#I'm actually sick of them
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their love story hurts me so bad. if someone asks me "damn, who hurts you?" it's them. they hurt me. they are so "loving you is a losing game" coded. the way no matter what path she took, she will always be on the path that is against him. and lovers who HAD to be on the opposite side in any kind of event could actually kill me on the spot. I'm not even attempting to joke around rn. the way their nature is opposed to each other but they were still drawn by each other. LIKE HE KNEW WHO SHE WAS AND STILL PATIENTLY WAITING FOR HER TO COME CLEAN WITH IT HERSELF. HE DIDN'T FORCE HER LIKE HE DID WITH OTHERS. AND THE WAY THEY'RE NOT EVEN ENEMIES, THEIR NATURE FORCED THEM TO BE ONE. SOMEONE TAKE THEM AWAY FROM ME, I CAN'T BREATH WHEN I'M READING THEIR SCENES. I JUST CAN'T
#romance club#interactive game#romance club game#rc song of the crimson nile#rc sotcn#rc amen#rc evthys#i actually hate them#for making my miserable life ten times more miserable#atp i don't have the strength to read anything about them anymore#i have lost the purpose to live#what's the point if I can't see a happy ending for them#i swear on the final chapter of sotcn I'm gonna genuinely cry at their ending#they're all i can think about nowadays honestly#I'm actually sick of them#I'm THIS 🤏🏽 close to take a bath with my toaster#wanna test the theory if it's true or not#normalizing by blaming all of my life problems to hataroth
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learning to love
#they make me so fucking unwell i feel so ill whenever i think about them#it's OVER for me i'm done#teen skk is going on my fucking suicide note thanks for everything asagiri#something something your bloodied hand in mind something something by you i am forever undone#something something to the world we may be villains but to each other we're two halves of the same soul#head in my fucking hands#sry for getting all emo i rewatched pmmm yesterday and i've been feeling existential about everything#i actually listened to the pmmm ost while drawing it saved me i love you yuki kajiura😍 (i died)#nothing like a haunting latin chorus echoing through my empty head while i draw tragic yaoi 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰#big shoutout to sis puella magica i had that one on loop for like two hours‼️#anyway enough about the doomed yuri anime back to skk#forget everything i said i actually hope they explode i'm sick of their asses#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#bsd#chuuya nakahara#nakahara chuuya#osamu dazai#dazai osamu#soukoku#skk#posting at ungodly hours again this is gonna catch up to me 💔#lotus draws
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do able-bodied people not understand that if disabled people call out of work every time they don't feel good that we would call out of work every fucking day?
like honestly. what do you think being disabled means?
#if one more person tells me to take a sick day i'm going to throw something at them#i just honestly cannot anymore#disabilties#disabled#actually disabled#epilepsy#ehlers danlos syndrome#physical disability#neurological disability#actually epileptic#zebra#chronically ill#chronic illness#spoonie#chronic fatigue#chronic pain#c punk#crip punk#cripple punk#fuck capitalism#anti work#disability culture#1k#5k#10k
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It's the heat haze day
#kagerou project#kagepro#vocaloid#ayano tateyama#mekakucity actors#shintaro kisaragi#azami#actually i drew everyone... yes EVERYONE... but i'm too lazy to tag all of them... find them yourself#this is a scheduled post since my last kagepro entry was like... 2016? 2017?#I usually got sick in august so i prepared this long beforehand#maybe the last kagepro entry in my life... who knows#artists on tumblr#art#animation#gif
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star wars is going to cannibalize itself and die by continuing to chase a nostalgia-obsessed audience that will never be satisfied and deep down hates anything new for not being the originals.
#i'm sorry to unleash my star wars manifesto on this monday but i'm actually so sick of them#forever catering to the most vile and racist people in their audience#i actually really did expect this from them#creatively bankrupt pandering losers#star wars#the acolyte
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On average, what is the total MONTHLY amount that you spend on dining out*?
*(This doesn't only count going out to restaurants, but also stuff like picking up fast food to bring home, getting a coffee on the way to work, getting a premade sandwich from a grocery store deli during lunch, buying a quick snack from a convenience store or food cart whilst walking somewhere, ordering a pizza or any other food to be delivered to your home, etc.)
*(If you often dine out in groups/as a household: calculate and divide the costs so that you get a Per Person average. This is for YOU individually, NOT the total household/group costs)
(I'm sure polls similar to this have been made before (very common topic), I just haven't personally seen one that I can remember, so, I was curious to do my own! I was discussing this with a group of people today and it was very interesting to see how widely the number varied between individuals. :0c )
(Reblog for bigger sample size if you can, and feel free to explain your answer in tags if there's anything extra to add!)
#polls#tumblr polls#I'm mostly in the 0/1 - 25$ category. Maybe the rare month is a bit over $25 if there's something specific going on like birthday.#Which I'm NEVER eating in an actual restaurant (erm... covid... plus I just hate restaurant environments. i would rather pickup#the food and bring it home to a peaceful quiet environment that I control lol). But more typically like stopping by a grocery store deli#section or something. I don't have coffee that much. And I can't eat fast food much due to my health issues/diet restriction stuff#so if I'm out like coming back from an appointment and I start feeling really sick and weak. I know that a hamburger will just#blow up my system and cause nausea or something. So I try to pick the breadiest most#neutral looking turkey sandwich at the safeway deli to eat during the hour ride home or whatever lol#I actually kind of wish I could do stuff like get food more often vecause it would take the burden of cooking everything off of me#but.. alas... Money... and Health Things... T o T#I still wouldn't do it ALL the time but like... once a week instead of once a month or something.. or maybe turning into a coffee#person.. I do love drinks A LOT .. i am a drink person who will have 5 different drinks sipping on at all times#But i just have to make them all myself mostly lol#And I cant really have too much coffee since it will make me sick. so like.. teas and juice mostly#When I inevitably become a millionaire by never using social media never networking and only finishing one#sculpture every 5 months which I dont even post about or sell - then I shall... get more drinks..#I will somehow wean my body onto coffee and drink one a day solely for the ritual of it#Though even then... I would still probably just like.. buy the mateirals to make it at home or something#Like if you had a million dollars you could just buy a kitchen grade ice cream machine and other stuff to make your own milkshakes and#coffees and smoothies and bubble teas. Genuinely I think even if I were a BILLIONAIRE I would still look at playing likr $8 for a single#coffee and go .. uh.... I could just buy the equipment to make this and then save that money. PLUS. its in my house now so no need to#have to leave. I can make my own drinks in the comfort of home. .. ideal..#Like no matter how rich I ever got I would still have the lingering scroogey stinginess. like i am NOT paying for that. I will jus#make it myself. Especially if it was an Everyday thing. Anythign thats part of my routine I try to optimize and make as efficient as#possible... ANYWAY.. In an IDEAL world I would get treats. but probably not that much. as on a daily basis it would start to get#to me and I would just save up to buy kitchen machinery if I was rich lol
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Man, it's cool and all if you see a metaphor for marginalisation in the monstrous, and if you want the power fantasy of 'what if you could just eat anybody who threatened you/pissed you off'. Me too.
However, as soon as you start saying 'no, these monsters are a 1:1 on Specific Marginalised Group, and you have to treat them in the fiction like they are directly representative of real human members of the marginalised group', BUT you also, in the fiction, make them hurt/kill/eat humans? And then try to shame me, your audience, for noticing or engaging with the bit where they kill people, because you made them directly representative of a real-world marginalised group? You have lost me, and also, I think, the plot.
#hear yourself. for the love of whatever you cherish.#'but they only kill bigots so ACTUALLY they're the GOOD GUYS -' your metaphor of monstrosity is entirely premised on the question of#'what if what you went around righteously killing; believing your actions to be justified;#were actually people and it was not in fact righteous or justified to just kill them'#'what if the world isn't neatly split into 'good guys' and 'bad guys'#who gets to decide who or what is 'bad'? because that's the original problem of monstrosity-as-metaphor-for-marginalisation#(if as a creator you say 'oh my intention with this was X' cool!#if instead you go with something like. well.#'well in this setting monsters are so rare it doesn't matter that they kill people and you'd have to be a homicidal sadistic psychopath >#< to hunt them; but sure I guess if you want to play a Bad Person' well I might have#but if you're going to explicitly judge me for wanting to engage with the moral question of 'how justified is this and who would do it#versus how justified are these monsters if they do have to harm or kill people to continue to exist'#then maybe I just don't want to play your game at all)#anyway I'm sick to death of poor uwu cozy vampires who are SO marginalised so I'm not Allowed to care about all the people they murder#it being fucked up is what's fun about it! do all the other shit but let me take the murders seriously!#and inb4 someone accuses me of being a bigot for saying 'actually I don't think you get a free pass to kill and eat people if you're gay'#remember when the CW's famously reactionary and conservative Supernatural tried to just gloss over the part where every time its heroes >#< killed a demon with a magic knife it also killed the person the demon was possessing#and say 'oh no it's fine we don't care about those killings; they don't matter; don't bother caring about them either'#but they were doing it to glorify exactly the kind of people that these 'monster as metaphor' stories are trying to cast as expendable?#I have other examples that are like. real dramas. but That Paranormal Show is the one that's in the same niche that I'm talking about here#it feels more insidious when it comes through a fantasy show where there are monsters involved#so you can say 'no it's not real so it doesn't matter'#but then ALL of it is equally not real. and vampires are not actually an oppressed group. because they don't exist.#you can say 'these vampires are a metaphor for an oppressed group so this fiction matters in real life'#or you can say 'don't care about the murders because they weren't actually real'#but you can't say both and then get mad at ME for treating the murders as seriously as the vampires#let me engage with your premise and don't waste my fucking time#or just set your fluff in the Sesame Street universe where vampires drink cherry Kool-Aid and help kids learn to count
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Love confess-...oh!
Kind of a "sequel" to this, but it's really just about that one scene in fifteen.
#bungou stray dogs#bsd#bungo stray dogs#soukoku#skk#bsd chuuya#bsd dazai#fanart#teen skk#reference y'know#but not actual teens#i really went “imma do a whole COMIC about this silly attempt n°2”#i missed doing some proper comics anyway#it's great#what is also funny (or scary) is that i drew them so much i don't need to look at refs or do a sketch anymore#there must be something to worry about there... uh...#“it's just a phase!” no it's not it's already been whole months and i'm still as sick about them#damn look at all this rambling
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"Hey, we found you."
"I guess you did!"
#ffvii rebirth#ffvii remake#ffvii rebirth spoilers#tifa lockhart#aerith gainsborough#aerti#aerith x tifa#briana white#britt baron#ffviiedit#ffviiremakeedit#tifalockhartedit#aerithgainsboroughedit#aertiedit#oh i feel SICK#i'm seriously ill i think#the closest scene we got to them actually SAYING this was aerith being like ''i'm glad you guys are all alright''#i wish i could've kept in how long it actually took for tifa to bring her hand out to touch her#tw: death#tw: grief#tw: loss#it's the fact that the first thing tifa does when she arrives at aerith's side in the first scene is touch aerith...#and in the second one she struggles to even bring herself to...#give the ''aerith will never smile or laugh'' speech to tifa in the next part pls i BEG you /hj#her tearfully saying ''aerith!'' broke me even more after barret's ''I'LL KILL YOU!''#i know that speech is integral to cloud's character so may be don't do that
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Mlp au redesigns and stuff (heights aren't accurate btw).
#I've been sick all week#cookie run kingdom#cookie run#my little cookies#mlp au#cookie run au#dark cacao cookie#hollyberry cookie#white lily cookie#pure vanilla cookie#golden cheese cookie#🌌🖌️#I gave up on Hollyberry I'm sorry#i drew them all on separate canvases and just merged them into one#pure vanilla isn't actually that tiny#it'd be funny if he was tho lmao
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brush test slash rendering practice with ayem
#morrowind#almalexia#the elder scrolls#tes#tes fanart#art#id in alt#ok that's all the tags this needs ANYWAY#i started this 1. for experimenting with coloring from dark to light#2. because i wanted to draw someone kind of back turned to the camera#3. rendering practice for hair particularly#4. to go from sketch to rendering rather than doing lines to see if that doesn't smooth out my workflow a bit#5. because i've never actually used this brush past flat coloring#and out of those 1. i don't think i had enough of an idea of the palette or process to jump into dark to light painting so i did scrap that#and go with my usual “flat color with one of the mid shadow tones add shadows add light”#i do think that painting from shadows out is a thing people do digitally i just think this wasn't the drawing to test it on for me#i think i'd need to look at some other peoples processes and start with a more fleshed out idea of where to go#2 and 3 i think worked out. i'm gradually figuring hair out which i think is sick#4 i also think worked out for me which is also sick because i do get caught on lines a lot. they're fun sometimes but i think some drawings#benefit better from not having them and that it might be a bit faster#and of course everything i do is so that i can draw slightly faster and better for next artfight#as for 5. i have mixed feelings on this brush but that might be because i hate change. and also because i started this drawing on the 15th#of november and finished it yesterday. so im kind of just sick of working on and looking at it#it was a valuable learning experience and i think it came out well! i am also going to drop to my knees and rejoice when i can finally#close this file out and free medibang paint from under it so i can work on Literally Anything Else#thank you almalexia for being my test subject i should've used a reference for your armor when i did the sketch but i didn't#maybe the crown looks weird because of it maybe it doesn't. not my problem anymore i can draw other elves again#my art#iiii think i forgot a my art tag last time
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Anyone else think Ed and Ling should've been a little more. I dunno. Drenched in blood during this arc? :)c (for the sake of the blood showing up on their dark clothing let's just say there's So Much Of It)
I didn't draw this for October 3rd btw, but now's as good a day to post as any!
Bonus, by the time they emerge:
dramatic reveal ruined, more at 11
#fullmetal alchemist#fullmetal alchemist brotherhood#fma#fmab#edward elric#ling yao#alphonse elric#i looove drawing blood personally it's just really fun idk#shrimp art#comic#as it were#actually started this months ago but there were a few details i needed to fix before posting#but i procrastinated on them and. forgot. this piece existed for a while lol#i would have added al hugging ed and getting a vaguely ed-shaped bloodprint all over his armor#but i'm kinda sick and i don't feel like drawing him#sorry al you're just very complex#cw blood
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I really want to draw Subnautica stuff, especially so that I can actually continue my Newmann AU, but gosh darn it's hard to draw environments :,)
#i've been thinking about the au so mucj#but i'm steugfling so hard to actually draw stuff for it#bc i feel like a subnautica au necessitates some sick backgrounds and stuff#newmann#oh yeah btw that's them in the drawing#newton geiszler#hermann gottlieb#subnautica#subnautica fanart#fanart#digital art#my art#eeriedragone art
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about to start harrow the ninth but first i had to hold the cover up to my cover of gideon the ninth and repeatedly smush them together while making kissy noises. cannot emphasize enough how i am not hyperbolizing
#actually first i held them side-by-side and made a noise like a very dejected dog#THEN i made them kiss#they're literally— in the same fucking stance#the way the hilt of the longsword over harrow's left shoulder mirrors the bone over gideon's left shoulder oh i'm sick#tlt#gtn#htn#griddlehark
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i was just drawing abigail smoking, don't know what happened
#i do know what happened#i'm sick in the head about them that's what#they make me feel so many things i cannot put it into words#just imagine me barking all the time#i keep doing silly sketches instead of working on the actual detailed and super cool piece im working on im so sorry#sadigail#sadie adler#abigail roberts#abigail marston#rdr2#rdr2 fanart#red dead redemption 2#red dead redemption 2 fanart#evgarart#my art#gunslinger abigail
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vetvimes is truly the ship of all time. cause. like. what are they? enemies to lovers? friends to lovers? collegues to lovers? boss and subordinate to lovers? all of them and neither???
they know each other like no one in Anhk-Morpork. they have their own language. they hate each other. they love winding up each other. they have mutual respect for each other. they acknowledge that the other is the best possible option for the position he has, but if that changes and he abuses his power, the other will kill inhume him with a smile. and that makes the system work.
they are divorced. they are married. they form polycule with Sybila. they are plagued with feelings that confuse them. gay sex isn't going to solve their tension. actually, it's going to make things worse. i think they should try anyway.
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