they'd keep you in position.

Their fingers abandoned your cunt, a whine escaping your lips as you clenched around nothing. "Would you do the honors Colb?" Sam asked, rubbing his shaft up and down the molds of your ass. The brunette and you watched as he rubbed his cock up and down your folds, before slowly shoving it inside of you. You moaned his name, both of you mesmerized as your cunt eagerly pulled him in. "Think she's desperate for us," Colby said casually. The boys had an ongoing bit where they talked to each other as if you weren't there, your body a dead give a way you loved every second of it. "Is that so? Hurry up and get in there so I can give her what she wants," Sam chuckled, kissing up the side of your neck to help with the stretch. There was never an issue with whoever took your cunt, the real challenge was whoever took you from behind. You could feel Colby's large hands securely grabbing your ass, spreading it apart for Sam's viewing. His tip brushed against your g spot, your body tensing as Sam spat on your asshole. "Relax pretty girl, you've done this before," Colby cooed, trying to refocus your attention back on him. He brought his lips to yours, entrancing you in a mesmerizing kiss as Sam began to push himself inside of you from behind.

You gasped into Colby's mouth, his teeth grazing your bottom lip as Sam pushed into you. You felt so full, your legs shaking as both boys held you up. Sam was rolling his bottom lip in between his teeth, slowly but surely pushing into you. "Doing so well for us," The blonde panted, the three of you becoming one. Your nails dug into Colby's arm, promising to leave marks afterwards. Both boys had bottomed out in both of your holes, something they had done many times before. "Please m-move," You sputtered, allowing your eyes to flutter shut as the pain and pleasure mixed together as they started to move their hips in unison. The three of you were all moaning messes as they picked up their paces. "Such a good girl, taking us so well," Sam praised, slithering his hand down to your clit. He began rubbing fast circles, the three of you desperate for a taste of euphoria. "So desperate for us, fucking hell," Colby groaned, watching your cunt hungrily take his cock with each thrust. You felt full to the maximum extent, your thighs trembling. You were sure if it weren't for their strong hands you would have fallen. They abused your holes as they pleased, your moans only becoming louder.

"I think she wants the maids to hear her, dirty girl," Colby snickered. Sam pinched your clit, causing you to cry out in confusion, pain, and pleasure. The boys chuckled, your vision seeing stars as they fucked you senseless. "Ah that did it Sam, I think she's gonna cum soon," The brunette continued, fucking up into your cunt. Your eyes fluttered open, the warm water creating small droplets in your eyelashes. "Am nottt," You slurred, the knot in your stomach tightening. They were always able to do this, without even trying. They knew your body so well it was hypnotizing. "Cumming already? Someone really is our personal slut," Sam chimed in. You wanted to argue more, but your body was giving in to their thrust. Their grip on you was steel like, their thrust merciless as they abused your holes. You couldn't even warn them of your orgasm, your body convulsing as you came around their cocks. Your vision was blinded with stars, your body becoming limp in their arms. Spots clouded your vision, your breath growing shallow as you were on the brim of passing out. Your heart worked overtime when you were sober, unable to keep up with extreme forms of euphoria without a substance to assist it.

You could hear the boys talking, their voices mumbled and incoherent as your eyes rolled into the back of your head. As your vision faded into darkness, a thought of getting clean crossed your mind.

"Pretty princess?"

You blinked as you snapped out of your day dreaming state, recalling the events of a couple of months ago. You turned to Sam, who was holding up a silver platter with your favorite white dust decorating it.

"Want a bump?"

You nodded as he handed you a rolled up hundred dollar bill, holding his own to his nose. You watched him snort the line, your veins coursing with excitement. Maybe you'd become sober one day, but not anytime soon. Besides, what super rich kid doesn't live life this way. There's nothing else to make one feel so alive, right?

[localplaguenurse]

What Could Go Wrong?

Mothman Dottore X Fem Reader Smut (Kinktober Week 3)

Give it up for week three! FINALLY I write Dottore smut after two years jfc. Harpyttore was very tempting, but part of the challenge is that I can’t write anything I’ve already read in another fic. So Mothman.

WARNINGS: Moths, inaccurate/inappropriate use of moth facts, scent kink (?), mating/in heat, I think this one is actually pretty chill compared to the last two, more silly I think

Minors DNI

“I know you’re smarter than this,” you hear your lab partner and best friend remark, “you have to know this is stupid, right?”

You finish loading your film into the kamera and delicately put the spare film back in your bag with your notebook, your pencil case, lamp, fire starting kit, jasmine oil, jar of honey, and a vile wrapped up in cloth and secured in a wooden box. There are other supplies in the bag, but these are absolutely essential for your task tonight. The little box is especially important.

“You can’t honestly believe there is a man sized moth living in the forest,” they continue as you take inventory of your gear. 

“I’m skeptical too,” you say, “but can I call myself a lepidopterist if I pass this up? Or even just an entomologist?”

“You even admit it’s bullshit!” “Hey, I said I was skeptical, but not why,” you state. “Do I believe in a man sized moth? No. Do I believe there is a large species of moth living deep in the Dharma Forest that has yet to be properly discovered and identified? That’s more likely.”

“Even then, the driyoshes who came screaming about seeing the moth admitted later that it was probably just a large bird of sorts.”

You close your bag up. “You can just say you’re not coming with me,” you tell them, “you can just say you don’t believe it and don’t want to come, but you don’t have to talk to me like I’m dumb.”

“I just don’t want you getting eaten by tigers while you’re out there.” “I know which paths to avoid, and I’m pretty sure the driyoshes were on one of the safer ones.”

Your friend shakes their head in defeat. “I can’t convince you otherwise, can I?” “Nope.”

They pinch the bridge of their nose. “Just… explain the thought process behind what you’re bringing.”

You smile. “Okay, so the kamera, the notebook and my camping supplies are self explanatory. I’m camping out there for the next few days, and I need actual proof this thing exists.”

“Okay.”

“The lamp is for navigating in the dark, and the fire kit is for camping out in the forest,” you continue, “but they also double as sources of light and heat, which can attract moths.”

They nod along.

“Jasmines are a commonly liked flower among moths,” you say, “so I figured the smell of jasmine oil would attract them. Honey is a food source.”

“And your source for that?”

“Adult moths primarily consume nectar or sugary substances if they have mouths,” you state, “especially the death’s-head hawkmoth. They actually create a squeaking noise similar to queen bees that allow them to sneak into hives and eat their honey. Not that I think this is a death’s-head, but it can’t hurt.”

“And that little box you snagged from the Amurta labs?”

“You make it sound like I stole it,” you say. “I have permission to use it.”

“Well, what is it?”

“...” You sigh. “As a last resort… I’m packing a vial of distilled moth pheromones.”

At this, your partner’s eyes widen and they bury their face in their hands, embarrassed for you. “Like mating pheromones?”

“Yes, like mating pheromones.”

“Okay, cool, interesting,” they say, “very important question though; what the fuck are you going to do if a horny, man sized moth swarms you thinking you’re a potential mate?”

“That… is a bridge I will cross when I get there.”

“Are you going to–”

“I’m not going to have sex with the giant moth,” you quickly interrupt, “I don’t even know how that could happen.”

“It’s a man sized moth, anything is possible.”

“I’m not that dedicated to my research,” you state, face burning. 

“Whatever, just… be safe, and don’t do anything stupid.”

“I’ll only be three days,” you tell them, “I’ll be back before you know it.”

You heave as you lift your bag up, and offer your partner a smile.

“What’s the worst that can happen?”

—

You’re thankful the moths seem more interested in your light and the honey you set out, but the stray little males still flutter up to you as you eat. You gently swat the fortieth one away, and two more come looking for the fertile female they’re smelling. You swat them away as well, ad infinitum.

At some point in your trip to your designated camping spot, the vial of moth pheromones had broken and leaked out of the box you kept it in, seeping into your clothes. The vial wasn’t that large, but by the great wisdom given to the researchers who made it, was it ever potent. It’s so potent, in fact, that there are several different breeds of moth trying to mate with the clothes you hung up to dry. You were hoping and praying the rain that suddenly came down last night would have helped wash away some of the smell, but no matter how much water you wrung from them, the pheromones are still noticeable to every moth in the vicinity. 

Your pajamas weren’t too affected and dried quickly, but clearly they still smell if the moths are still trying to get your attention. You’d wear the clothes from yesterday, but they’re just dirty in general and not ideal for sleep. It’s not like you’re getting much sleep, though. The flapping of hundreds of moths is getting annoying. On the bright side, at least you have something interesting to tell your partner when you get back to the Akademiya.

You finish up your little meal and begin tidying up. You pack away your dirty dishes while moths continue to harass you. Yeah, this was probably a really dumb idea, trying to hunt down a big ass moth. You’ll pack up and head back home tomorrow morning, still being swarmed by moths.

You manage to shoo the moths out of your tent before you secure the flap. You sigh and crawl into your sleeping bag. You shut your eyes, listening to the fluttering wings and little chirps.

Wait, chirps? Moths don’t squeak unless they’re trying to throw off predators like bats, or they’re trying to steal honey from bees undetected. As you sit up, you can hear the squeaking is getting louder, and the flapping of little wings is growing faster, more frantic.

You hesitantly peak out of your tent to see swarms squealing and screeching as they begin to escape into the night sky. Astonished, you step outside and look up. There are so many they nearly blot out the light of the moon, still squeaking in absolute terror. Your blood runs cold. It makes sense that once one moth lets out the alarm of a predator, others would follow, but with this many moths still drowning in the pheromones staining your clothes? This many moths in general?

You get your answer when a massive, solid shape blocks out the moon, and like a divine plague, the moths go into a desperate and swarming frenzy, pelting into your body and your face as they frantically make their escape. You drop to the ground and cover your eyes and mouth as the storm rages. You can only imagine how this looks from the outside. You wonder how far the eclipse of frightened bugs can be seen.

You lift your head up when the flaps quiet down, and the squeaks grow distant, and you’re no longer being violently bumped into. You look up to see clouds of moths literally eclipsing the moon and disappearing among the stars in the sky. You stand, looking around your campsite, at the surrounding treeline. Something is horribly wrong, what was that big thing in the sky? You only saw it briefly, but it was much larger than any man. There’s no way, it can’t be–

You snap around when you hear rustling in the shrubbery behind you. You swear you see something move in the shadows but it disappears too quickly to get a grasp on it. You try to recall the story of the monster the driyoshes told. It was a large, shadowy winged beast, and the only other thing they saw before they bolted were a pair of big, red eyes.

You dive for your pack, pulling everything out until your fingers make contact with the kamera. You yank it out and stand, eyes darting around at every little noise and movement. Then it’s quiet, and it stays quiet. You look up at the sky, and you can’t see the moths anymore.

A twig snaps behind you. You whip around and hit the button on the kamera. The flash blinds the red eyed creature, and it snarls and covers its face with a black arm. You scream and stumble back, falling on your ass and attempting to scramble away. 

It’s not a man sized moth, it’s a moth man.

He stands tall, black wings with pale blue patterns along the edge flying open in defence. Black fluff covers his shoulders and chest, and though his arms and legs, clawed and covered in fine little hairs, are black, his torso is primarily pale flesh coloured, as is his face. His scowling face is surprising human, save for the pointed teeth and large, glowing red eyes. His hair is pale blue, like the patterns on his wings, and the feathery antennae sprouting from the top are black.

You get a much better look at his features when he descends upon you, pinning you beneath his barely humanoid form, claws grasping at your wrists and holding them down to the ground. You feel shivers run up your spine as he stares at you, antennae twitching. He tilts his head, and leans in closer to your face. You close your eyes tight and turn your face away, scared he’s going to bite your face off.

You’re surprised when instead, he curls his body so he can rest his head on your chest, His antennae brush against your neck, and begin shivering. You squirm at the ticklish feeling. Then his wings begin to shake, and he lets out a deep groan as the rest of his body shudders. He lifts his head, lips pulled into a large grin that borders on predatory as he just stares.

“Oh… how lovely,” he purrs, “I can’t recall the last time I had the chance to mate.”

Your eyes widen, skipping over the fact this man-thing speaks common and jumping right to the meaning behind his words. “What?!”

He chuckles. “Your scent,” he clarifies, “it’s strong enough that it has brought almost every mature male moth to your location, myself included. But I know that’s not your natural scent, is it?”

You nervously shake your head.

“Of course not, you’re human,” he says. “And you’re one of those Akademiya students. That’s how you acquired those pheromones, no?”

“Y… Yes.”

“And you know what they do, don’t you?”

“I-I’m a lepidopterist,” you tell him, “I p-primarily study moths. I know what the pheromones do.”

Blood rushes to your face when the monster nuzzles his cheek against yours. His breath fans over your ear, and you question the flutter in your stomach when you hear the rasp in his voice.

“Then I have to wonder what your intentions were…”

You recall your roommate asking what you’re going to do if you encounter a giant horny moth, and you stating you would not fuck the giant moth. Well… he’s not really a full moth, is he? He’s pretty humanoid, oddly handsome at that, too, and is a self aware being. He’s into you, so… fuck it, why not. It’s not like you promised you wouldn’t have sex with a moth person, just no giant moths.

“I-It was intended as a last resort to see if you were real,” you say, “but accidents happen. Might as well m-make the most of it, haha…”

The moth just laughs. He lets go of one of your wrists and grabs the front of your shirt. With one pull, he rips it open. You squeak in surprise as the cool night air hits your skin. Rough, almost scaled hands grasp your breasts, and he trills at the squish of your flesh. You whine when he presses his body against you, slotting between your legs with willing ease.

“So soft,” he purrs, “so warm. Though I prefer my solitude away from humans, I must admit your body heat is divine.”

You don’t say anything, simply letting out breathy moans as he kneads your breasts, clawed fingers occasionally pinching your stiffened nipples. He doesn’t seem to mind, rather he relishes your little noises and fidgets. He lets out a little laugh when you try to lean into his touch some more.

You wrap your arms around his shoulders, and Archons, his fur is softer than you expected. He seems perplexed by the gesture, and a surprised little noise gets caught in his throat when you pull him into a kiss. You wonder how often he’s done something like this with another human or perhaps moth person when he slithers his tongue into your mouth. His tongue tastes sweet, sort of like honey with floral hints, perhaps he feeds on nectar and honey?

You stop wondering why he tastes sweet when you feel him rock his hips against you, feeling something grind into your clothed sex. He grunts into your mouth as he humps against you, and before you can process that, you jolt when you feel it shake. You pull back and try sitting up to look. You blink, face somehow getting warmer at the fascinating and arousing sight.

It’s a decent size, bigger than what you’re used to but not completely out of the realm of possibility. It’s dark, the ridges fading from black to red at the tip. It’s coated in a layer of slick, which you think you can attribute to the dripping slit it’s protruding from. When he chuckles, his twitching cock vibrates, but only in a short burst.

“W-Wait, you can–”

“I’m sure you know that trait is meant to ward off predators in most moths,” he states, “but since I have no natural predators, and am not a measly little moth… well, past humans I’ve mated with have found the trait useful.”

It’s true. Some moths, primarily male hawkmoths, rub the scales near their genitals to make a chirping noise that confuses bats. With that in mind, it sort of makes sense that this moth man has a similar ability that is simultaneously very different. You think a less horny and somehow less rational version of you would immediately sit up and ask a hundred questions, but all you can ask is how is that going to feel when it’s inside?

The moth’s antennae twitches, and he chuckles. “Oh? Eager, are we?”

“What?”

“Your pheromones are becoming stronger moment by moment,” he states, trailing a hand down to grasp his cock, “especially after observing this.” He leans in, pressing his forehead to your shoulder. “Such a lovely scent, I think I prefer it over the moth pheromones.”

Why you find that so flattering, you don’t know, but you do know from the pulse in your core that you want that thing in you as fast as you can get it in. You lift your hips up so you can slide your pajama bottoms and your underwear off. You barely get them off before the creature grabs your thighs and forces them apart, exposing your dripping heat. He wastes no time, urging you to wrap your arms and legs around him as his tip nudges against you. You let out a little whimper as he slowly grinds against you, then stills his hips. You gasp at the burst of vibration against your clit, and he chuckles.

“Oh, you’re going to be a fun little thing.”

Without any real warning, he presses the tip against your hole, pushing into you slowly. You jolt when he finally slips inside, moaning softly as he sinks deeper into your warmth. The ridges rubbing all along your walls are a feeling quite unlike anything else. Very different, and not at all bad. He groans so sweetly in your ear as he works his way down to the base. You whine at how full you feel, barely fitting him. The pressure of it all without adequate preparation makes you ache, but no sharp pains or anything of concern. You attribute that to both your bodies’ natural lubrication. Still, even with the ache, or perhaps because of it, you feel a deep arousal, a deep want for more, more, more.

He doesn’t wait for you to give the okay before he begins thrusting. You yelp as he sets a surprisingly quick pace. Your hands claw at his back in an attempt to orient yourself. He’s not even being that rough, just quick, but with his size still stretching you and the ridges grinding against your sweet spot when he draws back and slips back in, trying to focus on one thing or another is already a little overstimulating.

He buries himself to the hilt, and you’re embarrassed at the loud, high pitched sound that rips out of your throat when you feel him shudder inside you. He laughs, and his tone seems almost mocking as he draws back, slams back inside, and does it again to hear you squeal and feel you shudder. He leans down, pressing his fluffy chest against your soft chest, so he can really see every little reaction to his little trick.

“S-Stop teasing!” you cry out when he does it a third time.

“This is the most effective way for me to– ngh… do this,” he tells you through a clenched grin. “I can only do it in quick bursts, not continuously.” To emphasize his point, he does it a fourth and fifth time, relishing in the feeling of your walls clamping down around him. “Do you want me to stop?”

He does it a sixth time, and you try to shoot him a glare, but with how smug he looks about it and how you imagine you look right now, it has no effect on him. You just pull him in closer, nuzzling your face into his neck fluff to hide your face. He does it one last time before he returns to his regular thrusting, making you moan in pleasure and relief.

Your fingers brush against his wings, and he stills for a moment, his breath hitching. It gives you an idea. When he starts up his tempo again, you rub along the scales where his wings connect to his back. He shudders against you, and his voice pitches slightly higher. He immediately stops moving, looking down at you with his shining red eyes. You offer a smug smile, but your lack of confidence is very evident. He chuckles.

His hand moves up your thigh and his thumb finds your clit. Your hips buck when he begins to rub it in quick circles, and that’s when he slams down to the hilt and you feel his cock’s vibrations again. This time, he stays buried inside you, his cock vibrating in shorter, but more frequent bursts. You cry out, the heat in your core quickly growing too much for you to handle.

“Wait, w-wait, stop!”

“Why should I?”

You sob as he presses as flush against you as he can, somehow reaching even deeper, rubbing and buzzing against your sweet spot even more. You try to move away, but his other hand holds you in place. “T-Too much,” you tell him, voice cracking as he continues to quiver inside you. “I-I’m gonna cum if you keep– hah!”

“No one’s stopping you,” he teases, “so feel free to let yourself go.”

You try to hold yourself together, but that’s when he starts rocking into you while he’s already so deep inside you, when he keeps convulsing inside you and starts rubbing your clit faster. You feel tears welling up in your eyes as you shudder and claw at his back desperately, unable to hold your moans. 

Your back arches obscenely and your hips buck when the moth man pushes you past your limit into climax. You imagine your debauched cries can be heard throughout the forest, but the white hot pleasure shooting through your nerves makes you unable to care.

You’re not even through the first waves of your orgasm when he starts thrusting into you again, making you actually start crying out as overstimulated tears slip out of your eyes. He’s at least let up on the vibrations and rubbing, but his cock is too much when you’re still reeling from the overwhelming pleasure.

“My turn,” he grunts out before you can ask what the hell he’s doing. You wouldn’t have been able to ask anyways, as each thrust knocks the wind out of you, building up your next orgasm quicker and quicker while you’re still riding out your first. You want him to stop, to slow down, to keep fucking going because you’re never going to feel this good ever again with a human cock and you need to sear this into your memory.

He lurches forward, and his sharp teeth clamp down onto your shoulder. You scream, and he slams hard into you as your eyes roll back with your second climax. You whine, the sound almost pathetic, as you feel warmth flood your core. He holds you still so he doesn’t slip out, but there’s still so much that his seed leaks out anyways.

In the stillness, you can finally get some air in your lungs as you pant. You feel the moth man pull his teeth from your shoulder, his tongue lapping at the blood. You feel your body going limp, only to tense up again and sob when you feel another burst of movement inside you.

“I hope you didn’t think that’s all it would take,” he goads, lifting his head to meet your gaze. Red stains the corners of his lips. “I don’t often get the opportunity to mate, so I intend on properly breeding you while I still have you here.”

You swallow nervously, butterflies fluttering in your stomach. You don’t hate the idea, Archons no, but at this rate, you’re going to be fucked too stupid to think of an excuse for what happened here when you return to the Akademiya. Would they even believe you if you said you had sex with the giant moth in the forest.

Another shudder snaps you out of the last rational thought you’re going to have before you return, and you simply brace yourself for more.

[tinydeskwriter]

Training Season| Häkkinen!driver!reader

A/N: so this has being in my drafts since January, after Hamilton announcement, the calendar is a little off because I used the 2023 calendar when writing, but I would like to point out that I wrote that Lando has three podiums with Charles and Max and finishes second in the Championship. Also I had big hopes for Williams this year, I know, but hope is a fools gold so... sue me. This is kind of a super rookie scenario where she can be a beddie even in a Williams.

ships: I am not sure yet... It can either be Landoxreader or Charlesxreader, I was unsure even when writing...

Y/n Häkkinen was signed by Williams for the 24’ season, taking the seat previously owned by Sergeant. The young Monegasque driver was the 2023 F2 champion and 2022 F3 champion, the daughter of double-World Champion, Mika Häkkinen, her seat at the team came backed by some big sponsors—sponsors that had supported her career since the early days.

She’s also the first woman on the grid since Giovanna Amati in the 90’s, which in itself brings a lot of attention to the team.

Williams is the gateway for her to prove herself to the world.

The door that no other team would have opened for an untested female rookie.

Their 2024 car is ok-ish, good, but not really great. Yet, it does not stop her from overtaking several drivers with better cars and far more years on the grid than her.

She bulldozes her way on each track from the get-go, driving in a level far above her paycheck and far beyond her years of experience, leaving her own teammate and stronger teams in her wake.

She does not win her first race.

She never expected to do so in a Williams, however she does end up in the podium, below Norris and Verstappen. Though she’s not the day’s winner, the reporters seem far more interested in the only girl on grid pushing her Williams to a third place than in Red Bull’s three times World Champion or McLaren’s golden boy.

She’s the first women to ever put foot on a F1 podium—and on her very first race too.

Y/n Hakkinen is history in the making, a bold French journalist states.

One that the press finds a lot more interesting and appealing than the 7 times world champion that does not seem anywhere near his eighth title, or the current one, who can’t stop winning, until now.

Her second race, Jeddah, is another show of great skill, another podium, she finishes the race once again on third place. Scoring in just two races more points than Williams scored the whole of the last season.

In Australia she takes second.

When it comes to the comparisons, her rookie year can only be compared to Hamilton, she demonstrates the same prodigious talent on the track that the seven-time champion did in 2007, with the added mystic of doing so in a midfield car—she eventually breaks a few of his records, most consecutive podium finishes and most points in a debut, but she does not bet his record of most wins in a debut season.

Though she admits that Hamilton is one of her F1 idols she does not accept to be called the next Hamilton, “It is 2024, we should stop comparing people, I am not the next anybody, I am the first and only Y/n Häkkinen, thank you.”

There is no denying that she’s popular with the public, who find the quiet Monegasque who sings in her radio during races quite endearing.

She warm and inviting to the public and with fans, however, does not get closer with the other drivers until after her first win.

It is in Imola, the seventh race of the season.

She had developed a bit of an arrogant/cocky reputation with the lack of interaction with the rest of the grid—not even with her own teammate—and monosyllabic answers to the press.

At Ferrari’s home race she qualified third, behind Leclerc and Norris. On race day Sainz DNS’s, Verstappen has trouble with his car from the beginning and DNF’s and Russell crashes against the barrier taking out Alonso and Piastri.

Y/n/n overtakes Leclerc on the 22nd lap, and after some battling from the older Monegasque to regain position, she proceeds to lead the remaining of the race until the finish line, sharing the podium with Ferrari and McLaren, leaving the world speechless.

A Williams beating a Ferrari…in Imola.

She has a celebratory dinner with the team, picking up the bill and thanking everyone for the hard work, apologizes for sometimes being so closed and difficult to approach and promises to do better. Alex finally breaks his teammate's out of her shell, after only seven races, the two have a long—first conversation—during dinner, the Monegasque confesses that she kept her distance because she never got along with teammates, they always end up resenting her for winning—God forbids a girl winning in Formula.

The dinner ends up with Alex and Lily dragging her to a nightclub to meet with a few of the other drivers—who were celebrating Leclerc and Norris podium.

Most seemed shocked by her arriving alongside the couple—and the fact that she was dressed in something that didn't have the Williams logo in it—overall, after the initial chock, everyone was surprisingly welcoming. It surprises everyone that Y/n/n, is far from being the Ice Queen portrayed by the media, with monosyllabic answers and cold glares—she earns some points when as the winner of the day she puts her card on the bar to pay for drinks.

She gives as good as she gets to Pierre’s natural flirting, amusing everyone around, declares herself in love with Kika and Lily—Oscar’s girl—after half an hour talking about fashion. She sings with Yuki on top of her lungs, dances with Lando and Arthur and drinks them both under the table. At the end of the night leaves the club between George and Charles, the two most sober ones of the group, Albon's blazer jacket around her shoulders and a pair of sunglasses she doesn't remember who she got from covering her eyes.

Photos of the night appear all over the internet in gossip pages, there is speculation and some amount of hate in her comment section bellow her photos on Instagram, and although none of those involved or their teams comment on anything, it becomes clear in the following races that it was nothing more than a bonding moment between the rookie and the other drivers on the grid.

Being social does not affect her performance on track, she comes in seventh in Monaco after tire problems, fifth in Austria, and takes her second win in Silverstone.

For the first time in years, it seems like Williams Racing has a shot at the Championship, surprising all—though it is undeniable that the public loves an underdog by the growing number of Williams fans at each race wearing caps with the number eight and the soaring numbers on Y/n social medias.

It is after Silverstone that the other teams start to approach her about her next season, eager to bring her to the front row after she showed what she’s capable of with a Williams.

“I have yet to think about my future, as of now, I am focused on do my best with Williams.” She says during the press conference after avoiding several questions of the same content. “Deciding where I will be next season is something I have to do with a very cool head, without getting carried away by sentimentality. Like many drivers here, I have many dreams, but my main goal is to win. That's the only answer I'll give on the matter."

The press quickly catches on in the ‘bidding war’ amongst the teams for the hot commodity that is the prodigious young Monegasque.

Not to say that every race is perfect. Y/n/n is a consistent driver, but sometimes crashes are beyond her own control. Ocon crashed on her in Baku ending her race on the 15th lap, and at Spa she is unable to avoid crashing into Pierre after being hit by George and Zhou.

After several rollovers, Y/n/n ends up upside down, the driver is quick to turn off the engine, but it doesn't take long to notice that she has no radio and probably has a sprained wrist, which leaves her unable to get out of the car on her own.

She felt like a lifetime, when it barely took more than two minutes for Pierre and George to get to her—their own crash site not being far—and help her slide out of what is left of her car. Y/n watches the rest of the race from the medical unit, but she is there for the podium, with her wrist bandaged, smiling and cheering Lando third win of the season, a podium once again shared with Charles and Max.

Zandvoort is good, but not half as good as Y/n/n would have liked, it was almost a month in between Belgium and Netherlands, and her wrist is fully healed she had no excuse for not doing better.

After personally meeting with Toto Wolff in Monaco during the break for talks about taking a seat at Mercedes, the last think she wants is to underperform. She had other offers. But she won't be Verstappen's second at Red Bull, and she won't carry Stroll on her back at Aston Martin, much less wait two years for Audi debut in 26’, she’s too hungry for wins to wait.

It is after taking second place in Monza, that Y/n gives the go ahead so that her manager—her father—starts negotiating a contract with Mercedes.

Car issues stresses her out in Singapore and Suzuka. But she's more of a social butterfly as the season starts to come to an end.   

By the time Interlagos arrives her contract with Mercedes in signed, securing a seat for her in 2025.

In Abu Dhabi, the last race of the calendar, she has her father by her side—and her older brothers, who did not attend for most of the season due to their own careers, are present. It's easy to see how important the three men are to Y/n—although she races with her father's surname, and the same number as he did, she does so under the Monegasque flag instead of the Finnish.

They say that when your career is soaring, your love life does not exist, and it couldn't be truer for her.

Her rookie year is one for the motorsport history books.

Y/n signs a Netflix deal for a Drive to Survive’ spin-off focused on women in motorsport and her own career. Brands she always admired reach out for endorsement deals and ambassadorship.

However, she never knows if a guy is interested in her or the privileges of dating a Formula One driver.

She did not take part in the podium at Yas Marina, yet her final position at the parc fermé kept her with just enough points to finish the Championship in third place.

Max is once again the World Champion, but different from previous years, it was not without sweat, this time it was a tough competition with Lando in his McLaren and the points difference between the first and second is tight.

To end the year on a high note, Y/n/n presents the entire Williams team with gift baskets, a kind of thank you and farewell gift, even though no one would know that she signed with Mercedes for a few more days. All the drivers receive a gift from her during Secret Santa, nothing too extravagant, she still feels shy about giving them a gift.

The announcement of Y/n/n's signing with Mercedes comes hours before the FIA Prize Giving Ceremony, it is posted with a photo of Y/n on George's right, both in Tommy Hilfinger apparel, Toto in the middle just a little behind his young drivers—looking every bit like a Ralph Lauren dad, proud of his preppy children, as a user on X pointed out.

It shocks everyone who thought that Toto had his eyes on Alonso or young Kimi Antonelli from Formula Two—even Ocon had shown up on the betting pool.

The ceremony happens in Abu Dhabi due to the last race of the year being near mid-December. Y/n arrives solo in a custom-made midnight blue Dior gown, glimmering in Cartier diamonds and blood-red lips, she was the focus of every flash on the red carpet with a thousand questions thrown her way, she smiles and waves and dodges questions like a pro.

She ends the night with three prizes, 3rd place in the World Championship, Rookie of the Year and Action of the Year—for that phenomenal overtake on Leclerc in Imola.  

“How did you managed? It was a Williams against a Ferrari!” The presenter asked her impressed once the driver joins the stage.

“Big balls.” She jokes, sending the room in an uproar. “On a serious note, Leclerc is an amazing driver, it was tough, he hunted me down all the way to the finish line, winning when going against your idols, the people that inspire you, that you look up to, it is an amazing feeling, especially when their cars were much superior to your own.”

Y/n/n cracks another joke on stage after receiving the crystal trophy as she was seated beside Lando during the ceremony—and the internet can’t get enough of the screenshots from the broadcast of the two drivers talking and giggling, with Verstappen looking sternly at them for their shenanigans before smiling.

A/n: share your thoughts!

[wannabespiderman]

Man vs machine

Hello! This is my first fanfic written in English so I'm slightly nervous to post this but I couldn't get this idea out of my head so... I hope you enjoy :)

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Just an old man confused about modern technology.

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You were walking past the living room door when a discontented grunt caught your attention. You took two steps back to crane your neck past the half-closed door. Bucky was sitting on the sofa, leaning over the living room table, which looked like a toddler’s table compared to him, his face illuminated by the bright screen of his new laptop that you’ve bought him not too long ago. His eyebrows were tightly knit together when he mumbled a quiet curse. You turned around, a curious expression on your face as you walked through the door.

"You okay, baby?" you asked and promptly sat down next to him. Bucky gave you an inscrutable look before turning his eyes back to the screen. “Where the hell do I find my emails?” he asked in frustration. A sudden laugh escaped you. You should have realized that a 106 year old man who had little to do with electronics would have some trouble with a laptop. Bucky gave you a displeased look with a slight, unconcious pout appearing on his face. “Click on the internet icon.” You spoke softly, willing to help. Bucky’s brow furrowed. “I don’t need the internet, I need my emails.” You stayed silent for a moment, slightly baffled by his words. Just last week you took the effort to set up a Google account with him and you were pretty sure he had paid attention then. “Bucky.” You said an amused huff escaping you. “Your e-mail is connected to the Internet. Just click on the icon.” Bucky clicked his tongue in annoyance to cover his slight embarrassment and went back to staring at the desktop. He was definitely taking his time, and at one point you doubted he knew what an icon was. “Need any help?” you asked as kindly as you could, though the sight of Bucky squinting his eyes like a real old man made your voice sound rather amused. With an exhausted sigh, Bucky leaned back against the seat back and rubbed his face, his shoulders visibly slumping. “You do it.”

You snort, but immediately apologize after he gives you an exceptionally grumpy look. “You can do it.” You said encouragingly, giving him a small smile. Bucky rolled his eyes, but relented and bent over the laptop again. You shuffled closer to it so you could see the screen properly, and the little orange and blue Firefox icon literally jumped out at you. You pointed your finger at it and looked at it again. “Just click on this one.”

You tried to be patient with him, really, and actually he did exactly what you said, but you couldn’t hold back the little sigh that left your mouth as he moved the cursor over the Firefox icon and clicked. Once. “Okay.” You mumbled, rubbing your eye. Apparently, you needed to be more specific. "This time you click twice." Another brief but piercing look from Bucky before he actually double-clicked and the browser opened. You sent a quick thank you to the heavens before instructing him to type the url into the search tab and cringed silently when he started typing with both of his pointer fingers. Right this second you decided to teach him how to properly type with all ten of his fingers later. A few more instructions later, probably a little more than usually necessary, he reached the Google log-in site.

“I assume you can handle the rest?” It was supposed to be a statement but your voice shifted into a question at the end.

He hummed quietly in affirmation, though his brow was still furrowed as if this whole thing was incredibly complicated which, to be honest… it probably was for him. You pressed your lips together, a slight sting of guilt coursing through you, your previous amusement and frustration about his hardship completely vanishing. One second you were quietly sat next to him and the other you had your arms wrapped around his bicep and your head leaning on his shoulder. “I’m sorry about laughing earlier.” You whispered, almost too quiet for him to understand if he weren’t a Super-Soldier and had enhanced hearing. “I know it’s new for you.” Bucky tried to shrug it off but you saw how his eyes softened when he tilted his head to look down at you. A sudden, quiet chuckle escaped him, making you quirk an eyebrow in curiosity.

“You’d think, as a Cyborg, I’d be better at this.”

[ode2cheol]

i want to spend this whole night with you ..

doctor!seungcheol x reader 4.3k words, fluff, minor angst, some jealousy, reader has a broken ankle, this is probably incredibly inaccurate.. based off the one week i spent doing work experience at a hospital, part of waves will take us far away series !

when you’d managed to wind up in the hospital for breaking your arm you were dreading it more than anything, that is until you were assigned to the young doctor who found you too pretty to ignore.

“mom i told you it’s fine. it’s probably just a little sprain it’s been worse before” there was honestly no point in trying to reason with your mother over the phone like this, you know she’d never give in.

you had to admit it did warm your heart hearing the concern in your mother’s voice, but not enough to convince you to head to the hospital. yes, your ankle felt like it was two minutes away from practically falling off of your limbs but you would’ve rather that than spend the next week in the hospital and the next few months having to go to regular check-ups.

“honey, nothing is going to happen to you at the hospital, please stop being paranoid. look, if you leave it any longer your it’ll probably get worse, you’re better off getting it done with now”

she had a point. if you put this off you might wind up having to stay there even longer. a deep breath escaped you as you nodded to yourself, “alright sure i’ll head to the hospital then”

limping as you got out of the taxi and through the hospital doors, you cringed at both the pain and the chemical scent of artificial fragrances hitting your nose. you rubbed the hand sanitizer into your hand while you both stood in a queue for the receptionist desk. two minutes and you already want to go home. great.

“yes, how can i help you?” the receptionist smiled at you, fingers already getting ready to search your name in the system.

“uh hi i booked an appointment for a sprained ankle” you told her handing over your ID.

the receptionist scanned it for a few seconds, the quick clicking of the keys catching you a little off guard. after you’d confirmed the details for her she handed you a small note with the room and doctor name.

you limped walked down the hospital wards, wincing while you searched for the room you were supposed to be in. the hospital was a lot busier today- at least compared to the last time you visited. to be fair that was at least two years ago so you wouldn’t know if this was considered busy anymore.

double checking the room number, you knocked the door pushing it open when, you’re assuming, dr lee let you in. he gave you a cheerful smile, motioning you to the seat while he took his own behind the computer.

“hi miss yn, you said you were here for a sprained ankle?” he waited for your nod, “no problem we just need to run a few tests to see how bad it is, if you’re fine you can be on your way within the hour”

the thought immediately lifted your mood. you spent the next few minutes going through the tests with dr lee, wincing whenever he touched a certain part of your ankle, feeling bad whenever he apologised profusely. he looked confused for a few seconds, checking back on the notes he was given on you, “miss, i’m afraid this isn’t a sprained ankle. from the looks of it i think it may be fractured, we’re going to have to run an x-ray”

he left the room for a few minutes to get everything for the x-ray ready, giving you a few minutes to wallow in your self pity. ‘great it just had to be fractured. walking around on it couldn’t have helped either..’

when dr lee returned he returned with someone else. you scanned his jacket for a name tag eyes relaxing as they set on the ‘dr choi’ in all caps.

‘dr choi’ smiled widely at you before shaking your hand, “hi i’m dr choi, unfortunately dr lee is being called in for something else so i’ll be taking over your x-ray if that’s fine with you?”

oh it was definitely fine with you.

you nodded, turning your head so you could focus on the clock rather than dr choi’s far too perfect face.

the x-rays technically went pretty quick but getting them done felt like hours. dr choi and his stupid too handsome face- “yn? yn you there?” your eyes went wide when you saw dr choi’s face only a few inches away from your own, apparently he’d been trying to get your attention for 30 seconds.

“you’ll have to wait about a half hour until the results come through so for now how about you just keep that ankle raised, alright? i’ll be here finishing your paperwork so if anything starts hurting a lot out of nowhere let me know. oh and i might need to be asking you a few questions too”

“oh that’s fine and thank you” you nodded as he smiled at you, wheeling his chair to the computer and loading up your file. the room was silent for a few minutes so you took it as an opportunity to text back your mom, assuring her everything was fine and that the doctor wouldn’t have to amputate your leg.

“so you thought it was a sprain?” dr choi’s deep voice cut through the silence making you sit up slightly as you answered him.

“oh yeah. it was pretty swollen and when i’d read up on it all i saw was that swelling was usually a sign of a sprain, thought it wasn’t too big a deal” you shrugged your shoulders. you saw an expression flick on seungcheol’s face for a split second; he looked- annoyed?

“if something like this happens again yn please don’t wait until the end to come here” he looked so serious. after seeing his intimidating stare, you wouldn’t have been able to say no if you wanted to.

“you sure you just don’t want to see me more often, dr choi?” you teased in hopes it would lighten the mood. as soon as the words left your mouth though you regretted it- what if you’d crossed a line? surely a doctor doesn’t want to flirt with a patient.

much to your surprise however, the young doctor only shot you a smile before speaking “since we’re probably going to be seeing each other often why don’t you just get used to calling me seungcheol?”

heat rose to your cheeks, dr choi- seungcheol, never wiping the grin off of his face. he only turned back to the computer after you nodded.

“how did you manage to do that to it anyway?” it took you a few seconds to register his question was referring to your ankle but you couldn’t stop yourself growing embarrassed when dwelling back on the memory.

“i uh..” you trailed off, looking to the side. why were you so nervous? you’d easily told anyone else so why were you embarrassed telling seungcheol. “just a little accident, i fell trying to reach something”

seungcheol looked at you unamused and you’d wished you had told him something else, now you just look like an idiot in front of him.

“when did that happen exactly?”

“uh about a week ago? something like that”

“you just walked on your ankle normally for a week?” you looked flustered at his tone, “well no wonder it ended up getting worse. if something like that happens yn you should at least book an appointment with your doctor if you don’t want to head here”

the way he talked to you, it sounded he was so caring. suppose that’s what you need as a doctor. still, even if it was part of his job, you couldn’t help the way he made your heart beat a little faster and cheeks grow a little warmer.

“sorry. the hospital just intimidates me so i guess i was just hoping even if it was a little sprain it’ll heal on its own as long as i don’t put too much pressure on it”

seungcheol nodded at your words, getting something from the desk before turning back to the computer. you could see now that he had a pair of glasses resting on his nose bridge, you hate to admit it but it made him look even cuter than before.

“oh you need glasses?” why did you ask him that? that’s such a stupid thing to ask.

“hm? oh these? nah they’re just blue light glasses” he said with a small smile, continuing his work.

you’d spent the rest of the half hour scrolling on your phone and texting your friends about where you were. your friend jeonghan promising you a bouquet of flowers from the shop when he comes to visit you. you didn’t mention the cute doctor you had that you definitely did not have a crush on. it was just attraction, that’s totally normal.

“oh your x-ray results are back” seungcheol told you, picking it up from the printer and wheeling his chair over to the bed you were on. “alright so it’s definitely a fracture and luckily for you, it’s not too serious. as you can see there only one bone cracked which means you most likely won’t be needing surgery. but considering how reckless you are, we’ll be giving you a cast and i’ll check to see if you can approved for crutches too”

despite all this information there was only one thing you really wanted to know. “so when can i go home?”

seungcheol let out a sigh, “after we get the cast on you and get the okay for the crutches. i’ll send the request in now should take about an hour or two, alright?”

“yeah that’s fine”

it’d been about twenty minutes since you’d gotten the cast on and you can already feel it start to annoy you. this was going to make your life hell for the next- wait how long do you have to wear this thing?

you looked over to seungcheol who was still busy at work, you really did not want to bother him. but then again he did say that you could ask him anything and it’d be fine.

“hey seungcheol?” he turned his head toward you humming, “i was just wondering how long i need to keep this thing on for”

he turned his body completely toward you, “there’s no guaranteed date, usually it takes around 6-8 weeks to heal on its own but it depends on everyone’s own body and how well you take care of it” a teasing lilt in his voice as he told you the last part.

“very funny” you jokingly rolled you eyes at him.

“it’s not my fault you couldn’t take care of yourself” he chuckled, spinning his chair around to continue sorting through his files.

eventually you could feel yourself growing more and more tired and before you knew it, you were out cold.

when you woke up there was a blanket covering your frame, the room being illuminated by the small desk lamp and seungcheol’s computer. you groaned a little, stretching your limbs as you rose from your nap. just how long had you been sleeping?

seungcheol heard you and realised you’d woken up, he stood and walked toward you. “sleep well?”

you laughed a little, “yeah i did, what time is it by the way my phones dead” you told him waving your phone that had the red battery sign on it.

“pass it to me, i have a charger you can use it. also it’s uhhh” he looked over at his watch, “just a little past midnight”

“midnight? oh wow how long was that nap” you laughed lightly. “alright well i should get going then”

“do you have a ride?” seungcheol eyed you cautiously.

“after my phone’s done charging i can call jeonghan he usually stays up late” you said more to yourself then to seungcheol.

“yoon jeonghan?”

“yeah.. you know him too?”

seungcheol cleared his throat, “we met a couple months ago. he’s a florist right? we usually get a lot of bouquets from his shop and he’ll sometimes stick around after delivering them. i can call him for you if you don’t wanna wait for your phone to finish charging”

you nodded and mumbled a ‘thanks’ when he handed you his phone. on the fourth ring jeonghan picked up.

“hello? seungcheol you’re up at this hour? usually you’re in bed at 10pm sharp” you heard your friend on the other side of the call.

“jeonghan it’s me”

“yn? what’ve you got seungcheol’s phone for? are you two..?” he trailed off at the end and you knew exactly what he was implying.

“no you idiot. my phones dead and i’m still at the hospital, think you can come pick me up?”

“oh yeah sure. you feeling any better?”

“yeah thanks, text either of us when you’re here okay? bye” you pressed the red hang up sign, handing the phone back to seungcheol.

ten minutes later, jeonghan had texted you that he was waiting outside, reception wouldn’t let him in at this hour. with seungcheol’s help you got to the parking lot, jeonghan parking closest to the entrance so that you wouldn’t have to walk too much.

“i’ll see you again in a week” seungcheol waved you off with a smile.

“see you later, dr choi” you teased him.

when you were completely buckled up in jeonghan’s car and he’d finally left the hospital parking lot he finally asked you what he’d been dying to know for the last fifteen minutes.

“so you and cheol?” he asked you, and you could hear the smirk in his voice.

“he’s just my doctor calm down. i’m not going to try making a move on my doctor” you giggled, “he was pretty cool though.. i guess” you started out the window, trying to desperately fight back the smile when the thoughts of seungcheol flooded your mind.

“oh yeah you’re gone for him already” jeonghan laughed.

“it’s been a day! i couldn’t possibly like him that much after a few hours come on jeonghan i’m not that bad”

“i don’t know, i wouldn’t be so sure. i mean it’s not like you’re the only one who feels like that. cheol could’ve woken you up and went home but he didn’t. he worked overtime to make sure you were alright”

“okay now you’re just being crazy. he probably had his own work to do. what kind of guy would do that for some random person they met two hours before?” you scoffed, throwing him a questioning look.

he shrugged, “i’m just saying what i’ve observed”

you shook your head, remembering what seungcheol had told you, “wait why do you stick around the hospital so much? even after delivering the orders?”

“oh that..” jeonghan was.. blushing? you’ve known him since you were ten and you don’t think you’ve ever seen him blushing, “i’m uh.. friends with one of the surgeons. i usually stick around talking to her and then met cheol and shua. but enough about me what’d they say about your ankle?”

“hm? oh yeah they said it usually takes around 6 weeks to heal, maybe even two months. just gotta be careful with it now that it’s in the cast”

four weeks later you'd returned to the hospital for your checkup, an extra pip in your step despite the crutches. you’d been having regular weekly checkups with seungcheol ever since that day and you enjoy the time spent with him more than anything. the hospital was done up nicely today, decorations everywhere in time for valentine’s day.

your ankle was heeling up nicely, so you’ve been told. if it kept up how it was you’d definitely be out of the cast at the six week mark. when you reached seungcheol’s door you knocked on it a few times before he opened it for you with a smile.

“my favourite patient, how’ve you been? ankle not giving you any new trouble right?” he told you as he helped you up on the bed.

“i’ve been good thanks and no, it’s been the same” you returned his wide grin. it was a long shot but you were secretly hoping he’d do something for valentine’s day. you guys had spent the last few weeks subtly flirting and the chemistry between you both was undeniable.

the checkup went smoothly as usual and seungcheol assured you that you were on a steady path to being completely recovered. as you were about to leave you saw dr hong waiting outside the door, holding a.. bouquet of red roses? seungcheol let him in and took the roses from him.

“jeonghan just left these for you, said you ordered them?” dr hong told him, smiling at you.

“thanks shua” he sighed.

you didn’t want to invade his privacy but you couldn’t help the way that the ‘to you’ card just happened to be right in front of your face. you wished it wasn’t though after seeing who the flowers were really for.

you felt a knot forming in your throat and cleared your throat, “uh i’ll see you next week doctor” you smiled at him tight lipped, not waiting for his response before you headed out the door.

jeonghan was probably around and could’ve given you a ride but you don’t think you could last in a car ride with him. he was far too good at reading emotions and would he able to tell somethings up with you in a minute.

sighing, you opened up the app for an uber and waited in the hospital cafe until you got the notification it was here. the entire car ride you tried your hardest to not think about seungcheol and how sweet he was to you, and definitely not about how the flowers he bought were for someone else and not you.

it’d been a week since your last appointment with seungcheol, and a week after valentines. you felt so stupid and so disgusted at yourself. this entire time you’d been shamelessly flirting with someone who couldn’t want less to do with you. someone who already had a girlfriend that he was buying a bouquet of red roses for.

you had an appointment tomorrow and you weren’t sure how you were going to face seungcheol, it was way too embarrassing to even think about. sighing, you picked up your keys before deciding to go out on a walk. there was a spot you always came to whenever you felt like this. it was past a little public trail near a few fields, everything always felt so calm there.

the only problem was that getting there was usually difficult even when you didn’t have a cast on your leg. it was bound to be even worse now. regardless, you started walking down the trail anyway, trying your hardest to avoid stepping into the dips in the ground too harshly. however careful you were though, the path was too randomly uneven so you couldn’t avoid harshly coming down on one. and it just had to be on your injured leg.

a sharp pain shooting through your ankle as you winced in pain. you sat on some of the grass near the trail and tried keeping your leg as elevated as you could. even if you could get the pain to alleviate, you were still only halfway down the path and trying to go the full way was far too risky. sighing, you stood again to head back home instead, limping and wincing whenever your foot hit the ground a little hard.

eventually the pain was too much so you needed to take a break. even if you could get someone to pick you up, you’d still need to get through this trail to head back to where cars were able to drive anyway.

you stood again continuing your journey back until you heard someone call your name from behind. that can’t be..?

“yn! just because i said your ankle was healing well does not mean you can pull something like this! are you crazy?” seungcheol told you, trying his best to not get mad but you could still tell he was frustrated. “what were you even here for?”

“i just wanted to get to that field” you scoffed, “surprised you even care” you muttered the last part.

“excuse me?” seungcheol looked at you intently.

“whatever, i don’t need to explain myself to you”

“yn i’m your doctor-”

“not right now. right now you’re not working so you’re just choi seungcheol” you told him pointedly.

“yn why are you being like this? did something happen?” seungcheol told asked you hesitantly.

you put some distance between the two of you, “it’s not like i need to tell you any of this. we’re not friends and you’re not my boyfriend, so please do not pretend like you care” you hated how your voice cracked slightly, tears welling up in your eyes. “besides i don’t think your girlfriend would really appreciate this so it’s better i just leave”

before you could leave you felt a strong hand gripping your forearm bringing you back toward him, “what the hell are you talking about? what girlfriend?”

if you hadn’t seen the evidence yourself you would’ve believed him considering how convincing his confused face looks.

“yn listen to me, i don’t even have a girlfriend, if i did i would not have the spent the last month thinking of ways to ask you out after your ankle was fine”

“huh? but- but i saw it! that day- with the flowers! they said to-”

“yn those were for my brother..” he interrupted you, amusement pulling at his features.

“you’re asking out your brother?” you shouted.

“no you idiot! ew! let me explain. my brother needed to get his girlfriend flowers for valentines and i told him about jeonghan. so he asked me to pick them up for him” seungcheol laughed lightly, holding your shoulders so that you knew not to interrupt him halfway through.

“oh.. well- any normal person would assume you were getting those for your own girlfriend!” you pouted trying to turn away from his teasing smirk.

“i don’t really understand why you were jealous though.. hmm” he put his finger on his chin sarcastically. he knew exactly why but still wanted to tease you for it, “oh! unless you’re jealous”

you groaned, covering your face before seungcheol pried your hands away. his gaze on you was too much at once so you turned away attempting to walk away. you’d forgotten where you were though so your foot slipped hard on a whole in the ground again.

“shit- we need to get you back to the hospital. can’t let you walk this whole way though..” you saw seungcheol think about it for a few seconds before he knelt down on the ground in front on you, “get on my back, i’ll carry you back and then you’re headed straight to the hospital, i’ll drop you off”

“are you sure?”

“yes now hurry. can’t believe you were willing to break your leg over something as petty as this” he scoffed jokingly as he made sure you were secure on his back.

it took about twenty minutes to get to the hospital and after they ran all the tests it was decided it was best for you to stay overnight. this time you weren’t in seungcheol’s usual office but one in the emergency ward. you didn’t like this one bit.

when seungcheol walked in he smiled when he met your gaze, “hey, everything alright?”

“well all things considered it’s not too bad i guess” you said sarcastically drawing a laugh out of seungcheol.

“yeah well i didn’t ask you to make the injury worse, did i?”

you stayed quiet for a few seconds, “hey cheol, they won’t need to do a surgery right?”

seungcheol could see the nerves on your face and part of him felt so guilty for finding the pout on your face so cute.

“don’t worry about that pretty, you didn’t manage to break another bone, you just undid some of what was already healed. it’ll take a couple extra weeks to heal that’s it” he said, rubbing his hand over your head to provide comfort to your clearly distressed figure.

there was one more thing you needed to know“and about us-”

“do you really want me to confess to you in a stinky hospital room?” he laughed, “i had a whole plan in mind but now i gotta postpone it because little miss wants to have a broken leg decided she wants to stay in a cast even longer”

“alright, but if you’re making me wait longer it better be good” you tried threatening him, fighting back your giggles.

“get some rest yn, jeonghan said a couple of your friends are visiting tomorrow. sleep well, i’ll be here if you need anything”

during visiting hours the next day you saw seungcheol was right, your friends really did visit you; albeit your best friend was late because she got lost and had to have joshua escort her over.

“oh it feels so good to finally have that thing off” you sighed, “it felt so suffocating after a while i was starting to forget what my leg felt like”

“yeah well make sure you don’t wind up here again or else you might end up in something worse than a cast” seungcheol half heartedly scolded, “try twisting it around. if it feels alright take a couple steps so we can just be completely sure, yeah?”

you did as seungcheol asked more than glad to say everything felt fine and back to normal. you laughed happily, smiling at him when he said you were officially healed and wouldn’t need to keep the cast on.

you wanted to hug him but something stopped you, a twinge of excitement in your eyes when you cleared your throat ready to ask seungcheol, “so about that confession you promised me..”

he chuckled moving closer to you, both of you mirroring each other’s wide grins, “yn. would you like to have dinner with me tonight? i’ll tell you all about my feelings then”

“i would love to” you giggled, finally hugging him.

[angellesword]

BAGGAGE | JJK (07)

Summary: Drowning in debt and blood, Jeon Jungkook knows he's better off alone, lest he brings people down with him.

But one drunken night changes everything.

In a blink of an eye, Jungkook found himself drowning not only in debt and blood, but also in dirty diapers and judgmental stares from you, a.k.a his long-lost love and the guardian of the son he didn't even know existed.

Genre and warnings: best friends to lovers, co-parenting, idiots in love, mutual pining, angst, fluff, implied smut, kissing, minor character death, slight getting back together, drama, OC cusses excessively so watch out, blood, pregnancy, discussion of abortion, giving birth

Pairing: dad! Jungkook x adoptive mom!Reader

Word Count: 6.1k

← Previous Chapter (06) | Next Chapter (08) →

****

Six Years Ago, 2017:

France was not all that you expected. One would think people pursuing their doctorate degrees would be busier with their academic lives, but it looked like French people cared more about their social lives.

"Come on, just a few more steps!" Elyna, your classmate, chuckled while dragging your warm, sweaty body across the street. She almost tasted victory when she got a glimpse of the façade of your apartment.

Admittedly, Elyna still gets jealous whenever she remembers your apartment being nicer than hers. Talk about favoritism, huh? You were both scholars of Sorbonne University pursuing your doctorate degrees, but Professor Verlaine liked you the most.

"There you go! You can look after yourself, right? Bye, cutie." Elyna kissed your cheek before practically throwing you in your front door.

You were smaller in stature compared to your French classmates, making it easier for them to push and pull you around. You groaned when your back hit the door.

You were too drunk to cuss your classmate, so you could only suck it up and push yourself to enter your apartment. After what felt like forever, you finally stumbled inside, puffing out a breath and debating whether to just sleep on the floor.

Hours of clubbing with your classmates messed you up. You shouldn't have gone with them, but those shitty French didn't really give you a choice. Even Verlaine encouraged you to go out, going as far as postponing the submission of your business paper so you could have a fun Friday night.

Verlaine's exact words were, "Have fun. You've been in France for months already. You're the only international student who hasn't gone clubbing here."

You did not care for clubs. In fact, you hated them. You only attended your graduation parties and some quiet bars with Jungkook.

"Hah! Stupid pompous freak!" You cussed your traitor of a best friend, wanting nothing but to beat yourself for thinking about that bastard. You had done so well suppressing thoughts about Jungkook for the whole day. It's ten minutes before midnight. How could you fail so miserably?

You struggled to fish your phone out of your pocket, vision doubling, but that did not stop you from sending chains of messages to Jungkook.

To: Jungkook-shit I fucking hate you traitor

To: Jungkook-shit yoi betrayed me freak,. i hope you rot in hell

To: Jungkook-shit fucker

To: Jungkook-shit i hate you so mcuch pleas fo me a favor snd die

To: Jungkook-shit i will ndcevef dorgive you digshfit 

To: Jungkook-shit dick 

To: Jungkook-shit duck you

To: Jungkook-shit ny heart hirts

To: Jungkook-shitcan we go back?

The last message remained unsent as your intoxication finally caught up to you. You dropped your phone on the floor, face hitting the cold tiles as darkness clouded your vision.

You fell asleep.

***

That night, you had a long dream, which you were pretty sure had happened in real life—back when you were still very small, probably at five years old.

If you thought about it, you'd say the dream slash memory was triggered by going to a club with Elyna and the others. Your dream started off in a club, too.

Your Jisoo-unnie told you to hide in the closet and never make a sound, no matter who tried calling your name. You were an obedient child, only trusting your older sister. But it didn't mean your mother was as kind as Jisoo. Your mom would boss you around as she entertained guests. You basically served as an errand girl at a young age, forced to keep your mouth shut even when you saw your mother and the other girls get violently beaten up by rogue men.

"Where is my sister!?"

You were lighting heavy scented candles for your mother and client when you heard your sister's voice.

Your ears involuntarily perked up. You threw the matchbox aside and immediately ran out of the club's private room.

"Jisoo-unnie?" You blinked innocently.

Your sister was standing there, looking as if she was going to smack your mother. But Jisoo stopped when she heard you call for her.

"Don't take her away!" Your mother screeched and tried to pull Jisoo's hair.

Jisoo dodged, immediately running toward you and hugging your frail body. She covered your ears. "I will take her away! Please. Stop it! She’s just a kid!"

"Bah!" Your mother spat. "She earns me money, unlike a brat like you!"

"I will take her place." Jisoo did not even hesitate. She hugged you tighter. "Let me be your errand girl or whatever you want me to do. I will do it. Just leave her alone."

You couldn't properly hear what the adults were talking about. Jisoo covered your ear tighter to ensure you heard nothing. It took a while before your mother spat on the ground for the second time, but she relented and let Jisoo take you away.

Your memories were pretty vague. All you remembered was that Jisoo had brought you into a tiny apartment; it was cramped and dark and smelled like dead rats. But it was better than those heavy-scented rooms at the club. At least in here, Jisoo cared for you and did not try to beat you up.

It didn't mean all your trauma would go away instantly, though. There were many moments when you would wake up in the middle of the night, silently crying because of a nightmare. You usually dreamt about your mother's client beating up girls and throwing profanities at everyone, including you.

"It's okay, my little one. Your Jisoo-unnie is here, I'll protect you." You weren't sure if you were recalling memories of the past or if it was just part of your drunken dream. All you knew was that Jisoo's warm embrace was palpable. She used to cradle your little body in her arms.

You were a docile kid, wings clipped by those men at the club. They used to threaten to beat you up if you so much as made a small noise or a mistake. For a long time, you carried that pain and refused to talk to your Jisoo-unnie, or anyone else, for that matter. At school, kids made fun of you for acting all meek and weak.

There was a time when Jisoo was called by your teacher, asking if there was something wrong at home for you to act so distantly. You were seven years old around at this time, and you still didn't understand adult words. You just recalled your teacher telling Jisoo that you needed therapy or whatever that was.

Jisoo was barely of legal age. Your mother had a cut whenever Jisoo took in clients at the club. She spent more than half her money to feed you and ensure you could attend class.

Your Jisoo-unnie only had one reminder: "Study well, my dear. That's all I ask. You can get anything you want if you're smart and have lots of money."

You still didn't speak much but diligently followed whatever your sister said. Things took a turn after your teacher talked to Jisoo. The latter took the teacher's advice to heart, but she didn't have enough money to bring you to a professional. She could simply improvise.

"My dear, there's nothing to be scared of anymore, okay? I won't ever hurt you the way they did. Here," Jisoo offered her cheek to you. "You can slap me and tell me all the bad things those men did to you, I won't ever fight back."

You shook your head rapidly, cowering. Memories of those nasty men came like a tidal wave, sweeping you off your feet until you felt nauseated.

"Sshh, my dear. It's okay. Just try, okay...You're okay."

It took a lot of conviction before you relented. Every day, Jisoo would coax you to act like a regular kid who was not frightened of acting difficult and throwing tantrums. She made you feel like it was okay to be mean and that whatever you did or said, you would still be loved—this was the beginning of you having a sharp mouth that couldn't go one statement with profanities leaving your mouth.

You got away with so many things because of Jisoo.

That had been your setup for many years, but your life slowly progressed. You worked hard in school while Jisoo did all the jobs available to her. You got out of that tiny apartment and were able to move to a new house. You were initially reluctant to leave, afraid you would lose connection with the first friend you made in the neighborhood—Jungkook.

You didn't talk to Jungkook before, either. You two would casually sit beside each other and be in your own world.

"You don't have an adult at home? Cool, me too." That was the first thing Jungkook told you. You weren't bothered by his presence before, but Jungkook had become insufferable over time, teasing you here and there until you had to snarl at him.

Despite your banter, you had grown attached to Jungkook and even begged Jisoo not to separate you. Jisoo smiled at you, ruffling your hair and explaining that you would only move to a nicer home, but it was still around the area.

You felt relief flood your veins. Things were going well. You slowly healed from your traumatic childhood as you stayed close to Jungkook and your Jisso-unnie. Your sister kept her promise, never once leaving you.

Every day, Jisoo would go home to you. You gingerly waited for your sister to arrive; you'd set aside your homework and other stuff to open your front door and greet Jisoo with a simple "Welcome home!"

You couldn't maintain your happy façade as Jisoo smiled faintly at you, coughing and smelling like smoke. There were bags under her eyes, too exhausted at her work at the club.

You were getting older. You thought you could apply for a part-time job and help your sibling with the expenses, but Jisoo wanted you to focus on your studies. She brushed your concern off, saying, "It's just secondhand smoke. You know those men at the club, they can't live without cigarettes. Don't worry."

As usual, you blindly followed your sister's request. You hid your verbal concerns and could only welcome her home with hot water with honey. You did your best to care for your Jisoo-unnie until you moved to the university dorm and got busier with school. As time passed, your time with Jisoo lessened until it reached a point where Jisoo would not contact you. She even went as far as betraying you.

She must have known, right? How could she not know that you were hopelessly in love with Jungkook? How could the two most important people in your life betray you like this?

It just didn't make sense.

But then again, nothing made sense—not when feelings were involved. For instance, you flew all the way to Europe so you wouldn't have to deal with the mess back in Incheon. You had cut off connections with Jungkook and Jisoo, but months later, right when you were recovering from your hangover from clubbing too much, was when your doorbell rang.

It's probably Professor Verlaine, you thought. You didn't bother checking the peephole because, for one, you didn't want to see your professor looking prim and proper while you looked like shit. You were still wearing your clothes from last night and you just got up from the floor. Seeing Verlaine at the peephole would make you want to freshen up first; you just didn't have the energy for that.

And for fuck's sake. It's seven in the morning. Seven! Anyone who dared to disturb you at this ungodly hour deserved to see your bed hair, drool on the side of your mouth included.

So you opened the door, fully expecting to grin at your professor, but your smile froze mid-air.

You were still hungover, yet your reflexes were as agile as ever.

You slammed the door shut—no, wait, that's wrong. You swore you were about to slam the door shut. You were not a pushover and didn't intend to talk to your traitor sister.

But you stood there, stiff and unable to shut the door to her face when you heard her cough.

A stupid fucking cough.

Jisoo coughed, and you felt as if you were a child again, excited to open the door and welcome your sister home with hot water mixed with honey from the comb.

***

In hindsight, you should have seen it coming. Jisoo could go a long time without contacting you, though she could never cut you off completely.

Once, she promised to stay with you forever, and until now, that promise still stands.

A promise is a promise.

Jisoo was sitting on your couch. You foolishly let her in, heart still throbbing after hearing your sister's cough. It was just a stupid cough, yet you felt your resolve crumbling.

This can't be. You couldn't possibly still have a soft spot for her.

"Ya having a sidepiece spawn?"—so you attacked her.

Jisoo visibly flinched at the roughness of your tone. You sighed a breath of relief. Her expression would help you sleep at night: Jisoo lowered her eyes, lashes trembling because of your intense look at her stomach. You longed to damage her heart until all she wished to do was run.

Jisoo called your name, choking back a sob. It was hard to say if it was because of the guilt she felt toward you or if it was because of what you called her unborn child.

Yes, Jisoo was heavily pregnant.

It was unfair. Jisoo felt the kick in her belly while you felt like your heart had been stomped.

"It's Jungkook's." There was no room for rebuttal. You said it with finality.

Jisoo didn't deny it, either.

"Of fucking course." You chuckled mercilessly. "How many rounds of 'playing around' did it take before you finally managed to get knocked up?"

"We weren't playing around." Jisoo defended. It was real. The thing they have done, it was real. "But I never dated him."

You scoffed. "But you fucked him." Your jaw slackened. Looking at your sister ignited your anger.

"Once." Jisoo was desperate.

You did not know what to feel anymore. A searing headache hit you. You barked a laugh.

"Tell me, Jisoo-unnie," you said pointedly. You might as well knife her heart. "Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

Crashing defeat settled at the pit of Jisoo's stomach. The baby kicked her tummy aggressively like it was punishing her, too.

Jisoo called your name, trying again. "It was a one-time thing."

"A one-time thing." You repeated. It was probably said to reassure you, but it didn't. If anything, you just found a way to nitpick her excuse. "Not a one-time mistake?"

Jisoo inhaled sharply. For a moment, she looked like she wanted to cup her stomach to calm her baby, but she saw your piercing gaze there, leaving Jisoo no choice but to keep her hands on her side.

"We were both drunk. I admit, it was a moment of weakness."

Cliche. You snarled, feeling acid burn your throat. You wanted to vomit bile. "Still not calling it a mistake?"

"We both wanted it."

"Why!" Millions of questions attacked your head at once. Why did you betray me!? Why did you sleep with him, out of all people!? Was it good!? Was it worth breaking my trust? Why did you want it!?

Jisoo parted her lips, seemingly ready to answer your query, but you raised your hand to shut her up.

Jisoo obediently followed. 

"Don't answer that." You felt your knees buckling. You wanted to crawl and die.

"It is—"

"Please, stop." You were certain your heart had been broken to pieces, and you thought there was no way Jisoo could shatter it more.

But now you weren’t so sure anymore.

You could only storm off to your room, slamming the door and hoping Jisoo would leave you alone.

***

Jisoo did not leave you alone. She was sheepishly sitting on the couch when you emerged from your room.

"You're still here," you observed, no snark in your voice, but exhaustion was there. 

"I will be here," Jisoo responded with a small smile.

You ignored her, but she kept her promise.

She stayed the whole day in your home. The next day, she was still there.

Then the next.

And the next day.

And the next day.

And the next day.

And the next day.

And the next day.

You couldn't keep track anymore.

***

You and Jisoo were certainly not on good terms or talking terms. Fortunately, you learned to cohabitate without tearing each other apart.

Sometimes, you would buy baby clothes for Jisoo's child. You’d leave the shopping bag on the couch where your sister usually sat. However, you wouldn’t wait to see her reaction after checking the clothes.

Once, though, you accidentally saw her hugging the new clothes you had bought.

You caught Jisoo's gaze. Your sister smiled shyly at you.

Unlike before, you didn't immediately look away. In fact, you gazed at her as if asking, "It's white. A pretty neutral color. That should work, right?"

You weren't siblings without a reason. Jisoo picked up the question in your eyes.

She embraced the clothes tighter. "It's a boy. You’re going to have a nephew."

You did not react. You cast your gaze away and wordlessly left your sister alone.

But the next day, you had ten shopping bags in your hand. You left them at the usual spot.

Blue. You brought blue clothes and a bunch of toys.

You also brought pink clothes because assigning colors to gender was stupid.

But also because your nephew would surely look cute in blue, pink, and all other colors.

***

Jisoo was 32 weeks pregnant when you made up your mind to say something to her.

"That's it." You barged into the bathroom, catching your sister on the spot. She was vomiting blood.

Jisoo gave a start; her eyes were glistening with tears when she snapped her head up and met your glare. She hurriedly wiped her mouth.

"Why are you here?" Jisoo felt cornered, so she stepped back like a frightened lamb.

You smacked your lips together, finding this situation ridiculous. Jisoo had already slept with Jungkook; nothing could ever top that betrayal, so why was she acting like you would strangle her for puking blood?

"This is my apartment, in case you forgot."

"That's not what I meant." Jisoo inhaled as she struggled to swallow blood back to her stomach. "You're supposed to be at school."

"Yeah, whatever I skipped." You couldn't bear to see your trembling sister any longer. You helped her sit on the wide edge of the bathtub.

You worried about your Jisoo-unnie. She'd been retching in the bathroom almost daily. She thought she could hide it by turning the faucet on to muffle the sound, but she was wrong.

You planned to put an end to this. Your brow creased. "Enough with your bullshit. You are thirty-two weeks pregnant, and you can't possibly still be experiencing morning sickness. Even if you were, you'd be vomiting vile or that strawberry yogurt you've been eating every day. Not fucking blood."

"It's fine." Jisoo brushed it off, making a move to stand and end this conversation. You two never talked for more than one minute since she arrived, so why were you being loud now?

"You are not getting out of this conversation." You blocked her way out, glaring at her with the storm in your eyes. "I'll ask again. Why are you vomiting blood?"

The silence was deafening.

You wanted to punch the mirror. You cursed your sister; your eyes were turning bloodshot. The betrayal from before was back in full force. The fact that Jisoo wasn't telling you anything made you feel like she was hiding a nasty secret again.

You couldn't handle any more treachery. You might actually die.

"Don't lie to me again—" You cut yourself off, afraid you’d make yourself look pathetic by murmuring a soft please.

Jisoo stubbornly refused to speak. She watched as tears fell into her open palm.

She had done so well hiding this. She didn't want to tell you about her sickness, but every second that passed made Jisoo feel like the distance between you and her was stretching.

In the end, she could only concede. 

"I'm dying." Shallow breath. "I've cancer."

This time, it wasn't the distance that stretched but the silence.

Jisoo dared to peek at your reaction as the silence made her uncomfortable. Only two people knew she was sick: Jungkook and now you.

Jungkook at least hugged her and wiped her hands, telling her it would be all right.

But Jungkook was Jungkook. She hadn't done anything to hurt him.

But you? She shattered and betrayed you, so she should have expected it when she heard your giddy chuckle. However, when Jisoo looked at you, no sign of happiness or sadness could be traced on your face.

It was eerily impassive.

And then she heard you say:

"Good. That's good. I hope you die."

The bathroom door slammed shut, leaving Jisoo with tears in her eyes and kicking unborn child.

****

Jisoo was 33 weeks pregnant when you gave up on radio silence. Your sister was lying on the bed she bought herself. Your apartment only had one bedroom, but Jisoo still squeezed herself in. Seeing her dozing off on the couch was a pain, so one day, you brought brochures where Jisoo could choose a bed of her liking.

Jisoo bought a single bed, putting it close to your bed. You two slept without bothering each other. Tonight, though, you couldn't take it anymore.

You lay on your side, staring directly at Jisoo. Your sister was already looking at you.

She smiled and said hi.

You didn't bother with greetings. You went straight to the point.

"What type of cancer." It was like you were reporting the weather, refusing to ask the question properly. Your monotonous voice made you appear apathetic. No one knew how heavy your heart was.

"Does it matter?" Jisoo cupped her bulging belly. Her baby seemed excited whenever he heard his aunt speaking. He was wildly kicking Jisoo's belly.

"Tsk. Just answer the damn question. Why do you have to make everything difficult?"

This was starting to get on your nerves. Even after everything that happened, you still weren’t used to Jisoo not indulging you.

"It's not difficult. It just doesn't matter. I'm dying, anyway." Just like what you wanted. But Jisoo didn't say the last part. She was not in a position to hold grudges against you.

You hugged your pillow to your chest like you wanted to shield your heart that was about to jump out of your body.

"Just answer."

It was getting harder for you to breathe. Beads of sweat formed on your forehead; you couldn't seem to get the image of Jisoo coughing in your head.

Please don't let it be lung cancer. Please don't let it be lung cancer. Please don't let it be lung cancer. Please don't let it be lung cancer. Please don't let it be lung cancer—

"It's lung cancer."

Your heart missed a beat.

"How much time do you have left?" You dug your nails into the pillow while Jisoo sighed. She was sure you couldn't wait for her to die.

"Not too long. Maybe I'll pass soon after I have my baby."

"But why." Jisoo wasn't sure if she was imagining things, but she thought she heard you whine. "Don't you have a treatment plan? Fucking chemotherapy and stuff?"

"Chemotherapy is harmful for the baby." Jisoo's tone was soft.

"Fuck the baby!"

Even you were surprised by how resentful you were. But it was true, wasn't it? Her baby was the devil's spawn. It was the fruit of betrayal, so why was Jisoo choosing it over herself?

"Why didn't you abort it?" You abruptly sat on the bed, shooting daggers at Jisoo. A whirlpool of abuse danced at the tip of your tongue. You didn't voice it out because Jisoo looked sad.

"Don't be like that to Soobin."

"Who the fuck is Soobin? Why should I care!?"

"It's your nephew's name," Jisoo explained patiently as she caressed her stomach. Soobin had stopped kicking, probably scared of his aunt.

"That's such a basic name. It's so ugly. I hate it. I hate him."

You didn't give your sister a chance to speak. "Forget it." You turned off the lampshade. "I don't want to talk to you anymore. I'm going to sleep."

You laid back down. Darkness enveloped the room. This was better. This way, you couldn't see the sadness in Jisoo’s face.

But you couldn't sleep. You tossed and turned all night, but nothing worked.

It's my fault. You wanted to say. Jisoo got cancer because of you. That club was a rotten place. You should've stopped her from working there.

Lung cancer. What a bullshit thing to have.

"Don't die." A week ago, you were saying the complete opposite. "If you die, I'll chase you to hell. You can't die, Jisoo."

You still have debts to pay. I have not forgiven you yet. You have to suffer my eternal wrath, so do not die before me.

*** In Jisoo's 34th week of pregnancy, you had asked her another question.

"Why did you do it?"

Jisoo didn't need context. She knew exactly what you were talking about, but like before, you cut her off before she could explain.

"Never mind." You covered your face with a blanket and slept.

***

In Jisoo's 35th week of pregnancy, you pestered her again about chemotherapy.

"I told you already. It's harmful for Soobin."

"And I told you already, I don't care about Soobin." You rebutted.

This bedtime routine was tiring Jisoo. She felt like she was arguing with a wall.

"Good night," so she just turned off the lampshade and went to bed.

*** You asked about the betrayal again in Jisoo's 36th week of pregnancy.

"Are you sure you want to know now?" Jisoo's carefulness shot your heart.

You shook your head, your chest heaving.

"No," you admitted. "Never mind it."

***

Jisoo's 37th weeks pregnant when you panicked upon seeing her looking like she was in a lot of pain.

"What's the matter?" Your heart leaped to your throat. You were beside Jisoo at once.

Jisoo bit her lip and wiped the sweat on her forehead. "It's nothing. Your nephew's just being naughty. He keeps kicking my tummy."

Oh.

Your heartbeat returned to normal. And then you snorted and folded your arms across your chest. "Tell that scrub to shut his trap and quit being annoying."

You were about to return to your bed when Jisoo seized your wrist.

You flinched, but you didn't push her away.

It gave Jisoo the courage to push through her suggestion. She cleared her throat, "Why don't you pacify him yourself? He's quite obedient. Here, I'll guide you."

Jisoo slowly led your hand to her tummy. Your hand was stiff at first, almost resisting when you had contact with the skin of Jisoo's belly.

"Sshh, it's okay, dear." Jisoo's voice was like a lullaby. You relaxed at once.

It took you a while before you finally started caressing your sister's stomach without wanting to die.

And then you felt it.

"Oh!" Your eyes grew big. "He kicked me! Your kid kicked me!"

An involuntary chuckle came out of Jisoo. "Yes, he likes his aunt a lot."

"Hmp." You withdrew your hands. "Too bad I don't care about him."

Jisoo didn't react because, deep down, you were fooling no one.

***

You asked about the betrayal again in Jisoo's 38th week of pregnancy. Jisoo had learned her lesson, so she did not speak and pretended to be asleep.

***

You found the courage to be honest in Jisoo's 39th week of pregnancy.

"I take it back." You gripped your blanket. "Soobin isn't so bad. I think his name is cute."

Jisoo gasped, which had you worrying. You thought your sister was in pain again. These days, all she did was vomit blood.

However, Jisoo's gasp was because of plain surprise. She beamed at you, "Soobin just kicked me three times. He means to say he loves you."

"You're an idiot, and you know it." You clicked your tongue in disgust, "Tell your devil spawn I hate him."

Your words were harsh, but Jisoo knew your heart was melting.

Just a few more. Jisoo mused, mentally patting her baby's head. Your aunt’s gonna warm up to you soon, Bin-bin.

***

Jisoo was in her 40th week of pregnancy when she gave birth to a healthy baby boy.

It took a while before you got out of the hospital because of Jisoo's worsening condition. Thankfully, you were there to look after Soobin.

"Welcome home, mon bébé," you secretly whispered when you finally got home.

Soobin cooed at you, and you wanted to cry.

You stopped calling Soobin the devil's spawn.

***

Jisoo's 3 weeks postpartum, and she was delirious.

"Jisoo-unnie, it's time for your medicine." You were sitting in your sister's bed with a glass of water in your hand.

"Honey water again...?" She blinked, eyes unfocused. She was hot to touch. "I don't want honey water. You make them too sweet."

"This is not honey water." You tried to make her drink, but Jisoo was stubborn.

She called your name. “My dear, please. You have to listen to me, alright? Hide in the closet. Don't answer even when mom calls for you. I will..." She cupped your cheek. "I will be back for you, okay?"

Postpartum was foreign to you, but you figured your sister was struggling.

"There's no need to hide. I'm not a five-year-old anymore, Jisoo-unnie."

It was the wrong thing to say because Jisoo scowled. She was unhappy, though she kept caressing your face.

"What are you saying? You'll always be my little girl."

***

Jisoo's 9 weeks postpartum when her mind cleared up. Regrettably, her body became weaker.

"You can't even carry your own baby," you taunted, peering down at your bedridden sister as you gently rocked Soobin in your arms.

Your nephew was so well-behaved.

"It's okay." Jisoo coughed. "Soobin has you."

"I'm not a babysitter." You jutted your chin, annoyed. "Hurry up and get better. I'm getting tired of—oh."

You weren't able to finish whatever you were saying. You couldn't even remember what you were trying to prove. All your thoughts vanished when Soobin wrapped his tiny hand around your pinky.

"Jisoo-unnie! Look! Look! He's holding me!" You stepped closer to Jisoo's bed, crouching down so your sister could see.

Jisoo forced out a smile. But that small action was taxing to her body. She coughed up blood again. She wiped it before you could see it.

"That's good. That's really, really good...."

***

Jisoo was 10 weeks postpartum, and she was still rotting in bed.

"You have to force yourself to get better," you demanded, a deep scowl on your lips. "Just look at your son. He clings to me a lot. Do you want him to recognize me as his mom?"

Your statement was meant to be threatening, but it made Jisoo happier.

"He is yours, dear." Her voice was barely above a whisper. She didn't have the energy to speak louder, but she could still smile. "He is meant to stay by your side."

"Shut up." You rolled your eyes. "I'm not cut out to be a parent. This is your mess. I was not there when you made him." I was against you making him. You hurt me.

Jisoo's forehead creased, though. She didn't agree with you. "But I made him for you."

What?

You couldn't believe your ears. If postpartum was this kind of bitch, then you were willing to fight it. It was making your Jisoo-unnie act crazy. She was full of shit.

"Soobin...stay...you..." And she was blabbering random words.

You touched her forehead. She was burning. Her fever was probably making her crazy.

"Next time, I'm bringing you to an asylum." Soobin slept soundly in his crib, so you had time to care for your sister. You put a wet towel on her forehead. "You're crazy, did you know that? Who would have thought a cute baby like Soobin came from a nasty girl like you?"

Jisoo's scowl deepened. She struggled and weakly caught your wrist. "No. Soobin looks like...me."

You glanced at Soobin's sleeping form. Yeah, right.

"Keep dreaming. It's free."

"No." Jisoo cried. It looked like she took your statement to heart. "He looks like me...he should look like me..."

Suddenly, Jisoo was crying. You were stunned. What was this drama queen crying for!?

"He looks like me. Please. He should remind me of you. I'm dying, I'm dying. I'm dying--!!"

Your eyes widened. Jisoo was out of control. She was sobbing and kicking her feet, albeit weakly.

"Jisoo-unnie, calm down." You held her hands, giving up. "I believe you, okay? Soobin looks like you."

She was easy to pacify. She stopped crying at once, and then she cupped your cheeks.

"My dear, my little one...I'm sorry, your Jisoo-unnie can't keep her promise to you. I'm going soon. Stay...stay with Soobin, alright?"

Jisoo slowly trailed off. The terrible realization slapped you in the face.

You were shaking, bile crawling to your throat when you connected the dots:

There was a high possibility that Jisoo, your sister, planned on sleeping with Jungkook so she could get pregnant. She wished to get pregnant because, after all this time, she still saw you as a little girl who needed someone by her side.

And since she was dying, she needed someone to...

You stopped thinking. You looked at Soobin's sleeping form and sobbed; your sister's words echoed in your mind:

Stay with Soobin. I made him for you.

Fuck.

***

In Jisoo's twisted way, what she did was for your sake. Unfortunately, you did not ask any of this.

Jisoo was 15 weeks postpartum. She was like a withered flower. No color was left on her face. Death was around the corner.

"Are you there, my dear?"

You did not answer. The question you didn't have an answer to entered your mind. You hadn't asked in a long time. Should you?

"Why did you betray me?" You asked it aloud before you could think properly. You thought Jisoo's too weak to answer, but she forced herself to speak.

"I was lonely. We were both lonely."

In the grand scheme of things, that explanation should have made sense. Lonely people sought comfort. You should be the first to understand that. But you didn't. It only brought you pain.

"I can't make you happy?" But you were her sister and Jungkook...Jungkook was your best friend. How could you not know that the people you loved were suffering? That they were lonely? Were you that...insensitive?

"It's not about you." Jisoo groaned. She was in a lot of pain. "You will never understand our grief. Your life is...a bliss."

The pain was unbearable. You wanted to cover your ears. You regretted asking that question, but you just couldn't stop.

"So you don't trust me? You don't think I'd understand you?" Did Jungkook think so too?

Jisoo didn't give a clear answer. She couldn't breathe. Her chest was stuffy.

Silence prevailed.

You stared blankly at Jisoo.

Jisoo struggled to maintain her breathing. She called your name.

"Have you forgiven me?"

It took you an eternity to respond, but your tone was biting when you did.

"You and Jungkook bonded over something you thought I was too immature to understand, so tell me, Jisoo-unnie, how can I forgive you?"

It meant to hurt. But Jisoo smiled through the pain.

She seemed...happy.

"Good…Good. Don't forgive me. I don't deserve it."

Blood. There was blood everywhere. Jisoo was barely awake.

"But leave Soobin...out of your...anger. That kid will love you. I swear, he will love you."

You had no plans to give Soobin away.

"I know...I am in no position to ask you anything, but...Jungkook...he must know about his son. He deserves that much, no--" She seemed to shake her head. "Soobin deserves that much....Promise me, in three..."

She paused. She was thinking....calculating...

"No four...four years...three years..." It was getting confusing. "Return him home in three years. Ugh."

Jisoo couldn't hold on.

She called your name. “ You and Soobin...you two are my life...I love you...I'll see..." you.

Jisoo didn't get to finish her last statement. She died, eyes clamped shut and blood splattering everywhere.

She died while her son slept, and you wept.

**** A/N: I wrote this for so many hours...this is not edited, I feel like I'm going to vomit if I read this chapter one more time. Imdeadtired.exe.

We will be back in the present in the next chapter.

← Previous Chapter (06) | Next Chapter (08) →

[thatgoblin]

141 Men Losing Their Partner

Summary: Dead Dove Don't Eat.

WARNING: GRAPHIC CONTENT PERTAINING TO PREGNANCY, DROWNING, CAR ACCIDENT, MURDER, NO HAPPY ENDINGS.

Price

It had been a normal day for John, texting you at lunch to see what you wanted for dinner. It was Friday, which meant that it would be a lazy weekend after a grueling month of missions followed by an equally grueling week of training with cadets. Nothing seemed out of place as he pulled up to the house he shared with you, a small townhouse that was perfect for the time being, but with talk of a baby, you would need more room soon. 

“Love, I’m home,” John called, holding plastic bags full of Chinese cartons holding low mein and sweet and sour pork. “Love?” There was no answer. The inside was eerily quiet and John knew that quiet meant bad things. In the field, it meant that people were on the move and hiding it, but at home it meant you were either gone or hurt. After being told you would be home and waiting, he was on high alert. 

Guns weren’t a common item, but with his position he had one stashed. Stalking through the house, handgun held out as he cleared rooms, he was moving on instinct. Years of training from doing this through blown up buildings and searching for the bad guys was the only thing keeping him from running through the place and screaming your name. 

When he got to the kitchen, he spun around the corner with the gun raised, slipping on something slick and wet. Catching himself on the counter, his breath left him. 

There was so much blood. More than he had ever seen before, not even when he interrogated or was locked up in a Russian prison or even the fucking battlefield. Nothing compared the scene before him. 

John shook as he set his gun down, starting to hyperventilate as he locked eyes with your lifeless body. You were on the floor, your throat slit and body stabbed to the point that it looked like someone put ground beef on you. This couldn’t be real. It couldn’t. You were the safe place he had from the world. Everything about you had been his soft landing place. He had worked so hard to keep you separated from his job and it was all for nothing. 

Going to his knees, he crawled to you. John’s hands trembled as they touched your face in disbelief. He was unable to take a proper breath, the smell of your blood stinging his senses as he pulled you to him, pressing his face to yours. There was no conscious movement as he began to rock and weep softly. Holding you tight, he stayed there till Laswell showed up. She had been invited over with her wife for a double date. Kate tried to pull him away as her wife called the police, but it triggered him to start screaming. Even when the police showed up, it took an ambo arriving to sedate him for him to let go of you. 

“Be careful with her,” he sobbed as the medics put you on a gurney. “She’s allergic to penicillin. She gets hives. Please, she needs-she needs-”

Kate held him as he broke, going silent. “We were going to have a baby,” he whispered, tears soaking his beard. “We wanted to get a new house and have a baby. We wanted. . . What am I going to do?”

Gaz

You had been on a date with Kyle, a fun outing that was desperately needed after being separated for months. You went to dinner at this greasy burger place then went to an arcade that had a giant purple dragon he swore he would get you. After five tries and lots of swearing, he finally did it. “My hero,” you cooed, holding your prize as you leaned in to kiss his cheek. “Ready to head home? I don’t think this guy is meant to be carried around for long.”

“I am if you are,” Kyle said with a grin, giving you a wink. Wrapping an arm around your waist, he pulled you along to get to the street. He held his hand up to hail a cab, holding you close as you pressed against his body. It had been too long since you had last held him and with having him home for a few weeks, you were refusing to let him go any time soon. 

“Can’t get a bloody cab for shit,” he huffed. You were about to tell him you could call for one when you heard tire screeching. There was no time to react to the car hitting the curb then the pair of you. It was milliseconds and even if either of you had been looking at it, there was no escaping it. 

The car had been speeding when it barrelled over you two. Kyle flew over the hood and slammed into the windshield as you were dragged under the tires. Screams from everyone filled the air as the car stopped for just a moment before swerving off to leave you.

“Ky-Kyle,” you wheezed, laying on the ground. Your middle had been crushed and you couldn’t feel anything below your chest. It hurt to breathe, making you choke and gasp as Kyle forced himself to drag himself to you.

“Doll,” he groaned, his leg at a bad angle and his head bleeding profusely. “Don’t move. Stay with me.”

“Kyle,” you choked out. “Cold.”

“No, please,” he whimpered, collapsing next to you as people gathered to try and help keep you still as others called the ambulance. “Darling, don’t. Please.”

“Love,” you whispered as he took your limp hand. “You.”

“Help is coming, please, just hold on,” he begged as you stayed still and quiet. “Darlin’? Baby? No, no, no, no.” The ambulance didn’t arrive for nearly an hour. Price showed up well before them. He made Kyle stay still as he kept calling for you, holding your hand. Someone had draped their jacket over your top and another person laid their’s over your middle, hoping to give you some decency as Kyle demanded that Price help you. Even when he was in danger of snapping his spine, paralyzing himself for life, he still made you the priority. 

“Gaz,” Price said softly. “She’s gone. I’m sorry, lad.” 

“No, please. She’s just-just quiet,” Kyle sobbed, his physical pain not even compared to what he was feeling when he was made to let go of you for good.

Soap

It had started out as a weekend trip to blow off some steam. You and Johnny had gone to a resort in a warm climate with crystal clear water and amazing food. There was plenty of mixed, frozen drink and tanning lotion for the pair of you to get some nice warm color back into their almost sickly complexions. 

Johnny made sure to get plenty of pictures of you in your bathing suit, specifically your ass. You  gave him shit, but he just laughed and took more. Included in your stay was a boat tour of a cave. It wasn’t the rainy season so it was safe. No sudden surges or unexpected storms. Johnny said he’d been in more dangerous pools in the UK, making you relax and trust that things would be fine. 

You weren’t the strongest swimmer, but you were good enough to get by. Add in a life jacket and Johnny next to you, you felt safe. Untouchable really. What took you by surprise was the rumble of thunder as you got halfway into the tour. 

“Don’t worry, it will miss us,” the guide said, easing any worries that would pop up. Holding Johnny’s hand, you were about to make a comment about the glowing algae when you heard a clicking pop. Turning to him, you were left speechless. 

“You know I’m not good with words, but I think this speaks for itself,” he said, holding up a rose gold ring with a set of yellow diamond leaves. “Will you marry me?”

“Yes,” you said softly. “Yes! I would hug you aggressively, but I don’t want to lose the ring and tip the boat!” You cried with a shrieking laugh. Sliding the ring onto your finger, he pulled you close for a kiss as flashes from the phone the tour guide held reminded you that you weren’t alone. 

“I got everything recorded, Mr. Johnny,” he said with a grin, handing Johnny’s phone back to him. 

“Thanks, Mate,” Johnny said with a grin, keeping you close. As the guide turned the boat around, thunder rumbled again, much louder that time. “We’re still good, right?” He asked.

“Yeah, we’re heading back now, no worries,” the guide said as he navigated the slowly raising waters. You held onto Johnny as the thunder got louder and you could see the lightening was able to be seen from the front of the cave. 

Another rumble lasted longer, making you look around at the water. The rumbled quickly turned into a rushing sound, getting louder in seconds as a monstrous wave slammed into the cave, sending all the water rushing back. The rush slammed into the boat, making the bow lift high. With the guid on the back of the boat and you and Johnny in the middle, the weight distribution didn’t save you from being tossed into the water as the boat capsized. 

You screamed, grabbing for Johnny as you were pulled under. There was no preparation to stay under too long, your lungs burning as you blindly clawed at the bottom of the cave to find the side or top. Bursting through the surface with a choking gasp, you didn’t have time to get another breath before you were pulled back under by the rip that had been made by the current. Not even with the life jacket were you able to break through the water. 

Johnny was able to grab the guide and get him to higher ground in the cave. Dragging him onto rocks, he began to scream your name. Where had you gone!? You were right there! “Where are you!” He screamed, ready to jump back in.

“No, you will drown! It’s not safe until after the storm!” The guide cried as he grabbed Johnny’s arm. 

“My partner is in there!” Johnny snarled, but the guide fought with him, keeping him where it was safe while you were left on your own. As the flash storm rolled on, just a few minutes after it showed up, your life jacket floated out from the back of the cave. It didn’t mean anything, you could still be alive. Despite the water calming, the guide made them stay on the rocks till a rescue boat came in, shining a light on them. “There’s someone still in here!” He yelled as the men climbed into the boat. 

“We know, we have her outside,” the rescue worker said, helping them sit before turning the boat around.

“She’s okay?” Johnny asked, surprised as he never saw you since you fell from the boat. The man was quiet, not looking at him. “Is she okay?” He pushed. “Can you fuckin’ tell me if she’s alive or not!?” He snarled. All he received was silence. When the boat came out and he saw a white sheet laid over a body on the beach, he jumped from the rescue boat before it could stop. Running over, he was screaming your name as the police were taping off the beach. One of the officers tried to stop him, but he easily shoved them aside as he kept screaming. 

You were still and silent as he picked you up, refusing to let anyone near you as he wailed in grief. Holding you, he rocked the two of you as the police tried to control the growing crowd. There was nothing they could do to help him, as news crews began to swarm the beach to get pictures of the grief stricken man holding his fiancee’s body as her hand with the engagement ring dangled free for them to take pictures of and plaster on the front pages.

Ghost

 You were just a month and a half shy of being full term. When Simon had been called to do a mission, you were pissed and ready to fight Price, but Simon calmed you down before you could come at the bearded man with a cricket bat. It wouldn’t be that long and he’d be back with plenty of time for the baby to be born. 

It had only been two days when you felt contractions start. At first you thought it was Braxton Hicks contractions, but then you felt your water break. When you went to the bathroom to check, you found that it wasn’t your water. It was blood and it was soaking your underwear and pants. Calling an ambulance, you unlocked the front door so they could get in. Once you were sure they were on their way, you called Simon’s emergency line. It wouldn’t go to him directly, but he would know what was happening right away at least. Leaving your message, the ambulance arrived soon after.

Crying, you held your stomach as you were strapped to a gurney and rushed to the hospital. You weren’t being told anything, just to keep breathing as the pain grew. With your phone in your hand, you kept checking it to see if Simon was able to call, but there was nothing. At the hospital, you were rushed into surgery as you begged one of the nurses to call the emergency line again to see when Simon could call. She promised she would keep trying as you handed off your phone. Once in surgery, you were put under and the last thing you thought was a plea to any deity listening to save your baby. 

Simon got the message and was gone. He didn’t ask permission or explain. His whole team was with him, though, getting him back home as quickly as possible. It was nearly five hours later in a plane to a helicopter that took him to the hospital with some of his gear and mask still on. Jumping out of the helo before it could land fully, he ripped his mask and vest off to throw to the side as he sprinted to where you were. 

His head was empty aside from the drive to get to you. You had to be okay. You had to be. There was a nurse waiting for him at the stairs, stopping him from running blindly through the hospital. 

“Mr. Riley,” she said, not flinching under his gaze that was fire and rage. 

“Where is my wife?” He growled, towering over her. 

“You’re wife. . . I am so sorry, but she didn’t make it,” the nurse said. Simon could only hear the ringing in his ears that he would hear when he was near a concussion grenade going off. “Her uterine lining ripped and she had lost too much blood by the time she arrived at the hospital.” None of her words seemed to register to her as his team came up behind him. 

Every word was lost on him as he stood there, not responding to anything she said. Not even Price shaking him could bring him to. 

“What about the baby?” He finally asked, coming out of it enough to think of that. “Is she okay?”

“She’s stable and in the NICU. Despite being born rather early, she is healthy and will stay there till she’s considered to term to make sure she has the best chance of surviving,” the nurse said. Simon nodded, going quiet again. 

“I want to see her. I want to see my wife,” he said. The nurse nodded, knowing he would do it anyway he could. His face said it all. Taking him to the OR, she waved others on when they stopped to question why four men were being let into the room. The team held back while Simon moved forward to the white sheet covered table. With steady hands, he pulled the cover back to see your face. You looked like you were sleeping. He would watch you before you awoke for the day and this was the same face. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, stroking your hair. His gloves were long gone, leaving him bare to the world he struggled to hide from. “I’m so sorry. I should have never left.” Leaning forward, he pressed your faces together as he quietly cried. He had lost his family, then found you and it was a breath of life to him. Now you were gone and left him with a small piece of you. He didn’t know if he could do it without you, if he could be someone his daughter needed or wanted. Simon didn’t know how to be a good partner till you came along, so how could he know how to be a good dad without you?

Masterlist

Taglist: @birdstoprey @sebbytheraccoon @pricescigar @alwaysshallow @sae1kie @sleepydang @lexi-zsy09 @ghostlywhiskey @ghosts-cyphera @poohkie90 @neothewitch @shadofireshinobi @sadslasher13 @0alk0msan @xaestheticalien

[glow-worms-are-believers]

Slip and Fall (dp x dc)

It had started when he’d moved to Gotham and, maybe more importantly, when he’d moved out of Amity. The ghost attacks had finally started to calm down thanks to the systemic overhaul the Ghost Zone had experienced after Pariah Dark had been imprisoned for the second time. With a better structure, they had actually started to be able to wrangle their own criminals instead of leaving it to a half-dead (and very tired) teen.

While that had been a big relief on the ghost side of things, the human side of thing had also gone through a major upheaval. His parents actually not shooting at a ghost envoy long enough to actually hear them out had been a minor miracle. Them actually believing said envoy had felt like a straight-up dream. To go from ghost hunter to ghost right defender was a big change, but Fentons didn’t do things halfway. Except Danny of course, but that couldn’t be helped.

With Amity being able to stand on its own without needing Phantom around, Danny had finally been able to focus on school and just being normal for once, and so he had. The last three years had been wonderful. He’d worked his ass off to get his grades back up and he’d even had time to actually made friends with some of the A-listers. Sam and Tucker had likewise been able to enjoy the full teenager experience and had also been glad to get a bit of normalcy back.

By the time graduation rolled around, they’d all applied and gotten accepted into different universities. They’d planned to go to the same close-by college but Jazz had disagreed. Their fields of studies were different and she’d said they owed it to themselves to find the best program for each. Which was why Danny had found himself in Gotham, in a student apartment not too far from campus with a job at the nearest coffee shop. The first month there had been exciting and full of new things. Gotham was a big city, much different from the comparatively smaller Amity and there were novel sights and stuff everywhere. His classes had been interesting and he’d met a ton of new people.

The second month had rolled by and as the elation had settled, Danny had started feeling a bit lonely. He’d reasoned that it was because he couldn’t see his friends as often and had doubled the phone-calls back home. He’d thought it was just a bit of home-sickness and that’d it go away soon.

But then, things didn’t get better. Instead, Danny felt himself growing distant from everything around him. He still talked to people in his classes, he still video-called his sister and friends every week but he felt removed from it all. Like he was a passerby, observing everyone else go through their lives. It was like he was floating away, farther and farther from his life. It was disconcerting, but Danny felt too detached to care about it very much.

After another unremarkable shift at the coffee shop, Danny had stumbled into his apartment and absent-mindedly prepared his supper. As he was picking at the mashed potatoes, a strange feeling started in his chest. He frowned as he rubbed at it, only for it to grow into an intense cold feeling that spread through his extremities. Danny struggled to get up to walk towards the phone as his body froze over. He didn’t make it before the numbing feeling completely took over and his mind slowed accordingly before he closed his eyes and lost himself to peaceful nothingness.

Danny’s consciousness returned slowly to him. He could vaguely hear hushed voices but as he tried to open his eyes, it was to find it impossible, his body unwieldy. Before he lost consciousness again, Danny managed to catch a few words which sounded like “help” and “inside”.

The second time he woke up, his mind felt much clearer and though sitting up took considerably more effort than he would’ve expected, he still managed to do so and take stock of where he’d ended up. It was a big room with big and curtained glass windows that let in sunlight that illuminated the dedicatedly carved wood furniture. The bed itself was queen-sized with high-quality linen and luxuriously plump pillows. Danny’s eyes turned to the window and the small corner of green lawn he could see from his vantage point. Before he could attempt to get closer, the door to his room opened and a man walked in.

“Oh, you’re awake!” exclaimed the man as he got closer to Danny’s bedside. “We were worried after finding you passed out last night but it’s good to see you back with us.”

Danny tried to talk only to find himself unable to get anything but a croak to come out. Embarrassment had his cheeks warming, but the man’s eyes were kind as he handed Danny a glass of water he hadn’t noticed on the nightstand. The water felt good for his parched throat and he tried again.

“Where am I?” Danny rasped.

“This is Wayne Manor,” the man said. “My wife and I found you yesterday. What’s your name?”

[postcardsfromspace]

An Open Letter to New York Times Subscribers

Hello,

I am writing to encourage you to cancel your subscription to the New York Times, in light of their consistently aggressively biased, irresponsible, and shoddy reporting on trans issues and stacking of their op-ed section with transphobic voices.

This is not a new problem, but it's one that the NYT has compounded and doubled down on over the last few years. The open letter published yesterday is a remarkably civil overview of the issues with their reporting and the material harm that reporting has done; it doesn't even touch on the op-ed stuff, which is absolutely vile. The NYT's official response was to dismiss the signatories--including hundreds of NYT contributors and thousands of readers and other media professionals (including me)--as "activists" working at odds with the NYT's nominal goal of journalistic integrity. The next day--today--they headlined their op-ed section with a defense of J.K. Rowling, who has done more to misinform and stoke the fires of transphobia--in both practice and official policy--than any other public figure, comparing her "persecution"--being correctly identified as transphobic--to that experienced by Salman Rushdie, and repeatedly misgendering trans men as women.

As a former journalist, I consider the NYT's reporting on trans issues unconscionable; as a trans person, I find it incredibly scary. NYT articles--ones misreported to an extent that has triggered open criticism from major medical organizations--have been used to justify some of the most aggressive anti-trans legislation this and last season. That the "paper of record" has decided to advocate for our dehumanization puts the dignity and lives of people like me in active jeopardy, and regardless the quality of their other work, I don't think there's a conscionable way to continue to support them. Yours, Jay Edidin

[cussima]

𐙚₊˚ I ACCIDENTALLY MANIFESTED WHITE TEETH TODAY ⊹♡

post contents:

✴︎ how manifestations can show up ✴︎ doubts i had + how i didn't deal with them to show you that manifestations show up regardless ✴︎ context for my teeth before and now story time:

I had my braces removed in december of 2019, straight away you could tell how stained my teeth were afterward, but the pandemic happened. There wasn't a need to get them whitened out (since nobody was going to see my teeth), or a possibility (cuz who tf would go to the dentist when a virus transmitted through breathing was happening). Fast-forward to 2023, the stains were still there but I had no toothaches or anything, my teeth seemed perfectly healthy, but stained. Since I hadn't been to the dentist in three years, I got an appointment. But when I mentioned the stains and that I wanted to get rid of them the dentist dodged it, like completely ignored me !! I assumed she dodged me because I'm a student and the price for a whitening would be too expensive (😭) So I thought that was it ! I would have to live with the stains for the rest of my life. I did some research on stains, apparently, some are harder to remove than others, and since the last dentist had ignored me when I asked her about them, I assumed they were unremovable. Accepting that they were magic-unremovable-stains didn't have that much of an impact on me until a few weeks ago; when my teeth became whiter and the stains more noticeable due to the contrast between them. What did you do to manifest this away? + Limiting beliefs I had with this Well it was such a straight in my face thing that I said "no they're whiter now." and forgot about it, then went back to reacting to them when I would see them (and it still manifested as you see, otherwise I wouldn't be writing this) ✴︎ I was so determined to listen to the 3D that I changed my smile to make the stains wouldn't show as much, or I would cover my mouth when I smiled or laughed, etc. ✴︎ Went as far as thinking "this is the only thing about me that is unattractive" or I would compare myself to others thinking "They have crooked teeth and I don't, but at least they're white" ✴︎ Only yesterday I was watching a girl talking about auras, and she said smiling was extremely attractive and I said "must be easier when your teeth aren't stained, so I'll just not smile as much" Until today !! I had a dentist appointment for a yearly check-up (a different dentist) and I was absolutely dreading it. I hate hate hate !! The dentist, I only go because it's a responsibility I maintain for my health. I didn't have much money on me, only enough for the tooth decay I believed I had and the price of the appointment. Which wasn't a lot. When I got in the dentist checked my teeth, he said I definitely have a decay but it's between two teeth so it would cost double what I had. And he told me !! My teeth were really stained and I had to get them whitened, and the price of the whitening was the exact money I had with me for that appointment !! So obviously I took the chance and whitened them.

I am so happy with my new white teeth, I'm smiling so much now because I'm so confident on my smile. They literally look GORGEOUS. I am so excited y'all I'm soso happy. Moral of the story: Manifestations show up in different and unexpected ways, but they always always still come !! Even if you don't have a military persistence with them!

[enkas-illusion]

Double Trouble

Fandom / Pairing: Jujutsu Kaisen / Gojo Satoru x f!reader

Rating: SFW

Genre/Theme: Established relationship; non-sorcery au

Content warning: fluff, suggestive, no smut, language.

Summary: Boyfriend!Satoru with a twin and they're exact copies of each other, down to their mannerism so they often switch places just to test how long it takes for you to figure out you're talking to the other one.

Author's Note: The one where he isn’t the only Honoured one. I hope you enjoy this one shot. Thank you for reading! 

~ Eren’s Birdie

Song Dedication: Say Yes by Loco, Punch

Satoru Gojo was everything you could've asked for in a partner. He was kind, funny, intelligent, sexy, and had better emotional maturity than most men despite being somewhat of a nihilist in his own way – perfect was the word to describe him.

The only problem was that he was a bit too much to handle at times, or dare one say, a bit *too many, – meaning his mother gave birth to him and thought ‘he's perfect!’ so she popped another xerox copy 2 minutes later.

And thus were born Satoru and Soichiro, the most identical twins in the history of twins. The two not only shared the same face but had gained quite some notoriety among friends and family for sharing the same brain cell as well. 

While you had no reason to complain about their flawless personalities, they'd taken a liking to mess with you each time they got together. One would think they'd go easy with the pranks if it's someone they love, right? Wrong! It meant the shit you had to endure was way worse than any other normal friend would have to.

On one such instance, Soichiro tagged along with Satoru after work and it wasn't until halfway through dinner that your instinct went off and you figured out it was the twin who was sitting next to you instead of your boyfriend as usual. Later that night, you'd warned Satoru about it, presenting a solid argument even he couldn't resist.

“You know I almost grabbed his thigh under the table tonight!”

“No, you didn't,” Satoru scoffed.

“Okay, maybe not. But it’s highly likely that I could've! Ummm… what if one day you return home and I greet you in some skimpy lingerie but instead of you, it’s your brother who sees me, all titties out???” You were grasping at straws really.

“Will you do that!?” His ears perked up.

“Not the point, Toru…”

“Hmm… okay fine, I won't let it get that far,” he assured you. 

“But you'll still continue to tease me?” You huffed and he nodded his head, smiling innocently. You rolled your eyes at him, complaining about how he was the ‘worst’ while he simply gave you a bear hug and a few kisses to make it up to you.

~~~

So, even after being with Satoru for more than a year, you still did not know how to distinguish between the two. The only people to do so in a split-second were his parents. You had once sat the twins down to compare their faces for any tiny details you might’ve missed but you came up short regardless. 

You could only tell the difference by instinct, after having a conversation with them – maybe you were more delusional than you'd like to admit but to you, Satoru's voice held a lot of love each time he called your name.

In an attempt to distinguish the two, you thought you'd successfully managed to get Satoru to dye his hair black with temporary colour last time you went to their family house, only to find out Soichiro had done the same and was waiting for you, waving his arm at you in the driveway with a victorious grin.

So when you don't find the twin greeting you like a devil inviting you to hell this time, you turn to your boyfriend who's undoing his seatbelt.

“Listen to me, Satoru,” you grab his collar to turn him to look at you as you speak in a serious tone, “Please don't fuck with me this time. One of these days, I might really embarrass myself due to your games.”

“I'm betting on it baby,” he grins as he gives you a quick peck before swiftly making his way out of the car to avoid your scolding. You were going to stay at his parents’ country house for a weekend and you could already tell it was going to be a long weekend.

You sigh as you grab your bag and he opens the door for you before pulling the bag out of your hand and holding his hand out for you. It's impossible to be annoyed at Satoru for long when he pulls shit like this.

When you enter the house, Satoru excuses himself to find his father and you make your way to the backyard garden where you guess his mother might be. You smile to yourself when your guess is right.

“How can I help?” You smile, making his mother turn to look at you. She gently puts the shovel down next to the plants she's depotting.

“Hello dear, you've arrived just in time… would you mind bringing the remaining pots? They’re near the window in the reading room,” she instructs and you nod as you make your way back inside.

You walk the long corridor before you reach your destination, making your way to the window where the pots were placed. You lift two in each hand, holding them with care, trying not to drop them or stain your t-shirt. 

“Need some help?” you hear a voice and turn around to see the other twin at the door. The only reason you can tell it's Soichiro is because he's wearing a grey t-shirt and black sweatpants as opposed to your boyfriend who was wearing a purple hoodie and coal grey pants. 

“Hey Sochi, could you pick the last one?” You motion your head in the direction of the last pot, “Gotta move it to the garden.”

He nods before picking up the pot and walking with you, back to the backyard garden. 

“Did you arrive before us? I didn't see your car in the driveway,” you make conversation along the way.

“My car's out for servicing. I arrived with the mothership yesterday when she was in town shopping,” he explains.

“Hmm…” you nod as you stop near the area where the soil has been rooted out of the ground, “here.” 

You motion to him to keep the pot down and he obeys as he leans down to place them there gently. You're busy looking around to find Mrs. Gojo when you hear him speak, “Anything else, princes–”

Your eyes widen as your head snaps back to look at him.

“SATORU!” you gasp at the nickname that accidentally slips out of your boyfriend's name, making you realise it's not his twin.

“Soichiro! Leave my poor girl alone,” the other blondie walks out wearing the exact same clothes. You look between the two as you stare in disbelief, not being able to tell who's who.

You're about to speak when you hear their mom's voice as she moves closer to you, pressing an arm gently around your shoulder, “Satoru… I'd expect you of all people to be nice to her,” shaking her head at the twin standing next to you.

You were right! The twin next to you is Satoru!

“No, it's okay! The best way to deal with them is to avoid both of them the entire weekend,” you give your boyfriend the fakest smile you can muster up as you walk hand in hand with his mother to fulfil your gardening duties.

As it's the only exact identical matching outfit the twins have, they don't mind wearing it all weekend. As the day progresses, you find yourself working your brain full time to notice any difference you can find, but the guys are relentless to the point where even their sleeves are rolled to the exact same length.

And of course, the whole day is spent the way you’d dreaded and almost predicted it’d be like. Later when you’re out on the porch having coffee and watching the sunset with your boyfriend, you notice Satoru has an insect bite on the side of his wrist.

“Toru?” you question, wanting to make sure you have the right twin next to you.

“Hmm?” he peels his eyes away from the pretty sunset to look at you. 

“Kiss me?” you ask softly.

“Wha– is this a test?” He raises an eyebrow.

“You know what, nevermind… I just felt like it cause this is the first time we’ve been alone all d–” your words are cut off by his lips capturing yours. You smile into the kiss as Satoru cups your face, caressing your cheek.

Satoru check completed! You make a mental note to observe his wrist for the mark each time you interact with the twins.

After dinner when everyone's lazing around in the living room and watching whatever reality tv show is playing in the background, you excuse yourself to go to the washroom. Roaming around, you end up in Satoru's old bedroom. It's endearing seeing how you can still find pieces of his current personality, likes, hobbies and interests in bits, plastered everywhere around his room.

You find yourself craving some alone time with your boyfriend all of a sudden so you pull your phone out to text him to come up to his room. You only have to wait a few minutes before you hear a knock on the door.

“It's open,” you say as you place the book that you were holding back on the shelf. With a big grin, you extend your arm out to him and he takes it.

“Hello, darling,” he says in a playful tone and your eyes briefly glance at his wrist. No mark. It's Soichiro. He pulls you into a hug and pats your head.

Fine. If your boyfriend still wants to mess with you even when you’re needy for him, he's gonna get his payback. You decide at that moment – this switcharoo bullshit stops today.

You smile innocently at Soichiro as you pull away, your hands travel up to his chest to push him back till he falls on the bed.

You hop on top of him to straddle him but are careful enough to not actually make any sort of inappropriate contact, hovering above without closing the gap between your bodies. You simply wanted to push him enough to get him uncomfortable and to confess.

You can see the nervousness on his face as he clears his throat to come up with an excuse to get out of this situation without making it awkward, “T-the door’s open, let me–”

“It’s just us Toru… I doubt anyone’s gonna bother coming up to find us anyway,” you purr as you lean your body forward, placing your palms on the sides of his head to support your weight. You start feeling anxious too, you need him to break soon or you’d have to abandon the act, so you persist and whisper in his ear, “You look so sexy, I’ve been wanting to feel you inside me all day, Satoru.”

You cringe internally at your own words. But in that moment, you can see his face get paler than it usually is and you want to laugh at how nervous he looks when he hits his limit at your lewd comments.

“Wait, I’m no–” Soichiro pushes you by the shoulders as he begins in panic, another voice interrupts, pushing the half-open door forcefully, “Baby, wait!”

You feel a large arm hook around your waist to pull you away. As you stumble to your feet, breaking free from his hold, you turn around to see an annoyed Satoru, knitting his eyebrows as he looks at you. He looks more annoyed at himself than at you.

“Satoru?” you question as you bring up a hand to his cheek.

“Yes, baby?” he asks in that loving tone you’re so used to as he wraps his arms around your waist tighter.

You smile as you caress his cheek, trying hard to hold in your laughter, “What… A… Dumbass!”

You burst out laughing as you break free from his embrace and he stares at you in disbelief. You look from him to Soichiro, who’s already stood up from the bed as you hold your stomach, hurting from laughing so much, “That should teach you both!”

“Well then, I’m gonna go watch tv with the only two sensible people in this house,” you wave the baffled twins goodbye and turn around to leave the room. The very next second, you’re taken by surprise when you feel a hand grab your wrist to keep you from moving.

You turn around to see that your boyfriend seems… mad at you?

“Sochi, do you mind? I wanna talk to her alone,” Satoru motions his brother to leave the room.

“Yikes, just keep it quiet,” the twin chuckles in embarrassment as he walks out hastily. You hear the door close behind you before footsteps recede down the hallway.

You look at Satoru, expecting him to speak up. But your boyfriend simply grabs both of your wrists before twisting them behind your back and closes the distance between your bodies.

“Waitttt… is this Toru or Sochi? It is impossible to tell!” your words are dry and sarcastic as you giggle at him.

“Baby, I don’t think you’re in a position to be laughing at me right now,” he towers over you, his grip on your waists tightening.

“But here we are! I told you not to mess with me,” you chuckle as you try to wriggle your wrists out of his grip.

“And I’ve warned you not to press my buttons… or do I need to remind you again?” he grunts as he flips you around, walking you to the bed till your knees hit the edge of the bed, making you stumble on the mattress with him behind you. He brings a hand to the back of your head to press your face down into the mattress and you take this opportunity to try to hold him. He tsks at your movement before moving away from your completely.

You flip your body around to lie on your back and see what’s going on, only to find him rummaging through his closet. When Satoru turns around to walk back towards the bed, you notice two ties in his hands. 

This isn’t how you’d expected your little prank to turn out but you definitely weren’t complaining. However, just as Satoru straddles you, grabbing your wrists, his phone buzzes in his pocket.

“What?” he groans into the speaker.

“Mum’s calling you both downstairs,” you hear Soichiro’s voice on the other end.

You press your lips together to keep yourself from laughing as Satoru groans once again before cutting the call with a ‘be right there’.

“I think god sent a guardian angel disguised as your mom for me,” you chuckle as you sit up, making your way out from under him.

“You’re lucky,” Satoru grabs your jaw, “but don’t get ahead of yourself, guardian angel can't save you past her bedtime.”

You poke your tongue out to tease him, breaking free and springing out of the bed, mumbling a ‘whatever’, walking out towards the living room. 

As you make your way back down the hall, you hear your boyfriend’s footsteps behind you. You smile to yourself as you begin to brew different ideas of riling him up further throughout the night.

~fin~

[chillicoded]

Lando Norris is NOT an underdog.

This is NOT Lando hate. I don't endorse or tolerate hate towards ANY driver. This is just an opinion.

I had a conversation with somebody on Bumble about the Norris/Verstappen championship battle this season. I was for Verstappen, he was for Norris - no problem whatsoever in itself. After Max's absolute dominance last season, I really can't blame anyone for being bored of Max winning and wanting to see a new driver succeeding. But what Got My Goat is that he said the reason he wants Lando to win the WDC is because "he's an underdog". I sent a (pretty lengthy) message back on why I really don't think Lando qualifies as an underdog, and he never got back to me to defend his position. Maybe I scared him off, or maybe he just wasn't on Bumble to debate the nuances of what it means to be an underdog. Either way, I figured the topic would make a good first opinion post because I'm more likely to get a discussion out of it here, plus I have extra thoughts to add.

To me, an underdog is somebody who is disadvantaged because of the external resources available to them, in comparison to those they are competing against. For an F1 driver, that's the car, the team, the strategy, the experience they have in F1, the track (not just condition, but whether or not it suits their car) and momentary bursts of luck, among countless other variables. A good "underdog coming out on top" narrative comes from a person or character (in this case a driver) performing well or succeeding despite lacking the ideal resources to do so.

It's important to note that I don't think skill counts as an external resource. I also think skill is hard to measure. I personally would measure it in terms of results, consistency and versatility, but even within that, I feel like you need to take all of the external factors into account. For example, DNFing or dropping way back because of a collision, bad luck with the car or a botched pit stop would make a dent in a driver's consistency and results, but it doesn't mean they're less skilled.

Underdog narratives do exist in F1. The Alpine double podium in Brazil was a great underdog narrative. The Alpine car is hardly competitive most of the time. At the start of the season it was an absolute tractor. I don't know enough about the team, strategies, pit stops, etc. to comment on those, but regardless, I don't think anyone was expecting a double podium from them this season because Alpine just hasn't been competing at the front of the field. Yet, despite all that, both drivers finished on the podium and scored mad points in easily the most unpredictable race of the season.

Franco Colapinto performing well and scoring points, despite being dumped into Williams mid-season with a firmly midfield car and no experience, is also an underdog narrative. He's far outperformed Logan Sargeant already and has been battling with some of the most experienced drivers on the grid, and coming out on top. I don't think anyone was expecting all this from him when he was first brought into F1. Personally I saw a lot of people saying that they were booting out one underprepared F2 driver, and replacing him with another underprepared F2 driver. I was part of that crowd too. Sorry Franco. I was not familiar with your game.

Even Carlos Sainz's win at Singapore last year could be considered an underdog narrative. Sure, he started on pole and he's an experienced driver, but everyone was an underdog compared to Red Bull (mainly Max) last year, and Ferrari didn't have a great car or great strategies. He did have the luck of Max being practically out of sight, having been outqualified by Liam Lawson in an AlphaTauri (another great underdog moment, by the way), but it still takes skill to keep the lead, and his strategic use of Lando goes to show that even further than just the win itself.

These are just a few recent examples. Think about them. Seriously deep them. Revel in how they make you feel.

Now think about Lando's performance this season.

His first win in Miami was great. At the time, I was still a hardcore Lando supporter and I was absolutely thrilled. A few laps before the end of the race, when it became apparent that he was almost definitely going to win, I was already celebrating for him. It had been a long time coming and it was amazing to see him realising the potential I knew he and McLaren had. He's won twice more this season so far, and both times he was ahead by a country mile at the chequered flag. Aside from that first ever win, though, his other impressive performances this year haven't quite evoked the same emotion as my previous examples. That sense that he's overcoming disadvantages and delivering even when the odds are stacked against him just isn't there for me. Why is that?

There's no denying that he's a skilled driver. Three wins in a season with 7 different race winners (6 of whom have won multiple races) isn't too bad at all. He's also been relatively consistent throughout the year, never finishing a race outside the points. He's even been able to adapt to a range of tracks and weather conditions. For example, he finished P6 after the rain and chaos of Brazil, which threw off even some of the other skilled drivers mentioned above like Sainz and Colapinto.

But we're not here to discuss whether or not he's skilled. We're here to discuss whether or not he's an underdog.

Honestly, did you even read the title?

Anyway. Skill doesn't make someone an underdog. I established that earlier. If skill makes someone an underdog, Max Verstappen is probably the underest dog on the current grid, and that's obviously not the case. We need to look into those external factors I mentioned above: things like car, strategy, luck and experience, in comparison to what other drivers have had to work with this year. The less he has, the more of an underdog it makes him.

First and foremost, McLaren's strategies this year have been pretty abysmal. The terrible calls made in instances like the Hungarian Grand Prix and the lack of calls made in instances like Monza lap one have been enough to make me stop supporting McLaren as a team altogether. They insisted that they weren't prioritising the drivers' championship, but with the constructors' practically secured, I honestly find that hard to believe. If it is true, they've been doing a disservice to both drivers: to Lando by not giving proper attention to his very real championship chances, and to Oscar by ordering him to give up positions for Lando and act as a second driver at certain points, apparently for no real reason. Overall, McLaren's strategies have been in Lando's favour at times, but they've rarely been good. It's hard for me to compare McLaren's strategy calls to other teams, though, simply because I don't know enough about other teams' strategy calls. Maybe all the teams have been equally rubbish with strategy this year, so it technically hasn't been putting Lando at a disadvantage. I wouldn't know. If you have any insight on this, let me know and I might make a second, more definitive post about this.

As for luck, Lando has had bouts of both good luck and bad luck so far this year. He had some good luck in Miami, ultimately facilitating his first win, and he had some hard luck in Austria with his collision with Verstappen and Baku with qualifying. I'm not at all suggesting that Lando didn't deserve his first win (honestly, I don't believe that "deserving" matters in this sport at all), but I don't think he would've won that first race without the luck of the safety car, and I'm not sure he would've performed as well as he has without the confidence boost from that first win. With the car he's had this season (and I'll talk about that next), it would've come eventually, but I really do think that momentary burst of luck has been a really important factor in shaping this season for Lando. It has definitely had more of an effect than his moments of poor luck. I think few other lucky instances have had as much of an effect for a team or driver, except maybe Alpine's performance in Brazil.

His car has been a seriously influential factor, too. Of course, no driver's success is all because of the car; the driver and the car always go hand in hand. A less skilled driver can't properly handle a good car (see Pérez) and even a good driver can rarely drag performance that isn't there out of a tractor (see Bottas at Sauber). But, like his luck, the MCL38 has massively facilitated Lando's ability to perform this year. It's a car that has been capable of winning races by over twenty seconds, creating final laps that are reminiscent of Max's dominance last season. That alone begs the question, why has Lando not been performing consistently at that level? Where exactly does the balance of success lie between Lando and his car?

It's definitely worth taking into consideration that top teams this year have certainly given Lando a lot of competition to deal with this year. Even with a dominant car, with around six other drivers able to put up a fight against Lando, he's not in as dominant a position as Max was last year. But there is a difference in skill in certain areas, and it shows in moments like Lando's first lap bottles from pole compared to Max's perfect starts last year, for example. Lando is just not as polished a driver as some of his competitors, and that is something that naturally comes with more experience.

It's hard to say Lando lacks experience, though. 2024 is his fifth season in F1. He's not always had a great car, but now that he does have one, it's clear to see that he knows how to handle it decently well. Compared to Oscar Piastri, though, it doesn't look like his experience is giving him the competitive edge you'd expect. With four years of experience over his teammate, you'd think Lando would be performing at a much higher level, but that just isn't the case. As a quick example, Oscar's average finishing position this season is 4.9. Lando's is only 0.8 higher at 4.1. With that difference in experience, you'd expect a much higher gap in performance... or at least I would. Maybe I'm wrong for that. Let me know.

Overall, I really don't think Lando is at any kind of serious disadvantage that would make it fair to call him an underdog. He has issues thanks to McLaren's strategic blunders, sure, but the rest of his problems are pretty much skill issues. Call me back with the notion of an "underdog narrative" when Ollie Bearman is in the championship fight in a Haas next year.

[sealofarchives]

Hello, could you do a Rottmnt headcanon of what kind of relationship Leo, Raph, Donnie and Mikey would be?

Headcanon: The reader might need 4 rings in the future since they couldn't decide on one turtle. (Requested prompt)

A/N: sorry for bringing up watt/pad again but, I did at least a couple of oneshots towards the reader in a poly relationship with the guys. So I had a bit of deja vu seeing this type of prompt again (probably around 5 years of writing) but anyway...

One last note: It was a bit difficult to understand the wording towards this particular ask. I already had some unpleasant interactions with "those fans" so I hesitated for a bit with this one.

So please double check your asks before sending it because I don't want to end up with another semi-hiatus because of asks that were out of my control...

If this isn't the kind of relationship you're into, then just skip this one.

Leo

He honestly wasn't expecting you to make the first move.

And tbh, he kept pacing around his room by the time the new feelings bonked him on the head. Like "Ooooh no... (Y/N)'s actually really really really cute..."

Surprisingly, he went to Splinter for advice. Part of his soul left his body when the rat man explained the importance of that special relationship in a lovey dovey manner. But, actually listened slowly realizing Splinter's previous relationships ended in failure. Especially with how things are with Splinter and Big Mama.

Its close to the end of the week when you suggest that idea to date all four of them. And you were very much taken back that he's okay with it. Though he can't promise not to be jealous from time to time. But, he and his brothers will make sure not to break your heart and will swear by it.

- More likely to do surprise visits (or alerting you with a text that he's dropping by for a few minutes. sometimes close to an hour or more if he's not really in the mood for a night patrol)

- Accidentally starts light hearted competitions with him and his brothers trying to impress you. He's still gonna be a showboat but tones it down the moment you pretend to ignore him.

- He's a bit insane and brave with the idea of wanting to meet your family members (the ones that you feel comfortable with). Or towards people that have been there for you in those darker times. Aside from April and his future self being close to a guardian figure to Casey Jr. And the brief time he and his family had with Karai, might be the reasons why he wants to reach out more. Mostly starting small though since the mental scar from the Krang and Shredder really changed him as a person.

Its usually Mikey or Donnie that challenge the red slider turtle to a friendly game on winning your affection. And when he's not feeling up to it, he just waits when Raph's turn is over and asks for your TLC (tender loving care).

Despite the horrors, he's still the same ol whiner. And will probably latch on to you with the most saddest eyes. That you're luckily immune to as you hold hands with one of his brothers for the start of the next week. Donnie has used a spray bottle with water at him and still does it even when its not his turn.

Raph

Very confused about the idea and trying to make sense of it.

It might be close to a few weeks where he finally understands. (mainly asking from April because his brothers can make it sound more confusing)

He hasn't really thought that much about the existential dread of the mutant/human relationship until seeing either Leo or Donnie silently anxious about it. Like the alligator snapping turtle is always more focused on keeping his family safe. And with you as a partner (and potential future spouse) being shared with him and the rest of his brothers. Mind Raph is pestering him even more just to say it out loud than just waiting for you to lead the relationship.

He'll eventually get used to it and given his oldest brother status. Takes it with ease being more patient compared to their high energy.

- Doesn't realize he acts like a "proper gentleman" (or gentleturtle as Donnie would say) when Raph opens the door for you while you're carrying boxes or something. Or offers to help you with the heavy lifting. Even Splinter calls him out on that behavior.

- When its his turn dating you, you get immediate "dibs" on everything. He plays very innocent with you but on his brothers. They always work together on a prank back at him for being annoying about it.

- Tends to look at your hands sometimes. He blushes thinking about how soft it feels around his face and lightly tracing around where its safe to touch his spiky shell.

While he always has good intentions, his brothers heavily hate the 'chaperone or third wheel checking in on the date idea'.

- It's mostly brought at least once a month and the trio usually try to tell you ahead of time before it happens again.

He'll be slightly grumpy whenever the trio share a single brain cell about a really stupid thing that he won't get.

- And he'll whine for a bit if you end up taking their side so, just take his side to save him from another wrinkle on his Raph chasm.

Donnie

He's silently making a fuss about it during the first month.

And a bit at himself, for waiting so long to ask you out. Before you went ahead with the bold move of "I don't want you guys to fight over me so... Is it okay if I date all four of you?"

It takes him a long while to get used to it. Or when Dr Feelings notices the softshell turtle not being open and honest about this relationship with you.

However once he's fully settled in, a very charming and laidback sort of relationship.

- I always get the vibe he uses 'dearest or darling' as his term of affection towards you. (His brothers used to tease him about it but, on days where bad luck decided to give this turtle a break and more on them. They're pleading for your help and whether you want to add fuel to that fire. That's on you)

- To me, he has that dramatic hopeless romantic energy. The only difference he pulls it off better than the dense couples in rom com movies/shows. With the amount of words he knows, at least a few or almost all of his compliments at you will send your heart into a flutter.

- At least every now and then, he'll try to dazzle you with something. Either one of his incredible inventions or surprising you with your favorite thing. (He'll boldly insist he was a step ahead getting it as a surprise. Even though his brothers actually chipped in to avoid another "The Purple Game" incident)

He sort of has a friendly rivalry with Leo on trying to make you laugh.

- If he starts to gloat about it, especially winning with the claim "Told you I was the funniest."

You kissing the softshell turtle's lips will instantly shut him down. use that power wisely

He unfortunately has jealousy issues by the time his turn is up.

- Like pretending to give the cold shoulder until you need help with something he's an expert at.

Mikey

Very much the mature one taking this relationship seriously.

Even though it took a few days with Donnie's help to get a better understanding of your idea of the poly relationship.

Dr Feelings and Dr Delicate Touch are working overtime because of these dumb dumbs sometimes.

Despite that, absolutely the sweetest turtle boyfriend. (and best future turtle husband material out of the four of them)

- While he has the Lou Jitsu charm, Mikey's bundle of sunshine is a whole another level. You can't help but, slowly break into a smile from his toothy grin.

- If you're the type who takes a long while to warm up to pda. He'll mostly stick to handholding and ask whenever you want a hug or kiss from him. (He's definitely more warm as a result of the mystic fire-based energy and ninpo that just naturally went with the flow towards him. So you sometimes fall asleep on his shoulder without realizing it)

- More likely to make any boring task you dread doing into a fun adventure. You both have matching hats from a previous grocery trip and pretended it was a mission from one of the Jupiter Jim comics.

His brothers were totally not jelly about it.

Very much tries to hide his embarrassment from his brothers suggesting 'better date ideas' to the best of his ability. He glared a few times at Raph with the chaperone idea. The usual youngest not getting along with the oldest brother sort of deal. So whenever you're around, the biggest sign is a strained smile on his face while lying that everything is okey-dokey.

- He almost clamped his shell shut when Splinter immediately disapproved the ideas with something even more embarrassing.

The only downside is he might go to some extreme lengths with how stubborn his brothers act.

- So you might need additional help from Splinter or April to prevent a new doctor persona along the lines of Dr Chaos.