#I'm not that used to writing anything lemon related

[starry-eyesanddaydreams]

NSFW Alphabet - Sheriff of Nottingham

Alright. Taking the plunge. First instalment of Rickman's NSFW Alphabet. Starting with George of Nottingham (who was ridiculously easy to write for, the sexy bastard) Enjoy! These are gonna be reader insert too.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

He never really cared before, when he was done he was done. But you brought out the softest hidden in that stony heart of his and he wants to make sure you’re properly cared for. He’ll bath with you and sooth any aches you have. Back in bed, he’ll wrap you both in soft warm furs and blankets and hold you against his chest, skin to skin, as you fall asleep.

B = Body part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

For himself, he likes his profile. The most amount of care he spends on personal grooming is keeping his beard trimmed nicely. For you, he's a classic tits and ass man. He loves how soft you feel to hold and touch.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

With this dirty bastard? Pretty much anything goes. He'll cum in you, on you, he's filthy.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He daydreams about having sex with you in front of the church alter. He’s got to do something to entertain his mind while attending a church he doesn’t believe to keep up appearances for the villagers. And the thought of stripping you both naked and taking you on all fours in their precious church, defiling their holy place with your pagan lust, is such a delicious daydream.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Very. He likes sex and has had pick of women for a long time. Although these days the only one he wants is you.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Cowgirl. He likes to be able to watch and touch you.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He can be playful and he loves to tease.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

It's not something he bothers to much about, he has more important things to focus on.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

He’s not a very romantic person, but you are precious to him. You’re the only sweetness in his life and he makes sure you know it. No matter how rough the sex is, he’ll make you feel loved. Whispered and grunted words of love in your ear while he thrusts inside you. A kiss pressed to your palm as he pins your hands to the bed.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He doesn't really have a need to. He'd much rather find you for a quicky if he's in the mood.

K = Kink

Manhandling. He’s bigger and stronger than you and he loves to use that. Carrying you to your shared chambers over his shoulder, pinning you to the wall with your legs around his waist, ripping your clothes off. And along with that he also likes a bit of dub-con. Persuit and conquest. Of course, you both know you’re a very willing participant and it turns you on as much as it does him.

L = Location (favourite places to do the do)

Your chambers, usually. In bed or in front of the fireplace. But when the mood strikes, you could end up in an alcove in the castle or up against a tree in the forest.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

When you’re in public together, like going to church with him, and you look so proper and ladylike, but he knows that underneath your neat, modest clothes is a body that he’s explored and debauched in every conceivable way and how your sweet, demure voice can scream and curse as he overwhelms you with pleasure.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Nothing that would cause you permanent damage or actual pain. Spanks and love bites are one thing, but he won’t do anything that would make you bleed, scar or put you in real pain. You’re his to protect and keep safe.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Prefers to receive. But still enjoys tasting you and making you squirm and scream.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Depends on the mood. If he's stressed or particularly horny, he's fast and rough. Or in a more playful or loving mood, he can really take his time.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He prefers to take his time and properly enjoy it, but sometimes he just needs you now, either because he’s horny or frustrated and needs to take the edge off.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

As horny as he is, of course he's up to experimenting. Only thing he's not into is anything voyeuristic. Not that he cares about himself, but he won't have anyone else seeing you like that.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

A couple is usually enough, but he can go four or so if he wants.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He has no need for toys. His hands, mouth and dick are well up to the task.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

When has way too much fun winding you up and making you beg.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Not overly loud, but he grunts and groans and definitely makes you know how much pleasure he's feeling.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He's actually got a very needy, soft heart under all that bluster. He hid it at first, but you eventually worked him out. When he opens up enough to allow it, he loves being sweetly loved and cared for by you.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

That codpiece hides nothing. Big and thick and can stretch you out perfectly.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

High. His solution to everything is sex. Whether he's happy, angry, stressed, the answer is sex.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He falls asleep fairly quickly after sex, you both do, as you’ve well and truly worn each other out.

[tellmegoodbye]

Hello lovely people, and welcome back to my monthly rec lists. You know the drill by now!

Sorry it took me a few extra days to put this together, but I'm so excited to share some of my favorite fics from this month! There were also a few fics I wanted to read and didn't get the chance to, so hopefully you'll see those in the April list.

---

Oneshots

Cataclysm - @heartstringsduet

So much to say about this one! Michelle has truly created a masterpiece here. If you're thinking it's just another pwp, it's so much more than that. This is a fic about love, about how TK and Carlos love each other in the most vulnerable ways. It's so poetic in the way it describes every emotion and sensation, it takes great care with these characters, and it so beautifully written that it will probably make you cry. I don't think I've read a fic that describes love in its rawest forms better than this one. So yeah, it's not just sex. It's a love letter. And it's a gorgeous fic.

Telling You Anyway - @goodways

This fic requires tissues. Anything surrounding the Soulmates Scene™ is already going to make me an emotional wreck, so when you add Shannon's incredible writing on top of that I never stood a chance! The writing here is absolutely beautiful, and this 4x16 coda perfectly balances emotion and TK and Carlos being so in love that it hurts. The ending was especially heartwrenching...but the tears are worth the read because this fic will make you feel just as overwhelmed as the original soulmates scene did.

When You're Here, You're Family - @lemonlyman-dotcom

I love the beautiful chaos of this found family so much! I thought this fic was so sweet and funny. It involves sentimental wedding gifts, as well as a bit of a gift card mishap. I think it is now an official fandom HC that Marjan would love a restaurant enough that all of her friends unknowingly give her the same gift card. Also, it took me an embarrassingly long time to realize that the title is the Olive Garden slogan. I was just watching tv today and an ad came on for Olive Garden, and I went "wait, that's Lemon's fic!"

In The Garden Of Evil, Honey - @mikibwrites

Y'all.....this fic was so good! The universe is so carefully and thoughtfully crafted for the length of this fic, and I was instantly pulled in. I love the dynamic of TK and Carlos being hunters and working together while also protecting each other. It's so fun, and also intense too. The end had me holding my breath! No spoilers, but this fic is definitely worth a read even if you're like me and not typically into these type of AUs.

Meetings And Partings - @paperstorm

God, this fic is incredible. It might be a tough read, but it's absolutely worth it. It's bittersweet, dealing both with the loss of Owen, and with the strength of the love that still exists between everyone else even after so much time has passed. He brought them all together and now they get to come together and celebrate that, and him. It's sad at times, but also beautiful! I also love getting to explore all of the possibilities regarding what all of their futures might look like, and I definitely enjoyed Andie's take on that here.

Everything You Pray For - @theghostofashton

I always love fics that focus more on the beautiful friendships in this show. Carlos and Marjan can relate to each other in so many ways, and while the show itself focused more on the overall group dynamics, I love when fics expand on that and touch on the ways individual characters can see and understand each other. I just think it's so wonderful that we still have so much more to explore with all of the potential this show left us with, and this fic does an excellent job at exploring the dynamic between Marjan and Carlos when it comes to their upbringings and relationships with their parents.

Snowed In - @chicgeekgirl89

Some good ole sick fic in beautiful, snowy Colorado, with some absolutely precious Jonah moments and lovely hurt/comfort all around! Despite the fact that Carlos is sick in this one, this fic feels like a warm hug on a cold winter's evening. I love how TK doesn’t do anything halfway, especially when it comes to worrying and taking care of his husband! I also love how Jonah is written here. He's a kid who's curious and perceptive, and he clearly takes after both TK and Carlos in many ways. This is a wonderful read if you're looking for some TK, Carlos and Jonah vibes as well as TK and Carlos getting their alone time in, even in less than ideal circumstances.

The One Where The Dogist Meets Buttercup - @firstprince-history-huh

This fic is so fun! Diti takes such a cool concept and turns it into something beautiful here with the idea of Owen and Buttercup meeting a stranger and Owen telling them their story. It's so sweet, and I love to think about all of the adventures Owen and Buttercup would be getting up to back up in New York.

Absolutely Wrecks People - @heartstringsduet

This was more than a fic to me. Michelle has gifted us with magic once again, and while reading this, I thought a lot about my own experiences with depression and felt a connection to TK as a character that I never had before now. And isn't that the beauty of fic? I feel more than just sad for the angst surrounding TK in this fic, I feel seen. I feel relief in having the privilege to read such a gorgeously written fic that details some of the more grueling aspects of our mental health in ways that I'm sure many of us can relate to. It's certainly a rough one, and not one for everyone, but this fic is something that is so raw, and so reflective, that it's worth sitting down and letting that wave of emotions crash over you.

Holding On To Your Final Breath - @morganaspendragonss

The angst in this one is not for the faint of heart! It's so achingly beautiful to think about a universe where TK and Carlos were together during push, and maybe it was necessary for them to be apart in order for TK to fight his way back. In this fic, the result is devestating, so I definitely warn you that this fic will give you a damn good cry if that's what you're looking for.

Chaptered Fics

Wild Pitch - @ironheartwriter

I'm loving this fic so far! The enemies to lovers dynamic is a classic, but Lana does such a good job at making that tension so tangible between TK and Carlos. You can practically feel the anger and (mostly sexual) frustration in every interaction! I also love this universe with them being roomates, and I love the teasing in TK and Mateo's friendship, too. It's still early on, but I can't wait to read more of this story!

This fic is currently ongoing.

I'm Way Too Good At Bad Decisions - @emsprovisions

This fic sucked me in right from the start! It has the charm and intrigue of an alternative meeting AU while also maintaining the awkward (and hot) hookups that we all know and love with Tarlos. They don't know what they're doing, but they know they can't stay away from each other. They're confused and down bad all at once and that makes me even more excited to see where this fic goes from here! I also love this art by @heartstringsduet because I am obsessed with their spring break atttire!

This fic is currently ongoing.

The Sounds Of Summer - @everlastingday

I absolutely adored this AU idea from the first moment Bee mentioned it, and now after having read the first chapter, I'm even more excited about this fic! I love the bickering between TK and Carlos, and y'all know the one thing I love more than a good, classic enemies to lovers fic is a music AU! The world of orchestra is so fascinating to me, and now even more so! I already feel like I've been sucked into this world, and now I want to learn even more about the ins and outs of orchestra, and I'm definitely looking forward to seeing where this story goes!

This fic is currently ongoing.

Living On A Fault Line - @strandnreyes

If you're craving some solid angst, I definitely recommend checking this fic out! It's a very rough and realistic glance at how a serious injury would affect Carlos' mental health, as well as his relationship with TK. It also touches on the fear brought on by not knowing exactly when or how the healing process will go. Reading this fic actually reminds me a lot of another fic Jen wrote, Come What May, I'll Still Stay, which is another fic that does such a good job at showing the darker side of leaning too heavily on the job and the toll that takes on TK and Carlos.

This fic is currently ongoing.

The Lone Ranger - @rangersoup

Returning from the February rec list: This just keeps getting better! I am deeply intrenched in this mystery of who is going after Carlos, and it's also unique in that we get to explore all of this from Sam's perspective. It's equal parts angsty and mysterious, and the writing is so good! I feel even more immersed in this universe with every chapter. I can't wait to see where this one goes!

This fic is currently ongoing.

The Widow's Bite - @henrygrass

Returning from the February rec list: This fic is absolutely brilliant. There's really no better word to use for it. The writing is stunning, especially during certain scenes that were so immersive and overwhelming, and so beautifully captured that I had to stop reading to catch my breath at times. This is such a fantastic balance of angst, whump, mystery, and joy. It explores new relationships, old cases, and everything that comes with adjusting to a new family in more ways than one, all in less than ideal circumstances. I don't want to reveal too many spoilers here, so all I will say is that if you want to have your breath stolen away the same way I did, then you need to read this fic.

This fic is now complete.

You're Still The One - @strandnreyes

Returning from the February rec list: I loved this fic! It's such a lovely rendition of a Sweet Home Alabama style AU, with a story that Jen made into her own. That made for a lot of lovely surprises, even though this movie is a classic favorite of mine. If you love exes to lovers, small town AUs, and some good old-fashioned oblivious boys realizing they're still in love, run don't walk and go read this fic!

This fic is now complete.

Somewhere In A Song - @paperstorm

Returning from the February rec list: By now I think everyone knows how much I am obsessed with this AU, but it deserves repeating! Sure, I'm a sucker for any music AUs, but this fic pulled me into such a fascinating world with carefully chosen lyrics, emotional moments both on and off statge, and everything even down to the styles of music and the interactions with the crowd was an absolute blast for me to analyze after every chapter. Andie clearly put a lot of love into this fic, and it shows!

This fic is now complete.

[mothstvrnz]

Random HC cuz' I'm bored

Take some silly lil' headcannones I'm writing while I take a break from writing "WHATS UP DANGER?"

Mina Ashido:

Huge DTI player, like, all day everyday. Vip? Check. Custom Makeup? Check. Faster walking? Check. Double money? Check. She has it all, including every code known to man

If she weren't a hero, she would've gone into something cosmetology related. Nails, hair, makeup, lashes, that kind of thing.

As a little kid, she had a birthday party where someone came as a party princess for her 4th or 5th birthday before her quirk came in. The princess was hugging the kids goodbye, and Mina was SUPER upset that her favorite princess had to go. She held onto the poor girl who was trying to get to another birthday party, and in that moment, Mina's quirk manifested, melting the sparkly pink princess dress, making Mina cry even harder.

"Oh no, I ruined your dress, I'm sorry princess!" "Oh, hon', it's okay- accidents happen." *cries even harder*

Denki Kaminari

Had a kick ass Pokémon card collection from elementary to middle school, and keeps it in his dorm but is afraid to show people because of rude ppl in middle school telling him Pokémon cards were dumb, including a girl he had liked

I can see him liking lemon water but fully denying it when people ask him

I can see his parents getting divorced when he was pretty young, and there was one time where his mom got a boyfriend he did NOT like at all, ended up electrocuting him multiple times before they ended up breaking things off

"Denks, hon', why don't you like him?" "He isn't good enough for you, mommy!" "Why do you say that?" "He doesn't like dinosaurs, who doesn't like dinosaurs?!"

Momo Yaoyorozu:

She LOVES a giant, juicy burger with everything; lettuce, tomatoes, onions, BACON, cheese, everything that belongs on a burger is there.

LOVE LOVE LOVES smutty romance books but won't tell a soul because people think it's weird/gross

At one point at UA, she had a huge thing where she was insecure about her stretch marks REALLY badly, but all the girls in 1A reminded her how beautiful she was and how her body didn't define her, ESPECIALLY YOUR GIRL (Y/N)

"God, I hate my stretch marks." "Girl, what the heck?! Why?" "I don't know... Just makes me feel... fat I guess." "If I ever hear you call yourself fat again I swear on All Might himself that I will slap you. Think of them like tiger stripes! Tigers are wickedly cool, strong, beautiful!"

Katsuki Bakugo:

Afraid for anyone to find out he needs hearing aids from his explosions

Intense skin care routine, has a headband and everything

He has reading glasses, and reads all the time in the comfort of his dorm. Hate me, but I can totally see him reading historical fiction books and wondering how people managed to do anything without quirks.

"Can you believe what it would be like without quirks?" "Not really, why?" "I'm reading this book-" "You read?!" "Shut the hell up! The book I'm reading talked about people in ancient Japan using bows and arrows to fight. Isn't that so weird to think about?" "Bakugo, what on Earth are you saying?" "God, you're too stupid to understand it. Forget it."

Tsuyu Asui:

Loves finger painting and will never stop

Multiple times as a teen, she would sneak out, not to do anything bad, no. She would sneak out to go to the ponds and chill with the frogs because they're most active at night

In elementary, she had this really mean kid that bullied her because of her quirk. This kid would make the most out of hand comments and really tried her hardest to annoy Tsu, but she just wouldn't budge. Until one day, she made a comment about her tongue, which was the final straw for her.

"Eww, why is your tongue so long?!" "Can you stop, please?" "Why would I do that? Your quirk is so- Ack! Ew, ew, ew, get it off me!" "I told you to stop." "Okay, okay! I'll stop, just get the stupid frog off of me!"

[chaos-and-sparkles]

In Which I Ramble About Pavitr's Character Design and the Indian Cultural Stuff Related to It

DISCLAIMER: I'm an Indian, and these are all my thoughts and analyses, but I'm also just one person and by no means am I speaking for everyone. I am not all knowing, and I am not immune to being wrong sometimes. These points are all my own thoughts and stuff that I know through my lived cultural experiences and some history and book knowledge, but I've not particularly researched any of these. I'm just out here giving my take from what I know. This is mostly just going to be me rambling, okay? Okay. Let's go!

Anyway okay so I just wanna go from the top down:

No. 1:

First of all his hair

His fucking hair

This is one aspect that i k n o w I'm overthinking and probably wasn't as significantly thought out in the design but it just Spoke to me and by all accounts I'm not the only one

But I'm so glad we have him with his thick gorgeous fricking hair, especially them being like curly/wavy and slightly long instead of straight and cropped or whatever

Like. Indians usually have very thick and luscious hair, not everyone ofc but generally it's a thing, and it's considered a point of pride to have long dark thick hair.

And the thing is for the longest time the beauty standard in India was to have very straight and shiny hair, all the actresses and heroes were doing it, even though that's literally not the realistic case for a lot lot LOT of Indians. There's a pretty big variety of hair texture in India; some of it is regionally concentrated too, eg. in South India you get a lot of frizzy, tightly coiled hair that's rough textured, whereas curly hair is usually silkier and looser curled as you go Northwards,, Bengalis tend to have very wavy thick hair,, etc. By no means a rule or anything, it's just a thing that there's a lot of curl variety and a lot of it was for the longest time considered ugly and unkempt (there are some classist/regionalist elements to this stereotype also unsurprisingly) still is by some people,,, bc the standard was Shiny Straight Hair. It's a standard that's slowly shifting. It's currently leaning more on the wavy and voluminous side. But it's def a thing still.

All that to say, it makes me so so happy to see Pav with his curly-ish lush hair that he wears with such pride and style,, that are a symbol of his own pride and self care too!!!

Also the line about "coconut oil, prayers and good genetics" - I LOVE THAT REFERENCE AHAHABSSK, using coconut oil for the hair is a very common thing here, it's so so good for the hair and the scalp alike and it's relaxing to massage it in too.

I've seen people try to write Pavitr in fics as "quickly brushing some coconut oil through his hair" as part of his morning routine and. Um. That's not how it's done askaskjas, I don't mean to be rude to the writers at all, everyone does the best with what they know and no one knows everything, but also practically speaking that would be greasy and awful.

There are multiple ways to apply coconut oil, ofc. Coconut oil is often massaged into the scalp and rubbed into the hair like an hour before washing, sometimes with lemon juice mixed in, and then washed off when bathing. Some people, especially those with drier and finer hair, apply it as a regular after-hair-wash thing, too, but even so it needs to be rubbed in.

A really beloved thing we have is coconut oil champis, too! This is basically when you sit down cross legged in front of youe mother/grandmother, and she massages the coconut oil into your scalp and hair in a way that literally cures all tension and headaches and leaves your head reeling and is so so good for hair and stress and everything. It's a family bonding thing more than just a hair routine. It's not always done by the mom/grandmother ofc, it's just how most of us first experience it, and they have a technique that none of us can ever quite replicate to the same effect later. As we grow up, we often do it for ourselves and for others. It's a weekly or monthly or even just occasional thing depending on who you ask. But yeah that reference was great I love it dearly!

Also about the hair length

So in the current modern "civilized" standard (Indian schools and society in general tend to do a lot of shit trying to assimilate us into western culture and stamp out our own,, for example all my life I've been in schools where speaking Hindi and Telugu and stuff in class or in the hallways was Wrong and Forbidden and We Must Speak Only In English Bc We Are Educated And Cultured. This is so fucking hypocritical bc they would also have Hindi and Telugu classes and then criticize us for not getting it right or whatever), boys are meant to have short hair. Teachers literally single boys out in class for leaving their hair longer, not the exact length they set as the limit. This was my entire school experience; thankfully it doesn't seem to be the case in college, but that may just be bc I'm in an artsy college. In the workplace it's less stringent but it's still a thing.

HOWEVER, historically and culturally, long hair was considered good and even Important for both men and women. There's huge regional variations in this ofc; Maratha peshwas and higher classes and stuff for example wore a "pilaka" (idk what else it's called), which is the head shaven clean except a tuft in the middle that's sometimes braided. Brahmins still do it too.

But my point being, long hair was considered good for the most part, at most it would be worn in a bun for fighting and working,,, braids are a pretty big deal too. Having to cut your hair short=a symbol of dishonour and/or exile, or reserved for menial workers and so called "low classes".

(This is not stuff you even get explicitly told btw. This is stuff I've mostly inferred and studied from history and mythology and stuff , so there's no guarantee I'm 100% right)

Also, in Sikkhism (I'm not Sikh myself so correct me if I'm wrong, this is just what I know) having long hair is super fucking important for men. The hair is wrapped up in the turban, and the turban is a symbol of honour and pride and literally considered life. The long hair is considered sacred.

Removing the turban is basically a symbol of literally losing your honour pride and sense of self,, not just in Sikkhism, just generally at this point. Cutting your hair? Insult on injury.

Pavitr doesn't have particularly long hair ofc

But having grown up with such rigidly enforced things abt boys having very short cropped hair, it makes me so happy to see an Indian character who defies that.

Also!! Quick tangent about braids and their significance,, they're considered very beautiful and another symbol of pride, intricate buns and what not too! Just wanna drop this to give you an idea of what i mean:

In the Hindu myth of the Mahabharata, Draupadi, the wife of the Pandavas (she's a very interesting and important and beloved character, regionally also considered a goddess, she was a princess born of fire married to five princes and the vengeance for her honour literally fuelled the war for righteousness etc etc) vows never to braid her hair again until she has washed it in the blood of Dushasana, a man who forcefully tried to disrobe her in court (it's a whole myth of its own). At the apex of the war, Bheem, her husband, brings her his blood. She washes her hair in it and then for the first time in thirteen years, she braids it.

Braids are not as significant now but it was basically a Pretty Big Deal and I just wanted to talk abt it.

In Hinduism too the gods are portrayed with long hair, it's a Thing.

No. 2:

Okay so moving more downwards,, I have a bunch of Thoughts abt Pavs mask design!

Okay so obv we have the spiderweb-pattern that's a given.

But. The interesting parts are these:

The bindi-like design on his forehead.

Bc my point is

Sure that looks like a bindi. And that's beautiful in itself but I HAVE ANOTHER TAKE

Bindis are traditionally worn by women as a symbol of beauty, prosperity, and again, pride. But while nice, that's not quite a symbolism that fits imo

You know what else is ver similar where my mind immediately goes? A tilak.

The shape is kind of off for a tilak actually, a tilak is more of a U or a V with a dot or a flame-like stroke in the middle. So in that case it looks more like a bindi

But i really like thinking that it's inspired by a tilak too, bc

While a bindi is a decorative mark stuck or painted on a woman's forehead as a symbol of beauty and prosperity

A tilak is basically a mark that's finger-painted on the forehead of , usually a man but there's a softer smaller version for women too and ofc there are women warriors who got tilaks, for auspicious and blessing reasons. So in a Puja or ceremony, a tilak is put as a blessing and an auspicious thing, also meant to impart strength. The head of the household usually gets the most striking or biggest one.

Pandits usually wear tilaks for blessing purposes too, although their design is different and more elaborate than the ones given to others

Gods and goddesses had their own tilaks, some of them very distinctive like Shiva's

The part that applies to Pav is the warrior tilak

Basically before a king or warrior went to battle, it was customary to do a small sending off ritual and for the wife or mother to put the tilak for them and say "Vijay bhava" (may you be victorious)

It's still done for big undertakings and challenges like exams and new jobs and stuff.

It's basically for strength, bravery and victory

The main difference in a bindi and tilak is the intent:

Bindi is for beauty

Tilak is for valour

Which. For a HERO. Just. Chef's kiss.

2. the markings around his eyes!!

I'm sure this has been said before, but it's very very reminiscent of kathakali makeup.

Regionally there's a lot of eye makeup stuff also btw. There are some absolutely beautiful tribal designs and regional designs with a lot of colours but I cant remember specifics rn

Also!! The very distinctive black lines around Pav's eyes?? I love them sm bc they feel so so based in kohl and kajal. Another huge beauty and often pride related thing.

There's even a whole thing where a mother or older sister will often rub a bit of her kohl off on her fingertip and press it behind their loved one's ear so that "buri nazar na lage" (no one's bad gaze catches you). It's called a kaala teeka

The idea being that you're so beautiful and/or cute and bright and lovable and nothing should jinx that and nothing bad should happen to you. It's very rare now and I've never experienced it myself but it's so so precious <33

3. the white markings on his cheeks!

I've seen that explanation of how it's reminiscent of Ganesha, the elephant headed god who is kind of a symbol of new beginnings, intelligence, prosperity, and a ton of stuff I don't even know how to explain honestly, but he's very cool and beloved and has a lot of Good Vibes™ and i love him basically.

I personally am reminded more of kathakali makeup again!! But that explanation is very cool too and i like it!! I don't know if I agree bc i think it m i g h t be a blasphemy to have that imagery on your face, afaik no one here does it for any reasons and we have literal festivals and pujas dedicated to Ganesha

But then again I am a human with limited knowledge and i don't know everything

I personally think the tusk like designs are very cool. However, I also think it would be a bit of a No No for religious reasons. I also think it reminds me more of classical dance face makeup and stuff.

I also think if they meant to make it a Ganesha reference, then he should only have a tusk on one side, bc there's a huge deal about Ganesha being "ekdanta" (transl: one toothed) bc he has a well known myth of breaking off one of his tusks to write a mythologically and culturally significant epic.

There are also a lot of actual cultural face painting things in India that are way cooler than the Ganesha thing in my opinion. So while that theory is cool, I don't personally agree with it. I could be wrong, again, idk what the design intent was exactly.

No. 3:

Next thing: this is a very very small thing and i only have a sentence on it, but i really appreciate Pav's neckline in his suit.

The neckline here? That's the kind of cut that's most typical of kurtas. Especially more ceremonial, kingly, wedding sherwani, or generally festive attire; a regular kurti might have a v-neck or something, but this curved collar? Very Indian and classy in a way I can't fully explain.

No. 4:

This next thing I'm going to go completely ballistic about, everyone hold on to your seats!!!

THE FUCKING MOTIF ON HIS UPPER ARMS. IT'S EVEN ON THE MEHENDI-ISH PATTERN ON HIS WRISTS AND HANDS. THE SPIDER SHAPE TOO. I AM NOT NORMAL OKAY

LISTEN.

LISTEN TO ME

TBIS IS CONFIRMATION THAT KRISHNA PAVITR IS CANON

HE IS SO SO KRISHNA CODED

Idc if I'm delusional, i DARE you to look at that blue design and tell me it doesn't look like a peacock feather

THE SHAPE OF HIS FUCKING SPIDER IS OH SO SUBTLY CURVED TO BE PEACOCK FEATHER SHAPED TOO

There is no human way for me to be normal about this i need a minute

Okay for context:

Krishna is a very important and beloved god in Hinduism. I cannot overstate the love I have for him, even being mostly non religious myself.

There is SO MUCH about him he is such a big deal and thanks to him being made a character in popular Indian cartoons and so many animated and live action movies being made about him, he is literally woven in the fabric of our collective consciousness and love for our culture

He's a mischevious and fun and chaotic and lowkey antiestablishment kid deity. He contains the literal universe. He has a deep abiding love for his people and his family and loved ones and the world he serves. He is a dancer, flute player, sweetheart, lover of life. He has a thousand wives, yet one Radha who he never married but is his literal immortalized soulmate. He guides heroes to duty. He is full of wisdom but also silly hijinks. He is so so beloved.

The peacock feather is his symbol! You could see the peacock feather anywhere and it's immediately OH KRISHNA! He wears a peacock feather, famously. In all his iterations, from childhood to adulthood. Peacock feather is his emblem.

Krishna is depicted through the peacock feather. It's become a very common motif in arts like mehendi and various textile arts to have peacock feather and peacock patterns; I'm sure that existed before Krishna too in several cultural circles but he is definitely a huge part of it since. There is a chikankari motif that is very recognisable that's reminiscent of peacock feather but I'm mostly unsourced on that, going off my own interpretation

But there's a definite link between peacock feather=Krishna=inextricable part of culture and art.

At least in North India. He's less of a big deal the further south you go. Still very widespread and overall loved tho.

So anyway seeing that peacock feather type motif on Pav?? Mixed with his Spiderman identity??? Is so amazing to me.

Krishna coded Pavitr real ✨

(Also yeah people have already pointed out that Pav's hand designs are based on mehendi so I don't need to go into that askjasjkas)

No. 5:

Also. Huge fan of his arm cuffs. It's just another Indian warrior thing; often in ye olde times and in mythology, the cuff would be a lot simpler, often just a thread with an amulet to grant you protection. But it steadily became fancier, and now it can be decorative or a valour thing or both

Very often just decorative now actually. Often seen in weddings and ceremonies too

No. 6:

Okay about his bangles now:

I absolutely LOVE THEM I love them so much I am so obsessed with them actually!!

So. First of all

I remember there being a confusion in like earlier fics especially on whether they were bracelets or damrus or bangles or what

And i have Thoughts

So first of all

They are not damrus/damarus.

Damarus are a musical instrument made of wood and with two beaded ropes to beat on the small drum-like ends. They're also symbols of lord Shiva who uses a damaru.

They are very different from what Pav wears and i remember my fucking whiplash when earlier fics called his bangles damarus. I think i choked on my maggi.

I don't mean to be rude to the writers ofc, they were doing the best with what they knew. But it's just very jarring to me to hear that

I think an explanation I heard was that Pav's web shooter design was inspired by damarus? Which yeah I get that and I actually wanna talk about it bc I very much see it. But they are very much NOT damarus themselves

So

First of all i personally have never seen nor heard of the kind of bangles Pav wears which appear to have a strip of cloth in the middle? While being gold cuffs on both ends? Which is new and interesting actually and opens up aspects abt his character that i find really interesting

Bc first of all: that implies he made them himself from stuff he already had inspired by things he saw. It seems, at least to me, like he used bangles/kadas he had to make the shooters he uses, which are designed the way they are for easier slinging and his cool tricks with them which would be harder if they were solid gold, and also the shape when he does the cool yoyo-y trick and hits The Spot with it and everything is very damaru shape. Which is also pretty cool if it's meant as a reference to Shiva and his damaru (he's a very fierce god with the damaru) or a reference to the street performers who use it nowadays.

Either way - and also additionally the fact that PAV LITERALLY DOUBLED HIS BANGLES AS WEB SHOOTERS WHICH IS SO CREATIVE AND SMART - and developed his own whole signature skillset with it?? And made his own bangle/shooters as I said before????

My boy is PEAK jugaadu

He is the embodiment of jugaad

Never has anything been so true to the Indian spirit than jugaad

Okay so for context, the jugaad that I keep talking about:

It basically means makeshifting and/or inventing stuff you need from the limited stuff you have. That's a very simple way of explaining it. Just imagine that, but up the silliness level x100.

For example, a guy jugaaded a showerhead by poking holes in a sprite bottle and putting a hose in it and routing it to the tap.

Jugaad can be both very smart, and very funny and silly

And it usually involves combining useless stuff/trash/just stuff you had lying around to make smth that you didn't wanna waste money buying, and often ends up having more functions than the stuff it was meant to replace. This but it's also very crackheaded. Like idk how to explain. It's basically makeshifting, but it's just developed into such an Indian Spirit Thing™ that we have a word for it

So i love that Pavitr's bangles do all of that. He is a true Indian boy to his core!

No. 7:

Okay I have thoughts on his dhoti too!

So.

Blue.

I know why they used blue for his dhoti, what with the spiderman colours, the need to complement his bright red with smth softer, and everything. I get it and i love it so so much. What I'm about to say next is not a complaint against this at all, it's very good design imo

But.

Everytime I look at him in his fucking blue dhoti

I just remember all the times my grandmother has apprehended me and made me go and change for trying to wear blue or black at a Puja

Bc they're apparently unholy colours ;_;

Basically yellow, saffron, red are the appropriate holy colours. Now that i think about it, I've never seen a god or mythological king depicted in a blue dhoti or generally blue clothing either - farthest they go from the three i described is pink or green

I never really thought about it until my Nani pointed it out. I'm still not sure if anyone except her even knew or cared about it.

But that is the memory that bonks me on the head every time i Perceive the blue dhoti

Bro upgraded from funeral colour (white, which is his dhoti in the comics and absolutely infuriates me on a visceral level) to unholy colour askaskjjska it's so funny to me

Purple was still a luxurious colour, but generally warmer and/or lighter colours are The Done Thing. It's an old notion and the cultural connotations are now very diluted by Western influence and also none of us Caring about a lot of it anymore (not necessarily a good or bad thing particularly)

Indigo also has. Loaded connotations.

Because Britain did a Colonialism and a lot of Indians suffered for it. It's a whole history lesson.

I would rather not get into the whole details but basically Indigo (the plant from which the dye was made) was a valuable commodity and Britishers essentially forced farmers to grow only that, ignoring their need to grow food or sustenance or care for the land in general, especially in the Bihar-UP regions. There were eventually a lot of revolts where many people, esp farmers, died.

Basically a double whammy of starvation and death as a direct result of colonialism. It was a major part, historically, that sparked rage for the freedom movement

If you wanna learn more abt it you can search up Champaran farmer revolts!

Also about the drape of Pav's dhoti:

I've seen a couple of memes and reels abt how Pav, in an emergency, suiting up for Spiderman duty, would be taking an hour to drape the dhoti and stuff

And those are hilarious and i love them

But also

That's literally not even a proper dhoti -

So the thing pav wears is basically more of dhoti-pants with a cummerbund.

So okay I need to explain this better hold on

A dhoti is basically a sheet of fabric that is draped around the waist and down. The elaborateness of the cloth can vary vastly from intricately patterned silk and brocade, to plain white cotton with a thin gold border optional

The drape of the dhoti varies even more depending on region, occasion, occupation, and status. You can have everything from the casual simple towel like drape and tuck that some men wear to relax on a daily basis, to an intricate thing with many folds and pleats and tucks and the middle part that hangs (I forget the name for that) that would actually legitimately take hours and is often adorned with jewellery . To a thing that's flexible to move in and also looks very pretty and is genderneutral some dance forms call for.

Basically. The drape varies vastly. And it's all one cloth, maybe a second one for a separate cummerbund sometimes, I'm not that well versed abt dhotis tbh.

But the thing Pav wears?? It doesn't seem to me to be folded the way I've ever seen any dhoti

The way it's folded and shaped is not how those style of dhotis work. There would be a lot more pleats and folds, for one. But it's not shaped the way to match the less-folded dhotis either.

Now, I'm no dhoti expert, but that leads me to believe that's not a full on dhoti. What it's more likely to be is dhoti-pants

Dhoti pants are this fusion thing. It's in the name. I haven't seen it much but I know/think/am pretty sure its a thing, bc most Indian guys now don't know how to drape a dhoti either and it's a good solution. Worn like a pant, looks like a dhoti. Simple. A cummerbund for the middle drape, and you're set!

Also side note: the fold with the distinct two legs and the middle drape that Pav has? Is the most commonly depicted warrior and king drape,, at least in North and Middle India, I'm not as well versed about the South but I think it's the case there too. The gods are depicted in that drape too

I have fewer comments on his leg design, I like that it's reminiscent of mehendi even on his feet bc yeah that's also done on the feet, although rarer now and also a bridal thing

No. 7:

He has gold cuffs on his ankles that I really like!

Okay so here's the interesting thing:

I could be wrong, but

But that kind of thick ankle cuff is not actually an Indian thing?? At least not in the warrior hero context that a lot of his design seems based on. At least not of that shape and width.

What we do have though are very simple metal ankle cuffs put on (I think) one ankle of young kids for protection,, again a tradition I'm not very familiar with, it's more localised

The other thing we have that's more interesting tho:

We have payals and ghungroos!!! Which opens up so many exciting prospects to me because those are both dancer things

Like. The payals are ornamental. They are beauty things as well. All women would wear them, their elaborateness and style depending on status, money, and region ofc

They double as dance and performance things too ofc

But ghungroos are specifically dance things

Very very sacred and honoured to the dancers, too. Quite personal

(These are all little bells on the ghungroos btw!! Hundreds of them. They ring out when the dancers dance)

This is what Pav's ankle cuffs most remind me of. It's not the same thing ofc, and idk if the designers were even thinking of this.

But it would be really cool if he was inspired by ghungroos to have cuffs of similar thickness and placement on his legs. Perhaps even familiar to him hmmm?

This is me theorizing HARD to support my headcanon, but combined with Pav's classical dance-n-martial-arts-y moves, i present to you: Pav learning classical dance when he was younger (a thing that a lot of Indian kids do and only a few seriously continue for their lives) is real.

I rest my case

Like yeah it's known at this point that Pav's moves are based a lot off the martial art of kalaripayattu. Which is SO AMAZING AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH!!! But I also think this would be a cool influence alongside that, bc it really feels visible too.

No. 8:

The fact that Pavitr is barefoot is so so important and dear to me!!!

In Indian culture, you're supposed to take your shoes off as a mark of respect, before entering the ranabhoomi (literal transl: battleground, but not in an actual war with swords and shit ofc)

Being barefoot for pujas and in temples and on sacred ground in general is very important

As is being barefoot when you're walking onto a kabaddi or wrestling ground,, basically any fight that's supposed to be important and/or with honour. It's a respect thing for the opponent and for the earth you fight on.

There are a lot of contexts where being barefoot is important or a given

There's the prayer ground bc it's sacred and holy and you can't be dragging your dirty ass shoes there it's super disrespectful. You gotta enter with clean feet specifically, dirty feet are considered disrespectful too. that's also why there wil often be feet washing areas outside of temples here

Then there's the ranabhoomi that I just said, which is more of respect for your opponent and the earth. Respect to the earth especially is very important in the combat forms and sports I know of at least

Then there's the basic respect and tbh the hygiene thing too, of always taking off your footwear before entering another persons house. That one is more flexible, sometimes you can take it off inside, but the done thing is to take them off outside generally. Especially if you're a guest who's not particularly close. You'd be considered really rude if you didn't take them off at all. But again that still varies by person,, the older generations are way stricter abt it

Then the bride thing,,, it's actually a whole small ritual. The bride and groom will enter the groom's house for the first time,, which is considered the bride's new home bc misogynistic tradition so yeah. But basically it's supposed to be an auspicious beginning to a new home and life. (Btw being barefoot during the wedding ceremony is also generally required)

Usually, at least in North Indian tradition, a small vessel of rice is kept at the threshold that the bride must tip over with her foot when entering. It's for prosperity. Then she steps directly into a plate of a red liquid I forget the word for, but it's basically a sindoor paste type of thing. Her first steps into the house must be taken leaving those red footprints behind. That's for auspicious beginning

So Pavitr being barefoot is so so cool from a cultural and a character building standpoint

He takes his job seriously, he does it with respect and honour!!! He seems so chill and happy go lucky, but he's deliberate and respectful abt it!! And he's super connected to his culture too, bc you could just Not and no one would care, but it's so important that he does!!

So yeah!

That has been my full ramble askjasjkas. If you made it this far, have a cookie! Thank you and I hope this was interesting <33

[nerdynuala]

SnK Vets & more random headcanons

Because I missed doing these

Mike steals Hange's glasses and pretends to be an intellectual, putting up an exagerated posh accent. Erwin can't stand two minutes of this.

Erwin never apologises whenever he has an argument with someone. He might know he was wrong but he'll never admit it openly and most importantly he's incapable of walking up to the other person and say he's sorry. He either just goes back to normal or does something for the other person, usually related to what the argument was about.

Mike can't lie. If this guy tries to make up some lie or excuse, you'll notice straight away. His body language and his tone are too telling. If he needs to hide something, he just stays quiet, he knows the moment he opens his mouth he's doomed.

Hange lies with ease. She doesn't lie very often, but when she does you have no way to tell she's lying.

Moblit adjusts his pace to Hange, when they walk together they actually move in unison.

Erwin had a bunny when he was a child.

Levi is terrible at dancing. Moving is okay when he knows the steps, but he just move to the rhythm of music. He just can't feel the rhythm. He only dances to classics like waltz, because he needs it to be mechanic, if he has to improvise he just skips. He only stays if he's dancing with Hange and she takes the lead.

Nanaba is extremely skilled at climbing. She climbs trees, walls, anything. She's fast, she finds where to put her hands and feet with a surprising ease.

Mike could sleep literally anywhere. As a kid he used to lie on the floor in front of the chimney and fell asleep there. He could sleep on a branch of a tree and get the best sleep ever.

Erwin has back aches. He likes to crack his back and he usually leans on Mike to stretch. Mike agrees to it but he complains because the sound of Erwin's back cracking freaks him out.

Moblit has an amazing memory. He remembers dates, facts and people's words very easily. He'd be like "you said these precise words on the 18th of april, we were standing next to the stables and the weather was cloudy".

Erwin and Mike have a party in between their birthdays, they call it "brorthday" and it's basically an excuse to get drunk while pretending they are celebrating both their birthdays at once.

Hange keeps a diary. Whenever someone asks, she'd say it's for titan research, but she actually writes the silliest stuff on it. "Asked 15 people. None of them has ever seen a baby pidgeon. I'm starting to think they are born adult".

Levi likes mushrooms. Mushroom soup is a favourite of his and he loves mushroom stroganoff served with rice.

Nanaba's hands and feet are always, always cold. In winter she wears two pairs of sock one on top of the other all the time.

Levi never drinks enough water. Though since he saw Hange squeezing lemons in her water during meals, he does that as well and this allows him to actually have the right amount of water to stay hydrated.

[sempsimps]

Gregory Violet head cannons + NSFW

Season 4 of black butler has me thinking about a certain emo (Gregory not ceil but check out my friend @serve-corps if your into that) but like omfg he's so fine what for and like man wears lipstick I just he's so adorable I've never wanted to own the manga more in my life he's so- I should stop but like aaaaaa so this is head cannons mixed with actual cannon that was on the fandom wiki so that's fun I was thinking of writing a full story later but for now....

this is head cannons, and at the bottom, I'll have a warning for my nsfw thoughts. lol, just remember you're responsible for your Internet consumption, but before i get into this, it's all my opinions. Don't take it as gospel or anything like that, im having fun, alright? okay then.

Little head cannons

-he likes poetry. He gives that vibe like come on...(literally an hour later) Okay, so like, just seen a manga page of him drawing a jabberwocky around ceil like a sleep paralysis demon. a little back story on this particular poem is "a nonsensical poem about the killing of the jabberwocky" in 1871, apparently. this is very relatable to ceil and Gregory alike and like Google it for real (so like I was completely right about that and I didn't even know)

he smells like a mix of charcoal and acrylic paint like dusty but kinda nice, ya know (i go back to this further down)

-why dose he seem like he has autism, i cant explain it but, i have it to, so I'm not trying to be rude, but the bowtie he wears is like a normal tie but looser and nicer. and i hate ties, so i feel that in my soul. he also seems like he wouldn't like synthetic material idfk. also social situations suck, his voice is mostly monotone and quite, its not the typical "not understanding cues or not getting jokes" but its more like a social anxiety thing, and that's usually diagnosed with autism i think? (I'm not a doctor i don't really know. Maybe I'm projecting here a little)

-he's like defo bi or pan or perhaps an ace group. I'm not that educated on that lgbtq+ aspect apologies but that's the vibe (again, that's my opinion)

Dating head cannons male or female [brackets if pointed to someone with tits lol]

-bones. Need I say more? I like bones and rocks soooo be like, otters give him a bone (not like that-) or rocks he strikes me as a rock guy like smooth ones. idk how, but just get one he deserves it.

-painting dates if you struggle, he can easily guide you through it, his hand gently moving to help you use the right brush stroke. he's clearly more skilled in pencil/charcoal works, though we haven't seen much else [that takes skill and I take art like damn that's difficult]

-So apparently the sun and dancing makes him dizzy (it was on the fandom wiki) so definitely have water on hand and well he doesn't seem like the type to like anything plain becuse of the drink mixing so water is a no go to boring and i get that so grab one of those ball tea infusers and make flavoured water he can put the flavours in it like idk lemon slices and let it sit in the water maybe add suger (wait thats just flat lemonade lol whatever I'm a genius ik don't flatter me)

-stolen hoodie? Nah, stollen emo robe looking ass. it seems everyone in purple house has one, and well, yall could swap, or ya know, just wear his. if he has another obvious man is never seen without it, it could be a comfort for him. but like, he seems like he would have a bigger one, and it would smell so nice like charcoal and acrylic paint (that i mentioned earlier). Don't question it, but you can smell that, right? but there's a hint of passion fruit becuse he's trying for you (aw how cute) you can not tell me he doesn't like perfume and like its either passion fruit or cola adjacent like i know it probably wasn't around at the time but like you can see it (maybe i based this on a meme i found but shush)

-you paint each others nails need i say more? and even if you dont like/want to, he would just like to take time off with you to do his own or you do his. oh my god, I just remembered he wears eyeliner the same thing, but he likes you doing it. For some reason, you're better at it, and he doesn't want panda eyes.

-sneaking out at late to hide behind the boarding house, to just chill or chat, looking at the stars. It's a nice area, but yall gotta dodge the house master most of the time. Still, a little thrill never hurt nobody, just maybe given a Y or two if you're caught.

-hiding in your shoulder when the sun or people get too much to deal with. (I feel that so much)

-Gregory is a mix when it comes to pda. Overall, he doesn't like it could be a little overwhelming for him, but when yall with the other prefects, he might hold your hand, he's trying, and we love him for it.

-Gregory seems to observe his friends a lot, and so i think he truly values any relationships he has with anyone. on a whole, he usually draws people that are around him, like ceil, and i think i seen one of Lawrence. (idk i don't have the manga) so i think he would have a lot of sketches of you, be it in his work as doodles, or fully fledge charcoal drawings, maybe even a painting. but he values and enjoys being with you a lot.

-little snacks like fruit and chocolate almost like a picnic in the swan gazebo, but ya know not sharing with everyone unless Gregory wants to, also the fact your with the others in the swan gazebo is becuse, 1 your allowed to be there they've invited others before, 2 you get along with the prefects and drudges and they really don't care, 3 your either his drudge or the first two already applied before hand so you both seen no point in doing that.

okay, so i can't think of anything else wholesome to put down, and i just can't stop thinking, so now this is the warning I REPEAT NSFW BEOYNED THIS POINT!! ALSO HE IS 18-19 ACORDING TO GOOGLE

NSFW head cannons

- some general things, he's a switch or power bottom idk but i can see it so much he prefers you on top, though

-favourite body part would be chest. tits or not [but defo would love them so much like a stress toy] or the space between shoulder and neck, to hide in and bite....(he is a wolf lmao)

-right, so first off lipstick. oh my god... imagining it smeared in places and having prominent marks on your body made by him, like hickeys but removable. and like after he gives head, it would get so messed up on his face or you and just kissing him with it like that, getting some on your lips... (jesus, i need to touch grass)

-he likes art obviously, and well going back to the lipstick and hickeys, he wants to see what colour they turn, your like a brand new canvas just begging to be painted on by him, and honestly vice versa he's too pretty not to mark up..... (no comment)

-this is an all boys school they most likely don't have sex ed here and so you would have to teach him what to do but once he knows it kinda clicks right ya know [another reason i think he would just love titties becuse he wants to learn and i mean like he would get kinda fascinated with them] also he would be really sensitive in general and that's a great advantage to top (but hey you didnt hear that from me 0^0)

okay then that was that and ive run out of ideas now and i need to get this out of me ive got like 2 more things to write about this emo becuse i love and relate to him so much anyway hope that was good i try to be accurate even though this is head cannons and not real at all im still trying to be in character sorry if my writing sucks :)

[lurkingshan]

Love in the Big City: Book Club Schedule

Okay, besties, here we go! Turns out a lot of you are into this nerd project so we will in fact be doing a little tumblr book club for LITBC! Here's how it will work:

We will begin on Sunday, February 4, and discuss a different section of the book each week.

On Sundays, @bengiyo will post a list of discussion questions for whatever part we're reading that week. You can use these as prompts for thinking, actually write and post responses to them, or just ignore them and do your own thing.

We will all write or share whatever we like during the week, using the hashtag [#litbc book club]. Everything from simple reaction commentary to full on essays is welcome. It's also fine not to post anything yourself if that's not your thing, you can participate by reading and sharing other people's posts.

Each following Sunday, I will post a roundup of everything people wrote during the week so we'll have them all collated in one place, and Ben will then post the next round of discussion questions.

This means we are going to be on the following schedule for reading and discussing:

Part 1: Sun, February 4 to Sat, February 10

Part 2: Sun, February 11 to Sat, February 17

Part 3: Sun, February 18 to Sat, February 24

Part 4: Sun, February 25 to Sat, March 2

With the final round up posted on Sunday, March 3. Of course, this is Not That Serious and if you fall behind you should still join in whenever you can and I will add your posts in later! Also, please note for your own planning that Part 2 of the novel is the longest, nearly double the length of the other parts.

For those who asked about where to acquire the book, the good news is it's very popular and generally easy to find translated in English. A lot of libraries carry it, and you can also find it at local bookstores, on Everand, on bookshop.org, and of course, Amazon.

For those who are seeing this for the first time and wondering what the heck I'm on about: go here for background on why we're doing this book club ahead of a couple upcoming drama and film adaptations. And if you want to be tagged into future posts please comment in tags or replies so we can add you to the list! We will also use the tag [#litbc book club] for all posts related to this going forward, so you can just track that tag if you prefer. [Note: if you want to be tagged please check your settings to see if other blogs are allowed to tag you. If you asked to be tagged on the first post and you're not in the list below, it's because tumblr wouldn't allow me to do it.]

Tagging here those who have signed up so far: @alwaysthepessimist @belladonna-and-the-sweetpeas @blalltheway @brifrischu @colourme-feral @dekaydk @dramacraycray @emotionallychargedtowel @fiction-is-queer @hakusupernova @hyeoni-comb @infinitelyprecious @littleragondin @literally-a-five-headed-dragon @loveable-sea-lemon @my-rose-tinted-glasses @neuroticbookworm @poetry-protest-pornography @profiterole-reads @serfergs @so-much-yet-to-learn @starryalpacasstuff @stuffnonsenseandotherthings @sunshinechay @thewayofsubtext @troubled-mind @twig-tea @waitmyturtles @wen-kexing-apologist

Excited to get started with y’all in a few weeks!

[shin-tsucommunist]

new pinned post (●'◡'●)

hey! hiya! i'm ianthe or illi, but honestly you can call me whatever you want as long as it's androgynous :p. i overuse :3 because i am one of the cringe tboy losers of all time

writing blog: https://www.tumblr.com/shinwritesiguess

pronouns are they/he/it i guess. i don't care that much though, go wild with neos and stuff

i'm fifteen unfortunately. birthday is 16th september

scotish-singaporean living in england. a really boring bit of england. i'm part chinese and speak some mandarin, plus n4 japanese. i'm currently trying to learn about eight languages at the same time (i am stupid)

i'm called fyodordostoyrawr on ao3 and have a few cambridge latin course fics + a bsd one and a yttd fic in the works

i am very autistic and use tone markers a lot, and i have super bad anxiety and ocd so sorry if i put reblog bait on your dash ~(>_<。)＼

stuff i like ^_^:

-your turn to die!! my main hyperfixation at the moment

-mcyt, specifically the life series and hermitcraft

-vocaloid! my favourite producers are kikuo and neru

-bungo stray dogs, especially the hunting dogs

-omori

-history and mythology (will expand on this further down)

-my chemical romance

-will wood, lemon demon, tally hall, ghost and pals, other extremely neurodivergent music

-azumanga daioh, yotsuba, nichijou, etc

-madoka magica

-ride the cyclone

-the cambridge latin course

history and myhthology stuff i'm into:

-classical history (greece, persia, rome)

-elizabethan england

-china.

-the mali empire

-vikings, celts, anglo-saxons

-greek, norse, and celtic mythology (the main ones, honestly i'm interested in anything mythology-related)

please interact with me i am cripplingly lonely ヾ(•ω•`)o

mutuals/followers please dm me and send asks and stuff :3

dni:

-bigots obviously (this includes terfs, fuck off)

-nsfw blogs (as previously stated, i'm a minor)

-maps + map supporters

-dream stans

-anyone who still supports iskall

-other icky nasty people

way too many userboxes :P

[chubbletea]

I'm bored. mcsm hcs time

jesse (any prns, bday dec 31st)

genderfluid

reuben helped them sleep, so after they lost him, they had trouble sleeping for years upon years

their music taste is anything and everything. they will go to listening from k-pop to death metal and be unfazed

jesse was fairly little when they met reuben (thinking abt 4-ish??)

they have brightly colored highlights in their hair, and it's style is short and fluffy/messy-looking

only child

doesn't want to get gender surgeries or take hormones or anything

played trumpet in middle school marching band. I'm so sorry for doing them dirty like this but it's the vibes

probably survives off of caffeine. however, this habit got better after they got radar to help

they couldn’t sleep for at least a week after reuben's death, but then they started sleeping with a plushy (probably of a pig), which slowly helped them get back into a semi-regular sleep schedule

they have a nametag necklace with reuben's name engraved on it

petra (she/her, bday feb 20th)

girl kisser. likes kissing women on the lips.

deathly terrified of getting sick. if she got lethally sick before the witherstorm event, she would be like "I'M FINE IT'S NOTHING" but after the witherstorm event if she gets a small cold she freaks tf out

she's a system bc I'm a system and I said so. she has abt five members and has rare splits

her childhood was all over the place

she likes heavier music like green day, blink-182, rob zombie, babymetal, etc.

bassist

did several martial arts and sports as a kid bc she couldn't find one she liked

Idk if I can see her doing marching band but if she did she would be an alto sax player, but like angry section leader alto sax player

lukas is her cousin. she's the only one who gets to call him luke bc that's what he originally went by before changing it to lukas

she's abt three years older than lukas, and she was very present in his childhood. they basically did everything together bc their parents were either fuckasses or straight up not there (L + ratio tbh)

lukas (he/him, bday july 24th)

trans guy. just the vibes

he's a writer. he's into WEIRD GROSS GRAPHIC SHIT. he does not faint when he sees blood or whatever.

while writing his memoir(?) abt the witherstorm journey, he writes so many graphic descriptions abt stuff like petra's illness, inside of the witherstorm, the endermen and other mobs, etc. and asks jesse to read it for criticism and such and then they end up scarred and are like "HUH?? WHO HURT YOU????"

he likes holding his cat like a baby

he's the certified "music nerd" of the group. he thinks his taste is the best

speaking of, he likes stuff like will wood, tally hall/miracle musical, lemon demon, etc. and if anyone ever asks for music recommendations he just fucking appears without warning and talks abt music for three hours

whenever lukas is handed the aux he's like "YOU GUYS WANNA HEAR A BANGER?" and plays 2/3 of a song and talks abt it for another half of it and just does it over again with several songs in a row

played clarinet in middle school-high school band and never wanted to switch bc he was very attached to his instrument

he was also probably a theatre kid. and DEFINITELY a creative writing kid. maybe an art kid too

eventually he started playing electric guitar after school

he used to be *extremely* asocial and introverted, only willingly interacting with his cousin, petra, until he met the ocelots and slowly opened up in his late middle school/early high school years thanks to them

his parents weren't very present in his childhood

throughout most of his childhood he experienced lots of autism related speech loss and was nearly completely nonverbal, but after he started becoming friends with the ocelots, he slowly gained the ability to speak. he still experiences the occasional speech loss to this day, but he's much better than he was a while back

he's the youngest member of the order

one year on t

took a few classes with olivia at one point, but they never rlly talked. he might've glanced at her one or two times tho

picked up traditional art as an extra hobby, still mostly focuses on writing

he has severe gender dysphoria and has had top surgery, but refuses to get bottom surgery, simply bc he doesn't want to.cdespite this, he stills makes jokes abt having a cock

axel (they/he, bday may 7th)

met jesse before olivia met jesse

his music taste consists of only meme songs. the first time he was handed the aux, he played two trucks. the second time he was handed the aux, he rickrolled everybody. he is now banned from the aux.

he's the oldest member of the order

has no idea how sympathy works (real!)

olivia (she/they, bday apr 12th)

former gifted kid vibes. definitely went to a private school at some point

has always looked up to ellegaard since she was little

took a few classes with lukas at one point, but they never rlly talked. olivia prolly thought abt trying to talk to him at one point tho

major art kid vibes

3-4+ years on e, got bottom surgery a little more than a year ago

she drew jesse a picture of reuben shortly after his death to try and cheer them up

radar (he/they, bday oct 16th)

bisexual and questioning if he's non-binary

it's said that he is both jesse's assistant and and intern, so that could mean he's in high school. I debated for a little bit whether he would be a junior or senior but I decided that he would be one of the older juniors (around 17 years old)

sometimes he has to miss/be late to help jesse with work or whatever bc he has schoolwork to do

definitely a hardcore theatre kid.

it's also sorta implied that radar has some sort of crush on jesse so I like to imagine that jesse is like his celebrity crush or whatever. ofc that's never gonna go through as an actual relationship or whatever

radar does mention at one point that he loves seafood so I like to imagine he encourages jesse to try seafood with him and stuff. he also definitely isn't scared to try and actually likes some of the "weird" stuff (ex. tako)

he rlly trusts jesse and likes talking to him bc he doesn't rlly have a good outlet. I like to think jesse just listens/lets him vent

he tries to go help jesse as much as he possibly can bc his home life isn't particularly great (by that I mean it's terrible)

he's the type to go "SO FUNNY STORY-" and then traumadump like it's nothing (srsly get him some therapy)

definitely has a squishmallow collection AND keeps all the tags

[instantrp]

Rules & More

Read carefully before submitting a roleplay ad.

There are many rp-partner-finders out there. This one does things a little differently.

I. This blog does not accept submissions, requests, or blog follows from users under the age of 18. If you're under 18 please understand that this is for your own safety. Stay in the shallow end of the pool.

II. This blog accepts submissions and requests for topics others might find disturbing and acts that are only condoned in fiction. But do not go into potentionally triggering detail when submitting a request.

III. If you want to do a fandom roleplay, mention the full fandom name so it can be tagged accordingly.

VI. This is where we will separate the wheat from the chaff. I'm asking you to life a little dangerously. Go past the black wall. yada, yada.

Instead of posting a wishlist on what your partner should smell like and do for a living to be deserving of your precious time. Post a starter that inspired your submission, or simlpy post a scene you've written that relates to your current request. Anything to get the roleplay off the ground. Many roleplays die in the plotting stage, I hope this measure counterattacks that.

Perhaps you don't have any idea on where to take it, but that's half the fun of roleplay. Getting pushed into an entirely different corner.. Of course you guys can just bypass anything I've said once you've got each other's dms but... try it out. WRITE FIRST, TALK LATER.

Tagging system

Below you'll find some categories and examples of the tagging system used on this blog.

Ages: eighteen-plus twenty-one-plus twenty-five-plus

Citrus scale: Orange Lime Lemon

Genres: irp: fantasy irp: dystopian irp: horror irp: slice of life irp: historical romance

OC or Fandom: rp: OC rp: 'Stranger things' rp: 'Cyberpunk 2077'

Pairings: FxF FxM FxNB FxAny MxM MxNB MxAny NBxNB NBxAny AnyxAny

Topics: irp: Found family irp: Soulmate irp: Slow burn

[observational-joint]

Long Overdue Introduction Post!

My wack internet alias is ObservationalJoint, and I'm the deadly combination of a nerd and an artistic Jack of all Trades. I love Science Fiction and Pop Culture, and creating fanart and OC stuff alike.

If you'd like to ask, yap, or interact with me in any way, do not hesitate to use my ask box! I don't bite and love all kinds of interaction. Especially the kind I could make content (art/rants/theories/headcanons) out of because I struggle to think up stuff for content LOL

More About Me:

I haven't established strong enough of a presence here to be given nicknames, but calling me OJ or Gup should suffice!

I live in the Pacific Northwest of the USA

I am apagender, which means I am apathetic about what gender or pronouns are used in reference to me. I'm also asexual!

I am 22 years old as of writing this, which makes me a baby in many of the fandoms I dwell within.

I am a multimedia artist, but I especially create digital art and animation. I will make art out of anything, including glass and carbonized toast. I have done both these things.

My all-time favorite media is Fringe, PLEASE talk to me about it. It needs so much more love! My brain and heart are occupied with a plethora of theories and headcanons, and I'd love to hear yours!! (Ironically I hated it when it first aired, because I was in elementary school and was horrified by the gruesome parts haha)

I love science of all kinds, especially relating to biology and oceanography. I'm also knowledgable about earth science, like seismology and meteorology! I love living on this wacky planet.

I am in remission from an ugly fight I had with follicular thyroid cancer in 2021, but despite this and the multitude of problems it caused, I vibe! Hell yeah!

I represent myself with a poorly drawn, monochromatic cat man with very few polygons. This is because I have always been captivated by the concept of Dark Watchers/Men in Black and the paranormal overall.

My favorite musical artists are David Bowie, Bear Ghost, The Killers, Sleeping at Last, Journey, Depeche Mode, Green Day, Lemon Demon, and Coldplay

Fandoms:

Faves:

Fringe, Gravity Falls, Mouthwashing, Star Trek, SCP, Smiling Friends, Super Mario Galaxy

On My Watchlist:

Stargate, Twin Peaks, Severance, Final Space, The Librarians, The Twilight Zone, Transformers, Godzilla, Farscape, Lost, Sonic, Portal, Half-Life, OFF, The Magnus Archives

Note:

Only interact with my blog if you are 16+, I do not post graphic NSFW content but suggestive stuff may be briefly mentioned or joked about! I may be ace but I am comfortable with such topics.

Please do not interact if you are a bigot (LGBTphobic, sexist, racist, etc)! I also detest proshipping and any way it festers.

I am very nervous about sharing my content, and I might chicken out and delete things shortly after posting them. Please be patient with me, I struggle with consistency and anatomy in my art, and I have trouble composing my thoughts via text. I welcome criticism but please try to be nice!

I cherish diversity and adore all things weird. If you thinking you might come off as weird or awkward bars you from reaching out, then just know I uplift and embrace cringe so long as it doesn't hurt anyone.

[em-nikolaev]

A Few Study Tips For Back To School Season

Let's just ignore that I'm procrastinating my studies to write this, but I hope you find this helpful!

Funny little songs! Making up little songs can be a great way to remember specific terms and formulas, you can either make your own up or use that one song that's been stuck in your head for the past week and make some lyrical flashcards

Desk! Desk! Desk! So, if you're anything like me, you may have a desk at home, but in class you have to move around a lot, so how I remember things is I write important dates on the back of my hand, and when I get home to my study area, I put any important dates/tasks on sticky notes and stick them on my desk with the goal of clearing the sticky note clutter by violently ripping each of the notes off when I've completed a task

The Sound of Silence! If you're studying a subject that requires language of any kind (So basically anything but equations) try to listen to instrumental music, as your brain will be less busy trying to understand the lyrics and more focused on work (I hate to say it, but I really struggle to implement this one, but when I do my productivity goes through the roof) Some playlist suggestions: Debussy, Sleeping Jazz, Fauré, and Schubert (I'm related to him, so I'm a little biased on this one)

Make it a story! This is a great way to remember systems, but make anything a story, sneek details into the plot of your study story, as an example, let's say I'm studying chemical bonds and how they work, Ionic are iconic because the more électronégative take what they deserve, quite girlboss of them.

DRINK WATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF!!!!! I cannot stress this enough, DRINK WATER!!! Put a little lemon in it, do whatever you need to do, but please drink water, I know this is quite anecdotal, but I used to go without drinking water all day, and I never had the energy to study or do anything fun when I came home, resulting in my grades slipping, but after drinking water and taking care of my bodily needs I really felt on top of it, I don't know who needs to hear this, but being a student doesn't mean you have to suffer, it doesn't mean you have to live a monastic lifestyle, you can take care of yourself and be a successful student all at the same time, it doesn't always feel like it but YOU CAN!

[rainee-da]

Hey I like your wroting, pls keep up the good work 🙌🏻 i was wondering why u use emoji for character sometimes tho

Heyy anon thank you so much! I'm glad you like the fics that I made 🍀

I'm not really sure about what you mean by that, but if you're talking about the emoji I put after each character's name, it is indeed intentional and there are interesting reason for it! (at least I think it's interesting lol)

It's gonna be unnecessarily long so read down below if you happen to be interested with this one! (for some reasons)

I'm used to indulge to my fantasy via X (Twitter) a lot, especially since there are many Character X Reader fanarts created by JP's artists being posted on twitter. But in japanese fandom's twitter culture, there are many unspoken rules as to how to tag/title your work for the sake of decluttering/censoring/gatekeeping (idk how to best phrase that lol) and it is especially important to learn it if you want your work to reach to their demographics as well.

As for emojis, many people often used the unofficial fandom's designated emojis to tag their work/tweet/ instead of typing the actual name of the character, this is so they'll not clutter the hastag itself with their artworks/fic. Especially since sometimes there are character with similar names to one character in another fandom / the character's name itself is similar with a certain slang/noun/place.

The best example for this is Epidem from Mashle, since if you put the katakana of his name on twitter search engine you will be directed to a news/threads/tweets that is talking about 'epidemic'. It will be troublesome if someone who doesn't know anything about Mashle ended up finding random fanart about Epidem when they tried to find news related to 'epidemic', right? that's why tagging it with the designated emoji/term for that character will be more preferrable in this case.

If you want to know the designated emoji for each character in Mashle, here are the list of some that I've known;

ADLER DORM

Mash Burnedead = 🍄

Finn Ames = 🐬

Lance Crown = 🪐

Dott Barret = 💥

Lemon Irvine = 🍋

Rayne Ames = ☔

Max Land = 🎈

LANG DORM

Abel Walker = 🪆/🧸

Abyss Razor = 🎭

Wirth Madl = 🕶️

Love Cute = 💗

Milo Genius = 🎓

Olore Andrew = 🦈

Anser Shinri = ⚙️

ORCA DORM

Margarette Macaron = 🎼

Carpaccio Luo-Yang = 🍥

Tron Morceau = 🎺

Cello Morceau = 🎻

DIVINE VISIONARY

Ryoh Grantz = ✨

Orter Madl = ⏳

Kaldo Gehenna = 🍯

Renatus Revol = ✝️

Agito Tyrone = 🐉

Sophina Biblia = 📕

Tsurara Halestone = ❄️

WALKIS ACADEMY

Domina Blowelive = 💧/🌊

Levis Rosequartz = 🧲

Lovie Rosequartz = ⚡

Charles Contini = 📞

Galuf Gargaron = 👅

Kenny Clark = 🧊

Malcolm Curtis = 🪲

MAGOL CASTLE

Innocent Zero = ⏰/🕰️

Cell War = 💎

Doom = 🪞/🥞

Famin = 🤡/🎪/🃏

Epidem = 🍮

Delisaster = 🍾

That is the reason I put certain emoji for certain character. It's just because I often do that when I talk to other ppl about Mashle & I thought it would be nice to apply that to my writing!

There are (obviously) many others that I didn't write here because I didn't know, and I can't say for certain that what I describe up below is the correct explanation for this. For that reason, feel free to leave comments if you wish to add more/correct my post!

Well, that is all. Thank you for reading all of that mumbo-jumbo I just wrote up there 🍀 sorry if it's messy.... i know it is....

[the-music-phantoms]

- how did you get your system name?

- funniest out of context system quote?

- favorite system holiday?

- do you have subsystems?

- what is switching like for you?

- are there any hobbies you all have?

- what's your headcount?

- do your alters/headmates have different voices or speech patterns?

- does anyone in your system like art?

- how easily does the system split?

- is your system fictive-heavy? factive-heavy? neutral?

- what songs remind you of your alters/ headmates?

- how much amnesia do you experience?

- what do your alters/headmates do in their free time?

what is headspace like for you?

- are there any non-human alters/ headmates?

- what songs remind you of your alters/ headmates?

? - how much amnesia do you experience?

- what do your alters/headmates do in their free time?

- what is headspace like for you?

- are there any non-human alters/ headmates?

- what do you all do to recharge?

- how does the system cope with stress?

- how did you discover your system?

- do any alters help out with school/work?

- who are your frequent fronters?

- I love you all, my sweet little Phantomssssss ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

- have you ever bought your alters/ headmates things?

- what are your introjects/fictives usually sourced from?

-🌀&🧜‍♀️

1. The host's online last name, (we don't remember how they got it tbh) plus the fact we like music =the music phantoms/ the Phantom sys

2. "Holy fuck, I'm being harassed by clowns again"

3. I don't think we have one, our fav holiday syswide would be our birthday because yes :]

4. Yes, including the Raine subsys and a few others

5. Usually painful tbh, our head drops and our eyes roll into the back of our head and it hurts but we also have times where we didn't even realize we had switched and nothing really happens soooo

6. fanfiction writing, makeup type stuff, anything horror related

7. Idk, somewhere over 60

8. Sometimes, the children all have a slight baby voice and some alters message more chaoticly than others and some have typing quirks

9. Ehhhh, we all suck at doing it but all somewhat enjoy it

10. Semi easily- it depends but we usually don't split too often

11. Fictive heavy

12. Raine reminds me of Lemons by Cavetown

13. I don't remember/j (but seriously, a bit but not as much as you may think-)

14. Mostly just hang out and cause chaos tbh

15. Big. We have the house where almost everybody has a room, the circus, the bar, the ruins, the forest, the basement in the house etc

16. Yes, lots :,]

17. Sleep, talk to our partners and bestie, watch Tv/ youtube; listen to music etc

18. Honestly, just cry about it usually

19. There's never been a time without us, as far as the host remembers we've always been here. We only got "discovered" when they finally found the name for it (did)

20. Yes, mainly Kiyo, Kayda, and Sunny

21. It changes a lot but is currently Eyera, Raine, Kai, TV, and Rodrick

22. Ehsieuuehdjdjeheu- <333333333

23. Yes, cosplay items, charms they liked, plushies etc

24. Danganronpa tbh- or whatever our Brain is hyperfixated on at the time.

[r04dk1llx2]

Raye’s Hellhole // Introductionִ ࣪𖤐

“ Sorry, Venkman, I'm terrified beyond the capacity for rational thought. “

Howdy, i’m Raye, i’m a digital artist / writer / taxidermist. I use all pronouns but prefer they/them, am bisexual, and monogamous. I love talking to people, so don’t be afraid to DM me or contact me on my discord acc, r04dk1ll_w4nn4b3 !!

TW: this account will post/reblog nsfw content (writing/art)

DNI: homophobes//pedophiles//sexists//racists//etc.

Im interested in taxidermy, bone collecting, digital art, writing, nsfw art/writing, the paranormal, cryptids, horror movies, movies in general, metal/rock/emo/y2k/80s/alternative music, hillbilly gothic/country/grunge/trashy/goth/emo fashion and aesthetics, driving, researching, deer, and foraging

Media/Fandoms/Celebrities/etc. that i’m into; Josh Hutcherson, Christian Bale, Harold Ramis, Jerma985, Kurtis Conner, Oompaville, Burn (2019), Ghostbusters, American Psycho (2000), Re-Animator (1985), FNAF, Future Man, The Thing (1982), The Evil Dead (1981), The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974), Creep (2014), My Bloody Valentine (1981), Beetlejuice, The Walten Files, Don’t Hug Me I’m Scared, Local 58, GREYLOCK, Killer Frequency, Puppet Combo games, Nickelback, Ayesha Erotica, Lemon Demon, Ice Nine Kills, Acid Bath, Millionaires, TV Girl, My Darkest Days, Rob Zombie, Cold, Japan, Deftones, Misfits, and Cocteau Twins.

Characters i write/draw for; Billy (Burn), Egon Spengler, Patrick Bateman, Derek Danforth, Mike Schmidt, Josh Futturman, Clapton Davis, and Ray Stantz // Requests are open for both writing and art //

I will NOT write/draw anything related to pedophilia, incest, zoophilia, rape, etc.

Tags:

#r04dk1llx2 - art/writing

#aeternalis - oc posting

#rayegoingfuckinginsane - exactly what the tag sounds like

That’s all, have a nice stay.

[djarinbabysnotes]

I'm at that point in my 20s where I'm beginning to reassess my standpoint as a fanfic writer (shocking!) and for half of my teenage years, my unhealthy access of smut (called lemons at the time) were... You know... Shameful. I am wrapped in shame every time I remember the fact that I read badly written smut from Wattpad and Quotev at age 13 and thought that was the Citizen Kane of Internet Literature. By 14, I began drafting such fantasies while being a loser in my bedroom who had never even had sex yet. It was quite the experience to hide that part of my life while still going to church with my very religious parents. By that time, I also began to explore my gender and sexuality.

However, with my newfound acceptance with my own gender expression (I love being a she/they who wears binders on some days and freeing the nipple on other days!) as well as my sexuality (These fictional men are throwing me off but I'm mostly into girls!) it has been the craziest learning experience to understand that the shame I felt with anything sex-related was just because of, well, Catholicism! I left the church 4 years ago and while I still have some of that Catholic guilt lingering as an annoying side effect, I've mostly been proud of the way I have deleted the stigma of sex in my brain. I'm a person with needs. I use all sorts of protection because I feel safe that way. Research is important to make myself feel good. And most importantly, you know what? Smut is one of the greatest girlhood clubs we have ever created in the fanfic community! If the kinks you have are not my kinks? Then I'll politely scroll away. If this very specific thing that a character said really shook my nervous system for a whole week? Then I'll reblog it with my own insane commentary on the tags because I have the tendency to be mysterious with the things I like but I ALSO like to yap about the things that I like. That's the beauty of this little club. I'm in my 20s while swimming through the oceans of fanfic veterans who paved the way from fanfiction dot net, the gen z losers who also found solace in wattpad and quotev, the blurb/oneshot obsessed idiots who were on tumblr around 2013 and never left... We are all here to defeat the common enemy: bot comments on ao3.

ANYWAYS! Long story short, I wanna thank the fanfic community for shaping me through Y/N's beautiful orbs and blushing cheeks. The most insane mood board outfits with the teal skirts and striped shirts, as well as the way I stutter my words, all came from the gift that keeps on giving. The evolution of this craft raised me to be the person that I am today.

And hey, if I really need to say it out loud: I might start writing the nastiest, horniest smut. I haven't published any smut publicly, and I haven't actually written smut in a while. But hey, if the fanfic vets have taught me anything, it is to just write what feels right, and if the shame hits, then those tumblr notes will be in that puddle of shame with you.