#I'm sorry he's such a dick
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❛ do i have something on my face or why do you keep looking at me like that ? ❜
Atem leaned in and stared. "You do have something on your face." He smirked and flicked him in the forehead. "Don't worry, I got it."
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Ultimately the resolution of Jason and Cass fights comes down to the fact that while he has his own ideals that don't mesh with the bats, Jason can be flexible. DC skipped the whole reconciliation with the family but while he's willing to kill it's generally a means to an end to him, not the whole entire point unless you're talking about Joker. Meanwhile for Cass the question of killing vs not killing is dead serious to her which means any time they're working together and things start going off track it's like:
Jason: Look if we kill this guy we send a message to his boss which makes it easier for us to negotiate with him from a position of power and I just think that-
Cass, snatching one of his guns and pointing it at her own head: Go on, pull the trigger. Kill him. Kill me. Go tell Batman that you let his daughter die to make a negotiation easier. He already let you die so no problem right? You think we should die? You think our life only worthwhile as part of a plan, just because we're killers? Are we doomed? Are we rotten to the core with no hope of redemption? Go on then, kill us and kill part of your soul alongside it. You clearly don't care for it so why are you even trying? Kill yourself along with us, come on Jason let's all just die right?
Jason, slowly backing away: I think you may be projecting a tiny bit so just. Calm down before I call the suicide hotline please.
Cass, slowly lowering the gun and knocking the random henchman unconscious: Yeah that's what I thought, fucking pussy.
Jason: Mm yeah you know what I hate you actually. Fuck this mission I'll just shoot you right now if you're going to be this annoying about it.
Jason, explaining things later to Dick: So I just kept shooting at her until I ran out of bullets and we both calmed down enough to call a truce. We tracked the guy down and didn't kill anyone but I did blow up the batplane just as a last minute screw you. Is she always this uh... intense?
Dick: Yeah, one time I broke up with Barbara and she threw me out a window. She's just like that.
#dc#cassandra cain#jason todd#batfam#dc rambles#dick grayson#it's so funny how jason is like. a mass murderer. and yet he's more of a team player than cass#like yeah he's violent and unpredictable but if you're on the same team with the same temporary goal then you've got decent chances#meanwhile the entire team could be seconds away from dying with the only solution being to kill a guy with a bomb#and if you're on the team with cass she'll spend the last few seconds punching you in the face for trying to kill the evil guy#then disarming the bomb because she's just that annoying#I love her very much <3#i'm jason posting a lot recently sorry jtodd stans for clogging up his tag#I just like the thought of jason dealing with a mini bruce that has none of the baggage of being his dad#so it's just the experience of ramming his head into an annoying brick wall with zero catharsis of confronting your shitty father
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do skully have pokemon?
Pumpkaboo is the obvious one, but y'know, sometimes the obvious one is the right one! (we'll say SUPER SIZE Pumpkaboo, just for fun. big pumpkin for big skeleton boy.) and another person actually also suggested Greavard, which I somehow hadn't considered, but feels so perfect that I feel like I should have. dangit.
(they can also have little Nightmare Suit costumes :D)
#art#twisted wonderland#pokemon#poketwst#twisted wonderland spoilers#lost in the book with nightmare before christmas#hajimari no halloween#(sorry for leaving anon off for a while! i've gotten a rash of spam and i'm gonna wait it out a couple days before turning it back on)#also apologies for the rest of this not really being pokemon related#i don't have anything right now for part 4 of the event so i'm gonna use this space to go off about it#because. oh man.#a sad lack of the scullsman but a FEAST of everyone else#gotta love malleus and leona uniting in the common goal of hunting trey down for trying to game their whiny pettiness#(trey doesn't know what to do with someone he can't easily distract with cake)#also further confirmation that malleus WILL kill a small child and leona WILL point and laugh the whole time#also sebek's plans revolving around what he knows he's good at: screaming extremely loudly and hoisting nerds#and let us not forget what i consider to be the crowning jewel#which is jamil figuring out IMMEDIATELY where scully has taken his prisoners#only for everyone else to just. literally refuse to do anything about it.#jamil just standing there and going 'WE KNOW WHERE THEY ARE! WE CAN JUST! GO GET THEM!!!! WHYYY AREN'T WE GOING'#visibly losing his entire mind and it's beautiful#top 10 twst event moments honestly#also some delightful character consistency from jade being all#'actually my dicking around is a sign of my immense trust in your abilities to get things done :)'#'but also consider: there are currently two housewardens chasing a child'#'alternately angrily screaming poetry and begging them not to sue'#'and if you will pardon my city of flowers...there is no fucking way i'm missing that'#lock shock and barrel did not sign up for this. how did these idiots turn out to be somehow weirder than the three of them.#twisted wonderland must be a frightening place indeed
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Jorge Jimenez C2E2 2024 Commission!
#damian wayne#dick grayson#dynamic duo 2.0: what would you do without me?#beloved#idk if i can post it but i was asked with quick sketches if i wanted poses A or B for the hug#this was A and B was like a side hug pose to the camera LOL#anyway i'm inconsolable!! this art is both intensely motivating AND distracting how can i get anything done 😭#ok sorry i gotta scream but SO THANKFUL FOR HOW HAPPY JORGE DREW THEM!! I'M IN SHAMBLES DAMIAN'S BIG SMILE AND DICK'S TENDER ONE!!#THE FIRM HUG BETWEEN BOTH OF THEM WHERE DICK'S HAND GIVES THE CAPE FABRIC A BIT OF TENSION BC HE'S HOLDING DAMIAN CLOSE!!#AND DICK'S GENTLE HAND IN DAMIAN'S HAIR!! THEN DAMIAN FULL OUT CIRCLING HIS ARMS AROUND DICK!!#looks like Damian ran into this hug with Dick easily catching him as usual!#like. the arc from Damian's pose and solid line from Dick's. just such a solid silhouette idk!!#but yeah i'm on the floor in tears Jorge Jimenez THE ARTIST THAT YOU ARE
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On a very stupid note, can you imagine how embarrassing it is for Bruce Wayne, the most paranoid and secretive man on earth, that whenever there's drama in his family it inevitably reaches a significant portion of the superhero community?
And he can't even go after any one person, because Alfred would tell Dick (who tells Wally and Donna, especially if it was really stupid), Steph would tell Kara (who would tell Clark, who would tell Diana, who already knew via Donna), and Tim would tell Kon, Damian would tell Jon and Connor, Duke tells Jason about it, and because Wally told Barry Hal now knows (and other Lanterns), J'onn knew because Bruce was fuming and Clark was trying to figure out how to bring it up, Cass told Dinah and Barbara so now the entirety of the Arrowfam and Birds of Prey know too and so on.
#I just think that superheroes all know the unique pain of being in a team/family/partnership and are notorious gossips about their issues#So like everyone's gossip circulates but it's funniest when it happens to Bruce because he hates it and people find it funny to dissect the#blackbox that is his family#sorry this got away from me#i'm incapable of even figuring out how this roll call should happen#batfam#jla#batman#dc comics#bruce wayne#batfamily#dick grayson#jason todd#duke thomas#cassandra cain#barbara gordon#tim drake#damian wayne
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Weird dream.
#art#tmnt#tmnt original iteration#tmnt au#tmnt au leo#leo#teenage mutant ninja turtles#tmta#artists on tumblr#Hi I came up with an AU idea like. Last November#*Oops October actually#And I'm only just posting about it on main. I'm so good at this#Tbf I'm quite happy to just work on it slowly I've got a lot of plot points to iron out anyway#Also I'm primarily doing this for myself#So sorry if the stuff I post doesn't have much substance to it. This mostly only exists inside my brain#Only thing I will share is that I've been referring to the setting as Teenage Mutant Transgender Allegories in my head lmao#They're not explicitly trans. But they may as well be because I am projecting Hard onto this#The turtles are also. Kind of dicks to begin with. Less so Donnie but he has other problems to deal with#The whole thing is about growth and learning to change. So yea#And obviously family too. This is TMNT after all.#ANYWAY. I WILL STOP RAMBLING IN THE TAGS NOW.#Gonna go through my drafts and post the other stuff I made before this one so it's at least in the right order even if I am posting it late
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My toxic trait is that my favoritism for Dick Grayson has no bounds.
#he's just perfect#sorry but if we're talking about dc I'll find a way to bring him into the conversation#I'm so annoying about him#I could yap about his character for hours#there's no top 10 in my character list because dick occupies all the spots#dick grayson#nightwing#robin#dc#dc comics
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It's been two days since Dick’s arrival at the Wayne Manor. Currently Dick is holding a magazine with a picture of him and Bruce on its cover.
Dick: What's a DILF?
Bruce, chocks on his tea: What?!
Dick, shows the cover: Here, it says you're a DILF.
Bruce: Ah, it means...
Bruce: ...
Bruce: a Dad who Is Loving and Fantastic.
...
Months later.
Superman: Batman has told me a lot about you.
Dick as Robin, enthusiastic: He has?
Superman: Yes, your Dad loves you so much.
Robin: Holy hotdogs! He's a real DILF.
Superman:
Superman:
Superman: Oh yeah... He certainly is.
#i'm sorry...#(i'm really not)#he is a loving and fantastic dad#isn’t he?#then why is superman laughing?#Batman#bruce wayne#dc comics#batfamily#clark kent#superman#dick grayson#robin#nightwing#batfam#batfamily incorrect quotes#incorrect quotes#innocent quotes#dc#superbat
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Thinking long and hard about one of the guys being long and hard
You know who has literally the prettiest dick you've ever seen? Kyle "Gaz" Garrick. It's such a perfect length, bigger than average but also proportionally thick and with such soft skin it feels like you're running your tongue along velvet. Just an absolute a dream to get your mouth on. He keeps well trimmed too, the dark curls around the base cropped short and the balls nicely shaved. He likes seeing you duck down and lick at his sack, running your tongue over the stubbly hair before sucking his balls into your mouth. God, it's such a lovely feeling to have your mouth full of him, your tongue licking at the heavy balls, feeling the way they bunch and the skin pulls taught.
You look up at him through fluttering lashes and he's watching you with his irises swallowed by greedy pupils, his hand moving to rest on your head and pull you closer. You keep flicking your tongue out to lap at the skin you can't get in your mouth, shivering when you lick over the tight pucker of his ass. You have to pull back then, letting his balls pop from your mouth and pressing a final kiss to them before taking his perfect cock in your mouth again. So thick and warm in your hand, heavy when he slaps it against your tongue, slaps it against your cheek with his brows pinched together and a patronizing coo. Fuck he makes you want to stay down here for hours.
#x reader#cod x reader#kyle gaz garrick#kyle garrick#kyle gaz garrick x reader#kyle garrick x reader#gaz garrick#gaz garrick x reader#gaz x reader#gaz cod#gaz call of duty#gaz mw2#gaz mwii#sorry I'm talking about balls again#but my partner found out I'm into balls and now mr ghoul is like#he's only letting me suck on them and not his dick#horrible man I should never have told him
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Aaron shrugs, a little put off. It's not like he's an expert on ghosts, either. Oliver makes him angry, no surprise, but he also finds himself not really being able to navigate interacting with the spirit.
He hates it.
There's several point in time where he could have offered to help. But he doesn't. And he's glad he doesn't, because Oliver jumping away from the washing machine like it's going to explode is the funniest fucking thing he's seen all year.
"Oh, my god," Aaron wheezes, doubled over laughing. "That was pathetic."
Oliver looks over at Aaron like he just said something stupid. Which he did. In his eyes, at least.
“I’m a spirit, not a wizard.” He answers, sounding as if he’s genuinely confused by Aaron’s question. “I believe I’d be better dressed if I had the ability to create clothing at will.”
Looking back towards the controls, he throws all attempts at getting it correct out the window, instead turning any arrow and pressing any button he thought was correct. “And I wouldn’t be attempting this either—”
The sudden sound of the washer loudly beginning to rinse his shirt cuts him off, arm jolting away from the machine as if he accidentally touched something that he shouldn’t have. It doesn’t end up exploding as he had suspected, and he clears his throat when he realizes.
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Anyone who knew Jason before he died can only ever see him as baby. Sorry, I don't make the rules
Commission info ko-fi
#dc#batman#batfamily#batfam#jason todd#tim drake#bruce wayne#dick grayson#dc comics#dccomics#fanart#fan art#my art#comic#i'm sorry but boy was like 4'6 when he died#he was TINY
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Wes Weston: IRS.
Wes Weston is used to billionaires having sketchy finances. An offshore account here, and offshore account there-- A second home in a tax haven. He's never seen books like Wayne Enterprise's before.
"What even is BASE jumping? Why do they have a whole Applied Sciences department with only one guy working in it?" Wesley Weston had questions for Bruce Wayne. Questions he would get answered, if the billionaire was ever actually in his office. This was why he found himself rumbling up to the Wayne's well manicured, monoculture lawn in an only slightly questionable Uber.
"Wes Weston, IRS," he whispers, practicing under his breath before knocking on the door. "Wes Weston. IRS," he says more confidently, fumbling to get his badge out of his pocket. The door swung open, and he jumped. Goddamn rich people with their motion detecting doorbells.
"Dick Grayson, Blüdhaven P.D."
---
Wes Weston stood back from his cork board as rain pelted his hotel room window.
"Holy ghost. Bruce Wayne is the fucking Batman."
#dp x dc#dc#IRS agent Wes Weston#Wes Weston#dp#Dick Grayson#Bruce Wayne#Wayne Enterprises tax situation is dodgy#Bruce is not exempt from shady billionaire activity (or from paying taxes)#Cop Dick Grayson#I'm sorry :(#He doesn't have to be a cop by the end though!#And maybe they can fall in love?#That's up to you#Batman identity reveal#fanfic#prompt#Death and Taxes
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Not to be that bitch, but if you're out here still saying Colin never apologized for the whole "I would never court Penelope Featherington" i think you need to maybe actually rewatch episode 1.
He very much does, as soon as he can once hes aware he hurt her. He addresses literally everything Penelope said hurt her about it. He says what he said was cruel and hurtful, he says that hes not embarrassed by her, he tells her hes changed and regrets doing something that hurt her. Its the most genuine apology anyone in this show has given.
How any of you have walked away from that seeing it as a fake apology makes me genuinely question what you think an apology is. Is he meant to fall on his knees crying and begging her to move on? Thats not an apology. Is he supposed to go "I'm sorry I fucked up, you're actually soso cool and so much better than me and everyone else" because thats love bombing.
Colin did it right, he came to her privately, apologized, addressed how he hurt her, reassured her he's not embarrassed of her and views her as his best friend, and said that he'd changed. Thats the correct way to apologize, thats how adults communicate. Everything that happened after that was in response to Penelopes frustration at her inability to be someone viewed as desirable in their society, and Colins want to prove how much he cares about her.
If we want to talk about non-apologies in this show, Colin is far from the first character in that line.
#rainy talks#bridgerton#colin bridgerton#penelope featherington#polin#and also?? the way most o y'all eanted that apology to go was just colin humiliating himself#and fo what? a badly worded comment spoken while he was literally drinking?#yeah its a bit of a dick move to say but its not fall on the sword apologize for not being good enough bad#its “hey; i fucked up and I'm sorry; i won't do that again in its really not who I am”#Which is what he did#y'all wanted him to all but castrate himself publicly or lovebomb her until she was willing to forget it#thats not how this works.#if anyone in this relationship is giving non-apologies its Penelope but I'm not going into that rn
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"But that's my point!" Kedzie stretched out on the couch. "People train for all their lives and still end up dead right out of the gate. Or some twink from Eight surprises them in the night. Something always happens." He waved his hand dismissively in the air.
"It's not the training, it's not the weaponry. It's useful, sure. But it's the focus that gets people killed. Or the lack of it." He clapped his hands together, glee evident in his face. "That and failed diplomacy. You be too nice? Dead. You be too cruel? Dead. Gotta thread the line so, so carefully."
He finally looked over at Greer, a small smile on his face. "The something easier is people. I've been thinking. I'll bet I can get in good with that spunky kid from One. Maybe the woman from Four. Keep them on my good side, and then push 'em off a cliff or something when the time's right. Who do you think you can influence from your side of things?"
"You're good at most everythin'?" Greer asked dryly. Tributes from Ten were usually panicked about all the things they didn't know, or maybe they had one or two skills they tried to cling to with an iron grip. Kedzie's comment would've made her laugh, if it hadn't been so irritating. "S'all fuckin' hard," she snapped. "You ever lifted anythin' before?" She asked, baffled he thought he'd be able to start swinging a sword around without any training. "There are people who train with swords for over a decade before they hit the Arena and still get killed. You can't jus' pick up one'a the heaviest weapons in the trainin' center and expect it to be useful. Pick somethin' easier."
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The Batkids buy food for each other to circumvent having to apologize. Usually it works, with mutual nods or a question about whether [pickle/extra sauce/specificity] was included. And when it fails you best believe the sibling who messed up chases down the other to somehow force the food onto them and extract an apology. I'm talking city wide chases where Red Hood's bazooka-ing pancakes at a sibling (Condiment King tries to get in on it and gets smacked down for his troubles). Robin sends Red Robin crashing into a Red Robin joint because he's sorry. Or Spoiler being taken out of commission when Batgirl accidentally smacks her in the face with a takeout bag to apologize for knocking her out.
#This tradition started with Bruce#Who would make questionable toast and mildly flavoured water Alfred generously accepted to be tea for apologies#Then made Dick his favourite foods to smooth over screw ups#Which taught Dick to make Bruce's protein shakes to apologize#And then the deadly trio of Dick Alfie and Bruce would throw together a massive version of Jason's favourite breakfasts#To say sorry#And then it just got out of hand#And Clark remains bewildered after a spat when he keeps being plied with his favourite take out and the second he protests the#Food truck parks outside the Daily Planet for a month#batman#bruce wayne#personal#batfamily#My headcanons#I'm not doing the full roll call#Noooooooo
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I understand that literature nerd Jason Todd is kind of overblown in fanon compared to it's actual presence in canon (a few issues during his pre (and post?)crisis Robin tenure that highlight it) BUT consider that I think it's hilarious if the unhinged gun toting criminal has strong opinions on poetry
#ramblings of a lunatic#dc comics#Jason Todd#batfamily#it's just a fun quirk! it's a fun lil detail and I simply cannot slight ppl for enjoying and incorporating it into works#like obviously jason isn't the only one. I'm a big believer in the batfam having over lapping interests they refuse to bond over#i know dick canonically used the robin hood stories (which are pretty flowery in their language far as i can tell) as inspo for Robin#and i know babs was a librarian and even tho her area of nerddom is characterized as more computery she probably knows quite a lot-#-about literature as well#duke is a hobbyist writer i believe? i saw a fan mention that- which if so is great and I hope he's also a nerd#(i mean he is canonically. i remember him being a puzzle nerd in his introduction. but i mean specifically a lit nerd)#damian called Shakespeare boring but also took acting classes so i think he's more of a theatre kid.#Tim's a dropout and i don't think he's ever shown distinct interest in english lit and i can't remember for Steph?#I'm ngl my brain hyperfocused on musician Steph i forget some of her other interests I'm sorry (minus softball and gymnastics!)#and then Cass had her whole (non linear but it's whatevs) arc about literacy and learning to read#went from struggling to read in batgirl 00 to memorizing Shakespeare in 'tec and is now an avid read in batgirls!#she's shown reading edgar allen poe but we don't know if it's his short stories or his poems#point to all of the above being: i know Jason's not the only lit nerd in the batfam#but also i do need him to be writing poetry in his spare time and reading and reviewing it#jason at the next dead robins society meeting: evening folks today I'll be assigning all of us poems based on laika the space dog#damian and steph who have been kidnapped and brought to jasons warehouse to hangout: LET US GO BITCH#speaking of^ random poem i think jason would like: space dog by alan shapiro#wake up one morning in an unfamiliar more mature body with a profound sense of abandonment. the last four lines. mmm tasty
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