#I'm in a good mood!!!! It's also 5 am!!!!! I'm going to sleep!!!!!

[cupcakesmoothie]

I hope every day people look at me being weird and go wtf is she doing and the answer is loving being alive

[petew21-blog]

Friends with benefits

Two long time friends Trent and Brett. A classic story. Met in kindergarten and have been friends since. Grew up together. Spent their holidays together. Graduated together. But then stopped seeing each other as often. Why? Because adult life ain't easy. Brett had to find a job while Trent got into college, graduated and on top of that became a fitness influencer. Brett started his Twitch account and became a gamer, which he had time for, cause how he was constantly doing a different job, depending on what he could find. But both of them always took some time off for a beer with their buddy.

This is Trent

Although he doesn't appear like that, he is a 24 year old male with young looks

On the other hand Brett is also young, but his looks are a bit more mature. Maybe it's because of all the hair

This is Brett

So hairy.

Normal guys, right? Well something was about to change very soon

Friday, August 2nd, 5 PM

Brett:"Hey, dude. Wanna grab a beer later tonight?"

Trent:"Yeah, sure. I am down. Is 8:30 ok? I gotta finish a video"

Brett:"Oh yeah, totally fine. See you then"

Friday, August 2nd, sports bar, 8:33 PM

At the bar Brett waits patiently, only his leg is slightly shaking. Trent comes in through the door. It's kinda funny, cause Trent used to be really insecure and not confident. Now he looks basically like a god. But still, he has this cute shy looking guy whose face doesnt match his body and the fact that he's 24. Brett was kinds jealous, most of the people that didn't know him always thought he was older because of his looks. Trent had the opposite problem. Always had to show ID whenever he went. Yet Brett was probably more jealous about his life in general. He finished school, took great care of his body, which now could help him hook up with anyone he would set his mind to.

Brett:"Hey, maaaan. How are you doing?"

Trent:"Heyyy. Yeah good. You know, single influencer life, haha"

Brett:"The ladies must be driving you crazy"

Trent:"If only it were just ladies. Haha. You should see the messages some of these gay dudes keep sending me. It's insane"

Brett:"You tell me. They always send random shits to my chats while playing. But it's mostly dumb kids."

Trent:"I think we should find you a date for tonight"

Brett:"Nahhh, fuck it. I'm not in the mood. I just wanna chat with my bro."

After a few beers

Brett:"Shut up, you did not!"

Trent:"I swear. She came on to me without a word."

Brett:"So what did you do?"

Trent:"You think I put up a fight? Haha"

Brett:"Maaaan. I want this stuff to happen to me to. That's so hot"

Trent:"Come with me to the gym then, I bet more chicks woukd be into you if you would gain some muscles"

Brett:"You calling me fat?"

Trent:"No, just saying that all that body hair would be good to match with a good body. You're just a walking gorilla right now"

Brett:"Oh shut up twink! Haha"

They finished their drinks, said their goodbyes and went home.

Brett felt amazing. He really needed to get a beer with his best friend. He came back home, sat behind his computer and searched Dark web. He already knew what he was looking for. He wanted to mess with Trent. Just a another one of his pranks. All he needed was Trent's personal item. He found the body swapping website. He read the rules and conditions and filled out his and Trents name. The only next step he had to follow was to go to sleep. And so he did. Only taking off his shirt in the process and collapsing on the bed. Not even brushing his teeth

Brett woke up feeling better than ever. He was used to have a hangover by now, but today he felt great. He opened his eyes and immediately noticed the different sheets. He looked around. This is Trent's place.

Brett:"Trent?" he said, but he heard Trent's voice.

He turned around to get up

His body. He has a different body

Brett:"Holy shit. It worked" he said amused. He looked down at his now soft chest. He got up

Brett:"Oh wow. getting up is so different when you have these hard muscles"

He went to the nearest mirror. And there he was. Trent in his glory. Brett was so happy right now. His prank worked. He is now inside of his best friends body. And the pranks probably won't stop there. Now he can mess with him all he wants. But not now.

He looked from top to bottom how tall and slim his body was. "Almost no hair anywhere. Lucky guy"

He took Trent's phone and snapped a photo to send it to Trent in his body. He knew it would take a while for Trent to wake up so he proceeded in his exploration.

He felt his curly hair. "How come you don't even have widow's peak? So unfair" He traced his jawline, now with tiny baby hair that Brett wouldn't even call a beard. But his sight was now caught by those nice Calvin Klein's. He looked around as if there was someone in the room with him who would judge him. He pulled on the waistband

Brett:"Just as I thought. Also shaved" he grabbed his new dick, that was getting harder and harder by the second, when suddenly his phone received a notification. he let go of his dick

It was Trent. Brett:"Haha, this is gonna be good"

There was a photo of Brett's body, observing his hairy armpits in shock

Trent in Brett's body:"Hey. Got any idea why I am a gorilla now? And why that gorilla looks exactly like you?"

Brett:"Surpriseee. And fuck you"

Trent:"So this is your doing?"

Brett:"Yeah, I kinda wanted to prank you somehow for all the pranks and the gorilla jokes. Joke's on you ape man"

Trent:"Fuck you. So this is reversible?"

Brett:"Sure, man. No worries. We'll meet tonight at the bar again and chat how our day went?"

Trent:"I don't know how to feel about this, bro"

Brett:"Just try enjoying being another person"

Trent:"Do you realise there are some no go things including intimate stuff and hygiene?"

Brett:"Sure I do. I'm already holding your dick in YOUR hands right now"

Trent:"Dude! Not cool. I meant more stuff like shitting etc. But yeah, this too."

Brett:"I gotta say Trent. You have a very nice dick"

Trent:"I'll comment on your size when I find it in the bushes I guess. Have you never heard of trimming?"

Brett:"Keeping it natural, baby face"

Trent:"Fine, let's see each other tonight at 8, ok?"

Brett:"Enjoyyy" Hangs up

Trent:"Jesus, this guy. I hope he doesn't fuck up something or someone"

Starts observing himself. "I must say, It feels good to look like a mature man and not a teenager. All of this hair. And the moustache is hot too. I could never grow this thing"

Trent looked down and had a mischievous thought. "Well, Brett. Since you have already held my dick, I think it's time to step it up. Gonna see if you can last longer than I do" Trent said with a smile and whipped out his new hard hairy dick

Saturday August the 3rd, bar, 8:04 PM

Brett is sitting amused in the bar, eating chips on the table and drinking beer. Winking at the ladies looking at his direction.

A waitress came by his table:"Want another?"

Brett noticed his old incoming body:"Sure, and another one for my friend who just arrived. Thank you, sweetheart" he said as his flirtatious look almost seduced the local waitress

Trent:"You need to stop!"

Brett:"What? I was just flirting"

Trent:"Not that. Stop eating those chips. God knows how many calories you ate already"

Brett:"So you don't mind that I was flirting with her?"

Trent:"Nah, I don't care. I jerked off your dick for like the fifth time half an hour ago"

Brett:"What? You beast. I would have never expected that. Cool. You have a really good dick to jerk off too. I didn't expect to shoot so far tho. Made a bit of a mess"

A couple off bikers started eavesdropping to their conversation and turning heads

Trent:"You might want to quiet down, or we're gonna get beaten up for mistakenly speaking like gay guys"

Brett:"But you gotta admit that my body is not so bad, right? All the hair and everything. You like it"

Trent:"It's not bad, but I prefer being in my own body. I'm used to it."

Brett:"Ok, I'll pretend I didn't hear the part before about masturbation. But what do you say? We didn't even have enough time to see what the life is like in our new bodies. It's only been a day"

Trent:"And your point is?"

Brett:"Let's stay swapped for a while. We can swap back anytime we want. It's reversible. We know almost everything about each other, so pretending to be the other one will be easy. You'll just teach me your workout routine, I'll show you... what games to play and how to set up a livestream and we'll figure it out"

Trent:"Livestream? That's all you got?"

Brett:"Come on, man. We got nothing to loose"

Trent:"I don't know man. It's gonna be complicated. I agreed to leave for a few weeks to work at one of our gym branches in another city. And now you'll be the one that has to go. I think now is not the best time"

Brett:"So? I can update you about everything. We can chat all the time. We can call. And I got nothing to do. Actually, you might need to find some job for those few weeks. And there's never gonna be a better time then now. We're single, ready to mingle. So let's enjoy that month"

Trent:"You wanna stay swapped the whole tíme I'm gone?"

Brett:"Yeah, I'll be a fitness instructor/viral star and you'll ne enjoying my chill life"

Trent:"Chill life. Man, you won't even recognise your life when we'll swap back"

Brett:"So you agree?"

Trent:"Yeah, what the hell. I'll be a gorilla for a month"

Brett:"Deal. Now, let's see if you'll have a better game in finding a hookup then me"

Sunday, August 4th

Brett sends a text to Trent:"Why do I feel like my body still hasn't gone through puberty?"

Trent:"Piss off. Yours looks like it went trough yours several times."

Brett:"Nah, gotta be honest. I'm really enjoying this lean figure and hairless body"

Trent:"And my dick..."

Brett:"Haha, yeah and your dick. How are you doing in my body?"

Trent:"Feels pretty weird to be so hairy, but gotta admit it's a nice change. Like... feeling so manly"

Brett:"Yeah, but tip for that hairy stomach. Don't cum on it. It's really irritating to get cum from it"

Trent:"Never had the issue in my body, so yeah. Thanks for the tip"

Brett:"No problem. I had to try it out in yours haha"

Trent:"Doesn't this feel kinda gay to you? All the dick and jerk off talk. Appreciating each other's bodies"

Brett:"Nah. We're exploring, man. Who knows if we ever get that chance. Gotta enjoy it"

Wednesday August 7th

Trent:"How are you settling in?"

Brett:"Yeah. Pretty great. I just jerked off to some porn"

Trent:"Ew. I mean the appartement"

Brett:"Whooops. Sorry. Right. Yeah it's nice. Very clean. Very modern"

Trent:"It's yours only for a month so don't destroy anything there"

Brett:"It's kinda poetic right. New appartement, new body, new job"

Trent:"I don't see anything poetic about me playing games in front of a camera"

Brett;"Dude you have to. My fans are gonna wonder what happened to me"

Trent:"Fine. I'll log in tonight. By the way. Dude your feet smell so much when you work out."

Brett:"Work out? You took my body to the gym?

Trent:"Yeah. I had to show off these bushes somewhere, right?"

Brett:"Ahhh thanks man. Looking good"

Trent:"And I think oke girl was checking you... me out"

Brett:"If you can score than go for it. I'm actually late for a date. Or... how do you call it if you're just gonna have dinner and fuck?"

Trent:"Standard hook up man. Please be safe. Wear a condom. And watch our foe those carbs, man."

Brett:"Sure thing, bye"

Monday, August 12 th

Brett:"Dude do you like ever have to shave your face?"

Trent:"Sure I do. I just don't have to do it so often as you. Btw can I please shave off this moustache?"

Brett:"Absolutely not. You'll learn to love it and appreciate it. Just like I will your baby face"

Saturday, August 17th

Brett:"I have to admit I really love showing off your muscles man. I have been doing it constantly at every occassion. So many people turn their heads to take a peak"

Trent:"Yeah I get it. It helps with the confidence a bit"

Brett:"A bit? I feel like I can beat any fucker whk crosses me"

Trent:"Brett, please don't beat anyone in my body"

Brett:"Just kidding, man. How have you been"

Trent:"Well I tried being consistent with the gym. I think your body is doing pretty well"

Brett:"Daaaamn bro. I look good. You really do take care of my body really well"

Trent:"I was actually thinking I could offer this for money. Swapping with people, doing their routines and then swap back. But that's a talk for another time after we swap back"

Brett:"Yeha, sure. Cool idea. Anyway... how was the streaming?"

Trent:"I don't know, man. I think they are desperste for me to say your catchphrases, but they are so cringe."

Brett:"Nah, you have to do that. That's how you get into Tiktoks and become viral"

Trent:"Honestly. I can't wait to get back to my body and to my life back. So we will swap on September 2nd?

Brett:"Yeah. I suppose. Depends how the work will be etc. Anyway I gotta go man. Talk soon"

Trent to himself:"It feels like he's avoiding me with amswering more and more. Trent rubbed his hairy chest, recalling his sweet soft pecs that he missed.

Thursday, August 22nd

Trent:"Hey, man. How is it going?"

Friday, August 23rd

Trent:"Hey. I just wanna know if you're ok. I just wanna talk about the reversal."

Saturday:"please call me back as soon as possible"

Sunday, August 25th

Brett:"I'm ok"

Trent:"What the hell happened?"

Brett:"Nothing I just felt like I needed a break from phone and that stuff"

Trent:"Brett you didn't answer the phone for 4 days"

Brett:"Ok, I was avoiding you, cause I kinda fucked up and was afraid to tell you"

Trent:'What did you do? Is my body ok?"

Brett:"Yeah your body is unharmed. Nothing that bad. We just had a party in the appartement. Broke the TV and... I had unprotected sex with one girl. She didn't know if she was pregnant or not. So I was waiting. And congrats. You're not gonna be a dad"

Trent:"Brett..."

Brett:"I know. I'm so sorry. Won't happen again. Promise. I just got drunk once and it led to this. I'll be good now"

Trent:"Please, don't do anything anymore. I want to switch back"

Brett:"Nah man. We still gotta week to finish. You said until September 2nd."

Trent:"I didn't know you'd do something like this"

Brett:"Please Trent. I'm begging you. Just that one week"

Trent:"Fine. But don't do anything else!"

Sunday, September 1st

Brett:"Hey. Are you packed yet?"

Trent:"Hey. Not really. I planned on packing tommorow. You can come and help if you got time"

Brett:"Sure. I'll come by"

Monday, September 2nd

Trent arrives to the appartement. Brett is on the couch playing video games

The TV is new and there is a PlayStation on the table

Trent:"You didn't tell me you got back into gaming and that you bought all this."

Brett:"Yeha, I missed it. I thought to myself that you'd like it too. So I bought it. By the way. You should see how the fans dig it"

Trent:"Fans? You're live streaming in my body?"

Brett:"Yeah. The gamers are so into it when I'm flexing in the spare time. I even got a viral Tiktok already!"

Trent:"I think we should swap back, Brett. My life is out of your control now."

Brett:"I'm just using all the goods, man. You don't like my body anymore?"

Trent:"Stop changing the subject. I want to swap back"

Brett:"Ok... but on one condition"

Trent:"You want money?"

Brett;"Nah I want to have sex with my body. I want to have sex with you."

Trent:"You have lost your mind"

Brett:"Oh come on. Admit it, that you thought about it. Who gets the chance to fuck their body? To watch their body in the most animalistic moments from somebody else eyes?" Brett flexes his biceps to let Brett watch

Trent:"Brett..."

Brett stands up and goes towards Trent

Brett:"You know you want to kids thus face. To suck this hard dick" he says holding tightly his hardening bulge

Trent:"I... I do. I want to suck my dick"

Brett:"Atta boy"

They begin making out. The fast movements heading towards the bedroom could be described as chaotic, but for them it was a dance of passion. Brett was ripping his old clothes from his old body was all over his body, kissing his neck. Sucking each part of his skin

The kissed even more

Brett began to be more dominant. He gripped Trent's now receding hairline and pushed him down to suck his dick. Trent was choking. But did his best to swallow most of the shaft he now had. He had his dick in his mouth. He couldn't believe it. He is straight and he is sure of that. But this is absolutely different

Brett took his old body by the neck, choking him. "Say you love being in my body"

Trent:"Brett I can't breathe"

Brett:"Fine, let's do this the hard way"

He turned him around. Trent now on all fours. He knew what was coming, but he wasn't ready

Brett spit in his hand and spread it all over the head od his dick. Ready to penetrate his old hairy hole

Trent:"Brett wait... I... Ahhhhhhhh". Trent screamed in pain

Brett:"Yeah. Sorry about that. I'm just so horny. I love your body, Trent. I love every inch od it. Admit you like mine"

Trent:"Brett, please slow down"

Brett:"Naaah, you'll get used to it in a sex"

Trent:"Please, get lube or something"

Brett spit again to where his dick was penetrating Trent's ass. Brett:"Should do it"

Trent was still in pain, but now a new feeling was making him feel better. The pain was now... pleasant? He wanted to feel more. With every thrust from Brett. He felt like shitting himself and cumming at the same time

Brett:"Admit it. Admit you love being in my body" he sped up. Thrusting painfully.

Trent:"Yeah.... yes..."

Brett:"Louder"

Trent:"I do... I love your body. I love being you"

Brett:"Ahhhh. I'm gonna cum. Turn around. I want to cum on your chest"

Trent turned around. He could feel cum leaking from his dick. And now he saw his old face like he never did before. Brett was so into it. His face was full of lust, rage and mischief.

Brett:"Ahhhh. I'm cumming!"

The cum shot all over Trent. Not only on his chest, but also on his mouth and face

Trent watched in awe what just happened.

Brett:"Whew. That was a ride wasn't it? First gay sex. Am I right?"

Trent:"Brett... I?"

Brett:"Oh sorry. I have to catch my breath. You look so funny with my cum all over you. Haha. By the way. I'm glad you love your new body. You get to keep it"

Trent:"Brett, you said we would swap"

Brett:"Yeah I did. That's true. But after this little 'cum over your face' and 'dick in your ass' we made it permanent"

Trent watched in shock as his old body was still standing on top of him. Breathing rapidly and laughing.

Several months later

Hi my name is Brett. Welcome to my only fans channel. If you got any hairy request, hit me up

Brett in Trent's body:"Well this is just pathetic. Man, I knew you'd crumble. But this just seems you lost your mind"

Trent's massive colleague came next to him:"Hey, bro. What are you looking at?"

Brett:"Just looking how one of my friends threw away their life, kinda sad. But whatever. Their life, not mine"

Friend:"Hey, wanna grab a beer later this evening?"

Brett scanned his friend from top to bottom and smiled:"Sure thing. Be there at eight"

Brett thought about switching it up a little. That body would be amazing. But then he turned around and looked at himself in the mirror. And flexed

Brett:"Nah. I'm Trent. And I'm keeping this body"

A request from messages (another one who waited for a LONG time, sorry guys) for @swappwas

Hope you like it :)

P.S. written late at night on a phone with a very irritating autocorrect, so please excuse the mistakes

[bonbonly]

pairing: charles leclerc x f!reader ; tw: rough sex, lots of degrading

sugardaddy!charles leclerc just sent you a whopping check of 5 grand. he doesn't really say much to you during the day, but during the night he always demands that you call him right before you go to bed. he wants to hear your sweet voice. if he's having a good day, he'll ask you how your day went, what exciting things you did. his french accent's sounds like honey in your ears, and his little chuckle gets you all tipsy right before you sleep. if he's having a bad day, though? prepare to spend the entire night with your fingers in your cunt, and he's on FaceTime, making sure you don't cum without his permission. he wants to see you beg for him, to have him be your sole attention. your mind should only be on him and nothing else. who gave a fuck about your class tomorrow? for fuck's sake, he's paying your tuition to even attend those classes!

on one particular day when you're leaving class, he surprisingly texts you and asks if he can drop by your university. it's been a few weeks since he's last seen you. he has some gifts for you and he's planned to take you to some fancy restaurant.

your foolish self leaves him on read because your friends offered to finally take you to this concert, their brothers were also tagging along. and who doesn't love to ogle at their friend's hot brother? so not only did you leave him on read and ignore all his plans, you also forgot to call him right before you went to bed... which was at around 5 am in the morning after your friends and you partied the whole night. you might've also gave one of the boys a very sloppy blowjob in secret, but you were drunk and having fun, it didn't matter!

when you wake up the next morning, you realize what happened and in absolute fear of incurring his wrath, you don't call or text charles at all for the entire week. you didn't want to deal with him at the moment, you cared for him a lot of course you did! but you figured he'd let it slide in a week. he likes to text you a simple "sweet dreams mon ange" right before bed no matter what mood he was in; surely he'd get over it, right?

but then, this semester's housing hasn't been paid yet. charles was always on top of his game, he'd never wait until the deadline to pay. you figure that he must've forgot, so you call him but he's sent you straight to voicemail. with a frown, you hop into your car (a porsche 718 boxster that charles generously bought for you one night) and drive over to where he lives. you haven't seen your sugar daddy for a whole month now! you skip over to his front door, knocking eagerly because you desperately wanted to know why he didn't pay your housing.

you barely have time to speak because as soon as he opens that door, he's grabbing your arm and throwing you onto a sofa in the living room.

"oh i should've known you would be running to me as soon as i didn't pay one thing, pute" he snarls, and you're frowning at him. oh you made such a big mistake ignoring him for what? a month now?

"i go out of my way to buy you that car, to buy you expensive clothes... i pay for your tuition and housing, i pay for everything and yet you don't bother to notice me? i'm done, get out of my sight!" he yells, and you're scrambling to latch onto his feet,

"wait, wait, no, please! charles!" you notice his eyebrow raise at you in a condescending manner and you gulp, "mr. leclerc, i mean. please, please, i was just worried you'd get mad the first day when I ignored your text! i didn't mean for it to get out of hand!"

charles isn't convinced one bit, he's staring at you in frustration as a hand runs over his face. he snaps his fingers, gesturing for you to get up on your feet, "i don't think i can accept your words, you've destroyed my-"

"i'll suck your cock!" you blurt out, getting on your knees immediately. and he's chuckling darkly at your words, his hand rubbing the back of his neck as his other hand cups your chin to look up at him, his thumb running across your bottom lip,

"i could spend fortunes on your education, and the only thing you'd know is to please my cock, isn't that right ma chérie?" there's still an edge in his tone, but he sighs out loud, "i don't want your mouth, no i want your pussy, get up and head to my bedroom."

and you do so because you have your own selfish reasons, to be honest. you need him to pay for housing, you didn't want to end up living on the streets!

but as he's fucking you, his pace brutal and unforgiving, he never once mentions his deal to pay. he has your hair in a tight makeshift ponytail, watching your ass bounce with each thrust as his other hand is rubbing on your clit. you're cumming for the umpteenth time, bedsheets soaked with your sweat and juice. he has no signs of stopping, no he's going to have his fill after a month of not seeing you. your ass is red from all the spanking, you can hardly lay on your back because it's so bruised! your voice is hoarse from all your screaming, but he did offer you his cum to soothe the pain in your throat!

your hands are grabbing the sheets below you, sobbing uncontrollably as he's relentless. he's saying the vilest things above you as his hand now wraps around your throat,

"you're such a slut. maybe i should stop calling you mon ange, no you are far from angel. far from it. i bet you'd spread your legs for anyone you see, hm?"

you're shaking your head, telling him that he's the only man you ever think about the only man you ever wanted!

"don't fucking lie to me, i know what you did with those boys at the concert," and now you're confused as to how he even knew about that! he's shaking his head with a laugh as he watches you glance over your shoulder to look at him, "i should punish you harder for even thinking about sinking that mouth of yours onto another man - no - boy's cock, you whore. you just can't live without someone's cock inside you, can't you?"

"here's what's going to happen, you're going to talk to your housing and talk about cancelling for the term," his thrusts become harsher, and you're silently screaming at how good he feels, "i'm not paying for housing anymore. no, you're staying with me from now on. i can't trust you anymore, you'll throw yourself onto any man you see. you'll stay with me and every night before you go to bed, you're going to take my cock like the good little slut that you are, understood?"

you nod your head, milking his cock once more as he's filling you up with ropes of his cum. he groans out loud, head dipping to see your spent body. after he cleans you up, he has you sleep with him for the night, one arm around your waist as he pulls you closer to his frame. he inhales your smell, nuzzling into your neck; he could surely get used to do this now.

[littlejuicebox]

My Sun, My Moon

Pairing: Spawn Astarion x GN!Reader/Tav Summary/Setting: 6 months post BG3 / Part 2 to my other fic Astarion talks in his sleep. Rating/Warnings: PG-13 / In game spoilers / Alludes to sexual encounters / Mentions of past trauma etc / Pretty much all fluff / It’s so sweet it’s going to rot your teeth Word Count: 2.3K Notes: This is 5/5 Days of "Star-mas!"

*takes a bow* Happy Holidays! Hope you all enjoyed!

I'm also entering this into the #BG3HolidayFluffle23 challenge under the prompt "twinkling lights."

Click here to see my master list.

-----

After Astarion’s sleep-talking gave away his little secret, you’d spent nearly every waking moment anticipating the rogue’s proposal. You were horribly, terribly wrong every time, of course. You began to think that perhaps your original assumptions were right, and that an engagement would come much later on. Maybe he wasn’t quite ready. Maybe he was just planning and thinking about the future… the frustratingly distant future. He’d ask the question when he was ready, you reasoned; in his own time and on his own terms. You could respect that.

But then, on the eve of the Netherbrain Battle’s six month anniversary, you came home to a dinner that Astarion had cooked (almost) entirely himself. Candles were lit, table settings were placed, and your lover chose an expensive wine pairing for the meal. His steak was, of course, entirely raw while yours was seasoned and cooked to perfection. You were certain you had Shadowheart to thank for your half of the meal, but you’d complimented your lover and all his efforts, nonetheless. At the end of dinner, you were quite confident that this would be the moment you’d been waiting weeks for.

“I have something to say.” Astarion murmured, lithe fingers rubbing circles on the back of your hand as he clasped it in his own.

You practically felt your soul leave your body in that moment. Oh gods, you knew what your answer would be, you knew this was coming, and yet here it was, and you were still wholly unprepared. You barely fumbled out a, “Y-yes, my love? What is it?”

“I read your mail.” Astarion responded, his eyes flooding full of guilt at the confession. He expelled a small sigh, flicking his gaze up at the ceiling and then back down to you. “Darling, I know we have been discussing this for months, but I really don’t think we should go to the Underdark. You’re getting so many outstanding offers that require you to remain in the city. You’re the hero of Baldur’s Gate, for god’s sakes. I know you want me to be safe from the sun… but I can’t, in good conscience, do that to you and rip you away from so many wonderful opportunities.”

“O-oh…” Your chest deflates and you catch yourself frowning for just a moment. Astarion’s brow furrows as he incorrectly interprets the cause of your sudden mood shift to be the current conversation and not the crushing disappointment you were trying to shove aside. You quickly try to move into a more neutral expression, but the rogue is already jumping into another worried explanation.

“Darling... Please hear me. I love you more than anything, and I know you better than anyone. You will not be truly happy there, of that much I am absolutely certain. These offers you’re receiving will give you multiple avenues to build the life you want…. the life we want. Imagine the good you could do with that level of influence, my love! Let me help you; I can review contracts, negotiate deals… whatever you need to ensure your success. Do not throw away so much potential on my account. I simply couldn’t live with myself if you did.”

He was right, of course. The only thing you wanted almost as much as you wanted Astarion was to continue the good work you two had been doing for Baldur’s Gate.

You sigh and nod your head, squeezing his hand gently. “You’re right, my love. I suppose it would be silly for both of us to throw away so much opportunity.”

Astarion beamed at your response before leaning over the table to plant a kiss on your lips. You smiled at the rogue when he pulled away to look at you with adoring crimson eyes. Perhaps it hadn’t been the conversation you were hoping for, but it had been a good and much needed one, nonetheless.

-----

Tonight, you and Astarion decided to take a stroll around the city. You were following the vampire’s lead, ambling around the streets as he pointed out more than a few of his old haunts. He revealed some of the difficult moments in his past as you two meandered about… more than one of the tales nearly made you cry with an overwhelm of sympathy for your lover. But you held back, knowing the elf hated eyes full of pity almost as much as he’d hated Cazador.

You noted that Astarion seemed to look back on his experience with more acceptance now. You knew, of course, that there were likely an infinite number of stories he had not yet revealed to you and perhaps never would. But you were still happy to see a bit of lightness in him as he spoke his truth. He hadn’t appeared to have one of his episodes on the entire walk, and as you pondered this, you also realized his night terrors had only occurred a handful of times this month. Such an improvement to what had been an almost daily incidence when you two originally moved in together.

Before long, you and your love arrived at the docks, where just over six months ago you’d felt as if you’d been stabbed in the gut as you watched the rays of sunlight scorch the vampire until he was forced to run for cover. But now, you two stood there hand in hand, resting in a pocket of comfortable silence. Both of you were admiring the twinkling starlight, full moon, and dark, mysterious expanse of the sea.

“The stars were so much more beautiful in the wilds… don’t you think, my sweet?” Astarion asks, his eyes filled with wistfulness as he ponders the sky.

You utter a little hum of agreement as your mind flashes to the first night in camp, when you caught Astarion reclined on his bedroll, stargazing. You turned your head to look at the rogue and remind him of the memory, but found he disappeared from your line of sight. Your vision wanders down and there he is, bent on one knee.

Oh this had to be the moment. Just when you were about to shout yes before the rogue even had a moment to say anything, Astarion looks up and smiles, a small pouch of gold coins in his hand. “Look! I suppose it’s our lucky day, darling. Their loss is our gain, would— are you alright, Tav? You’ve got this strange look on your face.”

Gods, not again. You feel your face flush with embarrassment. In your excitement and overwhelm, you’d almost ruined everything and let Astarion know that you knew his little secret. You made the decision then and there that this would be the last time you anticipated his proposal; let it happen when it’s meant to happen. You were done playing the guessing game. You couldn’t ruin everything with your big fat mouth.

You nod your head slightly before turning to look back at the stars once more, taking a deep breath and hoping to settle yourself.

“Yes, my love. I suppose I’m just thrilled by the beauty of the stars and the full moon, tonight. And by your beauty, of course.”

The rogue stands up, tucking the small sachet in his pocket. He smiles and places a soft, loving peck on the apple of your cheek before wrapping his arm around your waist. The two of you look up at the stars once more, and you spend a few moments pointing out some constellations in the sky. Stargazing had been one of the first things you two bonded over in camp.

Astarion is watching you with devoted interest as you ramble on about the planets and the mythological creatures represented by the patterns in the stars. Finally, there is a small lapse in conversation, and you want to take the opportunity to kiss him, but when you turn, the vampire is once again out of your sight line.

When you look down this time, Astarion is looking up at you, holding a velvet box in shaking hands.

“Tav—" He manages to choke out, but then his eyes fill with tears, and he stops to blink them away, chuckling softly at himself. You immediately come to kneel in front of your love, hands pressed to either side of his face, silently urging him to continue.

The vampire inhales shakily, suddenly quite overwhelmed by the extreme vulnerability he knows he’s about to lay before you. But the softness of your hands on his face grounds him in the moment and he smiles, admiring the look of utter adoration in your eyes.

A couple of tears fall over the edge of his lash line, and you immediately swipe them away with your shaking thumb. Another chuckle escapes the silver-haired elf, and he shakes his head in disbelief.

“My love… I’ve rehearsed this for weeks. I’ve said it all out loud more than a thousand times, I’m sure. I’ve spent almost every opportunity in your absence practicing this. One time I even had Shadowheart pretend to be you while I rehearsed my grand speech. But now that we are here… I’ve nearly forgotten everything I wanted to say.”

You move forward to press a kiss to Astarion’s lips, your hands still shaking as you run your thumb over his cheekbone. “It’s okay, my Star. Please continue, when you’re ready… rehearsed or from the heart… I want to hear it all the same.”

Astarion nods just a fraction and inhales. The shaking hand that is not holding the ring box comes to lay atop your own hand resting on his face. Your love slowly, absently runs his thumb along the back of your palm as he gathers his thoughts. He stares into your eyes with so much love that you almost kiss him again but hold yourself back to allow him to continue.

Astarion exhales a shuddering breath and then continues in a reverent tone, as if he’s whispering a prayer, “My darling. I have lived long life. Much of it was a sad and hopeless one. When we were walking through the city, I pointed out several places where I’d encountered horrible things. Many of those things are still hard to talk about… some of it, I don’t know that I will ever be able to.”

You are crying now, from the overwhelming blend of sympathy for your little Star and palpable feeling of love in this beautiful moment. Tears begin coursing thin streams down your cheeks. Astarion wipes away the tears as they fall, though his lips start trembling from your display of emotion.

“B-but what I do know is that… in many of the places I pointed out, there are also memories of us. Of our friends. Of the time we spent together before saving the city and of the six months we’ve spent here after that. Little by little, we are taking places that only held horrible memories for me and turning them into places that hold feelings of hope and happiness.

I guess what I’m saying is that… these past six months have been the counterweight to two hundred years of misery. And I do not think I deserve you, but I cannot imagine my life without you. You are everywhere I go, everywhere I look, and every happy memory I hold in my heart. If you’ll have me… I would like to spend the rest of our lives, however long they may be, turning this city into a place of hope for us and for the people we hold dear.”

Astarion opens the box, and you gasp in true awe as he reveals possibly the most beautiful ring you’ve ever seen. At the center is a beautiful moonstone, emitting an ethereal glow that shines brilliantly in the darkness of the pier. The setting is gold, and an intricate sunburst pattern made in smaller gems surrounds the center stone.

“Standing on the dock that day, after that long battle… I had the thought that my life was ruined when I realized I could no longer stand in the sun. I thought I might never know true happiness again. But it turns out, that was the moment my new life with you began… and you’ve opened the door to more happiness than I could’ve ever imagined for myself.

Even if I never see the sun again, I have made my peace. I would make the choices I made to be here with you, on this dock, in this moment, again and again in every lifetime. You are my sun and my moon. And my darling, it would be my honor to be your Star for the rest of time. Tav… will you marry me?”

As soon as the question comes out of your lover’s lips, you instantly push forward to crash into Astarion, enveloping the elf in an emotional kiss. You both topple over from the sheer force of your ardor, and as you do, the vampire deftly snaps the ring box closed to protect it from spilling out onto the dock.

When you finally break away, panting heavily, both your faces are thoroughly flushed with excitement. The vampire looks up at you, scarlet eyes filled with absolute devotion. You giggle and press one more soft kiss to the rouge before taking your hand in his and pressing a kiss to his knuckle. “Yes, Astarion. Nothing in this life would make me happier than to share it with you.”

-----

Later that evening, the two of you are naked in bed after several rounds of vigorous celebration. You’re admiring your ring, which is still faintly glowing in the semi-darkness of your bedchambers. Astarion takes your hand and presses his lips to the ring with a small smile; his scarlet eyes closely examine the gem.

“I don’t know how it works… you would have to ask Gale. But the center stone glows when I think of you, you know.”

You blink, moving to touch the gemstone in the middle of the ring with curiosity. “But it hasn’t stopped glowing since we’ve been on the docks.”

“I haven’t stopped thinking about you since we’ve been on the docks.” Astarion replies simply, moving his hand to stroke your cheek as a gentle, good-natured laugh escapes his mouth, “Perhaps now you’ll have some insight into how often my thoughts revolve around you, my sweet.”

You feel your eyes welling with tears again. Damn this man and his beautiful heart… he truly never misses a detail when it comes to you. You move forward to pull his lips into another loving kiss, and when you break away this time, a thought crosses your mind.

“Astarion… did you really find that bag of coins on the dock?”

Your lover grins mischievously, his crimson eyes crinkling at the corners as he grabs your ring-clad hand and kisses it once more.

“No, my sweet. But I had to throw you off. Shadowheart told me about my mishap. I wanted to surprise you… but you know me far too well and you’ve never been easily fooled… and the sleepy confession didn’t help things at all. I just figured that you would never anticipate that I’d drop down on one knee twice in a row.”

Astarion knew you just as well as you knew him… and he had been right. He’d fooled you. You roll your eyes and chuckle as the rogue moves closer to you, nuzzling into the side of your neck where fresh fang marks throbbed.

“Now what do you say, darling? One more round of celebration before we go to bed?”

[being-addie]

Sunday Resets

Setting aside time for yourself is so important. I don't think people understand how vital it is to pay attention to your body and just take a day to let your body r-e-l-a-x. We're all so busy fighting to reach the top, that while climbing the corporate ladder, we lose ourselves somewhere along the way. Burnout, depression, and monotony come into play when we don't listen to our bodies telling us they need a break.

Once every two weeks or so, on a Sunday, I turn off all my notifications and have a day dedicated to me. Giving my body some TLC, resting and preparing for the next week. If I have plans on a Sunday, such as brunch or a meeting, I shift that day to Saturday, or at the very least, a day where I have at least 4-5 hours to spend leisurely.

Things I like to do on my Sunday resets:

Wake up early/sleep in: Depending on my mood, and how much sleep I've had during the week, I'll either be up at the crack of dawn or still in bed till it's nearly noon. There's no shame in staying in bed till 11:30 if you're particularly exhausted, but I recommend waking up at least before 11 AM because then you'll feel tired and groggy (of course, this doesn't apply to everyone)

Clean my room: I always make my bed without fail, and if my room is messy, then I'll clean it. Clean the vanity table, my desk, closet, art cupboard and bookshelf, and then the bathroom. If my mom needs help around the house, I do that too.

Food: I make myself a good breakfast, taking time to move around the kitchen and just breathe. I'm getting to eat good food, the sun is shining and I'm alive. It's great. Sometimes my dad cooks for the whole family and we just sit and eat together.

The Everything Shower: I take my Everything Shower on Sundays, where I wash my hair, deep condition, use a hair and face mask, exfoliate and do a face massage. I don't shave because I get my waxing done in a salon. I then slather myself in cocoa butter lotion and apply lip balm. Then do my hair routine (curly hair). It takes a few hours, but it's worth it.

The Next Week: I prep for the next week by cooking something I can take to my classes, like granola bars or homemade pita chips. I also sit down and plan my schedule (any dinners, meetings, parties, etc) and make a rough plan of my goals for the week, like assignments and deadlines.

Errands: I usually make a list of things I need to do during the week, like any specific separate groceries that I use, art supplies I'm low on, or needing to top up the air in my tyres. Then I go complete all of those in the afternoon.

Walks: In the evening, I take a walk around the block with a friend. I usually am too busy to do this during the week, so getting some fresh air is always a treat.

Relax: The rest of the evening is spent relaxing. I watch Netflix with my family, chat with my younger sister, read a novel/play the piano/write poetry. We have dinner together and then either watch a movie or just spend the time talking about our week, or the news. It's fun.

Double-check: Before I go to sleep, I make sure to double-check that my work is done, my bag is packed, clothes are folded and all my devices are charged. I'm in bed by 10:30 PM.

Remember that not all Sundays will be like this. Sometimes I'm extremely drained, so I'll sleep in, order food and just lay in bed recuperating. It's okay to take a rest day. This guide is if you want to be more productive, and it helps the week go smoother. Be the person who has their life in charge. You've got this.

<3

[furiousgoldfish]

On effortless recovery (personal)

I've been slowly dealing with cptsd and osdd for the last 8 years, and while I've had to actively work on some stuff, other have just happened without my interference, or at least, without me knowing I did anything about it. I have not been to therapy; or rather, there's been several attempts that were not working, and I had to end them. For instance, I've had therapy with someone who showed next to no interest in my issues and kept minimizing and ignoring whatever I've been saying, and this was the only person who didn't try to institutionalize me.

I've had to actively work on osdd, and it's something I'm learning about, and understand more as I go, but I also get that osdd is making everything else much easier on me. For instance, lots of my memories and thoughts are being blocked from me, and contained in alters who are making sure that I'm not affected by it, that is a huge help. Lots of thoughts that would upset me if I thought about them, are completely out of my reach, and if I do try to think about them, my mind goes blank and I forgot what I was thinking about. That's a great help for issues like anxiety and spiraling; I used to drown in my own fears and worries; now I just can't remember any of it. It is slightly depressing that my own peace of mind requires that big amount of amnesia, but you know, having some peace is so nice I could never be anything less than grateful for it. Being able to maintain some semblance of peace feels like resiliency, it means I have a place of quiet where I can go back to, even when distressing things happen.

I'm having my chronic pain and chronic exhaustion ease away from me very slowly. I still get exhausted easily, and am tired way more often than a regular person, but I now rarely get days when I can't get out of bed, or have to sacrifice a whole week due to a flashback or a nightmare. I no longer get anxious about planning to do something a day or two ahead because I can count on having at least a basic amount of energy. I don't think I've done anything to create this, it was just happening over the years, on its own. It's also happening so slowly that I don't even feel the progress, I have to remember to look 3 or 5 years back and remember just how much time I've been spending in bed then, to realize that it's less now, that I can do multiple activities a day now. I know I'm extremely lucky to be recovering from this, because there are people who have a chronic condition that doesn't allow for recovery, and I am very grateful for every day I can move around.

Another thing that is much better is sleeping! I used to wake up feeling like I'm dying, overheated, stressed, anxious, sometimes even paralyzed in fear, and if not fear, then grief would hold me down and I would be too sad to move. Now I'm finding myself waking up thinking 'Oh I'm so well rested! I have the energy to tackle some chores' like I'm in an actual good mood. And it's like ??? what is going on, since when is this me. I've been dreaming of having mornings like this, and now I have them, and it just happened over time (8 years) I still only think about doing chores when I have energy, because I know it's the only time of day I'll have any energy, so if I wake up restful I will rush to do dishes, laundry, cleaning, cooking, and whatever else, because I know the energy will go away later and I will become a sad slob. But it's much better than waking up and having to take a few hours (or days) just to recover from sleeping. My sleeping schedule has been 8 hours all along, I somehow can't sleep over the 8 hour mark, and can't function if I sleep less than 7.

I will still sometimes have flashbacks and meltdowns if anything bad happens to me, but the recovery time from them has gone way down. It used to be weeks, months even, to recover from a single bad event. Now it's more like hours and days. It's still not very similar to what I think a regular person would have to deal with, but I love the progress very much! One thing that slips my mind is that I regularly forget how much worse things used to be. If I bounce back from something, I forget that in the past, this would ruin me for weeks, and I forget that this is progress and to take a minute to acknowledge that. I just take what I can and go. But it's good to look at it and see that life is a little easier.

Some anxiety has also withered away from me, because so much of my anxiety was due to inexperience. New problems that would appear in my life seemed unsolvable and catastrophic, because I never faced those problems before, didn't know how to solve it, didn't dare to ask for help, didn't have skills or knowledge to tackle any of them myself, and all of it felt like it would lead to my doom. After already having solved some of those problems multiple times, I'm at peace just because I know what to do now. I haven't done much asking for help to be honest, because I hate it, but in struggling to solve the problems myself (sometimes taking months and years to do so), I've gathered knowledge, skills and experience, and I now have a general idea of what to do in situations that reoccur, and also know what to expect, how long something will take, what type of action will resolve it. Just living and tackling things by myself, and succeeding, eases a lot of anxiety. There is a solution to everything, with sufficient knowledge, experience and skills.

A lot of stuff that's previously been bothering me to the level where I couldn't deal with it, can now be dealt with merely distracting myself from it. Which I think is very funny, because I used to consider all my time playing games or looking at funny videos 'procrastination', because I wasn't being productive right, I was just 'procrastinating' and delaying dealing with life. Now I value these activities specifically because they can save me from feeling miserable and sad. There's a warmth to looking at people being goofy, funny, interesting, entertaining, and taking joy in it, and reminding myself there's still a lot of good things in the world, there are good people, there is warmth, there is love, and I feel better after seeing it, regardless of how awful I felt before. Having my own thoughts redirected to something hopeful is making my days better, more stable. I think I'm just stopping myself from spiraling into hopelessness, by looking directly at hope and staying fixated on it for long enough. And it's something I didn't previously value as a real activity, because I didn't believe that making myself feel better while producing nothing, was a worthwhile pursuit.

Being safe from abuse for a long time managed to erode the feelings of guilt and shame I had in my own interests, thoughts and activities, and I've became unafraid of any failures. It is now very clear to me that failing is the only way towards learning and it's incredibly valuable. I'm shameless at starting new hobbies and activities and it does not bother me whatsoever when I do badly. Even failing at big stuff in my life, things that created actual damage to me, supplied me with knowledge I don't think I would otherwise gain, and I treasure it. I don't feel ashamed or like I've done anything wrong. I've been able to engage with my own curiosity about things and I'm now able to ask questions about anything, without feeling bad for 'not knowing already'.

I've also accepted that I'm bad at some stuff, and it doesn't mean anything much about me, we're all bad at something. Sometimes I'm bad at stuff, but enjoy doing them, so I still do them, fun gives it good value! And if I'm both bad at something and don't enjoy it, then I completely drop it, and feel okay knowing this just isn't for me. I remember when I used to believe I'm bad at everything, just because I was getting such horrid feedback on it, now it's almost funny. I like stuff I create even when I do them badly, because I remember how much fun I had doing it. If I want to do them better, I know I just need to keep practicing and it will happen. Nothing a human creates is shameful, especially if it's not causing any harm to anyone. We're made to create and it makes us happy.

I don't think I've done anything specific to create these changes, maybe some critical analysis of the past, and some willingness to consider my own happiness important and worthwhile. I think I spent so much time grieving that I've actually processed the most of it, so I'm no longer as overwhelmed by it as I was before. It's not like I'm no longer sad, I will start sobbing frequently and whenever I'm tired, I am automatically miserable. But it is no longer constant, suffocating feeling that follows me for every second of existence.

I haven't done anything to fix the sleeping or to ease the chronic pain, that was just time and being safe from abuse for a longer period. I wanted to write this specifically because I've been waking up feeling okay the last few days and that was a shock to experience, what a bliss to wake up and think 'I'm well rested'. Incredible life experience.

[silenced-judgement]

‧₊˚ ☾. ⋅ ⋯ 𝙿𝚊𝚝𝚛𝚘𝚗 𝚍𝚎𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚎𝚜; 𝚃𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚊𝚝𝚘𝚜

  ・．⸻⸻˖⁺‧̟⭒₊☠︎︎🦋☠︎︎₊ ˖⁺‧̟⭒⸻⸻．・

‧₊˚ ☾. ⋅ ⋯ 𝙰𝚜𝚜𝚘𝚌𝚒𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜

┊┊✧

┊✦

✧ .

Identified with Mors (Roman), and Letum (Roman)

Greek God/Personification of Non-Violent Death and mortality

Known Symbols: Inverted Torch, Sword, Theta (θ), Wreath, Wings

Plants and Trees: Poppy and Cypress

Animals: Butterflies

Stones/Crystals: Onyx, Obsidian, Black Tourmaline, Amethyst

Incense: Frankincense, Myrrh, Cypress

Colors: Black, Silver, White, Purple

Death 13 Tarot card

‧₊˚ ☾. ⋅ ⋯ 𝙴𝚙𝚒𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚝𝚜

┊┊✧

┊✦

✧ .

Paean "Healer"

Makar "Blessed one"

Leukokhrotos "White-skinned"

Acherontis "Woeful"

‧₊˚ ☾. ⋅ ⋯ 𝙵𝚊𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚢

┊┊✧

┊✦

✧ .

Son of Nyx, Night Incarnate

Grandson of Primordial Chaos

Twin Brother of Hypnos, Sleep Incarnate

Brother of The Moirai (Fates), Charon, The Keres, Nemesis

‧₊˚ ☾. ⋅ ⋯ 𝙾𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜

┊┊✧

┊✦

✧ .

Common offerings include: Red wine, olive oil, water, honey, milk, fruit, poppy seeds, black tea, dark chocolate

Other than that, play around a bit with different types of offerings and figure out what he likes, I've only offered him dark chocolate which was also torture to myself since I enjoy it as well, but thankfully he was understanding that I mean no disrespect if I ended up eating it (which I did), though now I have two bags of dark chocolate I got for Easter just sitting in my room unopened.

  ・．⸻⸻˖⁺‧̟⭒₊☠︎︎🦋☠︎︎₊ ˖⁺‧̟⭒⸻⸻．・

The rest of this will be of my own personal experiences with interacting with Thanatos, everyone has their own experiences so yours is likely not going to be the same. I will also include some things I personally associate with him.

  ・．⸻⸻˖⁺‧̟⭒₊☠︎︎🦋☠︎︎₊ ˖⁺‧̟⭒⸻⸻．・

‧₊˚ ☾. ⋅ ⋯ 𝙲𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚃𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚊𝚝𝚘𝚜

┊┊✧

┊✦

✧ .

As soon as I had reached out to Thanatos through my Tarot he answered almost immediately, however as someone who had only done a reading once and correctly translated Hestia's message to a friend who was confused on what she was trying to say I am not good with any other Tarot spread as the friend had used a custom spread that was similar in layout to a Yes/No spread. The type of spread I use is the Yes/No spread, where you lay out five (5) cards with Major Arcana and even number Minor Arcana being for "yes" and the Suits and odd numbered Minor Arcana being "no". Personally I prefer this as it's easier for me to understand with my silly little Autistic brain.

The first thing I did after connecting with him through Tarot was actually ask him how he was doing, I don't know why I chose to ask him that, but I said "yes is for if you're doing good, and no is for if you aren't" and then placed out my cards. His answer to me was "No" with a hidden message within the cards in order to explain to me that something didn't go well that day and he was upset, to which I replied with an apology for the fact he was feeling upset and then I asked him if he'd like to just hangout and sit with me the rest of the day, his answer was a yes and as soon as he answered I began crying. I'm naturally sensitive to the presences of beings that aren't exactly within our plane of existence; such as ghosts, spirits, demons, and deities, it's just with everything else besides deities I get a shortness of breath but all presences give me that same sort of tingly feeling one might get when they look down from somewhere up high or are in an elevator and it's going up/down.

From that single interaction alone I've learned that Thanatos is a rather kind individual and enjoys interacting with others. I always thought he was more of a reserved and quiet individual as one may think Death to be, and while he is rather quiet he's far from reserved. The best way to explain him is someone who wants to be around others but can easily become a bit anxious if he feels as if he's making the person uncomfortable and depending on his mood he can become rather introverted. If you feel like he's possibly becoming anxious over something the first time interacting with you, especially if you're as sensitive as I am to the presence of other beings, the best thing to do is reassure him that it's alright and he doesn't have to limit his interactions with you. I had told him near the end of the day that from now on he can come and hangout whenever he wants without me getting his attention first, but he instantly became unsure and worried that he'd overwhelm me due to my sensitivity. Thankfully he calmed down after I explained to him that I'm not overwhelmed and explained my sensitivity to him.

I've only seen him twice in some dreams, the first time he had gotten lost in it (as my dreams are chaotic and I can't control them if they choose to shift to something else) after like 10-20 minutes into the dream, but from that first appearance, he chose to appear as a mix of how he really looks like and the design of the character Thanatos from the game Hades. Turns out, after asking him about it the next day, he had chosen to appear that way just to mess with me and to be funny. Second dream I remember nothing about other than the fact he was there looking normal. Third dream he wasn't there but at the end of it he did send some butterflies in order to say hello.

Normally, Thanatos doesn't need to try and reach out to me, he's done so once through a butterfly, a few days after our dog had passed away but that was just to say hi and for no other reason. I had also drawn the Death Tarot, which was reversed but there was no hidden message. He seems content enough to come and sit with me without me knowing or to watch over me, plus most the time I'm the one suddenly getting his attention by talking to him at random and he's fully aware that due to my Autism and ADHD I wont exactly go and grab my Tarot to talk to him and is content with just listening, dealing with me being extremely random, or, something he did yesterday (28th) and yesterday night (27th) was sit directly next to me on my bed and lean in extremely close just to stare at my laptop screen. I'm unsure if he was trying to comfort me after Hecate scared the fuck out of me with a spider because I was paranoid and refused to sleep at all even after coming to an agreement that no more spiders will be sent into my bedroom with Hecate.

Based on that interaction, I feel as if Thanatos can become rather protective over people he's taken a liking to, his presence itself being rather warm, comforting, sometimes it's enough to make me feel like crying because suddenly all my anxieties, everything is just gone and I feel as if I don't have to worry about anything. Sometimes I'm unsure if I'm smelling lavender or some other floral scent, or even chamomile, which sometimes makes me think he's literally gone and gotten into my teas. I believe at times he's also gone and woken up Hypnos some nights just in order to get me to sleep. While writing this, I've felt warmth against my ear, cheek, felt peaceful, I smell a familiar scent that smells floral of some sort, so another thing is that Thanatos also seems to be rather curious once he's gotten used to someone. Although, as I don't find many people talking about their interactions with him, and based on how he told me that no one had ever really offered to let him just hangout whenever he wants with them before, I have a feeling that a lot of this is actually Thanatos feeling as if he is free to just be himself and that he's in a safe place because when I interact with him I don't see him as Death itself or as a literal Greek God/Deity, instead I treat him as if he's just like anyone else, I don't reach out to him for advice or help, I reach out to him because I genuinely enjoy interacting with him and I'm one of those few people who aren't afraid of death or dying, at least, not the concept of dying, as I would never do anything that actually puts me at a risk of death out of fear of being forgotten and also because I want to enjoy life as much as I can before it comes naturally.

I've also had a natural affinity towards death and the concept of an afterlife and Gods of Death, so to me, Death is a friend and is my friend, which I believe is why Thanatos interacts differently with me.

‧₊˚ ☾. ⋅ ⋯ 𝙿𝚎𝚛𝚜𝚘𝚗𝚊𝚕 𝚊𝚜𝚜𝚘𝚌𝚒𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜

┊┊✧

┊✦

✧ .

Blue colored butterflies, specifically the Blue Morpho (for those who play Animal Crossing, it's the Emperor Butterfly, literally just learned it's actually called a Blue Morpho. Although the Ulysses Butterfly is also called an Emperor Butterfly or the Blue Emperor and is a swallowtail butterfly)

Red Spider Lilies (Japanese flowers associated with death)

That silly "guh-dong" sound that happens when you get a "Death Approaches" area in the game Hades.

White roses

  ・．⸻⸻˖⁺‧̟⭒₊☠︎︎🦋☠︎︎₊ ˖⁺‧̟⭒⸻⸻．・

[meirimerens]

how do you cope with boring/difficult classes and assignments or general tips on how to best enjoy and perhaps even romanticize university?

i'm going to be a hundred and also recognize how #lucky i am but I don't have boring classes. there's not one class where i'm like "damn i wish i wasn't there rn". as far as difficulty goes, it's only my first year so it's now Insanely Difficult either and basically every time i have stressed like hell for an exam SO FAR AND MAY IT STAY THAT WAY GODDESS WILLING GODDESS WILLING i've actually done real well so i'm unsure how like Compelling of tips i can give but here's what i got going on for me:

taking notes by hand. my medieval art history teacher says neuroscience shows that writing stuff down by hand makes it easier to memorize stuff, i'm finding stuff that goes in that way but i'm a firm believer of If It Works. i find taking notes by hand allows for way more freedom of form than typing; you can put arrows, do little idea "maps" or "trees" that you'd be spending 5 full minutes on on computer. it also makes me feel 1) less stressed because i don't have to worry about a very expensive piece of material being stolen/running out of battery midtype 2) like a #scholar and gives me a sense of Locking In that i don't have with typing because i spend so much time on computer typing Unscholarly things. if you catch by drift

as soon as possible after a class, condensing the lecture notes in small concise sheets that i carry around in their own dedicated small folder. it's a tip from my boss (who also did an art history degree): don't retype all of your handwritten note on computer, make like. "memory items" study sheets. i like to use different highlighter colors (orange for dates, green for places, purple for Concepts, blue for Objects,... etc) so it's easier to navigate. they can look like this. if you so desire

you'll notice all my little arrows and the drawing; all those existed in my hand-written lecture notes

3) try to eat well and sleep enough. don't do as i do. i eat well but i sleep like shit and then wonder why i feel like i'm about to snap by hour 5 of class of the day.

4) hate to say it but bring a water bottle. and on long days, bring a thermos with either hot black tea or cold energy drink, something with caffeine in it. genuinely helping me not fall asleep on my desk when 3PM hits and i've been awake since 6:30. i'm lucky enough that i only truly "need" such a pick-me-up twice a week so. don't overdo it. that could make everything worse.

as far as #romanticizing the uni life, my tips:

a) your campus probably has a library: go borrow one (1) book from it. doesn't even have to be about your major, i'd say it's Even Better if it's not about your major, but related to your interests. you'll feel like you're #taking advantage of the #unilife by borrowing a book, And you will feel good when you read it.

b) have a dedicated #lockingin behavior for studying. at home for me it's 1) a bunch of playlists. you can and will and must indulge in some "romanticizing studying and reading in a snowy day (dark academia playlist)" or "studying like a scholar in the baroque period (playlist)" who cares. 2) one (1) scented candle that i only light for #lockingin time. and 3) a snack and a tea before lol don't study on an empty stomach your brain needs fuel.

c) if you can, go study in the library. you might not have the gorgeous #academia #romantic library of the people of the world, but even just putting yourself in a sea of #knowledge and surrounded by people who equally #grind gets you in the mood. + typicall less distractions because the wifi is too bad to scroll on the apps at the same time LOLLLL

d) might be obvious but Study something you love. the reasons i am not bored in class and am willing to put myself through the stress of exams and of feeling left behind and slowly losing it etc is because i fought like a little devil to be able to get back to uni, and in this branch specifically. all of this ^ will only be a bandaid on a deeper dissatisfaction if you don't like what you're studying.

be strong... we will smoke them all. onward!!!!

[octuscle]

You’re so good at transforming others so I was wondering if I could thank you by transforming you. Who do you want to become? 😊💪

I am almost 27 years old. I graduated from university almost two years ago. Since then, I have been working for an auditing company, auditing the risk management systems of banks. Not a particularly erotic job. But well paid. I travel a lot and my working hours are also less from 09:00 to 17:00. Not good conditions for getting back into shape. I used to be a competitive athlete. Open-water swimming. My shoulders and back are still quite broad… But the waist is no longer as narrow as it was in my best days. Well… The course of life, I would say…

Sunday morning. Normally I would sleep in, go somewhere for breakfast, then maybe do a bit of work. But today I feel like going for a run. At 06:00 in the morning. In the drizzle. I'm really crazy! But running clears my head. After just under an hour, I pass an outdoor gym in the city park. Yawning empty in this weather, of course. I really enjoy it! It's almost 10:00 when I get back home. Now for a hot shower. Uh, no. A cold shower! Hardens off. And then breakfast. Low-fat quark, protein powder, bananas, some fruit. Doesn't taste particularly good. But gives me the energy I need. A bit of Resident Evil 3 to relax. And around 3 p.m. I have to make my way to the stadium. Kick-off is at 5:30 p.m., and I'd like to be in my regular place in the south curve at 4 p.m. Getting in the mood with the boys. Highlight of the week!

Hehehe, that was a good brawl with the opponent's fans last night. That's a good black eye… And my lip is still a bit swollen too. Looks a bit dangerous. Despite the crisp white shirt, navy blue suit and polished black Oxfords. Even after a year on the job, I still haven't got used to getting up early on Mondays. Mondays are usually at 03:30. An hour of push-ups and a bit of weights training, as best I can at home. And then get ready, go to the airport and usually the plane takes off at 07:00 or so. And then I'm back to being the good auditor candidate. It's not as if the job isn't fun. But especially after the weekends, which are packed with hard training and fun with the lads in and around the stadium, the changeover is tough. I can only hope that none of my customers or colleagues ask me who beat me up like that at the weekend. I can't say that I'm one of the militant Ultra fans… Well, if anyone asks, I'll say that it happened during boxing training. They'll take my word for it. At the latest when I take off my jacket and people see my shirt, which looks like it's been painted onto my skin, nobody questions the boxer in me anymore.

05:30 on a Tuesday morning. An hour's run, then an hour's workout in the hotel gym, breakfast, 09:00 at the client's desk. A routine that I would never have expected a few weeks ago when I was doing my Master's degree. With your criminal record, the blatant undercut, the tattoos on your neck and the back of your hands, you'll never get a serious job, my parents complained. But damn it, I'm clever, I'm disciplined and I'm hungry for success. In the cage at MMA, in the fan curve at the stadium, at university and now at work. And fuck, when I show up at a customer's in a suit that perfectly accentuates my athletic figure, I'm surrounded by an aura of respect. Even if I'm the rookie in the project. For the first few days, my colleagues tried to persuade me to go out for dinner or a drink with them in the evening. Not in the mood! I found a club near the hotel where I can train properly in the evenings. Not the kind of wimpy workout I get at the hotel.

I'm so fed up with this fucking Master's thesis. Pumping, eating, fighting… This is what I live for! I've been working at the martial arts school since I got my bachelor's degree. On the one hand in accounting. And also as a trainer. Shit, why do I even want anything else? Would I like it better if I became an desk jockey in some office? I suspect not.

I love the moment when I open my gym in the morning. The sweat from last night is still in the air. Whoever had the last shift yesterday didn't leave anything tidy. I do my rounds and stuff forgotten socks, jockstraps and water bottles into the lost-and-found box. Okay, I wank on it again first. There's nothing like the smell of a used jockstrap that's still a little damp. I don't officially open for another hour, so I have that long to get my body ready for the day with the weights and sandbag. Let's see how full it gets. The place isn't yet self-sustaining. But with my jobs as a bouncer and my OF account, I'm more than able to keep my head above water. At least my tattoo artist doesn't have to worry about me not paying my bills. It's better that way. After all, it's his job to make sure I'm scary!

[venriliz]

10 random facts about me

got tagged by @druidberries @alientown @papermint-airplane TY <3

u literally tagged the most boring person but that's probably what half of all people think of themselves, huh? °-° i might regurgitate some of the facts i used for my introduction post in the sims of tumblr community. i wrote a lot so i'll put a cut with the facts below here. °-°

my birthday is the 4th of july and when i was a kid (prolly like 5 or 6) i saw an american parade on the news on tv. after i asked my dad why these people are celebrating he literally told me that they're celebrating my birthday °_° i believed for several years that americans celebrated my fucking birthday bc i wasn't aware of independence day existing lmfao. my dad just loved fooling me V.V he might be dead but i'm still holding that grudge lol.

i'm kinda lucky to be alive i guess? when i was a kid i was hit by a car in what we in germany call "Spielstraße" which is kinda like a street in dense neighborhoods where kids are allowed to play freely and cars aren't allowed to go faster than 7 kph/4.3 mph. i don't now how fast the driver was but it probably was something around 30 kph/18 mph. i didn't have very bad injuries but still °-° i could've died.

i was a typical horse girl as a kid (i still like horses but i'm not riding anymore because i'm a very old 20-something with knee problems lol) and i was fucking INSUFFERABLE abt it.

i don't want to have kids or get married. i'm not one of those people who hate children like i love my nieces and my nephew BUT i have a lot of mental health issues and can't possibly take care of another life if i can barely take care of myself properly, right? marriage to me is just a weird concept. i can totally respect people getting married and if i'm invited to a wedding i'm obviously attending but i personally can't really subscribe to the idea of binding myself to someone with a piece of paper and it then being such a stupid process when it doesn't work out. also... it costs too much money lol

i have kind of an affinity for finding missing pets (i also photograph every missing poster i see so i guess that helps with recognizing them?)

i was NOT good at school like i kinda sucked and i can probably blame a mixture of mental health issues, trouble at home and also being a lazy teenager that just wasn't really built for school life lol. i barely managed to get the "Mittlere Reife" (if you're german u know what i mean. i could explain what that means but explaining the german school system would take years). english, german and biology were my only good classes. i absolutely hated math like we're lifelong enemies.

speaking of germany, i am from germany or to be more specific from the most northern region nearest to the danish border and i LOVE living here. the north and baltic sea are close to me and people here are usually quite chill. the only thing i don't like that much abt living here is kind of the regional cuisine bc a lot of it is fish and i don't like eating fish T.T

i HATE going shopping (i'm an online shopper °-° EMP my beloved) and my friends just don't take me with them on shopping trips bc they know i'll kill the mood by complaining like a child and wanting to go back home lmfao

the first sims game for me was the og Sims and i almost fried my dad's old ass pc playing it. my first vivid memory of the game was noticing that here and there random houses appeard out of seemingly nowhere. the goths got a new house that didn't fit their vibe for example lol. years later my dad told me that he used to play the game when i was sleeping and just built these houses lmfao. so i guess my dad was an og simmer oO.

i remember 9/11 (yes i'm old enough don't age shame me T.T). i was in kindergarten at that time and just came home from a friends house when the towers fell. i saw it on tv and even though i was very young i understood that a lot of people were getting hurt. definitely had an impact on me as a kid.

yeah that's it. i rambled a lot but yeah °-°

tagging @landgraabbed @olli-online @living-undead @moonwoodhollow @microscotch @crazy-lazy-elder-sims @aniraklova @tiallussims @skaterboi108 @faerun-s @cristalviper @none-of-these-days @fadingforrest @acuar-io @elderwisp @lilamausmaus @simpleratattack @azeterna @butteredfrogs @mmonetsims and everybody else who reads this! HA!

[tenebraevesper]

Sonic Cyber Revolution, Entry 64: A Punk Philosophy

''Yesterday's rules are simply loose today! The best goal is to break them! If I don't keep running, there's no other meaning! It's a punk philosophy!''

– Sonic Drive by Sonic X

xXxXxXx

Touka yawned, noting the light coming through the slant window and figuring that she had probably slept in. Considering how they came late back home last night after their mission, it wasn't a surprise, but she did take note of Shadow missing. Well, he was always an early bird.

Touka got up, got changed into her usual outfit and went down to the kitchen, being met by Kisaki, who was scrolling down some news and messages on a holographic screen she generated with her AR Visor. Touka remembered how Kisaki had a free day today, allowing her a breather from all the work at the hospital. It also meant that breakfast was ready and still warm.

''Thanks! Sorry for… uh, 10:45 AM?'' Touka glanced at the clock as she grabbed a sandwich. ''I guess I really overslept.'' She then scanned the room. ''Where's Shadow?''

''I think he's outside. He has been up before me, and I woke up around 8 AM,'' Kisaki replied. Touka rose a brow.

''Did he even have breakfast?'' she asked. Kisaki shrugged.

''I did ask him, but he ignored me. He was too focused on that motorcycle he got,'' Kisaki said, giving Touka a questioning look. ''Where did you even get that?''

''Shadow found it during our mission, and considering just how shady the place we found it was, I sincerely doubt anyone is going to look for it,'' Touka replied, starting to stack up sandwiches on a plate. ''I'll see whether I'll manage to distract him from the motorcycle long enough to get him to eat something.''

''Don't be too hard on him. I remember how, when you got your hoverboard, spent days just working on it without a care for anything else,'' Kisaki said, giving Touka a sly smirk. Touka grimaced, feeling called out, and decided not to respond to this.

Instead, she walked outside, finding Shadow on the driveway, working on the motorcycle, with tools, rags and two small cans of red and black paint lying next to it. The motorcycle itself was cleaned up and any minor scratches and chipped paint were fixed meticulously, making it look brand new, with Shadow currently wiping off any specks of dust that remained. Touka whistled in awe.

''Woah, you did a great job with the motorcycle,'' she said. Shadow smirked, beaming with pride.

''Thanks. It is in a good condition, but whoever had it previously didn't care too much about any surface damage,'' he replied. ''Fortunately, it is now in better hands.''

''Right, however, I think you'll be able to even better care of your motorcycle if you eat something,'' Touka said, shoving the plate right under his nose. ''Also, did you even get any sleep last night?''

''I'm well rested, so you don't have to worry about that,'' Shadow responded in a dry tone, taking a sandwich from the plate. Technically, it was the truth, but he had figured that telling Touka that he may have slept only for a few hours and got up around 5 AM to start working on the motorcycle might unnecessarily upset her and he wasn't in mood to hear another of her lectures. Fortunately, Touka decided not to press the issue.

''You know, the motorcycle does look somewhat familiar to me…'' she trailed off, only to be hit by a realization. ''It's the Dark Rider, isn't it?''

Shadow nodded. Admittedly, while he and Touka weren't exactly good with recalling all the lore information and specific details in regards to the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise, they were far from ignorant. Touka tilted her head as she observed the motorcycle, humming in thought.

''I wonder how the Dark Rider ended up in that warehouse,'' she said, turning to Shadow, who shrugged.

''I don't know, and frankly, I don't care,'' Shadow replied. Touka crossed her arms on her back, leaning over with a smile on her lips.

''I bet you want to show it off to everyone, especially Sonic,'' she said.

''I don't believe that's necessary,'' Shadow said in a matter-of-fact tone, trying to keep a composure that showed how he was above showing off, but given how he kept smiling contently, it was clear to Touka that he did want to brag a little about his newly acquired vehicle.

''You could bring it today to the Taylor Workshop for the meeting,'' Touka told him, with Shadow giving her a questioning look.

''What meeting?'' he asked.

''I had been planning to ask everyone to meet up so we can tell them about the warehouse and how someone had been either stealing Eggman technology, or the Doctor had been supplying them with his Badniks,'' Touka explained, with Shadow's expression turning serious.

''That is something that would need to be investigated,'' he agreed.

xXx

''You see, I'm completely fine,'' Sonic said, stretching his arms and legs to show Lucas that here were no more injuries nor that he felt any pain. The teenager was observing him carefully, still a bit sceptic, noting how getting fully healed after only a day and a half was a bit too soon, and he wanted to keep Sonic in bed for a little longer. However, that became a losing battle as Sonic would constantly trying to show him that he was fine, with Lucas catching him in an attempt to sneak out of the house and go for a run. Eventually, the teenager relented, hoping that he wasn't making a mistake. Sonic, on the other hand, was excited to finally get out of the house, wanting to go for a run, only to be stopped when Lucas got a message from Touka about Team Neos meeting up to discuss something important.

''I suppose you could go for a quick run and then meet up with everyone at the workshop,'' Lucas told him. Sonic gave him a two-finger salute, grinning cheekily as he dashed out of the house, kicking up a gust of wind and leaving the door open. Lucas sighed, closing the door, and smiled, feeling a bit relieved. ''Honestly, being stuck at home really doesn't suit Sonic.''

xXx

Sonic felt exhilarated as he ran all over Neos City, finally getting out all that excess energy, allowing him to calm down a little, and rushed towards the Taylor Workshop, where all of his friends were waiting. They looked quite relieved to see him, asking him how he felt and whether he was fully healed.

''Yeah, yeah, I'm fine… I just got back from a run,'' Sonic told them in an assuring tone. ''So, what are we here for?''

''Touka was the one who called us for this meeting… which is a bit of a surprise,'' Lily said, turning towards the person in question.

''I had figured that this would be important information for everyone to know, which is why I asked whether we could meet up,'' Touka explained. Sonic looked around, noting how there was someone missing.

''Where's Shadow?'' he asked.

''He's still out in the city, but said that he'd be back for the meeting,'' Touka replied. Sonic smiled cheekily.

''Heh, so he's late to the meeting?'' Sonic muttered under his breath, already plotting to tease the dark hedgehog about being late to something. The group's attention then turned to the sound of an engine coming from outside, with Sonic being the first one out to see what was going on. What he witnessed made him drop his jaw.

Shadow was sitting on a red and black motorcycle, the engine still growling as he gave Sonic a smug, self-satisfied look. Not only as Sonic stunned by Shadow's newly acquired vehicle, but so was the rest of the team as they walked outside to see what the noise was. Before Shadow could even dismount the motorcycle, Sonic ran up to him, awestruck.

''Woah, where did you get that? May I take it for a ride?'' Sonic gave Shadow an eager grin.

''I have found it during a mission, and no,'' Shadow responded with a smile, only for his expression to turn into a frown when he added the second part. Sonic narrowed his eyes, a bit irked at the denied opportunity, but then smirked as he turned the charm up.

''Could you at least drive me around? I'd like to see your skills as a biker,'' Sonic said, still giving him a half-lidded smile as he traced with his finger lightly over the handle. He was quite amused that, despite the stern gaze, he knew that there was a battle going on in Shadow's head over whether to accept the proposal or not. ''I'd like to see how fast you can go with this.''

''It's way slower than your top speed,'' Shadow said, trying to get himself out of this conversation. Unfortunately for him, his initial attempt at showing-off in front of Sonic was quickly turned against him. One side of him wanted to maintain his aloofness, but the other side wanted to take Sonic along for the ride, certain that he would enjoy it just as much as Shadow did. Nevertheless, he wanted to keep Sonic on his toes. ''You can easily run beside me.''

''I know, but this is different,'' Sonic said, giving Shadow his best puppy-dog eyes. Shadow just stared back at him silently, only to sigh.

''Fine, you can come along,'' Shadow relented, well aware that he would've agreed regardless. Meanwhile, Sonic fist-pumped in excitement.

''Yes!''

Both then turned back to their teammates, some of which gave him curious glances; the most prominent being Amy's scrutinizing gaze. However, before anyone could say anything, Touka quickly distracted them. ''This was what I wanted to talk about. Basically, Team Dark went on a mission last night to a warehouse in Souto, and what we found, besides the Dark Rider, were Badniks.''

''Really? So, the warehouse was owned by Eggman?'' Makoto asked.

''No, it wasn't. The robots looked more like they were scrapped together from Badnik parts. It certainly didn't look like anything Eggman would own,'' Touka replied. ''I had figured that, if you guys would be interested in investigating it, I could show you where the warehouse is.''

''You said that the robots were scrapped together from Badniks parts,'' Tails rose his voice. ''Is it possible that there were also remains of the Buddy Bots?''

''Honestly, I don't really know…'' Touka trailed off, with Shadow, who walked up to them, taking over.

''I have seen some robots that looked similar to the Buddy Bots,'' he said.

''I see…'' Tails said, exchanging knowing glances with Warren. ''It sounds like the same situation the Chaotix have encountered.''

''What do you mean?'' Knuckles asked.

''To keep it short, the Chaotix were on an investigation of their own and someone had taken the scrapped parts of the Buddy Bots and Badniks, made some repairs and sold them off as weapons,'' Warren explained. ''We wanted to tell you that before, but we forgot due to the whole Neo Metal Sonic fiasco.''

''So, someone had been stealing Eggman's robots?'' Silver asked, giving the two a curious look.

''I wouldn't say they had been stealing his robots, just taking the ones we destroyed,'' Warren added. ''It is a little worrying to know that there are more of them, hidden somewhere.''

''I suppose we could tell the Chaotix about this so they can investigate who keeps hoarding Eggman tech,'' Lily said, her and Knuckles exchanging glances. Since they didn't have anything to do, they had figured that they should be the one to deliver the message.

''To be honest, I'm not surprised that they would use both Eggman and Tamago Corp. technology for their weapons,'' Warren continued, drawing everyone's attention, Lucas' in particular. ''They are both high in quality, at least in comparison to other robotics companies, while also being easy to mass produce.''

''Really?'' Lucas tilted his head. ''How similar are they?''

''Similar enough to be combined like this, even by someone who doesn't understand robotics,'' Tails explained.

''Admittedly, that shouldn't really be possible. Robotics companies typically make sure that certain parts they produce are unique to their brand so they wouldn't be so easily copied and reproduced by their competitors. It is common sense to keep your product unique enough so your clients keep buying it,'' Warren added.

''That's… interesting,'' Lucas muttered, surprised just as much as everyone else about this revelation. ''How is it possible that Dr. Eggman is able to produce robots similar to those from Tamago Corp.?''

''Maybe he somehow gained access to their technology when he took over the Buddy Bots?'' Minami suggested.

''Eh, I dunno. Would Eggy really try to steal other people's technology just to make his own robots?'' Sonic asked, folding his arms behind his head.

''Honestly, I can't see that happening. Eggman is too arrogant to just rely on someone else's technology when he has his own,'' Tails pointed out.

''Still, he did use the Buddy Bots against us back when he first attacked us,'' Makoto pointed out. ''He clearly isn't above stealing or controlling robots created by other people.''

''True, but that happened only one time,'' Silver noted. The group fell silent for a moment, contemplating what this meant, with Lucas staring ahead, lost in his thoughts. He took note of his friends staring at him, well aware that they were hoping that he would have an answer in regards to what is going on. Truth to be told, he did have an theory about what might have happened, but that theory sounded rather insane.

''Well, there is another possibility…'' Lucas started, with everyone giving him curious looks. ''What if the Tamago Corporation is connected to the Eggman Empire?''

As expected, the collective reaction was that of disbelief, with Lily voicing their opinion, ''Wait, why would you think they're connected? Sure, both make robots, and they appear to be similar, but last I checked, the Tamago Corporation existed before Eggman.''

''I know, but I was wondering, how much do we really know about the Tamago Corporation?'' Lucas asked.

''We know that the Tamago Corporation was founded by Dr. Telos Tamago, the current CEO, about five years ago,'' Warren said. ''I have read plenty of articles about the corporation, and people were shocked how fast it rose to prominence, becoming the most successful robotics company in Starpoint Area almost overnight.''

''Okay, and what do we know about Dr. Tamago?'' Lucas asked, stunning the group. Warren scratched his head, trying to remember whether he had any information on the CEO.

''I… don't really know,'' he said. Tails immediately opened the holographic screen, searching for information.

''Huh, there are several articles about him from the past five years, but there isn't anything before that,'' Tails said, with Amy glancing over his shoulder.

''I know that there are people who like to keep their information private, but even in this day and age, you'd think there would be something,'' she commented.

''You mean, it's almost like he never existed until the establishment of the Tamago Corporation?'' Silver, who joined the two to take a look at the monitor, asked. Both Tails and Amy shrugged.

''We don't really have any evidence about these two being connected, and even if they are, what would the Tamago Corporation even gain from working with the Eggman Empire…'' Touka started, only to get interrupted by Shadow.

''They'd have access to the Doctor's technology, and we know from personal experience just how resilent and advanced his robots are,'' Shadow pointed out.

''Wait, does this mean that Tamago Corporation is a sell-out then?'' Sonic asked.

''Either that, or Eggman is the sell-out here,'' Lily said, causing Sonic to snort at that thought.

''There is one more thing to consider,'' Lucas added. ''I've been actually trying to figure out where Dr. Eggman's base might be, and one of the conclusions I had was that it had to be somewhere in Neos City. So, what if the Tamago Corporation is his base?''

''But, how would that be possible? Do you want to say that Eggman is actually the owner of Tamago Corporation?'' Knuckles asked. ''Didn't you just say that this Tamago guy owns the company?''

''Yeah, that's what confuses me,'' Lucas admitted, furrowing a brow as he folded his arms across his chest. ''Dr. Eggman isn't the type to even work with anyone on equal footing, so the only thing I could think off is that Dr. Tamago is somehow subservient to him.'' He then glanced at his friends. ''But, it would make sense for Dr. Eggman to have a cover in the form of a company not associated with the Eggman Empire. Not to mention, the fact that this company is specifically called 'Egg Corporation'.''

''…and Eggman is apparently the only person in the universe whose naming scheme has an 'Egg' in his creations,'' Lily said in a dry tone, her and the rest of the group catching on the irony of this conclusion.

''So, what should we do about this?'' Makoto asked.

''I was actually planning to pay a visit to the Tamago Corporation, just to check it out,'' Lucas said. ''If you guys don't mind, I'd like to go there alone.''

''If your theory is correct, and Tamago Corporation really belongs to Eggman, you should have some back-up,'' Sonic said, but Lucas shook his head.

''The reason I'm asking for this is because there is still a chance that I was completely wrong. I could easily come up for a valid reason for visiting it on my own, but I'm not sure how I should explain a whole group of people being there,'' he explained. ''If I need help, I'll call you.'' He then glanced at Sonic, giving him an assuring smile. ''Besides, you told me that I should try taking more risks.''

''Heh…'' Sonic smiled back in response. Lucas then gave everyone a confident look.

''I'll be fine, I promise,'' he said, with the rest of the team agreeing.

''Okay, but if you do run into Eggman, tell him that someone has been stealing his robots and record his reaction,'' Minami said, grinning slyly. ''I'm sure he'll be furious when he learns that.''

xXx

'''Operation: Remaster' is moving into its final testing stages. With this, I will finally be able to break what I affectionately call 'The Sonic Cycle'. To wit: Dr. Eggman stages a bold plan to reshape the world, Sonic arrives, oftentimes with his menagerie of friends, to ruin everything, until finally the day is 'saved'. The general populace rebuilds and returns to their regular lives. No evolution. No vision. No future,'' Dr. Starline said, speaking in front of a holographic monitor as a video of Sonic defeating Dr. Eggman appeared on it. He then leaned back into his swivel chair, placing a hand on his chest as he continued proudly. ''Thankfully, I'm here. Step one of 'Operation: Remaster' will be to remove Dr. Eggman from play. He is a revolutionary, a visionary, and grooms a fine mustache. But he gets tunnel-vision when it comes to Sonic. I have studied under the master, seen his few short-comings, and perfected his technique. He'll thank me in the end, I'm sure of it.'' Starline then smirked, continuing the speech he knew by heart. ''Step two: replace the so-called 'heroes' who stand in the way of progress. The general populace relies on them far too much, although I'd add that this is mainly because of the deal Dr. Eggman made with Sonic and his friends. Nevertheless, it is fair easier to replace the existing heroes with new ones rather than change society. By controlling the 'hero-versus-villain' dynamic, I will be able to shape the world and its people with the very theatrics they've become accustomed to. It has been an arduous journey to complete all my plan, but now, at long last… They're ready!''

Starline pressed a button on the computer, showing a video of a green blur speeding through what appeared to be a training course within an AR Field featuring Badniks and other weapons, continuing his narration, ''Sonic is undeniably the hero of the world, or perhaps more accurately, the main character of this narrative, and while Dr. Eggman has a dangerous weapon in Metal Sonic, I don't believe that the robot will suffice. Sonic is more than just raw power, he's about style – attitude; something that Metal Sonic lacks. I need that indomitable spirit, that rougish charm. However, since it is a liability as much as it's a boon…''

Suddenly, the green blur smashed into one of the Badniks, uncurling as she lorded over her destroyed opponent.

''You thought you could touch me? Pathetic!''

She was an anthropomorphic tenrec, possessing mostly bright green fur with a patch of black fur on her face and eyelids and angular blue-green eyes. She had a peach muzzle with a medium-long black nose, upturned sideburns on each side of her head, peach-skinned arms, and several spiky quills that she kept in a ponytail by a black hairband with six silver studs on top of her head, leaving her quills turned forward. She also had a tiny nub tail split in two, shark teeth, and tall, vertical, flat ears on top of her head. For attire, she wore two silver earrings on each of her ears, a black shirt with torn-off sleeves, white gloves that possess visible lining with black cuffs that possess six silver studs, a silver ring on each of her index and ring fingers, and yellow, baggy pants with black stripes down the sides that were held up by a black belt with a round, silver belt buckle. Her shoes had yellow flares with double spikes that gave them a ripped appearance resembling lighting bolts while the back of the shoes was white. Two white straps could be found on the yellow section of the shoes, which also had black toes, black soles with two metal plates embedded, and silver studs on the edges.

''…Surge will replace him, and I will keep the bravado on a leash.''

Surge the Tenrec didn't even notice that another Badnik creeped up on her, turning around just in time to several water tendrils envelop the Badnik.

''As previously noted, there are 'design flaws' inherent to Sonic. Surge needs a support unit to make up for her short-comings. An analytical balance to the brashness; someone to look before she leaps.''

Surge grinned, blasting through the Badnik and destroying it. ''Cheap shot for a cheap bot!'' She then landed on her feet, turning to the person who had helped her out. ''Nice assist, kid! Don't let it go to your head!''

''Y-Yes, Ma'am. Thank you, Ma'am.''

The one responding meekly to Surge was an anthropomorphic fennec fox about the height of a child. He possessed mostly blue fur with a patch of white fur on the front of his torso that is shaped like a water drop, and a medium-long white muzzle with pointy cheek tuffs and a small black nose. He also had fuchsia eyes, teal eyelids, long bangs of fur on his head, and long triangular ears on his head with teal tips that hang down the sides of his head. Lastly, he had a long, thick tail with a teal tip. For attire, he wore the Hydro Pack, a bag that allowed him to carry the water supply for his water tendrils, white gloves that possess visible lining with black cuffs that are studded with gray studs, and yellow boots with black toes and soles, and six gray studs along the tongues of said boots.

''Thus Kitsunami was modeled after Sonic's most beneficial ally: Tails.''

Kitsunami ''Kit'' the Fennec followed Surge, but Starline then turned the video off, his mug appearing once again on the monitor as he pressed his hands together. ''Lastly, I took one more variable into account – the fact that I'm essentially repeating my past actions. Now, this might be a little troubling, as I'm seemingly acting the same way as Dr. Eggman with his own plans. But, fortunately, I have already planned ahead for every possible scenario.'' Starline then held up a manga sporting Sonic and Surge clashing on the cover. ''As depicted here, we were all characters originally created for the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise, which had its ups and downs – and it certainly improved when my character was brought into the spotlight, but that is not here nor there. The point is that I'm well aware of my fate in this story, specifically being crushed by debris after fighting Dr. Eggman with his own mecha and exhausting the Tricore, but I will take advantage of that knowledge to introduce step three to 'Operation: Remaster'.'' Starline suddenly slammed his hands on the table. ''I will not let myself perish in such humiliating circumstances!'' Starline then held up the coloured manga, tapping on it with the back of his hand. ''In fact, the writer should be ashamed for killing me off so soon. I could've contributed far more to the narrative than this, but it appears that at least my legacy has continued in the form of Surge and Kit.'' He furrowed a brow. ''Even if I don't approve of their idea of turning into heroes as of The Phantom Rider Arc, I will admit it does make sense, as they were supposed to replace Sonic and Tails as heroes and simply following their original programming.'' Starline then waved with his hand in a dismissive manner. ''Nevertheless, I will make sure that none of this malarkey happens. It won't be easy, as I will be dealing with not just Sonic and Tails, but also the extended cast of characters, but human and Irregular ARNav. But, I have faith in my plan…''

Starline suddenly heard a sudden knocking on the door, and sighed in irritation, well aware who was interrupting him. He stopped the recording and haphazardly shoved the manga into a drawer, with the door behind him opening.

''Yo, Doc, what is up with the schedule?! Why do we have more training and tests on it?!'' Surge barged in, loudly complaining. Starline sighed, pinching the bridge of his beak.

''Have you forgotten that you left Kit behind during your last exercise?'' he responded.

''I'm sorry, I had to recharge my pack,'' Kit replied meekly.

''Kit arrived here eventually. The more important one made it in record time!'' Surge protested, pointing at herself. Starline huffed, placing his hands on his hips, with Surge getting frustrated by his attitude. ''Test? Passed! Me? Awesome! Com'n, Doc, let's get on with the main mission already!''

''You've proven yourself efficient in a controlled environment. The next step is to test your skills in the field-'' Starline panicked when Surge suddenly grabbed him by his shirt, her hand charged with electricity.

''I'm really tired of you talking down to me! We go now and we go hard!'' Surge demanded furiously.

''Go to sleep.'' Starline suddenly pointed his gloved hand at Surge, her eyes glazing over as hypnotic waves hit her, overwhelming her senses and knocking her out. Kit caught her, completely shocked by what he saw.

''Wh-What did you do to her?!'' he cried out, but Starline pointed his Hypno Glove at him, causing Kit's eyes to glaze over.

''You saw nothing,'' Starline stated, watching Kit as he fell over. He then gulped, his mouth dry and his heart beating rapidly as he adjusted his collar. I suppose I can only use hypnosis on them for so long. They are indeed more susceptible to it, but at the same time, they can build up tolerance to it. I will have to work with them a little longer to make sure they won't betray me.

Surge and Kit slowly came back to their senses, both feeling dizzy and holding their heads, with Surge groaning. ''Ugh, what happened?''

Starline gave the two a look of sincere concern, masking his true feelings. ''You pushed your enhancements too far and had a brief blackout. Fortunately, it is nothing that will affect you long term.'' He then smirked. ''Now, then, shall we discuss the field test?''

Surge and Kit exchanged glances, still a bit out of it, but then nodded, with Starline getting between them and placing his arms around their shoulders and pulling them closer.

''Excellent! I also have the perfect target for both of you!''

xXx

''Huh, this is the target?'' Surge rose an eyebrow, her and Kit walking between the warehouses in Souto. Both of them were also equipped with an AR Visor for communication with Starline, Surge wearing a pair of yellow shades on the top of her head, while Kit wore blue goggles with a yellow outline on top of his head.

''According to the map we were given, it should be close,'' Kit informed her. Surge grinned, sparks of electricity flying between her hands as she punched her knuckles.

''Finally, some real action! I've been dying to scrap with someone other than those stupid robots,'' she said.

''B-But, didn't Dr. Starline say that this is a stealth mission? We need to pass it to move on to the main mission,'' Kit pointed out. Surge whipped his head towards him, furrowing a brow.

''Hey, do you see Starline anywhere here, Drippy?'' Kit shook his head. ''Exactly! He's waiting back in the base, while we're doing our thing. Since I'm now in command, I say that we'll do this mission my way. You're my support unit, so support me!''

''I-I'm sorry, Ma'am,'' Kit apologized, lowering his head. He then gave her a determined look, clenching his fists. ''I will support you with all I have.''

''Now, that's the attitude I want to see,'' Surge said, smirking in satisfaction. ''Now, com'n, and don't slow me down. I want to finish this mission in record time.''

Surge then quickly rushed towards the next building, with Kit dutifully following her. They soon reached their target destination when they saw a few Irregulars holding boxes and moving them to a hovercraft. According to Starline, who had meticulously kept track of all of Dr. Eggman's robots, someone was taking the scrapped remains from the battlefield and storing them in warehouses all across Neos City. Showing quite a lot of disdain for the culprit, Starline instructed them to enter one of the warehouses and destroy the Badniks within it so they couldn't be used by anyone else, then escape the warehouse without getting caught.

Surge was quite excited about this, and ready to make her move, but Kit suddenly pulled her back with his water tendrils. She gave the fennec an annoyed look, but he then pointed at another group sneaking between the buildings; an echidna, a bat, a crocodile, a chameleon, a bee, and a teenage human girl.

''Ugh, don't tell me that they're here to for the same reason,'' Surge grumbled, gritting her teeth.

''Starline didn't tell us anything about anyone else knowing about this warehouse,'' Kit said, feeling concerned. Surge at first didn't like that they would have competition, as she wanted to destroy whatever was in the warehouse by herself, but then smirked confidently.

''You know what, Drippy? Maybe, this isn't so bad. This makes things more difficult, but will show that platypus that we can handle any situation,'' Surge said. Kit nodded in agreement. Surge then turned her attention back to the warehouse. ''Let the show begin!''

Links:

#Previous Chapter

#Current Chapter

#Next Chapter

#Sonic Cyber Revolution (Masterlist)

[sadiegirl2021]

Writing tag game by @bonecarversbestie !

Describe your writing process from idea to posting/publishing?

I have a notes app called EasyNotes where I jot down all my ideas as I get them; bits of dialogue I think would work in a fic, interactions between characters (which always come to me just as I'm about to drift off to sleep) and very, very rough outlines of chapters.

Then, I'll word vomit onto a doc and copy in any notes I had.

Because I'm better at dialogue than describing the scene, I'll write out all of that first and then work from there to flesh it out. Like starting with the skeleton.

Once I have the first draft done, I start my editing process. I go paragraph by paragraph correcting spelling and grammar (I have a Chrome extension called LanguageTool), and then I play the whole chapter through another Chrome extension called Read Aloud. Because of my ADHD, it can be difficult to catch all my errors by reading alone, so hearing it out loud helps A LOT! Would recommend it. (Although the voices used are hilarious. Hearing your smut scene's read out by a monotone robot is slightly traumatising 😂)

Once I'm happy with a paragraph, I will add HTML coding to it - the <p> tag. In my head, it's just the easiest way to mark that a paragraph is complete. If I'm still not sure about a sentence or paragraph, I will mark it in red to rework. I also add all my <i> tags as I'm writing, so I don't forget about them later!

I realise I'm doing too much! But, I quite enjoy the editing process.

Once I get a chapter or One Shot uploaded, I try my best not to read it again so I'm not continuously making little changes.

Are you a plotter or a pantser?

I want to be a plotter SO BAD! I've got Excel sheets, multiple docs with outlines, plot points, and a solid plan. And then boom! The characters run off like a crazed toddler in the opposite direction, and all I can do is follow. So… I guess I'm a pantser!

What do you listen to when you are writing?

I have multiple Spotify playlists depending on the mood of the fic/chapter I'm writing. If I need to write emotional scenes, I'll put on some heartbreaking Emo songs from 2006! Or, if my energy drops while writing, I'll switch to 90s pop. Generally, though, I just listen to instrumental music. One of my fav playlists is this one.

What’s your drink of choice (while writing)?

Water. I am booooooring. It is sparkling, though!

Promote yourself! What’s your favourite thing you’ve written?

I think it's Hot Girl Summer. This was supposed to be a little funny, 5-10 chapter fic that wasn't serious. And it has spiralled into a multi POV, 40-chapter story with so much plot! I'm loving the process, though. And I think I will definitely have to get it bound when it's all done.

Share a fic of yours that you think is underrated/deserves more love.

I'm going to say Hot Girl Summer too. I think a lot of people aren't as interested in stories that follow both Gwynriel and Elucien (and sometimes E/riel or another pairing with their favourite characters) at the same time. I haven't seen many fics that do it, but they’re some of my favourites in the fandom, and I’m so happy to add to that list. If you're hesitant, I highly recommend giving them a try!

My favs are:

Call Me Home (by @propagandaprincess)

A Court of Vision and Bloom (by studentwriter666)

Best Laid Plans (by @trappedoutside124)

Do you have any advice for new writers?

First of all, just do it! It took me 33 years to build the confidence to try. For most of my life, I didn't think I was good enough to write, even though I had so many stories to tell. In my 20s, I probably wouldn’t have had the confidence to take the plunge. Writing opens you up to criticism (which I hate!), but I’m forever grateful that 99.9% of my readers have only ever been incredibly supportive and encouraging.

Don’t be afraid to use tools that help you. I know my limitations with ADHD, so I created a process that works for me. Everyone has a different method, and the right one is whatever works for you.

Finally, finding a community of like-minded people makes the whole process a lot more fun. I love helping others develop fic ideas or beta-reading for them, and appreciate all the support they give me. It really motivates me to keep writing.

What is a writing style/technique that others do really well that you'd like to get better at?

Flow and angst! I'm really working on improving these areas in my writing. I'm quite impatient and tend to rush through the plot rather than building up tension. I know I need to slow down and let the story breathe, but it's so hard! I just want my characters to kiss within the first 5 seconds 😂

Is there a character you were surprised you enjoyed writing as much as you did?

Eris Vanserra!

Gods, I love torturing this man! I've redeemed him so much in my fic that I'll be heartbroken if he truly turns out to be just a dickhead in the canon ACOTAR world!

Thank you for tagging me @olenvasynyt

No pressure tags: @sunshinebingo @avabrynne @thevalkyriesshadow @aldbooks @hlizr50

[undreaming-fanfiction]

Done Asking

Written for @steddieangstyaugust prompt 5 - "Please Please Please, Let Me Get What I Want" – The Smiths.

Warning: Difficult relationship with religion for Eddie

When Eddie was young, he used to pray.

He never truly believed, you see - he wanted to, but he just couldn't understand why there was so much wrong in his life, why his mom wouldn't come back home, why his dad wouldn't attend a single important thing for Eddie. Why would he keep getting beaten up and spat on when he did nothing evil, yet his rich bullies would go home every day to loving parents and a warm meal. Hard to believe there was a plan that made it all make sense. Still, Eddie tried. He thought that if he was good enough, he'd earn that too. But it was difficult. His dad didn't care at all, and Eddie was hungry. "Thou shalt not steal" is much easier to follow when your stomach is rumbling, your insides are collapsing in on themselves and instead of noticing that something is wrong, your PE teacher just yells at you for being sluggish. It appeared to young Eddie that being good was a privilege reserved for wealthy people. Or at least those who had someone to lean on.

When praying didn't work, Eddie tried bargaining. "I swear I'll be good if you get me out of this mess," he'd promise before sleep. "I won't steal ever again if dad comes home and brings something to eat. I swear."

But Al Munson never did. And so Eddie wouldn't stop stealing.

There was a period in his life when he went from bargaining to questioning. "Why are you doing this to me?" he asked when he finally had a warm bed and a good meal with Wayne, he finally felt happy, but then his heart gave a treacherous squeeze when he saw a pretty boy in a locker room. "Why did you make me this way? I'm trying so hard not to fuck up, but it's like you want me to. They say you don't make mistakes, but then what am I, huh?"

Like his prayers, even his questions went unanswered.

Years went by, the sky and ground split open and Eddie Munson found himself praying again. "I don't care if you're in the mood to listen, but if you're there, I could really use a hand right now," he muttered as he drove a bike faster than ever in his life, with a swarm of demobats on his heels. "We've already established you don't give a damn about me, that's cool, but don't let Dustin get caught up in this. If someone needs to go, let it be me."

That was the first prayer that came true for Eddie Munson.

What he never prayed for was for Steve Harrington, of all the people in bloody Hawkins, to stop the bleeding as best as he could, toss Eddie's body through the gate, and force the Hawkins Hospital to admit him. He didn't pray for Steve Harrington to cover his hospital expenses, threaten with his family's expensive lawyers to keep Eddie safe and unharmed, and then stand guard in his room despite his own wounds. He never prayed for Steve to hold his hand while Eddie was unconscious, muttering lots of nonsense, but also so many doubts, questions. The same ones that Eddie had. He never prayed for Steve Harrrington to whisper, definitely under heavy dosage of pain medication, "back in the forest, I didn't think about Nancy at all. I wondered what it would be like, to be with someone like you." Yet it all happened.

Waking up after the world almost ended, with Steve holding Eddie's hand from the neighboring chair, with Wayne napping on the way too small couch, and tons of get well letters on his bedside table, Eddie turned his eyes upwards, beyond the ceiling and the once again blue sky of Hawkins.

"So..." he whispered, "I guess I'm done asking and complaining for now. Maybe it's time for me to start thanking you instead. Just for a bit, don't get used to it."

There was silence, as always, but that was fine. This time, Eddie could fill it with the things he was thankful for.

[pleaseeeimjustagirl]

Building A Productive Routine And Being Consistent 

It is officially 2024! This is my first self-improvement post of the year<3 I want to discuss routines and creating a productive routine. Routines are super important they help you build structure in your life, boost your self-confidence, and can help you achieve all of your goals for this year!

What are your goals? 

♡ If you have not already written out your goals for the year I'm going to need you to do that whenever you have the time. Be realistic don't complicate or stress yourself out.

♡ Look at the habits that you have currently that are stopping you from achieving your goals. Be honest with yourself. For example, your goal is to read more self-help books this year but you have a habit of watching too much TV or scrolling on TikTok for hours on end.

♡ After writing down your goals and identifying your bad habits, it's time to select new habits that align with your goals. 

♡ You need a nonnegotiable habit this year. For instance, if your objective is to lose weight, you may consider meal prepping or pilates workouts three times a week as a non-negotiable. 

Time to build your routine 

♡ A planner that I use is the Structured App. This app has so many amazing features that you can use to plan your week. You can also use Google Calendar or buy digital/physical planners online.

♡ It can be helpful to take a realistic approach when trying to incorporate new habits into your daily routine. Take a look at your current schedule, including your sleep and work or school schedule, and try to fit in your new habits accordingly. This can ensure that you can realistically commit to your new habits without overwhelming your existing schedule.

♡ It's a good idea to practice a new schedule by taking a day out of the week to try it out. If you decide to wake up at 5 am instead of 7 am, test it out and see if it works for you. You might find that you get more done waking up earlier. However, if it doesn't work, don't worry. You can swap out and change your routine as much as you need until you find what works best for you.

♡ If you realize that you have too many habits and no space to fit them into your schedule, you might need to prioritize and focus on the most important ones.

You should make time for... 

♡ Sleep! I can not stress this enough you need to get a good amount of sleep daily. Sleep has so many benefits. You can read this article on sleep for more details

♡ Self-care. Incorporating self-care into your daily routine is very important. This can include taking care of your skin, grooming yourself, shaving, and other similar activities. Self-care is a nurturing act that you can do for yourself, so it's essential to prioritize taking care of yourself.

♡ Getting sunlight. Andrew Huberman is so popular right now and he recommends in the morning getting 10-15 minutes of sunlight. He says not only does this boost your mood but it will help you sleep better at night. For anyone who also deals with seasonal affective disorder, this is a tip I 100% recommend. 

♡ Moving your body. Find what works for you. Just because you see your favorite YouTuber doing a HIIT workout as soon as she wakes up doesn't mean you will like it. Find different forms of exercise and do what you enjoy you might prefer yoga over running on the treadmill or walking over pilates.

♡ Journaling. I love to journal a new form of journaling I have been doing in the morning is gratitude journaling. Starting your day by writing about the things you are grateful for in your life will boost your mood. I talked about journaling in Shifting Your Mindset From Scarcity To Abundance This is a website I use for journal prompts and this is a gratitude journal you can purchase on Amazon. 

What are you consuming daily?

You must know what content you are consuming daily. As humans we adapt the mindset and behaviors of those around us and the same is possible for the content you watch. I prefer to listen to podcasts, and I follow and watch YouTubers that relate to the woman I want to become.

How to stay consistent? 

♡ Remember you are doing this for yourself. Like I said above create routines based on your life, schedule, and goals do not try and force yourself to be like someone else.

♡ Be realistic. Do not overwork yourself and put so much on your plate to the point you become overwhelmed.

♡ Be intentional. For example, when you have a 3-hour work block coming up soon, avoid watching Netflix or any other distracting activity, you might end up putting off your work block to finish what you are watching.

♡ Don't try to be perfect. When you try a new habit for the first time you probably won't be good at it but keep going results take time.

♡ Do not compare your routine to the next girl's routine everybody is different and what might work for her might not work for you.

♡ When you have negative thoughts, counter them with a positive one. For example, instead of thinking 'Ugh, I'm tired and I have to work out', you can counter that thought with 'Working out is good and will get me closer to my dream body'.

♡ Give grace. You won't be perfect because you're human, so it's important to understand that some days won't be the same. Sometimes, you'll have to change your routine, but through it all, give yourself grace.

I hope this will help you when you're trying to build a productive routine<3 Comment any other tips you may have as well! I am open to taking requests and questions. My messages are always open for you girliesss to chat with me <3 

[phantom-of-the-501st]

Thoughts on TBB 3x5: The Return

General Summary: AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT

*stares at sheer number of bullet points in phone from this episode*

I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY THIS WEEK!!! PROPER ANALYSES MAY BE BACK!!!!!! (if I have time because I have so much to do D:)

ECHO'S IN THE THUMBNAIL!!! *cue biggest freakout I've had this season*

I genuinely let myself believe that we weren't going to see Echo this episode because I was so desperate not to get my hopes up. I though they were going to try and sort out some stuff between Cross and the other Batchers before bringing Echo into the fold but he's back!!!

The lighting is so pretty 😍

THEY TOOK CROSSHAIR TO PABU

HE'S TARGET TRAINING WITH AZI I'M GONNA CRY

The shaky hands are making me so upset 😭

But I'm glad that they're exploring something like this. It isn't just a case of Crosshair losing his spot in the Empire, it's about him being faced with something that affects his ability to be a sniper in all situations. His purpose was not the Empire, it was being a soldier, and that's what he's afraid of losing.

"IT'S ECHO!" Absolute mood and the only appropriate reaction to Echo being in an ep

THE HUUUUUGGG 😭❤️

Okay this may already be one of my new favourite eps

*replays hug 5 times before continuing with the episode*

"No hug for me?" "Depends on how good your intel is." Echo is defo still a little wary but the fact that the sass and sarcasm is strong between them is giving me life

There's been a lot of discussion about the parallels between what Echo went through and what Crosshair went though and I think that this is a perfect demonstration of the dynamic that stems from that. Echo knows what it's like to have your mind taken and to be used as a weapon against your brothers. He knows what it's like to not instantly be trusted. And because of that he has a leniency with Crosshair that the other Batcher don't. He isn't completely trusting but he's more willing to give Crosshair some grace because he understands better than the others.

"Especially without Tech" I'M RUNNING ON BARELY ANY SLEEP AND HALF A CUP OF COFFEE YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME

"I'm older than you are, little brother." The script for this episode is the greatest thing ever and I genuinely can't tell you how much the sass is giving me life rn 😆

Less than 10 minutes in and this episode is already killing me

WE'RE BACK AT THE OUTPOST 😭😭😭

CROSS IN THE ARMOUR AGAIN AAAAAAAHHHHH

Echo being the mediator in the group feels so appropriate

I adore how much focus Echo is getting this ep. They didn't bring him back and give him nothing, he's absolutely serving this episode and I am obsessed! 🤩

I'm in love with the fact that the Batch now just have a family pet

"I guess it served it's purpose." "Huh, sounds familiar." Initially this feels like a jab towards Cross but I don't think it is. That statement applies to all of the clones: they served their purpose and then they got ditched. It may have taken longer for Crosshair to accept the fact that the Empire didn't like him, but it is a statement that applies to every clone post Order 66. I think that that is what Echo is getting at: not a direct jab at Cross, but a general statement about something that Crosshair has finally come to terms with

MAYDAY'S HELMET KILL ME NOW AAAAAAHHHH

Mayday meant a lot to Cross and I think it feels particularly poignant now. He's back with his squad, but they don't all trust him. Crosshair could probably do with someone like Mayday right now, someone who trusts him enough that Crosshair doesn't feel as alone as he does.

Omega trusts him, and Wrecker is kind of there (as is Echo), but Cross still doesn't feel like he's home. He's missing one of the few friends he had.

Also, this is just evidence that Crosshair isn't the cold. heartless bastard that loads of people wanted to label him as 😌

Crosshair moving the helmets is such a simple thing, but it's so meaningful. The helmets were discarded and left in a heap, which represents the exact attitude the Empire had towards the clones. Picking them up and laying them out gives them a small amount of dignity.

It reminds me of the burial of the clones that died in the crash at the end of the clone wars. They may be in a remote location where they won't be visited, but they haven't just been left in a wreck, discarded. They were given at least an ounce of respect by their brothers and that is what Crosshair is giving to the clones at the outpost

Slight interval as I realise just how much I wrote down about this episode and just how much I have left to write 😵‍💫

Sensors down? That doesn't seem like that's going to go well

THE TOOTHPICK IS BACK!!! ❤️

"So yes, I did betray them, after they betrayed me."

This is all what it boils down to: they both feel betrayed. The thing is, both Hunter and Cross' feelings are valid, but they need to talk through why they made the decisions they did so that the other person understands. It's complicated because there isn't a good or bad side right now, they just won't listen to each other, nor will they talk things through because they don't trust the other person enough to be honest about their decisions.

"She went through what she did because you failed" OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH

I'm not angry at Cross. Don't get me wrong, it's brutal and harsh and a dick move but Crosshair is getting defensive because Hunter is being confrontational. They're both messing up here. I can guarantee that this is going to cause discourse among the Hunter stand who are going to get pissed at Cross, but you have to understand that his actions make sense. They're not good (in the same way that Hunter really needs to ease up) but it's behaviour that makes complete sense.

We know that Crosshair's way of defending himself is to be an arsehole. He puts up walls and he lashes out. And Hunter rn is mostly stewing in his own self-loathing (which is why Crosshair struck a nerve).

Hunter is likely taking his self-hatred out on Cross and trying to shift the blame so that he can tell himself that it isn't his fault. The problem is, it's making Cross defensive, so Crosshair is pushing the blame back and sticking Hunter where it hurts. They're both stuck in a toxic cycle.

Oh dear (I literally wrote down nothing else here. This was just my reaction to the giant worm)

Echo is so on it in this episode and I love it! ❤️

Oh shit bye Hunter

This season looks so pretty and the animation is gorgeous ✨

The worm reminds me of that thing from HTTYD2 👇

GROUP HUG

"And I don't even see any blood this time. That's progress" ECHO I FUCKING LOVE YOU OMG 😭

On a side note, we talked about how Echo's humour and sass kind of deteriorated after Skako Minor but it's coming back in full swing! It shows how comfortable he's become and is evidence that he's healing 🥲🫶

Echo talking to Omega actually has me crying. He's so fucking supportive!!! 😭

"There might just be hope for us yet" followed by a shot of the ice vulture flying towards the light. It's a good way of showing Cross' journey away from the darkness of the Empire and back towards a place of healing.

Okay so this episode just means like... everything to me. The humour was on point, the emotions were on point. We got some good content from every member of the Batch. ECHO CAME BACK!

I'm just so obsessed with this episode omg

AND BINGO UPDATE!

[study-core-101]

Popular Study Methods I dont like

(By Jay)

A list of study techniques that dont work for me at all. But study methods can work amazing for one person and then just complicate studying more for another. If they work for you, awesome, i'm happy about that. These are my personal experience with them, a lot of people wont relate and thats fine, people are different. But if you relate why these common/popular methods dont work for me, know you arent the only one and that there are more options. People might tell you "this method is amazing, you should do this" and there for you is shit.

Memorazing

Avoid this. When you memorize you dont learn. You cannot conect concepts because you dont understand. One thing is memorazing formulas, which is nessesary, but memorazing everything doesnt work. Understandment is way better. Yes, we need to remember and storage the information in our memory, but memorazing is different. Knowing the theory ord by word is shit if you cannot explain it in different words, conect it wit other concepts or put in practise.

Flashcards

Yep, studyblr favourite study method. Bear with me.

For me, it is a really passive way. When i make the Q&As of the flashcards, i remember the answers. I dont think. I associate the words. And then, when the test has the questions phrased different, my mind goes blank. It seem liked i learned because i remember but i wasnt actually learning.

Now you are probably thinking "use it for vocabulary". That doesnt help me either. Maybe it helps for knowing the meaning in a reading, but writing? I cant remember the spelling. For learning to spell a word i need to write it down. Use it in a sentence. Reading it over and over doesnt do anything.

All-nighters

Oh god, there is nothing worse than an all-nighter. One all-nighter will ruin your sleep schedule for weeks and tired=learn less. Plus, too much all-nighters lead to burn out.

With better time management, all-nighters wouldnt probably exist, or at least, be reduced by a lot

Also, as someone with chronic migraines, an all-nighter'd only give me a week straight with only terrible pain and i prefer failing a subject than that (i'd had to learn the hard way that lesson. always prioritaze your health)

Pomodoro

It's a little bit hypocrital of me to put it here, as I usually reccomend it to others. But personally? It just de-motivaties and stresses me. (disclaimer: it is a good technique, thats why i recomend it even if it doesnt work for me).

I'll explain why. The only way i can do a lot of productive stuff together (or just a long assignment) is to "get in the mood" or have like a "streak". I usually have to power through the first 5-10 minutes of studying and then i get super motivated and do a lot until my brain asks for a break. When the timer rings, it breaks it and i have to repeat the rutine again. It wouldnt be so bad if it wasnt that i work 3 or 4 times faster when i motivated than when i am powering through.

Also, having the self-impose deadline of a pomodoro (i know it isnt technically a deadline, but for some unknown reason, my brain processes it as one) makes me nervous and gives me anxiety. Just knowing the timer is going to go off anytime un-focus me. It's unnesesary stress.