#I’m still not really happy with his fully human form but I actually love the way I drew his profile in this

[mejaemin]

timeless - lee donghyuck

wc: 1.6k

summary: visiting a photobooth, yours and hyuck’s love is evident, and with your pair of photo strips it’s now timeless <3

warnings: not proofread, sexual jokes, so much fluff, don’t read this if you’re single !!! it’s so cute and so romantic it will make you feel lonely !!! (i say while being single)

an: umm i may or may not have written this in one hour… i was completely stuck and decided to write a sentence, see what happens, and then all of a sudden i finished it 😨 i hope you all enjoy !!! i actually love this sm (˶◜ᵕ◝˶) tysm to my love @cigsaftersuh for requesting !!! enjoy ♡

(caramel masterlist here!! ʕ ᵔⰙᵔ⠕ʔ)

───── ⋆⋅ ⊹ ⁺ 𐔌 ᩧ ຼ ͡ ৯ ♡໒⁀ ᩧຼ ꒱ིྀ ⁺ ⊹ ⋅⋆ ─────

you’re making your way to the end of the amusement park, everyone in your group feeling very out of it. since at least two rides ago, your child, technically your boyfriend, had been dragging his feet. all of hyuck’s friends were getting tired too, you could see it in the way their eyes drooped and they lazily chewed at the cotton candy and other snacks in their hands.

it truly was a fun day, heading out at around noon to go to an amusement park all day with hyuck and his friends. it was something that you were truthfully dreading, being that you never really liked them that much, but the way his face lit up at the idea of attending was something you could never say no to. and truthfully, after a while they weren’t so bad. maybe their frontal lobes have all developed and are finally becoming men with humor that isn’t backed by jokes about farts and genitalia.

anyway, you’re getting closer to the entrance when donghyuck finally stops using you as a human crutch, grabbing your attention before pointing toward something in the distance. following the direction of his finger, you spot a photobooth in the distance and you’re immediately making your way towards it. he takes a large sip of whatever heavily sugared drink he bought earlier in the day, using it to wake up before telling the group where you’re running off to.

“we’re going to the photobooth, so don’t leave us while we’re in there.” he says, stretching and shaking away his fatigue.

immediately, jaemin’s looking at the metal box and its red curtain, smirking. “yeah, we’ll be waiting. don’t do anything other than take photos though..”

hyuck was fully ready to start fighting back, already forming an explanation as to why exhibitionism is perfectly fine but jaemin’s obnoxious cackles overpowered any and all of his rebuttals. accepting the slap on his shoulder, he huffs, making his way over to you.

you’re waiting patiently outside the booth, some other group already in there. he stands beside you, snaking an arm around your waist as you lean against the wall of it. truthfully, hyuck didn’t even have any sort of affinity towards them, but knowing you do he was more than happy to help you take any opportunity to visit them. he’s even bought you one of those cute binders for all your photo strips, pairing the gift with deco stickers for you to cover it in. of course, he got two to keep him and your friends separate as well.

“did you have fun?” you ask, pulling him out of his still sleepy daze.

he turns to you, smiling softly. “of course. best day ever.” he leans in, giving you a kiss to your cheek. “you didn’t have to say yes though, ‘cause i could tell you were hesitating when i asked.”

you flush, despite knowing he always sees through you. “yeah.. but now that we actually did it, i’m really enjoying myself. your friends aren’t that annoying anymore, too.”

he chuckles, sucking air in through his teeth. “of course. you showed me the way, so i enlightened them too.”

you hum, taking his arm in yours, resting your head on his shoulder. the sun is a perfect orange-purple, and the lights adorning all the attractions have flickered on a while ago. it’s truly picture worthy, but you’re more tired than you’d like to admit and choose to stay in the moment. you can see the group sitting at a picnic table, jisung’s flash accidentally turning on as he and the others try snapping photos of you two, and they giggle softly. you turn to point it out to hyuck but the other group is leaving.

he’s already dragging you in, sliding into the cramped booth before pulling you into his lap. before you can even make an attempt at paying for the photo strips he’s pulling his wallet from your bag (yes yours, why get something to carry his stuff when he buys you enough for the both of you?) and making the payment.

“how many?” he asks, gesturing to the screen in front of you. his arms slide around your waist, his hands resting over your stomach. the way his thumbs glide against your stomach make you feel a little dazed as you try reading the options, but eventually you pick the option with two strips.

“two copies. one for me, one for you.” you say simply, reaching out to click your option.

the countdown immediately starts, and you’re both full of giggles as you hurriedly try to decide your first pose. he’s throwing plenty out like spitfire, and through your fit of laughter you’re denying every one. ‘no, i’m not doing a nerd pose!’ or ‘nooo, something cuter!’ coming from you as he tickles you in attempt to stop your protests. eventually, the ten second countdown comes to an end, and the first photo snaps to capture a photo of you both giggling.

“aw, hyuckie, come on! i wasn’t even ready!” you complain, playfully swatting at his shoulder.

“oops. sorry mama, but come on. you’ll look hot regardless of how ready you were.” he dramatically looks you up and down, and you roll your eyes at his over the top flirting.

glancing at the screen, there’s eight seconds left, and you take his face in your palms. “let’s do an actually good one now.” there’s a speaker beeping signalling the last three seconds, and that’s when you lean in, giving hyuck a sweet, slow kiss.

even after the shutter sounds, he’s bringing you closer, pulling away to give you two, three more before he finally pulls away.

you sigh, recollecting yourself. “last one.. let’s be tame this time, okay?”

he nods obediently, ready to listen to you now that his need for your kisses has been fulfilled. you lean in, smushing your cheek against his with the cutest pout, and he mimics it immediately. with your hand brought up to his, you make a heart together, of course not without bending your pointer finger to make it a cat. the camera flashes one last time, and once the large pink bubble letters say you’re done, you excitedly get out of the booth to receive the printed strips.

waiting for them to fall out of the opening, you’re nearly bouncing on your feet. hyuck’s got your bag and he pulls his phone out, sneakily taking a few photos of you in your excitement before pocketing it for later. you’re just too beautiful for him to not capture it forever, your eyes glimmering with the multicolored lights all around you. once the photo strips are printed you pull them out, and you squeal, your smile growing impossibly bigger.

the first photo, of you giggling, is so perfect. you were apprehensive at first, afraid it was gonna catch your worst angle being that it was unexpected but it couldn’t have been better. your eyes are shut, smile big with pure joy. hyuck is looking up at you, his eyes glimmering with so much love. you didn’t notice it in there, but now that you’re looking at the photo your entire body heats at the way he’s looking at you like you’re the entire world.

the second one, you kissing, is adorable. you can’t wait to post it, knowing all your friends will be swooning over your relationship and you’ll be getting so many compliments about it. your hair is covering your face, the majority of it capturing the back of your head, but donghyuck is in almost full view. his eyes are shut, and his hand is making its way to the back of your head. the picture is radiating with love, and there’s no doubt in your mind that you’ll be showing it to your kids one day, and maybe even theirs.

the final one of you in your heart pose is the cherry on top, not outwardly romantic, balancing the other two out perfectly. you two look adorable in your little world together. your hand is on his cheek, pulling him into you, and both your lips are puffing up into a pout with how your faces smush together. it’s so you, and you know everyone will be able to tell you picked the pose out with the kitty heart.

there’s a pink, heart patterned frame around the photos, and at the bottom there’s the name of the park and a date. it blends the three photos together perfectly, and you’re thankful there’s no face warping photo. there’s a little bit of an orangey, hazy coloring over them, but it makes it all the better, giving it an old-timey romance vibe. hyuck’s skin is the right shade in all of them too, his tan being safe from any whitewashing technology.

“damn, can i see them yet?” he complains, coming forward and taking one of the two from you.

you look up at him expectantly, watching his reaction as his eyes trail down the strip. his cheeks flush, and he’s smiling lovingly at them. saying nothing, he looks to you and pulls you in for the sweetest hug, leaving a kiss at the top of your forehead.

as you make your way back to the group, he wraps his arm around your shoulder, “i actually really love this. like, i’m gonna get it tattooed right here.” he turns to you, already laughing at himself as his free hand makes a line across his forehead.

you giggle, leaning into him. “you’re so stupid! don’t do it, the photo is permanent enough.”

“true, true,” he says, laughing as you make your way to his friends, showing the photo strip. they’re all groaning, complimenting you two and your cuteness, all while complaining about their loneliness.

looking back down at his copy, his smile is soft. he’s the luckiest man in the world, having you, and he’ll be sure to never lose the strip as a way to remember and keep you forever.

───── ⋆⋅ ⊹ ⁺ 𐔌 ᩧ ຼ ͡ ৯ ♡໒⁀ ᩧຼ ꒱ིྀ ⁺ ⊹ ⋅⋆ ─────

[sunnibits]

practicing some johns….

[scrubbinn]

Mimic HRT: 18 months “Happiness”

You've reached the cutest M- M- M- Mimic ever! Please leave a message after the beep!

“… excuse me what day is it? Thursday? Ok. Thursday. Hey Mayday, I want you to actually listen to this message. Because I know you, and you’re probably being a dummy and beating yourself up about it. It’s not your fault ok? The doctor says I'll be out of the hospital soon, at least hopefully soon. I heard the doctors talking about an experimental treatment involving using that slime medication to regrow organs. It sounds terrifying but wouldn't that be neat, being a little bit slime. I'd get to see what it's like to be you… You better call me back, you got it! I'm not in any danger and I’ve been told I’ll recover one way or another. The medical stuff here is like really advanced compared to back home so I'm going to be fine. I've gotten visitors, you know. Mom came by and asked how you were. You know no one is mad at you right? A lot of our friends visited, and I found out they don’t even know what you look like! Come on, you know they all wanted to see you now that you’re fully a mimic… Please don’t start hating yourself because of this. It's understandable what happened, It's mostly my fault anyways. I shouldn't have startled you like that, I just saw you panicking and I had to do something. It's those assholes’ faults, not yours. I know I keep saying it but I know you, and you don’t listen until I tell you this stuff like eight times!”

“Excuse me Ms. Franks, We need phones off to discuss the next procedure. This will just be a moment of your time.”

“I just need to finish this call. Give me two more minutes. Anyway, you better call back ok hun? I don’t know how long that’s going to be an option, Surgery is starting today or tomorrow. You better call before than. I’m gonna be so mad if I get back to your place and you’re in another cocoon hiding away. So you better call ok! I love you Mayday. There, now you have to call me so you can say it back. Mwa! Later hun! I love you. So much.”

* * *

“Recording of Mayday… uh, Friday. Date… doesn’t matter. I, I’m not doing well. I don’t. I just finished crying for an hour and I feel well enough to record something so I don’t have to deal with Erian getting on my case! Sorry I shouldn't yell about him, it's not his fault. I said well enough but, well enough doesn’t mean I’m actually well. I- I don’t know if I can talk about it yet. I hurt Abi. I hurt her completely and irreparably. I don’t know what to do. I thought I was finally getting it. I was happy being a mimic and I still am. It felt like I was intangible before. Like my human body wasn’t real and could just pass through everything if I wasn’t careful. Now I feel so solid. I feel this body and I’m not rejecting it. But it is real now. It’s present. It can bump into things if I’m not careful. I am finally physically me and it feels impossible to navigate a world now. I didn’t know. Why doesn’t living come with a guide book that can tell me what I’m doing wrong. Was it from backing away? Should I have fully become a mimic and just left everyone I know. It’d be sad, sure, but it probably would have been safer. Erian told me if I continued on my crossroads I'd eventually calcify my outer layer to form a shell around me. Like a treasure chest or whatever a soap mimic turns into. Maybe if I was a chest I could lock myself away so I didn't actually hurt anyone. I don’t know anymore. What would even happen to me if I did that? Would I end up in a zoo? Would I eventually forget this whole thing and escape to hurt even more people? What the hell even is a mimic!? Oh universe, I’m just tired of thinking and having to exist. I should get some water or something. I’d like to get coffee, but as it turns out, caffeine is basically a poison to me at this point, and not one I can build a tolerance for… but the taste of poison would be better than what I taste now. Aria was right. The taste never leaves.

“I still haven’t called her back. I’ve been listening to her voice mail over and over but I can’t face her. I don’t have the right. She’ll be starting her surgery and I was told she’d be asleep for a while. I want her to wake up and the first thing she sees is me. I don’t know if I’ll be ready for that. What the hell am I saying, she wouldn't want to see me, I'm the reason she's in a hospital! I wonder if she decided to go with that slime treatment Erian patented. Slime buddies huh. Feels a little rude to enjoy that idea so much. I hope everything turns out ok. I want to talk to her again. I- I'm done. I just want to lie down for a while. End recording.”

* * *

Written report filed by Theodore Hans Erian, date, August 24th. Saturday It has come to my attention that a current patient by the name of Mayday Mulberry has begun to exhibit inhuman behaviors that have led to the injury of a human over the course of her treatment here. The event began one week ago when visiting outside Hypercity with the victim of the attack. This event has been documented through the testimony of several people at the scene, including the victim and the perpetrator. The incident began at a local sushi restaurant as the victim and perpetrator were patronizing the establishment. During their time at the restaurant, the perpetrator was verbally assaulted by several customers of the establishment using several anti-therian insults. These insults were deemed as unprompted as most of the witnesses there claim that Mayday Mulberry “insulted their species with its existence.” This harassment eventually led to the perpetrator panicking and running away, leading into a panic attack outside the restaurant in a shared parking lot. The victim followed and attempted to console the perpetrator with a hug, and unfortunately a mimic mouth from the perpetrator bit the victim. The victim lost a large chunk of flesh in the process. This led to damaged tissue, a hole in the stomach, and severe blood loss. The victim was taken to a hospital within Hyper city in time for treatment and was eventually stabilized. Because the incident took place within the parking lot of the restaurant within the perpetrator’s car, the restaurant has little chance to file any successful lawsuit. The victim has also declined to pursue any legal options at this time. It is within our opinion based on these facts that Mayday should be placed under house arrest and further punishment will be deliberated between our clinic, and Hyper city’s government, with a thorough psychological screening and Ms. Mulberry's medical records.

“Oh Ms. Mulberry, you’ve really done it now. You’ve already been a headache for this establishment but this is something much more serious. This affects the relationship between Hyper city and the outside worlds. Not to mention, this could seriously damage the clinic’s reputation and leave thousands of potential clients left without a place to obtain safe treatment. I will do what I can to make sure you suffer a lighter punishment from Hyper city, but you've caused a major incident that our mayor will absolutely use against all therians. If you’re not careful, you might end up in a situation far worse than living in a zoo for the rest of your life. If you’ve found a lawyer yet, please have them contact me to discuss the ramifications of your actions. In the meantime, I recommend you speak with a therapist on recent events. Situations like this can be just as dangerous for your mental state as they are with your friend’s physical state. Please call back when you get this message. Erian.”

* * *

“What are you doing Mayday?”

“I’m hiding away. Might as well stay here. I’m under house arrest after all. Or are you too stupid to remember the fact that you caused it?”

“There’s no need to take that tone against me. Insults will get you nowhere. I am asking why you aren’t picking up that phone? It’s still ringing. It’s from the hospital.”

“I know. I just, I don’t have to pick it up right?”

“You should. We need to know how she’s doing. You’re making nonsensical excuses not to have anything change. I don’t understand that, you literally took this medication so you can change forever. What was it how you originally described yourself? You were certain that you wouldn’t be certain. You need to see how she’s doing. To be certain. You owe it to her to check. She’s the reason you started your slime journey! She’s the reason you’re happy!”

“Am I happy? Because it feels like ever since Mayday decided to start this medication, nothing has gone right. Mayday ran away and I was left to pick up the pieces of her life. I can’t even tell if I’m supposed to be her, or if I’m someone new. I certainly don’t get treated like I’m new, I get treated like I just got a bump on the head and I’ll be right as rain in a month! I hate that I can’t be me.”

“You could always tell her that.”

“But she hates me. I nearly got her killed, for all I know she could be dead.”

“We won’t know until we pick up that phone, and then you can grieve.”

“Will it be ok? Can I stop hurting when I know?”

“I can’t promise that, but it’s easier when you talk to people…”

“…Hello?”

“Mayday! Oh my god, I couldn’t reach you at all yesterday! Are you ok?! Are you eating properly? Did you turn into a cocoon again? When can you visit? Do you need a kiss? Because I need a kiss from you right now!… Hun? Are you laughing? I can’t hear you, your phone sounds muffled.”

“…Hi Abi! I’m just. Really happy is all.”

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@aster-is-confused, @bloodandbrandywyne, @glitchgloop, @nyxthewary, @lunadook

[comfymoth]

How do you think the moment everyone finds out about siffirin werewolf situation plays out? Does it happen during the final fight? Or do they find him in wolf form where they were fighting the king?

oops i think i rambled too much time to stick this under a cut, also SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS, buuuuut—

it almost happens when they find him fighting the king, almost— but siffrin is still human enough that with his back to them his silhouette can pass, and as soon as he hears them he is desperately pulling the rest of himself back together. whatever can’t be shifted back is very gratefully covered by the hat and cloak, and even if he looks just a little bit off, everyone is too anxious to really notice the details.

it takes all their energy though, and does not help the fever they’re running. something euphrasie definitely gives them A Look for

so it’s that final fight, then, when things just fully break down. when they lose control, and change in ways they can’t hide, and their party sees what they are— and it’s. a shock. of course it is. but there’s only so much time to take it in, they need to actually deal with siffrin in that form first.

and then, then the explanation comes, at the same time he’s explaining his wish, i’m sorry, i didn’t want you to leave, i didn’t want you to find out what i was, and of course the first thing they tell him is it’s okay. of course it’s okay, they care about him, this doesn’t change that. why would it? it doesn’t change anything about who he is.

there is. a lot of crying. and siffrin’s still in a fair amount of pain, but he’s happy. he’s so, so happy

they do have at least a few questions they manage to get in. so that’s finally where the silly little wolfsbane comics fit! and that’s the rough rough outline of it all ^_^ yaaaayyy werewolves i love werewolves <3

[twistedtummies2]

Top 15 Evil Clowns

There are many fears one might consider “popular phobias.” These are terrors that are not only common amongst people in general, but frequently used, abused, and homaged in various works of popular media. They’re the sources of many famous movies and monsters. Among these popular fears you’ll see folks return to time and time again are arachnophobia, ophidiophobia, galeophobia (look up what all those words mean, I’m not telling you here)...and, of course, coulrophobia. The Fear of Clowns.

In reality, most clowns are not scary at all. They’re figures of fun and whimsy intended to make people laugh and entertain children. They work hard to practice their craft and usually do what they do either for want of money, or love of their career, or even both. However, over time, the imagery of the clown has become increasingly negatively stereotyped, to the point where it’s actually really hard to find genuinely friendly, humorous clown characters in fiction that have a lot of impact. There are a few, mind you - Bozo, Ronald McDonald, and Clarabell are three hopefully recognizable “good clown” names - but nowadays, most people see clowns in the same vein as zombies or vampires. Their innocent origins now seem almost forgotten, and as a result, the fear has become even more intense.

It’s not surprising, to be fair, that the clown has become so synonymous with evil as opposed to happiness. As many have pointed out (who are wiser than I), their heavily made-up faces and flamboyant costumes not only make for eye-catching and iconic visual elements, regardless of the circumstances, but can also make it difficult for people - especially very young people - to fully “connect” with them. As humans, we rely on certain features and physical attributes to tell what others are thinking or intending, and when they are covered up especially heavily, we naturally become unsettled. Beyond this, however, there’s also a wonderful dichotomy inherent to the idea of the Evil Clown: it’s the mismatch between the colorful, often humorous exteriors and the dark, horrific internal processes going on. They can be silly and fun, but they can also be dangerous. This applies to every form the iconography can take, from cartoon baddies to horror film bogeymen.

While I, myself, have no inherent fear of clowns, I’ve always found the idea of the Evil Clown to be fascinating. So, I thought it would be fun, as part of my October-fest of lists for 2024, to cover the topic and name some of my personal favorite examples of the trope. Some are scary, some are just cartoonishly nasty, but all of them universally give clowns a bad name. So, without further ado, here are My Top 15 Favorite Evil Clowns!

15. The Birthday Bandit, from Teamo Supremo.

Of all the characters on this list, the Birthday Bandit is arguably the least threatening, and one of the least well-known. While both of these facts hamper his ranking, he’s still worth mentioning. “Teamo Supremo” was a children’s superhero series made by Disney, inspired by a combination of old superhero shows from the 60s and 70s, and the works of Jay Ward - the creator of Rocky & Bullwinkle, George of the Jungle, and Dudley Do-Right, among other things. It focused on the adventures of three child superheroes; one of their most popular antagonists was the Birthday Bandit. The Bandit was a disgruntled children’s entertainer who turned to crime; while he mostly targeted birthday events, he would also strike on holidays and other special occasions. The main thing that makes the character so memorable, in my opinion, is voice: the Bandit was played by none other than Mark Hamill…and don’t worry, we’ll get to a certain OTHER famous clown of cruelty Hamill has played later in the list. We’re just getting started, ladies and gentlemen…

14. The Clown at Midnight.

This somewhat obscure horror-mystery venture was a made-for-TV film originally produced in Canada. Depending on where you look, the release date is listed as either 1998 or 1999, my guess being depending on the country you look at. While by no means a masterpiece of morbidity, it’s still a decently creepy adventure, in my opinion. The story begins when a young lady named Kate learns she is the daughter of a former opera star, who was killed under mysterious circumstances. She and her friends decide to try and restore the old opera house where her late mother worked. However, things take a turn for the deadly when a mysterious killer, dressed a clown, begins to stalk the teens and their teacher. Kate and her friends must try to figure out who is behind the makeup, while also attempting to stay alive. I won’t give away who the Clown is, or why they’re doing what they’re doing, but it’s the actor involved and the clown himself, as well as the atmosphere of the old opera house, that makes this movie worthwhile.

13. Punchinello, a.k.a. Mr. Punch.

The character of Punch, or more appropriately “Punchinello,” is one of the oldest examples of an evil clown in recorded fiction. Now, some of you may be thinking, “What? That silly slapstick puppet show that showed up in ‘Santa Clause 2’? Does that even count?” Well, yes: few people realize the origins of Mr. Punch are really quite disturbing. “Punchinello” is a type of clown character, and the famous figure from “Punch & Judy” is not nearly the innocent weirdo you probably would expect. The origins of Punch indicate he may not even be human, and in the classic Punch & Judy show…yeah, he’s a psychopath. He murders his wife, his child, his neighbor, a policeman, abuses various animals, and even clobbers the Devil himself just to keep his own soul out of Hell! While it’s all given this darkly humorous slapstick veneer, when you really look at the character and his actions, they’re pretty messed up. While I’ve always had a fascination with this folkloric figure, I count him low on the list because he’s really more recognizable as a character in a puppet show than anything else. Which, to me, kind of makes him sit in an odd place compared to other characters on the countdown. And while most people are vaguely familiar with the idea of “Punch & Judy,” I doubt very many really realize how thoroughly INSANE Punchinello is. Other clowns to come are much more overt in their darkness, and most of them are likely more recognizable AS clowns.

12. The Hobo Clown, from The Devil’s Carnival.

“The Devil’s Carnival” is a short independent musical movie, focused on three people who all end up damned to Hell at the exact same time. They soon discover that Hell is not the medieval fire-and-brimstone wasteland you might expect, but instead takes the form of a perverse carnival and circus. The three sinners thus face a challenge: if they can overcome their greatest sins in life, they will have a chance to go to Heaven. If not, they will be forever doomed to perform in the Carnival, facing death and torture for all eternity as punishment. The Hobo Clown is one of the demons working at the Carnival, and acts as one of two devils assigned to take care of the vain and greedy Miss Merrywood. The character was played by Ivan Moody - most famous as the lead singer of the band Five Finger Death Punch - and gets arguably the best song in the film, “A Penny For a Tale” - performed as he and his fellow carnies torment Merrywood after she fails her test. The film has a motif themed around Aesop’s Fables, and the song analogizes Merrywood’s downfall as a musical retelling of the fable of “The Dog and Her Reflection.” While this dark clown’s role in his respective source is relatively small, it is certainly VERY memorable.

11. Violator, from Spawn.

When most people think of evil clowns in comics, they most likely first think of Batman’s Joker. (And again, we’ll be getting to him soon enough.) However, the Caped Crusader is not the only comic book superhero to have a crazed and murderous clown for an arch-nemesis. Enter Violator - the arch-nemesis of Spawn. While I haven’t actually read much of the Spawn comics, I am primarily familiar with the character thanks to the (admittedly terrible) film adaptation, and (more importantly) the HBO animated series. The former had John Leguizamo, of all people, in the role (and he is arguably the best part of the movie), while the character was voiced by Michael Nicolosi in the TV series. Across all media, however, the character’s basic setup remains the same: Violator is a vaguely bug-like demon who typically takes the form of a crass, vulgar, sardonic clown as a disguise. Ostensibly, he’s in charge of training Spawn, so you’d think they’d be allies…but the Violator is resentful of his position, and only becomes more antagonistic when Spawn goes against his role as leader of Hell’s forces to fight against the Devil. Much of Violator’s evil comes from him trying to one-up his human-born rival, but he’s generally just an awful creature who enjoys suffering and violence in general. When you have a name like “Violator,” I think it’s a given you’re going to be pretty nasty by default.

10. Canio, from Pagliacci.

Alongside Punchinello, this is the oldest example on our list. It’s also the most arguable: while Canio is by no means a hero, it’s debatable how “evil” this clown really is. “Pagliacci” is one of the most well-known operas in the world. Composed by Ruggero Leoncavallo, it tells the story of a troupe of commedia dell’arte performers: chief among them is Canio, who plays the role of the clown Pagliacco in their shows. Canio is depicted as a devoted and kind husband to one of his fellow performers, Nedda…so, when he discovers Nedda is cheating on him with yet another one of their fellow actors, but doesn’t know which one, he plots to find out who her lover is and get revenge. SPOILER ALERT - this ends with Canio, unable to continue his next performance in his emotional distress, murdering both Nedda and her lover, Silvio, before the horrified audience. Canio is a complicated character: on the one hand, he’s typically shown in a sympathetic light: his love for Nedda appears genuine, and he doesn’t seem to be a cruel or abusive husband. HOWEVER, it’s indicated early on that Nedda is afraid of his temper and his possessive attitude towards her, which is why she begins her affair with Silvio. It’s not till he discovers the affair that Canio’s dark side comes out in full force, and even then, one can understand his impulsive and emotional actions. However, Nedda and Silvio aren’t depicted as necessarily bad people, either; they aren’t plotting to do any harm to Canio, and their own relationship seems equally genuine. There’s a lot of gray area here. Ultimately, I would say that double-homicide fueled by rage - however justifiable the act may or may not be - definitely counts Canio in the “Evil Clown” category.

9. Killer Klowns from Outer Space.

While Canio’s villainy is debatable, there’s no such argument to be made with the titular monsters in this cult classic horror-comedy. I mean, it comes with the name: they’re called “Killer Klowns” for a reason. As the title indicates, this movie focuses on a horde of carnivorous, clown-like extraterrestrials, who come to Earth seeking fresh prey to feast upon. The Klowns have powers and weapons that match their circus-like demeanors: they wrap people up in acidic cotton candy cocoons, hatch from eggs that resemble popcorn, have a spaceship that resembles a Big Top, and their only weak spots are their round, red clown noses. While the film is intentionally done in a cheesy, satirical style - fully absorbed in its own silly premise - these Klowns are a great example of what makes the trope so good. They are very funny and utterly bizarre, but they’re also depicted as being totally and completely evil, and have moments where they are genuinely creepy and disturbing. It’s clear that they fully enjoy their own sadistic antics, and take great delight in toying with the humans they kill and consume. The Klowns themselves, and the movie they hail from, are considered classic examples of the concept of Evil Clowns, and were so popular they even spawned a video game, where players are able to take control of the Killer Klowns and hunt down humans in a variety of absurdly despicable ways. I’ve never played the game, but if it’s in any way a match for the movie, I can only imagine it’s as fun as it is freaky.

8. Umlaut, from CarnEvil.

Speaking of video game clowns (as we did at the end of our previous pick), when it comes to the concept of evil circuses, carnivals, and so on, one game title always automatically comes to my mind: “CarnEvil.” A dark staple of arcade galleries from 1998 well into the 2000s, this - like Killer Klowns from Outer Space - was a combo of horror and humor. The game focuses on a thrillseeking protagonist who summons the titular CarnEvil: a twisted amusement park filled with monsters, ghosts, zombies, and…um…evil Christmas elves (no comment), all run by the mad showman, Ludwig Von Tokkentaker. Of course, psychotic killer clowns are all the rage at this place…and the most noteworthy among them all is our “host,” Umlaut. This disembodied jester’s skull - who flies around with his belled collar acting like a helicopter propeller - is the game’s mascot, and acts as Tokkentaker’s second-in-command. Throughout the our gory and grisly adventure, he introduces the different levels, giving each one a darkly humorous limerick to accompany them. In the climactic final sequence aboard his master’s phantom zeppelin, Umlaut confronts the player directly as a mini-boss, preluding the grand showdown between the MC and the leader of CarnEvil. As the most recognizable character from one of the most deliciously deranged arcade experiences of all time, Umlaut definitely deserves a place in my personal top ten.

7. Joker (a.k.a. Rascal), from Smile! Pretty Cure/Glitter Force.

There are quite a number of evil clowns, jesters, harlequins, and so on in the world of anime. A couple that I enjoy who didn’t make the cut include the Moderate Harlequin Alliance from “That Time I Got Reincarnated as a Slime” (yes, both of those titles are things), and Saggi the Dark Clown from “Yu-Gi-Oh!” However, my favorite example from anime would have to be this character. “Smile! Pretty Cure” is one entry in the long-running “Pretty Cure” franchise…and it’s also the ONLY PreCure series I’ve ever seen. (I’m not really a huge fan of Magical Girl shows.) The series is themed around fairy-tales, with three of its major antagonists - Wolfrun, Akaoni, and Majorina - all being characters from famous fairy-tales, and the show as a whole featuring references to other stories and fairy-tale elements throughout. With that said, the main antagonist of the show appears to be a totally original character, and that is this guy. In the original Japanese version, he’s referred to as “Joker.” The English Dub, which retitled the series as “Glitter Force,” changed nearly all of the major character names and other bits of terminology; in that version, the character was renamed “Rascal.” While the original Japanese version is definitely better, I’m going to refer to the character by that name in this description, simply because I find “Rascal” to be a more unique name than “Joker.” The four villains all plan to resurrect a dark entity known as “Emperor Pierrot,” and use his power to - of course - take over the world. It’s eventually revealed that Rascal is actually a part of Pierrot, given his own body and soul, and his greatest desire is to return to his Master and become part of him once again. Rascal will stop at nothing to achieve these goals, and while he at first seems like a goofball, he quickly shows himself to be the scariest and arguably the most wicked of the bunch. And considering his associates include the Big Bad Wolf and the Evil Queen from Snow White, that’s probably saying quite a lot. While the aforementioned Big Bad Wolf, Wolfrun (or “Ulric” in Glitter Force) is my favorite of the villains, Rascal comes at a close second, and was by far the most sinister of the group.

6. Kefka Palazzo, from Final Fantasy.

I’m not super well-versed in the universe of “Final Fantasy,” but I’ve played and seen enough to know a fair bit about Kefka Palazzo. And with what I know about him, there’s no doubt in my mind he’s one of my favorite video game villains, and therefore a shoe-in for a place on this countdown. Once upon a time, Kefka was meant to be a great hero: the first “prototype” of an intended army of Magic Knights, he was experimented on with Magitek (as the name implies, a sort of combo of magic and technology) to give him special powers. The experiment, however, did not go as planned: it DID give Kefka great powers, but also twisted his mind. Kefka is the jolliest nihilist you could ever hope NEVER to meet: he very literally cannot comprehend feelings like love, compassion, and loyalty, and doesn’t understand why people hold so many things as precious. So, like an errant child, he reacts to these things he doesn’t understand by destroying him. While Kefka is manipulative and cunning, his schemes and plots have no great ambition behind them: all he yearns for is death and destruction. Nothing matters to him but killing and ruining other people and the things they hold dear, and no amount of this meaningless horror is enough. He is both a tragic and decidedly deplorable character, and one of the most powerful and dangerous examples of an evil clown on this countdown.

5. The Ghost Clown, from Scooby-Doo, Where Are You?

This may seem like a weird one to place into the Top 5, but for me, it’s a no-brainer. While the Ghost Clown may not be the most threatening and scary of all the clowns on this countdown, he’s one of the first characters I think of whenever I think of the concept, as well as one of my favorite classic Scooby-Doo villains. Appearing in the episode “Bedlam in the Big Top,” the Ghost Clown is a mysterious figure, with a raspy, husky voice and hypnotic powers. It’s revealed that the Ghost Clown is a superstition among circus folk in this world: whenever the Clown shows up, it’s a sign that the circus is doomed. That certainly seems to be the case, as after the appearance of this particular specter, the circus he’s haunting begins to experience a variety of accidents, endangering the performers and causing nearly all of them to leave. It’s therefore up to the Mystery Inc. gang to find a way to stop the Ghost Clown, being the meddling kids they are. In typical fashion, it’s eventually revealed the supposed ghost is a crook in a costume, but I always liked the lore of the Clown being some sort of evil spirit and bad omen, and the Clown himself is just creepy enough to a memorable member of the Scooby-Doo Rogues Gallery. Shaggy, Scooby, and the rest have faced other clowns since then - from a man-eating robot clown to a zombie fond of balloon animals (yes, both of those are in other Scooby-Doo programs) - but none are quite as iconic as the Ghost Clown.

4. Fear, a.k.a. The Clown, from Star Trek: Voyager.

Played by Michael McKean, this creepy customer appeared in my personal favorite episode of “Star Trek: Voyager,” entitled “Thaw.” In this episode, the crew of Voyager stumble upon a group of humanoids - the last of their race - who are being kept in suspended animation, hooked up to an elaborate computer system. It’s revealed that this computer system places the minds of its users into a sort of “dreamworld.” This dreamworld is run by the Clown, a.k.a. “Fear.” Why is he called this? Because the Clown is a literal manifestation of fear itself: he tortures those in his dreamworld with their worst fears and most traumatizing memories, till they literally get scared to death. (Hmmmm…a clown who feeds off of people’s fears, and can make them experience them…where have I heard this before?) While the whole episode is a glorious blend of nightmare fuel and entertaining silliness, courtesy of Fear/the Clown, I think what makes me love it more than anything else is the way it ends. I won’t give away the ending here, but it’s one of the most haunting and emotionally ambiguous conclusions to any Star Trek episode, hands-down.

3. The Chief Clown, from Doctor Who.

From one sci-fi show to another. The Chief Clown is the secondary villain of my personal favorite episode of the Seventh Doctor’s era, “The Greatest Show in the Galaxy.” He is a member of the Psychic Circus: an interstellar circus that has set down its roots on the desert planet of Segonax, and is inviting people from all across the galaxy to tryout and become their next big act. The Doctor and his companion, Ace, go to see the show, and soon find themselves wrapped up in a massive conspiracy, involving extraterrestrial Gods and many buried secrets. The Chief Clown is the ultimate manifestation of the corruption of the circus: it’s indicated that, once upon a time, he was a simple and innocent entertainer, and was considered a genuinely great clown. However, he’s now become obsessed with the power he has over other people, and unlike the other circus performers - who seem more begrudging in their evil deeds, at least to some degree - the Chief Clown has completely embraced the madness. As the episode goes on, he gleefully carries out the will of his near-deity-like masters, and is more than willing to sacrifice not only random people, but his fellow longtime performers, to sate their demands. The character was played by Ian Reddington, and his performance is a major, MAJOR part of what makes the Chief Clown so memorable: he takes even the most simple lines and story beats and finds ways to make them fascinating to watch and listen to as they play out. As I’ve said, I’m typically not afraid of clowns…but this guy might be the one who creeps me out more than any other on the list. (pauses) Well…almost any other, at least. All in due time…

2. Pennywise the Dancing Clown, a.k.a. IT, from Stephen King’s IT.

I was actually tempted, at first, to place Pennywise - the clownish guise of the mysterious entity simply called “IT” from Stephen King’s story of the same name - much lower on the list. Mostly because…to be blunt, I’ve never seen a version of this story that satisfied me to 100%. Every interpretation - the book, the 1990 miniseries, and the two-part cinematic film treatment - has their own share of flaws, and also their fair share of good points. However, as time has gone on…while I have noticed more and more the issues with the story itself, I have also, conversely, gained more and more of an appreciation of the character of Pennywise. Whenever people think of the phrase “Evil Clown,” he (it?) is one of the first characters folks think of or reference. Every incarnation of Pennywise is slightly different, but all of them share the same basic idea: the clown is the preferred “costume” of a shapeshifting creature, referred to as “IT,” which feeds on people’s fear…and then feeds on the people themselves. What I love most about Pennywise in the book is the way IT is actually written: for all the problems the novel has, the monster, itself, is honestly so incredibly disturbing. Something about the way King describes the creature and its thoughts and words and so on makes it feel so unnervingly alien and cosmic. The screen treatments don’t capture this same nigh-Lovecraftian idea, but they are memorable in their own ways: Tim Curry’s delightfully over-the-top performance often feels more comical than truly chilling, but is certainly a memorable and entertaining execution, and it’s easy to see why so many people still feel scared of him, or at least enjoy him, to this day. Bill Skarsgard’s Pennywise upped the horror factor to the max, but still had a decent amount of humor and even manipulative guile to him, and gave the character a wonderful arc, as the eater of worlds and master of fear learns what it’s like to feel fear itself. Whatever version you prefer, there are few twisted harlequins quite as iconic as Pennywise the Dancing Clown.

1. The Joker & Harley Quinn, from Batman.

Yep. It’s finally time. You all knew this one was coming. And yes, I’m including Harley here, too: while I’ve personally become a bit annoyed with Harley’s ridiculous levels of misused popularity over the years - and nowadays she barely even counts as an “evil” clown, a lot of the time - I’d feel remiss to leave her out of the running entirely. The fact that it bothers me so many of her redesigns and reinventions almost seem to forget the fact she’s meant to evoke the iconography of a classic clown and jester should say something on its own. However, I’ll admit it’s mostly the Joker we’re talking about here. The Clown Prince of Crime is arguably the most famous supervillain of all time, and is one of the longest-lasting killer clowns on this countdown: he’s been around since 1940. I think the only clowns who have been around longer than him are Pagliacci and Punchinello; considering the latter has been around since the 17th century, and the former has been around since the late 1800s…yeah, I’d say the Joker’s near-85-year-run is still pretty darn impressive. If you need proof of just how much influence this character has had on me, if nothing else, you don’t even have to look at other things I’ve written; just go back over this list and see how many times I hinted at the Joker’s arrival, and how many characters here bear some resemblance - however intentional or not -  to the Ace of Knaves. There’s really not much more I even need to say to justify this decision: in my opinion, the Joker (and, to a lesser degree, dear Harley Quinn) are the ultimate couple of Evil Clowns. “Laugh, clown, laugh.”

HONORABLE MENTIONS INCLUDE…

Sweet Tooth, from Twisted Metal. (I don’t really know anything about this character or these games, but from what little I’ve learned, he seems fun in an utterly horrifying way.)

The Clown Doctors, from Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure. (Also the Clown Statue. Lots of evil clowns here.)

The Fireman Clown, from The Brave Little Toaster. (GOOD LORD, THIS THING WAS SCARY.)

Krusty the Clown AND Sideshow Bob, from The Simpsons. (Not sure how much either of these guys count - Krusty seems more “cynical” than “evil,” and Bob barely even qualifies as a clown - hence why they’re only Honorable Mentions.)

The Clown Doll, from Poltergeist. (I felt this fit more in the vein of “creepy toys” than “evil clowns,” but still worthy of an Honorable Mention.)

Mad Pierrot, from Cowboy Bebop. (He may not wear makeup in the original anime, but I still say he counts.)

[sasspleia]

Why do people fall in love? Or really, How? I once did a paper about this (In HS…. I was and still am a sucker for romance). Looking back I think the paper could have gone in so many different directions and ultimately it was never fully answered for me.

From what I understood at the time it was pheromones.

“Pheromones are chemical substances that are secreted outside of the body in fluids like urine and sweat.

Essentially, pheromones are a hidden form of communication.

They send signals from one individual to another of the same species. This triggers a response in the individual receiving those signals, such as a hormonal change or specific behavior”. https://www.healthline.com/health/pheromones

Gross right? Well it’s not fully proven today that pheromones exist in humans but at the time I was convinced (ahhhhh to be young again). I wanted to know how I could have the grand romance that you see in TV shows like with Bridgerton’s Polin. (See I’m getting to the point)

The chemistry we see with actors can be so convincing that what you see you now believe in.

Honestly I was sold when I saw Season 1 with Polin. I was hooked. I would go back and re-watch just the scenes with Nic and Luke Pen and Colin. I’m sure Netflix is wondering about my most watched (we won’t go there for obvious reasons)

I was not sure if I believed in love at first sight or a love that grows over time. I know that there is lust at first sight forsure. I also know you can be physically and mentally attracted to someone. But to have it all is a great wonder (maybe the actual 9th wonder of the world?) All I know is watching these two actors made me see that true honest love does in fact exist.

The chemistry on screen and off was one of the reasons that made me believe in that love. To have someone you can talk with about everything? Hang out no matter what with. The one that you can trust with the most intimate of actions… it just makes love worth it.

I was re-watching (let’s all be honest we all do this as well) some of the WT interviews and seeing that Luke remembers his first meeting with Nic shows me that, maybe love at first sight does exist and you may just not recognize it. Hearing that Nic who was jaded a little about love change her mind, well it made me see that they have a bond that nothing can break.

So, back to my original question to my HS paper, How/Why do you fall in love? Well my friends it’s quite simple. It can happen in an instant or over time. You can be attracted to someone because they make you laugh, their looks, the fact that they a good human being. There is not a correct answer to that. It all falls to chemistry. Does that person make you happy?

Xx🧡

[quakenshake]

Dating Chishiya Would Include Pt. 2

Hi, guys! I still have to do the second part of 'The Next Day', but wanted to squeeze this in beforehand. In the first part of Dating Chishiya, I focused on love languages, so with this one, I decided to do the alphabet! (Or half of it, anyways lol...) I will likely finish the rest of the alphabet at a later date, but hopefully, this will tide you guys over for now. As always, let me know if you have any requests! -S

A = Affection

Chishiya has never been comfortable with excessive affection. Truthfully, anything more than the occasional half-second hug is entirely new to him, giving him a feeling which he assumes to be dislike. But as your bond and trust grow, he begins to finally feel safe with giving and receiving affection. Once this barrier is crossed, he’s much more open to exploring things like hand-holding, snuggling, and longer hugs. That being said, he’ll never fully be comfortable with too much PDA, so you can expect most of these moments to happen behind closed doors.

B = Banter

Being that Chishiya is no stranger to sarcasm, you can expect a bit of banter in your relationship. And while his cold demeanor may come across as true annoyance, you know him better- he actually quite enjoys these moments with you. Teasing is a form of love language for him, and he’s happy to have a partner that can keep up with his wit. And, being a master of reading body language, he always knows how to reign it in before things go too far and he accidentally offends you.

C = Curiosity

Chishiya has always been the curious type- from a young age, he found himself drawn to complex questions about the universe, humanity, and most importantly: emotions. Being that he has always struggled to fit in or relate to others, he gained his observant nature by attempting to learn more about those around him. But once your relationship started, his curious nature became focused on you. Oftentimes, you’ll catch him watching you- even if its something seemingly miniscule like folding laundry, reading a book, or making dinner. He seems to soak in each and every decision you make, storing it away in his bank of knowledge about you. Sometimes it borders on unsettling, but you’ve come to enjoy that he pays attention to the details. In his own odd way, it shows how much he cares.

D = Dates

By now, you’ve come to accept that Chishiya will never be the outgoing type. Much preferring the comforts of home, it’s rare that Chishiya initiates venturing outside. For this reason, most of your “dates” take place on the couch, watching a newly released film you’ve both been excited for or playing a far-too-complex boardgame that he insists you’ll enjoy. But as mundane as these moments may seem to an outsider, you’ve learned that the truth is in the details. Sure, he may not treat you to a night on the town…but you’d better believe that he’ll come prepared with your favorite snacks, a comfy blanket to wrap you in, and the look of adoration only a lover could have. After particularly stressful days, he’ll even light a candle or two for you (the really smelly ones that he insists he hates.) And perhaps most telling of all is the fact that he never misses a single one, even with his busy schedule. 

E = Evenings

Given that both of you have busy schedules, your best moments with Chishiya tend to happen in the evenings. With work over and done with, coming home to each other is like a breath of fresh air each time. And while you may not have as much time with each other as you’d like, you both work to make each second count. Whether it’s sharing a dinner and talking about your day, settling in to watch the latest episode of your current tv obsession, or taking a shared bath and melting in each other’s arms, you’re always sure to be there for each other each and every day. It’s a lot of work, sure, but you wouldn’t have it any other way. And for this reason, you’ve come to view the evening as the best part of your day.

F = Flirting

I’m going to be honest…Chishiya is not much of a flirt. He can be witty, charming, and even give you compliments. But to call it flirting would be inaccurate. It’s not for a lack of chemistry between you, but merely because he doesn’t quite understand the point or how to do it. In truth, the thought of being flirtatious seems embarrassing to him- at least, that’s how it feels whenever he sees other people flirting. With that said, you adore flirting with him, mostly due to the way it makes him cringe. It’s your own special form of teasing that he barely tolerates. And if you’re in public? Even better. You’re sure to have him blushing by the time you’ve made it home. And while he’ll never admit it to you, he wouldn’t have it any other way.

G = Gentle

This was already kind of covered in Part 1, but Chishiya is surprisingly gentle when it comes to you. It doesn’t always come naturally to him, but he’s definitely learned to tone down his sarcasm and arrogance when your feelings are involved. He’s also made efforts to pick softer words for you, especially when you’re sad or upset. It’s taken a lot of patience and self-reflection, but he prides himself on being able to provide a comfort to you that he hasn’t quite figured out how to provide to others. And his efforts are definitely returned, with you being his greatest source of comfort as well. In truth, it was through you that he even learned how to be gentle- something he is immensely grateful for.

H = Handmade

When it comes to gift-giving, you both have fallen into a habit of making rather than buying. It started off almost as a running gag, with Chishiya gifting you a hand-crafted puzzle after you complained about your poor memory. You were quick to tease him in return, choosing to write him a list of ‘conversation starters’ after he complained of “overly-friendly coworkers who don’t know how to take a hint.” From there, what started as sarcastic half-gifts slowly formed into ones filled with meaning and love. His gift of a velcro phone attachment (because you always seem to lose yours) slowly morphed into a hand-painted canvas overlooking the bridge and pond at your favorite park. And your gift of a “happy mask” (i.e a paper mask adorning a comically large smile) slowly morphed into a collage of the patients he’s saved. In a sense, these gifts have become a special way of saying ‘I love you.’

I = “I love you”

I imagine that these three words in this sequence are probably one of Chishiya’s biggest fears���at least, when you first started dating. Being new to this, he was likely filled with confusion and doubt about when and why to say it. How could he know if he was really in love? Was he even capable of it? And if he was…how could he know you felt the same? Was there a timeline for these kinds of things? The thought of confessing something so large was likely overwhelming for him. So imagine his surprise when it slips out of his mouth at an ordinary moment, watching an ordinary movie, on an ordinary night with you. At first, he didn’t even catch it; perhaps he’d spent so much time rehearsing in his head that he hadn’t realized it had been said out loud. And when the realization finally set in, it was as if time stopped, only to be restarted when you said it back. From that moment on, those three silly words no longer seemed so scary.

J = Jealousy

Chishiya isn’t an exceptionally jealous person, but he definitely feels it to some degree. He’s not so much bothered by the physical stuff- a coworker hugging you goodbye, a friend standing closer than normal, etc. It’s the emotional stuff that gets him worried; seeing you have close bonds with others sometimes makes him insecure. After all, the only time he’s established a close bond has been with you and Kuina, both of which took a lot of time and trust. And because he treasures these relationships so much, he can’t help but wonder if you feel the same about anyone you have a bond with. Little does he know, he’s the only one on your mind. And whenever you sense these insecurities, they’re easily subdued with a gentle reminder of your love for him.

K = Keepsakes

One part of Chishiya that you weren’t expecting was his knack for hoarding things- in particular, mementos of your relationship. It was something you’d stumbled on by accident when cleaning out his desk, finding a small compartment filled with memories of your time together. A movie ticket from one of the rare times you guys actually went out for a date, a napkin filled with doodles that you’d drawn while out for coffee, a rock from the garden that you’d once pointed out as resembling a heart in shape, etc….each one a small glimpse of the bond you’ve formed together. And as much as seeing it made your heart fill with glee, you were careful to place each item back in its original position so as not to let on that you knew of his little secret. But on nights that he works late and you’re really missing him, pulling out the box of trinkets helps bring you comfort.

L = Letters

Chishiya may not be the  most expressive partner, but this doesn’t mean that he doesn’t care. Emotions are still difficult for him to navigate, and expressing himself often makes him feel vulnerable. However, the feelings are still there, and he needs some outlet for them….hence, the letters. It started as an experiment one day, early in your relationship; not quite ready to tell you how he felt about you, Chishiya decided to jot his feelings down in a journal, choosing the format of a letter to you. Originally, he had planned to give the letter to you, but instead chose to push himself to tell you in person. He kept the letter, though, feeling like it was something worth saving. From that moment on, he made it a habit to write you secret letters, never to be mailed. Stored in a top-secret location, he’s sure you’ll never find them. But as the relationship has grown, he’s found that he relies on them less and less, feeling like he can finally express himself to you without feeling so vulnerable. He still writes them, though, as it holds a special place in his heart.

[oreo102]

What's your favourite episode of 13's run and why?

Ok! I surprisingly enough do have a favorite episode… but it’s by such a small margin I’ve made an executive decision to talk about 2 other of my favorites episodes and then a few honorable mentions and why I love them

I’m half sorry for how long this is, I’m fully sorry for the fact that it took a while to actually put my thoughts to words

We’re starting with my absolute favorite because that’s what was asked lol. The Power Of The Doctor is my favorite episode, the plot is fun but it’s really the characters that make me love it so much! Every character that shows up is used really well.

Yaz is absolutely the star of the episode. I love her in every episode but especially in this one she shines a lot. She takes charge so well and really does fill the docs shoes with flying the tardis and making the plans and all that jazz. Her interactions with everyone is amazing to watch but especially the master, their dynamic is so interesting to me! Mandip also does a great job portraying emotions in this one- her anger at the master, and sadness about 13 regenerating in particular is one of my favorite parts. Also yaz with a gun is hot, and I fully believe she woulda shot the master if he gave her a reason so this episode would be in my top five just for that

Speaking of the master! This is 100% his best appearance. The dancing, the outfit, his interactions with yaz being a mix of cruel and endearing, in a way? Maybe that’s not the right word… interesting at the very least. The way he talks to her like they’re friendly, like they both know the doctor very well… kinda like they’re two sides of the same coin, in a way?

13 is lovely in this episode. A) I ADORE the navy version of her coat and am so happy they brought it back in the inbetween cliff (or whatever that was) B) her regeneration might just be one of my favorite scenes, even if it pains me to watch (ignoring 14’s existence for this) and the hologram is so smart (btw does yaz still have that? Do you think it activates still?) also love the fugitive doctor appearance even if it was hologram form. Her comforting yaz, their conversation, the icecream <333333

Love ace and Teagan and vinder, they’re all great but especially ace is SO FUN and I love her interactions with graham(did they flirt?) who btw, I love that he was right back! Too bad Ryan isn’t there tho, it’s fun to see how the dr leaving affects the companions, the bitterness Teagan holds is definitely a really fun bit that I’m glad they included. Also Kate is amazing as she always is! Dan wasn’t that bad either but I’m still glad he didn’t stick around

Also! I really like the plot! I saw someone complain about having all 3 cybermen, daleks and the master in the same episode but honestly it was just super fun- and the master was really the main villain with the cybermen and daleks as minor/background/subvillains. I much approve fun plots over anything else and having the master dance to Rasputin is very fun!

Onto The Woman Who Fell To Earth!

Yes, 13’s first and last appearance are my favorite episodes! This will be much less in depth but I did recently rewatch this one so it’s as fresh in my mind as the first.

I really like how… snappy they all are, in a weird way? The fam kinda mellow out through the series, especially Graham. Theyre all somewhat aggressive in this one and it’s very fun! It’s too bad grace died… she’d have made a great companion

Also the plot, the plot is great. 13 making her own sonic, not remembering who she is but knowing she has to help people, picking up the first humans she sees (which she has a habit of throughout the series, lol), being super smart! Just lovely! Also her in a suit is hot

“I’m calling you yaz, cuz we’re friends now.” Is 100% one of my favorite quotes too

Also Swiss army sonic should’ve been a running gag, it’s funny! I think that’s everything- my thoughts on this episode are very disconnected but oh well

My third favorite: the witch finders!

I’m not actually sure why I love this episode so much? Actually yes I do, soaked 13 is hot- that’s not the only reason tho, promise.

The fam is great, as always, but especially yaz this episode. It portrays how kind she is really well! 13 experiencing sexism and being pissed about it is also really cool, I kinda wish we got at least one other episode where it happened but I understand why we didn’t . Also the king being gay for Ryan is funny as fuck and I didn’t notice it my first watch

The background(side?) characters are also really good- the possessed lady is a fun antagonist, and the king is wonderfully incompetent at his job.

Also 13 telling them not to interfere and then immediately interfering is fantastic. I don’t think I have much to say about this one? I just really like it

Honorable mentions!

The timeless children, solely for the scene with Graham and yaz being family and for yaz being halfway to the portal by the time Graham is done asking who’s first- tbh this is my least favorite appearance for the master and I think the cybermasters are stupid so

Arachnids in the uk I love yaz’s family, i love jade, i love that the bitch ceo gets schooled by women in stem and yaz’s mom, i like that when asked if she and the doctor are together yaz’s response is “we’re [just?] friends!” But when asked the same about ryan it’s a very emphatic “no!”, I love “more of the universe… more time with you.”

Demons of the punjab “we can’t have a universe with no yaz!”, young umbreen is so much like yaz it’s amazing, i love yaz in this episode (this, ive realized, doesn’t say much, I love her in every episode), the plot is really fun and again i love yaz’s family

The legend of the seadevils my beloved gays. The characters are all really fun, the plot is great, all the thasmin moments I love and they hurt my heart, and Dan has a stupid outfit!

Eve of the daleks once again: my beloved gays! The plot is so fun, and even though the side characters aren’t my favorite I still really like them

Fugitive of the judoon FUGITIVE DOCTOR MY BELOVED <333333 also Jack is cool

Oh also My least favorite is resolution because it’s boring. Ok I think that’s everything… hope you don’t regret asking!

[station-aspenville]

Chapter 2.

- Good evening, Aspenville! - said the enthusiastic voice. I was glad to see Alistair not giving up on his plans.

- Today is a beautiful day. - he continued - The sun has been shining bright since the morning which was quite a pleasant surprise considering how foggy this town tends to be. What I find most beautiful however, is the progress I made in my research, and you’re going to hear all about it!

He seemed… happy? The joy I sensed in his voice was quite a radical contrast to the rather anxious and depressive tone of yesterday's program. I can’t say I wasn’t glad to see him finding a purpose during such grim and unnerving times, yet I couldn’t help but worry that he might not have fully grasped the gravity of the current situation.

- So far I decided to focus on writing down all the information I’ve already gathered, in The Book of Truth. - Alistair went on with the same enthusiasm as before - The late attacks are caused primarily by creatures, my brother referred to as “monsters”, I however prefer the term “Strangers”, since that is very much what they are to us, with how limited our knowledge of them is.

The amount of excitement he expressed as he talked about his research reassured me that it’s barely more than childish, but I knew that actively trying to put him down would have no use, so I decided to go along with it and try to enjoy the show.

- They are approximately seven to eight feet tall and made of some strange matter. We don't know what it is yet or whether it even originates from this planet. I’m well aware of how outlandish claiming that their origin might be alien sounds, but you have to agree that this entire situation is in fact outlandish; I deeply believe that in cases like this one we can’t rely just on what we already know as facts.

I’ve said this before, but Alistair’s eloquence was no less than impressive. A combination of prewritten script and natural charisma, I would suppose. Still very pleasant to listen to, even if at times he gave off the impression of a kid using words he doesn’t really know the meaning of yet, to sound more mature.

- Relying purely on the knowledge you had before and closing yourself for new ideas and possibilities is what I would consider to be the opposite of science; and one day I’d like to call myself a scientist.

He sounded so confident. I’d love to one day see Alistair interviewed in some kind of science program; once all of it is over, perhaps. What a hopeful thought.

- Back to the topic - he continued - what we do know about Strangers is that they're perfectly capable of causing harm to other living beings. In fact, their attitude towards humans seems extremely negative and aggressive, which manifests in the violent behavior they exhibit. I dedicated quite a lot of time to observing their behavior patterns which lead me to question whether they’re even fully continuous or capable of complex thinking; or any form of thinking for that matter. I’m wondering, perhaps to them the violence they exhibit is more of a defense mechanism than anything else; perhaps they fear us.

Alistair was kind;  too kind as some may say. This poor boy tried to empathize with the very beings that killed his parents and have been tormenting his precious little town for past weeks. What a foolish child he is.

- Each of them has at least one pair of large holes, illuminating a white glow, placed on their skull, which function as their eyes. I considered the possibility that all Strangers might be completely blind, and as much as I still think this may be the case for most of them, from my observations it seems clear that some of them are extremely sensitive to light. This trait can be easily weaponised against them, although I wouldn’t recommend it as a reliable self-defense tactic, since you could never know whether it would actually be effective. However if you want to figure out how likely the individual you’re dealing with is to possess said sensitivity, I’ve noticed that it’s more common in Strangers with more than one set of eyes. Speaking of which, there are some rare cases of Strangers having not only multiple sets of eyes, but also an additional pair of arms. Those individuals seem to be particularly threatening, since Strangers mostly rely on their extremely long and sharp fingernails as a weapon. I would advise you to by any means never come in contact with those individuals, or any kind of Strangers for that matter. In case you need to leave your current location, which is not recommended, but necessary in some cases, I would advise you to carry a flashlight with you. It may not be the most reliable form of self-defense, however it is the only one we know of so far. In situations like that, being aware of the weaknesses of the beings you’re dealing with, as well as knowing how to weaponize them is crucial. I would also advise you to  n e v e r - Alistair empathized - leave the location you’re hiding in, if that’s a possibility for you.

Alistair seemed to be struggling not to show excitement while talking about all of this. He clearly had a lot of interest in the current situation and the mysterious nature of it, but the way he approached it seemed rather inappropriate. No matter how serious he tried to sound, he couldn’t change the fact that deep inside he views it as no more than a game. This kind of approach should be considered alarming. Dangerous even.

- Since we already talked about their weaknesses and how you can protect yourself from them, I think it would be good to mention how we became aware of their presence. As I said before, at the moment we know nothing about their actual origins, only the things we’ve seen with our own eyes. The first appearance of a Stranger has been reported on October 11th 1960, in the field of sunflowers, here in Aspenville. Barely a couple of weeks ago, in the very same field you can view from the roof of this radio station. - Alistair paused, likely trying to figure out what to say next - They seem to be drawn to sunflowers, we can only speculate why. 

Alistair made another short pause and then added with a slightly more disappointed tone.

- Although, I really wish that turns out not to be the case after all. - the shift in his tone kept becoming more and more noticeable - We have a few sunflowers growing here, in the garden outside of the radio station. They’ve been here since forever, or at least as far as I can recall. Seeing them, every time I came here to visit my mom after school, always filled me with the strange comforting warm feeling, I cannot properly describe. Perhaps that’s why sunflowers are my favorite flowers - he giggled - or perhaps it’s the meaning they carry. Sunflowers always turn their faces towards the sun, and that’s very much how I aspire to be. I wish to always see the brighter side of life, to never lose my hope and share this positivity with others; I wish to always face the sun. It would be a shame if I had to get rid of them…

Alistair didn’t want to be forced to pull his childhood memories from the ground by their roots. Neither did he want to later be forced to dispose of them, knowing very well that looking back at them might end up as a lethal danger. How sweet of him.

- To be honest - the boy went on - the date we claimed as the beginning of this mess is one pretty particular to me as well…

Alistair’s enthusiasm was gone. The monotonous melancholic voice which replaced it gave me shivers.

- October 11th 1960 is the day known as the first noted appearance of a Stranger in the town of Aspenville. However, it is also the day I turned 17. I can’t say I’ve ever been the type of person to attribute much of a value to this date. In fact, I’d rather forget there’s anything special about it. Now I cannot do that. I also can’t say that this major tragic event changed my feelings towards this day in any way. If anything, all it did was reinforce my belief that October 11th is a cursed date. 

Alistair went silent again. This time for a little longer. It was clear the topic of his birthday is something he wasn’t comfortable discussing. One could only speculate why that is, and I chose not to. It was nobody’s choice but Alistair’s how much of this story he’s willing to share. I was in no place to care for it in any way after all.

- I feel like I’m rambling again. Sorry for what I just said. I made all of this sound way too dramatic anyway. - he broke the silence with a forcibly less monotone, yet still clearly upset voice - Instead of boring you with this sort of useless information, I should probably just end the broadcast here. I’ll try my best to contact the experts, in hope of getting some new information on Strangers, tomorrow. Until then, sleep well, Aspenville. 

With those words the radio went quiet again.

[moviemunchies]

Heck yeah, I’m on board to watch Guillermo del Toro’s take on Pinocchio!

Del Toro’s Pinocchio decides, for Reasons, to set the story in the days of fascist Italy. The basic story is the same, though there are some adjustments to deal with the setting update. But most of all, this story wants to ask a question of whether Pinocchio needs to change at all. The traditional ending of this story is that Pinocchio is changed into a real boy, a human person, and this movie (spoiler alert, but it’s a del Toro movie so it shouldn’t be a surprise) suggests that turning physically human isn’t what the main character needs, nor is it that he should learn to be an obedient boy. Yes, he needs to learn and grow over the course of the story, but what matters isn’t that he’s human, what matters is that he is the best he can be, regardless of the form he is in.

It’s also worth noting that the Wood Sprite, who brings him to life, never suggests the possibility of turning Pinocchio into flesh and blood.

[Guillermo del Toro is not the only director of the movie, by the way.]

Stop-motion animation is an incredibly underrated form of animation, and it’s a shame that you rarely see it used these days. I understand _why_, of course–it takes a LOT of time and effort to do what you could be doing in other ways. But the end result is so rewarding to see on screen, because you have something that is not real, but also looks and seems physically real, because it’s using actual objects. This movie uses its animation beautifully to tell its story, mixing realistic-looking sets and more human-looking characters with the fantastical through figures like Pinocchio, Sebastian J. Cricket, and the Wood Sprite.

The movie makes the very interesting choice of setting itself in fascist Italy. This isn’t entirely new to del Toro–he planned to set his Beauty and the Beast movie in Napoleonic France before that got canceled. But this is something a bit heavier than that. Here is a society that demands obedience without question, and here is a boy whose very nature is not to obey authority without understanding. Pinocchio is disobedient to everyone when he’s first brought to life, though it’s often because he really doesn’t understand any better why he should be. Once he forges bonds of love he’s better with people and slightly better with obedience (but only slightly), but he still doesn’t go with fascist nonsense because that’s what it is! No one bothers to explain it to him, either, just that you HAVE to obey this regime, when Mussolini (yes, he does appear in the movie!) is a slow, short, stupid man who has no real reason to claim the authority and adoration that he does. Then you have the Podesta, who only sees Pinocchio for the potential he has to the army as a soldier who cannot be permanently killed. He doesn’t care to know how that power even works, he just sees it in action and decides to throw him into battle training.

Fascism is just dumb, guys. I hope we can all agree on that? Anyhow.

[As a side note, I think it’s really cool how the movie is set in an actual part of history. Fresh off of reading the Winternight Trilogy, I appreciate seeing fairy tale type stories put in the context of real-world history, and how the two interact. That’s not a criticism against fairy tales that don’t do this, I just think it’s a cool twist on the genre.]

And spoiler alert! Fully in line with other Guillermo del Toro stories, Pinocchio asks whether the idea of our title character becoming human is really the happy ending for the story. In a world in which the monstrous or non-human is increasingly used as a code or metaphor for the marginalized in society, the idea of saying, “Turning them ‘normal’ is the happy ending!” becomes more than questionable. What does it mean to be human? The answer for the film seems not to be about flesh and blood as much as love.

Sebastian J. Cricket is a delightful character, and fun to watch; however, while he serves as narrator I often feel like he really has so little effect on the Plot that at times I wondered why he was there. It isn’t until the end that he starts having actual things to do in the story. Yes, he’s supposed to help Pinocchio figure things out, but Pinocchio never listens to him so it’s hardly meaningful. What’s weird is that the behind-the-scenes feature on Netflix has del Toro declare that he made the Cricket the main character, which he’s really not? It felt like an odd declaration to make.

I also find myself asking: who is this movie for? I would not really call this a children’s movie. Not because I think it’s too scary–there are scary images, but I think that children are more resilient to this sort of thing than adults often give them credit for. But this movie deals with pretty heavy things–it’s not like the fascism is only window-dressing, it’s pretty explicitly part of the story and how the villains operate. I don’t think children will understand it, and I don’t know how many parents want to have that conversation with their kids. I also think that with the conventional wisdom being that entertainment for adults needs more violence and sex, that this film doesn’t fit that bill. I think adults would enjoy it just fine, but I don’t know if it’s marketed towards them. 

In the end though, I think it’s a very fine movie. I’ll admit that I don’t know the animated Disney movie that well (I haven’t seen it in decades, but I remember I didn’t like it that much), but I certainly think this one stands on its own as a worthy adaptation. It certainly changes a lot, to make it kind of its own story, but it’s such a good and memorable film, brimming with creativity and so you’re better off giving it a chance just to see its approach.

If you watched the movie and liked it, I fully recommend the behind-the-scenes feature that’s on Netflix. You’ll get some fun little notes about the making of the movie, how the people in production felt about the process, and some word from the cast about their roles.

[shiningwonderland]

Cecil Aijima (Repeat)

Translator: Raz (Twitter: agnadance)

Proofreader: Sera (Twitter: serayagami)

Editors: Melanie (Twitter: melabonbon), Plaid (Twitter: cecillovemail)

QA: Rei (Twitter: wolfe_raine)

May — Warped Rock

Beep-beep-beep! Beep-beep-beep!

Haruka Nanami: Mm... just five more minutes...

I stretch my arm out, reach for the alarm clock, and freeze when I see the date.

May 15th…

I'm sure yesterday was still April…

I panic and switch on the TV. A newscaster reading from their script appears and the date is definitely May.

Newscaster: There have been reports all over the world that musical instruments cannot emit sound for some unknown reason, and that singers have lost their voices...

Haruka Nanami: Instruments... can't emit sound...

I feel my stomach drop and turn off the TV.

Select the Phrase!

呪 いって本当だったんだ The curse is real after all. (+10 Love +5 Music)

It's just as Cecil-san said yesterday... I didn't completely doubt him though.

What he said was just so removed from reality that I couldn't grasp it.

But now I fully understand. The world has been turned upside down.

And, on top of that, what felt like one day to me was actually a whole month passing...

I'm so scared.

If things continue on like this forever…

Twelve days for me will actually be a whole year in reality. Just four months will be ten years... and one year will be thirty years…

My mind will stay the same while my body grows older and older…

Chills run down my spine. My life will end in an instant. I can’t put up with this.

What’s more…

A world where you can't sing... you can't play music…

At this rate, the world will become such a lonely place.

A world without music... that's just too sad.

Kuppuru: Music is slowly drifting away from the world.

Kuppuru suddenly appears at my feet and talks to me.

Select the Phrase!

へぇ、喋れるんだぁ. Oh, you can talk. (+20 Love +0 Music)

Kuppuru: Yes.

Ah, just as I thought...

... The goddess of music has been defeated by the demon king. All that remains in this world with no music is a curse.

Everything is just so unbelievable that I guess a talking cat isn’t a big deal anymore.

I’m scared by how normal it is now.

Kuppuru: You and I are bound by a contract now. From now on, we can speak not with words but through our souls.

Haruka Nanami: Contract…?

Kuppuru: The kiss of avowal… Lips are where song forms. They are where the magic of music is the strongest. Your music and mine have become one through our lips. 

Kuppuru: That is the contract. The bond of our souls. From now on, I need to kiss you to receive the power of music from you… In order to return to my original form.

Haruka Nanami: You need… to kiss…?

I recall what happened yesterday and my face grows hot.

That… wasn’t a dream… was it? I really did kiss him… kiss Cecil-san…

Kuppuru: To compensate for the power of the curse, I need the strength of the Muse. It is difficult to fight with my own power. I need to kiss you once more…

Kuppuru lightly jumps onto my lap.

Haruka Nanami: What!! No, I can’t!

I quickly answer, completely flustered.

Kuppuru: ... Why?

Kuppuru, looking troubled, tilts his head.

Aww… S-so cute…

No, that’s not it! That’s not what this is about!

Haruka Nanami: Kisses… are something precious… They can’t be given just like that…

Kuppuru: A kiss is proof of love. I love you. That isn’t enough?

Even when you put it like that… Hrrrmmm… what should I say?

Select the Phrase!

そうじゃなくて。。。 That’s not it. (+20 Love +0 Music)

Haruka Nanami: Um… I’m… very happy that you feel that way. However… we only just met so I can’t exactly say that I like you or love you…

Haruka Nanami: I really love Kuppuru, but I can’t think of you the same way when you’re human. Therefore, I feel hesitant about kissing you.

Kuppuru: I apologize. You were always so kind, so I believed that you would not mind. I will wait, no matter how long...

Kuppuru: I will wait until your heart returns to me. I will protect you. I will continue to protect you…

Kuppuru: Besides that, this…

Kuppuru takes a letter in his mouth and drops it in my hands.

Haruka Nanami: A letter?

“Be careful. A Class Ittoki, Hijirikawa, Shinomiya and S Class Ichinose, Jinguji, Kurusu are in Satan’s hands. However, there is still hope.”

There’s nothing else written on the letter. But…

Kuppuru: I saw this letter in front of your door this morning... I don’t know who sent it… I wonder who would… And… what do they mean by… hope…

Kuppuru: It’s worth looking into…

Kuppuru and I head to the school with apprehension.

Kuppuru: ... This is...

Kuppuru stops suddenly in front of the entrance and his whiskers prick up.

Haruka Nanami: ... What's wrong?

Kuppuru: I sense the Muse... and Satan.

Immediately after Kuppuru finishes speaking, 

Otoya Ittoki appears on top of the roof.

Otoya Ittoki: MUHAHAHA! You actually came, the WAAAARRIORS of the Muse!!

Ittoki-kun stands on the roof, looking down on us.

Otoya Ittoki: The music score that YOU are looking for is within THIIIIS MAN! BUT! He is already under my CONTROOOOL.

Otoya Ittoki: If you want the music score, you have to come AAALL the way up here! HAAA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

Flutter. He flips the hem of his jacket and moves back from the rooftop fence and disappears from our sight.

...

Uuuum... That was... Ittoki-kun... right?

Haruka Nanami: Ittoki-kun... he's talking like a completely different person. He really is controlled by Satan.

Haruka Nanami: We have to save him, quickly!

Kuppuru: Let us head for the roof.

Shudder.

The moment we entered the school, shivers ran down my spine. I had a really bad feeling about this.

Then...

Male Student A: Ah... ughhh... aahhh...

Male Student B: Ugah...

Haruka Nanami: Huh...? W-what...?

Students surround us out of nowhere.

Is everybody... OK?

But... the look in their eyes scares me... Their eyes don’t seem focused... There's no light in them.

Kuppuru: Haruka, run! Quickly! These people are controlled by Satan!

Haruka Nanami: Eh... eh!!?!?? R-run where...!?

We're completely surrounded!

Haruka Nanami: Uuu...

W-w-w-what should we do...

Select the Phrase!

歌う Sing. (+10 Love +10 Music)

... Wait, the news said it was impossible to sing right now. 

But...

I try to sing a little.

Haruka Nanami: Ah... I sang...

But the situation doesn't change.

Male Student A: Ahh... ahggh...

Male Student B: Guh... gurrr... uu...

T...they're like zombies... scary...

Kuppuru: Urgh... aaaAAAAAAH!!

Kuppuru lets out a hoarse yell and the next moment, he begins to glow brightly.

The light forms into the shape of a person and he returns to being—

Cecil Aijima: Haa... haa... haa... I... I somehow succeeded...

The zombified students are a bit blinded by the light Kuppuru gave off and cower.

Cecil Aijima: Haa... haa.. haa... Now's the time... Come here...

Cecil-san grabs my hand and runs.

As soon as we enter the classroom, Cecil-san begins drawing a pattern on the door with a piece of chalk.

Cecil Aijima: Lock. Seal! ... With this, they cannot come in... .. Haa.. ha... haa...

Cecil-san leans his back against the door and breathes heavily.

Haruka Nanami: Cecil-san... what's wrong? Are you OK?

Cecil is completely different from yesterday when he transformed from being Kuppuru...

He seems like he's in pain... What's wrong...? I wonder if he's sick... I'm worried...

Cecil Aijima: Do not fret... My Princess. I will... protect you... no matter what...

Haruka Nanami: I'm fine! I'm more worried about you!

Cecil Aijima: I... I am fine...

It hurts to see him smile while he suffers. He's clearly in pain... why? Is there nothing I can do?

Select the Phrase!

わたしにできることは？ Is there anything I can do? (+20 Love +0 Music)

Once I say that, Cecil-san gives me a pained look.

Cecil Aijima: Thank you, My Princess. However... I would become dependent on you again. Therefore, I refuse.

Haruka Nanami: But I'm worried. I might not be reliable, but is there really nothing I can do?

As soon as I say that, Cecil-san holds tight.

Haruka Nanami: U-uhm...

When I become flustered, Cecil releases me and smiles.

Cecil Aijima: ... Your feelings are appreciated. I am happy.

Just... my feelings...? Is there really nothing I can do...? I can’t take this.

To think I can’t help someone in need right in front of my eyes...

Cecil Aijima: Outside has become quiet. Let us depart.

Haruka Nanami: Okay.

Again, we head for the roof.

Otoya Ittoki: Hoho... I'm surpriiiised you were able to get past my guards!

Otoya Ittoki: But your advance ends here...! TAAAAKE MY "NEGATIVE FIRE BOMBER"!!!

Once Ittoki-kun yells, a yellow light flies out of his body. At that moment...

He goes limp.

Ittoki-kun, like a puppet that lost its strings, falls to the floor.

Haruka Nanami: Ittoki-kun!!!

Without thinking, I run and hold Ittoki-kun's body in my arms.

Cecil Aijima: Ah, Haruka! You can't! Don't go close to hi—

Otoya Ittoki: He...lp... me...

Ittoki-kun weakly pleads for help. I can’t leave him like that.

He might have been freed from Satan's curse...

Haruka Nanami: What's wrong, are you alright?

I feel a tight grip.

Ittoki-kun grabs my arm and pulls me close.

Haruka Nanami: Eh? Ah... um...

Otoya Ittoki: Nanami... Please listen to me...

Ittoki-kun's lips draw close to my ear.

Otoya Ittoki: Cicadas... The larvae sleep in the cold, dark earth for a very, very long time.

Eh... Is this...

Cecil Aijima: Can this be... the legendary "Life of a Cicada"... People who hear it become depressed and get drained of all their liveliness! The fearsome magical chant!

... The Life of a Cicada is a magical chant...? I guess I do get sad when I listen to it... But I don't think it's making me depressed...

Besides that, I'm more shocked at being hugged by Ittoki-kun!

Otoya Ittoki: They stay inside the earth where the light doesn't reach them. They stay in that dark place for many years, and even when they finally reach a place touched by sunlight...

Haruka Nanami: Um... uh... can you let… let me go...?

I try to squirm my way out of Ittoki-kun's arms...

But he holds me tighter than before and I become immobile.

Otoya Ittoki: They can fly towards the sun only for a moment... just a summer dream...

Cecil Aijima: Ugh… I need to separate them.

Otoya Ittoki: Hmph, it’s pointless.

Snap!

Ittoki-kun snaps his fingers and an invisible wall appears in front of Cecil, blocking his hands.

Cecil keeps striking the invisible wall but it won’t budge.

Haruka Nanami: Cecil-san!

While Ittoki-kun keeps holding on to me, I reach out my hands towards Cecil… but they can’t reach.

Otoya Ittoki: Nanami. I told you, it’s impossible! Just give up and listen to me.

He grabs my arms reaching out for Cecil and holds them down.

Haruka Nanami: N-no…

Otoya Ittoki: Idols are just like cicadas.

Haruka Nanami: Eh…?

Idols are like cicadas?

Otoya Ittoki: After lying dormant in the earth for so many years, they drag their bodies across the ground and work so hard with blood, sweat, and tears, but once they finally become famous, they’re forgotten just after a year.

Otoya Ittoki: There are so many idols who end up that way. The ones who manage to sell are the lucky ones, some end up not being able to chirp or fly, and after so many years of trying to hold out, there are ones that just end up disappearing.

Haruka Nanami: Ah…

Yes, there are many people like that. Not every student in this school will become an idol or composer.

They come with big dreams, try and try, don’t blossom and end up giving up halfway because they don’t know what to do.

I may end up like that too. Just thinking that... makes me a little sad.

I haven’t been able to take a month’s worth of classes… I'm already running late…

Otoya Ittoki: It’s a tough world out there. … It’s not just fun and games.

Haruka Nanami: … Yes… you’re right…

What's the matter with me? My chest feels tight. I feel like I'm being crushed by anxiety.

Was this magic? I feel like… I'm becoming numb...

But… isn’t some of this what Otoya Ittoki really thinks?

Otoya Ittoki: But if somebody like me is going to live alone... I don’t have anything but the entertainment business…

Haruka Nanami: Eh… What do you mean “somebody like me?”

Otoya Ittoki: I… don’t have parents. Even before I was born, I didn’t have a father, and my mother passed away when I was young.

Ittoki-kun loosens his grip around me and closes his eyes with a lonely expression on his face.

Cecil Aijima: Now! Haruka! Run!!

Haruka Nanami: …

I could run… But I don’t feel like it's the right time.

Otoya Ittoki: But… those parents weren’t even my birth parents. My birth mother is apparently my foster mother’s younger sister. My foster mother took me in shortly after I was born…

Otoya Ittoki: My birth mother then went missing… I don’t know if she’s alive or dead… I don’t even know who my birth father is.

Haruka Nanami: Ittoki... kun.

I didn’t know he went through that.

I’ve never been good at making friends, and it was lonely, but when I went home I could be with my kind parents.

But Ittoki-kun… doesn’t have parents. Even so, he was able to act so energetic and bright.

He's so dismal... Is this Satan’s curse?

Or are these Ittoki-kun’s true feelings?

I can’t tell…

Otoya Ittoki: I grew up at the orphanage… Usually, I played the clown, but I was actually always lonely…

Otoya Ittoki: I thought that if I became independent this year, the best path for me would be to become an idol, right?…

Otoya Ittoki: Besides, if I were to become an idol and become famous… Maybe my parents would notice me…

Haruka Nanami: Ah…

Is that why you’re working so hard…?

Cecil Aijima: Haruka! Don’t be fooled by him! He’s brainwashed by Satan right now!

Yes… that might be true but... I also can’t say he isn’t brainwashed…

Otoya Ittoki: If I were to succeed, maybe I wouldn’t be alone anymore. Haruka, please, help me. I feel like we can do this together.

Ittoki-kun whispers, stroking my hair gently.

Otoya Ittoki: I don’t want to be hidden in the dirt where the sun doesn’t shine and where nobody can see me or be by my side. I want to be basking in the spotlight, in the sun…

Haruka Nanami: … In the sun...

So he means he doesn’t feel like that now? I see… Ittoki is always lonely too.

Otoya Ittoki: That’s why you should give all of yourself to me, Nanami. Your talent, your dreams, your future, your everything… everything…

But…

Cecil Aijima: No! Don’t fall under his spell…! He just wants to erase your music!

Haruka Nanami: … If I give you my all, would you be happy?

Otoya Ittoki: Yes, I will finally smile from the heart. So give me your music…

Cecil Aijima: No! Don’t give it to him! Your music…! Your soul…!

Haruka Nanami: … But if it would make you happy…

I am also lonely, so I want to help him if I can.

Otoya Ittoki: Yes, I would be happy.

Saying that, Ittoki-kun smirks. No… He isn't the type of person to smile like that.

Haruka Nanami: ...But even if I do that, I don’t think you would be happy.

Otoya Ittoki: What?

Ittoki-kun starts to look nervous. But that's probably Satan becoming nervous.

Haruka Nanami: Your music is yours alone, so wouldn’t you have no use for my music? Besides...

Haruka Nanami: You’re making such a sad face. What are you planning to do with my music?

Otoya Ittoki: I…

His eyes wander briefly.

If Ittoki-kun would use it, then I would give it to him.

But… I would be sad if Satan erased my music if I gave it to him.

Haruka Nanami: At the beginning of the school year, I heard you sing behind the school building... You looked like you were having so much fun singing.

Haruka Nanami: Can you sing now? Can you sing in this world without music…?

Haruka Nanami: If I were to give this to you, and then Satan erases all music, you wouldn’t be able to sing anymore. Are you fine with that?

Otoya Ittoki: Ugh… S...to…p… AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!

Ittoki-kun grimaces in pain.

Haruka Nanami: I want to hear your music again… Your song…

Tears stream down my face. Maybe that pain and weakness Ittoki-kun confessed is actually all true.

But he was able to overcome it, and he loves singing more than anything else, and he's here because of his passion. I believe that's what Ittoki-kun is truly like...

I don’t believe he wishes to not sing anymore and erase music.

Even so, it's just so sad that he's being forced to help erase music.

Otoya Ittoki: I want to… sing… I really do… Ugh… must erase music…

Ittoki-kun?

Suddenly, Ittoki-kun holds his head and looks like he's in pain.

Otoya Ittoki: No… I don’t want to erase it… ERASE… NO! I’m… I... Want to… SING!!

Crack!

The invisible barrier breaks.

Cecil Aijima: Haruka, now is the time. I will exorcise him! Give me… your power!

Cecil-san takes my hand and holds his other out towards Ittoki-kun’s chest.

Cecil Aijima: Muse, give us your blessings…

Cecil-san chants a spell. Then...

Haruka Nanami: The melody of the wandering goddess.

The words come from my mouth naturally.

Cecil Aijima: Show us your true form!

Otoya Ittoki: Aah…. AAAAAAAAAAAAaaAAaAAarrrrgGGH!!!

Light envelopes Ittoki-kun’s body. The overflowing brilliance changes into music notes and dances in the sky.

Then, musical notes made of light appear in the air.

Cecil Aijima: This is a guitar’s part... Over here…

Cecil-san reaches out his hand, and the musical notes of light transform into sheet music, and rest in Cecil’s hand.

Otoya Ittoki: I… what did I do…

Haruka Nanami: You were controlled by Satan.

Otoya Ittoki: Satan…?

Haruka Nanami: I will explain.

We go back to the dorm room and I explain everything that's happened so far to Ittoki-kun.

Otoya Ittoki: I see… so that’s what happened…

Haruka Nanami: Yes, it was terrible. … And it will still be terrible.

Otoya Ittoki: So I should practice from this sheet music, right?

Haruka Nanami: Yes, because Kuppuru said so.

Otoya Ittoki: Kuppuru…? Ah... I saw that with my own eyes and yet I still can’t believe it. A human can turn into a cat…!?

Right after we got the sheet music on the roof, Cecil lost all his power and became Kuppuru again.

Now, he's curled up on my lap.

Haruka Nanami: Yes, I couldn’t believe it myself in the beginning… Satan and the Muse… But they are all real…

Haruka Nanami: Music is disappearing from the world. Only we can save it.

Haruka Nanami: Now a part of the score of Agna’s Song has been released. Let’s see… that sheet music is for the guitar’s part, right? You should be able to play the guitar now.

Haruka Nanami: Kuppuru taught all of that. Every time some of the score gets released, some of the Muse’s power revives and Satan’s power is suppressed.

Haruka Nanami: Every time we release some of the sheet music, certain instruments get their sound back as well.

Otoya Ittoki: I see, so the next problem is having a place to practice. Satan hates music, right? If we practice at school, I think he would notice.

Ryuya Hyuga: Don’t worry about that.

Haruka Nanami: Eh, Hyuga-sensei!? Why are you here?

Hyuga-sensei is the S class homeroom teacher and a working idol.

At the same time, he is the Shining Agency’s manager and is widely known as the principal’s right-hand man.

Ryuya Hyuga: I followed you two.

Hyuga-sensei announces without hesitation.

Ryuya Hyuga: The principal started to act strange, and then the entire school became strange too. I tried to look into things but…

Ryuya Hyuga: Seems like the only people who are still acting normally are me and you all. However, I don’t have the same power as you all have.

Ryuya Hyuga: All I can do is pretend that I’m following the principal’s orders and work in the shadows.

Haruka Nanami: Hyuga-sensei, how did you escape being brainwashed?

Ryuya Hyuga: Who knows? My family’s house is a shrine, and my grandpa seemed to have extremely strong spiritual power, so maybe that has something to do with it.

Ryuya Hyuga: Or maybe it was thanks to this…

Hyuga-sensei takes a charm out of his pocket and shows it to us.

Ryuya Hyuga: This is the charm my grandpa gave me. When the principal started acting strange, this burned. Maybe my grandpa protected me.

Otoya Ittoki: … Even if that were true, what do you mean by saying there’s nothing to worry about?

Ryuya Hyuga: Yeah. I looked into things on my own. While I was observing you all, I tried to find a place where you can make your base.

Ryuya Hyuga: Seems like only the dorms are safe from the principal’s power.

Ryuya Hyuga: And… Underground, there’s a recording room that nobody uses.

Ryuya Hyuga: Ittoki, you should hide out down there and practice to avoid getting brainwashed again.

Ryuya Hyuga: The principal is keeping a close watch on me so I can’t always be here with you guys, but I can check on you once in a while. You A Class students can get S Class instruction.

Ryuya Hyuga: You better be grateful for that!

Otoya Ittoki: Ah, y-yes! Thank you!

And with that, we have strong allies like Ittoki-kun and Hyuga-sensei on our side.

I hope we get to collect many sheets of music at this pace and solve the problem quickly.

Ittoki-kun goes with Hyuga-sensei together to the underground secret base, and I'm left with Kuppuru in the room.

Haruka Nanami: I feel confident that Hyuga-sensei is on our side.

Kuppuru: Yes…

Kuppuru closes his eyes and nods.

Haruka Nanami: What’s wrong, Kuppuru... ? Ah! I apologize. Cecil-san, you don’t look too well.

Kuppuru lays on my lap with a lonely look on his face.

Kuppuru: Are you in love with that fellow?

Haruka Nanami: Eh? Do you mean Ittoki-kun?

Kuppuru: Yes. You seemed to understand him very well. You wanted to save him, from the bottom of your heart.

Haruka Nanami: … I don’t hate him… But I don’t know Ittoki-kun well enough that I can say that I love him either. But…

Haruka Nanami: I understand what it feels like to be lonely. I was always alone…

Haruka Nanami: If I had the power to save him, I wanted to save him….That’s what I thought at the time.

Kuppuru: Haruka… So you were lonely as well. … I will always be by your side.

Kuppuru: I will always… be by your side… I will not allow you to be lonely. Never… never…

Ah, I see. Cecil-san is lonely too. He's worried about me.

Haruka Nanami: Cecil-san… Thank you. Let’s do our best together until we defeat Satan.

Kuppuru: Yes. I will protect you no matter what. So please, don’t worry…

I can’t do anything by myself, but I feel like I can defeat Satan as long as we’re together.

Mini Game

That night, Hyuga-sensei calls me, and we go to the recording room.

He's worried about the fact that I'm not able to take classes.

So, he lets me do special private lessons with him!

However, to make sure I'm qualified, he makes me take a surprise test.

Haruka Nanami: A surprise test, huh…

I’ve been studying ever since I got into this school, but I'm a bit worried…

Ryuya Hyuga: You’ll be OK; it’s not that difficult.

I'm looking down so he gets worried about me and gives me words of encouragement.

Ryuya Hyuga: This is a simple paper test. Most of the questions are pretty basic, so you should be able to solve them easily!

Teacher… I don’t deserve your kind words… But I will try my best!

Ryuya Hyuga: Well, this is just a test to measure your knowledge. Just pick out the answers from the choices given to you.

Haruka Nanami: Yes!

Ryuya Hyuga: Let’s begin the test!

S Rank

Cecil Aijima: You are the only one that I am gazing at…

When I go back to the room and show Kuppuru the 100% on my test…

Kuppuru turns back into Cecil… He kneels before me and gently takes my hand.

I… I don’t know what to do when he’s looking at me like that!

Haruka Nanami: T-thank you… very much...

I can’t say much else.

It feels like I'm going to have another thrilling day tomorrow too.

Chapter End

[superblysubpar]

Hi babe! I need to talk to someone who don’t know about this situation ‘cause I’m going CRAZY; I have a crush for one of my friend, I’ve liked him for three years (I know I’m embarrassing), in 2020 we had a period where we dated, but at some point he broken up with me because he didn’t like me anymore. At the begging I was not bothered with this, but then after new year, I became very sad, and depressed, I had a very dark period, when I was as hanging out with my friend the most of the time I didn’t speak, I was so angry with myself, and I blamed myself for what happened because finally I had found someone who likes me, and then, maybe for my temper (I have trust issues, at the begging I’m a little cold) he left me. At some point I stopped drinking alcohol because when I became drunk, I locked me in the bathroom for crying, or for throwing up and sometimes I called him a piece of shit 😃 he was always there because we have the same friend.

BUT, I noticed that recently when I make a joke he laughs A LOT, he’s the only one who laughs at something it’s not so funny, maybe I do a sarcastic comment under my breath and he laughs!!!! And when he does obviously I laugh too and I look at him and he looks at me, and this beautiful thing happens where both of us laugh and we look at each other, last week it happened and I wanted TO DIE, we almost fell out of chairs I’m not joking. (The same night he gifted me some Harry Potter’s stuff he found in a sort of chocolate egg ‘cause I didn’t have it and he had them double)

I don’t feel the same love I did three years ago, but when this things happen I want to punch myself because I know that maybe he just trying to be friendly, he want to be my friend (and I want too) so I have to wake up and go on, but I can’t, today he texted me for asking a thing about the city I live, and then he asked me how I was and then he told me he was good too except for the hot weather, I was like a kid in the candy store but I kept telling my self that he was just being friendly he doesn’t care about me 😭😭😭😭

Sorry for this looong ramble, but I have to tell to someone to see if I’m the one who sees things and you look like a really good and sweet person, sorry if I took your time 💛

-🍝 (I’m the Italian one who go crazy for Jo’s hands😇)

Aww babe 💛 so to be fully transparent, I'm totally not a relationship advice person in terms of knowing how dating is going today / or having been with multiple people. I had two boyfriends growing up (one who was actual literal garbage in the form of a human flesh, but that's a different story) and then my now husband who I've been with for almost 12 years.

All I can say is something I've learned with being with him for so long. We were friends first and that I think is always the most important thing to me. He's my best friend, and I still wanna tell him everything & that totally stems from the friendship we formed before dating. But what I've learned through that friendship and our relationship is just communication 💛

If you're confused about your title/what this is - ask him. If you wanna put your heart out there - do it. Whatever happens, then you know and you're not left with questions and what ifs and it's all out there - for both of you to know. Sure, it could end up ruining what you have or make things messier, but then in my opinion it wasn't meant to be and you don't have to spend more energy wondering. It of course wouldn't be all perfect and feeling good right away, but I promise you that a future you will be happy you communicated how you were feeling.

Also, I think for your particular situation, it would be really beneficial to talk about how things went down and what's happened since if you never had those kind of chats before. It sounds like you went through a lot together as well as personally and talking it out is always beneficial in my opinion 💛

Also! Even if he's just a friend, then you have a really great friend you can not only laugh with, but have these cool and meaningful convos with, you know?

I really hope this helped! 💛

- XOXO Gossip Girl Taylor

[gazs-blue-hat]

This might be a hot take but I’m still going for it.

CoD WWII spoilers. MWI spoilers. MWII spoilers. CoD Ghosts spoilers.

I think it’s very interesting to see the different viewpoints on the games. I’m only going to speak in binary terms of gender just to simplify a bit. (My enby and trans friends are still loved and so so so valid. I’m just spitting this out before I forget.)

The mostly male side of the fan base focuses on the weaponry, the combat, the missions and whatnot. That part of COD is what has kept me away from playing the games for so long.

Until my brother came to me absolutely sobbing after playing WWII. He was the classic dude bro who would think WWII was all that and a bag of chips. Seeing what Zussman had to go through, seeing Tanner’s sacrifice only to be pushed aside absolutely broke him. As his big sister, I was there to hold him as he cried real tears for these men.

The female part is the fan base mostly (I’m being really generous here. Ofc this doesn’t mean everybody but I’m just generalizing) cares about the men themselves. They care about the characters and their relationships. I’ve had long conversations with my little brother about the characters as if they were people rather than video game characters.

If you really think about it, the games are full of incredibly tender moments between brothers in arms. We see true selflessness in Alex Keller as he fully accepts a suicide mission from Farah for the sole reason that he believes in her cause.

We see Price find Kyle and form an incredibly strong bond together. They are with one another through thick and thin. We see Alejandro and Rudy have a strong brotherly relationship! Ghost actually WAITS in a very dangerous place for his buddy that’s injured, going so far as to help him through and keep him from panicking.

I know a lot of us (myself included) think these men are hot. But I think the truly most attractive thing about them is the true love and dedication they have for the causes they’re fighting for. That’s why I’ve always felt more drawn to core 141 rather than König or others. (I love them all but I don’t know their stories to be invested in them like I am 141)

Basically, these games have beautiful narratives about sacrifice, brotherhood and fighting for a cause. I feel like people don’t see the story in the game and just…play it. I remember playing through Ghosts with my dad. He had to hold me as Elias was killed by Rourke. I felt real emotions for the characters on screen. After the whole thing, my dad paused the game and wiped my tears, telling me how proud he was that I was able to FEEL for these fictional people. He always said my empathy was one of my strongest points.

I might be looking too deeply into this but I think that if people took the proper time to watch these games as if they were movies instead of games, a lot more could come out of them.

The human story is full of war and soldiers who shine bright against the chaos.

But it is also full of scared young men and women who just want to make a difference in the world.

War is not glorious. It’s not something to hold on a pedestal and say “those were the days”. Peace…is what we should all strive for. When people can just be people and be happy.

y’know…. conversations about world war ii would be a lot more bearable and constructive if white men found that period rightly horrific rather than pornographic 

[pluto-the-chinchilla]

Let me preface this by saying that if MARS by Fuyumi Soryo has no diehard fans I am dead.

Okay, cool!

Now I was so happy to hear how many people these days recommend the manga and sing its praises because yes I totally think it’s deserved. And I’m just as happy that people include trigger warnings for the SA, s//cide, and dark themes.

Buuut there’s a few other trigger warnings or also like to throw out there.

I’ll put actual spoilers under a cut but additional trigger warnings for Mars;

While I don’t think it was intentional (or so I hope) it is not great with how it handles LGBT. The token homosexual/bisexual character is not someone you want to root for and there’s a throwaway character later who…

I can’t tell if they’re trans or some form of cross dresser but regardless it’s handled in that weird way 80s/90s media handled it which is that even when it doesn’t feel malicious it reads as uncomfortably ignorant. I actually like the character themself but I can’t even tell what their identity is because the dialogue regarding them is conflicting and truly think it boils down to being badly misinformed about how LGBT (partially T) folks are in real life or the actual psych of gender/sexuality which…

I mean again the manga started in 1996 and ended at the start of one of 2000s which was a particularly catty/mean decade.

Anyway into spoilers. This isn’t a deep dive or anything, I just have thoughts and nobody who really reads stuff like this.

Masao Kirishima wouldn’t bother me if he wasn’t the only non-straight character in the series. I’m serious. Like I’m fine with him being an emotionally manipulative sociopath who just genuinely doesn’t understand or appreciate empathy. He doesn’t have a lot of great depth but I actually find him at least a little interesting in how he felt alone in his misanthropy and violence and thought he found a kindred spirit in Rei. I loved seeing his composure break when he realized Rei had fully embraced his humanity and that he was well and truly alone.

Still a cop out how after stabbing Rei he just completely forgot about him. The story didn’t earn the right to just sweep him under the rug and at that point it felt like an excuse to have that odd Rei and Sei moment which… at that point just make it a dream.

Maybe maybe the cage confrontation between Rei and Masao more dramatic. Have more of that breakage happen and maybe show him having a full blown panic attack after he runs off, reflecting on their history and how it’s all being written over by the Rei who was changed by Kira loving him and just have him collapse in an alley. Maybe the rewritten imagery of memories blocking one another out could lend itself to Masao repressing the memories after having such a break. Imagery of Kira painting over the violent Rei with her own award winning painting of Mars. Like Kira herself painting Masao out of the picture.

Just an idea.

Rei and Sei meeting could happen in a dream after Rei speaks to his old doctor and maybe feature his mother and real father all reaching out to him. Or have it happen after a bike accident. Maybe Masao shambled out into the street in his daze or maybe he wanted to get killed by Rei so that Rei would never fully be rid of him or any other leak in logic cuz honestly Masao is malleable. And Rei hurting himself just to avoid killing him could’ve been another cause for that final break.

Otherwise… I can only imagine Masao is faking it but is in a stupor waiting to get out so he can end it all.

Also.

I like Violet, I think they’re cute and fun and I wish we got more of them with the caveat being I wish their gender identity was clearer and better written, even as a throwaway character. I thought their friendship was Kira was cute and it would’ve been nice to have the two of them and Harumi hang out.

Wish Harumi was better written and got a more proper redemption arc. They just kinda became friends after Harumi stood up for her one time. I don’t mind that they’re friends but I wish we could’ve gotten a heart to heart with them really unpacking the bullying, their shared love for Rei, maybe a little light in her and Tatsuya…

And I wish violent!Harumi could’ve showed up in Kira’s defense

Maybe explore the connective tissue of Harumi’s violence next time Rei’s

Maybe Masao could’ve gotten under her skin and that could’ve lead to some Tatsuya development wherein he worries about succumbing too

And Rei stops him from going too far for a change and it’s a switch up from their usual friend dynamic and it strengthens their bond

Maybe explore brotherhood with Tatsuya vs Sei

Idk Tatsuya and Harumi are underutilized but I love them ok?

[saintescuderia]

Things I Learned from Ricky Gervais’ ‘After Life.’

I was told I would cry from laughter — and from ugly emotional sobbing.

Ricky Gervais and I have a love-hate relationship.

One the one hand, he is one of the funniest comedians who haven’t diluted their craft for the sake of pleasing people. He makes jokes because he finds them funny. He is self-assured in his humour that nothing phases him — not even society’s politically correct tendencies — but it also means he just doesn’t give a shit. If you’re offended, that’s on you. There is no sensitivity here.

Which actually sums up his character, Tony, quite well.

We meet Tony who is struggling to make sense of life in the wake of his wife’s death. For him, he would’ve committed suicide had it not been for the fact that he needed to feed the dog. And that brings me to the first point.

#1 / Animals are sometimes (read: often) better.

I say this because one of the scenes that really got me was when Tony and his dog, a German Shepherd by the name of Brandy, visit the beach. Tony looks at the water and remembers a memory of his wife. Suddenly overwhelmed with the familiar desire to end it, he tries again. Wading into the water fully dressed, he keeps going in and in — until Brandy notices as starts desperately barking at him. Tony hears her and reluctantly comes out to be with his dog. Brandy might not have given him a reason to live— the show’s whole premise is that only you can give that to yourself — but she gave him a reason to not kill himself.

#2 You can grieve yourself.

This show was recommended to me in that, “if you’ve ever experienced loss, it’ll hit.” Now, I have never really lost anyone really close to me. All the funerals I’ve attended in my life had been some convoluted relation in the community in which I was there was an extension of my parents. I don’t know death. I don’t know loss. Not really.

But, the show did come at a time when life had done a complete overhaul with me. People had walked out, I had flipped out. Without warning, my life had completely changed. I was still processing everything that had happened which made me struggle at times to recognise the person in the mirror. I had a lot to grieve in that so many doors had closed — doors I though had remained open forever.

Tony’s navigation through his pain and suffering was something I could relate to all too well. He held so much anger within himself that lashing out was his way of coping. He punished others to create distance. The coping mechanism of pushing everyone as a form of self-punishment because he couldn’t save his wife; that he doesn’t want anyone else close anymore because they could disappear and cause him more grief to mourn.

That, or I’m just projecting.

#3 Support comes in many forms.

Admittedly, Tony was an asshole to to the people around him. Lenny, a co-worker who loves to eat, receives the blunt of many a food-related joke as Tony pokes fun of his size and appetitie. A new girl to the workplace, Sandy, asks Lenny if it bothers him. Lenny shrugs it off, completely indifferent.

“Nah, he’s just a mate.”

And you think, honey no, that guy’s being a dick to you. Tony isn’t his friend, he literally calls him a pig. One sequence has Tony holding onto the back of Lenny’s neck and talking about his neck fat.

Yet, at the end, it turns out that Lenny, the clueless and hungry Lenny, was actually right. During a tangent at the end of the show where Tony realises how grateful he is for the people in his life, he thanks Lenny for being his “human stress ball.”

Lenny didn’t do anything spectacular. He didn’t chase after Tony like his brother-in-law who would try to come up with ways to make Tony happy. Lenny just knew this was Tony’s was of coping and took it and let him have this as a cathartic outlet.

Which reminds me —

#4 Don’t be an asshole.

I kept waiting for the therapist’s asshole-ish ways to pay off and give Tony the answer he was seeking. That the tough, careless ‘love’ was actually love and there would be a turning point.

Spoilers: it never came.

In fact, the turning point came from Tony’s conversations with a lady he befriends at the cemetary. She had lost her husband and they would often sit together and talk. A kind, simple lady. Her name was Anne and she delivered one of the key lines from the show that stuck with me.

“I know you might not like living, but you make the world a better place.”

(Or something along those lines. I may be misremembering since I was sobbing throughout it all.)

Tony realises that punishing humanity only adds to the problem — Anne’s line of “they grow in numbers” about the assholes of the world is the plain truth — and that doesn’t work for him. Not anymore. The pain he felt actually eased when he did good things. And it’s easier to do good things if you just try to be a good person overall.

This train of thought led him to finally start to change his life. From cleaning up the dishes around his house to buying proper food to showing tokens of appreciation to the people around him. Tony sees that he’s not the only victim of life and that everyone has their own shit. Giving people the benefit of the doubt and trying to do good is much better for the soul than adding to the asshole tally of the world.

“A society grows great when old men plant trees, the shade of which they know they’ll never sit in.”

[grasshopperdoingdogpaddle]

People are asking for random ratings from people so I request a ranking of Chase Young's top 5 attempted murders

Not sure what criteria to use to rank attempted murder... but I'm game?

A lot of the time Chase doesn't bother with actually trying to merk someone since he'd rather use them as pawns or intimidate and rule over them. So I'll only use the genuine, unambiguous times he was definitely trying to end someone's life on-screen.

5 - Jack, by trying to crush him with a boulder

The best part about this one was all the facial expressions we got. From Chase's smug smile as he says he's "finally about to get rid of him" to the look of absolutely shock and disappointment he shares with Wuya when Jack manages to get up. It’s golden, especially coming from someone as composed as Chase. It feels almost like a Swiper "aw man" moment, but about murder instead of petty theft.

He's pretty flippant about holding a life in his hands. He revels in it, in fact, says that Spicer’s painful death has been a long time coming. So seeing him so confused at not actually pulling it off was funny. This isn’t someone who’s used to messing up his assassinations.

Also, it's quite cute how the Xiaolin monks were the ones who saved Jack from this untimely fate.

4 - Raimundo, by almost biting him in half

It is a good thing Clay is a quick thinker, because Chase was really going for it. He was fully primed to bite someone in half for trying to take back Omi. 

It gives us confirmation that Chase will eat a human without hesitation, and the moment had some excellent tension in it. A nice quick show of the bond between the monks and how hard they try for each other.

A nice glimpse of how Chase's thoughts, too. The look on his face switching from that smug smirk as he caught the punches, into the murderous glare right before he shifted his dragon form, is very interesting to read into. It’s fun to get that occasional reminder that Chase is capable of being very brutal and evil, just in case him burning down that entire village for a laugh and plunging the world into darkness doesn’t quite doing it.

3 - Guan, by pushing him in the pit of fire

The first time we really see how far Chase is willing to go. It was a neat way to set the tone for what kind of villain Chase Young is, and the scene is definitely harsher in hindsight once we learn the history between Guan and Chase.

The other monks all on the sidelines reacting with such abject horror, and the visible beads of sweat on Guan's face while he struggles, before he finally managed to free himself just in time... This fight felt fun and intense to watch.

2 - Hannibal (disguised as Clay), by pinning him down and trying to stab him in the face

The only time on this list where I was actually rooting for Chase.

Usually Chase’s staff has blades at its ends, so I assume Chase was about to shoot out the blades and stab Hannibal? I’m not entirely sure that would even work on Hannibal, but Chase sure hoped it would.

This whole scene was such a great use of dramatic irony. It hurts all the more that this was their last chance at preventing the evil that is Hannibal Roy Bean from being released into the world and the monks themselves accidentally got in the way. Chase waiting by the temple gate and Ying-Ying being so happy to see Hannibal again that she flies straight to him really elevates the moment. It establishes a lot of interesting dynamics in just a minute.

1 - Dojo, by almost making him into Lao Mang Lone Soup

I love Dojo but this was just too hilarious.

Dojo sat in a simmering pot of soup and still needed more hints to figure out what was happening here. 

Chase introduced himself into the story by getting ready to murder Dojo’s legendary dragon, and he even makes a thinly-veiled threat to throw the monks into the soup and eat them, too. 

The usually cautious and skittish Dojo has lost his sense of self-preservation because he was given a nice cookie. And Chase has been planning this for apparently so long. Comedy gold, truly.

The animosity between Chase and Dojo is set up and stays consistent for the whole rest of the series after this. Chase puts the blame for his finale plan falling apart squarely on the fact that he was robbed of the chance to eat Dojo then and there.