nineteen ! ✮ re & d:bh mostly . . .i write sometimes ⟡
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❝𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒐𝒓 𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒏. . .❞
── .✦ summary
⟢ you meet a man at a coffee shop for what seems like the first time, but maybe isn’t. inspired by “where or when” by laufey.
── .✦ word count:
⟢ 442!
── .✦ warnings:
⟢ i wrote this when i should’ve been sleeping so… proceed with caution. :3
The blond stranger looks at you like he’s loved you for as long as he’s lived, like he knows everything there is to know about you. His eyes gaze into yours, wandering into that beautiful yet vast abyss. If your best friend were here, they’d say he was looking at you as if you had hung the moon and the stars themselves.
Little did you know that you were looking at him in the same way without even realizing it.
It’s so strange because you can’t help but feel a sense of déjà vu when you’re with him, as if this isn’t your first time meeting. His smile is so familiar and warm to you, and you could’ve sworn you’ve seen him in that jacket before, but you can’t quite remember where or when.
The boy you now know as Leon quickly charmed his way into your life with goofy jokes and a precious smile, eager to please and be around you. You familiarize yourselves with one another, learning more and more about each other as the days go on. Days turn into weeks, and weeks turn into months, and eventually, you go on your first date. Then your second. Then your third… and so on.
Some time had passed when you finally explained to him the way you felt. Every day with him felt like you had already lived it before. Not in a bad way, of course, but as if you had simply forgotten it. The blond then made it known to you that due to an accident a year ago, you had severe amnesia and had completely forgotten the love of your life — whom you had become engaged to just days before the incident.
Although the whole ordeal was hard for him to cope with and heal from, he tried his best and searched for you everywhere, pulling every string and gathering all of his connections to reconnect with the one he loved once more.
The day Leon found you at that coffee shop was the day he felt his time and effort were worth it. He finally got to see you after so long, and he couldn’t risk losing you again. It almost killed the both of you last time.
He introduced himself for what was truly the second time, focusing on your features and familiar expressions. He immediately felt as if this was the world giving him a second chance, and he couldn’t mess things up. But once you smiled at him, he knew he had you back.
And whether you knew it or not, he was so grateful for the chance to fall in love with you again.
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𝑴𝑨𝑺𝑻𝑬𝑹𝑳𝑰𝑺𝑻
⟡ — blurb, ✦ — fic, ₊˚⊹ — fluff, . ݁˖ — angst
𝑳𝑬𝑶𝑵 𝑲𝑬𝑵𝑵𝑬𝑫𝒀
⟢ where or when ⟡₊˚⊹
𝑪𝑳𝑨𝑰𝑹𝑬 𝑹𝑬𝑫𝑭𝑰𝑬𝑳𝑫
⟢ nothing yet!
𝑱𝑰𝑳𝑳 𝑽𝑨𝑳𝑬𝑵𝑻𝑰𝑵𝑬
⟢ nothing yet!
𝑪𝑶𝑵𝑵𝑶𝑹 (𝑹𝑲800)
⟢ nothing yet!
𝑲𝑨𝑹𝑨 (𝑨𝑿400)
⟢ nothing yet!
── .✦ info!
#leon kennedy x reader#claire redfield x reader#jill valentine x reader#connor x reader#rk800 x reader#kara x reader#ax400 x reader#resident evil#detroit become human#masterlist
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𝑨𝑩𝑶𝑼𝑻 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑾𝑹𝑰𝑻𝑬𝑹 !
hiii! i’m ren and welcome to my blog! i’m happy to have you here. if you’re curious to know a little more about me, this is where you’ll find some bits.
── .✦ my biggest interests typically revolve around videogames, such as: resident evil, detroit: become human, tomb raider and so on! but i also like stuff like sanrio, twilight, dc, until dawn, horror games in general, etc.
── .✦ three fun facts: i have a pet rabbit (he’s the sweetest!), i absolutely LOVE night drives and i love to go stargazing!
── .✦ i’ve loved writing since i was very young, but creating and posting “x reader” fics is a new concept to me, so i’m quite intrigued. i hope i can create content that i enjoy writing and you enjoy reading! :)
── .✦ some of my other hobbies include cosplaying, making jewelry, playing videogames, journaling and listening to music! (i love the smiths.)
that’s all i’ve got for now. :) if you have any questions or want to request something, my messages and asks are always open! see you soon. <3
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𝑰𝑵𝑭𝑶 ⟡ ݁₊ .
just some answers for a few simple questions! ⋆˙⟡
── .✦ what/who do you write for?
⟢ 𝑹𝑬𝑺𝑰𝑫𝑬𝑵𝑻 𝑬𝑽𝑰𝑳
⟢ leon s. kennedy
⟢ claire redfield
⟢ jill valentine
⟢ 𝑫𝑬𝑻𝑹𝑶𝑰𝑻: 𝑩𝑬𝑪𝑶𝑴𝑬 𝑯𝑼𝑴𝑨𝑵
⟢ connor (rk800)
⟢ kara (ax400)
wanna know if i’m open to writing for another character or fandom? simply just ask! i’m mostly comfortable with re and d:bh characters, but i can try my best to do others for you. ⊹₊⋆
── .✦ what will you write?
⟢ a lot of things! i’m pretty open as long as it doesn’t go against any of my rules.
⟢ fluff, angst, au’s/crossovers and so on are always on the table!
── .✦ what will you not write?
⟢ i will not write incest, non-con, minor(s) x reader or anything along the lines of racism, homophobia or pedophilia under any circumstances.
⟢ smut. i fear i’m more of a fluff and angst kind of gal. :)
── .✦ quick note!
⟢ i have a full-time job and other responsibilities that take up a lot of my time. because of this, i am prone to slow uploads for fics and such. however, blurbs and headcanons shouldn’t take as long! happy reading!
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hyperpigmentation meme but it's cleon and sherry! watch till the end it's worth it
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Put another OC in the x reader tag, I dare you...
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Leon Kennedy is in fact my wife for ur information
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—Ties that bind
Summary: Your coworker turns into your boyfriend and soon enough decides to change that as well.
Tags: Established Relationship mostly, fluff, romance, slight angst
Words: 1k
⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹
You never expected your relationship with Leon Scott Kennedy to be anything special.
In fact, it started off as something messy and fragile. He had just come out of a rough breakup, left by his girlfriend when he made the move to Raccoon City. He was hurt and lost, but you were there, the sweet receptionist who always knew when he needed a pick-me-up. Your smile and kind gestures were a balm for his bruised heart.
Leon wasn’t typically a coffee drinker—the bitterness was something he normally avoided like the plague. But when you started bringing him a cup during his busiest hours, he found himself sipping it anyway. Your coffee was somehow different, sweeter, just like you. He could never bring himself to turn down something you made just for him, so he kept drinking it, even if it wasn’t his usual choice.
He finally gathered the courage to strike up a real conversation with you during one of those busy days. He fiddled nervously with his pen, glancing at the freshly brewed coffee you left on his desk. "Do you usually drink coffee?" he stammered out, wincing internally at how awkward he sounded.
You smiled, launching into a story about a small café you frequented that had the perfect blend. He listened intently, eyes wide in surprise when you casually invited him to visit it with you sometime. That’s how your first date happened: in a cozy vintage café filled with the smell of fresh coffee and old books. It felt right sitting there with him, sharing stories and laughter. Despite the chaos in Leon’s life, you clicked instantly. For the first time in a long while, he felt like he could start looking forward instead of lingering on the past.
Soon enough, you found yourself spending more time at his apartment than your own. It was full of little pieces of you now: the plushie he won for you at the carnival, a matching mug for your morning coffee sessions. His space felt cozier with your things in it, and Leon loved it. He cherished the way his home had become a reflection of the two of you together.
But lately, something felt off. Leon had become distant—no messages, no calls, not even a quick voice note. He hadn’t mentioned any trips or special missions at work, so you couldn’t help but worry. Maybe he just needed some space after a tough week, you told yourself, but that didn’t stop the gnawing ache in your chest. You decided to visit him at work, only to hear from his colleagues that he was fine, business as usual. Yet, the coffee you left for him the previous day sat untouched and cold, the sweet note you’d attached to it now crumpled on the floor. It stung.
Your heart sank even further when you found a note on your desk, written in Leon’s familiar scrawled handwriting: Come over tonight. No explanation, no hint of what was going on. It felt like a breakup note. You spent the entire day with a heavy weight in your chest, trying to prepare yourself for the worst.
Leon, on the other hand, had no idea. He’d left work early, practically racing home to get everything ready. He had been planning a surprise for days, avoiding you so he wouldn’t spoil it. He was a bit clueless, sure, but his intentions were pure. He wanted everything to be perfect.
When you knocked on his door that evening, you could barely keep it together. Your eyes were red and puffy, tears streaming down your face as you gripped your bag tightly. The second Leon saw you, his face fell. He didn’t understand why you looked so heartbroken. “If you’re going to break up with me, just make it quick,” you choked out, trying to keep your voice steady.
Panic shot through Leon like a jolt of electricity. Without thinking, he pulled you into his arms, holding you close and cradling your head against his chest. “Honey, no,” he whispered, his voice thick with desperation. “Shh, please. I would never break up with you.”
You pushed back slightly, looking up at him with tear-filled eyes. “Then why haven’t I heard from you in three days, Leon? I thought you were avoiding me.”
He froze, realization dawning on him. “Three days?” He hadn’t even noticed how much time had passed. Between work and his secret planning, he’d lost track completely. “I’m so sorry, sunshine,” he murmured, brushing a tear away with his thumb. “I didn’t mean to leave you hanging like that. I was just... I was planning something. I promise it wasn’t on purpose.”
You blinked in confusion, but before you could respond, he gently took your hand and led you inside. The hallway was decorated with the picture frames you had helped him put up, little snapshots of happy memories. He guided you to the living room, where the smell of freshly brewed coffee filled the air.
The room was dimly lit, the soft glow of candles casting a warm light over the coffee table. On it, he had set out your favorite snacks, the matching mugs filled with steaming coffee, and a photo album. But it was the small velvet box placed delicately on top that made your breath catch in your throat.
Leon turned to you, his expression soft and full of love. “How could I ever leave the woman I want to marry?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
You stared at him, tears welling up in your eyes again, but this time they were tears of joy. He wasn’t pulling away; he was pulling you closer than ever. The realization hit you like a wave, and you couldn’t help but laugh, even as you cried.
Leon stepped closer, cupping your face in his hands. “I’m sorry I made you worry,” he murmured. “I wanted it to be a surprise. I wanted it to be perfect.”
You wrapped your arms around his neck, burying your face in his shoulder. “You’re an idiot, Leon,” you said, but there was no anger in your voice, only relief and love.
He chuckled softly, pressing a kiss to your temple. “I know,” he agreed. “But I’m your idiot.”
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L. KENNEDY, C. REDFIELD, C. OLIVEIRA X READER (SEPARATE)
ೃ⁀➷ sypnosis; general relationship/ domestic hc’s
ೃ⁀➷ warnings; none!
ೃ⁀➷ author’s note; hi giys my requests r open😝 request please… pls☹️, idc if some of these r ooc in my world they are very much in character i love them all so much oh my god, didn’t include much abt their jobs bcos i wany thrm all to be happy okay..
C. OLIVEIRA
have you seen them photos of them big beefy scary men underneath like thick hello kitty or very feminine blankets? yeah that’s him
SNORES. SNORES SO LOUDLY. he wraps his arms around you instinctively at night and his grip is so tight you genuinely can’t escape his warmth or snoring
on the topic of that, he runs warm. he’s a genuine heater in winter - cold? cuddle up to him, saving money on the heating. win win!
whenever he comes home from the gym or wherever and he spots you watching one of your shows on the tv, he’ll stand behind the couch and watches it himself before eventually sitting down besides you. he can’t help it
every friday IS date night. whether that be something as simple as dinner at home together or something as extravagant as going to a fancy restaurant, the two of you are spending time together. he will make sure of that
going off of my previous hc’s, he can’t bake for life of him. cooking he’s rather okay-ish with all the simple stuff but baking? alone? absolutely not
the two of you decided to bake something for one of your date nights once. you asked him to pour flour and cocoa powder into the wet ingredients and turn the mixer on - he forgot to put the splashguard on and turned it right up to the fastest setting
safe to say your kitchen, and carlos, looked as if they’d just came out of winter wonderland
gives off the biggest girl dad vibes. just imagine him letting his little girl put random clips and bows in his hair jshwiaianwi omg
he has such a soft spot for strays. has genuinely brought home a puppy before because he saw it laying out by the dumpster before and couldn’t leave it alone
he’s all over you. CONSTANTLY. arm over your shoulder, hand on your hip. he can’t get enough of you
L. KENNEDY
he wakes up a few minutes earlier than he actually needs to (when he does actually fall asleep) just stare at you and how peace you look asleep
you’ve asked him to help you with your hair so many times to the point he’s genuinely become an absolute professional at it. the moment you give him that look he tells you to turn around and starts working his magic
keeps photos of you in his wallet, he knows deep down its rather risky but can’t help himself
in the instances that he does fall asleep before you (extremely rare) and you cuddle up against his side, his arm automatically wraps around you. it’s like muscle memory at this point
has your name engraved into his key chain on his keys
ALWAYS helps out with dinner whenever he’s home, despite you constantly telling him to get the fuck out and relax for a bit. ends up in him dancing with you in the kitchen
his showers are like, the ideal temperature- perfect for you to just hop in with him. he never minds and rather welcomes it
ALWAYS SURPRISES YOU FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY!! goes absolutely FULL out, waking you up with kisses on your shoulder, an expensive outfit you’ve had your eye on for a while, extravagant dinner and a nice little stroll in the park at night. switches it up every year so you never know what’s coming
has you as his emergency contact for sure
plays old rock songs in the car. causes you to make fun of him and call him an old american dad - even though you definitely don’t actually like the song. definitely
C. REDFIELD
i just KNOW this man can be out sass you during arguements. growing up with claire certainly prepared him for that
he’s gone quite most of the time, so he makes sure to spend as much time as possible with you whenever he can
recently saw this thing where it was an ex military with his kids, where he’s shouting out orders like a drill sergeant during bath time. chris. it just screams chris.
— “I’M PUTTING SHAMPOO IN YOUR HAIR, DO NOT OPEN YOUR EYES! DO YOU UNDERSTAND?”
— “OK!”
just imagine hearing that every time it’s his turn with bath time. just constant giggles and shouts (if there r kids ofc)
you and claire are CLOSE. chris has made sure of that, definitely introduced you two once he knew it was getting serious
regrets it at times, as whenever something happens at home with the two of you - no matter how stupid the arguement may hve been claire is always the first to know. and always the first to knock some sense into her brother
wears hawaiian dad shirts in summer. for a fact.
like carlos, runs SO WARM. feels as though he’s an actual bear and has genuine fur on him keeping him so warm
sleeps flat on his back, arms by his sides. usually a very light sleeper but at times absolutely nothing will wake him up. you’re free to roll around all over him, strew your legs out over him and he’ll simply stay lying on his back like always. hands by his sides and the only indication of him actually being alive being the rise and fall of his chest
his appetite is absolutely outrageous. you best believe whatever you make is being absolutely devoured, he loves your cooking. sometimes all he needs is some home cooked dinner to put a smile on his face
he will genuinely let you do almost anything to him. you wanna massage his back? sure. do a face mask on him? alright, but no photos. wax a patch of hair on his leg? did it before, never letting you do it again. he has a hard time saying no to you - he’s lost too much people, he needs to make the most of his time with you
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his big wet eyes and loser boy personality have captivated me
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Each Era of Leon and their first date with you
WARNINGS: Fluff, Fem!Reader
RE2,RE4R, Damnation, Infinite Darkness, Vendetta, RE6, Death Island
(not proof read was bored at my dads and did this quickly lmao)
RE2:
Leon sighed as he looked at himself in the mirror for the 100th time, his keys jingling as he pocketed them.
He swore his heart was going to explode with how fast it was beating, the idea of a first date still seemed stranger after everything he had been through.
His fist shook as he knocked on the door to your house, the stained glass window was decorated with flowers. The walkway lined with small flowers was the perfect family home, something he again assumed would be something to give away after he signed his life away to the government.
Your outfit was different from what you wore at the office, your frame decorated in a soft flowery dress, "Hey, you look nice" you spoke sweetly the door shutting behind you.
He couldn't stop the blush that lingered on his cheeks, the smile that grew impossibly wide as he linked his arm with yours. It felt nice; the weight of your arm in his...it felt right. "So do you" he stuttered out, cringing at the shakiness of his voice.
Once he finally settled in the restaurant, his nervous chatter reduced. You smiled as he talked enthusiastically about your interests, offering pointers and tips on how to help with the garden. Even offering his own help to you.
He somehow stumbled his way through the date for you to offer him a second one, departing the night with a simple kiss on his growing red cheeks.
RE4R:
After everything he's been through, he fought hard with himself to hold the slight shake in his hands.
Checking himself over briefly before going out, his outfit was casual but practical. A new warm jacket draped over his form since he lost his other one in Spain.
His knock is firmer, he's hand tucked in his pockets as he waits for you to leave your house. Not looking at the door, only looking at his feet.
It's only when he sees you his breath falters, your hair curled nicely falling across your shoulders, your dress showing off your form perfectly. "wow" is all he managed to get out, his smile growing at the dust of pink that showed up.
He's cracking jokes the entire evening, small puns here and there as he checks the menu for what he wants.
Pays for the whole thing, maybe would let you pay for the tip.
You already knew he was in for a second date..he didn't even need to ask
Infinite Darkness:
Most relaxed out of all of them, he was confident he looked good, opting for a shirt and jeans. His trusty leather jacket thrown over his shoulders.
He's looking at the door when he knocks, his body is still stiff but there's no obvious signs of being nervous
Smiling before you even made eye contact, hand on your waist as he leads you away.
Opting for a more low-key casual date in case he gets called away on a mission so he takes you to a coffee shop.
Paying for everything again, I'm sure he has so much money and no one to spoil.
But more touchy than the other ones, hands on your lower back as he guides you to a table, small touches of his fingers as he walks next to you.
If he's feeling bold enough he would kiss you, his hand weaving in your hair as he brings you closer.
Damnation:
Despite his grumpier tone during this film and his drinking habits in full force. He would try and do everything in his power to show up sober and not hungover.
This would mean he's slightly more nervous, not just because of the lack of sleep since he didn't drink the night before but also because it's first time he's been open with someone like this for a while.
Would be the easiest person to deal with at the start of the night, very closed off when he picks you up. However he does manage to compliment you though, his cheeks blushing when you return the favour
His humor is dry having lost the will to keep going it became more depressing but you didn't seem to mind. He instead started to view you as a light in the darkness.
So much so that he doesn't want the night to end. Dragging it out by going on a walk buying hot drinks and enjoying the simple conversations.
This is when his guard slips and you see past the tuff exterior he built to survive the harsh world.
His kiss at the end of the night is simple, but leave an impression on you along with a promise for more
Vendetta:
We all know he's the most depressed out of all the eras, so he wouldn't really care too much in his appearance. He's just shocked you even took enough interest.
I imagine it's more after the events of the movie where he's slightly on the brighter side.
He wouldn't talk about his job, using the date as an excuse to get away from it.
Very touchy, probably the only time he's realized how touched starved he actually is.
Drinking, he would probably try to avoid it during the night. He doesn't want to give you the wrong idea but towards the end he eventually gives in..not quiet content enough to go sober.
His kiss is sloppy but meaningful; a lot of his unspoken feelings about you given in the last moment with the kiss..leaves you begging for more.
You feel like you still don't really know him but know him enough to want to go for a second date
RE6:
Defiantly had a drink before he left, his outfit is scruffy and doesn't put too much thought into it. At least he put aftershave on though!
His knock on the door is firm and confident, smiling instantly when he sees you and almost escorts you to the car.
Opted for a nice restaurant making sure he booked a booth so he could have this moment without other people looking at him and you.
His conversations are mainly about your interests again, dealing out a couple of his own hobbies without giving away a lot of what he does...not fully trusting you to handle that information yet.
Keeps his drinking to the minimum, wanting to actually remember the events.
Drives you home but you stay in the car a bit longer, the conversation seemingly flowing a lot easier in this situation.
Kisses you passionately again, cradling your face as he does it.
DEATH ISLAND:
He's more nervous this time around, putting in more thought into his clothing..scolding himself for being so nervous.
Sober when he picks you up and during the entire date.
Is the most open with you off the bat about his interests but is still blunt with his job.
Picks you up on his bike but tells you before hand so you can dress appropriately.
Smiling the entire time he's driving you to the location, he loves how your hands tighten around him as he goes faster. The feeling of you pressed so closely to him
His heart melts when you exclaim how much fun it is!
Very big on touching, but always asking permission before he does.
Kisses you after you get off the bike, not driving away until he sees you have gotten in the house safe.
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pov: you’re scrolling trying to find a cute little fluffy fanfic to read but everything you get is smut
no smut hate, i just want to giggle :(
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Class of '95
Leon Kennedy x f!Reader
The tie rests in his pocket, feeling his throat constrict enough by the memories from a lifetime ago as Leon stands in his old high-school gymnasium. His breathing exercises carry him through the evening until his breath knocks out of him when he sees you again.
warnings/tags: older Leon. allusions to alcoholism. fluff. high school sweethearts.
word count: 3.5k
a/n: i dont know if anyone has seen '10 Years' but this heavily inspired from that especially the song 'Never Had'. that and 'From Eden by Hozier'. also i know thats infinite darkness Leon in the banner but i had more death island Leon in mind. anyways, happy reading! this may be lame but its all i have to offer
Leon is glad he decided to forgo the tie, a last-minute decision he made sitting in the shadows of his car, staring blankly at his reflection in the rear-view mirror. The silence had been too loud without the car in ignition, occupied by a sudden itch to grip the steering wheel and drive off, daunted too much by the expanse of his old high-school. He feels like a fraud returning, no longer finding any specks of the person who used to wander down the halls, sit in the classes and occupy the benches in the cafeteria, his carefree demeanour carrying him through the days.
He could hear the muted drawl of music bleeding from the doors, the balloons and décor scattered across the entrance with a banner reading ‘Welcome Back Class of ‘95’ in greeting. God, that made him feel old, the constant ache in his back a constant reminder of the toll the years had taken on him.
The walk in isn’t so terrible, wiping the sweat from his hand as he comes across the registration desk, a kindly looking face asking for his name. He nearly laughs at the ‘hello my name is’ sticker, the marker squeaking as he scribbles on his name and pastes it on his jacket right above his heart.
Leon feels his fingers twitch when someone shouts his name in disbelief, turning around to blink in the face of two men who were previously occupied with their own conversation. He recognizes them in an instant, his teammates from the football team. Youthful faces drowned by wrinkles, grey sprinklings in their hair and torsos full of muscle now replaced with a softening belly; but their smiles are still the same. He walks over to them, gripping their hands firmly in handshakes, disbelief on their faces when they register that it is Leon.
Where have you been, man? We thought you were dead! Wow, it’s been so long.
It’s all the same set of questions and remarks he gets when he tours the gymnasium floor. Yes, he can’t believe it’s been so long. No, he’s just been busy with work so no time for a missus or kids. Ah, what about work? He doesn’t want to bore anyone with the boring mumbo jumbo. Yeah, he’s disappointed the police thing didn’t work out but what can you do?
His words soon start to feel rehearsed, like an actor on scene waiting for his cue, a smile plastered on his face to dazzle the audience. Leon does a fine job of it, relaxing when he realizes that it’s easy with these people who are more eager to talk about their wives, husbands and kids. He feels envy grow within him as his eyes get stuck on their greying features, the softness of their added age and the glittering bands of their rings.
It feels disorienting almost seeing his classmates living the life he had pictured for himself long ago, a life he didn’t realize he wanted so much now. Maybe there was something about coming stunningly close to death as of late, not that it wasn’t usual for him. Perhaps the one too many knocks against his head had finally straightened out his disarrayed thoughts into linearity.
The praises that are aimed his way are quickly dismissed by Leon, shrugging all the ‘you look really fit’s and ‘your hair is in great condition, between the kids and job I don’t have the time to dye it’ like bullets clattering to the ground, puncturing him in the aftermath. He has nothing to show for his life save for the scar marks and the unhealed bullet wounds littering his body. Their voices would not carry a tone of wistfulness if they truly knew his reality.
Leon needs a breather. And like a dog to a bone, he retreats to the bar in the corner.
It’s mostly empty, smiling politely at the couple that walks away with their beverages. He leans against the bar, grateful for the coolness underneath his palm as he orders his drink. Whiskey on the rocks with a twist.
Leon struggled with the concept of autonomy for the majority of his 20s and 30s, anger rippling through his system with his teeth grit whenever he would be dispatched at a moment's notice. Every reverberation of his trusty Matilda was doused in casual rage of the irony of his helplessness in deciding his fate as he ensured the normalcy of those back home. Mission success after success that Leon paid for with his freedom, his aching body and greying years, mourning the naive version of himself that saw the world with a gleaming lense.
He accepted his fate soon enough, made peace with the life he knew he was too much of a coward to leave, courtesy of his survivor's guilt or hero complex, he doesn't know. He really doesn't want to find out. Perhaps it’s the shift in his reality, a peek into a life outside where he isn’t vital to the national or global security. It tugs at the strings of his heart when he realises there’s serenity here. This thought does little to alleviate the deep ache within his chest as he watches his old classmates.
This is difficult for the reasons Leon never prepared himself for, bitterness flooding him as he mulls over the possibility of the life he could have had. Would he be like everyone else here? Would smiling come easy, a wedding ring on his finger and pictures of his kids ready on his phone, proudly brandishing it out on a moment’s notice? What does he have to show for himself apart from the scars and wounds that litter his body?
The bartender slides Leon’s drink in front of him, parting with a polite smile. He stares at the amber liquid, ice floating on its surface and the itch in the back of his head that he had tried hard to bury returned. Leon grabs the glass, swirling it for good measure and brings it up to his lips. The whiskey barely grazes his lips when a familiar sounding laugh freezes him in place. His pulse flutters, a statue in poise, back turned to the crowd when the sweet noise filters through again to his ear.
And suddenly Leon feels himself thrown back to the year 1995 on his own personal time machine, bubbling up memories that he had long forgotten, evoking emotions he thought he didn’t know how to feel anymore. The laugh is light and airy, so gentle and delicate, encompassing his entire being, intoxicating him once again like it did when he heard it for the first time during chemistry class.
He remembers the softness of your skin when you two had accidentally bumped hands reaching for the popcorn, blushing bright in the darkened theatre before he gathered the courage to hold your hand firmly, never letting go again.
Leon swears he can taste the butter on your lips when you had bravely kissed him on the doorstep of your home, a grin permanently latching onto his face. His ears ring with the sound of your cheers from the stands, louder than anyone, wildly waving your homemade posters for his games, always present come rain or hail.
Leon is almost afraid to turn, not wanting to disturb the way his mind has painted you in beautiful strokes, conjuring up a picture so vivid that he feels he can touch if he reaches out. But curiosity gets the better of him, lowering the untouched drink down with a thunk and slowly turning around. Leon forgets how to breathe for a moment. Is it in, in? Out in? No, it’s in and out. He tries to catch up to missed breaths, eyes hung onto you.
You look just as beautiful as the day he last remembers seeing you. It overwhelms him. Time clearly passed you by but not in the same way it had him; brutish, barbaric and aggressively tossing him on the hard concrete. No, time had been gentle with you, tenderly caressing you in its palm, nuzzling you softly as it swept you with it.
Your smile is still the same Leon fell in love with, proud at having being the receiving end of it quite often, adoring the way you still throw your head back a little when you laugh. There is an air of elegance about you, evidence of the years that you had culminated, experiences under your belt that had transformed you into the person that was standing just a little distance away from him.
Leon watches you intently as your eyes flicker over to where he’s standing, words fumbling from your lips as you jerk your head back up and do a double take. Your eyes blink furiously, widening in surprise as though you never expected to see him in a million years. You stumble off an excuse to the people you were talking to, eyes not daring to stray away from him.
His drink is long forgotten, hands both nestled in his pockets, heart thrumming in his chest as he waits for you to make your way to him. There’s a certain peculiarity in how you do; a strange mix of shyness and disbelief. Your steps are light and airy, features softening as Leon grows more vivid in your line of sight. There’s something familiar in the way you walk to him, something akin to how he watched you descend the stairs of your house as he had waited at the bottom, staring at you in awe with a corsage gripped tight in his hands. Even in the picture your mom had snapped, Leon was still looking at you.
Warmth floods him when you come to a stop in front of him, glee on both his and Leon’s face, hidden beneath timidness. He takes the first leap.
“Hey,” Leon smiles.
You laugh and it is oh so sweet, stronger than a shot of espresso. “Hi.” You tuck a strand of hair behind your ear.
What do you say anyways to the most important person in your youth who you thought would be a constant? The breakup had been difficult but inevitable with the two very different paths you and Leon had picked out for yourselves. It was terribly heart aching with fingers gripping each other’s tightly, silent tears running down your face as you tried to inscribe every forehead kiss from Leon to memory with the sun setting in the far-off distance. Come morning he would be long gone, both of you deciding that it would be unbearable to start a new day without the sun shining on them both.
What do you say after all these years have passed shaping you into different versions of the same person you once knew so long ago?
“It’s really good to see you Leon.” Well you could say that for starters.
A small puff of air leaves Leon’s throat, glancing down at the floor momentarily before looking back into your eager eyes. His heart clenches as he notices they still glow. “It’s good to see you too.” An understatement truly, it’s magical to see you again. He thought he never would again, his mind drifting to you in his moments of darkness, clinging on to the memories as they would rejuvenate him. His sentiment is a lot more loaded than yours, he realises, his guardian angel now materialised in front of his eyes.
You flit about, mess with your hair, pull it behind your ears, trying to look at him whole with little glances. “I uh...I thought you didn’t attend these things.”
“I didn’t know there were these things to attend,” He shrugged. Its true, it’s quite hard to reach him when none of his old contact numbers or emails work. Leon’s a hard man to reach. It was a surprise to him when Hunnigan had all but slammed the plane ticket and the print out of his old high-school reunion on his desk. He didn’t even bother asking how she got the information, feeling scrutinised under her hard gaze and her You need a break too, Leon. He’ll buy her favourite bottle of wine first thing back.
“Well you know it is hard to reach you.” You tilt your head to the side, teasing glinting in your eyes. “No phone number, no address, no email either. Its almost like you vanished off the face of the earth.”
Leon feels the tips of his ears grow hot, suddenly feeling a bit ashamed. You continue on with a casual shrug of your shoulders, “Every text or email I sent you bounced back so I just thought you didn’t want to catch up.”
That turns him into a statue. What? “You tried to contact me?”
A streak of blush colours your cheeks. “I mean not that frequently. Just like a couple of years back I guess? I don’t know I just did it on a whim. The text didn’t go through and neither did the email so...you know I thought you didn’t want to be contacted.”
He didn’t know what to do with the information that you thought of him while he thought of you. He never imagined that you would actually try to reach out to him, why would you? Leon assumed you’d be well settled in your life now; husband, kids, the white picket fence. Isn’t that what the two of you would fantasise about, sharing whispered giggles huddled under the sheets?
But there’s curiosity gnawing at his bones. He’s noticed the empty ring finger on your left hand about how you’ve spent ten minutes chatting with him here and no man has slipped his hand against your waist. You’re here, talking to him, in no rush to meet anyone else. Leon feels his fingers twitch, he would never let you out of his sight.
He blinks, an easy smile settling on his lips, gazing at you softly at your confession. “I thought about you a lot too.” He wants to thread his fingers through your hair, tucking away the strands. “I’m sorry I went so far away.”
You shudder, pursing your lips and looking away. You see to be shrugging your shoulders again. Cute. “It’s fine. Life gets in the way sometimes. I’m just glad you’re okay.”
The music doesn’t bother Leon anymore. He likes it, foot tapping with the beat, letting the soft tune wash over him. The silence is nice albeit heavy, he imagines there’s a barrage of questions on the tip of your tongue. A gentle giggle pulls his attention to you, “What?”
“Nothing. Its just,” You shake your head, “I don’t know if I should be concerned or not over how little the gymnasium has changed since we went here.”
“Oh,” His eyes sweep the entire place, amused at your remark. “You’re right. I don’t imagine they’ve been very enthusiastic about interior decoration .”
“They really have not,” You marvel. You seem to get lost in your thoughts, pulling your back straighter. “You think they changed the bleachers outside in the field?”
Leon locks eyes with you, unrelenting stare as he grapples with the meaning behind your words. He spent a lot of time with you on them; shyly running to you after practice, talking with you there for hours, glancing at you cheering him on during games, the summer day you two had spent there laughing and kissing before Leon had scratched the two of yours initial on its surface, sweetly outlining it with a heart. It’s not cheesy sweetheart if you’re blushing into my neck this hard.
Leon quirks his eyebrow, matching your smile. “Let’s find out.”
The night is cool with clear skies and a soft breeze blowing through. Leon feels ridiculous, not in the stupid sense but in the makes-him-feel-young sense. Your hand is wrapped in his instinctively, your soft palm resting against his with a practiced ease as he tugs you along with him towards the football field. The music thrums away into the background until there’s only the sound of your shared footsteps and your soft laughs echoing in the air. He can’t help but glance at you time and again, marvelling at the soft wrinkles dusting the corner of your eyes.
He doesn’t like it when he has to let your hand go, standing between the stands as the two of you unspokenly begin the search for the same heart shaped mark left years ago in the dim light.
“So uh,” You say standing a little above from him in the bleachers, attention focused on the seats as you try to sound casual, “Did you come alone?”
“Yeah,” He’s quick to reply. “My pet goldfish gets really motion sick on planes.” He pretends to search for a while. “You?”
You hum in reply. “I don’t think ex-husbands are too big on attending their ex-wife’s high-school reunion.”
Leon turns towards you to see you staring at him already, fiddling with your ring-less finger. “Dead?”
“Divorced.”
“When?”
“Few years ago.”
“Why?”
“He got his secretary pregnant.”
Leon blinks, scoffing and surprised at the spark of anger that ignites in him. “What an absolute piece of shit.”
You laugh. “Yeah.”
The two of you go back to searching, a lightness on your shoulders now. He relaxes too, the stiffness disappearing from his back. “I thought a lot about you. Thought you’d have your white picket fence house by now. It’s...why I never reached out to you.”
You bite your lip, smiling at the memory. “It’s okay Leon, really. The white picket fence seems like a lifetime ago now. Seems a bit silly honestly.”
“It’s not what you want?”
“I don’t know. A lot’s changed since we last spoke. I’ve learnt it’s better to let things happen as they are.”
“Not taking chances anymore?”
You look up at him, a sweet smile as you share a knowing look. “No, I’m taking them as they present themselves.”
Leon’s stomach does that flipping motion again, sweat collecting on the back of his neck. He mentally notes to buy Hunnigan the snack she likes so much too. They resume their search, beckoning the other to their spot as they find something funny or worthy to see. It’s fun, his worries melting away as he laughs away the night with you. But that heart is nowhere to be found, tired of squinting.
“Ugh, this low lighting isn’t really helping,” You sigh, trailing back to where he’s stood.
“Maybe some extra help then.” He pats the front of his jacket, digging into his inner pocket and then brandishing out his flip phone nonchalantly. You stare at it for a second, watch him as he flips it open and then burst into laughter.
“What?” He asks in disbelief, watching you wheeze with amusement.
“Wow,” You manage to choke out, “Well no wonder its so hard to reach you. Does your phone even have an email app?”
“It works fine for me,” He grumbles, hoping you can’t see how scarlet he is under the night sky.
“No, no,” You grin at him, pinching his cheeks. “It’s cute.”
Leon almost jumps at your fingers connecting with his cheek, inadvertently leaning into your touch. You still, realisation hitting you of what you’re doing. But you don’t stop. Your fingers splay out, hesitantly cupping the side of his face. Leon watches you carefully, trying his best to control his breathing. You shudder as the bottom of your hand grazes against his stubble, thumb slowly caressing against his skin. Leon shuts his eyes under your soft touch, a sigh leaving his lips.
He holds your wrist, keeping your hand against his cheek, bringing you close to him by your waist. His eyes don’t stray from yours, keeping you in place. Your eyes glaze over, a sheen in them as they collect water.
“Hi.” You whisper.
“Hey, sweetheart.” He whispers back.
“You look old,” You laugh, the sound mixing with a sob.
“So do you.” He hums back, fondly brushing your hair back from your face.
You bury your face in his chest, breathing him in. “Where were you? I waited for you for so long.”
He pulls back to see you properly, tilting your face up by a hand under your chin. He leans in, lips brushing over yours. You push yourself up on your toes, lips connecting with his. You feel so impossibly warm against him, lips slotting against his seamlessly. He breathes you in, tastes you deeply, gripping you against his body like he never plans on letting you go. You gasp against his lips as he steals your breath and noises.
He pulls away just an inch, nuzzling his nose into your cheek, not daring to loosen his hold on you. “Not going anywhere now, sweetheart.”
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