#I'm blurry right now
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you askin how i got your address? bro dont worry about it bro i saw it in the 3rd dimension
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can i have me body back
#hopped on this trend cuz it looked like a lot of fun#it was btw#i like the design it's super simple but somehting about it makes me go “:)”#i was also devastated to find that by the time i made my mind#the book of bill was sold out everywhere#i'm living of a blurry pdf right now#send help#my art#fanart#gravity falls#the book of bill#bill cipher#cipher sona#gravity falls fandom#gravity falls bill#gravity falls fanart#billsona
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Louis, who pretended to be dormant for 4 months to know who to get out of our lives (he's a bond breaker) ...
plural culture is what is this guy doing here I swear he was dormant
— just-some-sillies (kats)
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#did#did system#Were clowned by Louis#HOW DID HE EVEN DO THAT#YOU WERE PLAYING HIDE AND SEEK OR WHAT#I'm blurry right now#idk who i'am
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#fe fates#camilla#so i actually drew this a while ago but was gonna shade it and do more emoji things#but welp uh hmmmm im sick and apparently look like I'm dying#which isnt a problem until i sit down to draw and my vision is blurry and yeah thats a problem#so i just attempted to do a doodle and then failed and opted to apply a tiny but of shading to this and give up#but yup uh after a nice of body aches and misery and trying to sleep and failing#i crashed from 10am to 5pm thinking id just rest a lil bit#before anyone says oh you could have taken a day off you know - i technically can yes youre right#however my brain uses art as a coping mech and i need that coping mech really bad right now#which is why i stopped trying to draw something new for today and just went back to a past thing#im not overdoing it i promise#even if my mom and sister think i look like death walking around
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can't stop watching that video with the new angle and the way ja'marr lets out a breath after letting go of joe and kind of tilts his head looking at joe saying long way in such a fond thoughtful tone.
#and i of course am projecting here because it's such a blurry video but his expression is just!!!#so fond reminiscent contented IN LOVE#is he seeing the QB with a huge chip on his shoulder (and a crazy mullet) escaping OSU that he met for the first time#when he was only 18 and young and excitable and just wanted to be a star#and reflecting on whree they are now#and how far they've come#it IS a long way#they've made it! together!!#and what greater evidence of that is there than joe basically throwing himself in his arms#ignoring the old pinky shake#grinning and laughing together out of pure joy and relief#because you did it!! and it isn't the end! it's just the beginning!!! again!#to round out over a decade together AT LEAST#just the mix of memories of everything you've already done and the excitement/anticipation#of what you CAN still accomplish!#all represented right there in that goofy tall blonde guy who just hugged you and didn't want to let go#(and you didn't either. and you're glad he ignored your extended hand for a hug instead)#and yes i'm taking all of that from the last second of that video what of it!!!#joe'marr#god sorry for my sappy yapping this week i'll move on one day#(probably i will not but i'll at least shut up about it at some point)
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9x03 | Warning Signs
#here comes Papa Bear 🐻💖#Rick Grimes#*#rg#S9#hello my gorgeous old man#me as a tomato#H A N D S#still want to rub his fuzzy head like its a crystal ball and im some cheap ass fortune teller at a county fair#HIS PROFILE#excuse me but the nose™#SANTA FACE#also his arm hair but i'm not gonna be that weird right now#why is fuzzy daddy blurry that's a crime#there's that urge to rub up against something like a cat again
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Sometimes system culture is realizing a little "quirk" you have is actually another alter.
(Not saying you can't have "quirks" or that they are all alters. But there have been a few times where something I would do I'd often be like, "Honestly, no clue why I do that. I just do." Only to realize it was another alter's influence.)
#hope this makes sense and is coherent cuz I'm a bit sick right now so my brain is a bit tired#also nothing like doing something without knowing why and for the longest time just going “geuss this is something i do”#and being kinda creeped out cuz it just kinda happens and I kinda do it with no clue why#did#dissasociative identity disorder#partial dissociative identity disorder#pdid#did blog#did stuff#did system#osdd#did osdd#osdd system#pdid system#pdid community#system#system stuff#traumagenic system#ahh geez why do I keep letting myself post things to tumblr when I'm too tired/blurry to make any sense#anyways#have a great night
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filled with rage and hate but not much else
#right now at least#idk#blurry and shit#I think I'm maybe processing things I'm not supposed to but I don't know what#honestly nothing feels real to me right now#I just keep pressing buttons
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Sketchy art of Vio (@mountainashfae) and clingy menace Balthazar: some new, some old (last June old). I'm actually really surprised that the older one, which was something of a sequel to one of these, never made it here.

#I tragically cannot take a less blurry picture of the first one because that is from right before I messed up the colors in my sketchbook#vio miette#balthazar lucienne#emi art#match made in hell#digging out the posts that were scheduled for later this week since I'm here right now#haven't finished formatting the first art fight compilation or I'd post it. later this week I'm sure
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Finally finished this 😭
#käärijä#jere pöyhönen#käärijä fanart#my art#drawing#i was supposed to finish this on the euro tour week#but i got the fucking covid and felt really dreadful for days 🙃#now i feel i've mostly recovered#though i'm still occasionally coughing my lungs out like a sickly victorian maiden#and pls ignore the lower right corner#it was blurry in the ref and i didn't know what to do with it lol
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Sometimes I see a meme that somebody made and I know they used one of my caps to make it—which is totally fine btw and exactly what they're there for!—but it's in such terrible quality, clarity-wise, that I'm always squinting at it and trying to figure out what the hell went wrong along the way. That's not my beautiful sharpened cap. What happened to you, darling?
#like i am not fooling myself and it's a cap they took themselves like i will match it with the cap i'm thinking of on my blog#and everything is exactly right so i KNOW it's mine because the likelihood of us taking the exact same cap at that exact second is slim#but somewhere down the line this poor cap became a mess and it is too late to rescue them now#this post is meant to be playful btw pls don't think i'm trying to be an asshat#copying and downloading and all sorts of things can cause a blurry mess and i am fully aware of it#my ramblings
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just got home from my first day at orange fast food chain, oh to be a rich fictional man's sugar baby right now....
#i was supposed to work from 3-11 right?#no one came in at 11 for overnight#i stay an extra hour#dad is made i'm generous#come home and can't even shower because my 11 y/o brother is taking a shit at midnight#so here i am venting on tumblr dot com#host posting#i think idk#i'm so fucking blurry i don't even care right now
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I can't sleep again.
#100% секретный дневник левы НЕ ЧИТАЙ#лёва паспрабуе АДК#it's not about that. i'm just tired.#(stayed up too late for the first time in a while)#well... it compounded the issues.#i look like some guy with my blurry vision and yet its not enough and i dont know WHY#i do know why. have you ever not been seen?#flipped the coin from independence within my grasp to nothing is ever going to get me out of here#not even 'getting out of there' got me out#i can't wait for guard season again but i'm worried it's only going to put me right back into the depression mines#... seasonal depression notwithstanding#i need to make a choice at auditions and its whether i will be out; as me - and hopefully have a better season because of it#or just... stay like this. forever.#... my consult is right before second auditions pretty much. schedule that month is looking full..#anyways its not fair of me to expect anyone to check in on me#especially when one of my housemates seems to ... Also be going through it#and i can tell you now which of us is actually likely to talk about it and its NOT me#i'm not built for this idk. i never should have taken her up on that job offer.#...... i'm thinking about relapsing again. more seriously considering it.#i KNOW it's not good i KNOW it won't help but i dont know what fucking else will!!!!#remember when it felt like i was getting hobbies again?? so much for that..#.. i need to pull life into my *own* control but i need help to get there#and i can't even imagine being fully independent#... even if i'm taking all the right steps to get there#the MOST annoying revelation was that i could Maybe Actually benefit from therapy and the second most was that if i tell her this there is#almost no way any therapist she finds will be queer friendly#going to dig myself out of it. as always. mostly just not pushing myself right now but GOD does it suck.
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...
#glasses broke#tried to call the glasses store#glasses store phone number transferred me to a general customer service line#customer service line tried to call the glasses store no one answered#i'm about to have to pay this fucking store like $600 i really don't have for glasses#and i can't even get an actual human being on the phone in the actual location i'm going to be purchasing from goddamn#ignore me#i am annoyed#and also i can't see shit#i am getting by on electrical tape and a prayer i can't keep this up#i just want to know if they have the same frames so i can at least transfer the lenses for now#because the tape is not holding it well enough so they're not sitting right on my face and everything is blurry#i've had a headache for two days straight 😭#personal
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.. why does 16personalities have a premium
#hello i'm just working on my.. um.. a proper intro maybe?#and the original template mentions mbti so i went to look up some stuff and..#w-why would a mbti website need a premium..#also lina my apologies even though i'm that headmate who doesn't have any school-related trauma.. i'm still kind of dumb#it took me three minutes to remember how the word disassociation is spelled.#I'VE FIGURED OUT HOW TO TYPE IT RIGHT NOW ONLY THANKS TO AUTOCORRECT.#also i'm still using an image resizer for the replycons lina made and they're blurry but.. i kinda like it?#[❄️ winter speaks]#will tumblr ever remember our tags. probably not.#we don't want to create separate blogs okay.
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why would someone think in-system relationships cant replace outer ones... unless they believed that in-system relationships are inherently lesser than "real" out-system relationships 🤔 it just sounds like pluralphobia /nay
eh, i don't know why someone would think that. it doesn't seem like a common opinion amongst plurals, thankfully. (or at least it's not an opinion that's discussed on a wider scale.)
all i could speculate is that maybe they think that it'll be too isolating or not fulfilling enough for someone to replace outer relationships with inner ones. maybe they even have the idea that inner relationships are unhealthy.
...all of which are relative to the system and its individual members. simply, just because one finds that something isn't for them, doesn't mean that something isn't for everyone else.
or, perhaps:
the belief that inner relationships can't replace outer ones can possibly be chalked up to pluralphobia, as you'd said. but i feel like it may be a bit more complicated than that? i just don't have a lot to go off on since this particular aspect of having in-sys relationships isn't really talked about that much.
#i privated the post that this ask is responding to. i may or may not change that later.#right now; i'm just a bit worried that it'll start up unnecessary drama.#or that we've said something wrong; and cannot figure out what it could possibly be.#the only reason why i'm publicly answering the ask is so that i can re-read it again and make sure that our answer has some sense to it.#~too blurry to have conception of identity
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You ever come across pictures of yourself when you were younger and think 'holy shit I really looked like that'

The glow up is obvious but also oh my god I looked absolutely infantile at 22. What a fuckin geek.
#the eyebrows are so grim#so was my hair lmao hence why i keep it short#also i'm ~15lbs heavier now than i was back in 2016#but let this be a testament to the fact that your face does in fact continue to thin out throughout adulthood#bc look at how prominent my dimple was :')#it's still very visible but the pic on the right was taken in low light#so my camera's doing that weird shit iphones do where in low light it like.. makes things soft and kinda blurry?#my face
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